The Dovahkiin - An Equestrian Prophecy

Chapters

A Prophecy Discovered
Before (edited)
A Terrible Accident
News Flash! You're a Pony
Diagnosis and... wait, I'm what?!
Horsing Around
Meeting the Kids
First Night in Equestria
It's Helgen All Over Again
To Canterlot! ... Oh no
Rewards and Ruins

A Prophecy Discovered

Three ponies cautiously entered the ancient ruin. An Earth Pony, a Pegasus, and a Unicorn. Their goal? Same as always: investigate the ancient ruins, and report back anything interesting. Which would be rather hard, for this place was indeed very interesting!

Duke Venture, the male Earth Pony and leader of the trio, certainly agreed with that. Looking around, he hardly didn't see a thing that wasn't interesting. The walls of the labyrinthian ruins were carved with things that depicted things he knew not of. He had seen many different ruins, but not many ruins had captivated him this much.

It wasn't just the carvings. All kinds of foreign symbols dotted the walls as well, accompanying the carvings. An ancient language of sorts, most likely. But no presently available book in Equestria had any information regarding these symbols. These symbols were most certainly new.

"How much history are you willing to bet are carved on these walls, ladies? We have barely even entered the ruin and we've seen what must be years of unrecorded history!" Duke said to his companions, the pegasus Scarlet Breeze and the unicorn Ruby Aurora.

"I wouldn't be betting just yet, Duke. We have no idea how big this thing is." Scarlet replied.

"And not to forget we haven't seen any of the real treasure yet." Ruby added.

"Every time, I tell you we're not here for the treasure, Ruby. As enticing as ancient loot is, it would be best if we left the archaeological remains for the archaeologists... we're just here to make sure it's safe to enter." Duke said, continuing to walk down the hall.

"Should'a been an archaeologist..." Ruby muttered.

Duke ignored her and kept walking. The carvings just kept going on, as did the markings. If not for Ruby being a unicorn, he'd be worried about getting lost. Ruby placed magical markers as they passed, and if they needed to they could make a beeline for the exit. Benefit of having a unicorn in your exploration group.

The 3 continued on before coming to a turn in the hall, and Duke was, for once, surprised not to have been surprised by some nasty trap. The ruin was just... open for exploration. Or so he thought. Whether or not it would continue being like this, he knew not. At last the hall ended at a large door, which had markings covering it and appeared to be a puzzle of some kind...

"Dead end?" Asked Scarlet.

"No. I believe its a puzzle." Duke answered, yanking his notebook from his saddlebag and flipping through a few pages, "And luckily for us, it's written in an early version of Equestrian."

He picked out a few notable words written on the door and looked down at the notebook, and after a few minutes he had come to the conclusion it was a phrase. Ah, the door was unlocked by moving the words to fit a certain phrase! Of course! How quite simple!

"Ruby, I need you to activate Panel one once, Panel two five times, Panel three two times, and Panel four three times." Duke commanded the unicorn.

Ruby nodded and ignited her horn, using her magic to turn the panels the number of times Duke had ordered. At the final movement, there was a loud click and then there was a sliding noise as the door started descending, revealing another hallway which ended with a single large room. From there they could see a stone table in the center, and it was pretty clear they should get closer to it.

"What did it say?" Ruby asked Duke.

"He who walks this path shall find no comfort." Duke said in a monotone voice, continuing forward.

Ruby and Scarlet exchanged glances, but said nothing. Both then followed closely behind Duke.

The three of them entered the room with the stone tablet, and Ruby ignited her horn to provide some light as Duke approached the etched table.

"Fascinating!" Duke proclaimed, "This here would seem to be a passage! And even better, it is written in both that crazy symbol stuff and Ancient Equestrian!"

"What does it say, then?" Scarlet inquired.

"Hold on, give me a moment. I need a few moments to translate this. Have a look around if you wish, it's just a room." Duke waved her off, busying himself with the tablet and notebook.

Scarlet frowned slightly then walked toward one of the walls of the room, which had a lot of carvings decorating it. None of it made any sense to her. All she saw was... some ponies and... some dragon over them, a wind leaving its mouth and hitting the... oh, that wasn't wind, was it? Shaking her head, her eyes scanned the rest of the wall, none of that making sense either. In the upper right corner, there was... what was it? She could hardly tell. Whatever it was was indeterminable due to what had to be erosion. She stopped studying it when Duke cried aloud with excitement.

"So, what does it say?" Scarlet asked once more.

"When four Alicorns rule Equestria, a great evil will awaken. Hmm, if my estimation is correct, this was written before there were any Alicorns. How would the ancients have known about them?"

"Read on, Duke." Ruby poked him.

"Rivers will run red and the sky will be ablaze. Entire cities will be razed, and the ground will be littered with bodies. Good Celestia, we're talking of Armageddon here!"

"Duke, keep reading."

"Magic will be useless, no god nor goddess with the power to defeat him. He will consume the world in a fury, and all will end. Hold on, that's not all..." Duke flipped through his notebook again and did a few rechecks of his translation.

"Alright, here's the rest. But hope is still present. A hero will arise, a hero with a destiny: a destiny to stop the destroyer. This pony will have the body of a mortal, and the soul of a dragon... now that's confusing... with the power to use the breath of a dragon. A great battle will ensue, a battle that will determine the fate of the world. And... that's it." Duke stared blankly at the table, wondering if he had translated correctly. Which he had.

"Well, that was confusing. Soul of a dragon and body of a pony? That's something you don't hear everyday." Duke rose and turned to face his companions.

"It's a pity we have little means of understanding it better." He started for the exit.

"Hey, what about this wall carving?" Ruby said before Duke got far, and he turned to look at her.

"It's probably even more confusing than the tablet, Ruby." He deadpanned.

"And if it isn't? Perhaps this visual will help some? It must be important somehow... the carvings start from right to left in a straight line. This one here," she motions to the wall with the carving she had been studying earlier, "Starts at the top left corner and continues to the right corner, and then hooks around to the bottom right corner, heads to the bottom left, then goes up and forms a spiral pattern that fits perfectly inside the wall. None of the other carvings do this."

Duke audibly sighed and glanced at Scarlet, who shrugged.

"Fine, I suppose I should take a look." He groaned, reentering the room and approaching the mentioned wall.

"Ruby, light please." He got a light in response.

He turned his observing gaze to the top left corner, and started taking everything he saw in, and tried his best to put into words the pictures.

"How unfortunate that the only text on this wall is that crazy symbol language. I would have loved to translate this. Anyway... from what I'm seeing, the wall starts with... something. Unfortunately it's incredibly eroded and so I can't get a good look at it. Also looks like a pony comes into play after the first few bits there. Maybe that's the "hero." The next several slides seem to suggest that this pony meets with one of the Princesses... too bad it's not clear which one. Then the next few carvings introduce a dragon, and... well, he's burning... ponies. The pony from earlier... fights the dragon, and if the number of carvings depicting this battle is to say anything... it is a really long and difficult battle. The pony triumphs over the dragon... and the dragon... explodes? Well, that's new." Duke looked over the wall, making sure he didn't misinterpret anything. Looked like what he said, to him.

"After the dragon... explodes... um... well... something happens. The rest of it is too eroded to decipher." Duke blows at the "eroded" part, hoping it was just dust that had settled over the carving, but it was indeed erosion.

"Does it mean anything to you, Duke?" Ruby finally spoke up.

Duke gazed at her and remained silent for some time, and the ruin was quiet once again. This silence, of course, did not last.

"I can't really say. It's credibility is doubtable... I'd say we best leave while the sun's still up." Duke turned and started for the exit.

Ruby and Scarlet exchanged glances, and with a nod, Ruby pulled out a camera and took a photo of the wall and tablet, then grabbed a piece of paper and pen and quill and wrote down the majority of what Duke had said, then put the items in a bag and replaced it in her saddlebag.

"You girls coming or what?" Duke called from halfway down the hall.

"Yes, we're coming!" Both shouted, running to catch up with him.

It was indeed a shame that there was no wealth here. Ruby had been looking forward to that. Even though Duke had said it was confusing, she had a bad feeling about not taking notice of it. As terrible as the translation was, it did raise a good number of questions. Questions the Princesses might be able to provide answers to, or if not then major contributions to an answer.

Ruby put her thoughts on the matter aside, and thought more on how she could have better spent her time today.

Author's Note

Well, I sure hope this went ok... this'll probably be one of the few (if not only) chapters that have a 3rd person kind of perspective. Also, I wouldn't expect too many big chapters... most will be within 1,000 - 2,000 words each. Maybe I'll throw a thick one in there here and now, but no promises. I hope you guys all at least enjoy the story, and rest assured that there will be epic fights eventually.

Before (edited)

Author's Note

So I'm ahead of schedule, everyone! :yay: I have gotten rid of the useless babbling on and replaced it with something less "uh, who's this guy this story's centered around?" And after a careful recheck of the word count, I realized my editing made the chapter about 200 words longer! :yay: Hope those of you who are re-reading this chapter enjoy it better than before!

Before (edited)

"Aaaaannnnd... HEADSHOT!!!" My brother walked right into my trap, so foolishly turning the corner right into the sights of my scope, and my sniper rifle.

"Aww come on, that's not fair!" My seven year-old brother whined.

"It's completely fair, you just need to stop being stupid." I said, preparing myself another ambush for him.

"No you're not! You're always killing me!" He complained.

"That's the objective of Custom Match, idiot." I chuckled, watching the screen as he, once again, came into view.

"HEADSHOT!!!" I exclaimed, laughing as his character made a dying noise.

"Nope nope nope nope." My brother hit Pause and then hit End Game.

"Dude, what the hell?!"

"You weren't being fair!"

"I was too!"

"You don't let me win!"

"Well screw you, I'm playing my laptop now." I dropped the Xbox remote and grabbed my laptop from my desk, and started walking out of the room.

He fussed again and I just ignored him. Don't know why he was crying. He knew exactly what he was getting himself into when he wanted to play Custom Match with me.

I let out a groan upon hitting the living room couch, smiling as I opened up my laptop and heard it powering up when I turned it on. The screen then illuminated and I saw my laptop's profile pic, a dragon, pop up next to my username and "Enter Password". I did the usual routine with that and hit Enter, then waited as it loaded me into my desktop. It loaded and the usual blank blue background greeted me. I should probably put something on there. I just never quite found the time. Or energy to. Laziness.

I think now's the time for introductions! Let's start that simply. I'm John. I'm a soon-to-be sophomore in high school, superb videogamer, and unbeknownst to almost everyone around me; I'm secretly a brony. Like, only one person knows, and that's my best friend. I'm only being so open about with you because... well, let's face it, you couldn't possibly let anyone close to me in on this secret. Anyways, let's get on with the story.

I double tapped the Medieval 2 icon and then started Vanilla when the Launcher box showed up. As unfortunate as it is, I did not own Total War: Attila yet. I had a taste of it last weekend when my best friend let me have a few hours on it... and it certainly put Medieval 2 down the drain. I definitely preferred Attila's soundtrack over M2's, but I had yet to purchase Attila. For now, I could settle for advancing farther in my Vanilla Hotseat Campaign.

Normally you can't play in Hotseat mode with Vanilla, but with a little modding it's possible. And worth it. Sure, if you play every faction a turn may last forever, but hey, that way you practically control all of the game... and from experience, I can tell you it's quite entertaining. Playing the aggressor one turn and then playing the defender the same turn with the challenge of defending your territory certainly makes for... uh... I shall use the word craziness to finish that sentence off. Not to forget that you get to control the Mongol and Timurid hordes when they arrive, which adds to the awesomeness. If you play on 0.5 timescale, then 273 turns of establishing dominant empires throughout Europe, Asia Minor and Northern Africa become challenged by the Mongol Horde... unfortunately, it was only turn 106 for me.

I got probably three turns down before I turned my laptop off and headed down for dinner. Just chicken for tonight's meal. Can't forget grandma's goodies that she hides in the cabinet, though... that she thinks she can hide food from me is a laughable concept. When will she learn?

After dinner... well, not much happened. I sat on the couch and watched some TV, grossed out my mom with the Killer Bees from Hell documentary, and then "went to bed", which for many people involves going to bed and closing their eyes, followed by unconsciousness. For me, it meant "play videogames all night long", which translated to "stay up until 1 AM reading stories on FiMfiction." To be honest, I'm not sure what I'd do without that website. Probably something useful with my life... nah. What would likely be the case is I'd waste my life building stuff on Minecraft. Or watching TV. Probably the former.

There is an option three. While not the greatest, I'm also a decent artist. Sort of. Mostly drawing. Option three would be creating designs for alien tech and craft, like I did a little while ago with an AT-ST model. I had a thought a while before that which went along the lines of "what if the Empire from Star Wars managed to harness magic?" So, what I ultimately did was draw a side-view of an AT-ST. I made the part the head rotates on and drive engine is located a little longer, and added a pair of "arms" equipped with blaster/laser cannons and an energized "sword" roughly 20 feet long. But there's more.

I also increased the height of the AT-ST. My modified version stands at about 39 feet high. And I'm still not done. I also added a rocket launcher on either of its arms. And
for a final addition, I added a unicorn horn-shaped spire towards the front of the top of the modified AT-ST's head. Obviously, this is the part that uses the magic, and it would be capable of using magic that only powerful unicorns (or alicorns) could be capable of pulling off, such as rapid self-repairment. The spire would glow just like a normal unicorn's horn would, and whatever it's casting magic on would glow the same color. Totally overpowered Imperial walker. And what did I name such a weapon of war? All Terrain Magic Harnessing Transport. Simply: AT-MHT. Sorry Ewoks, your trees are now no longer a problem.

