Corpulane

“Alright, team!” bellowed Rainbow Dash. “Everypony up for a hard day’s work?”

The rest of the Pegasi gave their affirmative cheers.

“Plenty of clouds have made their way across the sky over here, so put your wings into it!” ordered Rainbow Dash. “Cloudchaser, Flitter, I know you two especially shouldn’t be having any troubles, though some of you, I’d like to see more than you’ve been showing lately. Particularly Thunderla-“

She paused, not seeing the dark grey stallion anywhere. This caused her to let out an exaggerated sigh and facehoof.

“…Excuse me, fillies and gentlecolts,” she dismissed herself, and flew off.

“No no no, please let me buy that sword!” complained Thunderlane at the screen as he gripped his controller frustratedly. He sighed. “I’d better go defeat some more flying eyes and scorpion bugs. Well, I’ll get off my lazy plot and-“

“-rearrange some clouds?”

Thunderlane dropped the controller and yelped as he turned his head to face the source of the voice – the authoritative and bossy Rainbow Dash.

“We’ve got an influx of clouds on our hooves, Thunderlane! We can’t have you in bed!”

Thunderlane sighed through the nostrils at having his daily luxury time interrupted, and slowly headed to the door, Rainbow Dash right behind him.

After walking a few yards away from his home, Thunderlane looked back. Rainbow Dash was gone.

He snuck back into the house, surveying his surroundings as he did so. Maybe nopony would notice and he could-

-be ejected back outside via a buck to the rump. Rainbow Dash had used her powers of stealth and hidden in Thunderlane’s house, just in case he hadn’t given up on lazing around all day. With a sore rear, Thunderlane slowly flew towards the rest of the group, Rainbow following before going ahead of him.

Rejoining her group of cloudkickers, Rainbow started flying next to Eff Stop. “I swear, he hasn’t changed a bit since when we head to create the 800-wingpower tornado,” she complained.

“I know, right?” replied Eff. “What a lazy fatass.”

For a few moments, Rainbow Dash did not speak nor move. A grin could be seen slowly spreading across her face.

“Just you wait until work is done for today…” she said with a hint of anticipation in her voice.

“Uh… sure?” replied Eff, shrugging.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Pegasi had worked hard to shift the clouds around into better positions, and now everypony could call it a day.

Rainbow Dash, however, still had one more job to do. Right, if I know Thunderlane, he’ll be ordering a pizza any minute now, she thought. With that, she started to fly. She kept doing so until she caught sight of the establishment:

‘UNCLE DIADATO’S PIZZA PLACE: EAT-IN AND DELIVERY’

Instead of heading through the regular entrance door for customers, she went around the back of the sky building to see a door: ‘EMPLOYEES ONLY’. And so, Rainbow Dash was in.

Of course, since she was without a uniform, plus nopony had ever seen her in the kitchen before, she attracted some confused looks when she entered.

“I’m the, er, inspector,” she fibbed.

Everypony nodded and got back to work.

Now, Rainbow searched around the kitchen. Sure, there were dozens upon dozens of pizzas, but she was looking for something for her plan. A plan that would suit just how she and other Pegasi felt about Thunderlane’s attitude.

She opened a cupboard door and found something interesting. More pizzas, packagaed in differently-colored and more basic boxes. She grabbed one and inspected the box all over.

Now that she knew this was what she needed, she grabbed a bunch of boxes and flew off, this time to a room filled with ponies sitting at desks with telephones.

She grabbed one the moment she heard it ring. “Hello?” came a mare’s voice on the other end.

Rainbow gave the phone back to the operator, as the customer was not who she was looking for.

After picking up and slamming down a few more phones… yes! She had finally locked on with her target. “Why, hello,” she said, doing her best to have a different-sounding voice. “May I help you?”

“Yeah, can I get a large pizza?” came Thunderlane’s voice.

“Certainly. What would you like?” replied Rainbow.

