Chapters Lyra found herself galloping next to the gurney as it was pushed down the hospital corridors. The wheels rattled and the monitor beeped in time with Vinyl’s heart. The mare herself was pulsating with every beat. She let out a moan of pain but continued bobbing her head through it all.
As they burst through a pair of doors one of the doctors running next to Vinyl grabbed a nearby nurse.
“This patient is suffering from severe Wubatosis. I need a treble infusion STAT! And you!” he said, turning to Lyra “How could she have gotten this bad? I’ve never seen such an acute case.”
Lyra stared down at Vinyl’s hoof where it twitched, still trying to spin the shattered piece of record it gripped. “We were having a battle in the park, my electric harp versus her turntables. Neither of us could fumble the other's mumble so she turned it up to eleven. I was thrown off stage when the speakers exploded but she was right in the middle of it!”
“Then I’m amazed she’s still alive,” the doctor said as he guided Vinyl into a room and onto a bed, “the level of Wubs she endured - most ponies are rendered unresponsive around level eight.”
“Do the Wubs liquefy their brains?!?”
“Don’t be ridiculous, the constant head banging makes them dizzy and they pass out before the Wubs can do any real damage. But your friend here literally has beats coursing through her veins. The fact she hasn’t vibrated apart at the microscopic level is astounding.”
Seeing the stricken look on Lyra’s face the doctor quickly continued. “But she’ll be fine. As soon as she receives three standard Treble transfusions she’ll treat us to a few minutes of vocal dubstep before falling asleep. That or…” at this point the doctor dropped into a softer tone, almost mumbling to himself. “well, she might explode. I’ve never seen anypony quite so wubbed up.”
A panic stricken nurse burst into the room and presented the doctor with a destroyed I.V. bag. “Doctor, there’s nothing left! An undulating wave on the ultra Bassatronic spectrum must have blown through and ruptured all our reserves. Everything’s contaminated.”
“She’s in Celestia’s hooves then.” Said the stallion, turning back to where Vinyl fitfully beatboxed in her sleep. “I’ll send a message to Canterlot General but with her rate of deterioration the chances they’ll arrive in time are slim. Only a miracle, or perhaps the power of love, can save her now.”
Lyra moved to the bed and took Vinyl’s hoof. Despite the vibrations coming off the mare threatening to rattle the teeth out of her skull she refused to let go. “Why’d you have to do it? Those things only go up to ten for a reason .” She put the hoof to her forehead and only looked up when the doctor leaned comfortingly against her. They stared in silence, waiting for a miracle.
Or in this case, for Octavia to kick the door off its hinges.
Two pairs of eyes snapped to the doorway and looked on in horror as Octavia lifted a violin and threw it at Vinyl. Before Vinyl could be hit in the face with the instrument a blue arc of electricity suspended it in the air. Vinyl’s eyes snapped open, completely blue and pulsating, while more and more electricity poured off her and into the violin.
Amid Octavia’s scream of “Hit the deck!” and a sound like a bass cannon, the violin exploded.
As the dust settled Octavia helped the other two ponies to their feet. Lyra glanced at the bed and then rushed over, babbling and sobbing in relief at the sight of Vinyl blinking blearily at them.
“Vinyl’s supposed to carry one of those on her at all times.” Octavia explained to the doctor while adjusting her bowtie, “The classical nature of the instrument seems to draw the Wubatonic particles out of her bloodstream, you see. But she left it at the apartment this morning and I only just noticed it.”
“Well,” mused the doctor, “normally I wouldn’t condone throwing musical instruments at ponies as a viable medical practice, but I think I’ll let this one slide.” With that he left to attend to his other patients.
“Now Vinyl,” Octavia said, turning once more to the mare in question, “what have we learned today?”
“Umm, use larger cables so the speakers don’t overload?”
“And…?”
“Well...” Vinyl thought. Then, donning her characteristic sunglasses, “nope, just cables. Everything else was pretty cool.”
