Engines of a revolution

I woke up with my head pounding and my vision blurry. I could’nt remember a thing about last night, except for flashing lights and pounding bass. ‘That answers the question of whether I made it to the concert or not’ I thought. Shutting my eyes to try and block out the light in an attempt to ease the headache. I tried to sit up, only to have myself pulled back down by something furry. My eyes shot open and I blinked through the blurriness until my eyes focused and I found myself face to face with a certain white-coated pony.

“Oh…shit” I whispered. ‘I must have really been shitfaced out of my mind if I…oh fuck’ The realisation hit me and I practically leapt out of bed before smacking my head on the wall, I clutched my head in pain before letting out a hiss, as if the hangover wasn’t bad enough “Ah! Fuck!”

“Huh?” I heard Vinyl say “Oh, are you OK?”

“Please tell me we not…you-know-what” I barely managed to say. After a few moments I heard her chuckle

“If you were able to do that to me through those” She said “then I’d be seriously impressed” I looked up to see Vinyl with a bemused expression on her face, I then looked down to see I still had my underwear on. I let out a sigh of relief.

“Thank fuck!” I said in my own language, Vinyl must have sensed the relief in my voice.

“What, you gotta a problem with ponies?” she asked.

“No…I just” I stumbled for words “Not ready” Vinyl oh’d in understanding.

“Are other species not common where you’re from?” She asked, climbing out of my bed. I shook my head.

“no other people” I said “Humans…all there is” Vinyl raised an eyebrow.

“Hmm, must be boring on your world” she said, stretching out before trotting to the doorway “On this world there is more than enough variety to choose from”

“What do you mean?” I asked.

“Ask me again after half an hour” she said, before walking into the bath room, within a few seconds I could hear the shower running.

“I guess they have showers too” I thought aloud, before standing up and getting myself dressed, I was still curious as to what went on last night to cause Vinyl, a pony I’d only just met, to stay the night. Unfortunaly my headache made it almost impossible to think clearly. Once dressed I made my way downstairs to find Sam still asleep on the Sofa, I shook my head in amusement before making my way to the kitchen, I got the biggest mug I could find before setting about making the strongest cup of tea I could. Once that was done and I’d had a few sips I walked over to the sound bar mounted on the wall and turned it on before getting out my phone and activating the Bluetooth. I made sure the volume wasn’t too loud before playing some of my favourite songs and setting about making breakfast, I’d have to wait for Vinyl to come downstairs before asking what she wanted. I looked in the Fridge and sighed, stocks were running low and I’d have to get food soon.

“Let’s hope the local ponies don’t react…like last time” I could still remember the time those ponies broke into my house because they thought their friend was in danger, I still hadn’t gotten around to thanking Twilight for repairing the door. I shook my head to clear my thoughts before getting what food remained out of the fridge and setting to work. Whilst I was no Gordon Ramsey, I still prided myself in knowing how to cook. With what I had, I could make a couple of simple omelettes, though I’d have to go into Ponyville to get more food today. I’d just poured my own omelette into the pan when I noticed Vinyl walking into the kitchen.

“Awake now?” I asked.

“You mean I wasn’t after you launched yourself out of bed?” she asked.

“Fair point” I said “that is something I’m wondering, how did you end up in my bed?” she staired at the chairs around the kitchen table before sitting in one.

“I live with another pony” she said “it was late by the time we got back, so you offered to let me stay the night so as to avoid disturbing my friend”

“Fair enough” I said “though sober me would never even think of asking that, I’m just too…shy I guess” Vinyl raised an eyebrow, but didn’t press any further.

“Tell me, have you ever had Omelette?” I asked.

“Huh?” she asked “that another thing from your world?”

“I’ll take that as a no” I said, I then held up the different ingredients. “you willing to give it a try?” she thought for a moment before giving a shrug.

“Eh, sure”.

“Right, you said earlier that there was ‘variety’ to choose from” I said “care to explain?”

“Ponies aren’t the only species that talks” she said “You’ve got Griffins, Hippogriffs, Dragons. That’s just the ones I can think of, there are hundreds of different species” I gave a low whistle.

“Plenty of fish in the sea” I muttered in English.

“Huh?” she asked. I translated the saying and she scrunched up her nose “what kind of saying is that!?”

“A human saying” I said, “it means plenty of options to choose from”

“I’ll have to remember it” she said, at that moment a couple of scrolls, a folded sheep of paper and a small bag thudding onto the table, followed shortly after by another flash and a large bag of gold fudding onto the table.

“The fuck!?” I exclaimed in my own language, before picking up the letter.

This letter has been enchanted with a spell that allows you to see it as if it were written in your own language so as to ease in your understanding of this scroll.

Dear Luke Washington

I have contacted the management of Equestrian National Railways and their chief mechanical engineer is willing to meet with you to discuss your proposition. Her letter to you is attached.

