Stoned

by MrNoWaves

Rating: teen
Tags: Slice of Life, Human, Comedy
Length: 1002

'You' and Rainbro have a green day.

After skipping work for Apple Jack, 'You' and your bro, Rainbow Dash decide to 420 blaze it. Will she confess her undying love for you? Will you two have kinky, stoned sex? Will you figure out the meaning of life? I dunno, Google it.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2015-05-03 02:55:43 UTC

A Green Day

It was a warm summer day in Ponyville, except today was a Green Day for you and Rainbro. You ditched the work you had to do for Apple Jack on Sweet Apple Acres and decided to get stoned with your best bro, Rainbro Dash. She was the creme of the crop when it came to bros. She would always have your back and I mean ALWAYS. She also made a mean plate of sketti. 'Best Sketti in Equestria' as you would call it. Add some parmesan to that fucker and you were eating a dinner made for champs. You two would usually get high on days like this, listening and watching what ever you had your hands on. Today's selection was Troll 2 and Green Hay's Sweet Foals EP. The horse puns are strong with this one.

RD was glazed over, not knowing what was going on while you were just humming along. It was a good song to say the least but it was soon ruined when your bro let out a wet fart, causing you to cover your nose when the smell hit you like a ton of bricks.

"GAH! Bro, what the fuck!"

She just giggled like a little school filly. Holy fuck the smell was bad. It had a mix of burned skin and moldy chickun dumplings. You will never forget the horrors you had to go through back home with a pot of moldy chicken dumplings... oh the horrors. You almost had an aneurysm from the smell but it was gone as quickly as it came. You look over and see that Rainbro cracked a window open, soon returning to her spot on the couch.

What a bro. You released your hands from your nose and grabbed a blunt, taking a drag from the substance. The stuff you were smoking was dank as fuck. Considering you two were watching Troll 2 of all things, the dank just made the movie seem like something Stanley Kubrick would ma-

Oh my gaaaaawwwd!

And the movie was back to shit. You groan at that awful line while your Bro was laughing her ass off. Soon getting out of her laughing fit, she asked you, "Wasn't that bucking hilarious!"

You replied with a simple 'Eh' before returning to this god awful movie. Besides, you just didn't give a shit anymore. After you landed in Equestria, you just wanted to go back home. You had nothing to do so the only thing to pass the time was hang out with your bro and smoke yourself to death. And thus here you were. Doing the same thing you've been doing for a year and a half, watching shitty movies with your bro. Life was good.

"Hey Anon, whats wrong?" She asked, a slight hint of concern in her voice. Truly a bro for the ages.

You look over and replied, "Nothing, just bored." Now that was a bold faced lie. If you were talking to Apple Rape at this moment, she would get on your ass for lying but since you were talking to your bro, she just let it slide. She nodded and you both went back to the movie.

4 hours later

At this point you two have blown through 2 bags of Marey Jane, 3 Green Hay records, 18 bags of chips, and 2 movies. You and your bro were now having a conversation that could brake the fabrics of reality.

It was about butts.

"AJ's butt is better than Pinkie's!" You replied as the talk between you two got more intense by the second.

"Yeah, how so!?"

This was your chance to shine, Anon.

"Well its firm and has a nice jiggle to it and you could beat on it like a pair of drums if you wanted to!" After giving her your answer, you stood in triumph but soon fell back down on the couch from how stoned you were. Marey Jane sure has a kick to it.

"You have a point." Rainbro replied, admitting defeat. After the intense brain workout you two had, you both soon broke out into a giggle fit. After you two calmed down you took a hit from your blunt, inhaling soon turning into exhaling. Dis sum dank ass shit.

Is that you, John Wayne? Is this me?

Who said that? WHO THE FUCK SAID THAT!?!

Ahh, Full Metal Jacket. Your favourite movie. You would always watch it on sick days back home on earth and always got a kick out of it. Soon, you started using Joker's line as your catchphrase, anoying your friends with it back home, but those days are long gone and here you are in a land of pastel colored horses. Speaking of horses, you look over and see that your bro has passed out, snoring loudly. The noise was unbearable but since she was your bro, you decided to not wake her up over a little thing. You soon look at the wall clock situated over your flatscreen TV, showing that the time was 9:53 pm. Since you had to work a Rarity's tomorrow you decided to pass out on the couch also. You didn't want to turn everything off since you would fall on your ass trying to do all that, causing your bro to wake up from her stoned slumber and getting mad at you. God only knows what happened last time. You still have sores on your ass from the roasting she gave you for waking her up at 2:34 in the morning.

Pulling the couch recliner up, hoping the noise wouldn't wake Rainbro up and to your suprised it didn't, you get into a comfy position and say one thing before passing out into a stoner's paradise.

"Night Rainbro."

She let out a loud, drawn out fart that could rival those of the gods in response. Truly a one of a kind bro you have on your hands.

Today was a good day to get stoned with your bro.