Ch 02: The Great Outdoors
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Fallout Equestria: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Ch 02: The Great Outdoors

FoE: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Chapter II: The Great Outdoors
"It's a dangerous business, going out of your door. You step onto the road, and if you don't keep your feet, there's no telling where you might be swept off to." – Lord of the Rings

System Report: 0000000002
Unit Status: Active
Location: Canterlot
(Exact Location Unknown: Satellite Signal Error, GPS Offline)
Begin data dump to external off-site memory back-up:

- - - - - Done.
Preparing visual report: Done.

Date: Unknown
Time: Unknown

Pink.

Everything in visual range was a misty pink. Like, cotton candy pink. Bubble gum pink. The other term for lightish-red. Pink up and down the street. And it was thick. I could barely see the buildings 25 meters away from me. My E.F.S. wasn't much help. All it did was point out hostile targets. Crap.

My quick reaction time was the only thing that saved me from a diving zombie pony. I rolled and came up with the zebra rifle ready, and put three rounds into the creature. Two rounds struck in its chest, lighting it ablaze, while the third passed straight through its left eye and out the back of its skull, painting the stairs we stood on a sick green color. I let out a breath (again with the breathing?) I didn't know I was holding and looked around.

The odds were not good.

A nanosecond of target acquisition told me there were too many to fight off, and the retreat option became available. I took it. I activated my wing pack and watched as a section of my back rose up, then extended a pair of wings. Both reached out ten feet from my body, were squared off at the end, but rounded along the front edge. The file told me something about aerodynamics and angle of attack, but all I really needed to know was I would be wicked fast with them.

A high pitched whine emanated from my hooves and I felt myself lift off the ground. A quick adjustment to their angle and lifting of my legs, I was soon soaring out over the crowd of zombies that had come to greet me. I looked back and smiled as they got further and further away. A small note on the subject of flying: always know what is in front of you. A proximity warning was all I got half a seconds before I plowed into an office building window. My body somersaulted but I landed upright somehow. I was fortunate to have crashed into a meeting room. Chuckling to myself, the lesson was learned and soon I was in the air again.

I flew over the city slowly, scanning below for signs of pony life. I could find nothing in my memory banks about the pink cloud that covered the city, but a glance at my map told me where I was at least. Canterlot. Well, that was something. I brought up a transparent map over my E.F.S. and tried to figure out what to do next.

Canterlot had no life in it, save for the zombies. I was half tempted to drop a few balefire eggs to solve the problem, but I decided against it. Better to save the ordinance for when I would really need it. Besides, the way the city was, I was likely to be the only pony ever coming back. Who in their right mind would want to come to a city overrun with zombies?

My eyes wandered over the map, coming to a rest on Fillydelphia. It was close, easily within my range, and the records showed another MoT R&D site there. They might have some info on why I was never activated. I activated a waypoint and adjusted course.

Well, I found Fillydelphia, all right. Rather, I found the crater where it once had been.
I was standing on the very edge of the giant hole in Equestria, and my radiation detector was clicking loudly. The readings showed +2rad/s. I knew I didn't need to worry about it, but I was glad I at least had a way to tell what I was getting.

There were a few toppled buildings around the rim, but my target had originally been located at the center of the city. I sighed and deleted the waypoint. No point in sticking around. Ears drooping, I turned to leave when the sound of gunfire played over the ruined landscape. A subroutine processed direction and decibel levels, then put a new waypoint on my E.F.S. compass. Curious, I followed.

The shots were coming from a half destroyed building, I found out. From the rate of fire, I guessed somepony else enjoyed the benefits of a chain gun. There was also the sound of an energy rifle firing off. Bright flashes and strobe light effects from inside confirmed my suspicions. In between shots, I could hear yelling. The combatants seemed to be taunting each other. My enhanced hearing picked up every word as I approached.

"That all ya got, steely filly?? I'm gonna shred ya'n take yer bloodied helmet fer a trophy!"

Ratatatatatat! Zap zap!

"Come and get it, Reaper pussy!"

Tink tink… BOOM! Somepony had tossed a grenade.

"You call that a throw?? My zombie grandma could throw better'n that!"

"Goddess, do you ever just shut up and die?"

Zap zap zap! Ratatat ratatatatat!

I peeked around the corner and saw two ponies shooting at each other. The chain gun-toting pony wore armor adorned with spikes everywhere. His mane and tail were cut real short, giving him the look of a zebra, minus the stripes. He had the chain gun propped up on a piece of fallen pillar and was firing across the building at another pony ducking behind another concrete chunk.

The second pony was wearing Steel Ranger armor. Attached to its saddle was a laser rifle (hah! I knew my guns) and was occasionally poking it around the corner of her cover and firing it blindly. The "reaper" had her pinned. She looked low on energy packs too, judging by the number of drained ones surrounding her. The reaper on the other hand seemed to have boxes of ammo.

I knew I needed to help, but help who? My first instinct was to help the Steel Ranger. Records showed they were loyal soldiers to Equestria, and were always to be trusted. The reaper, on the other hoof, looked crazed. The way he giggled and laughed as he pulled the trigger on his chain gun meant he clearly had something wrong with him.

My only dilemma was wondering if it was right to help the Steel Ranger. I had to know for certain. I stepped out into full view of both and announced myself.

"Pardon me," I said, and both heads quickly swiveled to look at me. "Which one of you is the good guy here?" The reaper laughed and pointed his chain gun at me. I dove back behind the wall as the burst passed through where I had been standing a nanosecond ago. That answers that, I thought dryly as I activated my combat shotgun.

"You idiot," the ranger shouted as she took the opportunity to fire some aimed shots. I heard the reaper yell in pain, then return fire at her. I stepped back out of cover and slipped into S.A.T.S. I targeted the hoof that held the chain gun steady first, then the ammo feeder to the backpack he carried. Making a quick check that I had solid slug rounds loaded, I released S.A.T.S. and let fly. He screamed again as the slug punched through his hoof. My next round smashed the feeder line for the ammo, spilling bullets on the ground. He cursed and dove behind cover again, dropping his chain gun as he fell. I advanced to closer cover myself, my eye on my E.F.S., as the Ranger leapt from her hiding spot and opened fire on the reaper.

"Shit," I heard him curse, then heard a clanking of a grenade hitting the far wall, followed by a massive explosion. Part of the wall fell away, and the reaper dove through the hole. The Steel Ranger made to follow him, but was blasted back by another explosion that had a sound like a circuit frying. The resulting blast sealed the exit. I searched for a way around the wall, but was discouraged by more rubble. I stowed my shotgun and returned to check on the Steel Ranger.

She was laying where the explosion had deposited her, her visor dark. I plugged into an access port on her flank, and did a quick diagnostic. She was alive inside, but her suit was without power. I reached over a hoof to her helmet and gently unsealed and removed it while my processor searched for the appropriate sequence to restart power armor.

As the helmet fell away, I was greeted by a blue coated mare. Her mane was candy apple red, and her eyes were vibrant purple. She let out an exasperated sigh as she looked up at me.

"So he got away, then?" I nodded. "Figures. Snake Skin is as slick as his namesake. Tenth time this week I've nearly had him."

"Why are you chasing him," I asked. "Big criminal? Did he help destroy Fillydelphia?"

"Wha- Help destroy-" the mare stammered at me, the look in her eyes suggesting she thought I was as crazy as that reaper. "Where have you been the past two hundred years?"

I dropped to my rump. Two hundred years? I'd been offline for two hundred and six years? While shocked at the revelation, new questions formed from my logic processor. Questions like, "why had I suddenly activated after two hundred years?" and so on. A hundred questions raced past my thought processor in the blink of an eye. The mare, unaware of what was happening inside me, continued.

"No, he's not a criminal. Well, no more than your average, insane reaper pony, but there aren't many of those out here."

I nodded dumbly. The sequence for her suits start-up flashed across my vision and I sent it to the proper place. It was going to be a slow process, so I asked her a few more questions. "If he's not a criminal, then what is he?"

She shrugged as much as she could. "Just another piece of wasteland trash, if you ask me. But definetely one that needs to be dealt with."

"And that's why they sent a Steel Ranger after him, I imagine."

"Former, actually," she replied. "I'm not with the 'illustrious order' anymore."

"I hear a story behind that," I said with a grin.

"Oh, it's not that exciting. A more exciting one would be yours, I think." She looked me over, noting the wire to her armor coming directly from my shoulder. The way my eyes shined golden reflected in her eyes, and I realized I didn't know what my face looked like, but apparently I had glowy eyes. "I'm gonna hazard a guess and say you're either partly or fully cyborg."

"What's a cyborg," I asked as I boosted power to her restart system. It was theoretically possible to increase the magical power going into a suit, thus reducing the start up duration, but the risk was an overcharge, which would result in a big pretty explosion with fireworks and lots of death for anyone nearby. I made sure I didn't get to that point.

"You know," she replied, eyeing me funny again. "A cyborg. Robot bits grafted onto living tissue?"

"New to me," I said. I was hesitant, for some reason. I wasn't totally sure she needed to hear the truth.

"Well you stash your shotty inside your ribcage, your eyes are brighter than my LED headlamp, and you have an interface for my armor coming right out of your shoulder. If that doesn't scream cyborg, then I've never been a Steel Ranger. So how about cluing me in?"

"I'm not sure I should," I told her honestly. "For one, I just met you-"

"And you're saving my life as we speak," she cut in. "That's pretty trusting for someone who won't tell me he's part robot."

"I see your point," I said with a sigh. I could at least give her the story so far, I guessed. So I did. I left out the grim details of my birthplace and all the technical stuff, and kept the story short and sweet. When I finished, she just stared at me. There seemed to be an almost hunger in her eyes.

"Boy," she said at last. "If the Elders of the brotherhood knew about you."

"From your tone, I take it that wouldn't be a good thing."

"For you," she replied with a chuckle. "For them it would be Winter Wrap-Up, the Summer Sun Celebration and the Lunar Equinox all rolled into one big 'happy birthday, Steel Rangers.'"

"Right, then I'd better keep my tail out of their hooves," I said, unplugging myself. I'd done what I could for her systems. "You should be able to at least get up and walk around now, but weapons are gonna take a little more time."

She stood and shook herself. "I'm amazed you got it started that quickly, but then I guess I shouldn't be, seeing as how you're a bot and all." She winced and looked over to me. "No offense."

"You didn't mean it in a derogatory way," I replied, waving it off with a hoof. "I'm fine."

"I'm Night Rose, by the way," she said, extending a hoof, which I shook. I hesitated mid shake when a realization hit me.

"I, uh… don't have a name," I stammered, embarrassed (this was truly a day for new sensations). "I only have a model number and such." I listed it off to her, and she gave a short laugh.

"Yeah, I'm not gonna remember even half of that. Need to find something else to call you." She picked up her helmet and attached it to a hook on her shoulder, just below her laser rifle. "While we think, lets head back to my hide away. It's getting dark, and dark plus Filly crater equals dangerous for any pony."

Night Rose led me a mile back from the crater rim to a collapsed sewer entrance. A quick series of taps on the metal door next to it and we were inside, plunged into darkness as the door closed behind us. My night vision kicked on automatically and I took in my surroundings. The room was spacious, with enough room to trot to the far end if you wanted.

"Old Ranger weapons stash house," she explained, turning on the lights and hanging her weapon on a rack just inside the doorway. "We'd cleaned it out last time we were hitting the Crater for old tech. That's how I knew it was here, and how to get in."

"Handy," I said. "I'd bet they have several of these around the wasteland."

"You'd win," Night Rose replied. "The Rangers know how to plan for worst-case scenario. They travel around a whole lot, looking for tech."

"Bet they help out the populace too, right?" I didn't get an answer, and when I looked over at her, I was greeted with a pained look. "They don't?"

"Look," she said as she slowly pulled herself out of her armor. "I don't know what records you've been going off of, but they're painfully out of date. Anything you think you know about the Rangers, I suggest you bin it. Toss it out, it doesn't apply anymore."

"Okay, but-"

"'But'nothing," she yelled, a fire in her eyes. She stared coldly at me, not breaking eye contact to make sure I got the message. "The Steel Rangers aren't in the business of protecting ponies anymore. Hell, they do the exact opposite if there's some tech involved. They'd obliterate a town for a spark battery and not even bat an eye about it. Write them off. They're not here to help any pony. Period."

I nodded, not knowing what to say. My voice analysis software detected some serious rage and pain as she spoke. This went deep for her. Real deep. "Why are you so angry at them?"

"No," she said, waving me off with a hoof. "I'm not going there tonight. Get me drunk sometime and I'll consider it. But for now, I'm going to bed." She turned and lay down on a mattress in the corner, facing the wall. "There's another bed down at the other end," she said with a toss of her head to indicate the direction. "Don't know if you need it or not, but you can use it. See you in the morning." And with that, our conversation was over.

I watched her for several minutes, pondering the info she'd given me. Taking a few cycles, I sped up my thought process. The world slowed around me as I began to analyze in my own way.

Ok, lets recap. The world's destroyed or at least seriously maimed. Canterlot, Fillydelphia, and every small town I've come across are vacant or dead. Equestria's heroes, the Steel Rangers, had turned into hoarding jerkbags, ponies fought each other, ponies are insane, and I somehow came online 200 years after it all went south with no clear purpose other than a will to help those who needed it. I'm nameless and friendless, but I'm armed to the teeth. Oh, and I seem to have some secret weapon in my chest. That about cover everything? Good. Now what?

My thought process ended there. I still had no clue as to what to do next. Clearly, that reaper pony guy was going to be a difficulty in the future. If he wasn't a threat to me, he would be to other ponies. Innocent ponies. If there were any out here, they needed protection from him. Looks like I found another temporary purpose.

While I technically didn't need to sleep, I figured it would be rude not to use the offered bed. Laying down on the stiff mattress, I took one last look at Night Rose. I noticed her cutie mark was a replica of her helmet. Did that mean she was good at being a Steel Ranger, or did it have a deeper meaning than that? Bah, too many questions. I gave her one last look-over, then laid my head on my forehooves. Making sure my radar was set to active, I shut down most of my functions, and for all intents and purposes, fell asleep.

oOoOoOo

I found myself in a familiar hallway. It looked exactly like the one outside the room I was born in. Seven other ponies in lab coats were looking up at me. Some had smiles on their faces. The one in the center, however, was looking at me with disdain. Her midnight blue coat seemed to shimmer in the artificial light, as did her silver hair. Her long horn suggested unicorn, but she also had wings that fluttered slightly as she examined me. Alicorn?

"I distinctly remember an order to shut down all robotics projects," the alicorn said. Her cobalt eyes bore into my own visual receptors. Yep, there was definitely disdain there.

"I know, Princess," one of the other ponies said. Her purple mane had a streak of pink going through it, matching the unicorn's indigo coat perfectly.

"Then why," the princess asked, pointing a hoof at me, "is this here?"

"Well, uhm," an orange mare said, seeming to stumble over her words. "Ya see… we were so close to finishin' him… so we figured… ya know… what's the harm?"

"Applejack," the alicorn said, turning back to the orange mare with blonde hair. Was she wearing a cowpony hat? "Please don't try to lie to me. Your element makes it painfully obvious." The pony looked sufficiently abashed. "Would someone else like to try with the truth please?"

"You see, dear- I mean, your highness…" This came from another unicorn, one pure white with purple hair. "We'd looked over all of the other models produced and we discovered exactly where we'd gone wrong. So we decided to try one more time."

"Against my express orders."

"Um… well, that is to say…"

"You went against me. If you six were any other ponies, you'd be up on treason charges."

All the other ponies cringed at the harsh words. The alicorn turned and faced them, her moon-shaped cutie mark coming into view. "What possible reason could you have for this?"

"We wanted to build a robot that could do more than just end the war," the rainbow maned Pegasus said, still looking ashamed, albeit less so than the other five. "We wanted a robot that would help ponies without being told to."

The alicorn looked around at all of them again. "And none of you thought I would be upset when you showed me this?"

"Well no," the pink one said happily. She practically bounced as she spoke. "We weren't going to show you like this anyway. We were going to hold a big 'Look At Our Bestest Best Ever Robot' Party! We wanted to show everypony that fighting wasn't the only way to solve things!" The last pony, a yellow Pegasus, could only nod in agreement. She looked far too scared to speak.

The princess turned and looked back at me, then sighed and looked back at the others again. "I know you ladies meant well," she said sadly, "but I'm afraid I must ask you to shut him down. Permanently. I gave that order for a reason, and you all know what it is. Now please. End it." She walked past the six ponies, sadness still on their faces. The one called Applejack sighed and, looking past me, nodded. I felt something plug into a port on my neck, and everything went dark. As I began to fade out, I heard the ladies one last time.

"Don't worry, girls. He won't be destroyed…"

oOoOoOo

My eyes lit the small area around my bed. I looked around, confused for a moment. Where was the hall? Where were the ponies? Why was it dark? The light fell on the form of a sleeping pony on the other side of the room. Slowly, I remembered where I was. As to why it was so dark, Night Rose must've turned the light off at some point. I could see her face now, scrunched up as the light hit her. I quickly shut off the lamps and activated night vision. Her face unscrunched and she mumbled something in her sleep. I breathed a sigh of relief.

What was that I'd just experienced? Not a dream. Robots didn't dream. Did they? Maybe a memory that somepony had thought they'd erased. Why it had resurfaced during my downtime, I had no idea. I lay my head back down, but left my vision on. I had yet more things to ponder.

Footnote: Level up!

New Perk: Action Pony – You slip in and out of S.A.T.S . like an old pro. You now gain back 25% of your energy on a critical hit to an enemy. Your energy is also increased 15%.

Ch 03:Objective
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Fallout Equestria: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Ch 03:Objective

FoE: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Chapter III: Objective

"You have a shooty look." – P-21 to Blackjack, FoE: Project Horizons

System Report: 0000000003
Unit Status: Active
Location: Fillydelphia
(Satellite Signal Error, Attempting To Repair… Error: Signal Corrupted)
Begin data dump to external off-site memory back-up:

- - - - - Done.
Preparing visual report: Done.

Date: --/--/2212, 200PA (Post-Apocalypse)
Time: 0600 Local

Morning.

You'd never be able to tell it was morning by looking at the sky. All you could see when you looked up was grey. But it was a light grey, so the sun was up there somewhere. I stood outside the shelter, scanning the clouds. Why was it always so cloudy?

"Don't bother looking for sky," I heard behind me. Night Rose had emerged, looking disheveled and sleepy. "The wingboners won't open the clouds to let us dirt ponies see it."

"Why not?" Wingboners?

"They lost one city and turned into a race of pussies. Cranked up the cloud-makers and cut us off from Celestia's sun and Luna's moon. Goddess damned cowards."

"They just ran away," I asked, turning to look at her. I'm pretty sure I had a look of disbelief on my face. The thought that the Pegasi would just turn tail and run didn't sound logical at all.

"One and all," Night Rose nodded. "Some of them came back down, I heard, but they were ostracized by the rest of the featherbrains. Basically, if you came down from the clouds, you're a traitor or something like that."

I looked up at the clouds again. "What about Rainbow Dash or the Shadowbolts? Or even the Wonderbolts?"

"Dash was one of the ones to come down. First one, I think. Any that followed her were labeled Dashites. As for the Shad's and the Wonder's, who knows? Probably joined their beloved Enclave."

"How do you know all that?"

"Ran into a Pegasus in Friendship City named Radar. He didn't like talking about it much, but he did give some decent intel." She yawned and stretched out. "Shit, I need some coffee."

Night Rose left me staring into the sky in search of her brown death fluid. My logic processor went over everything I'd just been told. It didn't make sense. Or maybe it made perfect sense and I just hadn't been active long enough to see it. I had only been online for two days, fourteen hours, twenty minutes, and eighteen seconds. The only things I knew for certain were Reapers were bad, Steel Rangers were greedy, and the world had gone to hell in a hoof-basket two hundred years back.

Yeah. Great time to be awake.

An hour later, Night Rose re-emerged, dressed in her power armor. Her helmet was again hooked on her shoulder. She gave another yawn as she sealed the shelter door behind her. "So, what's your plan, then?"

"I don't have one yet," I replied with more than a hint of sadness.

"Well, until you do, I guess you can hang around with me. I still got a Reaper to take out. Wouldn't mind the assistance."

"Sure," I said half-heartedly. "Whatever you need." Depression now. What emotion didn't I have?

She looked at me sideways and punched me in the shoulder. Which hurt. "Don't be like that. You'll figure something out."

We started toward the Crater, my E.F.S. and radar on active search mode. I picked up quite a few red dots, but they all turned out to be either mutated bugs or some zombie-fied creature. If the Reaper was still here, he was laying real low. Half the day passed without finding a trace of him. I could tell Night Rose was frustrated. I could see it in her eyes. She didn't let it show in her voice though. She kept trying to give me a name to pass the time.

"Metal Flank."

"No," I replied. "That was a terrible rock band, from what my records say. I'd rather not be associated with them."

"Oh, who's gonna know that out here?"

"I'd rather not take the chance of running into someone who does."

"Ok. Cyber Hunter."

"For the time being, lets steer clear of names alluring to me being a bot, okay?"

"Good idea," she replied with a nod. "Let's look at you then. Glowing eyes, wires for hair, camouflage coat… How about Urban Stalker?"

"Stalker?" I eyed her incredulously. "That's kind of dark, don't you think?"

"Well you're shooting down all the good names," she replied. "I'm running out of ideas here."

I was about to reply when a round ricocheted off of the wall near Night Rose's head. She dove for cover immediately as I tracked the bullet's trajectory and fired off a burst from my zebra rifle. I didn't hit anything, but whoever it was ducked back under cover. I heard a strange, mad laughter float across the street to us. It didn't sound like the Reaper's voice. It was female, and it was joined by several others.

"Raiders," Night Rose cursed as she donned her helmet. "At least we'll see some decent action, now."

"Tell me you weren't hoping for a fight," I said as I watched several ponies break cover and charge us. They all wore similar, patched together armor. A few were carrying melee weapons in their mouths, while three with guns hung back and shot from cover.

"Not them, no," Night Rose replied as she rose from cover and opened fire with her energy rifle. One of the charging raiders was hit dead center in the chest and disappeared into a pile of pink glowing ash. "I was just getting anxious is all."

I switched to the mini chain gun as a few rounds found my body. I winced as the pain reception center registered the hits. I disliked the MoWT more and more. I sprayed the raiders in cover with a quick burst, then turned on the ones charging. Thanks to Night Rose's accuracy, they were down to just four from the seven they'd started with. My own shots reduced that to two. The other two seemed to either not notice or not care that they were the only ones left. They leapt over Night Rose's cover and swung their weapons at her.

I slipped into S.A.T.S. and locked onto the one I had a best shot at. He was still turning around to take a swing at Night Rose. In the time-stopped magic of the spell, I got a good look at him. Brown coat, red mane and tail, eyes wild and joyful. He was in a berserk insanity and with the red lines in his eyes, probably on some kind of enhancement drug. He was gleefully spinning to put his hunting knife into Night Rose's throat. My S.A.T.S. guided shots ended that fantasy. The burst ripped him in half, his spinning back half continuing to turn as his front half went flying from the inertia of the initial move. He died with that smile on his face.

Night Rose parried the other raider's swing with her energy rifle, and swung a buck back at her. The crazed mare dodged it and came back with her sledgehammer, scoring a glancing blow on her flank. Night Rose used the momentum from the strike to bounce her flank off the other mare's body, knocking her back a few feet.

I would have watched more, marveling at how fluidly she moved in that heavy armor, but there were still three raiders with guns shooting at us. They'd decided to forego cover and were shooting wildly now. I switched to the shotgun and unloaded three rounds of solid slug into the lead pony, taking her off her feet but not killing her. The armor had barely saved her hide.

The other two leapt over her prone body, one giggling wildly. I rapidly switched to buckshot, and let loose a few rounds, spraying the air with painful deadly metal. The female of the two screamed and fell, hooves clutching her face as blood poured out of wounds inflicted, while the other dove behind a wooden box. I similarly took cover, upturning a table and ducking behind it. It wouldn't hold for long but it would do. My E.F.S. showed only two dots of red. The first raider was back on her hooves and hiding behind another piece of cover. My enhanced hearing picked out the sound of ponies reloading rifles, as well as one screaming and thrashing on the ground. I'd shot out her eyes apparently. She wasn't a threat anymore, her marker showing gold on my E.F.S.

Behind me, Night Rose had pinned her opponent on the ground and had her hooves wrapped around her neck. I could hear the struggle, then the pop as the raider's neck broke under the power armor's pressure. With a satisfied huff, she dropped the body and dropped back into cover.

"You alright," I called back to her, looking her direction. She just waved back to me, and put a few shots into the wooden box cover. I poked my shotgun over my cover and let off a round, listening as the buckshot impacted wood, dirt, rubble and cement. I used that sound to pick out the raider's exact position. Without putting my shotgun away, I opened my left flank compartment and levered the balefire egg launcher. I loaded a round, and angled it to what I calculated was ten feet behind their positions. I glanced at my E.F.S. to see where the wounded one had ended up and saw she had dragged herself close to my position. Good. I didn't want her caught in the blast.

"Rose," I yelled, "head down now!" I then launched the egg out over my cover and curled up into the smallest ball I could. The egg whistled into the air, hit its apex, and turned earthward. The explosion on impact was deafening for anyone who wasn't wearing ear protection. I watched as the two red dots disappeared from my scope. The concussion wave hit my table cover half a second later and shattered it. I was lifted and thrown fifteen feet back, landing in a heap. The blinded raider landed on top of me with a heavy thump.

When the smoke cleared and the sound died, I opened my eyes and surveyed the damage. Personally, I was fine. I had a few cuts, but they were repairing already, and the bullet holes from earlier were already sealed. The mare that had landed on me was unconscious now, her ice blue head having smacked on my hide. It may have been covered with self-repairing skin, but it was still metal beneath, and unforgiving for hard impacts.

I looked over at Night Rose. She was already extracting herself from the wreckage of the box that had broken over her cover, looking none the worse for wear. We both looked at the impact site, and I heard her breath catch in her throat.

There was a new crater five feet deep, blackened and charred from the balefire explosion. Fires burned on debris nearby. There was nothing left of the raiders. Or the building they'd come out of.

I gently moved the unconscious raider off of me and trotted over to Night Rose, giving her a quick bio-scan. (Thank you, Ministry of Peace.) Inside the armor, she was unhurt, but she'd absorbed quite a few RADS from the blast. She'd need some RAD-Away soon. She barely registered my presence until I nudged her with my nose. She looked at me, startled, then back at the crater.

"Fuck," she said at last. "You don't do anything half way do you?" I said nothing in reply. I just stared at the crater I'd created. I suddenly felt regret for what I'd done. There had been other ways to handle the situation. But at the same time, I felt elation. I'd survived, Night Rose had survived, and even the wounded raider was alive. I was glad for all three, and the experience had been kind of fun, too. I chuckled to myself quietly, drawing a sidelong look from Night Rose. I couldn't tell her expression, but I could guess it was one of confusion. "Don't tell me you enjoyed that."

"A little," I replied, turning back toward the wounded raider. "Come on. Let's head back to the shelter."

She moved to follow, but stopped short when she saw me pick up the raider. "You're not thinking of bringing that with us, are you?"

"No I'm not think of it," I replied. "I'm doing it."

"I'm not letting some raider scumbag into my shelter," she said hotly. "Better to put a bullet through her brainpan."

"She's hurt," I said.

"She'd have killed us," Night Rose retorted.

"But she didn't," I shot back. "She's hurt, and I'm gonna help her."

"Not with my meds you aren't." She galloped in front of me and put her rifle under my chin. "You are not bringing her back with us."

"Pull the trigger then," I replied, looking calmly into her visor. "I'm not leaving her to die out here. I'm better than that. And so are you."

"You don't know jack-shit about me," she spat. "She's trash from the wasteland. She's not worth saving. Hell, she's barely worth the gunpowder it'd take to put the bullet in her."

"That's your opinion," I said.

"Goddamned right it is," she shouted.

"And mine's that no one is above redemption. Everyone deserves a second chance."

"Not her."

"Why? Give me one good reason beyond her being a raider, and I'll let you end her."
Night Rose didn't answer. The end of the rifle came slowly away from my chin. She stepped back and stared at me, then turned and walked away. "On your head, then, what happens."

I breathed a sigh of relief and trotted after her, being careful not to let the mare slip off my back. "I don't do anything half way."

The trot back to the shelter took hardly any time at all. Reluctantly, Night Rose opened the door and let us in. I quickly trotted back to the bed I'd used the night before and laid my package on it. I looked around for a med kit briefly before one landed next to me. I looked over to Night Rose, but she had her backside to me as she stripped off her armor.

I quickly dug into the med kit and injected the still unconscious raider mare with a dose of Med-X. The cuts on her face slowly began to heal, as did her eyes, I found with a lift of her eyelid. Next I gave her a dose of RAD-Away, bucking another dose over to Night Rose with my hind leg.

"You're at 75 RADS," I told her as I forced the orange fluid down the raider's throat. "At worst, you'll get a stomach ache, but I doubt you'd enjoy it."

"What about your little marefriend," she asked as she popped open the package.

"She got much worse, but she'll be alright." I stood and turned towards Night Rose. "And before you ask, I plan to restrain her before letting her wake up. She is still a raider, like you said before."

"Might think about a muzzle too," Night Rose said dryly. She flopped down onto her bed and pulled out a magazine from the shelf next to her and began to pretend I wasn't helping a pony that had shot at us not an hour ago.

Finding something to tie the raider up with wasn't difficult. I used a spool of twine I'd found and wrapped all four of her legs together, then gave her a quick bio-scan. The results were a little strange. Physically, she was fine. Her ice blue coat covered her entire body, and her mane and tail were a deeper blue. Her cutie mark was a shotgun crossed over what looked like a smiling sunflower. It was when I got to her brain that irregularities showed up.

"What the hell," I said aloud as I finished the scan. "She's got some kind of imbalance in her brain."

"No shit," Night Rose said without looking up.

"No, seriously," I said. "It's like something got in her body and gave her a serious mind-fuck. And it's recent. Like, last week recent."

"And I care, why?"

"Night Rose, don't you get it? It's not her fault she's crazy!"

"Again, why do I care?" She'd finally put down the magazine and was looking at me. I didn't answer. Truthfully, I didn't know why I was excited to discover this. All I knew was it was significant and said as much to her. "So, it's not her fault she's Manticore-shit crazy. So what?"

"Is there a chemistry station in here?"

"Somewhere in the back, maybe," she said as she went back to her magazine. I hopped up and started rummaging through the various items in the room. As I searched, I sent out an electronic signal broad-waved to find an active relay and was fortunate to find one. I used it to send a signal to a coded terminal back at the MoTW R&D station I'd woken up in, queried it and connected with a still functioning mainframe in the local MoP building, then downloaded everything it knew about chemistry and biological makeups. Thank you, whichever ministry invented wireless uplinks. I closed the link down as I found what I was physically searching for and uncovered it. I then went to work decoding what I'd scanned in the mare's brain.

Two hours later, I heard the raider mare waking up. I'd made a lot of progress in fixing the imbalance, and had a syringe of the remedy ready. I trotted over to her, and injected it before she had a chance to protest. Watching her, it was like watching a veil being removed from her eyes. They lost the glossy look they had, and realization replaced madness.

"Wha… Where am I," she asked. "What's going on? Where's my son?"

"Relax," I said, trying to soothe her. "You're safe."

"Wow," Night Rose said as she came over. "Didn't think you could fix crazy."

"Wasn't easy," I said, but was interrupted by a screaming mare.

"Where is my son???"

Night Rose and I looked at each other, then she responded. "We don't know," Night Rose told her. "You were with a group of raiders when we captured you. There were no foals in the group."

The shock hit the mare all at once, and she shuddered as she lay her head back down. "Oh goddess, where is he? I need to find him. He wasn't a year old when… I can't remember!" She was becoming frantic now.

"Calm down," I said. "You're gonna give yourself a heart attack."

"I don't care," she screamed at me. She started to try to get to her feet but the twine hindered her. "I need to find him! I need to keep him safe!"

"I'll find him," I said, trying to calm her down. "Where were you that you can remember?"

"I don't know," she replied. "I think we were on the other side of the crater. We'd found a few crates of food. They didn't smell right but they were the only food we'd found all week. I don't remember a lot after that. Something involving a group of other ponies, and gunshots. And screaming… the screaming… oh Goddess…"

"Relax," Night Rose said, sounding caring. "We'll find him. You've got two of the best trackers in the wasteland here."

"Thank you," the mare said, finally settling down. "Do you think you could untie me?"

Night Rose looked at me as I scanned the mare again. "She's safe," I said at last. "So long as she doesn't freak out again, you can untie her. It's up to you."

Night Rose nodded, then leaned down to untie the knots. "Promise me you won't steal anything and you can walk around free here." The mare nodded, and was freed shortly after. "My name is Night Rose."

"Winter Frost," the mare said as she stood, stretching her legs. She then turned to me with a questioning look, as if expecting me to say something. Fortunately, Night Rose rescued me.

"He doesn't have a name. He was born without one." I was glad she remembered to keep my true origin under wraps. Sure, Winter was normal now, but that didn't mean she wouldn't freak out over an android. "You want some food? I promise it's still good."

Winter nodded, and followed her to a fridge. I watched then go, marveling at Night Rose's sudden turn-around in attitude, then headed for the door. I paused as I opened it, and looked back at the two mares. "You two be alright while I go look?"

"We'll be fine," Night Rose replied after setting a plate of radroach meat in front of Winter. "I'll stay here and keep your marefriend company."

I gave her a look that asked if she'd be ok watching her, and received one that said not to worry. How I knew what it meant, I don't know. I just nodded and closed the door behind me as I left. Giving the area a quick scan, I lifted off and flew straight over the Crater. My E.F.S. showed quite a few red dots as I landed. I wasn't taking any chances, either. I had my zebra rifle out and ready before I started searching.

My chronometer said I'd been searching for three hours when I found the crate of food. It was strewn about the store holding it, almost as if something or someone had decided tossing it about would be fun. I wasn't certain what had happened, but one thing was for sure. It was not fit for consumption. I took a piece for later analysis, then searched the building.

Upstairs, I ran into a nest of raiders. All of them had the same crazy giggle as Winter had. Unlike Winter, though, these had all been crazy long before. The brainwaves I scanned showed even worse degradation. I recorded the results as I fought my way through them.
As the last one fell, I heard a small sob come from a box in the corner. Cautiously, I lifted the box with the end of my rifle, and was greeted with the bluest eyes ever. The little colt looked at me with a terrified look. His jet black coat stood out against his pure white mane. He was emaciated badly.

"Hey there, little guy," I said, putting my rifle away. "You're alright now." The colt said nothing, his eyes welling with tears. I lowered myself to my knees, trying to be as non-threatening as possible. "Your mom misses you. You wanna go see her?" Again, no reply. Just more shuddering and tears. "I'll take you to her, I promise. You wanna see your mom, don't you?"

The colt didn't move for a bit. I'd made the offer. Now it was his move. He could bolt, come to me, or do nothing. All I could do is wait.

He finally stood on shaky legs and slowly walked toward me. He made it nearly all the way before collapsing. I caught him on my head, and gently rested him on my back. He was completely unconscious. I then slowly raised myself up and headed outside.

"Don't tell your momma I did this," I told him as I looked around. "I don't think she'd freak out, but I'd rather she not have to worry." I then popped my wings and took off, being careful not to make any hard turns or do anything to disturb the foal on my back.

The trip was uneventful. He was out the whole ride. I didn't think that was all that good a thing, considering how bad off he was, but I couldn't do anything until we got inside the shelter. Winter nearly tackled me when I entered.

"Oh goddess, is he alright? What's wrong with him? Is he alive?"

"He's alive," I told her as I walked in. Night Rose directed me to her bed and helped me lay him down. "He's just malnourished. I'll get fluids into him, and he'll be fine."

I trotted over to the chem set and used what little we had to mix a syringe full of vitamins and proteins. It immediately went into the colt. All we could do now was wait for him to wake up. Winter never left his side. None of us spoke. The clock read midnight before the colt stirred. His eyes slowly opened, and came to rest on his mother.

"Mommy," he said, questioningly. "Are you better now?"

"Yes, Tiller," Winter replied, tears in her eyes. "We're both better."

Little Tiller smiled at his mother, and fell back to sleep. Winter looked up at me and Night Rose and could only sob happily, thanking us with her eyes. I just nodded and smiled, as did Night Rose. No pony needed to say anything else.

Footnote: Level Up!

New Perk: Chemist – Through study and training, trial and error, your concoctions have surpassed even Fluttershy's standards. Your chems last twice as long as normal.

Ch 04: Titles
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Fallout Equestria: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Ch 04: Titles

FoE: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Chapter IV: Titles
"I wish they wouldn't call me that." – Littlepip, Fallout: Equestria (main story)

System Report: 0000000004
Unit Status: Active
Location: Fillydelphia
(Satellite Signal Error, Attempting To Repair… Partial Success, Uplink Achieved, Awaiting Return Signal)
Begin data dump to external off-site memory back-up:

- - - - - Done.
Preparing visual report: Done.
Date: --/--/2212, 200PA (Post-Apocalypse)
Time: 0923 Local

Cute.

That's the only way to describe watching Winter Frost with her foal, Tiller. Any other term, no matter how well meaning, would sound cheap and hollow. Therefore, a single word will suffice.

Tiller had woken up hours after midnight, hungry as a dragon. Breakfast was a box of Sugar Bombs and some Ever-Fresh Milk ™, milk guaranteed to "never spoil or triple your bits back!" Or at least that was the claim, proudly displayed on the bottle. The colt was skeptical, but had never tried milk before, so he hesitantly took a bite of the milk-saturated cereal. Two chews later, and he was face down in the bowl, eating his way to the bottom as if treasure awaited him.

"That was great," he exclaimed, licking his lips clean. "Is there any more?" The colt went through two more bowls before he was finished. His mother was the deciding factor in that, scolding him for not sharing with their hosts.

"It's no problem," Night Rose told her with a dismissive hoof-wave. "I have plenty here."

"And what about you, gentle-stallion," Winter said as she turned to me. "Aren't you going to eat?"

"I'm not hungry." It wasn't a lie. I didn't eat, but she didn't need to know that. Winter shrugged and turned her attention back to Tiller.

"What are you guys gonna do now," Night Rose asked.

"Well, we were heading for New Appleoosa," Winter replied. "I guess we'll just keep going."

"That sounds like a good idea," I said. Appleoosa was a well-developed country town, from what my records said. But again, that was a few hundred years old. If there was a New Appleoosa, the old one must've been destroyed. I made a note to ask Night Rose about it later.

"I'd offer to give you an escort there," Night Rose was saying. "But I'm kind of in the middle of tracking a Reaper."

"I don't think he's still around, Night Rose," I said. My scanning yesterday hadn't picked him up at all.

"How do you know," she asked, giving me a look. I simply stared back at her, giving a "duh, android, remember?" look. "Oh. Well. I guess, I'm free then."

"Really? You don't mind?" Winter was smiling so wide I thought her face would break. The adventure had shaken her confidence to protect her foal alone.

"Of course not," Night Rose replied. "I'd be glad to."

"Thank you," Winter said behind tear-filled eyes. "Both of you!"

"No need for tears..."

"I can't help it! I'm so happy!"

"Momma," Tiller said, looking up at his mom. "Please don't cry!"

Two hours later, Night Rose was fitting a set of saddlebags on my back. I grunted as she pulled the straps tightly. She then loaded them down with supplies that we'd need for the trip. Food, ammo, grenades, Med-X's, RAD-Aways, anything she thought we'd need on the road. It was to be a good two week walk.

"Listen," Night Rose said to me as she tightened the last strap. "I'm sorry about yesterday. Guess you were right about saving her. Winter, I mean."

"Don't worry about it," I replied. "I could have just as easily been wrong."

"But you weren't." She stepped back and looked away, ashamed. "I wanted to put a bullet through her head and forget about it. But if we had, then we'd have killed two innocents; her and Tiller. I never thought that raiders would have family, but now I am. And I'm wondering how many orphans I've made in my raider hunting. How bad a pony am I?"

I looked down at her, unsure what to say. Logically, there was no way for her to know, but if I said that it would seem cold. Robotic. That was the last thing I wanted. Instead, I just put a hoof around her metal-clad shoulder and pulled her into what I hope was a comforting hug. She looked up at me and smiled weakly.

"You're not a bad pony," I finally said. "With the others, it was either them or you. Just think about it that way. Any other way will just give you a headache and a lot of sadness."

"Thanks," she replied, then straightened herself out. "So you're sure Snake Skin isn't out there anymore?"

"I scanned the whole crater and didn't spot him," I replied. "If he still is here, he's in a deep hole."

"Not deep enough," Night Rose muttered as Winter Frost and Tiller emerged. Night Rose closed and sealed the door behind them, then turned to me. "So, are we ready?" I nodded and began to trot down the road, scanners searching all around. Not finding anything, I looked back to make sure everypony was following me. Tiller was missing.

"Where's the colt?"

Night Rose pointed at my side. I looked down and gasped. (I can be startled now. These emotions are gonna be the death of me.) Tiller was trotting next to me. Well, more galloping to keep up with my pace.

"Gah! Make some noise, will ya?"

"Sorry (huff) I just wanted (huff huff) to run (huff huff) with you! (huff huff)"

"You shouldn't be running at all, I said, leaning down to pick him up. He slid down my neck to rest against the saddlebags, breathing heavily.

"Is he alright," Winter asked, coming up next to me.

"Just out of breath," I replied.

"I'll be fine mommy," Tiller said between breaths.

"Tough little guy," Night Rose said as she joined us. "He took right off after you."

"Mommy says you don't have a name! Is that true?"

"Well, yeah," I replied. "I was born without one."

"So what do we call you then?"

I still hadn't decided on a moniker for myself. So, I improvised. I sent out a signal burst to the same node I'd used the day before, and queried a list of names of ponies that'd worked in that branch of the MoWT. It returned quite a long list of names. I scanned the stack and found one that seemed to match my type. The stallion attached to the name was a large draft pony, and had been used to move the more wounded patients from surgery to their assigned rooms. He'd also volunteered for testing of enhancement drugs. He had the same gray coat as me, but his hair had been brown. His eyes were also golden like mine. A nanosecond later (data moves REALLY fast, doesn't it?) I had my answer. A bullet kept me from informing them, though. With a clang, it bounced off of Night Rose's armor. Everypony dove for cover, Night Rose taking Winter with her while I protected Tiller.

"Did I get you, bitch," a raspy voice called. "I really hope not! I'm not done having fun yet!"

Night Rose and I looked at each other, her with a look of annoyance and me one of apology. "Ok so I didn't search in this direction," I told her. "So sue me."

"Only if we live," she replied as she donned her helmet. She then popped above cover and took a shot.

I looked down at Tiller. He had a scared look, but was also curious, as if he was on some new roller coaster. His mother, on the other hoof, was frightened beyond measure for him. She hadn't taken her eyes off her foal from the moment she'd landed behind cover. Several rounds from what sounded like a buzz saw hit above her head and she winced, but didn't look away.

"Tiller, get ready to run to your mom," I said as I engaged my zebra rifle. "Go when I start shooting. Use that pothole as cover if anything hits in front of you. Don't think, just dive in. It's safe." I leapt up and fired off my entire clip as I yelled for him to go.

The Reaper had taken refuge in a half destroyed house, and was using the windows for cover. Why hadn't my E.F.S. spotted him? And how did he avoid my radar? Questions later, shooting now. All of my rounds were accurate enough to make him duck as the colt crossed the road to his mom, and they both retreated to better cover behind us.

Night Rose used my covering fire to advance her position as well, taking cover behind a fallen pillar. It looked to be from a long gone overhead rail system. The train it once carried was wrecked a bit beyond us, fallen from the rails onto the street ahead. She was making for that; it lay halfway between us and Snake's position. The ground around her was suddenly raked with bullets, forcing her to veer off. The Reaper had gone to a different window and opened up with a full sized chain gun. Good thing he had shitty aim.

Now it was my turn to advance, but there wasn't much cover that could accommodate somepony my size. I used what I could, and ended up lying flat behind a low wall as he turned the weapon on me.

"Hahaha," he laughed. "Come on, is that all you guys got?"

"I'll give him something," I heard Night Rose growl as she fired on his cover. The wall he hid behind was made of some of the best material of the time. I briefly wondered what the building had been, when a grenade bounced off the top of my wall and landed next to me. I gave it a hard buck and sent it through a window, where it exploded inside the collapsed house behind me.

Something felt wrong about this. It was like he wanted us to get closer. I activated my E.F.S.'s addon selector. Not all E.F.S. interfaces had come with this feature. The records showed it was a military-only option. I'd plumb the ramifications of that discovery later. Quickly I searched for and found Metal Detector, then sent a pulse through my wall towards the Reaper's hiding spot. The picture that the return painted confirmed my suspicions. I tapped into Night Rose's helmet radio, knowing she would want to charge ahead.

"Night Rose," I said, hoping she'd recognize me. "He's planted mines all around those windows. Don't advance any further."

"So how do we deal with him, then," she replied, still shooting when she could.

"The next time he throws a grenade at me, I'm gonna try and bounce it back over the wall into one of the mines. The explosion might catch the others, and cause fratricide."

"That's your plan? Blow them up with a grenade?"

"You got a better one?"

Her reply was to pop up and shoot at the ground around the window. Unloading her entire energy pack, she finally caught one, flipping it up and onto another mine. The explosion of the two, dislodged a ring of mines around it, throwing them into the field where they detonated and set off the others. A chain of explosions tore through the air. I watched from cover as several mines were blasted into the windows above. My enhanced hearing focused on the inside of that room.

Beep. Beep. Beep. "Oh SHI-!" Boom, boom, boom, boom.

When the explosions ceased, I stood and surveyed the area. The yard was covered in small craters and blast marks. The wall had been blown outward, chunks having sailed several yards away. The Reaper, or rather what was left of him, was laying against the far wall, not moving. I put away my rifle as Night Rose stepped up beside me. "Your way was good, mine was better. The difference? Speed."

"And you say I don't do things halfway?"

She stepped into the destroyed building while I went back to find Winter and Tiller. Both had taken refuge behind a fallen refrigerator. Good piece of cover, judging from all the bullet holes in the wall behind them.

"Is everypony alright?"

"We're fine," Winter replied, with Tiller adding, "That was so cool!"

I smiled at the colt and lead them back outside. I heard a single shot ring across the street, and saw Night Rose emerge a moment later. I nodded to her, then turned my head to check my bags. Fortunately, I hadn't taken a round anywhere, but a few of the food stuffs were crushed from when I'd landed on them.

"Note to self, take bags off, THEN start fighting." Tiller giggled, but no one else said everything. They were just glad they were alive.

"Justice is served," Night Rose said as she joined us. "Let's move on."

"Miss Night Rose," Winter said hesitantly. "Will you be alright?"

"I'm fine," Night Rose replied. "I'm glad this hunt's done." She nodded to me, then started walking down the road again.

Winter watched her walk for a bit, then looked at me. "She's ok, right?"

"She'll be fine." I hoped I was right as I scooped up Tiller again, depositing him safely on my back before walking after Night Rose, Winter trailing behind.

"Hey, metal butt," Night rose called back to me. "You never did say what to call you."

I chuckled to myself. Amazing what you forget in the heat of battle.

"Call me Versatile."

Footnote: Level Up!

New Perk: Commando – You've become lethal with your rifle. Your accuracy with rifles using S.A.T.S. is +25%!

Ch 05: Destination Nowhere
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Fallout Equestria: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Ch 05: Destination Nowhere

FoE: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Chapter V: Destination Nowhere
"It is a barren wasteland, riddled with fire and ash and dust .The very air you breathe is a poison." – Boromir, LotR: FotR

System Report: 0000000005
Unit Status: Active
Location: unknown road (approx. 98 mi. south-southeast of Fillydelphia)
(Satellite Signal Status: Uplink established, searching for functioning relay)
Begin data dump to external off-site memory back-up:

- - - - - Done.
Preparing visual report: Done.

