A Master of Deceit

Remiel gave a soft moan of discomfort as he slowly began to rouse from his slumber. His eyes parted and a blurry world filled his eyes. He moaned in annoyance. If this was going to become a regular thing then he was going to lose his mind within a week. He tried to sit up, but stiff joints and broken ribs prevented that. Then he remembered the pain pills he had been given. He reached into his pocket and fished out the bottle of miraculous drugs. He pulled out the bottle, removed the lid, and took out a single pill.

It was fortunate he was used to dry swallowing pills as there was nothing to drink in this...Come to think of it, just where exactly was he? For starters, he was lying on a rather large bed with lavender blanketing and pink, how much more could his masculinity suffer?, semi-transparent curtains surrounding him. He sat up on the bed, which he begrudgingly admitted was far more comfortable than his own, and made his way towards the end, moving the curtain aside to get a better look at his surroundings.

The room was massive, and lavishly decorated, even more so than his own. He never understood why people wanted such luxurious bedrooms when all they were going to use it for was sleeping. It was excessive, pointless, but not unappealing to the eye. The carpet appeared to be a soft purple color, the walls a darker shade of purple, and had swirls of pink in it. It was strange color coordination in Remiel's opinion, but not an atrocious combination. Yet why did it seem so familiar? He dismissed it and continued his examination of the room. Along with the pink on the bed and walls, the cushioning on two chairs that sat in front of a dark purple stone fireplace. Though one was turned so that it's back was to him, between them he could see a small table that appeared to be covered in several books.

No, he mentally snapped at himself. You have more important things to do than sitting back and reading a book.

Though the books may contain something useful, an unbidden thought rang out.

And how is that? he asked himself. I doubt there's a 'How To Get Back To Your Dimension For Dummies' here.

After all the insane things you've seen here anything is possible. That was surely true enough. Remiel mentally pouted.

You just want to read a book from a different planet.

Don't look at me, his thoughts fired back, you're the bibliophile that's arguing with himself. Remiel was silent a moment.

I'm not a bibliophile, I'm a scholar. Besides, who else would I argue with? No one else poses a challenge.

Touché, was the response. But it hardly resolves our predicament. Remiel's thoughts were silent for a time.

Powers be damned, those books may be about magic. He couldn't help but smirk at his own antics. This was surely a sign he was losing his mind. He was surprised it took this long. Finding his cane beside the bed, he rose to his feet.

Allowing his curiosity to get the better of him, Remiel pushed aside the mystery of where he was and approached the small table. As he did approach, he noticed that the fireplace was lit. Who leaves a fire unattended? he wondered to himself. He turned his head from the flames and refocused on the books. It had been so long since he could simply relax and read a book. Just as he reached his hand out to grab the book on the top, he saw something in one if the chairs move. He looked over and his eyes went wide as he saw a very familiar pony sitting in the chair, staring back at him with just as much shock.

He had seen this pony before. His heart skipped a beat as he saw her crown and the amethyst necklace. She was one of the princesses! What was she doing here? He was so shocked that one of the princesses was right there, it took a moment for him to realize that his hand was resting on something warm and soft and furry. At that moment his mind froze, refusing to comprehend anything that was happening.

"Y-You're awake," the princess said, speechless. Remiel could only nod in return, still too shocked to speak. "C-Could I please have my hoof back?" If Remiel's mind wasn't fried before it was now, but at least he could react.

"I'm so sorry!" he gasped out as he discarded his cane and went to one knee, bowing his head. "I-I didn't know you were here, and I saw the books so I." His flustered state had him so unbalanced that it spurred another coughing fit. He fell on his elbows and both knees as he tried to contain the bloody aftermath.

"Are you alright?" he heard the mare gasp out, sounding both frightened and concerned. He heard footsteps racing towards him as comforting hands were placed on his back and shoulder. "Should I call for the doctor?" Remiel adamantly shook his head 'no' as he waited for the coughing fit to subside. Finally the pain and coughing passed and he was left breathless, panting heavily. "Are you alright?" Remiel nodded his head.

