Pinkies Torment

by Mochas Dungeon

Rating: mature
Tags: Main 6, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Sad, Suicide / Self Harm, Pinkie Pie
Length: 11372

Pinkie finally tells her the secret she's kept since she was a filly.

Pinkie has kept a secret since she was a filly and it's a doozy. How will her friends react and can they help her before it's too late, or will her inner demons win?

First POV Story

Published 2015-04-30 18:40:02 UTC
Last updated 2015-07-04 20:11:51 UTC

The sorrow of Freedom

The floor is hard and cold.  The ceiling is boring, except for the streamers and balloons.  They're moving slowly in the breeze coming in from the window.  Red.  Yellow.  Green.  Blue.  Purple.  What's the reason there are so many colors in the world but only a few colors of balloons and streamers?

Why are ponies all different colors.  Mom and dad. My sisters and cousins.  All grey.  Me and Granny are the only pink ones.  Why are we so different?  Granny and I were the happy ones in the family.  Almost like it was our lot in life to make others happy while the selfishness of our cutie marks doomed us to never have true happiness ourselves.

"I am sooo happy you're happy" I say all the time to everypony.  Am I really happy making others happy?  Why don't others throw parties for me?  Why don't they give me gifts?  I just want to know if I could have a different lot in life.  I got my cutie mark making my family happy, not making myself happy.

I'm gonna get up this time.  I mean it.  I have a full day of party planning to do and thankfully no parties to hold.

I rolled to my stomach and sighed as I looked at the floor I was laying on.  It was a nice floor.  Simple and with a single purpose.  Just like a pony.  Every pony.  Standing up I stretched and felt my back crack.  I don't like that feeling.  It always makes me think I've hurt myself and won't be able to work anymore.  So much to do and everything has to be done.  I'd better look into the mirror again.

"Ah, there she is.  The pink mare everypony loves but nopony truly knows.  The truth behind the lie.  Blue eyes.  Long flowing mane."

With a sigh I shook my head and put on my best smile.  I thought of the rainbow that gave me my first smile.  The light and warmth of the sun that had come out as the rainbow passed over.  The moment it happened.  Time for my sister to take over.

Pinkie? are you ready to start another day?

Oh, yeah!  Pinkamena, you're not so bad ya know.  I'm here for you if you want to talk.  I have great ears and I listen to everything!

No, I'm okay.  Do we have to do this.  Can't we just tell our secret to the ponies and be free?  Be open as we are?  Stop hiding?

Pinkamena, you know we can't do that.  They'd hurt us, you know how they feel about our kind.  Let's switch and just go about our day.  I'll be in charge and then you can take a reeealy relaxing nap!  You can rest and everything will be okay.

Just like always, Pinkie.  You have all the fun and I'm here.  Trapped.

I tap my head as I look into the mirror and end our internal diatribe.  With a deep breath I release my mind to her and she pushes me back into the recesses of my own mind to take control of my body and world.  It hurts when she does it.  She's so excited to be in charge these days.

"There she IS.  That's the Pinkie Pie everyone knows!  Look at those curlys in your mane!  Oh yeah.  Ready for the day?  You know it!"

I'm Pinkie Pie.  It's a pleasure to meet you.  I'm the mare everypony knows and loves.  I feel their love and it fills me in a way they'll never understand.  I jump and test my body like I do a dozen times everyday.  How high can I jump?    How long can I hold my breath?  Everything is in order.  Once I'm outside how fast can I run?  Time to PARTAY!  I open the door and close it softly and skip down the stairs.

"Hi Mrs. Cake!  Can I make some cupcakes and sample them out this morning?  I have it on good authority there'll be a BIG gathering in front of city hall this afternoon."

"Oh, Pinkie.  I love your enthusiasm but, not today.  Carrot is going to go there himself and we're near the end of the month.  Can't afford samples right now," she tells me.  I say it's okay and run out the door.  Looking around there are too many ponies for me to test my speed and I know it's there.  In this body I can move as fast as some can blink if not faster.  None of them can know I can teleport, but it makes life so much easier and it makes them happier.

Pinkie, is everything okay?  You feel a little sad about the cupcakes.

No, I'm super-dee-dooper.  I just wanted an excuse to see the ponies at city hall.  I'll visit the travelers before I do anything else.

With a skip in my step I head for the inn.  It's almost check out time and there are usually a few ponies here laid over since the train doesn't run after 10 and this is a stop on their trip.  I see a couple of mares and a stallion with a colt in tow leaving the inn.  Time to go to work!  I jump into a bush and teleport into one of their luggage and wiggle so they notice it.  I feel them lower the bag and hear them unzipping it. Here I go.  Limber those lips Pinkie.

"HELLO AND WELCOME TO PONYVILLE!" I shout at the stallion.  He stumbles back and gasps.  Another successful greeting.  "I'm Pinkie Pie and I'm here to welcome you to Ponyville and if you're leaving right away stop by the Cakes bakery to get some sweets to take with you, or you can go to the deli and grab a sandwich to fill your belly for your trip!  I'll see you later."  I pull the luggage closed and teleport back into the bush and jump out.  No pony saw me and if they did, I'm Pinkie.  I do 'odd things' all the time.

I missed breakfast this morning so I think an apple or two are needed.  Knowing my friend Applejack she'll be walking into town about now.  I hop back into the bush and teleport into her cart.  I was close.  She's leaving the farm.  Mmm.  Fresh apples.  She won't notice two missing so I grab them and Teleport to my safe place on the roof of a house that no pony can see up to and few Pegasus look at.  The chimney is a great place to appear next to.  Shade in the summer, warm in the winter.

I eat the apples and they are so juicy.  I lick my muzzle and take a deep breath.  I guess I should spy on my friends to see what they're up to.  Twilight first.  She'll be nose deep in a book and her dragon will be doing some menial task.  I'll go to her room under her bed.  I appear under her bed and look around.  Pages flipping.  Typical.  I crawl to the edge of the floor to peek on her.  She has a book in front of her using her fancy magic to levitate it.  Why can't unicorn just touch a book like every other creature?

I teleport behind her and pull a balloon from the pocket of space behind me and hold it behind her.  "Twilight!  What're ya doing?"  I shout and laugh inside as she jumps, dropping the book.

"Pinkie, how'd you get in here?!"  If I had a bit for every time I was asked that I could... hmm.  What would I do with them all?  Buy a new party cannon?  Maybe streamers?  I can only fit so much into a dimentional pocket and my mane and tail hair are so big, where'd I keep-  "Pinkie? Hello?  I asked what do you want?  I'm in the middle of reading this book the princess sent me on artifacts of-"

Why does she talk so much about things no pony knows or cares about?

I don't know Pinkamena, I just smile until she's done then make an excuse to leave.  I think she likes to have an ear sometimes.

I think she's a boring twit that doesn't care about others' thoughts, opinions or boredom

Shh, she's almost done.

I smile and agree blindly.  I hope she didn't ask something I have to make an excuse for.  She looks at me like I should answer her.  I'm just going to say something happy and fun then go somewhere else.  I love her energy but she's so boring.  "Okay, I've gotta party on the other side of town to get to, I'll see you later for a picnic on the hill, okay?"  She nods and smiles.  Dodged another spear on that one.  I skip out the door and close it behind me.  Where am I going to go?

It's such a boring day.  I guess I'll invite the others to a picnic and buy some cupcakes for it.

