The Best Kind is Apple

by Gumball2

Rating: everyone
Tags: Maud Pie, Pinkie Pie, Slice of Life, Applejack, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 2434

After going through the Pie family records, it turns out that Pinkie is Applejack's fourth cousin twice removed by a fifth cousin. This marks the start of a new relationship between the two families.

Even after becoming an honorary Apple, Pinkie still wonders whether the Apples and Pies are actually related. When the Pie family records are given a thorough look, however, it turns out that the two families share some relatives.

With this information, Applejack's relationship with Pinkie is forever changed as she now has a new set of cousins, aunts, and uncles.

Submission for The Harmonists' June Contest

Published 2015-06-19 22:00:01 UTC
Last updated 2016-01-19 01:20:49 UTC

Apple Pie

Thousands of trees were scattered throughout Sweet Apple Acres, all standing tall with ripe fruits hanging from their branches. Applejack's eyes focused on the first one she saw. She stepped off her front porch—a basket on her back—and walked toward it. Despite the early sun's low position, her body was free of exhaustion and was filled with a fresh energy waiting to burst out. Upon reaching the tree's rigid bark, she turned and propped her legs up. She kicked back, pounding the tree with a tremendous power. The apples tried in vain to keep from falling and struck the ground with muffled thuds.

"Hey cousin!"

Applejack looked up, away from the tree's harvest, to see a small pink pony galloping toward her. She stood there and watched the figure get bigger and bigger until it lunged at her, causing her to stumble back.

"Hi!"

The tight hug didn't quite dig into Applejack's hard chest but it elicited a grin from her. She raised one of her hooves and stroked it along her friend's back.

"Mornin', Pinkie," she said.

"You're never gonna believe what I have to tell you!" Pinkie said, further squeezing Applejack's skin.

"Yeah," she said, "wut is it?"

Pinkie pulled her in tighter and giggled. After a moment, she moved back, showing her jitter smile.

"Well remember when i found out that I might have been your fourth cousin twice removed by a fifth cousin?" she asked.

She nodded.

"Yes, yes I do," she said, thinking about a chaotic trek down the river, the many things going wrong, and that dreaded blotched name, "It was perfect."

"I was really glad to be an honorary Apple," she said, "and I mean glad. But then I started to think about that name no one could read and it really got me thinking 'What if I was a real Apple?'"

Applejack couldn't help but chuckle.

"Pinkie," she said, "you know yer an Apple no matter wut."

"I know," she said, her smile never wavering, "but I just couldn't help it. Those words kept popping up in my Pinkie little head. But since that silly name was all blotched, I asked myself 'How could I find out for sure?' and then I thought really hard for a while. And I mean hard! But then it hit me. I could check the Pie family records. And then I wrote a letter to my parents and asked them if I could have them. I told them all about you and Apple Bloom and Granny Smith and Big Mac and all the Apples. I also told them about that crazy adventure we had as a family and how I became an honorary Apple. And just this morning, I got a letter back from my Mom!"

She stopped and waved the folded paper in the air, allowing the intense force to crumble it.

"She said that she looked through the records, looking for one of the many Apples I wrote about. And she found one!"

In a flash, her forelegs pulled Applejack in once more. Her eyes widened briefly before settling down to accept the gesture.

"So I came right on over," she said calmly, "to say 'Hi' to my fourth cousin twice removed a fifth cousin," she paused. Her smile widened and her head rested against Applejack, "Hi cousin."

Applejack was slow to speak; her friend's entire ramble was still rushing into her head. For a minute, she couldn't help but lean against Pinkie, depending on her body to remain standing. Her face was a stone, unable to move. Butt hen her own lips stretched out and her own eyes drooped. Her hooves lifted from the ground and rested on Pinkie's back.

"Hello," she said as she allowed her head to fall into Pinkie's shoulder, "er...cousin."

Applejack felt her neck being enveloped by the other's forelegs. The warm embrace enticed her to tighten it.

"I would love for you and the others to come to the rock farm some time," Pinkie said, rubbing her cousin's neck.

