It was a displeasing sight today… The weather didn’t seem happy; dusky clouds arrived to spit and spray all over the town of Fillypig. The sound of the drums rolled after the bright flash of glass shot down. These noises mean trouble.
I ran hard into my safety zone, shut and locked the doors tight, cuddled up in my bed, and not giving a single flick of worry on and about. I opened my lamp to find some shine as my comfort; the warmth flowed into my veins and blood, while outside was just stormy and upset. It was the perfect time to do nothing but relax and regain my fresh breath.
Little did I know, I was too unaware, the common enemy behind all emotional criminals:
“THIS IS SOOOO BORING!” I cried out loud, the sound was enough to break the glass windows. Monotonous amounts of time to kill when I don’t need it, how hard can life be sometimes even when I sit still like flamingo? Why, this world is leading me the strangest and corrupted maze I’ve never walked!
BAM! Goes the thunder, BOOM! BANG was all that the sky yelled out.
“Alright alright! I got you! I will think of something worthwhile to do! Don’t tick me!” I replied, shaking my head and telling myself that I’m talking to a vast space of nothingness. Which is just plain dumb and ridiculous if you ask me.
I searched through closets, nothing. Peeked into drawers, nothing. Even looking into my bookbag, I noticed an object shining dimly, could it be my savior? I reached my hoof to it, swiped it out, AND I COULD NOT BELIEVE MY EYES.... MY EYES ARE JUST SPEECHLESS...
"A FREAKIN' BANANA PEEL?!" I angrily pointed to my faithless bag and the useless yellow fruit skin.
Tired and worn out, I finally crawled back to my bedroom, sweating like a true work pony.
“Wow,” I said to my room, “Do you have any ideas that can entertain me?”
Wild thunder cracked out loud once again RIGHT when I’m in my standing position. I was startled, and knocked into my wardrobe (wait hold on, isn’t that a closet? Umm, this is a specific type of closet, which I forgot to search, sooo… Yea), and to my unknown surprise, a notebook fell out. I picked it up, flipped it open (well of course rubbing the dust off first), and skimmed through it. It came to my gallery that this was supposed to be my childhood present for my 7th birthday, but I was just too young to understand anything, therefore I threw it away somewhere in my room.
“Huh,” I said, “Well at least I’m going to do something!” I encouraged myself, but it was fruitless. Why would I go through for something and yet find nothing but something that even my childhood was wise enough to not acknowledge it at first place? Again if one observes critically: this notebook was no ordinary notebook, but a sketchbook made by one of the best school supply brands in the world, buuut sadly it was made in Pony's Republic of China, so I guess that evens out the whole quality thing.
Immediately, I opened to my first page, and tried to think of something to draw about… And 10 minutes have passed, I discovered nothing, absolutely NOTHING TO SHARE WITH THE SKETCHBOOK!
“YOU!” I COMMANDED TO IT, “YOU BETTER THINK OF SOMETHING FOR ME TO TALK ABOUT WITH YOU, OR ELSE I’M GOING TO LEAVE YOU BEHIND THOSE RAGGED CLOTHES!”
For some reason I turned around and saw my t-shirt receiving some dust on its sleeves, despite that was natural and normal; that moment made me believe that the t-shirt was somewhat upset with my insult. What’s even funnier is that on it, it says, “Either I’m just too cool for you or you can’t keep up with me being too hot.”
This boosted my brain right away; I quickly picked the pen up perfectly in between my front teeth, scribbled lines and planes, forming these random shapes... Finally, the first work was shown, it was a simple drawing of a unicorn keeping his cool with his earplugs on while a Pegasus was enraged with him and insulting him with the most immature temper and words.
“Wow! That was worth the time!” I told myself, “I really made myself the night!”
