The Conversion Bureau - Together
The
CONVERSION
►Bureau
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Together
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An MLP:FiM Fanfiction by Midnight Shadow
The director shuffled the papers on his desk and sighed. He flipped the folder closed. They’d sent it specially from Head Office; it was made from real cardboard, contained glossy photographs, actual hand-typed reports... now he thought about it, he was pretty sure they were hoof-typed, ponies had certain distinguishing mistakes they always made. It was amazing they’d spent this much money on real dead-tree matter. This prospective conversion meant something to somebody, or somepony. He pinched the bridge of his nose, having things matter gave him a headache.
“Mister Julian Tanner, Mister Jack Tanner. It’s a pleasure to meet you.”
“The pleasure is all ours.” said the one that Marcus had been assured was Julian.
“It really is, we’re so glad you agreed to meet us.”
I didn’t really have much of a choice, did I, Sonny-Jim? he thought under he breath, I don’t know what strings you pulled, or whose wheaties I pissed in to get you sent to my desk. Aloud, he said, “It was the least I could do with a case so unique as yours.”
“Unique? Surely you’ve met someone with our issues before?”
Marcus shook his head slowly, “No, I can’t say as I have. Cases such as yours... they don’t tend to crop up. Can you help explain what...” he hesitated, waving a hand about ineffectually.
“Went wrong?”
“Happened, I was going to say happened.”
Julian smiled wryly, “No you weren’t. It’s okay, we get that a lot.”
Julian’s and Jack’s mother and father were blessed - twins! Twice the blessing from the Lord! They had been so happy - the doppler had only ever caught one heartbeat, but that was to be expected. The machine was decades old and should have been scrapped, but it was still mostly reliable and money saved was money earned. The ultrasound was similarly decrepit, but it showed the shadowy outline of too many limbs to be a single child. Things grew well... for a time.
It was during the sixth month that Julian’s mother grew sick; some said it was bad rations, others the poor state of the water, but she was sent to a proper hospital because she was pregnant. It was then that they discovered the truth.
Julian and Jack - at the time mere blobs with no names - weren’t quite growing the way they should have been. They were, in fact, conjoined twins. Siamese twins was the old name for them. It was so far along, the necessary reconstructive in-womb surgery would now be fatal to one of the twins, but she was urged to take it. She declined, God had given her this as a sign to prove her faith. It was the way of their church - no nano-surgery, no blood transfusions. No operations that cut the skin.
Two months later, she died.
The babies - the baby, to be strict - were cut from inside their mother, brought into the light and given to a distraught father. He couldn’t cope. It was unsurprising, really. He had believed his God would make his children healthy and strong. They had to be the work of the Devil, the Devil who had taken his beloved wife.
He went in search of her in Hell.
He took his own life.
The twins were abandoned, found, and taken to a shelter. They grew up in relative comfort, they got an education. Against all prognosis, they survived. As things are likely to do, however, they changed. The world around them opened up, even as their conjoined body began to shut down. There were surgeries that could perhaps save one of them, but the money necessary for a full reconstruction for even one of them, let alone two, could not be found. The time of charity and giving were over, it seemed.
“And then, the impossible happened,” said Julian.
“Equestria!” piped up Jack.
Marcus kept his face carefuly empty, he was sure the last thing these two wanted was an honest answer. Honest answers were so rarely appreciated.
“So I brought Jack here to our local Conversion Bureau. They said they could probably help us...”
“And a few stops later,” added Jack, “here we are!”
Marcus forced a smile onto his face, “I’m glad to be of service... but, you must understand, we’ve never... done anything like this before.”
Julian and Jack shared a look, as much of a look as was possible when your conjoined twin is one head, barely any unique organs and a small stump of an arm, growing out of your shoulder. They smiled, suddenly, and Marcus raised an eyebrow.
“We don’t want promises,” said Julian.
“We want the truth.”
“An honest answer?”
The pair nodded.
Marcus took a deep breath and sighed, he pinched the bridge of his nose again for a second, and then flipped open the folder, “I give it an eighty percent chance that one of you will survive, perhaps fifty-fifty for that survival meaning ‘without serious deformity’. I’ve seen some incredible things, but... I’m not sure what Potion will do to you.”
“As high as that?” answered Julian brightly.
