When Life Lemons You....

by Normalguy

Rating: teen
Tags: Alternate Universe, Human, Main 6, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Other, Adventure, Random, Crossover
Length: 10131

(WARNING:DISPLACED) I went to my first convention, I came to a land of ponies. It's time to ROCK their world. [Get it? Because Megaman's JPN name is ROCKman?] Oh and I'm Megaman now.

My first convention. A first for me, and some of my friends,but it all changed when I bought a thing that was hella cheap.

Not cool merchant guy.

(Note: The physics that affect the main character will be Super Smash based to a point, as well as Megaman physics.)

Teen because Teens swear, and so do I

Published 2015-07-25 01:20:02 UTC
Last updated 2015-11-25 19:55:25 UTC

PROLOG

PROLOG

FUCKING. SOMBRA

Imprisoning me because he couldn't take me like the little bitch he is! Here I am wrapped in chains, suspended above ground, and lastly trapped in nice shiny crystal. If I didn't look like Megaman and looked like a sexy person, this would be some sick album art.

=[ Timey wimey Rewindy ]=

FUCKING. SNOW

Coming out of a portal face first into the snow is shitty. With a straight 'FWUMP' I made a man shape hole in the ground. Quickly pushing myself up to the top of the hole I proudly made myself. I notice that there is snow, and lots of it. Fucking great.

It all had to be because of a sweet deal from that damn merchant. Remember if the deal is too sweet, then you'll die of sugar overdose. So don't do it.

Right now I am so pissed that I could kick a little puppy and not regret it. But I wouldn't do that because puppies are justice! Just like maids. As I though this out quickly in the middle of a blizzard looking to my left my hand was now Megaman's Megabuster. Freaky. I wish my left hand was back. He and I had a special relationship you could say. Does it change now that I'm Megaman? Guess Android pride ain't exactly important right now though.

Thrusting the gun arm out didn't do squat. No lemons, no pellet, no pixels, only disappointment and coldness. putting my arm cannon down with little feelings for it. Braving the cold I walked forward into the snow storm.

Wait i'm a robot I don't feel cold. I get cold.

=[Tickky skippy time moves forward, k?]=

I've been walking for god knows how long, maybe in a squiggle line, but most likely a circle. If only I had my friends here with me. Guess I just have to make it back...

Now that I think a little deeper then my old kiddie pool. I realize that I am quickly excepting fact that I have changed into Megaman. Blue diaper and all. Maybe it's because that Megaman is a robot, and that now i'm a robot I don't have a human brain anymore. Weird, I don't feel much emotion to my lost brain. Probably because I still remember a lot even without it. Neat.

Looking ahead I see faint outlines of houses. Not as big as the mountains I see in the background.

Walking closer revealed that the town was not abandoned at all, but it wasn't exactly thriving either. What was revealed was alot of tiny horses about coming to my chest I guess, hey that rhymed! All of the horses have chains around them and they're connected to each other, their faces are either crying or really depressed. And there's a unicorn?

Apparently there's unicorn in ponyland, how about that shit. but this unicorn looked liked it's was in his 'I'm this anime character' phase, mixed with emotality to the metal. Dude needs to get to life. Looks like a little bitch too.

" GET TO WORK MY SLAVES! THOSE WHO WORK HARDER MIGHT GET TO SLEEP TONIGHT! GWAHAHAHAHAHAHAH" The unicorn yelled as lightning appeared behind him.

I hid out of sight behind one of these homes. Okay. So this emocorn actually has a life. And it's evil. Like really evil. That ain't cool in my world, so doesn't that mean it shouldn't be cool everywhere else too? Most probably.

I could save them, but how... I cant use my gun arm. And I cant really use Megaman's powers... Maybe now would be the time to experiment. FOR JUSTICE?

FOR JUSTICE!

I I quickly experiment by balling my hand and opening it slowly, I felt a power well up inside me. That's got to be good, power is good. Closing it back to a fist makes it burst into a small flame. In That realization I open my hand back and start waving in my panic. It quickly goes away. At least I got some fire. I always did like fire.

Thinking about the fire it had to be Megaman's F-air. The Flame sword.

It originates form Megaman 8 from sword man.

Should I jump as I swing my flame fist forward? Only testing will work.

I jump with a little momentum and swing my fist down. Just as I guessed, the Flame sword appeared just like Smash. I guess I can do everything without the gun now. Which is about eight attacks I think. Still behind the house and the emocorn still being emo and a dominator to the slaves.

I guess I can fight him?

Man this is going to be the fight of the century. Megaman versus emocorn, with lots of fire and jumping. If only I could figure out how to use the Megabuster... Maybe I imagine it sinking in...

Nope.

Or I curl my hand into a fist.

Fire.

Maybe I have to do a motion. I chose the Spiderman pose.

Nothing.

Here I am hiding behind a house while there are hundreds of slaves and a dominator on the other side. Thinking quickly as much as my new brain can process, I think about everything I did in Smash with Megaman. Attacking, defending, grabbing, squeezing asses, lemons. taunting...Taunting! One of the Taunts had Megaman's arm change from a hand to the cannon. It's the one where he would throw his hand upwards diagonally, transform it into the cannon and then pumps back.

I follow the motions as well as the game would. Looking at my hand it was now the Megabuster. I do this with the other arm as well seeing if both arms could be utilized as cannons. Reflecting the motions across oppisite to the left way taunt now rewards me with my other hand now a Megabuster.

Now to shoot some fruit.

Standing still and pointing it forward gets me nothing. Maybe I needed to make some commands for it. Like a voice command when a magical girl casts a spell.

I think of the first word that comes to my mind when I play Megaman.

"LEMONS!" I said. Lo and behold three pellets came out and disappeared about 2 meters away. It suddenly got quiet. Not like it was loud before, but you get the point.

I found my magic.

I look around me to see that it was clear, but quiet. I peek around the house too see that all the slaves had stopped. And the emocorn was on the move.

