Journal of a Soldier

by SulliedInk

Rating: teen
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Rainbow Dash, Adventure, Dark, Sad, Original Character
Length: 2983

A royal guard's journal is discovered by her daughter, Rainbow Dash.

One day, while fooling around her parent's house, Rainbow Dash discovers the journal of her father Dash Blade, who happened to be a royal guard. After reading it for a while, she finally understands her father a little more, why he left the family and never came back.

Published 2012-05-22 06:24:01 UTC
Last updated 2012-06-16 02:50:11 UTC

Drafted

Day 1

Man! I really can't believe it! I've been selected as a royal guard for her majesty herself. This is really great! I can already see my future ahead of me! All of the glory, fame, and mares swirling around me like bees around flowers. Mother has given me this journal so I may chronicle my adventures. I really look forward to our time together! Oh look at that! They're calling me already. This, dear journal, is the first day of our lives together. This is the beginning of my journey.

***

Day 3

The train to Canterlot is really slow today. Yesterday, I got to meet our captain. He was a really nice colt, and assured me training wasn't that hard. After all, I am the famous Dash Blade! I've earned quite the reputation back home. He was genuinely impressed by my skills. I cannot wait for what lies ahead! And there's the train. I'll have to keep writing later then. Here's to victory! Here's to the rest of our lives!

***

Day 6

Almost a full seven days here at the castle. Training wasn't that hard. I'm already on top of my squad, so they're transferring me somewhere else. Might as well. It's not like anything exciting ever happens at the castle.

***

Day 7

We did it journal! We've survived seven days of training. The higher we climb, the harsher the tasks. I look at my snow white fur covered in mud, and think to myself; it really is great to be part of something big. Every day, I wake up seeking new adventures. This power I now have as a guard... It's something I've never felt before... Is this the feeling of might? Is this the pride one feels after escalating the ladder? I know I'm a great athlete and thinker, but this is much greater than what I've felt before! This is... Wonderful. There is no use hiding my joy and excitement journal. I certainly hope things get even better, for all of us.

***

Day 9

Yeah! Nine whole days since I've left home! For the first time, a higher-up acknowledged my work. Sure, I've been climbing a ladder, but only as a guard. Right now, a sergeant has added my name onto a list of people Celestia is considering to promote. Think about it; I've only been here for nine days, and I'm already getting a promotion! Better go; after all, I don't want to make an even better impression on the higher-ups.

***

Day 10

Today, I heard nasty rumors of disease killing thousands of ponies somewhere far away. The comments I heard from other ponies were less than appropriate for the moment. They didn't feel an inch of disgust, nor sympathy. They upfront told me it wasn't our problem. Yeesh! What jerks! I hope this job doesn't turn me into a monster.

Day 10 (Night)

Whew... I'm too tired to write... After the ceremony, we were partying... It was awesome! But so much booze... And the food... Delicious... Umph... Now I'm stuffed... Good night Journal...

***

Day 11

At lunch today, I was discussing this disease problem with the sergeant and some other elites. Everything went by so fast. I had already climbed up the ladder. Anyways, they said the higher-ups were on their hooves, ready for any sign of serious outbreak. We started talking about our families back home, and what goals we aspire to. When lunch time was over, I was still left haunted with a very important question. I asked the sergeant if this job would turn me into a monster, and he replied: "Well kid, lemme tell y'a this; no soldier ever comes out with clean hooves. Never." I started having real fears.

***

Day 12

Nothing but bad news journal. Apparently, this mysterious disease is spreading fast. It's only a matter of days before it reaches Equestria. I personally don't believe any of these rumors. I fell like this is just some tactic employed by the higher-ups to scare us. Every day, I see the guards below and above me treat these affected ponies as garbage. We were thousands and thousands of miles away. We are Equestrians. We are under the care of Celestia and Luna. We have the strongest military. (After all, I'm in it.) We are better than these other people...right? Oh dear Celestia... I'm starting to become like them. Journal, only you can know of this moment. Only you can know of these feelings journal.

Day 13 (Midnight)

We've been called on duty journal! For them having to wake us up so late at night must mean there is something important! I'll see you later journal. Right now, it's time for some action.

Outbreak

Day 20

I'm so sorry journal for having left you alone for so long. It's just that... These past weeks has been very depressing. I arrive in this small village at midnight, and there they were; ponies, starving on the paved streets. Some were dangling off windows, purposely falling off. The fall crushed their skulls, and splattered blood everywhere. There were others whose limp bodies dangled off a rope around their necks. Then, there were tho ones who feared death, too weak to end their misery.

I knew I had to help them. As soon as I approached one, he pulled a knife and slid a wound in my front leg. The pain felt so instant, I collapsed on the ground. With what little strength remained, I looked up. The sergeant jumped on him, and slid open his throat in cold blood. The others charged at the other wanderers on the streets. They were armed as well. That's when I realized the truth; we didn't come here under diplomacy, we came here to suppress revolution.

