Chapter 1: The House on the Hill
Ponyville was a relatively compact village. It has been growing recently, due to the massive tree-shaped crystal castle on what was the edge of the town, but for the most part, getting around was simply, as everything was within walking distance.
But there’s always an exception to a rule; an outlier, one thing that isn’t like the others, something that doesn’t belong. Ponyville’s outlier was simply known as the House on the Hill. It was perched on the hill to the north of the village, on the way to Canterlot. For the most part, it was a normal house, even built in the rustic cottage style that Ponyville was known for. But everypony knew that there was something wrong with that place. Whenever somepony went to investigate, they always came back dying of fright, as if they’d seen a ghost.
They say that it was surrounded by a steel fence about halfway down the hill, that everything goes silent once you enter the property, as if the fence completely blocks off the outside world. The house itself was told to basically extrude dark energy, and was guarded by a giant metal monster. They say that some that have investigated never came back to Ponyville, and that those that did had vowed never to return again.
With that in mind, one could probably imagine Ditzy ‘Derpy’ Doo’s nervousness towards having to deliver a parcel there. She looked to her boss. “A-a-are you sure you have the right address?” she stuttered.
“Apparently.” Air Mail said. “It’s a first, but whoever mailed this is wanted this delivered to the House on the Hill.”
Derpy gulped loudly. “I was afraid you were gonna say that.” She said. “Wait, there’s no name on it?”
She looked over the package she held in her hooves, which she discovered, did indeed not have a name for who sent it. It was a large box, much larger than most ponies ever get delivered. She shook the box, ignoring the ‘Fragile’ stamp on the side. It rattled inside, sounding almost like a foal’s shaker toy. And it had to have been a metric ton.
“Well, they did mention that in the letter for us he-or-she sent with the package that due to certain… personal matters, he-or-her could say where he-or-she lived.” Air Mail said. “And he-or-she also added an extra hundred and fifty bits for the confusion.”
Derpy sighed. Of course it came down to bits, it always came down to bits. “I’m not even sure how I’m supposed to carry it the whole way there.” She said. “It weighs a ton.”
Mail shrugged. “Well, ask for help if it overencumbers you on the way there.” She said. “You’re a likable mare, I’m sure somepony would be willing to give you a helping hoof. Now go on, get that parcel delivered! Time is-“
“Money. Yes, Ma’am, I get it.” Derpy said, lower her head in defeat as she lifted the package with all her might and flying slowly out the door.
Saying that making her way through the bustling streets on Ponyville with such a massive parcel went smoothly would’ve been an absolute lie. As she’d expected, the weight of the parcel made it almost unbearable to carry. It left her so unbalanced she had actually almost knocked a couple ponies down, the accidents prevented by them moving themselves out of the way.
Ponyville knew that Derpy was usually a clumsy pony, and had learned that the best way to avoid catastrophes was to avoid her whenever she was doing something. Whenever Derpy came close to hitting somepony, they nonchalantly moved out of her way before going back to their business.
Derpy was confident that she could make it at least to the edge of the town when she left the post office, but was now reconsidering whether that was true or not. Slowly but surely, her wings began to falter as she began to tire out from the package’s weight. Even as strong as she was, which was not very strong anyway, she could feel herself succumbing to gravity as she was pulled towards the ground.
Before she could come to a safe landing, her wings gave way about twenty feet in the air, resulting in her dropping like a stone. She sighed as she struggled to regain consciousness, but knew that even if she did survive a drop from this height, she’d probably lose her job and most likely her ability to fly. She squeezed her eyes shut tight, and prepared herself for the inevitable fate that was calling her.
But, after a few seconds, she realized she wasn’t falling. And not in that she’d survived the crash, since there was no ground supporting her.
She slightly opened one of her eyes, and found herself surrounded in a magenta aura, levitating her about a foot off the ground. In front of her stood a purple Alicorn, a worried expression plastered on her face.
“Hello, Princess.” Derpy said shyly. “Nice weather we’re having today.”
Princess Twilight smiled, happy to see Derpy doing fine. “Well, other than the raining mail ponies.” She said with a laugh.
Derpy laughed with her. “How did you even know I was falling?” she asked.