That feeling of accomplishment left my thoughts scattered all over my disturbed brain. The compression of distributing so many wondrous and fantastic ideas all at once has dragged my legs on the ground, unable to move. Thunder roared and lightning jumped, not even their fearful attributes can set me off to begin another adventure into drawing; I just don’t know where the hay to start! It’s so darn frustrating!
All of a sudden, a bolt bought an end to my vision and the light (well at least for awhile), now it’s not only at nighttime, but the world was pitched and well sealed off. Ooooh how chilly and frozen I am! No light to warm up Luna’s territory now, nowhere to see through, the darkness hides everything from being known, and it’s just sickening and worrisome!
Tap tap tap…
My imagination once again was sitting on my throne, I feel like just crying now.
”When ponies don’t know their place or have any knowledge to spend on, their flame dies along with their heart. No more order, no more harmony, unless we fight against the true nature that lurks ahead of us…” This quote I intelligently invented was made into a splendid picture. One pony standing up to one of the most common and feared phobia: Nightmare Moon, as silhouettes of other ponies are fighting for the same exact reason,
“Ah, how inspiring and touching this work is!” I complimented to myself, happy again for fulfilling my second drop of water into my mile high jar…
Creaaaaak…
My finished task was once again done, now I can start over and enter the next door, “Just wait and see…” I told whoever that heard me with full confidence,
“I’m going to lighten everything up with my own world!”
Screeech!
I paused, dead cold… What the hay was that I just heard? Did something just enter my house? Liquid quickly ran out to check on what in the tarnation is going on. The strange sound now killed my thoughts and my mind could not shove it away. The clown was never a funny prank.
Do you want to play with me?
I could do nothing but turn my sweating head around, and right there, no more than a hoof away: were two red eyeballs, glowing and staring right into my own eyes… A bloody horn and the unicorn’s hair were dangling from everywhere, man was this just insane! Where did this monster come from? Did it just teleport into my shell…? I… This…
RRRRRRGGGGHHHHHH!
“AHHHHH! STOP! SOMEPONY! HELP ME!” I screamed in the disturbance of the monstrous unicorn’s horrifying face as she opens her mouth, blood there also, dripping from her sharp and crooked teeth. The next thing I realized that my head is pulled inside her mouth. Even worse, she even began counting to shut it up on me. MAKE IT QUICK! I HAVE TO GET OUT OF THIS! I tried to hold her mouth open, but she simply used her cheap magic to control my movements. While I was inside the unicorn’s mouth, my face was pressed against her disgusting and rough tongue. The blackness swallowed me once again, the unicorn’s face just SPAWNS again in my darkness, this time smiling wickedly, and creating bunch of evil laughter that I never could’ve imagined to back away from.
“NO! STOP THIS! PLEASE!” I prayed to Luna, “I’M SORRY FOR REMINDING YOU OF YOUR PAST! I DIDN’T MEAN IT!” My cries were simply just rustles in the wild night, and faded among the stars, everything I beseech for was rejected and futile. The unicorn let go of my head for some unknown reason, she backed off casually, then TELEPORTED RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME SCREAMING AND BITING ON MY HEAD AGAIN, READY TO SNAP…
SNAP! Were my senses regained to consciousness.
“Boy! *Huff huff* Was that a *huff* sweeshkabab *huff* roller coaster ride! *Huff huff*”
While I panted heavily with lead on top of my cherry shortcake (how Pinkie Pie wouldn’t appreciate that and run off! Speaking of Pinkie, I was invited to her “important” party because… Well she said it was urgent… And I was rewarded cherry shortcakes in return! Oh how the sweet candyland of Equestria can anypony make such divine goods?!), I had not been ignorant of the expedition my mental movie screen had took me to. That whole drawing of Nightmare Moon... Was just a whole imagination, no, a dream! A prophecy! An ominous omen?! Had conquered me into eternal darkness, that nightmare encounter with the unicorn was definitely one of my worst fears in my private theory.
