Chaos and the Apple

by Evowizard25

Rating: everyone
Tags: Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Other, Romance, Comedy, Discord, Applejack
Length: 8634

A series of events surrounding the new couple {Discord and Applejack}

Discord and Applejack are in love.

That's good.

Now they have to make it work. That's going to take some time, effort, and Applejack learning to restrain the urge to kill.

{A series of drabbles in the day to day lives of Ponyville's strangest couple.}

Published 2015-07-31 17:30:01 UTC
Last updated 2015-11-16 01:05:42 UTC

Thinking of the Date to come

It just didn’t feel right. It was an ordinary day. Ordinary chores. Ordinary meet ups with my best friends. Ordinary pep talks with my baby sister and ordinary Big Mac not sayin’ much. Today was just so ordinary. Why? Shouldn’t somethin’ really strange happen, or just...somethin’?!! Ah grit my teeth as ah bucked an apple tree in agitation. This shouldn’t be an ordinary day. It can’t be. Not with what’s goin’ on.

Not when ah’m about ta go on my second date with Discord.

Ah...ah still can’t believe ah’m datin’ the spirit of chaos. He caused us so much pain and torment, but he’s changed now. He’s nice and sweet. He’s stupid and reckless. He wants to be with me. Why? Ah’m just Applejack. He just does, because he likes bein’ around me. Ugh, why are my thoughts swirlin’ so much? Just buck up, Applejack. He’s yer coltfriend now. Ain’t nothin’ gonna change that, unless he does somethin’ really stupid.

Ah paused at that thought. Of course he’s gonna do somethin’ stupid. That’s one of the reason’s ah like him. Not love him...Not yet. Ah don’t want to go that far and say it. Even though he makes me feel special and loved. Even if my heart races like a jackrabbit in spring when ah’m around him. Even if ah want to kiss...Argh! Ah buck the next tree even harder. Ah needed to get rid of this anger and frustration. Ah was gonna buck Discord at this rate.

He’d probably make a joke of that.

It’d be a funny joke. Ah don’t know why though. Ah didn’t like him before last week, but now ah can’t think of a life without him. Ah can’t be this clingy. Not yet. Just cause he spent a week wooin’ me. Just cause he saved my life. Just cause he danced with me and made me feel special. Okay, ah know why ah feel this way, but it’s too soon to be this wantin’...Isn’t it?

“Nerves gettin’ the better of ya, Applejack?” Ah heard Granny speak up behind me.

Ah sighed and turned to look at her. “How’d ya guess?”

“Doesn’t take one of those spiffy scientists up in Canterlot ta guess what’s eatin’ ya,” Granny Smith tilted her head to the trees.

Ah turned to look and quite a few of them had hoof sized dents in them. Ah blushed in embarrassment and chuckled nervously. “Yeah, well, been a rough day is all. Nothin’ ta worry about.”

“Uh-huh,” Granny was givin’ me one of her looks. The look that said ‘Don’t try and be difficult with me’. “Ah know how yer feelin’. Felt the same way when ah was datin’ yer grandpa the first few times.” She sighed, a smile tuggin’ her lips. “He was a good stallion. Dependable, loyal, and not nearly as hard headed as us Apples.” She chuckled. “Just don’t be as difficult as ah was. Gave him more headaches most ponies get durin’ Cider Season.”

Ah snorted in good humor, crackin a smile. It was honestly nice to see Granny happy about those memories. It wasn’t always so cheerful when she remember grandpa. She sometimes just went into her room to be alone. Guess ah caught her on a good day. Lucky me. “Yeah, but this is Discord. He ain’t like grandpa.”

“No,” Granny shook her head. “Discord’s a little more wily than he was, but that don’t change the fact that he is still a stallion...or whatever they call his newfangle race. So stop yer mopin’. Things are gonna be alright.”

“Ah am not mopin’,” ah snorted and got back to work. “Ah’m fine.”

“Yer not fine,” Granny narrowed her eyes at me. “Yer agitated. That won’t do ya a lick of good on yer date. Ya might drive him off with that attitude.”

Ah rolled my eyes. “He’d just teleport or do somethin’ wacky like he always does….” Ah smiled as ah thought about what he’d do. “He’d get me all frustrated and then try to cheer me up. Thinks ah’m cute when ah’m flustered.” Ah smashed a tree extra hard, showin’ just how agitating that varmint could be. “He’s a nuisance sometimes.”

“That he is,” Granny nodded. “He’s also yer coltfriend, so start treatin’ him like one and get yer caboose in gear. That date of yers is today, missy.”

“Why’s this so important to ya, Granny?” Ah asked. Ah turned around and stopped buckin’. Ain’t polite to keep yer back to a relative. Well, there was that one time, but Apple Bloom should have known better than tell all those stories. Yes, ah know about Diamond Tiara’s blackmail, rotten filly she is, but Bloom coulda told me ‘bout it and saved us all from the pain. “It’s my coltfriend,” felt weird sayin’ that. “And it’s my date. Ah don’t think he’s gonna get uppity if ah’m late. Probably just come on over and bug me when he gets bored.”

“Because ah see how happy he makes ya,” Granny softened her gaze and put a comfortin’ hoof on my shoulder. “He save my granddaughter. Ah can’t thank him enough and….” She started tearin’ up. “Ah can’t imagine what ah’d do without ya in my life.”

Ah couldn’t help but tear up to. Ah couldn’t imagine my life without Granny or the others. Ah couldn’t imagine seein’ them grieve over me. Ah didn’t want to. That would be cruel. Ah turned around and pulled Granny into a hug, careful not to hurt her. “Don’t know what ah’d do without ya too, Granny.”

