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My name is Fanged Doom, and my life sucks. You'd think that my life would be great--I'm an alicorn and shit--but it's not. I was supposed to be a powerful ruler of some sort, dominate Equestria, and have everypony bowing down to me. But noooooo, that Celestia-damned plant had to mess everything up. All I wanted to do was to find something to eat before entering the domain of my sisters, but apparently that was too much to ask for.

My stomach grumbled louder than if an earthquake had shaken the ground, and I groaned in defeat.

I couldn't ignore my hunger anymore lest I starve to death. Walking thousands of miles through deserts, swamps, and taigas had finally begun to take its toll on me.

Another stomach growled behind me, reminding me that I was not the only one suffering.

"I would kill for some gems right now. Or maybe some eggs... hell, I'd eat a sofa right now. I don't care at this point," the owner of the stomach complained.

"Be quiet, Shadow," I scolded her. I didn't need to hear her whining.

"Whatever. We're in a forest. Can't we just find food? I'm sure there's lots of plants and shit to eat," she pointed out.

I stopped dead in my tracks, realising the truth in what she'd just said. There was most certainly a plethora of wildlife in the Everfree. "Yeah, I knew that," I lied. No way was I going to admit a retarded dragon could possibly have thought of something before me.

Shadow shrugged and used her tongue to polish a dirty scale on her neck. "Right. So, food first, then taking over the world?"

"Yeah, sounds about right." I stopped to inspect a mushroom of some sort growing at the base of a tree. "Can you eat this for me? I want to know if it's edible or not."

"Boss, you know I'd do almost anything for you, but eating poison 'shrooms is not one of those things." Shadow shuddered and stuck her nose up in the air in refusal. "Besides, there's plenty of other things that aren't potentially deadly, like those flowers over there."

"Flowers?" I turned my head to see the flowers in question, and was pleased with the site that was before my eyes. Although the tall trees and vines blocked out the majority of the sunlight, the few rays sneaking through the leaves were just enough to illuminate the area and reveal a patch of rather delicious-looking flowers. Their azure petals appeared to be healthy and flavourful, unlike the other half-dead plants found in the forest. "Yes, flowers would be a good idea."

"Yeah, like I said," Shadow laughed. "I don't eat icky plants like that, though. You should know this by now. Can I go hunting or something?"

I waved a hoof, dismissing the hungry dragon to run off and catch her own food. Honestly, I couldn't care less about what she did, so long as she always returned to aid me in my mission to conquer this land. Besides, all the more flowers for me, right?

I walked over to the delectable plants, taking care not to trip over any roots or large rocks. An injured hoof was the last thing I needed right now. Usually I'd fly when the ground was as uneven as this, but I feared that my fragile wings would tear in the unpredictable weather of the wild forest.

I felt something squishy underneath my hoof, and stepped back to realise that I'd reached the flowers. Grinning in anticipation, I knelt down and devoured the food greedily, satisfying my crying stomach. Never before had a meal tasted so great.

I ate until I could eat no more, then I lay on the ground, knackered. Walking had taken a lot out of me and I needed to rest. Yawning, I stretched out my limbs, listening to the satisfying pops of my joints. Before I knew it, I was asleep.

I woke up to Celestia's great fiery ball of fire burning through my eyelids. That, and Shadow was drooling her sticky dragon saliva on my hooves.

"What the hell, Shadow?" I hissed, whacking her cheek to wake her up. "That's disgusting!"

"Huh?" Shadow stirred, slowly prying open her crusted-shut eyelids. “Oh, oops.” She wiped the drool from her chin and slithered away from me.