As far as my creativity is concerned, usually I only draw fantasy maps for my brother and I to kill time... and to appease him when he demands I play something with him and there's little we agree on. And playing on my own fantasy maps got about 20% easier when I realized I could use Paint for our maps (not that I'm new to my laptop, I just never considered it). Other than that... I don't do much, besides being a money drain on my parents. And now, I'm at the age I could be having a job right now... but I don't. Last time I did have something close to it, which was helping my grandpa mow lawns, I accidentally broke someone's picket fence with a weed whipper, and then proceeded to get an eye full of dirt. Not a great start to having a job of some kind. Since then, he hasn't asked me to mow lawns. I don't blame him. I can only imagine how terribly my first real job will go.

Anyways, I'll move on.

Following dinner, I had the sudden remembrance that tomorrow I'd be going for a drive. On the freeway. With two people: the Driver's Ed instructor and a kid named Tyler. And I'd be laying my life in Tyler's hands for part of that drive. Oh God...

To tell ya, I was a good driver. Not perfect, but good. I can maintain my speed, not freak out next to semi trucks, cross intersections with virtually no problems... I was practically a pro. Tyler... not so much. He stays about twenty miles under the speed limit. The only time that's not the case is on the back roads. Also, he's not the greatest at crossing or turning on an intersection. And I'd be laying my life in his hands on the freeway?! Yeah, no thanks... but that's how it would be anyways.

I probably didn't have a thing to worry about. He surely hadn't gotten us into any trouble this far... this far. I honestly doubted his ability to get us through the freeway ali-

Stop it, brain. Quit doing that! Why must you always make me think about the worst-case scenarios? ... Huh? Huh?! ... No answer? ... Coward...

So anyways, I spent about the next half hour hyperventilating. Fun times.

If only I had known that my worst fears would come true...

A Terrible Accident

So today was the day. The day ahead of yesterday. The day I drove on the highway.

... and it was easy. Naturally, I was quite nervous getting in the car. I would drive through town and then onto the highway. And I did. The whole time the instructor kept telling me that "I was fine" and "You're doing great." I didn't believe her until I finished my drive, nearly perfectly having gone halfway to Lansing and back to town, and finishing off by excellently parking into a spot near some shopping places. It was like a weight had been lifted from my shoulders, and for the first time in that car today I relaxed. I was done.

And then, I realized, it was Tyler's turn.

I can't say I had much time to fret about it. I exited the driver's seat and swapped places with Tyler, who had been in the back. It was when I sat down and closed the door that I started to fret. Already, my mind visualized the horror of watching a semi barrel right into us. For a moment, I feared I was gonna die today.

No, I had to tell myself, everything's going to be fine. You'll see home again today.

So minutes later, we were on the highway again, this time Tyler being the one driving. I was nervous, like usual, at first, but eventually I calmed down and told myself everything was going well after all.

Or, rather, that's what I had told myself before the sky decided to drop the ocean on us. Not literally, of course, but it was no doubt a torrential downpour. Then I started getting scared.

"The weather's just been terrible these last few weeks." The instructor said from her front passenger seat. She received only silence. Silence from me because my head was concerned with other matters, and silence from Tyler because he could hardly see anything.

Despite that, he drove pretty well... for about five minutes. Because then, I noticed a slight screeching sound coming from outside...

I glanced at the instructor, and when I saw the look in her eyes when she turned to Tyler, I knew she had figured out the problem, too.

"You're skidding!" She told him.

Unfortunately for all of us, he didn't take the news very well. He slammed hard on the brakes and turned the wheel, which only made it worse. The car spun a few times before coming to a stop.

Both the instructor and I had to recover from this, and when she did she turned to him and looked like she was going to tear his throat out.

"What was that for?!" She nearly hollered. We never heard his answer.

At that moment, I realized my visualization from earlier hadn't been me depicting the worse case scenario... it had been a vision. And right then, nearly right in front of us, came barreling a semi trick at 71 miles an hour. We all managed a quick scream before impact.

I honestly wish I could say I simply blacked out the instant the truck slammed into the car. I really do. Unfortunately, as I discovered in that very same instant, all those stories I read simply skipped the reality of being rammed by a semi. There's no "and then I blacked out". There's no weird lights you see and then you black out. The reality... I wish upon no one.

The truck, firstly, completely destroyed the front of the car. Then, large chunks of metal, and the truck itself, came right through the vehicle. This all happened faster than the blink of an eye, mind you! The instructor and Tyler were utterly pulverized. Blood everywhere. But it didn't stop there.

The entire front of the car, or what was left of it, came right to me. I had no time to react. First, my feet were impaled by chunks of the front. As were my legs. Then, as if that wasn't bad enough, the car erupted into flame. I can't put into words how it felt being burnt alive. Few have lived being burnt alive to describe what it's like. And I can't say I had very long to feel it either. Again, this all happened faster than you can blink.

The last thing I remembered before actually losing consciousness was watching the shards of the front windshield come flying into my face.

Ow.

The very first thing I thought when I regained consciousness. A quite simple phrase used to describe general pain. Really I hadn't expected to think that.

My eyes were still closed, and when I tried to open them I noted that they had hardly budged. Great. Absolutely fantastic. I'm in a freaking coma. I think. Not good.

Next I noticed was a beeping sound. Like... those... something's in a hospital that shows your blood pressure or heart rate or something close to that. Well, that did confirm I was alive... I'd hope.

Among those two things, was another more obvious one. I felt like absolute shit. I ached all over, nothing felt right, my hands and feet were numb, and there was some lump on my butt that I could feel while I laid there, assessing what I could before opening my eyes. Or at least attempting to.

Oh God, how long have I been out? Weeks? Months? Am I just emerging from a coma or something?

I can check one thing off my list of worries; I'm not in a coma. I managed to open my eyes for a brief second, if even only a little bit. I guess I was just incredibly worn out or... something. I dunno, but I still felt like absolute shit. Among the numbness and weird lump on my butt was the feeling that my face was kinda feeling a little off... something wasn't right. Shouldn't where I sniff be higher?

Oh God, I must look awful! Well that's a first: caring what I look like. But I'll admit... I was a bit concerned about that. I may have not been the most attractive guy around, but I didn't want to get worse!

I managed to open my eyes again, and this time kept them that way, granted with some effort. The room I saw around me was your standard hospital room, or what I think a standard hospital room is, and surely enough the beeping machine was to my left. To the left wall was a window with closed shades, preventing me from seeing outward. Probably for the best. To my right, a curtain blocked what must be another side of the room. Hmm, wouldn't be the first time I had a room like this.

Hold on a second though, what was that in the upper portion of my vision? A bandage? That's an odd colored bandage... I didn't think they used bright yellow ones! Aren't they normally a more skin-like color?

I turned my head slightly, and to my surprise the bright yellow bandage bounced a tad. What? Ok, whose the sucker who wrapped my upper head with them? They did a terrible job! They're loose!

I turned my attention to the lower portion of my vision. Right in the middle of it was this... dark... purple... thing. I turned my head slightly and it didn't move. So I also had something stuck in my eye? No... that couldn't be right... I would have noticed something like that. Perhaps the doctor could tell me what was going on?

It probably should have clicked to me instantly what was happening... or rather, what had happened. And what was the case now.

Author's Note

What a way to go. Oh, and so close to completing Driver's Ed part 1, too!

News Flash! You're a Pony

It was probably just moments after I asked "Perhaps the doctor could tell me what was going on" that I heard and saw the door knob rattle and begin to turn. I suppose these doctors really knew when their patients awoke, huh? And then I saw who - no, what - walked in.

My jaw, if it were physically possible, would have dropped to the floor right then. In walked, of all things, a pony. What?

I'm hallucinating, I told myself, the doctors have me on some serious drugs. Oh if only that were true.

"I see you're finally awake." The pony, apparently a guy, said, stopping at the edge of the bed.

I just stared at him. It was incomprehensibly difficult to convince my brain that he was just a person and my eyes were lying to it. As I would soon discover, my eyes had not exactly deceived me.

"How are you feeling?"

"Am-" I stopped right there. That wasn't my voice that just spoke. Ok, what weird shit do you have me on, doc?!

"M-my v-voice..." I croaked, not because my neck was sore or dry, but because it hurt to hear my... feminine... voice? Oh shit. Don't tell me-

"What's wrong with your voice, Ms. Heart?" He asked- wait, Ms. Heart?! I think my heart just leapt up into my throat.

"M-ms. H-heart?" Oh God... don't tell me-

"Yes, Ms. Hear-" He stopped mid-sentence and his eyes widened. Oh no.

"Ms., how much do you remember?" He asked me.

Well, shit.

"Uhhhhmmmm..." I got hit by a semi.

He blinked, then his horn (which I only just noticed) ignited and a clipboard on a nearby table levitated over to him, along with a pen (or was it a pencil?), and the whatever-it-was began jotting down something. Great, he's gonna think I have amnesia. That's not at all what's going on here!

He looked up again and took a breath before asking, "Ma'am, do you remember what happened to you?"

I'm guessing the wrong answer is "I got hit by a semi and got turned into a mare."

"Uhhh... car crash?" I put up my best bad poker face. I was going to sound like a delusional freak.

He looked at me with a legit poker face, though in his eyes I could tell he thought I had lost my marbles. I might have, if I'm seeing ponies.

"Ms. Heart, you were trapped underneath a building collapse. It's a miracle you're even alive." To hell with that. I was hit by a fucking semi truck.

Moving on, knowing it was useless to insist I got hit by a truck, I asked the next thing on my mind. "Doctor... why can't I move my fingers?"

He just blinked at me a few times, and I think he suppressed a laugh. "Ms. Heart, you're a pony; you never had fingers."

"No, no I'm-" I silenced myself when I glanced down to my arms. Or... well... anyways, they were the same color as that dark purple thing at the bottom of my vision. I followed the arm downward until it reached an abrupt ending. I lifted my right arm and my mouth quivered as I observed the fingerless hoof that ended my arm. This wasn't a dream, I then realized. This wasn't the result of a drug. How could a mere hallucinogen make something as surreal as everything I now felt and saw?

I would have tried to calm down. Normally I would. But the brain can only take so much, though.

So, right then and there, I fainted.

When I awoke, I had the false hope I was in a normal hospital room. That hope quickly ended when I noticed the light yellow - I suppose they're not bandages - things in the corner of my vision, and the dark purple thing at the lower center of my vision. The doctor had apparently left, leaving me alone in the room. I think. Maybe there was another pony behind the curtain.

This time, I took numerous deep breaths, and tried to clear my mind.

Alright, so you're a pony now in a hospital, and who-knows-where. Get your priorities straight. What do we need to know right now?

I pondered a few seconds before noticing there was a bathroom. I glanced to my left and saw the beeping machine, though now it was off. Perhaps the physical part of my recovery was over. I silently sighed and looked at the bathroom again.

The dreaded part of most human-turned pony stories on FiMfiction... first steps as a pony. Except now, I'd actually have to do the walking, and this was the real deal. I had to accept the fact that I was most definitely going to be face-planting more than once today.

The first thing I did was take the bedsheets off of me. That exposed me to the sight of my lower parts. I shuddered.

Mini-me's gone. I shed several tears to this revelation, and I had to fight back the urge to scream out my hatred for the universe. What sadistic being would do this to a person? And of all people, why me? I didn't deserve this!

After a few breaths, I resumed my struggle out of bed, flailing my foreign limbs a bit before eventually rolling out of the bed, landing with an ungracious thud.

"Ow..." I didn't dare continue speaking. It was horrifying enough to not speak with my own voice with one word, let alone a full sentence.

Then I ran into a new problem. How the hell am I supposed to walk? I merely glanced at my four unfamiliar limbs and knew that I wasn't going to have a fun time. I had to try, though.

One hoof forward later, and I reckoned I had it covered. Wrong. I moved another hoof, and then face-planted.

Fuck my life, I inwardly complained.

A few seconds of grumbling later, I unsteadily managed to get on all fours again.

Think, John, think! How does an equine go about walking? I thought back to all the four-legged things I had ever seen move. One came to mind that moved slowly enough to recall the order of steps taken forward: an AT-AT. Of all things, I never expected a gigantic mechanical weapon of war to actually aid me in real life. Wait... could I even call- yes, this was real. I already established that.

Alright, just... right forward first, then back left. Then forward left, followed by back right. Got it? No, legs, wrong order! GAH! I face-planted. Again.

This is so much harder than I ever thought. Another few moments of grunting later, I was on my hooves again.

Again, forward right, then back left. Ok, good... so far... now forward left, and back right... aha! Got it! ... Well shit, walking's an accomplishment now...

Another five grueling minutes later (or so it felt like), I finally entered the restroom, and after failing five times to turn the light on, I gazed into the mirror.

Holy... shit... I could hardly think. What returned my stare in the mirror was... I just... I mean, it looked like the picture Five Score Divided by Four uses as its cover art! Granted... I wasn't Rainbow Dash... and also apparently wasn't a pegasus... and also had a quite different color scheme and mane/tail styles. Now, where do I even begin describing my appearance?

Let's start with the eyes!

... first off, they're beautiful. The part that was white was utterly white; I didn't see a single flaw in the color! It... was almost disturbing. My eye color had definitely changed. Before... whatever happened, I had brown eyes. Now they... they were a dark green. I just... they had the brighter part near the lower part of the iris... just... and it all looked real! There wasn't a cartoonish or flat look to anything... it was... all solid... real. I could see some of the individual hairs on my dark purple coat and bright yellow mane!

And speaking of my mane - heh, never thought "my" and "mane" would go next to each other - , it just... damn. The majority of it was hanging down on my right, and I had bangs that went to the left side of my head and nearly touched the left ear, then went downwards and ending... somewhere near where my... is it shoulder? I dunno, somewhere near the socket where my left foreleg attaches to my body. The rest of my mane, on the right side, ended roughly at the same place.

Other than that mane style, the eyes, and coat and mane color, I looked like your average, everyday- wait a minute! Cutie Mark!

I turned my body to the right, turning my head slightly left to look straight into the reflection, and now I could see my... flank. The Cutie Mark itself I can't say I recognized... actually, I had no idea what the hell it meant about my special talent. What was it? A heart. But more than just a simple red heart.