“That and ah want some great grandkids,” Granny pulled back, givin’ me a wide smile. “Hop to it. Ah ain’t gettin’ any younger.”

“GRANNY!” Ah shouted, blushin’ up a storm. My cheeks were blazin’ with how strong it was. Discord and me? Havin’ kids? No way. No how. He wasn’t gettin’ in my bed. He’s still a varmint. He’s my coltfriend too, but he’s more of a varmint type.

‘Is he good in bed?’

Get yer sorry hide out of my head, ya stupid voice! Ah ain’t thinkin’ dirty thoughts about Discord. Even if he’s kind of cute in his own way. His fur so soft and warm….His paws touchin’ the right places….Gosh darn it to Tartarus. What the hay is wrong with me? Ugh, ah’m just gonna get this date over and done with.

_________________________________________________________________-

“Does this hairstyle make me look fat?” Discord asked, wearing an afro.

I giggled seeing my friend all flustered like he was. I haven’t seen him like this since he first started talking about Applejack. Well, like a marefriend really. Not that he didn’t talk about her before, but...it wasn’t exactly nice or that much. I’m glad they worked out their differences. They made a cute, if strange, couple. Not that I would ever call them strange. Oh dear, I better apologize to them both for thinking them strange for feeling the way they did. Should I do it at the same time, or one at a time.

‘Fluttershy, you’re being silly again.’

I sighed inwards, giving myself a quick sorry.

“No, no, no.” Discord shook his head, returning his mane to his usual style. He growled and started pacing up and down in the air. “This is frustrating. I’ve been on a date before. I’ve fought Celestia and Luna. I’m the bleeding god of chaos! I’m older than your entire race and look at me,” his body broke down into puzzle pieces. “I’m falling apart because of a second date.”

“Now, now,” I smiled down at my friend. He was almost as dramatic as Rarity at times. I say almost because, honestly, I don’t think anyone can be as overly dramatic as her. I’m sorry to think that, but she would make a good actress though. I took a puzzle piece with most of his face on it and pet it. “Don’t be upset,” in a flash, he was whole. His head was in my lap as I pet his head like I would pet Angel Bunny. They were both alike, if you thought about it. “Applejack is probably just as nervous as you.”

“Oh I know,” he grinned, scooting farther into my embrace. He was like a big puppy at times...which he just turned into. I squeed and hugged him, causing him to laugh. “I’m irresistable, my dear. Anyone would be nervous about dating me.” He frowned. “What I don’t get is why I’m still nervous.”

“Because you want her to care for you and you’re afraid you’ll mess this up,” I bluntly put it.

“Since when are you a love expert?” Discord peered up at me curiously.

I blushed in embarrassment. “Well...umm...you see….I read some of Rarity’s novels when I have the chance.”

“Ah,” Discord nodded. “I see. I’m guessing she has quite the collection.”

“More or less,” I said. I didn’t want to give it away, but it is kind of obvious. Rarity is my oldest friend, besides Rainbow Dash. She was always kind and always looked out for me. I could appreciate that. She also wanted to help me find my special somepony. It was kind of annoying, because I get so nervous around stallions it isn’t funny. So she did the next best thing after a horrible date that ended up, somehow, wrecking several of Applejack’s barns. They really aren’t built to last. To which she brought me to her secret underground love dungeon…..

I wish I was making that up honestly.

Of course, I could see Discord’s eyes twinkle in mischief. “I know that look, Discord. Rarity’s our friend and we don’t steal from each other.”

“It’s only stealing if I don’t return it,” Discord raised a little puppy paw...Oh so cute~ “GAH!” He squirmed in my hold, but I couldn’t help it. It’s his fault for being a cute, lil puppy.

He teleported out of my grip, his old self again. I pouted in disappointment. No puppy to huggle. He rolled his eyes and snapped his fingers. Then I had a puppy. Life works in strange ways, but hey, as long as I get puppies I’m good. He chuckled. “Now then, I need to find something to wear.”

“I don’t think Applejack’s going ot wear anything to a picnic,” I pointed out.

Discord’s tail shot up and he grinned. “Perfect!”

I blinked in surprise. Why was that….Oh. I blushed and hid behind the cute puppy. Sorry puppy. “Oh my, Discord!”

He laughed, using his tail plush to wipe away the tears that came up from laughing so hard. “Oh my dear friend, you are so easy to tease. Well, you all are so easy, but you are the cutest one.”

“What about Applejack?”

“She’s the funniest and sexiest one to tease...Well, sexiest really.” He tapped his chin. “Sparklebutt Bookhorse is loads of fun to mess with. All I need to do is change the bindings of her books and make them do the can-can and she goes ballistic. Just one prank and-” He chuckled, spreading his fingers and a shower of miniature Twilight Sparkle cutie marks shot out from his hands. “-boom goes the bookhorse.”

“That wasn’t very nice,” I narrowed my eyes at him. “Twilight is our friend. Name calling and pranking her like that aren’t funny, especially if you do it all the time.”

“Ponko and Rainbow Pride do it all the time,” Discord shrugged. “They get away with it.”

“That’s because they know when to stop,” I sighed. Rainbow Dash had a habit of going a bit too far though. That’s just how she is, really.

“Well Ponko is a really fun mare to hang out with,” Discord lamented, tugging at his mane that was now pink and poofy. “She’s scaringly powerful though. Even I have to question how she does things and I’m the god of chaos, spirit of mayham, and all sorts of other things.”

“She’s Pinkie Pie, don’t question it.”

“I’m Discord,” he bowed. “I coined that phrase. She probably just grew up with a little warp or friendship tinkering. Either would do and I do sense a bit a bit on her. Now Rainbow Pride on the other claw,” he took off one his paws idly as he waved it about. “He’s a bit too rough around the edges.”