On my fourth page… Wait what happened to the third one? What did I draw on that? Well after that detailed shortcake was cherry-sh enough to be eligible for my appetite, I decided to mingle my hunger and imagination into one big hot air balloon; taking me wherever I wanted to go. Once that was done, the world was beneath my hooves once more, I could not get any hyped like this.
“Buddy, aren’t you and I excited!” I asked my mind in such a tone that I don’t even need its opinion, I just want to be here forever!
“Aren’t you pumped up for some sillyfilly surprises, Sketch?!” I turned to ask the sketchbook.
The morale, the idealism, rules, order, harmony, mattered to me like griffons soaring in the colossal skies. I just want Sketch to draw more colors into me. Well, about that part… Nothing happened… It got pretty darn awkward and quiet, that even Silence itself grew bored. It signaled me with a whisper: of nothingness. Therefore I drew a large smiley face on Sketch’s fourth page, assuming that the little book was ready to take another course on a new, unknown coaster…
The coaster was not always the steady stallion that my confidence always relied on; there were uphill challenges as well. Just thinking and thinking about those hardships makes me want to draw it out, but the overthinking has caught the better of me. This time, the lines were all crooked, the colors don't fit right, this picture does not make any grass of sense. My obstacles were often pretty steep and obscure, my heart hid itself in a thick quilt. I soon drew out my flaws, my problems, daily conflicts... Oh can somepony stop my mind and open my teeth? The color pencils are pleading in vain to be free from my mouth! From ten pages to the fiftieth, I have wasted my time and energy on what I did not originally plan to express. Even if I'm alone in my house, my mane would sweat and stress out because I'm sharing my information with "myself" and Sketch. I wished I never had seen my awful and painful drawings on my insecurity, burning my pride into ashes. I darted all over my room, searching for pins to stab my eyes out, so that they will never have the clarity to force me onto the dreadful truth.
"Haha, don't worry guys." I chuckled to my eyeballs, "I will make sure that you can remain safe in quenched sight forever..."
I now fell over my chair, the party was just getting started. I knocked over my closets, dumped clothes all over the floor, thrusting my skull into the wall. Bloody and insane like my imagined unicorn friend. I smiled with the most unreal happiness in all my life.
"Heh heh, if I can't blind myself, I guess I'll just have to conclude everyone else I've met in my life!"
I tipped and toppled over the cold floor, but managed to get to my kitchen and grab a knife or two. The rampage had officially begun...
Hadn't it for my insanity, the doors wouldn't have been abused with the harsh slashes. Hadn't it for my anger, clothes wouldn't have been screaming in terror as I tear them piece by piece. Hadn't it for my selfishness, those important objects and memories of those who I cared for wouldn't have been sucked in the void...
"NO ONE WILL KNOW WHO I AM NOW! I AM PERFECTION! I HAVE NO KNOWN FLAWS SHOWN!" I yelled out until my throat was torn apart.
I stabbed my own hooves rapidly in the same exact spot, as if I only can see one spot at a time, my life is draining down the sink hole yet I have failed to recognize the termination I have planned for myself in my map, the train is already whistling for my last stop. The sky was furious, following my rhythm of sadism. BOOM! AND BANG! Was all it tapped out, the beat of the thunder, the stops during the lightning, and the background music of the endless rain... These factors are just the right supporters of my maniacal side that is willing to destroy every evidence there is in order to prevent exposure to humiliation...
Finally, I panted to my bedroom, bleeding and worn out, I can only think of one objective: To destroy the accursed notebook,
"You!... I spoke to it, "You are the nuisance who brought me to this! It was YOU who gave me corruption and disorder! I wouldn't have reminded myself as a clumsy fool if it wasn't for you! I wouldn't have remembered my fogged up featherbrain always letting those who I loved down if it wasn't for you! I wouldn't have looked through the puddle of water back then as a laughing haystack in school and peers if it wasn't for you! You made me see the whole truth and direct the blade into myself!!!!".
