Bucking Above Your Weight

"Hey, Daylight!" Bon Bon asked, standing up straight besides Melissa. "Do you mind if I ask something, maybe something odd?"

She had long gotten past giggling at her nickname, although it often gave her a smile. Something to do with Pinkie's love for red-haired humans compared to how irked she's been with Twilight... I guess it's a hell of a lot better than 'Scamper', 'Snoopy', and the like that Pinkie has branded on those poor human visitors. She looked back at the chipper mare. "Sure."

"Why do you always sit on benches like that, Daylight?" Bon Bon asked, sliding her head down. "You sit like I sit. Like ponies sit. You don't try to stick out your legs like other humans and... uh... Lyra does."

"Maybe if the benches weren't so damn short," she replied. She shifted over, danging her legs in the air in front of the bench. "And I don't want to trip anyone." She paused, not sure how to respond to Bon Bon's blank expression. "Or, what the hell, maybe I just subconsciously want to be a mare just like the rest of you." She snorted as she laughed. I suppose that might make finding a guy out there a hell of a lot easier!

"Okie-dokie!" Bon Bon commented, pushing a hoof through her mane. Daylight watched as the mare flipped around and headed on down the street. Daylight's eyes traced Bon Bon's fluttering tail, her hair rubbing up against her smooth flanks. Is that what the human guys see in them? The tails? The manes? The personalities?

Daylight whistled, moving over and just gazing up at the clear blue sky. It's like World of freaking Warcraft or something, where you have orcs and elves together having kids that date human hybrids with troll parents. Or it's just mad scientist mixing gone out of control. I don't get... I understand that the fun parts fit and fit pretty damn well, but that can't just be it. Can it?

She thought about picking up the delivery of cakes from Sugarcube Corner. She slid up in the bench, preparing to get back up, but she spotted a sign at the jewelry store besides her. 'Half-Off Sale Today'? 'This Friday Only'? That's the last freakin' place I'd expect to see go out of business.

She stood up, and she felt a light-bulb going off inside her mind. This Friday... She clapped her hands together. Oh, what an idiot I've been! Pinkie, Lulu, the special meeting with Twilight, and all that-- it's all tomorrow! She glanced around at the gaggles of ponies flowing across the street as she idly stepped forwards. And does that mean I have the whole afternoon with nothing to do? Dammit!

"Excuse m-me, ma'am."

Daylight's eyes flipped around. "Huh?"

"M-may I s-speak w-with you?"

She made a hundred-and-eighty-degree turn and faced the bench where she had just sat. An adorable looking cream-colored colt with a soft, curly face and fluffy brown hair soaked in sweat-- nervousness just dripping off of every inch of him-- looked right at her. She shifted a little back, taking in his big, loving eyes. Well... this guy is new.

"Oh, you can say whatever you want," she replied, smirking as she put her hands against her shoulders.

"I... I... uh... I w-was j-just walking around here..." he muttered, trying not to gaze right at her for too long with his head shifting around. "I mean, I w-was going around... I w-was g-going by the jewelry store... and..." He took a big gulp, trying to straighten his quaking hooves. "I was wondering if I could ask you something." He put a lot of determination and resolve into that last sentence, locking his bottom hooves together.

"Join the club," Daylight sarcastically remarked, folding her arms. She saw the colt look totally confused, and she immediately went on. "No, it's fine. What is it?"

"Could we maybe get a bite to eat?" he asked, looking right up to her with his head lined up alongside her jeans shorts. She looked back down at him, and she suddenly felt a wave of calmness, some kind of smoothness, coming over her. "You and I?" He made a hopeful smile. "Together?"

Oh! Holy cheese and crackers! I'm being propositioned! She felt like pumping a fist into the air in success. She opened her mouth, pausing to find the right words. Dozens of stray thoughts fought each other deep in her subconscious. The colt, still totally shaken from even the mere idea of talking to a girl like her, waited with baited breath.

I give him a D in confidence, a C in style, an A in politeness, and an A+ in sheer flippin' adorableness. Daylight's eyes moved from his little brown hair tuft on the back of his head to his comically huge saddlebag and finally over to the freckles beneath his enormous eyes. Oh, come on! She had a knack for making snap decisions with barely any thought other than instinct-- for better or for worse. It came as natural as breathing. That all averages out to a B, doesn't it?

"Sure!" Daylight smiled as she leaned down, coming inches from the colt's face. She put her hands on her knees.

"What?" Featherweight asked back. He seemed to blush a variety of different colors, clearly not understanding.

"Let's go right now! Why wait?" She picked up one of his front hooves with both hands. He seemed as limp as an old jellyfish on a beach. She saw him sweating even more, his mind spinning abou behind his huge brown eyes.

"S-sure," he meekly commented. He blinked again and again rapidly. Daylight stood up straight, letting go of his hooves. He gazed at them in the air, clearly hardly believing that he had actually just touched her.