“Don’t you mean ‘she’?” I corrected his grammar.

Discord blinked in shock. “RAINBOW’S A MARE?!!”

I sighed. I pitied Applejack deeply.

Author's Note

Well everyone, I promised there would be more Applecord to come. I hope it's as good as you were hoping for and that you enjoyed this chapter. Please leave a comment. They really help to get me writing more. :twilightsmile:

Lunch In A Tree

Ah can’t believe ah’m fussin’ over my hair this much. Ah ain’t like Rarity. It’s just hair. Yet, ah can’t help comin’ it and lookin’ at it in the mirror. Was it good lookin’? Did my fur not shine bright enough? Should ah go get Rarity to help? Gah, why do ah care if my fur shines enough or not? Discord wouldn’t care. He loves me for me, but what if he losin’ interest in me? He wouldn’t….

Ah gotta comb my hair again. Argh, why was this so frustratin’. Yes, this was the first time ah’ve dated someone. He wasn’t like those stallions who only cared for looks. He chose me because...well, he chose me because an apple fell on his head. Yeah, not the most reassuring reason he started wooin’ me. He still loves me though. Ah can tell. Ah just didn’t know if ah loved him though. It was happenin’ so fast. Ah liked him. Ah really really liked him. He made me feel so wanted. Is that love? Ah wanted it to be. He made me happy. Well, when he wasn’t playin’ the part of a blasted varmint.

That’s when ah heard somepony knockin’ on my door. Ah walked out of the bathroom and looked at my bedroom door. “Yes?” The knockin’ started up again, ‘cept it wasn’t comin’ from my bedroom door. Ah frowned and turned my head. It was comin’ from my closet. “Huh?” Ah trotted over and quickly opened it. “Discord? What are ya doin’ in my closet and what’s with yer mane?”

It was indeedy the blasted varmint ah was fussin’ about not a moment before. Maybe he’s a mind reader and heard me. He’d have a lot to make fun of if he did and it’d explain a thing or two about his antics. Right now though...Ah don’t think he did. He had this thousand yard stare on him that beat any ah’ve seen before. HIs mane was….it was...Rainbow Dash’s? Couldn’t be anypony elses. “What the hay are ya wearin’?”

“Dashie’s mane,” Discord said in a sort of mechanical way as he walked past me. Ah gave him a concerned frown when he just laid back on my bed.

“The real one’s?”

Discord nodded. “I...I’ve come to a shocking realization about our prismatic friend.”

“So ya stole her mane?” Ah narrowed my eyes. Discord always did come to the stupidest decisions. Well, not always stupid. He realized he liked me after all.

“Switched actually,” Discord twiddled his thumbs and stared at the cielin’. Ah didn’t like how out of it he seemed. “I just wanted to get inside her head for a bit.”

“So switchin’ manes helps ya understand her?” What is in that varmint’s head?

“Isn’t it obvious,” Discord lifted his head with a smile. “If one is to understand another, they must walk a mile in their hair.”

“It’s shoes, Discord. It’s ‘walk a mile in their shoes’.”

“But she never wears shoes….” Discord tapped his chin, causin’ a different sound each time. “Nor do most of you ponies. Why come up with a phrase that barely applies to you? If you can’t walk in their shoes, then obviously you should have come up with something personal. A mane is personal. Everyone has a mane...well, unless you’re bald.”

“Ya know she’s gonna be mad at ya, right?” Ah asked as ah climbed into the bed with him. Normally ah wouldn’t do that, especially with this varmint. Never, but he’s my coltfriend and...ah’m fallin’ fer him harder each day.

Ah yelped in surprise when he pulled me close and started runnin’ his claws through my mane. Couldn’t keep the blush from my face, sadly enough. “Of course she will. She doesn’t like me in the first place.”

“If ya stopped doin’ things like this, she might let go of a bit of that hate.” Ah glared up at him. Hopefully, he’d grow some common sense soon.

“Where’s the fun in that, my dear Applejack?” Discord purred and nuzzled the top of my head, causin’ me to squeak in embarrassment. He just chuckled at my attempts to get away, the blasted varmint. “Until she can learn to not be so wound tight, I will prank her like no one has ever been pranked before. Well, until I get bored.”

“Yer a blasted varmint,” ah grumbled.

“And you’re a cute waifu,” Discord laughed, before sitting up. He carried me around with one arm before he tore up some of portal in the air. “Now, on to our date. I picked the perfect place for us. You’re going to love it.”

“Are ya goin’ to wear Dash’s mane through it?” Ah quirked an eyebrow.

Discord rolled his eyes, which caused Dash’s mane to roll around his head and back again. ‘Cept, by the time it reached his head, it was his own mane this time. “I didn’t see what was so wrong with it. I thought you two were friends? Wouldn’t you want to date a guy who reminded you of a friend?”

“Ah...ah just don’t get you sometimes,” ah huffed, just done with him fer the moment.

He laughed before walkin’ through the portal. It closed behind us, leavin’ us in some meadow with a bunch of tall trees surroundin’ it. He broke off a nearby branch and it quickly turned into a picnic basket and he started off.

“Whitetail Woods?” Ah asked, just wantin’ to make sure this is where he carried me off to.

Discord nodded. “I wanted this date to be somewhere personal.”

“Personal?” Ah tilted my head in confusion. We never did anythin’ together in these woods. Hay, none of my friends either. We had enough trouble with this guy in town.

