Chapters The Sands of Saddle Arabia
“Faster, girls, faster!” I yelled in a terrible panic, as the four of us galloped away from our sinister pursuer at full speed. “It’s gaining on us!”
Did you ever have one of those days, where things never seem to go right? It’s the days where you get out of bed in the morning, with a hopeful and good feeling about the day, and then everything just suddenly all goes straight to heck? This has really been one of those days, and I just can’t believe how wrong things have gone from what we had originally planned.
“Oh skit ! Paradise, ze mummy pursuer, he is closing in on us!” Daffodil screamed, in that thick accent of hers. “Ve have to run vaster, or ve are nefer going to make it!”
We must be quite the sight; a quartet of terrified mares in different colored harem costumes and translucent veils, running through the passageways of an ancient crumbling stone pyramid, as a creepy decomposing undead stallion in bandages ever- so-slowly closed in on us. We are lost in these endless maze of corridors and hallways, running for our lives from the terror we accidentally released from that sarcophagus in the burial chamber. And we’re desperately looking for the entrance that will lead us back to freedom, and the bight light and sunshine of the outside world once more.
But there doesn't seem to be a way out of the endless, torch-lit corridors. No doorway that resembles the portal we passed though to first enter this accursed place, no pathway that will take us away from these torch-lit chambers and back to the dry and hot desert beyond these ancient walls. It's almost as if... as if this still and silent place were alive, it's hieroglyph-covered walls almost seem to be shifting and moving around as we run desperately for our lives. The other three are keeping pace behind me, following hot on our hooves as we desperately try to dash our way to freedom!
Our goofy blonde Pegasus friend is, as usual, certainly not trying to be of any real help to any of us.
“Gee whiz Vanilla, maybe he just wants some of your cofee!” Surprise giggled, flapping ahead and zipping circles around the rest of us. “His stomach probably gets kinda thirsty out here in this dry old desert, ya know!”
“Oh shut up you, blonde bimbo!” Our group’s lone unicorn spat, as the mummy’s howls filled the chamber behind us. “We wouldn’t be in this mess if you hadn’t opened that mummy’s crypt up in the first place!”
“Hey! It was all colorful and pretty! I thought there was candy inside!” Surprise protested angrily, snapping back at the other mare. “How was I supposed to know it was just some dead guy?!”
Oh dear…. I thought this trip to Saddle Arabia would be just the vacation the girls and I needed. The four of us were just begging for some time off, as we were all bored with our regular everyday humdrum routines. Some time away from the bright and sunny land of Ponies, for a vacation that would be a real change of pace. But the four of us thought we'd all be sitting under a palm tree, eating dates and pomegranates fed to us by rich stallion sheiks in turbans. Instead, we're all running from our lives from a moldy thousand-year-old pharaoh hell-bent on doing something truly foul to us. If I would've known our vacation would end up like this, I never would've let us leave port!
"Uh, oh! I think we just hit a dead end!" I wailed, as we came to a screeching halt. "I don't see any other way we can go!"
"Can't you wink us out of here, Vanilla?" Daffodil asked hysterically, as the shadowy form closed in on the small room, with no other way out. "I don't want to end up zome long dead pharaoh's hustru !"
"I can't wink us out, Daff!" The other mare responded, abject terror reflected in her trembling voice. "We unicorns can't teleport around in an enclosed space like this!"
"Aieeee! This is the end, I just know it! We're all gonna be ground up into mummy burgers!" Surprise squeaked, as the mummified stallion stepped through the doorway. "Wait, maybe we could communicate with him through song! Anyone here know the human song 'walk like an Egyptian'?"
Oh, what a sight we were- two white Pegasus, a white unicorn, and blue earth pony... all of us, quivering in the corner like four scared fillies. It's a good thing all of our faces were hidden beneath our veils, so that lurking behemoth couldn't see our looks of absolute fear. This isn't how the brochure made this trip sound. So far, we've been chased by desert pony Bedouins, almost eaten alive by crocodiles and attacked by hippos on a river journey, and put into a crazy sultan's harem with a bunch of his other mares. If this is what a vacation is like, I never want to leave my normal old boring life again!
"Graaagggh!" The mummy growls, shuffling towards us menacingly. As the walking relic opens it's mouth, a most foul and odious stench emanates from inside the creature's open jaw.
"Ewwwww, that's gross!" Daffodil commented, holding her hoof over her nose. "When's the last time you had a breath mint, Nightmare Moon's Banishment?"
