Living with the Nightmare

by Dundundun

Rating: mature
Tags: Comedy, Random, Adventure, Human, Alternate Universe, Romance
Length: 3991

Living with a roommate is not so bad unless you have a purged alicorn living with you.

Hello, my name is Michael.
Living in Equestria has not been so bad. Unless I count the fact that almost everyone treats me like shit, because I am different.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Just me on this one again.. Anyone wanna help just post in the comments. I put alternate universe tag because most likely it wont be the same as the canon.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2015-06-24 13:16:31 UTC

INCOMING

My name is Michael and I have been living in Equestria for about a month now, so any who your probably asking how I got here well I got here because of Twilight performing a spell that was in the Old Archives. When I showed up everypony freaked out and started tossing rocks at me and saying "GO AWAY BEAST YOUR NOT WELCOMED IN OUR LAND!!!!" Pretty shitty day if you ask me, so I ran far oh so far my legs still hurt because of it. Twilight that asshat told princess Celestia about me so now I have a sun goddess chasing after my ass, I managed to run about 10 minutes until she caught up with me, for some reason pony's cant levitate me. She tackled me, so I punched her in the face, 'I wish I didn't' we had a hoof to fist fight and eventually she won. I still have a bruise on my nuts because of her, she knocked me out and brought me back to the castle infirmary.

I awoke to the sound of hoof clopping plus my nuts where on fire, I looked down and saw a huge bruise on my lefty. That same horse plus a purple one known as Twilight popped in I screamed "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME SHIT HEADS BEFORE I TURN YOU INTO GLUE" I actually took the alarm clock off the desk and threw it at Twilight, it hit her in the face and she started to cry 'No pitty for that bitch'. The big horse teleported Twilight out of the room when she looked at me with a stern face, I had my shoe off and ready to strike.

The big horse began to speak "Calm down it's alright I know that the pony's at ponyville threw rocks at you and you have reasons to be mad, but calm down please I am begging you"

I lowered my shoe down and she walked over to me I started to panic "Get away from me now or I will do something drastic big white horse that has wings and a horn, wait what the fuck are you a uniwing or a wingacorn?"

"My name is Celestia and I am the ruler of this Nation also I am a alicorn, so please calm down or I will have to put you into a dungeon, also how is your left nut doing,I heard that I accidentally bucked it with my hooves. Here let me check on it."

Celestia began to move towards my Naughty square so I pushed her back with my hand and said "nope nope nopedy nope, and by the way my name is Michael so can you please leave me alone I just want to rest when I feel better I will leave your country and get on with my life as you can already tell I am not from this planet, so I am asking again to just leave me alone." Tears started to well up in my eyes the only thoughts going through my head 'am I ever gunna  go home and see my parents? Or my family at all?"

Celestia did something that I have not gotten in a long time, she actually gave me a hug I cried into her shoulder. 'Don't make fun of me I am only 18' "Shhhh it's ok you can stay here in Canterlot until you get back on your hooves or feet in your situation."

"Thank you" was all I could say I have never ever met a person/pony so kind as her even after that fist fight she still lets me sleep in her castle, I have to repay her some how though.

"Now get some sleep Michael, tomorrow we will go back to ponyville and make them say there sorry for treating you like dirt ok" she looked at me with a warm smile, "oh and by the way when it hits spring leave the castle and go camp out away from every mare on this planet understand?"

"Why" I asked

"Why you ask, well because us mare's go into heat season and gets any stallion or in your case guy and rut them silly"

I was shocked and scared 'Just imagine Twilight pinning you down and raping you constantly over and over again' I literally gagged and threw up on the floor I think Celestia new why because she bolted out of the room to get a mop and a bucket.

