I Don't Speak Pet

by markhaox14

Rating: everyone
Tags: Other, Comedy, Gummy, Random, Main 6, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 5386

Mind reading? Cool! Communicating with animals? Super cool! Trying to mind read and communicate with Gummy? Well... Twilight tries it. But will she enjoy what he's trying to communicate?

While trying to explain Pinkie Pie's... well... Pinkie Sense, Twilight hadn't realized she had invented a mind reading device! After months of sitting decommissioned, Twilight finally finds it while picking through her library's old artifacts. Immediately, she wonders what wonderful things she could use it for! Or... what saucy gossip she can discover with it! But she can't try it on a pony first, she thinks. It'd be too suspicious. So she tries another subject first... and the results are quite the opposite of what she thinks!

Published 2015-06-15 03:20:02 UTC
Last updated 2015-07-15 10:25:54 UTC

My Pinkie Sense is Tingling.

"Do I have to?"

"Yes, Spike! Pinkie said it herself; her tail was twitching! Do you know what it feels like to have a frog, a flower pot, an anvil, a cart, a piano... and another flower pot land on you!?"

"Uh... no..."

"Exactly! So please stop asking me and look for a helmet, quickly!" After a few seconds of shouting, I quickly calmed myself. A Princess should never be so... uncouth. Or grouchy. Besides, what little remained from the library, Spike moved here. I had no clue where anything that survived from it was.

I saw him nod, and run off to another room. I slumped in my seat, groaning a bit. The girls looked at me, Rainbow chuckling. Typical. "Wow, Twilight... I've never seen you freak out that much before. Especially when Pinkie's tail shakes!"

I turned to her, more than a little annoyed. "Aside from me and Rarity..."

"None of you have ever been attacked by objects hitting your head!" She finished. I could tell Dashie somehow irritated her with that statement too, and I understood why. Other than me, she was the only other pony that fell victim to Pinkie's tail twitches when a vine from the Everfree Forest knocked her out in my old library. It... wasn't pretty.

"They're both right! When my tail twitches, you better take cover! Let's see, it's been..." She checked her right hoof, as if she had a watch. For all I knew, she probably had a mental watch and just acted like she had one on her hoof. "Ten seconds three milliseconds and five nanoseconds since my tail twitched so I hope Spike hurries and finds something for you Twilight!" I hope so too... I didn't want to go to the hospital again and explain to Dr. Horse that I yet again suffered head trauma at the hooves of the Pinkie Sense.

I heard the door to the main chamber open, and I sighed in relief as I saw Spike carrying... wait! That helmet! That was the helmet I used to try and explain Pinkie's... well... Pinkie Sense! I can't believe that old thing survived the library's destruction! "This was the best thing I could find, Twilight. I saw an umbrella hat too but... come on, what good will that do?" Indeed, what good could it do? We weren't living in some fantasy cartoon.

He walked up to me, handing me the helmet. Well... this would have to do. I grasped it in my hooves, a smile crossing Pinkie's face as I did. The other girls simply looked at the helmet in complete confusion. "Uh... what exactly is that there... doohickey?"

Typical Applejack... depreciating the complicated nature... of science! "This... doohickey... is a scanner. A neuroelectrical scanner, to be more precise. I could be even more precise, but at that point, I'd... probably lose you guys. What it did was read the brainwaves of a subject... this case, Pinkie Pie, and detect any sudden changes in electrical pulses distributed throughout the brain and spinal cord!" I smiled as I explained... I always loved explaining technology and science to my friends!

Well... they obviously didn't love it as much as I did. They all stared at me as if I were speaking gibberish... which I must have been to them. Man... I would've loved it if sometimes I could share my ideas with them and actually have a conversation with them regarding theories, principles, hypotheses, and experiments. But... alas, I didn't know many ponies in Ponyville that were graduates of Celestia's School for Gifted Unicorns.

I placed the helmet on, strapping it tight against my head. After a moment, I heard a clang and a thud. I turned to the ground next to me, seeing a... wait... was that a cannon!? I heard Pinkie giggle soon after. "Oh, silly me! I forgot about my hidden confetti cannons!"