I realise that you have no money in which to buy food, so I have sent you a bag of bits so that you may sustain yourself on essentials until you have a job. I have also attached a card that will let you travel from Ponyville to Canterlot free of charge, but this is only valid for a daily return ticket so use it wisely.

I have also managed to enchant a necklace with a spell similar to the telepathy spell we use so that you can communicate easier when you need to. But use it wisely, it only has a limited charge and takes time to recharge.

Another thing I felt I should mention is that due to you being the only known member of your species, you will have a place on one of my councils made up of various species

I expect we will meet again soon, so i look forward to our next meeting.

Sincerely, Princess Celestia

P.S. I have attached a vial that will allow you to send letters to me

I picked up the second letter and continued reading

Dear Luke Washington

Princess Celestia tells me that you are willing to share your world’s technology in the interest of furthering our own railway system. I would be delighted to meet with you to further discuss this proposition. Meet me at Canterlot’s Draconica works with plenty of photographic examples of locomotives and rolling stock from your country.

From how Celestia described you, you seem to have a rather passionate interest in Railways, so I have included a map of the Equestrian Transport Network for you.

Sincerely, Emerald Nights, CME of the Equestrian National Railway.

“[well, looks like my travel problems are sorted]” I said in English, examining the metal card attached to the back of the scroll before going back to cooking.

“that’s a lot of money” Vinyl said, giving a low whistle.

“how much are we talking about?” I asked.

“You’ll be able to get enough food for a decent meal with about 5 bits” she said, she opened the bag and her eyes widened “this is well past a couple hundred bits”

“So in short…”

“You’re loaded” she said, smirking “you lucky [freka]!”

“What’s that word mean?” I asked.

“It’s another word or when to ponies…” she paused “you know, do the thing you were afraid that we’d done. But there’s two ways of saying it, there’s [frek], that can be used as an exclamation, then there’s [freka] which is used to refer to somepony”

“Oh! We say [fuck], or [fucker]” I said, Vinyl giggled.

“Got any other swears in your language?” she asked. I thought for a moment.

“A great guy once said that the major dirty words are [Shit, piss, fuck, cunt, cocksucker, motherfucker, tits, fart, turd and twat]” I said, Vinyl snorted and I chuckled, soon Breakfast was ready and as soon as that was done Vinyl bid me farewell and left for her own house. I then put the all the dishes to one side and wrote a letter to Celestia to forward to Emerald Nights before sending it off. Then I began collecting research and photographic evidence of all my country's most notable designs of the steam era, as well as transferring some videos to my laptop, which would greatly help with providing evidence once I actually got there. About an hour later I had everything I needed, so I packed everything into my rucksack and set out for the station with Sam by my side.

The journey there was uneventful, if slightly more populated than the last few times I’d travelled. I’d have to pick up some food on the way back home, just enough to sustain me until I travelled back out for a proper shopping trip. After the usual journey time we reached Canterlot and I quickly made my way outside in order to find a royal guard. I thought now would be the best time to test out the necklace and I put it on, suddenly the countless conversations going on around me were much more understandable. I spotted a royal guard on patrol and made my way over.

“Excuse me” I called, the guard stopped and looked at me, his eyes widening briefly before he regained his stoic composure.

“How may I be of assistance?” the guard asked.

“I was wondering if you could direct me to Canterlot’s Draconia works” the guard pointed down a side road near to the station.

“Go down there until you come to a big workshop” he said “you can’t miss it” I nodded in thanks before making my way towards the side road and following it down. Quickly the road reached an industrial district with tramways snaking their way across the road between buildings, occasionally I had to stop to let a diminutive engine wheeze past with a string of wagons. The workshops came into view and I was just about to make my way over to them when a shrill whistle pierced the air and I turned to see a tank engine charging towards me. I grabbed Sam and leapt back just as it screeched past before sliding to a halt.

“Theur need ta watch wheear you’re gonneur!” the driver called, I looked over and internally groaned, it was the engine driver from before, she jumped down, revealing herself to be a pegasus

“I’m sorry” I said “These engines are quieter than you’d think

“Whateva” she said “Next tahhm ah sithee not payin attention ah won’t gi' warnin!” she then flew back into the cab and blasted on the whistle before charging off. Once she was gone, I let out a sigh of relief.

“That was too close” I muttered, before making my way towards the workshop. Once inside I was in awe at the sheer size of the place, I had to once again pull Sam out of the way as other works loco clanked past.

“I see you’ve made it” I heard a female voice call over the noise of the workshop, I turned to see a dark green Unicorn with brown mane and tale trotting over, I was initially taken back by how comparatively young she seemed to be.

“I take it you are Emerald Nights” I said.

