Saved by Espionage
Chapter One
Dimension Hop
In the middle of the night, while the crickets chirped and the very few owls hooted, something extraordinary occurred within the confines of the RED team's basement. Located in the American Southwest in the Badlands, Teufort was a wonder of a city, most notably named so due to it's very signature replica forts that have a long history with the Gravel War. One side is BLU, and the other side is RED. In these bases are bloodthirsty arms-for-hire and absolutely delusional nut-jobs that fight over a large area of useless land. But, unfortunately, the rarely calm area has a sewer system that has contaminated the water supply of the quaint city for over a year.
"God damnit! Doc, your gonna wanta see this!" said a middle-aged man in a bright yellow hard-helmet and overalls, his somewhat silly looking goggles hiding most of his expressions, but it can be assumed that he was shocked, his voice gave it away. Another man nonchalantly walks across the hard, waxed floor to the Texan. Who looked over at him with a stern look, but Medic wouldn't be able to notice because of his goggles.
"Vhat is it, Engineer? I'm busy calcul- Oh my god," a thick German accent whispered, a man dressed in a long white cloak and vest stared in absolute awe through a large glass window that portrayed rows of chairs and monitors below. But the most noticeable thing about the spacious basement area was a large opening right in the middle of the walkway that cut through all of the computers and chairs. It was completely engulfed in blue and seemed to be attached to the wall, it's texture seemed to flow like water being forcefully pushed by the wind to create small waves and ripples.
"I was just being all busy on my here Sentry-gun," he pats a large machine right beside him, it was resting on a metal tripod and had two separate mini-guns protruding from it's side like appendages. It let's out a beep at the feeling of the Engineer's rough touch, but does nothing more but keep mindlessly scanning the room. He shifted towards a long table with a device that simply had a red button right in the middle of it and a briefcase, papers sticking out of it as if they were sloppily shoved in. He picks up the small device, "I clicked this'ere button to destroy my dispenser so I can move it up for our crew tomorrow morning, and instead of my dispenser blowin' up, this happened!" He points towards the mass of blue through the window. Medic strokes his chin, the shock from initially seeing the anomaly worn down quite a bit.
The Doctor liked to work alongside Engineer, his very trite nature calmed him and made him forget about the stress of war, they did have the R.E.S.P.A.W.N system (Built by Engineer's father,) but it wasn't completely reliable and regeneration failures were frequent. Engineer has tried fixing it multiple times but, every time he dies, it could be his very last. He shook the thought from his head.
"Vell, you did hook up quite a large apparatus to your button-clicker-device yesterday, I asked you vhat you were doing. But you just took a sip of your alcohol, burped in vhy face, chuckled to yourself, and kept working."
"I don't remember that," The Engineer simply stated
"Probably because you were so intoxicated that you attempted to kiss Soldier when he asked for ze dispenser." Medic smirked, trying to stifle a laugh, he was not lying.
Engineer stared blankly for a moment, then shook his head, and spoke quickly, "Nope, d-definitely do not remember that." He looked back at the portal, changing the subject. "Do you have any idea what it is, Doc?"
"I overheard you talking to yourself about making some portal to an alternate universe, you kept mentioning very bright colors and horses," he paused. "Speaking of which, you mention equines quite a lot on ze battlefield, any reason why?"
"Oh, uh, it's nothing special.." He pushed the question off, "About yesterday, I mentioned that I was creating a portal to another universe, right?"
"Ah, yes, you were droning on about how if you raised the anti-mass spectrometer to 80 percent and power the overhead capacitors to one hundred and five percent you vould succeed."
"I'd never think I'd perform better while drunk." Medic laughed, smiling
"Learn zomething new every-day," he chuckled. Then looked at the portal, "How reliable to you suppose it'd be?"
"Pretty darn reliable, considering what you told me I was droning on about, that seems just about right," he mused. Looking away from the portal and at the Doctor "We should give it a test-run."
"Im not villing to risk my life with this apparatus; sorry."
"Well, that's fine, I have a plan." The Engineer smiled, and began to walk away from the glass window and out of the room, the Medic's gaze tracing him with a confused look.