"You mean to tell me that you didn't remove those things like I asked!?" I interrogated in a mix of both shock and anger.

"I guess not! Whoopsie!" Whoopsie? Whoopsie!? You... you were supposed to remove those things, Pinkie! They're a hazard to everypony!

Fluttershy cleared her throat. "Um... I know they can be a hazard, Twilight... but... I kinda think they're a fun... albeit a bit scary... surprise."

I thought suffering another concussion was scary enough, but nothing could be scarier than confetti! Anything but that! I rolled my eyes just thinking about it... I saw Fluttershy droop her ears a bit after that, whimpering a bit. "Uh... Twilight..."

"Ugh, yes?" Wonder what Applejack was gonna say. Probably something to do with bucking every confetti cannon out of its hiding place.

"Uh... no. I wasn't going to suggest bucking every confetti cannon out of its hiding place..." she said, a bit annoyed. Wait... how did she... know I thought that...? "Maybe because you're thinking out loud, Twilight?"

Wait... thinking out loud? How? I was sure I wasn't talking. "No, but your helmet is!" Wait... my... helmet...? I felt my hide shake and quiver... oh dear Celestia... i-is it reading my thoughts!?

"Um... yes, dear. It is."

I rushed to unstrap the helmet from my head, and as soon as it was loosened, I took it off. I hoped they couldn't read my thoughts still but just to be sure... hey diddle diddle! The cat and the fiddle! Luna jumped over the moon! Celestia laughed! She saw such sport! And the dish ran away with the spoon! I turned to the others. "Did you get all that?"

"Uh... what?"

It worked! They couldn't hear my thoughts anymore! I inspected the helmet in my hooves... weird. How did it switch on? How was it still working after so long? And... how could it display my thoughts...? I thought it was a scanner! Unless...

"Spike, was this helmet on when you brought it?"

"No. I turned it on! I thought it would work better that way." Oh Spike... this isn't power armor!

"Hmm... when it was connected to the large system while I was trying to understand the Pinkie Sense, it only read her brainwaves... I suppose without the detection systems within, it... can read thoughts instead." I felt a smile cross my face. A huge... huge smile! Think of what I can do with this! "This... is... amazing! Oh, the research I could do with this! The projects! I could submit this to Celestia! And she'll love it! Love it!"

A thought came to me... I... sorta also wanted to use this for myself. See what others... well... thought. Thought about in their minds... ooh... the idea of it just made me shiver in excitement!

"Er... are you sure that's... wise... to keep around, Twilight?"

Oh... I forgot... this thing did intrude on our most private thoughts... surely, the girls wold be a little miffed if I went about and jotted down a pony's deepest... darkest secrets... I turned to them. "Hmm? Oh! Er..." Think fast, Twily... think fast... it's what you're good at... what can I say to keep this yet not worry the girls...? It came to me! "I meant with... our pets! Yes, our pets!

And with that, I was sold. The girls all smiled at that thought. "Oh, boy! I would love to know exactly what Angel thought of his tail styling! I mean, I can understand him, but I always want to be sure!"

"And when Tank wakes up from hibernation, I can finally know what he'd want to do, straight from him! Maybe a race like the one in the gorge!"

"Or Winona when she fetches! She sure loves to play fetch! And chase her tail. And... drink from the toilet... huh... I wanna ask her why she likes doin' all that..."

"I must ask Opalescence what she thinks of my wardrobe! And I simply must hear her input for new styles!"

"Ooh! Ooh! Ooh! And Gummy! I can't wait to hear Gummy too!" I tried my best to contain my laughter. But I couldn't resist... I laughed out loud! Oh wow! Gummy? Having thoughts!? No offense to Pinkie, but that gator was as dim as a firefly! "What's so funny, Twilight?"

Hmm... actually... Gummy could be a perfect first test run! He wouldn't think of much so he'd be perfect to convince the girls that this device wasn't that interesting! Which means more time for me to make more tests! "Heh... nothing, Pinkie. I guess I could test Gummy first!"

