Rainbow Dachshund

by Vanilla Mocha

Rating: everyone
Tags: Slice of Life, Comedy, Random
Length: 1967

Rainbow Dash wakes up... as a dog.

Rainbow Dash. As a dog. Enjoy.

Please don't take this seriously. I'm a human too, I've gotta have fun.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2015-09-21 23:20:02 UTC

Woof...

The birds were chirping, and the sun was shining- it was indeed another beautiful, magical day in Ponyville. All of the ponies were out and about, having a great time. Though many were just casually running errands and working their everyday jobs, everything was pleasant. From the tiniest Breezies to the biggest Ursas, all was peaceful. It was, in fact, a very magical day... until a pegasus had to mess with a unicorn, doing, well... magic. Spike was there... he'll tell you all about it. Right, kid?

"Huh? Oh, yeah... right author mare."

Great! Now you get the chance to be the narrator. Now I can take today off and go on my much-needed vacation to Canterlot...

"Whoa! That'll be fun! I get to be the narra- what was that?"

What? N-nothing. C'mon, Spike... they're all waiting to hear the story! They clicked this to read that, ya' know!

"Ugh... ok, fine. It all started on a pretty day in our little town, Ponyville...

"Just a bit more..." Twilight Sparkle was busy in her new laboratory, err, bedroom, fixing up a 'sciencey' new spell. She believed that as the Princess of Friendship, and the bearer of the Magic element, she should take more time in doing hobbies such as these. Well, let's just say that idea didn't stick around long. The purple pony was holding up a pipette with only a few drops of a greenish-looking liquid inside of it. She held it in her pink aura right above a glass beaker that contained a red substance. "Careful..." She whispered to herself, watching closely as another single green drop fell into the beaker. With her white lab coat and professional chemistry glasses on, she stepped back to observe. At first, nothing happened. But then, about twenty long, boring, quiet seconds later... it bubbled, and turned yellow. What did Twilight accomplish? Yellowness.

"Ah-ha! Eureka! Now I can finish my potion! I've been waiting for that to work!" Running over to her chalkboard, she circles a A364HU8R7 squared. Smiling, she continues to talk to herself. "I should've known to not cube it the first time! Squaring is easier, anyways... but yes! I did it!"

That's when I walk in. Heh, you forgot I'm Spike, didn't ya? I'm a great narrator! Oh, yeah... right... the story.

"Hey, Twilight. Whatcha up to?" I wave to her, noticing the huge grin on her face.

"I did it! I made the lost potion! And the best part is that it's from an ancient civilization with a dead language! Aren't I genius?!"

"Yep, you're pretty genius."

"Whoo! I was called a genius!" Twilight threw her front hooves up in the air. If you lived with her every day, then you'd come to learn that she gets easily excited over... well, science. But then, her personality kicks in and she acts less like Pinkie and more like... the Twilight we all know her as.

Shrugging, I walk over to the counter (which is really Twilight's bedroom dresser) on which the beaker sat.

"Hey, lookie! What is this? Lemonade?"

"SPIKE!" Twilight flew in between the beaker and I. "DON'T. TOUCH. IT."

"W-why?"

"Because," the mare calmed herself down, "I'm not sure what it does. For all I know, it could be lemonade- or it could disintegrate you faster than you can blink! I don't want to risk anything until I know for a fact exactly what it does, ok?"

"Eh, ok. I'm not really thirsty for lemonade anyways... Celestia, if only gems could be liquefied." I licked my lips before noticing Twilight's annoyed look. "Ok, ok fine! I'm moving, ok?" The princess hates being disturbed while working with magic and science, and especially magical science. So, I walked out.

"Geesh... she doesn't have to be so bossy. I'm not dumb enough to just pick it up and drink it. I mean, come on- who'd do that?" I say to no one in particular. Walking into the throne room, I notice a pony sitting in Rainbow Dash's throne. It was none other than... Rainbow Dash. Heh, who knew?

"Hiya, Dashie- what are you doing in my house?"

"Hi, Spi- I asked you to not call me DASHIE!!!" She yells, but then quickly covers her mouth. Whispering, she says, "I'm waiting for Twilight."

"That's... weird. I mean, in her own castle? I don't know... I mean, this isn't the library. Don't you think that's pretty... strange? Couldn't you get arrested for that?"

Looking around, as if checking to make sure we're alone, she whispers, "I snuck in! Twilight has the last Daring Do book of the series... and I can't let anypony know! Not even Twilight!"

"Then why'd you say you were waiting for her?"

"I lied... now get down! I hear something!" Rainbow swoops out of the throne and ducks behind it.

I fold my arms and look around. "There's nothing here, Rainbow. Twilight's busy upstairs with-" I'm cut off by a low, rumbling noise. I freeze. "W-what was th-that?"

Rainbow sits up straighter. "False alarm, it wa-"

"False alarm!? Didn't you hear that!?"

"Shush! Like I was about to say, Spike... it was only my stomach. Have any food?"

I facepalm. "You sneak into my home, trying to steal a princess's book, and now you're asking me for FOOD?!"

"Yeah, pretty much."

Sighing, I reply, "Well, come on then. We need to go before Twilight sees you. Of course, I could always get the book for you-"

"No! I want to touch it! I need my book!" Rainbow grins evilly, rubbing her front hooves together.

"Then come on... but to the kitchen first. No more stomach grumbles!"

"Alright, little drake."

