Honest Fictions

by Thunder Ice

Rating: teen
Tags:
Length: 2512

Ever wanted an honest trailer of a fan-fiction? Well, look no further!

A parody of Honest Trailers, writers will present to you the most honest chapter of all kinds of pony fan-fiction ever created!

Now before you enter this story, be minded that there are spoilers. Don't say we didn't warn you. :)

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2015-06-17 22:39:38 UTC

Honest Fiction: Promises

THE FOLLOWING IS AN

HONEST FICTION

I Am The Night ORIGINAL PRODUCTION

Chapter by Twilight is the BEST

Coming this late spring, is a story with the weakest title ever that will touch your heart, about a mare helping an innocent filly that needs a new home.   It was so good that the author made an un-related story called “Three Gems and a Scooter” that was about a mare helping an innocent filly that needs a new home.

"Promises"

In a time when Scootabuse was beginning fade, Rainbow Dash learned a cliche secret that Scootaloo is being beaten by her mother’s boyfriend Lightning Strike,

Scootaloo took a deep breath. “My mom’s new coltfriend moved in with us a few months ago. At first it was okay, but then he started… he... started… hitting me...”

who later is killed by Rainbow Dash.

Rainbow let out a snarl and kicked Lightning as hard as she could with her other leg. The force of the kick sent him flying away from her, continuing his frantic flailing as he plummeted toward the unforgiving ground. The cloud floor closed up behind him, but Rainbow still heard a thud, followed almost immediately by a sickening crunch.

  and the only way Rainbow can stop him by technically foalnapping Scootaloo,

“Rainbow Dash, you are under arrest for foalnapping. You will hand over the filly and come with us,” one of the guards said

and having Twilight do all the work with her political threats.

Twilight let out a derisive laugh at the mention of the word authority. “Very well then, who's authority would you like me to get? How about that of your commanding officer? I believe that would be Captain Shining Armor, I just call him Shiney because he’s my brother. But no, let’s go even further above your head. How about his wife Princess Cadence? Did you know she used to be my foalsitter? What about Princess Luna? She could certainly order you to let Scootaloo stay at Rainbow’s house. We’re not related, but I did save her from Nightmare Moon, so she kind of owes me a favor.” Twilight raised a hoof and gave an expression of having an idea. “Or, better yet, we could just take this straight to the top and just ask Princess Celestia. It wouldn't be a bother at all for me, Princess Twilight Sparkle and former protégé of Princess Celestia, to contact her and get a speedy response. So I’ll ask you one more time, Captain: is it going to be a problem if Scootaloo stays with Rainbow Dash until this mess is sorted out?”

and other things like creating a nation.

“We’re not in Equestria.  As of ten seconds ago, this cloud and anything on it has been declared the sovereign territory of Dashville. And this,” Twilight held up the parchment now bearing Rainbow’s signature, “is a signed non aggression pact between Equestria and Dashville.” She handed it over to Lightning Strike for inspection. “You will notice that it has been signed by representatives from both Equestria,” she pointed to herself, “and the sovereign republic of Dashville. So, unless you are authorized to start a war on Celestia’s behalf, you will order your guards to stand down at once,” Twilight finished her explanation with a smile.

then creating more nations.

“Hey Twilight, wanna swing by Rarity-opolis later?" Rainbow said in between bouts of laughter.

Twilight tried and failed to contain a second round of giggling. “Sure. Maybe a delegation from Pinkie-town can send us some cupcakes for our summit.”

and it is revealed that Rainbow can predict the future.

Twilights laughter caused Rainbow to laugh even harder, “and of course we’ll need a representative from Apple...loosa to join us.”

“There already is an Appleloosa.”

“New Appleloosa then.”

“New Appleloosa it is.”

200 years later in Fallout Equestria

I gazed over the railing at the walled village.  Multiple lines of what I had realised were railroad tracks converged into a town made up largely of dozens upon dozens of virtually identical homes built from old passenger cars, many of them stacked two or three high.  Most still had their wheels.  Heavy metal boxcars formed a ring around the town, with a massive gate on either side.  Armed pony guards walked around the tops of the boxcars, keeping their eyes on the wastes outside.  Inside, scores of earth and unicorn ponies trotted about their daily lives.  The place was dirty, rusty… and altogether wonderful!