Author's Note
Written for The Writeoff Association's May 2015 event I Regret Nothing
It was a warm summer afternoon in Ponyville. Soft, fluffy clouds lazily meandered overhead and the distinctive giggles of a certain pink pony could be heard wafting up from the lake shore where she was undoubtedly cavorting with a number of small foals. It was the perfect opportunity to rest and relax or generally enjoy the company of friends.
And so it was most unusual on this day to find a pony off by themselves lying on a grassy knoll just above the lake, staring up at a sky that contrasted quite harshly with their mood. More unusual still was to find that the pony in question was a rather distinctive blue pegasus.
Rainbow Dash was neither lazing nor napping on this day, though to some it might appear otherwise. There were no storms to be prepared, no skies to be cleared. No hydras threatened and no evil king that time had forgotten was poised to throw the world into chaos. At the moment she was in between adventures and though the sun wrapped her tightly in its warm embrace she found herself unable to succumb to its affections. So her eyes remained locked on the clouds as they danced to a tune few others could hear.
The only warning that her relative seclusion was ending were a few soft hoofsteps in the grass before a large brown hat swallowed her view. “Hey there sugarcube. Why the long face?”
Rainbow pushed the stetson out of her eyes with one hoof to glance over at where Applejack had thrown herself on the ground beside her. The usual band that contained her mane had been removed to let the sopping mess sprawl across the grass. She lay with eyes closed, legs extended to all sides, letting the sun slowly pull the moisture from her body.
With a sigh she dropped the hat back over her eyes. “I’ve been thinking AJ...”
“Must hurt somethin’ awful.” Applejack broke in with a snort.
“Ugh - I’m being serious here!” The hat hit Applejack in the nose but did nothing to diminish her grin. “We’ve been fighting monsters and stuff for years now and, ya know, it’s never been easy but we knew what we were supposed to do.
“But this Council of Friendship stuff. I mean, what are we supposed to do - tell everypony to get along? We have this huge castle from the Tree of Harmony, which is awesome and all, but are we supposed to treat every little fight among ponies as a ‘Crisis of Friendship’?”
Applejack plopped her stetson over her eyes before replying. “I dunno Dash. To be honest I don’t rightly feel up to the task. Look at me. Five years ago I was just running a farm. Now we’re working hoof-in-hoof with a princess to help everypony. We can’t know where this is gonna take us. Just gotta put one hoof in front of the other and roll with the bucks.”
“That’s the other thing. We almost didn’t make it against Tirek. Who’s to say next time won’t be too much for us? What if there’s more of them or we’re not strong enough or I’m too slow or...” Sitting up with a sigh her eyes fell to rest on the grass before continuing. “I just… I don’t want to lose any of you.”
A slow chuckle escaped AJ’s lips and her emerald eye sparkled where it peaked out from under the rim of her hat. “Shucks sugarcube. I didn’t know ya cared.”
Dash shot her a dirty look but she continued. “In all seriousness Rainbow, I’ve thought about it myself. Ain’t none of us wanna kick it but we’re fighting the good fight - an it needs fighting.”
“But what if- ”
“Ain’t no two ways about it Rainbow. You can’t run forward if yer too anxious to take a step. I know yer worried, but if I was gonna go I’d want y’all to have as much to remember me by as you could. Now giddy up, sugarcube. The others are waiting.” Standing up, Applejack took a few steps before turning to look expectantly at Dash.
A small smile played at the lips of the of the blue pony as she looked toward the lake where her friends had stopped to look up at the pair.
“Okay, AJ. Hey, race you to the water? Threetwoone go!”
Author's Note
Written for The Writeoff Association's March 2015 event The Best Medicine
It was impossible.
After how far they’d come, after how long they’d planned and plotted and sacrificed, they had failed. All the sleepless nights, all the harebrained schemes, every time they had survived by the skin of their teeth meant nothing now.
The Night would last forever.
A chuckle rolled sweetly over his ears and would have caused him to smile but for the mare that followed it through the crumbling stone portal - A latest and most violent addition to the room’s architecture.