"My sincerest apologies, Your Majesty!" he managed to gasp out. "I-I didn't know you were here!"

"Calm down!" she all but shouted, sounding just as flustered as he was. ""You need to calm down before you start coughing again!"

Says the crazy pony shouting at me! Remiel thought coldly.

"We need to get you back in bed," the princess, Princess Twilight Sparkle if he remembered correctly, said in a hurried, panicked voice.

"Your Majesty," Remiel started, by was cut off as the mare continued to rant.

"Oh, I should have been keeping an eye on you, not reading some horrendously unhelpful books," she panicked.

Hey, don't blame to books, he thought, offended on behalf of the books in question.

"What if your attack had been worse and I was so wrapped up in reading I didn't notice?" Ok, she was really starting to get paranoid. She honestly reminded Remiel of how the younger members of his family get get so worked up over something they wouldn't even pause to breathe. Unfortunately, his solution was the same as what he did for them. Without even thinking, he moved to a sitting position and with his left hand flicked her right in the middle of her forehead, hitting the base of her horn. "Ow, why did you do that?" Horror washed over Remiel as he realized what he had done.

"I-I'm so sorry!" he gasped. "Y-You were just going into hysterics and that's how I'd calm down-" The princess fixed him with a hard stare.

"I was not hysterical," she stated, sounding offended. For once Remiel couldn't keep his tongue on a leash.

"Yes you were!" he objected.

"Was not!" Remiel gave her a flat stare.

"Pointlessly rambling off hypothetical situations that hadn't happened isn't going into hysterics?" The princess' face flushed slightly.

"Well excuse me for worrying about you," she retorted. Oh no she wasn't. She was not trying to guilt him into feeling bad.

"I was trying to tell you I was fine, but you couldn't hear me over your little panic-attack."

"Stop saying that!" As their voices rose their faces slowly began to inch closer, as if they were each trying to get the other to back down through physical intimidation.

"I said 'panic-attack' not 'hysterics'!" Remiel roared in his defense.

"They're the same thing!"  the princess fired back.

"Ugh, why are you being so difficult?"

"Difficult?! Me?! I was only trying to help you and then you hit me and started yelling!"

"What?! I didn't hit you, I flicked you. And you were the one that started yelling, not me!"

"Was not!"

"Were too!" If only Remiel had been thinking clearly, he would have realized how childish this argument had become. In the moment though, all he cared about was proving he was right.

"Well," the princess huffed as she climbed back to her feet, "it looks like you're fine now, so I'll leave you alone to rest." Remiel took her abandoning the argument as a victory and reveled in it. It was only when she stormed out of the room and slammed the door did he realize what he had done. Horror and anger washed over him as realization dawned on him.

"Stupid!" he cursed himself as he got to his feet, grabbing the cane. He made his way to the door as quickly as his shaky legs could, hoping he could still catch her before it was too late. Just as he went to turn the knob on the door, it opened on its own accord. Hoping it was the princess, he quickly began to apologize as he went to one knee. "I'm so sorry, Your Majesty. I-I don't know what came over me!" An uncomfortable silence was the reply. Finally he heard a heavy sigh.

"What am I gonna do with you, colt?" a familiar, masculine voice asked. He looked up and saw Stalwart standing there, his head shaking, a weary smile on his lips. "Let you out of my sight for not even a day and you're making princesses storm off from their own room."

"S-Stalwart," Remiel stammered, feeling slightly embarrassed. It took a moment for what Stalwart said to fully register. Her room? This was her room? Idiot, of course it's her room, why else would she have been there? Stalwart merely shook his head again.