"Awesome! When do we set that up?"

I smiled a bit deviously. "Tomorrow, sunrise." I knew the other girls would be asleep by then, so it'd be perfect. How wonderful! I finally have something I can read minds with! Maybe I can go even further and communicate... have an actual conversation with Owlowicious! Sure, I'd have to endure a morning hearing little to nothing from Gummy, but after that, jackpot! Tomorrow is gonna be a good day!

Elementary.

Well... I woke up the next day after a very good night's sleep! I strangely recall a dream I had while sleeping... it felt as though I were awake. A lucid dream. I remember much of it revolving around me having... heehee... a tea party, of all things, with Owlowicious. Of course, the only thing mildly strange about the party was the fact that Owlowicious was wearing the mind reading helmet Spike found yesterday. He had been hooting for a few moments, before the mind reader finally kicked in... "I say, Twilight, is this really necessary...?" he asked me without speaking. What I noticed was that the helmet gave him an actual "voice" rather than some metallic drone, a bonus to my research!

I nodded. "Sorry if it's a little uncomfortable, Owlowicious. But... this is actually the first conversation I had with you! I'm... a bit nervous."

Owlowicious seemed to hoot a bit again. "No need to worry, Mistress Twilight. This is a privilege for me as well! Why, think of all the research we can finally accomplish together!"

I sighed, as though I were dreaming... which I knew I was. I placed my hooves on my chin, smiling widely at Owlowicious. "Yeah... I know... so many accomplishments..."

It was around that moment that I began waking up. I didn't want it to be a dream anymore... I wanted it to be reality! As I woke up, I looked around the throne room. I didn't bother going up to my bedroom last night. For one, I had to make sure the map wasn't going to appear as soon as I woke up. Fortunately for me, it hadn't. Another reason was because I didn't want to take the helmet upstairs. While I wasn't worried about Spike waking up, I was hoping that a nocturnal Owlowicious wouldn't have fiddled with the machine last night. As much as I knew he loved all things technical and literary, I didn't want him to hear my thoughts or Spike's while we slept. I planned our first conversation a surprise for him.

I slumped off my throne. It was comfortable enough to be a bed all on its own. I trotted with a yawn through the room, until I stopped in front of the machine on a shelf. I smiled a bit exhaustedly... sure, I knew I had to test it on Gummy first... but after that... opportunities!

I knew Pinkie was extremely punctual... some could say that it rivaled mine but... haha! Let's be real here! Everypony knows for a fact I am on-the-dot punctual! And if I wasn't... then I'd make it so! Knock knock. Ha! She was a minute and twenty seconds after sunrise! She was late! I knew I was the most punctual!

I smiled to myself as I trotted to the door of the castle. Even from the throne room I could hear it, considering how roomy this place was. I opened the door to the castle, seeing Pinkie Pie standing and smiling as gleefully as always. On her tail, Gummy was latching on with all the strength in his jaws. Granted, it had to be a lot considering he lacked teeth. The pair trotted inside, before I closed the door. "Sorry I'm late, Twilight! Gummy here loves bubble baths!" Heh... so you think, Pinkie.

"Well, you're not too late. So, where would you like to place Gummy?"

"Oh, here, there, anywhere! Gummy won't mind I told him about this and he said he was fine with whatever!" Sure he did, Pinkie...

"Well, bring him to the throne room, Pinkie. We can put him on the map's resting spot, considering it isn't active currently. Let me just wake up Spike to get a recorder." Even if the responses from Gummy aren't... satisfactory... I'm sure whatever he comes up with, I can send to Princess Celestia.

I trotted to the chamber with Pinkie and Gummy in tow, before I pointed a hoof to the map's table for them to wait. I saw them both sit tightly, and satisfied, I trotted to the bedroom quietly. I saw Spike sleeping in his small bed, and Owlowicious sleeping on his perch. I trotted quietly to Spike, nuzzling him a bit. After a moment, he grumbled a bit, before waking up. "Mmm... j-just five more minutes..."

