My Little Psyche: Journey of the Soul

I can't tell you where I come from. I've forgotten that a long time ago. But I can tell you where the Boss says I come from. She says that a long, long time ago—before Princess Celestia was even a twinkle in her father's eyes—all ponies were immortal and pure of heart. But such purity was not meant to last.

Now, remember how I just made the distinction between “where I come from” and “where the Boss says I come from?” Well, here's one of the reasons why: At this point, she likes to change the story. Sometimes she says it was an all-powerful and malevolent force from beyond the stars that corrupted ponykind. Other times she says it was ponykind itself that did itself in, becoming prideful in its immortality, leading itself to darkness out of boredom, misplaced curiosity, and self-inflicted insanity.

Regardless of the reason she gives, however, the end result is always the same: The First Alicorns—apparently there were quite a few back in the day—created Death, using so much magic that most of them died in the process. Why “Death” you might ask? Why—to punish the wicked and relieve the innocent, of course. Also, now that these ponies had an expiration date stamped across their foreheads, they quickly had to learn to appreciate life, while they still had it.

This plan wasn't foolproof, however. (Imagine that!) Certain ponies exploited this new concept, using it to find new and creative ways to express their depraved desires. Not to mention the slew of lost souls that starting popping up all over the place, bringing their own special little brand of chaos into the mix.

Even with all of their power, the remaining First Alicorns couldn't even begin to manage it all. And so they appointed us, the Reapers, to do their dirty work for them. Here, again, the story changes: Either we were just ordinary ponies that the First Alicorns trusted to get the job done right and bestowed special powers, like immortality—the very thing that maybe, possibly started this whole mess in the first place. Or, we were created by them from scratch.

Again, doesn't add up. How can you not handle ghosties yourselves, yet make ponies that can? And if you were truly near omnipotent, how can you mess Death up in the first place? Or better yet, not make something better? Or prevent ponykind from frickin' flippin' their shit in the first place! Were you just lazy?

But I digress. Eventually their plan did sorta, kinda work out and now Equestria as we know it is a generally peaceful place to live. Not saying there weren't a few hiccups along the way, but that's a story for another time.

Why am I telling you all of this now, you might be asking? Because the Boss is repeating the same story to me for about the millionth time now—and if I have to suffer though it, so do you.

“Psyche, darlin', are you even listenin' to me?” she asks.

“Every word,” I reply, trying in vain to keep the irritation out of my voice.

“What has gotten into you lately?”

I take a moment to think about this, then say, “Back at the theater you mentioned that I've been acting strange lately. What did you mean?”

She answers with a coy grin. “Well, beyond the whole lettin'-a-ghost-roam-free thing, you've been a lot more careless with keepin' yer true nature a secret—what with roamin' around Ponyville in broad daylight with yer cloak 'n scythe 'n all, not to mention the...sympathy you've been developin' for these...mortals.”

“Right... About all of that... Have you been spying on me?”

The grin drops from the Boss's face. “Psyche, darlin'. It's my job to keep an eye on y'all. You know that. Now tell me, sugah... Do you remember the last time a Reaper failed to follow the rules?”

I took a second to think about it. “...No?”

“Well, that's because they don't exist anymore. If they fail in their duty as Reaper, they pose a threat to not only us, but to Life and Death as we know it. So we erase all record of them from existence. Except for, of course, my own personal recollection of them.” Her expression turned very grave then. “You don't wanna be erased now...do ya, Psyche?”

I imagine what it would be like—being erased. It sounds like a death for Reapers, in a way. I've seen so many souls react so differently when faced with death. Some would beg for their lives with tears in their eyes. While others accepted their fate with a smile on their face. I never really thought of what I would do if I were in their place. I have to admit, I found the prospect quite fascinating to say the least.

The Boss raises an eyebrow at me, as if my internal monologue is plainly written across my face. To be fair, it probably is. “Of course you don't...” she coos, studying my face closely with her big blue eyes as she approaches me. “We are so few as it is. If we lose even one, we're that much closer to bringin' ourselves to extinction. And then what?” She sighs, shaking her head somberly, her honey-colored curls bouncing from side to side as she does so. “We need to stick together, for the greater good. Which is why I'm givin' you a chance to redeem yourself, Psyche dear.”