About a week later after getting out of the hospital I found out that I need special made crutches because my leg is broke, 'OH HOW GREAT' so any who, Celestia had to literally take me to my room with me riding on her back. It was fun and all but I got weird looks from the maids, and some other maid gave me a seductive look, I flipped her off but I guess she took it the kinky way because she started to wave her rump at me I kind of found it ho... 'MICHAEL WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU THINKING ABOUT NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO HORSES FOR YOU TO HAVE SEX WITH NOT TODAY MOTHER FUCKER.' Any who when I got to my room Celestia said that she would be back later to check on me, I had to piss so when I tried to walk I fell so I crawled to the bathroom, I had to sit down to pee because I couldn't stand on my own well I went back to my bed and drifted off to sleep.

I heard this weird noise like someone was calling me it said "Michael wake up sleepy head"

"Ugh five more minutes mom" I then felt something crawl into bed with me I bolted up and saw Twilight staring me down with a seductive look in her eyes.

"Hey there stud how about you lay down and we have some fun"

I screamed "CELESTIA HELP ME THERE IS A FUCKING RAPIST IN MY ROOM"

Celestia bolted into my room with a kitchen knife floating in her magic she dropped the knife and teleported Twilight out of the room "I am so sorry Michael she must of got pass our defences I will deal with her immediately now go back to bed."

"Alright mom good night"

Celestia stared at me like I had ten heads when she tried to speak I was already fast asleep.

New Friends On Thin Ice

Living with the Nightmare

Chapter 2

Michael looked around at his surroundings. The best description he could give it would be that it’s very… white. Like, blindingly white. The only thing that wasn't white was Luna. She moved her mouth, and tried to talk to Michael, but only a slight chatter came out. She stopped and cocked her head to the left, looking at Michael quizzically.

“Uhh… yes?” he said, hoping he answered correctly. Luna hopped of her non-existant seat, and started to approach. She closed her eyes and pouted her lips, moving her head closer to Michael. He tried to scramble backwards, but was trapped by an invisible wall. “Stop!” he begged, using all of his upper-body strength to keep Luna from planting her lips on his. “I’m not a horse-fucker!”

Instantly, she stopped. Taking a step back, Luna melted into the floor and vanished. Michael tried to comprehend what was going on. This couldn’t be real… could it? He looked upwards, and watched as ice froze quickly over the walls and floor, and started to climb up his leg. Michael shrieked and tried to kick it off to no effect. The ice encased his body and as it started to cover his eyes, he was sucked back into the real world.

“Agh! What the actual fuck!” Michael screamed as he thrusted his hand forwards, hitting whatever was in the way. As his hand made contact, there was a scream, then a whimper. Michael looked up and saw Celestia with a bucket in her magic and Twilight clutching her muzzle. Michael barely opened his mouth to apologise before he was launched out of the bed and forcefully thrown up against the wall with a spear hovering dangerously close to his throat.

“You better apologise right fucking now!” Shining Armour threatened with a deathly stare.

“Well excuse me retard, I was enjoying my sleep before the rapist you call a sister, and Celestia splashed me with cold-ass water! Now, get the fuck off me or I will take that spear and shove it right up your ass!.”

He motioned the spear downwards to my chest, holding it mere millimeters from the skin.

“You’ve got a smart mouth for someone who is at the sharp end of a spear.”

I quickly grabbed his spear and pushed him off with me and onto the floor with my foot, before getting on top of him and pointing the spear tip at his dick.

“Talk to me like that again ass-fuck, and you’re gonna feel a slight burn on your right testicle.” Michael replied, aiming it slightly to the right and applying a light amount of pressure.

“Ok! Get off! Get off!” he cried.

“Now now Michael, there’s no need to give a vasectomy to the Captain of the Royal Guard,” Celestia said.