I spat at the book with full animosity; I can only think of vengeance and antagonism as held out the thirsty knife into my mouth, ready to pounce on the helpless thing...
BOOM! BANG! The clouds interfered, but that wasn't the only wall that I could not penetrate: The window in front of my desk was opened for some unknown reason, and before I can glare back down at the sketchbook, the air flipped the pages, back from where I started. Those drawings... Those colors... Those lights... I dropped the knife without hesitation, it collapsed just as my demon did. My mood switched positions like a functional carousel. The bitter frown faded into a room where it was locked forever, once that was done, drops of familiar filly glands rolled out...
"*Sniff sniff*, I *sniff*... What in the name of Celestia was I *sniff* doing? *Sniff sniff* This shouldn't be happening..." The words were gone with the wind, I fell over on my bed behind me, crying, sobbing. The pain was inevitable, I can only dance with the rain, under the gloomy skies. Why has this happened? Why did Luna set the endless night on me? "I'M SORRY SKETCH!" I called out to my friendly notebook,
"I DIDN'T WANT IT TO HAPPEN LIKE THIS! IT WAS ALL ME! IT WAS MY FAULT! I'M A NOPONY!"
The insult just further stretches my injuries, I cried until there were no more tears being shed left. Soon, I had already drawn my dark secrets out: My mother's funeral, the unfortunate me of never getting to see my grandparents before birth because they left to live above the clouds. My relatives were bunch of drunk trash, wild and foalish. My first crush crushed, that burst my spirit and heart apart, I can think no more of myself being worthy in this world... Pony Express accident while a trip to Canterlot, the evil and high mountains were the vicious offenders that killed all of my closest friends...
Thunder roared and winds shouted, then there was me lying on the bed, deeply trapped in the quicksand I set up for myself. I hoped to get the famous spell from Star Swirl the Bearded, so that I can travel back in time to fix all of my errs. I then took a heavy and deep breath, knowing inside me, that was ridiculous and impossible.
"Well... What is there to do?" I asked myself the same question this time with a huge shift in tone. Was there anyway to see the good in me?
My parents always praised me for having such a sweet voice, I was always the lead singer in the Canterlot High classical rock band, called the "Harmonious Resonance", because of my friends' perfect coordination and our charm were dandelions flying all over... I am a dulcet to the others. Every once in awhile, the mares would pretend to behave calm when they see me, but they could not tolerate and whisper out loud on my mellifluous eyes. "Girls..." I snickered, "Are just pretty liars sometimes eh?"
"THAT'S IT!" I exclaimed with the highest beat in my heart, I quickly got up off my bed, flipped Sketch onto a new page, bit the color pencils into my mouth, and paced my mind into my strengths. Here, I have created new sorts of images, that I truly want to depict to other ponies. My talent of singing the finest notes, my friendliness that soothes anypony in a lightning flash (speaking of which, a lightning bolt was fired again when I drew this), those who I shown gratitude to, those who admired me (especially those chicks)... And the truth was waiting by the corner the whole time! Everything I drew on Sketch was just a piece of my beloved memory, whether good or the bad. It was all just another experience that was the missing piece of the roller coaster track, there were sharp ups and steep downs, but nevertheless straight and constant altitude on the coaster was common throughout my lifetime as well. Those adored, chubby filly times of mines, oh how can I ever get my hooves and nose off those years of me!
Once I'm officially finished for now, coincidentally, clear skies reopened the curtains, the birds glided gracefully chirping like my pleasant voice. Sunlight exerted rays all over Equestria shining on all shadows and sad spots. The miracle was sweet! I could not have gone this far, thanks to my new friend, Sketch. Unfortunately, the book now is exhausted without any pages left to fill in, that melancholy did deal me a blow in the gut, but it was merely a self foolishness.