“I give it only a ten percent chance that both of you will survive, if that. Probably much lower. I don’t know how much... body-mass you two share, but I have even less idea how that could be carved up between you to create two full-sized stallions, nor how the Potion would know, nanobots or not.”
“We share everything,” replied Julian.
Jack nodded, “One heart, two kidneys, two lungs... the same stomach. Joint control over a few of the autonomics...”
Marcus gently placed his hand back down on the mahogany table, opening it up flat and rubbing his palm nervously against the edge. It was a nervous tick; he recognized it for what it was but felt powerless to prevent such a display, “I’m going to need you to sign release forms, stating you are fully aware of the possible consequences. You’re probably going to die, probably both of you, at least one of you... I...” he closed his eyes, squeezed them tight.
Julian reached a hand forwards, and closed the folder, “We all die sometime, Mister Cooper. If we don’t try now, we’ll both die, and sooner rather than later.”
“The doctors give us a few years, tops, before something major fails. We don’t have the money for replacements, and by that time everything will start to fail.”
“We can’t afford the surgery, even if the techniques existed. We can’t afford the fee for replacement organs, even if they could be made and implanted. You’re our last, best hope, Mister Cooper.”
Wordlessly, Marcus opened a drawer in his table. It was a real drawer in a real table, both hand-made. The table was an antique, he had no idea who had made it or when, but collectors had offered a lot of money for it. He’d have taken the cash, but it wasn’t even his and he’d only have to get a new one. He was a relatively junior member of the Conversion Bureau when all was said and done, but as one of the only human staff who had stayed bipedal, he had risen through the ranks, such as they were. His station, Director of Operations, was a joke. What it really meant was that he was incompetent at anything even remotely useful in the Bureau. He was no doctor, his voice was too soft and unsure for announcing. He couldn’t cook or wait tables, so they holed him up in a nice plush room and gave him luxuries - toys, furniture, equipment, assistants. Anything, to make sure he remained where he was.
He took out two simple sheets of paper, forms that were rarely but relatively regularly used for ‘troublesome’ cases, and silently slid the drawer shut. This was his true task - make sure that the Bureau’s Arse was covered. He proferred a pen and spoke, “I need you two to both sign copies. This form absolves us of any and all legal responsibility for any negative reaction or outcome which may befall you should you, of your own un-coerced will, take Potion. We will do our best to assist you in a successful Ponification, but with a case as unique as yours... all bets are off.”
Julian signed. It was easy, he had the full-sized arms. Jack’s signature was a messy scrawl only managed when Julian held up his brother’s copy against the folder. The cap was replaced on the pen, the papers were collected, stacked, shuffled, stamped and filed. the wording on that form was so strict and meticulously picked over, that he could now legally shoot them in the head and dissect them for medical studies, if he wanted. He’d probably get a promotion if he did. Marcus felt sick.
“I am sorry if our countenance offends you.” said Jack, softly. Marcus stopped and turned to look back at the pair.
“I’m sorry,” Marcus said, and cleared his throat, “I’m not having a good day. It’s not you, it’s me.”
“We hear that a lot,” said Julian, a strange, sad smile on his face.
Marcus clenched his fist, “No, I mean it. I’m just... not having a good day.”
“Want to talk about it?” asked Julian, tilting his head.
Marcus braved a small smile and stood up, straightening his clothes. He walk to the door to his office, grasping the handle and pulling it open. His office was a picture of retro styles from yester-year. Manual light switches, real books, real plants. True, the plants were sickly and malnourished and he’d never read the books, but it was the thought that counted. “I see hundreds, thousands of people come through here. I’ve sat here for several years, day in and day out, and seen ponies emerge from whence humans were sent. In one door on two legs, out that same door on four hooves.”
“Well of course, this is a Conversion Bureau after all.”
“Sometimes I wonder what comes back.”
“You’re scared, aren’t you?” asked Jack.
Marcus nodded, breathing deeply. He noted, in the corner of his mind, that this was probably only the second time the ‘smaller brother’ had spoken up first. “Our world is sick, dying. Like you, it must be ponified sooner rather than later, and when we least expect it, it will be.”
“I’m not scared, Mister Cooper.”
“Call me Marcus, Mister Tanner.”
“Mister Tanner...” Julian laughed, “call me Julian, it’s only fair. As the saying goes, ‘Mister Tanner was my father’ but I never knew him.”
“My father was a good man.”
“I’m sorry for your loss.”