Picnic time.  I bought the cupcakes.  Eight of them.  I love cupcakes and don't gain weight so I think a little extra energy is in order.  There they are!  Oh how I love to see them.  The only ones I can be myself around.  Well, mostly.

"Heya guys!  It's super dooper to see you all made it!  It's so boring today!  I've been trying to find something to do but every ponies busy!  How've you all been?"  I ask hoping any of them will jump at the chance to talk to me.  Instead they're already talking, they smile at me but I have to wait to talk.  I think it's okay to watch the sky for a while.  I lay down and look at a cloud.  Same as always.  I imagine the clouds moving themselves and changing shapes into other things.  So relaxing.  I drift off to sleep.

Time for this lie to end.  I feel Pinkies control slip as she sleeps and I take control slowly, cautiously.  She's more dangerous then she seems.  I open my eyes and see the sky.  It's nice to be outside in my body again.  It's been so long, I think I've forgotten what the grass feels like.  I slowly sit up and crawl to my friends.  When they see me they look puzzled.

"Pinkie?  What happened to your mane and tail?  They're all, flat." Rainbow says.  I shush them and motion for them to come closer.

"My name is Pinkamena Diane Pie and Pinkie is holding me hostage."

They chuckle and look at me like I'm joking.  The feeling in my heart aches as they do that but Fluttershy believes me.  She looks at me with concern so she's the one I focus on.

"When I was a filly, I saw Rainbow Dashes sonic rainboom and it filled me with joy.  At the same time a creature was about to attack me and eat me.  It fused with me and our bodies merged.  She felt the joy inside me and fed off it like a changeling."

When I say changeling they all begin to listen.  I knew that would be the word to get their attention.

"Are you a changeling, Pinkie?" Fluttershy whispers to me.

"No," I whisper back, fear is gripping me.  How long until she wakes up and wrestles me for control?  "I'm not and she isn't either.  She's something that consumes other creatures and absorbs their abilities.  Her power of jumping was destroyed when the rainboom pushed her into me."

"What was your ability that she wanted?"  Twilight asks.  Always the scientist she focuses on facts.  That's what I need.

"I can run at almost sonic speeds without getting tired.  That's a huge ability for any creature to have.  I did it once when I was grounded for trying to hurt my mother while I was a filly.  I ran to Saddle Arabia before I got thirsty.  I spent two days there before I ran home.  Four hours both ways.  The creature was just done snacking on a changeling when it saw me run away."  They're listening to me now.  I feel so much better trusting them with this.  "If you're going to kill me, make it fast.  Please, I'm so tired.  I can't keep living a life trapped in the back of my own mind."

"Wait, so the Pinkie we know is actually-" I shush Rarity.  I can't have Pinkie wake up yet.  "So, your body is a host to a monster?"

I nod and they gasp.  I feel her stirring.  "I have to go, she's waking up.  Please, don't tell her what I told you.  Your lives are in danger if you do.  I pray you'll help me or kill me."  They look very worried as I crawl back to where she went to sleep and I close my eyes and slide back behind her in my mind.  I take one last breath of the nature around me.  A moment later she is in control again.

"Oh, boy that was a great nap!  I can't believe I was a snoozy Suzie.  I didn't snore did I?  Why're you looking at me like that?  Do I have drool on me?"  I giggle as I wipe my mouth just in case.  They're still staring at me.  I wonder what's wrong.

"Pinkie?" Applejack asks me.

"Yeah?  What's up AJ?  Did I do something?"  Applejack looks worried and over to Rainbow Dash.

"No, you were talking weird in your sleep and it was weird.  Something about eating rocks for breakfast and crunching them."

What?  I don't think I'd say that.  Maybe I did.  Sleep is a weird thing in and of itself.  "Oh, I used to eat rock candy after breakfast when I was a filly," I lie.  They look like they bought it.  Those smiles, such foolish creatures.  I must have concerned them, I sense the worry in them.  But, over rocks?  I wonder why that would be an issue.

Getting up I grab my box of cupcakes and share them with my friends.  Cupcakes always make them happy.  I eat two myself and burp.  Oh yeah, I know what a delight it is to enjoy a cupcake.  We talk for a while and they giggle at my jokes.  I like having friends like them.  My old life was never about friends, only survival.  Its thanks to Pinkamena that I have them.  I owe my life to her.  Collecting my box I bid them farewell and skip back to town where I see the Cutie Mark Crusaders walking through town.

Again they think their cutie marks will not only show up because they try something but that they'll all be identical.  Even for fillies they're stupid.  "Hi girls!  Any luck with your cutie marks?"  They look sad when I ask them that.  Good.  Stop trying to rush nature.  "It's okay, keep trying and I'll throw you the best Cutesinera you've ever known.  It'll blow the others I've done out of the water!"

Their joy is delectable.  If I was a changeling I'd fill up on their joy.  But, I'm mortal now and need real food.  I bid them farewell and skip back to the bakery.  I guess I can rest until something happens.  This is one of those days where I can sleep until tomorrow and nothing will happen.  Passing the Cakes I nod and go to my room.  I lay on the bed and count the various party stuff in my room.  Our room.  I feel myself drifting off to sleep when Pinkamena asks to be in control.

Can I have my body back to take a shower?  I haven't felt water on my body in so long and I think it's deserved.

I don't see the harm in that.

I relinquish control and feel relaxed as I have a break from a whole body.  She can't use my abilities except her running so I'm not worried.  I watch as she walks to the mirror to look at herself.  She always does the same thing.  Smiles then laments her existence.  Okay, now she's going to the shower.  I think I'm a kind enough creature.  She's so lucky to have me.  Awe, she chuckles as the water hits her body.  Looking up she lets the water fill her mouth then gargles the water and spits it out.

I spit the water out to clean my mouth from the lies she's told from it.  So many lies.  So much pain.  I look around the room for anything sharp but there isn't anything.  I sigh in defeat and return to grab a scrubber and begin to clean my coat.  This feels nice.  I miss the feeling of cleaning myself.  Maybe I can drink the soap.  No, vomit once and have a stomach ache.  Then I won't be allowed to have control for weeks, maybe longer.

Wait.  The mirror.  I see it.

Can I look at myself in the mirror, Pinkie?  I want to know what I look like while I'm washing.

That seems fair.  I enjoy seeing myself often in many ways too. It should be a great sight for you.

I walk from the shower to the mirror and hop up to the counter and wipe the steam from the mirror and see myself.  Her smile isn't here.  I like seeing the real me.  I rub my cheeks and then punch the mirror shattering it.

What are you DOING? she shouts at me.

I can't look at myself right now.  I'm sorry.

I shut my eyes and grab for any piece of mirror I can.

Then don't break the damn mirror, just close your eyes.  Now open them and wash yourself then get back to the room.  I'm going to be in control for a couple days to teach you a lesson.

Feeling a large piece of glass I slit my wrists and begin to stab myself in the stomach and chest.  The chance at freedom stops me from crying out in pain.  I open my eyes and show her what I'm doing as I laugh out loud.  "I win.  I have my freedom now."  She grabs my mind and tugs at it trying to get control.  I hold on with all I have and cut myself on the foreleg all the way down the side and scream as the pain and her mental pull takes over.  She collapses to her knees as she begins to gasp for air and from the pain.