Rainbow and I walk into the hallway and down to the dining hall, next to the kitchen. But, unfortunately, before we could enter to the kitchen, Twilight walks in. The purple alicorn didn't notice us. For one, she doesn't notice me... reminds me of a lot of bronies. What? Just sayin'. Second, Dash flew up onto the ceiling... and hid herself among the decorations that Rarity had placed. Twilight goes into the kitchen, humming a small tune.

"What are we gonna do now?" Dash asks me quietly.

"Get the book! The room is empty- c'mon!"

Rainbow shrugs, and we rush out of the dining hall and upstairs into the princess's bedroom.

"Wouldn't it be in her library?" Dash asks me, looking around.

"Naw. It's Daring Do we're talking about. She loves it just as much as you!"

"Ok, so... where is it?"

"I'll find it... you stay right here."

As I looked around the bedroom, I didn't notice the cyan pegasus. She was looking at the beaker containing the yellow liquid.

"What is this stuff? Lemonade?"

"Beats me." I hear another stomach rumble, but I ignore it. Then, I find the book Rainbow was searching for. "Here it i- Rainbow, don't!" I yelled, turning around. Rainbow Dash was drinking the substance- no, she drank it! There was no more left.

As if on cue, Twilight enters. "Spike? Rainbow Dash?! What's going on?!"

Before the I, the poor, confused dragon can answer the even more confused princess, a bright light explodes, blinding everyone.

"Wha... what happened?" Rainbow Dash asks wearily as she looks up from the ground and at Twilight and I. We're looking back down at her, with a mixture of confused and grinning facial expressions. Then, Twilight bursts out, laughing.

"Hey... why are you smiling? And laughing? What's going on?" Rainbow asks. She's laying on her back, facing us. Twilight, to her right, is laughing hysterically as if she'd never seen anything as funny before. And Me? My jaw dropped, and I stared blankly at the pegasus... or, what used to be a pegasus.

"Spike? Twilight? What's going on?" Rainbow repeated. Noticing how she wasn't going to get an answer, she rolled onto her stomach to try and stand up... but that's when she realized that she was only four inches off the ground.

"You... SHRUNK ME?!" Rainbow yelled. Twilight calmed her laughing, and said, "No, not exactly... see, you're not a pony anymore, Rainbow."

"What?!"

"Yeah... you see, you're still you... but in a dog's body. A dachshund, to be exact."

"What's a 'dachshund'?" Rainbow lifted up one of her paws and studied it.

"I saw one when I went into the human world... they're long but have short dogs, like you are now."

I then came out of my trance and pointed at Rainbow. "Heh, you're 'Rainbow Dachshund'!" Laughing, I fell to the floor, rolling from side to side.

Dash rolled her eyes, unamused at my pun. Turning her attention back to Twilight, she asked, "Can't you... like, turn me back?"

"...I'm not sure. I don't even know why the potion did that. I was trying to bring our two dimensions together... But why would you be a dog? I was a human- your counterpart was a human!"

"What's a 'human'?" Rainbow asked.

Sighing, Twilight shook her head. "Nevermind..."

"Well, what do I do? I can't fly!" Rainbow sat down, angered.

"I'm just as confused and irritated as you. But complaining will get us nowhere." Twilight then turned back to her books, and flipped through the pages.

Before Rainbow could say anything else, the a journal started buzzing and blinking. "T-Twilight?" I asked.

"What, Spike?"

"T-that book!"

Twilight Sparkle turned her attention to the glowing journal. "Ah-ha! Sunset Shimmer wrote me!" Gasping, she exclaimed, "Rainbow! I know how to help you!"

"Oh no..." I murmured. Twilight, having a sudden idea... Could not always be a good thing.

"Really?! What?" Rainbow and I obviously we're not on the same page.

"I'm sending you through the portal!"

"What?!" Rainbow and I exclaimed at the same time.

"Wait wait wait- you're sending me to another dimension?!"

"Well... Yes. I know it sounds weird, but I think I can help you if-"

"This is totally AWESOME!" Rainbow interjected.

"Ahem..." Twilight mumbled, looking annoyed. After Dash quieted down, she continued. "If it works like a counter spell, I will take the magic in the portal, duplicate it, and use it on you once you're sent back to make you back to normal. I'm writing Sunset to let her know you're coming, and she'll tell me through the book if you're a pony or what, ok?"

Rainbow only stared at Twilight before slowly nodding her head.

"Now listen... No running around, getting lost. This is dangerous. You can't just go through another dimension in a short amount of time without anypony else knowing." Twilight turned back to her books, looking away from Dash. Terrible mistake.

Rainbow walked up to the mirror. I couldn't help but snicker at her strange new body. "Oh, shut up Spike!" Dash murmured.

..."and you have to stay with Sunset. If you don't see her, just wait by the portal. Bark at anypo-anyone that you don't know. You'll recognize Sunset- she wears a black jacket, and has red and yellow hair. She..." No one by now was listening to Twilight. That 'no one' was none other than Rainbow Dash.

"Twilight?" I said nervously.

"...and she is sometimes- what, Spike?"

"R-Rainbow Dash! Stop!" Before I could finish telling Twilight, I had to do my best to keep Dash from going through the portal.

"I'm getting my wings back!" She yelled before the mirror sucked her in.

"No! D-Dash!!?" Twilight ran up to the mirror as Rainbow disappeared. "...I-I can't believe it..."

"Yeah, me neither! She totally fell for it!"

"I knew she hates lectures on what to do, but wow! She really got bored and went after her wings."

"How do you think she'll react when she ends up as a dragon over there?"

"I think Sunset will thank me for having something for that 'Show and Tell' she was talking about!"