Date: --/--/2212, 200PA (+6 days activation)
Time: 1830 Local

Boredom.

When I was told that it would be two weeks trotting from Fillydelphia to New Appleoosa, I thought it would have been an eventful two weeks. I thought we'd be running into trouble every other hour, either from raiders, mutants, or more Reapers. The sad fact was we hadn't run into anything bigger than a radroach. I was partly happy/partly sad about that, but I constantly reminded myself we were only four days into our trip.

Night Rose trotted ahead of Winter Frost and her foal, Tiller. It was her turn on point. I had rear guard duty, scanners working at maximum. I still hadn't figured out how that Snake Skin pony had evaded both scanner AND E.F.S., and it was gnawing at my logic circuits. Over the past three days, I'd pondered it in a sub-routine at the back of my mind, and had come up with no real acceptable answer. The idea of a Stealthbuck had crossed my mind, but my E.F.S. was finely tuned enough to detect such a ruse. I'd also ruled out a malfunction in my system. A full diagnostic (which took about four hours earlier today) confirmed I was green across the board. I was completely perplexed and about to give up when a stumper thought hit me as I checked our surroundings visually. How had Night Rose been able to track him for as long as she had? She'd told me she'd followed him from Hoofington, or "the Hoof" as she'd put it, for a week before pinning him down to Filly, but she'd never said how. This question needed an answer. And quickly.

I looked up at her past Winter, and was glad to see she had her helmet on. I tapped into her suit system via her comms, and sent her a burst message in text. I didn't want to look like I was talking to myself, and as much as I trusted Winter and Tiller, I didn't think they needed to know I'd been fooled like that.

On her E.F.S. I displayed a message: So I noticed I couldn't track that Reaper guy the other day when he jumped us.

"You couldn't," she replied, her voice clear in my head but not in my ears. I was glad she caught on that I wanted this private, and had turned off her external speaker. "That's a surprise to me."

Vocal analysis told me it was a lie. She had known I hadn't seen him. I messaged back: Try again. You knew I couldn't. Could you?

"I don't know what you're talking about."

Please don't try to lie to me. I have programs that can tell.

"What do you want me to say, Versatile? I don't know why you couldn't see him."

But you could. I did a replay this morning. You were looking right at him when the shot hit you.

"How do you-"

Android, remember?

"Fine, so you saw," she replied, angrily. "What's your point?"

Why didn't you warn us?

"He wasn't aiming at you," she said as if it explained everything.

So? You could have warned us… You WANTED him to shoot you?

"You want to stop talking about this now," she said coldly. I knew I was encroaching on dangerous territory, but I was angry that she'd taken that kind of risk.

Why? What reason would justify you taking a bullet?

"Leave it alone, Vers," she cautioned, anger creeping into her voice. "I have my reasons."

I can't accept that, I replied. What if he hadn't been aiming at you? What if it was Winter he shot at? Or Tiller?

She suddenly whirled on her hooves and stomped up to me, getting nose to nose despite our height difference. My ears flicked back as her scream filled my head. "BECAUSE I WANTED HIM TO KILL ME! Happy now?? Does that satisfy your curiosity program?? I! Want! To! Die! You get it??"

I was stunned, my body paralyzed as her gaze bored through her visor straight into my eyes. It took an entire thirty seconds to process what she said. In that time she turned away and resumed the walk down the road. Winter looked just as surprised.

"What was that about?"

I realized she hadn't heard any of the conversation, and didn't know how to respond. Night Rose saved me again with her reply.

"Nothing," she said, not turning to look back at us. "Just had to do that for some reason. Let's make camp on that hill."

Night fell over the wasteland. Winter and Tiller ate dinner and bedded down quickly, both falling asleep within minutes. I was on guard duty again (not having to sleep had advantages and disadvantages). Night Rose sat with her back to me, staring into the fire we'd made to keep warm. Her armor lay in a pile next to her.

We stayed like that for hours. I didn't want to anger her again, so I resolved to wait till she spoke to me. Sadly, she wasn't in the mood. She lay down and went to sleep sometime before midnight, back still to me. Damnit, I thought. Once again, I've pissed her off. Next time she says leave it, Versatile, fucking leave it.

I stayed up the rest of the night, on alert for anything predatory. The worst that came calling was a bloatsprite. I dispatched it well out of smelling range of my companions (those things smelled horrible when burned to a crisp). As I resumed my vigil, my mind began to wander into a place I didn't know I had. The conscious world fell away before I had a chance to stop it.

oOoOoOo

I was on some sort of table. Wires came out of my body from everywhere. I looked back and saw I had no cover plates, and my superstructure was incomplete; I was missing my entire back half. Strangely, I wasn't disturbed by this. It was almost as if there was two of me in my head. I could feel myself doing a diagnostic.

"He's online now," I heard somepony say. My head turned and focused on a blue unicorn I didn't recognize. An orange earth pony stepped up beside her and looked into my eyes.

"Is there any way we can dim them eye receptors? He looks like a giant pony-shaped flashlight," Applejack asked someone behind me. The glare reflected in their eyes dimmed a bit, and Applejack smiled. "Hey there, partner. Ya doin' okay?"

"Unit is functional," I heard myself say in a monotone, electronic voice. "Unit is forty-seven percent complete, according to diagnostic analysis. Unit awaits command."

"Well, shoot," Applejack said. "We gotta do somethin' about that there voice ya got. Yer soundin' too mechanical. Run vocal program thirty-two-bee."

"Complying," I replied, then my voice turned deep, with a southern accent. "Program a-runnin, boss."

"Oh, Celestia," the unicorn said, stifling a laugh with her hoof. "That sounds worse than you, AJ."

"Can't have that," AJ agreed. "End previous program, and run vocal program fifteen-dee."

"Program running," I replied with a slightly feminine giggle at the end. "I can't believe you actually tried this, Applejack." Where the hay had that come from?

"Ugh," AJ said to no pony in particular. "Typical Pinkie Pie. End program. Let's try runnin' one at random."

"Stand by," my electronic voice said as a randomizer sub-routine selected a new voice. My next words came out in the voice I recognized as my normal voice. "Program two-two-seven-eff online. Is this acceptable?"

"Sounds perfect to me," the unicorn said, turning to AJ for approval. AJ nodded in agreement.

"Yup, we found a winner," she said. "Save to default voice setting. Moonshine, we're gonna need ta cut off his logic circuits fer this next part of the programmin'."

The unicorn, now tagged as Moonshine, nodded and turned to me again, her horn glowing. "Nighty-nite, big guy. We should really think of naming you something…"

oOoOoOo

The real world came back to me in a burst, and I physically jumped, my hoof thrusters flaring briefly. I looked around, startled. Everything was fine, it seemed. Winter and Tiller were still sleeping peacefully, but Night Rose appeared to be having a nightmare, groaning and kicking in her sleep.

"Get off," she was saying, apparently in a fight for her life. "No… Get away with that…"

I walked over and lay down next to her, giving her a small nuzzle. She seemed to settle then, and I returned my attention to the area around us, my mind going back to the memory I'd uncovered. Clearly, it was something from the days of my construction. I'd recognized Applejack right off, the part of me that knew it was a dream remembered her. But the other pony, Moonshine… Somehow, she was important to me, but how? I couldn't process it. She seemed like she was… special. I briefly registered something within my emotion circuit. It was a deep hollow feeling, as if something was missing, and it made me sad. I didn't understand at the time, but I hoped the answer would come soon.

"Target, forty-five degrees left," I called to Night Rose as I ducked back down under cover again, my shotgun having ended a suicide charge from a raider pony.

"I see him," she yelled back. She didn't need to; we were linked by her comms again. The heat of battle really gets your fluids moving.

It was midafternoon on the fifth day of our trip, and we'd accidentally come across another raider nest. Night Rose had opted to scavenge a building not far off our path while I watched Winter and Tiller. We'd been in the middle of a game Tiller was teaching me called Hooves Up (he'd invented it himself), when Night Rose came barreling out of the door she'd entered earlier, shots pinging off her armor from the doorway. Things escalated from there.

Night Rose took aim with her suit's built-in S.A.T.S. and took the top of his mane down a few inches as he barely made it to cover, her laser leaving a smoking part in it. I pulled a grenade from my saddlebag and armed it. With a three count, I tossed it through a broken window. It quickly came back out and exploded harmlessly outside. These raiders weren't stupid. At least, most of them weren't.

Another raider charged through the doorway and ran straight for Winter and Tiller's hiding spot, shooting wildly. S.A.T.S. was charged, and I aimed in front of him, putting two rounds through his front legs and dropping him cold. Night Rose's shot settled him into death's embrace.

"Whose bright idea was this anyway," she called. "Whoever it was deserves to be shot."

I nearly chuckled when she said that, then I remembered the day before. The comment was quickly labeled as not funny, and I went back to putting solid slugs into the building's wall and windows. The place was made of simple wood siding, and appeared to have been painted a very gaudy orange. Something inside me cringed every time I looked at it.

A grenade landed just behind me, and I rapidly bucked it far away, then jumped up and put shots into the windows. I caught one of the raiders full in the face, his head exploding from the impact of the .22 slug going from his muzzle to his brainstem to the wall behind him. He was down before the grenade had gone off.

"There's too many of them," I said to Night Rose as I dropped back down for what seemed like the hundredth time. "We need to retreat."

"No," she replied. "They all go down." There was a strange finality in her voice, one that broached no argument.

"Fine," I yelled as I leapt from cover, popped out my Mini egg launcher, and put a round in both windows. I dropped to the ground as the shockwave hit me, my hooves barely finding purchase on the ground as my main and tail were blown wildly behind me. Night Rose had been partly above cover, and was tossed onto her back. The double explosion took out most of the bottom floor, part of the second floor, and the face of the building for both floors, as well as part of the third floor. Fortunately, the supports were made of tougher material, and the building stayed upright. The raider, however, weren't as fortunate. Two that had been caught outside went flying past me, landing in a heap ten yards back. Another had been blown out a side window, his back breaking upon exiting. The rest were either vaporized in the initial blast or pulped from the shockwave forcing them through walls and closed doors.

"That down enough," I asked, weakly. Night Rose just turned her head to look at me. I could feel the glare.

I looked back to where Winter and Tiller were hidden. Both still had their hooves on their ears, faces scrunched tightly. I made a note to find them some protective gear soon, definitely something with ear guards.

Night Rose was getting to her hooves as I stood up, putting the launcher away. She looked at the building, then at me.

"You enjoy that far too much," she told me over the comm channel. I detected irritation and a distinct hint of mirth in her voice. Looked like I wasn't the only one with a fondness for big booms. I smiled, glad she was back to her normal self again. I still wanted to apologize about last night. I owed her at least that, even if she owed me an explanation.

While the raiders hadn't survived the blast, their weapons had. Night Rose went in to loot the bodies and what was left of the building as I checked on the two that had been blown clear. Neither was in a condition to talk. Only one had survived, the other having died on impact. The lone survivor wasn't long for the world either. His vitals told me his insides were mush, and he had a very unhealthy dose of radiation from the blast. He looked up at me, but could only gurgle. Blood came out of his mouth, ears and nose.

I brought a hoof to his neck, then looked back at Winter. She nodded to me and turned Tiller away, guiding him around a fallen wall. This was nothing a young foal needed to see. I looked back down at the raider. His eye was closed, as if he knew I would end his suffering. With a strong push and a twist, I did just that.

"I'm sorry," I said to the corpse. "It was you or my friends. You'd have done the same I hope." I then went through his barding. He had very little on him. A few shotgun rounds and some bottle caps. I wasn't sure the purpose of the latter, but I took them anyway. They were important enough for him to keep, so maybe they were useful elsewhere.

I looked back to where Night Rose was scavenging. She was holding up a raiders pistol, and seemed to be talking to herself. I tuned in with my enhanced hearing (have I mentioned how useful that feature has been?), curious to what she was saying.

"Oh, you're a pretty thing," she said. "You're coming with me now. Let's see if we can find some ammo to go along with you, hmm?"

Medical records I'd downloaded days back had notes about ponies that talked to themselves or to inanimate objects. They labeled such ponies as "in need of psychiatric assistance." What I saw was somepony coping with the situation she found herself in. The whole wasteland seemed to be a bad situation. Unless she ended up being a danger to herself, or worse, others, I saw nothing wrong with talking to her weapon. Some military records I'd picked up had footnotes about soldiers naming their weapons and treating them as loved ones.

I stopped listening to her and trotted over to Winter. She was telling Tiller that what we'd done wasn't supposed to be cool or fun. She saw me coming and brought me into the conversation.

"Would you please tell my son that this was in no way supposed to be a good experience?"

"Tiller," I said, looking down at the foal. "What we did here today is not something to be proud of. We did what we had to because, if they had the chance, they would have killed us all. This was definitely not something to be admired."

"Okay," he said, looking a little dejected. "But the explosions at the end were pretty cool."

"Be that as it may, I want you to promise to never go looking for a fight. Understood?"
"Yes, Versatile. I promise."

I nodded to Winter, then turned to check on Night Rose again. She was trotting back to me with her helmet off, several weapons strapped to her back that she hadn't had before. My eyes widened in surprise. "How the hell did you get that many so fast?"

"What can I say," she replied. "I'm good at scrounging." She sat down next to me and Winter and laid out her haul before us. "Let's see. Two shotguns, a neat pistol, an assault rifle that doesn't work (too bad about that), some lever-action rifles…" She continued to take inventory as I analyzed everything she had, a program scanning each weapon inside and out. Most of it wasn't usable, except for parts. The pistol (the same one she'd fawned over earlier) was small and looked like it could easily be hidden in a boot or in a mane holster. From its dimensions, it fired rifle rounds. Damn! My scanners labeled it simply, "That Gun." I cocked my head to the side, confused. Night Rose looked at me. "What?"

"That pistol is a beast," I replied. "Looks like it uses .762 ammo."

"I know, right," she said ecstatically. "I was thinking we'd give it to Winter."

"Oh no," the ice blue mare said, backing away. "I'm not carrying any kind of weapon."

"Come on," Night Rose said. "You handled a rifle like a pro. What's wrong with having this?"

"No weapons. Period. You two can have all you want, but I'm not going to hold one around Tiller. I won't be a bad example to him."

"Winter," I said, "you might need it, in case something gets by the two of us. Remote chance, I know, but the risk to Tiller is still there." Dirty pool, bringing in her kid, and I knew it, but it was true. "Take it at least for defense. I promise you don't have to use it until necessary. Besides, how is it a bad example to want to protect your loved ones?"

Winter looked at me, then at Night Rose. Then at Tiller, who looked back at his mother innocently. I think I saw her heart break, and then she picked up the pistol. With what seemed to be expert practice, she took some rounds, loaded the small clip, jacked back the action and clicked on the safety. She then tucked it into her saddlebag. Both Night Rose and I looked at her in wonder.

"Wow," Tiller said. "That was super cool, mom!"

"No, it wasn't," her mom replied, putting a few more rounds in her bag. She then turned and walked back toward the road. We watched her walk away, and I had a distinct feeling of "What The Hell." A glance at Night Rose told me she had the same feeling.

As I'd assumed, the rest of the loot was junk. I had parts for my shotgun, and we had ammo to replace what we'd spent, but the net profit minus That Gun was zero. Neither of the rifles was savable. We returned to the road and resumed our journey.

We made camp that night in an intact building. I went in first, making sure it was empty of hostiles, then let the others in. Surprisingly, the building had a small generator in the basement, and with a button push and a good buck, we had power for the evening.

A thorough search found medical supplies, edible food (Winter was wary of it until Night Rose took a bite, and that was only after I'd confirmed it was safe), and a little more ammo.

Every pony was downstairs, making themself comfortable for the night. I was wandering around upstairs. Nosing my way into a side room found me with a working terminal. I plugged in and made my way through the files it contained. The security was painfully easy to get through.

Apparently, the building had been a Ministry of Morale music distribution hub, sending digital media out to radio stations across Equestria. I downloaded several intact song files, from country western tunes to hard bass electronica. There was even a few labeled as "rap" genre. I activated one file as I continued through the other files. The song started small, but grew into a sad melody. The author of the song was somepony named Octavia, and featured a Lyra, whoever they were.

It was mainly a string-based song, but other sounds joined it quickly. Soon an entire orchestra joined in, and a proud sound came across, as if the song was made for a ruler as they strode among their people. It didn't end there, though. It suddenly dropped into a darker tone, giving me a feeling of sadness and loneliness, but also a feeling of resentment.

By this point in the song, I'd completely pulled out of the terminal, its files safely stored in my memory. I was too lost in the music to go through them. It had captivated me.

When I thought I could take no more bitterness, the proud sound of horns tried to intrude. The dark fought back, and it seemed a battle had begun. I wasn't sure what had happened, but I knew that proud side had won, conquering the bitter and anger. The song, however, didn't see it that way. Where I expected the proud to return, I only got a regretful feeling. As if a great wrong had been committed in winning the fight. The song ended in sorrow and remorse.

As the track stopped playing, I felt myself return to the moment. I hadn't moved in fifteen minutes, I realized. I quickly looked around, and found little Tiller staring at me. I had to shake myself, to register his voice correctly.

"Are you okay," he was asking, his fore hooves propped up against mine as he tried to get closer to me. I blinked several times, my eyes feeling strange. I reached up with my other hoof and wiped at them. My leg came away wet. I blinked again, and looked down at the foal, his face full of concern. My eyes became misty again as I looked at him, and I had to wipe them a second time.

I looked down at him again and smiled. "I'm alright, Tiller. I just found something that kind of got to me."

"What was it," he asked, bringing his hooves back to the floor.

"Just a piece of music," I replied. "It's not important. What'cha need?"

"My mom and miss Rose were worried because it got so quiet up here. We couldn't hear you moving around, so I told them I'd come find you."

"Well, thanks," I told him. I wiped my eyes one more time (damn, tears were annoying) then nosed him toward the door. "Go on back down. I'll be there in a bit. I promise."

"Do you Pinkie Pie Swear?"

"Where did you learn about that," I asked, the term coming up immediately in my embedded memory.

"My mom said there used to be a pony who made a special phrase, and when she said it, she would always do what she promised."

"Alright then," I said as I sat down in front of him and went through the ritual. "Cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye, I promise I'll come down soon. Okay?"

"Okay," Tiller replied happily, and trotted out the door. I listened as he went down the stairs and reported dutifully to his mom. I returned to my searching, replaying the song for myself. Songs like these were made for a reason, and I had a feeling there was a story behind this.

Footnote: Level Up!

New Perk: Child At Heart – You've learned a thing or two about how to talk to people. This perk greatly improves how you talk to children, some adults, and even robots (if they don't shoot you first.)

Ch 06: To Soothe The Savage Beast
View Online

Fallout Equestria: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Ch 06: To Soothe The Savage Beast

FoE: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Chapter VI: To Soothe The Savage Beast

"It's been a long time coming/But you got the message now/Cause I was never going/Yeah you're the one that's going down!" – Sick Puppies, You're Going Down

System Report: 0000000006
Unit Status: Active
Location: unknown road (approx. 98 mi. south-southeast of Fillydelphia)
(Satellite Signal Status: Relay contacted. Attempting handshake protocol. Please stand by…)
Begin data dump to external off-site memory back-up:

- - - - - Done.
Preparing visual report: Done.

Date: --/--/2212, 200PA (+9 days activation)
Time: 1007 Local

Scanning.

The files flew across my vision, faster than anypony could possibly read. I'm sure if anypony else even saw what I was looking at, they'd only see it as a big blur of text, with a word made out here and there. Maybe. But my mind had sped up its clockspeed, and I was reading everything at a lightning pace.

The terminal I'd found earlier had a great wealth of information, a lot of it post-bombing history. The MoM Media Relay hub we were currently spending the night in had remained active for years after Equestria went dark. Several staff members had brought their families here to hide when the bombs fell, quite a few from Fillydelphia. Unfortunately, they were still in range of the radiation and fallout from the detonation that had taken the city out. Sure they'd survived the blast, but had suffered radiation sickness for years afterward. Not the way I thought any creature should die. But throughout it all, they kept transmitting music and other media to radio stations they didn't know were shut down or destroyed. I had to admire their dedication.

The most interesting thing I'd found, though, was that I was right. That Octavia/Lyra song did in fact have a story behind it. There was a video clip meant to be played along with the audio. It was mainly still images, but when sync'd with the song, told the story of the Royal Pony Sister's Battle for the Sky. I memorized every picture (not that I had to) and began to form the story by combining images with historical documentation also found in the files. It might be a good tale to tell Tiller if I could find a moral he could understand.

The rest of the files were a mix of playlist instructions for various stations and reports back to Canterlot for this hub. These I trashed; they were useless now. Satisfied I'd absorbed what I could, I resumed normal clockspeed, and dropped back into a conversation between Night Rose and Tiller.

"And what do you want to do when you're older?"

"I want to be a brave protector of New Appleoosa!"

"I told him one sheriff story from years long past," Winter Frost said, "and suddenly he wants to be a cowpony."

"Well at least he doesn't want to run away and join a traveling circus."

"Those still exist," I asked.

"Hey," Night Rose exclaimed. "Guess who's back with us!"

"Sorry," I replied sheepishly. "I guess I zoned out, huh?"

"Kinda," Tiller said.

"But in response to your question," Winter said, turning to look at me, "yes, Circuses still exist. Although they're mostly made up of traders that have banded together around a few entertainers, so if you go to a show, you get hounded to buy something. Most of the stuff they hock isn't worth the bottle caps they want, and they really hate haggling."

Thus I learned that bottle caps were currency. Glad I discovered that before we hit a major city. "I see."

"Anyway," Night Rose said with a yawn, "I think it's time we went to bed."

"The doors are secure and the windows are sealed," Winter said, looking around. "We should be fine."

"I'm sacking out. G'nite everypony." With that Night Rose flopped her head down and passed out quickly. Tiller trotted over and curled up next to me and followed Night Rose's lead. I looked down at him and smiled. Damn, he was cute.

"He really likes you," Winter said.

"Yeah, I know," I replied.

Silence descended for a few minutes, then Winter spoke again.

"You're a robot, aren't you?"

I was stunned. Not surprised; she'd seen me pull weapons out of my body, and had to have noticed the glow my eyes gave off. Her bluntness startled me. I gulped but didn't look away.

"What makes you say that," I asked.

"I'm not a Stable pony," she said. "I've been around the Equestrian Wasteland for a while. Whoever built you did a real good job of making you as Pony-like as possible, but some things you can't hide. For example, your hooves." I looked at them, as she spoke. "They're hollow at the bottom. My guess, thrusters or some hover system. You haven't eaten anything this entire trip; I've been watching our supplies. And your mane and tail. Too shiny to be natural, as well as the strange color pattern. Connection wires?"

I nodded, too embarrassed to say anything else. She'd nailed every bit of me so far.

"Listen," she continued. "You saved my life. You saved my foal. You've protected us since day one. And as I said, Tiller likes you a lot. Does, Night Rose know?" I nodded again. "Good. Then only Tiller is in the dark. I'd like to keep it that way. He thinks you're just a cyborg pony. I'll continue to let him think so. But if you ever show a sign of going rogue, I will end you, no matter what you're made of." There was a certainty and a fire in her eyes. I had no choice but to take her seriously. She looked me over one last time, her dark purple eyes boring into my golden receptors, before laying her own head down and slipping into unconsciousness.

I breathed a sigh of relief. At least I didn't have to tiptoe around her anymore. And even if Tiller did find out, he'd probably say that made me twenty percent cooler, or something. The kid seemed to know quite a few old time phrases. We'd talked about them after I'd returned from my search upstairs.

I sighed and lay my head down, curling my body around the colt, who nuzzled into me in his sleep. I smiled and closed my eyes, The building was secure, so I decided to try the whole "sleep" thing again. Non-essential functions shut down, and my clockspeed seemed to slow down, but picked right back up. I'd detected a howl in the night.

Instantly I was fully awake, my head coming up to look around. No pony else had heard it. Whatever it was had been on the very edge of my hearing range. Radar was clear, as was my E.F.S. I tracked the sound to be coming from the south somewhere, possibly close to our route. We'd have to be even more wary tomorrow. I laid my head back down around Tiller, but didn't try to sleep again. I'd made yet another discovery tonight.

Strange noises freaked me out.

Morning brought with it… well, nothing really except for ponies waking up. Breakfast was passed out, and I stepped outside to do a quick reconnoiter of the surrounding area. I hadn't detected anything coming to visit, but I'd been fooled before. I didn't want to take any chances. And I still needed to talk to Night Rose about that.

I found nothing in the immediate area, and a small colony of giant fire ants in the distance. Fortunately it wasn't in the direction we were heading, and they seemed content to leave us alone.

I was joined by Night Rose shortly after. Her mane was mussed and tangled. I don't think she ever brushed it, but I couldn't blame her. It wasn't like the wasteland gave her points for looking spiffy.

"I'm sorry," I said after a few minutes. "I didn't mean to get you mad yesterday."

"I know."

"You really want to die?"

"Yup."

"Why?"

"Nope."

I sighed and looked at her. "Are you ever gonna tell me?"

"Maybe."

"Are you gonna give me anything more than short answers this morning?"

"Nope." She turned and walked back into the building.

Yup. Still mad at me.

She re-emerged shortly after in full armor minus helmet. Winter and Tiller stepped out behind her. The colt immediately ran up to me and, in one unbelievable leap, was on my back. "Giddy-up," he yelled, kicking his hooves into my side. I laughed and took off down the road, making a good speed but not so fast that he was going to fall off. I turned my ears and heard the two mares break into a gallop to keep up.

We made good time until afternoon. I'd slowed a few hours earlier to a brisk canter, knowing the girls couldn't keep the pace I could. Now, though, we were nearing the area where I'd guessed the howl had come from. I slowed to a trot as we came to a dead forest, my ears constantly swiveling, eyes scanning every piece of brush and dead tree. The road didn't lead into it, but it came close enough for an ambush.

"What's up," Night Rose asked as she donned her helmet. Winter had also picked up my sudden mood swing, and had That Gun in her mouth, tongue on the trigger. She may not like guns, but she'd fight to the death for her foal. For my part, I brought out the Zebra rifle and held it at the ready.

"Nothing, for now," I replied as Night Rose brought her energy rifle to the ready position. I could feel Tiller shiver on my back. He knew we were on edge, and was nervous because of it. I didn't look back at him, but I could bet he was trying to be brave. "Tiller," I said as I gazed around. "If shooting starts, get underneath me, and make yourself as small as you can."

"Okay," he said. He was definitely trying to be brave, but his voice trembled.

"Seriously," Night Rose said. "What's going on?"

"I heard something last night that came from around here," I told her. "It didn't sound like it wanted to sit down to tea. I'm just being cautious."

"Good idea," Winter said around her pistol, somehow understandable despite the weapon in her mouth. "This is wolven territory. They'd been spared direct attacks in the war, but over the years they've migrated further and further into Equestria."

"And you were going to tell us when," Night Rose asked, looking at the other mare.

"Not the time," I said, cutting off any chance of argument. "Wait till we're clear, then get mad at her."

Night Rose just nodded and took point while Winter fell in behind me. I was carrying Tiller, thus making me middle. Precious cargo always went into the middle of a caravan. We proceeded at trot speed, eyes peeled for anything threatening.

It was several hours before the Wolven made themselves known. We were near the end of the forest when a sharp howl echoed from the grove. It was close. Real close. Tiller leapt to the ground and dove between my legs, just like I'd told him, and curled up there. The girls went for cover behind a crashed vehicle; it seemed to be a troop transport, meant to be puilled by a Pegasus. Tagged as a Sky Bandit, it seemed to be lightly armored. I hoped the wolven weren't heavily armed.

I reached down and nudged Tiller toward his mother, and he hopped up and rand to her side. I then turned my attention to the grove, stepping closer to it slowly.

"Vers," Night Rose called." What the hell are you doing?"

I didn't answer. If these things were going to attack us, I wanted them to hit me first so the girls had a better shot at them. I heard another howl and my body shuddered briefly. Weird noises. I shook off my nervousness and stepped forward again.

The ground in front of me erupted as a wolven burst from the dirt and landed on my back. Instinctively I bucked and leapt, trying to shake it off. To the side, others leapt from earthen hiding places and came at me, teeth gnashing. I spun and bucked them back, then cried out in pain as the one on my back bit into my neck. His teeth met my armored hide beneath the skin and chipped, but he held firm. Behind me, I could hear shots and zaps as Night Rose and Winter took shots at the pack.

I angled the zebra rifle backward and put a burst into the wolven's belly, lighting him on fire as the bullets struck. He yowled and leapt off of me, running wildly into the forest as the fire died on his fur. The rest of the pack, five strong, circled me warily. I glared back at them and fired off another burst. They leapt back but didn't leave. A red laser bean struck one on the flank and he yelped, but didn't run.

"Girls, stop shooting for a minute," I called.

"Are you crazy," Winter yelled back. "They have you surrounded!"

"Notice how they haven't come at me yet," I asked. "Just trust me!"

They looked at each other but stopped shooting. I looked at the biggest wolven. She growled at me with a deep menacing voice. Her fur was light brown, tan on her chest and underside, while her paws were pure white, dirty at the bottom where the fur met her foot pads. If the situation wasn't so dangerous, I'd remark how beautiful she looked. As it was, I could tell she was debating coming at me again.

"Easy, now," I said, putting my rifle away. "No need for a fight."

"What are you," the wolven said, her voice as deep as her growl. "You aren't made of flesh."

"No, I'm not. I'm made of metal beneath the fur."

She looked at me sideways, the one eye narrowing as if examining me for weakness. "Met-al," she repeated, pronouncing the word slowly. "We do not know this word. What means 'met-al?'"

"It's a material, like bone," I explained, trying to put it in a term she'd understand. "Only many times stronger. Not as breakable."

"Vers, what the hay is going on over there?"

"Not now, Night Rose," I shouted back. "Just stay cool."

I heard her grumble something to Winter, but I was too focused on the pack to hear her. The Alpha stepped cautiously closer, sniffing the air as she came. I really hoped neither of my friends would take a shot at this. It would turn real ugly.

She came within a yard of me, and I held out a hoof for her to smell. My memory bank had a file on wolves, and the proper way to greet them. I hope they were close enough for the wolven to recognize the gesture. The she-wolven cautiously extended her neck and sniffed my hoof, then stepped closer and sniffed it more thoroughly.

"Smells of burning," she said. I pulled my hoof back and fired a burst from the thruster embedded there. She jumped back with a yelp, but watched as I turned the flame off again.

"Nothing to worry about," I told her.

"You make fire from your foot?" Her face had a look of amazement and wariness. Apparently, wolven were a non-technological people. The file I was creating on them labeled them as tribal. I was about to answer, but saw her look past me and heard the two wolven behind me turn and growl. I also heard the hoof fall of two earth ponies approaching, one metallic.

"Girls," I said without looking away from the Alpha. "Now is not the time to be shooty."

"Just making sure you're alright," Night Rose replied.

"We need to protect each other," Winter said, speaking to the wolven as much as to me. "Just like the pack protects its own."

"Look," I said, returning my full attention to the Alpha. "I'm sorry I set your pack mate on fire. I hope he's alright."

The Alpha looked at me again. She was more relaxed now, but still on guard. Her eyes went to the ground for a minute. She seemed to be struggling with something internally. It was a hard struggle, as no one said anything for a few minutes.

"Vers," Night Rose said. "We're still cool, right?"

"We're still cool," I replied. The Alpha finally came to a decision, barking an order to her pack. Carefully, they fell into position around her. It seemed that they all were ashamed of themselves. She sat down and looked into my eyes.

"I am sorry," she said slowly. "We deplore having to attack ponies like we did, but we are starving. Our forest is barren except for ourselves. There is no game to hunt for miles, so I must take opportunities where they appear."

"I understand," I replied. "If we gave you some of our food, would you let us pass?"

"Hang on," Night Rose said. "We need that food too, you know."

"We packed for four ponies when we left," I replied. "They can have my entire share."

"And what if we need it later?"

"Night Rose, we'll make due," Winter said in reply. "Do you want to see these creatures starve?"

"Well, no, but…" She couldn't answer past that. I looked back and she was staring at the ground, one hoof scuffing the ground. I could tell she was desperately searching for a reason to keep the food. Seeing she didn't have one, I reached into my bag and pulled out several packets of rations, tossing them to the ground in front of the wolven Alpha. She looked at them puzzled, then looked back up at me.

"They're wrapped in plastic," I said. "It's not hard to get into, but I don't recommend eating it. You'll know the edible part when you get it opened." She yipped at one of the wolven at her side, and it reached out, almost crawling, to a package. Pulling it back with his teeth, he punctured the package and ripped off the edge. The pieces of jerky inside the bag fell to the ground before him. With a tentative sniff, he took one into his mouth and chewed. Instantly his eyes lit up and he took a few more, a happy yip coming through the chews. His pack mates all brightened at this and leapt on the pile of plastic-encased food. The Alpha alone held back. "You're not gonna eat?"

"A leader lets her followers eat first before taking her own share," She replied. "I thank you for this offering, met-al pony Vers."

I smiled, glad there wouldn't be another fight. "I wish I could help more."

"That you have given us your own share is helping enough. You are free to pass this way again, should you need to. Do you need shelter for the night? The clouds will grow dark soon."

I looked back at the girls. Winter didn't look like she wanted to stop, and I didn't think Night Rose did either. "I think we'll be continuing on," I said, turning to the Alpha. "Thank you for the offer, though."

The Alpha bowed before us, then barked at her pack. The rest of the food was gathered (I hoped there was enough for the one I set fire to, if he'd lived) and they ran back to the forest. Only the Alpha looked back before they disappeared into the wood.

"Vers, if you ever do something that insane again," Night Rose warned me.

"I suggest, we get back to moving," Winter said, cutting her off. "The wolven didn't mean sundown when she said it would get dark." I looked up and saw what she meant. A storm was brewing in the clouds above us. We trotted back to where Tiller was still hiding. He didn't say anything, but I could tell he had a new level of hero worship in him as he hopped back up on my back. I said nothing as we got back on the road.

It wasn't long before the clouds started to drip on us. Shelter came in the form of an open cargo container on the side of the road. As we did our best to dry ourselves, I used a pile of rags I found in the back to build a fire. I had to use some dead wood from outside as fuel, but once it was burning it stayed lit. Everypony ate dinner slowly, as if the rain took all the energy out of them. Tiller curled up next to the fire and dropped away from the waking world.

"So," Night Rose said as she put aside her garbage. "I can't help but notice you're more into avoiding a fight. What's the deal?"

"I dunno," I replied. I just don't want to hurt anypony."

"Even when they're ripping you a new one?"

"Look. It's just like how I feel pain or can laugh or get angry. I can't explain my own programming."

"It does seem odd," Winter said, tapping a hoof to her chin. "Most robots you run across in the wasteland is either a homicidal killing machine or a repurposed guard bot. You are the only one I've ever come across that genuinely wants to help ponies, or creatures of any kind."

"Yeah, I don't get it either," Night Rose said. "I've never even seen a bot with your abilities. Pretty much all the rest are limited. You're fast, smart, and don't seem to have a predisposed objective except for getting us all to New App. Are you sure you don't know why you were made?"

"I might have an idea," I said, and proceeded to tell them about the memories I'd uncovered. They both listened patiently, neither interrupting. When I came to the end of the second memory, and the feelings that had surfaced, they both blinked in surprise.

"That sounds like love to me," Winter said. "They programmed you to love?"

"Why not," Night Rose shrugged. "They seem to have put every other emotion into his skull. What's one more?"

"You said they wanted you to help ponies end the war. While I can understand the motivation, there is no more war. The zebras blasted us, and we probably blasted them too. Why would you suddenly come online so long after war's end?"

"You're asking questions I'd like the answer to myself," I said with a heavy sigh.

"Well, it seems all six ministry mares had a hoof in your programming. That explains why you don't want anyone to get hurt. That was a Fluttershy trait. It also could explain how you were able to deal with the wolven so easily. You had the protocol in your head already." Winter was looking at me very intently now.

"What're you thinking, Winter," I asked.

"I'd like to try something," she replied. She stood and walked over to her saddle bag, and pulled out an object I'd never seen but instantly knew about. A Pipbuck, model 2500. She set it down in front of me so she could speak. "I found this in that house back when you faced those raiders two days ago. I also found a Pipbuck repair toolkit along with it. The former resident must've been a technician or something. Regardless, I'd like to put this on and examine your files, if that's alright with you."

I didn't see a problem with it. Anything she accidentally nudged wrong in my system could right itself. I knew I had redundant backups that saved themselves by the hour. Night Rose, however, looked apprehensive as we fitted Winter with the Pipbuck.

"Lemme get this straight," she said as I worked the Pipbuck tools to snug down the device on Winter's left foreleg. "You're gonna plug that into him and root around his processor, looking for… well, for what, exactly?"

"Something, anything, having to do with the timing of his activation," Winter replied. She winced as the Pipbuck made contact with her nervous system, a pinprick giving the machine a complete analysis of her body. The screen soon had a small outline of her body, but the face was still the default Pipbuck cartoon colt, smiling knowingly out of the machine. I almost commented on that when it flickered, and showed the face of the filly version. My mouth slammed shut. Technology. Am I right?

Taking a few leads from my mane, she plugged into my system. I had to grant her access to a few areas of my programming, but during the course of the process, we discovered that there were many areas that were, for lack of a better term, garbled. Others were locked off, and still others looked to be corrupted. I frowned at that. Didn't I have some sort of defrag process?

"This may help with that," Winter said, pushing a button with her hoof. Instantly, I felt something go to work in my processor, and several of the corrupted segments cleared, falling in line with others and recreating the files they once were.

Night Rose sat on the other side of the fire next to the sleeping Tiller. I could see she was bored, but really there wasn't anything she could help with. She wasn't a tech like Winter seemed to be, so all she could do was watch.

After another hour, Winter unplugged the Pipbuck and sat down, exhausted mentally. "Well," she said with a long sigh, "that's all we can do for now. Whatever it is we were looking for is either buried under a lock or corrupted still. That antivirus program should keep running for quite a while. It won't fix everything, but it'll make a lot of things clear for you. I hope."

I nodded at her, my focus on the upper left corner of my vision. Displayed there was a running commentary of the files the antivirus fixed, purged or ignored. As big as my hard drives were, this was going to take a long time. I set a protocol to notify me of anything pertaining to activation, start-up, or similar terms.

"For what it's worth, thanks Winter."

"It's no big deal."

"You seem to know what you were doing," Night Rose said, sitting down next to her. Their coats contrasted magnificently, Night Rose's blue seeming to blend into Winter's ice blue. Their manes, however, clashed as loudly as a tank battle. Inside I cringed, and didn't know why, as Night Rose continued. "Where'd you learn all that stuff?"

"My husband is a tech-head," she replied. "He taught me everything he could find about robotics and technology. He even taught me to shoot, mainly because of what I said earlier about robots."

"Is he waiting in New Appleoosa for you," I asked, almost dreading the answer. I hoped he wasn't dead.

"I think he is," she replied, her own hope bleeding into her voice. "The last message I got from him said he was going in that direction. He said he'd found something, and he wanted to share it with me and Tiller. That was almost a month ago, though. I hope he waited there for us."

"You told him you were coming right?"

"He asked us to come," she said. "Said he'd wait, but he's not the most patient pony."

"He probably waited," Night Rose said, putting a leg around Winter. "If he cares at all about you, he's sitting there on whatever he found, tail wagging in anticipation of your arrival."

"He's a very loving stallion, even though he's away so much. He might not get everything right, and he makes mistakes, but he still tries hard."

"As he should. He's lucky to have a mare like you."

Winter smiled, then looked over at Tiller. "He's a wonderful father as well. He made so many toys for Tiller. It almost seemed like he enjoyed playing with them more than Tiller did."

"Sounds like quite a colt," Night Rose said. She raised a hoof to cover a yawn, and stretched out a bit. "I think I'm gonna hit it, guys. Long day and all." Nice way to avoid telling us about her. I rolled my eyes and walked away.

"Good night, Night Rose," I said, stationing myself at the door.

"Are you gonna sit there all night," she asked as Winter went to lay with her foal.

"Probably," I replied. "I'm not gonna shut down tonight."

"Well, at least sit closer, will ya? You seem like some kind of gargoyle sitting there by yourself."

I looked back at her, and was met with one of the strangest looks she's ever given me. It was somewhere between pleading and ordering. With a shrug, I sat down next to her, still facing the door.

"That's better," she said, shuffling her body closer to me.

"This isn't like you," I said with a chuckle as she slowly nodded off. "When did you get so clingy?"

"You don't know… nothing… bout me…" She fell asleep like that, her back pressed against my flank. I sighed, and laid down next to her. Something that had happened today had changed her way of thinking about me, but I wasn't sure what. It was so strange. This morning she was practically bucking me away, now here she was curled up against me.

As I pondered her newfound affection for me, which I wasn't really going to complain about, I looked over what the antivirus had uncovered. Most of the cleaned files were about specs and stats pertaining to a few basic subsystems, like how my legs could individually exert 1900 PSI of pressure unassisted. HOW I was able to do that linked to a locked file. Classified. Even to myself. That wasn't a good feeling.

Returning the file scan to the back of my mind, I regarded my companions. One a warrior, one a technician and mother, one a colt. Well, we weren't the most unlikely group, but we must have been close.

A sound outside drew my attention. I gave a quick scan but didn't find anything threatening. There was, however a green dot hovering to the side of the container. I carefully rose to my hooves, not wanting to disturb Night Rose, and walked outside.

"Who's out there," I asked. The only sound I heard now was the falling rain as it bounced off my body and everything around me. "I know you're there. Come out."

Quietly, a hovering bot came around from the back of the container and floated right up to me. It was round, and seemed to be held aloft by four rapidly flapping wings. It's front plate had a large speaker attached at the bottom, and what seemed to be a pair of camera lenses midway up. In retrospect, it was the goofiest smiley face I'd ever seen.

"Hello, Versatile," it said, its voice metallic in nature, but somehow I recognized something behind it. "I'm Watcher, and I'm glad to finally have the chance to talk to you. I need to bring you up to speed."

Footnote: Level up!

New Perk: Animal Friend – Be it your intimidating looks, your smooth tongue, or the size of the gun you're carrying, wild animals don't want to mess with you. This does not apply to large mutated creatures such as Fire Ants or Giant Mantis'.

Quest Perk: Tech-Savy: Be it a terminal or a robot, if it's got a program, you can rewrite it. Your Science skill gains +20%.

Ch 07: Priorities
View Online

Fallout Equestria: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Ch 07: Priorities

FoE: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Chapter VII: Priorities

"Okay, first thing's fucking last." – Nice Guy Eddie, Reservoir Dogs

System Report: 0000000007
Unit Status: Active
Location: Edge of Whitetail Forest
Satellite Signal Status: Connected! Awaiting query.
Begin data dump to external off-site memory back-up:

- - - - - Done.
Preparing visual report: Done.

Date: --/--/2212, 200PA (+11 days activation)
Time: 2314 Local

Crap.

When you meet someone new who is, apparently, speaking to you through a remote uplink that's tapped into a Spritebot, calls themself Watcher, and tells you your purpose in the world is no longer a factor, what else are you gonna think?

For the past hour, I'd been speaking to the exact scenario, and the only thing I could say was huh. In a nutshell, the purpose I was created for no longer existed, as I'd already assumed. I was awake because of a short in the Canterlot Hub electrical grid. Watcher had traced it back to a zombie falling on a crosswire, causing a spark and blowing a generator right next to a safety grid. The reality was that the ponies that had made me had never intended to turn me back on.

Welcome to the Wasteland: Weird Shit Happens Here Just To Fuck With You.

"Lemme get this straight," I said finally. "You're telling me that I was never supposed to wake up? That I'm what, an anomaly? All this shit I've been doing wasn't supposed to happen AT ALL?"

"Keep it down," Watcher shushed. "You'll wake up the kid."

"Well, excuse me for being upset," I replied, my voice at a lower level, "but I just got told I was never supposed to be alive."

"Vers, I know you're mad."

"Was it that obvious?"

"I'd be mad too if a stranger just dropped in on me and told me I wasn't supposed to exist. But the fact is, you do exist. Not only do you exist, you're doing some good, and that's what you were designed for."

"Why should I believe you, Watcher," I asked. "What proof do you have to give me that you're telling the truth?"

"Honestly, none," the bot replied. "If you want, I could rattle off a few names you'd recognize, but really, that's not proof of anything."

"So why'd you come here then?"

"I've been watching you for a while now." No. Really? "And I want to help you out. You're one of very few ponies out there that are going the direction a pony should go. You've already made some friends, and that's great. And the way you handled the Wolven back there was pure brilliance. I just want to try and keep you on that path."

"I think I can do that myself just fine," I retorted.

"Yeah, that's what Blackjack thought too."

"Blackjack?"

"Another pony out doing good. Or trying to at least."

"Things not going so well for him I take it."

"Her. And yeah, she's hitting some hard bumps. But she's hanging in there."

"I'm not surprised. The wasteland seems to like curveballs." We were silent for a bit. Watcher seemed to be at sort of a loss for words. Apparently this conversation didn't go the way he'd expected. "So what's next," I asked. "Obviously, I get this family down to New Appleoosa, but what about beyond? Where do I go from there?"

"I honestly don't know, Vers. Really, I don't know what I expected to be able to tell you when I came here."

"You're also not really here."

"Touché. Well, the only thing I can say is keep your ears open. Opportunities pop up everywhere in the wasteland. Most ponies just don't take them."

I looked down at my hooves and sighed. "What happened to ponies, Watcher? How'd things go so wrong? I get that the war messed up the world, but what happened to a pony's 'Never-Say-Die' attitude?"

"I guess when the first ponies came out and saw what had happened to their home, they just lost heart. There's only so much a pony can take, and it was too much for them. Now they just soldier on, getting along by the hairs in their tails."

"Damn," I said. There wasn't anything else I could say. The depressed feeling washed over me as I thought about those ponies that had their souls crushed by the sight of the post-apocalyptic world. "Well, at least I can make the world a little brighter for two of them."

"Small steps, Vers," Watcher said, the bot bobbing in a nod. "If that's all any of us can do, then we can at least do that."

"Hey, Watcher," I said after another minute of silence. "When's the last time you got out into the world?"

"What do you mean?"

"I back-tracked your signal to a mountain in the Northwest area of Equestria," I told him. I'd kind of done this very early in our conversation, but hadn't brought it up. It might have been a good trump card, but now there was no reason to hide it. "When's the last time you got out?"

"Well, um," he replied, clearly flustered. "It's… it's been a long while…"

"Months?"

"Years," he said sheepishly. The bot even half turned away as if embarrassed.

"Get out of that cave sometime. Go for a fly, assuming you have wings. See how the world is really doing. You can only do so much from behind a monitor."

"It's not that simple," he replied, the bot hovering toward the door. "I gotta go. This bot will fly a good distance away before I let it loose. Don't want to wake the foal up. I'm sorry I dropped such a bombshell on you like that."

"It's alright," I replied. "I needed to know."

"What will you do now," he asked, the bot turning back to me again.

"Well," I replied, walking over to stare out into the rain. "It's like you said. All we can do is soldier on. That's what I'm gonna do. Once I get to New Appleoosa, I'll just go from there. Although, a direction would be nice."

"You can tune into radio waves, right?" I nodded. "Tune into the active radio stations around Equestria. There's one station run by a pony called DJ-Pon3."

"DJ-Pon-three?"

"It makes sense when written down," Watcher said. "He's always keeping ponies updated on the goings-on around the wasteland. Might give you a hint or two on where to go from time to time."

I thought for a minute. "So I become a wandering hero, huh?"

"It's just an idea. See you later, Vers."