“Nightmare -ung- Moon” He wheezed, each breath causing pain to lance through his chest. His left arm was broken, if the way it was twisted on the floor was any indication, along with several of his ribs. Given the force of the blow he was surprised his head had survived contact with the stone masonry.
“Indeed. And it is a pleasure to finally have to opportunity to formally make your acquaintance as well, Sunchaser. Yes I know you. I have been paying very special attention to your little group ever since your escape from the Isle of Shadows. Very impressive, especially for an Earth Pony such as yourself.”
Shock was plastered across Sunchaser face and his eyes darted around the room. After a moment of searching his gaze stilled and settled on the Nightmare. “You knew. Why?”
The Nightmare gave an indulgent smile and crouched down to better look Sunchaser in the eyes. “Why, for entertainment of course. Ruling with an iron hoof can become so dreadfully dull at times. I appreciate it when my precious little subjects take the time to amuse their queen.”
“Well then. I’ll be glad. To brighten up your day.” As the words left his lips a lance of golden fire slammed into the Nightmare and pinned her against the wall beneath a curtain of flame. Stones and mortar hissed and bubbled around the edges of the inferno, melting and beginning to run down the wall into puddles. “River Run.” Sunchaser said with a wide, painful, grin. “Had her by the ropes. Was no need to. To butt in.”
A turquoise unicorn slowly advanced to stand beside Sunchaser. A glowing, cloth wrapped tube attached to his saddle was emitting the unending torrent of flame over what remained of the hallway. “Now I couldn’t go and let you take all the glory. What would all the pretty mares do if they never learned about the dashing, young, eligible stallion who defeated the Lunar Tyrant?”
“Rejoice?”
“Perish the thought. But in all seriousness, we should all get out of here before the guards-”
Both ponies froze as an ominously familiar chuckle echoed down the hall and froze them in place. Darkness twisted around the flames all the way up to the glowing tube before scattering, tube and all, into an inky dark haze. “Leaving so soon? But we’ve hardly begun to know each other.”
“It can’t be” Sunchaser stuttered. “You… the sunfire-”
“Is a relic of a bygone age. Did you truly think such a tiny shard of light could hope to harm the Queen of the Night? In the heart of her domain?” The Nightmare was almost purring now, trotting delicately forward as her darkness began to snake around the two ponies. “I would ask how it was you managed to acquire such a potent weapon of light, but I am loath to spoil the next surprise.”
Blackness started to cloud Sunchaser’s vision. He could see his limbs changing to ebony marble as the Nightmare finished her work. “Alas though, time grows short and there are duties that must be attended to. Now you must sleep child, a place awaits you place in my Halls of the Fallen. It is not every day that ponies make such a delightfully interesting play.”
Author's Note
So I didn’t like this one. I didn’t get much from the prompt, didn’t work on it for long, and didn’t like what I put out. Didn’t even get close to the word limit. (I get it’s a ‘limit’ but still. It’s the principal of the thing.)
As such I almost didn’t finish this, only got it out because I told myself if I didn’t I was a whiny little quitter face. And I still didn’t like it. (Must have spent half an hour watching a one minute clip of NM Moon trying to get the voice down and I still hated it. Too OOC.) So I put it out and waited for everyone to take a dump on it. I wanted them to dump on it and justify my feelings.
Lo and behold this esteemed group of writers, who I am proud to call myself one of, failed to live up to my pessimistic standards. I was both giddy and annoyed at the lack of negative feedback and generally positive (if middling) reviews.
Hats off to you. You make it hard to be disappointed in myself.
The sun sinks over The Lonely Peak as our heroes journey to find the revered Sage of Blackrock Mountain. Among their number is Brush Hawk the Hippogryph Rogue from the Glenwood Forests, Hornstalk the Minotaur Paladin of Bullgaria, and Starcaller the Unicorn Mage of Arcanholt. Together they trod up the path towards a pair of lonely doors set into the mouth of a cave. Dusty and tired from the day's journeys Starcaller knocked upon the wood with her staff.