  And after collecting enough evidence and proof to finally bring Lightning Strike to court,

Scootaloo trembled as she raised her left leg. Twilight’s horn again flared up.  The filly let out a sharp wail. This time a faint line began to glow just under the recess between her leg and her body.

“Cracked rib,” Twilight whispered.

that turned out to be pointless because Rainbow kills the stallion.

Rainbow let out a snarl and kicked Lightning as hard as she could with her other leg. The force of the kick sent him flying away from her, continuing his frantic flailing as he plummeted toward the unforgiving ground. The cloud floor closed up behind him, but Rainbow still heard a thud, followed almost immediately by a sickening crunch.

  But Lightning will have none of that and goes to her house

When she got there she saw Lightning Strike standing in her living room with murderous intent glowing in his eyes.

with a necklace that has him walking on clouds

He was wearing a combat bandolier and that same necklace that she had seen him wear the first time he had been in her house: a silver wing pendant attached to a simple silver link chain. Rainbow again surmised that that necklace was the only reason Lightning Strike could stand in her house without falling through the floor.

that can easily get ripped off.

Rainbow reached for the silver wing around Lightning’s neck, and as her vision started to go black, she felt the smooth chain in her hoof.  With her last remaining bit of strength she twisted the chain and pulled as hard as she could.  As soon as the clasps broke, the magic that allowed Lightning to defy the laws of physics ceased to protect him.  He began falling through the cloud as a panicked look ran across his face.

Couldn’t he just cast a cloud walking spell on him?  After what seemed like it was all over for the two,

With a smooth motion, he bucked Rainbow off of himself, sending her flying backwards until she hit the floor, the impact causing her body to scream in pain.  Her vision went black for a second, and when she looked up, Lightning Strike was standing over her with a hoof pressed against her throat. He began to slowly apply pressure, and Rainbow could feel her throat close as she gasped for air. She grabbed the black hoof cutting off her air supply, and tried to pry it off her throat, but she was too weak.

she pulled the necklace off and he was know grabbing a hold on Rainbow,

He wrapped a hoof around Rainbow’s leg and looked up with desperation as he clung to the only thing preventing him from plummeting to his death.

who then kills him in the most unsatisfying death.

Rainbow let out a snarl and kicked Lightning as hard as she could with her other leg. The force of the kick sent him flying away from her, continuing his frantic flailing as he plummeted toward the unforgiving ground. The cloud floor closed up behind him, but Rainbow still heard a thud, followed almost immediately by a sickening crunch.

Oh come on, the stallion deserved worse than dying,

As soon as she left the house, Rainbow looked down and saw Lightning Strike lying on the ground; a pool of blood was forming around his head and his legs were splayed out at unnatural angles. He wasn’t moving.

Seriously couldn’t he have been thrown in prison then get raped in the showers!  Then after that epic moment, comes a custody battle for Scootaloo,

“So you think that giving Scootaloo whatever she wants is what’s best for her?”

“No. But she’s pretty upset, and I can’t say that I blame her.”

For the first time since Rainbow had met her Misty’s calm veneer started to crack. “I don’t need you to tell me I made a mistake.  I know I messed up, but that doesn’t give you the right to take my daughter away from me!”

“I’m not trying to take her away; I’m just trying to look out for her.”

Or that would’ve happen till Misty Skies propose the same ending of Air Bud.

“I’m not going to call FPS.  I would like to talk to Scootaloo, though.  If she still wants to live with you after that, then I won’t stop her. Does that sound fair to you?”

It is also revealed why she didn’t believe her daughter.

“You loved that monster?”

Misty shook her head.  “No, I didn’t,, but I loved the idea of being in love.  I was in love once,” she gestured over to the picture of the red stallion holding Scootaloo above his head,  “Clear Skies was the most amazing stallion I’ve ever met.  He was so amazing that he was able to convince me that we should name our daughter Scootaloo.” She chuckled softly at her own joke. “He was warm and funny, enthusiastic and caring. I know everypony says this about their special somepony, but I truly believe I married the best stallion in all of Equestria.  Scootaloo may look like me, but she gets her personality from him.  When he died, I thought that I would never love again, and I was okay with that because I had a taste of the real thing.  But, then I met Lightning Strike, and for a moment, just one moment, I thought that maybe I could have that feeling again.  And I let that hope blind me to what was really going on.  I don’t expect you to understand.”