“He’s not dead... well at least my mother tells me he isn’t. I’m not sure if either of them are alive, to be honest.”
“You mean they’re ponies, don’t you?”
Marcus nodded as they stepped down the stairs into the bustling Bureau proper. It was mealtime and the volume was deafening. It barely stopped as the trio weaved their way through the throng, Julian limping with an odd gait as he compensated for his curved spine and awkward centre of gravity. Marcus led the way through the doors marked with the big red ‘Authorized Personnel Only’ sign to the Ponification Rooms. The Stamford Street Conversion Bureau was a large one, capable of mass conversions if necessary. He remembered a few weeks ago, with a shudder, when fifty people at once had lined up to take their alloted portions of potion and had ritualistically downed them at the same time. All of them, every man, woman and child, had fallen to the floor before the cups had left their lips. He’d turned away, sick. He wasn’t with the HLF - the so-called Human Liberation Front were nothing but thugs and criminals. Their so-called ideals were nothing short of inane and counter-productive - there was no liberation in their ranks, only servitude. He therefore sat with those attempting to end the human race through the gentlest of means. He was friendly with ponies, thought they were wonderfully charming creatures, but the idea of his body melting like wax and reforming as if some giant parasite were devouring him from the inside... he shuddered anew.
“I think they won’t be happy, not until you join them, but you won’t, will you? Not until you have to, maybe not even then?”
Marcus shrugged, “I like my life too much to give it up.” he gulped, a cold pit in his stomach. He’d said too much.
Julian considered, “You fear crossing the veil, taking that step. It’s not death you fear, it’s life. Life as something else, isn’t it?”
Marcus held open the door to the ponification room, a puzzled look on his face, “What do you mean?”
“It’s been studied, Marcus, a lot. The fear of being... held prisoner inside your own flesh as some other being inhabits your mind, like a zombie. You fear that the ponies are zombies, walking animated robots with the thoughts and hopes and dreams of their former human selves allowed to play on a blank canvas.”
Marcus nodded dumbly as Julian and Jack walked past.
“You know what I think?”
Marcus shook his head.
“Well, ask yourself this - how do you know that’s not what you are right now?”
The Ponification Room was sterile, spotless. Three humans and two ponies stood waiting. The room was a single, built for one human-to-pony conversion at a time, and it was cramped. Marcus squeezed in and stood in the corner, file held between thumb and forefinger.
“Good morning, sir,” said Penelope to Marcus, inclining her head, “good morning gentlemen. I’m Penelope Carter, I’ll be your nurse for today. Joining me are Sunbeam, Joyful, Adam and Tracy.”
“Pleased to meet you!” said Joyful, a light blue unicorn with dark blue mane and tail. Marcus idly wondered if it was a he or a she.
“Likewise,” said Sunbeam, a golden coloured unicorn with an oddly light-green mane and tail.
“This is going to be the most exciting Conversion in quite a while,” said Tracy, “we’re all hoping for the best. I’m a fully-trained vetinarian for any post-conversion needs. Up you get onto the table now, chuck your clothes over in the corner. Be prepared to lie down on your side, it’ll make things easier for when you wake.”
Julian and Jack complied - disrobing was awkward and painful, with lots of grunting and swearing, but eventually it was over. The twins sat on the bed sheepishly, naked.
“And I suppose you’re a doctor?” Julian asked Adam.
Adam grinned and shook his head, “Programmer. One of the last. I’m here to talk to the real stars of the show, the nanites.”
So saying, Adam took out a small pencil and tapped lightly on an oddly-shaped flask - Marcus knew it as an Erlenmyer Flask, the quintessential laboratory companion in any mad scientist’s laboratory, and also stock piece in Ponification rooms.
“You alright in there you little bastards?” Adam asked, looking expectantly at a computer monitor. A red square appeared on it. Adam frowned and tapped again, “stop fucking about, I know you can hear me.”
This was met with a yellow triangle, a blue circle and finally a green square.
“Good, say hello to Julian and Jack, you’re going to get to know each other very well soon.”
Marcus raised an eyebrow, this was new. He blinked and did a double-take as reams of data sped across the LED monitor at breakneck speed.