Discord didn’t say anythin’ until we came to a small clearin’. His tail thumped the ground four times, before his thinkin’ tree sprouted upwards from it. He hopped up, bouncin’ from branch to branch. Ah’m just lucky ah don’t puke easily, or this might have been a bit much. Then he stopped and put me down. “This is where the apple hit my head. This is where I realized that you,” he booped my nose. “Were the lucky one.” He put a little beany hat on my head that had the number ‘1’ on top.

Ah blushed when he said that. This was it? This was the place that started it all and he...he wanted to share it with me? He really wanted to share his thinkin’ tree...this very moment in time with lil’ ol’ me. Ah...ah….

Discord rubbed a paw across my face, wipin’ away a tear ah didn’t know was there. “Shh, no tears. Only picnic baskets and trees.”

Ah chuckled at the stupid comment. He gave me a calm smile. Ah don’t see that one often, so…ah nuzzled him. “Thank ya. Just...thank ya.”

“Don’t thank me yet, my dear Applejack.” Discord’s low rumblin’ chuckle shook his chest. “You haven’t even tasted my cooking yet.” He ‘poofed’ into a waiter outfit, opened up the picnic basket, and stuck his whole arm into it. He pulled out a blanket and quickly laid it out before us on the large branch. Foods of all sorts popped up from the checkered blanket. “Would you like a cherry danish, my lady.” He stood up and bowed before me.

Ah rolled my eyes. “Did ya really just cook ‘em, or did ya just ‘poof’ ‘em here like ya do most everythin’.”

Discord shrugged. “It’s pretty much the same thing really,” he held up a hand to stop me from replying. “I do know how to cook, my dear Applejack. Celestia taught me that well enough.”

“Princess Celestia taught ya to cook?” Well that was somethin’. Maybe it was part of his reform thing.

Discord nodded and pulled out a picture from out between his fingers. It was a pink haired Celestia and a really young Discord holdin’ up a cake. They were covered in eggs, flour, and all sorts of things and they looked frazzled, but they were happy anyways. Like me and Apple Bloom when ah was teachin’ her to cook. Heh, she wasn’t nearly as bad as when ah was learnin’. At least she didn’t almost burn the house down. “It was one of her activities when she babysitted.” He gave the picture a warm smile.

It was a strange smile when ah thought about it. It’s not like ah haven’t seen it before, when he’s talkin’ to me or Fluttershy. It’s just...this was Celestia he was talkin’ ‘bout. They were enemies. She sealed him away fer a thousand years and she was his babysitter? Should ah really question this? Chrysalis is his sister after all. Stands to reason that his whole life is built around random and strange connections, but what happened to make them enemies. They seemed to really like each other in that picture. Almost like family if’n ah had to put it.

He cleared his throat and bent over the food, with a fork and knife in hand. “Large or small?”

“Large,” ah grinned. “We Apples have quite the appetite.”

“I can tell,” Discord’s eyes looked me up from head to tail, restin’ on my rump. Ah blushed and used my tail to hide it as best as ah could. His grin grew wider. “I like the look. You should let your hair down more often.”

Ah scowled. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Ah forgot to bind it. Ugh, now he’s gonna make fun of me for it. “Ya surprised me. Ah wasn’t ready fer the picnic and-”

A clawed finger rested against my mouth and he deadpanned, “Shut up a little. I didn’t mean to offend, joke, or whatever you were about to go on about. I genuinely think it’s cute. No pranks. No tricks.” He pulled his finger back. He shot me a challengin’ grin. “Unless you’re up for some of those things.”

Ah snorted. “Not today, thank ya kindly. Just pass me the grub.” The fork and knife Discord had summoned moved on their own. Kind of like they did when we went to that lunchin’ after this varmint was set loose. Crazy critter tried to mess with my farm. Ah still want to buck his face in fer that. ‘Course, can’t do that now. Mare’s don’t buck their coltfriend….well, not unless they do somethin’ really stupid. He was gonna, no doubt about that, so he’d get what was comin’ to him one day.

Cuttin’ me a fair share of a danish, they put it on a plate and carried it over to me. Puttin’ it before me, they bowed. “For the mistress of chaos.” They said in shrill voices.

Ah blinked in surprise. Didn’t see that comin’. “Mistress of chaos?”

Discord grumbled and shooed the utensils away. “Chaos spirits and whatnot tend to get carried away with their titles. You don’t want to know half of the titles I have. I doubt I could say some of them even if given a week to do so, but they have a point. I am the god of chaos and since we’re dating, you’re the mistress.”

“And what does that make Fluttershy?” Ah quirked an eyebrow.

“The caretaker,” Discord’s grin was warm and a little nostalgic. Kind of like when ah’m rememberin’ somethin’ about home. Like Apple Bloom’s first word: orange.

Granny threw such a fit that day. HA! Definitely a gut buster right there.

“She gave me a second chance that I never earned,” Discord snorted in amusement. “She’s too good for her own good. It’s going to get her in trouble one of these days.”

“It’s a good thing she’s got friends like us to help her if’n that happens,” ah put in. Nobody hurts my friends. Not if ah could help it. Ah took a bite into my food and...oooh~ This is good….not as good as apple danishes, but that’s just my family’s blood talkin’.

Discord laughed. He had a hearty laugh, even if there was a certain ‘mad’ flare to it. It’s actually kinda comfortin’. “You’re right about that, my dear Applejack.” He tossed a pie up into the air and swallowed it whole, tray and all.

“Just Applejack,” ah said. That title was gettin’ a little old. Well, not really. Ah kind of liked it, but ah’m just Applejack.

“Fine,” he grinned and took off the beanie hat he gave me. He quickly turned it into a badge and put it on my chest. It said ‘Just Applejack’. “Just Applejack. Hmmm, a fitting name.”