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Oh my gosh! Oh my gosh! Oh my gosssssssssh! Featherweight's heart beat almost out of control as she walked side by side with the creature of his dreams. The tall, slender, alien girl-- her light, soft exotic flesh matching her exotic features from her huge exotic chest to her exotic flowing, bright red hair-- seemed more like something from one of those late night shows that his mom wouldn't let him watch than anything real.

And yet there he stood, with some kind of sharp raspberry-ish perfume rubbed off of her smooth skin upon his hooves. A real sexy alien enchantress! Sexy feminine alien with alien breasts in that weird place from an alien planet, her anti-magic powers arising from her alien sun! Oh, Celestia! Her body posed right above him as he stepped. He could hardly manage to keep it all together.

But he had to. I can do this. I can do this. I'm not me. He glanced down at his reflection in a nearby puddle, seeing a face without the acne standing several inches taller and wider looking back at him. I will do this!

"Let's go to Lulu's," Daylight said.

"Right."

She put a hand to her chin, thinking some more. "Oh, forget that. It's too formal."

"Right."

"Granted, that's silly to say, a family place like that being 'formal'. But I feel like I don't want something middle-brow, or however you say it in Equestria."

"Right."

"How about we head to Chucky's Diner? More relaxed, more smooth. We can just watch the birds in the pond."

"Right."

She stopped. She held her hands against her head, and she laughed heartily. "You know!" She locked eyes with the painfully nervous colt. "Just because we're on a date doesn't mean that you have to agree with everything I say."

He took a gulp. "Right..."

She pretended to slug him, letting out a torrent of giggles. He slid down to the ground, not understanding things at all. She pulled her head back, waving her long hair in the wind for a moment as she recomposed herself. He swooned, just drinking in her big smile with her lips looking as red as cherry ice cream.

"A little anxious, aren't we? I don't think you ever even gave me your name, sweetie pie," she remarked as she turned to the left, heading over to Chucky's place.

"Featherweight," he replied, not even thinking. He stopped, and he ran a hoof against his face. No! You dummy! "Uh, I usually go by 'Middleweight', especially since I got out of school and got my job and everything. Featherweight is what they called me as a foal." He nodded for emphasis, his thick hair going over his eyes.

"Daylight," she said, making a mock salute, "at your service. Also known as 'Melissa Michelle Barone' back on, uh, my home planet." She chuckled at those last few words, reaching out her hands far above her head with her fingers intertwined. "Oh, God, I'll never get tired of being able to refer to 'back in my planet' or 'over at my planet' or 'things in my planet' or whatever. It's so, like, surreal."

"Happy to see you again, Daylight," he commented. He avoided face-hoofing again, but he felt a black sinking feeling bubble up inside of them. Ugh! Again! Remember-- she's not supposed to know that you'd been gazing at her from afar for like weeks! If she knew, she'd be all creeped out! Think, you idiot!

"I like it, eh," she said, not paying attention to his words. "Melissa Michelle Barone sounds like the name of a former Republican House Speaker appointed Secretary of the Treasury or something. It just reeks corporate-y things. All I need is a suit and then I'm ready to evict some homeless tribes from their homes to build an oil drill or something." She blew a raspberry.

Featherweight started to say 'Right', but he caught himself just in time. He blinked, scrunching his face up, and he went with, "Okay."

"Here we are, Middleweight," she said, stepping up over onto a small green platform besides the diner. The actual building looked more like a big rectangular gray block from a giant's toy set than anything with ponies inside of it. "Oh, hey!" She slapped herself on the thigh. "You wouldn't mind it-- weird question, but stay with me-- I call you M.W.?"

"Uhh..." He stepped right in front of the window to order, looking out at the empty wooden benches around them and then out at the sparkly blue lake.

"It's a silly reference to this Newgrounds animation thing," she went on, "you look a lot like the one character. He's this, like, chipmunk. But he's a heavy metal guitarist. But the racist chipmunk hating rabbits try to drive him out of down, and then you have to like-- click, click, click, click!" She rattled her fingers against the building's wall. "Real fast. And then there's the racing section where M.W.'s new Mustang is chased by the squirrel police motorcycles all Steve McQueen style." She pretended to steer a wheel. "Then! He grabs his Les Paul to like comb--" She stopped, seeing how he was blankly staring at her with mouth open. "Oh, uh, whatever." She scratched her head.

Pay attention to what she's saying! No matter whatever it is! I'm sure that Newgrounds is a very important nation-state back on her planet, maybe with like a giant army with of chipmunks ravaging her own home country! "M.W. it is!" Featherweight said, sliding a hoof in the air as if checking off an imaginary box.

"Yo, Chucky!" She yelled into the half-open window, with nothing visible but a register, a tip jar, and stacks of various ingredients up on the wall.