"Get out of your cave more, Watcher. You may save a life yourself sometime."

The bot bobbed once, then turned and flew off into the gloom. I watched it fly away for as long as I could track it, then turned back inside. With a sigh, I laid back down next to Night Rose. She murmured in her sleep about a smell of bacon, but didn't wake up. I smiled as I looked over at Winter. She was wrapped around Tiller protectively. Both breathed evenly as they slept.

"Small steps," I said to myself, then turned on my radio receiver. "Ok, mister Pon3. Give me a clue."

"Good evening, children! This is DJ-Pon3, droppin' the truth into your heads no matter how much it hurts! And now, some news!

"It seems that somepony has finally taken care of a nasty raider hide-out on the road to Fillydelphia. And I don't mean gently. I'm talkin' some heavy handed dealin' here, children. Word is, the whole first floor of the place is gone, blasted to hell along with the raiders inside! Whoever they pissed off was carryin' some big damn guns! If you hear anything, Ol' DJ-Pon3 would love to hear about it! And to whoever did the deed, Good on ya! You saved a mess of ponies some serious headache! Keep up the good work!

Next, some news from the Trottingham area, and I'm sad to say it isn't good. Seems a group of Gawdyna Grimfeathers' mercenaries has got themselves in a tight spot. A group of them were up that way escortin' a merchant caravan when they were jumped by a pack of Hellhounds. Doesn't look like the caravan made it, but the mercs were pushed into an abandoned subway station. I happen to like the Talons, so I hope to Celestia they make it out alright.

"In other news, our Wasteland Heroine is as active as ever! When last seen, she was headin' in to some serious trouble in Maripony. Now, most folks steer clear of that crazy-ass place, but she strode in like it was nothing special. I don't know the details, but I'm glad to say she walked right back out again, lookin' none the worse for wear. I'm not sure what's happenin' there, children, but when I know, YOU'LL know!

"And finally, the Security Mare's been movin' herself around the Hoof quite a bit. I just got word from my good friend, Bottlecap, over at Megamart. From what she's told me, our girl took on one ugly lookin' Reaper with some nasty bot parts, and left him layin' in the dirt. Normally, I'm not one to cheer on a pony for ending another, but that particular cyborg seemed to want her bad, and I'm glad she came out on top in the end.

"Well, that's it from 'round the campfire, children. Here's an upbeat tune I recently got my hooves on. It's a little different from what I normally play, but I got this special delivery from a certain toaster repair pony that stopped by a while ago. I think it's only fair I play it for you all, just for some variety.

"Here's Dirty Androids and Pinkie Pie servin' up some nice hot Golden Cupcakes!"

I left the radio playing in the background. This DJ-Pon3, whoever he was, had some real good sources, even if he was a few days behind. Nothing too wrong with that. It also seemed that Watcher was telling the truth about other ponies trying to do some good in the world. If others were willing to give it a stab, then maybe it wasn't so far gone after all.

The upper left corner of my vision blinked for attention. I brought it into my main view and got an excited feeling. The antivirus has uncovered something big. It was clean, but still encoded. I smiled to myself. Finally a challenge.

The challenge ended up keeping me busy all through the night. If it was at all possible, I would have been completely exhausted from the effort. This not being the case, I had my whole focus bent on the task. My decryption program, my lock-pick program, and three assisting subroutines were all working hard, as well as doing a visual attempt. Code passed over my eyes as I scanned stacks upon stacks of data, looking for the correct sequence needed to unlock this file.

The file itself was large, taking up several dozen gigabytes of space alone. I could see tendrils of linking code branching off of it into several dozen places in my main matrix, from my motor controls all the way to that dark center that was my power core. The main mass of these, though, branched off into another large mystery: that classified weapon inside my chest. I was this close to uncovering what it did.

If I had a heart, it would be racing.

A noise from behind me brought my attention to the world at large. Tiller was awake and stretching his little body, causing Winter to open her eyes as well. She watched her foal slowly step outside, presumably to relive himself. I followed him with my own view, but my real attention was still on the file. It was a 82-bit encryption; I was able to so far narrow it down to 27.

"How are you this morning, Versatile," Winter asked as Tiller stepped outside.

"I'm good, I guess," I replied. 22.

"Are you sure? You look a little distracted."

"Working on something. Found a file. Big file."

"Oh really," she asked as she stood and trotted over to me. Once again, the Pipbuck was plugged into my mind and I gave her a view of what I was seeing on my military grade E.F.S. Her eyes widened as she examined the pathways this file took. "This is big," she said at last.

"Yup." 20. "Leads all over my body."

"So I see," she replied. She un-plugged the Pipbuck as Tiller returned and pulled some breakfast from his mother's bag. Next to me, Night Rose moaned quietly as she slowly came to consciousness. 17.

"Do you think you should go outside in case something happens?"

"Like what," Tiller asked, sitting down next to Winter with a container of Sugar Bombs. "What could happen, and why?"

"Vers has discovered something," Winter replied. I felt Night Rose's head come up. She looked at me questioningly, but I was looking into the distance, focused on the code. 15.

"Like what? Is it about him being a robot?" Winter looked down at him, surprised. "I knew from the first day. I was awake when he flew me back."

I smiled at that. Tough little guy indeed. 10. "Here we go, guys. Single bit range."

They watched me expectantly, only Tiller making any other motion (his nose in the box and munching.) The bits fell into place slowly. I was six away, then four. Two. I braced when it hit one bit. Then, anticlimax. I heard a voice in my head that sounded exactly like the purple unicorn from my memory say, "Access granted. Activator code is online."

"Done," I said aloud, knowing they couldn't hear what I heard. They all breathed a sigh of relief.

"And," Night Rose prompted.

"This file is even bigger than it lets on," I said. "But my hunch was right. It activated whatever's inside my chest. I can see the power being rerouted… I need to get outside." I stood quickly, Night Rose rolling away from me as I galloped through the doorway. I heard them follow me out as I stopped twenty feet away. "Stay back," I said, facing my body into the empty wasteland. I mentally pressed the activation button and waited.

"Target lock not acquired," the voice said. "Aborting firing."

"It needs a target," I said.

"How about that truck," Night Rose said, looking past the container. I looked over, and a crosshair appeared in my vision. It floated down to rest on the vehicle then pulsed red.

"Got it. Stand back." The trio of biological ponies ran to the far side of the road as this robotic pony pressed the activation button again.

"Target locked, opening firing aperture." My chest split down the middle and opened wide, exposing a large lens, almost like a foot-wide camera eye. Clamp-like hooks shot down from the front of my legs and embedded into the ground. My body seemed to balance forward almost to the point where I would have dropped onto my face.

"Firing particle cannon."

The world went white. I closed my eyes out of reflex. I couldn't be sure how everypony else reacted; all my sensors went down. Even through my closed eyelids, I could see a beam of pure energy streaking out of my body and into the cab of the truck. The force of the blast pushed me back hard. I felt like I had an orbital launch rocket firing out of me. As quickly as it had started, it was over. The energy cut off and the hooks retracted. I fell to my rump, panting heavily as the chest plates slid back into place seamlessly. Gradually, my sensors came back online. I opened my eyes as a pair of small hooves came to rest on my chest.

"Are you okay, Vers," Tiller asked. I looked around, still trying to catch my breath. Winter was trotting over to inspect the perfect hole I'd shot through the vehicle. Night Rose was standing off to the side, looking at me intently. I could see on her face she was going through several emotions. Fear, worry for me, wonder, worry for Tiller, amazement, fear again. Was she afraid of me now?

"I'm alright," I said to Tiller, slowly rising to my hooves. I stumbled as I tried to take a step, and Tiller called out for Winter or Night Rose to come help me. "I'm alright," I repeated. "Just a little drained."

I looked back at Night Rose. She was definitely afraid, but now I think it was for me instead of of me. I gave her a brief nod, and she ran over to me, throwing herself into a full body hug. Surprised, I fell over as her weight hit me.

"Night Rose, what-"

"I'm sorry," she cried. "I'm sorry I was scared of you! That beam was so big I thought you would explode! I'm sorry I doubted you!"

"Slow down," I told her. She wasn't making any sense. Doubt? Scared? Why? I waited till she composed herself a bit, then let her explain.

"When you shot that bright light out of your chest, I thought you were going to blow up with that balefire egg inside you. I screamed. I screamed like a scared filly. I was so afraid you were going to blow up and kill us all."

"Why did you think that," I asked.

"Because that's how the bombs go off," she replied. She'd let go of me so we could both sit up. I looked down at her as she continued. "When I was with the Steel Rangers, they showed us videos of what it looked like. A bright light, then fire. Then nothing. I thought that was happening. I… I think I hated you then. For releasing that and killing us. But you didn't. I'm so ashamed of myself."

I let her talk. She needed to get it out clearly. When she was finished, I just put a leg around her and hugged her. I felt her tears wet my side as I pulled her to me and held her. Tiller, for his part, ran over to his mom to give us some privacy. The colt was smart, I'd give him that.

"Thanks," she said at last. "For saving my life, I mean. I never thanked you for that."

"Don't worry about it, Night Rose," I replied.

"No, I do worry about it," she said, pushing herself off me and to her hooves. Inexplicably, she walked back to the container we'd spent the night in, saying over her shoulder, "You really don't know anything about me, do you?"

I sat stunned as she walked away. What is with that mare? Crying one minute, angry the next? What's next, maniacal laughter? I shook myself and stood up. It felt like I'd recovered enough energy to walk properly, so I headed over to where Winter was still looking at the hole I made.

"It's perfectly circular," she said as I approached. "And it goes all the way through." She pointed past the truck to a billboard a half a mile away. I could see a burning circle with my enhanced vision.

"Crap," I said, zooming back out to normal. "Maybe she was right to be afraid."

"Night Rose," Winter asked, looking up at me.

"Yeah. She said she was scared that I'd released a balefire bomb and was gonna kill us all."

"Well, in a way," Winter replied thoughtfully, "you did." I looked at her crossly. "Released a balefire bomb, I mean. That IS what's ticking at your core, isn't it?"

"Yeah," I said, now thinking myself. "I guess you're right. Well, in any case, that's a last resort weapon. I don't plan on using it ever. Failing that, as sparsely as possible. Don't think I can get more than two shots off before I shut down."

"Wise decision," she said with a nod, and turned to walk into the container. "We'd better get moving."

I looked down into the hole I'd made and made a very scary discovery: Not only had it gone through to a range of beyond half a mile, but it had burned right through the engine block on this large cargo hauler. Three-quarters of a ton of steel were vaporized in one shot from my chest. This weapon was far to powerful.

Which begged the question of, 'If I was meant to help ponies, why did I carry a weapon that could melt a tank at a hundred yards?' From somewhere in my memory, a saying printed itself out on my E.F.S.

When you want peace, prepare for war.

Footnote: Level Up!

New Perk: Long Arm – You have better than average vision, giving you +5 to rifles and other long range weaponry.

Ch 08: Arrival
View Online

Fallout Equestria: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Ch 08: Arrival

FoE: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Chapter VIII: Arrival

"Ye'll take the high road and I'll take the low road." – Old Scottish song

System Report: 0000000008
Unit Status: Active
Location: New Appleoosa
Satellite Signal Status: Transmission Incoming, stand by…
Begin data dump to external off-site memory back-up:

- - - - - Done.
Preparing visual report: Done.

Date: --/--/2212, 200PA (+16 days activation)
Time: 0930 Local

Quiet.

Five days ago, I'd unraveled one of the biggest mysteries about myself. I'd learned I could shoot an accelerated particle beam a foot in diameter from my chest that had a range of seven miles effective. I knew the range because we'd walked along side debris that had large holes in them for seven miles.

I'd also learned that, even though I no longer had a true purpose, I could find new purpose in the wasteland. There were ponies who needed help everywhere, and I was willing to lend a metal hoof, so long as their cause was right. Two revelations in one day. I could use some quiet time.

The remainder of the walk to New Appaloosa was blissfully quiet. The only excitement we'd seen was a giant radscorpion ahead who didn't seem to want to move off the road. A mile back from it, I got to try out my .50 sniper rifle. The crosshairs fell on the creature and I pulled the trigger. A large boom and complaints of ringing ears later, and all that was left of the radscorpion was six legs, a tail, and a pulpy mess.

I like my sniper rifle. I really do.

New Appleoosa had been described to me by Night Rose as run-down, rustic, and the dullest pile of railroad cars ever conceived. I must admit, my ideas on the place were based on that. I was therefore quite surprised to arrive in a bustling miniature metropolis. Caravans of carts entered and exited the town. Ponies of varying color walked to and fro happily. There was even a playground where foals romped with each other gleefully (this Tiller eyed with anticipation once he saw it.) And through it all, Gryphons flew overhead, keeping watch over the town.

"Run-down," I parroted back to Night Rose. "I can see we'll have a horrible time here."

"It was a year back that I was here last." She retorted. "Cut a pony some slack." Her helmet was off and stored in its accustomed place, letting her red mane fall over her eyes.

Two burly looking Gryphons stood at the main gate to the town. The armor the wore covered their chests and backs adequately, with some armor on their shoulders. It didn't look like it hindered movement of their arms. Each also wore a utility belt that was most likely loaded down with ammunition for the assault rifles they held in their claws. Their wings were flared outward, allowing them better balance as they stood on the lion half of their bodies. An intimidation tactic, I assumed. Probably worked on most ponies. I was not most ponies.

"State your business in New Appleoosa," the larger one, a male from his voice, said to us. He didn't quite point the rifle at us, but it was clear we were a target should it get ugly.

"I'm here to meet with my husband," Winter Frost said calmly. "He's been waiting almost a month for my arrival."

"His name?"

"Starry Grove. A unicorn."

"And your friends?"

"My escorts. They kept me and my foal safe on the long road from Fillydelphia."

The big one told us to wait while he spoke to someone through a small intercom. After a few minutes, he returned to stare down at us. I should probably say stare down at my friends. My size brought me just about eye level with him on his hind legs.

"Go on in," he said to us. "Your stallion's lodged in the hotel next to Absolutely Everything general store. He should be there now. Town rules are no shooting, no fighting, no getting drunk and breaking either of the first two rules. Also, if you're caught stealing, it won't end well for you. Stick to the rules and you'll get along fine."

"Thank you, sir," Winter said with a bow of her head, and we trotted past the guard. My ear swiveled back to listen as the other guard spoke to her companion.

"Did you see the size of that stallion, Phoenix," she asked her large friend. "I bet he's hung like a dragon. That Ranger girl must get a great ride."

"Calm down, Ayla," the male replied. "Save it till you're off duty how about?"

"You're just jealous because I kicked you out of the nest that one time."

"Not that I wanted to be there in the first place…"

My attention turned back forward as Tiller ran ahead of us, with Winter right behind. A unicorn stallion was standing in front of the building we'd been directed to, smiling broadly. His coat was as jet black as Tillers, but his mane was midnight blue, almost purple in hue. A crossed trowel and pick axe adorned his flanks. He reared up and held his front hooves out wide as his son leapt into them.

"Daddy," Tiller cried happily, hugging his father.

"Heya, kiddo," Starry said, holding him tightly. Winter trotted alongside and nuzzled him lovingly.

"We've missed you," she said as he kissed her.

"I've missed you too, both of you." A few more minutes of reunion, then Starry's eyes came to rest on Night Rose and I. "Who're your friends?"

"This is Night Rose, formerly of the Steel Rangers," Winter said, gesturing to her.

"Formerly," Night Rose emphasized with a nod.

"And Versatile. They were kind enough to escort us through the wastes," Winter finished.

"Not formerly of anything," Starry asked me as Tiller climbed up on his back.

"Nothing I know of," I said. Winter looked questioningly into my eye, wanting to know if he could be let in on the secret. I gave a slight shrug, and she nodded. "Just out doin what I can," I continued.

"Well, it's good to meet you both," he said, shaking my hoof. If he noticed the large hole in the bottom he didn't say anything. He shook Night Rose's metal shod hoof as well. "Thank you so much for getting my wife here. But what took you so long?"

"It's a long story, and I'll tell you over dinner tonight," Winter said. "For now, we're all tired, and could use a rest."

"Not me," Tiller said happily. "I wanna go play with those other foals!"

"Alright, MOST of us need a rest," Winter amended.

"Well I got us a room in the Gliding Gryphon. They should have another room empty."

We all walked into the building (I had to duck, the doorway was pretty low for someone my size) and as we approached the desk, the mare behind it widened her eyes. Clearly, she was staring at me. "C-c-c-c-can I h-h-h-help you?"

"I'm in need of a second room," Starry said, bringing her attention down to him. "My wife's friends are quite tired."

"W-w-w-we don't have beds… l-l-l-large enough for…"

"It's not a problem," I said quickly. "Just an extra mattress will be fine."

"C-c-c-c-certainly," she replied, a shaking hoof reaching down beneath the desk and bringing up a brass key. "R-r-room three-twenty-one. Who will be paying?"

"Put it on my tab, please," Starry replied with a smile at us. "The mattress?"

"Will be delivered momentarily," she told him, seeming to finally get over her shock fully. "Enjoy your stay."

We thanked her and made our way upstairs. Starry and Winter told Tiller he could go play, with the unicorn assuring his wife that it was perfectly safe. She looked worried but nodded. Starry then directed us down the hall to our rooms and bid us a good rest, saying "My wife and I need to get… reacquainted." He winked at me, then swept her into his hooves, through a door, and out of sight with a click of its lock.

Night Rose just giggled. "Well, they'll be busy for a few hours, and I do need a rest. I'm gonna crash out. You comin?"

"Nah. I'm gonna explore a bit."

"Okay. Be sure to check out Absolutely Everything. They've got quite a few neat things usually. But don't expect cheap. And don't shoot the owner. She's a sweet pony."

I nodded and headed back downstairs. Don't shoot the owner, I thought to myself. What do I look like, a raider?

On the way down, I met a pony trying his hardest to drag a mattress up the stairs. He didn't seem to have the strength for it, and I assumed it was for our room, so I helped him get it to the correct floor, then proceeded on my way with his assurance he could manage the rest.

The town wasn't very big. I could see almost to the other end of it without zooming. A large crane dominated the skyline. I wondered if it was serviceable, but couldn't really think of a need we had for one, so I let it go. The only other attraction I could see was the playground where Tiller happily climbed around with the other colts and fillies. He looked up and waved to me, pointing me out to his friends as I headed next door into the general store. I smiled and waved back before stepping inside.

Night Rose wasn't kidding when she said they had some neat stuff. And the place was aptly named. They carried everything from ammunition to armor, weapons to warheads, groceries to gravel. I wasn't so sure why the gravel when there's plenty of rocks just outside. I gathered up a few boxes of ammo, and was even happy to find two mini balefire eggs and quickly added them to my growing pile, briefly making a note to return to Canterlot for the rest of the stash there.

I was placing several cartridges of energy clips next to the eggs when a young filly appeared behind the counter. She was a little lavender filly with a blonde mane. On first glance I thought she was an earth pony, but a sudden scan told me she wasn't. She had a scar on her forehead, barely visable, where a horn had once been. She was a unicorn.

"Hi!" she said brightly. "I'm Silver Bell! Welcome to Absolutely Everything, where if we don't have it, we'll scour the wasteland to find it for you!"

"I don't think you need to go that far," I said with a laugh, trying so hard not to look at where the horn should be. "But aren't you a little young to be running a store of this size alone?"

"Nope," she replied. "Mommy's out on a delivery, and since she's the only one who can do our deliveries, I get to mind the store."

"Wouldn't you rather be outside, though," I asked, gesturing to the playground.

"Well…" She rubbed the back of her neck with a hoof and looked away. "They kind of avoid me because of something I did a while ago. But I don't mind. I'd rather help mommy out than play their dumb old games."

Resentment, thy taste is bitter.

"I'm sure whatever it was, it wasn't too bad," I told her. Again my gaze drifted to the scar.

"Um, I'd rather not go into it," she replied, then pulled a piece of parchment over along with a pencil and began to tally up what I'd gotten. She gave me what I hoped was a fair price, and with a quick exchange of bottle caps, my first experience with commerce was complete.

I stashed all the ammo in my saddle bag, then looked down at the filly. "Buck up, Silver Bell," I said, bringing my head down to her level. "Whatever it was, they'll get over it. You'll see."

"You're really tall, mister," she said after a moment, and I had to laugh again. I was getting that a lot today. I said goodbye and made my way back outside. Tiller immediately came running over to me, followed by quite a few of the other foals.

"Hi, Vers," he said happily. "My friends want to see your cool robot stuff."

So the word was out, was it? I gave him a stern look, and he instantly knew he shouldn't have said anything, but my gaze wasn't hard for long. Soon I smiled at them all.

"Well, okay," I said, then lowered my voice conspiratorially. "But you've all got to promise not to tell anyone, okay?"

"We promise," they all said.

"Pinkie Pie Swear." They looked at me confused until Tiller went through the ritual first, then they all repeated it. I nodded, then looked around for a minute. "Ok, as far as anyone knows, I'm just a pony with cyborg parts, alright?" They all nodded enthusiastically, I smiled and stepped back a few feet.

With a command, I opened every port I had and produced all my weapons. A sound bite I'd found back in that MoM radio hub played a loud fanfare, and caught the attention of a few passing adults as my arsenal was exposed. Each stood proudly on the end of a support arm. I made the pistol twirl in its housing, the assault rifle tracked the air, the Plasma Rifle glowed an ominously bright green, I mock-fired the mini egg launcher (the egg was really there but it never left the housing), and spun the rotary barrels of the chain gun. The shotgun and anti-vehicle sniper rifle simply sat there and looked intimidating.

From the right side of my head, I produced a small laser pointer and moved it around as if it was a targeting device. For added effect, the chain gun tracked around with it. The children ooh'd and ahh'd, then cheered as it all folded back into place, leaving my body unbroken. A chorus of "that was cool" and "do it again" followed. Even the adults clopped their hooves in appreciation. I smiled proudly, then noticed another form behind me. Silver Bell had come to the window to watch the show.

"Hey, Tiller," I said, looking back at the kids. "How about you go say hi to the filly in the store?"

"Ewww!" I'm surprised by this reaction from the gathered foals, each wearing a disgusted look. Tiller looks at them with the same surprise.

"What," I ask. "What's wrong with her?"

"That filly is crazy," one from the middle of the group said, a curly haired colt with a green mane and tail that matched his mint body. "She cut off her own horn and painted herself pink before she came here."

"She thought she was inper.. imperso… she was pretending to be someone that was dead," pipped up a red earth filly, and was joined by an orange unicorn colt. "She's too weird. Better stay away from her."

I didn't have to turn around to know what Silver Bell's reaction to all that would be. She'd turned away from the window, dejected and depressed. I looked down sternly at the assembled group, about to reprimand them, but Tiller beat me to it.

"So what," the little colt shouted at the group, causing several of them to cringe back. "So she had some problems before! That means she less of a pony to you? Did any of you even try to make friends with her? Or did your parents tell you to stay away?" I found myself re-evaluating my impressions of Tiller as he ranted. He was also wise beyond his years. "I look up to Vers here as my hero, and I was pretending to be him just a few minutes ago when I was playing with all of you! Does that make ME weird?"

The foals all looked at their hooves, abashed and ashamed. Tiller knew how to hit home, and pulled no punches.

"I think I'd rather play with her than any of you now. Something tells me she doesn't judge a pony by what she's been told." With that, he turned away from the crowd, leaving them looking embarrassed. I had to admit I was impressed, and even the adults who'd stopped for the earlier show were staring after him with their mouths agape. As for myself, I simply turned and watched him enter the shop, where he promptly introduced himself to Silver Bell quite politely. My enhanced ears picked up every bit of their conversation.

"You mean you don't think I'm weird? For cutting my horn off or anything?"

"Nope! Different, maybe, but my mom taught me that different isn't always bad. Sometimes it's even very good."

"… You're weird, Tiller."

"Well everypony out there thinks you are too. I guess we're matched then."

*Giggle* "Yep, I guess we are!"

"You wanna come play?"

"I can't. I'm watching the store till my mommy gets back. But we can play in here for a bit."

"Really?"

"Well, if a customer comes in, I gotta help them first, but yeah!"

I heard the sound of little hooves on wood plank flooring, and giggles as the foals began to play. The crowd of kids were still outside, but one by one, they all went in. They apologized to Silver Bell for how they acted, and soon the whole store was alive with the sounds of fun and laughter. I had to smile, then realized I wasn't alone. My eye caught something on my left side, and I gasped in surprise.

At first, I thought it was a zombie, but I quickly noticed lots of differences. The pony-creature next to me was still mostly intact. She looked well fed even. She had a dull dull gray skin with a few gray hairs sticking out here and there, and her mane and tail were a pastel blonde. Her eyes, one not seeming to focus on the same thing as the other, were full of life, or perhaps it was love. She stood beside me and stared into the store, watching Silver Bell play with the other foals. A smile adorned her muzzle.

"You're mommy, I take it," I said to her. She fluttered her wings (which were nearly completely devoid of feathers, and I realized I'd just met my first Pegasus, or at least she used to be one), and nodded, then pulled a small chalk board from around her neck and began writing something on it in white chalk. She then turned it so I could read it.

Ditzy Doo, shop owner Absolutely Everything. Now I knew why Night Rose had said not to shoot the owner. Ditzy went on to thank me for helping Silver Bell get some friends, and promised me a 15% discount any time I stopped in.

"No worries," I replied. "She's a sweet filly. And really, Tiller did all the work. I just made a suggestion." Ditzy smiled and nodded. I got the impression she was thanking me anyway. She then picked up her chalk and board and went inside. I turned and headed back to the hotel, listening to the stampede of little hooves running out of the store, foals laughing. I distinctly heard Silver Bell's voice among them.

The hotel room wasn't overly large. Granted it wasn't as small as the safe room back in Filly, but it didn't feel like I'd walked into a ballroom either. I set my bags down on the one table and looked around. There was one bed and a couch, and a functioning monitor on a desk near the window. All in all, this room was quite comfy.

Night Rose was, true to form, sacked out on the bed, snoozing the world away. The spare mattress was on the floor next to her. I settled down onto the mattress and looked up at her. She was such a puzzle, this Night Rose. The way she shifted moods so quickly, affectionate one minute then yelling at me the next. I just couldn't understand her. I could tell she liked me. She stuck around even when I pissed her off. But what could have happened to her? All I knew about her past was that she was at one time a Steel Ranger. That told me little, as she'd already confirmed they were nothing like they should have been.

I resolved to not let her leave this room until she explained a few things. It was only fair, wasn't it? I was completely open with her. She could at least let me in on a bit of her past.

Her leg twitched in her sleep, and she mumbled something about lilacs. Her face suddenly scrunched up and a tear came from her eye, running down the underside of her muzzle and dripping on the pillow. Sad dream? Clearly. I lay my head on the bed and put my nose on hers lightly, gently letting my breath mix with hers. I didn't really know what I was doing besides letting her know I was there, but it seemed to work. Her nose rubbed against mine and she smiled. Damn, I bet that smile could melt ice with its warmth.

Okay. THAT was new.

Yay emotion chip.

Footnote: Level Up!

New Perk: ShowPony – You know how to dazzle crowds with your quick wit and quicker antics. Your speech gains an additional 10%.

Ch 10: To The Rescue
View Online

Fallout Equestria: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Ch 10: To The Rescue

FoE: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Chapter X: To The Rescue

"Come on, you apes! You wanna live forever?" – Unknown Sargent, Starship Troopers

System Report: 0000000010
Unit Status: Active
Location: Trottingham
Satellite Signal Status: On Stand-By, Timer is running.
Begin data dump to external off-site memory back-up:

- - - - - Done.
Preparing visual report: Done.

Date: --/--/2212, 200PA (+16 days activation)
Time: 2200 Local

Dark.

The area where we landed was dark. Sure, it was night time, but something about the place made it feel extra dark. Like something evil was waiting. Lurking.

Scary quickly unhitched himself from the Sky Bandit and joined me in peering into the dark. I wasn't sure what his eagle-eyes could see, but I knew what I saw: Hellhounds. Thousands of them. All sleeping in groups of ten to fifteen.

Whose bright idea was this anyway? Oh right.

"Oh, man," Scary commented. "Frieda's gonna be damn happy to see you after all this. If she's still alive, that is. That's an ass-load of dogs."

"Hate to see the ass that big," Night Rose commented as she joined us. Starry Grove and Winter Frost were with her. I was pretty sure they could see at least the edge of the horde; they both looked like they were reconsidering their decision.

"Well, don't worry too much," Scary replied, digging into one of the bags attached to his barding. "Gawd didn't send you out here unprepared. Use these." His claw came out with three little machines, each looking like a miniature of an embedded satellite dish. He passed them to my flesh-and-blood companions. "StealthBucks," he explained. "Mark II's. Don't ask where she got them. Should help you get past them and to Frieda's position."

I looked over at Starry, remembering he didn't have a PipBuck when we left, but surely enough, his left leg sported one of the machines. It came up tagged as a Military issue PipBuck 5000. Somehow I even had a serial number, registered user, and issue date. I briefly wondered what other useless information that cleaning program had uncovered.

"Where'd you get that," I asked as he fit the StealthBuck onto it.

"Traded a passing merchant for it about a month and a half ago," he replied. "Cost me some good scrap, but it's worth it now."

I was about to ask how he'd attached it, then remembered the PipBuck toolkit Winter had. Derp.

Night Rose was struggling to attach hers to the port on her helmet. It wasn't sliding in right for some reason. She had the thing in her teeth, and was fighting with the helmet on its hook. It looked like she was losing badly. I stepped over to help but she turned away from me quickly.

"I got it," she said, angrily. She gave it another shove, but that only succeeded in popping it lose, where it promptly fell to the ground. Cursing, she picked it up and tried again.

"Are you gonna be mad at me forever?"

"Who's mad," she asked around the device. "Last I checked, you were angry at me."

"I'm not angry at you," I replied. "I was just… upset. I want to know you better but you keep bucking me away for it."

"It's better that way," she said, and tried to fit it again. Again it popped free and hit the ground.

I was quicker this time, picking it up and holding it while looking at her expectantly. She stared back, her eyes smoldering with… I'm not sure what. Annoyance? Jealousy? Anger? Whatever it was, it lasted only a minute before she turned her body and gave me access to her helmet. I easily slid the StealthBuck into the socket, at the same time, seeing the trouble she'd been having. She'd been trying to attach it upside down. A smart pony would have kept that to himself.

I am not a smart pony.

"It was upside down," I said, pulling back. The glare I received could have melted steel. I cringed and backed away, instantly realizing my mistake. Without saying another word, she flipped the helmet over her head and sealed it.

I sighed and turned to the rest of the group. Everyone else was ready, or at least as ready as they'd ever be. "You'll be here when we get back, right Scary?"

"Yeah, yeah," he replied with a wave of his claw. "Just try not to take too long."

I nodded and then turned to start towards the city. Night Rose pushed past me, taking the lead. I stared after her, slightly annoyed, but sighed again and followed, Starry and Winter falling in behind me.

Trottingham had borne no direct attack during the fall. Its buildings remained fairly well intact, if not worn and slightly crumbly. It looked more like a large scale battle had gone on here. There were holes in walls, pock-marked cement barriers, sandbag gun nests, and wrecked vehicles everywhere. The roads were chewed up terribly by both impact craters and tank treads. It didn't help much that there were a few thousand Hellhounds around us.

The StealthBucks were doing quite well for my companions. For myself, I had my own cloaking device. It was a function I'd lucked into discovering on the way here as I went over the files I'd cleaned. When activated, little cameras just below my skin would capture the landscape and anything on one side of me and transmit it to little reflectors on my other side, which projected into my skin, making it seem like I wasn't there. In essence, this active camouflage was better than a StealthBuck; it didn't even leave the faint trace outline the StealthBuck normally left. Was there anything they hadn't thought of?

I was glad I'd made everyone copy each other's ID tag onto their PipBucks, armor, and my own E.F.S. It was the only way they'd be able to find each other and me. I had other ways, but the ID tag was fine for now.

Night Rose crept quickly past yet another group of Hellhounds, being as silent as her armor allowed. Fortunately, they seemed to be fairly heavy sleepers. She was following a waypoint to the last reported location of Frieda and her squad, if Gawd's info was to be believed.

One of the Hellhounds stirred as Night Rose went past. I saw his ears perk and his head turn toward her. I reacted instantly, stepping behind him and wrapping my front legs around his neck. With a little pressure, I heard his vertebrae pop and he went limp. I laid him back down, positioning him to look like he was asleep, then moved gestured for her to move on. She didn't budge, so I nosed her flank. I saw her jump, and whip back around to face me. She must have remembered I was behind her, for she relaxed a few seconds later then continued on. I looked back at our other two friends and activated my thermal vision. Both had a look that said, "that was close." I had to agree.

We were about fifty yards from our destination when a pair of Hellhounds stepped out in front of us. We all froze, and I'm sure each of my friends looked down at their StealthBuck's spell meter. My own technology could run for a long time, as it drew power from my core, but the others had to be running out soon.

The two Hellhounds walked forward along our path. I mentally begged them to go away, but they didn't listen, coming to stop right in front of the access hatch we needed. I heard them start a conversation in Dog-speak, a really degraded version.

"Strange bird-cats still inside, right," one asked. The other shrugged.

"Me not care," he replied. "Them can rot all away in there. No fur off my tail."

His companion nodded and leaned against the wall. I cursed to myself. A night guard, which meant we'd have to eliminate them.

"Starry, Winter," I whispered, trying to be as quiet as possible. "You two stay put." They both nodded and I turned my attention to Night Rose. You take the left one, I transmitted to her E.F.S. I'll take the leaning one. Keep it QUIET.

She nodded and moved into position as I did the same. Her target's ear twitched and he turned toward her. "You hear noise?"

"Me hear nothing," his partner replied. "You hearing things."

I winced inwardly as the Hellhound turned his whole body towards Night Rose. She froze, trying her hardest to be a hole in the air. I was about to strike my target to provide her a distraction, when something crashed to our right. Both Hellhounds turned to the sound, and we both pounced. I bucked my target in the face full force, snapping his head around and breaking his jaw. Night Rose landed heavily on the others back and brought both hooves down onto his skull as hard as her armor could. His skull caved, blood spraying out along with bits of brain as I did the same to the first Hellhound. If her StealthBuck hadn't chosen that moment to shut down, the blood she was suddenly covered in would have given her away. I de-cloaked and spun, looking for more targets. None of the other creatures stirred. Stealth kills complete.

I quickly turned my radio to the frequency Gawd had given us to contact Frieda as Starry and Winter faded into existence next to us, and began transmitting. "Help is outside, open up," I said, and repeated it several times before the door opened. We all slipped inside, and the door closed behind us.

I found myself with a nose full of machine gun. Four others of similar variety were trained on us. At the other end was a not-happy looking griffon. She stared at me down the guns iron sights, talon on the trigger.

"Was ist Ihre Absicht hier," she asked.

"Wir sind auf einer Mission von Gawd," I replied. Her face lit up with surprise, but the gun did not lower.

"Sie sprechen Gryphonen?"

"Ich weiβ, aber mein Begleiter nicht," I told her, gesturing to my friends. "Es wäre unhӧflich, dies auch weiterhin tun."

She blinked, then lowered her weapon. Her squad did the same. "It would," she nodded. "I'm Frieda. You must be from Gawd. Glad she remembered us."

"Now that we understand each other," Night Rose said, slightly annoyed she hadn't caught any of our exchange, "what's the plan for getting out of here?"

The griffon regarded the armored pony with only a glance, then nodded to the door we'd just come through. "That's the only way out of here. Past that, I'm sure you notice our dilemma."

"We took out the guards they posted," I said. "Can you fly out?"

"It makes it easier, but we have a few wounded below."

"If you can carry them quietly, we have a Sky Bandit waiting."

"Well hell," she replied with a laugh. "Why not just bring a Raptor while you're at it?" She barked an order in Griffonic to her squad, who turned and ran down the stairs at the end of the hall. "If you can keep them off us, we can fly out."

"Problem," Starry said, joining the conversation. "There's a whole lot of them, and only a few of us. We'll need a distraction to get clear safely. Ideas?"

"Well, Trottingham had a large munitions factory during the war," I replied. History files are awesome when you can read them at light speed. "Suppose we go set a fuse and light it up? Should draw some major attention, and probably a good chunk of the creatures away, giving you a chance to get out."

"How are you going to get there," Frieda asked.

"It's not far from here," I said, looking over the map on my E.F.S. "I'll walk over-"

"Wrong," Night Rose said, stomping her hoof. "You're not going alone."

"They're gonna need cover, Night Rose. You guys need to stay with them."

"They have a few guns too, you know," she retorted. "You might need help. You may be an iron pony inside, but you're not infallible. I'm going with."

I went to reply, but her visor seemed to bore into my eyes. I sighed for the umpteenth time tonight, and nodded to her. I then turned to our not-so-tough-skinned companions. "You two think you can cover the griffons as they pull out?"

"No sweat," Starry replied.

"Alright. Give us some time for the StealthBucks to charge, and we head out." I looked at Night Rose. "Let's get cleaned up. Can't have blood giving us away."

Twenty minutes later, I led Night Rose in the direction of the factory. We both hoped it still had something inside that would make a big boom. As we crept along, I talked to her via text.

So when are we gonna stop being mad at each other?

"I thought you weren't mad at me," she replied.

I'm not. We just seem to be falling into a cycle, is all I'm saying. You get mad when I ask your personal stuff, and I get mad when you give me "I don't want to answer that" responses.

"Why do you care about that stuff?"

I don't know. Maybe because you're my friend? Isn't that what friends are supposed to do?

"Friends also don't pry where they know they aren't supposed to. I don't want to talk about my past. It's… too painful." I detected a waiver in her voice. She clearly wasn't comfortable talking even this much about herself.

Maybe it's painful because you're keeping it bottled up, I suggested. That's not healthy. It'll eventually explode, and get someone seriously hurt in the process. That someone is likely to be you.

"What, are you a psychiatrist now?" There was humor there. I must have been getting through to her.

No, but I'm not the only one who feels this way. Winter's worried about you too.

She was silent for a few minutes. I stopped as a patrolling Hellhound crossed our path. We'd past a few patrols already, but hadn't needed to take them out. I watched him turn a corner and disappear before Night Rose spoke again.

"If I open up a little more, will you stop hounding me about it?"

I promise. We just want to be sure you're alright. I'm not a psychiatrist, but I do know it will help you feel better about yourself, and maybe not want to get yourself killed.

She went silent again, I presume remembering what she'd yelled at me that day a week ago. I looked back at her, her thermal image showing bright orange with a red outline and a yellow center that faded to a dot of white. Her head was turned away, gazing into the distance. "I'm sorry," she said as we moved on. "For yelling at you. And for telling you I wanted to die. It's… It's just…"

Something to do with your past, I prompted, stepping around a Hellhound that had flopped out of a doorway in its sleep.

"Yeah," she said, hesitantly. "If we make it out of here, I'll tell you about it. I promise."

I want a Pinkie Pie Swear on that.

"You seriously want me to do that," she responded, sounding both irritated and confused. "In the middle of a mass of killer mutant puppies."

That's how I'll know you mean it.

"Ugh. Fine. Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye. Happy now?"

Very. ^.=.^

The factory soon loomed over us. Smoke stacks rose out of the back of the building like fingers pointing at the sky. The row of windows across the front of the place (that seemed to be typical of any factory in existence) were all broken, either recently or back in history. There was no door, just a big square portal for us to enter. We stepped inside cautiously. The Hellhounds didn't seem to want to be inside, but there was evidence that they'd been in here. The missing doors lay a few feet inside, looking like they'd been kicked with steel feet.

We disengaged our stealth and proceeded to prowl around. She headed for a cluster of what looked like miniature grain silos while headed into the office area. The hallways were covered in scratch marks, indicating the Hellhounds had been here briefly. Two floors of cubicles yielded very little. I found a few dead terminals, some boxes of ammo, and an unopened medical container, all of which went into my inventory to be itemized. My newfound knowledge of commerce labeled each item with a price tag, in case I decided something needed to be sold.

The third floor was labeled "Corporate Country." I tilted my head in confusion before opening the door. Behind it were stairs up. I entered Corporate Country quietly, and was greeted with a few red dots. I kicked in my stealth out of reflex, then crept along further. There were several offices branching from one main hall. Each one seemed to house a Hellhound with a high-powered rifle in its paws. I considered taking a few out. Those weapons looked valuable. I decided to do it on the return trip downstairs.

The office at the end of the hall was completely empty. A glowing terminal on a very large desk lit the room. Behind it, the wall was missing. It looked like there used to be a large piece of glass that looked out on the factory floor. Every bit of the various assembly lines was visible from here. Whoever had run the place liked to keep an eye on it.

Cutting off my stealth, I plugged into the terminal and was perusing the most intimate of information minutes later. The smaller files I scanned at light speed. Notices and inter-office memos, and a suggestion box that was completely full. Curious, I opened the box and read a few.

Please add a new vending machine to the worker's break room. The one currently in there keeps breaking down.

The awning over the smoking area needs to be repaired. A Pegasus with some weird eyes crash landed on it two weeks ago, and it hasn't even been looked at yet. It could become a safety hazard.

We would appreciate it if the guards for the Special Projects lab weren't so forceful. Cotton Cloud tripped yesterday and fell too close to the doors. Those maniacs jumped on her and nearly broke her wing off. Could you please talk to them?

Special Projects lab hmm? That was worth investigating. Night Rose, there's a secret lab in this place.

"I know," she replied. "I just found it."

What's inside? Anything good?

"No, nothing good." I suddenly detected fear in her voice. "In fact, it's decidedly very bad."

What's wrong? What did you find?

"You'll have to see for yourself."

I downloaded the rest of the files, then leapt out the window, using my wings to silently glide to the floor. I quickly made my way to her tag, bursting into the lab.

"Vers," she said, not turning around. She was ridged, her whole body tense. Her head looked down at something a floor below. I trotted up next to her.

"What's wrong," I asked as I came alongside, then slammed my mouth shut. On a large test platform below us sat a very large oval shaped item. It seemed to pulse and swirl with contained energy, an energy that seemed to want out badly.

"It's a balefire bomb," Night Rose said, her voice trembling in fear.

"Worse than that," I said, my automatic scan complete, "It's active."

Footnote: Level Up!

New Perk: Shadowstep – When cloaked, you could sneak up on a mouse, and do just for practice. Your sneak skill gains 5 points, and you get a +30% damage bonus when attacking undetected.

Author's note: Yes, I did use german for the griffon language and named it something else. For those of you who don't speak it, here's a translation of the conversation between Versatile and Frieda.

Frieda: What is your purpose here?
Versatile: We're on a mission from Gawd.
Frieda: You speak Griffonic?
Versatile: I do, but my companions do not. It would be impolite to continue to do so.

I'm a big movie fan, so I sneak in references when possible. If you don't get the second line, you suck.

Ch 11: The Bomb
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Fallout Equestria: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Ch 11: The Bomb

FoE: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Chapter XI: The Bomb

"We have nothing to fear but fear itself." – Franklin D. Roosevelt

System Report: 0000000011
Unit Status: Active
Location: Ironshod Firearms, Trottingham branch
Satellite Signal Status: Timer has ended. Program is running.
Begin data dump to external off-site memory back-up:

- - - - - Done.
Preparing visual report: Done.

Date: --/--/2212, 200PA (+17 days activation)
Time: 0012 Local

Terror.

The emotion of terror is an extreme form of fear that results in paralysis of the will, or so says Trottster's Dictionary. It's the one emotion that can be considered truly irrational. I know of tales told about Fluttershy, who when facing extreme terror such as a dragon or something of that nature, she would lock up completely, total paralysis of both will and body.

This is what took hold of Night Rose. When I spoke those last two words, all thought of any kind left her body, save one.

"We're gonna die… It's gonna blow… We're gonna die…"

"Night Rose," I said, trying to get her attention.

"It's gonna blow…"

"NIGHT ROSE!" I spun her around to face me, my hooves gripping the sides of her helmet. I couldn't look into her eyes like this, so I unsealed her and took it off. The blue of her coat had lost its color, going almost chalky blue. Her pupils were pinpoints. I'm not being metaphorical. They were barely there. This is terror in its purest form. "Night Rose, snap out of it!"

"We're gonna-" My hoof slapping her across the cheek cut her off. I'd done it lightly, but it still sounded like a gunshot, and it left a red mark in her blue fur. She seemed to focus again, eyes darting around the room, then ending up back on me. "What…"

"No time," I told her. "Grab your helmet. We're getting out of here now." As I turned to leave I sent a burst message to Winter's PipBuck. Balefire bomb found! ACTIVE! Get Out NOW! I hoped to hell she got it.

"Wha… But… We need to distract…"

Shit. I'd forgotten about that. Funny how the sudden threat of being ripped into little bits of nothingness can alter your priorities.

"Alright then," I said, looking back at Night Rose. "Let's draw the Hellhounds in here then. We'll retreat to the roof, then I'll fly us out."

"How long do we have," she asked. Slowly the color was returning to her face as she came to grips with the reality.

"My scan marks it at seventeen minutes," I said, activating a timer on my E.F.S. "That's way more than we'll need."

"Alright," she replied. She took one look back at the massive egg below us, shuddered, then put her helmet back on. As I watched her, I got a return message from Winter: Moving out. You get clear too. Distraction not needed now. Area clear.

Not needed? What the hell?

We both ran back to the main entrance and skidded to a halt. It looked like every single Hellhound had shown up at the doorstep. A sea of large monster dog-shaped creatures, each one's attention on us. One large one stepped forward and addressed us.

"Metal pony," it said, my audio scanners unable to tell if it was male or female. "You come here fer test. You get test nao. You fight, kill all Hellhound. You win, you pass. Test is go."

I had no chance to question him, as seven dogs broke from the pack and charged us. Night Rose already had her energy rifle out and was firing on them. The Zebra rifle probably wouldn't do more than piss them off, so I opted for the chain gun and the plasma rifle, strafing them across both the ones charging us and the ones standing back. We needed to draw them inside. The one that had spoken caught several rounds in the chest, and was about to pounce when a plasma bolt caught him in the skull. He dropped mid-jump and was turned into a glowing green pile of ash.

Seeing their leader go down, the horde began to charge forward, barking and howling. Night Rose and I began to fall back, shooting wild as we ran. I led her to the offices, then upstairs to Corporate Country. I had a sudden "Aww fuck" moment when I remembered there were sniper-dogs up here. The round I took to the chest jogged my memory. I winced in pain as I dropped back around the corner. Behind me, Night Rose pulled the pins on several grenades, dropping them one by one down the stairs into the mass trying to follow us. We were fortunate that the stairwell was so narrow; only a few were able to get through at a time and those that did kept pushing each other back to get at us first.

I looked at my timer. Twelve minutes left. We didn't have time to waste. I racked my weapons and brought out the sniper rifle. Switching to thermal, I saw that the dogs in the offices on this side of the hall were almost perfectly lined up. I put the muzzle of the gun against the wall, lined up the shot, and fired a single round. My thermal showed a white line zip through the wall, then through the first dog, wall, second dog, wall, third dog, one more wall, then streak out into the factory to embed in the bricks beyond. It had never wavered or changed flight path. Have I mentioned that I love that gun?

The dogs on the opposite side, seeing their companions fall, stood away from the doors. It didn't save them; they were still bright orange/yellow in my sight. I lined each one up, and three shots later, the path was clear.

"Vers," Night Rose called behind me. "We need to be leaving now!"

"Path's clear," I replied, stowing the rifle. "Let's go!"

We took off again, running to the end of the hall. A sign on the wall told us that roof access was to our left, so left we went. I stopped in front of the executive office and after reloading my chain gun, fired an entire belt into the Hellhounds that had made it up the stairs. Satisfied I'd bought us some breathing room, I took off again after Night Rose. She was already through the door at the end and was heading up the stairs.