Before she could continue, she was tapped on the back, so she turned around.

“Aren’t you the inspector?” asked the mare.

“Yeah, I am, uh… inspecting the phone,” said Rainbow Dash.

“Fair enough,” commented the mare, and went about her business.

Rainbow’s conversation resumed. “So what do you want?”

“Anything will do,” replied Thunderlane.

“Great, makes things easier for me – er , us,” said Rainbow. “We’ll be there soon.” She slammed the phone down and grabbed a stallion’s hat. “Mind if I inspect this hat, buddy?”

“No,” said the stallion. “It’s itchy, anyway.”

Rainbow Dash put it on, and cringed from the itchiness. “Yes, very. I’ll just keep this on me for a while for… inspection purposes.” And so she grabbed a pizza box and flew off.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Wearing the stolen hat, and carrying the stolen pizza, she knocked on Thunderlane’s door, waiting until it was answered. “Here you go!” said Rainbow Dash in her fake voice again.

Thunderlane wasn’t paying attention to detail, he simply gave the deliverypony some Bits and grabbed the pizza.

Now that the stallion had fallen for it, Rainbow flew off and hid, intending to watch Thunderlane…

Meanwhile, Thunderlane was contemplating. Should he eat it here?

He flew off, having decided to eat in a secluded spot where it was unlikely that somepony would bother him as he ate.

He reached his special spot, lying down on a cloud. Even better that he was alone for what he was about to do next…

He grabbed the entire pizza out of the box and greedily jammed it into his mouth whole. It was quite a gross sight, but hey, why else would he be alone? He made quick work of the dough, cheese, tomato sauce, and toppings before licking his muzzle clean of the remains and rubbing his belly, which he noticed had gained some pudge. That doesn’t seem so worrying, decided Thunderlane. That was a 100% pizza I just wolfed down.

He thought that would be it and he could go home, albeit alightly pudgier. However, he saw that it was not over yet – his stomach was still growing a bit.

“Geez, better lay off the junk food for a while,” he mused.

His casual demeanor towards the extra weight wore off when he still didn’t stop bloating. More and more his belly expanded out. He poked it with the tip of his hoof. “Okay, maybe this is something to be worried about…”

The sides of his belly started to grow too as well as the front part. “Like, really worried!” he went on, worrying.

He grabbed the empty box of the pizza, and went wide-eyed with pure shock when he saw:

‘Calorie count: 134,0099’

As he continued to grow even more still, Thunderlane had an idea of what must have happened: the pizza he had just so ravenously consumed had had so many calories, that it was causing him to keep fattening up noticeably, rather than only notice after it had happened.

He attemptd to fly off so he could get help, but he discovered that was not within the realm of possibilities, as he had too much extra weight to move easily, and even his wings were gaining fat!

“HELP!” he cried as his next plan. But alas, he had gone too far away from the rest of Cloudsdale, and nopony heard his cries and came to his rescue.

And so Thunderlane lay there helpless to do anything as his body continued to inflate with fats. The area in which his legs connected to the rest of his body became less and less separated and more and more unified with flab. The limbs themselves became thicker and softer, filling with fat like the rest of him, and no longer touched the cloud he was on due to his expanding belly becoming too big for that, causing his limbs to be lifted off. His barrel was getting large enough that it started to gain rolls, making him like dollops of thick pancake batter dropped onto each other. His rump was getting curvier and larger, growing out, and his hind legs started to become less noticeable, being under it, and soon enough, his two buttcheeks were about the size of three times a cider barrel. His smooth, round, squishy, deep plot was no exception to the size-increasement the pizza was causing him. It too went into layers like the rest of his body. His two copies of his cutie mark stretched out to several times its regular size to accommodate his newly-massive flanks, part of his succulent, elephantine backside that even the most self-reserved of ponies would want to give a generous spanking. His neck and chin were no more, being engulfed with fat and breaking the separation between his head and torso. His cheeks looked as if he was holding his breath, whether he was or not.