You know the Hot Wheels logo? And how that flame part runs off the tire as if it were on fire, and flame runs to the right? Well, replace the tire with a red heart, and there's my Cutie Mark. For once in the entirety of ever, I actually cared about what a Cutie Mark meant. What did it mean? More importantly... what significance did it have, if any? I mean, what exactly does a Cutie Mark like that give you? And now that I think about it, why am I caring this much?

I sighed and focused in on the reflection once more. One thing was for sure: I'm a pony. More specifically a mare. And what was also certain?

I really wished being high as fuck was the reason for this nightmare.

Author's Note

There we go! A look at what our soon-to-be Equestria's savior is now! Any guesses as to what the Cutie Mark means?

Diagnosis and... wait, I'm what?!

Author's Note

Well, here's an update. Finally. More is on the way, don't anyone worry.

Diagnosis and... wait, I'm what?!

I'm not honestly sure how long I stared at my reflection. Even after what must have been whole minutes of study, I couldn't believe any of it. Any action I took, the mirror reflected it flawlessly. If I breathed in, wherever the hell my lungs are would fall (because my lungs appear to be under me now). If I involuntarily flicked an ear, or my tail, the mirror would do that right as I did. I... I can't really express, in words, how bizarre it is to watch a reflection of something you know isn't you perfectly copy everything you do.

My entranced state ended rather quickly when I heard rapid hoofsteps coming from behind the door. I had to get back to the bed, fast!

I turned away from the mirror and started for the bed, and got just out of the bathroom before falling flat on my face. I need to learn to walk without needing to think about it, badly!

Through some divine intervention or something, I managed to get into the bed and put the covers over me like they were earlier before the hoofsteps stopped at the door.

"Out of my way, doctor!" A frantic voice yelled from behind the door.

"Sir, please, calm dow-" What-I-recognized-as-the-doctor's-voice said.

"I have to see her! I have to see if my wife is ok!" A lump formed in my throat right then. W-wife? He- he wasn't talking about m-me, was he? No, m-maybe it was the patient nearby. It had to be.

"Sir, please, your wife... sir... she may be experiencing some form of amnesia." There was a few moments of dead silence following the doctor's words. I could only imagine the horrified expression on the one dude's face.

"WHAAT?!?!?!" I had to wince at the volume of the guy's scream.

I can understand you being aghast, pal, but this is a hospital. Tone it down a bit.

"Sir... she doesn't appear to recall who she is."

I know perfectly well who I am! ... and I'm a guy, jacka- ... oh, right.

Again, there was a few moments of silence. There was literally a complete lack of sound for about five seconds. And there was me just sitting in a hospital bed, praying to that-guy-who-should-be-listening that they didn't walk in through that doo-

"The best I can recommend is that you should surround her with familiar things and faces for a while. It's usually a very short temporary thing and might last a few days. If she's still like this past then, call a therapist." Great. A therapist is the last thing I need. They'll get me utterly nowhere and gain me nothing but irritation. I don't think my situation can be solved by therapy, doc. Then again, I never told him... probably wouldn't believe me anyways, and would dismiss it as some form of disorder.

"I- I can still see her, right?"

"Like I said, she won't remember you, so please try not to be surprised when she doesn't. She's only just gotten past the physical recovery." Uh oh.

Right at that moment, what I presume to be the unfamiliar voice walked in through the door as it opened. He didn't look anything special, just your average ordinary background pony that served no real purpose in the show. Canary yellow coat, plum purple mane and tail, and I had yet to determine his eyes and Cutie Mark; he was moving too fast.

"D-Daisy?" He stammered, looking at me with a pleading hope.

All I could do really was stare at him. I didn't want to set him off by saying something he doesn't want me to say... but from the look that quickly came across his face, staring at him without saying a word wasn't helping him at all.

He walked closer, allowing me to determine his eye color, but still not his- why did I even want to know? I was staring at his butt in my search for that blasted Cutie Mark, and the fact that I was actually looking there purposefully was starting to weird me out. I mean, I know ponies are naked by default, sort of, but staring at someone's butt still didn't feel right. Moving on, his eyes were a red color, kind of like a strawberry.

He stopped right next to the bed, and laid a hoof on my left foreleg (the same side of the bed he approached me from), and proceeded to stare straight into my eyes, as if scanning my soul. It wasn't a feeling I enjoyed.

"D-Daisy? Daisy Heart?"

"I... I don't know who you are." I regretted having said that. Almost immediately he teared up. I, myself, felt incredibly terrible about all of it. I very well just wrecked this dude's life. I probably already destroyed whoever 'Daisy Heart' was. I was accidentally a murderer.

I mean, 'Daisy Heart' is probably dead, right? Died in whatever it was these ponies say she got in? Maybe I didn't kill her after all, and I just... took over since her body didn't have an occupant anymore. That... still felt wrong, though. I'm not complaining or anything, but I shouldn't even be alive right now... why am I here right now? I certainly don't recall buying anything from some weirdo merchant at Something-Con. I never went to one of those anyways.

"It's a temporary thing, sir. She'll have her memories back within the week." The doctor spoke up.

The on-the-verge-of-crying dude looked over at him. The fact that 'Daisy Heart' wouldn't remember anything for a while still hurt him. I still, honestly, felt bad for the guy. I didn't want this any more than he did.

"When you're ready to leave, head on out. But first, wait outside please so I can determine which kind of amnesia she has." Oh fuck.

With a sniff, the dude nodded and then left the room, the door being magically closed behind him by the doctor. It was then an uncomfortable silence filled the room, and that certainly wasn't helping me stay calm.

"Alright, so I'm just going to ask a few questions, Ms. Heart. Or would you prefer Daisy?" He got closer to the bed and stopped a few feet from it.

"Um... I-I really don't mind..." Quite frankly, I didn't. It wasn't my name.

"Ok, first questi-"

"Your second, actually." I interrupted.

He gave me an irritated stare before resuming. "As I was saying... do you remember even the slightest bit of anything?"

I stared at him and down at the floor several times in the next half minute. I knew exactly what had happened. I remembered everything, beginning as far back as I can remember... which was probably when I was four or five years old. The only problem... was he wouldn't believe a word I said.

"Doctor... I... you wouldn't... believe me... if I... told you." The reason I spoke not so fluently as usual was because... well, I was starting to be frustrated with how I sounded. I'm a guy, not some woman... I mean mare! The less I talked, the happier I was, because that way I didn't have to hear a voice that wasn't my own speak for me. Wouldn't you start getting at least a tiny bit ticked off after a while of that? I know I enjoyed my own voice far more than what I now had.

"Don't be afraid to speak your mind, Ms. Hear-"

"That's not my name." I growled.

The doctor almost looked a little surprised that I interrupted him so harshly, but then put his poker face back on. "If your name is not Daisy Heart, then what is it?"

I swallowed. He was hiding it, but behind that poker face of his I knew he thought I was crazy. To him, of course I'm 'Daisy Heart!' What more proof could he have other than what sat before him? But what was true on the outside was not so on the insi- actually, fuck, it was true on the inside, but it wasn't true in my head! Why did I have to open my big mouth?

"J-John. M-my name is John." I almost broke into a sweat saying that. Congratulations, myself, you just got yourself tossed in the looney bin!

Stop being irrational. Obviously they wouldn't do that because they think-

"Ma'am, you've developed Dissociative Amnesia." That.

"That fast of a diagnosis?" I couldn't help but ask.

The doctor sighed and he seemed to hang his head a little. "Unfortunately, this sort of thing seems to be happening quite often, of late."

"Oh?" Ok, if I thought I cared about anything before, I cared a lot more now. Happening quite often? So... I wasn't the only one? ... did Tyler and the instructor end up here, like I did? Or... maybe there's more to it than that? Of course there is... why wouldn't there be?

"But hopefully your own problems end within the next few days, like most cases before the most recent ones have." With that, he turned towards the door, and opened it, revealing that one guy again.

"Alright, I'll have her ready to go in a little bit. Like I said, surround her with familiar ponies and belongings and she should regain her memories. If she continues like this beyond almost a week, call a therapist." Therapists will be called, it seems.

"Y-yes doctor. Th-thank you doctor."

"Nurse!" The doctor hollered down the hall. What, did everypony forget that this was-

... Hold on, what did I just think?

"Yes?" Responded a female voice.

"If you could get Ms. Heart ready to leave the hospital, that'd be great."

Hold up. If 'Daisy Heart' is married, why are they calling her 'Ms.?' Were they just so lazy that they decided to forget to say the extra 'is?' ... Why am I complaining? I'm not 'Daisy Heart', so it shouldn't be one of my concerns.

"Yes doctor." Following that, the doctor left, taking that one particularly upset stallion with him, and then in walked a mare I didn't recognize from anywhere. I probably could describe her color scheme right now but-

"Daisy? By Celestia, I haven't seen you in a long time." Uh oh.

"Um, yeah, er, long time no see?"

"No kidding! I'm terribly sorry to hear about the accident."

"Um, yeah, wasn't fun being in... do I know you?" Shit, there I go again.

The nurse stared at me with a blank expression for a good half minute or so, and I was worried I broke her for a little while there.

"We went to school together... you don't remember that? You don't remember being best-"

"Ahem, well, since you apparently haven't overheard the doctor's diagnosis, I apparently have 'dissociative amnesia.'" I particularly said those last two words with a bit of hate. I knew, for a fact, that was not at all what I had right now.

Once again, she stared at me for a good while before looking down at the floor and getting all sad-looking. "Oh. Well... I... I'm sorry I... I'll just... do my job then and... get you out of here..."

While she did what she had to do, I couldn't resist groaning and gently rubbing my temples (or at least where I think they were). I was going to be having a lot of encounters like this, wasn't I?

Horsing Around

So it was probably about half an hour or so since the nurse got me ready to go. They surely had taken their time getting me out of that place, and I certainly wanted some fresh air. Anyone would after having been what I'd just been through.

It was almost as soon as I walked out of the hospital that it hit me where I was: Ponyville. Unless there's another out-of-place crystal tree in some other place I probably never heard of, but I was willing to bet... well, a lot of money that this was Ponyville. The architecture of the nearby buildings seemed familiar enough, and then I couldn't dream of not noticing the treetops of what could only be the infamous Everfree Forest. You could seriously tell that thing apart from any other forest just by looking at the treetops.

That one dude also came with me. We were silent for about the first few minutes of our walk (which was actually probably ten minutes, since I still hadn't mastered walking), until I decided to break it. Someone had to.

"So, um, it wouldn't set you off any if I, er, asked what your name was, right?" Upon asking that, he stopped and gave me a sad look, before sighing and deciding to flap his gums.

"Yellow Rock." In response to this, I stared at him blankly for a good five seconds, before the right corner of my mouth twitched into a slight grin, and I had to stifle a laugh.

"What's funny?" He asked in an irritated tone.

"N-nothing, it's just... when you learned colors in school, whenever they said the color 'yellow', did you say 'yes,' thinking they were talking to you?" I barely managed to say without losing it. The bemused look he gave me didn't help that struggle at all.

"I can see it now! 'What is this color?' 'Yellow!' 'What did I do wrong now?!'" I practically fell over laughing. Poor dude must have had a miserable early childhood! Class shouts out an answer to a 'what color is this' question and he thinks they're yelling at him! Oh the money I would pay to see that!

I probably rolled around on the ground for a good minute, gaining looks from numerous ponies, but I didn't really care then. The scenario just kept repeating in my head, being a little different and funnier each time. I finally had enough of it and struggled to my hooves again, to which I was greeted by a quite sour look on his face.

"At least I can walk."

"Hey, I'm new to these things, give me a break!" Oops.

Almost instantly he raised an eyebrow, which I then did the next best thing; I put on my best bad poker face.

"U-um, I mean, I don't remember... aheh, well... walking." Man, did his eyes go big. I didn't think pony eyes could get much bigger. How wrong I have been.

"You don't. Remember. Walking?!" He practically shouted in my face.

"Uh, well," I started, rubbing the side of my head which recently felt like it had taken a blaring trumpet to the ear, "Not like... um, this?"

And then he started to grin.

"So... you don't remember going to the restroom, either?" Oh no.

"I, uh, well, aheh, er, um, you uh, see, I..." I'm doomed.

It was then his turn to burst into uncontrollable laughter, and now the ponies that had looked at me funny earlier looked at him. We were going to be known as the insane couple now, weren't we? ... ugh, this was going to take some getting used to, being a mare.

"I'm gonna- ha ha ha - have to buy you- heh ha - adult diapers, aren't I?! AAAHAHAHAHAHAAA!!!" I can't say I'm ashamed of what happened next. To be honest, my patience with the guy was already wearing thin. And what's worse, he wouldn't stop laughing about it. And there was probably only one clear way to end this. For all my fellow bros out there reading this, prepare to wince in pain.

He rolled on his back for an extended period of time, ending his time of rolling around like a madman, and in doing so he exposed his... man-bits. Honestly I didn't see how ponies didn't see that as- nevermind, moving on.

Well, since I was rather fed up right then, with the combined irritations of various unpleasant factors, I probably did the worst thing I could have done in the history of ever.

I stepped on his nuts.

As unsanitary as that was and as much as that grossed me out doing it, I was almost satisfied with the bloodcurling scream that resulted. Now, just to be clear, I didn't stomp on them. That would have led to him losing a lot more than just his sense of humor, and also much more complicated things in the future. Rather, I just lightly tapped them. Unfortunately, since them parts are rather sensitive and hooves are not exactly soft, I might as well have stomped on them. Fortunately, no blood was spilt, so I at least knew I didn't pop something. Oh God, I'm hurting myself just thinking about this.

I'm sure in some dark recess of my mind I was laughing my head off at the wailing stallion on the ground, but I was almost as hurt as he was just watching him roll around in teared agony. Granted probably about one-millionths of a percentage of the pain he was in, but I was still suffering right along with him. And I had a dawning suspicion I was going to regret doing what I just did. In fact, I already was.

Ack! Ew, gross! I touched another guy's... blech! Is there sanitizer around here?!