“Don’t mind them, they’re just showing off. I’ve upgraded the standard nanites with the newly-released, sub-sentience, restricted intelligence software. They’re not ‘alive’ according to the big boys who get paid more than I do to think these things through, but they’re a damned sight smarter than the generic nanites they bung around these places. I’ve explained to them as best as I can your situation, Jules and Jack, and explained to them the preferred resolution to your conversion. They’ve said they’ll try their best.”
“They said that?” Julian asked, grinning.
“Well no, what they said was something more like they’ll attempt to obtain maximum end-game simulation fulfillment.”
“Which is?”
“Two for two. They’ve tried to explain what they’ll be doing, but... they’re strange little bastards. It devolves into technomancy and my lexicon don’t stretch that far.”
“Technomancy?” Marcus spoke suddenly. It was a few moments before he realised it was his own voice that had silenced the room.
“Magic,” came the strong voice of Sunbeam, “we use your science for the initial conversion, but at some point our Equestrian magic takes over. Your nanites have been infused with the necessary spells and cantrips to complete Conversion. I and my partner Joyful Song are here to observe and, where necessary, assist.”
“We’ve studied at Celestia’s School for Gifted Unicorns, graduated top of the class!”
“Oh I do so hope to meet her one day!” said Jack.
“Newfoals often tell us they dream of Celestia and Luna,” said Joyful Son, nuzzling Julian, “I hope you do too.”
“If you can give us the potion now, I think we’ll go see.”
“It’s usually around three fluid ounces per person, less for children, more for the obese or sick and injured." said Penelope as she checked Julian's and Jack's blood pressure. She switched to a cursory physical exam and eased an old stethoscope over her ears and listened to their joined breathing for a while, a puzzled expression on her face. "After careful consideration, we’ve decided to start with four - too much can be as fatal as too little, so please drink it all in one go.” said Penelope, handing a plastic beaker with the strange, dark-purple liquid in it to Julian.
“I thought this stuff was lighter purple?”
“It’s the new coding, I think it’s the nanites having a joke. They tell me they’re expressing black cherry today rather than grape juice.”
Julian swirled the faintly-sparkling mixture around in his cup before downing it in one. “You really have improved the coding, this actually tastes go-”
The cup fell from suddenly lifeless fingers, Joyful caught it in her magic and laughed, “every time!”
Julian was alone. It was dark, but warm and comforting. He could feel his brother, just as he always had somehow, near to him. He walked - he didn’t seem to have any arms or legs, but walking was what he wanted to do, so he walked. Soon he fancied he could hear hoofsteps. Some time later, he realised those hoofsteps were his own.
He emerged into light, suddenly bright and harsh. He blinked overly-large eyes until he could see again. He was in a castle, a medieval castle, right down to the purple drapes and red carpet. He looked up into the ceiling, and saw the heavens. Above him whirled the infinite expanse of space and time, the moon circling the sun in the slow dance of the ages.
“Greetings, Julian.” said a voice. It was a feminine voice, full of mirth and laughter, but bereft of malice. He snapped his head down, breathing hard, his tail flagged high in shock. There was soft tinkling laughter and a new voice spoke.
“Tia, you should try not to startle them so.”
“And what would my little sister have me do, hmm? Squeak like a mouse?”
“Clear your throat,” the new voice gave a demure little cough, “and then introduce yourself. Good morning, Julian. I am Luna, princess of Equestria.”
“And I am Celestia, princess of Equestria. We welcome you to our humble abode.”
Julian took stock of the situation. His ears perked forwards and he flicked his tail nervously. It took him a few seconds to realize what he’d done, and couldn’t help looking at himself in wonder once he had.
Luna laughed again, “Are you sure this is a newfoal? He doesn’t speak much, sister. Perhaps he is but a terran pony, lost in our lands?”
“Y-your highness,” stammered Julian, ceasing his perpetual spinning, “I am honoured to be here... I am here, aren’t I?”
Celestia considered, “You’re actually on a table in the town they call London, on earth... but yet in a way you are here with me, right now, as is your brother.”
“Why have you... I mean I’m honoured to meet you, princess... Celestia? Do I call you princess? Or-or your highness?” Julian blushed, he looked down at his hooves in wonderment. For the first time, all the limbs he could see were entirely his own.
“You may call me Celestia, little one.”
“I thought newfoals were sent running through fields or fluttering around clouds?”
“Do you want to be?”