“Do you think he’s still here?” Hornstalk asked. “Every other house looked like it had a stampede run through it, and the sages were nowhere to be found.”
“He better be,” Hawk replied, “we’ve been looking for these sages for days. I don’t wanna have to tramp through another ‘dark forest of doom’ with you guys. No offence but eventually even killing Mirkwood Crawlers gets old.”
Starcaller knocked on the doors again before anxiously turning to the other two. “It’s our best bet. It’s far away from town so maybe The Dark Drake hasn’t gotten here yet.”
They waited for a few moments before Hawk spoke up. “Maybe we should just-”
At that moment the doors swung inwards to reveal an adolescent dragon in a brown smock and glasses. “Thank Celestia you’re alright sage,” Starcaller said, bringing her hoof to to her chest in relief, “we were worried that-”
“I’m not the sage,” the dragon interjected, “I’m his scribe, Nail. Sage Cotton Ears is on vacation.”
“Well where is he?” Brush Hawk demanded, “Drakeovitch is probably after his life already and if we have to go save him I’m not going to be a happy bird."
Nail dismissed the notion with a wave of his claw. “I wouldn’t worry about Cotton. Drakeovitch hosts an event every now and then that all the sages are invited to. They go on a cruise, get massages, and talk philosophy. Bleh!”
“Pinkie...”
“What’s up Twilight?” Pinkie asked innocently, glancing up from the map and dice scattered before her.
“Why is he on vacation?” the unicorn asked, “And why would Drakeovitch be sending him on a cruise? That doesn’t make any sense.”
“Silly Twilight.” she replied, “YOU said to make to make the game challenging, so I had Drakeovitch read the Evil Overmare’s List. Any good Evil Overmare knows that when a band of heroes show up you should send all the sages and elderly mentores on vacation so they can’t help the heroes. It’s rookie stuff Twilight.”
“But Pinkie,” Rainbow said, a hoof pressed to her forehead in frustration, “if all the sages are off playing in the water, how are we supposed to get to the evil guy before he does his super ritual thing?”
“I have to agree with Dash on this one sugarcube.” Applejack nodded to the pegasus, “As much as I like searching abandoned buildings and wrastling critters, I’d like to move this here story along. Ain't there some way you could cut us a smidgen of slack?”
Pinkie let out a dramatic sigh and rolled her eyes. “I guess you could try asking Nail if he knows anything about secret rituals or passages into evil castles or anything. But-” she said, and leaned towards Applejack to whisper in a not so subtle manner, “you didn’t hear it from me!”
“Alrighty then,” Applejack said, “I ask the scribe if he knows anything about rituals or how to stop the Dark Drake Drakeovitch.”
“Roll it!” Pinkie said and the two each picked up a die and tossed it back to the table. Pinkie glanced at the results before looking down at her books.
“So Nail turns to you and says that, actually, he’s not supposed to be taking to you cause Drakey is paying him not to help traveling bands of adventurers-”
Twilight levels a flat stare. “Pinkie.”
“-and he’s really sorry but Drakey has him under contract and breaking contract is really unhealthy.”
“Oh come on!” Rainbow says, “How are we supposed to get anything done if this guy’s one step ahead of us all the time?”
“Sorry Dashie, but story dictates character. It’s not my fault Drakey learned so much, I just gave him the list!”
Author's Note
It occurred to me that I have a few more of my contest entries backlogged. Guess I should post them?
Space is vast. It’s so vast that most ponies can’t wrap their heads around it. Not when rapid trans-dimensional teleportation drives mean that a system hop only takes a few weeks. You can stand on a viewing platform, with dark voids in every direction, and not understand how truly large real emptiness is. Not from the safety of our ships.
I’ve been on spacewalks before, standard procedure for repair and maintenance on some of the larger vessels. I’ve looked down from the hull of a of a starliner and seen how tiny a planet looks from orbit, how vulnerable it is.