Ah rolled my eyes and threw away the badge. “Yer a cheeky varmint, ah’ll give ya that much.”

Discord moved a paw up and took off his mane like a hat as he gave me a mock bow. “Glad to be of service, Applebutt.”

Ah glared at him. “Okay, go back to the first one.”

Author's Note

I hope you all enjoyed this chapter and please leave a comment. They really do help. :twilightsmile:

Mono-Genders Are So Mainstream

Ah can’t remember the last time ah was so happy while buckin’. Maybe it was just a few weeks ago, but there was something different this time. Somethin’ that made me feel like ah was glowin’. Can’t put my hoof on it really. It’s just that ah ain’t so stressed ‘bout everythin’. It’s just me and my work and ah was fine with that. At least, right now. It was family game night.

That and, well, Discord was supposed to come over. He promised. Ah reckon he’s why ah’m so happy. Darn varmint’s tryin’ to butter me up fer somethin’, but ah don’t care. Not really. Ah still want to buck him to kingdom come, but ah was thankful he won me over. He just made me feel pretty and wanted in the ‘special somepony’ sense. Never felt this before. It’s strange.

That’s when ah heard his strange humming from afar. Ah had to smile at the random country tune. Speak of the daemon and he’ll appear. That’s what my granny always said. Well that and ‘Don’t feed trolls. They’ll just keep comin’ back fer more.’ Never met a troll ‘fore. Don’t plan on it.

Now normally ah’d go up and greet anyone walkin’ in my orchard. That’s the neighborly thin’ to do, but my coltfriend prefered to greet me first. Ah didn’t have a problem with it. Gave me just a bit more time to ready myself. Callin’ him my ‘coltfriend’ still feels odd and this whole thing might take time to get used to. He seemed fine with it and ah really loved that about him.

When ah heard him stop just a couple hoof lengths from me, ah turned around. “Took ya….” My eyes widened as ah saw what he was wearin’. “Why are ya wearin’ a dress?”

Not just any kind of dress. One of those bright pink ‘frou-frou’ dresses my rich cousins usually wear. Kind of like the ones the Appaloosa mares wear, if’n ah remember their ball dresses. They’re alright, but they make dancin’ a bit harder than ah’d like.

Discord just snorted, twirlin’ his pink umbrella in his fingers. “Why can’t I wear a dress? It’s a perfectly good day for one.”

Seemed a bit too hot fer one in my opinion, but this was Discord. His reasonin’s never made much sense to me. Well, sometimes they did but that’s only cause ah have to. He’s my coltfriend after all. “T’was nothin’ against wearin’ it. Ah just….well it’s kind of strange seein’ a guy in a dress,” ah chuckled, shakin’ my head. “But yer a strange kind of guy, so ah shouldn’t be surprised.”

Discord rolled his eyes, but smiled. “Indeed I am and I fear the day I’m not. Normalcy may well be good for you, but for me it would be a death sentence. Besides, a man can wear a dress the same as a woman can wear a suit. I never cared either way what I wore, or what gender it’s made for. I could go either way really.”

Ah nodded. “Sure, whatever suits yer fancy.”

Discord’s grin turned mischievous. “Whatever suits my fancy indeed. I wonder what suits yours.” He stroked his beard, pullin’ out a fan out from his hairs to cool himself off.

Ah quirked an eyebrow. “What are ya gettin’ at?” Ah didn’t like where this was goin’. That grin of his never turned out well fer me. Ah just want to stomp him into the dirt, but he just makes me love him more. How? This ‘love’ thin’ really is frustratin’.

“Well my dearest Applejack,” Discord toss the umbrella behind him, which turned into an apple tree. Thank goodness fer that. The last umbrella turned into a Whompin’ Willow, if’n ah remember Twilight callin’ it that right. Wasn’t fun dealin’ with a tree tryin’ to kill ya. ‘Course he did that before we were together, so ah won’t begrudge him now. “You have no problem with what I wear or how I act. In fact, you seem to think your coltfriend wearing a dress is perfectly acceptable.”

“And?” Ah frowned, narrowin’ my eyes.

“Well,” Discord curled around me, his dress flashin’ into a Sherclop Holmes kind of thin’. He puffed on a pipe, which made pink bubbles. “Obviously that only leads to one conclusion.”

“Are ya implyin’ something’?” Ah growled, stompin’ my hoof. “Just spit it out already.”

Discord chuckled and he placed his muzzle underneath my own. He hummed and nuzzled me, causin’ me to giggle. It felt nice just bein’ close. Maybe he’d forget what he was tryin’ to say. “I’m just saying that this opens up a few doors, if you know what I mean?” His voice was wrong. It sounded so...so feminine.

Ah pulled back to see Discord….but he was a girl. My mouth fell open. “What...What...but…”

Discord giggled, which sounded so wrong now that he was a she. “Cat got your tongue?” He, or she, wasn’t wearin’ anythin’ like he, she, usually did. That didn’t help things.

“Discord, what are ya doin’?”

Discord pouted. “Nothing too drastic. It’s just a sex change is all.” The way she said it was like it meant nothin’ at all to her. The shrug certainly helped.

“Ah can see that,” ah snorted. “But why’d ya do it?”

“Well I thought about how you don’t care if I wear a dress,” Discord pointed out. “Now you see, gender never really meant much to me. Oh I do prefer being male, but that’s just because I was born one. Even with preference, I don’t care if I’m a girl or a boy. There really isn’t much of a difference.”

“And just cause ah don’t care what ya wear, yer a girl?” Ah...but...What goes through that varmint’s head?

Discord nodded. “Of course. Isn’t it obvious?”

“No,” ah shook my head. “No it isn’t.”