“You almost knocked me over back in the shopping district.” Twilight said. “I thought you might have some trouble, and followed you in case anything happened. Lucky I did, apparently.”
“Yeah…” Derpy sighed. “This package is a lot heavier than anything I’ve ever delivered before. I was having some trouble carrying it.”
Twilight took the parcel into a separate aura and inspected it. “There’s no name on it.” She stated. “What’s ‘The House on the Hill’?”
Derpy gave Twilight a confused look. “You’ve never heard of it?” she asked.
“No, why?” Twilight asked. “Is there something wrong?”
Derpy shook her head. “There’s not anything terribly wrong about it.” She said. “It’s just a really creepy cottage on the hill outside Ponyville. There are a lot of rumors that go on about it, but I’ve never gone there myself. I’m sure it’s just an urban myth, like the Mirror Pool was supposed to be.”
“Well, that would explain why I’d never heard about it.” Twilight grumbled. She lowered Derpy to the ground, who thanked the Alicorn with her charming smile. “Why don’t I come with you? You obviously can’t carry this… whatever it is on your own.”
Derpy smiled. “I wouldn’t want to bother you, Princess.” She said. “I’m sure you have some royal duties to attend.”
Twilight shook her head. “Why do you think I was in the shopping district?” she asked. “I’m not like Princess Celestia or Luna, I don’t have many important things to do other than watch over the map in the throne room.
Derpy bounced happily up and down. “Well, I’d love to have your company, Princess.” She said gleefully.
Twilight rolled her eyes with a smile and lowered the bouncing Pegasus down to the ground. “Please.” She said. “If we’re going to be taking a friendly walk together, no formalities. Twilight is fine.”
Derpy smiled. “Ok, Princ- I mean Twilight.” She said. She lifted herself two feet of the ground and slowly started moving forward. “Come on, I’ll show you the way.”
Taking a quick second to re-inspect the parcel in her magical grasp, Twilight followed Derpy with to the edge of the town. “Ok, lead on, Miss Doo.”
With Derpy merely leading Twilight in the direction they needed to go, it didn’t take long for them to reach the base of the infamous hill that the house was perched on. Twilight recited the myths about the House that Derpy had told her on the here, and compared it to the real life counterpart.
As she’d been told, about halfway up the hill was a fence, too tall for even a large Stallion like Big Macintosh to climb over. It was a chain-link fence, like the ones they use for the toddlers in a Canterlot daycare, but had foreboding barbed wire around the rim and knotted in with a few rows of chain-links. From this distance, it just looked like a standard house whose owner just wanted to be left alone.
But Twilight knew that you shouldn’t judge something by the way it looks.
“Well, that’s not very welcoming.” Derpy said as the duo approached the fence gate. “I was told it had a fence, but this just looks… scary.”
Twilight nodded in silent agreement. “Come on.” She said at last, opening the gate and walking in. “Let’s deliver the package and see who exactly lives here.”
Derpy swallowed a lump in her throat and nodded silently before slowly following the Alicorn. As soon as they passed the fence line, all noises seemed to stop themselves. The birds they heard outside had fallen quiet; every hoofstep on the gravel path seemed to echo in the complete silence.
‘Just like the myths say.’ Twilight noted.
As they approached the house itself, it appeared much larger than it had from the gate, casting a shadow over them. Twilight looked to Derpy, who was shaking profusely and hiding behind her. “You want me to knock?” she asked.
Derpy smiled nervously and nodded rapidly. “T-t-that’d be nice.” She said.
Twilight slowly approached the front door, the wooden boards that made up the porch creaking under her hooves. Grabbing the knocker with her magic, she pulled it back, slammed it firmly on the door, and repeated twice more.
For a moment, there was complete silence. Neither Twilight nor Derpy said a word, both of them subconsciously holding their breath. After the moment of silence, there came the sound of a heavy hoofstep from inside the house, then another, then another.
‘The house is said to extrude dark energy.’ Twilight recited, mentally adding to the matches between life and myth. She swallowed audibly. ‘…and is guarded by a giant metal monster.’
The hoofsteps were loud now, probably just behind the door. Slowly, the door handle turned from the inside. The two ponies took this differently. Twilight prepared several defensive and offensive spells. Derpy hid behind Twilight.