"Please, Spike?"

He tossed and turned a bit more, before slowly rising from his cot. He stretched, rubbed his eyes, and yawned. "A-alright... I'm up... I'm up... what do you need, Twilight?"

"Spike, could you please, um... fetch me a recording device? I wish to record Gummy's... eh... conversation."

I saw him grumble a bit, probably because he was still sleepy. I never liked waking him up but I almost always needed assistance with keeping this place organized. He walked out of the room, and after a moment of watching Owlowicious snore for a bit, I did as well. After regrouping in the throne room with Spike, Pinkie, and... Gummy... I retrieved the machine from its shelf and trotted back to the three, Spike holding a large recorder in his claws. "Ready, Twilight!"

I yawned a bit. "Well, might as well get this over with." I rolled my eyes a bit, before placing the helmet onto Gummy. Obviously, it was too big for him. In fact, so big that it completely hid him underneath the helmet. I knew I had to scale it down but if any of my shrinking spells messed up any of the hardware within, the device would be ruined. And so would my ideas.

Ugh... do I want to take that risk? Sure I can build a new helmet, but... it would take awhile. And I already sent a note to Princess Celestia that I would send this in immediately. So it has to be now... or never... and if it was never, I'd go stark raving mad! I glimmered my horn, focusing on the helmet. OK then... now... turn... small... carefully...

It's working... it's working...! Oh, don't get too excited now; remember you need to stay calm, Twily. I saw the helmet shrink a bit more, before Gummy became visible again from beneath, and the helmet sat perfectly on his head. I stopped. Yes! Yes! Wait... we're not out of the woods yet, Twily... still gotta make sure it works...

I neared my hoof to the activation switch, flicking it. The machine glimmered and buzzed to life. Haha! Victory! Oh yes, oh yes, my magic... is awesome! I felt myself tapping my hooves in excitement, the others waiting for me to get on with my experiment. And they were right... it was going to be exciting! I cleared my throat, and motioned to Spike to turn on the recorder. As soon as he did, I began. "Experiment 'Gator Whisperer', Stage One. Test subject: Gummy. Objective: Communicate and converse with a domesticated reptile. Hypothesis: Not much." I chuckled a bit, before turning to Gummy.

He stared at me... er... and Pinkie. Well... he was staring at us both with eyes diluted in different directions. He blinked his right eye slowly, before blinking his left eye. "Er... OK, Gummy... how are you feeling today?"

He merely stared... emptily... at us both. I expected this sort of silence from him. I floated a notepad over to me, and held it with my magic as I floated a quill near it as well, scribbling the dialogue. Not that there was any.

"OK... um... how do you feel about Pinkie raising you?" I wrote this down in my notepad as well.

"...I'd say quite satisfied, I suppose."

I felt myself stop suddenly, my ears twitching. I glanced up from the notepad, staring at Gummy. I turned to Pinkie. "Did... you say that...?"

"Nope! Gummy did!"

...what. I turned back to the gator. "Wait... him? He said that?"

"Why is that so hard to believe?" I heard respond, the voice low, almost rasping but perfectly clear.

I felt myself frozen in shock... there was no way that this alligator could respond! But... I shook it off, and scribbled what I thought I heard in the dialogue. "Um... OK. Spike, you can stop answering the questions. Don't know how you're doing the voice but it's not funny."

"Uh... that... isn't me, Twilight."

"It's quite alright, Spike. I'm largely ignored by most ponies," the voice spoke again. I turned to the helmet, seeing it glimmer as it "spoke" the thoughts. It... it was true, then. Gummy... Gummy was talking.

"Er... s-sorry... I didn't actually expect you to respond..."

"I suppose not..." Gummy looked around a bit. "This place is... quite beautiful."

"Er... th-thanks... so then... Gummy..." I slowed to a stop. Many thoughts raced through my mind. If this was, indeed, Gummy's thought process... he must have quite a high IQ. To process these thoughts... to analyze the scenery... even to consider his social status among ponies... Princess... I think we may have hit the jackpot here...