“How odd,” Discord tapped her chin, teleportin’ each time she did it. That is, until she was sittin’ by my side. “I thought it would be rather clear to you, but alas, my mind is incomprehensible.” She leaned over me and sniffed. “Oh woe is me.”

Ah rolled my eyes. “Get off me.”

“No,” she giggled and nibbled my ear. Ah yelped and dashed off, givin’ us some space. “Oh come on. A little fun won’t hurt.”

Ah snorted. “Change back.”

“Don’t be like that, my dear Applejack.” Discord purred. She swam in the air around me. “I know you ponies are always nervous when trying new things. I’ll be gently.”

“Could ya stop fer a moment and listen to me?” Ah stomped the ground, shakin’ it. “Stop this nonsense and change back.”

“Oooh~” Discord put a claw to his mouth. “You’re playing hard to get. I like that.” He made a little scratching motion with a paw and a cat noise. “I can fix that.” With that, ah wasn’t in the orchard anymore. Now ah was in a dimly lit room filled with candles and a large bed with...with...girl Discord in lingerie. “Now, how about we get comfortable~”

Darn it, ya blasted varmint! He, SHE, was makin’ me blush from all this. Ah don’t swing that way. He’s an idiot fer not realin’ that. “How about ah buck yer face in.”

“As delightful as that sounds,” she was still grinnin’ at me. “I think I’ve been goin’ about this the wrong way.”

“Ya mean ya will change back?” Ah quirked an eyebrow. That was easy. It usually took a bit longer to get him to do what ah wanted.

“That can be saved for later,” Discord thrust a claw into the air with a lightbulb appearin’ over it. “I’ll simply change you.”

……”Say what?”

Discord giggled and jumped to her feet. She started hoppin’ about, clappin’ her paws. “It’s so simple. I’ll just change your gender and then-”

“NOOOOOOOOO!” Ah screamed and made a dash fer the door. Ah never made it, since ah smashed into Discord’s tail instead. Didn’t hurt really, but it was still jarring.

She laughed and everythin’ seemed to wobble as though it was water. The whole scene changed back into the orchard. “You actually thought I’d change your gender like that?” Discord was a he again from the sound of it. His mockin’ laughter made me see red. “Ohohoho, priceless. Your face was priceless.”

Ah growled and grabbed his tail. Swingin’ it, ah had a bit of satisfaction of seein’ him smash into the ground. “Ya blasted varmint.”

Discord sat up and chuckled. He just shrugged. “What can I say? I love teasing you. Besides, we can always work on it later.”

“We ain’t,” ah marched up and poked him in the chest. “Ah like ya the way ya are, Discord. Don’t change that.”

Discord blinked in confusion. Then he gently brushed his claw across my cheek. Ah couldn’t but lean into it, but ah kept him still with a fierce glare. “And that’s what I love about you. Well, that and how fun it is to tease you as well. Haven’t had this much enjoyment in eons.”

Ah snorted. “Ah’m glad yer havin’ fun.”

Discord kissed my nose, causin’ me to blush and freeze up. “I would never force you into doing anything you didn’t want to do. Never.” He said it with such conviction that ah just had to believe him.

“O-okay,” ah gulped, fightin’ off my blush. Ah hate how flustered he makes me.

“But you have to admit,” he winked at me. “I did look drop dead gorgeous as a woman.”

“If’n ya say so,” ah snorted. Maybe he looked rather pretty. Okay, he was. Ah’m not goin’ to tell him. He’d just keep changin’ into a girl and ah don’t need that complicatin’ our relationship.

“I do say so,” Discord teleported over to an apple tree and tapped it with his claws. All the apples fell into the buckets perfectly. “Now, shall we start?”

“Yer helpin’?” Ah asked. It wasn’t like he never tried to help me. It’s just...it doesn’t usually work out and he always tries to get me out of work.

Discord chuckled. “My dear Applejack, of course I am. I wouldn’t be a good coltfriend if I just let you do all the work. Besides, I have to repay you for all the teasing...Even if you secretly enjoyed it.”

“Did not,” ah growled, makin’ sure he got my message to drop it.

“Perhaps not now,” Discord shot me a challengin’ smirk as his tail split into three and knocked the apples out of three other trees. “But perhaps sometime in the future. I told you I’m not picky on genders.”

Ah shook my head and went back to work. Discord is Discord. Ah have to try and understand him even if ah don’t want to. He was my coltfriend and that meant ah had to put up with whatever he tried. Ah just made sure to remind myself to give him a good buck whenever he came close today.

Author's Note

Sorry for the long wait for another chapter. A bunch of other stuff came up and I had to focus on them. I hope you enjoyed this chapter and please leave a comment.

Don't Forget About the Chimera

Ah’m used to eatin’ with others. Ah’m a family mare, after all. Loud chewin’, burpin’, poor manner, all that stuff and more. Ya’d think ah’d hate it. No, ah love it. Ponies ought to be who they are. They shouldn’t hide behind some masks and pretend to be fancy all the time. So Rarity, bless her heart, can keep her frou-frou stuff. The same for everyone else. As long as a pony kept true to themselves, ah could eat with ‘em just fine.

That didn’t mean everyone would do. Like now, just sitting across from my ‘boyfriend’, eatin’ apple pie. It just feels so strange. This was the guy who tried to take over Equestria a year ago. Now he’s my boyfriend and we’re just eatin’ together? Like nothin’s off about this? This ain’t right.

Now ah’m doin’ it again. Thinkin’ somethin’s wrong. Stupid is what it is. Real stupid, Applejack. Ah sighed inwardly. He just made me so nervous sometimes. This whole thing was just so new. Ah didn’t know what to do. So ah just ate in silence, so did he. Maybe he’s still nervous. He doesn’t show it, but Discord’s good at lying. He turned me into one after all. Ah snorted. He wasn’t like that anymore. It wasn’t right to keep bringin’ that up.