Before he had a chance to react to what was going on, Twilight ripped the spear from his grasp, and impaled it on the far wall. Michael noticed Twilight’s horn was glowing and erupting a small amount of magic, it looked like she was on fire… purple fire. Michael tried to ask Twilight what she was doing, but as he tried to open his mouth, time slowed to a blur around him. He felt a slight tingle in each of his temples, which at first he took no notice of, but as time went on, they developed to more than just a tingle, to a throb, but it didn’t stop there. The pain slowly built up in his brain, rising to an unbearable amount, but still it kept going. Michael pressed his hands to each side of his head, trying to scream but couldn’t make any noise. Blood freely flowed down from his nose into his mouth, as he started to slightly drown in it. His surroundings all swirled and mixed into a mush, making him crumple to a fetal position on the floor, before he was plunged into darkness.

Michael opened his eyes and regretted it instantly. Pain bounced around in the inside of his skull. He tried to move his arm, to the same result. Even breathing made his temples throb lightly. Celestia noticed the subtle movement and was quickly drawn from her thoughts.

“Michael, are you ok?” she asked sincerely.

“N-No… I’m not alright… doing just about anything… hurts,” He said pausing every few words, due to the pain.

“Well Twilight hit you with a sickness spell, which is only suppose to cause dizziness, a  migraine at the most. Nothing like the symptoms you are describing.

“Oh,” was all he could say before his stomach violently churned, and let out a torrent of bodily fluids onto the floor. He mentally screamed at himself, the pain he was experiencing made squeezing your head in a vice look pleasant.

“Well that seems to be the spell she put on you…” Celestia stated. Michael mentally nodded in agreement. No shit.

“You need to rest while we find an ailment for you,” Celestia said as she got up to leave. “I’ll be back once a day to check on your progress. Michael just mentally sighed to himself. How did he get himself is such shitty situations? A question that would probably go unanswered for a long time. After getting bored of thinking to himself for about an hour, he decided to get some rest.

He didn’t know what time it was, but he knew it was late by the lack of lights. He heard a light clopping of hooves from out the door, and they were approaching. Michael started to panic, at the thought that it might be Twilight.

The hoofsteps stopped just by the side of the bed. Michael laid as still as he could, maybe he could get Twilight with the act of surprise.

Michael was surprised when Twilight leaned in and sniffed him. Wait… sniffed?  She prodded his arm, and even though it was a tender tap, it was still enough to make Michael cry out. Hammering his eyelids open, Michael saw that it was not in fact Twilight, but a taller, black alicorn, with a rich, glinting, blue mane that flowed even though there wasn’t a draft.

“Be quiet, Michael! You will attract somepony’s attention!” The mysterious mare said with a slightly harsh tone. After Michael finally recovered he came to a realisation. She said be quiet, Michael.

“You said my name,” He said, “How do you know my name?”

“What do you mean… I-I never said your name.” she stuttered, noticeably avoiding eye contact.

“No, you said my name, but i’ve never seen you before,” Michael replied. The mare was quiet for a long time, before she finally spoke up.

“I submit!” she said, looking downwards at the floor, “I’ve been… watching you,” she with a whisper that could give Fluttershy a run for her money.

“Watching me?” Michael questioned.

“Y-Yes… when I heard news of a new species arriving in Equestria, it caught my attention… you caught my attention,” she said with a bit more confidence, “I came here to see what you were like up close, it was just that you were always surrounded by others and that the only way to get to talk to you one-on-one would to be to get you somewhere a little more… private. So I took control of that purple mare that Celestia values so much, and used her body to put a spell on you. But I didn’t think it would have brought such pain”

“So you almost killed me!” Michael yelled a little too loudly. The mare’s ears twitched.

“Somepony is coming! I must go, do not tell Celestia about this. I will return tomorrow night.” She said, before she magically vanished from the room. Hearing the upcoming hoofsteps, Michael laid back and closed his eyes. The guard came up to his room and looked around for what the noise was, but could only see Michael pretending to be asleep. The guard shrugged it off and went back to his post. Michael opened his eyes and stared at the roof, contemplating and reflecting on the recent happenings. But it wasn’t long before his eyes started to droop and he drifted off to sleep.

Cold...