Blood is pouring from my wounds and it sounds like a stabbed a lung.  I see her cough blood and I laugh at from inside my prison.  I don't have anything to say.  I just wait for the darkness to take hold of me finally.  As she falls to the floor screaming her last I see her eyes close.  Freedom.  Finally I'm free.

To be continued

Pain of Regret

Oh, what happened?  Why am I in so much pain?  I slowly open my eyes and the light above me makes me shut them again tightly.  I hear Spike next to me shout something but my ears are ringing slightly.  I guess I'm in the library, might as well get this over with.  I open my eyes again but I see a white ceiling.  Why is there a white ceiling in the library?  I turn my head to Spike to see the look of worry on his face.  "What's-"  It hurts so much to talk.  I can feel myself wince from the pain.  Pain never stopped me before.

"Where am I?  What happened?"  I choke out.

"Y-you're awake?  Oh thank Celestia.  The others will be here in a few minutes.  How do you feel?"  I smile at him.  I can feel how weak I am, but it's a smile.  He looks a little reassured.  I decide to keep my eyes on him while he stares at me with those cat like dragon eyes.  Why don't I get a cat? I like them.  They're cuddly and like to lay around a lot.  An easy pet.

A moment later there's a bright purple light from somewhere behind me.  Twilight must have teleported in.  Just please don't let her hug me.  "Oh, thank Celestia.  Dear, how are you feeling?  You look so pretty, Pinkamena.  Please, can you answer me?"  It's Rarity.  She's behind me and I guess they all came with Twilight.  I see Rainbow Dash and Applejack coming into by view just at the foot of my bed.  This bed is uncomfortable, but it's warm.  Must be magic because only my nose is cold.

I turn my head back to look at the ceiling and I see they're all here from the corners of my eyes.  They're standing around me.  I like the warmth they're giving off, it makes me feel happy and a little better.  I lift my right foreleg to wave but I can't move it, it hurts, throbbing when I move it.  I feel like my other legs are tied down.  Taking a deep breath hurts too.  A lot.  "What happened?  Fluttershy, where are you?"

"I'm right here, Pinkamena."  How does she know it's me?  "Can you tell us anything about what happened?"

I smile as I remember what I did, the memories slowly coming back.  "I-I tried to free myself.  I guess I'm not going to see you again once she wakes up.  I'll say I love what you have done for me over the years and that you believed me when I confessed to you."

I hear them gasp and I feel a hoof on my side and a gasp in pain.

"Don't touch her!" one of them hisses to whoever touched me.  They care about me still, even after what I tried to do.  True friends.  I'm glad to finally talk to them with my own voice in control of my own body, even if it's going to be for only a few minutes.  To feel the air against my coat and the smell of a sterile hospital room is almost cathartic.

"Why didn't I die?" I ask the ceiling.  Waiting for Celestia to answer.  Instead I get her student.

"Mrs. Cake heard screaming from the bathroom like she had never heard, she said.  She called for help and a Pegasus got a doctor to you as soon as she could.  He was able to put you into stasis while you were transported to the hospital.  You've been asleep for four days, Pinkamena.  We're so glad you lived.  The doctors said you were the worst," she stopped talking.  Thank Celestia.  I'm so tired of hearing her ramble over all these years.  The unicorn that just can't shut up.  Twilight Ramble I called her once.  It was a great laugh Pinkie and I shared out loud in her dumb unicorn face.  "-Suicide they'd ever seen."

Suicide they call it?  I can hear some sobbing from both sides but I'm not moving.  "Miss Pie, you're awake finally."  A stallion.  He sounds official.  I don't smile.  Why lie?  That's her job.  I force a cough to let him know I'm awake, Celestia that hurts.  I see him walk into my view and lean over me.  A yellow unicorn and his horn is glowing.  I can feel magic washing over me.  "Well, I can see she's healing nicely.  Her external wounds have closed and scarring in low.  Also, most of her internal injuries have begun repairing themselves.

Whatever parasite she has in her has impressive healing abilities."   Great.  They told him.

"Are you going to kill us now?"  I ask the ceiling.  I can hear the doctor groan.  "I have a right to die if I am in pain that can't be stopped."

"Miss Pie, I hear your concerns and thought but you a parasite inside you.  We found where it is and we can neither identify or remove it without removing a large part of your brain.  I'm afraid you are going to have to find a way to live with it."  I sneer and look at him with hate in my eyes and I hear Rarity gasp.

"I've lived with this bucking thing since I was a filly.  She's taken over my body for years and feasted of the emotions of my friends and neighbors and townspeople.  Any moment she'll wake up and rip me from my body and lock me in the prison in the back of my mind for months this time.  You have NO," I cough violently.  It hurts so much I feel tears leaving my eyes.  When I finally stop coughing I lay my head back on my pillow and continue.  "Right to tell me to live with it.  You don't have any idea what it's like.  Watching through your eyes as another controls you for hours, days at a time.  Screaming as they do horrible things to others to taste the suffering then dancing an hour later at a party to feast on the joy of others."  I'm growling now.  I feel my teeth chattering with rage I've only felt but couldn't express.  This isn't the Pinkie Pie they know and it's scaring them.  I can smell it.

"Miss Pie?  Are you saying your parasite has hurt others?  Would you care to talk about it?"  Talk about it?  He asks like it's just a question he asks every patient.  I hear crying by my sides.  They care and I can- I can taste it.  It's a different sensation.  It's bland and kind of salty.  I close my eyes and take a breath in.

"She's killed a few ponies to taste their agony and fear.  She would lure them into the Ever Free and then tie them to a tree.  She'd-"  Why is it so hard to talk about this?  I lived through it a dozen times.  "I closed my eyes while she did it.  I opened them to see if it was over but I saw it.  I saw them.  Their insides, were on the ground as they screamed for help.  She would laugh and pull out pieces of them until they stopped then she'd leave them for the timberwolves."  I close my eyes and sigh.  "She can't live off the emotions of others since she fused with me.  She needs food like we do.  But, it's still a sensation she enjoys."

It feels so sad saying that out loud.  Now I'm an accessory to murder.  I hear all of them crying while the doctor scans me again.  Damn magic users.  "I'll be killed anyway, just do it now.  Please.  Before she wakes up or before I'm imprisoned by the royal guards,"  I plead.  I'm not crying or angry now.  I feel myself getting tired again.  Very tired.   I can't stay awake much longer and they can tell.

"Miss Pie," I hate being called that, "I'll do what I can to help you."

     "Help me?   End my suffering then," I gasp as I feel her stirring inside.  "I'm so scared, girls.  I only have a moment before she takes over.  Please, try to convince her you don't know about me.  I can't be locked away again. "  I'm crying.  Like a filly I'm crying and pleading as they begin to cry heavier.   The doctor is the only one with any sense and rushes them all out of the room, closing the door.   Only he and Fluttershy stay.   She was overlooked.   Typical.   "I'm going to sleep.   When she's here, act like she just woke up.  Please, I-"  before they can say anything I lay my head back and close my eyes.   She's gaining control of herself.   I still. Have a moment.   I slip her into control and hide in the back of my mind and go to sleep.

Oh, it hurts.   I survived by screaming until that fool baker came in.   I love how scared she was when she saw me.  She was all "AAHH"  And I giggled and passed out.   Darn Pinkamena for trying that.   She's still sleeping like a foal.  Awww, she's so cute when she's asleep like that.  I don't want to wake her, she needs her rest.  I think a week should do.  I lived and thank goodness for that.