The door began to open, agonizingly slowly. Twilight closed her eyes and charged her horn, Derpy shook some more.
“Can I help you two?” came a polite, gentlecoltly voice. They looked into the doorway to see what appeared to be a massive metal, bipedal creature, painted to make it look like it was dressed in a tuxedo.
Twilight brought the package in front of her. “Package for the owner?” she said nervously.
The creature inspected the box Twilight was offering before stepping out of their way. “Ah, yes.” It said. “This way, please. My master has been expecting this for quite some time now.”
Twilight looked at Derpy, who looked back, before both entered the house; the metal creature closing the door behind them.
Chapter 2: An Old Acquaintance
Twilight and Derpy were in awe from the interior of the building. Indeed, from the outside, it appeared to be just a normal cottage, with a barbed wire fence surrounding it, but inside; it was an entirely different story.
The interiors of most Ponyville cottages, the one obvious exception being Doctor Whooves' laboratory of a residence, generally was simple, like one would expect from a wood-and-stone house with a thatch roof. This house was the complete opposite. The walls were lined with desks, which had a multitude of different devices and contraptions lying on them. The ceiling had wires and cables taped and bolted to it, a strong current no doubt running through each of them. It was even difficult to walk, due to the loose pieces of metal and spare wires lying aimlessly on the carpeted floor.
"You'll have to forgive the mess." said the metal being. "I have been assisting my Master with his latest experiment. Now that the parts he ordered are here, he can get started on his other projects and I can start cleaning everything."
"What's your master been working on?" asked Derpy.
"Well, he had a theory regarding time travel." he explained. "That having time come forward to you would be more energy efficient than the reverse."
"Uh, I've actually already time travelled." Twilight said. "The spell scroll is in Canterlot, and easy enough as long as you follow it to the letter."
"That's a tad unfortunate." he said. "Well, that was his backup project either way, I doubt he will feel that bad about that one."
Derpy floated off, having grown bored of magic-speak, and moved into one of the rooms that the hallway led to. Inside was about the same as the hallway; wires coming from the ground and hanging from the ceiling, pieces of strange equipment lazily cast on the floor. But the one thing that stood out was a large glass tube in the center of the room, stretching from floor to ceiling, numerous wires connected to the metal bases at the top and bottom. Behind the glass was a large jewel, energies of ever-changing color shimmering on the surface, floating in mid air in the middle of the tube.
"What's this?" she called. She pressed her face to the glass, giggling at the tingling sensation streaking through her body.
Twilight and their escort walked into the room; Twilight gazing at the jewel in awe, the escort politely removing Derpy's face from the glass. "That is the source of this facility's power." he said, placing Derpy on the floor. "It is a very rare gemstone that only develops under very specific circumstances, so you could imagine why I would rather you not touch it or its container."
"Why?" Derpy asked. "What harm could it do?"
"To the Jewel?" the escort asked. "Nothing. It is stronger than anything ponies could create or re-enforce. To you? There are many side effects to prolonged exposure to the gemstone's radiation."
"Like what?" asked Twilight, ripping her attention away from the jewel.
"Come, let us continue our walk to my Master; I'll explain on the way." the creature said, starting to walk down the hallway again.. "As you may know, all ponies have magic inside them, but each tribe accesses their magic slightly differently. Unicorns have active magic, which is channeled through their horn. Earth Ponies have static magic that connects them to their namesake. Pegasai have a different static magic that connects them to the sky and weather."
"Yes, I know." Twilight said. "That's primary school knowledge."
"Well, imagine an airtight container, then continuously fill it with air." He said. "What happens to that container, will happen to a pony, should you prolong your exposure to its rays, only with magical energy instead of compressed air."
Derpy swallowed audibly. "Twilight." she said. "Can we maybe never go into that room again?"
Twilight nodded all to enthusiastically. "Sure." she said. "I think that's a plan."
After that, they walked in silence, occasionally stopping when either they saw something of particular interest or when Derpy hit her head or tripped. Winding down corridors that didn't seem to make sense, taking four right turns in a row at some point, entering hallways that didn't seem to exist until they neared, exploring the impossibility that the cottage was bigger on the inside.
