Love Falls by the River Twice

by AwesomeKurt

Rating: mature
Tags: Random, Alternate Universe, Gore, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Other, Romance, Adventure, Sex
Length: 4349

This was the product of a thread on /mlp/ where they were asked to all help write a fanfiction.

A few days ago in the wastelands of /mlp/ on 4chan, someone asked everyone to band together and write a fanfiction. This clusterfuck was born. It makes absolutely no sense and barely qualifies as literature. That, however, is what makes it great. Please note that this is not at all meant to be taken seriously.

Published 2012-05-21 19:24:02 UTC
Last updated 2012-06-18 17:14:36 UTC

Chapter 1

Love Falls by the River Twice Chapter 1
by /mlp/

one morning in ponyville Rarity woke up to find Spike's penis in her twat AND THEN NIGGERS CAME IN Then Pony Jesus came while Celestia transformed into a stapler. on fire Spike rammed the stapler through the tight anus of Rarity. Unfortunately, Fluttershy's dildo was in the middle of Sweetie Belle's marshmallow butthole But was it worth all the blood? a nigger came along which rainbow dash stuffed into her cooter A crate of dildos all of which were dipped in cat's while questioning the value of life before ripping it apart with the snake BIG HORSE COCKS Nigger licked my anus and then they all tasted like chicken Niggers tounge my anus BEFORE THE FASCIST INVADER except scootaloo, she tasted like Fluttershy the slut got had a cup of semen tea and decided to go rape a dragon and then, they ran, they ran so far awaaay, that Futashy licked a niggers anus And then the spaghetti exploded in such a massive explosion that an spaghetti galaxy came into being with cute little spahgetti humans living on spahgetti planets somewhere in the big nowhere that we call home. BUT THE SPAGHETTI WAS A LIE AND A JOKE

One day, Nathan was busy furiously and then princess celestia closed the book and began to sexually pleasure both twilight sparkle and princess luna at the same time with her hooves. "Mommy, what does god think?" asked Billy, the poor spahgetti boy, with his last breath, suffweing from cancer. 3 hours of pure pony pleasure "God stopped thinking." answered Billy's mother. In awe, she stared into the abyss of the world that shall be her grave from now until the end of spahgetti. While nathan finished all over Billy's face Meanwhile, Sethisto tried to squeeze the spahgetti back into his pocket, but it was just too much. And death shall be where death is supposed to be. Billy fainted It was over. De Lancie won. Raritys vagina leaked and her vagina muscles twitched for a cock The fandom is destroyed. Then Nathan sat down. Making a point to stare at the mare vagina Sethisto was later found dead in a horse stomach. then they made a quest to find the dragonballs So that they could revive the fandom But Spike didn't hit puberty yet. But where soon confronted by Vegeta who revealed his true power level: He was a massive pony faggot, clopping to gore and stuff like that. Vegeta was later found dead in Sethistos stomach. Then Trunks walked in on Vegeta who was dead btw Equestria was invaded by Nazis The End who then raped spitfire with Chrysalis but derpy eated it eated it all Then Jesus revived everyone, and took a shit on Hitler. Trunks could no longer bear the pain and Even though Hitler made trunks a favour And thats when you woke up on a beach, and realized it was Inception Jews. Until Hitler, in a very tight and revealing bathing suit, sat in your lap and started making out with you. Suddenly Trunks is a brony. He's wearing a fedora and his hair is all long and shit. His favorite pony is Rainbow Dash twelve mangos Trunk's Rainbow Dash tulpa became real! Meanwhile in Staliongrad... PONY ORGY! Said Professor Horsefuck while licking Sweetie Belle's marshmallow butthole while fucking his stapler that turned out to be Celestia A tight vagina appeared oozing wetness and natural virgin pheromones Trunks started throwing Spaghetti balls at the sun. and lucas pulled the last needled But it was too late! Rita Repulsa was back and ready to fuck Trunks and Lucas. big mac's giant cock pounded into his hot warm plot Meanwhile at sugarcube corner Then Trunks ran out of spaghetti. Suddenly Nazis, thousands of them. I had a wonderful dream while lying in the bathtub yesterday, I dove into the sea and it turned into shit, fish, seaweed, jellyfish, everything turned into poo, even the sky, Allah himself. TAKE ME TO YOUR LEADER Moot rose from the sea to but Gaben knew that episode 3 must have ponies sage eat bananas eat shit. Fuck pinkie pie in the butthole said the Nazi hordes, sweeping through Ponyville. The Mayor then led them onto the train Twilight Sparkle gasped in pleasure as Trunks' Rainbow Dash Tulpa began to lick her vajayjay. She groaned in delight, not having experienced such pleasure from another pony, nevermind a female. The Tulpa smirked as she pulled her head from Twilight Sparkle's vagoo, and spread her legs, her happy button growing into a full-sized lollypop. Twilight gasped in delight, looking down to the Tulpa's 15-foot long salt rod, pressing her pony toochie against the Tulpa's throbbing golf club.
"TAKE MEEEEEE~" Twilight cried, as she threw her hips back, impaling herself on the tulpa's sword, crying in pleasure as she went down on the 15-foot monster.