Gloomy.

Gloomy.

I scribbled down into my journal. Until today, I had never believed that Gummy had a hidden intellectual side to him! But now... oh my gosh, think of all the possibilities! Clop clop clop clop clop. I was beginning to tap my hooves a bit in excitement. Keep it together, Twily. Keep it together. You're now in the presence of a very intelligent alligator! Wow, never thought I'd hear myself think that in my life.

I cleared my throat. "Ahem. Alright then, Gummy. I'm going to ask a few questions and requests. I'd like it if you could answer them to the best of your ability."

"If it shall be your wish, I shall answer as best I can."

"Great! First thing... may you state your full name, please?" It might be ridiculous, but... maybe Gummy had a surname that nopony ever learned. I'd like to identify him as such.

"My full name, Princess, is Gloomy 'Gummy' Scales." I slowed my writing down. Gloomy?

"Er... who, uh... named you?"

"Why, Miss Pie, of course. Miss Maud Pie. Miss Pinkamena Diane Pie gave me the name 'Gummy' upon finding my name too... depressing... to pronounce." Boy, I'll say it is.

"So, then... Maud... named you Gloomy...?"

"Yes."

"Er... why? No offense to her but... you live with the pony that might be the antonym of gloomy." There were others I knew that could also qualify for that spot.

"Aw, thanks, Twilight! Although I think Cheese Sandwich is also a good contender ooh and Party Favor too!" Actually, those two could give Pinkie a run for her bits.

"So why is that the case, Gum- er... what would you rather go by?"

"Princess, you may identify me as Gummy. I have accepted it." He then turned to me, his eyes no longer diverted and both focusing intently on me. I've... never seen Gummy appear so intense before. Or to be as serious as he was now. "Princess Twilight... look at me. Ask yourself... what do you see?"

Huh... it was... confusing, to say the least. I thought I could answer the question earlier, but... now... it was honestly much more perplexing to even think about. What did I see in front of me...? I saw the alligator I always thought I knew... small, cute... a little on the disgusting side I'll admit but... he was Pinkie's closest friend. But... it's so hard to see that now. The way he spoke... the way he thought... it just... made him into somepony else...

I cleared my throat, and slowly answered, "I see... I see the alligator that has always lived with Pinkie, Gummy."

He seemed to chuckle a bit. Immediately when I heard it, I knew it wasn't out of agreement with my answer. It seemed... ironic. Contradictory. "...I am a dwarf of a reptile, Princess. My short stature is not due to my age... in fact, I am a mature alligator, your highness. I have no teeth. I have no way to protect myself from other alligators or cragadiles, Celestia forbid those wretched things. I am deemed insignificant by most if not all of the ponies in this town. No one can understand me save for Spike, Miss Pinkamena, and Miss Maud. Everyday I question myself... what is my purpose in life? What can I do to make myself useful to Ponyville... to Equestria?"

"...Gummy...?" Pinkie asked, undeniably shocked.

He continued without pause. "So I ask you again, Princess... what do you see when you look at me? Because every time I look in a mirror... I see a useless reptile. A scaled dwarf. One that does not and cannot provide any purpose whatsoever to his community."

...I can't believe it. It was so clear... yet I couldn't see it. Gummy... h-how could he think like this? He lived with Pinkie Pie, for Celestia's sake! And... to think he was a fully mature gator!? I always thought he was a baby gator and that his teeth hadn't grown out yet! To think he was so unhappy with his self... I... I have to know... "...Gummy... this is very important... please answer this to me... to Pinkie Pie... as honestly as possible. What... what do you want to do now...?"

He didn't move... didn't blink. He had noticed Pinkie Pie starting to sniffle a bit... it was... it was always so strange... so unlike her... to see her sad. "...I've wanted to help my town since the moment I arrived, your highness. I just... I've never known how."

"B-but... you help me plan my parties, Gummy... you've already helped this town out more than you think I know you have!"