The Next Morning
"Ya'll gather round now!" Engineer shrieked into the barracks of the RED base at precisely six AM in the morning, and his team wasn't a group of people who enjoyed getting up in the morning, so they all looked dead to the world, but a very specific man. A man formally dressed in a suit and mask stood behind most of his colleagues, making no attempts to push his way to the front to see why Engineer even dared to wake up all of the crazed killers around him at six AM. He wore a simple-yet-stylish Costra Nosta cap, and had a stern expression on his face. He looked more alert and ready for anything then his fellow comrades, but that is to be expected, Spy was a man of class and punctuality. He was the only one besides Engineer that was up so early, preparing his gear and probably taking a shower.
"What the hell is this all about, egghead! I was busy sleepin' over there!" The Scout motioned to a very uncomfortable wooden bench, a beat-box and two drinks of Bonk! Atomic Punch! Laid beside it, confirming his words. A snoring noise made everyone in the crowd immediately face Demoman, it wasn't even surprising anymore. He stood there, his head off to the side and drool slowly trickling down the side of his mouth. The Scout, still angered by the fact he was awake so early, walked over to him and violently shoved him down. "You bomb-chuckin' drunk! Wake your ass up like the rest of us!" He snarled. The Demoman quickly awoken, slamming into the ground, he let out a yelp and sat up, his surprised expression quickly changing into anger.
"Scot! You bloody idiot!" He screamed, and lunged at Scout, tackling him down and pulling out his battle, the Heavy quickly shoved everyone else away, pushing himself to the front of the small fight that was occuring, and grabbed Demoman by the head and lifted him off the skinny man.
"You! Stupid! Don't touch Scout!" He growled, Demoman struggled to get away, but his efforts were in vain. Engineer called out from the front of the crowd.
"You boys need to learn to play right! Listen to me! Now!" He screams, everyone turned to face him quickly, he had his wrench out. Ready to discipline anybody who decided to stand up to him, he took a deep breath. "Now, last night, I accidentally created a portal to a different universe, O-" He is interrupted by a very familar French accent that he hates with a burning passion
"Wait, wait.. You accidentally opened a portal to an entirely different universe?" Spy stared in disbelief, "How does that even happen?!" He slowly walks over and sits on the bench Scout was sleeping on, everyone staring at him, he rests his forehead in his hand. "I could have got a job as a Lawyer, but i'm here.." He muttered, then looked up. "Engineer, how did you manage this?" He asks, a tinge of apprehensiveness in his voice.
"Well, y'see, I saw slightly dru-"
"Engineer, you attempted to kiss Soldier."
A gruff male voice interrupts, "I would've done it! I just was missing my arms and needed that dispenser for the sake of my HONOR!" His voice resonates through both of them, clenching his fist and straightening his posture, then saluting both of them before fading back into the crowd.
"I work better while drunk," he argued
"How is that possible? Your IQ goes down while intoxicated, not up."
"I don't know, i'm no Doctor."
They both look at the Medic, who stands in the corner, he smiles sheepishly.
"Uh." He shrugs, letting a few nervous chuckles out. Spy looks back at Engineer, a stern expression.
"Show me." The Texan stares at him for a few moments, then begins to walk towards the sliding door, motioning Spy to follow behind. The Scout goes to follow as well, but Spy stops him, much to Scout's displeasure.
"Nobody else, yet." They both leave and begin to casually walk down a metal staircase leading into the depths of their base. The Engineer discussed what happened to Spy, who simply nodded, not knowing what Anti-Mass Spectrometers were, despite his more advanced knowledge then most of his fellow soldiers. He liked his comrades, even if they were crazy and very thick-headed. He found it honorable fighting beside them, even if they did seemingly impossible things. Engineer created a portal to another dimension, how often does that happen in any other war?
They did not go into the room where they kept their intelligence, They flung open a door parallel to the hallways that led to the briefcase, beginning to descend another flight of stairs. They found themselves in a very large room that is lined with Monitors and comfortable looking chairs, Spy noted that it smelt like something burning. After he store, in disbelief, at the horribly large blue Portal, the material that makes it up seemingly sloshing around like water in a cup.
