Rebirth

The next few days pass by in silence. By 'silence,' I mean no wolves made of trees tried to kill me or talk to me. I prefer that sort of silence. After I 'saved' the Cutie Mark Crusaders, many ponies tried to visit the local 'hero.' I kept my doors open to only eight ponies. Four used them. Those four? Pinkie Pie, Rarity, Fluttershy, and Applejack.

I return home from Sweet Apple Acres after the barn collapsed. Again. I helped rebuild it this time instead of going with the Crusaders for their crusading. I don't want to risk angering a deity again. I'm surprised the meeting with whoever that was didn't give me any nightmares. Princess Luna and Epona might be partially responsible for that. If that's the case, I need to thank them later.

As if to interrupt my thoughts, Twilight appears next to me. I don't know if she landed there after flying or if she teleported there. "Good morning, Mark." She says to me. "I feel like I haven't seen you in over a month."

"It's only been a few days." I say to her. "You had the opportunity to visit me."

"I'm sorry. If I could have taken any of them, I would have." Twilight says. "I was busy."

"Twilight, not too long ago, somepony told me not to be sorry about things you can't control." I tell her, recalling what Fluttershy told me shortly after I met her. I slide my hands into my pockets. They're empty. I thought I had my Swiss army knife in here. I usually keep it with me. It's not back home. Shit. Where did I put it?

The memory of what happened in Everfree comes back to my mind. More specifically, the part where I dropped my knife. I didn't pick it back up. Fuck. It's been days since that happened. Everfree is massive and pitch black. I'll never be able to find it again. Fuck.

"Are you alright?" Twilight asks.

I nearly forgot she was here. "Yeah. I'm alright." I half lie. I quickly tell her about my knife.

"If I ever see wander across it, I'll give it to you." She says with a smile on her face.

"Thanks, Twi. You're a great friend."

"It's what I do." She says with a soft giggle.

"Hey, Twi, do you want to stop by my place?" I ask in the spur of the moment. I feel like I've barely talked to half of my friends in a long time.

"I don't see why I can't. I'd love to." She says. The two of us take the short walk to my place and stop outside the door. The whole building, inside and out, still isn't anything special. If I was an asshole, I'd ask somepony for a bigger house. But I'm not, so I don't. "Do you have any tea at your home? I've been visiting Rarity for the past few days. She's kind of gotten me addicted to it." She adds a short laugh at the end of her statement.

"Tea? I don't think so." I say. "I've got coffee. Do you like coffee?"

"I haven't tried it yet, honestly." She admits with a hushed sigh.

"I think you'd like it. It's good in stressful situations, mornings, and stressful mornings."

"Then I'll have some." She says almost hastily. "I haven't had a slow morning in months." She admits. I feel bad for her. I want to hug her now. "What kind do you like?"

I rub my chin. "I like it black." Just like my metal. "I wouldn’t recommend black for newcomers.”

She puts on a grin. “Let me try it.”

“Really? It’s kind of bitter.”

"I'm always willing to experiment."

I shrug. "If you say so." I open the door to my house. Twilight studies my house. To describe it in one word? Messy. I've got clothes strewn about the place. There's a few stains on the floor. A cliche mother would call this a pig sty. I call it home.

"Are you.. Used to this?" Twilight asks after sufficiently looking at it. I can see a look of mild disgust on her face.

"Yep. It's actually cleaner than my room back on Earth." I admit to her. "Truth be told, most of the mess back then was because of my roommate."

She nods slightly. "Uh huh..." She's still looking around. It's like she's looking for something of hers. "How do you find anything? It's chaos in here."

I shrug. "Yeah, it's chaos. It's... Systematic chaos." I say. The reference to the Dream Theater album isn't intentional. "I'm better at finding stuff like this than I am with my shit actually organized."

"You almost sound like Rarity." I blink. When would Rarity ever have a messy house? Or even a messy room? "Didn't you say you were going to make me some coffee? I'd like to try it out."

