I'm Coming Home

by Arreis Of Avalon

Rating: everyone
Tags: Sad, Princess Luna, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 1485

What is home? And what is love? It took Luna some time, but she knows now.

What is home? And what is love? It took Luna some time, but she knows now.

Written for The Competitive Writers Guild . The prompt, "A Journey Home".

Published 2015-06-21 19:10:01 UTC
Last updated 2015-06-21 19:10:01 UTC

Tell The World

The stars were bright that night. They shimmered, lighting up the sky in the only way they could; burning. They burned themselves, just to save the sky from the deep, soul sucking darkness they were swallowed in. The blackness of the night was banished, but only in the blackness. Down in Equestria, the little pinpricks of light were akin to fireflies: small and meaningless. Stars, like the sky, went unappreciated by most.

Yet, some ponies did appreciate them. These ponies took the time to research them and even go so far as to name them. They named them so many things; Andromeda. Cancer. Equuleus. Taurus, even the Ursa Minor and Major. The stars had so many various names, forgotten or modern. They had many, many names.

As did she, Luna thought with the softest of sighs.

Luna. Lunar Princess. The Night. The Nightmare. Nightmare Moon.

She closed her eyes. Yes. She was called Nightmare Moon, even after all this time. Even after so long, long after she had hoped to be forgiven, or even just forgotten, she was still met with scorn. She saw the fear, dread, hatred in each nightmare she still bothered to view. She was well hated.

But she was loved as well, she told herself. Just as some loved the stars, appreciated them, she was still remembered, at least by a few. She was still thought of; cared about; loved. Celestia loved her. There was Celestia, at the very least.

But ever so few. Always so few. Just like the stars.

She opened her eyes, looking at her bare hooves, the regalia she wore discarded at least for the time being. Her actions in the past could have caused so much bloodshed. She could almost see it, staining her hooves. She knew it was a false image of a possible past, but she couldn’t deny the feelings. Those feelings of disgust at her actions; had she truly been so blind?

Luna looked up at the myriad stars that night as she thought of love and how much she had forsaken to have spent so much time on the moon. She contemplated them, her eyes shining as they did. The stars banished night. Did they banish nightmares as well? Had the time she had spent among them changed her, in some way? Softened her? Would those few who loved her change their minds? Would those who hated her do the same?

She sighed again, unable to keep the disastrous thoughts from her mind. She knew she was not well loved by the ponies of Equestria. She knew that some would hate her, even after meeting her again, after learning of the true princess of the night. Was it so wrong of her to want love? She had thought about the answer to that question for so many years. So very many years, alone with stars. They were the only friends she had. Aries, Gemini, Leo and Sagittarius. So many different stars; so many burning friends.

What was the answer? Was it wrong to be loved? Was it wrong to want love? Because, what was love really but a longing for home?

Luna shut her eyes again. The shining of stars was gone, and along came darkness again. She saw blackness. She loved the dark. After all, who else would?

She felt tears rolling down her face soon. It had been a long time since she had cried; how many years? 20? 200? 500, a million for all she knew. Who could tell, at this point. History had all but forgotten her and her tear tracks had never left marks in any history books. Nopony would care if the princess of the night cried. Nopony would write her grief alongside her betrayal; somehow, the fact that nopony cared for her tears was almost a relief. There was nopony to see her cry.

She sniffed. It would be dawn soon. It was always darkest before the dawn. As a pony who loved darkness - as, perhaps, the only pony to truly love darkness - she welcomed dawn. At least, partially. The coming of dawn meant the setting of the moon, the place she had lived on for centuries. It was, for all intensive purposes, her home.

Yet she thought of love once again and idioms she had known. Home is not your own residence, but the place your heart resides. It is where your… love is. That was why she wanted to be loved. All she wanted was to belong; so she asked herself another question in the darkness behind her eyes, or perhaps the darkness that surrounded her very being.

What did she truly love?

Darkness. That was the very first answer. Luna loved the night. But nighttime cannot truly be a home; it is a hiding spot. It was a place she could cry; nighttime was a refuge, and nothing more. Love is mutual, and the night could not love her back. She could only love its hollowness. She could only love the nothing.

What else could be the home of the princess of the night? She didn’t know. She belonged nowhere but in the darkness; in the night, she was alone, but alone was not bad. Was it?

Yet the loneliness of night was crippling. Nopony loved her as they did the light. Nopony adored her as they did her sister. Nopony could see the worth or value of her, just as they missed the worth and value of the stars that burned helplessly in the sky. They were just meaningless fireflies with names. Was that all she was? A meaningless blip who was meant to be forgotten, oh so many years ago?

Who could love darkness as she did? Who could love her, the pony of darkness?

Celestia.

Luna opened her eyes. Celestia. That is where she belonged. She would always belong beside her sister.

After all, it’s always darkest before dawn. Her sister was light eternal; she was everything Luna was, but in the other part of Luna’s powers. She was the light; Luna herself was the balance.

But besides that, Celestia had always loved her. All the cake eaten, secrets shared, time spent… Luna had spent so long in the darkness, she had forgotten the joys of the light. Her sister had been joyous. Laughter filled. She had been loved, and gave love freely in return. Why hadn’t she realized sooner?

She stood, her tears falling under her. Celestia would always forgive her. Celestia gave her what the night never could; what Nightmare never could. Love. She gave Luna a home. A family. A heart and a place for her love to go.

Celestia would not see the imaginary blood on Luna’s hooves. The blood would dry. Celestia would cry in joy upon seeing her sister, and Luna’s heart would soar like the wind in a sail. What the world thought of her mattered not, if Luna had her sister. Everything would be alright with her sister again. Everything would be alright when she was home.

When she was with Celestia.

“Let it be known,” Luna cried out as loud as she could, looking down on the world she had left behind as she had sought home, nearly 1000 years ago. “Let it be known that the pony you call Nightmare will return! The night will return and light will balance its temper! You can doubt and hate me, but I know that no matter what it takes - even if I must call upon the stars to aid my escape from this nightmare - I am coming home! Do you hear me, dear sister?!”

The silence around her seemed to fill her ears. Space held no sound. She smiled, however. Celestia would forgive her. Celestia would love her, with all her heart. Home was where the heart is, and she had left her heart in her sister’s hooves. “I’m coming home,” she whispered. “Tell the world, sister.”

She collapsed, sobbing, onto the surface of the moon. From joy or fear or any mix of emotions, she could not tell where the tears came from. Perhaps, she might guess, from love. “I-I know your kingdom… our kingdom awaits... we shall create harmony, sister… You will forgive my mistakes, I’m sure of it…”

She curled up as best she could, trying to relax as she had tried for 1000 years. Her tears stained her fur darker. She sniffed, smiling, her heart aching with longing and fear and sorrow and every emotion that belongs to love. “T-Tell the world,” she whispered again. “I just want to come home…”

She shut her eyes, her crying lulling her to a fitful sleep. “Please sister… I just… I just want to come home…”

Author's Note

Based on https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k84QxVJd0tI

It's still a bit rough around the edges. Doesn't help that I wrote this quite late at night xD