Worse Stories For Worse People

It was a cold and lonely night, and all was silent. Starlight Glimmer slept in her cozy bed. She was awoken by a nightmare. How spooky. She turned on the light. How? Because plot convenience. Look shit-heads I haven’t read a single piece of fan-fiction for years, and also haven’t seen an episode of this fuckin show since the S6 or 5 premiere I actually don’t remember. It took my about 7 hours to sit through it and watch it in 2 minute intervals because it was akin to Chinese Water Torture except I slowly became more autistic. So I don’t know shit about how fuckin lights work in this universe, okay?

Anyway she opened up the fucking draw and noticed that she could lift the base out, so she did. Holy shit, she thought. She looked on the other side. It said;

The Bye Bye Pony

“The Bye Bye Pony...” she said. Oh shit. Oh fuckin shit guys. She fucking did it. She fucking did it alright. She fucked up so fucking bad. Holy fucking shit dudes she fucked the fuck up so fucking hard how the fuck do you even fuck up this fucking bad???? Jesus Christ, how the fuck? This fucking cunt of a fucking horse fucked up so fucking bad. Jesus Joseph Mary and the holy Lord above in Heaven this cunt has absolutely fucked herself. I’m fucking gobsmacked at how fucking stupid this stupid fucking horse is. I thought horses had similar intelligence to humans, but apparently I was dead fucking wrong, because this horse is SO fucking stupid, she just said fucking “Bye Bye Pony” aloud. Do you fucking know what that means?? Jesus christ wait a second. Just fill your mouth with popcorn you fucking fat piece of dogshit. That’s right, I’m going to milk your fat man tits and make the butter for the popcorn which other fat fuckers will eat. Holy fuc-

Wait a second…

Just wait..

Wait....

Wait for it….

Just wait a few more moments….

Wait….

Waaaait….

Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaait….

Wait a second…

Wait a final moment…

And...

BOOM JUMPSCARE!!!!!!!!!

A CGI DOG JUST KILLED HER BROTHER HOLY FUCK THAT CGI WAS TERRIBLE JESUS THAT IS JUST THE WORST SHIT IVE EVER SEEN HOW THE FUCK IS THIS MOVIE IN A THEATRE JESUS CHRIST OH MY GOD THIS IS JUST HORRIBLE AND CANCEROUS LIKE A TUMOUR ON MY FUCKING NUTSACK JESUS CHRIST THIS IS LIKE BEING MOLESTED BY AN ELEPHANT ALTHOUGH REALLY WHO THE FUCK WOULD WILLINGLY GET FUCKED BY AN ELEPHANT LIKE HOW IS IT EVEN MOLESTATION I MEAN I GUESS IT’S BECAUSE THERE’S NO OTHER WORD FOR IT BUT DAMN THAT IMPLIES THAT AN ELEPHANT COULD CONSENSUALLY FUCK SOMEONE ALTHOUGH I GUESS I’M WRITING THIS SHITTY STORY FOR SOME FAT OLD FAGGOTS WHO LIKE TO JACK OFF TO HORSES AND I’M SURE THEY’D LET A FUCKING HORSE FUCK THEM IN THE ASS AND THEY’D FUCKING DIE WHICH TO BE COMPLETELY HONEST WOULD BE A BENEFIT TO SOCIETY BECAUSE BRONIES ARE THE SCUM OF THE EARTH AND LITERALLY LIKE ON THE SAME LEVEL AS THE SONIC FANBASE DURING THEIR WORST YEARS LIKE JESUS YOU GUYS MAKE JOSEF FRITZL LOOK LIKE A CHILL AND NICE GUY LIKE DAMN I’D RATHER GO TO SCHOOL WITH ERIC HARRIS AND DYLAN KLEBOLD THAN HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH YOU FUCKING FREAKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Starlight Glimmer then died because the Bye Bye pony got her. The fucking end. And this is the end of me making fanfictions anymore, by the way. Trump was the best thing to happen to America, you pussies. Okay bye that’s the end.