"Thanks for reminding me." I say to her. I start up a small pot of coffee. Twilight and I continue to talk for the few minutes it takes for the coffee to heat up. I hand her a cup, which she takes in her magic. Her aura feels like... Honestly, I can't compare it to anything else. It's just so unusual. I don't even know if it feels more like a liquid, solid, or gas.

Twilight takes a single sip of the coffee. Less than a second later, her face scrunches up and she spits it out. “Dear Celestia, that’s really bitter!”

“I told you it's bitter.” I take sip of my coffee.

“I don’t think I’m going to have anymore coffee.” She sets the cup down.

I take her cup. “More for me, then.”

She looks at me drink in what could best be described as horror. “How do you…?”

“It’s an acquired taste.” I say with a drink.

“Yeah… I thought you were more of an alcohol person?”

I shrug. “Sometimes. Alcohol’s better for recreation. Or celebrating.” I take another sip of the coffee. “Or forgetting.” I reluctantly add. I’ve drank to forget before. It never really seemed to work for me.

Twilight doesn't say anything in response. She just looks down at the table. "You okay, Twi?" I ask.

"I'm fine." She says. She's definitely hiding something. I'm not going to force it out of her. I would if I was an asshole. But I'm not, so I don't.

"Alright. If you say so." I finish the drink and set the cup down.

She looks at the clock on my wall. "Celestia, it's after 8 already? I need to get back to the castle. It's after Spike's bed time."

"Think you can come over tomorrow?" I ask.

"I will if I can." She stands up. "I'll see you soon, Mark."

"See you. Tell Spike I said hi."

"I will. Goodnight."

"Night." I tell her. She leaves my home. I stand up and head for bed. I haven't been up for even 12 hours yet, but I'm exhausted. I have been the last few days. I’ve been like this since that time in the Everfree. I walk to my bed and fall on it. I fall asleep almost instantly.

"Mark Cleveland." An ever familiar voice says. I feel like I haven't seen Epona in a long time. "Word amongst my fellow deities indicates you have met another."

"Yeah, I think. I was in the Everfree Forest." I start. I tell her what happened about the timberwolf.

Epona nods in understanding. "Yes. That was Everfree. You can guess on your own what she governs."

"So, she's the deity of the forest? That explains why it's so different from Ponyville."

"Actually, Everfree is the forest." Epona clarifies. Is she fucking with me? "The entire forest is the physical manifestation of a deity." She adds, confirming that she is not, in fact, fucking with me.

That also means I met another deity. With that, something comes to my mind. "Are you telling me I was literally inside a god?"

"Not exactly. If you were inside the trees, then yes." She replies.

If I had a body, this is where I would rub my chin. "So do all deities have physical... whatever you called them's?"

"Manifestations." Epona replies. I have no idea what that means. "We can all change our appearances whenever we wish. We have no 'true form.'" She almost gags. "I hate having to use that phrase..." She says under her breath. I have to remind myself to smile about that later. "All deities within my pantheon do usually have preferred appearances, however. This is mine. As for if we are all physical? That depends. The pantheon is large, so I cannot remember if every deity is physical. I can currently recall nine that are."

"Are you...?" I ask.

She shakes her head with a deep sigh. "No. I am not. I am..." She struggles for a word.

"Intangible? Abstract?" I offer.

"Abstract could be accurate." She replies. Epona looks off to the side then back to me. "I apologize, but I must go now." She says with a bow of the head.

"Goodbye, Epona."

She fades at the sides. Part of me feels like this is the last I'll see her. The rest of me feels like the first part is an absolute idiot. "Goodbye is only accurate if we will never see each other again. This won't be our last meeting."

Before I get a chance to respond, my vision fades to black.

I wake up with an actual amount of energy. I feel like I can actual stay awake for more than 12 hours. Good. The date with Rainbow Dash is today. I stand up out of bed. I think this is the first time in my life I haven't spent time in bed trying to wake up.

There's a knock at the door. I haven't even been awake for a solid 60 seconds yet. If that wasn't perfect timing, I don't know what is. I open the door to reveal Rainbow Dash and an exhausted looking Twilight Sparkle to the inside of my house.