" WHO SAID THAT!" He yelled to the crowd, or slaves in front of him. "WHO DARES SPEAKS OF FRUIT THAT SHALL NOT BE GIVEN!" I wonder what he has against lemons. This would be a great time for my entrance but it feels kinda lame. Take what you can get.

" I DID BITCH!" I yell back. From behind the house. " COME FIND ME LIKE THE LITTLE BITCH YOU ARE! BIIIIIIIIIITCH~!" To be honest it's kinda fun calling him a little bitch.

" WHO DARE HAS THE AUDACITY TO CALL KING SOMBRA THAT OF A FEMALE DOG! I SHALL TAKE PLEASURE IN REFORMING YOU!" Peeking around the house reveals that the emocorn, which is apparently named Sombra. Is pissed, so pissed he turned Emo-Sayian. On the raised area he's on it's now a giant aura of dark purple. Remember if the color is dark it usually symbolizes evil.

Megaman.

Sombra.

Emo-Sayian.

FUCK.

Maybe this one time I bit off more then I chew. But, hey when you go through life eating everything in a couple of bites, maybe I hit a rock or a bone, I still eat it. This case is more like a giant piece of stale bread with no water though.

"FIGHT ME LIKE A STALLION AND REVEAL YOURSELF!" He stomped the ground out of anger. Like a bitch would." THIS IS HOW IT'S GOING TO BE HUH? GUESS I'LL SET IT UP THEN!" Set what up?

The ground started to rumble. The ground next to me rose upwards. elevating a platform. It started to segment itself making stairs out of itself. It continued till it was about three times my own height. It combined the surrounding area of houses and pathways to make a arena with stairs on every fucking side.

FUCKING SOMBRA HAS A STAIR FETISH.

Gross..

I climb up the stairs one by one until I'm at the top. Sombra is there in the middle fuming with purple. The group of slave were off to the side but still chained to each other. They are looking between me and Sombra, as well as whispers started to flow within the group. And then there's me, a guy who's now a robot who looks like he's wearing a blue diaper. This is going to go swimmingly

Now it's time to D-D-D-D-D-D SMASH!

Author's Note

I don't own Megaman or anything related to it, he is owned by CAPCOM

And I just really like Megaman and his games. All of them.

New story, I hope you guys like it. If you have any questions or confusions you might have comment and I will reply with a hopeful answer.

I know that the writing isn't the best but I like it. And that's whats important :)

~Normalguy

P.s Megaman starforce series is cul

3. 2. 1. SMASH! (INSERT THE COMEONANDSLAM)

The Everfree Castle of the Celestial sisters)

"Sister!" A young alicorn called out." We must prepare for the worst." Luna said. Luna as a mare she would be big compared to the average pony but, to her sister she is slightly shorter then her. Having a navy blue coat and crystal blue eyes to compliment her coat. On her sides near the back legs, a mark of a crescent moon is placed. Her ethereal hair wavers with constellations of the night sky, able to make any astronomer stare in awe. She approaches her sister counterpart, Celestia.

"You're right about that, but with the Elements of Harmony all should be well and fine." The older mare said. Contrasting her younger sister, Celestia has a bright coat of a snow white color. Her lavender eyes as well compliment with the coat well. Usually the colors of purple and white are not complementary but when you see Celestia you know it works. You just do. Contradicting her sister's mark of the moon, Celestia bears a sun on herself. Her ethereal hair varies of four colors able to make rainbow sherbet jealous. " We should leave now to get Sombra off guard." She suggests.

" Off we shall go sister." Luna replied. " We shall show Sombra what happens when you dabble in the dark arts." Her muzzle made a slight frown as she walked ahead of her older sister.

" Let us depart." Celestia replied with a stoic face." ALL GUARDS ARE TO HOLD DOWN THE CASTLE!" She bellowed.

Celestia magicked a nearby balcony window open. With a running start she jumped over the stone railing and flapped her majestic wings. Luna followed the same motions as her sister and departed with relative silence, save for the sound of the occasional animal and of flapping wings in the distant horizon.

= Sceney segue =

Crystal Empire)

"ARE YOU THE ONE WHO DARES CALL A KING THAT OF THE FEMALE DOG!" Yelled Sombra to me across the arena he made. I guess yelling now is kinda okay as he's on the complete other side of the arena from me. At least being this far away it sounds like regular speaking but with intensity.

I walk closer to Sombra with slight caution in case he surprise attacks me like a little bitch. As well as I wouldn't have to yell back. I may be a robot now, but that doesn't make me immortal exactly. I mean I could still be explodededed. That would be bad.

I guess it's time to do what all people do before getting in to a fight; trash talking.

" Yeah, It was me!" I take one of my hands and point at my chest." That called you!" Now taking the hand and pointing at him." A little Biiiicth~" Case set, and score for me.

" HOW DARE YOU! I SHALL CHAIN YOU IN THE PLAZA FOR ALL TO SEE WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU GO AGAINST THE KING!" Kinky." NOW FACE ME AND THE POWER OF MY DARK ARTS!" The aura that surrounds him grew greatly in size. FUCK. This would be dramatic if I didn't laugh at it.

" HAH!" The aura around him disappeared, and now a surprised look covers his face mixed well with confusion." BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! OH~ MY~ GOODNESS~! DARK ARTS!?" I wiggle my fingers at him while shaking my head to mock him containing my laughter." That sounds so lame! You should add the word 'mysterious' in front to make it more 'edgy'." I pause to inhale. Do I even need to breath now that i'm a robot? " Wait! Don't do that I might get cut from how 'edgy' it is." I wave one of my blue hands while smiling as if I got cut and shook off the pain. Before I started laughing at him again.

"SILENCE!" The aura around him surged in size before shrinking back slightly. A wave of wind came at me, not like it did anything though. " Prepare to face defeat worm." Oh look he's actually kinda quiet for once. And he's galloping at me.

3.

2.

1.

SMASH!

With a smile I Jump above him while bringing the fist of flame. The flame extended forward slashing him. He backed away in surprise before grimacing in anger as he dodged away from it. As I hit the ground the flame dissipated, making the sword disappear.