"Alright, colt, on your hooves," he said, reaching his hand out towards Remiel to help him. "Princess Twilight is on her way to the throne room to meet with the other princesses." A cheeky smile appeared on his face. "I came to see if you were up yet, but it looks like I was late for the show." Remiel couldn't help but physically shake at Stalwart's joke. He was honestly surprised at what he had done, and how he had done it without thinking. He never acted without thinking. It wasn't in his nature. "Hey now, it was just a joke. No need to be trembling like that."

"I can't believe I did that," Remiel said, mostly speaking to himself. He had all but secured his pardon and then he goes and basically assaults one of the princesses. It was perhaps the most callous and stupid thing he had ever done. At the very least it was the second. He shook his head, he couldn't dwell on that now. He had to think of a way to salvage the situation.

"Why don't you tell me what happened while we walk?" Stalwart suggested. Remiel nodded his head. The guard's insight could prove most useful. So Remiel detailed the events that transpired and Stalwart did his best not to laugh as they made their way to the throne room. After Remiel told him everything that transpired Stalwart couldn't help but chuckle and shake his head. "The things you get yourself into, colt."

"Yes I'm a complete moron, we've established this," Remiel replied, frustration clear in his voice. "Now how do I fix it? I never meant to flick her it just happened."

"Don't worry about it too much," the guard replied. "Princess Twilight gets worked up really easy, but she always calms down just as fast. She'll come up to you soon enough and apologize to you for how she acted and then you apologize for yelling and," he snorted a little, "flicking her." Remiel gave him a disbelieving look.

"In my world royalty have sentenced people to death for less," he answered. Stalwart gave him a surprised look.

"That's what you were expecting?" Remiel nodded his head, then let it hang.

"Then again, perhaps that is what I deserve for what I did," he said softly. Stalwart instantly stopped walking and grabbed Remiel by his shoulders.

"Don't you ever let me hear you talking like that again," he said, all joking gone and replaced by a hard, serious glare. "You did nothing wrong. You did what you had to to save your life." Remiel couldn't help but smile on the inside while on the outside he refused to look Stalwart in the eyes. If all else failed he could pull the pity card to save his own skin. He didn't want to have to rely on that trick though. It would wear off with too much use.

"You're right, I'm sorry," Remiel replied. Stalwart nodded his head, satisfied, and released Remiel from his hold.

"Now, I have a surprise for you up ahead," he said, his upbeat tone returning. Remiel gave him a puzzled look.

"What kind of surprise?" Remiel questioned. Stalwart just gave him a grin.

"The kind that's a surprise," he replied.

Smart-ass, Remiel thought coldly. Still, what kind of surprise awaited him up ahead? Stalwart led him into the throne room's waiting room, and his eyes went wide when he saw who was waiting there.

"Remiel!"

-----Inside The Throne Room-----

-----Moments Earlier-----

Celestia sat upon her golden throne, her face calm and serene, but inside was naught but turmoil. At the foot of the three thrones was a loyal member of her Day Guard, and one who had been inside Crimson Sky's compound for months now. The guard's name was Deep Cover, but his alias was Steel Sword. He had told her numerous things that Crimson Sky had done that made her coat crawl with disgust, but the most earth-shattering statements came when the guard told her about Remiel and the things he had done.

At first she couldn't believe what she was hearing. The Remiel she had met the day before and the one she was hearing described now were complete opposites of one another. It was inconceivable that they were even discussing the same being. The Remiel she had met seemed like a lost, scared foal while Deep Cover painted him as a criminal a few shades lighter than Crimson Sky. In some regards an even worse one.

"Are you certain that you are remembering him correctly, lieutenant?" Luna asked from her throne beside Celestia. The guard nodded his head.

"It is hard to forget the things he's responsible for,” Deep Cover responded.

“But you are claiming that Remiel, who is little more than an ailing foal, is a criminal on the same level as Crimson Sky.”

“I don't know what he is,” the guard replied, “but helpless and frail is not a possibility.”

“What do you mean?” Celestia asked.