Living with the Nightmare

Chapter 3

Michael studied his surroundings. The only adjective he could use would be… white. He suddenly stopped.

“I’ve been here before,” he said in a daze. He looked at Luna, who was sitting there, just like she was last time. Luna opened her mouth and made the same chattering sounds she did last time. And just like deja vu, she cocked her head to the left.

“No,” Michael answered confidently. making sure he wouldn’t make the same mistake. All emotion drained from Luna’s face. She began to quiver all over as huge tears welled up in her eyes and slowly made their way down her cheek. “L-Luna?” Michael asked, taking a small step towards the emotional alicorn. She closed her eyes and looked downwards towards the floor, before quickly looking back at Michael, hatred burning deep under her skin.

Luna charged forwards, letting out an emotion-fueled shriek, before impaling Michael with her horn. Michael looked down at the spot where he was stabbed. He wasn’t surprised when didn’t feel the pain, this was obviously a dream. It was kind of a pleasant feeling. That’s when things went weird. Michael tried to pull out the horn, but it wouldn’t budge. It was… apart of him. He could feel all of Luna, her muscles, her starry mane, everything.  What fetish did he find while his mind was in the gutter?  Michael started to ponder the dream, and then everything. He looked back down as Luna, and she popped like a balloon. Her horn pulled itself out of his chest cavity and she slowly deflated as she fell to the ground as a rubbery heap. He looked down at the hole in his chest cavity, and he saw another dimension and in it, he saw was himself, looking into a hole in his chest cavity, that had another dimension in it with him looking into a hole in his chest. Michael practically felt the time-space continuum shatter. He sighed and came to terms with himself.

He was crazy.

*  *  *

Michael awoke to the sound of many birds happily chirping. He scratched his head at these sudden dreams. Like, he has had strange dreams before, but never two in a row, especially two that were related. He decided to let it slide for now and look on the positive side.  He felt a bit better than he was yesterday, since moving hurt significantly less. He stretched, before rubbing the his eyes with the back of his palms. He got a strange, tingling on the back of his neck as the hairs stood on end, which was strange, he ever only got that feeling when he was being... watched. Michael scanned the room for peering eyes, but was pulled from his detective work as a pony entered his room.

“Hello, Michael. Celestia asked me personally to take care of you, so I brought you breakfast.” She said with a cheerful smile.

“Why thank you, uh... what’s your name?” Michael asked awkwardly.

“My name is Nurse Redheart, and your welcome,” Redheart said happily,“Now, how are you feeling?” Michael knew that she didn’t want to do this, but only did it because Celestia asked. He could just sense it.

“Much better, actually,” Michael said, looking down at the blue tray she placed in front of him. It had several different bowls, containing an assortment of different vegetables and nuts, but the one thing that did interest him was a jiggly yellow mass. He dipped his plastic spoon into it and brought a piece up to eye level. “What’s this?” He asked, engrossed in the strange matter.

“It’s Hay Jelly,” Nurse Redheart replied.

“Wait a minute, is it actually made out of hay?” He said.

“Well, not completely, that would be preposterous. Hay is just a big ingredient, along with the sugarless sweetener.” She said. He took a small nibble at the piece of jelly on his spoon. It tasted like a muesli bar but a bit sweeter.

“It’s pretty good,” he said, taking several more small nibbles at the spoon. Redheart giggled at his childish behaviour.

“If you ever get bored, there are books in the drawers there,” she said, gesturing to the table next to the bed. Redheart turned and left Michael to his meal. He wasn’t particularly fond of anything she served, nor was he hungry, so he sat the tray onto the table beside him and decided to look around for a novel.

Upon opening the top draw, he found books. Many, many books. He skimmed over the titles. They had a small library in there. Everything, ranging from anatomy counting books. As amazingly interesting counting to three was, he decided to pass. He closed the top draw and slid open the second. This draw was more his style. More, lengthy stories, some mythology and several murder mysteries. Ponies don’t murder… do they?