" I see that there is more to you then what I see." Sombra said while distancing himself from me. Pure example of a little bitch move.

" Oh you wouldn't believe it." I do the taunt with my left arm transforming it into the Buster. This battle experience would now be the best time to experiment with my new weapons. Right now I'm wondering if I could duel power it right now. As if I could do Metal blade in one hand, and shoot lemons in the other. " Now eat some Lemons!" Bringing the gun arm forward, three pellets launched from the buster. I jumped away from while still facing him. " Eat your fruit like the little bitch you are!" I bring my right arm back feeling the flow of the power, something materialized in my hand.

Looking quickly, it's the infamous Metal Blade from Megaman 2. Grinning deviously I turn back to Sombra and throw the Metal Blade at him. He dodges sideways but it wont be enough. Landing on the ground I bring my arm back once again making another blade. Throwing it directly at him like a frisbee. Throwing backhanded will make it curve outwards and make towards the target if properly thrown.

Luckily I was on the Ultimate Frisbee team. But this creativeness will only work on the Metal Blade, but i'll have to experiment with other weapons at another time to see what will work. The Blade itself did curve outwards. Sombra looked at it before speaking.

" What was that?" He said smirkingly." Do you not know how to aim?" karma is going to bite him hard.

"You know you should pay attention to your surroundings more." He looks at me quickly before I point at the incoming blade. Eyes widening he dodges by a hair.

" What trickery is this!?" He screams towards me. The Blade that flew by him soon disappears in a small poof of smoke. He looks at me with slight fear after seeing the unknown happen." What magic do you have!?" He says fearfully.

" No magic only metal." Not completely wrong. " Let's SMASH!" Bringing the Megabuster up towards him, It starts to hum with a blue energy." The Megabuster is charging... I learned something new." With a small smirk I charge it to full power before it fires on it's own.

*KA-PEW!(Couldn't think of a sound that would work)* The blast of the laser was wide and round and really big. Even from the ground it's really big.

Sombra only had less then a second before putting up a shield. The blast impacted him forcing him to grit as the shield held up by his magic took the hit for him. Releasing the magic he started to pant for air. I on the other hand saw the aftermath of the shot. The area that the charge shot flew scraped against the ground making a small crude groove throughout it's way to Sombra. Sombra is now breathing heavily .

"Is that all you got. Bitch~?" I say bitch in a sing song voice. I transform the Buster arm back to a hand and place both hands on the rim of my diaper. "Cause you can forfeit, it's pretty one sided so far after all." I'm starting to sound cocky. Who wouldn't after fighting a emo nerd who barely fights back.

"It's not over yet...*Cough, cough* I'm just getting started." He stares at me with an edgy glare.

" Ah. Stop your cutting me with that sharp glare." I say in a deadpanned voice. This only proceeds to anger him.

" Take this!" Whipping his head towards me, he shot a dark magical beam. How did he not get whiplash from that? I jump out of the way only to have the beam fallow me upwards. Now would be a good time to see if I can double jump. Quickly taking a crouching position as i'm falling I push my legs off the air.

And this is how I learned to double jump. Weird. The sensation of being able to, not only break physics in it's entirely, but to also jump off of nothing is like jumping off a cotton ball. You'll know it's there but you still feel like it's nothing. That's what double jumping feels like.

Now my momentum from the second jump is carrying me towards Sombra. I look back to see the beam still on my non existent tail. Landing on the ground I make a mad dash for Sombra. Sombra only stood there charging another magic spell.

"I see, he's trying to cut off both ways. Let's see whose plan will work." Thinking quickly as Sombra released another beam of magic towards me. The up special would be most useful right now. If I have to say commands for shooting, maybe it will be the same? The only words that could come to my mouth is..." UP DOG!" Instantaneously I rocketed towards the sky. It worked, another test completed. Rush appeared, and disappeared as soon as he came. I guess I won't be able to use Rush for many other things.

With the sudden change in direction the spell still went toward Sombra, and the blast that Sombra was charging clashed with each other resulting in a bang of dark sparkles. Since I got my second jump back, I use it to jump towards Sombra. Quickly taunting midair to change an arm to a Buster. I could only think of one weapon that would work here.

" GET FISTED, BITCH!" He got the fist hard. The hard knuckle. From hard man.

Now above Sombra, I put the Buster cannon above him only for a rocket fist to hit him directly in the muzzle sending his head into the arena. Footstooling his body for insult and a safe landing. I land victorious.

Holding a fist high into the sky. I yell for my victory.

"VICTORY!" I make a peace sign towards the slave group. They all stare in awe of my awesomeness or blue diaper, cause you know. it's kinda cool too. They whisper to each other making some sort of conversation. I walk towards them only to be wrapped in chains. " What the shit!?" The chains wrap all around me securing me tight. Six chains from the ground now wrap my body. This is some kinky shit right here I tell you h'what.

" I told you..." Sombra...

Shit.

"I told you I would chain you up..." He rose off the ground. With blood dripping all over his face, he spits out some more blood. With his eyes a pitch black color with smoke trails coming off of it."NOW SLEEP FOR ETERNITY!" He shot a beam at my chest.

The magic made a crystal encase my body growing out from the middle of my chest. The crystal grows outward extending to the ground and above my head. And now this is where I stop. For now.

My eyes shut off.

Fucking. Little. Bitch.

=[Character CHANGE!]=

"Sister, did you see that?" Luna said." It's combat prowess is like nothing we have seen before." She finished amazed.

" You're right about that, but why was it fighting Sombra?" Celestia questioned to no one in particular." Perhaps after we subdue Sombra we can free him as well." The feeling of a new ally, and a hidden power for Equestria to gain put thoughts of ruling Equestria safely in her mind.

Sombra isn't paying any attention to those around him as he has 'defeated' the mysterious object. Out of energy, Sombra went over to the group of slaves commandeering them.

" As you can see... This is what would happen to you if you were to defy my will." Sombra said coldly. The enslaved ponies reacted by shivering in fear, the feeling of freedom fading away from their souls, never to return. Sombra walked away from the group hoping to return to the castle to regroup and recover.