"Yo, Daylight!" a husky, deep voice yelled back from deep inside the building.

"We want a fried cheese and egg sandwich with the melted cheddar dripping onto the little fried curly potato bits in there. Regular corn sticks on the side. Large iced tea." She leaned up against the wall and tapped her leg up and down.

"As you wish, your most exalted majesty," replied the voice. A couple pans clanged about from out of sight.

She slapped the windowsill, curling up her eyebrows and making mock-indignation. "And it'd damn well be sweet iced tea. Damn sweet. Like pixies snorting cocaine off of a lollipop sweet!"

They just heard a loud grunt in response.

"Oh, hey, M.W. baby, what do you want?" she asked, her head flipping over towards him.

He coughed nervously. He took a little breath, and he answered, "I usually just eat what my mom gets whe--" He stopped mid-sentence. He looked down, clearly wanting to smash his face upon the concrete in sheer embarrassment. "Uh, what I meant to say was, uh..." He brushed a hoof through his thick brown mane. "I like that stuff too." He smiled a very awkward smile, his curly freckled cheeks turning red.

"Yo, chucky!" Daylight hollered once again. "Whatever the hell I just said-- make two of that!"

Just like before, they simply heard a loud grunt in response. Daylight smiled, and she plopped herself along half of the long reddish-brown bench closest to the lake. She reached over and dragged closer the nearby table. She looked back, waving him over. He cautiously sat at the other end of the bench, trying not to get too physical too soon and seem imposing.

She gazed at the two bright white ducks flopping out across the water, and she made a happy sigh. She glanced back at 'M.W.', and she pulled an arm over the back of the bench. "You're paying, right?"

His face seemed to melt, his hooves clattering together. He shifted his saddlebag onto his chest. "Oh, I've got-- I've brought some-- I just-- I wasn't sure--"

"Oh, M.W.," she remarked, leaning her head back and giggling. "This is like the cheapest place in all of Ponyville. You're safe. And, by the way--" She suddenly leaned over and poked him on the shoulder. "If I was all about the money, then I'd have asked Twilight to transfer me over to Coltsville and have me turn tricks on Squarg Street for horny little dragons. That's not me."

Featherweight made a sharp, embarrassingly feminine squeal at her poke. That just seemed to amuse her even more, Daylight almost biting her lip to keep from laughing. He brushed up his body a few inches closer, and they both looked out at the lake. A dozen of ducks ventured over to patch of mossy rocks nearby from the far end of the water.

He looked over at her left hand, now resting against the wooden plank only a few inches from his right hoof, and he tried to focus. Her fingers rubbed idly against the wood for a moment. He watched the ducks once again, coughing nervously, and he slid over. Her fingers brushed up against his fur, feeling as wonderful as always. Praise Celestia! I'm doing it! I'm breaking through to her heart! He made a huge smile.

"So, M.W., tell me about yourself," she said, still looking out at the ducks. "What's like life? You've always lived here?"

"Ponyville is in my blood," he replied. He shivered a little, feeling pulses of pleasure, as she curled her fingers around his hoof. Focus, now. It's time for smooth talk. Girls love the smooth talk. All you need is to relax, be smart, and be perceptive. "My family's been here. I grew up here. I went to school here." Technically not a lie since I'm still going to school here but I did used to too!

"Interesting, staying in one place a lot," she said, "I always moved around. Didn't have a choice, with my parents' jobs. Still really attached to the Windy City, though. I guess it just happened to be that crucial period of my life, between being a kid and really being mature, and I saw the downtown as like a playground." He saw memories flashing back behind her eyes, her face looking really reflective and almost wistful.

"Yeah, it's good to have dreams." He slid even closer, his bottom hooves lining up besides her legs. Her fingers moved up his hooves over to his shoulder, resting against his body. He felt just so connected. "Past and present. My dream has always been to move to Canterlot and work for The Canterlot Times. Not just to pick up scoops, but to be responsible and really try to get involved in the details of all the issues. Knowledge for knowledge's own sake, right?" He stopped. Don't drone on. Don't focus too much on yourself, but keep the conversation going. It's like tossing around a ball-- go back and forth. And the goal is to get each other so familiar. Remember what your father said! Girls love nothing more than the sound of their own voices!

"Sounds cool," she commented. She took a deep breath.

"So, uh, Daylight," Featherweight said. He ran a hoof idly against his chest. "Tell me about your home planet."

"Home planet," she repeated, giggling.

"It sounds fascinating," he said, turning around and facing her directly. "So, you used to live in a floating cloud-city of wind where there are these nasty rabbit things known as 'Republicans' that try to stop people and animals from drilling for 'heavy metal' by siccing the 'squirrel police' on them." He stroked his chin, lowered his eyebrows, and otherwise tried to look intellectual. "Very fascinating."

To Be Continued...