“N-no, I was just ask-”
“Then worry not. I and my sister have brought you here for a small chat. The body you feel yourself in now is highly representative of how you will appear when you wake up, but I stress that life for you will be even more different than for a normal newfoal. All my new subjects are so dear to me, I love each and every one of you, and I feel a growing pain in one of my newest. You.”
Julian bowed his head, “I’m going to lose my brother, aren’t I?” he whispered.
Celestia looked at him sternly for a moment, but then her gaze softened, “You would give up your life for your brother? It would be so simple to let him die.”
“Of course I would give up my life! How could I not? He’s a part of me!”
“Not any more, Julian Tanner. You must give him up. You must learn to be your own pony, to find your own hopes and dreams.”
“And forget about my brother?”
“Oh no, no, never forget... but you must stand on your own four hooves. Can you do that for me?”
“Is... will he feel pain?”
“No, Jack is not in any pain.”
“Good, I would... I would hate for him to hurt. Where will... what will happen to him?”
“We will talk with him for a while, Julian, before he leaves us. Tell me again, would you give up your life for your brother?”
“Yes, princess, I would.” Julian sighed, a tear running down his muzzle to fall to the floor, “So would he.”
“If you wish to be a pony in Equestria, Julian, you must give up something - something very dear to you. You must do it for your brother.”
“I will, just... promise he won’t hurt.”
“I give my solemn vow. Go now, through the tunnel. Run, play, dance, chase your tail - do all of these things and learn what it is to be a pony, it will bring you great happiness. You must fight, Julian, for your place in the world - not with anger but with love. Do it for me, for Luna, for your brother. Promise us, now!”
Julian nodded his great head and turned forlornly away.
“It’s working, vitals look good...” said Penelope. She studied the computer monitor. Code was flashing in the background, along with magical symbols she could neither interpret nor entirely recognize.
“The transformation continues apace. They dream, they are in the Summer Fields now, in the Court of the Sun and Moon.”
“Where?” asked Marcus, raising an eyebrow again. He stepped closer to the formless lump on the table. It was taking longer than usual to take shape, he knew, he’d seen it before by vid but never in person. He almost wanted to reach out a hand and touch the mass, but he knew it could be dangerous, to both himself and to Julian and Jack.
“They are finding their place in the herd, Mister Cooper, and by the thaumatic response, both of them are doing fine.”
“I'm not so sure, I think we’re losing Jack,” said Penelope, as the strangely amorphous blob migrated south as Julian’s body expanded along the neck and back. Julians fingers had shrunk around his rapidly-ballooning palms, until they were nothing but stumps. Then, the stumps fused together into a single larger nail which enveloped the pad of his forehoof. Peneloped watched it all relatively dispassionately as the process accelerated, taking Julian's feet with it. She’d seen it all before, but the way the part of Julian’s body labelled as Jack was engulfed in the flesh of Julian’s pony body was shockingly efficient and somehow... almost obscene. It sunk from sight and Julian’s belly closed over it.
Jack floated serenely near his older, bigger brother. He could hear voices calling, or they seemed like voices. They called him onwards, speaking of light and life, of motion and experience. He wondered then, for he felt his body form around him. He soared through the skies on magnificent wings. He’d never had wings before, they felt so big! They felt like they could touch each horizon and scoop up the whole world. Then he dropped down, to the mountains. He thundered through the valleys and secret paths, no longer did he have wings, now he was all form and thunder and lightning. The horn upon his head blazed with power, pure and savage, powerful. He cast lightning bolts from it’s tip, they spun through the air and blasted their way across the scenery and he exulted in the effortlessness of such manipulation of energy. Finally the mountains ended and he was on the plains. He threw back his head and neighed loudly, his call echoing from ground to sky, as he slammed his hooves upon the ground and trampled it beneath them. Slowly that too receeded, until he was left with just his hooves - small, weak, dainty even. He slowed to a stop. The great dusty plains melted around him until he was standing in a large stone-built room. The drapes were the deepest of purples and the carpet was plush and red. He giggled, stomping his little hooves into the fibres so they penetrated seemingly through the floor underneath. It tickled. It actually tickled. In a flash, he tipped himself up and wriggled on his back with his hooves now held above him in the air. It felt so good! A whole body, all to himself!
When he opened his eyes again, he saw two large shapes above him. The smaller dark blue one covered her muzzle with a hoof and giggled. The larger white one merely smiled, but he could tell she was laughing inside.