Seeing as my friends and I are about to become a mummy's supper, I can only help but remember how this whole mess started. How a simple desert vacation snowballed into one of the biggest adventures of our lives. It would be a wonderful story to write down some day, if I even live long enough to tell it, and fill up one of those exciting adventure books I always like to read. Dare I take the time to recall all of the horrors that have befallen us over the course of this dreadful week past? Should I spend my last few precious seconds upon this world, recalling the unfortunate sequence of events that led my dear companions and I into this moment of malady?
Well, it unfortunately seems I really have nothing better to do with my time right now.
My name is Paradise Oasis, and this is our story....
The Sands of Saddle Arabia
"Wow this sea air is sooo amazing!" Surprise giggled, standing up on the ship's bow, her hooves and her wings spread. "I, like, thought being on a sea would sooo totally be boring! Can you believe how boring that sounded, being out in the middle on the ocean with nothing but water? But then Paradise said it would totally be fun, and I knew Paradise wouldn't lie to me, and she was so like totally right! The waves, the fish, the rocking of the boat! I can't believe how totally-super-duper-fun and awesome it is out here!"
"Surprise, would you please try to control yourself?" Paradise grumbled, rolling her eyes as she looked up from the ma. "We were extremely lucky to get a ride on this voyage, and I won't have you misbehaving!"
The four mares were traveling on a pink and white sailing vessel, lying the deck chairs in their bikinis, and enjoying the sunshine and clear skies overhead. After some initial seasickness at the start of the trip, the result of the ship bouncing up and down on the waves, they finally seemed to have settled in and begun to enjoy the journey.
"Huh, this is strange. Not even a single stallion has looked at us yet." Paradise sighed in a disappointed tone, lifting her sunglasses with her left wing, and looking around. "Maybe we should have worn skimpier swimsuits?"
"First of all, Paradise, I don't think stallions care about how reveling our outfits are- we don't normally wear any clothes." Vanilla grumbled, glaring at the other mare in annoyance. "Secondly, would you please stop thinking about boys? You're starting to remind me of Firefly!"
"Aw, don't blame Paradise vor her desperation, Vanilla!" Daffodil said with a laugh. "It's not her vault she hasn't been on a date zince the paleopony period!"
"Ha ha, very funny!" Paradise grumbled, putting her shades down. "I bet you two don't get any guys looking at you, either!"
The continued to lie there for several hours, enjoying the peaceful splashing of the waves. It was about midday when the captain walked over to the other three ponies, smiling warmly as she greeted them.
"I hope everything is satisfactory for you and your friends, Miss Paradise." Main Sail, a mare with a blonde mane and blue coat, greeted them. "We're so happy to be having such a quartet of distinguished guests from Ponyland!"
"Oh, think nothing of it, my good Captain Sail!" Paradise replied, gesturing to her other two friends who were lying on two deck chairs in their bikinis. "We're just happy to be going along, isn't that right, girls?"
"Oh, Ja ! I be lovin to take a trip on zee ocean, yah!" The Swedish pony grinned, popping a potato chip into her mouth. "It's zo vuderbar zhat vou offered to take us to ze kingdom of Zaddle Arabia!"
"Yeah, I've been wanting to learn some of the famous coffees of Saddle Arabia, it'll really spruce up the menu at my cafe!" The unicorn agreed ecstatically. "My customers are dying to try something new and exotic on our menu!"
"I would be careful there if I were you, ladies." The captain warned cautiously. "I've heard some very unsavory things about the Saddle Arabians, and their strange customs. I'd watch my back, if I were you."
"Awww, they really couldn't be that bad, right?" Surprise commented, trotting back to the aft deck. There, she noticed a large table filled with foods of every kind. "Ohhhh, sweet! Girls, it's a buffet!"
"That is a complimentary meal, for all of our passengers and crew." Main Sail replied with a smile, gesturing with her hoof towards the table covered with sandwiches, drinks, and deserts. "Feel free to help yourselves."
"Yipee!" The white Pegasus yelled in triumph, jumping onto the table like a shark onto a school of fish. "Omnomnomnomnom-!"
"Surprise, no! That food is not just there for you!" Vanilla protested, trying to pull her friend off the baked goods. "Leave some for the rest of us!"
"Say, vhat did you mean vhen you zaid 'unsavory', und 'strange customs'?" Daffodil asked, as Surprise picked up the whole table with her hooves, to empty it into her mouth.
"Well, they seem to be a little primitive and backward- a bit on the barbaric side, I've heard." The captain replied, swishing her tail around in agitation. "It's due to stallions being in charge of things in that herd, I suppose."