I open my eyes and feel the worry leaving someone in the room.   "Fluttershy?  I'm so glad you're here. "  She's jumps up on the bed to look at me and I see worry in her eyes.   She's so nice.  So sweet.  Her taste is unique among all other ponies, but I really do like her.   I see a doctor walking to me.   What's going to happen next?   I'm hurt bad, I know it.   My healing is very good but it'll still take a while to close my insides.  "How long was I Sleepy Suzy?  I feel like I get hit by a cake made out of  bricks covered with yummy chocolate icing and a cherry on top but it's a green cherry, not red."

"Miss pinkie pie? "

"Yups, that's me!   I smile as wide as I can and breathe deep to say something before I feel a sting in my chest and cough roughly.   Damn bitch cut a lung.  "I-I'm okay.  I fell on some glass and rolled over to get up and fell again then called for help.  I'm such a clutz!"  I smile and lift my head from the pillow and feel their conflicting emotions.  They don't believe me.  I understand why, falling onto glass several times is more than a silly filly like me can do, even on my best worst day.

"Doctor, can I go home?  I want a cupcake?"  I really do want one.  I love those tasty little things.  Oh, I'm drooling, haha!"  "I really want one with extra icing and to be blueberry and have extra yummy sprinkles with some syrup on top."  I feel them getting happy.  This entire species loves those stupid yummy things.

"Miss Pie, I'm sorry but you'll have to wait to have anything that isn't approved.  You're healing surprisingly fast and you may be out of here in two weeks.  Until then it's rest.  So, I'm going to take Fluttershy out and leave you be, okay?"

"Awe, really?  Fluttershy can't stay and play bingo or hide and seek or hooves up hooves down, or-"

"No, you need rest.  Don't even try to leave that bed."  Darn doctors telling me what to do like bossy-pants'.

"Fine, I'll wait for the next meal, I'm so hungry.  Can I have peas and carrots and-"

"You'll be on a liquid diet for the next couple days until your stomach recovers a little more.  I'll come back shortly, I have paperwork to file and let another doctor know you're awake.  Good day.  If you have any issues press the button by your left hoof."

I look down and gasp.  I'm strapped down.  All my limbs except my right foreleg.  It's cut from the shoulder to the hoof and blood is seeping through the bandages.  "Eeew."  I look at the doctor who's let Fluttershy out.  He's looking at me.  He knows I lied.  Darn, now I have to find some way to cover that lie, so many lies, don't get 'em mixed up like batter!

Alone in the room I have nothing to do and I can't move my right foreleg.  She cut too deep, I may not be able to heal it.  I can chop chop chop it off and try to grow a new one like a flower, but that'll take time and I think it'd be *pretty** obvious.  So, I get to sit here bored and alone.  Pinkamena's asleep and snoozing and I can't use my abilities... Or, can I?  I concentrate and feel myself charging my teleport.  I'm so excited where can I go first?  I don't have anywhere to go that's safe right now.  Even my old homes can't keep me alive until I'm done healing.  What I *can do is teleport above this dumb bed and fall back with all my limbs free and sneak a cupcake from my back pocket.

I do just that and regret it direly.  The pain from falling four inches onto a soft mattress sent pain through my body like I haven't known since I was created.  My insides were all burny and stingy and I felt all sick faster than I ever had before.  I could taste blood in the back of my mouth.  My blood.  It's disgusting.  No wonder these creatures are vegetarians, they taste disgusting like a cow-pie.  Those aren't really pies.  The doctor and three nurses run in and surround me holding me down and re-strap me to the bed.  I can't fight.  I'm not strong enough.  I was silly to try to get out.  I hate it when I'm wrong.  I fall asleep again from the ouchy pain.

"Pinkie?  Are you okay now?"  That's Twilights voice.  I am so happy to hear her.  I open my eyes all slow and blink a lot then turn to look at her and I smile so big she smiles too.  Yummy.

"Twilight?  I'm so happy to see you.  I'd give you a balloon but I'm tied down and I can't move good yet,"  I move my legs and notice my forelegs are free.  I smile big and look down.  I'm not tied down and my arm is all not bleeding anymore.  "I feel a lot better and I think I want a party.  Look, what's that?!"  Silly Twilight turns away and I reach behind me and pull out a bunch of balloons and a hoof full of confetti and throw them all at her.  Her face is so surprised it's making me laugh.

"How did you do that Pinkie?"  I laugh and sit up.  It doesn't hurt so bad this time.  YAY healing powers.  And another bit for my imagination jar.  I must be up to 13,476 bits by now.  Not too bad for such a young mare, if I say so.  I giggle and whisper.

"It's a secret," I like when she scowls at me.  Her eyes look silly and her forehead gets all wrinkly around her horn like a old stallion eating an ice cream cone.  "So, can I go home now?"  I ask knowing she'll say no.  But, I'm better enough to know I can leave whenever I want.  Oh no, she's explaining something again.  I wonder how many squares there are in all the windows in Ponyville.  Let's see, 86 houses and about 6 windows each and each window has those wood things that make the squares so that makes, like, a lot.  So, there are a lot of windows in Ponyville.  I think there are 86 houses.  That was kind of a guess.  That doesn't really include apartments or basements or shops or-"

"Pinkie?  I asked you how you feel.  You're looking sick again, do you feel sick?"  Do I?  Hmm, tongue, what do YOU think?  Nope, feels okay.  Wiggle my nose and breathe in and out.

"Nopers!  I'm as fit as a fiddle.  Or is it a harmonica?  I think a harmonica sounds better than a fiddle plus you can hold it in your hooves and blow into it like this," I raspberry like I was using a harmonica spitting on Twilights face.  She moves back and shakes her head like a puppy.  Silly filly.  She looks upset then says she needs a cloth and leaves.  Perfect!  I can get out of here.  I teleport to my favorite spot in town.  The roof by the chimney.  It's warm and nice out.  It feels so nice to be out.  I sit up and look at my body and pull the bandages off and throw them down the chimney.  I lay in the shadow of the chimney.

My arm has a scar all the down, what'll I tell ponies?  Haha, I had a party cannon accident.  They'll believe anything.

Pinkie?

"Oh, you're awake Pinkamena.  It's so nice to hear you're awake.  I was scared as that time I saw a hydra in the Everfree forest.  Remember that time?"

Yes I do.  You switched with me and left me paralyzed with fear until we were pulled away, then you ripped me back and took over again.

"Yeah, that was a great joke, right?"

If you think that's funny you're really as crazy as I think you are.

"Now, Pinkamena.  Don't use insults like that, if you hurt my feelings I'll ignore you again.  Do you want that?"

... No.  Please, don't leave me alone again.  I'll-I'll be good.  Can we get some food?  Can I taste some food, please Pinkie?  I haven't tasted food for so many years.  You always eat the good stuff and leave me water.  I, please.  You know you're more powerful then me.  Just an apple.  A cup of cider... Please.

I think for a minute about Pinkamenas pleas.  Should I or no?

"Pinkamena.  Shut up."

W-what?

"It's your fault we missed a dozen just for fun parties and two Cutecineras and a birthday and THREE welcome to Ponyville parties.  You're on time out.  Go to your room.  I'll tell you when you can come out.  Think about what you've done, Pinkamena."

Pinkie, please no.  NO!!!

