What if Trees Could Hug You Back?

by The Red Guitar

Rating: teen
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Other, Romance, Fluttershy
Length: 1534

Fluttershy has made a friend at the Grand Galloping Gala, Tree Hugger. Pot is involved, sex is involved... a lot of weird things are involved at this point.

Fluttershy made a friend at the Grand Galloping Gala, Tree Hugger. A laidback pony with just a little bit of illegal drugs.

Okay, ten grams. Twenty. Fine, 834.7 grams.

But that won't make things weird. Scratch that. It will.

Published 2015-05-19 05:30:01 UTC
Last updated 2015-05-19 05:30:01 UTC

Chapter 0, man

Oh boy, this is exciting!

Fluttershy skipped out of her front door and treaded along a dirt road. She hummed a gentle and soft tune as she strutted towards her friend's house, soaking in the beautiful day. This was the first time that Fluttershy was going to visit Tree Hugger's home, an event that she waited for a long time. She had never actually seen her house, leaving her pondering about what it would look like.

Maybe there are animals in her home, Fluttershy thought to herself. She is really fond of rare creatures that nopony has ever seen before.

Fluttershy did not have to worry about how to get there. As it turned out, Tree Hugger did not live too far from Fluttershy's house, making it a small ten minute walk. Fluttershy breathed in the cool fresh air and exhaled softly. The sounds of birds sang harmoniously, squirrels darted across the trail in front of her and the lines of bright and golden sunshine broke between the holes of the trees above her and coated her with a warm and comforting sensation.

As she walked on, Fluttershy began noticing some changes along the route of Tree Hugger's house. Vines appeared in progressive numbers, the calming sounds of birds were replaced with a chilling and hollow silence and the golden sun switched places with a dull grey sky. Not only that, but the scent of the air turned to a sour and smelly one. Pairing the scent was one that Fluttershy did not recognize, but it seemed familiar. It also became the majority of the scent, and almost overwhelmed her.

Fluttershy looked around her surroundings. Several instances of smoke surrounded her like a damp fog after a shower of rain. She sniffed it, and realized that it was not from some fire. The familiarity became more intense, Fluttershy just could not put her hoove on it. She could not worry about that now.

She arrived at Tree Hugger's.

Fluttershy dared not to think that it was a disaster, because that would possibly hurt Tree Hugger's feelings, but she thought it anyway. The house was no bigger than an average shack, and it was more poor than the quality of a shack. The house was built with faded white boards nailed together, and a roof that looked like it would collapse at any moment. A small chimney exhaled puffs of dim smoke, and no windows revealed the inside of the house.

Fluttershy gulped. She could not be sure if this was Tree Hugger's home, it could have been a mistake. Maybe she took the wrong way, and this was just some abandoned hermit's shack. The more she thought about it, though, the more that she realized that this had to be her house. Tree Hugger mentioned that she preferred to let things grow and do "its own thing", which sort of described her house, if she switched the words "grow" with "rot". She also stated specifically that she had never fixed her roof in her entire life.

Fluttershy turned her head over her shoulder and noted that she could come back any time, just not now. Or ever. But she had to. Fluttershy was Tree Hugger's friend, and she would never blow off a friend she just met. She turned back to the house and took feeble steps toward the red waning door. Fluttershy knocked on the door.

Crash!

Fluttershy guarded her mouth and took a step back after the door fell into the house. Instantly, she thought about how long she would have to apologize to Tree Hugger for damaging her home. She looked up from the door and discarded those thoughts.

Somehow, it was worse inside than out. The only room's dark cream wallpaper was peeling off, several bags of chips lay in piles on the floor and Tree Hugger's couch seemed to be infested with several insects. Smoke hung on the ceiling and came from one source; a bong in front of a red eyed Tree Hugger, staring up with a care free smile.

"T-tree Hugger?" Fluttershy stuttered.

Tree Hugger did not respond, looking up at the ceiling. Fluttershy wondered if she heard her, or the door or the crashing of the door. Fluttershy raised her voice.

"Tree Hug-"

"Fluttershy!" Tree Hugger said after eight seconds. "I didn't know you were coming today."

"Um, we made plans yesterday," Fluttershy said. "Don't you remember?"

"All I remember is the sky and the constellations, man. They flow in everlasting harmony."