I do believe it was about a whole five minutes or so before he stopped crying, at which point I had the audacity to go up and ask him, "You ok?"

I didn't receive an answer. Well, actually, I did. If taking a hoof to the face counts. The impact almost knocked me out cold, sending me flying back probably a good ten feet or so.

I'm not sure how to describe getting hit in the face by a hoof. I can't really relate to whatever comparison I give. Nonetheless, I'd say getting a hoof to the face is like slamming a brick into your face. Both hurt like absolute hell, but one hurts worse because Earth Ponies. And Yellow was an Earth Pony. And apparently being an Earth Pony gives you ridiculous amounts of strength. Particularly in the hooves.

When I once again got to my hooves, a look in his direction revealed that he now angrily stormed over to me. Unfortunately for him, I somehow managed to nail him in the face with both my hind hooves. Somehow. I don't know how I managed to pull that one off.

As expected, he went flying back a few feet, before shaking it off (how?!) and then full-on head-charging me. It was in that moment I also learned that a pony didn't have a big head for looks. Seriously, that thing might as well be a fucking rock. Well... I could say the same about a human skull, but... I think a pony's head is harder. I can't say for sure, though.

He tackled me to the ground and proceeded to land a hoof where I think my stomach is or was as a human. I felt a large amount of air leave me as the hoof hit, and about as soon as he raised his foreleg to make another strike, I rolled into him and forced the two of us into a series of rolls, until finally we came to a stop with me laying on the ground on my back, and he standing over me with a victorious smile and a mean look in his eye. We locked gazes for a few moments, saying nothing as we let our eyes speak for us, and then the last thing you'd expect to happen happened: we laughed.

We both, at the same time, broke into a fit of hysterical laughter. I laughed because I realized that I had actually just wrestled a pony, which sounded absolutely crazy. And he laughed because... well, who knows? I stopped laughing first, primarily because I then realized... I was laying on the ground... and he was on top of me... and our pelvic areas were awfully clo-

"GAH!" I freaked and flipped him off of me, rolling onto my belly and looking over at him to catch him hit the dirt with a thud, after which he looked at me with a surprised expression on his face. And then he laughed again. And I joined him in laughter. That time, I had no idea why I was laughing.

Reminds me of that one time back home in the early part of the school year. I was in class and I guess someone said something that tickled me in a funny way, because next thing I knew I was laughing and crying at the same time.

'What's wrong?' The teacher had asked, and I replied by saying, 'I don't know!' That random outburst set the rest of the class into a kind of awkward silence, followed by some 'I can't believe that just happened' and the teacher telling me I was crazy. I think I finally crossed the line of insanity.

He recovered first, shaking any dirt he collected after landing and then lending me a hoof, which obviously got me back on all fours. We exchanged an awkward smile before we giggled for just a second. Well, I giggled and he chucked.

"We should get on home. The kids have been worried since the accident." He said, then resuming his walk.

I followed him for about five seconds before stopping dead in my tracks. "Wait, kids?!"

Meeting the Kids

Yellow Rock stopped and turned almost as soon as I had shouted. "Yes, kids. We have kids."

That was it. I fell back on my haunches and stared down at the ground. The news hit me hard. Not only was I now a mare, AND married, but I also had KIDS! ... It's like the universe decided to particularly screw with my life. I had read plenty of Human in Equestria stories on FiMfiction, but this? This has to be the most unexpected of all of them, and this time it's a real-life story! And I was living it!

Quickly, a thought entered my mind. One simple word. Discord. He was the guy of unexpectedness! Why just stick some poor sucker in some pony's body when you could stick some poor sucker in a MARRIED pony's body? Totally not what most would expect. I sure didn't.

"Hello, anypony in there?" I snapped out of thought to find Yellow waving a hoof in front of my face.

"I... I'm sorry, I just..."

"Don't apologize. You don't remember right now. I think things will quickly come back to you once you see the kids and hear their voices." ... what would he do when he found out I never was his wife? What would he do if my assumptions were right, and 'Daisy Heart' was merely dead and I now occupied her body? I... ugh, the complicatedness of it all!

"Yeah... maybe..." I was thinking ahead then of what him discovering the truth would mean to him. He'd be devastated, and likely infuriated that an imposter had continued living on in his wife's guise. His kids... I... they'd be growing up without a mother... how old were they, anyways? I suppose it didn't really matter... older-than-I-thought or young, it wouldn't take away the fact that someone completely unfamiliar to them was living in the familiar face of their mother.

We resumed our walk through Ponyville, passing by numerous buildings and ponies, many of which would wave at us and a few of them would come up and tell me that they were glad I was out. Pretty much everypony that waved or passed us I didn't recognize, most likely them being a background pony or something of the like.

Wait... I did it again, didn't I? I said pony instead of one. The hell's with that?

"Do you remember this place?" Yellow's voice tore me out of thought, and I stopped walking, and looked to find him staring at a particular spot on the road.

"Uh, no."

"It's where we first met." Oh no. He was trying to make me remember things I never did.

"Oh?"

"We were just young little foals. We didn't have our Cutie Marks then. I was playing a game of tag with my other friends when I unwittingly ran into you right there." He pointed at a particular spot on the road, for emphasis.

"You were just moving into Ponyville with your own family then. I apologized, and you did too, and one thing led to another and we became best of friends. We went to school together, we grew up together... when we became teens, we started dating. Our first kiss was, heh, at your house, actually. Your father was on me faster than Rainbow Dash can fly." He continued on to tell me about all the 'good times' Daisy Heart and he had together. He would tell me about their dates and how sometimes a certain somepony would enter the scene and things would comically go downhill from there. And all the while I did my best not to outwardly express my growing concerns.

Daisy Heart, whoever she might have been, meant a lot to this guy. Obviously, because otherwise they wouldn't have gotten married. He just kept adding on to the list of things the two had done together, and with each addition I would ever so slightly start feeling worse and worse. I could only imagine how miserable the guy would be if he realized I... if he found out the truth.

"You don't remember any of that?" Once again, his dialogue brought me back to... should I call it the real world? I wasn't sure what was real anymore.

"I... I wish I did, Yellow Rock. I wish I did." No, not really. I didn't want to be involved in somepony else's marriage, and I certainly didn't want to get lovings from another guy, and- oh bloody hell, I did it again! Ugh, it's this pony body, isn't it? I must have not only been put in Daisy Heart's body, but in her brain as well. That would explain it. I think.

He looked down again, for a brief moment, before looking back over at me. "Come on, I'm sure more familiar faces and voices will bring your memories back."

We continued walking the streets for a few minutes before he spoke again. "I do hope you find something familiar along our walk. We've had some funny memories in this particular area."

He was right, sort of. The place was familiar. But not in the way he wanted. Reason? I knew this particular area from the show. Sugarcube Corner was not far away. And damn, I could smell the goods even from all the way out here. Made me want to go over there.

"Familiar?" He asked, now standing in front of me with a grin on his face.

"Y-yeah. How could I not recognize Sugarcube Corner?" With that, he seemingly jumped for joy. I suppose I can't really blame him, but unfortunately, I didn't recognize it because I'd been there. Maybe... I should have said no.

"This is great! Already you're remembering at least something! The doc was right, it's only gonna last a short while!" Without warning, he embraced me in a tight hug.

"Um, that's great and... all, but... you're kinda... weirding me out here. And I'm running out of oxygen..." After a second, he let go, then looked awkwardly in the other direction for a moment, giving me time to regain my breath.

"How about we get home before you kill me for real?" I suggested, to which he chuckled a bit.

"Yeah. We should." He resumed walking.

I didn't necessarily hesitate to follow him. I didn't have anywhere better to go. Where was there to go, anyways? I doubted that there was a single pony, and this time I mean to say that word, in Equestria that knew how to fix my current predicament. Princesses? Maybe they did, but last I checked Canterlot sat on a mountain, and the only way to get there if you're an Earth Pony is by train. And a train ticket, like on Earth, probably cost some amount of money. Money... I didn't have.

"We're here." Damn, that was fa- oh wait... we weren't far from the house to begin with.

The house itself wasn't anything special. Pretty much your generic house of Ponyville. I honestly didn't see how these ponies even could tell their houses apart. Maybe it was because I didn't study each individual house on the way...

Yellow walked to and pushed open the door, and instead of heading in he stood to the side and motioned inside with a hoof. "Mares first." He said with a smile.

Thanks for the reminder. With a sigh, I walked inside, to find quite the surprise inside. No, sorry, as much as I'm sure all the readers would enjoy me finding Pinkie Pie inside with a crowd of ponies attending a surprise party for me, that's not what was inside. In fact, the surprise came running from a hallway somewhere within that very house.

"MOMMY!!!" Two childish voices, one male and one female, exclaimed, and moments later two tiny ponies came around the corner and lunged straight into me.

I stared at the both of them for a good moment, my jaw effectively hitting the floor (of course not literally, otherwise I'd have hit the tiny children), before I, moments later, turned to face Yellow and gave him an expression that I hoped read 'help me'. I guess my attempt paid off, as he walked over and looked down at the small children.

"Kids, could you please release your mother and sit down for a moment?" Yellow asked them.

The two children glanced nervously at each other (after releasing me), and then sat on their rumps just feet away from us.

"Kids... your mother has amnesia." You wish, pal.

"What's amn-eee-shuh?" The filly asked. Damn, that adorable voice of hers...

"It's when somepony forgets things... and can't remember them for a while. Kids... your mother doesn't remember who she is... or who you are. Who we are." Almost perfectly, the two tiny children gasped at the same time, and if I thought I was feeling bad already, I just got even worse.

"But! She's going to get better... eventually. What I know will help is if you kids told her your names so she can hear your voices, and hopefully remember some other things." Something that wasn't gonna happen. How could I remember something I never lived through in the first place?

The little filly stepped forward just enough to get a few inches closer to me, looking up at me with these adorable eyes that- ah! Ahhhh!!! It burns! The cuteness! Too much!! Aaaarrrrggh!!!!

"I'm Amber Lilly," she said, "something you should already know." Perhaps now is the time I describe the adorable little thing?

Ok, so anyone who might be reading this probably knows what I, or a.k.a. Daisy Heart looks like. Ok, well, this filly isn't that much different. Her mane and tail are roughly the same color, granted a slightly darker yellow (though near impossible to notice this upon first glance). Her eyes and coat are where you notice the difference. Her coat is a light purple color, same as her eyes. A quick glance at her flank (child predator alert!) revealed she was a blank fl- ... she had no Cutie Mark. Not that it mattered... she's still absolutely adorable.

"I'm Crimson Vision." The colt said, staring up at me with concerned violet-colored eyes. I just stared down at him, looking at his dark purple coat (which was a little less dark than mine, but not much less) and crimson red mane and tail, and once again to the flank that revealed him to have no Cutie Mark... again, not that it mattered. To me.

"How long are you not going to remember me, mommy?" Amber asked me, and my gut dropped (I felt worse) at the question.

Any doubts I had about all this craziness being real vanished right then. A small filly had just called me 'mommy'. An adult stallion had told me how 'we' had apparently grown up together, and later got married. Everypony around me, it seemed, believed I had some form of amnesia. I... I couldn't not believe it any more than I already did.

Apparently, as I would soon discover, that wasn't the only thing that would be hard to believe. And it too, would be real.

First Night in Equestria

I can't say much happened after I met the tiny children. What would end up happening is that Yellow Rock suddenly had a 'oh' moment, and excused himself to go make us dinner. It was about right then that I hoped I hadn't been the primary cook around here, and he wasn't the type to burn orange juice. I know in my household, mom and grandma had been the primary chefs, while my dad and gramps would only cook every once in a while. My dad was excellent at making desserts, and my grandpa was a great maker of breakfast. Unfortunately, none of their cooking prowess rubbed off on me.

In the meantime, the small children dragged me arou- I mean, I followed them around as they gave me an adorable 'tour' of their house. The house layout wasn't all that complicated. Would be hard to make complicated, given the relatively small side of the place. And if ponies were really about waist high, then it was even smaller.

Speaking of size, I found it hard to wrap my head around the possibility that I had just lost nearly half of my height. I had proudly accepted the fact I was taller than most in my family, and I would constantly remind them of this, and would amaze them sometimes with how far I could reach. That part was thanks to my long arms. Height helps too.

But now? I was no taller than any pony around, with the exception of the Princesses and Discord (and not to forget various other individuals who I don't really want to name right now).

Back onto what I originally was going to explain. The kitchen and living room were downstairs, and you couldn't forget a bathroom as well. Upstairs was the kids room, Yellow Rock's (and apparently 'my') room upstairs, a spare bedroom, and lastly, another bathroom. The kids were about to show me what they had in their rooms when Yellow called from downstairs, something about dinner being ready. I swear the kids were secretly pegasi, since they almost literally flew downstairs.

But me? I just walked. Sort of. Going up the stairs hadn't been too much of a problem. The kids had certainly seen to that. But going down them? That was a whole other story. A very short one, because no sooner had I taken a few steps down them that I lost my balance and painfully rolled down them.

I let out a groan of pain after landing, which gained the attention of Yellow, who quickly came to see what happened.

"Daisy, what are you doing on the ground?"

"I fell down the stairs."

"How did you manage that?"

"I haven't... really mastered... walking yet."

"Do you need help getting up?" I almost accepted, but then I realized he could use that to tease me later. I wasn't in the mood, nor ever would be, to be teased.

"N-no, I'll be at the table sh-shortly." He nodded in response and then returned to the kitchen.

I just laid there, briefly, thinking about how much my body would likely protest any movement. And my speculations were quite correct; it hurt like heck.

After probably a minute of agonizing attempts at rising, I managed to get on all fours and limped over to the kitchen, grunting with each breath. Imagine trying to walk with an injured everything while not even having mastered walking quite yet. And you have four legs. And no hands to grab on to anything if you fell. It. Sucks! At that point I was just itching to get even five. Freaking. Seconds of being able to wiggle my fingers and toes. This no-fingers thing was finally beginning to drive me nuts.