Then the tulpa fucked Twilight in the vagina. With her penis.
Her 15-foot long penis.

Rainbow Dash has a 15-foot long penis, according to Trunks.
Don't worry Luna. They needed something to........... The bronies then decided to rape the inhabitants of /v/ just to see how much they'd scream and beg for more as the giant horse cock penetrated their assholes pinki pie puts on a strap on and mounts twilight sparkle Suddenly, the warning siren went off. The Deathstar was approaching Equestria i demand fanart of this fic and that's how Captain America destroyed HYDRA single handedly and got some of the best plot in Ponyville THE END fan art? I demand a freaking music video! "But how did Captain America kill the Nazis with the Death Star?" Tommy asked, With a squishy eleven inch... of the chapter one "Well, that's a story for another night, Tommy." Tommy's dad kissed him on the cheek, and promptly retired downstairs to fap to preggo kangaroo furries.
The End. Well, Tommy my boy, back in the 40's, Captain America had the ability to travel through space, time, and movies. And then Arthur Fonzarelli jumped over the shark tank on his motorcycle But it was not the end, as Megatron still had Iron Man hostage!!!
!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Then Michael Bay came with his explosion machine and exploded everyone, replacing them with big breasted women leaning over cars. then reddit and 4chan got married suddenly celestia came out of the trees and thrust her big... hooves into the young mares beef sandwich THEN THEY ALL FUCKED!
THE END!!!

Chapter 2

Chapter 2
One beautiful morning in Ponyville... OP died and /mlp/ was forever saved >rape shining armor got hit in the face with … a pony named Cracs was getting high off his ass... >rape Plowed deep enough to prolapse sweetie belles uterus And clopping to pics he had taken of Rainbow Dash When Arthur Fonzarelli jumped over the shark tank on his motorcycle And they all caught cancerAids from Op’s post Twilight Sparkle masturbated with a cactus That’s a thing btw, people have actually drawn that. This is an imageboard. You’re talking about an image. I strongly suggest you find and post it. Pretty please. The Americans invaded Equestria for Unobtanium, (Marine Sgt) “Were not in Kansas anymore” The ponies fought back valiantly, but were all destroyed, and Equestria strip mined. Anon delivers: http://asktwilightspankle.tumblr.com/
…
Sort of... Then they all fucked. The end … or is it? Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like? what Big Mac’s giant cock slammed into his tight plot, braeburn begged for mercy but big mac kept going until candy pony semen was in his every orifice. PICS And then he took out his horn and shot off both their horns off. AJ grabed the Mac’s dick while she watched the new Pepsi commercial. Tyler The Creator suddenly appeared in pony form and started rapping “Radicals” Then Luna and Celestia joined the party and was all like “ohai guise” But all of a sudden Discord showed up and fucked shit up. big mac and braeburn’s dicks fused together to form a mega dick, which made all the girls cum in 30 seconds Then spike goes for a walk whilst day dreaming about rarity when he trips onto rarity’s hoofs and blushes so hard. Dan Backslide then inserted a penny loafer into Celestia’s anal cavity, and screamed, “I Love DICK!!” i fucked a dog up the ass last week black nigger on the ass horse “I wanna fuck a dead dog with my lower horn!”, announced Luna. As she began to shit on the floor. ...and there was a gay orgy... Then the giant octopus swallowed the tug boat with it’s vagina, rarity came. but none of them could beat the Undertaker’s streak! And moot fapped for 3 months straight, then his chode exploded. Then, tit butter was had “what if the niggas are ponies?” Billy asked the master zen in chinatown Who then revealed his trap card it was too late! Godzilla fired his mighty atomic fire at Moots chode erupted from the heavens and killed all the shmooves, all but one weeb. Captcha: delivar. “Celestia!” Goku yelled out. “this my normal form and this! is super sayjin!” And all of the black prople in Harlem started eatong potatoes in unison then all the fluffy ponies died Auuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuunnnnnnnggggggggg Azekahh read it Then Eric Idle proceeded to rape and murder each of the Mane 6, along with his friend, John Cleese And then shipping happened, so everyone went home. ...Just then Ronald Reagan descended from Heaven and taught the ponies about the perilous evils of Communism. Then Alex Mercer went on a rampage but Dolph Ziggler stopped him and then a nigger came and stabbed Dolph Ziggler. Nick Cage showed up and exploded while bees were in his ass Rarity, Fluttershy and Pinkie Pie became worst ponies. Tracy showed up too because Nicholas Cage, who was mentioned in this thread, is her favorite actor and because there hasn't been a Tracy thread in a long long time. Tracy ate out Rainbow Dash and gained her powers Damn niggers. One beautiful morning in Ponyville OP died and /mlp/ was forever saved. shining armor got hit in the face with a pony named Cracks was getting high off of his ass Plowed deep enough to prolapse sweetie belles uterus And clopping to pics he had taken of Rainbow Dash When Arthur Fonzarelli jumped over the shark tank on his motorcycle And they all caught cancerAids from Op's post Twilight Sparkle masturbated with a cactus (That's a thing btw, people have actually drawn that). The Americans invaded Equestria for Unobtanium, (Marine Sgt) "Were not in Kansas anymore." The ponies fought back valiantly, but were all destroyed, and Equestria strip mined.
Then they all fucked. The end ...or is it?
Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?
Big Mac's giant cock slammed into his tight plot, braeburn begged for mercy but big mac kept going until candy pony semen was in his every orifice.
And then he took out his horn and shot off both their horns off. And then they sex ... But suddenly the Earth began to tremble as Joseph Stalin rose from the fiery depths of Hell and challenged Ronald Reagan to a fight for the future of Equestria. Of course Ronald Reagan, infused with the power of pony friendship and the principles of trickle-down economics, easily defeated the evil harbinger of Communism. Forever freeing the ponies to live in a world of free market capitalism, love, and friendship. And then they have sex. Then RapeTrain came to visit. But everyone's fun soon came to an abrupt end as Hulk Hogan showed up and started complaining to his good friend Eric Bischoff about how celestia and luna were undeserving of their titles and how they were never ready for the main event because they'd never bodyslammed the 8 billion ton andre the giant in front of 20 trillion hulkamaniacs at the canterlot silverdome, brotherdudejack.