“He is intelligent, ruthless and very cunning. He went from being a prisoner to a confidant within hours of arriving at Crimson Sky's manor. He put himself in a position where he was protected by a powerful and wealthy slaver. Had he kept the status quo, he would have wielded incredible wealth and influence, but instead he began laying the groundwork to destroy it moments after gaining Crimson Sky's trust. He played hardened criminals like they were foals. He was so good at what he did, he could have taken over the operation right under Crimson Sky's nose, but he didn't.”

“Isn't that something he should be commended for?” Luna asked. Deep Cover shook his head.

“His goals may have been in the right, but his actions were anything but. Crystal Clear for example. She joined him because he threatened to harm her sister, whom Crimson Sky had given to him as property. Storm Chaser joined because Remiel had learned he was stealing some of the crystals and was selling them when he went on trips to other towns and threatened to expose him to Crimson Sky.” Deep Cover paused. “Needless to say, that would have been a death sentence.” It would have been an understatement to say this revelation made Celestia uneasy.

“So they joined him because of extortion?” Luna asked, horrified. He nodded his head.

“But then why didn't they expose him when we questioned them?” Celestia asked.

“He gained their assistance through threats, but he won their loyalty though his actions,” Deep Cover explained.

“What do you mean?”

“While we were waiting for his plans to develop, a few of us ran into serious problems. Myself included.”

“What kinds of problems?” Celestia asked.

“For me, I became sick days after joining Remiel's group. Crimson Sky controlled his subordinates with an iron hoof. If you couldn't work then you were a liability, and liabilities had a habit of disappearing.” Celestia didn't have to think hard about what likely happened to those who ‘disappeared’. “I told Remiel right away and within an hour I was assigned to his security detail. After that I could recuperate in his room without Crimson Sky ever finding out.” Deep Cover was silent for a time. “He saved my life.”

“But you question his motives,” Celestia concluded. He nodded his head.

“When I asked him why he told me that I was an asset but I was worthless to him if Crimson Sky made me disappear.”

“So he was looking after his own interests,” Luna concluded. Deep Cover had a troubled look on his face.

“I'm not so sure,” he replied. The princesses gave him curious looks. “If any of our small group had any kind of trouble it was resolved with little effort on our part. Remiel acted cold and indifferent towards us, but he always seemed interested in our troubles and they always went away after we told him about them. I asked him about it, but he claimed that he was too busy to be dealing with such trivial matters.”

“So you think his cold demeanor was an act?” Celestia asked. Again Deep Cover seemed conflicted.

“I honestly think everything about him is an act,” he confessed. “He plays the part that will be most beneficial to him in any given circumstance. In fact, I think I only ever saw one real emotion from him.”

“When was this?” Deep Cover took a deep breath.

“One day while Remiel was doing Crimson Sky's accounting, Gentle Touch burst into the room. She was hysterical, crying and some of her clothing had been torn near her chest.” The implication was not lost on the two princesses. “Remiel got to her even before I could, comforting her and asking what had happened. She had told him that three of Crimson Sky's thugs had attacked and tried to have their way with her.” Deep Cover was silent again as he seemed to swallow his own words.

“What happened?” Luna asked, her own rage beginning to leak through.

“Faster than I could believe, the concerned look in his eyes was gone and replaced by this...darkness is the best way to describe it. His face went blank as he got the names of the perpetrators then rose to his hooves and marched to the door like he was on a mission. He told me to watch over her and left the room. That was when Gentle Touch's sister, Crystal Clear, barged in and demanded to know what had happened. Remiel told her to go to her sister and that he was going to take care of it.”

“What did he do?” Celestia asked, almost demanding.

“The next day those same three ponies were gone and nopony saw them afterwards, but when he came back to the room I swore I heard him whisper to Gentle Touch that he kept his word.” Celestia and Luna both wore stricken expressions.

“He killed them?” Celestia asked finally.

“It's more likely that he had Crimson Sky do it,” Deep Cover answered. The throne room was silent for a time, each pony with their own thoughts.