With divine luck or something like that, I hobbled into the kitchen and took several moments to get myself in a seat, then gave a tired look at what sat on the plate before me.

"What's this?" I asked, pointing at what looked like a sandwich. I think.

Yellow looked at me with a questioning look before shrugging off whatever was on his mind. "A hayburger."

"A hayburger." I repeat, looking down at the thing and observing the contents. I could definitely see the hay... I think that yellowish stuff was the hay. Was that a bit of ketchup at the top? Lettuce at the bottom? That's all I could really make out...

Everypony else ate on witho- I did again - without me, while I just stared at the strange thing. I know I was a pony and all now, and so I probably could eat hay... but what did hay even taste like? I couldn't help but think how I might taste it as a human, even though that was very unlikely to be the case as a pony. Or perhaps it would taste like I think it would, and instead of me vomiting as my body rejected it, I would actually enjoy the taste. I was more willing to bet that it wouldn't taste like it would if I ate it as a person. Wait... no, human. I'm sorta a person. I am a person. A... pony person. Whatever. I know what I am on the insi- ... yeah, I know what I am on the literal inside (unfortunately), but mentally I knew I was human-person me.

"Are you going to eat the thing or not?" Yellow asked me, and a quick glance at him revealed he was already half finished with his hayburger.

"Uh, y-yeah... just... nevermind." I took a gulp as I glanced back down at the food. Well, here goes nothing.

I reached down with my neck (man it would take some getting used to, eating like a filthy animal) and reluctantly prepared to take a bite, inching closer every passing moment, until I was in biting distance. I gave a quick lick of my lips before taking a bite of the burger, munching on it seconds later and finding myself surprised...

... that it didn't taste awful. Actually, I hardly tasted it at all. The other ingredients (ketchup, lettuce, and something else) kind of masked whatever flavor the hay might have had. But one thing was certain about the hay; it was chewy. Not very chewy, but kind of as chewy as a perfectly cooked piece of hamburger meat. Probably helped with my herbivorous teeth... I'm sure I'd have plenty of fun times checking those out later.

Don't get me wrong, the hayburger was actually good... it just... lacked that wonderful juiciness that is present in hamburgers. Damn, I was really going to miss eating meat. At least I had been able to taste buffalo meat in Michigan's upper peninsula near Whitefish Point before I... before I crashed. No, before Tyler crashed. I always had a bad feeling about that kid.

Anyways, buffalo meat beats your run-of-the-mill hamburger meat anyday. And don't get me started on the delicacy that is Whitefish.

"Savor your next bite while you're at it, will ya?" Yellow sarcastically said from his seat.

I sent him an unamused look before continuing with the hayburger.

So, dinner passed and after a while of nothing interesting happening, it was bed time. Of course, I wasn't going to get much needed sleep without something awkward happening, was I?

We were all upstairs at that point, the tiny children tucked away by Yellow, something they initially wanted me to do but I weaseled my way out of that one. Then, of course, Yellow entered 'our' room, and quickly prepared it for us. Behold the uncomfortableness that began.

He climbed into bed, while I watched from the doorway, and then patted the space next to him with a hoof, looking at me with a- Oh hell no!

"You don't mean-" I started.

"Come join me in bed, and perhaps we'll find ways to reclaim some of your memories." He said, grinning with a naughty look in his eyes.

"Uh, yeah, I'll take the spare bed please." He stared at me blankly for a moment, as if surprised I rejected the offer.

"Dude, I ain't sleeping with a stranger." I deadpanned.

"Would you have married an utter stranger?"

"Well unfortunately for you, I don't 'remember' anything, so you're a stranger right now, and as such I require a separate bed to sleep in." He gave me a cold look, to which I smiled, and quickly he lowered his head and sighed.

"You just got out of the hospital too, so I guess you should get a few days to readjust..." Well, at least I wouldn't have to worry about... sleeping with... some guy... bleh! Done talking about that!

"Well... goodnight, Yellow."

"Goodnight, Daisy. I love ya." Internally, I broke down. Not in tears, but broke down as in DOES-NOT-COMPUTE!!!! That word... love... I knew he meant it nicely but... ack, it almost stings having a complete... stranger...

"Yeah, I... I love you to." That there was a horribly forced 'I love you', and I'm surprised he didn't keel over at how forced it was. It was painfully obvious that I didn't think the same way about poor Yellow. I couldn't help but pity him.

From what I've heard, Daisy Heart and Yellow Rock loved each other a ton. Obviously, because that's the child-friendly way of saying how they had kids. And then, one day, suddenly this... pony who he's loved for quite some time doesn't remember who he his, what they've done together, and just isn't the same... individual as he's used to. That... probably isn't as bad as being on my end of these troubling times, but I can imagine that he's going to be suffering through this whole ordeal right along with me. I had to keep that in mind; I wasn't the only one suffering through this. It was just a shame that... if I spilled the beans about what's really going on inside my head... I'd probably take a rainbow laser to the face.

Ok, so maybe I'm exaggerating on that point. What's definitely sure to happen is it would traumatize Yellow and his family... and that's so much better than taking a rainbow laser to the face.

... That's sarcasm.

I turned and left the room, carefully making my way to the spare bedroom (hooves are terrible things to attempt sneaking with) and making my way over to the bed... and proceeded to look at it with confusion.

It was now my brain decided to get all logical and mathematical and calculated several variables together that basically resulted in 'you can not sleep in that bed.' I know that's exactly what position I had been in earlier this day... with my head on the pillow and everything else just... you know. But my brain then chose to tell me that due to the structure of my pony body, it should be physically impossible for me to sleep, let alone lay, in a bed like I had been earlier again. I probably should have broke something laying like that. Or... if not that, then it should at least be extremely unpleasant to sit like that.

But then I thought... why do I even give a fuck? Clearly if I wasn't in pain while sitting like that, it's ok to sit like that.

So basically I just shrugged off my brain's results, I hopped onto the bed and proceeded to pull the covers back, lay myself in like I normally did back home, then recover myself. After that, I stared aimlessly at the ceiling, finding myself with an inability to fall asleep.

I had so much on my mind, then. My brain's always been like that, thinking the things I wish I would think earlier in the day at night, as I'm sure it's that way for most people. Among my thoughts was regret. Regret that I had gone first in that drive and let Tyler do his drive last. I could have avoided all of this. But instead, him and I chose to let a turn-based system determine who drives first and on what day.

Regret that I had even gone to that drive that day. Regret I never got to... I never got to tell my mom I loved her because she was at work when I went on that drive. I'd never be in the comforting presence of my best friend, who was master of telling stories. There were a lot of things I would never do or see again, like go on a cruise or visit Hawaii, something my mom and I wanted to do when I got older. Eventually I reached a point where the list I had amassed had overwhelmed me, and I began crying.

It was inevitable. I knew it would happen sooner or later. I had to let it all out now, when I could. Well... some of it out. The anger I couldn't release, because that would awaken everypony... and the greater extents of sadness I couldn't release, because then I'd be wailing. Right then, I just sobbed and damped my pillow with tears, curled in a fetal position on my right side...

I ended up crying myself to sleep...

"MOMMY MOMMY MOMMY!!!" Two childish voices awoke me from slumber, then the air left my body as what must have been two heavy body landed on me.

"Bloody hell!" I gasped, followed by the weights rolling off of me, and myself regaining my breath.

"What's so important that it demanded I be awoken so abruptly?" I growled.

"I don't know," Amber cried, turning and starting for the hallway, "But Daddy said we gotta go!"

The two left the room, leaving me to fumble about the semi-damp bedsheets until I face-planted into the floor. Damn, I still had plenty to learn on walking with hooves.

Several grumbles and curses later, I had risen to all fours and glanced curiously at the window. Strange, I know sometimes the morning light was somewhat orange, but the light coming in from the shades was... flickering. I mean, like, it was orange, then yellow-orange, then orange again, red-orange, and then the cycle repeated.

Making sure not to trip over my... literal... two left... hooves... I made my way over to the shades and, with a tug with my mouth (window shades are quite nasty. I barely kept myself from barfing at the taste.), they came down. I had not expected to see what was outside.

The house nearby, and several others, were on fire.

It's Helgen All Over Again

Author's Note

I do apologize for taking so long getting this chapter done, dear readers! I've been doing quite a lot of stuff of late... my initial plans last weekend (22nd and 23rd) to make this then were delayed because my friend decided to pull a surprise 'come stay over overnight' at his house. The few days before that when I may have had time to work on this were full of... other things. Sunday, the day after I got back home, I ended up playing a Sid Meier's Civilization 5 for the whole day (because I finally got it while over at my buddy's house), and so I just was too busy enjoying the game that I didn't work on this then either... I know, excuses, excuses, and terrible ones at that. I know plenty of other authors have so much more important reasons for not publishing chapters but... well, I don't really have those good reasons anyway. Anyways, I hope y'all enjoy this chapter at least somewhat. I know I'm not the best author out there... but I am trying.

It's Helgen All Over Again

I was shocked by this sudden revelation? Ponyville was on fire? What? I... that was unexpected.

It was when the fire leapt over onto Yellow's house that I snapped out of shock and instantly bolted into the hallway. I hadn't even gotten down the stairs and I could hear the screams from outside, and screams from within this own house.

"DAISY HEART!!!!" Came the frantic shout from downstairs, belonging to Yellow Rock.

When I got down, he was at the door with the kids, his expression reading pure panic, and the children were cowering with him, fearing what might come.

"GET THE DOOR OPEN!!! GO GO GO!!!" I shouted, running towards him, and he quickly obeyed and rushed outside, me just behind him and the kids staying close to him.

There was a lot of things to be said about what was going on outside. I shall sum it up to this: Ponyville's in deep shit right now. Ponies ran around the streets, screaming their little heads off. Every building in the direction of Sugarcube Corner was either burning or burnt to almost nothing. Worse, just seconds later, ponies that had been inside houses across the street came rushing outside... and they were on fire. I assume that Yellow tried blocking the kids' eyes while we watched the burning ponies run around, screaming their heads off before falling to the ground and flailing about in their death throes, before falling silent and ceasing to move.

The kids then began crying, Yellow's attempts probably having failed, and I exchanged glances with him.

"Follow me!" I told him, rearing back (you wouldn't believe how incredibly weird that was for me) and starting into a run towards the street near Sugarcube Corner.

I know I said that area was on fire, but the other way was actually worse. And besides, I think the fire stopped not far beyond Sugarcube Corner. I just needed to get over there before the fire did.

The four of us ran a short distance before quickly being joined by several other fleeing ponies, and at about the time we started passing Sugarcube Corner I noticed the Cakes, all four of them, leaving the burning building. However, their path was blocked by large amounts of debris that had probably came from the upper floors, and what few gaps in the rubble there was were too small for all the Cakes to make it out.

"Go," I told Yellow, "Get the kids and everypony else to safety! I have to help them!" I turned to leave but a hoof stopped me.

"Don't go! You might die!"

"And so will they! I need to try!" I broke free of his grip and rushed over to the Cakes. I didn't hear him respond. Instead, only the clopping of numerous sets of hooves.

"Hold on, guys!" I hollered at the Cakes, and they stood back several feet, allowing me to kick away enough of the debris so there was a large enough hole for them. The four then crawled out, their small children first, and they stopped to thank me after all of them were out.

"I thought we were goners for sure!" Mr. Cake said in a sigh of relief.

"It's not over yet! Is there anypony else near here?" I asked him.

"No, everypony else got out! We're the last ones on this street!" He responded.

"Alright, get out of here! You saw where the others ran, right?" He nodded in response.

"Then go! I'll meet up with you guys!" They ran almost as quickly as I told them that.

Me, I gazed further into the burning streets to see if anypony else might be trapped... all I can say is that if they were, they weren't alive anymore. I was about to turn around when there was a heavy thud that shook the ground, and for a moment my heart stopped. Fire. Plus attacked town. Equals... dragon.

I turned around to see-

"MOTHER OF GOD!!"

Oh wait... I said that out loud...

The beast that I now laid my eyes upon had dark brown scales. Its wings were... well, part of them were on the ground, supporting its body because... it only had... two legs... and they were...

Oh my God. It was a Skyrim dragon. No doubt about that... WHAT WERE THEY DOING IN EQUESTRIA?!?!?!?!

But then I noticed why it had landed. It had landed near where I stopped to tell Yellow to run. It had landed... in front of the Cakes.

"YOL..." It said in its booming voice, and then a second later, I watched, with horror, as the thing I would slay all the time in Skyrim murdered the Cakes. Every. Last. One of them.

"NOOOO!!!!" I shrieked, even though my voice was nothing compared to the combined sound of the dragon's fire breath and the deathly screams of the Cakes.

And but moments later, the fire stopped coming from the dragon's mouth, to reveal the charred husks of the four Cakes... which collapsed onto the ground, so burnt they were petrified, and they were frozen that way in their death throes.

And then the dragon looked at me.

"Oh shit oh shit ohshitohshitohshit!!!!" I panicked and turned tail and almost began running... only to stop mid-step and realize there was nowhere to go.

There was another, granted not as hard, thud as the dragon took a step towards me, and I fell back on my haunches, mouth quivering with fear as it got closer and closer, and I could only watch, as that was all I could do. I mean, killing a dragon in a videogame is one thing, but in real life? Don't even try. Especially when you're an Earth Pony.

The dragon stopped so that its face was just inches from mine... and let me just say this... its head was bigger than me. It opened its mouth slightly and gave me a whiff of its horrid breath, which smelled of what can only be described as hell.

It was then that I silently muttered a few prayers, even though I hadn't exactly been that religious. Not only that, but if I had been wearing any pants right then, I would have shit them.

"Nowhere to run, pony." It spoke in its deep and powerful voice, releasing even more of its wretched breath at me.

I'm fucked. Basically all that was to be said of that situation.

"YO-" I'm surprised I wasn't blown away by the sheer volume of his voice. All he had to say was the 'Y' and I could sense my death rapidly approached. And the worst feeling of my entire life, I then decided, was that I was powerless to do anything about it.