"Stallions? In charge?" Paradise laughed. "Most stallions couldn't find their way out of a paper bag without a mare to lead them!"
"Vou are zelling zhem short, Paradise." The earth pony replied, looking over at her skeptical friend. "Male ponies are much more capable than you realize."
"I've also heard stories of mares disappearing in that place." The captain shivered, trying not to think too much about it. "Single girls go to visit Saddle Arabia... and never return!"
"Wow, that sounds really silly!" Surprise giggled, setting the now-empty table back down on the floor. "Those mares couldn't have just disappeared into thin air, they gotta be somewhere!"
"Nooooo, I wanted to try some of those lettuce and tomato sandwiches!" Vanilla cried, looking down at the empty plates the Pegasus had left behind. "Next time, I'm packing our meals for the voyage!"
"Better be a little quicker if you want the food next time, Vanilla!" Paradise teased her, before turning back to the others. "Wow, I just can't wait till we get there- the ancient pyramids to explore, the colorful bazaars, the exotic dancing!" The mare nearly drooled at the thought. "I can almost picture it now..."
"You won't want to imagine it any more , after you've paid a visit on the Saddle Arabians." The captain told them with a sigh, before trotting away. "but you've heard my warning, and I'll say no more."
"Huh, I starting to vonder if it vas such a good Idea to come along vith you on this vacation, Paradise." Daffodil told her with a sigh. "Maybe ze rest of us zhould haf gone to Equestira on vacation, instead."
"Oh, you're worrying too much, Daff. We'll be fine." Paradise rolled her eyes. "What, do you think we're going to run into some trouble while we're here?"
"Hey, look everybody! I'm gonna do a high dive!" Surprise climbed up on the bow, and leapt off into the ocean. "Wheeee! Lookout below!"
"SURPRISE! ARE YOU CRAZY!?" Twist yelled out in a panic, as all three mares ran to the rail. "There's sharks down there!"
They all saw the hungry beasts with teeth all leap in the direction of the hysterically laughing mare, followed by the sounds of a lot of struggling and splashing. Surprise was then launched right back up onto the deck, without a scratch or mark on her.
"Good gravy! Are you all right, girl?" Daffodil asked in a panic. "Vhat the ehck happened down zhere?"
"Seems the sharks thought I tasted really bad!" Paradise replied, a goofy grin on her face. "Guess I shouldn't of eaten those two Maretonian burritos last night!"
"Ewww, Surpise, that's gross!" Twist snorted, looking away in disgust!"
"Hey, girls, look!" Paradise exclaimed, pointing a hoof towards the approaching shoreline. "There's the Saddle Arabian coast, I think we're here!"
And as the boat approached the misty shore, the four mares aboard had no idea what was in store for them....
The Sands of Saddle Arabia
"Wow this is so amazing!" Vanilla squealed, as they pulled into port. "I just can't believe how big this place is!"
The four mares trotted off the boat, arriving in a city filled with light, sounds, and color. Ridejah- the great capital of the Saddle Arabian Sultanate, and the very center of their nomadic desert culture. Minarets and great domes rose over the landscape before them, with row after row flat-roofed houses lining every street. As the ponies trotted farther in from the docks, they notices hundreds of horses of both sexes trotting about the streets wearing ornately decorated saddles and reins; the males also in a fez , the females wearing colored translucent veils. It looked like something out of an enchanted fairy tale to the four Ponylanders.
"Vow, this place iz incredible !" Daffodil added, as she looked around at all of the different and exotic equines. "Ziz looks like a vonderful place to just zhpend all day exploring!"
"Hey girl, lookie over here!" Surprise exclaimed excitedly, flapping her wings and zipping forward from place to place excitedly. "This is really cool! Take a look at this! And this! And this! And this!"
The other ponies were pulled along from one wonder to another, from a snake charming earth pony who raised a cobra out of a basket, to a sword-swallowing unicorn who carefully levitated the blades down his throat. Every twist and turn through the labyrinth of narrow streets led to a new oddity, each block the mares traversed brought new perfumes and smalls of incense to their dainty little equine noses. It felt like the start of a truly wonderful adventure!
"Gosh, why in the world are all these ponies so tall?" Vanilla asked curiously, looking around at all of the equines they passed. "I mean, even the girls are taller than our biggest stallions back home!"
"These ponies are descended from the old horses of Saddle Arabia, 'Nilla." Paradise replied, watching a stallion in a turban walk across hot coals in his bare hooves. "They're still a little bit bigger and more horse-like than us, even after generations of intermarrying with ponies."