But I still didn’t know. I thought I did, but I didn’t. Not until I watched the thruster lights of the Cosmic Ray vanish into infinity.
The two other ships, visible only as curtains of black against the starscape, each made their ponderous turns to follow the Ray and vanished after it. I grinned smugly. They wouldn’t catch her. Even damaged, she was a fast ship. Modified propulsion engines would barley be good enough to keep her on the scope for a few days.
But that was more time than I had.
Reaching up I tapped the side of my helmet and the HUD flickered to purple life. A female voice immediately started screaming into my ear. “-et you do that Skylander! Even if-- What happened to the ship, Chrome?”
I grinned. “They got away.”
“What?” said the voice. My HUD flickered again and a translucent purple pony stood in front of me, just out of hoof’s reach. “You actually did it? Then why are we out here?”
“Stupid mistake. One of the emitters must’ve been damaged when they hit us. The shield didn’t cover us and we slid right off when they went to warp.”
“Oh.” she said, the pony on my HUD folding her ears back and looking away. “So, they don’t even know we’re back here.”
“Probably not.” I said. I resisted the urge to scratch at my left leg, reminding myself that if I couldn’t feel a micrometeoroid through it I wouldn’t feel a scratch. “Doesn’t really matter through. They don’t have the time to backtrack with kirin on their tail.”
“Are you okay?”
I glanced down at my left leg. “Physically, sure. For now. I don’t think I’ll have to worry about that infection though.”
Her image flickered for a second as numbers flashed across my HUD. “I’ll try tuning the air scrubbers. I think I can get a few more hours out of them. If we’re lucky the Ray can shake the kirin and make their way back.”
I shook my head, “Don’t bother. The drive’s operating at less than fifty percent power. They’ll never get here in time.”
“Then I’ll turn on the beacon. Somepony will see it and-”
“Spark.”
“If we reduce your temperature and oxygen we can try to approximate hypersleep for-”
“That’s not why I brought you back online.”
“There’s still a chance for rescue. You can’t give up!”
“Spark,” I said, “You know the odds. No one’s coming.”
“But,” she said, her image looking side to side before focusing on my face, “if I can’t help with life support, and there’s no one coming, then- then--" She looked at me, eyes pleading for a hint of hop. Then she straightened and, blinking back tears she couldn't shed, asked "H-how can I be of service?”
I stared past her into the void, out at where the ship’s lights had disappeared. My HUD zoomed in on the area. In it I could see the remains of a supernova spreading out into the cosmos thousands of years in the past. “Spark,” I said, reaching out to touch the nothingness around me, “have you ever thought about how small we really are?”
Author's Note
As seen in the 2018 Writeoff It Could Have Gone Better with minor edits.
The sun has a way of cutting through the eyelids. Not that it was a bad thing, especially for the ponies who needed to rise early. The stinging rays that assault the senses make sleep impossible but are almost offset by the warm tingling that spreads from where they touch. Almost.
Waking up was always refreshing for the mare. Her eastern window was nearly blinding but the light was slowly warming the room. Rolling out of bed she landed firmly on the floor before stretching with a soft yawn.
Blinking blearily she stumbled toward the washroom. The hall was pitch black after the blinding daylight sun but the mare had no trouble navigating. Leaning against the wall she moved methodically onward before finding the doorframe with her shoulder and stepping inside. A mirrored medicine cabinet sat above the sink and she moved to look into it before fumbling for her toothbrush for a moment. She flicked her tail and stared expectantly at the mirror. After a second of standing in the dim room she glanced at the unresponsive light above her head before turning to glare at the switch resting defiantly in the off position. Gauging the distance she leaned toward it and flicked her tail again.
The light blinked on and she turned back to the mirror with a satisfied sound. Raising the toothbrush to her lips she paused, then resumed brushing. Spit. Rinse. Replaced the brush. Eye the mirror to be sure.