The days that followed weren't any better. I saw with my own eyes young widows begging soldiers for food. They were on the ground, crying in despair. Their lament could only fall on deaf ears. Some had caps of torn cloth. The foals, oh so desperate, were taking bites off one another. Naturally, the weakest fell, and became the feast. It was terrible. I never dared ask why we were doing this, for I was afraid to be one of them. Every time I walk the streets, I see them eyeing me, wondering why I couldn't interfere.

That was true fear journal; knowing you're up against something big, and unable to stand ground before it. I can still feel the cold pavement beneath my hooves, the bricks of stone cooler than death, brushing up against my coat. At night, I still hear mice squeaking, worms crawling through my thick fur, and my armor piercing through my flesh. I never had the strength to carry on. I always fell before the end, and they wouldn't care. They had no sympathy. They had no rights for sympathy. Those foals... Just thinking about what will become of them. I'm brushing my head against these warm, fur blankets, fortunate to have been born here, amongst the rich.

Day 21

Things started to change around here. I was given a new promotion. This time however, I didn't feel too happy about it. There are still so many things I need to tell you Journal. Out there on my own, amongst these ponies I barely knew. We were welcomed by spears and bludgeons. The pegasi, unicorns, and earth ponies watched as their husbands, brother, and other siblings took arms, only to die at the hands of their protectors. Even the rain couldn't wash away the blood on my hooves.

For the first time, I felt alone, powerless against these forces moving everything around. It was a cruel reality. Now, of all days, I finally understood a fundamental concept taught to us at school; for there to be life, things must also die. Chills still run down my spine. I've only been back for a day, and yet I feel like I've been gone for years. Everything is happening so fast.

I saw some of these other ponies bite the dust. The arms race kept escalating. On both end, better weapons were developed. Every day, we fought violent brawl amidst the paved streets. The angels above us must really pity our cause, for many tears were shed from the heavens above, as I watched them all die, one by one. And the foals... Oh what little innocence left flourished crushed by war and disease. I couldn't stand my ground. I could only frown.

We had come not to save a people; we had come to silence it. Without them, this disease couldn't spread. Without them, these voices would never leave the vicinity of the city. Without them... Without our innocence...

Day 24

Sorry I couldn't write yesterday journal. Unfortunately, I have only come back to tell you I shall be gone once more. Today, I read an interesting tome. It was a long, detailed work about these mythical equines of old; alicorns. They say the ala-cornus once descended from the earth above, and taught mortals what they know today. One day, the mortals grew envious of them, and themselves. They rebelled, and drove the alicorns to extinction.

I closed the book. Mortals... We really are cruel being... Violence only amounts to violence. It keeps spinning round in a cycle, just as the seasons come and go. But violence never truly goes, for mortals will always have a reason to bring it back. I sigh before our foolishness.

Yet somehow, I am still relieved to have survived. Those things we've done, they are done right? We've stopped the disease! We've stopped the outbreak! We... We... We killed the voice of the tortured... I... I helped kill the voice of the tortured...

Day 25

We have to go now, but this time, I'll be taking you with me. Journal, you will be the book of my despair, chronicling my rise and fall. I have no idea where we will end up. I have no idea whether or not we shall live. However, the only wish I have is that you end up somewhere safe. I wish... I wish you could teach these others about my mistakes. It hasn't even been a month, yet I feel like it's been an eternity.

Day 30

I see nothing but sorrow and misery ahead. Things are getting worse. More and more ponies have been affected by this curse. It's only been six days, but I've already traveled to many places, all worse than the last. By my lance, I had to kill them. Every night, I hear blood dripping. Each splash was worth a life. I can hear the rain outside. Heaven cries before the fool's wicked acts. Heaven mourns the loss of life. Heaven mourns the loss of sanity.

***

Rainbow Dash set the journal down aside. When she did, a picture came out from between the pages. The mare grabbed it, oblivious to the calls of her mother. On the photograph was a white stallion and an azure mare. Rainbow recognized her mother, still in her youth. She bore the innocent smile of a newborn foal. Next to her however, the stallion's eyes were hidden by his golden helmet. Tears dripped down his eyes. He was cringing.

"Dad..." she said to herself. "You were trying to smile, weren't you?" She flipped the picture over. Someone had scribbled a note, which read: "To my wife and future daughter to be. Do not remember me as soldier, but rather as a father, and as a husband." It was Dash's turn to cry.