"That damn monster did more damage then I thought... It will take some time to recover." He thought.

"SOMBRA! PREPARE TO MEET YOUR END!" Shouted Luna. Sombra with wide eyes turned his attention to Luna.

"Oh hello there. I see you have come to defeat me. But you won't be able to. Not with your strength." Though out of breath and mentally exahusted, Sombra could still put up a mental barrier. But would it be enough?

" You may be right about me not having the strength, but together we do!" As Luna said this Celestia appeared on the other side of him, but away from him.

" Now with the power of harmony..." Celestia started as she brought out the raw forms of the Elements of Harmony and levitated them around Sombra forming a hexagon like barrier. "We shall defeat you!" Rainbows flew from both of sister entwining Sombra.

"ARRRRRRRRGH~!" Sombra cried out of pain.

"NO, it won't end like this..." He said while the mystical rainbow ribbon went to wrap him." I shall curse this place, never to return until the rightful king has returned... I WILL RETURN!" With that said, Sombra shot out a burst of the dark arts. Like a signal flare it went high into the sky before bursting, covering the empire. Sombra got blasted into the mountains sealed by the very elements themselves.

" Sister!" Luna called out." We must escape!" Darkness was cascading around the empire.

Celestia nodded, and took off soaring with wings. With a grit to her mouth and tears in her eyes knowing they could not save the enslaved. Luna took to the sky as well. Escaping the falling darkness before they were caught, they landed outside the empire's borders with little time to spare. Both of the sisters landed next to each other watching the empire being covered in darkness.

They watched the Empire as it get's covered in darkness. As it looks the Empire looks as it's a giant dome of darkness.

It shrank away into nothingness.

Leaving only to sisters in the cold.

They left for their home.

Author's Note

Woohoo Another chapter.

Any questions will be answered

Critique will hurt me. So maybe do it :/

~Normalguy with love:heart:

THE RETURN OF THE BICH KING {1}

Canterlot)

"And that is what happened about a thousand years ago." Celestia said to Twilight. Celestia stood alone with Twilight in the throne room." Though the Empire reappearing is all well. It will also mean that Sombra has awakened." She said somberly." You must find the Crystal heat and save the Empire. And if you can save the mysterious being, he may help you if he can."

" Yes, princess, I will be sure to meet your expectations." Twilight said with pride. Her current appearance as a unicorn has a lavender shade for her coat with a darker shade for her mane with a pink highlight near the side of it. Her mane's style is simply cut straight and neat. As expected from a on point student. On her haunch lays the six pointed star representing magic.

" I know you will Twilight." Celestia said with a motherly smile. But the smile soon turned into a small frown. " Shining Armor and Princess Cadence are already there. They have also been briefed on the situation, and are trying to rescue the being, as well as protecting the Empire. You must hurry quickly and help them. Now go." Twilight nodded and walked away from the princess before leaving to gather her friends. " I know you will succeed Twilight." She thought as Twilight left.

-M-

Train station after the ride}

Twilight and her friends have exited the cold station and went to see the outside. Though they were expecting more then they saw on the train, it was still the same with all the snow. Shining Armor has gone to meet up with them and guide them back to the barrier, but along the way Sombra appeared.

" Twily! You girls have to go ahead!" Shining shouted across the barren plain of snow." Don't worry about me i'll catch up soon." He stops to confront the looming shadow with eyes.

Twilight understood with complete trust. She ran along with her friends with the Empire's barrier in sight. With time to spare Twilight along with her friend made it into the barrier. Twilight looked back to where her brother should have been. Within the moment, Shining appeared, but not without Sombra on his tail. Shining was about to make it until he slipped up, as Sombra took heed to this.

Shining got enveloped by the shadow only to fight his way out, but not without getting hurt. The girls watched in horror as Shining made it into the barrier. Twilight walked over to her brother with worry. Shaking his dizziness off both sibling assess his damage. They both gasp as they lay their eye's on his horn. Before the horn was majestic, with that spiral around the core, the prime color of white, and the pointyness of a shish-ka-bob. But now it is slandered and shamed by Sombra as he has covered it in dark crystals nullifying any magic impossible.

" Brother! Are you feeling okay?" Twilight asked as she inspected the rocks on Shining's head with worry.

" Nghh... I'll be fine. * Coughs* Let's go to Cadence. Now!" Though out of breath and damaged Shining pushed on.

As they walked to the castle the girls look at their surroundings. They all notice the buildings made of chiseled crystals straight from the ground, but that's not all they notice. A crowd gathers around a deep purple crystal pillar. Upon closer inspection from the girls they notice that the crowd is the very residents themselves.

" Shiny? What are they doing?" Twilight asks as they make their way around the crowd. Murmurs and whispers dance across the crowd, but nothing clear enough to hear.

" They're trying to get it out. When Cadence and I got here the ponies started to gather around that pillar. We didn't feel like we needed to do anything as of now, but we might just need it's help." Shining continued to walk towards the destination while explaining it. With a small smile he turned towards Twilight's group. "Were almost there come on."

The group walked though the castle's doors and halls until they went into the throne room. Upon opening the door Twilight was filled with hope of seeing her old foal sitter. But what she saw was simply something else. Her once elegant foal sitter, now messy and disheveled. Twilight thought that seeing Cadence would be a wondrous time, but Cadence looked worse for wear.

A multiple pinging sound resonances from the outside. Completely ignored to all.

"Cadence! Are you okay?" Twilight said with worry as she walked over to her old foal sitter. The rest of the girls gathered around listening to their conversation.

" I'll be fine *winces in pain* I just need to keep this shield up a little longer..." She staggers across to Twilight. Twilight's eyes open wide upon realization.

" You can't do this to yourself. You have to-" Twilight started with worry for Cadence.

" I can't do that Twilight!" Cadence interrupts her." If I rest then HE would come." She stumbles a little then stabilizes herself.

The pinging sound continues into a cracking sound.

