Kinky Ponies

by Henry Hatsworth

Rating: mature
Tags: Random, Pinkie Pie, Twilight Sparkle, Gore, Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark, Rainbow Dash, Comedy, Rarity, Romance, Fluttershy, Sex
Length: 3442

Some perverted Bronies end up in Equestria, and things are never the same for them.

Early sunday morning, some clopfic writers and Rule 34 artists were RPing on an explicit pony website. Little did they know that they were about to have all their sick fantasies realised.....

Published 2011-11-12 04:17:23 UTC
Last updated 2012-04-20 22:17:18 UTC

Part 1: Late Night Clopping

It was Sunday morning, 4 o' clock, and a teenager known only to his peers as Dashie499 was on his computer. He was one of the many people who frequented a website known as MyLittlePorny.com, where all the perverted bronies in the world gathered to share their Sexual pony fantasies. At this point, Dashie was in one of the many roleplaying chatrooms that this site hosted.
"And then....Rarity.....She began to....Oh yes!" He said while pleasuring himself by the light of his laptop monitor."Can I just say, guys, this is one of the sexiest things I've ever read!
"Thank you."Replied another user named flutterfuckershy.
"We aim to please, if you know what I mean XD." Added a third, clopwriter3.
"Ungh...And then....She.......Vagina......Horn.....Oh...OH YEAH!" Screamed Dashie as he reached climax."Ooh. Gimme a moment guys, I forgot the tissue again." As he got up to get a tissue so that he could clean up his mess, the radio came on.
"Better get the shovels out 'cause Winter Wrap Up's just around the corner!" Dashie was intrigued.
"Wait a minute, that almost sounded like......"

A few minutes later, once another RP had been started involving the mane six and a cucumber, Dashie got back on the computer.
"Guys, you are not gonna believe this."
"Let me guess, you ran out of tissue and now your parents are gonna wake up to a massive jizz stain?"Joked Flutterfuckershy.
"Okay, for the last fucking time, shut up about me and my folks! And besides, you're not even close."
"What, you end up in Equestria or somethin'?"
"well, now that you mention it...."
"Okay man, stop screwing us around. What is it?"
"I looked out of my window, and do you know what I saw? I saw Ponies. Marching outside my window."
"NO WAI."
"WAI."
"YOU GOTTA BE KIDDING ME."
"see for yourself!"
Dashie then brought up a live video stream of winter wrap up going on outside his house. Flutter stared in awe at the winter wrap up procession going on right outside Dashie's window. As he watched he couldn't help but notice that the sound seemed slightly out of sync with the video. He at first assumed that this was a sign that the whole thing was an elaborate hoax, but then he noticed that the sound wasn't coming from his earphones. It was coming from his window. He opened the curtains and nearly shat a brick when he saw the remainder of the procession going on outside HIS window.
"OMG THIS IS AWESOME!!!"
"INORITE?"
The two wasted no time in getting to the main chatroom to share their discovery with other pony fans, but they were all showing the same thing. Ponies in windows. Then they all cam to a shocking realisation.
"Guys......We're all in Equestria."
"No shit Sherlock."