Rainbow looks inside my house. "I still haven't met any stallions with clean houses..." She mutters. "Are you ready?"

"Yep." I reply simply. "Why did you bring Twilight?"

"Somepony's gotta teleport us there. The place I have in mind's kinda far away. Normally I'd just fly there, but..." She gestures to my lack of wings.

"Yeah, I get you." I reply. "Oh, before we go..." I say and head inside my house. I return with three bottles of wine and a small tent. I don't even remember getting a tent.

Rainbow looks at the bottles with an expression that makes her look like a teenage girl that just met her idol. I'm suddenly reminded that I have no idea how old Rainbow Dash, or anypony else for that matter, is. I imagine Rainbow's around my age. Rainbow turns to Twilight. "Are you ready to teleport us?"

Twilight's response is a simple grunt. Wow. She's terrible with mornings. Her horn lights up. Rainbow and I are surrounded by her aura. My vision fades briefly to black. The color returns shortly after. We're in a different area. A beach by an ocean. It almost reminds me of the Pugent Sound. There's significantly fewer skyscrapers and pollution here.

Rainbow looks at me. "So... I heard how you saved the Crusaders.” Rainbow says. That's one way to start a romantic day. “That was amazing, what you did. I wish I was there so I could’ve seen it.”

Shit. I want to tell Rainbow that I didn’t actually kill a timberwolf. She’d probably tell other ponies about it. That might ruin my reputation. I don’t want to be seen as a liar. Not saying something isn’t exactly lying.

I put on a fake smile. “I managed to do it without cutting myself open, too.”

I spot a patch of beautiful looking flowers. I stop walking next to them. Rainbow does too. I lean down, pick the flowers, and turn them into a sort of a bouquet. I hand it to her. “Thanks, Mark.” She says with a beautiful smile. Then she eats the flowers.

I blink. “Uh…”

She swallows the flowers. “What?”

“...You ate the flowers?”

“Yeah. I did." She replies. "Ponies do that.” She adds.

“Oh. Oh! Yeah, yeah, I knew that.” No I didn’t. “I was just…”

“You didn’t know that.”

I rub my neck. “No…”

“Welcome to Equestria.”

“I knew you ate hay.”

“But not flowers.” She scolds me. She can’t wipe the smile off her face.

"Suck a dick, Rainbow." I say with a chuckle.

"If you're not careful, I will." She replies. Well. I didn't see that coming. I struggle to come up with something in response. Rainbow blushes deeply. "Yeah... We're too soon into this for that..."

I feel like I dodged a bullet. I don't want to get into a sexual relationship too soon. I don't even know if I ever want to get into one with a pony. To literally fuck a horse? That's just not something I think I can do. Even if we were hypothetically deeply in love.

"So..." Rainbow says, killing the awkward silence that I didn't even notice. "The ocean's beautiful." She says.

"Yeah." I reply. What I said earlier led to a painfully awkward path. That's not something I should have said. "It's really blue. The bluest water I've seen."

"Water's really blue in Equestria. What color's Earth water?"

"Naturally, it's blue, but not nearly this blue." I reply. "Most water I've been exposed to was polluted. I'm not gonna get into that too much. Not during a date. Talking about how shitty Earth was isn't very romantic."

We spend the next two hours in our tent talking about a lot of things. Her relationship with Scootaloo and the other Crusaders is a pretty major topic. She told me she sees Scootaloo as a little sister. I could actually see that.

"So, Mark. Did you have many friends back on Earth?"

I shrug. "Sure. I had a few. Not nearly as many as here." I say. I realize now just how depressing that is. I haven't even spent a month in Equestria and I already have more friends than a planet I've lived on for 23 years. I guess it makes sense. This is a place that Ringo Starr would absolutely adore. It's filled beyond the brim with love and kindness. I prefer it here. "You know, Rainbow. I don't think I've told you how beautiful I think you are."

She puts on an almost nervous smile. "Yeah? I don't think I'm beautiful. Sure, I look awesome, but beautiful's not the word for me."