Fortunately for me, however, he stopped mid-Shout, and the look in his eye revealed he had just been dealt an unexpected blow. He turned his big ugly head around, and in doing so (because my vision was no longer obstructed), Twilight Sparkle was revealed, standing near the charred bodies of the Cakes, her expression reading something you shouldn't see on the face of an adorable cartoon pony.

Ok, given that she looked much more real. And not as adorable.

"Get. AWAY! FROM HER!!!!" She shouted, blasting the dragon with a beam of magic.

... the fucker didn't even flinch.

"Hi los nid wah zey, malkey." It said, completely having forgotten about me. Not that I was complaining, or anything.

"YOL..." And just a moment later, the same fire breath that had cooked the Cakes struck Twilight.

And it was just when I feared I was truly fucked now, it turned out that Twilight had survived thanks to some shield spell or whatever you'd call it. The dragon growled in irritation at this. But before it could say something, Twilight took to the sky.

... that was something I'd never unsee.

"Hi lorot lok los hin grah-zeymahzin? TOL ENGEIN WAH ZEY!!!" Right after uttering those words, the beast extended it wings and flapped, sending a nearly hurricane-wind speed wave into me, which forced me onto the ground.

And then, moments later, the dragon had left me, chasing after the princess. I didn't exactly sit there and wait for him to return.

I bolted, running towards where Yellow and the others had run... to pause at the charred forms of the Cakes. Any fur or clothing they had on them was gone, and their skin was almost as black as coal. Each of the four bodies was curled in some way, their blackened and charred expressions frozen into that of unbearable agony.

I wanted to have been able to give them a proper burial. I really did. But I had no idea how burials worked here in Equestria... and besides, I needed to get out of Ponyville myself. I'm... I'm sure they'd scour the ruins later to... to do that for the dead.

A terrifying roar from above later had sent me back on my run, following the roadway I last saw Yellow running. Of course, the streets weren't littered with only the remains of buildings. Charred pony corpses were strewn about here and there, largely closer to the houses. I had no idea how high the body count must have been... and neither did I want to think about it.

I continued running, finally getting past the point where buildings were on fire, which was essentially the end of town. Glancing around, there was no sign of anypony... or anyone around. Either that meant they had ran further... or... or...

No, of course it was the former. The dragon was preoccupied with Twilight anyways. She was a madmare. Did... did I really just say that? Yes, yes I did. Well, I guess that's technically correct. Yeah, she's a madmare. Didn't she see her magic didn't even make that thing flinch the second time? I mean, I know she had the Elements of Harmony and all, but... would they even get to use them? The dragon could probably interrupt their rainbow laser thing, right? Maybe? I dunno, perhaps I should have looked more into-

Quickly, I happened across a trio of ponies; an Earth Pony, Unicorn, and a Pegasus. The pegasus appeared to be wounded, but not critically.

"Hey, are you alright?" I asked, trotting up to them.

The Earth Pony, a stallion, turned his attention to me, and in his expression I could see the gears of his head turning as he processed everything that had happened.

"Duke, concentrate and help me here." The unicorn almost yelled, and within a second the stallion went and... held down medical bandages?

The unicorn's horn ignited and some of the medical bandages tore themselves free from the rest and wrapped around the site of one of the injuries, all the while the grounded pegasus clenched her teeth, obviously in some amount of pain.

"What happened?" I asked... well, anyone who could respond.

"We were headed here to stop for the night while on our way back to Canterlot. Scarlet Breeze here decided to charge that... weird-looking dragon. You can see how that turned out for her." She told me that while continuing to bandage Scarlet's wounds. She was good at multitasking, I'd give her that.

"Were you... were you one of the townsponies?" She asked, glancing up at me, briefly, before getting more bandages ready.

I didn't respond, instead looking back at the burning settlement known as Ponyville, thinking back to the horrid demise of the Cakes, and my near-death experience with the dragon. I shuddered at the memories.

"I'm... I'm terribly sorry." She said sincerely, though still focused on Scarlet.

"It's not your fault. Hey, would you happen to have seen a large group of ponies leaving Ponyville?"

"No..." I began to have a sickening feeling wash over me. What if Yellow and the kids hadn't made it? What about all those other ponies? Did... did the dragon get them? No, it couldn't have... it was chasing Twilight...

"The Elements lived here, didn't they? Did you see them at all?" The unicorn asked.

"Only one of them, and she saved my life by making the dragon pursue her." Wow. It now hit me. I was saved by a supposed-to-be fictional character that shouldn't even exist... wow.

She glanced over at Ponyville, and I knew that both she and I hoped that the Elements were ok. Seconds later, we saw something that could mean many things.

The dragon ascended the air above Ponyville, a distant roar echoing as it got higher. And then in a quick, sudden movement, it flew off in the exact opposite direction we were facing, getting smaller and smaller with each passing moment, until I could see it no more.

"I guess the Elements didn't defeat it." I muttered, and the unicorn sighed. I suppose there just wasn't much to say about something like that.

"Why," she asked nopony in particular, "why would that dragon do this? Just why?"

I looked at her, and back at the burning town, and then repeated this a few times before just lowering my head. "It's a dragon. It can do whatever it wants."

"The Princesses will be outraged. I look forward to seeing that motherbucker encased in stone."

"Ruby, despite recent events, could you contain that tongue of yours?" The stallion, Duke, who judging on his voice is probably a lot older than 'Ruby', scolded her.

"Yeah yeah. I kno-" She started.

"She's right to use that foul language," I interrupted, "I watched that dragon... I watched it burn an... an entire family right before my eyes. I..." I had to fight back an urge to cry, my eyes tearing up slightly at the horrific memory.

I had no problem watching the townspeople of Helgen die when I played Skyrim. I had no problem watching a farmer attack a dragon with a knife, only to be killed by being shaken in the dragon's powerful jaws and then flung into the walls of Whiterun. And I certainly had no problem watching a werewolf tear apart a group of men. But that was because that hadn't been real. This time, it had been real, and now there was a problem. A real problem.

As if waking up as a mare wasn't a big enough problem to deal with.

Suddenly, I found myself being hugged by the unico- ... by Ruby. My crying ceased, and I just stared at Duke, and then down at Scarlet, thinking that she literally stopped tending to her friend's wounds to hug me. A complete stranger.

"Um, shouldn't you be-" I started.

"I finished." She cut me off.

She released her embrace and faced me, and we just stared at each other for about half a second. Then she broke the silence.

"I'm Ruby Aurora," she introduced herself, "he's Duke Venture, and she's Scarlet Breeze." She pointed at the respective ponies. Oh crap, I gotta tell her I'm-

"I'm John." I said on instinct.

That should've been end game right there. That should've been the point where the three of them cocked their heads sideways and went 'what kind of a name is that?' There was just one reason why I hadn't accidentally told them I wasn't who I appeared to be.

That wasn't the name that left my mouth. 'Daisy Heart' was.

Ok, what the hell?! I can live with slipping up on someone, or anyone, or anybody, but slipping up on my own name?! That's problematic.

I know there's a ton of stories in the fandom that have this sort of thing. Character goes to Equestria, turns into pony, and then can't say their human name. But yet, I had said if just fine ye- wait. No, I didn't say it just fine. I nearly broke into a sweat. Or did I break into a sweat? Nevermind that. Apparently, I had to use effort to say my human name.

What?

"Good to officially meet you, Daisy Heart. I wish... we had met on more... positive circumstances." I almost didn't hear her. I had been quite busy pondering what my lack of natural ability to say my name could mean. Hopefully, it was a side effect of possessing this... Daisy Heart's body. Hopefully. I could possibly see the Princesses about that problem after the dragon is dealt with. If... it didn't go into hiding.

"Uh, yeah. Good to meet you... too." I said after a few moments of my earlier pondering.

"Look!" Duke suddenly shouted, pointing a hoof towards... Ponyville.

Ruby and I glanced over at the burning town, to find the Mane 6 walking towards us. And... they didn't look very happy. At all.

Pinkie Pie lacked the spring in her step. And her smile. And she looked around everywhere, as if looking for some... pony.

Applejack looked like she was out of breath, and it was then I saw she had Apple Bloom on her back. Big sister instincts probably kicked in, I guess. Other than that, she looked ok.

Rarity's mane was... oh God, it hurt to look at. It was all... messed up. I... I didn't see Sweetie Belle. I hoped that didn't mean... didn't mean she didn't make it. She also limped slightly as she walked.

Fluttershy... well... Fluttershy looked downright terrified. I don't really blame her. She also looked like she had taken a beating. Now that... that's a death sentence. Beating up Fluttershy. No one, and I mean, no one, beats up Fluttershy.

Rainbow Dash... she... she especially looked like... well... shit. She had some minor burn marks along her body and on her- oh shit, her wings were broken. I mean, they were literally bent in ways they shouldn't be. She kept one hoof off of the ground. The pained look on her face said it all.

And then there's Twilight. Her wings were ok, but that can't be said for the rest of her. She had more burn marks than all the ponies combined, and it appeared large chunks of her mane and tail were... singed off. Her horn was, to my surprise, untouched.

Ruby and I rushed over to their aid, and for a moment, the Mane 6 appeared relieved.

"It looks like... we distracted the dragon... for long enough to... save more ponies." Twilight said, gasping painfully with each few words.

"What happened to you girls?!" Ruby asked them.

"We fought it," Rainbow Dash winced as she spoke, "and all we accomplished was cause a distraction for it. If Applejack had... been there, we could've defeated it."

"How did it-" I started.

"I don't know. It... it hardly was affected by my magic... and it was immune to Fluttershy's stare. Not that she... got long to stare at its eyes. It... it launched her into a building with its breath! I've never heard of dragons using that kind of attack. It didn't even touch her! Rainbow Dash was knocked out of the air and sent into a burning building. Thankfully, the fire wasn't everywhere where she landed. Applejack had been at Sweet Apple Acres when it attacked. Pinkie Pie... she, well, even with her... abilities, the dragon just... I'm sorry, I need... we need to sit down." Twilight told us.

They walked a few feet further before plopping down onto the ground, groaning as they did. They must've been exhausted from that... precisely how anyone should be after fighting a dragon. I mean, come on, it's not like the dragon's gonna land so you can cut it to pieces with your sword. I'm talking to you, Bethesda!

"What are we gonna do now?" Ruby asked.

"Head to... Canterlot," Twilight said, "I'm sure the Princesses could help us..."

And then, as if almost on queue, sunbutt herself literally appeared out of nowhere, with her a rather large group of armored ponies.

To Canterlot! ... Oh no

"What is going on here? We could see the fires from Canterlot!" The Princess questioned, Twilight in particular.

"A dragon attacked." Twilight said after several audible gasps.

"A dragon? Has it left?"

"Yes," Ruby spoke up before anypony else could, "we watched it fly off."

The Princess nodded, then turned to one of her soldiers, gave him a nod, and then the unicorn in question ignited his horn, and was gone the very next instant. Man, teleportation would have been so useful when I was still-

"What do you know of this dragon?" The Princess asked.

"Very little. It attacked out of the blue. What we do know is that it's specifically a wyvern, a large one at that, and it's scales are an exceptionally dark berry blue. And... it took one of my most powerful attack spells without even flinching." Twilight told her.

Oh, it was blue? Heh heh, I didn't even notice! Well... can you blame me? Studying its details wasn't exactly a priority when... yeah.

Celestia put a hoof to - wait, I stand corrected, that part just before the hoof - her muzzle, her eyes trailing down as she thought. She then, of course, put her hoof back down. Her eyes locked onto Duke, who quickly noticed this and stood at attention.

"Say, you're that... explorer, aren't you?" Celestia asked, squinting as she, probably, looked through her memory banks of ponies she had seen. That must be a big list...

"Indeed I am, Princess."

"And you were off exploring some ruins near the Everfree, correct?"

"Yes. And... well, I guess I now know what that carved wall meant." He responded, looking back at Ruby and Scarlet.

"What carved wall?" I, the Princess, the Mane 6, and even a few of the armored ponies asked, all at once.

"Deeper in the ruins, there was this ancient carved wall depicting something similar to... what just happened. A dragon had been burning-"

"We get it." Rainbow Dash interrupted him, giving him a quite frustrated look.

"Right. Well, that wasn't exactly all there was..." He trailed off, looking downwards as he recalled whatever he saw.

"And that would be?" The Princess inquired.

Ruby's horn then ignited, and from a nearby satchel-like thing floated a bag containing numerous... photos? Yeah, those were photos. The photos levitated themselves over to the Princess, where quickly the reddish-pink aura was replaced by a golden one. The photos continued over to Celestia, stopping just a short distance from her face, where she eyed them both, squinting in her study of them.

"Indeed there is more... much more..." Celestia agreed, continuing to observe the photos.

"So far, only the... dragon has at all been related to what must be the prophecy. We, unfortunately, have no clues as to who this pony is, or if they're even around right now." Duke said, and the Princess hardly even looked up from the photos, if at all.

"Wait, what pony?" I asked.

"On the wall, there is a special pony mentioned that defeats the dragon. The carving of that pony depicted an Earth Pony... but it gave no clues as to whom that pony was. And for all we know, the pony might be a unicorn or pegasus instead." Duke answered.

All eyes returned to the Princess, who had ceased studying the photos and appeared to be in thought. Something told me... an adventure was imminent.

"My little ponies," Celestia said, "We should investigate this ruin. I do believe we may be able to find something that can help us deal with this dragon. But first, we should head to Canterlot and get you all medical attention." She then turned to the armored ponies.

"Locate any and all survivors. Once you have as many as you can find, relocate them."

The armored ponies saluted, then turned and ran off in the direction of Ponyville. Celestia faced us again, then ignited her horn. Wait, oh shit, we're gonna teleport!

I can't say I had very much time to act before suddenly, with a flash, we were no longer outside Ponyville.

Now we were outside a large building, and without needing to look around I could see that we were in a street in... Great Scot! I was in Canterlot!

