"The subject has awoken," was the first thing I heard. How did they know I was awake when I didn't? And who were they? "He has increased brain activity," seems they know I'm a guy. "It shows he is thinking," Where the hell am I? I try to open my eyes.

"Fuck!" WHY is it so damn bright in here? It's like my eyes are made of liquid nitrogen and someone placed thermite in the sockets. And wait how can I talk, I haven't been able to coherently since I got to this hellhole.

"Seems he has the same profanity," they say. Fuck you too. I swear if I want to.

"Where... am I?" I ask.

"In a location you will learn of soon," A voice that sounds awesomely synthesized says. "We need to be sure we can trust you." I'm sure I recognize that voice.

"Can you tone down the lights?" I hated how bright it was. "It sucks that I can't open my eyes without pain."

"It's pitch black in there,"

"Bullshit!" I mean... just... no. It can't be. "Prove it," It's not like I can see thermal.

"First open your right eye," I did so, the bright lights of doom were back. "Next we will put a nullifier around the room," the lights started to dim then turn black. "Finally, we will turn the lights on," the lights slowly came on. They were different than the previous ones.

"So what does it nullify?" I hope magic, it would be awesome.

"Magic," fuck yeah, but wait, I didn't have it before.

"I didn't have it before," I'mma kill a bitch.

"No." calm down me.

" Would you like to explain how I got this augmentation?" I like the ability but I want to know why I have it. "Or why it looks like I'm in a scientific experimentation room?"

"We gave it to you," I heard a smack over the intercom-like thing.

"I would have used more tact," the shifting voice said. "I am sorry."

"May I know the name?" I doubt it.

"Phoenix," well, shit. The second human in Equestria.

"You can't know mine until later," I know you buggy. Don't try to lie.

"Are you sure, Chrysalis?" struggle buggy, deal yourself damage, haha.

"..." You could hear the parenthesis. "I told you Chrysalis, your voice is too recognizable," another smack.

"He didn't know that for sure you hairless ape." That's rude. I don't like it when people are rude.

"I take offense to that" don't insult your asset.

"I was going to go over a list of the other augmentations but would you like to discuss insults instead?" Chrysalis said. You fucking bitch.

"No thank you," Fucking cunt "I would like to hear the list," it would be nice to know.

"We increased your arm strength with samples taken from Big Macintosh," interesting. "We gave you wings and reflexes spun from the rainbow one, They can break the barrier but they harm you quite a bit," wait, the sound barrier? Well, shit. That's nice. "We upgraded your legs with samples from the orange one so you can run faster than most creatures, including herself," Nice. "If you use the wings while running you can break the barrier, though a bit slower, with a bigger max speed," wait, what the fuck? I'm faster on the ground than on my wings? I guess that's only if there's no obstacles. If it's not a straight shot the wings are better. I wanna do an aileron(BARREL!) roll. "We increased your mental capacity so you can think faster than anyone except Celestia or Discord and do what you just did. We gave you the dragons' ability to see magic," no shit Sherlock. "it works better than thermal vision," No. Way. Can someone pick up that phone, cuz I called it. "We gave you the changeling's ability to siphon love but upgraded it so you can drain magic with samples from Tirek," wait, what the fuck again? That massive centaur? "It comes with a natural drawback, if you drain a lot, you get bigger, if you get too big you die in a massive explosion," are you fucking kidding me? " We think at max you can get to the power of Discord before popping, but it is a combination of both. You drain from the pool, you don't take the pool like Tirek, you can also passively drain from the environment," that's better. "You also get the power of a strong unicorn in your left hand" oh shit. Playing field=Leveled. This would of saved me years ago. "That should wrap it up."

"How long did this take you to prepare for?" I thought out loud. "Jesus."

"Since you came here," she said. "We saw great potential in you."

"Could you possibly remove the magic nullifier?" please be stupid please be stupid please be stupid. "It would help for me to get used to the Death Beams of Pain™"

"The magic here is much greater than that in Equestria, nice try though," Fuck. "Feel free to relax for now," Phoenix said. Bitch!

As I fell asleep all I could remember is Chrysalis saying "All will be explained."

In a nearby room, some scientists were working, ripping chameleons apart to see how they work. In another room, humans were forced to sprint for as long as possible to test endurance. Some creatures were testing out different food sources. In one room the possibilities of dragonfire were being tested. A select team of scientists were creating a new anesthetic that could transport people to different places in blind children's forms. Finally, a great mind older than Celestia herself was teaching a forbidden type of magic.

A group of mages examined an ancient artifact and thought on it's possibilities.

A message was sent to an important person but wasn't noticed until it was too late. I̪̺̦̺̟̟ͬ̃ͣ̓̿ͦ͜͠t͇̤̖͗̇̓ ̗͍̲̖̃̈́̚͟͟h̓̓ͣ̋͏̧̻̖̜͙̺̭̖͓ą̵͎̏̀s̷̸̟̞ͧ̄̅̄̄̽̍͑ͭ́ ̴̡̮̱̼̓̇͊̿͂̽͌b̶̼̙̟͈ͣ͛̈͝͞è̴̼̼̘̟̝͑́͑̆g͖̪͎͙͔͙̭̋͞u̽̒ͮ̀̿̓̈́͋̄͏҉͏͉̞̟͉n̸̳͎ͦ̈ͭ̇̚͘͡.̟͕̲̱̭͆͢͡

Author's Note

I hope you like the story. If you did, please tell friends. I worked hard on this. Enjoy! Small details kick my ass. Hopefully soon I'll get an editor or prereader or detail crammer or something.

Hints: There's lot of them in there... EQN signing out