"Y'see, I accidentally created it by clicking the button on my Machine-Disposer 3000"
"What a original name," Spy muttered, rolling his eyes. Walking up to the portal, "Hm." He stroked his chin, then, without thinking, took his hand and stuck it into the portal. He felt as if he just submerged it into a pot of Jell-O.
"What an interesting feeling, we must have somebody go through it." He pulled his hand out, it was covered in what looked like Gelatin. Engineer grimaced at the sight
"That's disgustin', Boy."
"I'm not always very Hoity-Toity, Engineer." Spy flashed a smile at him, he groaned and frowned. "He may as well test it out today, none of the BLU members are up yet, it's a perfect time!"
"Well.. I guess we can try, maybe something like a vote for who goes through?" Engineer mused.
"Sounds great!" Spy replied, he did not want to risk his life by diving into things he did not know, if they were to vote. The chances of him being picked were very slim, he wasn't much of a brute, and his colleagues will think he possibly couldn't handle the conditions.
Voting Session
"Now, who votes for.. Me, to enter the Portal to discover what lurks on the other side?" Spy said to the group of mercs, Spy was sweating profusely and was very anxious. He hoped they weren't paying attention, he went through with the voting, being the person dictating the surprisingly formal and professional session. Which is very rare among the bunch of nine, as he talked about this, nobody bothered to raise their hand for anybody but Medic and Engineer for Heavy, who just snorted in response. Spy did not want to do this, what did his teammates see in him? But it could be just like when they thought they were all going to die due to tumors. Where nobody bothered to listen.
But, he was not very fortunate, seven hands raised up, and Spy's eyes widened. He didn't want to do this!
"W-what?! Why me!" He spluttered, fear tearing it's way to the surface of Spy's emotions.
"What can I say, Your damn good at your job, Chuckle-nuts," Scout said, murmurs of agreement ran through the crowd. Heavy raised his hand slightly, Spy let out a groan.
"Heavy, you can speak."
"I usually don't admire Tiny Baby Men, but Scout is true, you are good at job." His poor English forced Scout to stifle a laugh. Spy paid no mind to this, he was more worried with the situation at hand.
"Bu-" Sniper interrupted.
"Back luck for you, Mate! Majority wins!" He seemed happy that Spy could possibly die, Sniper hated Spy, the feeling was mutual.
Spy let out a groan, "Fine! I'll do it." Sniper smiled.
"Alright, Spy, follow me, everyone else return to your normal business," Engineer said. Spy walked over to him, a look of fear distorting his face. Engineer looked at him, Sympathetic. "Don't sweat it, you'll be fine.. I think."
"Who knows?" Spy shrugged, trying to act like he didn't care, but it was obvious he was afraid. He was always the person who was unknown, people got scared of him, he didn't get scared.
Spy repeated this to himself in his mind, trying to push the fear out of his brain, and found himself standing in front of the large, swirling portal, Engineer stared at him expectantly as he took a deep breath.
"Get along, now," he urged. Spy tugged on his suit slightly, a bead of sweat forming under his mask. What will happen once he went through? He gulped and then backed up.
"I'm running in!" He didn't want to seem like a coward to Engineer, who smiled at the sight
"Being brave now, are we? That's good." He nodded his approval.
Spy took off running towards the opening, unable to hold in a scream of courage as he collided with it, he felt himself become weightless and float towards the sky. He couldn't see, he felt like he was falling, he still hasn't stopped screaming. But he couldn't hear anything. He started shooting upwards in a alarmingly fast rate, Spy attempted to scream, and thought to himself that he was going to die right here and now, he clenched his fist together and prepared for the worst. But, the horrible sensation of falling halted, and he heard the chirping of a distant bird. He didn't open his eyes right away, and just lay there, trying to not throw up. But surely, he opened his eyes to find himself staring at the sky, he sat up quickly, but realized it was a mistake and felt dizzy. He scanned his surroundings as the nauseating feeling wore off. He saw that he was in an alleyway, only one thing was off, everything seemed.. Flat, there was little texture on the walls and ground and the colors were very bright and seemed to pop. He raised an eyebrow, at least he wasn't in some sort of volcano or something. He slowly got to his feet and stretched, the sound of his bones cracking as he flexed them.
"Whew, that was rough," he grumbled. "I never want to experience anything like that, again."
And with that, he walked out of the alley way.