Discord was mine now. Ah’d whip him into shape. Least he’s got an Apple’s appetite. He chowed down like his life depended on it. Slirping up the last one, he patted his extended stomach and burped. “Now that hit the spot. I don’t know how you do it, but your pies are the best thing I’ve ever had. That’s saying something given my mother’s cooking. She’s so good, you’ll go ‘crazy-” his eyes twirled in their sockets. “-over them.”

“Aw shucks,” ah blushed slightly. Why does he keep havin’ to be so nice? “It’s nothin’ special.” Ah took a deep breath. There was a reason ah let him eat in with me today. He wasn’t goin’ to like it.

“Nothing special?” Discord just stared at me like ah lost my mind. “My dearest Applejack, these pies are simply to die for.” He suddenly slumped over and A GHOST him came out of his body. “That’s a fact.”

Ah jumped back a little in my seat in surprise. He just had to do stuff like that, didn’t he? Ah snorted and glare at him. “Don’t do that.”

Discord’s spirit chuckled and went back into his body. He straightened himself out. “I’m sorry. I just can’t help it.” He booped my nose. “You’re just so cute when you’re surprised.” He wisely took his finger off me. “Of course, you’re always cute. My cute, little apple.” He chuckled to himself.

Ah growled, blushin’ harder than ever. “Sh-shut up, ya idiot. Ah want ya to listen up and listen good.” Was ah really gonna ask him ‘bout this? Ah shouldn’t. That beast got what she deserved. That didn’t sit right with me though. Not a bit.

Discord put his hands behind his ears as they grew five times their size. “Hmm?”

“Sweetkill,” ah said, causin’ him to tense up and stop his body mashup. “Is she okay?”

Discord frowned. “I don’t know why you’d ask that. She tried to kill you. If anything, I would think you’d do your best to forget about her.”

“‘Cause ah just don’t like the thought of her sufferin’, alright.” Ah snorted. “Forgive me for havin’ a conscious.”

“She tried to eat you,” Discord narrowed his eyes. “Don’t you remember that? You barely survived. If I hadn’t shown up, you’d be fertilizer right now.”

“Everyone deserves a second chance,” ah said it more to convince myself really. Yeah, Sweetkill was terrible, but ah’m sure there was more to her. Sometimes, she’d just talk a bit about what was aggravating her, or’d lazily lay around the Swamp and say ah wasn’t worth the effort. “We gave ya one.”

“You shouldn’t have,” Discord slammed his fist into the table. My jaw dropped. Did he really just say that. “Ponies have always been so trusting. You want everyone to be your friend so badly you let monsters like me run among you.”

“Yer not a monster,” ah shouted.

Discord just rolled his eyes. “Oh really? Tell me, what did I do the first time I was released?” Ah couldn’t answer him, so ah turned away. Ah really didn’t want to think about ‘that’ day, ever again. “Exactly and that was just me playing nice. I could have done so much worse and I should have. I should have done more to stop you all, but for some reason I didn’t. Call it an influx of insanity, or perhaps it was because I had at least an ounce of sanity left from being stoned for centuries. You can thank Celestia for that. Reading to me every day, thinking I’d change...and doing all these silly voices.” He gagged. “It’s like she still thinks I’m that little kid she used to babysit. I’m a grown up, Celestia!” He shook his fist in the air, a angelic spotlight lit up his frame. “And I ought to be treated as such.”

Ah chuckled. It’s just like him to get off track like that. Ah took his paw in my hoof and smiled up at him. “Ah have to agree with the Princess.”

Discord was in a clown costume, because of course he was. “Do I look silly to you?”

“Ya make it obvious,” ah pointed out. My boyfriend, tickles me pink to think that, scoffed and the costume vanished. “Ah just want ya to undo whatever curse ya placed on her.”

“Why should I?” He crossed his arms.

“No kisses fer a week,” ah smirked when his eyes widened. We haven’t kissed lip to lip yet, but he always got so poofy when ah kissed his cheek or nose. Discord always loved those.

“First it’s no cuddles and tea time from my bestie,” Discord grumbled. “And now no kisses from the missus. What has my life become?”

“Oh just get goin’, ya idiot.” Ah pushed his paw back and glared at him.

“And there’s the Tsun,” Discord grinned and held up his paw. “When I get back, I’ll make sure to kiss that right out of you.” He poofed off.

Ah growled, flushin’ red because of anger. That was it. He couldn’t just kiss me whenever. Not yet, anyways. “Stupid god.”

____________________________________________________________________________

Another plume of fire shot up into the sky next to us and yet, we were getting colder. The first few days were ‘okay’. We could still kill some of the giant rats and the fire kept us freezing. It was getting harder to feel warm now. Our fur wasn’t growing back for some reason and this cloud wouldn’t stop snowing. Maybe I didn’t know how fur worked all that well. My sisters always had fur. I never did. Maybe they’re doing better.

I can feel them shivering just as bad as me, so I think it’s safe to say that isn’t true. It’s harder to move now. My sisters were getting worried. They kept me closest to the fires and I loved them for it. A part of me knew we weren’t going to make it. It’s so cold, it’s hard to speak. The snow won’t stop and fire doesn’t melt it fast enough anymore.

I was about to try speaking again, when we heard something. It sounded so strange, yet so sinister. Was it someone chuckling? If it was, I hoped they stayed far away from us.