"Zhat explains vhy zeez ponies looks so lankyund zickly looking!" Daffodil whinnied, looking around at all of the Oriental ponies all around them. Suddenly, the surprised mare's eyes. "Ohhhh ,girls! Look vhat iz coming ziz vay!"
All four of the girls just stared at him- a lithe green body, taught flank muscles, and a long pink mane that seemed to sway in the gentle desert breeze. Surprise and Paradise's wings were reflexively outstretched, standing at full attention, while Vanilla and Daffodil just stared at him with their mouths hanging wide open. They simply stared at him blankly, until the vision of masculine perfection before them began to speak.
"Salam and good afternoon to you, my good mares." The stallion greeted them, bowing slightly as he did so. "I take it you are the most honorable Paradise, and her most worthy companions?"
"Y-yes..." Paradise barely responded, staring dreamily into his eyes. "W-we are here on vacation, and..."
"I am well aware of why you are here, most noble of mares. My name is Merry Moments, and I am here to see you to the place where you shall be dwelling while you are a guest in these lands." The earth pony reached for the luggage Vanilla had been levitating, and used his mouth to load it onto his back. "Please, allow me to take you bags, and follow me."
"Did... did an angel just talk to us?" Vanilla asked, a dumbfounded look on her face. "I've never seen anything so handsome..."
"Zhat... zhat fellow has a very, very cute bakkvartsparter , und I'm better he hast a very fine onämnbar , as vell." Daffodil noted, staring after the stallion as he walked. "I-I zink ve should be qvik in in following him, ja?"
"H-he's like Rudolph Valentino, in pony form..." Paradise agreed, as they slowly trotted after the stallion. "This trip is going to be even more amazing than I thought..."
"Okay, here's how we'll work it!" Surprise whispered to the other girls, flapping after the group. "Vanilla can have him Monday night, Daff, can have him on Tuesday evening, and... Paradise? You want Wednesday, or can I-"
"SURPRISE!" All three of the other girls hissed at once, their faces blushing a deep red. "How could you even think something like that?!"
"Oh, come on!" The white Pegasus hissed back quietly, so the stallion ahead of them couldn't hear. "Like all of you weren't thinking the same thing!"
"Zurprise, vou little blonde airhead, I did not come along on ziz trip zo zome stallion und I could... could...." The Hastlander mare sighed, rolling her eyes, and trying to hide her blush. "Fine, morgondag natt, han tas gruva älskare ."
"All right, I'll take the next day." Paradise grumbled, scowling angrily at the other Pegasus. "Surprise, you're stuck with the day after."
"Cool! That means Vanilla gets the end of the week!" Surprise whispered excitedly. "Isn't that great, 'nilla?"
The unicorn mare only stared back in silent anger, her face a shade redder them all of the other girls combined.
...
The large house was a two story structure, filled with many rooms, and windows that looked out on every corner of the city. The girls couldn't believe the many beautiful tapestries that hung on the walls, and the many colorful rugs of different shapes and sizes that decorated the floor.
"Wow, actual Saddle Arabian Carpets!" Surprise exclaimed, looking at the elaborately woven piece of work beneath her hooves. "Do ya think they have to nail these things down, to keep them from flying away?"
"Well, I would say that the many oriental rugs we weave are magical, but they're not that magical!" A voice called out behind them, causing all of the mares to turn around.
The mare behind them was a with earth pony with a pink and red mane and heart cutie mark. The other mares did not recognize her, but Paradise knew her in an instant.
"Secret! It's so wonderful to see you again!" The Pegasus exclaimed, rushing up to take her old friend in a tight embrace. "Girls, this is Secret Tale, the Saddle Arabian pony who invited us to stay here! She and I first met at the international Storytellers guild convention in Hoofkaido last year!"
"The most honorable Paradise is correct, I am most happy to see you here in Ridejah, our nation's beautiful capital!" The mare bowed to the other politely, smiling at each of them. "I cannot wait to show you the many wonderful places in our city- as well as have you meet Prince Fire namd Princess Flame, our beloved and venerated rulers!" She looked over the mares with a critical eye. "but first, I believe we should get you rested up from your trip... and then get you properly bathed and dressed up for a journey around our honorable community..."
The Sands of Saddle Arabia
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Another crazy moment in Paradise
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The Sands of Saddle Arabia
Pony Philosophy, Vanilla Clouds in my Coffee
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