She read the letter again.

“Miss Hoofbeats,
We received your notice about your supply delay and wanted to inform you that we do, in fact, have a partnership with a producer with an extensive supply of rubber. Please send us a description of your needs and we’ll have it shipped by dragon in time for your product to appear in our September catalogue.
Best Wishes,
Rug Burn
Nethertease Head of Product Acquisition.”

Hoofbeats smiled. Having a good shipment of rubber coming in would leave her with a lot of free time she would have otherwise spent harvesting her trees. This was the perfect opportunity to take the time to develop her new kind of vibrator.

Earth ponies are not completely exempt from magic usage. In fact, there are some feats only they can perform. For instance, only earth ponies can grow magical fruits, like zap apples and beans, because they have a special connection with the land. For this reason, Hoofbeats decided to look to nature for inspiration for her creation. Pony technology, even thaumic, was leagues away from any sort of portable battery, however she was sure she could find a plant that did the job. She was honestly surprised nopony had researched this yet, but then she remembered the lack of experts in her field. Perhaps, she reasoned, it was not part of normal pony psychology to look to deeply into these things.

A cursory research session uncovered the obvious: all plants move on their own. A search for what she knew as rapid plant movement revealed a few very educational things. First off, squirting cucumbers are a real thing that actually exist (but they’re too small and sensitive to be of any real use). Secondly, nearly everything else in that category was equally useless. She had almost given up to go find a unicorn for help, when she came across an interesting book on vegetative fauna. Perusing it out of sheer curiosity, she came across this quote:

“When a fragment of a timberwolf is broken off, it will vibrate briefly before reassembling itself.”

She considered that timberwolf wood would make a great ingredient to add to her rubber mix if it continued to vibrate when separated from the rest of the body, but Hoofbeats didn’t know for sure if this was a good idea. It seemed very iffy from a moral standpoint.

“While they appear bestial in nature, timberwolves actually possess no brain or central nervous system.”

That settled it! Hoofbeats decided that if she could dismantle a timberwolf and use the pieces in her dildos, she would have the perfect signature product. With that in mind, she began to pack her bags to head out into the woods. She had never hunted before, let alone timberwolves, so she was a little unsure of what to bring, but she had a plan.

First, she used a few belts to create a holster around her waist, into which she slid a sharp axe. She threw her saddlebags on over that, and packed about ten Scootameters of rope. Then she threw in some matches and a can of hairspray, so she could just torch everything in case of an emergency. On her way to the forest, she stopped at a griffon market to pick up her final supply, a couple of fish she could use as bait.

She walked along the path into the dark woods. Once she was sure she was deep enough, she diverged into thicker brush to set up her encampment. Her idea was to build a bear trap like the kind bison would use to protect their tribes in the Old West. She began by digging a hoof-sized hole in the ground and filling it with murky water to conceal its depth. For the next step, she put in two sets of wooden stakes, one set inside the hole and one around the outer edge, planted at an angle such that they would fold in on themselves if pressure was applied. She lay a loop of rope loosely around the top layer of stakes, and tied the other end to a tree. If a timberwolf stepped into the trap, the rope would tighten, and the bonus snare from the wooden stakes would cause it to struggle enough to ensure a tight knot.

She found a nice bush to hide in, and waited…

Author's Note

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NsIojj4PzAo
About a minute in.