Applejack, however, couldn't help but look up at the field before her, full of unbucked trees. Even with the orange morning sun searing her right eye and shadowing them, she saw them before her.

"Ah have to work today," she said while looking at the yield.

"I know, silly," Pinkie said, "Maybe after harvest season is over. Me, you, Apple Bloom, Bic Mac, Granny Smith. Oh! And who could forget the girls?"

Applejack nodded her head.

"Okay then."

Pinkie's eyes popped open and she broke away from her cousin.

"I just got a great idea!" she said.

"Really? What is it?" Applejack asked, staring directly at Pinkie.

"You could start writing letters to the Pie family. I write them all the time, so it's like we're always together!" she said as she gripped Applejack's forelegs, "I could give you the address to the farm and you can start writing today."

"Well alright. Would ya care to write it down?" Applejack asked.

Pinkie smiled and hoofed her the paper.

"It's on the bottom of this!" she said.

Upon receiving the letter, she opened it and stared at the lower right corner of it. Within seconds, she noticed the address written in shoddy black quillmareship.

"31 Neighman Road

Nickerlite, MN 51074"

Applejack scanned through it several times, iterating the road, town, province, and zip code over and over. Afterward, she gave it back to Pinkie.

"Go inside and put it on the table," she said, "Ah'll read it over after ah do some buckin'."

"Okay!" Pinkie said, her eyes closing. For a short while, they remained closed despite the apparent relaxation of her face. Eventually, though, they did reopen. She then trotted toward the Apple house. Applejack watched her moving, never breaking eye contact until she had knocked on the door and been let in by Granny Smith. She then turned back to the fallen apples and the basket.

"Cousin, huh," she said, starting to pick up a red apple, "cousins, uncles, aunts, a family ah never knew ah had."

It took about a minute to get all the apples into the bucket. All the while, she didn't think. But then, after finishing the simple action, she paused.

"Ah guess whether it's apples or rocks, farmin' is what runs in this family."

Applejack trudged into her moonlit room, the letter and a blank sheet in hoof. Her focus was primarily on the wooden desk standing against the wall by the window. She sat down and grabbed a match. Using a striker nearby, she lit it, producing a flame. She placed the young ember over a candlestick. Immediately, the entire desk was showered in a dim glow.She then placed both papers on it, took out the quill, and wrote.

"To the Pie Family

31 Neighman Road

Nickerlite, MN 51074"

Applejack put down the quill and stared at the white parchment before her.

"Wut do ah say?" she asked herself, "Hey, ah'm yer niece and yer children's cousin?"

She was a tree trunk, staring at the paper without motion. The sheet was much like a puzzle. After some contemplation, she picked up the quill and hovered it over the paper.

"Howdy, family" she said while still holding the dry quill. She sat there for another moment before sighing. Her eyes gazed to the left but she forced them back forward. The quill started to waver in her hoof before she pressed it against the sheet's white surface.

"Howdy," she wrote. She paused for a breath before continuing, "my name is Applejack and I live in Ponyville. I'm good friends with Pinkie. It was just today that I found out I was a part of your family."

She stopped and read over what she had written.

"Where next?" she asked. But the paper was silent and unhelpful. Her mind raced in a desperate search for her own answer. Luckily, though, she was able to move on.

"I wish to get to know you fellows better, so I hope you all would write. Pinkie would love for me and the Apple family to meet you sooner or later."

She lifted the quill from the sheet and moved her hoof over to the bottom of the page.

"Sincerely,

Applejack"

She rested the quill on the table, pushed her chair back, and reached out to a drawer built into it. She opened it and took out a blank white envelope. Taking the quill, she dipped it in a bottle of black ink and pressed it against the envelope.

"The Pie Family

31 Neighman Road

Nickerlite, MN 51074"

Turning to the back side, she opened the flap. She took the letter, folded it, and slid it in.

"Ah can't wait ta read back," she said to herself, smiling. She got up and blew out the candle. Even in the darkness, she could make out her bed thanks to its darker silhouette and the minimal light provided by the moon. She approached it and snuggled herself beneath the soft blankets. She lied there as sleep made its comforting arrival.