Eventually, they came to a door, which was strange. With the obvious exception being bathrooms, there had been no doors. As a self-titled mare of science herself, Twilight knew this was to reduce the change of both uninvited interruptions and reduce the risk of slamming to doors if and when something important happened. And even the bathroom doors were styled after Ponyville's rustic style.
But this door was massive, easily three times the height of a normal pony, maybe twice as tall as Big MacIntosh, and was made of a solid white metal. A small box made of a similar material was mounted on the wall to the right of the door, an inactive red light above it. No handle was present, with seemingly no way to get through.
The duo's escort opened the box, revealing a small keyboard and a microphone. "Robert." he spoke into the mic. "Model BMP-ECJAIP. Requesting access to Main Laboratory."
The light above the door glowed brightly, and a small wave of light went down Robert's body, then up again, before disappearing and the light switching off again. a female, but oddly monotone voice said.
Using the keyboard beside the Mic, Robert pressed a series of numbers in rapid succession. Twilight quickly memorized the code, just in case. '16, 9, 22, 11, 7, 21, 20, 3, 11, 10, 13, 16, 25.' she noted. 'Strange.'
After a few seconds, the light above the door switched to green and the door slid open on its own. the female voice said, a more sentient tone gracing her voice.
"Thank you Christina." Robert said. "Could you prepare some some refreshments? We have guests."
Christina said.
"I'll have some Jasmine Tea please." Twilight said. "My friend can have anything that doesn't have sugar in it."
Christina said.
"Cancel that order, Christina." came a colts' voice, calling from the other side of the room. "They're going home."
Robert sighed. He looked to Twilight and Derpy. "Wait here." he said. "My Master can be very stubborn at times. Christina, make their drinks."
Derpy nodded and sat down, completely ignoring the crunch of a unknown device being flattened underneath her weight. Twilight did the same, but deep in thought. 'I know that voice...' she thought. 'But from where? From who?'
After a few minutes of Derpy fiddling with her mane and Twilight staying in her trance-like thought processing, Robert eventually came back. Without saying a word, he motioned them to follow. Derpy got up immediately, but had to physically yank Twilight up to break her trance. They followed Robert through an insane maze of wires and parts, the darkness shrouding the Lab not helping in the slightest.
Eventually they came to an opening in the mess of parts, a light conveniently banishing the darkness away in this spot. In the center of the clearing was a table, a set of chairs surrounding it. "Please, sit." Robert said. "My master is not used to guests... or other ponies for that matter. He'll be with you shortly."
"So..."Twilight said, sitting on the uncomfortable wooden. "What's your master's name?"
"Processor." said the colt's voice again, as a pony's silhouette became visible in the shadows. "Central Processor. The one, true scientist in all of Equestria."
'Central Processor...' Twilight thought. 'That sounds familiar.'
The pony stepped into the light, revealing a brown-coated stallion; probably about her age, with a black mop of a mane. He lifted the reflective goggles that he was wearing on his face, revealing a case of Heterochromia Iridum; one eye being brown, the other being a green-ish hazel. He wore a white lab coat on his body, much of it covered in black-ish brown filth.
"Wait a minute." Processor said, his gaze meeting Twilight's. He walked around the table and inspected Twilight. "Color's the same, mane and tail's the same..." he pulled a small handheld device from inside his coat and raised it to her horn. "Magical frequency's the same." He moved to her wings. "Those are new."
Derpy looked at Processor, then back to Twilight. "Do you know him?" she asked Twilight.
"I don't know." Twilight said. "I think so."
Central put a hoof to his chest. "Oh I'm hurt, Twilight." he said, his voice dripping with feign sadness. "You don't remember me? I thought we were friends." He looked up and gave a cheeky smile, which faded with Twilight's blank expression. "Seriously? You actually don't remember me?"
Twilight gave a nervous laugh. "I'm sorry, sir." she said. "You must've mistaken me for somepony else."
Central facehoofed. "I can't believe it." he said. "It's me, Central Processor! Your old lab partner from Canterlot." Twilight's eyes widened. She beamed and wrapped her hooves around Central. "It's good to see you still remember me, Twily." he said. "But I still need air."