" Sombra?" Twilight questions. Cadence nods wearily in return."What can we do to help." Accepting the fact that Cadence couldn't rest as of right now accepts it.

" I don't know much.*Stumbles* But you might find some information in the library... Hurry..." Cadence staggers hard like liquor, she almost falls until Shining catches her.

" Girls, let's go help." Twilight said. Each of them nodded and left the castle.

Outside the castle the ponies have broken the prison of the creature. The crowd around the mysterious creature grows louder.

"How can we wake him up?" One of the 'crystal' ponies ask.

" He's still wrapped in chains, What can we do?" Another asks.

"Let's do the same thing we did to get it out." A crystal pony with a pickax says.

" Do you think it will hurt him?" He responds.

"DO FIRST THINK LATER!" The 'crystal' pony with the pickax rises with it in hoof raising to strike.

The girls witness the scene as he is about to strike. They look with a questioning gaze until it the pickax strikes. A loud clang rings through the silence. The girls run up to the pickax wielding pony. The pony in name has a mull green coat with a small rock crossed over with a pickax for a mark. His mane a brown color like tree bark. Like tree bark *Author nods his head continuously and slowly like he just let it happen*. His eyes a contrasting blue bringing the look together.

" What are you doing!?" Twilight yells at him while stepping between the chained and he pony." You're going to hurt it!" The girls make a defensive circle around the chained.

-M-

It's loud. I like to sleep, who doesn't. I hear sounds of people yelling. Why would there be people at home yelling. Ma and Pa don't yell at each other. And that sound isn't a lawnmower... It's not a alarm either. I guess I should wake up...

I 'open' my eyes to see a scene that would make a god of chaos proud. Oh yeah ponylandia, emocorn, all around me are unfamiliar ponies, talking cronies and a guy with a pickax and butts. Six butts of difference color all surround me, My uncomfortableness intensifies. Hm, they're all talking about something.

" But we have to free him! He is our only hope!" Pickax pony said. Yelling at the ponies that surround me. Sounds like they should just free him then.

" But you'll hurt it like that!" The purple one reasons." You're going to have to find a different way to free him." This talk is like when there's some kind of when there's a trapped animal and they don't know how to get it out.

" There's no time for it! We must free it now!" He tried to reason. The purple one stayed silent. Me being Megaman made a mega suggestion.

" Why don't you just use magic?" I say sarcastically. If magic got me in, it can get me out? All the ponies stare at the new sound which is me. Yeah I know, pretty awkward. " Was it something I said?" Looking around gives me mostly surprised faces. "Where's the problem? Brute force solves everything." Always.

"He might be right about that." The blue one with a rainbow mane said.

"Always." The rainbow one nods in approval. " I got this shit." Famous last words. I push against the chains. With some strenuous effort the chains start to break. "Fuck yeah, breaking shit." My family always called me out for breaking stuff. With a burst The chains fly everywhere. I get off the ground standing, while brushing off any dust. The chains disappear like dead enemies in Zelda. "So where's the problem?" I look around and I see a multitude of faces.

A couple of them are scared, but most seemed relieved for the most part. A couple of them are happy. And then there's that yellow one that's cowering in fear? A voice yells out the problem.

" Sombra is the problem!"I hit my hand in realization that he's right.

" Oh yeah. Where is he?" I look around an all I see are ponies.

" You're coming with me!" The purple one yells in my face. I back up as she advance.

" Uhhhh. No." I use one of my fingers to push her back.

"Why? You have to help us." She pleaded.

"Who's making me?" This is really one sided, like a fake coin. Or one cut in half.

"..." She puts a pouty face on while thinking hard. Her face starts to puff, then turn red." BUT YOU HAVE TOO SO I CAN PASS!" She screamed in my face.

" Fucking rude." I push her back surprising her and everyone around me. Wouldn't this be the normal reaction to some animal yelling in your face? " Look I got my own problem, like me going home. But these horses over here..." I gesture to the enslaved ponies." Were enslaved so I came to rescue them."

The purple horse looks at me mouth agape. She put's a thoughtful face thinking of a solution. she apparently get's an idea as she started to talk again.

" Why don't we team up?" She bats her eyes and tries to make a cute face. Kinda creepy, especially after yelling in my face. Yandere much?

" Where's the advantage in it." I question back. RPG lesson 101: When you team up with someone, it might be permanent. A good example is Drachma.

" Well Sombra is the common enemy, right?" She turns and smile at me." An you know what they say.'The enemy of my enemy is my friend'.Right~?"

"Nice, but no." She reels back as if she just got hit in the face. She turns around after gathering with five other ponies. I assume she's on some kind of mission. I turn to the pickax pony to speak with him.

" What's with them?" I ask.

" We don't know sir." I raise an eyebrow? Do I have those?" As we were trying to free you-" So they freed me, noice." - they appeared and halted our movements." He said as if he was trained to speak like this.

" Do we know what they are here for?"

" No sir. We assume that she is to help against Sombra. As she has said so herself." Makes sense.

" I see. Wanna team?" I ask Pickax. I'm naming him that.

" I would be honored to sir." Teammate get?

" Let's go somewhere else." I point a random direction opposite from the group of six. The enslaved ones moved away allowing us to leave." Hey you.." I wave a random pony over. A girl horse came over... A mare it's called? Probably.

"Y-yes sir?" She looked at me with slight fear. "D-d-do you need something?"

"Yeah...What's your name first of all." I ask quietly.

"Crystal Shard sir" Crystal's appearance right now has a light blue coat but dirtied with soot. Her mane a darker shade, it would look good if not for the dirt. A mark on her butt shows diagonal crystal shard with two smaller ones flaking off it. Her eyes a silvery color. Though she fears it now deep down she has hope. Probably.

" I have a job for you. Are you up for it?" She nods quickly. "Okay. So those six over there-" I point at the still huddled group. They like to take their time don't they." -are about to be done talking, so you need to tell them what happened. But not at the same time." Her face showed true fear at this, as she didn't know what I am talking about. "Uhhh, and by that I mean you tell them we went a different way. Got it?" Her face changes to a jovial expression as she nods. "I'll see you later. Come on Pickax." I start walking away from the group,

The group re-closes around the huddled ponies. Pickax and I walkaway.