“Eeyup. Gonna be one of those days.”
The morning was fairly mundane, all things considered, and Big Mac had proceeded to go about her morning chores. Carefully checking out each of the windows for any rampaging monsters or abnormal plant growth she had just stepped out the front door when a cry of ‘What in tarnation?!’ echoed through the house. With a sigh and another “Eeyup” Big Mac plodded toward the barn.
When she returned, a decidedly less than feminine Winona in tow, she found the entire family around the breakfast table looking decidedly uncomfortable. Closing the door behind herself she glanced around the room. Applejack was morosely working through some biscuits and staring at his bigger, bulkier hoof between bites. Applebloom was curled up against ‘Granny’ Smith. He was fiddling with the bow in his mane and mumbling about how he “didn’t want a colt’s cutie mark”. Granny Smith seemed to be taking the changes best. The old stallion sat, Applebloom in one hoof, a biscuit in the other, looking out the window in annoyance.
At the sound of the shutting door AJ looked up and relief flooded as a brief flicker of hope burn out. “Big Mac?” he asked.
“Eeyup.”
“Have any idea what’s going on here?”
“Nnope”
“You doin all right?”
“Eeyup.”
A snicker. “You know you look kinda like Rainbow?”
A pause. “Nnope.”
By this point Applebloom had turned to look slack jawed at his ‘sister’ and Big Mac looked at herself for the first time too. She was altogether smaller then when she had gone to sleep the previous night. Her large whooves and sturdy frame had slimmed down somewhat leaving her in the obvious feminine condition. Her mane was also longer and more silky than it had been, although it was a tangled mess from when she had opted not to brush it that morning. Strong muscle was still visible through her coat but it seemed less bulky than before, almost like Applejack’s used to be.
On the other hoof, Applejack looked like she belonged in the guard. He had bulked up and now stood eye to eye with Big Mac. He sported a large square jaw and heavily defined muscles that tapered down to powerful hooves. His ponytail had shrunk to just past shoulder length but was still tied back with Applejack’s usual band.
Applejack finished off his biscuit and set about clearing away the dishes. “I reckon it’s about time we figured this whole mess out then. Now we don’t know if'n anypony else has been afflicted so I’ll head on over to Twilight’s castle and see if she knows why we all woke up colts and Big Mac’s got a pair of eyes that could melt a rattler's heart.”
Big Mac, for her part, glared at her brother while chewing into a pile of haycakes with deliberate slowness.
Author's Note
This was written for... something.
The only sound in the room was the rhythmic ticking of the clock. It echoed through the rows and rows of shelves, muted only by the reams of paper bound in the thousands of forgotten tomes that filled the library. Under watch of the moon’s silver eye, cast from a high window, nothing moved. Nothing stirred.
Except in a single corner where a lone alicorn sat with a single candle. Her table was packed high with scrolls and her eyes drooped for want of sleep.
Twilight had opted for the library rather than her royal chambers because of the familiarity, having spent many hours there while a student at Celestia’s school. The books had been the subject of countless hours of studying but tonight they lacked the comfort they once held. Their watchful gaze deafening in its silence.
Again Twilight shook her head in an attempt to blink away the sleep and focused on the scroll before her.
To Her Majesty Princess Twilight Sparkle,
The Gryphons have again rejected your proposal for bilateral support in these trying times. They declare your overtures an insult to their people after the years of relations with Princess Celestia who…
The words dragged on but Twilight’s mind knew what her eyes lost in blurring lines. Why does their pride always get in the way? Celestia successfully negotiated with them so why can’t I?
She turned to the blank page before her. ‘To High Chancellor Bronzequill, How’s it going?’ She stared at the words, lingering on the absurdity of it, then smacked her head down on the desk.
“Uugh!” she groaned, wadding up the parchment with her magic but refusing to move from her position of surrender.
After all these years you’d think a filly would learn how to talk to officials properly.