"I can always get more of your twins!" I told Sketch calmly. I have not came to my senses: that I already gave an old and a simple drawing book a name that I personally loved ever since I laid my inexperienced hooves on its first page! I took a delighted hop out of my door, and held up my best friend high and up in the air, close to the sun as possible, the blood is pacing through my whole body as I held forth,
"Today my fellow fillies and gentlecolts! My foul (pun for foal) ways has stood to the better of me, not until I have met this good, reliable, trustworthy, and helpful friend: A Sketchbook! It was it that guided me the faithful light, into the true clarity of who I actually am. In fact, not even a failure despite all my flaws and defeats, but nevertheless, I knew that Princess Luna had opened the windows purposely to let nature work with Sketch and helped me see my strengths. This new confidence itched me to get back up and try once more. I would like to thank her and Sketch, again, and everypony who stopped just to listen to my speech! *Sniff*, I gladly will take your generous offerings... Thank you for everything Sketch..."
Tears dropped once more, even I felt the motivation flowing through my veins. The ponies who stopped to hear me speak, stopped, froze in ice, opened their mouth wide. I was feeling awkward now for declaiming randomly, was this the right thing to do? No no! I shook my head furiously, I did what I had to do, this was worth the time. The audiences soon began to cry too, without any bit of noise, and clapped solo without cheers nor compliments. l did not care; all I needed was their respect, I am not those featherbrains who actually seek for attention only.
Triumphed, I turned my view back on Sketch, "Hey little buddy!" I said to it, "Those secrets I expressed to you, won't be shared with anyone okay?" The ecstasy floated in my hot air balloon in a circle, I wrote a note, asking the Princesses how was my accomplishment. Sadly, no response came back, but the trees simply smiled with the greenest dimming light from the Summer leaves. The sun suddenly burst again, it brightened me up the whole truth: If Sketch is the only one who can keep my secrets despite not even being a pony, then...
"... Sketch is just my alternate spirit trying to save me?" Scootaloo ended the Equestria Daily's heading page (in the section on Tips For Fillies On How to Earn a Cutie Mark), but confused and disappointed.
"Com'on this is so lame! I thought the ending would be way more awesome!" She continued, sitting in the playground, with bunch of other school fillies playing and laughing like ignorant and innocent fillies.
Today in Ponyville the sky was colored with deep navy blue, the sun was highly placed at noon, and the eagerness for Summer in all fillies was just starting.
"Scootaloo!" Sweetie Belle replied, "Have some respect for the elders! They worked hard on this you know?"
"Eeyup!" Apple Bloom added, "Ain't no hay will not be inspired by something like that!" The Pegasus and the Unicorn both turned around to the third Crusader, realizing sometimes it's tough trying to comprehend to her country accents.
"Well, I'm still wondering who wrote this?" Scootaloo now sounded even more hopeless, as if she was trying to sound ironic to what she said previously about the last line from the mysterious pony who made this.
"You are right Scoots." The Earth filly agreed, "The name was never shown on this writing."
The three good friends looked up into the endless sky, until Sweetie Belle closed the conversation, "Well, sometimes secrets are meant to be secrets! No sketchbook is gonna tell us that!"
They giggled as if they are having a good time, and I really appreciated their ways. I looked down at my own matured body: It has grown a lot since the first day I met Sketch. Time flew like a falcon... Now I knew so much, learned so much, found so much... There are more to go and paint in the colors, yet so little time...
While I was troubled by this deep thought, ready to be analyzed critically, something light and round fell on my head. I picked it up and opened the roll, it was a letter. Often I would read the letter first and then discover who was it that wrote this to me, but this time I was in a refreshing mood that I just felt like peeking at the writer.
"A LETTER FROM PRINCESS CELESTIA?!" I astoundingly exclaimed. My body is all shivering without me knowing whether it was in a good way or bad. I took a huge gulp, threw some sweats, and began the read aloud,
Dear Melodic Blues,
Princess Luna has told me about your enormous step in your growth, it was interesting when you mentioned your encounter with....
Fin.