"I'm not an expert on beauty, but you're definitely up there."

She raises an eyebrow. I think she almost looks like Dwayne Johnson when she does that. It doesn't matter what I think. “Okay, Mark. I get it. You think I look beautiful. You can’t think I’m the most beautiful pony.” Rainbow says.

I’ve heard this on dates before. No matter my response, it’s never ended well for me. So I tell the truth. “No, you’re not.” Rainbow gasps slightly. “If I wanted to go for beauty, I’d be dating Rarity. But I’m not dating Rarity. I’m dating you. I focus more on the personality than looks. I like Rarity, but our personalities are too different to get romantic in my opinion. I’ve never really cared for fashion. I like you for you, Rainbow. Appearance doesn’t matter to me. It’s like wrapping a present. Do you keep it for the wrapping or for the present? I keep the present for the present. I’ll tell you, Rainbow, you’re one hell of a present with a beautiful wrapping.”

“That… Thanks, Mark. Thank you.” Rainbow says. She wraps me into a hug. “You know just what to say. Have you said that before?”

“No. That was all off the top of my head. All of it’s true, though. I like you for your personality. Sure, you’re good looking, but that’s not why I’m here on this date with you.”

Rainbow giggles slightly. It kind of surprises me. I’ve never heard her giggle before and I never thought I would. She gives me a quick kiss on the cheek. “Have you ever been with another mare before?”

That question’s kind of out of nowhere. “Not another mare. Not a pony, I mean. I’ve been with human girls, though. Nothing really long term, though.”

“Oh. I think I get it.” Rainbow says. “I haven’t had many good relationships, either. My last one was probably the worst.” I almost don’t notice her shudder.

“Is it something you want to talk about?”

She shakes her head. “No. It ended badly. That’s all I’ll say about it.”

With how she said that, I almost don’t want to know about it. I’m curious about it, though. For better or worse, I’ll probably hear about it later. If this relationship with Rainbow keeps going, that is. “Are there any other relationships you’d like to talk about? I mean, this is our second date. If we’re going to keep doing this, we should get to know more about each other.”

“Is that something you did on Earth?”

I shrug. “Some did. I never really did, to be honest. I was bad like that during my relationships.” I sigh. “I’d like to this time, partially so I can change myself for the better. I’d also like to know more about the Equestrian culture.”

“Alright, then.” Rainbow says. She lies down next to me on her stomach. “I’ve dated a few others. There was this stallion I was with for about a week. Nothing serious. Just a few dates. We only kissed once. We stopped after this other bitch came along.” She says. I can tell she’s pissed off about what happened. I know exactly what happened between the three of them just by her tone.

“Sorry. I’ve been in that situation before.”

“Yeah. There was this gryphon I was with for a while.” She says, replacing her angry tone with one that sounds more… lost. “I knew her since we were just fillies. We dated for about a year before she had to move a few years later. She showed up in Ponyville sometime last year. We reunited. It was good for about a day. I found out the hard way she turn into a complete and utter bitch.” She says, hiding her face in a pillow.

“You won’t have to see her again, Rainbow.” I say, stroking her mane.

“Good.” She sighs. She raises her head and looks up at me. "Still got that wine?"

I smile. "Yep. How much do you want?"

"Enough to get me drunk." She says.

We spend the next few hours drinking as much alcohol as our bodies will allow. Some drink to remember. Some drink to forget. I know what Rainbow's doing with it. I'm not sure how I'm using it.

After at least ten cups, Rainbow looks like she's about to vomit. "Hold up, Marf..." She says to me before she takes her next cup. "It's kinda loud. I'mma do somethin' 'bout it." She stands up and staggers out the tent. With just the words she's used so far, I can tell she's drunk. Very drunk.“Hey ocean!” Rainbow shouts. “Could ya shut up for a minute? I’m tryin’ to sleep. Don’ make me get my… my guy to learn you up a lesson! He’ll teach you up a bit of stuff about noises!” I crawl out of the tent. Listening to her ranting at the water is funny enough. Seeing it has to be better.