Spreading the News

A gray mare awoke. Her vision was slow to refine itself, making the door and bed rest before her look like unknown masses. But soon enough, they became a door and bed rest. She got up and dressed herself in a simple blue dress. She then left the room.

It was a short walk through the hallway' three doors before the right turn and down the the stairs. Immediately at the end of the steps was a wall that was covered with mailing slots. The mare faced the door at the end of the room and walked. She continued the stride until she halted. She turned to a particular slot that read "Maud Pie". She opened it and saw a single envelope inside. She pulled it out and read.

"Hi Maud,

I had the greatest day two days ago! I woke up and Gummy said he misses you. I told him that I miss you too but you would soon be home for Hearth's Warming Eve.

The rest of the day was pretty good. I went to Twilight at the library, I hung out with Rarity, and Rainbow Dash and I did some good old pranking. Oh yeah, and I also had lunch with Fluttershy and Applejack. It was very yummy!

The girls all say they miss you too. Maybe they could come with us too! How was your day?

Love,

Pinkie"

Maud was left with a smile which, while not big, was genuine. She took the paper, carefully folded it, and slid it back into the envelope. The envelope was then snugged into a pocket in her dress.

"New relatives," a brown stallion said, reading over some papers for the fifth time. She then turned to a mare, who was sitting in a chair next to him, "Is Pinkamena sure those names in the letter are right?"

"Yes, Igneous," she said, "Pinkamena is not one to deceive us."

He read over the records once more. The connection was a clear, sunny sky; one that was much brighter than the one of Nickerlite, "The fillies have a new set of fourth cousins twice removed by fifth cousins. I have reason to be surprised, even in doubt. Right?"

"They're in the records. The Pie family is never wrong with things like this."

"I know," he said. He scanned through the records one last time, just to make sure there was no mistake, "I found it strange, though, that the Apple family would have a blotched name in it."

"I think it's odd as well," she said, "but we can't control how they do things."

She then got up and went to a desk.

"Are you writing to her?" he asked. She nodded her head and grabbed a piece of paper from a stack of paper on the table, "Okay then."

She rested the single sheet on its surface and got her hooves on a quill.

"If only I could see her face once she reads this," she said to herself as she dabbed the utensil in black ink.

The trees near the main walkway were still being bucked. And there were still many rows behind them. Applejack took her time, though, going up to them one at a time. She stared at the bark before proceeding to kick it. Every so often, she turned toward the end of the dirt road, where a mailbox stood. Throughout the morning, she got closer and closer to that post. She bucked a tree, went to the next. Bucked a tree, went to the next. She got closer. And closer to it.

She then got to it and opened it. Inside she saw a white envelope with her name on it. Curious, she pulled it out and produced a piece of paper from its interior.

"To Applejack,

We are happy to get a letter from our relative. Since you would to know the Pie family in whole, each of us will introduce ourselves to you. I am Cloudy Quartz and I am Pinkamena's mother."

She then noticed a line break, followed by a paragraph of cruder hoofwriting.

"I am Igneous and I am Pinkamena's father."

And then another.

"I am Marble and I am Pinkamena's sister."

"I am Limestone and I am also Pinkamena's sister."

But then the following paragraph returned to the first style.

"Pinkamena has another sister named Maud. She told us you met her so I think you know what she's like."

"Ah sure do."

"I am sure Pinkamena has told you that she is studying for her rocktorate at Canterlot University."

She paused. Her eyes widened to the point where the entire paper was one entity, devoid of any meaning. She reread that very sentence as she thought about Maud's brief stay in Ponyville.

"She may know 'bout rocks an' all, but wow..."

Eventually, she managed to refocus on the letter.

"Pinkamena is ecstatic to know she has a relative and there's nothing that warms out hearts more than to see our little sunshine happy. She really wants us to meet you and possibly your family at some point. Obviously, we would like you to pick the date. If you are interested, please write back soon.

Sincerely,

The Pie Family"

Finishing the note, she smiled. In her eyes, it was nice to hear back from what appeared to be kind people. She folded the letter, slid it in the envelope, and secured it under her hat.

"Yes," she said to the paper, "we will meet.