" What's your name?" I ask Pickax. That's what I call him. But that's probably not his name.

" My name? It's Rock Pick, sir." That's kind of a weird name. But I wouldn't say that, no one would, because it's not the cool thing.

" I'm gonna still call you Pickax, okay?"

"Yes sir." He trots along with me by my side.

" Cool, so where would Sombra be? It's time to beat down a little bitch."

Author's Note

i COULD OF RELEASED THIS EARLIER

IF I MADE IT SHORTER

~Bloop
anyways it's been awhile nothing much has happened just a slow person in general. blame the government .

Any questions will be answered so just give me a comment if you want to, or life advice.

It's senior year.

~Normalguy.

THE BICH KING RETURNS {2}

Pickax and I walk through the empire towards the castle to look for clues. I always like a good mystery murder, but there's no murder or a mystery for any part. We we've through the buildings going through alleyways and streets.

" Right now he's outside. The barrier that is placed prevents him from coming in. But it won't work, it's just not the same." He looks away and downward. Why you do dis to me Pickax, why you so pessimistic?

"Tell me the why it won't work." Always learn because knowledge is power and if book is thrown at you it's going to hurt. That's what happens when you don't knowledge. " You seem to know about it." We stop at what seems like an area with a pedestal, wonder what goes on it?

" Yeah I do." He said with confidence. " The barrier now is a nothing but a proxy. Before this there was a crystal king and queen. Each of them were both kind and understanding of the ponies." Dang, sounds like good people." But their chancellor betrayed them with Dark arts. He wanted progress and expansion, he thought that we were stalling and killed the king and queen." Pickax grits his teeth almost hard enough to bleed. With some notice to this he stops. " Gaining power with Dark arts he became the ruler he wanted. He soon enslaved all and hid the crystal." That's some info alright.

" Crystal? What crystal?"

" Oh, sorry didn't notice there. The crystal i'm talking about is called the crystal heart. It's a magical artifact from past times. I don't know much but with the help of the locals ponies and the hierarchy of the king and queen it would erect a barrier strong enough to stop all weather from the outside affecting the inside. It's pretty powerful for what it is."

" So where is it? "I wonder if there is some kind of system to these magical artifacts? This heart crystal seems like one of a legendary class.

"We don't know." Well shit. " Sombra hid it somewhere here." He gestures to the castle.

"Let's go find it."

We walk into the castle entering uninvited. The castle is pretty cool. it looks like it was made from a single crystal then it was sculptured to what it is. Pretty neat.

"So do you know your way around this castle?" I ask Pickax."Cause I sure as hell don't." I may be Megaman, but that doesn't mean a minimap in my vision. That would be cool though.

We pass through halls and more halls each looking the same as the last one. That map thing would be nice now.

"Yes, I do know my way around."Huh, pretty neat." This way." He points his hoof towards a double door. The pair of doors are different from the rest maybe this is the throne room?

"Is this the throne room?" I ask in question.

"Yes sir. How did you know?" He looked at me with a slightly surprised face.

"Cause I do?" I say in a questioning tone. Would it be alright to walk in? The six ponies down there seem to not be from here. Their coats are much cleaner and brighter then the other ponies in that regard. maybe they were more up to date. maybe there's some new ponies in here too. "Wait." I hold back Pickax. "Do you think there are ponies in there?" I ask him. Make this shit tactical.

"Yes. Two new rulers came in as soon as we could recognize." He replies. This is so tactical, talking outside a door.

" Do you now them?" Maybe there with the new ponies.

"No sir. But they are not an enemy sir." That kinda makes it easier.

"Mmmmk. Let's go." I walk closer to the door and put both my palms against it. I take a breath. And push the doors as hard as I can.

Mistake number one.

The doors fly open at a fast speed making a loud crash against the walls they slam into. cracks form along both the wall and the door. Oops.

I stare at my hands dumbfounded at what has happened. Did I always have this strength? Did Megaman have this strength? I guess being a robot is pretty cool. after staring at my new and destructive strength, I walk in without looking at my surroundings.

Mistake number two.

Not giving a shit about the surroundings I walk in towards the throne. Pickax comes up by me as i walk towards the throne trying to ignore my mistakes.

"Umm, sir?" He asks cautiously." Shouldn't you meet the new ponies?" He sates as he points a lazy hoof towards the ponies in the corner.

One off the ponies with a toothpaste mane and a white coat stands guard staring near me menacingly. Not cool brah. He seems to be standing in front of a wobbling pony as if he was guarding her. The wobbling pony on the other hand staggers and looks absolutely ragged as if it became drunk and decided to go for a jog to sober up, only for it to fail and barf on the side of the road she was jogging on. And I think she has wings? Can't see shit with that guy in front of her.

"Are you friend? Or are you foe?" The tooth paste stallion asks. He points his horn hoping to do something. It looks like its covered in crystals or something.

"I don't know." I state bluntly. The reply shocks the male horse. Yes that's what it is." I mean would you call us friends?" I follow up. I just met the guy. You can't be friends with someone unless you encounter them four times at least.

" Are you with Sombra!" He shouts. He pants in anticipation of my answer.

"Not really!" I shout back." He kinda tried to kill me or something. I don't know what do you think?" I finish with a shrug and a question as I turn to Pickax.

"No sir you are not." Damn right i'm not. "And the spell that he cast on you indeed was supposed to kill you." Oh... Good to know. I make a face as if I was looking for an explanation. Pickax caught on to this. "The crystal was supposed to suffocate you until you had a eternal sleep, not to mention the chains." He quietly explains to me.

" Gotcha." I finger gun him and turn back to the guard horse. Now he seems less tense but still on guard. " Change my answer! We are definitely against Sombra!" His less tense body turns into a sigh of relief. I walk towards him. to have a conversation. Like normal people, except that we are a robot and a pony with a horn. At least we can talk to each other though. " So what's going on?" I start.

