A Sea Of Troubles

by anonpencil

Rating: mature
Tags: Pinkie Pie, Sex, Human, Anon, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark, Other, Second Person, Comedy, Rarity, Non-consensual, Fluttershy, Random
Length: 4221

Anon learns the hard way that you shouldn't try to spy on your friends on a hot summer's day. Especially at a private beach. Especially when Sea Ponies are involved.

It's a hot day in Equestria, the kind of day that boils your brain in its own juices. Anon really just wants to get cool, but the other ponies aren't sharing where their special place is for beating the heat. Still, following them probably isn't such a good idea, especially considering that ominous sign by the beach about Sea Ponies.

Curiosity killed the cat, Anon. Won't you ever learn?
(This is an anonpencil writes drunk oneshot. Beware.)

Listen to the one and only Flutterpriest read this story out loud! No, I'm not kidding.

Published 2015-06-17 17:10:02 UTC
Last updated 2015-06-17 17:10:02 UTC

Water you waiting for?

Author's Note

I was drunk and hungry when I wrote this. I firmly believe that both of these things show in the writing. It is advisable that you read this in the same state that I wrote it in.
I am also drunk right now.
But what else is new.
Enjoy.

Water you waiting for?

In all your days in Equestria, it has never been this damned hot.

You lounge under the shade of the library, wishing as hard as you can that those blasted pegasi might shift a cloud or two your way, anything to help block out the brighter than usual sun. But no, it's not moral to mess with the weather to please your friends, Dash says. Wouldn't be right, she says. Yet you remember too well back to last Nightmare Night the way she summoned up a thundercloud whenever the hell she wanted to shock you and the others with bolts of lightening. What a hypocritical bitch.

So instead, here you lie, sweltering, sweating through the way-too thick and ornate clothes that Rarity has made for you. You'd go to the pond, but it's all but dry and crazy crowded this time of day. You'd throw of the clothes, but who knows how much ponies might be upset by your nudity, not to mention the insult to Rarity. Nope, it's just easier to suffer.

You're suffering so much, in fact, that you almost don't notice Pinkie Pie, Fluttershy, and Rarity headed past, giggling amongst themselves like teenagers. What does eventually catch your eye is the flowered bathing cap on Rarity, and the large inner-tube around Pinkie's waist.

Some part of your boiling lizard brain recognizes that those things are linked to water. And water is good. Water is cool. You want that. Stand up, stupid, ask them where they're going.

“Hey!” you call out loudly.

All three ponies jump, and Fluttershy lets out a squeak of alarm. They turn in near perfect unison, and both the yellow and white pony regard you warily, far more warily than usual. You tell yourself it must be the heat. Besides, more important matters need to be discussed, such as water. Pinkie bounds forward.

“Hiya Anon, are you having a super-de-duper day like me? Because It's a really crazy fantastic day and I-”

You quickly cut her off with a raise of your hand before her ramblings become unbearable. Usually you quite like the pony, but it's just too. Damn. Hot for this today. Though, you find in your heat addled mind, you're wondering if her hair tastes likes cotton candy. It certainly looks like it.

Stop it, you're hot, not hungry, stick with the subject.

“Are you going swimming?” you ask.

In the background, you again see the two ponies wince backwards, just a little. Maybe your eagerness is showing on your face, but you really don't care at this point. Pinkie smiles and opens her mouth to say something, when Rarity suddenly darts forward and claps a marshmallow hoof over her mouth.

Damn it, why is everything food to you today.

“Not as such Darling, no,” she croons, looking very uncomfortable. “We're just going out for a little walk is all, sorry to disappoint.”

“B-but Rarity...” Fluttershy murmurs.

The white pony shoots her a pointed look and she silences with a mild blush. OK, this is weird. Meanwhile, as Rarity is distracted by staring daggers at Fluttershy, Pinkie uncorks rarity's hoof from her mouth and frowns at her.

“You mean we're not going swimming?” She asks quickly. “But I thought you said we could go to the beach and-”

“Pinkie!”

“Yes?” she says with a smile in response to the Rarity's snapped retort.

You glance between the three of them, thoughts forming very, very slowly in your overheated heat.