Her screaming is loud and I can feel my brain hurting.  I concentrate and push her into the prison I made for her.  She can't do anything in there but watch and listen to the world through my eyes and ears.  That'll quiet her mean mouth and hurty hooves.  Now, I have a lot of fun to catch up on and my tummy wants a cupcake!

Feelings of Power

Three days ago I left the hospital and I've been hiding from my best friends super good.  They think showing up at a party will catch me.  I just hide anywhere and poof.  I'm gone.  They gave up and started having 'secret' times so I'm gonna sneak a listen like a super secret spy that never gets seen.  Whoosh.  I'm like that but I'm not really a secret spy, I'm Pinkie in a black unitard.  That's a fun word;  unitard.  UnItArD.  UniTard.  UNItard.  I appear under Twilights bed and crawl to the edge again to spy all sneaky.

"Rainbow, we have to take this seriously.  Pinkie's been avoiding us since she disappeared from the hospital and I'm really worried."

"Twilight, I know you lost her but how's that MY fault?"

"Rainbow, now don't ya get all huffy bout Twi when we're all worried.  I for one can't wait ta find her and ask her a couple a questions."

"Oh, this is going no where." Rarity.  Always a negative Nancy.  "I believe if we throw our own party she'll show up and we can talk with her about the problem."

"But, is there a real problem?  I mean, she seems happy as Pinkie.  I don't know if Pinkamena is really as bad off."

*PINKAMENA?  That dirty lying bitch?!  I'll tear her mind apart one strand at a time.  I knew I was too kind to have her live with me in this body.*  I growl loudly.  Too loudly and they look up too see me bearing my teeth like the beast I was.  No more miss nice consumer.

"When did she talk to you?"  I shout.  Her voice is so shrill.  I regret that sometimes.  "How long ago and what did she say?"

They gasp as I look at them.  I taste the fear from them.  I don't care, this is my life that's at risk now.  Suffering in this form is bad enough but now to have it at risk, I'll kill them all if I have to.  "Pinkie, I don't know what to tell you..."  Damn Twilight.  I'm going to stab her with her own horn soon.

"Shut up you annoying bitch.  Even Pinkamena's tired of your rambling.  How many ponies do you think care about you talking so much?  NONE.  You're going to answer me.  What did she tell you?"  I smile with Pinkies best smile and widest eyes.  I feel terror.  I taste it.  It's divine, oh, to be a changeling would be so nice right now.  I see them backing up.  "Oh buck this, who's going to answer me?  Will it be you, Rarity?  Rainbow Dash?  ... Applejack?  Whoever tells me first won't be hurt!"  I offer.  I think that's very fair.  Rainbow is hovering in the air like that's safe.  The earth ponies are grouped together and the Unicorns are at the front.

I sigh.  "I haven't had to hurt a pony for a long time and I wish I wouldn't have to now.  Please, just tell me what she told you and what you're planning to do to me."  No answer.  Great.  I have to make an example.  I always liked Rainbow Dash, she's the best prankster besides me.  Fluttershy, I can't hurt her, she's my best real friend.  Rarity makes me nice clothes and I really like the ones with real candy on it because I get to snack when I get hungry."  I look at Applejack and smile.  I giggle and teleport under her and peek at her and say 'Boo."

She jumps back and I teleport behind Twilight while everyone's looking at Applejack and I punch her right at the base of her stupid horn.  She screams and falls to the floor as I run back up the stairs and look down at them again.  "That's one, who's going to tell me?"

"Pinkie, dear?  I think you're overreacting over such a trivial matter, you don't need to harm us."

"Then tell me," I demand.  No more cuteness in my voice.  I speak like I have to.  "If you don't I'll hurt somepony else next.  Worse."  THey cower in fear and Rainbow tries to get to the door.  What a foolish Pegasus.  I run to the door and stand in front of it, she screams at me appearing there and stops.  I let a giggle leave my lips as I teleport behind her and buck her at the base of her wings.  I run to the top of the stairs again as she begins to shout and slams into the door, chest first.

"No pony is leaving.  I think I want to have some fun, who wants to play a game?"  None of them answer.  Fluttershy and Applejack are trying to console Rainbow Dash.  Looks like her wings are seriously damaged.  I think I broke the bones.  I laugh and point at Rainbow.  "If you're the best at everything, maybe you're the best a crying too.  Waa-waa baby, waa-waa."  I start dancing in place and teasing her but she's crying to loud to hear me.  It's not funny if she's not gonna laugh with me.

"Pinkie, why're you doing this to us?!"  Oh, Applejack.  She thinks she's the best at everything too.  I wonder how good she'll be when I break her rear leg.

Pinkie.

"Pinkamena?  What the buck are you- How are you out of your prison?!"  Ugh, I feel her fighting me for control... How?  How is she doing this?  She's stronger than she was before.  Maybe the injuries?

I woke up while you were asleep and- "Twilight gave me strength to fight you."

"How are you talking?  You're supposed to be locked in your mental prison.  No mage can break a mental prison."

"No, but I can.  She cast a spell that gave me more control of my body by helping me focus our mind.  My mind."

"You aren't in any place to challenge me, Pinkamena.  I'll kill your best friends in front of you!"  The girls gasp and Rarity, the coward, begins to cry.

"They're our friends.  Hurting them will hurt us both.  They're your first friends since Discord made you, do you really want to lose them?"  The girls gasp at hearing my creators name.  Rainbow still lays crying by the door trying to touch her broken wings.  Egomaniac.

"I'll make new ones!"  I run straight for Twilight before she can blink and buck her horn twice snapping it in the middle.  I turn to see the look of pain and confusion on her face and I look around to see the others panic.  Her horn is only a foot away from her head before I run to Applejack and aim for her left back leg.

Stop.

I freeze in place and can't move.

I have control.  Finally I have control of my own body at my own free will.  Pinkie wrestles me and almost wins for a moment as I revel in the joy of having my hooves on the ground.  Twilight is throwing up behind me and the others have backed up encircling me.  "Girls, it's me.  Pinkamena.  I need your help.  I-I can control my body and I feel her powers, but I don't know what'll happen.  I won't try to move yet but she can teleport.  Where can I go that'll kill us?"

"Pinkamena?  I can't let you die, or Pinkie.  You're my friend."

"Darn it, Fluttershy.  She'll kill you all.  You see what she just did and what she was going to do!"

"P-i-n-k-a-m-e-n-a."  She's trying to talk through my mouth.  Concentrate.  Fight her.  For your friends.  FOR YOUR FRIENDS.

"NO!  You go to prison you monster."  I force her back into the recesses of my mind and feel my head throbbing with pain as she tried to do as much damage as she could on her way.  I think I've forgotten something, but I don't know what.  "Girls, I won.  Thanks to you, I beat her!"  I fall to the floor and feel my knees sting from the strike.  I giggle and hear my voice, Pinkies voice.  I feel odd.  I taste things.  I can't describe them.  I look at the mares around me, they're slowly moving together and around Rainbow Dash.  Even Twilight has hobbled over.  The scent of vomit is slowly wafting at me.

"What do I do?  I've never had complete control of my body.  I feel her powers.  I feel and taste your emotions.  I-I can see... Oh, I can see so much.  Can't you see it?"  What I see can't be described easily.  "I see- I see the magic.  I see the magic flowing through you all and where its going.  Our cutie marks.  Oh, oh my.  The cutie marks... They're channeling it into us all.  I wish you could see this.  It's beautiful."  I sit back and look around the room.  Swirling arcane energies fill the walls and ponies.  I see it circling around me but not touching me.  I wave my legs around and watch it disrupt but not stop its flow.  My legs.  They're not glowing, it's swirling with blackness.

