Luxury

Unbeknownst to you, the morning sun slowly creeps forward, enveloping the room inch by inch until it meets your closed eyes. Its seemingly endless brightness causes you to stir. Grimacing, you bury your face into the couch cushion to your side. The gentle undulation of the short hairs on your chest draws your eyes open. They are met by a sight that makes your heart race.

Soundly sleeping atop you is a pink and orange mare. Though her head is cocked to the side, her chin is elevated enough where her tightly shut eyes look up at you. Upon your chest, a small pool of warm liquid pools just next to where her open mouth rests.

As your racing heart provides more and more blood to your brain, the hazy memories of last night slowly clear. When your memories finally come flooding back to you, you grasp your mane in your hooves, looking up at the ceiling. Breath after breath of air enters and leaves your lungs at a furious pace.

“No…” The word leaves your mouth at a level barely audible. “Please, Goddess. No.”

Moments pass, but neither your mind nor body calms. It feels as if your heart is beating around your stomach when an overwhelming sense that you’ve betrayed the pony you claim to love sets in.

“You could probably never forgive me, but I’m sorry, Lotus.” With those words, a weight is lifted off of your chest. You’re almost hopeful, until you realise the weight was physical and not metaphorical.

“Sweets, why are you crying?” Lily asks, sounding thoroughly confused. As she speaks, she props her head up on a forehoof and shifts her weight to the back of the couch. You are unable to bring yourself to speak to her and barely able to contain yourself. Her free hoof presses softly into your chest as she leans in, nuzzling your face.

Something snaps when her face touches yours. It feels so lackluster, like fur rubbing against fur and nothing more, yet you gave up the constant buzzing feeling that you get just being around Lotus. For that… For nothing.

Without further thinking, you slide out from under the pink mare and gallop into the bathroom. As you go, a quiet yelp can be heard from Lily as she tumbles to the floor, having lost most of the support she had. You quickly lock the door behind you and collapse onto the high pile rug that rests in the center of the white tile floor.

As much as you just want to cry your eyes out, wallowing on the floor in your own self-pity, you aren’t even granted that small amount of comfort. All you can do is whimper as thoughts of your potential happiness with Lotus are completely smashed by your mistake with Lily.

Lotus might have stood you up last night, but your rational self knows that she wouldn’t do that without a really good reason. Like most of your friends, you’ve known her for years, and she wouldn’t do anything to hurt you, would she?

And since when did Lily want to sleep with me?

Your rational self doesn’t seem to be in right now. If you’d like to speak with the emotional mare, please stay on the line, otherwise— A soft knocking at the door interrupts you.

“Sweets,” Lily’s voice calls out, sounding as fragile as you feel right now. A low scraping sound – what you assume to be the sound of a hoof slowly running over wood – emanates from the door after a long bout of silence. “Sweets, please don’t cry.” Another minute of silence passes by before you hear her sniffle.

Heartbreaker.

I’m good at making mare’s cry. Even if I had somepony special, I’d just make them cry. I don’t deserve anypony.

The door rattles and jars as if something pressed up against it. “I meant it when I said that I wanted to make you smile, but I think I took it too far this time. I know this might not mean anything to you and will probably mean even less later, but Sweets, I…” She pauses. “I lo…” Yet again, she stops short.

She can’t be… It didn’t mean anything…

You climb to your hooves and swing the door open just in time to catch Lily as she finally says her piece.

“Sweets, I’m in love with you.” As the door swings open, your eyes meet with hers, the golden orbs going wide in terror.

“You…?”

She nods, running a hoof slowly along your foreleg.

“How could that ever mean ‘less’?” you ask, still taking in the revelation. Her soft stroking of your foreleg immediately stops, and you can feel her begin to shake as she pulls her hoof away.

“I’ve been trying to tell you for so long now. I, uh, nearly kissed you, that day I gave you the morning glory. Somewhere along the line, I figured out that you were falling in love with somepony else, and I had to do something.” The trembling pink pony breaks eye contact and takes a step into the bathroom with you, looking at herself in the mirror with visible disgust.

“I got those seeds from Vinyl Scratch a few days ago. She told me that she gives them out to ponies at her raves and that they generally make ponies feel better. I wanted to make sure they were safe, so I ate a few. They made me feel like I do when I see you smile. I realised what I had to do, though it took some time to come to terms with it.”

What she’s speaking of dawns on you, and it sends a cold shiver down your spine. You instinctively begin to back away from the flower sister as adrenaline makes your heart race through your chest.