“What's going on?” you say with a raised eyebrow. “You guys don't want me going to the beach with you?”

Rarity lets out a long, low sigh of defeat, and puts both hooves back on the dusty ground. She looks regretful, embarrassed even, and the sight makes you uneasy. She only usually looks like that when she's asked Spike to do something unspeakable, and he's somehow injured himself and needs help, the poor fucking sap.

“It's not exactly like that,” she says slowly. “It's somewhat of a...private beach, so to speak.”

“That sounds exactly like you don't want me going.”

“It's not that I wish you not to come along, believe me dear,” Rarity says defensively. “I just suspect the beach wouldn't suit your...particular interests.”

You have no idea what that means, but you do understand one thing. There is a beach. With water. Cool, beautiful water. And at this point you've made up your mind that you're going, one way or the other.

“I see,” you say with a glare.

Rarity offers you a sympathetic look as a consolation prize. A shitty prize to say the least, and you don't let it soften your determination any.

“Dreadfully sorry dear, but you do understand. Consider this a bit of...girl time.”

“Yay girl time!” Pinkie Pie cries out in a high pitched shriek.

Everyone winces at the harsh sound, but Rarity keeps up her apologetic smile like she's done it all her life.

“Now then, must be off. Do have a good day, won't you?” she says, joining Fluttershy.

You look at each of them. Pinkie is grinning and bouncing like that horny skunk in cartoons you used to watch back home. Rarity is backing away like you might snap and spring at her any minute now. You have to admit, it is tempting to do so, considering that you know that they're keeping you from a place where you can get cool, but you restrain yourself and focus on the endgame. Fluttershy keeps her head low, eyes pointing directly at the ground, as usual, not even attempting to meet your gaze. All three at last turn and depart, and you hear a small eruption of laughter as the distance grows between you.

You can't help but crack a crooked, scheming smile as you watch them go. With the noise they're making, they should be easy to follow.

“Oh, I will have a good day, don't worry,” you say as they all move slowly away. “It's gonna be a good day come hell or high water.”

-

It seems like you walk for miles behind them, carefully ducking and crouching behind bushes and trees, before you even begin to smell the soft, wafting perfume of ocean spray. But when it does hit you, it's more intoxicating than any sort of food, woman, or flower you've ever smelled. It takes all the effort you have not to rush past them and throw yourself into the sea. But you can't see the waves yet. There could be a trick to it, some special way of getting there, especially if it's a secret beach. This place is full of weird logic and tricks and rules like that, so you cant blow your cover now. You bite your tongue and order your brain to be patient. Still, it's hard to do while that particular organ is boiling in it's own juices like your skull is a stew pot.

You can hear the girls chatting and giggling with each other, and even Fluttershy looks a little more upbeat than usual. This place really must be something special. As you slip between a large ash tree and a smaller, bright-green bush, you spot a sign ahead to the side of the trail. You squint your eyes at it, trying to make out the small black text under the much larger, red header that says “DANGER.” As you're able to dart a little closer, you see what it says in full.

DANGER: Sea Ponies. Do Not Enter.

The girls, of course, walk right past as if they hardly even see the sign, or perhaps don't care. That's strange, you would think that Fluttershy would be more nervous about anything labeled dangerous. And what in the actual fuck are Sea Ponies?

With some trepidation, you pass the sign yourself, stopping for just a split second to see the small drawing at the bottom of what looks like the lower half of a shark or dolphin, and the upper half of a horse. Nope, not creepy at all. But in just another moment, all that is forgotten.

You hear a crash and rippling rush of a wave breaking and then pulling itself back into the sea. You feel a cold breeze against your cheek, like a caress or beckoning kiss. And you see the hills fall away to reveal a horizon lined in blue. The ocean...

You've never felt more aquatic in your entire life. You're not sure how long you stand, peering out from behind a tree, just admiring the view, before your body again reminds you how hot you are and urges you onward. Just a little further now, and you can be cool! You find yourself almost running, picking your way down the sandy path easily, though the girls are no longer in sight to guide you. You come around a bend and sand dune, and suddenly...

You stop.

Well, you've found the girls, and not a moment too soon. Because they're in pretty deep shit. Or...water. Or, you know, something deep, whatever.