The cool air of the night hit us as we broke onto the roof. We weren't on the tallest building in the city but it was definitely up there. Off in the distance I saw several winged forms heading in the general direction of the Sky Bandit. I wanted to cheer, but I had other problems.

I sent the command to activate my wings, but to my surprise, I got an error message. I sent it again, and the message repeated. I did a quick diagnostic, and was shocked to discover a block command in effect. I couldn't fly.

"Ok," Night Rose said as we got to the edge of the building. "Make with the flying!"

"There's something wrong," I replied. "Something's locked my wings up!"

"What do you-" She never finished the sentence. Six Hellhounds burst through the roof and leapt at us. My chain gun spat a hail of bullets, halting progress of three of them as Night Rose vaporized a fourth. The other two landed on me and knocked me to the ground. Wildly, I kicked out with all four hooves and caught the legs of one with a force strong enough to not only dislodge him, but send him cartwheeling over the near edge of the building. The other took a buck to the chest, but held on tightly.

Night Rose quickly came to my aide, bucking it directly in the head as it bit down on my skin. I felt the synthetic flesh tear as its head was knocked lose, and I screamed out in pain. The bullet from the other dogs rifle hadn't hurt THAT much. I looked at my shoulder and saw blood-coated metal gleaming in the moonlight. Already the flesh was repairing, so I got back to my hooves and tried to activate my wings again as Night Rose finished the Hellhound off. The countdown timer on my HUD read eight minutes. Time flies when you're fighting for your life.

"Ey! Metal pony!"

I looked over the edge of the building to the mass of Hellhounds below us. Another large dog was yelling up at us, his paws cupped around his muzzle. He saw me look and turned his attention to me.

"Not bad, pony! You good fight! Good training for these pups! We give you few minutes rest, then we all come!"

"Gee thanks," I said, not loud enough for him to hear, as I returned to the difficulty of my wings.

"Why can't you fly," Night Rose demanded. "We get this far, we do what we needed to and all of a sudden you're wing locked?"

"I don't know, damnit," I yelled back. "There's some kind of command blocking my wings."

"Well, uncommand it! We need to leave yesterday!"

"I'm working on it," I replied. She was getting irate and scared. Probably not a good combination considering what we were really running from. My clock ticked down to seven minutes. Her head swiveled from me to the edge of the building, then me again. Her body betrayed her nervousness. One hoof kept acting like it wanted to run. I tried to ignore her and concentrate, but none of my reroutes were having effect.

Six minutes. I was starting to worry now. All my flight commands were locked off. I couldn't even access my statistics. Night Rose had backed herself against the low wall that made the edge of the building. I looked at her apologetically, not able to find the words to say how I felt right now.

Five minutes. She lifted her helmet off her head and dropped it to the rooftop. Her eyes met mine, her mouth moved as if trying to say something. No words were coming out. I moved closer to her and put my forelegs around her, pulling into a hug. Her own forelegs went around me as best they could.

Four minutes. Three things happened at once. Thing one: I heard a howl from below, signaling a charge. Thing two: I heard claws crunching into brick and wood splintering as the Hellhounds came at us.

Thing three: My flight suite came back online.

My face lit up as the info sped across my vision. Thinking quickly and without any word of warning, I tossed Night Rose into the air, activated my wings, and leapt upward on four jets of fire, catching Night Rose on my back. As I dove down the side of the factory, I activated miniature electro-magnets along my back, pinning Night Rose tightly to me. We pulled up as the ground approached and shot over a large and surprised mob of Hellhounds. Shots rang out and I felt impacts on my belly and flank. I poured power into the afterburners and rocketed away from the city. The timer counted down to zero just as we cleared the city limits.

The world behind us exploded into a bright white light. A green mushroom cloud rose from where the factories once stood, reaching a mile into the sky, almost touching the cloud cover. Night Rose screamed behind my head, her eyes clenched tightly. My own sight had switched to radar, relying on the rebounding sounds from the explosion. Then the shockwave hit us.

It was like being bucked by a hoof ten times my size. I was thrown from the air, tumbling out of control with the ground reaching up to us. I got control of myself with fifty feet to spare, but I was still headed downward. Desperately, I deployed flaps and pulled up, bleeding speed as I brought myself back into the air. I clipped a dead cactus with my left hooves as I streaked by. It was enough to send me tumbling again. I righted myself just in time to crash into the sandy ground face first, and slid about a hundred feet before coming to rest, my vision going blank.

It took thirty seconds for my systems to reboot, and I awoke to a strange feeling on my right ear, as if somepony was chewing on it gently. Slowly I opened my eyes and took in the sight in front of me. My nose was buried two inches into sand and dry lakebed. Far in front of me a green cloud was dispersing. I could still hear the roar of the balefire bomb as it consumed the rest of the city. The chewing sensation continued all through it. I twitched my ear and was rewarded with a relieved sigh.

"Help," Night Rose said quietly, almost playfully. "I'm trapped with magnets against a crashed air-pony."

"Next time we escape a balefire explosion, you can drive," I replied, releasing the magnets and letting her slide off. I pulled my head out of the ground as she looked up at what was left of the cloud.

"I'm being irradiated, aren't I?"

I checked my Geiger Mueller. "No," I said. "Looks like it wasn't dirty. Just powerful."

She sighed and lay down against me. "You threw me off a building."

"Yeah, I did. Sorry."

"Thank you," she said, nuzzling my side under my wing. I smiled to myself and reached back to return the nuzzle, then checked myself over.

"Scrapes, cuts and bruises, but no serious damage. Missing skin's even healed."

"Can we go home now, metal butt?"

I smiled as the Sky Bandit streaked overhead, flanked by several griffons. Two ponies leaned out of a window and waved at us. "Yeah, lets."

"Goooood morning, all my children out in the Equestrian Wasteland!!! This is DJ-Pon3, slamin' the music and playin the hits for all of you out there! And now, it's news time!!

"One hell of a bright light lit up the northern sky early this morning. You're probably wondering what it was, but I've got it straight from the griffon's beak! Now, you remember that squad of Talons I said was stuck in Trottingham? Well, it turns out the situation was a lot worse than I was told. It wasn't just a group of Hellhounds, it was a whole army!

"Now you must be sayin to yourself, "those griffons had to have been slaughtered." Well, children, the exact opposite is true. Not only did they make it out, but my assistant, Homage, got an exclusive interview with one while she was out that way lookin for info on the unknown pony I talked about last time!"

Homage: "So what can you tell me about how you escaped?"

Frieda: "Well we were trapped in a subway access, surrounded by the biggest horde of Hellhounds you ever saw. The city must've been a breeding ground for them! So we call out for help, and Gawd sends us a small group of ponies. I didn't say so, but I was skeptical on how they were gonna get us outta there."

Homage: "So how'd it happen?"

Frieda: "Well, the big one, someone they were callin Verse (strange name for a pony that size) he gets an idea to draw them all off to the munitions factory, so he and the Ranger pony (she's not one anymore) they head over there to set things off.

"Well not long after, Winter (one of the other ponies) gets a message on her little PipBuck sayin there was an active balefire bomb, and we had to take flight now. We took up the wounded and ran for the Sky Bandit they had waiting for us."

Homage: "Through the masses of Hellhounds?"

Frieda: "Oh no. Somethin made them all leave. I dunno what it was, but the road was clear all the way. We got our wounded in and took off. A few minutes later, we hear a big ass explosion! I mean, a real "Fuck you Celestia Eat Nukes" kind of boom. We knew well enough not to look back till after the initial blast, but when we did we saw something go streakin away from the city. Damn thing nearly broke the sound barrier, it was goin so fast. Turned out it was that big pony and his Ranger friend. And even better, he had wings and could fly, but not like a Pegasus. Like, metal wings. Did not see that coming at all."

Homage: "So he's the one that set off the bomb?"

Frieda: "Don't think so. To hear them tell it, it was already set to blow. By who is anyone's guess."

Homage: "So where's this 'flying non-pegasus' now?"

Frieda: "Not sure. Last I saw they were talking to Gawd, and that was two days back. Think they left since then."

"And that's the story, children. Straight from the griffon's beak! On further investigation, It looks like this bot's the same pony who cleared the raider nest a week back. Looks like the wasteland has a new hero. A strange, robo-hero who goes by Verse. Well, I say well done, sir. We'll be singin' about you for quite a while now!

"This is DJ-Pon3, bringin' you the truth, no matter how weird it is or how much it hurts!"

I turned off the radio and sighed.

"And now, the whole wasteland knows I'm a robot. Is it a rule that only really dark secrets get kept for long?"

We were about sixty miles out of New Appleoosa, heading back to Fillydelphia. In a cart behind me sat one of the largest pieces of machinery anypony'd ever seen. Starry's engine, I assumed.

"Oh, cheer up, metal butt," Night Rose said, playfully smacking my shoulder. "You're famous now. We probably won't be bothered all that much anymore."

"Somehow, I doubt it," I replied, smiling. My smile faded, however. "I still need to figure out why I was locked up back there."

"You've been obsessing over that for two days now," Night Rose told me angrily. "Makes it hard for a girl to get close to you when you seem to be constantly brooding."

"You really don't care that I'm not a real pony?"

She stepped in front of me, forcing me to halt. Her eyes bored into mine, then her hoof reached out and touched my chest. That sizzle of excitement and happiness I'd been feeling every time she touched me anywhere returned again. Yay, emotion chip!

"Yup. Seems pretty real to me."

"Can you two love birds save it for bed," Starry called from ahead of us. He and Winter Frost had taken Tiller ahead with them to "scout the road." In reality, they were just giving us some quiet time.

I smiled and started walking again as Night Rose fell in beside me. She'd opened up a lot to me since Trottingham, telling me about her childhood and growing up in the wasteland. The subject of her will to die and her separation from the Steel Rangers remained taboo, so I stayed away from them until she was ready to tell me. Which, so far, she wasn't.

"You know something," she said as we walked. "For the first time in a long time, I'm feeling really good about life."

"Glad to hear it," I replied, reaching down to nip her ear lightly. She giggled and shied away, but stayed right by my side. "Now, let's see what tomorrow brings, how about?"

Footnote: Level up!

New Perk: Tough as a Tank! – Your hide repels everything from bullets to bombs. You receive a 50 point armor bonus when not wearing any.

Quest Perk: Wild Blue Yonder – Through lots of experience, you've learned that any crash you can walk away from is a good one. Your survivability in any sort of wreck is now doubled.

Ch 12: Curious
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Fallout Equestria: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Ch 12: Curious

FoE: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Chapter XII: Curious

"Who the fuck are you?" – The Who, Who Are You

System Report: 0000000012
Unit Status: Active
Location: Fillydelphia outskirts, Starry and Winter's farm
Satellite Signal Status: Test reports uploaded. Awaiting next command.
Begin data dump to external off-site memory back-up:

- - - - - Done.
Preparing visual report: Done.

Date: --/--/2212, 200PA (+31 days activation)
Time: 0323 Local

Home.

The dream started with myself feeling very confused. I was in someone's home. From the pictures on the walls, it looked like Moonshine's house. She was smiling in every picture. A blood red Pegasus with a lighter red mane was with her in several. His golden eyes sparkled out of each frame.

Those same golden eyes stared at me from across the room.

"What the fuck is that thing doing in our home, Moon," he asked warily.

Moonshine stood between us, facing the stallion. Her voice was defensive but calm. "He's here for part of his programing, Wind. A part that we can't replicate in the lab."

"You know what the law is regarding bots." His full name flowed back to me now. Crimson Wind. Ex-Wonderbolt, now served under Raimbow Dash as a scout. He was regarded as the second fastest flier in Equestria.

"Yes, I do," Moonshine replied. "And I also feel it's biased and wrong. Princess Luna jumped to a unfair conclusion."

"While I don't disagree," Wind replied, "I'd rather we didn't own one."

"He's just here to learn how couples interact, that's all. Just a few days, I promise you."

Wind eyed me, then made a circuit around me, inspecting my body. I'd been delivered here in an unmarked Cloud Lifter freight vehicle during the darkest part of the night. I could understand why Wind would be irritated. We'd woken him up while he was on leave. As he came to stand directly in front of me, I leaned down (my ears were brushing the ceiling of the house's front room) and brought my head to his level.

"Is this the reason I was pulled back from the lines for 'emergency leave time?'"

Moon looked sheepishly at her husband. "Kind of. I thought you'd be happy."

"I'm happy because I'm home with you," he replied. "I'm not so sure I'm happy about babysitting a bot."

"You won't be babysitting anyone," she said, walking up to and nuzzling her husband. His wings flared a bit as he felt his wife's head rub along his neck. "He's just going to observe."

"What's he for anyway? Most bots don't need relationship advice."

"He's going to help end the war," Moonshine replied, nipping at his ear, causing his wings to flare fully and his cheeks to go even redder than they naturally were.

"He doesn't have to watch… everything… does he?"

"Of course, he'll stay out of the bedroom," she said seductively, pulling lightly on the ear she now had between her teeth, gently urging her husband back towards what I assumed was the bedroom. He readily followed, his attention only partially on me anymore. Curious, I stepped forward, intending to follow, but Moonshine held up a hoof. "You stay out here. Observation begins tomorrow."

I watched as the door closed, then took in my surroundings. Along with pictures, the wall also sported a large television built into it, with speakers embedded in the ceiling. A couch was directly adjacent to the TV, and the end table had a few magazines. I peeked into the kitchen, stepping as quietly as I could, not wanting to disturb my hosts. It seemed to be an average kitchen, with all the normal appliances. Stepping back into the living room, I heard soft moans coming from the bedroom.

I was told to stay out here, but she didn't say I couldn't get closer. Close enough to slip a visual probe beneath the door. I didn't understand what I saw, but I felt something inside me start to grow. I got angry, but also sad. I ran through my list of known emotions, and matched the symptoms with Jealousy. I was jealous of Wind. Jealous of him for having her.

I recorded the feeling for later analysis, then withdrew my probe and went to lie in the middle of the living room. I replayed what I'd saw, trying to understand what it meant. Clearly it was a show of affection between the two, but its further purposes were unknown. This was going to require research…

oOoOoOo

My eyes opened to the sight of a red mane. I blinked, confused for a moment, then reality caught up with me. I was curled around Night Rose as she slept. We were at Starry Grove and Winter Frost's home, on the other side of the Crater that was all that remained of Fillydelphia, having arrived the day before.

The road back had been fairly easy, with only the occasional rad creature to scare away or kill. The Wolven had greeted us as we passed, and Starry got to meet the Alpha that evening as we accepted their hospitality. She had her own good news. Her pack had made contact with some ponies from New Appleoosa, and was planning on moving to the town to join Gawd's Talons as merceneries. Gawd had been a hard sell, but she'd agreed. Seems she doesn't want to see anyone suffer either. Other than that, it was a pretty uneventful trip. During the day, at least.

I learned that last evening in New Appleoosa before we left that Night Rose took relationships seriously. Very seriously.

Now the beautiful blue mare lay against my side, my hooves around her protectively. I smiled down at her, fully feeling the emotion I now know was love. It was a different feeling. A good feeling, but different. My priorities were all on her now. And he knew hers were on me. I'd have to make sure we were both safe from now on.

I gently unraveled myself from Night Rose and stood. My clock read almost half past three in the morning. That dream hadn't help me understand anything; all the information from it was hardwired into me. But I still didn't get why I'd been jealous of Crimson Wind. Moonshine had been a good friend of mine, but nothing more. Right?

I stepped to the door of our room and, with a last look at the sleeping mare, walked outside. The night was warm, the residual heat from Crater keeping it comfortable. It wasn't dangerously radioactive, but my RAD counter clicked slowly. In truth the radiation would never get to a dangerous level in anypony. Night Rose's level that first night was probably the highest she'd ever received while here, but I attributed that to the closeness of the Crater. Being a few thousand feet away from it and with fallen buildings and rubble between us, the little dose they received would pass through their system without anypony even noticing.

I looked upward to the cloud-covered sky, my mind still processing the events of Trottingham. Why the hell had my wings suddenly received a lockdown code? It wasn't anything in my own system. Somepony had tapped into me without my even knowing and placed it there. But why? And just as importantly, how?

I heard pony steps behind me. Inhaling the breeze, I caught the scent of peppermint. "Morning, Winter."

"Hello, Vers," Winter replied as she came to a halt beside me. "Bit early to be wandering around, wouldn't you say?"

"I could say the same about you," I countered. "I don't need sleep, remember?"

"I can never sleep the night after I get home," she told me. "Too many memories and ideas to write down. I'll sleep plenty during the day."

I nodded and went back to cloud watching. "I still don't get it," I said after a while.

"What, Night Rose's affection? I think you get that plenty," Winter said with a chuckle.

"No not that," I replied. "I mean the weird lock code. It appeared out of nowhere and then disappeared just as quickly, no trace of it left. And what that Hellhound had said. 'Testing…' I just can't figure it out."

"Mind if I take a look?" I nodded and she plugged in. No permissions were needed this time. She had full access. I trusted her. "Hmm… The code looks normal, like you said, but there is a subtle difference."

"Like what," I asked, bringing up what she saw on my HUD.

"Right here." A marker appeared over the code, highlighting a strip of numbers and letters. "This was different last time I saw it. That '1' was an 'I', and this 'E' was a '3'. Subtle changes."

"Great," I replied with a sigh. "Now someone can hack into me and make me dance the Macarena."

"But…" Winter went silent for a minute, studying her small screen, then laughed out loud. "I see! They used your satellite uplink! They inserted the code four days before it went active."

I read the log for my SATLINK module, and was surprised to find the entry she mentioned. "I wasn't even aware it was functioning. Last time I looked at it, it was still searching for a carrier."

"How long back was that?"

"The raider nest, I think."

"And it never told you it went live?"

"Not once," I replied. I was getting worried. If someone could pop in, drop a code into my main functions, then disappear without me even feeling it, I was in serious trouble.

"My advice, kill your SATLINKs. Make them go dark."

I nodded and proceeded to do just that, locking them in the transmit-only mode. I couldn't cut them off completely, but I could keep signals from coming in.

"Done," I said. "I already did a full system sweep for anything else malicious."

"Well, that's one problem dealt with," Winter said thoughtfully. "But it opens up several questions."

"I'm finding that to be a trend out here," I replied flatly. "Night Rose thinks I've been thinking about it too much."

"She's right," Winter agreed. "Get your mind off it for a while. The answer will probably come to you. I'm going to go try to sleep, and not wake my husband at the same time. He gets quite amorous in the early morning."

I bid her goodnight, and watched her trot back to the main house. My radar registered a small green dot heading toward me from behind the barn. Looking in that direction, I saw a metal ball floating my way.

"Good morning, Watcher."

"Morning, Vers. Looks like you've gotten popular."

"You could say that," I replied with a nod. "I take it you heard about Trottingham."

"And I don't lament the loss of the city," Watcher replied with what I took to be disgust. "Always hated that factory."

"I got hacked while I was there."

"Hacked, you say?" Did I imagine it, or did he sound not as surprised as he seemed. "Nothing damaged, I hope."

"Someone installed a lock code on my flight suite," I said, audio analyzers focused on the little bot. "Used my SATLINK without me even knowing. It happened about seventeen minutes before the balefire bomb went off." This was another mystery I needed to puzzle out.

"Interesting," he replied. Not an ounce of disbelief. He knew. Again.

"You have something to do with it," I said, coming right to my suspicion. "Or you knew. Somehow, you knew about it. Did you know about the bomb as well?"

"No," he replied again. He hadn't even tried to deny it. What was this thing's angle? "The bomb was a surprise. I was the one who unlocked you, but I don't know who sent the code."

"How did you know we were in trouble?"

"Eyes and ears," he said simply. "There were active Spritebots all over the Trottingham area. How do you think DJ-Pon3 knew about the caravan so quickly? He can hack a Spritebot as easily as I can."

"Could he have been the one to-"

"No," Watcher said quickly. "He's not the type. And besides, the only way he knew about you is from rumors and a cleared raider den."

"Who else has that kind of power or tech?"

"Several ponies," Watcher replied. "Red Eye, the Enclave, Big Daddy Reaper, hell even Doctor Stiches has a big satellite link."

"Would any of them know about me?"

"Hard to say. You splattered a reaper, but not one of the big ten. That wouldn't catch Big Daddy's eye. Red Eye's too busy in the Everfree to care, and the Enclave… well, you haven't threatened them yet, so they won't bother you. And I have no idea what Stiches knows. That unicorn ghoul is a recluse. Never leaves his cave."

"So the only one who's a possible is this Stiches ghoul," I repeated.

"I have another reason for being here," Watcher said, bringing my attention back. "Besides confessing to saving your tail."

"Why do I get the feeling I won't like this much?"

"It's nothing bad. I was just thinking… about what you said when I left you last time. Well, I didn't exactly leave my cave, but I did have some ponies over to visit."

"How'd that go?"

"Better than I expected, until the Enclave decided to stick their noses into it. Ended up flash-frying one to prove a point."

"You're a chimera then," I said, hypothesizing out loud.

"Nope," came the reply. "Long story short, I think I really do need to get out more. Problem is, I can't now. Not with them growing more interested in me."

"So why come to me," I asked. "How can I fix it?"

"I was hoping I could use your subterfuge skills. There's a certain satellite feed that I'd like you to tap into."

"I cut off my SATLINK," I told him.

"You set it to "send only," he replied. "Don't forget who you're talking to."

"Ok, so I hack the satellite. Then what?"

"Just hand it over to me. Nothing big."

"And you're gonna do what with it?"

"Just a little harmless poking around," he said with feigned innocence, then returned to serious. "I plan to put a bug in their system that should keep them too busy to come back for a while."

"Alright," I said, sitting down. He gave me the satellite signal frequency, and I went to work. It was on the periphery of my range, but it was coming in closer. I locked into it and, following Watcher's instructions, put it into geosynchronous orbit above a certain spot. I then gave him the passcodes I'd used and shut down the uplink. Easy-peasy.

"Thank you, Vers," watcher said. "I promise what I do won't be harmful to anypony."

"Sure," I replied. The Spritebot suddenly let out a pop, and floated away, streaming the most obnoxious brass band music I'd ever heard. I winced, and returned to the out building that had become my and Night Rose's home. She was still asleep, still curled up in the same position I'd left her in. I resumed my previous spot, wrapping her tail in mine before laying my head down next to hers and giving her a slight nuzzle. She murmured quietly, her eyes fluttering open partially.

"You okay," she asked quietly. I nodded and kissed her cheek. She smiled and pushed herself closer to me. It had an effect. "You're more than okay, aren't you?"

Thank you, emotion chip.

Footnote: New Quest Discovered: Who's there? – A mysterious ghoul named Doctor Stiches has a satellite uplink. Maybe he has more than that. Head over to his hidden cave and find out.

Ch 13: The Waiting Game
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Fallout Equestria: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Ch 13: The Waiting Game

FoE: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Chapter XIII: The Waiting Game

"Eagle River???" – Hot Shots

System Report: 0000000013
Unit Status: Active
Location: Starry and Winter's farm
Satellite Signal Status: Receiver offline.
Begin data dump to external off-site memory back-up:

- - - - - Done.
Preparing visual report: Done.

Date: --/--/2212, 200PA (+33 days activation)
Time: 1104 Local

Grey.

The sky was a darker shade of the color two mornings later. I wasn't sure if it was a good omen or not. Probably not. I stared at the clouds with apprehension. Sure, it would be good for Starry and Winter's crops, but I'd wanted to set off today. If it was going to rain, that would slow me down.

The worst thing was, I didn't know which direction to go. All I had was a name and that he hid in a cave. Past that, I had nothing. I hoped that Watcher would show up again and give me a clue. He'd left so quickly last time. There was always the option of calling him, but I didn't know his exact frequency.

"You look like you want to go somewhere."

I turned my head and saw Starry leaning against a fence post, watching me. I trotted over and sat down next to him. "I do, but I don't know where."

"Well, is there an objective to this traveling you're wanting to do," he asked, cocking his head sideways.

"There is," I nodded. "I got a tip-off about a problem I had back in Trottingham. Wanted to look into it."

"A tip-off," he asked surprised. "From who?"

I didn't know if Watcher wanted ponies to know about him, so I remained vague. "Someone who's helped me out before. I trust him, but he didn't give me a direction."

"Well, maybe I can help out," Starry said as he turned to face me. "What're you going after?"

"Not what," I replied. "Who. Some ghoul pony named Doctor Stiches."

Starry put on a thinking face for a minute. He had the weirdest look when he was concentrating. One eye scrunched to nearly closed, his tongue came out, and his lower jaw slid to the side. Almost creepy. I'd seen it when he was working on that engine. By now he knew the machine inside and out. He'd taken it apart, cleaned each piece, replaced broken ones when he could, then put it back together again. I didn't have schematics for a passenger ship's engine, but I was willing to bet it would run better than new now, even without a few replacement parts. Of course, if we had fuel for it, we could find out.

"It sounds familiar," he said after another thirty seconds. "I can't be sure though. I could ask Winter if she knows anything."

"I already asked Night Rose," I said, "but she doesn't know anything about it."

"Has she kept her promise?"

"Not yet," I sighed. "But I did promise to lay off for a while."

Starry chuckled and wandered back toward the house. I looked out over the field of vegetables he'd been checking. He had a neat auto-irrigation system set up that tapped an untainted well a few hundred feet below the farm. How he'd come across it had been a long story in itself. Regardless, his farm now grew a decent amount of fresh vegetables, the pick of which he and Winter kept for their own food and Night Rose. The rest was crated up twice a month and flown to New Appleoosa by Ditzy Doo, who sold the food to the ponies and griffons there, giving about 70% of the profit to the couple here. Her last visit a day ago had brought Silver Bell along with, and she and Tiller had spent all day learning about the food they were picking.

I was glad that they were doing something to help the rest of Equestria, but I wondered if that made them a big target for raiders. They were pretty isolated here. When I voiced the concern, they'd both laughed and pointed at several mounds of dirt a few yards out from the property.

"I repurposed some salvaged laser turrets," Starry had said. "Now, no one comes close with hostile intentions."

I had to admit, I was impressed.

Now, though, I was just bored. I needed to find out more about Stiches, but I didn't know where he was. I finally decided to take my mind off of it and turn on the radio. The sound of Sweetie Belle filled my head and I tried to relax.

"Hello again, children," DJ-Pon3 said when the song ended. "Just a little news for all of you out there in the wasteland!

"I know you've all been wonderin' about our Wasteland Heroine, but I'm sad to say I haven't had word about her in almost a week now. So she's either layin low from all that Slave-freeing she did, or she;s gotten herself into one tight spot. Either way, I trust she'll come out of it just fine.

"Meantime, Security's been layin' down the law over in the Hoof. Seems a few ponies haven't figured out that that five-hundred-thousand cap reward on her really isn't worth the trouble. I have it from a reliable source she faced down seven ponies lookin to claim it, and beat them all. Sent them home, tails between their legs. I tell you, children, that is not a mare to be messed with. There isn't any amount of caps worth all the good she's been doin for y'all.

"And that's it for now, everyone! Here's Sapphire Shores, tellin us It Ain't Always Gotta Be Hard."

The music resumed. Looked like things were tough all over. Ponies hunting other ponies for caps, ponies selling others into slavery… what's next? Ponies eating each other for food? If it happened, I really hoped I didn't hear about it.

Three days later.

It'd been bugging me long enough. I had to go out and do something. I couldn't sit around waiting anymore. Sure, I had it good here with Starry, Winter, Tiller and Night Rose (especially with Night Rose) but I wasn't made to just sit tight.

"So where are you going," Winter asked as I packed my saddlebags. There wasn't much I'd be needing, but knowing Night Rose, she'd be coming with me.

"Not sure. Figured I'd call my friend and see if he can help."

"I wish I could go with you," she said, walking over and giving me a friendly hug. "But the farm needs me here, and so does Tiller."

"I know," I replied, hugging her back. "I wouldn't ask you to leave anyone behind."

"When are you going?"

"Tomorrow morning," I replied, returning to the saddlebags. "Night Rose doesn't know yet, so she'll need time to pack."

"Pack for what?"

We both turned to see the blue mare standing in the doorway. Tiller was right behind her. Both saw my bags, and I got two reactions.

Tiller: "You're leaving?" With despair.

Night Rose: "You're leaving??" With anger.

"Yes," I said to both questions.

"When were you going to tell me," Night Rose asked. Her glare is not something I'd wish on anypony, and right now she had me pinned under it.

"As soon as you came in," I replied, trying not to wither underneath the optical assault. "I was gonna ask you to come with." Her gaze softened, as if I'd told a filly she couldn't have one toy because I was getting her something better later.

"So you weren't just going to up and leave without me?" She sounded so small and pathetic when she asked that. If I'd had a heart, it would have just broke. The emotion chip, however, gave me a similar feeling.

"Why would I do something as stupid as that," I asked, smiling. "After all we've been through together, I'm just gonna leave my marefriend behind and not even say goodbye? I'm shocked."

I was more than shocked. I was pounced upon. Her forelegs wrapped around my neck as she kissed me, and while I enjoyed this, we weren't exactly alone, and I didn't want to show off in front of a colt or his married mother. I slowly pushed Night Rose off of me and turned to Tiller.

"So you're just gonna leave me behind," he asked, eyes as big as saucers. I facehoofed.

"Tiller, I was gonna tell everyone. I'm not leaving without a goodbye."

"But… we were gonna go on adventures!"

"We still are," I replied, leaning down so my head was at his level. "Just not yet. You're still a little young to go on a real adventure. And your mom would kill me if I tried." She'd already said so.

"But Mom!"

"No 'buts,'" Winter replied sternly. "You don't get adventures till you're at least thirteen."

"Aww…"

I had to chuckle. That colt was too damn cute.

The next morning, after a breakfast of celery and carrots, Night Rose and I set off in a general… eastly… direction. That only lasted about an hour before Night Rose where we were actually going.

"Honestly," I replied, "I got no clue where to go from here."

"You left home without knowing where we're going."

"I do have a plan, you know," I retorted. "Just relax."

"I'll try to withhold my enthusiasm," she replied dryly.

I ignored the sarcasm and activated my wireless, hoping for a signal. If I could contact Watcher, I could possibly get a location out of him. Till then, we'd wander around… ok in hindsight, that probably wasn't the best plan ever.

"Why don't we go back to New App," she asked. "Maybe someone there knows about this Stiches ghoul-thing. It's better than just wandering around."

I'm not a clever pony.

A few hours later (thanks to my suggestion that we take the quick way and fly), we were walking up to the main gate. The same two griffons were on guard duty. They'd seen us several times now, and I was beginning to wonder if they ever got off duty. As it was, they waved us through without any big questions. Comments, however, were abundant. ("I told you she gets a great ride")

Seeing as how we were low on caps, we opted to check the job board. It looked to be a recent addition to the town, as there were very few posts. There were four, to be exact: one asking for escorting a caravan to Zebrion, one looking for raider hunters, an ad looking for new members for a gang in the Hoof, and one from Ditzy Doo about extra help in the store.

Neither of us was interested in going down to the Hoof right now, and I didn't even know where Zebrion was. That left the two other jobs. I opted to go take care of the raider problem while Night Rose would help Ditzy temporarily.

"Hang on," she said indignantly. "How come I have to stay behind? You aren't the only one who's a bad ass with a weapon."

"I'm also over twice your size," I replied. "I'd never fit in that store for so long, let alone help anyone find anything." She didn't answer, but I could tell she didn't buy it. Luckily, though, she wasn't in an argumentative mood.

"You'd better come back in one piece," she ordered. "Or I'll come out there and kick the hell out of the pieces you left behind."

"Come on," I said with a laugh. "What do raiders have that could even hope to hurt me?"

"Yeah, that could do it," I grumbled to myself as another shell rocketed over my head.

The job was for Gawd again, only this time there was no guide. She'd just given me a location and said, "Go clean house." So I did. And discovered a working 88mm cannon waiting for me. Not only that, but they apparently had enough rounds to shoot all day. The only good side to this fiasco was that they couldn't hit a moving target.

I was running from tree to building to tree, keeping myself just out of their sights. The weapon had a full 360 degree turn radius, and used it to its own advantage. In between shots, I could hear the raiders yelling at each other. Who knew they'd be organized enough to run that thing? They were starting to get frustrated, though, and the leader wasn't happy.

"Come on, ya fuckin idjits," he was shouting. "It's only one damn pony and he's as big as a fucking house! How are you missing?"

"Because he's wicked fast, Thrasher," the gunner replied and fired off another round.

After a full half an hour of them shooting constantly, they had to stop and let the gun cool down. I took the opportunity to end the fight, using my thrusters to give me a super jump and landing in the middle of the entire group. The melee lasted 45 seconds, and not one raider was standing when it was over.

I bent the tube of the cannon so no one else could use it, then proceeded to hunt the rest of the raiders. Fortunately, it wasn't hard. They made themselves known as soon as I walked down a street they were on or entered a building they occupied. I took several rounds to the flank, but nothing really noteworthy.

It was inside one of the buildings that I finally got into contact with Watcher. My ear buzzed, and I heard him talking to somepony named Littlepip. Talk about terrible naming. But them, I supposed my own name wasn't much better.

I politely waited until their conversation ended, then made myself known to him.

"Watcher," I yelled on his side, while not saying anything on mine. I still needed to keep quiet. On the other end, I heard a bang and Watcher yell in pain and surprise.

"Vers??" he finally said when he caught his breath. "How the hell did you get through here?"

"Uhm, duh. Android pony with insanely advanced intrusion software here."

"Oh, right," he replied, seeming to get hold of himself. "Well, don't call often. There are ponies out there I'd rather not have finding me."

"We're secure," I replied. "No worries."

"So, to what do I owe the pleasure?"

"You kind of left me hanging last time we spoke," I said. "Never told me how to find Stiches."

"Did I forget to tell you that? My bad," he said, sounding slightly abashed, yet not at all.

"Hardly," I replied. "You don't seem to do things without planning them out. I'm willing to bet you not telling me was part of some plan to get me to take odd jobs and find the info myself. Problem is, You underestimated my resourcefulness, and I'm not of a mind to look all over the wasteland at random for one pony-ghoul. So how about we stop playing games?"

"Boy, you don't pull punches do you?"

"I had a nuke nearly go off right next to my head. Tends to rearrange priorities."

"As does having a marefriend," he countered. "Which I didn't see coming either. You're two for two on surprises."

I didn't reply. He was watching me, was he? That was the only way to know that Night Rose and I were together like that.

"Never thought," he continued, "that a bot and a pony would hook up. But I will say you got yourself a fine looking lady there."

"I'd advise not calling her a lady to her face," I replied. "Don't think she likes the 'refined' look."

"Be that as it may, let' get on with your purpose. I'm sending you coordinates now." The numbers appeared on my HUD, then shot to my map, producing a waypoint. A look at my larger world map showed the marker way off the east side, past the maps borders.

"Where is that," I asked.

"Zebrion," Watcher replied easily. "The doctor was off on a foreign tour of the surrounding countries of Equestria when the war ended. A wayward megaspell somehow went off course and took out the city the doctor had just been visiting. After he was risen, he headed for Zebra country, making it only as far as Zebrion. Only reason he couldn't go further was because the zebra government had banned ponies of any kind from the inner territories."

"I'm not gonna ask how you know all that," I said. "Guess I can take that job now."

"Job," Watcher asked, confused.

"There's a job posting in New Appleoosa for escort to Zebrion," I explained. "I wasn't gonna respond because I didn't know where it was. Now, I have a reason."

"Where are you now?"

"Ten point eight seven miles west of New App taking care of a raider problem."

"I see," he replied. "Well I'll let you get back to it. Oh, one more thing."

"What's up," I asked, curious.

"I got out of my cave today," he replied, nervously. "It was only for a few minutes and I was bringing a pony back with me, but you were right. It did feel good to fly again."

"Never said you had to go far," I told him, smiling to myself. "Talk to you later, Watcher."

I cut the link and saved the frequency. It may come in handy later on. The building I was in was now empty; I'd been taking care of the raiders as I talked to the recluse.

"Now then," I said to myself. "What say we finish this job?"

"Good work out there," Gawd said, setting a bag of caps on the desk. "Payment in full, plus a bonus for having to deal with that cannon."

"Thanks, Gawd," I replied, putting the cap bag into my saddlebag. "Sorry I couldn't salvage it for you."

"Don't be," she replied, waving her claw dismissively. "A gun like that would make this place too high priority, and we get enough troubles from raiders and slavers. So. You sticking around town for a bit?"

"Not sure," I said. "I have a few things I need to get done, but I don't know if I'll be leaving to do them so soon."

Well, if you do stay for a bit, I've got a few more matters that could use your, shall we say 'specialized' hoofwork. Let me know when you're leaving."

I nodded and thanked her again before leaving her office. I galloped back to the job board and practically tore the ad off of it, stuffing it in my bags, then turned towards Absolutely Everything. I found Night Rose helping a customer when I entered and waited until he left.

"Glad to see they didn't shoot your fancy techno-tail off," she said as she hugged me.

"They tried," I replied with a smile. "But I slapped them around for their efforts."

"I don't envy them." She sat herself down behind the counter again. "Ditzy's off on a delivery somewhere, and I'm on duty here until tonight. We got plans?"

"We've got plans, but I don't know how soon we take off yet. I'll let you know tonight. Meanwhile, here's the payment for the raider job." I produced the bag of caps and slid it across the counter to her. She opened it and her eyes widened.

"What the hell happened to get you this kind of bonus? Did you run into a tank out there?"

"Near enough. It's dealt with, though, and no skin off my flank."

"I'll have to double check that tonight," she said with a sly smile. "Right now, you'd better take off. There's another customer coming."

A yellow pony with a brown mane stepped into the store as she spoke, accompanied by another pony, this one red with a yellow mane. They seemed to be bickering with each other, and I couldn't help overhearing them as I kissed Night Rose goodbye.

"Next time," the yellow one was saying, "I'll be the one to make the ad. That crummy one you posted hasn't gotten us one response. I told you to add where we could be contacted, but did you listen? Of course not. Why would the great Apple Cider listen to lowly old Chef Sandy?"

"Ah, come on, Chef," Apple Cider replied. "Don't get so upset. I only posted that a day ago. Give it time. Someone's bound to answer eventually."

"How do we even know somepony's going to even know where Zebrion is anyway?"

Ear-perk, big smile. This was everyponies lucky day, it seemed.

Footnote: Level Up!

New Perk: Dodgy – Your agility gains a +5 bonus, making you voted most likely to dodge a rail gun from two hundred miles.

Bonus Perk: Oh, So Loved! – Your big heart has earned you loyal allies, providing you stay on their good side. When down to ¼ health, your allies gain +25% fire rate, +15% AP, and +15% damage.

Ch 14: Helping Hoof
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Fallout Equestria: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Ch 14: Helping Hoof

FoE: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Chapter XIV: Helping Hoof

Everyone knows that when you make an assumption, you make an ass out of you and umption." - Samuel L. Jackson, The Long Kiss Goodnight

System Report: 0000000014
Unit Status: Active
Location: Caravan heading east.
Satellite Signal Status: Receiver offline. GPS active.
Begin data dump to external off-site memory back-up:

- - - - - Done.
Preparing visual report: Done.

Date: --/--/2212, 200PA (+42 days activation)
Time: 1300 Local

Dusty.

Well, what did I expect? Of course the road was dusty. That's all there is in the wasteland isn't there? Dust. Dirty dust that gets everywhere. I'd had to seal my thruster ports just so they wouldn't get clogged from it all being blown around. There were also a great many rock formations. They all seemed too lose, as if they would tumble down and crush us without provocation.

Whose bright idea was this? Oh, right.

I was walking along behind a covered wagon at the tail end of the caravan. My eyes, scanners, radar, and everything else I had was on high alert, searching for red dots, heat signatures, and anything else that might be hostile. We were barely two days out of New Appleoosa before we'd been attacked by raiders and slavers. Since then, they'd appeared almost daily. If the wind wasn't throwing around so much dust, I'd have my chain gun out in case they suddenly appeared again.

Inside the wagon, I could hear Night Rose speaking with the third member of the caravan ponies, a unicorn named Deep Scratch. When I'd first seen her, I'd thought she was Vinyl Scratch, but the shades of blue in her main were flipped from the 200-years past DJ, and her eyes were a deep burnt orange. Her body was covered in white, and her cutie mark was a double note, exactly as Vinyl had. I chalked the resemblance up to being a distant relative and didn't bring it up.

"So you've been making music since you were a foal," Night Rose was saying. "But you never once thought to use an actual instrument?"

"Why would I," Scratch replied. "The sound metal makes when banged with other stuff is way cooler. And anyway, instruments are way too conventional for my taste. I prefer eclectic music."

"I can see where the same old thing would be dull," Night Rose replied thoughtfully. "You should try recording some of it and sending it to DJ-Pon3, see what he thinks."

"Maybe I will, when we get back."

Sadly, we were out of the DJ's broadcasting range, so the only sound we could hear was the wind and the Brahmin who pulled the wagons talking with themselves. I had decided to trot to the head of the column and get our bearings when the wagons came to a sudden halt. Confused, I cantered to the front while Night Rose popped out the backside of the wagon, energy rifle ready. Her helmet had never been replaced, so I'd asked Starry to integrate an E.F.S. into what was left of her armor. He'd responded by producing a replacement helmet and another PipBuck and presenting them to her as a gift. She wore the PipBuck now that we were on the road.

As I passed the second wagon, Frieda poked her own orange-tipped feathered head out. "What's the trouble?"

I shook my head and kept going, happy to have the griffon along, but still unsure as to why she'd joined with us. Her own explanation was that she'd never been out of Equestria before, and thought she should before some "dirty raider plucked her for dinner." My own assumption was that she wanted to pay me back for saving her tail. I didn't like assumptions though.

I found Chef Sandy and Apple Cider conversing with what looked like a zebra wearing tribal armor. It was made of leather, wrapped around his chest and back, and seemed to be well used. On his flank was a glyph mark shaped like a trio of spears sticking up towards his rump and meeting at their tips. The two earth ponies nodded at me as I approached with Frieda beside me in full combat gear. The zebra seemed to be agitated, speaking almost angrily at them.

"I tell you, you must turn back away from this gloom/If you do not, I assure you of your impending doom/The canyon cannot be traversed/For you ponies, I can only fear the worst."

"This guy here says the path ahead isn't safe to travel," AC informed me. "Something about a tribal war going on between his tribe and one called the Deadly Hawks."

I nodded, then turned to the zebra, switching to his language.

"What trouble plagues this road," I asked. "And what danger could it pose?" Beside me, both ponies stared agape. I hadn't told anypony I could speak zebra, but then, they didn't know I had a universal translator built into me. Frieda, on the other hoof, didn't look surprised at all.

"Grey giant," the zebra replied, a little more at ease while speaking his native tongue. "My people are called the Silent Deer. For many years now, we have fought the Deadly Hawks over land, cattle and heartache born of generations past. It comes to a head now, and all-out war is waged between us. The road before you lays besieged by both sides, and any who attempt it shall suffer a thousand spear wounds and a hundred arrows apiece. This is decreed by both my leader and theirs, sadly the only thing they've ever agreed upon besides each other's undying hatred. I stop you here and say travel no further, for your own safety and my own conscience."

"We make for Zebrion," I told him. "It is a personal matter I am to settle there, and I shall not be stayed. Please, bid me what must be done for safe passage."

The zebra was taken aback. Clearly, no pony had ever thought to offer help. He looked away down the road, his eye seemingly fixed on a point in the distance. "There is but one way to end this conflict. Neither side may survive while the other still lives." He turned back to us, eyes full of fire. "End this conflict. By blood if necessary, but end it. That is the only way that this road is passable."

"I'm not one to go into an enemy camp, death's scythe in hoof," I said, a hint of anger creeping into my voice. "I am not an assassin, and will not play the part well. A peaceful solution shall be found, or no other."

The zebra nodded solemnly. It was what he hoped for as well. "I shall lead you to our leader. Only he knows the full tale of this conflict. He alone holds your key to this Pandora's Box. Follow me." He then turned and started down the road a bit.

"Mount up, folks," I said, returning to Equestrian. ""We're off to meet the chief."

"Is this diversion going to take long," Chef Sandy asked. "We're kind of on a schedule here."

"And how will the schedule stand if you're dead," asked Frieda before turning and flying back to her wagon.

"The road isn't safe," I told them. "We're going to meet his leader and see what we can do about that."

Chef grumbled a little bit, but returned to his wagon. AC turned as well and climbed up onto the lead wagon. "Personally, I'd prefer this be quick as well. But a long detour is better than a dead one."

I stood aside as the wagons got moving, then fell in behind the last wagon again. Night Rose was still perched on the back door, rifle ready.

"You heard," I asked.

"You were transmitting," she replied, giving the horizon one last scan before sitting down again, her mane whipping in the wind. "I heard every word. Thanks for the translation, by the way. I don't speak Stripe."

"Wasn't sure if you did," I replied. I'd connected her without even thinking about it. The translation software had activated automatically. "I want to do this as easily as possible."

"No shooting then?"

"As long as we don't shoot first, shooting is fine."

The Silent Deer tribespony lead us into a large canyon. We seemed to travel for hours before he stopped and asked us to dismount the wagons. They were hidden in a cave next to an arroyo I hadn't even seen until we were right on top of it. The creek it held lead right to their encampment, with some dangerous traps guarding the path. AC and Sandy seemed nervous, as did Frieda. All three kept looking around, expecting an attack or some other form of trickery. Scratch, however, looked curious, but cautious nonetheless.

"Calm down, guys," Night Rose said from the rear, her voice filtered by her helmet and given an almost robotic tone. "They're not gonna jump out and yell 'boo' at you."

How are you doing back there, I texted to her.

"I'm fine," she replied privately. "Nervous, but not scared."

I chuckled a bit, then stopped as I almost collided with out zebra leader. He was making a bird call with his voice, and was answered by another around the bend. Another call exchange and he nodded to himself.

"It is now safe for you to continue," he said to me, turning around. "I must resume my duty. My mate, Te'liana, will take you to our leader. She speaks fluent Equestrian, so your companions may join the conversation."

"Thank you for the assistance, brave scout," I told him with a low nod.

"Thank me by ending this." With that he galloped away.

"So, what's this then," Chef asked, fear creeping into his voice. "Is he just gonna leave us here?"

"No," I replied, beginning forward again. "We're just changing guides here. That's all." When I rounded the bend, I was greeted by the sight of several zebras wandering about, going about their business. Tee-pees and thatched huts lined the shore. We were in an arroyo, but it felt a lot larger than it was. The zebras had built overhead bridges that crossed to cliffs along the wall that rose up three levels. Directly ahead lay a large hut with several bedroll-style blankets within. Torches kept the area lit well; the sun was setting soon.

Another zebra trotted up to us from the big hut and bowed. "Greetings, " she said to everyone. "I am Te'liana. My husband, Da'riano, has asked that I show you to our leader and, if necessary, temporary lodgings."

"We're hoping it won't be," AC said politely. "But we appreciate it all the same."

"Follow me, then," Te'liana said, turning and trotting further down the creek. We followed her closely. The path made several twists and turns, branched off to what my radar told me was many dead ends and pitfalls. Were someone to attack this place, they'd better know where they were going. It was one large and deadly maze. Throughout the trip, my companions asked questions about her, the tribe, and the war they were in. The war, she would not speak of, but she didn't mind telling us about herself and her people.

"We've been dwelling in this land for centuries, long before the war between our races divided us from you. We weren't always so primitive, but with the loss of technology to the war, we've had to make due."

At last, we came to a cave at the end of the trail. Te'liana stepped inside with what seemed like near reverence, bowing her head low as she entered. I motioned to the others, then followed her example as we went in.

The cavern's lone occupant was perched atop a pole made of bamboo, one hoof holding him above it while the rest were splayed out to keep balance. His eyes were closed in a relaxed concentration. Te'liana bowed again even though he couldn't see her, then trotted up and whispered into his ear. Slowly his eyes opened and came to rest upon the six of us.