He proves to be a ruthless and manipulative creature and at the same time a protector who would do anything for those he feels responsible for. Just what are you, Remiel? A criminal or a savior? Celestia was having trouble just trying to determine her own opinion of the human, it was almost impossible to rule on whether he had committed any crimes. There was a strong possibility he had committed several crimes, but there was no evidence to prove he had. If she were to take this to trial she doubted there would be enough proof to convict him, and that wasn't taking into account him manipulating the judge with his act. Whatever she did, she would have to keep a close eye on him and his actions.

“Lieutenant,” she said, breaking the silence in the room. The guard snapped to attention. “In your opinion, does Remiel pose a threat to our citizens?” Deep Cover thought it over carefully.

“There is certainly the possibility,” he said finally, “ but if I had to go with my gut, I'd say ‘no’.”

“And why is that?”

“If he truly harbored malicious intent, then he would have taken over Crimson Sky's operation, not tear it down. I think his goals reside solely in finding a way home. To what extent he'll pursue that goal I couldn't even begin to guess. That being said, I don't see him pointlessly harming innocents. Or even with good reason.”

“Why?”

“When the guards stormed the manor all the servants were gone. They had fled into the forest the moment the ponies at the mine had been freed. Apparently, Gentle Touch had been responsible for that.”

“So Remiel had them evacuate knowing nopony would be able to pursue them in the chaos while also protecting them from being caught between the criminals and the guards,” Luna summed up. “A brilliant idea.”

“Still,” Celestia interrupted, “it doesn't explain whether Remiel was truthful when he told us what happened when he took Crimson Sky's life. Judging from what you told us it seems likely he was not forthcoming with the truth, but then how do we explain his injuries?”

“Is it possible that they were self-inflicted?” Luna asked. Both Celestia and Deep Cover seemed mortified at the thought. Could he have done that to himself? Celestia couldn't imagine a pony or any creature willing to inflict such pain upon themselves.

“I don't think so,” Deep Cover replied. “He's almost obsessed with returning home. I don't think he would jeopardize that with such grave injuries.”

“Why is he so concerned with returning to his home?” Luna asked.

“I don't know,” the undercover guard replied shaking his head. “It seems to be the only thing he cares about, though.”

“And how do you know this?” Celestia asked.

“There were a few times I overheard him when he thought I wasn't paying attention. He said something about time running out, but I don't know what he was talking about.”

“Could he be referring to his ailment?” Luna asked. “He told us it wasn't a terminal illness, but it's clear he's not as truthful as we had thought.” Celestia pondered on that. Was his illness the reason for his seemingly desperate plight to return home? It seemed reasonable, but Remiel was a completely different type of creature. His motivations could be something that no pony could ever understand.

“But why would he lie about something so grave?” Celestia asked. “We may be able to find a cure for his condition.”

“Very true,” Luna responded. “Then there may be something happening at his home.”

“Or it could be as simple as wanting to see his family,” Celestia added, massaging her temples. Truly, this Remiel was a headache just thinking about him.

“I don't think anything about Remiel is simple,” Deep Cover replied.

“Regardless, this doesn't make what we should do about him any clearer,” Celestia said, moving the conversation along.

“What can we do?” Luna asked. “There is a high probability he has committed several serious crimes, but there is no way to prove one way or the other.”

“I agree,” Celestia responded. “No matter what we do, we should keep him under close surveillance.”

“Then I may have a suggestion,” Deep Cover offered.

----Outside The Throne Room----

To say Remiel was worried would be an understatement. How had they transported his co-conspirators here so quickly? And they had already been interrogated? Things could not be any worse.

“What's wrong?” Dark Shadow asked quietly from his side. Stalwart had left to tell the princesses that Remiel was here but he wasn't taking any chances with several guards still nearby.

“There is a spy amongst us,” Remiel answered.

“How do you know?”

“How else would you explain our small band of misfits being brought here so quickly? I only just told the princesses and the hospital staff about you yesterday.”