Descent

Rainbow set the journal aside, wiping off her tears with her hoof. A part of her wanted to know more, but the other told her it was enough. It was time to go. Her mother called, saying supper was finally ready. Dash knew she needed to rest for her wonderbolt show tomorrow. Afar, she heard her mother's hoofsteps coming up the stairs. Rainbow Dash quickly tossed the journal beneath her bed, and rushed past her mother downstairs.

The latter was curious as to how her daughter managed to stay silent for such a long period of time. She snuck into Rainbow's room. A calm, gentle breeze blew by. The white curtains swayed with the wind. Her covers were wrinkled, indicating she had sat there for quite some time. The mare approached her daughter's nightstand. By the lamp lay the old photo. The elderly mare brushed her hoof over the picture. From outside, a rose petal found it's way into Dash's room, and landed on the old photograph. Rainbow's mother whispered: "So you finally know..." A single tear landed on the picture.

***

It was night already. Rainbow Dash was done with her show. She had come home to rest, and enjoy some family time. Soon, she and the Wonderbolts would go on a worldwide tourney. Finally, after her mother comfortably tucked her in, she snuck out a flashlight, grabbed the journal, and continued reading.

***

Day 42

This very morning, my blood-stained hooves walked against the shivering cold tiles of the ceremonial room. I felt our highest ranking general's cold limbs around my neck, as he awarded me with a medal. I realize now just how horrible things were. Me, the very pony who once admired the knights, have come to fear and loathe the very beings I once idolized. I never knew such horrid acts were possible. I was awarded for killing others, for keeping their voices and concerns at bay. I was no hero, but rather an aging murderer. Physically, I might look stronger and better built than ever before. Alas, the innocence I had when I first came has since vanished in the passing breeze. They were right; we really can't go back the way we came. Now what Journal? Do we keep pushing ahead, knowing there may be no path for us to follow? And once we're at the peak, gazing upon the world below, where shall we go next. I sigh as I collapse on my bed. Downwards. That's where we will go; downwards. Into the abyss, a place where nobody comes out the same. I ask you Journal; is this the meaning of a soldier's life?

Day 45

Finally, I've returned today. We were ordered to hone our fighting skills, so the higher-ups threw us in the middle of the Everfree forest, and told us to survive. We did. I had to cook and eat snakes, rabbits, and various other small creatures. I can't believe it's only been 45 days since we left. Yet, in such a short time, I feel like I've aged beyond my years. I look back at who I was 45 days ago, and realize how different we are. I don't know where the others are right now, since we came here blindfolded. All I have is a small knife, and a few matches. I'm starting to run out of the latter however. I must find some flint, or anything that came help me light a fire. It's getting late, and I should rest. Better recover my energy quickly to stay vigilant. Good night, dear Journal.

Journal

"Mom!" shouted Rainbow Dash. "How can you live here?! It's soooooo boring!" Her elder mother sighed. She walked over to the kitchen, and prepared a bowl of soup for her beloved daughter. They hadn't seen each other too often ever since her child joined the Wonderbolts. Upon that thought, the elder mare smiled. She thought of those days, long ago, when she ventured the world herself, trying to find her path in life.

"Well Dashie, some people just like the calm countryside," she replied. "Why don't you go through your old belongings and see if there's something valuable you'd like to bring on your trip." Exasperated, Rainbow Dash climbed the stairs to the second floor. Right before turning into her room, she noticed an old ladder leading to a moldy gate. The attic huh... Well, since I'm 'old enough' now, might as well take a peek. The young pegasus climbed the old, yet still sturdy ladder, and with a single hoof, pushed open the damp, rotten wood.

There was so much dust in there that Dash couldn't see anything. She promptly decided to flap her wings and clear some out. To her surprise, it worked. Rainbow went back downstairs to grab a lantern. Finally, she could explore this place long forbidden to the inner filly inside. Everything was covered in plastic. The walls had not aged well, but the contents of the room did. However, they were way too dusty to distinguish what it could have been. Rainbow Dash looked up. The ceiling was barely a meter and a half higher that she was. At the left end of the room however, was a leather-covered book, sitting on a perfectly preserved ebony podium.

Curious, Dash advanced towards the tome of leather, and found out it was actually a journal. When she opened the cover, the pegasus noticed initials smudged in damp ink. Something cracked behind her. Startled, Dash dropped the lantern. The light source was too tightly sealed to burst open. Rainbow swore she heard someone speak softly to her ear. Scared by her surreal environment, she grabbed her lantern, the book, and scrammed downstairs faster than a bolt of lightning.

Alone in her room, she opened the book once more. The pages had ages quite well, remaining legible yet cool enough to brag about. Rainbow Dash flipped through the pages. At the very end, someone's name was written; Dash Blade. Immediately, the mare recognized her father's name. That stupid asshole... I'll never forgive him for leaving mom like that! Unfortunately, curiosity took over, as she flipped back to page one, and began reading what appeared to be a journal of her father's journey.