"So," he said, not coming down from hos pole. "You have come to aide us in removing the threat of the Deadly Hawks?"

"We have come to end the conflict," I replied. "Bloodlessly, if possible."

His eyes narrowed, but no emotion came into his voice. "They have plagued us for years upon years. They attack us unprovoked, stealing our food and our females and wounding our children. They have no honor among them."

"Where do they lie? I would like to speak with them myself."

"If they let you live that long," he chuckled, the pole wobbling slightly. He didn't seem to notice how close he came to falling. "Their home is to the south of the arroyo entrance. Te'liana will guide you as far as it is safe to, but do not ask her to join you in going to them. She would be killed outright."

"I understand," I replied. "We will do what we can." The zebra leader smiled (which looked like a frown upside down), and closed his eyes again, returning to his meditation. Te'liana walked back out with us.

"Remind me again why this is a good idea," Chef said when we were out of the cave. "I thought we hired you to protect us, not put us in danger."

"You did," I replied. "You, AC, and Scratch are gonna stay here. These zebra will keep you safe if trouble comes knocking. Night Rose and Frieda are coming with me."

"Hang on," Scratch said, stepping forward. "Why do I have to stay behind?"

"Because you're not a combatant in this," Frieda replied for me. "Civilians stay out of the fire."

"The hell I will," Scratch replied. "I'm no slouch with a gun. I can fight too."

"Regardless," I said, putting my hoof down. "You stay here. If we need help, I'll yell for it. Right now, we aren't looking for a fight."

Scratch nodded resentfully, not liking the decision but accepting it. Te'liana lead us to the large hut so Chef, AC and Scratch could rest, then proceeded out of the camp.

"Be careful," Scratch called as we left. Night Rose nodded back at him and called "You too."

"So, what can you tell us about the Deadly Hawks," Frieda asked Te'liana as we made our way out of the arroyo.

"From what I've been told, we were friends at one time," she replied. "Several hundred years ago, before the great war began, we lived in this canyon in peace. Ponies from your land would come here to vacation and enjoy our hospitality. With them came many wonders of technology we no longer have. It was a good time for our people.

"When the war began, an envoy of the Caesar came with an order to stage attacks from here. We refused, telling him that we wanted no part of his war with the Equestrians. He was angry, but gave no rebuttal. At least, none we could perceive. He was an evil, calculating zebra. We did not even know someone had infiltrated us until long after the seeds of dissent had been sown, and a tribal war broke out.

"At the time, the tribes to the south were un-joined, preferring to keep to themselves while keeping good relations with everyone else. Then suddenly, they attacked us. Many zebra were lost, as the northern tribes were unprepared for such an event."

"I can imagine," I said. "How did they finally beat them back?"

"The southern zebra fought us hoof to hoof, but we had pony weapons. Rifles, energy pistols, flamethrowers. Gifts from the Equestrian military should we ever have been attacked from without. Once our forces were mustered, we were able to drive them off easily. For a long time, we held them back, but then ponies stopped coming to see us. Supplies ran out, and we were forced to fight them on equal footing. We have done so ever since."

"Amazing," Night Rose said. "All because you didn't want to fight us."

"Indeed," Te'liana nodded, a certain sadness creeping into her demeanor. "We refused war with you ponies, and received war with ourselves as payment. Such was the will of the Caesar." I shook my head in disgust. Whoever the Caesar had been, I hoped he was rotting in whatever hell he'd believed in.

Nearly two hours later, we stopped near a very tall rock formation. It didn't look natural, but age had worn it down to a solid structure. I could tell there were holes for supports to anchor it down. Whatever purpose it had served in the past, it's only use now was as a landmark.

"This is as far as I can travel," Te'liana told us. "Continue along the riverbed until you come to a wrecked sky vehicle. From there, the correct path is east. It will take you to their home, assuming you are not stopped before."

I nodded and started down the river, Night Rose right behind me and Frieda hovering overhead. As we traveled further, we began to see dead zebra littering the way. Some were hung from the rock face of the canyon, other strung across the river with chains.

"Reminds me of a raider settlement," Night Rose said bitterly. "Whose bright idea was this?"

"Quiet you," I retorted, flicking my tail at her playfully. "We'll be fine. Trust me."

"Trust you, you say."

Zebras surrounded us completely. Frieda was tied up on the ground, and neither Night Rose nor I would be able to draw a weapon before they could gut us. The spears at our throats didn't exactly puncture skin, but they broached no argument as to who was in charge. I laughed nervously, then swallowed, feeling the spear tip push slightly harder.

Whose bright idea was this?

Oh. Right.

Footnote: Level Up!

New Perk: Linguist - You know quite a few languages in existence, and several that aren't any longer. You get +15 persuasion when speaking in a foreign tongue.

Ch 15: The Way To End All Wars pt I
View Online

Fallout Equestria: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Ch 15: The Way To End All Wars pt I

FoE: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Chapter XV: The Way To End All Wars Part I

"War should be fought by throwin the ones that started it into a pit with nothing but a stick each." - All Quiet On The Western Front

System Report: 0000000015
Unit Status: Active
Location: Celestial Canyon, Deadly Hawks camp
Satellite Signal Status: Receiver offline. GPS active.
Begin data dump to external off-site memory back-up:

- - - - - Done.
Preparing visual report: Done.

Date: --/--/2212, 200PA (+42 days activation)
Time: 1800 Local

Sharp.

The spears were crude, almost too long for the zebras holding them, and probably difficult to use. But they were very sharp at the point. I should know. I had about six of them poking me right in the neck below my jaw.

"Now what, metal butt," Night Rose sarcastically asked. She too was practically a pin cushion, as was our griffon companion, Frieda. I ignored her.

"Fierce warriors," I said in Zebranese. "We come not for battle but for parlay. Who among you speaks for your tribe?"

"I do," one of the zebras in the back said, stepping forward. "And I will do you the courtesy of speaking in your own foul tongue, pony villain."

"Villain," I said, shocked. "I'm no villain, noble leader. I'm just a pony traveling my way."

"Your way seems to have crossed into our territory," the zebra retorted. "For that alone, you should be killed, it is a heinous offense."

"Killed just because we wanna go to the other side of the canyon," Frieda asked. "That's kind of harsh."

"Quiet, bird-cat," the leader spat. "Your own crime is existence." Frieda bristled, but I held out a hoof.

"We didn't come here for an argument or abuse. We came here to settle whatever problems you seem to have with the Silent Deer. We had hoped for peaceful negotiations..."

"Peace," the leader laughed. He seemed to find it quite funny because he kept laughing. He then said the word in Zebranese, and his warriors laughed along with him. Some, I noted, not as heartily as others. Could be useful...

"Peace is unwelcome here," the zebra said. "Especially when offered by ponies, of whom we have much more reason to hate. Your kind started the Great War two hundred years ago. It was YOUR fault we started the war here."

"The ponies you blame are long dead," I replied. "They were killed when you fired your bombs. Can you not let the past die?"

"The past will die," he nodded, his eyes narrowing. "But only when your blood stains the ground and all the blood of ponies everywhere. Then, we shall have your wished-for peace."

"I only came here for peace in this canyon," I insisted. This guy was getting on my nerves. Something wasn't right about him.

"You wish for peace here? Kill the Silent Deer. Every last one of them. Then there will be peace. I give you back your lives, but should you return here while the Deer still prance, they will be forfeit. Release them." The spears came away reluctantly, and we turned to go. "One more thing," the zebra called.

I turned and stared, shocked. One of the zebras dragged a bound and gagged Te'liana out of the bushes. I heard Night Rose growl and Frieda spread her wings. "Hold it girls," I said quickly, barely holding myself back.

"If you do return, and the Deer are gone, I'll let you keep this one as a memento." The zebra roughly kicked Te'liana in the side, causing her to give a muffled grunt. "For that is the only way she stays alive." He then turned and as one his warriors followed. Te'liana stared back at us, eyes begging for help. I could only stare back. If we attacked now, she'd be caught in the crossfire and likely killed. We watched helpless as they disappeared around the canyon curve.

"We've gotta do something," Night Rose exclaimed. "Think, Vers! Think of a plan!"

"Right now, we can't do anything," I replied. Both girls turned angrily at me. "She's their Discord card against us. If we don't do what they say, she dies."

"And if we do, an entire village does," Frieda replied. "This is not a good place to stand."

"Rock, meet hard place," I said, nodding in agreement.

"Ugh, this is such Bullshit," Night Rose spat. "What do we do then?"

"Obviously, we're not going to go torch the Silent Deer," I said, beginning to walk back to the camp. "I'm thinking we need a covert op." Behind me, the girls smiled.

The moon shone brightly above us through a few holes in the cloud cover. I briefly wondered if the Celestial Sisters were still around to keep them moving for us, then brought myself back to the plan.

"Scratch and I'll get them to come out into the open," I was saying. Everypony and zebra of the village were gathered around me outside the big hut. I'd tried talking them out of it, but like the Hawks, they were hard headed. I couldn't fault them though. If it was Night Rose or any pony else of our group, I'd want to be involved too. "We'll skirmish with them along their territory border. Act like you want it but don't push too hard. Meanwhile, Night Rose and Frieda will sneak into their camp and free Te'liana. Frieda will give a signal when they're clear, then we break off the fight and return here."

"Why do we not just attack them directly," one zebra asked, his Equestrian slightly broken.

"They'll kill her if we do," Scratch replied for me. "Any move we make against their camp openly won't end well."

"I expect them to leave a few guards behind," I said to Night Rose and Frieda. "Do what you need to but keep it quiet."

"Thought you wanted this bloodless," Night Rose said.

"Plans change," I replied, turning away from her. I then addressed the crowd again. "Remember, we're only for show. If you kill a few of them, that's fine, but don't try to win the battle alone. Our victory is in Te'liana's return. We go at dawn, get some rest until then."

The group disperse, the warriors whinnying and cheering while the women did a sort of odd cooing. I shook my head and turned towards my companions.

"So, besides Scratch, who's coming to the front with me?"

"Hey, we hired you, remember," AC said, point his hoof at me. "You're the one who takes risks, not us."

"Expected that," I replied. "No worries. Get some rest."

The night past slowly. Nopony could sleep. Night Rose was curled up next to me as I watched the bonfire outside the hut. I watched the flames dance back and forth. Little specks of burning kindling hopped into the air. I watched the logs go from brown to black, then to orange and white as the fire consumed them slowly. I watched...

oOoOoOoOoOo

"Cease fire! Cease fire!"

I was on a testing field, where I didn't know. Attached to my back, I could feel the heat of a recently discharged flame thrower. Before me were charred corpses. I couldn't tell if they were zebras or ponies. Their manes, tails, and coats were all blackened or gone completely. I stood there, staring at the dead equines, and wondered what had just happened. Then-me was simply waiting for an order.

"By Celestia," I heard somepony shout behind me. "That thing's a damn beast! There's nothing left of 'em!"

"About face, Unit zero-one!"

I turned and saw several ponies standing in a trench, some stomping their hooves on the edge in applause. I felt a smile form on my lips as pride filled me. I'd apparently done the right thing. So why did Moonshine look so sad? My own smile disappeared.

"Unit Zero-one, return to field testing facility," I heard the same pony shout. Returning the weapon to its bay in my back, I nodded and began to walk away from the firing range. As I past the trench, I saw Applejack talking with Moonshine and another pony. The third was a cyan blue Pegasus. She had an unmistakable mane and tail that held all the colors of the rainbow. From the uniform she wore, she was here on a semi-official position. Looking up, Rainbow Dash smiled and waved me over. My order hadn't been to return immediately, and Rainbow was one of the lead designers, so I felt she had slightly more import than whoever was behind the microphone for the PA. I trotted over without hesitation.

"Nice goin there, big guy," Rainbow said, clopping a hoof on my shoulder. "Took 'em out in ten seconds flat."

"I just wish we hadn't had to use convicted zebra sympathizers or zebra prisoner," Moonshine said, head low in remorse.

"Neither do Ah," Applejack said, agreeing. "But them ponies and zebras was already condemned ta death. T'weren't nothin we could do fer em."

"Hey, at least it was a quick death," Rainbow put in. "Better than what they'd have gotten at the prison in Trottingham. Gassing is not a good way to die..." They all fell silent. Then-me took the moment to look at each pony's face. Moonshine had a look of profound sadness, Applejack seemed to be at war with herself, and Rainbow just looked like she didn't envy anyone sent to the gas chamber.

"Is there anything else you need of me," I asked, breaking the silence.

"No," Moonshine replied. I turned to leave. "Wait. There is one thing." I stopped and looked back at her. The look on her face sent jolts through my emotion chip. Whatever she was worried about, I wanted to put at ease. "I want you to remember, no, deeply embed into your core memory. Killing is never meant to be enjoyed. Not by any pony. Not by any thing. If you ever run into somepony or someone that does enjoy it, pity them. Pity what they've become.

"And put them out of their misery if you must..."

oOoOoOoOoOo

I jolted awake, quickly scanning my surroundings. Night Rose had fallen into a fitful sleep next to me, her body pushed tightly against mine. AC and Chef were snoring loudly in one corner of the room, while Frieda was curled up on the opposite side. Scratch sat next to the door of the hut, staring out at the still dancing fire.

"You okay," I asked, not wanting to get up and wake Night Rose by accident. Scratch turned her head and stared at me. Her eyes were wet with barely contained tears. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," she replied, then sighed. "Well, not nothing. Something. Or maybe it is nothing... I'm just thinking of how Da'riano must be feeling right now. His wife's in the enemy's hooves. She's being used as a bargaining chip against us. How fair is it that we're forcing him to remain behind?"

"He's emotionally involved," I replied, a little more coldly than I meant. "He may be one of their greatest warriors, but as you said, it's his wife. He may do something drastic at a crucial moment if this doesn't go the way we want it to. He understands that, so he stays as rear guard."

"Just doesn't seem fair..." She stared out at the fire again. I could see tears falling from her cheeks. "I haven't spoken to my sister in seven years," she said after a moment.

"Your sister?"

"Homage," Scratch replied. "She lives over in Tenpony Tower."

"She's DJ-Pon3's assistant, right?"

"It's... complicated. She asked me not to talk about her job..."

"I understand," I replied. "So what brought her to mind?"

"Well," Scratch said, hesitantly. "I guess I'm scared. Homage always was the brave one of either of us. She protected me when raiders killed our parents. She'd used an old energy pistol to kill three of them so we could escape. Afterward, she'd kept both of us safe in the tower. She made sure I got an education and food, and when we were finally granted citizenship, she got me a job working at the radio station. But I didn't want that."

Scratch's head lowered as she stared at the ground, her tears flowing freely. "We had an argument. No, it was a fight. I wanted to explore the wasteland, and she wanted me to be safe in the tower. We fought for days about it. Then, one day, I got tired of fighting and tried to leave. She tried to stop me, but I ended up punching her in the face. I ran out of our apartment with what I'd packed and never looked back."

She looked up at me, eyes full of sorrow. "I never got the chance to say I'm sorry to her," she cried. "And now I might not ever get to..."

I closed my eyes for a moment. I didn't know what to say that could... Yes. Yes I did. It was a risk on my part, but worth it in the end. And possibly, if I watched myself, I could get a little more intel on where we were going.

"There is one way," I said. "DJ-Pon3 has a satellite uplink system, right?"

"Yeah, but..."

"Do you know what I really am?"

She looked suddenly apprehensive. "Uh... A... cyber... pony?"

"I am the first and last in a line of androids specifically designed to end the Great War," I said proudly. "I was the only one of my kind ever created, due to the Royal Decree about robots in Equestria. I have the most advanced infiltration software hardwired into my systems. I can sneak into a horde of Hellhounds completely undetected. I carry an array of weapons that would make the most modified cyber pony's brain explode in jealousy. I can hack into any computer anywhere anytime. I can place a call to DJ-Pon3 and get him to let you talk to your sister."

Scratch was dumbfounded. It took her a full minute to register what I'd just told her. "You... you can call Homage? How..."

"I have my ways," I replied slyly. Seeing the smile spread across her face, I took it as she accepted. "Just give me a few minutes, and hope there's a working satellite above us." I then went to work, reactivating my receive functions on my SATLINK. I quickly wrote a monitoring program, in case whoever it was who was messing with me before decided to try again, then set myself to search mode. While this went on, I opened a panel on my shoulder, revealing a two-way microphone. Scratch walked over and sat down next to me. Night Rose slept quietly between us, her body twitching slightly once in a while.

I smiled as I caught hold of a passing satellite, setting it to geosync orbit and cross-checking with the other satellites in the sky above to be sure there was no danger of a collision. That being done, I patched it into the Dj's signal and waited for acquisition. I didn't wait long, for a few seconds later, DJ-Pon3's voice came through the receivers in my head. I waited till he finished her news and resumed the music, then sent a query to his SATLINK setup. On the other end, a light would be blinking and a buzzer would be going off, indicating an incoming transmission. Without too much delay, I got an answer.

"This is Pon3," the voice said, sounding part angry and part worried. "Who's the cat hackin my systems?"

"I think you've heard of me," I replied out loud. Scratch could hear everything coming through the mic on my shoulder. "You've done a few reports on my metal flank."

"Well, well," the DJ said coolly. "If it ain't mister Verse, himself. Callin in for an interview, are ya? Ready for me to sing your song?"

"Not exactly," I replied, my eye going over to the monitoring program. It had spiked a minute ago, but the source wasn't the current link. Someone else was trying to get into me. Without breaking stride, I caught the packet being sent and stored it away in a quarantined sector, then sent a file received notice. The link cut out and my mystery hacker was gone. But I had his location. All in less than half a second.

"The true reason I'm calling you," I continued, "is because I'm relaying a call for your assistant from her sister, one Deep Scratch."

"My... her sister?" The voice had faltered, and I suddenly had a hunch about the DJs true identity. I held it to myself, however. "Well, hell," he replied, regaining composure. "I'll go get her. Wait yourself just one moment, miss Scratch. She won't be long."

A minute ticked by, then another. I began to wonder what was going on on the other side of this call, then... "Scratchy? Are you there?"

Scratch looked at me, fresh tears welling up in her eyes. I smiled and nodded.

"I'm... I'm here, Hommy," she said into the mic, barely able to speak. "I'm here."

"I've missed you," Homage said quietly. "I'm sorry I tried to keep you here. I just..."

"I'm sorry too," Scratch said. "I didn't mean to hurt you when I left. I wish I could take it back."

"The punch?"

"No," Scratch said, smiling. "The names I called you. You totally deserved the punch." I heard Homage giggle on the other side, and Scratch laughed along with her. I looked down and noticed that Night Rose had one eye open and was watching us. I winked at her, and she smiled.

"So, where are you," Homage asked.

"We're in the Celestial Canyon," Scratch replied.

"The Celestial... Scratch, that's a war zone," Homage cried. "The zebras there are killing each other!"

"I know," Scratch replied. "I'm kind of right in the middle of it."

"Stay there," Homage said, and it sounded like she was hitting some buttons or switches. "I'll try to get some help to get you out of there."

"No, don't," Scratch said quickly. The button pushing stopped. "I... I want to be here. Not because... well I'm not suicidal. But I'm with a group of ponies who are going to Zebrion, and the only way we can get through is by stopping the fighting here."

"But Scratchy, you could be hurt!"

"I know," Scratch replied sadly. She closed her eyes to fight back more tears. "I know. I could even die. But this is a good group I'm with. The zebras that are fighting... well the bad ones I mean, they have one of the good ones as a hostage against us killing the rest of the good ones. And we're not gonna do it, but we can't let them kill her so... I just wanted to apologize... For being a terrible sister..." She sniffed a little, trying desperately not to break down and cry out loud.

"No," Homage replied. "You weren't terrible. You were... ARE. You are a wonderful sister. Don't ever think differently."

"Hommy..."

"Mister Verse, are you still there?"

"I'm here," I answered.

"I'm hereby charging you with the safety of my sister," Homage said, sounding very official. I could hear the tears in her voice though. "She's one of two important ponies in my life right now. I wish I could keep both of them safe by myself, but circumstances dictate otherwise. Therefore, I leave her in your hooves."

"I swear by the sun and the moon," I replied. "I will keep Scratch alive. You will see each other again. Cross my heart and hope to fly..."

"...Stick a cupcake in my eye," Everypony finished. I looked around, noticing that even AC and Chef Sandy had joined in. Frieda was smiling as well.

"Sounds like you found a good group, Scratchy," Homage said, chuckling. "You stay safe."

"You too, Hommy. I love you."

"Love you too, sis." I heard a tone and cut the mic off. The signal stopped transmitting.

Scratch lowered her head and smiled. "Thank you," she said to me, then turned to everyone else. "All of you."

"No sweat," Night Rose said. "It's pretty much what we'd have done anyway."

Scratch's smile grew wider, then she turned and laid down. Her smile stayed in place as she drifted off to sleep. Everyone else followed her lead. I smiled to myself and curled up around Night Rose again. I was worried for her own safety, but I knew she was capable, and she'd have Frieda watching her back from above.

I closed my eyes, and Moonshine's words returned to me.

Killing is never meant to be enjoyed. Not by any pony. Not by any thing. If you ever run into somepony or someone that does enjoy it, pity them. Pity what they've become.

"And put them out of their misery if you must..."

I must. I must...

I would.

Footnote: Level Up!

New Perk: "Awareness... It Was Under E!" Rank 2 - Your visual receptors have picked up everything from high explosives ready to blow to intense heartache. You gain a further 10% to Perception on top of the previous ranking.

New Quest: There Will Be Blood - The Deadly Hawks leader has been stirring up trouble in the Canyon for too long. It's time somepony ended it...

Ch 16: The Way To End All Wars pt II
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Fallout Equestria: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Ch 16: The Way To End All Wars pt II

FoE: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Chapter XVI: The Way To End All Wars Part II

"War will make corpses of us all." Faramir, Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers

System Report: 0000000016
Unit Status: Active
Location: Celestial Canyon
Satellite Signal Status: Receiver offline. GPS active.
Begin data dump to external off-site memory back-up:

- - - - - Done.
Preparing visual report: Done.

Date: --/--/2212, 200PA (+43 days activation)
Time: 0430 Local

Pre-Dawn.

Night Rose and Frieda had already left as the warriors of the Silent Deer tribe assembled. Scratch stood beside me, the tears of last night long dry on her cheeks. Around us, a hundred zebra were preparing for battle. As we watched, the females went around to each warrior (except Da'riano) and painted their black stripes a vibrant red. Head to tail, shoulder to hoof, every black mark on their body was covered in a red paste. I assumed it would wash out later; I'd not seen any red striped zebra before now.

Scratch, too, had opted to be painted like the zebra were but having no such black marks on her body, they simply painted stripes onto her, and even painted over her cutie mark as well. It now looked like a double-note with blood dripping from it. Deadly music.

"Well, shit. How'd we get roped into this?" AC and Chef were standing with us, both having received a similar treatment (for AC it was slightly different, as he was already the red color they used, they striped his mane and tail). "Weren't you supposed to be the one taking the risks?"

"I am," I replied, not taking my eyes off the zebras. "But you made a Pinkie Pie Swear. In case you weren't aware, they're unbreakable. Scratch is going to the front and so am I. Because of what you said last night, so are you."

"I understand that," Chef replied. "I just don't think I like the idea of killing somepony. Or, in this case, some zebra."

"You don't have to kill them," AC said, nudging his friend. "Just knock them out. One good buck to the teeth will drop anything."

Except me, I thought humorously. After a few minutes, I spoke out loud. "Guys, I had thoughts last night." Ignoring their mock terror, I continued. "If we get the chance, we should finish this war. We can't stay her for too long."

"You want to end it today," Scratch asked. "Take out the Hawks completely?"

"No, not completely. Just remove their head. We take out their leader and anyone else who looks bloodthirsty. "

"They all seem bloodthirsty to me," she replied.

"Not all. A few seem like they don't want to fight. I'll deal with it, if it comes up."

A cheer rose from the back of the camp, and their leader walked out into the open and straight up to us. Out in the open air, he seemed feebler than he had in his cave, like the cave was the only thing keeping him alive.

"I know what I look like," he said to me, forestalling any comments. "Everyone here knows of the curse I have upon my head. It is why I cannot lead my people into battle anymore. I was cursed years ago by a wandering sorceress zebra to be trapped in my cave, lest I age prematurely. Fortunately, the process will reverse once I return to the cave. This being the case, I appoint you, Versatile, as war party leader. My people will follow you wherever you need them go. I wish you all luck."

With that, he turned and slowly walked back towards his cave. I could see the years piling up on him. Let it never be said there are no such things as curses.

"Alright, everyone," I called, amplifying my voice to be heard over the whinnies and yelling. "You all know what we're about! Let's get to it!" I reared back and charged out of the camp, three ponies and a herd of zebra on me tail, all cheering and whooping.

The scouts told me as we neared the border that the Deadly Hawks were all riled up and massing for the fight. Their own leader was at the head of the group. I silently hoped that Night Rose and Frieda could pull off their end.

We reached the river that separated the two tribe's territories shortly after. I nodded to Scratch, who smiled back and stepped forward. Her horn began to glow as she spoke.

"WAKE UP, HAWKS," she yelled, her voice amplified by the spell she was using. "IT'S TIME FOR SOME ECLECTIC ROCK TO CLEAN OUT YOUR EARS!!!" Out of her horn, a drum beat started, very loud. Its sound reverberated off the walls of the canyon. Soon, it was joined by two pipes banging together in rhythm with the drum. Then what sounded like trash can lids banging together. The zebras seemed to think this was a war song, and began to stomp their own hooves and shout out with the music. It was loud, it was random, it was eclectic. Part of me wished I was recording it.

The Deadly Hawks then appeared, galloping around the bend on the other side of the river. Sure enough, their leader was there, but not leading them. He'd taken a position above on a small rise. He glared down at me, then shouted a war cry in zebra that was echoed by his warriors.

The Silent Deer shouted one back, and as one we all ran forward, clashing in the middle of the river. The rushing water made it tough for them to fight, but it wasn't so bad as to pick them up and carry them away in mid strike. The river was only about 9 inches deep, but it could possibly carry a pony away.

I kicked and reared, bringing down zebras with each blow. To my left, Scratch had two zebras held in mid-air with her magic. With a grunt, she flung them into another group of Hawks that were coming her way. That being done, she let out her own yell and charged into them.

AC and Chef were on my right, holding their own wonderfully. Chef hadn't killed any zebras, but he'd taken AC's advice to heart, bucking like mad at any zebra that wasn't red striped. AC, however, had a pistol gripped in his mouth and, when not bucking closer targets, was shooting at the ones that were coming down into the fray.

Arrows and spears flew through the air. Zebras with spiked shoes kicked and bucked at each other. Here and there, gunshots went off, and all around, zebras fell. Some zebras got back up and fought on. Others didn't, and their blood washed into the river, soaking hooves and dying them red. I had a lull in my area, and a flash of light caught my eye. On the far end of the river, I saw Night Rose and Frieda running towards us.

Te'liana was not with them.

I fought my way through the crowd and met them at the edge of the battle. Night Rose said nothing, her ears drooping and her eyes avoiding mine. Frieda was puffed up and looked very angry. She glared at the zebras battling behind us. I had a bad feeling...

"Where's Te'liana?"

"Dead," Night Rose replied sadly. My emotion chip simulated my heart sinking to the core of the planet. "Long dead, we think. She was tied between some posts and gutted. She... there was nothing left of her insides... I... I'm sorry..."

I felt a burning in my chest, and a rage I'd never felt before came bubbling up inside me. I turned away from the two girls, and started walking back into the battle. "The red stripes are on our side," I called over my shoulder. I heard Frieda lift out of the water and start shooting. Night Rose, for her part, simply stood there, occasionally firing on targets. I was sure she felt as devastated as I did. I was just planning on handling it differently.

Once I'd found the heart of the maelstrom, I released hell.

Ports all over my body opened, and every weapon I carried except for the sniper rifle and egg launcher emerged. The Silent Deer, seeing the look in my eye, began to pull back to their side of the river. The Hawks foolishly tried to follow. I opened up with everything I had, cutting down every zebra that wasn't red painted that came near the borderline. I don't know how many I'd killed before they retreated to their own side. I didn't care either.

My eyes shot up at their leader, who was beginning to back away from the edge. No, you don't! I lit my thrusters and landed right on top of him, breaking his spine with my weight, as well as the Cliffside ledge. It held though, giving everyone a view of what came to pass.

"You killed her," I said angrily. "Didn't even wait and see if we ran you errand! You just fucking killed her!!"

"As shall I kill you," he spat back, and a bladed hoof came up and struck me in the ribs. It broke flesh, and I started to bleed on him, but the six-inch blade failed to break through the armor beneath. A look of confusion crossed his face as he struck me again and again in different spots of my belly, each one being met with a clang. My weapons returned to stored positions and I glowered at him.

"This war is over," I growled. "You will stop fighting now."

"This war only ends in my death," he replied evenly. It was a mistake.

"So be it," I said. In an instant, my sniper rifle was out, the barrel was between his eyes, and then I was sprayed by a mist of red. I stepped off of the body and turned to the remaining Hawks. "Who now leads," I shouted.

"I do," one said, stepping forward. "And I will see you dead for-"

KA-POW!

His head disappeared, as did part of his backside. He fell like a rock and zebras backed away from the corpse.

"You barbaric-" Another started to shout, but met a similar end.

"Now, who leads?" I stared down at the zebra as they looked around at each other. Finally one stepped forward. My rifle was instantly targeting him and I glared.

"I will lead my tribe away from this site," he said nervously. "The war is done. You are victorious, and we will leave the canyon." There was no anger in his eyes. I only saw sorrow as he began to walk away. The others followed after a moment's hesitation. As they disappeared around the corner, I took a deep breath and calmed myself. I finally noticed the cheering behind me, and turned to see nearly every member of the Silent Deer tribe on the edge of the river, stomping their hooves and hooting into the air. Everyone cheered... except for Night Rose. She looked up at me and half smiled. I didn't return it. I couldn't. I could only look away. This wasn't how it was supposed to end.

We were on the road again within hours, Chef grumbling about his coat retaining some of the dye. The Deer had wanted to throw a party in our honor, but we'd refused, saying we really had to be on our way. Instead, they restocked our rations and gave us an escort to the end of the canyon. I didn't see Da'riano at all, and I felt sure he would blame me for the loss of his wife. I followed the caravan numbly. Night Rose walked beside me silently. She was waiting for me to speak.

"That went wrong," I said finally, an hour after leaving the canyon. "It was supposed to be bloodless."

"You did what you had to," Night Rose said, hoping to comfort me.

"No I didn't," I replied. "I got an innocent zebra killed, then I lost my temper and killed three more out of anger."

"You ended a two hundred-year-long war," she persisted. "You're a hero to those people."

"I'm no hero," I said bitterly. "I'm no better than that zebra leader."

"Stop right there," she said, stepping in front of me. "You did what you had to do. That zebra's death was not your fault. Te'liana was not your fault. They killed her anyway, despite using her as a bargaining chip. She died for laughs. You didn't kill for fun." Her purple eyes looked deeply into mine. She would tolerate no questions. She then seemed to calm, her voice softening. "As for your reaction to it, that was a normal reaction, I think. Hell, when I first saw what they did, I wanted to torch the camp. Frieda held me back though. 'The ones responsible need to be dealt with,' she said. 'Destroying their campground won't solve anything.'"

I just stood there, listening. I knew she was right, and it wasn't my fault, but I still felt responsible. I was about to say so when my radar went off. I turned and spotted a zebra trotting after us. Da'riano.

I looked forward again and noticed that the caravan had stopped, and everyone was looking at us. Night Rose nuzzled my chest, then went to join Scratch with the last wagon. I turned and faced Da'riano as he came to a halt a meter away. He was dressed in the armor we'd met him in, but a semi-automatic assault rifle was slung across his back. A 10X scope was attached to it. The wind blew between us as we looked each other over.

"Da'riano," I started to say, but he held a hoof up to stop me talking.

"I do not blame you," he said in Zebranese. "The death of my wife is a pain I will bear forever, but her death was not caused by your hooves" He seemed hesitant to continue, but went on nonetheless. "She was... she was sick. There was a pain in her none of our healers could alleviate. It plagued her, kept her from bearing a foal. She hurt so bad sometimes, she begged me to end her life. I am glad her pain is at an end. Do not bear it for her, or for me."

The zebra walked up and put a hoof on my chest, staring into my eyes. "We are brothers, Iron Skin. You released my wife from her torment with your arrival, and while I wish it could have been otherwise, I will love you for it." I didn't understand, not fully, but I nodded and put a hoof to his chest.

"I am eternally sorry for your loss," I said to him. "There is no way I can remove your suffering, but I will gladly accept you as a brother."

"I wish to travel with your party, should you have me," he replied. "Without my wife, the Silent Deer are just a people to me. They understand my wishes and pray for my safety. Will you have me, brother?"

"We will," I said, smiling. "But you had best learn the language of the ponies. I cannot continually be your voice to them or theirs for you."

"I will, brother. You should know that with my people I also leave my name. Before I took the warrior's ritual, I was known as Zirconium. I would like to be known as such again."

"I would be honored to know you as any name you would chose," I replied, bowing. "I expect, though, that my companions may shorten the name for ease of speech. Please take no offense."

He nodded happily, then trotted over to join with Night Rose and Scratch, who hugged him tightly before climbing back onto the wagon. I looked up toward AC at the front, and he nodded knowingly. He then turned away and got the caravan rolling again.

I looked up into the sky, and noticed, for the first time, that there were no clouds above us. The sun shone brightly as it fell to the west. I smiled again, feeling it's warmth on my skin, then fell back in behind the caravan. In the back, I could hear Scratch and Night Rose talking to Da'riano, now Zirconium. They'd already begun teaching him better Equestrian.

My emotions back under control now, I turned inward to examine that packet I'd caught last night. I made sure it couldn't reach out from the quarantine I'd placed it in, then began to open it.

I found several files inside, all tagged with links for major portions of my anatomy. I deleted each one after a careful dissection of its code. It was remarkable. Each line was a perfect replica of my motion control codes, right down to the coordination matrixes. And with each code I dealt with, my worry grew. Whoever this was, they were not only brilliant, but they knew me. From hoof to main, they knew me.

When I came to the last file, my fears doubled. This file was tagged for my Particle Cannon. It was coded to fire it when a certain phrase was heard. No pony besides Night Rose, Winter Frost or Tiller had ever known about it, and I haven't been using it since discovery.

Who the fuck was this pony?

Footnote: Level Up!

New Perk: Mysterious Stranger - He wears a duster and Stetson, concealing his true identity. When using S.A.T.S., you will sometimes receive help in the form of this pistol-wielding mystery.

Bonus Perk: Red Eyes - Whenever one of your companions becomes incapacitated, you gain +50 damage, and AP refills as soon as S.A.T.S. ends. (Meaning infinite S.A.T.S. until your companion rises again)

Ch 17: The Single Step
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Fallout Equestria: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Ch 17: The Single Step

FoE: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Chapter XVII: The Single Step

"One crossed wire, one whiff of potassium sulfate, one errant twitch, and KABLEWY!" - Demoman

System Report: 0000000017
Unit Status: Active
Location: Nchi Kavu (Zebranese for Dry Land)
Satellite Signal Status: Receiver offline. GPS active.
Begin data dump to external off-site memory back-up:

- - - - - Done.
Preparing visual report: Done.

Date: --/--/2212, 200PA (+50 days activation)
Time: 0430 Local

"Heya, all you out there in the Equestrian Wasteland and beyond! This is DJ-Pon3, wrappin your pretty head in some honest to goodness truth! That's right, it's NEWS TIME!!!

"If you head east of the Everfree forest, chances are you'll run into a town called Borderlands. The zebras there are a nice enough bunch if you're not gonna cause trouble, but even if you're there to help, watch your back! They may want you to stick around for longer than you planned. Just a word to the wise, children!

"And now, a special bulletin from the Celestial Canyon! For those of you who aren't in the know, there are two tribes of zebra there that have been duking it out for as long as even they can remember. Well, guess who decided to settle things down there? That's right! It's our favorite wasteland bot, Verse! Within a day of him makin the scene, one of the tribes decided to high-tail it on out of there! Just another bit of clean-up done by our boy, Verse. Sing the praises children!"

Wet.

For a place that translated into Dry Land, Nchi Kavu was pretty damn wet. Or at least the area around it was. One big wet moat surrounding a town. My Equestrian map was useless long ago, so I'd switched to a GPS-based mapping system. I was fortunate that the satellite I'd caught last week to call DJ-Pon3 was a surveillance sat, and still had an active uplink to an old MoA data hub.

I'd also decided to play this one smart. I locked the satellite out of any other signal than what I deemed usable. Furthermore, I'd installed the same alarms I'd used back in Canterlot into the sat. If anyone came poking, I'd know about it.

The town had some decently thick walls, and looked to be manned by zebras and buffalo. The moat, however, seemed to be more dangerous. As we approached, several radigators made themselves known, crawling out of the water and growling menacingly. The caravan halted about fifty yards from the town entrance. Everypony and a zebra had their eyes on the radigators as Apple Cider called out to the town.

"Hello!! Anyone about? Caravan approaching for trade!" This call had worked in the past, when we approached a town. Normally, zebras didn't attach traders, and we'd received quite a few warm welcomes over the last seven days.

We didn't have to wait long. After a minute, a group of zebra and one very large and ornately decorated buffalo galloped towards us. All were sufficiently armed.

"Greetings," the buffalo said as they came to a halt. The radigators, seeing the buffalo, slowly returned to the moat, hissing at us. "I am Chief Fluffy Doom. Do not laugh. I will shoot you." Night Rose, luckily back with me at the end, suppressed a giggle, as did Deep Scratch. I wanted to laugh too, but I didn't want to start a fight. "What have you for trade, pony?"

"Much and little, and information as well," AC replied. Apparently he'd been here before and knew the right words, for the buffalo nodded and led the caravan inside. The town was little more than a collection of small brick and mud huts with dry sticks tied together to form a roof. The layout was more or less in the shape of a circle, with the town center literally in the center. There was green grass for about ninety-six yards outside the village, with large lush trees. Several zebra could be seen there, lounging or grazing. This town either didn't fear attack too greatly, or was confident in its defense.

As we walked into town, a glint of yellow caught my eye. I turned and thought I saw a bright yellow and very lanky Pegasus walking down another path. I blinked and looked again, but it had disappeared. I looked around, craning my neck and using my enhanced optics to see better, but it didn't reappear. If we had time, I would have to find that pony. Might learn a bit about their side from the Pegasus.

After telling the chief about Celestial Canyon and watching him trot away, AC stopped us near a large tipi-styled tent that looked like a vendor of a sort. The zebra look up and smiled. "Welcome! Welcome, pony friends! Trade at my hut never ends! If there is something specific you seek, then your friend, Wairu, will be off with a streak! Gentle-ponies, how do you do? What can my humble shop do for you?"

"Wairu," AC said happily! "Remember me?"

"Ah! My good friend AC! You've finally returned to visit me!" The zebra came out of the hut and gave the red pony a hug, which AC happily returned. "What can I do for you, my friend? Tell me; are your old troubles at an end?"

"Very nearly," AC replied. "We're on our way to Zebrion to solve the last of them. Then, it's just a matter of getting rid of a certain yellow cook." The last was said with a chuckle.

"I heard that," Chef Sandy yelled as everyone dismounted, drawing a laugh from AC and Wairu. Frieda immediately stretched her wings and took to the air. She'd been doing daily aerial reconnaissance out past my radar range, but hadn't had the chance to today. Part of me thought she'd missed it, even if it was only for a few hours.

"Not much to this place," Night Rose grumbled as she and Scratch got out. Chef and AC went inside the tent with their zebra friend, while the five of us were left to guard the wagons. "Whole place looks like a good wind would knock it over."

"It is typical of towns we've seen," Zirconium said, gazing around. "I do hope you weren't being mean. My people suffered as greatly as yours for a long time after the end of their wars."

"Yeah, nuke wars are like that, Zirc," she replied. I was glad our zebra friend hadn't minded everypony shortening his name. He, too, had taken to introducing himself by the abbreviated title when we found a town. Even he had admitted it was a mouthful to say over and over. "Neither side looks pretty in the aftermath."

"So, what're we doin here," Scratch asked, looking toward the large Tipi. "It's not like they can't tell us what's up, right?"

"I dunno," I replied. "There's something deeper than they're tellin us about this trip. Lemme find out more."

I didn't move closer to the vendor's place; I didn't need to. I enhanced my hearing and focused it on the store, filtering out zebras and buffalo conversations until I heard Chef's voice. I locked on to that and listened.

"...not sure this is a good idea."

"Of course it's a good idea," AC said. "I've waited ten years for this chance, and I'm not going to waste it." A thump. He'd stomped his hoof. "That bastard's cornered himself. It's time to move in for the kill."

"A vendetta that so long has been kept must not be something quickly leapt. If going to kill the ghouls are you, great care should you take, or be labeled a fool."

"I've already planned out how it's going to happen. The only thing I don't know is the layout."

"You can't plan a revenge kill without the layout. Otherwise, you're just daydreaming. And even you have to admit, you daydream a lot, AC."

"I do not. At least not anymore. Come on, let's get some supplies and get moving. The others are waiting." The conversation turned into shopping after that, and I stopped listening. I turned to my companions and replayed what I'd heard for them.

"A vendetta," Scratch said thoughtfully. "I was wondering why two earth ponies would just up'n decide to head out this way. I didn't think it was that personal though."

"In keeping vengeance in his heart," Zirc said, "AC has failed from the start."

"Yeah. Going in without a real plan?" Night rose shook her head.

"He's blind to any danger," I nodded. "Only cares about his target. I wonder what could have happened to put him in that sort of mindset."

AC and Chef emerged a few minutes later, carrying a box of supplies each; ammunition, food, Med-X's, and even a few stimulants. I looked at those in disgust. "Drugs," I asked, not even trying to hide the contempt.

"Never know," AC replied noncommittally. "Everyone ready?"

A chorus of yeses, and AC got us rolling again with a wave goodbye to his friend. The buffalo all waved as we left the northern exit of town. I stopped and looked back, wondering what had happened to that one Pegasus I'd seen.

Suddenly, I heard a distant roar. I turned toward the sound, only to be knocked on my side by a large creature. It had the body and head of a lioness, but the wings of a bat and a tail that would put any radscorpion to shame. Instinctively, my zebra rifle was out and in the creature's face, but before I could fire, another zebra came flying in and knocked the monster off of me. It landed against Frieda's wagon and nearly knocked it over, but for some reason it caught the wagon with her mouth and set it down on its wheels.

As I got to my feet and brought my weapon to bear, the strange zebra leapt onto the creature's back, brandishing a long lance weapon that crackled with energy. He aimed it at Night Rose, who had drawn weapon half a minute ago and was ready to take the thing down. Before I could put a burst into him (despite knocking the creature off of me, no one points a weapon at my mare-friend), I heard a cry from behind me.

"Don't shoot at her, please! Or the stupid zebra!" I turned and saw the yellow Pegasus I'd noticed earlier touching down behind me. He had a scared look in his eye, as if I was threatening his family and he could do nothing but watch.

"MEY," the zebra shouted, word muffled by the lance in his mouth. He spit it out and pointed an angry hoof at the Pegasus. "I resent that!" His rebuttal finished, he hopped off of the creature's back and retrieved his weapon. Seeing no further threat coming from the monster, I stowed my rifle and looked down at the Pegasus. He was tall, much taller than Ditzy Doo had been. Somehow he reminded me of someone, but I couldn't place who. His flank bore the head of (his?) creature, with wings and tail coming off of it, but but in it's mouth was something that looked like a roll of... was that toilet paper? The Pegasus looked up at me, seeming in awe. I'd gotten used to strange looks, but I was uncomfortable somehow with the way he looked at me.

"Are you alright,sir," he asked, suddenly looking all over my body. "I'm sorry about her. Did she hurt you?" His eyes came to rest on my front left leg. "Oh, she did! Here. I'll bandage that for you." Before I could protest he pulled a bandage roll (ok, not toilet paper) out of his tail and began wrapping my leg.

"Thanks," I said, trying to politely pull my leg away. "But that's not necessary." Ignoring me, he finished wrapping my leg. It was probably healed already, but he'd put so much effort into it, I didn't have it in me to tell him he didn't need to. I sighed and nodded thanks to him. I'm sure he would have smiled back but Chef Sandy decided that was a good time to make himself known.

"Is anyone else aware that this is a freaking manticore??"

"Her name's Celly," the Pegasus replied, trotting over to the manticore (new word for the day! Yay.) "After Princess Celestia. She's my adoptive sister. Her dad took care of us when I was a colt. I'm Sunshy Rays and this is my friend Zen." He nodded toward the zebra, who looked around somewhat nervously. Though I couldn't blame him; everyone who was armed still had their weapons trained on him and Celly. I introduced myself and my friends one by one, and noticed that AC had, at some point, dove off his wagon and was hiding behind Wairu.

"Sorry for the spear thing," Zen the zebra said to Night Rose. He'd put his weapon down for the moment, but not away.

"Not accepted," she spat back at him.

"Weapons away, everyone," I said. "No reason to get upset over... why did she attack me again?"

"Celly said she attacked you because she felt you're... unnatural." Sunshy explained as weapons reluctantly went away. Frieda looked like she didn't buy it, but she put up her rifle anyway. Night Rose stowed hers as well, but kept her glare on Zen. I would not leave those two alone together; it would end badly for the zebra.

Zen trotted over to me, and without warning, kicked a hoof hard against my leg. I winced in pain, but also heard a clang. I'd never been hit THAT hard before.

"Yep," the zebra announced, drawing yet another death-glare from my friends. "He's a robot. Explains how your gun vanished into your side." He nodded up at me and returned to his friend's side. "And he's taller than you!" Zen shouted at Sunshy, as if that was super important.

"Stop being crazy, Zen," the pegasus replied with a frown.

"It's part of my charm." Zen boasted.

"it doesn't seem to be working on them," Sunshy said, noticing the angry looks on my friends. "Just tone it back a bit."

"Fine," the zebra grumbled. "You're no fun."

"If you and your colt-friend are done assaulting us," Night Rose said, "can we leave now?"

Sunshy sputtered, his cheeks going red. "He's not... we're not... I'm not..." Zen, for his own part, looked at her blankly.

I shook my head. Clearly, there were mixed signals going around with these two. "Where are you guys headed?"

"East to the dragon lands," Sunshy replied, grateful for the topic change. "How about you?"

"Northward to Zebrion," I answered. My companions were all re-mounting their wagons, AC reluctantly and with his eyes glued to the manticore. "We have... business, with a few folks there."

"Zebrion," Zen asked, somewhat awed. "Do you guys have a deathwish???" I looked at him in surprise, as did everyone else. Even Celly seemed unnerved by his sudden outburst. "Ok, maybe you don't, but you can't go there! You'll all be killed! That place is the biggest hotbed of radiation in the wilds! You'll die of radiation sickness before you're a mile in, and that's if you're lucky!" He was almost hysterical now, and Sunshy had to put a hoof on his shoulder to calm him down.

"What's so dangerous that we'd be lucky to die of radiation," Scratch asked. Zen opened his mouth to reply, but Zirc beat him to it.

"In the land of Zebrion," he began, as if reciting a nursery rhyme, "there lives a danger long thought gone. A pestilence we zebra fear that someday may bring itself here. A miniature bug so small in size, even Vers won't see with his advanced eyes. Called the Invisible Death, it waits for someone to pass that they can infiltrate. In clouds of millions it travels about, devouring the unaware from inside out. The only warning you will get is when your heart and their teeth have met. After that it is too late. A tidy meal is now your fate."

Stunned silence met the end of his poem-like speech. Night Rose broke the silence. "You were gonna tell us about this WHEN?" Zirc smiled sheepishly and shrugged in apology.