“Aww,” a familiar voice spoke from all around. “You’re freezing. Isn’t that a shame.” I shivered in fear. He was mocking us. “You girls were harder to find than I thought you’d be. Though, I wasn’t really trying to find you. Either way, this is your lucky day.”

We all gulped and tried to make ourselves smaller. Maybe he’d just go away. What more could he take from us? No, I don’t want to know what that monster could do. It popped out from the air in front of us and we screamed. It’s horrifying.

The one known as Discord pouted. “I am not that ugly.” He shrugged. “Oh who am I to care what you think. I’m just here to undo a curse and leave.”

“Wh-what?” My tiger sister spoke up. She was always the bravest of us.

“Didin’t you hear me?” Somehow, my tiger’s sister’s ears were those megaphones turned backwards. Discord leaned forward and shouted, “I’m undoing the curse!”

The ringing went through all of us. We just back in shock, while we rubbed our sister’s ears. “Why? You didn’t seem like you wanted to see us, let alone help us.”

“I don’t want to help you,” Discord opened the side of his head and a bunch of small marbles rained down. I know what marbles are from that one pony merchant a few years back. We didn’t get to kill him, since he just teleported away after trying to sell us marbles. Discord clutched them as they rained down. “You see these?” He closed his head back up. “Each one is a different manner of torture I envisioned when I saw you trying to eat my mare.” His grip tightened. The marbles glowed all sorts of colors. “Each one is cruel and unusual in so many ways that not even I can list them.” His grin sent shivers down our back. “This isn’t even including my father’s realm. Oh, I could have just chucked you there and let all sorts of manner of daemons tear you apart for eternity.” He chuckled, which sounded off. “Quick and easy and Applejack wouldn’t be the wiser.”

“Pl-please,” I whimpered.

“Have mercy,” my goat sister spoke up.

“Mercy?” Discord titled his head so much that it twisted around back into a tilt. “Mercy?” His eyes were ablaze with purple fire and… we were small. He grabbed us in his paw like we were just a pup, which apparently we were pup sized now. “Where was this mercy when you tried to eat Applejack, hmm? I know I’m cruel, but I’ve never killed anyone.”

“W-we were hungry,” my tiger sister spoke up.

“It’s true,” my goat sister nodded. “There’s just so little eat around here.”

“You have giant rats,” Discord growled and his grip tightened around us. “I find it hard to believe you need a pony to survive.”

“Please,” we cried. “We won’t do it again. We’ll never hurt another pony again. We promise.” After what happened, I don’t think any of us could even look at a pony without having a heart-attack. Do we have just one heart, or three? I couldn’t think about that right now, because of my fear.

Then we were full sized and WE HAD FUR! Yes! No snowy cloud. We were warm and cozy and YEOWTCH! Fire! Fire! Why did we have to sit on the fire springs? Why did it have to shoot us up into the air?

Oof.

...Why is the ground so hard?

“I’m glad we came to an understanding,” Discord chuckled and was dressed like that witch trick or treater foal we tried to eat once. Again, she escaped. We have terrible luck with ponies. “I honestly would have preferred to let you freeze to death in a fire swamp, but eh, ponies have morals to live by.” He cringed on the word ‘morals’. He jumped on some broom and waved. “Arrivederci!”

________________________________________________________________

We were still hungry. That beast ‘Discord’ scared away all the creatures when he came by. Just like he did last time. It’s like he gives off this aura that drives him away. We can wait for them to come back. That’s probably the best option. We’re still weak from all that cold and no food for days. We’re strong enough to break a rat’s back though, so we shouldn’t worry about the killing part.

Then we heard the familiar sounds of somepony coming. They were even trailing a cart behind them. Usually, we’d have set up an ambush for the stupid pony. Now, we just screamed and dived into a bush. We didn’t want ‘her’ to see us. No, not ever again. She could do what she wanted, but she had to leave us alone. The sound were getting closer and we started to shake. She was going to hate us and hurt us. She was going to get that beast to curse us once more. Why wouldn’t she go away.

The cart stopped before us. This was it. We were going to die. We were too young to die. We haven’t even mated yet. Actually, that’s a lie, but no cubs came of it. We waited for her to find us. We weren’t that hard to find. How could you not? The bush was shaking with us.

She didn’t find us. The cart just started off. Why didn’t she attack us?

“Hey Sweetkill,” the mare called Applejack yelled.

We growled. She knew we were here and she was going to mock us. We might as well answer. So we stuck out our head and said, “What?” Then we smelt something oh so good~ Looking down, we saw an apple pie. Why was there an apple pie in front of the bush? Did she drop it and want us to give it back?

“It’s on the house,” she said and we just stared at her in shock. She was giving us free food? After what we had done? Was this pony mad? “Consider it an apology and maybe a truce between us. What’ya say?”

We just stared at the pony. She wanted a truce? No more fighting? We shouldn’t believe her. She was with the beast. We should kill her for that. We should kill her for the stupidity.

“I’m hungry,” I hissed.

“Quiet,” my tiger sister spoke. She didn’t move us to kill the stupid pony. Maybe we should believe her. It wouldn’t hurt. So we took the pie. Better it than nothing.

“See ya next time, Sweetkill.” She waved us off with her hat before going on.

We wouldn’t kill the stupid pony. Another predator would get her for being so nice. We wouldn’t. Biting into the pie, we knew we would never. This pie was just so… so much that we couldn’t help ourselves. We scarfed it down. If Applejack gave us more pies, we might help her against other predators.

We are really clever when we want to be.

Author's Note

Sorry for not posting in a while. A lot of things came up.

I had to make this chapter. Felt that Sweetkill at least deserved a chance. {Yeah, I'm the kind of guy who thinks everyone deserves that.} So I hope you all enjoyed this and please leave a comment.