At this he looks at me with an 'are you fucking dumb?' face. It kind pissed me off, but hey, who am I to know pony expressions. He could be making the 'I'm-a-so happy to see ya' face. But it still looks like the first face I mentioned.

"Have you not seen what's going on!?" He gets closer to my face as he speaks." Sombra is out there, The shield is barley holding on and my wife..." He points a hoof at her. "..Is on the verge of exhaustion. How do you think it's going?" He finished speaking his stress stopping really close o my face.

"Dude, don't be an ass." I push him away from me. I mean who wouldn't? " We'er here to find a something what was it?"I forgot. Whoops.

"Its the crystal sir." Pickax answers.

"Points to this guy." I point at him with a smile, and then I turn back to the other guy to continue. "That's the thing we'er here for."

"Then why are you here?" The guard, that's the temporary name for this toothpaste guy is. "What makes you think that it would be here?"

"Cause its the throne room. Why wouldn't it be here?" He looks at me as if i'm stupid." This is the throne room, right?" I whisper to Pickax. He points to the obvious throne as an answer. "More points to ya bud." I tell the guard are intentions, kinda. He doesn't, really need to know. " Now if you excuse me we gotta save the world. Maybe." I turn around and walk away towards the throne.

"Wait!" A different voice appears! A much higher pitched one then everyone else's. not to mention it sounded like lady. It was probably that wibble wobble pony, no one expects the wibble wobble. I turn around to be greeted to the ragged girl horse. She leans on the guard horse to catch her breath and starts to speak. "You are here to help. Aren't you?" She puts on a depressed face mixed with a big eyes. A weakness appeared,

I sigh as I contemplate my choices. I mean I could help them no repercussions but then it would be of no use to me. Or I could just say 'Fuck it!' and do my own thing. but then I would have like no one on my side. But I have to respond soon. I guess I'll go with the neutral thing I can think of.

"Kinda." This just baffles her. As well as the guard pony. I tap the side of Pickax to get his attention and point towards the throne. "Time to investigate!" I say out loud. "Let's go! I point towards the throne. Pickax and I walk over to the crystal throne.

Oh oooo. The throne itself looks fabulous as the whole thing is made out of crystals. More crystals spike our the back and around giving a badass feel along with grace, not to mention the color harmonizes with me. FABULOUS! But one thing that caught my attention is the object jutting out more on the top of the throne. It seems some kind of gem balances on the tip as if it was a crowning piece making it come together. I point at it from where we are.

"That's the thing." The crystal that's on top is not only different but its also chipped in various places. I aint no puzzler but this is kinda obvious. I look towards the ceiling to see if there's a window making the light go through the crystal, and then it would pinpoint it, then it would be happily ever after. Except there's no window. " Now what?" I ask to anybody in particular.

"What do you mean sir?" Pickax questions back.

"What I mean is that this thing here..." I point a hand at it. "...Is the key to getting to the thing." I mean I have an Idea, if nothing happens but we can see if we can do it the puzzley way. Or physical force, cause that fixes everything, and always will. "So who know what to do with it?" I ask to the three other ponies.

The others look like they want to help but they can't in their own way. The toothpaste one has crystals over his horn. The girly one looks absolutely exhausted, and Pickax looks like he was about to explain something.

"I'm sorry sir but I can't help you in this situation." I ask why he couldn't help. "Sombra is a unicorn, and as you can see, I have no horn." he explains.

"So that means we need something with a horny thing." Everyone looks at me weirdly. I'm not exactly wrong, right? " So what did Sombra do with his magic to hide it away then?"

"None of us know sir. He had no guards to stay in the throne room while doing personal business. Even when some would sneak in after, all report that he has disappeared." Mysterious.

" Absolutely riveting my dear Watson." I say in a shitty accent. Do I even need to tell you which one it was? Bohemian. I continue in the same accent, confusing all of them. "Now look here." I say walking towards the front of the throne."Now you say all of your sources say he disappeared after. Am I right?" Pickax nods. "That could mean many things here. But I can only see three things that are possible. I hold up my hand readying my fingers. I put the first one up.

"Numbah one. Sombra has an illusion for his personal business." Which could be nasty if that's the case. I extend my second finger. "Numbah twoooo..." Yeah I extended the pronunciation of 'two'. "His throne..." I point to it to explain. "...Has a secret entrance from there." I turn back to the crowd of three and extend a third and final finger. " And finally, Sombra does some magic thing to that crystal making the entrance appear to the secret hideaway thingy." I finish explaining all of it. I look to the ponies to see their faces. They seems to have faces of dumbfounded-ness. " So which one do you think works?" I question in my 'normal' voice.

"Sir! Number two has to be incorrect!" He states as a fact.

"Explain why!" I say while giving him the old fire bird point.

"YES SIR! Before you came there was a small rebellion hoping to overthrow Sombra before it was to late. As you have mentioned that number two being a possibility, but we have had spies inspect the throne to find nothing out of the ordinary leaving the conclusion that the throne has no mechanical mechanism as of notice. But I believe number three to be a possibility, sir!" Good testimony right there it is.

"Good Job explaining. Now that we have succeeded in removing the possibility that what was one of them. ” Then it has to be magic to get to the place of the thingy. Right?" Pickax nods, and the couple looks skeptical. "Now that is out who can do magic?" I look to the couple as Pickax already told me that he is no magic.

The two of them whisper to each other, and it look like that the pink one is talking more then toothpaste guard. The guard talks back with a slightly higher tone. As if he is getting angry over something. Suddenly the pink one speaks up. Though still out of breath.

" I can help out with the first possibility." She says just loud enough so I can hear it.

"EXPLAIN! GO!" I point a finger of justice looking for the answer.

"Using my magic I could detect the use of magic last used. Sombra's magic should be pretty distinguishable for it to find here." She explained the process well. Use magic to solve magic, genius!

"Okay then. Do it." She nods and puts magic, I assume, into her horn.