“'Redeem myself'?” I echo dully.

“Yes... You see, I have reasons to suspect that a certain zebra mare by the name of Zecora has stumbled upon an ancient book of necromancy within the Everfree Forest. I need you to retrieve it for me. As you know, the Everfree Forest does not abide by the natural laws of Life and Death. Your Reaper powers will not work there. As for the zebra, the book may have revealed our existence to her, if she was not aware of us to begin with. As such, you will have to rely on subtlety and aversion to retrieve said book and make it out...relatively unscathed. Do this, and my faith in you shall be restored.”

* * * * *

As I was leaving the Reapers' Domain, I was stopped by one of my fellow Reapers, Prism Limit, a green pegasus stallion that presided over Cloudsdale—as he swooped down out nowhere and landed in front of me.

“Hey, Psyche!” he said, greeting me with a crooked smile. “Heard you did something to piss off the Boss! What'd ya do!?”

“Hello, Prism. Yes, I did indeed upset the Boss. Apparently I have been for awhile now.”

“Aaaaand...?” he asked, waving his hoof for more details.

“And she's sending me on an errand to retrieve something for her. So I either I do as she says, or I get...erased.”

Prism's smile dropped a little as he trotted out of the way to walk beside me. “Erased? But...she can't really do that, can she?”

“She's our Boss, Prism. She can do whatever she wants.”

“Well...it just doesn't seem right, is all.”

Despite complying to the Boss's demands, I couldn't help but agree with him. Smiling softly, I said, “Careful, Prism. Keep talking like that and you'll be next on her list.”

Prism's eye dropped to the floor as he stopped in his tracks. I stopped for a moment as well, eying him curiously. When he refused to acknowledge me, I hesitantly starting making my way out of the Domain again when he called out, “Hey, Psyche!”

I stopped and turned to him once more. His usual happy-go-lucky smile was nowhere to be seen. I had never seen him as serious as he was right then...

“If and when you retrieve whatever it is you're looking for, you should go to the Castle of Two Sisters. Instead of coming right back here, I mean...”

“Hm? Why would I ever do that?”

“Because I asked you to? Trust me. It's important. You remember where the Castle is, right?”

I nodded. “Of course I do.”

“So you will be there?”

I sighed. “Yes, Prism. I'll be there.”

Prism's smile returned to him. “Great! See you there!”

“Indeed...” And with that, I left through a portal at the entrance of the Domain and ended up back in the world of the living, in Ponyville. I turned in the direction of the Everfree Forest, spying the dark trees lining the horizon. I looked up at the skies above those trees and saw clouds moving of their own volition—without pegasi to guide them. ...Free.

But freedom was dangerous, was it not? Rules were put in place for a reason. In a world without rules, I was vulnerable. In a world without rules, my mistakes would go on unchecked until I became lesser and lesser. Until, finally, I became unfit enough to be...erased from existence.

But what if that's not true? a voice inside my head responded. What if that's just what you were lead to believe? The Boss is just a pony after all, is she not? No more or less than you?

And what of other ponies? the voice continued. Like Higgins and Cathode? They are free, are they not? At least, free from the laws that bind you. Do they seem worse off for it?

My thoughts flashed back to the theater. To the light in Cathode's eyes, to the smile on Higgins' face.

“Perhaps...I should look into this matter further,” I said aloud to nobody but myself, making my way towards the Forest. “Maybe I'll come out of this with more than just a book in my hooves. Maybe...I'll never come out at all. Huh. Imagine that.” I said with a grin on my face.

When I reached the threshold of the Forest, I glanced back in the direction of Ponyville one last time, before taking a deep breath, turning back towards the trees, and plunging into the darkness just beyond.

As my eyes adjusted, I immediately spotted something white and fluffy in a nearby bush. Curious, I moved closer to inspect it. The sound of my hooves rustling against the ground caught its attention, for it popped out into the open, revealing itself to be a rabbit.

The two of us stared at each other for a moment before it tilted its head at me, its little nose sniffing the air, as if it was just as curious about me as I was about it.

“Angel...?” a meek voice called out from behind me. “Angel? Where did you run off to, you naughty rabbit?”

I turned my head in the voice's direction and found its source. Now this pony, I definitely recognized...