An Odyssey

Ooooooh didn’t you never see my baby get home!

Ta-ttaaaa-da-dam.

Didn’t you never see my baby get home?

Ta-ta-da-ta-tam. Tadam. Tadam. Tattadadadam. Tadam. Tadam.

I’m sayin’, didn’t you never see my baby?

Aaaaah, we didn’t never see you baby get home!

Oooooh, where did you see mah baby?

Tam. Tadam. Tadam. Tattadadam. Tadam. Tadam.

The baby, oh yes, my baby, she walked into the bar. Tadam. Into the bar she walked, Celestia be my witness. Tadam. Tadam. Oooh, my baby, she walked into the bar. Tadam. Tadam. Oooh, into the bar she walked and ordered gin. How much gin? Oh, my baby, she ordered the whole cup. The whooole cup. Tadam. The whoooole cup. Tadam. Tadam. The very same cup - tadam - tadam - that she ordered ten years ago. Tadam. Tadam.

What happened ten years ago? Tadam. Tadam. Oh, that’s when mah baby said yes. Tadam. Tadam. Tell me, what happened ten years ago? Tadam. Tadam. Oh, my baby, she said, yes, she said yes she will yes. Tadam. Tadadadadam. Tadam. Tadam. And who did she meet there, your baby? Tadam. Ooooh, my baby, she met Daisy the flower mare.

Oooh, you baby, what did she said to the flower mare? What did you baby said to the flower mare? Ah, ma baby, she said, hello Daisy the flower mare! What did she did she said she said to the flower the flower mare? Ah, I’m tellin’ you, she said, hello Daisy, hello Daisy, she said, hello Daisy, Daisy the flower mare.

Oh, it was maybe five o’clock in the evening, and she can’t even close her eyes. No, she doesn’t wanna close her eyes. What does she want, then. Ooh, my baby, she wants a gin, yes, she wants a gin. And Daisy the flower tadam tadam? Oh, she took a whisky already, it’s fine. Tadam. Tadam. Taddaaddaadam.

So then, tadam, tadam, how’s it goin’ with Daisy the tadam tadamare? Tadafine, thanks, tadactavia, gulp gugulp gugugugulp. That gin, tadam, it’s otherworldly, tadam tadam. The whisky too. Tadam. Tadam. Oh, if Discord made whisky - tadam - he must’ve made my baby too. Oooooh, if Discord made whisky - he must have made my baby too. Tadam. Tadam.

So what’s my baby gonna do now tadam tadam? Oh, my baby, she’s gonna drink her gin. Tadam. Tadam. No, I mean what’s she gonna do after that? Tadam tadam. Oh, my baby, she’s gonna perform. Tadam. A concert then? Tadam tadam. Yes, Daisy you’re right, it’s a concert and I’m gonna tadam.

Tadam. Tadam. Tadadadam.

Tadam. Tadam. Tadadadam.

So you’re finally getting paid then, Daisy the flower mare asked. Tadam. Oh, what did Daisy the flower mare ask? Tadam. Tadam. You’re finally getting paid now ain’tcha, Daisy the flower mare asked. Ooooh, you’re finally getting paid now, ain’tcha, Daisy asked. So you getting paid? Tadam. Tadam. Ah, yes, I’ll make those nasty bastards pay me, tadam tadam.

What did my baby say to Daisy the flower mare? Tadam tadam. That she ain’t gonna be patient no more. How come? She said she ain’t gonna be tadam no more cause she gonna make them tadam tadam her shiny bits tadam tadam what she deserves!

Tadam. Tadam. Tadadadam.

Tadam. Tadam. Tadadadam.

So she’s gonna have a gin and then perform? I didn’t hear ye! I said, is she gonna, tadam tadam, have a tadam and then tadam? Ooooh yes, everypony knows that tadam tadam without a tadam ain’t no tadam tadam tadam. Tadadadam. Tadam. Tadam. Tadadadam.

But Daisy the flower mare heard that mah baby may have a problem with drink! Tadam tadam. What did you say, Daisy the flower tadam? I just said, tadam tadam, that you may have a problem with drink, s’ what I hear, tadam tadam. Is that what you heard, Daisy the flower mare? Tadam. Tadam. Oh yes yes yes that’s what I hear tadam tadam sorry Octavia tadam tadam. Who did you hear it from, tadam tadam? Ah, that don’t matter, tadam tadam, No, who did you hear it from?! Tadam tadam! Ah, I heard it from Vinyl the DJ.

WHAT?!

Tadam tadam. Tadadadam.

Tadam. Tadam. Tadadadam.

WHO did you hear it from?

Tadam. Tadam. Tadadadam.

Tadam. Tadam. Tadadadam.

I told you, I heard it from tadam tadam! Tadadadam, It’s not my fault that tadam tadam talked tadam about tadam. Tadam. Tadam. Tadadadam.

It’s fine, I’m calm, tadam, I’m super tadam. That Vinyl, tadam tadam, such a, uh, tadam friend. Tadam. Runs her tongue where- tadam. tadam. tadam. Not what I meant. Tadam tadam. You must tadam, she’s tadam tadam when she tadam tadammed tadam a tadam. Tadam. Tadam. Tadadadam.

Oh, of course I tadam it, tadam the tadam tadam said. I tadam tadam it perfectly. Tadam. Tadam. Not that I ever tadam the tadam of tadam tadam tadam. Tadadadam.

That’s fine, my baby says, tadam tadam. Oh, my baby, she drinks the full cup, tadam tadam. Goodbye Daisy the flower mare, mah baby said, tadam tadam. It’s time for my tadamerformance. Tadam. Tadam.

Tadadadam.

Tadam. Tadam. Tadadadam.

Oh, didn’t you never see my baby get home?

No, we ain’t never seen you baby get home!

Tadam. Tadam. Tatadadatadadatadadatadada-

Dam.