"What are you doing here?" Twilight said, letting the stallion breath. "I haven't seen you since before I left for Ponyville!"
"So you do know him?" Derpy asked again. "It sure seems that way."
Twilight mentally smacked herself. "Right." she said. She gestured to Central. "Derpy, this is Central Processor; an old acquaintance from when I lived in Canterlot."
"Charmed, I'm sure." Central said.
Twilight gestured to Derpy. "Central, this is Ditzy 'Derpy' Doo, the Mail Mare from Ponyville."
"Nice to meet you!" Derpy said with her signature smile. "It's not everyday I get to meet somepony new... that isn't trying to take over Equestria anyway."
Central laughed loudly, his eyes watering from the outburst. "Taking... over..." he said in between laughs. "Oh, that's a good one." He looked to the two mares, whom were looking at each other with awkward smiles on their faces. "What? It was a funny joke."
"How long have you been here?" Twilight asked. "Alone in this lab?"
"About three years." Central answered nonchalantly. "Why?"
"I wasn't joking." Derpy said. "Since the previous Summer Sun Celebration, about a year ago I think, we've had several threats to Equestria's safety, and some to others."
"Really?" Central asked. "I hadn't heard. Who was attacking?"
Twilight cleared her throat and made a long sheet of paper materialize in front of her. "Well..." Twilight started. "First there was Nightmare Moon on the Summer Sun Celebration; she's good now, ruling with Celestia as Princess Luna. Then Discord attacked; also good, living with either me or my friends. Then the Changeling Queen; apparently named 'Chrysalis', attacked. Not sure what happened to her; she was kind of shot into the distance by a love-fueled shield. Then King Sombra attempted to re-take the Crystal Empire. He's... been disposed of. Then a pony named Sunset Shimmer attempted to use an alternate version of Equestria's citizens to take over this version; also good, but still in the alternate world. Then Lord Tirek escaped from Tartarus and attempted to steal Equestrian Magic; he's back in his cell. Then most recently, a pony named Starlight Glimmer attempted to brainwash me and my friends into joining her 'Equalists'. She probably would've gone onto the rest of Equestria, but we stopped her."
Twilight looked up from her list, seeing Derpy and Central's dumbfounded expressions. The latter chuckled quietly. "Well, good to know you haven't changed a lot."
"Did you really keep an entire list of the recent threats?" Derpy asked.
"I've been trying to figure out why they've only been escaping now." Twilight said, shrugging. "You can't blame me, can you? It is kind of strange."
Central tapped his chin. "Strange in deed..." he said to himself.
After dabbing a few rather uninteresting miscellaneous conversations, and his guests' drinks finally being delivered and drank, Central straightened his lab coat's collar. "So, back to business." he said. "What brings you to my little workshop?"
"They brought your package, sir." said Robert, who strode out from the shadows. "I've already unpacked and ordered the parts by your orders."
"Thank you, Robert." Central said. After a few moments of quiet, he cleared his throat to break the silence. "Well, it's was nice meeting you, Miss Doo. And Twilight; it really has been lovely catching up; but I have work to do, things to invent, chemical elements to discover."
"Okey doke!" Derpy said. "I'll see you later, Central!"
Central chuckled. "I doubt it, but keep thinking that." he said. He raised Twilight's hoof and kissed it. "Milady." he said jokingly. "'Tis been a pleasure. I hope to see you again."
Twilight blushed slightly at the childish joke, but smiled at his humor. "Well, you could come with me, you know." she said. "There's a scientist in Ponyville who would love to meet you, and you could stay at my Castle if you want."
Central's eyes grew to the size of dinner plates. "You have a CASTLE now?" he asked. "Wasn't that tower in Canterlot enough?"
Twilight laughed. "I promise I'll explain everything if you come with me." she offered.
"Ehh... I'd love to, really I would." Central said. "But I need to maintain my equipment. Much of what's in this room is very unstable and needs to be properly maintained."
"Do not fret, sir." Robert called from across the room. "I shall see to it that the Laboratory stays spotless."
Central smiled. "Then I guess I'll go." he said. "Thank you, Robert."
Author's Note
This took WAY longer than it needed to.
Also, the key is Memories. Can't do anything without 'em.