“And we arrived this morning,” Dark Shadow added. “Isn't it possible that somepony just told the guards about our group? What about that letter you sent the guards?” They were both good points, but Remiel debunked both of them effortlessly.

“Perhaps,” Remiel answered. “Still, they would have waited for me to wake up and confirm those sources. Besides, there's one I've been suspicious of for some time.”

“Steel?” Dark Shadow asked. Remiel nodded his head, slightly unnerved by the pegasus reading his mind. “So I'm not the only one that thought something was off with him.”

“Of all of you, he didn't require any...incentive to join us. Also, he never seemed to fear the repercussions of his crimes. Not to mention his overall demeanor.”

“What do you mean?”

“I'm a liar,” Remiel confessed, pride in his voice. “Not some ordinary or even an exceptional liar. I am the best liar that was ever born. Not only am I capable of deceiving anypony about anything but I can tell when somepony else is lying, and everything about him reeked of a lie. He's good, one of the best I've ever seen, but I'm in a whole other league.”

“So what do you wanna do?” Remiel gave the stallion a wicked smirk.

“Even if he tells them everything, and even if he pieces together that I murdered Crimson Sky it's irrelevant. He has no proof to get me convicted of anything, and should something happen to our group I will see you all released soon after. No matter what I must do.”

“What do you need from me?”

“Names. Give me the names of everypony that deals in smuggling, dirty guards and officials I can bribe and whomever deals in selling secrets.” Dark Shadow nodded his head and quickly ran through a list of names and what they were. Remiel knew how to play this game, and he suspected Equestria had no clue. He was the puppeteer, and he would make this whole damned country his marionette if he must in order to get what he wanted.

“That's everypony I can think of,” Dark Shadow said finally. “Is this really going to help?” Remiel nodded his head.

“Whether it will be necessary is another matter,” he answered. “I still don't know what the princesses know, but when you're betting it all it's wise to have a few extra cards up your sleeve.” Dark Shadow grinned slightly at that.

“Most ponies would call that cheating,” he said in an amused tone. Remiel returned the smirk.

“Most ponies have naive impressions of fairness,” he answered. “I have no such delusions.”

“I knew there was a reason I liked you,” the stallion replied. Remiel chucked despite himself. Now that that part of the conversation was over Remiel allowed his voice to grow louder to a normal speaking tone.

“How has everypony been treated?”

“Good enough, I'd say. Gentle Touch was kept with the rest of the staff from the manor while we were put in chains. Once they brought us here, though, they took em off. Not like we'd be able to do much damage with all these guards here I suppose.”

“So they think,” Remiel answered coldly, his voice lowering once again. Dark Shadow gave him a curious look. “All you need to defeat somepony is to learn how low they are willing to sink and then go even lower. Prove that you are able and willing to do worse than they are and they will fold every time.”

“Really?” Remiel pondered it for a moment.

“Perhaps not the first pony you try it with, but prove yourself there and everypony afterwards will fall in line.”

“Why do I get the feeling you've done that before?”

“Because I have,” was the cold, wicked answer. Remiel often despised himself for the evil he was willing to carry out, but he knew that it was the only way.

“I won't ask for details,” the black pegasus replied.

“That's for the best,” Remiel answered, his smile making a sudden reappearance. “Now, I wonder what's taking them so long.”

“Remiel,” a soft voice came from behind. He turned, and immediately dropped to one knee, the others in his group doing the same.

“Princess,” he said with as much reverence as he could, “please forgive me for my earlier misconduct. I wasn't thinking clearly and allowed my tongue to outrun my mind. I accept any punishment you deem fitting.” He didn't dare look up from the marble floor as he waited for her reply.

“D-Don't be ridiculous!” she sputtered out. “I-It was just a small argument, nopony needs to be punished!” He looked up and saw that she was flustered again. “B-Besides, I should apologize as well. I overreacted and kinda freaked out without meaning to.”