It was left ambiguous to Thunderlane as to when he would stop expanding, and that moment was not now. At the moment he had thought about that, he had been the size of a gala carriage, but he surpassed even that. He was getting so corpulent, even the biggest of pigs (which was what he felt like) at Sweet Apple Acres would have advised him to go on a diet. But this experience was making him afraid to eat anything ever again.

And at last… it stopped.

Now that his form was not changing, the colossal bucket of lard that was once Thunderlane was able to properly focus on himself. He was now shaped much more like a submarine than a pony, the average of which would fit into him at least eleven times. The fact that the cloud had not given way under him was nothing short of a miracle. He was unworthy of being considered a Pegasus, as he could no longer even move, let alone fly. His ears drooped against his (flabby) skull as more fitting names were cropping up in his head… butterball… roly-poly… hippopotamus…

He realized that those names were not just being thought in his head. There was a voice saying them.

“That can come later, I’d better check up on him…” said the distant voice.

And then, touching down right in front of him was Rainbow Dash, much to Thunderlane’s dismay and humiliation. The only good point he had thought of was that nopony was seeing what had become of him, but it seemed that the cruelty of fate could not afford him even that.

Rainbow Dash’s eyes widened and her lips quivered for a few moments before she fell back and burst into hysteric laughter. “BAHAHAHAHA! OH! OH! I knew there was a reason that pizza wasn’t available for consumption, but this is way bigger than I expected!”

Thunderlane took a few moments to process what Dash had just said. “Wait… y-you did this?!”

“You bet I did!” replied Rainbow. “Myself and the other Pegasi agree that you can be lazy sometimes, so I decided… if you want to act like an immobile fatty, you can be an immobile fatty!”

“And look at you now!” she went on. “You’re nothing but a huge chunk of dough! I’m sure you’d know how it feels, since you handle pizza all the time.”

This revelation, as well as the insults, were making Thunderlane angry, it went without saying.

“I could use you as a bed! No no, not just me, all my friends!” Rainbow Dash continued. “You use beds too much, it’s time you know how it feels to be one!”

She fluttered on top of Thunderlane and trotted around on him… then it was a few moments later she realized she should not have done that. During those few moments, she fell off his huge ass, and her having been on him had caused Thunderlane to tip backwards after Rainbow hit the ground. Before she could move away, most of her body – only her rear legs were visible – became smothered in fleshy grey expanse…

Thunderlane, satisfied, knew he had the upper hoof now. And now that Rainbow Dash had become trapped under his giant buttocks, the main thing on his mind had gone from ‘I am now an impossibly-obese blob’ to ‘Get revenge on Rainbow Dash’.

“You know, Rainbow Dash…” said Thunderlane. “That pizza you gave me had some lovely toppings.” His stomach gurgled with acid. “There was broccoli…”

A gurgling was heard again, slightly lower in his digestive system.

“Eggs…”

There was more rumbling, even lower.

“Onions…”

His gut made sounds again, this time closer to his gargantuan tushie.

“And let’s not forget the mashed beans…”

The noises of Thunderlane’s digestive system had moved right up close to Dash, who, with an impending sense of dread and horror, knew exactly what was about to happen. She desperately tried to escape, but it was useless. The big-ass big ass had her stuck firmly to the cloud surface, and it was no mystery that begging for mercy would not help her in the slightest.

Now that he could feel the pressure in his abdomen, Thunderlane began his assault:

*FFRRPPTTT!*

Rainbow Dash, having her face right under Thunderlane’s butt, was instantly exposed to his noxious gases, and it was horrific. It was like rotten eggs and the decaying ingredients inside Thunderlane. The only thing she could cover her muzzle with was Thunderlane’s smelly behind, which obviously would not be of much help. She tried to escape, but to her horror, it didn’t just fail; it also made her submerge her head further between Thunderlane’s blubbery asscheeks, causing his asshairs to tickle her nose and her to see nothing but pitch-black darkness.