"Twilight, why am I the only one swirling with black?  You all have beautiful colors but I'm black and grey."  Twilight winces but looks at me with one eye half open.

"That's dark magic.  You said she was made by Discord, it's probably chaos magic-"

"Okay, stop.  I get it.  Please, don't talk anymore."  Twilight scoffs while I feel amusement from the others. They feel the same way we do.  I do.  "I'm going to stand up."  Standing I use too much energy and jump to the ceiling and hit my head.  Flailing like a falling streamer I gasp and hold my breath stopping inches from the floor.  "So, that's how she did that!  Wait, I'm not breathing...  But I'm talking.  How can that be?"

The other mares look at each other and shrug.  Useless, all of them.  What else can I do?  I move carefully and breathe out slowly and float to the floor.  "That was so cool!  Oh, Rainbow?  I'm so sorry-"  I just teleported?  I'm outside the library door.  Should I knock?  I think I don't want to teleport in just yet.  I knock politely.  Applejack cautiously opens the door and they all look at me.  This is the weirdest I've ever felt.

"Look at me!  I'm outside!  I was JUST inside and now I'm here!" I look at them and breathe in through my nose and I see something new.  I see colors from them.  "I see your smell.  I see your feelings.  This is how Changelings see, I think.  Twilight, if you could see what I do right now you'd spend a year documenting everything.  Shh before you start."  Their colors change and I see amusement.  It smells and tastes sweet like lemon drop candy.  "Mmm, I like that."

"Pinkamena!  Are you tasting us?"  Rarity exclaims.  I nod with a peaceful smile and exhale with my eyes closed I turn my face to the sky.

"Best thing I've tasted in years.  I sound like a changeling.  I need help.  This isn't right, ponies shouldn't know what this is like."  I open my eyes and look at them.  Rainbow is laying on her belly glaring at me and the others are repulsed at me.  I taste bitter coffee.  "I ask for help and you hate me?  I save your lives and recover my own and you hate me?  Fine.  I'll fix this myself."  Before Twilight can ramble something I teleport away.  I moved two blocks away.  It's enough.

I know only one place to hide.  I focus and teleport to the bakery.  The Cakes yelp as I appear in the kitchen.  I look at them then trot happily to the display case just through the doors and begin eating desserts like a starving giant.  The Cakes yell at me to stop but I ignore them.  I haven't tasted food for years.  This is divine.  Sweet and the colors of frosting.  No wonder she never shared.

I stop eating and with a mouth full of cake I run upstairs at fell speed hearing windows crack below me as I enter my room.  I go to my bed and lift the mattress...  My bits.  My savings.  I run slower back downstairs and drop it on the counter then go back to eating.  I ate so much I could barely move.  I started to feel sleepy and yawned with the biggest smile and tastiest meal I've ever had.  I trot to the living room and lay on the couch and fall asleep with the biggest smile I've ever had. Well, since that day anyway.

Next chapter soon!

Cruel Game

     It's been three months since I got my body back.   I've been wandering equstria just trying to find my place.   Many think I'm the pink party pony, Pinkie Pie.  I have to convince them I'm not then look at their sad expressions.   I've learned to control the changeling powers of taste, finally.  Tasting everyponies feelings was getting annoying and confused me for when I was really hungry or eating.

I learned I can transform if I need to, but it hurt so bad I almost passed out when I tried it.  She must have a higher pain threshold than I can imagine.   I haven't felt or heard Pinkie since that day so, I guess she's really locked away.  If only I had done better before I ran away from Ponyville.  I ran from my friends, the Cakes.  The entire life I knew is gone now and I have to start over.  I can't throw parties or do crazy things like pinkie.  She has, had, more energy than I ever could.

Pinkamena Diane pie.  Worthless pony at large.

I've been to every major city just to see them.  Cities are grand and beautiful and to feel the ground beneath my own hooves.   The sounds of the cities and smells of the air is refreshing and I feel alive.  I smile more now.  My own smile.  On my own face.  I'm tired of traveling.  Maybe I can go home to the farm.   Mom and dad will be pleased to see me.  They may even smile a little.   I think I'll do that.

I'm laying in my old bed in my old room in my old house on this old farm.  Then it began, again.

Pinkamena?  Wake up sleepy head, raise up from the bed!

"Pinkie?"  I shout.  I still have my body.  "What do you want? How did you get out?"

I've watched quietly for the past few days.  I wanted to see the old farm.   It really is kinda, really, not super exciting.  This place needs a party!

"Then go back to your room to plan it and never come out again."

Oh, I might,"  she giggles...

"What are you'll laughing for?  You don't have my body anymore so all you can do is try to annoy me."  I feel chills through my body.

I had fun last night while you were sleeping.

"What?!  You took my body again?   How?  Why not keep it and run away?   You could have just locked me up again.   What's the game this time pinkie?"

Oh, no game.   Well, I guess it's like hide and seek, so a little game.  It'll be FUN!

"I'm not playing."

Mom and dad wish you would.

I sit up and look around my old room.  There should be the sound and smell of breakfast cooking.   It's too quiet.  What did she do?  I jump from bed and open my door to silence.   It's eerily quiet. I trot slowly to my parents room and freeze.   Blood.   Pooling under the door.   Oh Celestia, no.

Why wait?  Just open the door and the game will begin.  I hesitate while I hear Pinkie giggle.  Slowly I grab the knob in my mouth and turn the handle.  I push it open slowly and feel resistance.  "Oh Celestia, no.  Please no."  Pushing the door enough to slide in; the room is almost pitch black.  The sun is rising but the windows are covered and no light is getting in.  I breathe in and don't smell anything.  I turn on my Changeling senses and nothing shows.  If one or both of them are dead...  I won't know until I see them.

I choke on the thought as I feel behind the door.  There isn't anything.  What was the resistance?  Where's the blood from?  "Damn you, Pinkie."  I say through my clenched teeth.  "Damn you for playing me like this."  She doesn't respond.  Only complete silence surrounds me.  I'm feeling uneasy.  She should be giggling, gloating or ... something.  My ears turn trying to find anything but all I hear is my breath quickening.  I should get out.

I feel a drip on my nose.  I can't see.  I need to turn on some light.  I know where their lantern is; parents are creatures of habit.  I feel a drip on my neck as I turn.  I freeze again, listening.  Silence.  My breathing is getting deeper, I need to stay calm.  This is Pinkies game and I'm going to win.  Find mom and dad and get them out.  Then I run as far away as I can away from everything.  It's the only way to keep my loved ones safe.

I move and hear a drip sound.  "What is that?"  I whisper.  Nothing.  That damned silence is too bucking much.  I feel for the lantern and bump into something.  It's not a table or bed.  It's soft though.  Could be the quilt mom made for dad before I left.  I can't feel the lantern much less matches, I have to go out and get the one from my room.  As I walk out the dim light of the dawn is filtering in through the windows.  I breathe in and sigh.  I go to my room and light my lantern and look at my nose.

"Red?"  RED?  I feel my pulse start to race and my breath catching pace.  No, it's a trick.  She wouldn't do something like that.