“Your kindness is inspiring, Your Highness,” Remiel replied, sounding almost devoted as he lowered his head again. “It is also undeserved. I was out of line. The stress of the past few days has caused me to become impatient and irritable. However, that is no excuse for my actions when you were only expressing concern for my wellbeing. Still, I can only hope that you can find it within yourself to forgive me for my mistake and allow me a chance to make amends.” The response was not what he was expecting. An exasperated sigh escaped the princess’ lips.

“I already said it was fine didn't I?” she asked, sounding tired. Remiel looked up and saw that while she seemed to have gained most of her composure, there was a faint blush on her cheeks.”We were both wrong and overreacted. So why don't we just forget about it and start over?” Remiel couldn't believe how generous this princess was.

“I would be honored,” he answered. Princess Twilight Sparkle gave him a warm, kind smile.

“With that settled, how are you feeling?” she asked. Remiel was caught off guard. He honestly wasn't used to kindness from his fellow royalty. Even when the other royalty knew he was as well. It was a pleasant change.

“Much better, Your Highness,” he responded warmly.

“Um,” she said, sounding very uncomfortable. Remiel gave her a confused look. “Can everypony please stand up? It's uncomfortable having a conversation with everypony kneeling.” Remembering to lean heavily on the cane, Remiel slowly rose to his feet. Dark Shadow even used his hands to support Remiel. It was pleasant having somepony who knew how to play the game on his team. He thanked Dark Shadow for his assistance and when he turned back to the princess she was now standing mere inches away from him. Remiel didn't have to fake jumping in surprise, or his knee suddenly locking up and causing him to begin to fall. Fortunately Dark Shadow caught him, as did a second pair of hands. He looked, and saw the princess holding his left hand with both of hers.

To say he was shocked would be an understatement. The princess tried to catch him? How could she be so benevolent? And her hand. It felt so soft and warm. Wait. Where did that thought come from? His thoughts were disturbed by a voice.

“Are you sure you're alright?” the princess’ voice asked, her face showing her concern. Remiel quickly gathered what wits hadn't abandoned him.

“Y-Yes,” he managed to stammer. “Apologies, Your Highness. You simply startled me and then I felt light headed.” The princess suddenly looked very bashful.

“S-Sorry, I didn't mean to surprise you, I was just worried you were hurt,” she replied.

How? Remiel thought to himself. How can she be so kind? She's royalty, she should be placing herself atop a podium and demanding that commoners bask in her royal presence. No, she must be angling for something. But what? There's absolutely nothing I have to offer her. Perhaps-

“C-Can I please have my hoof back?” The princess asked suddenly. It was then he realized that he had slipped into another one of his mental debates and was still clutching her hand and that her cheeks has a soft pink color to them.

“A-Apologies, Your Highness!” he replied hastily, releasing her hand. He tried to ignore the sensation of numbness sinking into his hand. What was wrong with him? Stress. Yes, that had to be the answer.

“D-Don't worry about it,” she said with a slight blush. Remiel quickly tried to reign in his thoughts. He couldn't afford to be off his game. A misstep here and everything could unravel. Fortunately, the sound of the large doors to the throne room opening saved him from causing any further damage. All heads turned to see Steel Sword and Stalwart walking out of the throne room. Stalwart was a few steps behind Steel, a wary eye locked on him. It was fairly convincing. Even Remiel would have been fooled if he wasn't already suspicious. Stalwart saw Remiel and he saw actual joy in them.

“So, Rem,” the white stallion said ad he walked over to Remiel's side, “you apologize to the princess for acting like an idiot?” To say he was surprised by the guard's lack of tact in front of the princess would have been a woeful understatement.

“S-Stalwart!” the princess gasped, apparently just as shocked as Remiel. “You don't have to be so mean!” Stalwart just laughed at her. He then casually threw his armored arm over Remiel's shoulders.