That made little to no sense to Fluttershy. She sniffed at the air and stared at the bong with horror. "Tree Hugger! Are you....are you-"

"Woah, 'Shy. Why you all so excited about? Just chill..."

"Tree Hugger, is that...pot...?"

Tree Hugger stared at Fluttershy with a raised brow. "I don't have any pots, Fluttershy. But I do have pot."

Fluttershy twitched. She could not believe her. She seemed like just a gentle soul with many...interesting concepts. But as it turned out, she was a stoner.

"Tree Hugger, that's pot!" she said with worry. "You could get caught and sent to jail!"

Tree Hugger shook her head. "Nah, man. I won't get caught, I always keep the door closed."

Fluttershy stared down at the door, currently resting on the broken floor. Tree Hugger met her gaze and frowned.

"Bummer," she said. Then she chuckled.

"Tree Hugger, I know you have...fascinating habits," Fluttershy started. "But you can't smoke this. It's dangerous!"

"Come on, Fluttershy. There's nothing wrong with pot." Tree Hugger raised the bong and stretched her arm out towards Fluttershy. "Just give it a try, man. It'll be a cool and transcending experience."

"I know what pot is like!" Fluttershy squealed. She gasped and clamped her mouth shut. Tree Hugger stared at her with devilish eyes.

"So you know what it's like."

Fluttershy sighed. "When I was in school. Everypony was doing it, and I just wanted to fit in. I wanted to hate it, but...it gave me joy."

Tree Hugger nodded in understanding. She motioned Fluttershy to her. Fluttershy sat beside Tree Hugger and was handed the bong and lighter.

"Tell me about it," Tree Hugger said.

"HACK! So it's, like, I don't hate Discord, you know," Fluttershy said. "But I just, uh, don't really not into him. He's a good friend, but he gets weird, sometimes. "

"I can totally relate to that," Tree Hugger replied. "I used to have this salamander, but it was rare, and I was being super nice to it, but he wasn't giving me the respect I wanted, and I didn't know why, and I tried to like give him gifts so he would like me, and he still would not like me, and it was just a huge bummer."

"Wow," Fluttershy said. Time had slowed down. Her vision was different. Not entirely different, but different. Things looked out of place. She wondered if trees could talk. They probably could if they want to. There's nothing stopping them from having free will and having rights. Then she wondered if trees would get equal rights, because their not ponies. But zebras are not ponies, and they get rights. So trees probs could get rights if they wanted to.

"Hey," Fluttershy said. "I was totally thinking about trees getting equal rights and stuff, like ponies? You know?"

"Woah." Tree Hugger opened her eyes. "That's like, eye opening."

They both "woahed" in unison. Then they fell into silence for two hours, which was really two minutes. Fluttershy took another hit, and coughed with a thickness in her mouth. Tree Hugger stared at her intently, her eyes half-lidded.

"Have you ever, like, kissed a girl?"

Fluttershy gazed at Tree Hugger, then at the ceiling to think. "Uhhhhhh...I think once."

"Woah! What was it like?"

Fluttershy searched for sentences to meld together. "Because, like, bikinis were, like, strongholds for griffins and stuff."

She searched. She did not find.

Tree Hugger laughed. "That did not make any sense, but it made sense to me!"

"Yeah. I like griffins. They're cool."

"I never kissed a girl before."

"Really? Why?"

"Cause I'm straight."

"Oh."

"But I'm also gay."

"Really?"

"Yeah."

Fluttershy had to do it. It was her duty to teach this mare the mouth wrestling of a girl. Or something. Fluttershy crawled over to Tree Hugger and suddenly locked lips with hers. Tree Hugger widened her eyes then dropped them again. They both fell over to the ground and attacked tongues with each other. There was no spit; their mouths were completely dry.

Fluttershy woke with a start. She looked beside her and noticed Tree Hugger, snoring loudly with drool running down her mouth. She got up and gazed at the empty doorway. The sun was rising, or lowering. She turned to Tree Hugger and shook her body.

"Tree! Are you there?"

Tree Hugger started up slowly. "Oh hey, Fluttershy. Long time no see."

"What time is it?"

"I dunno."

"I think I should go."

"Probably."

"Bye."

"Bye."

And then Fluttershy left, leaving Tree Hugger to herself. Fluttershy yawned as she exited the house.

Next time, I'll crack out my old bong and let Tree Hugger check it out.