That was probably the last thing I thought before suddenly feeling very queasy. I had the slightest feeling that I might need to vomit. What was that all about?

I stood there, trying to stop myself from vomiting in public as the Mane 6 entered the large building, which was actually a hospital. Duke and Ruby entered as well, helping Scarlet inside. Princess Celestia had given me a look, noticing I was looking rather miserable.

"Something wrong?" She asked.

"I don't feel so good..." I tried making it not sound like a whine, but my female voice certainly didn't help me any.

"Oh, you must not have teleported before..." She realized.

"No shit, Sherlock!" I almost yelled at her.

I was almost too sick to care that she had actually taken on a very surprised expression. I sure bet she hadn't seen that one coming. She, of course, quickly shook her head and put the matter aside. I'm sure I'd hear plenty of that later.

"Other than feeling sick, are you alright?" She asked.

"Y-yeah. Perfectly fine." I did just survive a dragon attack, and all...

After that, we silently stared at each other for a few seconds. Me, I couldn't think of anything to say to the literal goddess standing before me. Even the part of me that should be incredibly excited to be in her presence was awfully quiet. And her... well, I bet she was wondering why I didn't grovel at her feet like pretty much everypony else in this country.

"Excuse me, I shall go check on our friends." She finally said, turning and walking inside. Fine by me.

I was almost all too happy to stay out there. I mean, I was in Canterlot. The Canterlot! That I was in a city built on the side of a mountain excited me. The view had to be spectacular, especially now that I could see it in real life! And speaking of views, the night sky never was very interesting to look at in the show... I wonder what it really looked like. Obviously this wasn't Earth, so they must have an entirely different set of constellations! I think I'm about to nerdgasmmm!

My happy pondering was swiftly ruined when my brain decided to remind me of today's events. Hell, it wasn't even lunch time and-

My stomach growled almost instantly. I haven't had anything to eat yet! All this excitement has... has...

I glanced down the crowded street and back at the hospital a few times. They wouldn't mind if I left to get a quick bite, would they? I mean, it's not like they'd be leaving that place soon. Broken wings obviously can't heal very quickly. Or at least, not fast enough that I'll be missed for an hour. Right?

My stomach won over my mind, and I turned my ba- no wait, tail to the hospital and started down the street... only to realize, seconds later, I didn't know where any of the restaurants were. Perhaps I should ask around?

Fairly quickly, I noted a unicorn stallion headed my way... one of those stuck-up Canterlot ponies, if his clothing had anything to say about him. But then, I didn't really care. If my stomach wasn't happy, I wasn't happen.

"Excuse me, sir," I ran up to him, and he upon realizing he was being addressed he raised an eyebrow, "But could you point me towards the nearest restaurant? I haven't had anything to eat today."

The stallion eyed me, as if debating with himself over things I probably didn't care to know, before he gave me a slight smile. "Actually, I was just heading there now. Care to join me?" If that means free food, then yes!

Perhaps I should just mention that he had that incredibly British accent most Canterlot ponies possessed? Yeah, not that it said anything about him, but perhaps just a thing to mention. I'll get to describing his appearance in just a bit.

"Sure, that'd be great." I agreed.

He then resumed walking, and I wasn't slow to follow him. We hardly got even ten steps from where we met when he spoke up.

"So where are you from? You must be new around here." He maintained eye contact with me as he spoke.

I hesitated for roughly three seconds. "P-Ponyville." The word alone brought back the terrible memories.

He stopped then to turn and face me completely, his eyes now showing nothing but pity and concern. "Oh, I'm... I'm terribly sorry, I... I didn't know..."

"Please, I'd rather not talk about it." I told him.

I suppose that even Canterlot ponies had hearts. Perhaps because a tragedy like that tended to get through even the stuck-up. At least he wasn't unfazed by it.

"Then we shall not. A good meal will hopefully cheer you up." He flashed me a hopeful smile at that last bit, then turned again and resumed walking. I hung back a few seconds before joining him in his walk. I could see where this was going. Guy meets girl. Girl just suffered the loss of her hometown. Guy buys her a meal. One thing leads to another and they love each other. Sorry, not how this man... mare (as it would now seem), operates!

I didn't mention that right then, though. The second I had the dawning suspicion he was into me, I'd break the news. Sorry, I'm taken.

A lump also formed on my throat then. What if Yellow Rock and the kids hadn't made it out after all? Wouldn't that mean I was... I wasn't... taken? He had to be alive, every bone in my body told me so, but just what if...?

I had to resist the urge to shake my head at myself. It didn't really matter, no matter what was the case, I wasn't into guys! Nor would I ever! The chances of anything... special happening between us were absolutely, positively ZERO. ZE! RO! You hear me, universe?! ZERO!!

Even with the conflict raging in my head, our walking resumed in silence, save for the clopping of our hooves on the paved street, the chattering of other ponies, the slight breeze, and the faint hush of a waterfall. Maybe that slight breeze wasn't actually slight, though. I was covered in fur, after all. Maybe I would naturally be freezing up here if I were still a human?

Don't be ridiculous. We're not that high up the mountain. Right? There isn't any snow gathered in piles here and there, after all. We can't be that high up.

Eventually we stopped just outside a building, where I could quickly smell the mouthwatering delicacies that inevitably-

My daydreaming stopped right as I remembered that I could eat meat. And they probably didn't serve it, either. So, my fantasy, right then, of sinking my teeth into a hot, juicy, undeniably delicious steak abruptly ended. That I probably would never eat meat again almost made me shed a tear. I love meat...

"We're here. Mares first?" He motioned for me to go inside.

I resisted the urge to glare at him and walked through the entrance, to be greeted by the smell of... everything that wasn't meat. Damn it, brain, stop thinking about it!

A waiter, who was standing at one of those podiums waiters generally stand at when waiting to give somebody a table, quickly raised an eyebrow at me. It was because I'm not wearing anything, isn't it? ... Oh great, now I'm blushing, thinking about it. Damn it, brain!

The stallion who accompanied me then entered, and the waiter's eyebrow went down. Wait, what's that supposed to mean?

"Table for two, please." The stallion, who's name I probably should have asked for by now, told the waiter, and without so much as a second of hesitation, he turned and started into the dining area.

The stallion started after him first, me in tow just behind him. Observing the dining room, I noticed it wasn't very busy, but there were enough ponies dining to not make the place seem vacant. I was a little uncomfortable with the red-colored interior, plus the combo of dim lighting, but I wasn't necessarily too concerned. If it came down to it, I could make like hell and get the buck out of here. Most unicorns weren't incredibly powerful, or so I hoped, and if that was indeed true, then I wasn't in for too much. It's not like... I was getting myself into... something like... Twilight's Dollhouse. That would be fucking scary as hell.

Not long after my being freaked out sightly, the two of them stopped at a table. The stallion sat on one side, and the waiter motioned for me to sit down on the opposite side. With a gulp, I let myself take a seat across from... whatever his name was.

"I'll be back with your menus." The waiter said, before walking off.

The stallion and I both nodded, and then we locked gazes with one another. So do not like where this is going...

"So, what is your name?" He asked.

"D-Daisy Heart." I really don't like where this is going...

"Ah, what a lovely name, for a mare as beautiful as yourself..." He cooed. Oh shit, he's totally trying to butter me up...

I blushed furiously. I hadn't had somepony say that to me be-

I mentally slapped myself. Get a hold of yourself! You know what he's doing, so make it stop! So much easier said than done.

"Uh, that's a, er, really... nice thing to, um, say, but, er..." Come on! Spit it out! The hell is so difficult about it?!

I had been staring into his lavender eyes for quite some time. The look in them... it's hard to describe. What I can say is that his eyes told me that he wanted me... and that quickly raised all kinds of red flags. That and his appearance... his lavender coat which had gotten darker due to the lighting... his scarlet red mane (and tail)... and I couldn't forget the waiter's initial response to me, and then his reaction to this guy entering... something didn't add up.

I needed to get out of here. And fast.

"So, uh, what's your name?" I needed time. Having him focused on talking about himself should give me some time to make an escape plan. My gut told me this was more than just being generous to a stranger. For all I knew, he was secretly a serial killer... and was good at it.

"Prince Facade..." Facade. I didn't even hear the rest of what he said.

That sold it. I had to get out of here. Damn, can't even have a meal around here without falling into the sights of a freaking serial killer. The universe hates me.

When he finished talking, his focus almost instantly reverted back to me. I could seriously feel the weight of said focus locking onto me. I had begun to sweat. I didn't want to die. Not like this.

About then was when the waiter arrived with the menus he promised... and two glasses of water. He set the menus down in front of us, and the glasses of water as well.

"Take your time. I'll be back." He said, turning and walking off. Leaving me with Facade.

He looked me over, watching my every action. My breathing. My increasing nervousness. The sweat that had begun to get past my fur coat and reveal themselves. I could feel him scanning me. I was in deep shit.

With his magic, he levitated his glass to his lips and took several long, loud sips. And in doing so, he revealed to me, without so much as a word, the dryness in my throat that had been developing all day. I hadn't a drink since yesterday. And of course, sitting before me, was a glass of water. And I didn't need to see it to know it was drugged.

He stopped drinking and set the glass, letting out a refreshed moan as he locked gazes with me again, causing me to swallow. Silently, I knew he urged me to drink. Silently, he commanded me to drink. And you wouldn't believe how much I really wanted to.

"Aren't you going to drink?" He asked, licking his lips, making me want to to drink even more than I previously had. "You look absolutely thirsty. And you're sweating. A glass of water will satisfy you."

Out of the corner of my vision, I noticed the waiter return, except stop a few feet from me. Blocking my exit. Facade simply sat there, an innocent smile on his face as he levitated his glass again and took another sip. They were waiting. Waiting for me to make a move. Waiting for me to cave in to thirst and guzzle that drugged water in front of me like there was no tomorrow. Waiting for me to play straight into their hooves.

Waiting... to kill me.

Author's Note

I don't think even I saw the second portion coming... well, whatever. Guess that one from recess in my mind finally got to see the light.

I have no excuse for taking so long to get another chapter out, this time. Nothing beyond laziness and trying to get as much video gaming in as possible before school slaps me in the face after the coming weekend.

Rewards and Ruins

From the look he was giving me, he had all day. With my mind made up, I did the next best thing.

I grabbed the glass of water in my mouth, and proceeded to fling it, and its drugged contents, directly at him. He almost hadn't seen it coming, leaping out of the chair just in time to escape the projectile. In that time, I had already left my seat, to run straight into the "waiter."

The waiter used all the strength he could muster to stop me from getting past him. Unfortunately, I was an Earth Pony. I raised my forward left hoof and struck him upside the head, and he fell like a sack of potatoes.

I hadn't a moment to take a step forward before I found myself surrounded in a lavender colored aura. I barely even needed to turn around to know who was stopping me with magic.

"Aw come on! That's not fair!" I whined to Facade, who's only response was a malicious smile.

"Somepony, anypony, HELP ME!!!" I shrieked, flailing my legs about. Some of the other ponies in this place had to help. There were enough of them in here to-

I gasped. The other "diners" had hardly even noticed what was going on. Reason: they weren't real. Suddenly, they flickered twice, before they vanished completely. The tables they had been sitting at followed. And after that, the room lost its red color, and it became a greyish, cobwebbed room that looked like it hadn't seen activity in a while. This was never a restaurant...

"End of the line, Dirt Pony!" He snarled.

All hope seemed lost. This jerk had me in his magical grip, and my legs were too far out of reach of him. He stared at me with that same evil look in his eye, the same look that told me he figured he had won.

There's always something you can do. A phrase I had heard from my brother's show, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. It repeated itself several times in my head, before finally I had an idea. Who knew a TV show would actually help me one day?

Facade had hardly blinked since he captured me in his aura. And I doubted he wouldn't be blinking for a little while. I had to hold back a grin as I schemed.

"You know, a drink sounds really nice about now." Which it did. But I wasn't planning on actually drinking anything he got me.

At this, he actually looked a little surprised, but he shrugged it off and levitated what remained of the drugged water over to me, and I had gotten the sip-sized amount of it left before he set it right back down, after which he looked at me again with that look in his eye. What he definitely wasn't prepared for was what I did next.

I spat out the sip of drugged water I had received, and the various droplets of it flew out towards him and, before he had a chance to realize what I had just done, it all landed in his right eye.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!" He shrieked, losing focus and forgetting to maintain his hold on me.

I landed on the floor with a loud clop, and I didn't hesitate to run straight for the entrance. Even after I had gotten out the door, he was busy trying to get the water out of his eyes. It must have stung like hell. And I didn't care. I could only wonder how many innocent mares he might have already killed.

Well, it ended today.

I kept running, gaining looks from the random ponies on the street, and I thought I'd never find one. Or at least, that's what I thought before I ran, face first, into a Canterlot guard.

"Oomph!" We both said at the same time, me louder than he.

"You alright, miss?" He asked after recovering.

"No, not alright! Murderer! A few buildings that way! Almost killed me!" I said as frantically as possible. And it wasn't hard to do.

It was like all I had to do was point and say "Murderer". The guy didn't so much as blink before he bolted down the street, headed straight for where I had just been nearly murdered. I was content to sit there and catch my breath, as well as calm myself down. If this was just my first hour into being a city, I swear I'd never set foot - I mean hoof - in one ever again.

Moments later, a look down the street I had come from revealed my would-be-murderer and his accomplice being dragged out of the building by not one but three guards. Oh, perhaps I should mention that the building no longer looked like a restaurant? Instead, it appeared to be quite like a normal house... granted that it looked a little worn down, and had been the lair of my would-have-been-murderer.

While two of the guards made sure the two criminals wouldn't get away, the third, who looked like your generic white-coated Canterlot guard, approached me.

"You have done the city of Canterlot and her ponies a great service today. I thank you." He said.

"It was either me or him." I told him.

"A while ago, a quite attractive reward was offered to anypony who could help lead to his arrest. I'll take you to the Princess once she's returned from Pon-"

"She's already back." I interrupted.