Gummy sighed. "...Princess Twilight... I have a request that I wish for you to grant me, if it is not any trouble."

"...what is it?"

He gazed up at me, his eyes almost begging for something. "...leave this helmet on me. Maybe... maybe this is my chance at helping Ponyville. Being granted the right to speak... the right to think... to voice... it's a godsend. One I wish to use to the best of my abilities. Please, Princess... I beg you... don't take this away from me."

...if I did... he'd be even more unhappy. How could I take something away... something so unique... so powerful... after just granting it? I picked Gummy up in my hooves. Every time I would touch him before, I was honestly disgusted. But now... now I feel closer to him than I ever did before. I embraced him, before setting him back down. I turned to Pinkie Pie. "Pinkie, I'm leaving the helmet on!"

She smiled widely, trotting to Gummy and wrapping him in a bear hug. "Yay! Gummy, you get to keep the helmet on! You get to finally go for your dreams! Just know that I always love you!"

Gummy chuckled a bit. "I love you more."

"No, I love you more!"

"I love you more."

Pinkie seemed to raise Gummy to her face, before she shouted at the top of her lungs, "I love you more!" I rubbed my ears a bit. I forgot how loud Pinkie can get sometimes. Gummy shot his tongue out at Pinkie's cheek, lapping upwards a bit, before nuzzling her. "May we go home, Miss Pinkamena?"

"Yes we may, Gummy! See you, Twilight!" Pinkie trotted out with Gummy on her back. I smiled a bit... but... something in the back of my head bugged me... something about the helmet... what... what did Gummy plan to do to help Ponyville...?

Indecent Proposal

I scribbled into my journal. Day 6... huh... time flew by really fast. I shook the thought from my head. Gotta stay focused, Twily. I began writing once more. It's been almost a week since Gummy has had the helmet. Princess Celestia and Princess Luna were the first to hear about this on Day 1. I've already begun work on building another helmet. While the new model, I expect, will not be as rough and complex as the first model, it should work just as exceptionally. Perhaps I can make one for each of my friends... it makes communicating with our companions much easier. Model #2 should be finished by tomorrow earliest, the next day latest.

I yawned, feeling my eyelids sink a bit. Gosh... I haven't slept much this past week. I just can't help it, though. Gummy... Gloomy... er... oh, yeah, right, Gummy... he's already introduced himself to... I yawned once more thinking about it. He met everypony in town formally... he even helped Cheerilee with a demonstration on... ah... I felt myself yawn again. Snap out of it... T-Twily...

Mmm... yep... I'm still surprised that he helped the school. But... that's Gummy for you... I struggled to stay awake... but the sleep was calling me... and the light was starting to fade a bit... do they always do tha-

I nudged my head against something. It felt a bit damp... yet... cool to the touch. I didn't want to open my eyes... heh, it's like they had a mind of their own... and just didn't want to budge. I nuzzled the damp spot more, before it began to feel a bit slimy. Wait... slimy. Immediately, my eyes lost their mind, and they immediately opened. I glanced down to where I felt the coolness coming from, around my left cheek. Oh no... I drooled in my sleep! Uh... I hate that!

I pulled my face off from the map. It hadn't revealed itself in days. I suppose that's a good thing... an Equestria with no problems is an Equestria I'd like to keep. I focused a bit, still tired and drowsy. With a bit of thought, I brought a towel forth with my magic, and wiped both my cheek and the map's center with it. I stretched in my throne a bit, before standing up, trotting a bit around the room to get the feeling back in my legs.

After a moment, I decided my mind, body, and soul were fully awake, and I trotted outside the castle. The sun was just beginning to rise, and Ponyville lay in a deep golden auburn hue. I suppose waking up early has its rewards. Beautiful ones at that. I could go for a morning stroll, feel the slight chilliness of dawn before the heat of the sun kicks in. Or I could-

"Twilight!"

The sound of a pink siren startled me, and Pinkie rushed towards me, breathing heavily and looking distressed. Oh my gosh... what happened? "Pinkie, what's the matter?"