“I see our newest herd member has finally found his way to an audience with us. Little Thunderous Hooves likes his new-found earth-pony strength, hmm?”
“So much less stuffy than the last. I bet he’ll call you ‘Tia’ if you ask him.”
“Tia?” asked Jack, surprised at the high-pitched squeak in his voice.
“Told you.” smirked the dark blue one.
“You’re Luna! And Celestia!” exclaimed Jack. The two ponies inclined their heads as their names were spoke.
“We’ve brought you here for a little chat,” said Celestia, “before we send you out into the world to stand alone on your own four hooves.”
“Where’s Julian? I thought he’d be here with me?”
Celestia shook her head, “He can’t be here now, he’s gone.”
“I’m... I’m going to lose him?”
“You need to be prepared to stand on your own hooves, little one. You need to give up something very, very important to you.”
“My brother?” Jack’s voice quivered and cracked.
“He has carried you for your entire life, Jack. He has fed you, nourished you, watched you grow. It is time for you to live your own life.”
“I... always thought I would be the one to... to die.”
“We all die, even I will one day. Before then, we must live. Can you do that, for me? For Luna, for your brother?”
Jack nodded, “I will.”
“You are a brave little pony, faced with more hardship than most in many ways. You will have a whole new world to experience, one that you can touch and taste and see and hear and feel with your own body, not as a passenger but as a participant. Remember what you are giving up, little Jack, remember that it may hurt more than you realize, but that without that pain of separation you can never be an individual. Only then can you being to appreciate being part of the greater whole.”
The strange scene around Jack grew indistinct, murky and dark with odd flashes of light. Sounds were muffled and stretched, and he felt strange... it still felt like he was floating, waiting. He tried to cry out for his brother but no words came.
Penelope frowned. The regular beep-beep, beep-beep of the electrocardiogram spiked and jumped and then suddenly flatlined. The tuneful beeping was replaced with a shrill whine and almost gong-like sirens. Blood pressure dropped to nothing, muscles spasmed, the whirling code-lines of the nanites exploded into lights and sigils and strange formula.
“We’re going to lose them both!” she shouted, leaping into action. She ripped open the drawers and pulled out a large hypodermic needle and a larger bottle of adrenalin. Right into the heart, massage the muscle... crack the ribcage if necessary, palpitations were the key...
A hand touched her on the wrist, Marcus shook his head, “Stop, no, wait... just wait. You too, Tracy. Joyful, Sunbeam, keep back. You had to know this would happen.”
“They’re dying! For fuck’s sake!” screamed Penelope as the shrill cacophony continued.
“No, they’re not dying, they’re... growing.”
“They’re what!?”
There was a sudden beep-beep, followed by another beep-beep. The alarms stopped, almost apologetically. Penelope rushed to the table, her hand outstretched, before she snatched it back, “He’s alive?”
“He is... but...”
“But what? Jack’s dead?” asked Tracy, fretfully splaying her hand open above the pony on the table, who was now breathing easily.
Marcus laughed, shaking his head again, “For a vet, you really aren’t all that observant. What’s wrong with this picture? How do you think Jack could be turned into a pony and still survive?”
Penelope looked up into the laughing eyes of the usually-sombre and somewhat morose director, and then back at the pony on the table. Her mouth made a wide ‘O’ of shock.
“You see it? You see it, don’t you! You know, you’ve worked it out.”
“Shit!” swore Tracy, as she too saw the bigger picture. She turned to the two unicorns and to Adam, “Guys, I need you to get me water, nutra-shake, salt, a large hose and funnel, and preferably at least one of those bottles they use to feed ponies that can’t chew their food - they look like great big baby bottles.”
“What the hell do you need all that for?”
“Well I hopefully don’t need the hose and the funnel, explaining why you’ve got a hose and a funnel connected to some rather intimate organs of a pregnant mare is not an easy task. Those nanites are working full-steam ahead but they can’t create flesh from nothing, not in our universe. They can manipulate and recombine, but not create.”
“Did you say pregnant mare?” Adam looked at the screen, hit some keys and whistled through his teeth. “You clever bastards.”
“Stop congratulating them and get Trace her damned equipment or so help me I’ll stuff you into that pony to feed the little monsters.” Penelope was shouting too, now, running across the room with beakers of tap water which she was pouring down the throat of the pony on the table.
The unicorns had bolted and returned with boxes of strange, fluffy pinkish powder floating in the air behind them.