Before you, in the expanse of blue and white accents, the sun makes silver and gold ripplings that dance across the ocean's surface. Among those masses of shining and metallic colors, three small dots of canary yellow, pink, and white thrash to and fro. Splashes erupt around them as their hooves rise and fall in frantic paddling motions, and their heads toss like the waves. It takes a moment to click in your head what's going on here, and when it does, you're still unable to force yourself to move for quite a few moments afterwards.

Dear god, they're drowning. No clue how, or why, but they're drowning. Even with the sun beating down on you, you feel yourself go cold all over as the color drains from your face. You have to do something, you realize. You have to help, have to save them.

And then you're running, sprinting down to the beach, already tearing off your shirt and focusing on the pony closest to you, Fluttershy. As you draw near the water's edge, you can now hear their frantic, panicked cries and see the flush in their cheeks from the effort it takes to keep afloat. For fuck's sake, why would they go swimming if they were so fucking bad at this? You've never understood pony logic, and you suspect their brains are really made of candy or some other sugary confection, and rot or melt periodically.

Damn it, food again? Come on, Anon, there are lives at stake here.

You reach the water, and as your foot first plunges into the frothy tide as it ebbs away from the shore, you feel a shock from the ball of your foot all the way up the back of your calf and thigh. Sweet technicolor pony vagina that feels amazing...

No time, enjoy it later, be captain hotdog hero now. And what did I just fucking say, stop thinking about food.

All your time spent in swim classes comes back to you in a flash as you spring forward and submerge yourself up to your neck in the salty spray. You remember how to paddle while holding someone, how to float with them...you wonder if it's any different because ponies are shaped so weird, but no time to think about that. You can see Fluttershy bobbing up and down in the waves just a short distance away.

Somehow, none of them seem to have noticed you yet, and none are actually calling for help. Mostly they just seem to be screaming or crying out like they're in pain, and gasping for air and...giggling? You hear Pinkie let out a sudden gigglesnort across the waves from you.

“Hey, that tickles!” you manage to make out between arm strokes and the water lapping about your ears.

OK, weird, yes, but you hardly give pause. If anyone would be laughing while drowning, it would be Pinkie, after all.

You're almost within arm's reach of Fluttershy now. You can do it, you can save her! The water churns white around her with her frenzied splashes, and you see her throw her head back and emit a high pitched squeal of anguish.

“Fluttershy, I've got you!” you scream out as you reach for her. “It's OK, I'm here!”

Her head snaps around to face you like she's been possessed. Her eyes go wide with terror and her movements slow. You can see how red her face is with effort, how frightened she looks, how exhausted she must be by now. You're about to be her god-damned knight in shining armor. Who knows, might even get you laid.

You reach out and grab one hoof of her's and pull her sharply to you, wrapping both arms about her in a quick hug of comfort. You can feel her panting against your chest, feel her trembling all over, the poor thing. Then you pull her away and go to wrap your arm around her chest to swim her to safety before you go after the others and...

Wait, why is she pushing you away?

You look down at her, bewildered, as the yellow little pony shakes her head in disbelief and shoves you back, suddenly able to swim quite well all on her own. What the shit is this?

“F-fluttershy?” you stammer.

She keeps shaking her head, but speaks in a breathless, squeaking little whisper.

“Y-you shouldn't be here Anon,” she says.

She looks like she's about the say something else, but she shuts her mouth and goes silent. What does she mean, you shouldn't be here, you're saving their lives for fuck's sake!

Except...you're not...

Seeming to hear the confusion, Rarity has swum over too, again effortlessly, as if she wasn't just drowning, and stares at you with the same fear and distress you'd seen in Fluttershy. It seems none of them are in any swimming distress at all, and you feel the heroic strength and inclination flow out of you instantly.

“Anon! Wha-”

“Hey, me first,” you snap as you tread water. “What the shit is going on here! I thought you were drowning, I-”

“Anon, you need to go! NOW!” Rarity barks at you in a very unladylike way.