  Well at least she’s better than Bella.  And as Rainbow is sleeping, she dreams that she killed Lightning Strike again,

Suddenly, she noticed Lightning Strike hanging onto the edge of the cloud, but he didn’t look like she remembered him. He was scared, a terrified look plastered on his face. She was powerless to control herself; it was as if somepony else was moving her body for her.  She could only watch helplessly as she kicked Lightning Strike off the cloud, and laughed a cruel hate-filled laugh as he fell into the all consuming blackness.

then for some reason kills Scootaloo.

Scootaloo ran toward her and she kicked the little filly off the cloud as well, laughing ruefully as she too was consumed by the night.

  That makes no sense till number one princess came and explained why,

“Why am I having this nightmare? I killed Lightning Strike, and I protected Scootaloo.  Why am I still scared?”

“A wise pony once wrote, ‘Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.’ You do not fear that you can’t protect Scootaloo. You are afraid that you are capable of hurting her.”

That sorta makes sense?

“Scootaloo,” Rainbow whispered knowingly. “You’re saying I need to talk to her about what happened. But what if she ends up being scared of me?”

  You killed the stallion that been abusing her for months, why would she be scared of you?  She would put you higher on her pedestal.  When talking about the Air Bud ending with Scootaloo, she begins to cry… again.

“I’m sorry.  I don’t know why I’m crying... all I’ve done is cry for the last few days.  You must think I’m really lame,” Scootaloo said

  Don’t worry, the Scootaloo in “You Will Never Be Alone” cries just as much as Spongebob.  So the day of wether Scootaloo will stay with Rainbow Dash or Misty Skies finally comes,

Scootaloo climbed on Rainbow’s back and held on just a little tighter than usual during the flight to her mother’s house.

after what felt like less than five minutes, Scootaloo chooses Rainbow Dash.

“Why don’t you run upstairs and see if there’s anything you want to take with you? I’m going to talk to Rainbow,” Misty said to Scootaloo in a soft tone.  Scootaloo wordlessly nodded and went upstairs.

“Does that mean…?” Rainbow asked once she was alone with Misty.  Misty nodded, her eyes watering.

And after choosing to be with Rainbow Dash, she then talks about not being with Rainbow Dash.

“I’m here, and I feel like I should be happy, but I’m not, and I know this isn’t fair to you, because you shouldn’t have to take care of me, but I don’t have anywhere else to go.” She paused for a moment before staring intently at the ground, “I’m a terrible filly... none of this would be happening if I could just forgive her.”

But after a sisterly moment, and a bit of humorous threat,

“Would you rather go live in your clubhouse?” Rainbow said trying to lighten the mood a little.

“That’s not funny,”  Scootaloo mumbled.

“I think it’s a little funny,” Rainbow smirked. The smirk quickly disappeared only to be replaced with a more serious expression.  “How about you let me worry about what my job is? Right now, I say that my job is to take care of my little sister, because that’s what sisters do.”

They hug together and from then on they lived with each other happily.  Until “Keeping your Promises”.

Starring…

Brused Chicken

Taste The Rainbows MotherF@#$%&

Alicorn Mary Sue

Who isn’t actually a Mary Sue

Should've Been Raped In The Showers

Bella Swan

If she actually cared a s@#% about others

Promises

“I have met Captain Strike.  His heart is indeed dark.”

“Then why can’t you tell Celestia that he needs to be locked up?”

“I cannot judge a stallion by the content of his heart alone.  There are many who walk among us with dark hearts. If they struggle against their nature, who am I to deem them failures?  My own heart was black not so long ago. Every night I battle against my dark side, and every night that I resist its calling, the shadow that it casts grows smaller.  Perhaps one day it will cease to exist altogether.”

“You think Lighting Strike wants to be good?”

“Sadly, no. A heart that dark seeks no light; it seeks only to devour the suffering of others. But alas, I am prohibited from interfering in the affairs of Equestria’s citizens in the manner you have described.”

  Wait couldn’t Luna just take Celestia and some other officials into Lightning Strikes Dream and see the memories of the times he abused Scootaloo?  Wouldn’t been a lot easier that way to have him raped in prison.