"When was this?"

"Oh, not too long ago. Last I saw she was at the hospital making sure the Elements were alri-"

"How do you know this?"

"She teleported them, and me, back here after she arrived at... Ponyville..." I swallowed, recalling the memory. I just couldn't get past that terrible... would I ever get over it?

"Oh, I'm terribly sorry to hear you were from... ahem, regardless, we're lucky you put an end to that murderer. Ten thousand bits sure sounds like a fine reward, doesn't it?" He added (the last part there) with a smile.

"Ten thousand?" My jaw almost dropped. A bit is a freaking solid gold coin. A freaking gold coin. A gold coin. Gold. Gold equals mon- wait! Same thing here! But still, ten thousand pieces of gold, even as coins, is still a ton of money... wait, if the reward's that big... then...

"What did he- no wait, I know the answer to that one- how many..." I didn't dare finish the rest of that question. That and I simply couldn't. No joke, I just physically could not get myself to finish that sentence.

"Three mares. All Earth Ponies that were visiting." He said, knowing my question.

I could easily say, right then, that more than anything I wished I had my hands for just a brief for moments... just enough time to strangle Facade to death. Maybe not even. I could just smash his skull open with my hooves. That would actually be more satisfyi-

The mental images that formed almost made me recoil. As much as I wanted to do that, something within me did not. I mean, what would smashed brains even look like? I know there'd be a ton of blood, but-

And then, once again, Celestia magically teleported into existence, this time almost literally right next to me.

"Gyah!" I jumped back, utterly surprised.

The guard, instead, saluted, and it seemed as though Celestia hadn't even noticed my presence at first.

"What seems to be the problem?" She asked him.

"Your majesty... we have arrested the serial killer." He said proudly.

"You have? Who is the one who arrested them?"

"If anypony deserves any praise right now, Princess, it's that fine mare standing behind you right now." The guard answered, pointing at me with a hoof.

Celestia turned around to face me, and almost immediately after seeing me, she had a "oh I remember you" moment.

"Wait a second, you're that pony who I accidentally teleported here from... Ponyville, aren't you?" She asked.

"Uh, yes..."

"Now, a question I should have asked you earlier... what is your name?"

"Daisy Heart." John. I'd have to tell somepony eventually. My appearance here was undoubtably because of some form of magic, and who better to have help with that than Celestia? ... Don't answer that. But anyways, for now, I would just have to deal with being Daisy Heart... as much as that irked me. A dragon is a big enough a problem for them, and I knew that it wouldn't help any if I added my problem to the mix.

"Daisy Heart... tell me, what happened?" Celestia asked.

So I took a few minutes to tell her about how I went looking for lunch and - you know what, you already know what happened, why should I summarize what happened? So I just told her what happened, and she listened the entire way through. It was almost... nice. I can't say people listened to me very much back home... or at least, not without butting in with their own point or story to tell. If I hadn't been telling her how I almost had been murdered, then yes, it would have been nice.

"I am glad that, despite all that has happened to you, you have made it out okay. I will give you the ten thousand bit reward, as well as an extra four thousand as condolence for... earlier." I wish people gave me that much money back home...

"But I have some... things to do before any money gets hoofed out. But, before I depart, is there anything I could arrange for you?" I had to fight back a greedy grin. This was gonna take a while.

"Is that all?" Celestia asked.

Me, I hadn't answered her for at least a minute, being too busy rolling around in the ultra-soft bed in a certain fancy room in Canterlot. I hadn't just bought a house with the Princess's money, no, but I did rent it... for now. Good God, these Canterlot ponies knew how to live... the commoners back home just couldn't afford even the bed I now laid upon.

"Yeah. Yeah, I think so." I finally replied.

At this, she excused herself, and got as far as opening the room door before she addressed me once more. "Looks like you have company, Daisy Heart."

"Huh?" Was my response, and I rolled onto my stomach to see what she was talking about.

Surely enough, in the hallway was a long line of ponies... Canterlot ones, specifically. There was only one reason they'd be here; to thank me. They let Celestia walk out, and then they crowded into the room, each about as anxious to get a one-on-one with me as the one next to them.

I gulped.

So the next several hours proceeded like this. Ponies would come and thank me for ending their reason to fear walking the Canterlot streets. I refrained from reminding them that a dragon was on a loose and seemed to be on a rampage. I guess they thought they were safe on their mountain.

Every so often, a pony would come to not only thank me, but give me some minor personal possession as thanks... usually, those were the family members of Facade's victims. They generally lingered around longer, to show me pictures of their lost loved one and share stories about them. I made sure that I was alone with those families to prevent interruption. I didn't want to upset them.

By the time the majority of those wanting to thank me were gone, the sun was already going down, and now I was waiting in my room for room service. I made sure to specify to them that I didn't want the guy or gal delivering to look like a freaking butler. I was still a little on edge following Facade's attempted murder of me, I reasoned. They agreed.

Finally, there was a knock at the door.

"Mrs. Heart?" Came a female voice from the other side.

"Come on in." I called from the irresistibly comfy bed.

The door was enshrouded in a yellowish aura, and opened, revealing the pony who was delivering my meal. Like I requested, she looked just like a normal pony, save for the Canterlot hair-do and that she had a box of what must be my food levitating near her, enveloped in her aura. The mare herself had a lemon yellow coat and a candy red mane and tail, and her Cutie Mark was concealed since she faced me. "Room service!" She chimed, trotting over and setting the box on a nearby table.

"Thanks." I flashed a slight smile, then my gaze turned to my food.

"Is there anything else I can get you?" She asked in her British accent. Maybe they called it a "Canterlot" accent? Then again, did it really matter?

"No... unless my meal didn't come with drinks?"

"It did, ma'am."

"Then I require nothing more. For now."

She then told me to have a good day, and then turned around and left the room, shutting the door on her way out. Finally, now I could dig in without risk of being judged! I gripped the cover with my teeth and placed it aside, looking down at what was about to be my meal.

Let's just say that I love fancy food now.

I awoke the next morning with an irritated growl. I had made sure to not go to bed at around after midnight like I normally did, but even with those several hours of sleep I generally spent playing videogames at night, I still woke up feeling like shit. Didn't help my mood waking up as Daisy Heart again.

There were four problems I had with being her. Number one, Daisy Heart's a girl. Two, she's married. Three, no fingers. And finally, I had neither a horn or wings. I know that I established that fact a long time ago, but I always wanted to be able to be free from the ground, flying without aid of a gigantic metal object, or be able to use magic. The things I'd do with levitation...

With a sigh, I pushed my forelegs so that they were in a standing position while my rear remained seated (I made a few bodily turns during that sentence there; I hadn't fallen asleep on my stomach). I looked to my left side and followed the form of my body with my eyes, stopping at the Cutie Mark. Other than the mane, tail, and eyes, the Cutie Mark had to be the brightest item on... Daisy Heart's body. My journey down myself ended at my tail. Thankfully, my current body shaped blocked me from venturing any further. Some guys might just look in the mirror at that... forbidden area anyways, but not me. I didn't want in on any of that. I mean, that's not even really mine, per se. Wouldn't that... kind of be violating...

I managed to give my tail an irritated flick, a muscle that I had yet to fully master. I still found it hard to believe anything that had happened recently was real. Waltzing into Equestria was already unbelievable, entering it as an already existing pony made it even worse, and then throw in a Skyrim dragon? Did the universes suddenly decide to go 'fuck logic'? Probably.

I left the bed, taking a moment to stretch before walking over to a window. My room offered a fairly decent view of Canterlot... and by that I meant a good number of the neighboring buildings. The castle itself was harder to see. A breath of morning air later, and I was getting my day planned.

When Celestia had been leading me inside, I could have sworn I saw a pool. Floating carelessly in said pool sounded like something I needed... a massage sounded nice, too. Well, maybe if it were done with hands... but who knows? Maybe ponies were good at massaging with their hooves?

I turned and headed over to the closed room door, stopping just in front of it as my brain derped again. How do you open doors again? There isn't a freaking door knob or han...dle. Oh. I gave myself a facepa... a facehoof... only to regret it instantly after my face erupted in pain.

"Fuck!" I hissed, remembering that facepalming like I used to was a very bad idea.

After shaking the pain off, I pushed the door with a hoof, and was somewhat satisfied that it opened like I wanted it to. I'm fairly certain that had I been a unicorn and somehow learned to use magic, I'd not even need to expend energy moving a leg to push at all. I'd be the laziest being in Equestria, no doubt. Or... I'd be the next... what was it, Starswirl the Bearded? Yeah, sounds about right... yeah, that's it...

I left the room and nudged the door shut behind me. I turned down the hallway I had come and set my target: relaxation.

... Actually, breakfast first.

Princess Celestia gazed into the ruins, peering through the dark early morning light. At her sides were multiple of her ponies, a certain Duke Venture and Ruby Aurora to name a couple, and also present was Twilight Sparkle. It made her heart ache, seeing Twilight in as rough a condition as she was now, but she had insisted on coming with and seeing the ruins for herself. Her friends had decided to stay behind and try to comfort one another, as well as heal. Celestia couldn't wait until she got her hooves on the dragon that had murdered and harmed her ponies.

"It's practically an easy walk in," Duke said. "We hadn't any problems entering the first time."

Celestia nodded and started into the ruin, the three other ponies following behind her. Twilight normally would have been all over this place in excitement, but partly because of recent events, she chose not to. Celestia didn't blame her; they were here to see what Duke and his friends might have missed. Anything more they could learn from here was worth it if it involved bringing the dragon to justice.

Hardly a word was exchanged during the initial moments of their journey inside, but that changed when they approached the passcode door that had been opened on Duke's earlier expedition.

"The room of interest is up ahead. Here, we had to translate some early writings and organize it into a saying to open a door." Duke said.

"And what was the saying?" Twilight finally spoke.

"Er... I forgot exactly what it was, but it said something about 'no comfort'." Duke answered.

Celestia nodded, continuing her walk through the ruins. As ancient as she was, she wasn't familiar with this place... particularly, the architecture. It might have belonged to some long-dead civilization before ponies came to Equestria... but that couldn't be right, because the photos had shown carvings depicting a prophecy involving ponies... maybe it belonged to some secret cult that nopony had heard of? She supposed it didn't exactly matter who once owned it, and more so that it contained information regarding the dragon.

It wasn't long after passing the open door that the four entered the carved room (the walls leading to it were carved, but there nothing valuable was found). The Princess's horn ignited, and the entire room became lit.

"Damn, I wish my Illumination was that amazing." Ruby said, earning a smile from Celestia.

"Maybe one day." The Princess told her, before gazing around the room.

"Well this place is so much easier to see when lit this well! Maybe now I'll get the chance to find something I missed!" Duke said excitedly.

Nopony responded to him, instead scanning the room for anything that could have been overlooked last time. They didn't know what they were looking for. But thanks to the lighting, it didn't take long.

"Huh?" Twilight said in surprise, her right forehoof going down further into the ground than she expected.

The others didn't have so much as a chance to ask her what was wrong when a section of the wall nearest to Twilight started to move, grinding upwards and revealing a dark downward staircase filled with cobwebs.

"I always loved secret entrances." Remarked Duke, the first one to bound into the dark passage.

Twilight went on ahead after him while Ruby and Celestia exchanged glances, before joining the other two ponies. Celestia noted that this part of the ruins had degenerated faster than what they had been in previously. The walls were more cracked, the stairs were in disrepair, and she was certain she would have tripped if Twilight hadn't cast a light spell. Celestia could have done that, but Twilight had beaten her to it.

The stairs ended in an underground tunnel, which the four followed until entering a large room. The ceiling was incredibly high, and on the opposite side of the room were gigantic carved doors.

"Spread out, holler if you find anything." The Princess said, walking for the doors.

She largely ignored their replies as she approached the large doors. She eyed the carvings with much curiosity, not knowing what they depicted. It was near impossible to; erosion had gotten the best of this place. Scanning the area around her, she noted that there was no real method of opening the doors. No pressure plates, no buttons, levers... how did whoever built this place plan on getting in-

"Guys! Think I found something!" Ruby announced, and everypony walked over to her.

Ruby stated at some markings on the floor; markings obviously belonging to a bigger picture. Dirt covered everything else. The four made quick work to clear it off, of course, and were quite surprised as to what lay underneath.

"A flaming heart?" Ruby asked nopony in particular.

Duke and the two Princesses eyed the symbol, before things began to click to them.

"I believe it's a Cutie Mark!" Duke exclaimed.

"I swear I've seen it before..." Twilight said, deep in thought.

Celestia took a few moments to piece things together before coming to a surprising revelation. "Daisy Heart!"

"What?" The other three asked simultaneously.

"That's Daisy Heart's Cutie Mark." Celestia explained.

"... oh! I remember now! Yeah, that's Daisy Heart's..." Twilight suddenly recalled.

"I want to say it's something else but... what would it be, then? I mean, it's hard enough to believe the ancients would know of the existence of an individual who wouldn't exist until so much farther in time." Duke said.

"Unless she was supposed to be around closer to their time?" Twilight proposed.

"What would they even want with Mrs. Heart?" Duke asked.

The four speculated for a few minutes before Duke discovered why the Cutie Mark was even there.

"Girls... I think it's a blood seal." Was Duke's claim.

"A... a blood seal?" Twilight asked.

"Yes, a blood seal. I've seen these before. Not very common, but when I find them, it turns out it only accepts a certain blood type, or individual's blood. Assuming what we are concluding so far is true, then Daisy Heart's blood should activate it." Duke explained.

All looked at Celestia, whose gaze was on the blood seal. Going forth with this meant the spilling of blood, so of course the Princess had to have a say on the matter. It would be the blood of one of her own subjects, after all.

"How much?" Celestia's eyes turned to Duke.

"Well... most only require a mere drop..."

All eyes were on Celestia as she stared at the ground, her mind racing as she decided things unknown to the other ponies. And then, in a flash, the sun Princess was gone.