“What in the hell-”

There was more to that sentence, but Rarity's warning has come too late, and you feel yourself dragged sharply downwards by your ankle. You have time to take one, large, lung-filling breath of air before your head drops below the surface and water closes above you in one seamless, undulating ceiling.

It takes only a second for your eyes to adjust to the swirling underwater environment, but as you do, you spot what it is dragging you down and down, and it's all you can do not to gasp out your breath of air in shock and horror.

Below you is what looks sort of like a pony. Except...it's not a pony. Below the sea-weed like mane and strangely fish-like eyes, you can see the undulating movement of a tail. Except this is no carefree-flicking pony tail. This looks like that of a dolphin, only more brightly colored and a little shorter.

Are these...are these the fucking sea-ponies from the sign? You suddenly remember how that sign started with the word DANGER.

...shit.

The pony continues to drag you down, and suddenly you spot others like it, of varying colors and sizes. And they're all watching you very intently. What the shit is all this?

Suddenly, through the rush of bubbles in your ears and the rush of the ocean around you, you hear one of the creatures speak.

“An intruder?” he asks simply, very clearly for being underwater.

The one dragging you down by the ankle nods. You feel a rumble of displeasure from the masses through the water around you.

“He seems to be male, here to bother our ladies I assume?”

HIS ladies? These things are here to hurt Fluttershy, Rarity, and Pinkie? You feel a swell of anger in your throat. Or maybe that's just lack of oxygen. Fuck, how long have you not been breathing? Too long. Your lungs are beginning to burn.

“Let us ask him,” one says.

Without warning, a male pony plants a full, lips and tongue kiss on your mouth. Besides being indignant, you can't help feeling your stomach lurch at the disgusting, unappetizing old-tuna like taste of the sea-pony's saliva. At first you flail your arms, arcing to try to land a punch at this fresh son of a bitch. But then you stop.

Sweet sweet oxygen...he's giving you air! You breathe in deeply against his mouth, and as he moves away your lungs at last stop screaming. Now it's your brain screaming that you were just frenched by an equestrian man-fish thing and that on some need-to-breathe-before-you-die level, you liked it.

“So,” the biggest and most colorful pony, a shade of pale red tinged with blue like a fighting fish, says. “Are you here to disturb our women?”

Like an idiot, you try to speak, and much of the fresh breath you've just been given rushes out in a mass of unintelligible bubbles.

Good job.

Still, all the ponies begin to nod as if you've said something satisfactory.

“Ah. I see. Continue with your work then,” the biggest dolphin pony thing says to the others.

They nod and swim upwards to the girls again. You're about to try to free yourself once more to save the ponies when you notice, abruptly, that they're not trying to harm the girls or pull them down.

No...they're...Holy. Shit.

As you watch, the sea ponies produce long, pointed, arcing dicks from their abdomens, ones that seem to move and slither like they have a mind of their own. With simple undulating motions from their tails, they position themselves under and behind the ponies above and begin inserting their thin, winding cocks into your friends' pussies and asses as they see fit. The bodies of the land ponies writhe and thrash as the sea ponies thrust deep, using their fins to find rhythms and angles that might be unheard of to someone not so well equipped.

Everything kind of clicks then, all at once.

They haven't been coming here to swim at all. They've been coming to be fucked by these things, to get off, to have secret little sex orgies with the equestrian equivalent to chicken of the sea. The squeals, the groans, the frantic splashing...it was all from pleasure, not panic.

You feel a lurch of disgust, and also a pang of inadequacy. Shit, you would have scratched that itch if they'd just asked. Never mind that they seem to totally have forgotten about you, even though you've vanished and might be dead for all they know. Some friends they are.

One of the sea ponies removes his dick from Pinkie's tight bubblegum anus and raises it towards her side. You watch in dismay as the dick twists at the top, moving like a finger, to curl over and scratch at the pony's ribs. She squirms, and the line about being ticklish suddenly makes disgusting sense. The dicks are so nimble, prehensile even...

With horror, you suddenly question what it is your sea-pony captor is dragging you through the water with. You look down, almost not wanting to, and spot that he is indeed holding you underwater with his long, pale penis, wrapped protectively around your ankle. What. The. Fuck.