“Indeed” she said “shall we take this some place quieter?” I nodded.

“Lead the way” I said, gesturing for her to go on, eventually we made our way to a large office overlooking the workshop. The room was nicely furnished, but obviously built more for work than relaxing, the end overlooking the workshop was made of glass, creating an observation area of sorts, in front of the observation area was a large, low to the ground desk and a swivelling stool of some sort between the desk and the observation area, presumably so Emerald Nights could keep an eye on the work going on below. This side of the desk was a couple of cushions. On her way to the desk I noticed Emerald Night levitating a bottle of some sort of cream coloured liquid and a couple of whisky glass-sized tumblers.

“Come, sit” she said, gesturing to one of the cushions before sitting on the stool. I sat on the cushion and Sam curled up nearby

“I must admit” I said “I was initially taken about by how young you look”

“Oh!” she asked, pouring the drink into each glass “and how young do you think I am?” her tone wasn’t one of indignation or offence, merely curiosity.

“Mid-twenties” I said “early-thirties at a push” she smiled

“You are surprisingly perceptive for someone from another world-if what Celestia told me is to be believed-though I have to ask, why were you surprised?” she levitated one of the glasses over to me and I took a sip, noting with some surprise that it was comparable to baileys.

“All of the locomotive designers back on my world were in their mid-40s to 50s when they started” I said, putting the glass down and getting my laptop out of the bag before starting it up. Once the desktop was loaded up I went into a folder that I’d crated for today and turned the laptop to her “Should the principles of my world’s designers be implemented successfully, you can hope to see performance matching or exceeding those shown in this recording” I then clicked one of the video files and the screen went black. birdsong started to filter out of the speakers before the screen faded to a view of a railway line with overhead wires.

Youtube Video

“Remarkable” Emerald Nights gasped.

“It won’t happen overnight” I said “But I do have plans that should ease the railways into a new age of speed, comfort and safety” she thought for a moment before answering.

“I’m listening” she said.

“I have a plan that involves standardisation” I said

“Standersisation?” she asked.

“It’s where all locomotives share certain common components” I said “so locomotives of a certain size would share the same boiler, cylinders and cab for instance. It means manufacturing new classes of locomotives will be cheaper as you can simply draw upon an inventory of pre-exiting parts”

“Make sense” she said, nodding in thought

“Pre-existing classes will be rebuilt with these standard components” I said “so they can keep the railways running whilst the brand new locomotives are being designed and built”

“So the established locomotives would still have a use” she said, I tipped my glass slightly in acknowledgement.

“Locomotives would also be reclassified and re-numbered” I continued “this means that locomotives of a certain type will have an allocated number series, it would also ease in identification of a class”

“What would this reclassification entail?” she asked. I brought up another document.

“All locomotives classes that share the same wheel arraignment will be assigned a letter” I explained “so let’s say a locomotive with just 4 driving wheels would be classified as ‘A’, an individual class of locomotives would have its own number so as to distinguish classes within a wheel arrangement, for example ‘A1’ would be the earliest class of four wheeler you have”

“That makes a lot of sense” she said “did you come up with this yourself?”

“No” I said, taking a sip of my drink “the ordering is based on a pre-existing system from an old railway back home, but I’ve refined and improved it, the same goes for the numbering system” Emerald nodded

“What exactly would these locomotives look like?” she asked, I brought up a picture of a large green locomotive.

“A primary express locomotive would look something like this, but adapted to your track gauge and clearances with a few stylistic liberties taken” I said, before pausing “Out of curiosity, what is the track gauge used here?”

Six hooves wide” Emerald said, pointing to a six foot long measuring stick hung on the wall “it was done that way originally so that if anypony were to fall onto the track there would be less chance of being struck by the wheels, what is it back home?”

“4 hooves, 8 & ½ inches” I said, converting what I’d figured out myself. Emerald snorted.

“That’s oddly specific” she said.

“It was used in mines originally” I said “Unfortunately it was too far spread by the time a larger, 7 hoof gauge was developed”

“So you were stuck with a narrow gauge”

“By your standards, yes” I said “So, what do you think to my proposal?” Emerald turned towards the workshop and stared out for a few moments.

“It won’t be easy” she said “not to mention that the management are stubborn…but, the long term benefits more than outweigh the shortcomings”

“Thank you” I said.

“soon” Emerald said “Everyone will be thanking you”

“What do you mean?” I asked, not quite following

“well you are going to help with the design process” she said “aren’t you?”

“Of course” I said “it’s just that you are the chief mechanical engineer”

“Yes” she said “and as of now, you are my apprentice” I was taken aback

"But what about the management?" I asked. she stood up and put her forehooves on the table, she had a smirk and an odd glimmer in her eye, like she had a shit-ton of ideas and one big plan

"Just let them try and stop me"