The magic erupts in a pulse spreading a shimmering wave throughout the room eventually fading as it reaches farther out. I assumed she finished her detection. Her face turns into confusion. Before I could ask, she already started to explain.

"Magic was used here, but it's not illusion magic." I ask why it wouldn't be. "Magic has different wave lengths for different spell simply. And this wave I feel is not illusionary." She reasons.

"I see that means it could only be one thing. Right?" All of them nod. "Now where would it be?" I fake question. " It can't be up as the ceiling reaches to far. you would need stairs to go that high. Now what do you think about here?" I ask as I stand at the bottom of the step way infront of the throne. "YOu know that he use magic, I assume, to get there right?" The girl nods to confirm. "But none of us can use his magic, right?" All three nod. "Now what would you think is the best way to solve it?" Before anyone could ask I answer it myself.

"Brute force." The couple's eyes widen at this. like they never heard of raw strength being used to solve a problem. "Right here is a good spot right?" I ask, but not really.

" Now let's just..." I prepare to punch the ground, but something happens first. "SMASH!" I throw the anticipated fist hoping to crack the floor. But I didn't see a fist. The arm turned into a gun. Though not as blunt as a fist, the nozzle of the gun makes a point stabbing the crystal floor. Cracks appear in the crystal underneath it but what happens next no one expected.

A small flame sparkles underneath the cracks. At first I thought it was a malfunction, but then I remembered something: Smash bros. Not to mention that I also said the best word to smash something. And you know what that means?

A pillar of flame erupts from the cracks burning anything inside of it. I feel the heat around me but I pay it no mind. The heat itself feels more like a comforting warm draft of wind, except my vision is covered in flame. The flames disappear leaving a scene of burnt crystal that is half destroyed. It look like I weakened it but its still not enough. Then again it's not a good thing for fire to be used against stone. And then again it wouldn't be a good idea to use fire even if accidental.

I look back to the charred spot. I touch it to see how brittle it is. As I touch the crystal it crumbles in my hand. It's not completely ashes but it still crumbles apart. The crystal feels a little bit warm. Sot if the fire was a warm breeze and this burned stone is warm. I guess I'm heat resistant? Should of thoght of that back when I used a sword of pure flame. Hey, who am I to think to deep into something.

I think back to anything that could help smash through this. I could physics it by heating up the crystal and then cooling it down at a fast rate making it eventually crumble, cause it's a crystal it is possible to do it. I think. Don't quote me on that. I keep thinking back and nothing really pops into my mind.

I think to the battle I had with sombra. And then suddenly a new idea forms into my mind.

=M=

The main six were in a predicament. The being has escaped. The test still continues. Twilight has madness. And now they talk to each other.

" Uh hey girls?" Rainbow asks. " Where's the thing?" She says hovering above the rest of them. "Cause I don't see him anywhere around." She says while scouting the crowd of crystal ponies surrounding them.

The six ponies stop talking for a moment and take a look around looking towards the crowd. Rainbow takes initiative as she takes a quick flight scouting the crowd looking for the metal bot. She flies back to her group to report.

"He's not anywhere around here." She aid while checking once over again.

"WHAT! Where could he have gone? Why would he have gone?" Twilight says with worry. Im sure here grade is in trouble.

"Well maybe we should ask some of these ponies around if they saw him dear." Rarity interjects. Twilight gives a compliment in reply to Rarity's Idea.

"HAS ANYPONY SEEN THE BEING THAT WAS IN THE CRYSTAL?" Twilight says to the crowd. The crowd's attention was slightly focused on them, but it wasnt their full attention.

The crowd stayed silent in return.

"Uhh. where they always like this?" Applejack asks to Twilight. "Cause I don't think they were like this."

"Why are they not saying anything?" She asks to no one in particular.

"I saw him." A crystal pony asks. Crystal Shard steps out of the crowd. The crowd of ponies separate leaving her alone. She quickly takes notice as this happens and starts to fluster about it.

"You did? Where?" Twilight asks her as she trots lightly to her. Twilight stares intensely at Crystal making her fluster more.

" Uh, um, That way!" She points away from the castle and towards the barrier boundary.

" That way? But that's outside. Why would he go that way?" She says.

" Now wait just one minuet here." Applejack interjects." Are you lying here? Cause we wouldn't like that." She says giving a disappointing look at Crystal. Under Applejack's gaze she starts to sweat almost breaking down.

"NO!" Crystal said this in a out of tone voice. She quickly covers her mouth in embarrassment and then recomposes herself. "I mean, no. why would i do that." She finishes with a smile. Applejack just continues to look at her.

"Is that what he told you to do?"

"Yeah why would you-" Crystal covers her mouth as she let it slip.

"I see. So that means you were lying. I guess he's not out there."

"Then where Applejack?" Twilight ask.

"Pshh why are you asking Applejack like she knows Twilight?" A wild Pinkie appeared. Twilight looks at pinkie slightly annoyed at the fact that her grade is at stake.

" Does that mean you know Pinkie?" Twilight counters back.

"Yeah, he went that way." She points to the castle." I saw him as he left." Twilight didn't even ask about it.

"Come on girls let's go to the castle." Twilight gallops off ant the girls follow in tandem orientation leaving the crystal ponies behind. Crystal stood there alone among the group.

"It's not like I mind being left alone." She thought as she sheds a single tear. The ponies around started to wonder what would happen next. Crystal stayed there alone. Poor crystal.

Suddenly the sky darkened. The attention of the crystal ponies were brought to the barrier as they saw. Sombra's cloud of darkness encompassed half of the barrier. A shock went through the barrier making it flicker. The crystal group scattered while screaming in terror.

The barrier fell.

Author's Note

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH screamings and stuff.

AH this could of came out a lot sooner then later. ahhhh.

I have been just going through alot of stuff lately in school.

It's all over with (for now) but now I have college and stuff. (Applications and shit)

It's mostly personal stuff, so if you have any questions ask me in the comments or scare me with a PM.

If you find any mistakes tell me cause I care.
~Normalguy.