Michael came across a title that looked interesting, Withering Rose. He pulled the book from out of the draw and propped the pillows up behind him, getting into a comfy position. He flicked to the first page and started to read.

“Michael? Michael are you awake?” He felt a tender hoof poke him in the shoulder.

“No…” he replied sleepily. Michael opened his eyes and saw Nightmare Moon staring back. It was dark but her mane illuminated the room with an enticing blue aura. “Oh, hey there,” he said, stretching out his arms. “What’s up?”

“I am here to -as one would say- ‘chat’, with you,” She replied, seeming unfamiliar with the phrase.

“About?” Michael asked.

“Whatever you wish. I derive great pleasure from your voice. It is… soothing.” She said. Michael wouldn’t have thought his voice was ‘soothing’, but it was still nice to hear somebody to say it.

“Well, I ate Hay Jelly today. It was good.” He said, rubbing his eyes gently. Nightmare Moon just nodded and smiled. “Come on, help me out here. What did you do today?” He said.

“I uh… thought about… things.” She said, staring at the floor as a deep crimson developed on her cheeks. Michael noticed this.

“Oh? What sort of things? Maybe something a little…” Michael leaned in slightly, “saucy?”

“How dare you accuse me of such things!” She said, rearing up a little. Michael held up his hands in defence.

“I’m not accusing, I’m stating.” He said with a smirk.

“Why I ought to-”

“Calm down,” Michael interrupted. “I’m just teasing. If you want to imagine your own little fantasy, that’s fine.” He said. Nightmare Moon huffed with annoyance. Behind those blue eyes, Michael knew he was right, but he decided not to push it any more. They didn’t say anything for a while after that. Michael decided to break the awkward silence.

“Why do you come to see me?”

“I already told you, you interest me,” Nightmare Moon said.

“Yeah, but why? Like, I’m nothing special. Like, dragons. Dragons are cool,” Michael said.

“We have hundreds of dragons, but we only have one of you,” She said, gazing at Michael. He was a little confused at this. Was it a compliment? Was she subtly hitting on him? Nah. Nah? He decided to let it slide.

“Yeah, im pretty amazing,” He said.

“Y-Yes…” She mumbled, directly staring at Michael.

“Uhh, could you stop staring? It’s getting a little weird,” Michael said awkwardly. Nightmare Moon shook her head to stop herself staring.

“Uhh, look at the time, I-I must go,” She said, her eyes darting around the room, before quickly leaving Michael to himself. He was even more confused now, but decided to sleep on it before coming to any rash decisions. Michael hunkered down and closed his eyes. Even with a lot on his mind, sleep still came easy.

* * *

Michael awoke from the greatest sleep he had ever had, this world or not. Even though he wasn’t a morning person, he just had to get up. He was full of energy. Michael jogged down the long hallway and down several flights of stairs, passing several confused doctors. He rushed out the front door, Nurse Redheart on his non-existent tail. Out on the streets, he jogged on the spot while he was looking for Celestia’s castle. He had to tell her the good news. Spotting the front gate, he sprinted down the road.

“Michael? What are you doing here? You should be in hospital!” Celestia said, taken back by Michael’s presence.

“You know this thing, your majesty?” One of the guards asked.

“Oh yes, you can all go back to your posts,” Celestia said. The guards grumbled in complaint, as they left. “What are you doing here, Michael?” Celestia asked again.

“I’m here to tell you the great news!” Michael exclaimed.

“And what is that?” Celestia asked.

“I feel…”

“You feel?” Celestia asked.

“I-I feel…”

“Michael, are you ok?”

“I feel… s-so…”

“Michael!?’

“Cold”

The room violently spun around Michael as he lost his footing. Saliva pooled in the back of his throat as his body hit the floor with a loud thunk. Michael’s breathing became erratic, his lungs filling with vomit. He was thrown into a seizure as his body disobeyed him. Michael felt death coming, as he breathed his final words.

“Help me...”