“Good! Mix it! Go, go, go!”
Adam returned, a minute or so later, breathless, with most of the equipment, “you mean to tell me... that my nanites...” he huffed and puffed as he threw the objects into the room where they were caught by one of the unicorns, Tracy, Penelope or Marcus, “that my nanites have turned conjoined twin brothers... into mother and child?”
Marcus nodded, “They’re smart, they knew they could never slice up the body and have them both live as-is, not even with ponification. Like Penelope said, they can’t create matter from nothing.”
Marcus shook the large bottle vigorously until the mixture within was even - a strangely off-white pasty drink. He eased the massive nipple into the unconscious equine and waited until she started to drink. Then he repeated the motion with the next, and the next.
“So, they decided to pull a fast one on us. They used Julian to keep Jack alive, in the only way they knew how, before finally disconnecting him from the loop and reconnecting him to one of the most amazing life-support systems we know of. Once that was done,” Marcus patted the chest of Juliet, as he now mentally called the mare. It was bulging with the extra water that a foal needed to live in, and the extra weight that the foal in question was putting on. “Once that was done, Jack could be Converted in relative safety. The only problem is Mama here should be about eleven months pregnant, according to the nanites. That means that Jack has to grow through whatever means necessary and Juliet here has to support him.”
“You mean they’re shuttling the water and protein shake directly into Jack?”
“I think so.”
“Stand back, gentlemen, I’m going to give her the last two ounces of Potion," said Penelope, "I’m not sure if the little blighters need the extra push or not but at this point it can hardly hurt. Thoughts, Adam?”
Adam nodded, “They’ll be running out of steam soon, this is already beyond original estimated operating capacity.”
“Reinforcements for the nano-swarm, then.” said Penelope, as she upended the flask into the pony’s mouth.
Julian opened his eyes. The room swam into focus. He blinked. Strong arms were around his neck, holding a large bottle in his mouth. He coughed and kicked and pulled back.
“Woah, woah, calm down Julian, calm down.”
“Where’s my brother?” Julian’s speech was slurred, almost incomprehensible. The fact nobody could understand it made no difference. They knew what he’d be asking.
“About that. We’ve got a few things to tell you...”
“Where’s my brother?” Julian’s voice grew more confident, angry even. “I want to see him!”
“He’s safe, safe, and very nearby. Calm down, please.” the note of pleading in Marcus’ voice was new. Caring.
“What happened? I was... I was with Celestia.” managed Julian, feeling around his new muzzle with his tongue as he spoke.
“The dream.” said Joyful Song, bowing her head, “All newfoals have it.”
“No, I was there, she spoke to me!”
“What did she say?”
“That I’d have to give something near and dear to me up.”
“You thought it meant Jack?” laughed Marcus.
“It didn’t?” light entered Julian’s eyes.
Marcus smiled, “I don’t know how much you were attached to the idea of being a stallion... but you won’t be one. It’s complicated.”
Julian struggled and kicked until he slid off the table to land in an unceremonial heap on the floor. He waved off the ponies and humans that went to help him, curious that they seemed more intent on his belly than the fact he’d hit his head. “What do you mean, I’m not a stallion? Four legs, a tail... I’m a pony!”
“You’re a mare.” said Marcus, flatly.
Julian leaped to his feet and then stood there, simply staring. Finally he asked, “What?”
“The nanites... they worked out a way to save both of you, but it’s a little unorthodox. I wouldn’t have thought of it, I doubt any human would have. It was too obvious.”
“I’m a mare? How does that help!?” he yelled, wincing. He hurt, his belly was strange and heavy and it felt like he had massive cramps. Weren’t ponies supposed to wake up feeling wonderful? He felt bulky and uncomfortable and more than a little sick.
“You’re gravid. With foal.” again the same flat voice, attempting to simply let him know the facts.
“I... am pregnant... with my own brother?” Julian’s voice cracked and his eyes went wide. He staggered slightly and then felt the soft caress of unicorn magic steadying him.
“I told you it was complicated. It gets more complicated, I think you’re about to go into labour.”
Julian groaned in pain as she walked around the small clearing. Two of the humans had suggested she stay still, but the unicorns and Tracy had flat out laughed. Julian moaned and grit her teeth. Everything hurt, her world was pain centered around her belly and an area just under her tail. She pushed and squeezed and suddenly it felt like something ruptured. She gasped, crying out, as a sudden wetness permeated her awareness.