*FFFFFFFFFRRRRRRPPPPPPTTTTTTTTT!!*

“OH DEAR CELESTIA, I CAN TASTE IT!!” screamed Rainbow, albeit muffled, in anguish as the onslaught of flatulence went on. It had almost twice the strength of the second one, due to her head being much closer to the source, and as she was crying out loud, Thunderlane’s farts were hitting her tastebuds as well as her nostrils, and the taste made the Baked Bads seem like a quadruple ice cream sundae special. Before, she had thought that flatulence was limited to a bit of annoyance, but this was nostril torture.

*…frpt! FRRRPPTT*

This time, Thunderlane’s expulsions carried with them anal liquids, spraying her nose. Rainbow hoped very desperately that the methane and various other properties of Thunderlane’s farting would cause her to pass out.

Thunderlane, meanwhile, was enjoying every moment of Rainbow’s suffering. The fact that he, like most ponies, wasn’t bothered by his own farts, meant he could take pleasure fully with the satisfaction that he was giving the ruthless and insensitive prankster just what she deserved.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Hey, do you know where I could find Fluffy Clouds?” asked Clear Skies to Open Skies, whom he had just flown up to.

“…there’s some over there…” replied Open Skies with a weird look, pointing at a random bunch of clouds.

Clear Skies facehoofed. “Nopony ever understands…” He stopped as he heard a voice that seemed to be coming from the clouds, along with what sounded like… fart noises? Putting a hoof over his muzzle, he flew closer to hear better (with Open following)… and went through the wall of clouds to see a large dark grey lump. Perplexed, the two Pegasus stallions went to inspect it more, and saw there was a head attached.

“…Wow, you would really do well to lay off the nachos, tubby,” said Clear derisively, though he was at the same time surprised at the sheer plumpness of the Pegasus.

“Pizza,” corrected Thunderlane, not amused, stopping his gas bombs for the moment.

Clear and Open heard a muffled voice again, and noticed what appeared to be two legs sticking out from under Thunderlane. They put their hooves on his backside, causing them to sink deep into his flesh, but were still able to use all their might to push Thunderlane forward to slowly reveal Rainbow Dash, who flew up and took an enormous deep breath of fresh air, as if she had just swam from the ocean floor to the surface.

“Just what is going on?” asked Open, clearly confused.

“This tub of lard was just farting right on my muzzle!” yelled Rainbow, pointing a hoof at Thunderlane while still looking at the two stallions present who had average builds.

“Only because she turned me into what you see before you!” argued Thunderlane.

“Okay, okay, keep it together, you two,” urged Clear. “We’ll get this all worked out.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“I’ll listen to your side of the story later, Rainbow Dash,” affirmed Twilight now that she was at the scene. “For now, Thunderlane needs the quickest weight loss program available.”

She lit her horn, and as she did so, Thunderlane’s layers and pounds slowly melted away, making him smaller and smaller until he was delighted to see that he was back to his normal self again.

“Wow… thank you very much, Princess Twi,” said Thunderlane appreciatively. “…Um, that experience was quite distressing… does this mean I can have the day off tomorrow to recover?” he asked, chuckling.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Well, Rainbow Dash…” said Twilight, now that she had heard from both parties exactly what had happened and pieced the accounts together to make an adequate telling. “Did you learn any lessons from this? I presume this has scared you off from pulling pranks ever again…”

“Not really,” said Rainbow, noticeably recuperated from the horror of Thunderlane’s emissions. “Just taught me not to get trapped under obese pony’s butts.”

Twilight sighed. She did not remember the last time Rainbow had legitimately learned a lesson. Well, at least she was being honest this time.

And so the cycle continued… Rainbow Dash causing mischief, the mischief backfiring on her, Twilight bailing her out…

Still, Dash did, from that point on, seem quite apprehensive whenever she saw Thunderlane eating.