Some girly, child part of your brain begins howling the word 'gross' over and over again in your psyche, and you shake your foot to try to loosen the thing's grip. Instead, it just tightens, and you can feel its hardness rubbing against your skin, beginning to chafe.

“What do we do with it?” the one holding you down asks, suddenly seeming to smile with an idea.

You don't like that look. Stop having ideas you sick, twisty-dicked fucks. You have no desire to be their plaything.

“Why don't we use it as a plaything?”

Fuck.

“Yes,” the big one says with a slow nod. “I wonder what sorts of holes this one has.”

Holes? Oh fuck. Fuck, no. And you thought one putting its penis on your ankle was disgusting.

You feel a tug, and the remaining air in your lungs feels tight and hot, almost gone. You descend, pulled by the pony's agile dick down towards the bottom. You see a sign as you pass some rocks with the words “Rape Cave” written on them in large green letters. The sign is decorated with smiley faces, hearts, and little drawings of fish. Fucking Equestria, where even Rape Caves need to look cute.

You thrash and fight with every ounce of strength that you have left, but a large black cave mouth opens to swallow you in and you're powerless to stop it. Darkness swirls up with the bubbles as you descend into it, ponies swimming in after and around you, their dicks all now exposed and erect with curiosity.

As soon as you can no longer see, and can scarcely breathe, you feel your ankle released. Your boxers are snatched at, grabbed, plucked and torn away from you. You try to swim in the direction you think up is, but whenever you get too far, something, and you know damn well what, grabs you and pulls you back down. You feel the hard, pencil-like tips of penises probing at your now bare skin, searching for a new home. Around you, you can hear them talking about you, trying to guess where your orifices are, where you might be softest, how tight or warm you'll be inside.

You want to scream for help, want to escape, but some part of you knows now...There's not enough air in your body. You're too far from the surface. The penises are too strong. This is how you're going to die. As oxygen deprivation sinks in, your brain still panicking at the idea of drowning, your body starts to go limp. You accept death. Maybe at least, you'll be unconscious by the time one of these things penetrates you.

All at once, you feel another press of slimy fishy lips on yours, and air fills your lungs. What at first is elation and relief, suddenly becomes anguish as you come back to yourself and still feel so many sea-pony dicks probing at you.

“What,” a voice says in the darkness. “Did you think we'd want you unconscious for this? That would be no different than fucking those dead fish that we use so often.”

Wat. You can't have heard that right. But it doesn't matter now, there's so many pressing things to deal with, namely fish penises pressing against all of you all at once. You begin to thrash again, but now you feel dexterous dicks lash out to hold your hands and legs apart. One even winds into your hair to hold your head up.

You try to see through the darkness, but there's nothing there. Just you, naked, darkness, and a ton of erect penises ready to find someplace to relieve their daily swimming stresses. You scream out the breath the pony gave you as something slithers like a hard slick snake up into your ass and you hear the ponies laugh as then begin fucking you.

-

Fluttershy, Rarity, and Pinkie find you on the shore hours later.

You're sitting, naked, wrapped only in the small shred of what was once your shirt. You're shaking all over, staring at the sand like it may contain some of the answers you now seek, and your body is covered in bruises and patches of thick sea-pony slime that has begun to harden into a crusty substance. A stain of blood coats the sand under where you're sitting, mixing pink with the foam of the tide as it washes in and out.

Rarity looks you over with some concern, and steps forward tentatively.

“Are you alright, Anon?”

You turn to look at her, knowing there is no longer any life or soul in your eyes. She stares back at you, seeming to see that you're already dead inside, and then steps back away from you.

“I...I just hope you've learned from this experience,” she says softly.

Say what, bitch? Your head snaps towards her, eyes brimming with anger and sudden hatred. The betrayal of these words, the implications, the questions this all provokes...you need answers, at least from her. You try to burn holes through her white form with her eyes as you await some form of explanation. She looks back, seemingly unshaken and shrugs.

“That you shouldn't spy on people,” she says simply. “It can land you in an sea of trouble.”

You stare at her a moment in stupefied horror, then collapse forward onto the sand, weeping openly as blood continues to flow from your ravaged anus.

In the years to come, no matter how hot it gets, you never go swimming again.

-End-