At least it would if Rainbow wasn't on the sand looking like she's asleep. I walk to her and pick her up. She isn't very heavy, surprisingly. Now that I think about it, her light weight makes sense. She's kind of like a bird. Birds have hollow bones. She probably does, too. I carry her to the tent.

Rainbow falls asleep in that position some time later. I leave the tent, partially to escape her snoring. It’s night outside. I look up. The entire sky is completely full of stars. Like it was before, it’s breathtaking. This is a sight I doubt I’ll ever get used to. Part of me doesn’t want to. I want to just look up at the sky at night and always be amazed by this beautiful sight.

A faint hissing hissing distracts me. A snake must have wandered into our makeshift campsite. Call me strange, but having lived in a big city for my entire life, I’ve never ran into many snakes. I can count the amount of snakes I’ve seen in real life on one hand. That includes the ones I've seen at the zoo. My brother did tell me a bit about snakes and how to not get bit by them. Grab them at the base of the head. Snakes are fast, but I think I can do that. I’ll grab this snake and show it to Rainbow after she wakes up. If she doesn't think I'm badass already, she will after this. I move to the noise and move a bush out of the way.

The thing behind the bush isn't a snake. It's a chicken. Part of it is, at least. The head is a chicken. The rest resembles a dragon. The thing's eyes glow green. I hear a noise that reminds me terribly of the scene from Clash of the Titans with Medusa. I take a step back. This fucker is going to turn me into stone.

My legs stiffen and I fall backwards. My head bounces off a rock and makes my vision blur. I close my eyes.

I crawl back as best as I can with my legs stuck in their position. Crawling backwards is hard enough. Crawling backwards with closed eyes is even harder. Crawling backwards with closed eyes and stiff legs is next to impossible.

My head bumps into a tree. “Fuck! Somebody! Help!” I’m not normally one to scream for help. Since I’ve got a gorgon that’s probably thirsty for my blood, I’m a little bit more than desperate for my life. I’ve already died once. I don’t want to die again. And I don’t want to be killed by a fucking chicken.

The chicken makes a noise at me. It sounds like a mix of a regular chicken's squawks and a snake hissing. The only other sound I hear is my heart beating loudly.

"HEY!" A voice shouts. Less than a second later, I hear the sound of bones breaking. “Holy shit, Mark! Are you okay?” The voice says again. I hope it's Rainbow Dash. I can’t identify it. My heartbeat is too loud.

“Who is it?”

“Rainbow Dash. Are you okay?”

“I don’t know.” I open my eyes. Rainbow’s eyes are bloodshot. “What the fuck was that thing?”

“Cockatrice. I’ve ran into one before.” Rainbow says, looking at the direction of the chicken thing. It's more than five meters away. It’s not moving. I hope it’s dead.

I look to my legs. They’re completely covered in some gray material. I try to move them. Nothing happens. I look up at Rainbow. “I can’t move my legs.”

“Shit.” She looks at them. “Oh, shit.” She turns back to the cockatrice, then back to me. She moves so fast that I think she teleports. She returns in less than two seconds. “Shit. I killed the cockatrice.”

“Why does it matter? Isn’t that a good thing?”

“No. They’re the only things I know of that can undo this.”

“Oh fuck no. So I’m stuck like this?”

“Probably…” She says slowly. “Maybe Twilight can help you? I’m sure she’s got a spell…”

“What if she can’t?”

“Maybe Zecora can.”

“Who?”

“She’s a zebra. She lives around here.”

“What if she can’t help?”

“Then Princess Celestia and Princess Luna will find a way.”

“Then get one of them.”

“I’m not going to leave you alone, Mark.”

“I don’t give a fuck! Get somepony!”

“You’re legs are stone!”

“Do you think I don’t fucking know that? I’ll be fine. Get somepony.”

“What if a timber wolf comes around? You won’t be able to defend yourself.”

“Then fly fast.”

She sighs. “Okay… I’ll be back as soon as possible.” She hesitates to go.

"Go." I tell her firmly. She flies off for help.