"So, we can't go to Zebrion," AC asked with a cracked voice. "We've come all this way for nothing?"

"Looks like," Frieda replied.

"What if we had protective armor," Night Rose asked. "I have my replacement helmet..."

"It won't matter," Zen said, cutting her off. "The bugs are microbial. Even in an air-tight suit, they'd still get in and eat you." He looked at me as he continued. "And you'd probably be shorted out. They chew on wires as well as flesh."

"Great," Scratch said with a sigh. "So now what do we do?"

"The only thing that the Invisible Death," Zirc said, "cannot take to its last breath, are dragons of the days of old, their scales are strong enough to hold. Upon assaulting this hated foe, they bounce back as if from Gel-o. It is then that they are able to be seen, sparkling with the dragon's sheen. By fire now can they be destroyed and sent beyond into the void."

"We need a dragon now," Chef practically screamed, prompting AC to yell back, "Calm down!"

"A dragon," I repeated. I searched my bestiary (look! Manticores under M!) and found what was known about dragons. "Generally lazy," I said aloud, "with a partialness to gems and gold, territorial and dangerous when roused. Not many are known to be friendly to ponies if they've been born in the wild. When meeting a wild dragon, it is recommended you remain polite and offer great riches. NEVER attempt to steal a dragon's own hoard."

Sunshy gazed up at me, a confused look in his blue eyes. "That's word for word from the textbook! How did..."

"Robot," Zen said, nudging the Pegasus. "Remember?" Sunshy looked away, embarrassed. The manticore reached into its own pouches (I didn't even notice them before) and pulled out some armor. It looked like dragon scale.

"No, Celly," Sunshy told her. "You don't need to go."

"So, basically," Scratch said, tapping a hoof on her chin, "we need to be polite and rich enough to sweet-talk a dragon into helping us out. Anyone else think we're so screwed on this?"

We were oh-so screwed on this.

Footnote: Level-Up!

New Perk: Heroic - Your stature and your fame precede you wherever you go. This gives you +15% to speech and unlocks new conversation options. This bonus stacks with other speech enhancements.

Bonus Perk: Knowledgeable of Nature - You know exactly what something is as soon as you see it, as well as its weaknesses. You receive a +20% hit bonus versus wild creatures when using S.A.T.S.

Ch 18: Carry On Forward
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Fallout Equestria: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Ch 18: Carry On Forward

FoE: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Chapter XVIII: Carry On Forward
"If you want to kick the tiger in his ass, you'd better have a plan for dealing with his teeth." - Tom Clancy

System Report: 0000000018
Unit Status: Active
Location: Nchi Kavu
Satellite Signal Status: Receiver offline. GPS active.
Begin data dump to external off-site memory back-up:

- - - - - Done.
Preparing visual report: Done.

Date: --/--/2212, 200PA (+50 days activation)
Time: 1130 Local

Stumped.

"Well, now what do we do?" The question was simple, and on any other day would probably have just as simple an answer. On most days we knew what we were doing, where we were going, and what we would do when we got there (or at least a good idea). Today, Night Rose had posed an unanswerable question. And as much as I hated it, the answer was still easy.

There wasn't a damn thing we could do.

Sunshy, Zen and Celly had left not more than an hour ago, leaving us a hoof-full of gems. Much as I appreciated the gesture, and as expensive as they were (scanner totaled about eleven hundred bits for all seven), it simply wouldn't be enough to sway the heart of a dragon. Not by a long shot.

"What can we do," Scratch asked. She'd grasped the situation almost as well as I had. "Unless you personally know a dragon who's willing to work for so little reward, It's like Zen said. We're shit out of luck." That parting remark by the overly-sarcastic zebra had been quite a stinger. He'd also mentioned something about a dragon in the Everfree forest, but none of us were willing to turn back right now.

AC sat on the lead wagon with his head in his hooves. I could sympathize with him. We'd both had an objective in Zebrion; vengeance for him and a hacker for me. Now, neither of us had much chance at satisfaction. Chef Sandy patted his friend on the back comfortingly. He knew what it meant to AC getting this far. To turn back would be just short of a megaspell going off in the red and brown pony.

"Well," I said at last. No one else had any ideas. "I suggest we keep going."

"Keep going," Chef asked. "Towards certain doom? Are your wires crossed?"

"Why do people keep using that as a metaphor for crazy," I asked, trying to lighten the mood. "All it would do is give us bots a headache. But I still think we should keep going. It's a long way to Zebrion, and we don't know what's between there and here. Maybe something'll come up for us."

Having no better ideas, everyone remounted. AC sadly got his wagon moving and we headed out the northern exit. The guard there nodded to us politely as we passed. Nothing was spoken as we continued northeastward.

oOoOoOoOoOo

I was back in the lab again. I had my skin on now and looked less like a giant robot and more like a giant pony. The only thing that marred the image was the fact that my flank ports were wide open and the arms were extended. Each held something... odd. Wine in one and a bouquet of roses in the other. I was confused, but then-me was giving off an air of determination, a sense of purpose, as I walked down the narrow hallway.

I stopped in front of a closed door that had the words, "Dr. Moonshine, Programming Director, Head of Behavior" stenciled into the wood. Aww hell. We're not gonna have a big old rejection scene in my memories, are we?

I leaned down and listened for sound from in the room. If she wasn't there, then I wouldn't have to see my own reaction to being shot down by a beautiful mare, then maybe-

I heard sobbing from the other side of the door. Crap. I gently knocked on the door with one hoof, hiding the wine and roses behind me. When I didn't get a response I knocked a little harder.

"Moonshine," I called. "Are you in there?"

"Go away," was the reply, slightly garbled by tears. Then-me looked back at the wine and roses and seemed to deem it not a good time; they disappeared into my flanks. I then turned and nudged the door open slowly and peeked in.

"Moonshine, it's me," I said gently. "Can I come in?"

I saw her sitting at her desk, her head buried in her forelegs. Her body shuddered with each sob, and her mane was frazzled to the extreme. She peeked an eye out from behind her blue-legged barrier, then disappeared again, crying harder. I winced, but continued inside, pulling the door closed behind me with my tail.

"Moonshine, what's wrong," I asked. She didn't answer, but nudged a telegram-looking letter toward me. I stepped forward and began to read:

"Dear Misses Crimson Wind,

"We regret to inform you that your husband, Lt. Crimson Wind of Rainbow's Revengers, has fallen in battle. He was a good scout, staying right at the front and calling in artillery to cover the retreat of the 107th Assault Force. If it wasn't for him, several hundred ponies would not have made it behind the line of armored reinforcements coming up to rescue them. When his last call had gone out, he attempted his own evacuation, but a sniper's bullet found him, and he fell from the air.

"I wish I could tell you that he helped us end the war, but that sadly isn't the case..."

I stopped reading. I couldn't read anymore. Crimson was dead, and all Moonshine had gotten was a "Dear John" letter from the military. I felt a sorrow I did not deserve to have for her. Her pain was far worse than anything I could feel. I wanted to say I'm sorry, but the words wouldn't come.

I lowered my head and turned away, leaving her in her office and depressed that I couldn't help my only friend feel better. How could I? Short of destroying the zebra home capital... I could do that, couldn't I? It would end the war, wouldn't it? Kill the enemy leader and you win. That was the basis of every game from Chess on up, and chess was a game about war, so naturally that's how war worked. I began to trot, then gallop, and then flat out ran to the armory. I knew what I had to do.

I pulled up to the double sliding doors. The lock was electronic, I remembered, but the encryption was different. Then-me was forced to work on it for a minute. The doors opened with a whoosh, revealing a startled security pony who jumped to his feet in surprise.

"There's no weapons test on the schedule," he started to say, but light kick from my hind leg dropped him. I couldn't have anyone knowing what I was up to. I had to be quick. Within easy reach was a Mini Balefire Egg launcher and a crate of rounds. I took them all, storing the launcher in my flank. My eyes fell on an over-large chain gun in the far corner. Much as it tempted me, it would be too bulky and large for storage, so I left it where it was. I picked up several assault rifles and clips of ammo, storing them in their proper places. I was grabbing a laser rifle when alarms sounded. I looked back at the door and saw the security pony weakly standing on the alert button.

I growled angrily and ran out of the armory. There was a set of stairs upward not far away. I watched myself barrel heavily into two soldier ponies in Steel Ranger armor as I rounded a corner. One, I'm sure, didn't survive the impact.

I made my way upstairs to the roof, meeting little opposition. Looking out over the city, I was hit was a degree of awe that bordered on pure nirvana. Canterlot was beautiful. White towers rose around the city, and the main castle was visible, even with the taller buildings surrounding the research lab. The roofs of thousands of houses dotted the skyline, mixing with trees of all varieties. Then-me took it all in at a glance, then readied my flight package. I watched as then-me went over the plan.

Target: Caesar of the Zebra Empire.
Location: Zebra-lon-D'warna, translated as Paradise for Zebras.
Mission: Eradication of all life at site.

I was ready for lift-off when a voice called out to me.

"Alpha," she said. "What do you think you're doing?" I didn't need to look. Moonshine was standing at the door I'd smashed through getting up here. My head turned anyway, and I took in her emotions. Fear, worry, sadness. What was I thinking?

"I'm going to make it right," then-me replied. "I'm going to avenge Crimson Wind, and end this war." I lit my thrusters and rose into the air... only to crash back to the roof as my vision went to snow. It returned quickly, and I looked back to Moonshine. She was holding what scanned as an EMP-gun. Worse, she was aiming it at me. I tried to stand, but she pulled the trigger again, sending me sprawling and back into snow-view. When I could see again, she was standing over me, the gun to my head and tears in her eyes.

"I'm sorry," was all she said. She pulled the trigger, and then the world went white...

oOoOoOoOoOo

I woke with a yell, leaping to my feet quickly. Night Rose, having been tucked tightly against me, was thrown a few feet away, and landed with a grunt.

"What the fuck was that for," she asked, rubbing her head with a hoof. I looked around, still disoriented. The entire camp was looking at me. Had I been the only one asleep? No, I had to have woken everyone. From the blurry looks in most of their eyes, I had.

"Sorry," I said quickly, lying back down. Night Rose gave me an angry stare, then went to lay next to Scratch, who apparently was a very heavy sleeper; she hadn't even twitched in her sleep. I facehoofed, and looked around again. Grumpily, everyone went back to sleep except Frieda. Her eyes were focused on me. Embarrassed I looked away.

"Trouble with dreams," she said aloud, "is they sometimes show us stuff we'd rather not see."

"Yeah," I replied with a nod. My eyes fell on the blue form of Night Rose. Her back was to me, and was in full-angry-at-Verse mode. At least it seemed that way.

"What did you see," she asked in Gryphonic.

"I saw myself, angry for vengeance, betrayed by one I cared for," I replied. "I saw a glimpse of my past, and it made me ashamed of myself."

"We have all done things we're not proud of," the griffon responded. "The only thing we can do is accept our mistakes and move on, or don't and become consumed in self-loathing. I assume this memory was not from recent times."

I nodded. "It was from a time before the wasteland. A memory of sadness. A friend's husband had died, and I wanted to make it right, but my friend stopped me. By shooting me."

"Then there is no reason for shame," Frieda said matter-of-factly. I looked at her, puzzled. I'd almost gone out to commit genocide against a race for personal reasons. How was I not a monster? I posed the question, and to my surprise, she laughed. "You are not to blame, because that was not you. That was you-of-the-past, Verse. Some other pony who, to many here's happiness, does not exist anymore."

I was slightly dumbfounded. While it made sense, it had still been me. I'd almost gleefully picked up that launcher... the very launcher stowed in my flank now...

"I see your look, my friend," Frieda said, coming over and putting her arm around me. "You carry the very weapon of mass destruction you nearly used two hundred years ago. You're probably even thinking of getting rid of it. I say don't. While once it could have been used to end millions of lives for one pony's vengeance, now it's used to save the lives of an untold number... for justice." She nipped my ear lightly, then returned to her bedroll and resumed her night watch.

I stared at Night Rose's back, sorry I'd launched her and missing her feel against my side. I could now see she wasn't asleep. Just lying there, ignoring me. We'll see about that.

I stood and trotted over to her. Before she could protest, I picked her up by the scruff of her neck and brought her back to where we'd bedded down, her kicking at me the entire time and demanding I put her down. I did, but immediately wrapped my hooves around her and hugged her to me. Before long, her protests and struggles dwindled to nothing.

"Don't think I'm not mad at you," she grumbled. "Just because you're having emo-issues..."

"I'm not emo," I replied quietly.

"I know," she replied after a minute, snuggling back up against me. "Just don't make a habit of this."

I smiled to myself and hugged her again, kissing her cheek.

Another week passed.

No more nightmares, no more memories, no more anything from my own past. I'd told Night Rose about the dream I'd had, and she'd snorted derisively.

"Ungrateful bitch," she'd said. "I'd have been proud to claim that you'd ended a war for me."

Now we were back on the road north. Ahead was another collection of huts that, except for the lack of zebra, would have been a good sized village. I trotted ahead, telling AC to wait well away from it. Night Rose and Zirc followed me, weapons ready.

The village seemed deserted. Not even a hint of life anywhere in it. There were baskets overturned, hut doors that swung in the wind, there was even a tree in the town with a swing attached. My E.F.S. showed nothing, friendly or otherwise. It was probably not all that uncommon, but something struck me as very odd about this.

"This place gives me the creeps," Night Rose commented.

"The village here is like a ghost," Zirc, said. "The inhabitants had grabbed what they cared for most, and took it with them, running fast, as if that day might be their last."

"Do you HAVE to speak in rhyme everytime you say something," Night Rose asked, irritated.

"It's how I learned in my upbringing," the zebra replied easily. "Would you rather I was singing?"

"Spare me," she responded, ducking her head inside one of the huts. "Nothing," she said, pulling back out. "Not a damn thing."

We stood in the center of the town for a moment, just staring at how empty it was. Finally with a sigh I turned to my friends.

A shot rang out, and Zirc hit the ground with a new hole in his side, cursing in Zebranese. Night Rose dove for cover, but was struck by another round from a different direction. Her armor saved her, but the impact knocked her head over hooves. She landed in a dizzy heap.

I ran to Zirc's side and quickly dropped a healing potion for him, which he drank greedily. I then turned to look for a shooter. Seeing nothing, I switched to thermal. In the ground, all around us, were lots of heat signatures. I counted 20 total. None seemed to want to come out into the open. I brought out my chain gun and opened fire on the nearest few. My shots clanged off of what sounded like steel. Great, I thought. Not only are they out of line of sight, they're armor-protected too.

"Night Rose," I yelled. "Time to leave!"

She nodded in reply, and sent a burst of laser-fire into the dirt as I helped Zirc to his hooves. The two of us retreated back toward the caravan, still half a mile in the distance, when I heard a cry behind me. I looked back, fearing what I'd see, and my eyes found Night Rose being pinned by a zebra who'd popped out of a hole right next to her, a knife in his mouth. I quickly snapped off a shot, but wasn't fast enough to stop him plunging it into her neck.

The world seemed to slow for me. I heard a cry of anguish as I watched blood spurt from the wound. The look on Night Rose's face was horrible. Her eyes found mine as she fell, the zebra falling away from her with a hole in the side of his head. I ran to her side, shots clanging off my body, Zirc following me closely and using me for cover. The blade hadn't hit anything major, her throat was still intact, as was her spine. Zirc shoved one of my healing potions into her mouth while I injected her with a syringe of Med-X. Slowly, her wound healed. I turned back to the snipers, feeling a fire inside me.

"Zirc, get her out of here."

"I will not leave you to-" he protested but I cut him off.

"Go now," I yelled. "You won't survive what's about to happen!"

Night Rose took one look up at me, then as quickly as she could, got to her hooves and began running. Zirc gave me one last look, then followed, firing blindly behind him. I calmly strode through the maelstrom of bullets. A zebra sprung from hiding and landed on my back, but a hard buck launched him away.

I looked about me as I reached what seemed to be the center of the ambush. All were within range. I lit my thrusters and climbed a few hundred feet rapidly. Bullets reached up to stop me. I drew out the balefire egg launcher, aimed downward, and let lose three rounds in quick succession. The resulting explosion tore the guards off of pits further away, and incinerated those within the blast radius. The shockwave pulled zebra raiders from their holes and tossed them roughly about. They moved about groggily as the dust settled and I came back down to land.

I waited till they'd all regained their senses, and were staring at me fearfully. I glared back, daring them to try something. Several took a hesitant step back. With a stomp and a shout, I sent them all running. With a satisfied snort, I turned and trotted back to the caravan.

"Remind me never to piss you off," Scratch was saying to me. It was evening now, and we'd stopped in the shelter of a grove of dead trees. A good fire was burning and my companions were all laughing about the day's events. Even Night Rose joined in with a few chuckles. I would have thought. a month ago, that such a near death experience would have taken the humor from her. The wasteland works in mysterious ways.

I smiled sheepishly as I'd listened to Frieda retell the story of "the robotic wonder versus a hundred zebra bandits." She'd been in the air the moment the first shot rang out, and arrived in time to see the end results. She laughed as she exaggerated the explosions. "Two miles high," she'd said. "Completely made of fire, and bright enough to blind Celestia herself!"

I guess it was a good tale. Good enough to break Apple Cider of his own funk. He was laughing the hardest of us all. I was glad to see the depression of the past week completely gone. I was about to call it a night when I heard a howl in the darkness. Everyone was suddenly alert. I brought up my E.F.S. and thermal imaging, and began to scan around with it. Nothing presented itself immediately, but as I looked to the road, not more than a mile away, I saw the running figure of a wolf. I enhanced to bring up details and could tell it had a pack strapped to its back.

"It's a wolf," I said, and everyone seemed to relax again. I watched as the wolf angled toward us, presumably attracted to the light. It took him forty minutes to reach us, and by that time, AC, Chef, Frieda and Scratch had all gone to sleep. I stood and met the wolf at the tree line.

"Greetings, metal pony," the wolf said through panting breaths.

"Good to see you, sir," I replied. "Care to rest at our camp? You look tired."

"That I am," he replied. "I bear a note from my employer, Gawdyna Grimmfeathers. It is addressed to yourself." I nodded and led him to the camp. He withdrew the note and, upon giving it to me, curled up next to the fire and went right to sleep. Curious, Zirc and Night Rose came closer as I read it.

"Verse.

"How'd you like the idea of usin these wolves as couriers? Good call, you think? Should make it easier on my troops to get messages home or call for backup. Plus, I didn't really know what else to do with 'em. Anyway.

"Strange little spritebot wandered over to me today. Weren't spittin out the usual Red Eye 'Join me' crap. Called itself Watcher. The little thing was tellin me how he wanted to talk to you about something. Wouldn't say what though. Kinda suspicious. But I told it I'd tell you, and there ya are.

"I don't mind if Swiftpaws stays with you guys. You might need him out in the wilds. You've got all that advanced techno-crap in you, but nothing beats good old fashion gut instincts! Up to you, pal.

"Gawd."

"Who's Watcher," Night Rose asked. "And why does it want to talk to you?"

"Watcher's the guy who helped us out back in Trottingham. Remember when my wings locked?"

"As if I could forget..."

"If this Watcher wishes to speak," Zirc said in his melodic rhyming, "Why does he not just come to meet?"

"It's complicated," I replied. I activated my SATLINK and began dialing his frequency while bringing out my two-way mic. It didn't take long for him to respond.

"Hello, Verse."

"What's up, Watcher," I asked. "Got a message to call you." Night Rose and Zirc looked at each other in confusion, but stayed quiet.

"I heard what you did in the canyon. Wanted to say congrats."

"Well, thanks," I replied, slightly annoyed. He had Gawd waste time and energy to send a courier just for this? "Is that all?"

"Well... no. Not really." His tone began to weird me out. "I.. umm... I kind of need your help again."

"I already gave you a satellite," I said. "Did you lose it already?"

"No, not exactly. But I did kind of piss off the Enclave with it, and they've parked an army outside my cave."

Watcher, you idiot...

Footnote: Level Up!

New Perk: Big Gunner - By your sheer thought, your big guns lay waste to your foes! You gain +20 damage when using heavy weapons.

Bonus Perk: Intimidator - Your mere gaze freezes the hearts of your enemies. You gain +5 to strike in close combat, as well as new conversation options

New Quest: Rescue the Dragon??? - Watcher needs your help. Find out how.

Ch 19: The Catch
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Fallout Equestria: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Ch 19: The Catch

FoE: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Chapter XIX: The Catch

"Pants... And ham. Think about it." - Dax, 2Sense #88

System Report: 0000000019
Unit Status: Active
Location:
Satellite Signal Status: Receiver offline. GPS active.
Begin data dump to external off-site memory back-up:

- - - - - Done.
Preparing visual report: Done.

Date: --/--/2212, 200PA (+60 days activation)
Time: 0752 Local

Good news.

The trip back into Equestria only took us a few days.And the route we took brought us right to the base of the mountain Watcher lived in a day after. It would only be a few hours travel up the mountain now, and I'd get to meet the voice behind the bot.

Bad News.

The Enclave wasn't just outside his cave. They were everywhere. Seems something poked them in the tail-hole hard enough to get them to move. Listening to DJ-Pon3's station doesn't help at all; they've taken him off the air. He still sneaks in with reports here and there but the music's been replaced by what sounds like pre-recorded bullshit. I sent Swiftpaws to New Appleoosa to get us some news, and told him to rendezvous with us on the mountain. He knew the path up so I wasn't worried.

They claim they're here to help. So why are they attacking towns and leaving little behind? We've already seen their brand of "help." A small village a few miles into Equestria was getting shot up when we arrived. I flew up to one of the pegasi to find out what was up, but I got a laser to the face for my trouble. In the ensuing battle, we all learned a lot about the Enclave. First, their armor is damn tough, and that scorpion tail is definitely not for show. Just ask Scratch. She survived, but we ended up using our last healing pots and bandages putting her back together.

Second, they're hunting ponies they call "dashites," pegasi that have been exiled from the clouds. I had found a dead Pegasus out of armor, and had to ask one of the surviving Enclave (or at least one still able to talk) why.

"She was a fuckin Dashite," was the stallion's reply. "She deserved to be dead. Fuckin ground ponies don't know nothing." I couldn't get any more out of him, even when Night Rose'd held a gun to his head. He held his tongue all the way up to the point where she pulled the trigger. We were going to have one bitch of a fight when we got to Watcher's place.

Third was that an aerial enemy is a bitch to hit. Those suckers are agile as dragonflies. Zipping about above us made it hard to shoot accurately, but also hard to find cover. Frieda and I had gone to air to fight, but our ground-bound friends were forced to dive into houses and shops.

Last thing we learned was that I'm good on the ground in a fight, but I'm at least 20% better in the air. Maybe 30%. Also, air combat is fun! I could dive, climb and turn much faster than the pegasi could, I was better armed, and definitely better armored. I knew I could take a bullet or ten, and had even learned to ignore the pain of the impacts. But when a laser beam came my way, it was like a magical shield erected itself around my body. The hits didn't even touch my fur. I was practically a Super-pony.

We'd relieved the surviving pegasi of their weapons and power packs and left them behind after that battle. The mountain ahead loomed above us and breached the clouds. There was a path up, but it was too narrow for the wagons to use. We were going to have to leave them behind with the Brahmin.

"I really don't like the idea of just leaving our stuff here," AC commented, looking around. "It's wide open, and anypony passing could just straight-up take everything."

"It'll be fine," I replied. I hadn't scanned any life for miles around.

"Still..."

The climb wasn't arduous. A gentle slope upward was our path, and the only danger we saw the first few hundred yards was loose gravel. It was about four hundred yards up where we started to run into trouble.

Three pegasi in Enclave power armor swooped past at high speed close enough to nearly knock Scratch off the path. She screamed, and Night Rose had to grab her mane to keep her from falling over the edge. The downside of that was that they were both exposed to the pegasi's next attack.

They'd broken formation and looked to come at us one at a time. Not a smart tactic. I lined up the leader with my sniper rifle, but before I could shoot, I was hit by a rocket from my left. I fell on my right side as the second Pegasus roared past. A few "from the hip" shots drove him further away, as well as some return fire from AC and Chef. Frieda and Zirc concentrated their fire on the third Pegasus, who had tried to come in on my other side.

Night Rose and Scratch finally joined the firefight, focusing on the leader. The combined fire on the three aerial ponies forced them to retreat back above the clouds. Night Rose ran over to where I was still down.

"Are you alright," she asked, voice full of worry. "How bad is it? You're not gonna die are you??"

"No, love. It's not that bad," I said, wincing as I slowly stood. My HUD showed some internal damage, but nothing that wouldn't repair in a few hours. The worst damage was to my skin. Half of that side had been blown completely off, and metal glinted from below charred flesh and blood.

"Are you sure? It looks really bad."

"Hurts like hell," I replied as I took a few ginger steps. "But I'll live. It's mostly the skin, and that'll regrow soon enough." In truth, it was already regrowing. Bits too damaged would fall off eventually, but for the next hour or so, I'd look like a half-metal pony. Fortunately, my weapons and storage ports were undamaged.

"If they reported we're coming, we're gonna have a serious fight up there," AC said. "Still think this is a good idea?"

"No, it's a shitty idea," I replied. "But we're gonna need Watcher's help if we want to get to Zebrion. He's offering dragon armor for all of us. Theoretically, that should be enough to get us through, right Zirc?"

"It is true that the Invisible Death/cannot take a dragon's last breath. Whether it can penetrate scales though/I'm not sure who would know."

"Not exactly reassuring," Scratch said, looking over my damaged side. "You gonna be alright, Verse? You've got a wicked dent here in your plating."

"I should be."

"Still, we should rest a bit, I think."

"Good idea," Chef said. "It's about lunch time anyway. I'll make us something to eat real quick." Chef went to work with the meager supplies we'd brought with us. We weren't expecting to take a long time climbing up so we only brought a few small pots and pans, and just enough food for them all.

Night Rose kept glancing over at me as she ate. I knew she was worried, so I smiled back at her. "I'm fine, Night Rose," I insisted. "I promise."

She didn't answer, but went back to eating her soup. I looked up at the clouds and wondered what else was waiting for us there.

Three hours later, I was able to move without pain, and my side didn't have a giant hole in it. Now it had several smaller holes. I was ashamed to say it, but my skin was healing slower than I anticipated. Maybe I was damaged worse than I could tell. There was nothing I could do about it though, so I carried on. I could feel Night Rose's eyes on me the entire time.

We stopped to rest again, everypony, zebra, and griffin, tired from the constant walking. Someone suggested Frieda hover along with us, but she replied that to hover used different muscles than normal flying, and she would be just as tired either way.

Swiftpaws decided to catch up with us while we rested. His news wasn't pretty. New Appleoosa had been hit hard by the Enclave, but they'd been beaten back with help from Ditzy Doo and the Wasteland Heroine, somepony named Littlepip. The Hoof was similarly ravaged, not fairing as well but surviving. Equestria was going to hell in a hoof-basket.

It was night before we reached the top of the path. I had everyone wait a little down from the end of it while I scouted ahead.

"You be careful, metal butt," Night Rose warned, an angry, upset look in her eye. I nuzzled her reassuringly, then activated my cloaking unit.

As I figured, as soon as I turned the corner to come off of the pathway, my EFS lit up red. Lots of hostiles. I could see a gun emplacement that had (hastily) been erected, pointing at the path's end. Fortunately a bored looking Pegasus was manning it and clearly had his attention on the mare next to him. Her attention, however, was solely on the path exit.

"Come on, Cloudbreaker," he was saying. "When our shift's over, how about you and me go back to my bunk and drink some of that ground pony vodka? I had it brought up fresh for you. I know how you like the stuff." She didn't answer, doing her best to ignore him. He, on the other hoof, seemed to take her silence as encouragement. I got bored of them quickly and silently trotted past.

The next thing that caught my eye was a large floating platform. My scanner tagged it as a Raptor (how the hell does it know these things?). It looked ugly, sporting a very large array of guns, but was unimpressive compared to the beast next to it.

My scanner tagged it as an Earth Shaker. It looked like a Raptor, but instead of a launch platform on its back, there was a giant canon. Easily several feet in diameter, it looked to be a siege weapon. On the deck behind it, several rounds waited to be loaded. They were about as tall as me, and seemed to be rated to punch through a dragon. Why the hell would they need that kind of firepower?

I'm not a clever pony, but even I catch on when slapped with the bleeding obvious.

"Watcher's a damn dragon," I asked myself quietly, then told myself to shut up. There were lots of pegasi around. I was going to have to formulate a plan for this if we were going to get through it and into the cave. I eyed the canon rounds, and smiled. Oh yeah. It's all comin' together.

I sent a burst message to Night Rose, then silently hovered over to the Earth Shaker, dodging patrolling pegasi the whole way. There were lots of them on the deck, and it was difficult finding a safe landing area, but I got down quietly when most of them headed inside. I snuck up to the cannon, and was unsurprised to see three guards there. They didn't seem to be paying attention to anypony but themselves. One took out a small box of cigarettes and passed them to his friends, then lit them with a low-powered burst from his energy rifle.

Shit. They aren't gonna move. I'll have to move them. I looked around me, but found nothing I could throw. I was about to go into my inventory when I heard a clank from the other side of the deck. All four of us turned and saw a laser pistol lying where there wasn't one a minute before. The three guards chose to investigate, and I took it as my chance.

Quick as I could, I dashed over to the cannon's control board. Hacking in was easy, and I reprogrammed it to self-destruct when next fired. Too easy. I turned to leave when I heard an argument behind me. The three guards were yelling at an orange Pegasus with blue hair. His coat was the same color as my mane and tail, and his own mane and tail were a bright blue. He seemed to be younger than the guards who were berating him. Curiosity got the better of me, so I angled my ears to listen in.

"You stupid fucking foal," the first one spat. "What if this had gone off when it landed?"

"I didn't mean to..." the little one tried to say, but was cut off constantly.

"If the case on this had cracked even slightly, do you know what would have happened," the second one yelled.

I know, and..."

"BOOM! That's what fucking would have happened! Are you trying to kill us all?" The third one had a tone that said "This is hella fun" to me.

"I didn't..." He sank to his haunches.

"Maybe we should tie your wings up and toss you overboard! What'd ya say to that eh?" Number one.

"I..." Curled up.

"Fucking new guy, are you even listening?" Two.

"I..." Began to cry.

"ANSWER US!!!" Three. I grabbed that one by his neck and twisted. Hard. His neck popped sickly as his friends turned to see what had happened. I didn't give them a chance to react, bucking the second one full force in the jaw. I felt it shatter as my hoof went past it into his skull. He dropped hard. The first one was still looking on dumbly at his two dead friends when I kicked his front legs out from under him and stomped his head flat in one move. Three pegasi down. And never came out of stealth. I wasn't even breathing heavily.

The little Pegasus simply stared, traumatized. I dropped my cloak and looked down at him. He finally noticed me, and his eyes grew wider. There was fear there, but also awe.

"You... You're..."

"You're welcome," I said simply, then turned and started to walk away.

"W... wait!" I stopped, and found he was right behind me. I hadn't even heard him stand up. "Take me with you!"

"What?"

"I... I heard what you did for the ground ponies. In that one village the Dashite was hiding in." He looked down at his own hooves, embarrassed. "I'm... a sympathizer. I thought we were going down to help, but all I've heard over the radio is that we're attacking innocents. I want to help you."

"This is a very bad idea, you know," I said, my eye fixed on his. He looked up at me, lifting his head again.

"I don't care. The Enclave is run by liar ponies and winboners." Wingboners again. What did that even mean? "I Joined because I thought we were going to help, not hurt those ponies. I'm barely out of basic, but I can shoot. I promise, I won't slow you down."

I turned and stared at him, trying to judge whether this was some kind of trick. Analysis of his voice showed he was scared but not lying. But there wasn't one hundred percent truth either.

So how's that different than anyone else I know?

This is SUCH a bad idea.

Footnote: Level Up!

New Perk: Shadowstep rank II - You can sneak up on anything that has ears, and bypass any automatic defense system when stealthed. Your sneak skill gains 5 points, and an additional +30% damage bonus when attacking undetected.This stacks upon previous ranks.

Ch 20: Breaking The Line
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Fallout Equestria: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Ch 20: Breaking The Line

FoE: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Chapter XX: Breaking the Line

"Where's an out-of-control vehicle when you need one??" - Rainbow Dash

System Report: 0000000020
Unit Status: Active
Location:
Satellite Signal Status: Receiver offline. GPS active.
Begin data dump to external off-site memory back-up:

- - - - - Done.
Preparing visual report: Done.

Date: --/--/2212, 200PA (+61 days activation)
Time: 2154 Local

Okay. Maybe not as bad an idea as I'd originally thought.

For being an FNG, Cloudstep had surprisingly good access to what was considered off-limits areas. We were now aboard a Raptor, apparently named Dash's Lament. The engine compartment was very clean. Not that I had to worry about leaving tracks behind me; I was invisible and my hooves were walking on silent propulsion half an inch off the deck. I'd followed the Pegasus inside the assault craft when I'd told him what we were doing here. He insisted on helping take down at least one of the Raptors perched outside Watcher's den. Apparently, they were mad at the dragon holed up inside, but weren't too keen on going in after him.

If my scanning suite was right (and when wasn't it?), then I was looking at a Storm Runner 3500 engine. Powered by self-generated thunderclouds, it had near unlimited range unless the ship was damaged, and powered everything the ship needed to fly. The clouds trapped underneath the ship holding it aloft would dissipate if this engine went offline, and the whole thing would drop like a brick.

"So, what do we do," Cloudstep asked as I de-cloaked in the empty compartment. "Are we just gonna muck with the engine or blow it up?"

"Blow it up," I asked. "With us inside it? I didn't bring any demolition charges, kid." Truth be told, I really hadn't planned on doing much more than slowing down that Earth Shaker. Cloudstep's plan, however, had much more long-term appeal. Take out the air support and let the dragon handle the rest of the pegasi.

I liked it. It involved my friends not dying.

"You should go find yourself some armor," I continued. "Likely things are gonna get shooty here soon. Rather have you with us and not full of holes." Cloudstep nodded and, after checking the corridor, left quietly. I didn't even hear the door close, and I was watching him leave.

I turned my attention back to the engine before me. Impressive as it was, it had to be shut down. As far as I could tell, the only way to stop it was to disburse the storm cloud inside. I'd never tried but I didn't think I could buck a cloud and destroy it, and I wasn't even gonna try with one that had lightning in it. I don't think my insulators can stand up to the force of nature.

The only way I had to muck with it was electronically. The problem was that there was no program governing the engine here. I'd have to get to the bridge. Likely between me and the bridge were fifty or so pegasi, all dedicated to the cause and all willing to put holes in my hide.

Not good odds.

I waited there until Cloudstep returned, wearing officer's armor. I gave him an odd look.

"What," he asked innocently. I shook my head in disbelief. Could he have found a worse disguise?

"We need to get to the bridge," I told him, and explained that I could do nothing effective here.

"The bridge will have several ponies manning it right now," he said thoughtfully as we walked. "At least seven. Depends on if the captain is on duty, which he shouldn't be. Yet."

"Seven shouldn't be a problem for me," I replied, once again invisible.

"I'll handle it." Before I could protest, he'd opened the door to the bridge and strode on like he owned the thing. I face hoofed, and prepared to go in and rescue him. My rifle was halfway out when I heard somepony yell, "Attention on deck!"

I had to peek in. The sight that met my eyes was... well, not what I expected. I'd planned on having to de-cloak and eliminate the entire bridge as soon as I looked in. They were all sitting up straight, listening attentively.

"Time's come, ponies," Cloudstep was saying. "No turning back from here on out. If anyone's got last minute change of heart, step away from your station and off the ship." No one moved. My mouth dropped to the deck. "Verse, come on in. The bridge is secure."

I stepped in tentatively. What the hell was going on? The door slid shut behind me and I dropped my cloak, gun up and ready to fight. No one pulled a weapon, but several amazed looks and murmurs came my way, not the least of which being, "sweet Celestia," and "it's him."

"Cloudstep, what the hell is going on here?"

"Nothing much," he replied with a smile. "Just a little mass defection. This whole ship is crewed by under-cloud Dashites, from the pilots to the lowest private in the infantry. We feel exactly the same as the pegasi that got exiled and lost their cutie marks, only we were smart enough to keep it under wraps."

"And how does the captain feel about this," I asked. "Or is he in on it?" A large smile was my reply. I was about to ask why, when I pieced it together. As I've said, I'm not a clever pony, but when I catch on, I catch on hard. "You're the captain, aren't you?"

"You think this armor's just for show? And then there's the name of my boat. Dash's Lament? Hint, hint?"

"Well..."

He laughed and turned to his crew. "Warm up all weapons, prepare to break formation. Our new position is going to be between the cave and the Revenant Dusk. That Earth Shaker is not to get a shot off."

"It won't," I told him. All eyes turned to me. "I rigged the loaded shell to blow when they try to fire. I can also set it off by remote if we need to."

"That makes things easier," Cloudstep said with a nod. "I assume you have allies nearby?"

I told him the relative position of my friends on the mountain. The navigation officer noted the location on the holographic map, marked with a green dot and lettering indicating friendlies. Weapons noted the gun emplacement at the head of the path. The helm quickly plotted a course to pick them up once the operation was complete.

"Very well," Cloudstep finally said. "Primary target is the Burning Desire off our port side. Full volley, all guns. Target the propellers only; I don't want any more casualties than necessary. Once she's down, get us around the Earth Shaker as fast as possible. The Alicorn's Horn won't sit idle for long." A chorus of "aye aye's" followed, as the ponies leapt to their duties. Meanwhile, I linked to Night Rose's PipBuck. Change of plans. Don't come running when you hear the boom. We'll pick you up.

Next I called Watcher and told him to "not worry about the big, scary Raptors outside anymore. They'll be dealt with."

"Uhm..." came the reply, then, "Okay. Do I need to come out to cleanup?"

"Only if you want some fresh scrap," I replied. "We're out of here afterward. We'll draw them away."

"I can't thank you enough, Verse. What can I do in return?"

"Well, there's an issue with getting to Zebrion safely. We need a dragon."

"I know of one who can help you. He's even got a PipBuck tag. I'll let him know you're on the way. Good luck out there." The link cut and I received a text. WE?!?!?!? What we???

Just don't shoot us down when we come around, I replied. I promise, you'll love it!

"Verse, are you ready?" Cloudstep was standing next to me. Apparently they were waiting on my go-ahead. I nodded. "Alright. Comms, Execute jamming program two-two-seven-bee. Flood the airwaves and let Equestria rock."

The stallion at the communication station grinned as he plugged in a wire coming from a pouch on his belt. I turned my radio on, curious. My ears were met with a violin playing a familiar tune, then suddenly a deep bass beat started thumping my circuits. Cloudstep nodded to me, and on the beat-change, I triggered the rigged shell. The entire cannon was blown apart but the platform did not fall. All the better, I thought. Cloudstep must've thought the same thing, for he leapt to the comms and began screaming, "We're under attack! The Dragon's Roar has been damaged!" A hoof pointed to his weapons officer, and half a second later, I heard the report of cannon fire. The Raptor on our side was struck hard, their engines damaged. It began to slowly sink toward the cloud-floor as Cloudstep yelled into the mic. "Burning Desire's goin down! I can't even see them! Alicorn's Horn, report!"

His reply was confused yelling and music, then one voice got through. "This is Alicorn's Horn! We haven't been hit yet! We've got no contact with the Dragon's Roar! Where are the targets?"

"Stand by, Alicorn, we're coming to you." Cloudstep cut off the mic and ordered the pilot to execute the plan. In my head, the music blared. I was actually enjoying the tune. We pulled up next to the other Raptor as a lull hit the song. I could see pegasi on the other ship looking around frantically, and as the song picked up again, the cannon's fired.

The other Raptor wasn't so lucky this time. Hastily aimed shots penetrated the bridge as well as peppered the hull. The engines weren't even touched, but she still started to pitch forward and down. Her momentum carried her into the side of the mountain where she went up in a bright flash of released lightning. I winced. Not a good way to die.

Several ponies on the Earth Shaker platform were staring at us, surprised by our actions and astounded. We ignored them as we floated down to the path. The gun emplacement was a vacant, smoking crater. I winced again, knowing full well the reason. Sure enough, I looked down through the reinforced glass deck (and briefly marveled at how it was able to hold my weight) and saw a griffon, a wolf, a zebra, and several ponies waving at us. Cloudstep ordered them picked up while I sent Night Rose notice that they were coming down. Minutes later, we were headed back east, away from Watcher's cave.

"So, Verse," Cloudstep said to me. "What's the plan then? Where are we headed?"

"You can drop us off at the Equestrian border," I replied. "I still have a mission to complete out there."

"Drop you," he asked incredulously. "You don't want to bring us along?"

"It's not that. It's just a personal matter. I don't want to involve more of us than necessary. I don't want to endanger you or your crew."

"Well I can understand that," Cloudstep replied. "Still, what are we supposed to do now? We pretty much declared ourselves back there."

"Get into contact with a stallion named DJ-Pon3. He should be able to direct you to someone who needs you. Failing that, contact Gawdyna Grimmfeathers in New Appleoosa. Tell her I sent you."

Whatever reply he had for me died on his lips as his gaze went past me to the bulkhead door. I turned, already knowing what was waiting for me. A very angry marefriend.

"You... you..." she stuttered, not even able to put into words her anger. "A Raptor?? And you converted the entire crew?? In under twenty fucking minutes???"

"Night Rose, calm down," I said, trying in vain to soothe her. She yelled and threw herself at me, her armor's weight striking me and putting me off balance. A hoof slammed against my neck, then another.

"YOU STUPID, RISK-TAKING, THOUGHTLESS, DIRTY..." She had several more choice names for me, and each word was met with a hoof to the neck, gradually lessening in power until she was only tapping me and sobbing. "I was so worried about you!! I thought you'd come back dead when you told... told me... DON'T EVER DO THAT AGAIN!" With that, she pulled herself off of me and stormed off the bridge. I slowly got to my hooves and stared after her.

"Is she... always like that," one of the bridge crew asked timidly.

"Honestly, I thought she'd take it worse," I replied.

"What DID you tell her?"

"Watch the fireworks, I'll be in the middle of them."

The entire bridge face hoofed.

A day later, we were standing at the border to Zebrion with the Dash's Lament flying back toward Equestria. Watcher had called and given me coordinates to where his dragon friend would meet us, as well as a PipBuck ID tag. It wasn't there yet, so we setup camp to wait. The Pegasus ponies had generously given us replacement supplies, seeing as we'd forgotten to go back for our caravan. Cloudstep promised he'd take care of it.

I lay there that night with Night Rose tightly against my side. Just when I think I have you figured out, I thought to her, you still have a few surprises. She muttered something in her sleep and curled up tighter against me, pressing hard into my side. I leaned down and nibbled her ear gently, and she relaxed a bit.

Why couldn't they have put a dream scanner on me, I thought bitterly. She still won't tell me about her dreams.

"What's this dragon gonna look like," Chef Sandy asked from the other side of the campfire. He was stirring a spoon in a pot over it, the scent wafting was some kind of soup. Probably Radigator.

"Like a dragon, I suppose," Zirc replied. "Try not to look at it down your nose."

"Like I'm dumb enough to do that," Chef retorted.

"Never know, Chef," AC laughed. Remember back in San Ancoltas?"

"That was a baby dragon!"

"Who flamed your tail off. For talking like she couldn't understand you."

"A simple misunderstanding..." Chef muttered as he added some herbs to the stew.

Swiftpaws, who had been dozing next to the fire, suddenly sat upright, ears twitching. His head swiveled left then right, as if searching for something the rest of us couldn't hear. I turned on my own enhanced hearing, and caught the sound of flapping... from behind us! I leapt to my feet, waking Night Rose with the sudden motion.

"Wh.. Whut..." she muttered, looking around.

"Sounds like our ride's here finally," I told her. AC ,Chef and Zirc looked over at us, then toward the sky in different directions.

"I don't-" THUD!!! Something had landed close by.

"I hear you all need help getting into Zebrion," a deep disembodied voice said.

"What the," Scratch exclaimed, coming fully awake herself. Frieda looked around frantically.

Swiftpaws was staring northward. I flipped on my enhanced S.A.T.S. and looked his way. Green fading to yellow/white filled my vision. My jaw dropped as I looked higher.

Our dragon had arrived. Our one hundred fifty-eight foot tall dragon.

Cripes.

Footnote: Level Up!

New Perk: Friend of a Friend - You know people who know people who know people. When you're sent somewhere on a quest, you'll receive extra help in conversations.

Quest Perk: Dragonkin - You're well known to dragons now. All interactions with them will at least be non-hostile.

Side-note: FNG = Fucking New Guy..

CH 22: Loss
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Fallout Equestria: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

CH 22: Loss

FoE: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Chapter XXII: Loss

"Braved the forest, braved the stone/Braved the icy winds and fire/Braved and beat them on my own/Yet I'm helpless by the river." - Puscifer, The Humbling River

System Report: 0000000022
Unit Status: Active
Location: Zebrion
Satellite Signal Status: GPS active.
Begin data dump to external off-site memory back-up:

- - - - - Done.
Preparing visual report: Done.

Date: --/--/2212, 200PA (+65 days activation)
Time: 0243 Local

I tried not to think about it. It was just too painful. I hadn't even known him that long, but I mourned the loss as if he's been my friend for years. It wasn't his fault, either. Dragon had told him to hang on, but a pony can only grip with his hooves and teeth for so long at that angle. He fell. And the dragon spirit got him. His body continued to the ground, but his soul was taken by the ghost. No one took the loss harder than Apple Cider. None of us could.

None of us knew his best friend like he did.

We'd been flying all night, and were all tired and stressed from the close encounter with the ancient spirit dragon. Swiftpaws more than any of us. After it had past, he refused to leave Deep Scratch's side, even for food.

Unfortunately, sleep wouldn't come. Everyone seemed unable to return to unconsciousness. Maybe it was the adrenaline rush from the scare, or the fear of a repeat incident. Whatever it was, it lasted until well into the morning, when dragon descended.

"I need to rest," she explained as she landed. "Before picking you all up, I was a thousand miles to the east. Teleporting even halfway takes quite a bit of energy."

"Wait," I said. "You can teleport?"

"Of course," she replied, lowering her body down so we could use her tail as a boarding ramp. "All dragons have magic, and it works the same as your unicorns. It's different for each of us. Spike's major talent was in his flame breath. Dragon-fire will teleport any object anywhere, no matter what the distance, but Spike's dragon-fire could send living things as well."

"That's amazing," Scratch said as she hopped off Dragon's tail, Swiftpaws close behind. Dragon simply shrugged and closed her eyes as her head found dirt. Her steady breathing kicked up dust twenty feet ahead of her as she slipped into sleep. None of us could blame her.

We set up camp and Chef immediately started cooking a meal. For once, I had nothing to do. The area was secure, and, as we weren't going to sleep here except for maybe a nap, I didn't need to help with tents. So I let my eyes roam across the landscape.

It was a stark comparison against the yellowish dirt we'd grown accustomed to since leaving Equestria. Just a muddy grey and scattered trees, long dead and bereft of leaves. In the distance, I could see a small collection of buildings. Square and stout, they looked like some sort of office complex. Did zebras even need offices during, or even before, the war? I marked their location and continued my slow scan.

"Hey, metal butt," Night Rose called. I turned and saw her staring intently at me. "I know you aren't intending to go exploring without me."

I smiled. She knew me well. "We're safe here. According to Dragon, the microbes aren't active during the day. Besides, it's not like I can't handle myself."

"That ain't the issue," she replied. "The issue is whether or not you're going to leave me here, bored and alone."

Alone? I cocked an eyebrow and looked towards our friends, who were all doing their best not to giggle and failing miserably. I mentally facehoofed. "Like I would dare," I replied. Night Rose smiled and trotted to my side.