I grab the lantern and go back to my parents room.  "Mommy? Daddy?"  I can hardly enter.  What could she have done to them?  What horrors await me inside their room?  I walk back into the room, lantern trembling between my teeth as I clench my eyes shut.  "Dear Celestia, please."

I open my eyes quickly to get it over with, like taking a band-aid off quickly so it won't hurt as much.  Lies.  The terror fills my heart as my eyes adjust to the room.  I gasp and drop the lantern and feel myself start to tremble.

"Damn you, Pinkie."  She giggles psychotically.

Everything is as it should be in the room except quilts nailed over the window.  There's a paint buck wrapped in the damned quilt hanging from the ceiling dripping BUCKING wet paint.  "PINKIE!?"  Her giggling is drowning out the ambient noise I hear around me.  I pick up the lantern and pull the door open.  Bad choice as the blanket lets loose the bucket and it falls to the floor splattering red paint across the room.  The lantern falls to the floor as my mouth hangs open. "Mom is gonna kill us..."

If you can find her before it's too late.

"Too late?  What did you DO?!?  PINKIE?  Answer me!"  Another silence.  Great, another round of silence.  Where to next?  I walk down the hall.  I don't know where to go.  I listen for any noise and the silence is my reward.  The swaying lantern casts shadows as I walk and I imagine my parents tied up hurting somewhere.  The attic?  The basement?  Hell, back in Ponyville?  I gasp.  A noise.  Something.

"H-hello?"  I ask the silence.  Like it'll answer and tell me everything I need to know.  I brush my flat flowing mane from my face and move my head around stretching my neck.  I feel a crack.  This is it.  I broke my neck.  I'm going to be paralyzed at my back half and-  I'm moving fine.  Damn phobia of breaking my neck or back.  I don't like that feeling.  It always makes me think I've hurt myself and won't be able to work anymore.

I take a breath in and hold it.  I walk toward the noise and exhale.  The noise comes again.  It's so familiar.  The door is closed so I open it.  Locked.  Seriously?  "Of all the dumb ways to try to keep me out you're going to lock a door?"  I turn and buck it, breaking the lock and part of the frame.  The room is just a normal guest room with a toy doll on the bed.  It chirps at me, I remember it.  It was Maud's back when we were fillies and she named it Stone.  It chirped every morning as the sun rose.  Magic.

I leave the room.  "This is getting boring.  Is the game to BORE me to death."  I leave the lantern and run downstairs.  The sun is brighter down here on the main floor.  More windows and that also means less places to hide.  I listen and look around for anything.  I hear a whimper.  Yes, that's what I needed to hear, no.  It wasn't.  I feel fear gripping me as I run to the basement door and buck it open knocking the door down the stairs.  "Daddy?"  I call into the dark basement.  The scent of mold and dirt fill my nose as I quickly descend the stairs and listen again.  Pitch blackness.  Damn it again.  That stupid lantern.

I don't need it, I have to find daddy.  "Daddy?" I whisper moving deeper into the abyss.  The light from upstairs is all that I can see and it only goes a few steps down so I'm on my own.  Shoot, I jammed my leg.  Ah!  Again.  What the heck, spider webs?!  Ick?   Eww, muddy sludge.  "Seriously, Pinkie.  Can't we stop this stupid game.  I'm getting all messy and... I don't think this is a game.  I think it's just a dream.  I'll wake myself up.  Watch."  I run into the darkness, trip and feel several things fall on me as crashing and rumbling echo through the room.

I guess I'm awake and my back hurts.  I'm getting the buck out of here.  I do my best to get out of the dark mess I've made and go upstairs.  I see myself in the light and I'm, filthy.  I have black goop in my fur and mud all across my legs from the knees to my hooves.  Nails and bolts are stuck to me too.

I shake them off the best I can and run around the corner.  I saw something.  What was it?  I run into it and scream as it covers me, surrounds me and encloses me.  I feel my breath as I pant in fear then stop struggling.  It's a curtain. Hanging in the middle of the side doorway.  I hear Pinkie giggle again.

"Are you just going to prank me all morning or are you going to give me a hint on what you did to my parents?" I shout into the kitchen.

You don't need to yell, I'm right here, silly filly.  If you wanted a hint all you had to do was ask.  Where does daddy... *Kill the chickens.***

I feel my blood run cold.  The barn.  It's full of sharp weapons and tools from a lifetime of breaking rocks and being a reservist in the military.  My daddy was always proud of what he had accomplished in his youth and had stories of what each was used for.  Always training stories but he spoke of them as though he'd taken them into battle.

I gallop out of the house and to the barn as fast as I can.  I hear windows shattering and things breaking as I leave the house as the shock wave follows me.  I run into the barn and shout.  "MOMMY?  DADDY??"

"Pinkamena?"  It's moms voice.

"Thank Celestia.  Are you okay?  Where are you?"

"Pinkamena?  Is it over?  Is it okay to come out?"

"What do you mean, mommy?  Where are you?  Everything's okay."  Mommy opens a door in the floor at the far side of the barn then she and daddy come out.  I run to them and embrace them into a hug that I never want to end.  "I'm so glad you're okay, mommy.  Daddy.  I was so worried when I couldn't find you."

"Find us?  Pinkamena Diane Pie!  You told us there was a twister coming and to get to the cellar.  If ya were trying to fool us so you could get that welcome home cake I made all to yourself, you're in big trouble.   Ya whippersnapper."

"Cake?  No, mommy.  I woke up and couldn't find you so I looked all over the house and you weren't there and..."   Shit.

I hear Pinkie giggling like a crazy mare again.

"And what, Pinkamena?"  Father asks.  I let them go from the hug and sit a few paces between us and hang my head.

"I looked around the house to find you."

"Well, let's go back and discuss your punishment, young mare.  Twisters aren't something we find funny out here."  No crap, mother.  A dirt devil full of rocks can strip flesh from even the best pony out here.

"PINKAMENA"  Well, I'm dead.  I tracked mud and threw black stuff and nails across the kitchen and ground floor.  Broke into my sisters room and ... oh Luna save me, spilt red paint across my parent room.  It looks like i tried to clean it up with their favorite quilt.  After I've been yelled at and beaten by both my parents I'm kicked out of the house.  I can't even collect what little I had to travel with from my room.  I'm broke and homeless.

Wasn't that game great?!

"What.  The.  TARTARUS PINKIE?!  You got us kicked out of home.  It'll take hours for them to clean and fix most of the mess.  They haven't even seen the basement yet.  What?  Wha-?  I can't even think right now!?"  I'm shouting at a rock imagining it's her and her poofy fake hair and that smile and wide eyes.  I wish I could punch her in the face.

The game was command and control!  When you fell asleep it was a LOTTA work but I got control for a little while.  Well, it was like, an hour before you woke up, but I was able to set all that up.  The lesson is easy!

"Lesson?  What the buck could I learn from you after that?!"

She giggles again in that cheerful voice.  I control your entire life.  You can't run or hide from me.  I'll get some day and it'll be so much fun to get out of this prison and be free again.  Hey!  Can we get a cake?  Oh, wait.  I ate the cake earlier.  You've gotta burp, it was soooooooo good I ate it in two bites and even wrote a thank you letter.  It was so yummy.

I feel my heart sink and I wonder if it'll fall out of my body.  She ate my cake.  She destroyed my parents' things and made a mess, then, got me kicked out of my own family house.  "You win, Pinkie."