“I just wanted you to feel something special, to feel the spark that would make you fall for me.”

“You drugged me under the guise of planting flowers?”

“I didn’t plan on it going as far as it did…” Lily states dejectedly. The shower door rattles in its track as your rump bumps into it, drawing the pink mare’s attention. With tears filling her eyes, she takes a step towards you. “I would never hurt you.”

“You drugged me!”

“I just wanted to make you happy,” she says, softly placing her hoof on you cheek.

“Do I look happy?!” you yell as Lily wraps her hooves around you, in a hug. Your fight-or-flight response kicks in, causing your hoof to act on its own. It plants itself on the mare’s quivering chest and shoves her, along the carpet on which she stands, roughly across the room. Her eyes go wide in terror as she collides with the cabinetry next to the door, sending her crashing to the floor.

Advancing on her, you do your best impression of Princess Luna’s Royal Canterlot Voice, pointing a hoof towards the door. “GET OUT!!” And get out, she does, going as fast as her sore hindlegs can carry her.

***

Lily ran, only stopping to grab the small cooler, that still lay in the same furrow it was abandoned in last night, in her mouth. She truly was a sight as she ran through Ponyville with water splashing from the open container, soaking her face and mane. More than one glance was cast in the pink pony’s direction, including one by two pink and blue mares as they made their way to work.

The flower shop was still closed when she arrived; the sisters spent mornings delivering orders to customers and didn’t normally open up shop until the afternoons. So, when Lily collapsed in the garden, no one was around to see. Her legs simply wouldn’t hold her weight any longer, and between her built-up emotion and the exertion, it felt like her heart was going to explode at any moment.

She might have even welcomed it, if it did, but then, she remembered how she felt last night. She remembered how it felt when her entire body was buzzing with joy and how it felt when she thought that, after so long, her dreams had been achieved. Then, she remembered how she thought that she was going to explode from sheer happiness. She lingered on the feeling of awaking pressed up against the perfect form of the mare she loved.

But… Then her treacherous mind remembered the look in her love’s eyes the next morning and the regret, the resentment, in her voice. Naturally, Lily’s mind replayed the physical and mental pain of when she was thrown into the bathroom counter.

She deserved it, though, and she knew it. Lily wanted love, and not the physical kind, but what she got was not the same, not at all.

Without those Goddess damned seeds, none of this would have happened!

In a flurry of anger the pink pony’s hoof flung the plastic cooler into the air. It pirouetted as it flew, sending its contents in every direction. The mare’s golden eyes, now tinged with red, followed the container’s path until it landed far across the garden.

How could something so beautiful leave me so hollow?

She thought, climbing to her hooves. Lily slowly wandered up and down each furrow, staring at the dark earth the entire time.

Was I so selfish and heartless that I tore out my own heart?

Her eyes caught a batch of yellow carnations up ahead, and as she passed, she trampled the plant into non-existence. Somehow, it made her feel worse, though, and her head hung even lower as she continued onward.

I’ll never feel that way again… Never feel her love.

Her eyes inexplicably locked on a small brown shape in the distance. As Lily drew closer, she recognized the seed half-buried in the dirt. It was one of those things that caused her so much pain. A smug smile formed on the pink mare’s face as she slammed her hoof into it. Though, when she drew her hoof away it was unharmed, lying in the center of her hoof print.

But, it didn’t really make me feel this way, did it? She did.

For a moment, she just stared at it.

It made me feel what she couldn’t, happy.

Her muzzle slowly drew closer to the ground as her lips parted. She drew the seed, and much of the dirt it was resting on, into her mouth, chewing with wild abandon. When the rush washed over her, she breathed a sigh of relief. Almost immediately, Lily spotted another seed and another, and then she saw the cooler. Somehow, most of the seeds still clung to the inside. With yet another relieved breath, she trotted over and ran her tongue along the inside edge of the plastic container. Most of the seeds clung to the wet muscle as it passed by.

Without even thinking, she bit into them at once. The mint flavor was absolutely overwhelming in its strength, causing her to violently cough and heave for air. Lily made for a hose, sure a drink would clear the strong sensation, but she barely made it two steps before her head was spinning so badly that she lost balance and fell into a clump of bright yellow marigold. By the time she had regained her bearings, her hooves were far too weak to move from where she had fallen.

Gray fingers began creep into Lily’s vision as a memory, once again, replayed in her slowing mind.

“Lily, what’s going on?” the chocolate mare said. She was so weak, so helpless.

“Shhh…” Lily whispered as she firmly pressed her lips against the candy pony.