Part 3: Contact

"Right," Clopwriter said to one of the others in the room."I've seen the inside of your house and I know that you have a wine cellar. Get me three bottles of chateau latour 45 and a double jeroboam of champagne."
"And the usual brown ales?" He replied.
"Actually, I think we'll only need one crate." Clopwriter told him as he made his way to the door. When he opened it, he inwardly rejoiced at seeing Fluttershy standing right in front of him.
"Oh, I'm sorry. I hope I wasn't interrupting anything." She said in her usual timid manner.
"Not at all, come on in!" Clopwriter told her, trying to be as sincere as possible.
"Are you sure? I don't want to be a burden." She replied.
"Honestly, it's fine." He said as he stood aside for her to enter."Quick, get a camera." He whispered to Dashie, who ran upstairs to get his video camera just as the other human came back."Ah, good. Come, Fluttershy, have a drink." He said to the pegasus as she nervously walked into the room.
"That's not the only time he'll be using the word come, eh?" Joked Flutterfuckershy. Clopwriter sat down on a nearby sofa and poured two glasses of wine, one for him and one for Fluttershy. She picked up the glass and sheepishly took a sip.
"Not bad." She said.
"I take it you're something of a connoisseur." Clopwriter replied, trying to seem as smooth as possible."Go on, have some more." Fluttershy continued drinking until the glass was empty, at which point Clopwriter poured her some more. This continued until both of them were well and truly hammered. Clopwriter took this time to make his move.
"Tell me, Fluttershy, what do you look for in a lover?" He asked her.
"Well, I've never really thought about it." She replied, not really thinking much of such a question.
"Allow me to help you with that thought." Clopwriter said as he leaned over towards her.
"He's gonna do it, he's gonna do it!" Dashie said excitedly. And then it happened. Clopwriter put his mouth to Fluttershy's and kissed her, taking her by complete surprise. Out of politeness, she waited until he was finished before responding.
"Wow. I had no idea that you.....I mean.... I don't know what to say."
"Then say nothing."Clopwriter replied."Just take in this experience." Clopwriter told her.
"Okay then, just tell me one thing. Who are you?" She asked.
"I am clopwri-erm, Reg." He replied.
"Pfft, Reg? That's your real name?" Exclaimed Dashie.
"Shut up! Now, where were we?" Reg said as he turned his attention back to the main goal and kissed Fluttershy again, only this time she was a bit more co-operative. The two stayed in their embrace for a while before Reg made his next move.
"Contact!" He yelled as he pulled himself off Fluttershy and began stroking her clit, causing her to moan loudly. Some of the others started cheering for him as he did this.
"OH MY WORD." Fluttershy said, gasping in both surprise and pleasure."Oh yes, more!"
"More, you say?" Reg said in as ridiculously posh a voice he could muster."Okay then! Part two!" He shouted as he plunged right in there with his tongue, licking all around Fluttershy's pussy. She moaned louder and louder as she neared climax.
"Good thing I'm recording this!" Dashie shouted, trying to be heard over all the moaning. Eventually, Fluttershy began screaming and a large flow of pony jizz hit Reg square in the face. He licked all of it off his face quickly, partly due to some of it going near his eyes, partly due to his wanting to keep this going for as long as possible. But, it was not to be. Fluttershy got up and went towards the door.
"Wow, I had no idea that something could feel as good as that. Thank you." She said to Reg.
"No problem. Have a nice day." He replied, trying to sound normal. But the moment she was out of the door, he turned around and began High-fiving everyone in the room.
"well guys, I'd say that was a fucking success!" He shouted.
"'Fucking' is right." Joked Dashie.
"Good one." Replied Reg, beginning to grow tired of the seemingly constant wisecracks coming from the others."Right. I realise some of you may be feeling a bit left out, but don't worry. I just need some time to think, and then we'll all get all the pony pussy we can dream of!" The entire room went up in cheers at this. Meanwhile, Fluttershy was meeting back up with all the other ponies.
"There you are Fluttershy! What have you been doing all this time?" Asked an irate Twilight Sparkle.
"Trust me, you don't want to know." Said Fluttershy, still showing her orgasm face.
"Hmmmmm. I wonder......." Twlight said to herself.

Part 4: Lending one's services

"Alright lads, I want you all to go back to your own places and go about your business. Meet me in the cellar at 6 in the morning. I'll talk you through the rest there." Reg said as the rest of the men began to leave out of the back door as to avoid raising suspicion or starting mass panic. Once they were all gone, Reg set about putting his carefully thought out plan into action. This was gonna be a long day...

*9PM THAT SAME DAY*

The raindrops gently pattered down against the windows of Rarity's bedroom. It was a light rain though, not enough to wake her. She lay in peaceful slumber when she was suddenly awoken by the sound of the window opening and the rain and wind becoming louder now that there was no glass in it's way. She then heard a thudding sound. Her eyes darted around the room as she tried to ascertain the source of this noise. She saw nothing, however, and was about to return to sleep when she heard another noise. But this time, it was more than a noise. It was a voice.
"Madame." The voice said as the tall silhouette of Reg adressed the fashionista pony.

She scrambled for the lamp on her bedside table, and gasped as she tured it on and saw the human standing before her
"Who are you?" She demanded, considerably frightened by this mysterious creature.
"Merely somepony, or someone, rather, who appreciates the finer things in life, much like yourself. You may call me Reg." He said in his mock sophisticated voice.
"Alright then, Reg, what do you want from me?" Rarity asked, most of the fear having been replaced with intrigue and confusion.
"I require you to... how shall I put this? Lend your services, for me and my acquaintances." Reg explained with an air of charisma.
"What do you mean, my services?" The white unicorn replied, growing more and more curious by the minute. Reg leaned across the bed and stuck his face right in front of Rarity's, a look of twisted perversion on his face.
"You know what I mean." He whispered seductively before retreating to the foot of the bed."Meet me underneath twilight Sparkle's library at 7AM tomorrow. Do not be late." He said, gritting his teeth on the last sentence.
"Alright, I'll be there." Rarity said as Reg made his way over to the window.
"Excellent." He said in a sinister manner."Oh, one more thing. You are not to tell anyone about me or my acquaintances. Or else." He said before jumping out of the window and running off into the night.