Dire Choice

Pinkamena, we're going back to Ponyville.  I have some parties to plan and I'm going to need your body.

"Okay, Pinkie."

When we get there I'll let you see Fluttershy!  Isn't that nice of me?  I'm such a generous host.  I should be named Pinkie 'the generous host party' Pie.

"Yes, Pinkie."  I'm walking back to Ponyville.  I have no reason to rush this, I have enough food in my saddle bags to last me the trip.  I'm so tired of the fighting inside me that I'm willing to do the unthinkable.  I'm going to talk to Twilight and ask her for help and listen to her science.

I look around town and the ponies are down since I left and they are so excited to see me.  They think I'm Pinkie.  They smile and shout her name excitedly and before I know it dozens of ponies are looking at me expecting something fun.  I guess I'll humor them the best I can, they are expecting something.  I smile as big as I can and spin my mane around a couple times and jump around screaming and whooping and riling them up.  I pull out my last two apples and take a bite of one with a huge smile and toss it to a filly in the crowd then do a back flip.  They're so easily entertained.

I  trot happily away with a few following and back to Sugarcube Corner and trot in.  The Cakes are almost shocked to see me as I slam the door shut and lock it behind me.  "Pinkie?!  Oh, we're so glad to see you're safe and well.  You scared the whole town when you went missing!  We thought the worse had happened."  Mr. Cake said with worry in his voice but relief in his face.  I can't smile at him or Mrs. Cake, all I feel is fear and worry about what Pinkie will do if I let her have my body again.

"Please, get Twilight here.  I need her help or I'm going to die."  They look at me with fear and then each other.

"What do you mean dear?"  Mrs. Cake asks me.  What do I tell her?  How do I convince her, or, should I just ignore her and get Twilight myself.  I don't know how much longer I can keep Pinkie at bay anymore.  I look at them with those Pinkie puppy eyes and whimper.  I can see Mrs. Cake's heart melt and she trots to the kitchen and I hear the door open.

"Mr. Cake, can I have something to eat?"  He looks at me like I'm a fool for asking.  He turns and goes into the kitchen while the several ponies have turned into two dozen, screaming her name.  Pinkie, Pinkie, Pinkie.  She really did hold this community in the base of her hoof.

After I eat some real food and half a cake with fresh juice I go to my old room.  It's just like I left it except the balloons are deflated and some streamers have fallen from the cheap tape we buy to hold them up.  I lay on my bed and look at the ceiling and slowly feel sleep gripping me.  NO, I won't let her have control, not now when I'm so close.  I hear hoof steps galloping through the house.  Twilight must be here, I can feel her magic from a few hundred feet away.  Changelings have the oddest powers.

The door is surrounded by a purple aura then opens just as Twilight gallops in to the bedside.  Her horn is mostly grown back and focusing magic the way it should.  I can taste the confused anger and worry from her.  "Twilight, before you start threatening or rambling I have to say yes, I am Pinkamena.  Your spell worked wonders for me and I was able to see the world for a while.  It was amazing, but, she got out.  She has true control of my body and life when I sleep.  I sleep for six hours every two days, I feel terrible."

"So, what do you want from me?  You think I'm boring and too into science, which I'll agree too sometimes, but I know what I'm talking about and what I'm doing.  Want me to recast the spell for you so you can disappear until you need me again?  Because I'm not going to be your warden."

"I know you have a spell that can banish her.  Use it on me."  Her horn stops glowing and she looks at me concerned.  I don't like the taste of concern.  It's like hot lemonade; Ick.  Luna, just let her start blabbing already, I could use the distraction.

"No, I won't use it."  That's all she says.  No long winded story or explanation.  I sit up and move my mane out of my eyes and look at her.  She's serious.

"Why?  I'll be free to live the life that was stolen from me."

"Because, the spell will banish one of you, I can't control which one.  It's a rare spell made for expert psychologists, it can't be used freely."

"Then, get a professional to do it."

"They'll say the same thing, Pinkamena.  Its the nature of the spell.  They cast it and help whichever personality remains cope with life alone."

"So, either you get the Pinkie you know back and life in the city and world returns to how it was, or you get me.  A depressed mare with emotional issues and scars that won't heal without time and that's," I stop and sigh, "Maybe you should just get her back.  I don't have a place in this world and probably never would have to begin with.  Just a rock farmer from a family of rock farmers."

"Pinkie, I mean Pinkamena, that's not true.  Everypony has a place in the world.  You may not have chosen this path but you can make a new one.  I think that we should all get together and talk about this, as a family of friends."

"Fine, whatever.  I've said my piece and I've made peace with the decision."

"OH, oh!  Me too!  I've made pieces of cake and pie too.  I'll share if you let me win!"  Great, Pinkie's here and talking.  This isn't going to get annoying in about three sentences.

"Oh, hi Pinkie?  It's me, Twilight.  How are you?"

"You mean since you put me in time out and I couldn't do anything for three months and was all bored and not having fun at all and there was this party she looked at and it was SOOO fun but she walked past it like it was just, meh, and I was like 'go back!' but she couldn't hear me and I cried for days.  Since then? I've been good.  Thanks for asking.  I walk to the mirror and look into it to see my reflection and I see her.  Bright pink and curly hair and that smile that makes my nauseous.  That's who I can talk to and not feel like a fool yelling at the air.

"You're welcome, Pinkie," I say blandly.  I can't tolerate her energy on the best of days, now we're arguing with the same mouth in front of others.  "Pinkie, let's just have her cast the spell.  I think if we do this spell there's a 50/50 either way and that way one of us will be out of the others' misery."

"You may think it's misery but *I** love my life and what I've done.  It's making others happy and that makes me happy which makes them happy and then I get happy so then-*"

"OKAY, stop Pinkie, Pinkamena.  You two aren't solving this by arguing.  I don't think I should cast the spell without the others present."

I look at that annoying mare and I feel so frustrated with her answer.  "What difference will it make?  Either way you'll do it and one of us will be here.  I can deliver desserts as good as any other pony and I can still live here, if they'll let me.  Cast the spell, Twilight."

"Yeah, I wanna be the party pony forever, not a sad little mopey dopey that can't have fun."

"That's not me, I never had a chance to live thanks to you."  I shout at the mirror and her smile fades as she looks at me.

"I am sorry Pinkamena.  I didn't plan for this to happen.  My existence was simple before I became one with you: Take others' powers and eventually return them to Discord.  I would have simply entered you and killed you then moved on, but that day fate had other plans.  I couldn't leave you.  I tried, believe me I did.  But, the changeling I had devoured had powers I couldn't control and when I felt your joy it made me want more.

I threw that first party and got a cutie mark, then I just. Kept. Doing it.  If you weren't always there I'd have forgotten I was... whatever I was, years ago.  If this is a chance for one of us to live then I say we take it."

"That's the first time you've apologized in all these years.  Twilight, let's do this."

"I'm sorry, Twilight says as she looks at us and her horn glows.  Brighter and brighter and I see her eyes turning white as she shuts them.  A bright light eminates from her horn at us.  It hurts and my brain feels like it's burning.  I clasp my hooves to my head and scream as the world goes dark.

I open my eyes and see my friends around me.  I'm back in the hospital, that sterile smell and whiteness all around.  I take in a deep breath and look at them.  I feel quiet in my head.  "Thanks, Twilight," I say as I smile at her.

My life as a mare begins today.