“Sorry, Twilly,” he replied in a carefree tone. “It's just after hour he was sweating bullets earlier I figured I'd find you two with him with his face on the ground begging for forgiveness.”

Well, you aren't far off, Remiel thought quietly.

“You already missed the show,” he heard Storm Chaser chime in. Traitor. “He was all sappy and asking to be punished then singing her praises when she forgave him.” Remiel felt his cheeks color as he turned away from everyone to hide his embarrassment.

I wasn't thatbad, Remiel pouted mentally. He could see Crystal Clear lean over and whisper something to her sister, an evil smirk on her face. Her sister tried to hold in a laugh. Remiel felt his face burn even hotter. There would be a reckoning for this. He swore he would bring down fierce retribution on their heads.

“C’mon, Rem,” Stalwart said, giving him a small shake, “it's nothing to be embarrassed about. Keep acting like that and ponies might start to think you have a crush on somepony.” if his face was simply burning before it felt like an inferno now. That caused a fit of laughter to spread among the ponies.

“Stop being a bully, Stalwart,” the princess said sternly. “Remiel's been through enough without you making things worse.” Ah, at least there was somepony on his side. Unfortunately she was also a part of the conversation so her defense of Remiel only added fuel to the fire that was laughing.

Oh the hell I will reign down upon you all, Remiel thought darkly. He wasn't sure how he would get his revenge, but it was sure to be something that would inspire fear in even the Devil's black heart.

“Aw, just trying to get the colt to lighten up,” Stalwart told the princess, no doubt wearing that cheeky grin of his. Remiel liked the stallion, he really did. That's why it was going to hurt when Remiel reaped his vengeance. He finally managed to get his haywire emotions in check enough to look everypony in the face.

“Are you alright?” the princess asked, honestly sounding concerned. Remiel gave her a soft smile and nodded his head.

“Yes, thank you,” he replied. “I was simply light headed for a moment then my knee decided to give it on me. Sorry for the fuss.”

“Wait, what'd I miss?” Stalwart asked.

I fell when I was trying to stand,” Remiel explained, having the state of mind to look embarrassed. “Thankfully Dark Shadow was there to steady me. Still, I'm sorry for the trouble, everypony.”

“Ah, don't mention it, colt,” Stalwart said, finally removing his arm. “Though I'm betting you wish it was some attractive mare who caught you, eh?” He wiggled his eyebrows making it clear to whom he was referring to. Remiel decided to reply to that one.

“Honestly Dark Shadow proved to be enough,” “he replied casually. “After all, I imagine anypony would qualify as being more attractive than you.” Then, like a group of school children, Remiel's group of reformed criminals ‘ooow’ed. He has never heard adults do that before. Stalwart dramatically acted offended.

“I'll have you know I'm the most handsome guard in the princesses’ royal guard!” he replied in a mocking hurt tone.

“Ah, I find that hard to believe as many of them surely have found somepony willing to date them or even marry them.”

“How do you know I haven't?”

“Have you?” Stalwart didn't answer right away, apparently not anticipating this turn off events.

“The princesses are are expecting you,” he said suddenly, trying to sound official. “We shouldn't keep them waiting.” Again it was Storm Chaser that chimed in.

“That means no!” he declared loudly and everypony, save Stalwart, began to laugh. Even Remiel allowed himself a small chuckle.

“It would be a shame to limit this much good looks to just one mare,” Stalwart said, trying redeem just a little pride.

“Yes, in the same way winning the lottery or ridding yourself of a bad rash would be,” Remiel said smugly. Stalwart gave him a shocked expression and Remiel had thought he pushed it a little too far. Then the stallion smiled broadly and out his arm around the human again.

“Colt,” he said still smiling. “You and me are going to get along just fine.” Remiel returned the genuinely returned the smile. “Alright, in all seriousness though, we shouldn't keep the princesses waiting.” Remiel nodded his head and allowed the stallion to lead him towards the throne room. Remiel would soon fave his judgement, but he had only one thought in his head.

What's wrong with me?