*6AM THE NEXT DAY*

The humans had gathered in the cellar on Reg's instruction. Now they simply required the presence of the man himself.
"Lads," He said as he walked in."I understand that we are doing this for the purpose of sex, are we not?"
"Yeah, what else would we be doing? This ain't some shitty fanfic!" Flutterfuckershy blurted out from near the front of the crowd.
"Yeah, thanks for that observation. mate." Reg said sarcastically."Anyhoo, if you all follow me through this passageway behind me, you'll see what I've been working on to get us just that." He explained as he turned and began walking down the passage.
"Not the only passage we'll be using while we're here, am I right?" Joked Flutterfuckershy.
"Shut it." Reg snapped, barely turning his head as he continued down the passageway. The others followed him in single file until they reached their destination. They stared in awe at what Reg had done. He had remodelled the laboratory underneath Twilight Sparkle's library and made it into what looked like the set of a porno film.
"Jesus christ." Dashie said as he continued to stare."How'd you do all this in one night?"
"Long story." Reg told him."Let's just say I never want to be down a hole with a honey badger and some magic mushrooms ever again. Anyway, just give me a bit more time. I've got some things still to bring in and We need to be ready for when-"
"Reg? Are you down here?" Said a voice coming from the stairs. Upon hearing it, Reg smiled the same perverted smile as last night.
"Lads, get ready for more!"

Part 5: Sexy time

A GOOD PORTION OF THIS CHAPTER IS BROUGHT TO YOU BY THE APPLE IPAD. PLEASE EXCUSE ANY SPELLING ERRORS, IT'S ALL THE IPAD'S FAULT.

Everyone stepped to the side of the room, allowing Reg to greet the pony who was making her way down the stairs. When she emerged the entire group recognised her as Rarity, and shocked murmurs went through the crowd at how Reg was able to persuade one of the most high class ponies in all of Equestria to become what was essentially a prostitute for the group.
"Oh my, so these are the 'clients' you were referring to last night." Rarity said as she walked towards Reg.
"Indeed they are, my dear." Reg said as he noticed the fine dress Rarity was wearing."That's a nice outfit you got there. You know, if you get a bit hot you could always just strip off." Reg said, leaning in towards her and putting emphasis on certain words as to create no uncertainty as to his true in.
"Wait, are you trying to- You are!" Rarity gasped as she realised what she was here for.
"Yes. Now hurry up and get that thing off." Reg said, seeming awfully blunt, given the circumstances.
"Never! How can you honestly expect me to just parade about naked for anyone who asks? I mean really, who on earth would have the nerve to even suggest such an idea?" The unicorn began and intended to continue for some time, most likely. Reg Sighed, not wishing to be subjected to a morality lecture.
"Listen Rarity. You may be offended by the idea now, but if you just give the issue some thought I know you'll not regret what we're asking of you." He said to her in the most charismatic and sensual voice he could muster. He stared at her intently, as if he was looking into her soul. Rarity stared back, almost bewitched, before silently admitting defeat and removing her dress. Reg rubbed his hands together in anticipation. He had experienced ponysex before, but only now could his old feller get in on the action.
"Lads, avert your eyes." He said before stripping himself of his clothes. He was finished in good time to watch Rarity undress, and was relishing the chance to prepare himself for the task ahead. However, just as he felt his member reach its full extension, he began to hear the unmistakable sound of footsteps. Except they weren't, they were what would be more accurately discribed as hoofsteps.