"We'll be back in a few hours," she said over her shoulder, and received a few cat-calls. Why are they called cat-calls? I hear no meowing in any of it. "Don't wait up for us."

"I'll keep some warm for you," Chef called as the jeering died down, indicating the meal he was preparing.

Night Rose winked, then turned her attention back ahead of us. I almost stepped in front of her and asked what that was all about, but then I decided to think logically about it. "We haven't had any alone time in a few weeks, have we?"

"No," she replied sweetly. "We haven't. Think we'll find some in that ruin?"

"Who knows?"

"Angry, zealous zebras, that's who!"

Night Rose fired over her cover with her beam rifle, not getting any hits but keeping their heads down as I fought with the terminal we'd found. By some stroke of dumb luck, we'd walked right into the summer home of a very large tribe of zebra who seemed to think along the same vein as their forefathers: Ponies bad, God says so, must kill.

The terminal I was hacking while simultaneously laying suppressive fire from my plasma rifle was connected to the place's security systems. If I'd read the diagnostics right in the split second I'd seen it, then the entire building's security turrets were online but inactive. All I had to do was give them targets. The problem was that, while my intrusion software was designed with zebra interfaces in mind, it couldn't make heads or tails of the system. It was as if some maniacal genius had taken their normal routines, slipped them a roofie, date-raped them, then left them in a locked room to go completely insane before birthing this maddening system.

And here I was, trying to rob the cradle by wanting in.

"Any day now," Night Rose yelled over weapons fire, a very annoyed tinge to her voice.

"If you think you can do better," I replied. "One of these days, we'll go on a date that doesn't involve bullets. That sound fun?"

"I'll buy the vino." More gunfire.

"And I'll bring a bouquet of roses as lovely a red as your- GOT IT! Duck and cover!"

From recessed panels all around us sprouted a dozen autocannon turrets, all set to eliminate anything that wasn't us. They were effective, and zebras fell or dove for better cover than they had, and unless that cover was solid concrete, there wasn't much left of them. Night Rose cheered as the cannons thundered, spitting 22mm rounds at the zebras. I had to wonder what this place was holding to warrant anti-armor rounds, or if the former occupants had just been THAT serious about security.

The guns went silent a moment later, and Night Rose left cover to check for survivors. The guns spun, tracking her briefly, but left her alone when they scanned she wasn't a target. She muttered to herself as she usually did as she went over the bodies. I, meanwhile, decided to look further into this bastardized operating system and see what was so important. In the span of a heartbeat, I had everything it had. Security codes (didn't need those anymore), accounting logs, personal notes and memos, and a detailed diagram of the building. It went HOW FAR DOWN?

"Verse." My marefriend calling my name pulled me out of my stupor. I turned my attention to her and was rewarded with the most serious face I've ever seen her make. It scared me even more than her angry face. Ignoring the cold chill that went down my spinal support, I trotted over to stand next to her and the body she stood over. "We have a survivor."

Not much of a survivor, I lamented. He'd been blown clean in half. How he was still breathing or even alive at all had to be some sort of medical miracle. He looked up at me with fiery eyes of hatred as his breaths came in ragged gasps. I could tell from a scan he wasn't going to last long.

"I'm sorry," I told him. "You left us no choice."

"Detestable filthy," he said in his own language. "You do not deserve... the mercy of life... The Moon goddess... will deliver... my... ven...gen...ce..."

"Moon Goddess," Night Rose repeated, confused. "Do they mean Luna? She's got to be dead by now."

"I wouldn't know," I replied as I closed the dead buck's eyes. "I only met her once, and she wanted me offline. If she is still alive, I don't think she'd be very happy her command wasn't followed."

"I didn't know the zebra even thought of Luna as a goddess. From what I heard, they still think she's Nightmare Moon."

"Guess some have changed their minds." I trotted past her in search of a set of stairs leading down. Rubble covered the door, but a good hard buck (by my own standards) cleared the path for us as Night Rose caught up. Together, we descended to the basement level one. More offices, so we bypassed it for the most part. Floor two and three were completely empty, but floor four had some automated defense robots. Zebras used robots too?

We fought four of them before I voiced my concerns.

"Yeah," Night Rose replied. "I'm getting the idea that this wasn't a zebra facility."

"Well, my EFS shows all clear. Wanna take a break?"

She looked at me, a sly grin on her face. Yay, emotion chip!

An hour later we were back on the move after our "rest break," both of us feeling INFINITELY better. I checked the time, and we agreed to only go down a few more floors. Didn't want the others to worry.

Floor seven was where we stopped running into security bots gone mad. It wasn't like I was conflicted about killing them, but it was getting kind of old. I mean, seriously. WHY did there have to be ten robots per level?

Bitching about it wasn't going to help, so I kept quiet as we continued. I was sort of surprised to be unable to find a single working terminal down here. A facility of this size should have more than one. It was strangely devoid of... well, really, anything technological besides the guards. It was as if they dug a deep hole, filled it with empty levels and robots and then walked away.

Yet another mystery.

We returned to the surface disappointed but satisfied. For the moment.

"You guys took long enough," AC said with a knowing grin.

I smiled back as Chef Sandy slid a bowl over to Night Rose where she plopped down. She removed most of her armor and dug in hardcore. I passed on food myself. It wasn't that I never ate. I was being mindful of our supplies. If we ran low because I ate the extra, then I'd feel like crap.

Dragon stirred, her eyes slowly coming open as Night Rose finished her meal. She seemed about to greet us when her head rocketed skyward and looked south. Within seconds, her lips curled into a growl.

"Everyone aboard," she said briskly, angrily. "Now. Leave your things, we've no time."

Without another word everyone climbed up her tail as quickly as we could. Only Chef looked back, lamenting the loss of his cookware. Dragon was in the air as soon as we were on her back. Her wings beat furiously to gain altitude, giving us a rough ride.

"Hold on," she shouted, as she suddenly made a hard turn. Everyone gripped her spines tightly, not relishing the alternative. She then dove hard, pulling out and climbing almost vertically. I couldn't see what she was dodging, but at the rate she maneuvered, it had to be a lot of them. Soon she started to level off, and we thought the worst was over.

Dragon very quickly went into another sudden turn, putting herself almost completely on her side. I heard someone grunting next to me, looked over and saw Chef next to me. His eyes met mine, full of fear, and then panic as his grip began to slip. He was just out of reach, and I could do nothing but watch as he slowly slid off of dragon's spine. His eyes were wild with fear as his teeth came to the last centimeter. They met mine just as he slid off, begging for help. So I did the only thing I could do. I let go.

We both started to fall behind and away from dragon, almost in slow motion. I oriented myself to catch the buck, but was blindsided by a massive tail as Dragon went into another rapid turn. I was sent spinning away. It took a few seconds to right myself, and another few to locate Chef. He was a hundred yards away, twenty below me. That put him almost a hundred and two yards away. Not that far.

I lit my burners and dove after him, the wind whipping my main and tail back behind me as if they were on fire. He saw me coming and turned to end up in my arms. Then, for some reason, he went ridged, then slack just as quickly. Seconds later, I caught him in my arms and pulled out of our mad dive. Dragon was far ahead of us, but had slowed to let us catch up. I landed gently and set Chef down on her scales.

"Chef," AC called, smiling widely, not noticing the problem yet. "Come on, man. Time for thanks. Get up and hug your savior." He didn't thank me. He didn't stand up and hug everyone. He didn't move in the slightest.

Not even to breathe.

"AC," I said.

"That's gratitude for ya," AC continued, ribbing his friend. "Save his life only to have him fall asleep on the ride back. Get up, already. Joke's over."

"AC," Freida said, catching on as fast as I had. "He's not..."

"Chef, get up. This... this isn't funny." AC nudged him with his nose. He didn't move.

"AC..." Scratch couldn't say anymore. None of us could.

"Chef... Chef, get up... You...you've got to get up... Chef. Chef! CHEF!" AC fell next to his friend in tears, hugging him tightly and crying his name over and over.

I could only walk away in sadness. I'd seen death before. I'd seen a young foal centuries gone and decayed. I'd seen the bones of ponies who'd turned on each other for some odd reason or another. I'd killed raiders, killed creatures, killed Hellhounds and slavers and even zombies. Death wasn't a stranger to me.

Dealing with the death of a friend was.

I slumped down to my stomach when I reached Dragon's neck. I couldn't move any further. My chest hurt as my emotion chip simulated the pain of loss. All I could do in response was lay there and silently cry. I felt someone lie down next to me and put her neck alongside mine, her head nuzzling me gently. I turned and put my forehead against Night Rose's and let everything out of me in the form of tears. I'd failed Chef Sandy. With that last look we'd given each other, I'd promised to save him. Now, he was gone. I didn't feel like I deserved to be here either.

"Death," Dragon said quietly, "is no discriminator. It doesn't care who you are, what you are, where you are, or how you got there. It only monitors your clock. When it's your time, it just does its job. No one can put off their own time or anyone else's."

I listened to her speak, still hearing AC bawling behind us. I knew for a fact what she said was right. "It doesn't make it hurt any less," I replied when I could.

"That's not Death's problem, or its fault. Nor is it yours. All you can do is remember him. That way, he lives on."

Again, the truth. I would remember him. I would remember his fine meals made from practically nothing. I'd remember his wildly charging into battle when he didn't want to. His laughter. His comradeship.

I would never forget him.

Footnote: Level Up!

New Perk: Head Math - You just keep using your fancy mathematics to muddy the issue. As punishment, you gain an extra point in Intelligence.

Ch 23: Discovery
View Online

Fallout Equestria: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Ch 23: Discovery

FoE:‭ ‬Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Chapter XXIII:‭ ‬Discovery

‭“‬Shut the fuck up,‭ ‬fat man.‭ ‬This ain‭’‬t none‭’‬a yo goddamn business.‭”‬ -‭ ‬Jules Winfield,‭ ‬Pulp Fiction

System Report:‭ ‬0000000023
Unit Status:‭ ‬Active
Location:‭ ‬Cape Unicorn,‭ ‬Zebrion
Satellite Signal Status:‭ ‬GPS active.
Begin data dump to external off-site memory back-up:
-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭
-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭
-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭
-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭
-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬-‭ ‬Done.
Preparing visual report:‭ ‬Done.

Date:‭ ‬--/--/2212,‭ ‬200PA‭ (‬+66‭ ‬days activation‭)
Time:‭ ‬0820‭ ‬Local

Cape Unicorn‭? ‬A pony city in the middle of the zebra wastes‭? ‬Anyone else‭’‬s bullshit alarm go off‭? ‬Something didn‭’‬t add up.

We‭’‬d landed around‭ ‬4‭ ‬am.‭ ‬Dragon said we were near enough our destination that we could walk the rest of the way.‭ ‬Spent some hours giving Chef Sandy a decent funeral,‭ ‬then headed on.‭ ‬AC felt kind of wrong with how quickly we were moving on,‭ ‬but he didn‭’‬t complain.‭ ‬He just hung his head as we stepped into the ruined city.‭

At first glance,‭ ‬you couldn‭’‬t tell there was a secret development facility in the city.‭ ‬It looked pretty urban,‭ ‬with some basic office buildings in the center of town.‭ ‬Dragon promised we‭’‬d be safe,‭ ‬the bugs and ghosts don‭’‬t go near the city.‭

“So,‭ ‬where is this place we‭’‬re looking for anyway,‭”‬ Scratch asked as she glanced around.‭

“This city is of pony design.‭ ‬I‭’‬m as foreign here as you with my kind.‭”‬ I thought Zirc was gonna work on his Equestrian.‭ ‬Or maybe he just didn‭’‬t trust us enough yet.‭ ‬Zebras have a weird cultural taboo about the way they speak.‭ ‬Won‭’‬t talk normally unless they know you really well.

‭“‬Verse,‭”‬ Night Rose said,‭ ‬looking at me skeptically.‭ “‬You do know where we‭’‬re going,‭ ‬right‭?”

“General direction,‭”‬ I replied.‭ “‬I‭’‬m watching a signal from the place.‭ ‬It‭’‬ll get stronger as we get closer,‭ ‬then I can pinpoint it.‭”

“So long as we know where to go,‭”‬ she said,‭ ‬glancing back at AC.‭ ‬He walked sullenly alongside Frieda,‭ ‬who tried her best to ignore his mood as she scanned the area around us.

‭“‬Think I should take to the air,‭”‬ she asked.‭ “‬Provide a little recon maybe‭?”‬ I could tell she wanted to get away from AC,‭ ‬and worse,‭ ‬so could he.‭ ‬His ears pined tightly against his head and his tail drooped even lower as he looked away,‭ ‬visibly shrinking a bit.‭

“Not right now,‭”‬ I told her.‭ ‬She looked at the effect she‭’‬d had on the red pony,‭ ‬and instantly regretted the suggestion.‭

We moved further into‭ ‬the city.‭ ‬I took point,‭ ‬keeping my focus split between the sine wave indicator on my HUD and the road ahead.‭ ‬It was‭…‬ difficult.‭ ‬The damn thing kept doing a roller coaster impression‭; ‬up then down then up then back down.‭ ‬It even did a loop.‭ ‬Never gonna explain that one.‭ ‬After about an hour of this I finally gave up watching it.‭ ‬The signal was apparently coming from everywhere.‭

A sniffing at my side brought my head down.‭ ‬Swiftpaws was nosing at the side of one of the houses.‭ ‬I was about to ask what he was‭ ‬doing when a panel of the wall shot upward.‭ ‬He yelped and jumped back next to Scratch.‭ ‬Eleven guns were suddenly pointed at the opening‭ (‬Zirc,‭ ‬Night Rose,‭ ‬Frieda and everything I had that wouldn‭’‬t kill us all on detonation.‭) ‬We stood there for a moment,‭ ‬waiting.‭ ‬When nothing emerged,‭ ‬Swiftpaws moved forward and poked his nose inside,‭ ‬sniffing furiously.‭

“I smell metal,‭”‬ he said after a few seconds.‭ “‬Smells like Verse,‭ ‬only bigger.‭ ‬Metal and plastic and something I can‭’‬t identify.‭ ‬I also smell‭…‬ death.‭”‬ All our ears perked at that as he continued.‭ “‬Rotting,‭ ‬decaying,‭ ‬but not quite dead.‭”

“So either zombies or ghouls,‭”‬ Frieda said.‭ ‬She‭’‬d taken up a protective stance in front of AC,‭ ‬who thankfully had snapped a little bit out of his sorrow for this and was watching intently.‭ “‬Either way,‭ ‬what do we do‭?”

“I‭’‬m going in,‭”‬ Night Rose said as she put her helmet on.‭ ‬She looked at me as if daring me to stop her,‭ ‬but I nodded my ascent.‭ ‬Like I could do anything to stop that mare.‭ ‬More likely be able to raise the sun and the moon.‭ ‬She nodded back and disappeared into the hole.‭ ‬To say I was tense was a bit of an understatement.

‭“‬So why aren‭’‬t you going in after her‭?”‬ I turned and looked at AC.‭ ‬It was the first thing he‭’‬d said all morning.‭ “‬Go on,‭ ‬get in there.‭”‬

I mentally bucked myself in the face,‭ ‬then dove in after her.‭ ‬It was completely dark.‭ ‬The path went downward after a few feet.‭ ‬I switched to thermals and found my marefriend a few meters ahead,‭ ‬staring down at something.‭ ‬I quick ultrasonic pulse revealed what she‭’‬d found.‭ ‬Steel Ranger armor.‭ ‬It gave a rough return,‭ ‬which meant it was rusted over.‭ ‬The design was off as well.

‭“‬Now that‭’‬s interesting,‭”‬ I said aloud.‭ ‬Night Rose jumped and nearly smacked me in the face with her rifle.‭ ‬I could tell she was scowling at me as I continued.‭ “‬This was an original model‭…‬ old style circuitry‭…‬ what‭’‬s this antique doing here‭?”

“Let‭’‬s keep going then,‭”‬ Night Rose said.‭ “‬Call the others and tell them it‭’‬s safe.‭”

“We don‭’‬t know it‭’‬s safe,‭”‬ I replied immediately.‭ “‬We‭’‬ve only gone a little way in and this tunnel could go for miles.‭”

“Well we can‭’‬t leave it unexplored.‭ ‬And we can‭’‬t split up.‭ ‬What do we do,‭ ‬then‭?”

I sighed and thought.‭ ‬We could probably separate.‭ ‬The only indication I had of life were the blue bars that marked my friends.‭ ‬But that didn‭’‬t mean squat for anything past fifty yards.‭ ‬On the other hoof,‭ ‬covering this city as one group would take too long.‭ ‬Splitting up for the moment seemed the most logical choice.‭ ‬Maybe an aerial recon,‭ ‬like Freida‭’‬d suggested.‭

“What about your signal,‭”‬ Night Rose asked,‭ ‬interrupting my thoughts.‭ “‬Is it stronger‭?”

“It‭’‬s stronger,‭”‬ I replied.‭ “‬In all directions.‭ ‬It‭’‬s like this whole city is transmitting the signal and I keep walking past emitters.‭ ‬Only reason I‭’‬m not getting a headache from it is it‭’‬s a low-fi signal.‭”

“So we could be going straight towards it,‭”‬ she said thoughtfully.

‭“‬Or we could be walking away,‭”‬ I finished with a nod.‭ ‬I told her what I‭’‬d been thinking,‭ ‬and she reluctantly agreed.‭ ‬A quick trot back to the entrance and we split into two groups.‭ ‬Frieda took to the air and acted as scout and cover for Scratch,‭ ‬AC,‭ ‬and Swiftpaws.‭ ‬Zirc followed Night Rose and myself back into the tunnel.‭ ‬Night Rose lit the lamp on her head so the zebra could see better.‭ ‬He was the‭ ‬only one in our group without enhanced sight.‭ ‬The walls were painted a sort of off-white.‭ ‬I‭’‬d heard somewhere that the color tope was supposed to be soothing.‭ ‬I wasn‭’‬t all that calmed by it.

We came to a T-intersection.‭ ‬No signs told what was in either direction.‭ ‬Night Rose and Zirc took the path to the left while Swiftpaws and I explored the right.‭

“Call if you need us,‭”‬ I said as they walked off.

‭“‬You too,‭ ‬metal butt,‭”‬ Night Rose called back,‭ ‬and I saw Zirc chuckle as he turned away.‭ ‬I shook my head and couldn‭’‬t suppress my own smile as we were dropped back into the dark.‭

I decided to try the same trick I‭’‬d used back in Trottingham,‭ ‬combining radar,‭ ‬ultrasonics and thermal imaging.‭ ‬It gave me a pretty good impression of the hall,‭ ‬but nothing else really.‭ ‬Not like I‭’‬d expected anything more than two walls,‭ ‬a ceiling and a floor.‭ ‬A little ways down,‭ ‬I found a door with an electronic lock. Swiftpawes elected to move on as I fiddled with it.‭ ‬The lock was glowing red,‭ ‬so it still had power.‭ ‬One scan later and I knew how to get in.‭ ‬I brushed my front left knee across the front of the lock,‭ ‬activating the passkey component hidden there‭ (‬I was still discovering things about myself.‭ ‬What‭’‬s next,‭ ‬a flame thrower in my ass‭? ‬I hope not.‭)

The lock cycled and clicked,‭ ‬and the pad changed to green.‭ ‬Silently,‭ ‬the door opened inward.‭ ‬It took a fraction of a second to know what was in the room.‭ ‬It was mainly empty save for a desk and a terminal.‭ ‬I trotted over to it and plugged myself in.‭ ‬Within seconds,‭ ‬I had a floor plan for this level.‭ ‬It was labeled as B-1‭ ‬of‭…‬ 99.‭ ‬Swell.

This brought back to my mind that building in the last town we‭’‬d stopped in.‭ ‬It had been deceptively deep too.‭ ‬Was this a trend for Zebrion‭? ‬Build a mysterious facility in each town to discourage an attack‭? ‬If you didn‭’‬t know you were hitting the right one,‭ ‬what was the point,‭ ‬or something like that‭? ‬Strategically,‭ ‬it made sense,‭ ‬but everything here was of pony origin.‭ ‬Zebras didn‭’‬t use this sort of technology.‭ ‬Maybe we‭’‬d wrestled it from them in the war and set up shop.‭ ‬But then,‭ ‬that didn‭’‬t make sense either.‭ ‬If you‭’‬ve got something special to work on,‭ ‬you don‭’‬t put it in a contested area.‭ ‬It‭’‬s kept in the back until it‭’‬s ready to deploy.‭

My head was starting to spin again,‭ ‬and I unplugged myself and went to catch up with the wolf.‭ ‬This terminal had nothing else in it.‭ ‬But that just brought another set of questions.‭ ‬Why was that the only thing on this thing‭? ‬And what was it doing in a room with nothing else‭?

Confound those ponies and their conspiracies.‭

Most of the rest of the floor was uninteresting.‭ ‬No signs of life,‭ ‬no threats.‭ ‬No nothing.‭ ‬After having a good look around,‭ ‬we headed back toward Night Rose and Zinc.‭ ‬They shortly appeared ahead of me,‭ ‬coming my way.‭

“This place is dull,‭”‬ Night Rose said as we met up.‭ “‬Nothing here at all.‭”

“I expected more than just gray walls,‭”‬ Zirc put in.‭ “‬I was hoping for something with more balls.‭”

“Since when did you get glory hungry,‭”‬ I asked incredulously.‭

“When one is expecting a major fight,‭ ‬to be denied it does not feel right.‭”

“Yeah,‭”‬ Night Rose said in agreement.‭ “‬I thought this was some sort of R&D site.‭ ‬Where‭’‬s the R&D‭?”

Probably‭ ‬98‭ ‬levels down,‭”‬ I replied.‭

“You‭’‬re kidding.‭”

“I wish.‭ ‬Found a floor plan listing this as‭ ‬1‭ ‬of‭ ‬99.‭”

“Brilliant,‭”‬ she said,‭ ‬and if she hadn‭’‬t had her helmet on,‭ ‬she‭’‬d probably have spit.‭ ‬Not that I could blame her.‭ “‬So now what‭?”

“I say we skip a few levels.‭ ‬This place is too big to cover all of it.‭”

“I agree,‭ ‬that would be wise.‭ ‬The building above belies its size.‭”‬ Zirc‭’‬s head suddenly whipped around.‭ ‬Instantly,‭ ‬Night‭ ‬Rose and I had weapons out and aimed in the direction he was looking.‭ ‬Unfortunately,‭ ‬he was staring at a wall.‭

“What is it,‭”‬ I asked,‭ ‬scanning intently‭ ‬. He didn‭’‬t answer immediately.‭ ‬He just stared at the wall as if it were about to attack.‭ ‬Finally,‭ ‬he shook himself.

‭“‬It is nothing,‭ ‬pay me no mind.‭ ‬We best move on and not fall behind.‭”‬ He looked expectantly at me.‭ ‬I nodded and stored my weapons,‭ ‬then led them to a set of stairs.

We‭’‬d gone down maybe thirty levels,‭ ‬stopping occasionally to check things out briefly,‭ ‬when we finally hit something new.‭ ‬Giant cables leading from one wall into another.‭ ‬The second wall was more convex‭…‬ and didn‭’‬t seem to be attached to the rest of the room.‭ ‬Exploring another room‭ ‬yielded‭ ‬no answers,‭ ‬so we‭ ‬went a few floors further down.‭ ‬The stairs opened up onto a catwalk going around a large area.‭ ‬I looked up,‭ ‬and my breath caught in my throat.

‭“‬Well,‭ ‬this is dull,‭”‬ Night Rose commented,‭ ‬still looking downward.‭ ‬“Just a big empty room with some pillars that go up‭…‬ to‭…‬” Her voice died as she looked upward,‭ ‬her lamp illuminating what I saw.‭ ‬Zinc offered a prayer in Zeebraneze,‭ ‬his eyes looking up in wonder.‭

Before us stood the biggest mechanical pony I‭’‬d ever seen.‭ ‬Its head was crested with a large spiny fin that ran down its neck.‭ ‬At its shoulders were massive‭ ‬cannons and hanging from its chin were what looked like two high-powered energy turrets.‭ ‬Further back I could see heavy‭ ‬artillery‭ ‬guns mounted on its rump,‭ ‬and what could have been a massive plasma cannon on the flank closest to us.‭

"Wow," Swiftpaws said.

“Verse,‭”‬ Night Rose said shakily.‭ ‬“Wh-wh-what is that‭??‬”

“I have no idea.‭”‬ I was furiously scanning my military index but came up blank.‭ ‬“It must‭’‬ve been made after I was.‭”

“Correct,‭”‬ a voice boomed.‭ ‬It startled us and we thought it came from everywhere.‭ ‬As‭ ‬it‭ ‬continued,‭ ‬we realized it was actually coming from the mouth of the mecha.‭ ‬“This unit was created approximately two years,‭ ‬five months,‭ ‬and ten days after your‭…‬ episode.‭ ‬It was also done in secret,‭ ‬here,‭ ‬outside of‭ ‬Princess Luna‭’‬s authority.‭”

I knew that voice.‭ ‬It couldn‭’‬t be.

The eyes of the mecha lit up,‭ ‬and I found myself looking at the degraded face of a unicorn I‭’‬d once loved.‭ ‬A unicorn who‭’‬d helped me and programmed me.

Moonshine stared back at me,‭ ‬eyes full of something I couldn‭’‬t‭ ‬place,‭ ‬but the rest of her face seemed to be all anger.‭

“Been a long time,‭ ‬Alpha,‭”‬ the ghoul said,‭ ‬hate seething through the speaker.‭ ‬“Good to see you in such good condition.‭ ‬It‭’‬ll be so much better knowing I don‭’‬t have to track down any more of your tech after I destroy you.‭”

Wait.‭ ‬What‭?

Footnote:‭ ‬New Quest‭ ‬– Stompy‭ ‬Must Die:‭ ‬Your creator has survived as a ghoul and now seems intent on ending your life.‭ ‬And she has a big-ass mech to do it with.‭ ‬Defeat her and find out why.

Author's Note

06/07/14: So I was rereading this, and i noticed I completely left out Swiftpaws in the underground area. Oops. Fixed. I'll reread the next chapter to add him in there if I have to. Again, oops.

Ch 24: Answers
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Fallout Equestria: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Ch 24: Answers

FoE: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Chapter XXIV: Answers

"That which doesn't kill me... better run pretty damn fast." - Origin lost

System Report: 0000000024
Unit Status: Active
Location: Cape Unicorn, Zebrion
Satellite Signal Status: GPS active.
Begin data dump to external off-site memory back-up:

- - - - - Done.
Preparing visual report: Done.

Date: --/--/2212, 200PA (+66 days activation)
Time: 1105 Local

A massive hoof smashed through the space I'd been occupying a mere fraction of a second before, destroying from below the catwalk I'd landed on. Night Rose and Zirc fired at the mecha from above, but didn't do much more than scratch the paint. Small arms fire versus what looked like five inch thick uranium armor doesn't usually end well for the little guy. Swiftpaws, unable to do anything else, ran for the exit. I hoped he wasn't just running away in fear, and was going to warn the other group.

I'd landed there (and subsequently moved away from there) right after the massive mecha had begun to move. It's head tracked me everywhere I went, Moonshine's eyes boring into me. And I had no frigging clue why.

"Moonshine, what the hell-" I was cut off as the hoof once again made scrap out of my hiding place, sending me into the air. I caught myself with my thrusters and hovered. "Okay whatever I did, you're clearly over-reacting. How about you calm down and we can talk?"

I have since learned that that was the exact opposite of what I should have said. With a furious yell, she slammed her hooves down on the controls. The chin turrets opened fire at me, I dodged as best I could, and what hits I did take were absorbed by my shield. My own rifles were out and shooting back, trying to disable those turrets.

"Two hundred years," she was yelling, her voice amplified through the speakers. "I've been waiting two hundred years for you!!! Two hundred years of agony! It's your fault!!! All of it!!!"

"What the hell are you talking about?" I finally took out one of the chin turrets, but the other seemed to double its firing rate. On top of that, a hatch opened on the cheek and a heavy missile launcher appeared. Oh fuck me...

All four missiles spat out of the launcher and struck me before I could react. My shields failed on the first impact, I was shoved backward from the second and third. The fourth took me out of the air and I slammed into the busted catwalk. My HUD gave me an overview of my condition and I struggled to rise. My chest had a giant dent in it, most of the skin was gone from my chest, neck and forelegs, and the hair from the area around that had been singed clean off. Internally it was superficial damage. the impacts had taken the air from my lungs. I coughed as I stood. The mecha advanced on me, its head coming down to stare at me angrily. Okay, actually it was the mare at the controls who was angry, but the mecha was pretty damn imposing.

I was angry now, but still woozy. Rounds continued to ping off its armor from above, and I distinctly heard Night Rose swear about the ineffectiveness. So long as the big bot didn't take a shot at her, I was okay with it.

I really don't think I was talking out loud, but the head turned upward and four fresh missiles shot up at my friends. They impacted the catwalk around Night Rose and Zirc, weakening it but not destroying it. Still, I heard a cry of pain come from the lightly armored zebra and another curse from my marefriend.

"Zirc's hit," I heard in my ear. "Shrapnel to the face! I don't have a healing potion!"

I yelled in anger and unloaded my chain gun into the bot's head. The 22mm rounds tore holes in the mecha's hide, exposing the jaw's gear works. I poured more fire from my rifles at those gears, hoping to do some kind of damage, but it turned back at me, taking away my shot. My target reticle swung up to the eyes and I opened fire with everything. I was more than surprised to see the rounds pinging off the glass, leaving only white scratch marks.

"You've gotta be shitting me," I yelled as I dove away from another hoof strike.

"Come back here," Moonshine screamed as I flew over her head.

"Night Rose," I yelled over the cacophony of noise. "Get Zirc out of here!"

"What about-"

"No time, damnit! Go!" She didn't respond, just stared at me. I could feel through that green visor a look of pure anger and hurt. "I don't want you guys caught in this blast!"

Nothing else was said as she caught on to what I was about to do. She scooped Zirc up onto her back like a sack of potatoes and ran for the exit. Below me, the giant pony was beginning to move, turning itself around to aim at me again. I went straight for the ceiling, knowing if my aim was even slightly off, I'd be toast same as Night Rose and Zirc would have been. I'm tough, but not indestructible.

Activating the magnets on my back, I latched myself to the ceiling, careful to make sure I had enough mobility to bring out the big guns. As the bot looked directly up at me, I took aim with the mini-egg launcher. I could see Moonshine magicking the controls. She glared back at me with nothing but hate in her eyes. I had sadness in mine.

I fired a round, then another, then one more. All impacted dead on to the mecha's face. I looked away from the glare of three nukes going off not sixty feet below me. Thank Celestia they're underpowered.

When I opened my eyes again, All I could see was smoke. I strained and enhanced my sight to cut through it, but not even my radar was getting through. So I had little warning when eight missiles barreled out of the cloud and impacted all around me. I took some damage, but not enough to kill me.

The smoke suddenly seemed to heave upward at me, and the next thing I saw was a giant metal fin and forehead poking through, followed by the rest of the head. Fucking underpowered weapon.

"You think a few fireworks is going to stop me," Moonshine yelled with a laugh. "You pathetic, over-engineered trash can!"

Right. Time to leave.

I disengaged from the ceiling and dove for the doorway. I heard a thump as I made it, and was blown partway up the stairwell by a massive explosion. I regained my feet just as another struck the wall below where I was standing, blasting half the stairs away. I looked back briefly and saw Moonshine screaming in frustration. I didn't wait for any more.

"Verse, where are you?"

I'm on my way back out now. Just a few floors to go.

"Be careful. Something's happening up here. The whole building's shaking."

Try and contact Frieda and the others. We need to get out of here.

"I will, but what about that Stitches guy?"

Fuck it, not worth getting us all wasted over it.

"Like it was a piece of cake so far..."

I was rocketing up through the stairwell, taking the steps four and five at a time. The building was shaking, and I hope to hell my idea on why wasn't true. I'd almost made it to the tunnel floor when all hell broke loose. The flight of stairs above me fell as a massive vibration went through the building. I had nowhere to dodge, so I just lowered my head and bashed it aside.

I quickly discovered that the tunnel we'd used was no longer a viable exit, having been blocked by rubble, I didn't have time to excavate, so I went up the remaining floors to the roof. A crashing sound behind me kept me moving. I hit the roof access door and immediately launched into the air, deploying my flight package as quickly as I could. I looked back in time to see two things.

Night Rose was four blocks away, taking cover in a house with Zirc. I could see that the zebra had his eyes closed tightly as blood trickled down his face. I needed to get a potion to him; I had to have one in my inventory somewhere.

The second thing was that the building I was just in collapsed completely, revealing the giant mechapony being lifted on an elevator. And all its large weapons were locking on to me. Fuck.

I bobbed and weaved as rounds shot past me. Rockets homed in on my tail but barely missed, exploding harmlessly several yards away. Moonshine had even decided to fire mortar rounds. They impacted half a mile past me. She either wasn't a very good shot or she was missing on purpose, but considering how hard she'd tried in that basement, I was more inclined to believe the former.

"You son of a bitch," she yelled. "Come back here and face your destruction!"

Okay, this was getting old real quick. I tapped my wireless access and did a search for the frequency the radio on that thing had. Locking into that, I did my magic hack-job I'm so very good at, hooked into the speakers inside the cockpit, and sent a hypersonic sound pulse into the compartment. It worked, and the mecha stopped dead in its tracks. I looked back to see that nearly every monitor had been shattered. Moonshine was on the floor crying and covering her ears. A sickly green good was leaking out of them,

"Moonshine," I said through the speakers as I came about to land on the mecha's nose. "What the hell is going on?" She looked at me through the glass, but didn't seem to hear me. I'd ruptured her eardrums. Not the effect I'd been looking for. I facehoofed, and did a quick scan of the mecha, finding the access hatch immediately.

My creator was curled up underneath the mecha's main control console, covering her head with her forelegs. She was wimpering quietly. She looked up at me and terror filled her eyes. I smiled gently. I didn't want to kill her, I just wanted answers. Motioning for her to come out, I activated of the intact monitors behind me. A quick slice and I had a way to talk to her.

"Why were you trying to kill me and my friends?"

She read the words from where she still lay curled up, and took a moment to answer. "I was... I was upset..."

"About what?"

She bit her lip and looked away before continuing. "After... after Crimson died, I thought... I thought my world was over, and all I had left was that job. But then you went rogue and tried to leave me. So I locked you away so you could never leave. I think I went crazy when I heard that Canterlot was destroyed, but I knew you'd come find me. I waited and I waited. But you never came!" She started crying now, tears falling from her cheek to the deck. I stomped a hoof lightly to get her attention.

"Canterlot wasn't destroyed. It got filled with some kind of pink cloud that killed everypony. Only zombies live there now."

"I'm so sorry," she said, burying her head in her forehooves. "I saw your beacon activate, and I had to bring you here. I was excited at first, but then you took so long getting here. I tried to get you to return, but you didn't. I thought you didn't care anymore! I went mad, and shut myself into this machine! Then you showed up and... I'm so sorry!"

I laid down next to her and gently put a foreleg around her shoulder, being careful not to break anything. I nuzzled her, then pointed toward the monitor.

"I didn't know you were here. I didn't know who you were until my memories started coming back. The only reason I reactivated at all was because a zombie shorted out the pod you put me in. It must have damaged my memory circuits too."

She didn't reply, but pushed her face to my neck and cried harder. I just laid there and let her.

"Verse," I heard in my head. "What's going on? The bot-thing stopped moving."

We're fine, Night Rose. We'll be out in a bit.

"We? Don't tell me you made a new friend..."

I was about to reply when the bot suddenly lit up again. I felt it shudder around me as it started to take a step forward.

"Silly bot," the internal speakers said. "Came running like a loyal puppy."

"What the..."

"Oh no," Moonshine said, glancing around. "He's returning the mecha to him."

"Who?" I turned her head so she could read my lips. "Who is returning it?"

"Stitches!"

"I thought you were Stiches!"

"No! He gave me a way to get you back here!"

"Well we're not going for the ride." I picked her up on my back and galloped for the still-open doorway, leaping out just as it slammed closed. I landed in the cover that Night Rose was using and quickly produced two bottles of Healing Potion. I gave one to Moonshine while helping Zirc drink the other. After a brief explanation to my marefriend, I prepared for a tongue lashing.

"Okay."

"Wait, what?" I was flabbergasted.

"I know how you are by now, so I'm not surprised you turned her to our side." She came nose to nose with me, fire in her eyes. "Just remember who's coltfriend you are around here."

"Like you'd let me..."

"Coltfriend?" We both turned to look at the ghoul pony, hearing now restored. "You mean... you and her..."

"Yep," Night Rose said with a smirk. "He's mine, I'm his, and we're ours."

"Oh. I see..." Moonshine stared at the ground, not wanting to meet our eyes. "I guess I should have seen it coming. It's been two hundred years after all..."

"Moonshine..."

"No time," Moonshine said suddenly. "We need to stop that Mega-Pony. When Stiches sees I'm not inside, he'll set it loose on the rest of the city. There are others living here!"

"Like who," Night Rose asked.

"A tribe of zebra moved here recently from the southwest. I tried to talk them into leaving, but they wouldn't listen."

Night Rose, Zirc and I all looked at each other.

"Could it be..."

"No way..."

"It is possible..."

"Deadly Hawks," we asked in unison.

"Yes," Moonshine said, amazed we knew who they were. "How do you know them?"

"We're kind of the reason they moved here," I replied. In the distance, the Mega-Pony stomped straight through a three story building, causing the rest of it to collapse. "You guys want to find cover."

Without another word, I stepped out into the street. I ignored Moonshine's protesting as Night Rose pulled her deeper into the building, Zirc following them closely, looking back at me as I anchored myself to the ground.

My chest was dented, but it still opened to reveal the focusing crystal of my particle cannon. I sent an ultrasonic pulse through it to make sure it wasn't fractured, then lined up the targeting reticle on the robot in the distance. The range finder noted the distance at three miles and climbing. I had the range, but I worried that I might catch friendlies in the way. I still didn't know where Frieda and her party were, but I didn't have time to find out. Who knew where that thing would stop? At least it was going in a straight line.

Target locked, I read on my display, and began charging the emitter for the cannon. It took all of ten seconds to come to full power. The Mega-Pony was now four miles away. That thing was bookin' it, despite the obstructions. I briefly wondered what it's speed in the open would be, then squashed those thoughts. It wasn't an upgrade, it was a wild card element that needed dealt with.

With a feral "BLARG!" I fired the cannon. Through the brilliant white, I could see the beam pierce the mecha's armored hide just above the left legs. As quickly as it had come, the beam disappeared. I wobbled a bit but used the anchors to keep steady. Ahead of me, the mech had just attempted to take another step when it's rear left leg fell off completely. I zoomed in, wanting to confirm the kill, only to realize my beam hadn't fully penetrated. It had gone deep, but not deep enough to stop it.

"Fuck me," I yelled. "What did you make that out of, Moon?" Without waiting for a reply, I reeled in my ground anchors and shakily took off after it. I had one more shot in me and I had to make it count.

Setting down a mile behind my target, I lined up again, anchored and fired. I was conscious long enough to watch it's head disappear in a fiery explosion. Black was all that followed.

oOoOoOoOoOo

"...the fuck did you do..."

"...stop him...the cost..."

My whole body felt detached and foreign. It was as if I wasn't myself anymore. Oh right. Another memory. I could hear voices at the edge of my consciousness, one sounded southern and angry, the other upset but determined. The dream-me was trying hard to wake up, to open our eyes, but they wouldn't respond. I tried rerouting power to the eyelid motor control, but it was as if I only had enough to think and hear.

"...don't care about...spent too many bits on him to fry his brain like that."

"Applejack, he went rogue... do something."

The voiced were getting clearer, and I felt a little more power come online. I tried my eyes again, but they still wouldn't budge. All I could tell was I was standing upright. I could sort of feel the rest of me, but that was all I could do.

"He didn't go rogue," a third voice chimed in. "He gave himself a mission. Look at the log, right here. He gave himself a target and an objective, and set out to complete it."

Moonshine.

"He only hurt them guards 'cause they was unlucky enough t'be in his path. An' the armory guard just had an unlucky assignment."

"Yes," another voice said, sounding haughty and slightly full of herself. "All his luck went into staying alive long enough to get to the hospital. He'll be even luckier to keep all of his memories."

"Applejack, this was a mistake from the start," another said. How many ponies were in the room? "We should have never gone against the princess."

"Hold on," yet another voice said, sounding arrogant as much as angry. I was getting an idea of who else was there. "This was your idea too, Twilight." Yep. Which meant that was Rainbow Dash. The haughty one was Rarity, most likely.

"I know, Rainbow," Twilight replied, sounding tired and upset, but not about what I'd done. My analyzer caught definite regret for something else..."And I had my reservations back then, too. This incident just confirmed my fears."

"Y'all went into this hooves first," Applejack retorted. "Just like the rest of us."

"And it was a mistake! We should have seen something like this coming when we installed that emotion chip! He's a learning A.I. Of course he was going to discover love eventually."

"Um... maybe we could... remove it... if that would be okay..." Hello Fluttershy.

"Naw, we can't. It's too deeply integrated into his systems. Pullin' it now'd be like pullin teeth from an angry gator."

"Well, what can we do then? Clearly, he's too dangerous to be let loose." Rarity. I wondered where Pinkie Pie was.

"Well, I won't destroy him, if'n that's what yer thinkin." Thanks, Applejack. You'll always be my favorite.

"The only thing we can do," Moonshine said, "is put him in stasis. We shut down his circuitry completely and wipe his memory."

"Oh! That seems a little... mean." It DOES, doesn't it?

"It's the only way to keep him intact. We'll keep him powered down until we can perfect the emotion chip's stability issue."

There was a long silence, then, "Do it."

oOoOoOoOoOo

Footnote: Level Up!

New Perk: Heavy Weapons Pony - You gain +10% critical hit when using large weapons.

Quest Complete: Stompy Must Die! - You gain an extra point in Stamina as a reward.

Ch 25: Bringing up Troubles
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Fallout Equestria: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Ch 25: Bringing up Troubles

FoE: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Chapter XXV: Bringing Up Troubles

"In a neighborhood, as in life, a clean bandage is much, much better than a raw or festering wound.” - Edward Koch

System Report: 0000000025
Unit Status: Active
Location: Cape Unicorn, Zebrion
Satellite Signal Status: GPS active.
Begin data dump to external off-site memory back-up:

- - - - - Done.
Preparing visual report: Done.

Date: --/--/2212, 200PA (+66 days activation)
Time: 1708 Local

Powering from Stand-by. Please wait...

...

Activating CPU...

Rebooting hard drives...

Initializing motor control... Error. Drives 04, 06, 14, 22, 28, 35, 56, 93, 105, 152, 254 are offline. Probability of physical damage: 97.3%.

Activating inventory sorting system...

Activating S.A.T.S...

Activating auditory/visual system...

Activating vocal system...

Activating consciousness

Unit is online.

“-should be coming online now. I fixed what I could, but he won’t be very mobile for a while.”

“But he’ll be okay if you can replace the parts right?”

“Theoretically, yes. He is a machine after all.”

“He’s MORE than that!!”

Oh goody. The girls are already getting along. I opened my eyes to the sight of Night Rose and Moonshine in the middle of an argument in the middle of what seemed to be an abandoned office. Swiftpaws was in the background, cringing behind Scratch. Zinc simply stared out the window, as did AC but with a sullen look on his face. Frieda was nowhere to be seen, probably on look-out.

“I understand that,” Moonshine replied, backing away defensively. “I’m just saying that, in theory, if we replace what he damaged, he’ll be fine.”

“And what if he isn’t fine? What then?” Night Rose was pissed. Again. Probably at me. Not that I didn’t deserve it; I’d shot two consecutive particle beam salvos at a giant mecha-pony. I was surprised anything was functioning. I started to raise my head as they continued to fight.

“Then I’ll figure something else out! I did build him, you know! I can fix him myself!”

“Can you install a sound dampener,” I asked as I brought myself onto my stomach. “You girls could wake the de-” A flying steel-armored pony slammed into me, pinning me back on the floor.

“You STUPID, IRRESPONSIBLE, IMPULSIVE, METALHEADED-” My lips cut hers off as I pulled her into a victory kiss.

“Stop yelling so much, love,” I said, then turned to Moonshine. “Can you scrounge the parts from the downed mecha?”

“Should be able to,” she replied, apparently unsurprised by my recovery. “It’ll take some time. You’ll have limited mobility until I get back.”

“How limited?” I attempted to stand as Night Rose got off of me. I was on my hooves for a grand total of half a second before my front left leg spasmed to the front, my rear right to the back, and my rear left tried to kick me in the crotch. Needless to say, I fell down in a heap.

“None whatsoever,” Moonshine finished.

“How about I just wait for you here then?”

“I’d better get to work,” she said as she turned to leave, Scratch and Swiftpaws following with empty saddlebags.

I tracked their progress via Moonshine’s Pipbuck until they were out of range, looking around the room as I did. It wasn’t anything special. Typical office setup; big main room with a few side rooms. Windows floor to ceiling, giving a good view of the street outside... how the hell had they dragged me up six floors? I understood the necessity, but... how? I way a metric ton when I’m offline!

“Exactly how did I get up here?”

“Lots of grunting, swearing and sweating is how,” Night Rose replied as she laid down next to me. “You alright?”

“Well, except for the bit where my feet spaz out when I stand up, I’m mostly functional. Few systems offline still, but they’ll come back... I hope.”

“They’d better,” Night rose said angrily. “I really don’t like the idea of you being only half strength.”

“Are you alright,” I asked. I could tell even without my vocal analysis program she was stressed out.

“I’ll manage,” she replied, then hesitated. Yep, something was bothering my mare, beyond me being out of action. When she finally spoke, it was subdued, quieter than she was normally. “Verse, I never told you why I was.. well, like I was when we first met. I think I should tell you now.”

I let her continue at her own pace. It was slow, full of hesitation, but she never stopped telling the story until the end. After she’d joined the Rangers and earned her armor, she’d gone out to a bar to celebrate. She’d met another ranger there, one thing led to alcohol, and you can guess where they ended up. Then, pregnancy. Cut to almost a year later. Thru a very convoluted series of events, said ranger was discovered to actually be a raider who’d killed a ranger and, somehow, looked enough like him that no pony knew the difference. He escaped before they could deal with him, but since he and Night Rose had been so close, she was put on trial. They found her innocent, but the commander, a known psychopath, demanded her foal be destroyed as soon as it was born. This part was hardest to hear, and even harder for her to tell. Without details, she told me how she’d been locked away until the foaling, chained up for the event, then locked away again while the final act was carried out. She could hear it’s cries all the way to the end. No pony could do anything to stop it. She was told later that a lone mare had attempted to intervene, but was stopped herself by the commander. She was punished and released from duty.

“Shortly after,” she said, ending the story, “I left the Rangers. They understood, the ones that were against the whole thing. They gave me my armor and rifle, and snuck me out of the compound. I spent years searching for the stallion that had started it all, and where you met me was where I found him.”

I had nothing to say. What the hell could I say? I simply gave her a nuzzle and laid my neck across her lovingly. I couldn’t think of anything else to do. She leaned into me, and we lay there for a while. Finally, she stood up.

“I need some fresh air, and Frieda needs a relief. She’s on the roof right now. If you need anything, call me.”

I nodded, and she disappeared out a door. With a sigh, I laid my head back down, then looked up to see a zebra standing over me.

“Your actions were quite brash. Were you in my tribe, you would take a lash.”

“I did what I had to do, Zinc,” I replied. “That thing would have gone right back to its master and then get sent Celestia knows where. I couldn’t risk it.”

Zirc tilted his head, questioningly. “Was there not another way for you to go and save the day other than trying to cook yourself from the shots you took?”

“Mini nukes barely chipped its paint. And they were the second biggest weapon I carry.” Zinc was silent at that. “There was no other option.”