It was probably the lack of sleep. For weeks now she had been attempting to provide relief for areas affected by severe crop blights. Hosting three committee meetings a day between four governments across two continents had begun to take its toll. Even lifting her pen had begun to seem a chore.
Would the world really end if I just took one night off? Probably, knowing my luck.
Even so it was tempting. She hadn’t even found time to talk with Spike, the last of her close friends still in Canterlot during the crisis. He had been tasked with organizing relief to the Zebrican nations from their own dwindling supply and had scarcely left the lower trade quarter.
She missed her friends, hated how duty drove them apart, but had long since resigned herself to the eventuality. It was a point of pride, but still…
With another sigh she slowly lifted her head, blinking with blearily determined eyes at the task before her, when something caught her attention.
Her nose twitched. Inhaling deeply she found her senses assaulted by a bitter yet creamy aroma.
Instantly she was reminded of days long ago spent pouring over books in the library, her library. She could see the grain of the shelves, smell the musty tomes new and old, hear the rustle of Owlicious’ feathers as he stood at his perch. Memories so sharp that for a moment she was lost in them. Hours, weeks, years in the old library flashed before her half lidded eyes.
She shifted her gaze from the piled scrolls to find...
Coffee. Caramel’s special blend. Hazelnut cream with two sugars. Sitting next to four neat stacks of parchment and a copy of Abacus Abstract’s Almanac of Gryphon Teachings and Traditions .
She blinked at the new additions dumbly, trying to force her sleep-addled brain to explain the sudden apparitions. Teleportation? Summoning? Flutterponies? Her mind cast about for any possible explanation but before she could even properly formulate a hypothesis she caught a hint of movement out of the corner of her eye. The tip of a purple tail disappearing around one of the towering bookcases.
She felt a slow smile spread across her face as she chided herself silently. Occolt’s Razor, silly filly.
She took a sip and felt warmth spreading down to the tips of her hooves, a slight hum in her mind that buzzed along pleasantly.
Once again alone, but not so lonely, she opened Abstract’s Almanac to chapter three and began reading. A soft tune bubbled forth unbidden from her lips, lending a comforting beat to the quiet library.
“Each one of us has something special,
Author's Note
Posted as it appeared in the April 2020 Writeoff - Alone Together
The rhythmic whirring was followed by a characteristically hollow thud as the TARDIS set down. Moments later the doors burst inward.
“Doctor, that thing is back!”
“Whot thing?”
“That thing! The one with the things, and the arms, and, and… and the space ship!”
“My dear Ditzy, that literally describes… forty-three percent of all encounters you’ve had as my assistant. Could you maybe be a little more descriptive?”
“Um, we met them in the future?”
“The now future or your future? Or was it that future where you met the future me and-”
“The future after we first met in Ponyville! Why do you always have to make everything so complicated?”
“Because half of all time is in the future. Well, give or take a few billion years. It’s very important we narrow down when you saw them. What else did you see?”
“Well, um,” Ditzy’s eyes screwed up in concentration for a moment. “The space ship! It looked like a muffin.”
“A Muffin?”
“With a hat.”
“What kind?”
“The Bowler kind.”
“Well,” said the Doctor, climbing out of the floor hatch, “Muffins in hats do sound rather sinister so I guess I could -”
“Oh! I remember! You said it had a pro-po-shoo-thingy that was kinda… wibbly-wobbly!”
“A Geldeon State Flux Drive with Tricentric Gravitron Rings?”
“That thing!”
“It must be Celendar Anticula from the third quadrant of the Gundai system! They are rather warlike around this time, what with their queen having been assassinated by the Arch Primate Prince and -”
“Doctoooor .” Ditzy wined from the doorway, “We need to go help them! Honeydew is down there.”
“Right, right. We just need to find the Supersubsonic Oscillation Distortion device.”
“Can’t we call it the other thing?”
“Fine. Grab the ‘Super Whistle’ and let’s go. Allons-y!”
Author's Note
. . .
When did I write this? I seriously don't remember. Sounds like something I'd do though.