Reg hadn't prepared for this, all he could do was stand there and take what was coming to him. He listened to each step Twilight took down the stairs in time with his rapidly beating heart until. Twilight reached the bottom of the stairs after what seemed like an eternity. At first, she didn't know what to make of the situation. She could register nothing but complete shock at seeing one of her best friends about to have sex with some unknown species. But the more she thought about it, the more the situation slowly began to turn her on. Awkwardly, she approached Rarity slowly before addressing Reg.
"You don't mind, do you?" She said, blushing slightly. Reg thought to object, before it dawned on him what this situation entailed.
"No, go right ahead." He said, his awkwardness now being faked in an effort to disguise his extreme arousal at the thought that had just hit him. He stepped back slowly into the group, putting his trousers back on as he did so, while Twilight and Rarity walked towards each other. Slowly, the two unicorns kissed. They were nervous at first. But now that they had the taste of each other, nothing in the world would have stopped them. Before long, they'd adopted a 69 position. The group of humans stared at them, each of them not surprised to have a stiffy. This was like everything they'd ever wanted fully realised. Towards the back of the group, Flutterfuckershy was tempted to go off into the corner and have a wank, but then they two ponies did something not eve he'd ever expected.

Twilight and Rarity began to change positions slightly. Twilight rolled over and shoved her horn in Rarity's vagina, while Rarity did the same to Twilight. The two took a moment to enjoy the erotic sensations that this act brought on, before Twilight turned her head to Reg.
"You want in on this?" She asked while trying to keep back moans of pleasure. Reg approached them enthusiastically, undressing for the second time, when he stopped. He turned back around to the rest of the group, trousers halfway down his legs, and asked the, a question.
"Any o' you lads fancy a go too? This looks like a bit of a two man job, if you know what I mean." He said. Upon hearing these words, Flutterfuckershy shot to the front of the group as if someone'd shot at his heels.
"Why didn't you say so before? Let's do this!" He shouted. Reg nodded at him, and the two went to work. Reg lay on the bottom with Fuckershy on the top. Almost perfectly in sync, they slid their cocks into the two ponies arseholes, surprised at how easily accessible they were. The four of them went at it like mad, moaning and shouting as if they had something to prove. It felt good to them, but confusion went through the crowd.
"The fuck am I looking at?" One human whispered.
"I dunno. Looks to me like some kind of double decker sex sandwich or something." Replied a second. They didn't have to question the spectacle for much longer though, as the four of them all came one after the other. Panting heavily, they rolled off each other and the two humans began to put their clothed back on.
"Well, that was truly something." Rarity remarked as she too put her dress back on.
"I agree, I've haven't felt that good in forever." Twilight said as she stood up."Thank you for that Mister, um," She said as she realised she didn't know the name sod either of the two creatures who had just brought her to climax.
"Reg." Reg said as he mimed tipping a hat in her direction.
"And Gerald." Flutterfuckershy, or Gerald as he was now known, said.
"Gerald?!" Reg blurted out, trying not to laugh
"Shut it." Gerald said to him.
"Okay then, Reg and Gerald, would you like to stay for a while?" Twilight asked the two of them.
"Why that would be lovely, yes." Reg replied calmly. But then a voice broke out from the crowd of humans.
"But mate, what about uploadi-" it began before it was cut off.
"Shut it!" Reg shouted before turning his head back towards Twilight."Terribly sorry about him, off his meds, you see."
"But seriously, what are we gonna do with the foota-" The voice said before being cut off again.
"Will you shut your fucking face? Erm, actually we'd best be going." Reg said as he ushered the humans back down the tunnel.
"Wait!" Twilight shouted after them."What are you? And why do you have a tunnel leading to my basement?"
"Long story!" Reg shouted as he and all the others disappeared down them tunnel. And that was all he said.

Part 2: The ultimate rule 34

Unable to contain himself any longer, Dashie ran for his front door and discovered that their Equestria theory was indeed correct. He then went back inside, closed his door, and screamed at the top of his lungs with joy. To his surprise, he heard a chorus of voices joining in, the entire website was here. Dashie ran outside again and discovered 7 other humans. They all shouted in joy again and ran into one of the houses, for each one had come from his own.
"Right, is this awesome or is this awesome?" Shouted Dashie as he high-fived Flutterfuckershy.
"I know!" He replied. "what do we do first? Imma go find Dash, then I can die a happy man."
"guys, you're all missing the big opportunity here!" Clopwriter said as he addressed the group."We can make the ultimate rule 34! All we need is a camera, some alcohol and we're set to have all of our fantasies realised!" The entire group cheered at this suggestion."Then it's settled. The plan is this: Part one-"
"Excuse me? Um, is anypony in here?" Said a faint voice from outside. They all recognised this voice as belonging to an object that many of them desired.
"Part one, participants..."