“Water’s broke, not long now. It’s not like with humans honey,” said Tracy brightly, “with ponies it’s relatively quick and relatively painless.”
“Then you be the goddamn mare! Relatively my arse!” Julian cried out. She rolled over onto her side and lay there, gasping for a while, before getting up and taking a few more steps. She dropped to the floor and panted.
“Julian, honey, I’m going to take a look back there, okay?”
Julian didn’t answer with words, she just snorted. Tracy took her jumper off and rolled the sleeves of her long t-shirt up. She knelt down and lifted Julian’s tail out of the way to inspect the hanging bulb of the amniotic sack. It was breached, the waters having broken.
“I can see the forelegs. Julian, honey, I’m going to help a little, okay? I’m going to be pulling on his legs to just speed things up a tad, so don’t fret and don’t bolt.”
“I am not some addle-brained...”
“I didn’t say you were, Julian dear, but I have to say it. Now, when you feel the urge, push!”
Tracy took a firm grip on the slimy front hooves of the little pony and, when she saw Julian pushing, pulled. There was no apparent motion for a few moments and then suddenly with a burst of motion and a new torrent of amniotic fluid, the head came out. After that it was quick, very quick, and in under a minute the tiny form that had to be the new, improved Jack was lying on the floor. She had to fight Julian for a few moments as she extricated the foal from the sack but he finally came free and Julian turned around to look down at the form.
“That’s Jack, my bro-” she stopped, “my so-” she tried again. Finally, she bent and nuzzled the foal, “That’s Jack.”
Julian’s long tongue flipped out was lapping at the foal’s face for a few long seconds before Julian stopped and looked in horror at her appendage, “whath the thuck ath I thoing!?”
“Julian, keep doing it. Jack’s not breathing, you need to wake him up. Throw up later, I’ll find you the very best mouthwash and forget-me-juice I can, but if you want your brother alive, keep licking.”
Julian, looking rather green, kept licking. Tracy took her jumper and rubbed vigorously at the foal with it. Suddenly, he coughed and spasmed, jerking into life.
“Welcome back, Jack.” said Tracy.
Julian watched, amazed, as the tiny creature staggered up onto first two, then four legs. After several false starts, Jack was mobile. He seemed bemused, lost, and hadn’t yet shown intelligence.
“Is he okay?” asked Julian, worried. He stopped tracking the foal and looked squarely at Tracy.
“I think he’s going to be fine, especially now..." she paused, "Julian, you know how the first few things in a foal’s life are the most important? Well... he’s about to do something very important. It would be life-critical for a terran pony. Look at me, no, look at me, not at him. It could be life critical, do you hear me?”
“What’s he going to... do-oooooohhh!” Julian’s eyes went wide again as she felt the foal latch on to something between her hind legs.
“If you don’t let him nurse in the future, you’ll let him do it now at least.” smirked Tracy, “Anti-bodies and all sorts are in that first drink, it’s called ‘colostrum’. For a terran pony that doesn’t get that, it’s usually a death-sentence.”
Julian winced, “Now I know what I had to give up. My self-respect and dignity.”
“Happens to the best of us women, eventually. Who knows, it might even happen to me when I finally take the plunge.”
There was a soft knock at the door.
“Come in.,” called Julian, from the bed.
“I just... I wanted to see how you are. Both of you.”
“Hey Marcus, I’m glad you visited. We both wanted to say thank you... but I think Jack’s a little bit too tired right now. He’s not used to having a body all of his own.” Julian indicated a small form curled between her legs, where she herself was sat reclined on a large foam pad mattress.
“I... wanted to say thank you to you, too. Is he...?”
“He’s Jack, alright. He came to a while ago, like a lightswitch turned on. It’s all a bit strange for him, he’s never had to do anything for himself. I think I'm glad they made him a foal, if they hadn't..." Julian snorted, "what did you want to thank us for?”
“After seeing you, put through all of that... I’m quitting my job. I’m taking the potion. I’ll be here for a week, not as director but as a client.”
“We’ll be here for a while, maybe we’ll ship out to Equestria together?”
“I think I’d like that. Did Tracy ever get you that drink?”
Julian laughed, and pulled a bottle out from under the pad with her mouth, “Sure did. Want some?”