She began to quiver a bit. I didn't know if this was her Pinkie Sense or just her dilemma. "G-Gummy! I know I shouldn't read letters that aren't for me and I'm sorry Twilight but I got one in the mail that was for Gummy and when I opened it I... I... I couldn't believe it..."

"What's wrong, Pinkie?"

She began to sniffle a bit. Oh no... she was gonna start sobbing again. "It was a talent agency!"

A... talent agency? Uh... was this bad news? "Er... Pinkie? I... don't see what's wrong with a business promoting itself."

She wiped her eyes, yet they still remained misty. "...I... I always said I'd support Gummy with whatever he wanted to do... but... i-if he wants to do this... Twilight... I don't know how I'm gonna take him being gone from my life...!" Her eyes began to flood... I merely grimaced. Again... this was something I hardly ever saw Pinkie do.

"...well... Pinkie... while I am concerned about Gummy... we don't know that he'll even want to accept their offer! Why, he might even decline, and you wouldn't have to worry about not being able to see him!"

She slowly stopped crying, yet remained sniffling. "Y-you're saying... there might be a chance he... he might not leave...?"

"Of course, Pinkie."

She seemed to stop sniffling, and her smile returned. Then it turned into a wide grin. "I read you loud and clear, Twilight! You're saying I should hide the letter! Act like it was never sent!"

Wait, what!? "No, Pinkie, that's not what I meant when-!" She cut me off before I could finish.

"Oki dokey, Twilight! Great plan! But there's a lot to consider like the ponies who sent it the mailpony the post office the mailbox the envelope did you know that some envelopes make you lick them before you close them I always thought that was weird but anyways yeah! It's the perfect plan! And here's what we do!"

"Pinkie, I didn't say-"

She seemed to pull a white board from the bushes near the castle... did she leave that there before!? She began scribbling onto it, and in a matter of seconds the board illustrated a set of drawings of... a castle, an envelope, a city, Gummy, and... I think that's a goat? "Step 1! We take this envelope and letter, top it with seasoning and dressing, shred it up into little pieces, and feed it to a goat!" OK, it was a goat.

"Pinkie, where are we gonna find-"

"Step 2! We send a response letter to the agency which is located in Los Pegasus and will take approximately two to three business days to arrive saying that Gummy respectfully declines the offer of a part as Moat Alligator #3 in a movie with Daring Do!"

"You can't just forge-"

"Step 3! We both act as if the original letter had never been sent seasoned marinated shredded and fed to a goat so the Gummy will stay and we can have fun together!"

I had enough of Pinkie's silliness. "Pinkie!"

She stopped, stared, and smiled at me. "Yes, Twilight?"

"First off, this plan is... very well detailed... but absolutely ridiculous! Secondly, we can't do this to Gummy. That's extremely rude and uncalled for! Thirdly... for Celestia's sake, don't you see? You can't keep Gummy on a leash, Pinkie. He needs to experience things for himself. He wants to do something with his new talent. You can't take that away from him."

She stared at me quietly. What was she thinking? She then grimaced. Uh-oh. "Twilight, you just don't understand the unbreakable bond me and Gummy have. We would go to the ends of the Earth together! And nopony can take that away from us. I'm sorry Twilight, but... I can't let you take it away." She trotted off.

Oh no... if she was going through with this silly plan... it'd be extremely unfair for Gummy. And it'd be even worse if he did find out. He'd probably want to leave knowing Pinkie was trying to fix his life for him. I didn't want to take away their love for each other... I just wanted what he wanted... even if... even if it meant he had to say goodbye.

No. I've got to stop her. Pinkie may not realize it, but Gummy will still love her no matter what, wherever he will be. I galloped to Sugarcube Corner, racing against the clock now.

I arrived shortly, seeing no sign of Pinkie or Gummy. I turned to the mailbox in front of the bakery, and reached for it. Suddenly, I felt my hoof held back by something... I can't open another pony's mailbox! That's immoral! I sighed. Oh boy... this was going to be tougher than I thought.