“While I am not happy at your method,” he finally replied, “I know you did it for the greater good. The Deadly Hawks would have been wiped out, so I will not sit and pout.”

I had to smile at that. “So how’s AC?”

“There is nothing new to report. AC is still very out of sorts.”

“He blames me for Sandy, probably,” I replied. “Not that I can blame him.”

The zebra sat down next to me and looked at the forlorn stallion. “It was not your fault that his friend fell. He knows this fact very well. It is only the pain of losing a friend that brings down his mouth end.”

“I wish I could do something for him."

“Getting us home safe would be a good start. I hope that ghoul returns with the correct parts.”

“She will,” I said with confidence. “Moonshine was the most clever tech in Equestria once.”

Zirc looked over at me, eyebrows raised. “You do remember they days long gone? Tell me: were they nice or just plain wrong?”

“Nicer than now, even with the war on,” I replied, then began to tell him everything I could remember, from that first meeting with Luna to the day I was taken offline. Somewhere in between, AC and Frieda joined us.

I told them of a time when ponies were nicer to each other, when they didn’t try to kill each other over a bottle of Sparkle Cola. Of how, when somepony hurt or killed another, they were swiftly brought to justice and punished. I remembered so much, the data stored in my hard drives bringing up facts and figures, and answers to their occasional questions.

As night fell, Night Rose joined us and asked her own questions. For some reason, she was intent on knowing more about Big Macintosh. I had his complete service record on file, up to the day he died taking an assassin’s bullet for Princess Celestia. Up until that point, he was the highest decorated sergeant in the Equestrian Military.

Eventually, Moonshine, Scratch and Swiftpaws returned, their bags loaded down with an assortment of parts.

“I found what I could,” the unicorn ghoul said as she set her bag down. “I’m not sure about some of it, but enough to get you mobile and combat ready again.”

“Best I could hope for,” I said with a smile.

“Before I start,” she continued, “I need you to do one thing for me. Candy Mane.”

“Wha-“

Systems offline (Admin Lockdown Initiated)

Footnote: New Quest Perk: Historian – You know more about the past than any pony alive, and even more than some who were alive at the time. You gain +1 to any history-related speech roll. In addition, your tactical prowess is bolstered by history’s lessons. You gain +1 Initiative.

Author's Note

OH EM EF GE! I got a new chapter done finally! Only took, what, NINE months to get off my ass and stop procrastinating! Gezus, Wolf!

So, I’m back at it. I’m not sure how well I’ll keep this pace, but I’ll do my best to do at least some writing a day, maybe a paragraph or so. I’m HOPING my A.D.D. doesn’t keep that from happening again. I blame video games. Lots and lots of video games.

Ch 00: Prologue
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Fallout Equestria: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Ch 00: Prologue

FoE: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies
Prologue
Domo Arigato, Mister Roboto.

When you stop and think about it, androids are within our range of technology. Artificial life forms. Completely autonomous machines, thinking for themselves, acting for themselves, with little or no interaction on our part. The things they could do, the places they could go, the sights they could see would all benefit pony kind.

Sharper hearing than a Diamond Dog, keener eyes than a Gryphon, as agile as a Zebra, and the tenaciousness of a Dragon all bundled up into something as small as a pony. The applications are limitless. They could perform surgery that no doctor would even dare for fear of doing further damage. Excavation would no longer be the sole domain of the Diamond Dog or the Sand Dog. Space, once just out of our reach, could be achieved with a minimum expenditure of fuel; the android would simply need a small booster module. And our national security would be even tighter. The army could win a battle without a single drop of blood lost.

I tell you, good ponies, this is a field that needs, nay, DESERVES to be explored! With your funding and our knowhow, we could change the way Equestria does everything!

Pamphlet regarding New Technologies.

In the Twilight years of Equestria, life was good. Ponies were at the height of technology and culture. Ponies everywhere wore a Pipbuck, from the fashionable to the posh. Every home had at least a wireless uplink to a main communication system. The ponies thrived, and passed on their good fortune to almost every race on the planet.

Then the Zebras struck.

It started with a simple embargo. A hostage crisis followed, then a daring rescue. Tensions continued to mount, culminating with an attempted assassination of Princess Celestia at Shattered Hoof. From that day forward, it was no longer considered a skirmish. It was war.

In a war, the idea is to have a better weapon than your opponent. If you’ve got the bigger gun, you can back him down. The problem with Zebras is they don’t scare easily. No matter how big the guns got, the Cesar sent more troops to plug the barrel. So, ponies decided to try a new tactic.

They already used bots for menial jobs; construction and daycare were the most fielded robotic units. So it was almost painfully obvious that they could be used on the front line. The first attempts were too clunky. They couldn’t go over rough terrain, they could barely target, and with some weapons, when they fired they were overbalanced and fell. The Minstry of Wartime Technologies decided to ask for help from the other ministries, taking assistance mainly from the Ministry of Arcane Science. Together they designed, built and tested a fieldable robotic warrior.

For a time, the new bot did well. But their range was too limited, and often they couldn’t capitalize on a victory fast enough for it to matter. So they brought in the Ministry of Awesome. From that corner came better parts, more advanced programming, and newer designs. The results were very good, but the Ministry Mares weren’t completely happy. Not only that, the cost of these robots was getting to be impractical. Some even cost lives, taking the brain of a living pony and inserting it into a metal machine. Princess Luna, having taken over for her sister after the assassination attempt, decided to end the soldier bot programs. With reluctance, the bots came off the front lines. The MoWT’s Ministry Mare ended nearly every project they had concerning autonomous combatants in Military settings, save for one.

This one final project was to be a combined effort from all six ministries; Wartime Tech, Awesome, Arcane Science, Image, Morale, and Peace. Each ministry contributed to the programming, each lent a hoof to construction cost, and each had a say in design. But none had a voice in purpose louder than MoWT. Applejack had a specific reason for this last bot, though none of her friends knew it. Maybe Twilight could have guessed, but in the end it didn’t matter. The Zebras used the ultimate card. Balefire bombs struck key locations. Cloudsdale disappeared, sending the Pegasi into mass mourning and closing up the sky. Everywhere else, ponies ran for the shelter of Stable-Tec’s safety. Some made it, others didn’t get close.

Now its two hundred years later, children. Two Hundred Years. The bots that are running around now are all crazy. They can’t be reasoned with, bought, bribed or begged. They only exist for one reason: Kill Ponies. They’re all carrying out their last orders. Most are just continuing security where they were stationed.

Who’s to blame, children? Applejack? The Zebras? Luna? Who do we point the hoof at and say “These insane robots are your fault?” The answer, children, is no one. No one is at fault here. So we all just go on killing robots when we must, reprogramming them when we can, avoiding them when we can’t do either. We ignore them, they ignore us.
But for one robot, that doesn’t hold true. There’s one bot out there who doesn’t want to do any of that. One robot who wants to make a difference for the Equestrian Wasteland.

This, children, is his story.

Ch 01: Startup
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Fallout Equestria: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Ch 01: Startup

FoE: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Chapter I: Start-Up

Maybe next time you’ll take a second look/And not judge the cover of a book.” - Zecora

System Report: 0000000001
Unit Status: Active
Location: Canterlot, MoW Weapons Research Facility
(Exact Location Unknown: Satellite Signal Error, GPS Offline)
Begin data dump to external off-site memory back-up:

- - - - - Done.
Preparing visual report: Done.
Date: Unknown
Time: Unknown

Online.

The first thing my hard drives recorded was the boot-up sequence. Power, motor controls, Eyes Forward Sparkle, various system status indicators, all the basics. My logic processor was the last thing to be activated. Instantly I knew my designation, model number, serial, and manufacturer. I was, for all intents and purposes, a model 8300 Ministry of Wartime Technologies Advanced Infiltration Bot Prototype, serial number 0001.

My visual receptors came online within milliseconds of system green light. I stepped out of the maintenance pod and took my first look around. The room was empty. It wasn’t barren; the walls were lined with various processing banks and wires, some of which connected to my pod. In that first second of existence, I had several thousand thoughts and processes go through me. I auto-mapped the room, used my radar to scan my surroundings, located a weapons locker, located the building exit and plotted a course to get there. Other processes were automatic, and therefore, are omitted here to save time.

My focus fell on a desk with a terminal, situated to face the only set of double doors the room had. The terminal glowed a sickly green and lit the top of the desk well. There was a clipboard and an empty coffee mug next to it. I trotted over and plugged myself in, ignoring the rest of the desk for the moment. Access to the main system was surprisingly easy, given what I knew of this company, and how closely they guarded their secrets. Within two seconds of plugging in, I had access to every data file and working security camera in the building. I downloaded everything I felt relevant, and took a few moments to process it all.

It seemed I’d found a history of the company, dating back from foundation to the fall of the Balefire Bombs. It was all cataloged and stored on my memory in twenty seconds, processed in ten, and analyzed in twelve. The history lesson over, I moved on to files pertaining to my own manufacture. I had blueprints, circuit schematics, and various other technical notes about every step of my creation, conception to completion. It was during the nanoseconds I was reading this that a thought occurred to me. I was the single most advanced robot in existence. The first one ever built with an AI core processor, or at least the first with full autonomous thought and will. They had even given me an emotion chip. I was the pinnacle of pony technology. I had abilities from all three races of pony kind, the best that made them all.

So why had they not activated me?

My completion date was marked a full six years before this facility went offline. During that time, I had never been given a full start-up. I’d only been partially activated to do various tests and research. If I was conscious of any of it, they had wiped my memory banks clean before putting me in the pod again. What were they afraid of?

Further reading brought up something labeled “Classified” and did not elaborate further than that. The only thing I could find was it was an experimental weapon system built into my chassis. The files and specs on it had all been erased, copied over, or formatted. There was nothing left to tell me what I had inside me.

I spent a few more cycles searching for an explanation, but came up empty. With an electronic sigh, I unplugged and made my way to the armory. The history files had said this was a weapons development station during a time of war, so logically there should be weapons. The only risk was if a survivor of the attacks had found and looted the building, but it was only a small risk. The entire place had gone into lockdown the minute the bombs began falling.

As expected, the armory was sealed and didn’t look like it had been tampered with. Scratches on the door, however, indicated somepony had tried to get in. Dried blood stains and a skeleton told me he had been caught and killed. By who was unknown. I took a cycle and searched the history files for reports of a rebellion or any internal strife, but found nothing. That meant that whatever happened to this pony had never been recorded, which begged the question “why”. I set that to the back of my mind and focused on accessing the lock.

It was a remote link system, and was fortunately still under power. My infiltration program kicked in and began a rapid back and forth with the security system. None of my downloaded files held any security codes, so I resorted to hacking it. Seconds ticked by as I exchanged forged handshake protocols and faked pass codes, most of which were rejected. Finally, I found the correct code and disengaged the lock. With a smug satisfaction that surprised me, I stepped thru the now open doors.

The scene was something out of a horror film. Skeletons and decayed bodies littered the floor. A unicorn skull was stuck to the ceiling, its horn embedded in the duracrete that encased the room. A Pegasus lying minus a wing, the appendage lying a few feet away. Piles of pink and green ash were scattered about, indicating energy weapon usage. In the back, I found the decomposed body of a young pony, its sex indistinguishable from the decay. It was wrapped around an energy pistol, apparently clutching it for all it was worth.

A new feeling surged through me from my emotion chip. Sadness. No, not sadness. This was an even greater emotion. Despair maybe? I don’t know. I had so little experience with emotions. Robots did not have emotions. Nothing in my files gave even a hint on why I felt this way, but I knew. My leg servos seemed to give out and I dropped to my knees. I heard a sound as I landed with a clanking, and interpreted it to be that somepony was crying. A nanosecond of a scan told me the room was empty save for myself. The only logical explanation was that I was crying, or rather, sobbing. I had no tear ducts to cry from, but still I was sad for the child. It must have been so scared and alone. It had watched whatever had happened in here, and had survived when the rest hadn’t, only to die of starvation sometime later.

I briefly wondered why it was in here and where its mother had fallen. With no way to find out, I rose to my hooves and turned away, leaving the pistol with the body. Rest in peace, child, I thought as I returned to my task, my sobs continuing to echo in the duracrete room.

I spent some time searching the room, my internal systems telling me which weapons I was compatible with and which ones I could not use. Most of that time I used to calm myself down. There was a great wealth of arsenal here, but it seemed most was conventional. I found shotguns, rifles, automatic pistols, a few energy weapons of various sizes, but nothing out of the ordinary. I decided to take only a few things from this room and hit the large safe my map indicated was downstairs. Perhaps I could find something better down there.

I had no idea what I would be encountering in the aftermath of a balefire attack, so I selected a combat shotgun, a 10mm pistol, something labeled a Zebra Assault Rifle, and a mini chain gun. Attaching and integrating these weapons into my chassis was simple enough; I had seven ports for small to medium weapons, and two for large weapons. The chain gun fit snugly into one of those, and the other weapons found a home elsewhere. I grabbed what ammunition I could find and walked out of the room.

As I made my way down to the basement, I began to think a few “random” thoughts about who and what I was. The first was that I was much larger than the average pony, even larger than a draft pony, but not quite the size of an alicorn. My system indicated my hooves doubled as exhaust ports for mini turbojet engines, and I had a stowed wing pack on my back. The specs said I had a flight range of 200 miles.

My power source was apparently a converted balefire egg. I was shocked for a moment when I scanned this tidbit of information, but relieved when I discovered that, if damaged or destroyed, it would not detonate. There were magical safeties and failsafe countermeasures that ensured it would go dormant should I cease to function. Relief washed over me (yet another new emotion, but I guess since I’d just been activated that all emotions were new to me) and I smiled to myself. At least I wouldn’t kill anyone by exploding.

My body was covered in a soft gray coat with streaks of blue in a camouflage pattern. I had a mane and tail made up of ultra-thin wires and microfibers, all colored orange with blue ends. They disguised quite a few electronic interface ports. Firewire, Ethernet, basic telephone input, and my wireless transmitter were embedded behind my mane at the back of my head. I wasn’t sure if I would use any of that, but was glad to know I could if I needed to.

Walking down the last corridor to the safe brought another question. What year was it? All records from the files stopped the day of the attack. The state of the armory told me I was years after that event, but I didn’t know how long after the bombing that was. I could be quite a few hundred years into the future. The building itself seemed run-down, giving further proof of the hypothesis. I guessed I would find out sooner or later.

The safe, I discovered, was actually a Stable-Tec stable. It seemed to be sealed and had power. I trotted over to the control for the door and nosed the switch to “open.” With a shriek, the doors were pulled back and inward. I activated my headlight and peered into the darkness inside. My E.F.S. didn’t indicate anything dangerous ahead, but neither did it indicate anything living either. Its range was limited to a radius of 45.72 meters, or 50 yards.

I stepped into the dark portal, scanning for anything that could be a light switch on the wall. I found it up a half flight of stairs that led to a platform. Nosing it on, I found yet another grisly sight. More bodies. These were not as decayed as the ones before, seeming to have expired within the last few decades. A closer inspection revealed bite marks and missing chunks of flesh. What the hell?

I didn’t puzzle over this long. I still had a mission to retrieve any weapons inside the stable. I’m not sure what was driving me to seek out the technology that may or may not be buried down there, but I followed it willingly. I was glad to have a purpose, even if it was temporary. So far, I hadn’t found anything that told me what I was supposed to do with my new-found consciousness. What I did know was I needed to do something.

Stepping through a door at the back of the room led me down another flight of stairs into what seemed to be a common room. My files indicated that Stable-Tec stables were meant to keep ponies alive for hundreds of generations, sustaining them for up to a thousand years. The records of this one were that it was fully functional, classified a “control” stable. So I was not expecting what I saw next.

Four ponies stood over a fifth, occasionally reaching down to touch it. I couldn’t tell exactly what they were doing, so I magnified my vision and activated my audio boosters. My ears were treated to the sound of chewing and ripping of flesh, my eyes watched them tear meat off the body on the floor with ultra-high definition. I felt sickened. How could ponies do this? I focused on one of the feasting ponies and saw that it no longer looked like a pony.

The creature was missing flesh in various places. I could see its ribs and what was left of its internal organs through one of these holes. Its eyes were the same green glow as the monitor upstairs, but they were blank and pupil-less. A cold realization came over me that these were irradiated ponies. Zombies.

An automatic subroutine kicked in and I activated my Stable-Tec Arcane Targeting Spell, or S.A.T.S. I locked onto the closest zombie, selected the zebra rifle, and fired a three-round burst into the back of its head. In the slow-motion euphoria of the spell, I watched all three rounds impact, pulping the head and setting the body on fire. A quick check on the weapon’s statistics told me the ammunition was not magically enhanced itself, but by the weapon. The assault rifle turned the bullets into incendiary rounds. Cool.

I left S.A.T.S. as the other three ponies turned and spotted me. As one, the let out a howl and charged. For being undead, they were surprisingly quick, crossing the expanse of the common room in seconds. My rifle set two of them on fire but didn’t slow them much, so I toggled the chain gun mounting. In half a second my rifle was stowed and hidden in my body, while simultaneously the chain gun was revealed from my right flank. I unleashed a thirty second burst into the galloping monsters, catching them all in the hail of bullets and shredding their bodies. Two fell to the floor dead. The third lost two of his legs and his lower jaw, but still he kept coming, dragging himself across the floor. He could no longer roar or growl at me, but an enraged moaning sound still came from his throat. I triggered my pistol and put the final round of the fight directly between his eyes, silencing him at last.

Stowing my weapons, I stepped over the mutilated bodies, scanning them briefly for anything of use. Finding nothing, I trotted over to the one they were eating. It was another zombie, and it was still alive. I discovered this when it suddenly lunged at me from the floor, its jaws clamping down on one of my forelegs. My systems registered the strike, and I felt the teeth break the artificial skin.

I discovered in that moment yet another innovation from the good ponies at MoWT: a Pain Reception Center. I cried out at the new sensation from my foreleg and yanked back reflexively. The sudden jerk broke the teeth in the zombie’s muzzle, but still it came at me, unable to get up yet lunging at me nonetheless. I pulled my pistol yet again and ended its suffering.
An inner program began to run in my body. A mixture of proteins and nutrients was created somewhere inside me and pumped down to the breaks in my skin. In seconds the damage was repaired and the pain nullified. I watched in amazement. The more I learned about myself, the more I figured that they were building less a weapons platform and more an artificial life form. Very interesting.

Getting myself back on mission, I made my way through the stable to the lower areas. I discovered what was labeled the Overmare’s office. A terminal on the desk gave me access to the lock on what was labeled “S.W.R.C.” A waypoint marker appeared on my E.F.S., and I followed it down to the bottom floor. I found more zombies on the way, and dispatched them with little difficulty. One had been carrying a strange key. It was round and hollow on one end with a small square peg sticking out, and had green plastic on the other end. I stored this away for later.

The room I was led to was, predictably, locked. I could detect no signal from a security device, and couldn’t see an access panel anywhere near it. The only thing I found was a small, raised surface with a cut-out ring. The ring had a small square hold on the bottom of it. I compared the size and shape to the key I’d found and sure enough, they were the same size. A strip of green across the top of the key port confirmed I had a match, and the door was opened shortly after.

I had hit the jackpot. There were weapons of all shapes, sizes and makes inside. My initial scan of the room revealed everything from more zebra rifles to a mini-balefire egg launcher. That I took and attached to my other heavy port, stored away in my left flank safely. I also found what was labeled as a Plasma Rifle. It looked like a laser rifle, but had glowing green coils around the muzzle of the gun. It was also larger and thicker. I attached it to a medium port and stowed it, then looked around for anything else interesting.

A very long barreled rifle rested in the corner, almost as if it was casually placed there by somepony who would return for it soon. It identified as a .50 Anti-Vehicle Sniper rifle. Rated at a two mile range, the ammunition was imbued with a magical force strong enough to break through two-inch thick steel armor and a 100X scope to guarantee accuracy. The author of the stat file had probably gushed about it as he wrote it. He had gone on to promise that the weapon would greatly lower the casualty rate of infantry versus all but the heaviest Zebra assault craft.

My initial worry was that it wouldn’t fit in my last medium port, but to my surprise, as soon as it was attached, the barrel folded itself up next to the main assembly and tucked itself away with no difficulty. Those MoW scientists had thought of everything.

Taking one last look around after securing plenty of ammunition for all of my new weapons (I found a crate of mini-balefire eggs and stuffed as many as I could into my inventory), I closed and locked the room, securing the key in one of the deepest compartments I had. I could use this stable as a base of operations, if need be.

I backtracked to the stable entrance and closed the doors, sealing them with a twenty-eight bit encryption. Only somepony extremely insane would try to crack it. I rigged the controls to lock up after three wrong attempts and entered a personal code that would send out a signal the next time it was used by anypony other than myself. By Luna, I loved my spyware.
I found myself shortly after staring at the main entrance to the building. I knew I had to go out through these doors, but something held me back. Yet another feeling from my emotion chip stayed my hooves. Apprehension. Nervousness. Fear of what I would find on the outside. I knew I could be hurt, however artificial the pain was. I knew it was foolish to be afraid of pain, but I was nonetheless. And there could be all sorts of harm just beyond those doors.

I shook my head violently, trying to get rid of these feelings. Apparently, my emotion chip didn’t have an off-switch. Lovely. I steeled my nerves and strode to the door. A hoof on the handle, I took a deep breath (I could breathe?), and pushed, stepping out into the world at large.

Footnote: Level up!

New Perk: “Awareness – It Was Under E!” Rank 1 – Your scanners have catalogued quite a few things and can find what you’re looking for very quickly. You gain an additional 10% to Perception. Additionally, you locate items in your inventory in half the time.

Ch 09: Feelings
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Fallout Equestria: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Ch 09: Feelings

FoE: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Chapter IX: Feelings

"I'll be looking at the moon/But I'll be… seeing you…" – Billie Holiday, I'll Be Seeing You.

System Report: 0000000009
Unit Status: Active
Location: New Appleoosa
Satellite Signal Status: Orders Received. Timer activated.
Begin data dump to external off-site memory back-up:

- - - - - Done.
Preparing visual report: Done.

Date: --/--/2212, 200PA (+16 days activation)
Time: 1540 Local

Sleep.

I was asleep again. Or, rather, as close as I could come to it. I was back in the lab. Moonshine was with me, but we weren't in a testing room. It was the cafeteria. Why were we there? I didn't need to eat. Were they testing a new system they'd decided not to install for a power source? I didn't get an immediate answer. Moonshine was speaking.

"And so we've had to push back flight tests until next Friday. I still can't believe they haven't finished the field yet." She was eating a green salad with a ranch dressing and had a bottle of what smelled like soda. The label was turned away from me, so I couldn't be sure.

"This unit understands the need for delay," I heard myself say. "It would be inadvisable to proceed in a format that was not completely controlled, or the results would be eschewed by Ministry Mare Applejack."

"While I fully agree, I wish they wouldn't take their time in the construction phase."

"It would be unwise to rush them, as the results would be faulty."

"You just said that," Moonshine replied, taking a bite of her salad. She chewed for a few minutes, then swallowed, before continuing. "All I'm saying is, we're all getting antsy. We want to see you at your fullest. This ban Princess Luna put on bots slows things down considerably."

"If this unit is illegal, why do you continue to build it?"

"I hate to see something so beautiful go unfinished," she said with a smirk. I detected the humor, but the then-me didn't react to it. I must've not had my emotion chip yet. I stared blankly at her. "But the real reason is because the ministry mares all think you'll be the deciding factor for the end result of this war."

"This unit is curious," I said, but Moonshine lifted a hoof to stop me.

"That's another thing. Stop saying 'This unit.' You have a name." I did? I do?

"This unit is… uncomfortable… with its given designation." Uncomfortable. So I did have my chip. I just didn't get humor.

"There's nothing wrong with your name," Moonshine insisted, putting a hoof on mine. The spark of her touch set off then-me's emotion chip, and I felt the sudden anxiousness course through me, up my leg and into my chest. Then-me didn't say anything, just continued to look down at his/my hooves. She was definitely special to me, even in the early days of my programming.

"This unit does not agree. This unit will not refer to itself by that designation." Ok now I had to know. The desire was overwhelming, and, sadly, would go unfulfilled this time.

"Well, will you at least say 'I' instead of 'This unit?'"

"This unit," I started to say, but stopped myself. "I... will attempt to do so."

"Good," Moonshine said, taking her hoof back. I longed for its return. "I, me, my. Those are all personal references, and you should learn to use them."

"I will try," I said. She nodded, then gestured for me to continue. "I am curious. All the Zebras are keeping from us is coal, correct? Why could we not find an alternative fuel source? The Balefire Egg could generate enough power for the city of Appleoosa for decades, by my calculations. What is so important about coal?"

"Your power supply could do that," Moonshine replied, picking up her soda bottle (Sparkle Cola RAD) and taking a drink before proceeding. "But the dangers in using such an unstable power source are too great. While one could power Appleoosa as you said, it could also destroy it should something go wrong. A quick flash and several hundred thousand ponies, griffons, and young dragons would cease to exist."

"There are safeties governing my egg," I said.

"Which are only barely being tested on you," she countered. "They've not been proven for long-term."

"Still," I persisted. "Even without the eggs, there are other burnable sources."

"None that burn as hot, nor as long. Celestia would never allow the damming of rivers. Wood comes from forests, and the princesses are both adamant about deforestation. It would take all of the Everfree Forest to power Ponyville for six months. I wish that town hadn't grown so big."

"So we are to continue the war until… when?"

"I don't know," she replied with a sigh. "Believe me, your arguments have been brought before the princesses before. They've thought them over, but in the end none were viable enough. We need that coal."

"I just think it is very… Foolish."

"You're not the only one…"

oOoOoOo

My eyes came open slowly, reluctant to leave the sight of the blue mare. But as they did, they fell on another blue mare. Minus the horn, Night Rose could pass for the spitting image of Moonshine. I smiled at that thought.

She stirred a bit, seeming to wake up. I picked my head off of the bed and looked out the window. My internal clock and the sky outside said it was mid-afternoon. Night Rose yawned and stretched out on the bed, then looked over at me. I didn't move; for some reason I was real nervous about her seeing me. What if she found out I was watching her? What if she learned I thought she looked like Moonshine? Where the hell were these fears coming from??

"Morning," she said, clopping a hoof on my head with a thunk. I winced as she walked past me and into the bathroom. What the hay was that for? I stood up and planted myself in front of the door out of the hotel room. I would have answers.

"We need to talk," I said as she emerged again.

"Too early," she said, trying to deflect, but I stood firm.

"It's three-forty-five in the afternoon. That excuse doesn't fly. I have questions."

"And you think you'll get answers, metal butt?" She gave me a hard (but still tired looking) stare. Why, oh why, did I always pick the time after she'd just woken up to do stuff like this?

"That, or no one goes anywhere," I said firmly. With adding emphasis in mind, I deployed the anchors from my legs, embedding them in the wood floor. "You know everything about me, but I know so little about you. Only fair I learn a bit."

She glared at me, now fully awake and, possibly, pissed. I stared back, as determined to hold my ground as she was to avoid it altogether. She seemed to relent with a sigh and hopped back on the bed to lay down with her hooves under her. "Fine. Ask me a few questions and I'll give you some honest answers."

"Why did you break from the Steel Rangers?"

"Easy one," she said with a hoof wave. "They did some stuff I didn't agree with. So I quit. They tried to follow me, but after sending a few of them back dead, they gave up."

That was too easy, I thought to myself. I know there's something deeper. "There's more to it, isn't there? The stuff they did was against more than just your principles, wasn't it?" She looked away, uncomfortable.

"Yes," she said after a minute. "They hurt me, but I'd really rather not talk about it. Not right now at least." She looked back at me with a sadness in her eyes. "Please. I promise I'll tell you eventually. Just not now."

"Alright," I replied evenly. I could let that go for now, but it would be back. With a vengeance too, I'll bet. "Who was that reaper you were fighting back in Filly? You went to a lot of trouble to get him."

"He wasn't anyone special," she replied. "Just someone whose name I remembered was on the Ranger's wanted lists. Figured I'd do the world some good by getting rid of him." Alarm bells went off in my head, and my vocal analyzer read that, while not a lie, it wasn't the whole truth either. I decided to push that button a little more.

"Didn't I ask you not to lie to the robo-pony?"

"I didn't lie to you," she said darkly, giving me the most venomous stare yet. "Just because I held something back does NOT make it a lie. You want the truth? Fine. He was an ex-lover that left me a long time ago for a really stupid reason."

More evasion. But the way she was, I was better off letting it go for now. I'd come back to it later maybe. "Last question. I noticed you've been having nightmares almost every night. Wanna tell me about them?"

"Look around," she said, waving a hoof to encompass the world. "We're living a nightmare. Why should my dreams be any different?"

I sighed and walked over to sit beside her on the floor (no way that bed would hold the amount of metal that made up my body. Hell, I was surprised I hadn't fallen through the floor yet.) "I'm just worried about you, Night Rose. I see you suffering, and I feel like I need to help you."

"I don't need help," she replied bitterly. "I haven't needed anyone for a long time. I'm doing just fine alone."

"Everyone needs help sometimes."

"I'm not everyone. Are we done now?"

"Yes," I replied sadly, my gaze falling to the floor. "We're done now."

She hopped off the bed and opened the door to leave, then suddenly stopped and looked back at me. "I didn't mean 'done being together,'" she explained. "I… I'm…"

I just nodded in understanding and lay down on the mattress beneath me, facing the window. I heard her turn and almost come back to me, but I felt so depressed I wouldn't have cared if she did. No, that wasn't true. I wanted her to turn back. I wanted her to wrap her hooves around me and apologize, or just hold me. Anything.

Instead, she stood there for a minute, then walked out of the room, closing the door. My sadness reached another low point, and the tears flowed from my eyes.

I lay there for several hours, staring at the wall beneath the window. In that time, I'd scanned it with infrared, ultra sonic waves, chemical analysis, and two dozen other testing beams. I knew its composition, age, where the tree had been cut down, and the earliest date it would need to be replaces barring external influence. Needless to say, I was bored and depressed.

A soft knock came at the door, but I didn't answer. I didn't even raise my ears from the sides of my head. The door creaked open slowly. I knew it wasn't Night Rose. She would have just come in without knocking. The voice of the pony that met my ears was much softer.

"Vers," Winter Frost called softly. "Are you alright?" I didn't answer, so she closed the door and sat down next to me. "Did something happen between you and Night Rose? She's over on the playground swing set, crying."

"Is it that hard for her to tell me about herself," I asked without looking up.

"For some ponies, it's impossible to open up," Winter replied. "She's just been hurt too many times, I guess."

"I don't want to hurt her," I said. "And she knows it. Why does she keep pushing me away?"

"I don't know, Vers."

I was tired of being sad now. I decided to change the subject to something happier. "Did your husband show you what he found?"

"Yes," Winter replied, accepting the topic change. "It's an engine from a pre-war passenger vehicle. We've never seen one like it before. It would have had enough power to propel something large through the air, assuming it had wings."

"Sounds neat."

"You may take a look at it, if you like."

I was about to say that I would, when another knock came at the door. This one was more insistant, and hadn't come from a pony's hoof. Winter answered it, opening the door a crack. An eagle's head was visible, the eyes looking down at the pony. "May I help you?"

"I'm looking for the bot called Versatile," the female Griffon said, looking past Winter at me. Winter turned her head to glance my way, and I nodded, standing up as she opened the door wider and stepped aside.

"How do you know I'm an android," I asked.

"Reliable source," the griffon replied. One of the kids, I bet. They didn't grasp the levity of the Pinkie Pie Swear. "I'm lookin to hire you for a job, if you're available."

"What job," I asked.

"Mind if I come in?" I nodded and backed away from the door. The griffon stepped in and Winter stepped out, closing the door behind her. I nodded my thanks as she left. "Name's Gawdyna Grimfeathers," the griffon continued. "Some of my merc's got themselves stuck up by Trottingham."

"I heard," I said, offering her a seat on the bed. "DJ-Pon3 said they were covering a merchant run when it went south. Hellhounds, if I remember right."

"You do," Gawdyna replied with a nod, sitting on the bed. "Normal times, I'd send a rescue team of my own people, but they're all spread out right now, what with all the business we've been getting since setting up shop. I'm out of hands, and have to ask around."

"And you were thinking me and my friends could help out," I prompted.

"Well, I was thinkin of just you, but if you wanna bring help, that's your business. I'm willin to pay, seein as it's a dangerous job."

"What if I'd said no?"

"I'd be very, very sad and have to go by myself," she said, giving me a hurt look that I could tell wasn't genuine. "And it's such a long way for a lone griffon."

"I'll have to talk it over with them, but I I'm in regardless," I replied. I wasn't sure what made me so agreeable. Maybe it was my overwhelming need to help people out. Maybe it was what Watcher had said to me. Maybe I was just grasping at straws.

Gawdyna smiled, her beak making it look vicious. "Let me know when you're ready to go. I'll be sending a guide along with you. It's all I can spare. You'll get the payment when you get back."

"Consider it a deal, Gawdyna," I said, holding out a hoof. She took it in her claw and shook it, still grinning.

"Call me Gawd."

"So you just agreed?"

I'd gathered up Night Rose, Winter, and Starry Grove about twenty minutes later. Tiller was there as well, along with Silver Bell. I wasn't sure why she was here, but it really didn't matter. She probably wanted to hang out with Tiller as much as she could.

"I agreed for myself alone, Night Rose," I replied, part of me still upset about what had happened earlier. Maybe that was why I'd said yes so easily. "You're free to say no. As for you two," I continued, turning to Winter and Starry. "I only asked you here to let you know what I was up to. I don't expect you to want to go."

"I don't mind going," Starry replied easily. His grin told me he was almost anxious to go. I tilted my head questioningly. "You saved my family, Vers. That's not a debt any of us are going to forget. And we always pay our debts."

"My only worry is what to do about Tiller," Winter said. "If he can be safe, of course I'm going."

"He can probably stay with me and mommy," Silver Bell chimed in happily. "We've got lots of room!"

"I'll discuss it with Ditzy, then."

"You two know what you're getting into, right," Night Rose said. "Hellhounds aren't anything to sneeze at, and it'll take more than a beast of a pistol to kill one. Never mind a whole pack."

"Regardless, we've made up our mind," Starry told her. Winter nodded beside him.

"Thanks, guys," I said, relieved. "What about you, Night Rose."

She glared at me darkly, then looked out the window at the darkening sky. "I never said no, did I?"

"So we're agreed then," Starry said, breaking the sudden tension. "We're all on board to save Gawd's Talons."

"Looks that way," I said with a nod. "I'll go find her and tell her we're all in."

"You guys are real lucky I'm getting paid extra," the griffon named Scary yelled. "Cause this is pretty damn degrading!"

He was pulling a Sky Bandit loaded with three ponies, one fully suited in power armor. Starry had secured some armored barding from Ditzy Doo for himself and Winter, as well as a rifle each. Since I'd already gotten plenty of ammo, they hadn't needed to get extra. "We really appreciate it," he yelled back.

I was flying alongside the Sky Bandit, easily keeping pace with the griffon. It was slow going, but much faster than on-foot. I didn't dare look over at the vehicle. Doing that would risk meeting Night Rose's armored gaze. I knew she was staring at me, but her helmet hid her expression at this distance. I kept my gaze zoomed in forward, trained on the horizon and what loomed out of the darkness there.

Trottingham. And the mass of Hellhounds that covered it.

Footnote: Level Up!

New Perk: Silver Tongue – You, sir, have the gift of gab. You could talk an old lady with white gloves into buying a ketchup popsicle. Your Barter is increased by 5%.

Ch 21: Here There Be Dragons!
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Fallout Equestria: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Ch 21: Here There Be Dragons!

FoE: Do Robot Ponies Dream of Electronic Bunnies

Chapter XXI: Here There Be Dragons!

"Ye'd best start believin in ghost stories, Miss Turner... YER IN ONE!" ~ Cpt. Barbosa, Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl

System Report: 0000000021
Unit Status: Active
Location: Zebrion
Satellite Signal Status: GPS active.
Begin data dump to external off-site memory back-up:

- - - - - Done.
Preparing visual report: Done.

Date: --/--/2212, 200PA (+63 days activation)
Time: 2031 Local

A Dragon.

A really fucking big dragon. Big by my own standards, and being bigger than an alicorn, that's saying a lot. I mean, seriously.

"Holy fucking ass-crackers," was all Scratch would say for the first ten minutes of the dragon de-cloaking right next to our camp. The rest of my friends were just as eloquent in speech for about as long. Myself, meanwhile, did my damnest to get over the initial shock, and achieved lucidity in half the time. Fortunately, the dragon was used to such reactions.

"Sorry for going brain-dead on you there," I said to her now laying-on-the-ground head. The end of her snout was the only bit that was fully illuminated by the fire light, her golden-yellow scales reflected some of it. The rest of her body was silhouetted against the night sky, and even lying down she was a good fifty feet from dirt to spine tips. Really. Big. Dragon.

"Eh," she snorted, nearly blowing out the fire. "It's fine. Happens all the time when I'm made to deal with your kind. For some reason, all ponies know of dragons is our babies and our magic. Past that, we're monsters."

"Maybe it's that you don't socialize with them enough," I commented. "I know dragons are solitary for the most part, but if you came out from time to time and talked to them..."

"Have you MET modern ponies," she asked. The cynicism practically dripped from her words. "If I showed up in any town anywhere, I'd get shot at. While not exactly a problem, neither is it an endearing trait of the wasteland. 'It's bigger and scary, let's shoot it!' Please. I have better things to do than try to convince some tiny creatures that I don't want to eat them."

"Like... like get us into Zebrion?" Apple Cider had recovered from his shock and timidly approached the dragon. "That's why you're hear right?"

"That's why Spike called me... Oops! I wasn't supposed to call him by name." The way she said it, I don't think it was on accident. Still, she seemed willing to help. I wasn't gonna call her out on her attitude.

"At any rate, we should be going soon. Getting past the plague-microbes won't be a problem, but what's beyond them will be, so we're gonna do it at night."

"And what's beyond the Invisible Death," Zirc asked. "Is it not enough to be afraid for our breath?"

"Oh you should still fear it, zebra," she chuckled. Her laugh was something short of a train wrecking into a rather large and completely solid block of tungsten, in that the train dies a very loud and screeching death. "But beyond it, ghosts."

"Ghosts?" Scratch leapt behind Frieda who just smirked at her. AC jumped into Chef Sandy's arms and shuddered violently. Chef simply dropped him. Night Rose hid partially beneath me.

"There are no such things as ghosts," I replied. "There's no possible way they could exist."

"Sure of that, are you?"

"Prove me wrong. Why should I believe in ghosts?"

"Because these aren't pony ghosts. Those might not exist, I'll give it to you. Dragon spirits, on the other hand."

"And we're going there willingly?" The fear in Swiftpaws' voice didn't show on his body. "Are we sure this is a good idea? Angering the spirits?"

"They're already angry," the dragon replied. "Us passing through won't give them any more rage, just a target to vent what's pent-up. Now, are we going or not?"

"I'm going," I said. "Anyone who's coming with, pack up and load up. Our ride's here and leaving soon."

Everyone went about cleaning up camp, albeit slowly. Apparently I was the only one who didn't believe in ghosts. In due time, we all walked up the dragon's tail to her back, and settled in for the ride. I noticed our wolf companion did so very nervously, with his tail tightly between his legs. It set of mental flags, but I didn't have time to do anything about it.

She had two rows of fairly tall spines running the length of her back, so we didn't have to worry about falling off to the side. With ease she rose to her feet and took off at a run, flapping her giant leathery wings and taking to the air.

"So what do we call you," I asked, having to amplify my voice over the now rushing wind.

"Names are useless where I'm from," she replied. "Just call me Dragon."

I found that sort of odd. Even raiders had names. Why didn't a centuries-old dragon? Rather than put my hoof in my mouth and ask, though, I changed the subject. "So how long have you been out here?"

"My whole life and then some," she replied. "Zebrion has been my home ever since I was an egg."

"Your mom birthed you here then," Night Rose asked, slightly over her fear of Dragon. "I mean, she laid you out here before the war?"

"Long before," Dragon replied. "My clutch was laid a few hundred years after Nightmare Moon was banished. "

"Wow, you're old," Night Rose muttered. Dragon chuckled, having heard the comment over her own flapping wings.

"I'm probably the oldest dragon alive," she said. "Used to live with a green in the Everfree Forest a few years before the war started, but he got mad at because a certain purple baby found his hoard and ate some of it. He moved without even telling me, the big jerk."

"Do you know how many dragons are still alive," I asked. I was curious if they were now an endangered species. Dragon, however, shook her head and glanced back to meet my eye.

"Dragons are rare now, and we tended to keep to ourselves even before most of us decided to join in your war. That little event nearly wiped us out, and the rest scattered all over the planet. Now there's no way to know. Watcher might, but..." She shrugged at that and returned her attention to flying. "Thankfully, babies are still being produced. I know of one working with the zebras in Borderland. A little red, I think. Don't remember her name."

"Are you worried about your species," Shadowpaw asked. Of all my companions, he knew best what a small population meant.

"Not really," Dragon replied. "We've survived worse, and had lower numbers before. We'll thrive again."

She suddenly reared back and let loose a long stream of fire. Everyone went to her left side to see what she'd flamed, and saw a glowing cloud falling away. It struck me as odd at first. Clouds don't usually fall.

"Take that, Invisible Death," AC cheered from my side, and I quickly remembered why we'd needed Dragon in the first place.

This was going to be an easy trip.

Karma, why you no like me?

Three hours later, my party had gotten bored with cheering Dragon's flaming abilities and fallen asleep. Even with all the excitement, it was just about midnight after all. I was the only one awake, and I was pondering again. What was this Doctor Stiches going to be like? Was he the one who kept hacking into my systems? I hoped I wasn't on a wild goose chase with this. Well, even if I was, it was probably worth it to help AC and Chef. I had been hired by them after all. I still didn't know why Frieda had come along, or Scratch, for that matter. She was a complete mystery to me as to why she was here. As far as I could tell, she wasn't anyone's marefriend; I'd seen her physically slap AC one night, and Chef wasn't interested in her at all. So what was her story?

"I know you're still awake back there." Dragon had stopped her flaming half an hour back, and was silently gliding across the moonlit sky. "What's on your mind?"

"Lots and little," I replied. "Just... well, everything."

"Climb up here and let's talk about everything, then."

I had to admit, I was slightly nervous climbing up the neck of a dragon, but she'd invited me and besides, if she wanted to hurt me or any of us, she'd have done it long ago. I slowly made my way along her neck, which was pretty flat, to the top of her head. Looking out in front of us, I felt a burst of exhilaration. I hadn't flown in a long while, at least not under my own power. It's one thing to fly in an airship, quite another to fly with nothing surrounding you.

"So what's on your mind, hmm?" Dragon was blunt and straight-forward, but she'd lived several centuries longer than I'd even been an idea. I think she was allowed to be cheeky.

"My friends, mostly." I sat down at her brow so I wouldn't have to shout into the wind. "I've been traveling with them for almost a month now, and I barely know about them. Night Rose I've known for two months and I love her, but she still won't say anything about her past."

"I assume you've been direct as well as sneaky," Dragon said. In truth I'd even put little notes on scraps of paper I'd found and tucked them into her bags. I didn't even know if she'd seen them or just tossed them out as garbage. "Well, with that one, all I can say is that time will be your best ally."

"I don't want to push her," I replied. "But at the same time, I know she has problems rooted in her past. She has bad nightmares, kicks out and cries in her sleep. I just want to help her with them."

"The only thing you can do is talk to her. That's the best I can say. I don't know her as well as you to."

I nodded, more to myself than in acknowledgement of her statement. I didn't really have a response for that.

"As for the others, same problem, same answer. Ask! You can't sit on my forehead and say you're afraid of asking them what they're all about. The pony who single-hoofedly convinced an entire Raptor crew to turn and fire on their own ships?"

"More like I was the catalyst to get them to do it themselves," I snorted. "Hell, in that battle I was more or less a bystander."

"Regardless, you did it. Alone, no less. So I know you aren't afraid of them."

Again, I had to nod. For all my intelligence, for all my advanced technology, it all boiled down to one simple fact.

"I am not a clever pony, am I?"

"You're young," she replied with a giggle. Again, the giggle of a dragon is more akin to a rockslide coming down a very tall mountain covered in landmines. "You've been alive only, how long?"

"Just over two months," I told her. She seemed a little surprised, but took it in stride.

"There you go! Not nearly enough time to learn how ponies work. If they're your friends, they'll open up to you. That's what friends do."

We lapsed into a strangely comfortable silence while I processed this. It was one aspect of friendship I hadn't even considered. Winter Starry and Tiller had told me about themselves without my even asking. I couldn't assume everyone just poured their past out like that. So if I wanted answers, I had to ask questions.

I was about to thank dragon when she suddenly went transparent.

"Stay quiet," she whispered. I went back to my friends and nosed them awake, urging them to be silent. It wasn't that I was scared of them freaking out when they could see down, but that they might do so unexpectedly. Whatever spooked an ancient dragon into not being seen was definitely not something to mess with. I only hoped her camouflage didn't reveal us.

As I looked down through the body of the dragon (a weird feeling, akin to looking through the glass bottom of a boat), but all I saw was the dark, scorched ground. My friends all did the same, a look of worry on all their faces. Swiftpaws was the only one not looking down. He was curled up tightly with his eyes closed, his body visibly shivering. I couldn't blame him. Flying on a dragon was bad enough. Having it suddenly disappear had to have a bad effect on him mentally.

I brought up the files I had on wolves. They weren't suited for anything aerial. Studies told that they could barely stand flying in Sky Wagons. One quote from a researcher said that "if there was open sky and no walls, the wolf could be prone to panic and throw itself off the chariot, or on one occasion, at the pegasi pulling it." Images accompanied the report on that incident. It wasn't pretty.

Scratch seemed to have noticed the canine's discomfort, and made her way to lie at his side. My enhanced hearing picked up her humming as she laid her head on his back gently. I recognized the tune. It was a song written by a school teacher in praise of Celestia and Luna, in thanks for their raising and lowering of the celestial bodies they controlled.

Zirc turned and, seeing the situation, joined them on Swiftpaws' other side, laying his own head next to the wolf's and humming silently. It wasn't long before the entire group was gathered around them, listening to them hum quietly to the terrified wolf. If we didn't have to be quiet, I would have started playing the accompanying music. Thinking back now, that would have ruined the moment, so I'm glad I couldn't. Eventually, Swiftpaws stopped shivering. He didn't open his eyes, but visibly relaxed a bit.

I was surprised Zirc knew that song at all.

"The danger has passed," Dragon called, returning to the visible spectrum again.

"What was it," AC asked.

"It's better that you don't know, but if you must..." She sighed, her back heaving slightly. "One of the more powerful spirits passed closely to us from below. Fortunately, he didn't look up. My chameleon ability doesn't apply to passengers."

"You mean if the ghost had just raised its head, we'd have been in trouble?"

"Well, not exactly trouble, but definitely hindered."

"What's the difference?"

"Hindered, I find an alternate way of sneaking past," Dragon replied, turning her head to look back it him. "In trouble, I have to take evasive maneuvers."

"And that's worse because..."

"You all go flying off my back," she said immediately.

Right. I could catch maybe two others after I caught Night Rose. Frieda could catch one. That left two ponies/zebra/wolf to plummet to the ground below. I really didn't want to make that decision. We all lapsed back into silence, with only the sound of Scratch and Zirc humming to lull us back to sleep. I hoped to hell there weren't any more spirits on our path.

Hey, if a one-hundred-fifty foot tall, centuries old ancient golden dragon who could hide in the sky believed in them, who was I to argue their existence?

Footnote: New Perk! Wary of the Unseen ~ Ghosts exist. You're dead certain of it. If an area is rumored to be haunted, you lose 30% AP but gain 20% Awareness while there! Keep your head on a swivel!