Naturally it wasn't long before the hulkster's backstage politicking meant that both royal sisters were completely buried, allowing hogan to take the title as equestria's new king, with all the candy-flavoured filly semen he could ever ask for. As they all ran into Twilight's basement, Celestia announced that Manehattan was destroyed by a nuclear blast. Suddenly Adolf Hitler arrived on a golden chariot and convinced the Unicorn and Pegasus ponies to rid themselves of the Earth Pony filth that was assuredly holding them back from their true potential. The Earth ponies were put into camps where they just grew food all day and died because that's all they're good for. ...Also, Dale Gribble was there, he informed the ponies Celestia was really part of a United Nations conspiracy to indoctrinate them into believing friendship and togetherness was the solution to all life's problems. Forcing them to ignore the fact society had made no great strides in thousands of years of her rule. And then all the Korrafags were burned alive at the stake while being raped by hundreds of niggers with Siamese dicks. Unfortunately Dale had contracted rabies and was running around on all fours biting every pone he saw. It was the biggest explosion ever.
That day the ponies learned there are more powerful things than friendship in this world. George Zimmerman appeared in Ponyville. He asked the residents if they'd seen any zebra scum skulking about. ...suddenly RAWK HAWK dropped from the sky and laid the smack down on Zimmerman, telling him he "should stick to killin' niggers." Hank was forced to walk the breadth of Equestria, to find and kill his best friend, thus preventing Dale from infecting the ponies with rabies. "You can eat your shoe, y'know." Said Applejack "You can eat your shoe, y'know." Said Applejack

Chapter 3

Chapter 3
'It was a dark and stormy night as Twilight Sparkle '... masturbated furiously with a cactus whilst saging a terrible thread on /mlp/. while spike fucked her ass. She found her keys Than big mac broke down the door with his huge horse dick NOTHING HAPPENED! Something did happen I walked right into the middle of the room Just in time to get rapped hard by niggers up the way up my ass, I felt them I'm not feelin it man, not tonight. and promptly went to canterlot. Just then Fluttershy bursts in screaming I twisted the brick open and drank the brick-milk inside. we galloped into Diagon Alley Luna munched furiously on some goldfish The cheerios were getting cold. "But brick milk is poisonous Fluttershy!" Exclaimed Twilight still using the cactus to masturbate in canterlot. I promptly slapped her ass sexily. 'AHM A HORSE, I AHM HORSE, I HORSE, KAPEECH?' Suddenly, NIGGERS broke into the castle and stole Lunas breakfast! Enraged at the niggers, Luna... Made it illegal for them to vote Then the Jews came and stole all the ponies bits. But then they seduced them into a gas chamber Nigger tongued my anus The Equestrian empire was plunged into enormous debt, with no way to recover' it... Grabs her Lynching clothes..... And hands them to the protagonist, who happens to be a faggot But then CropTool showed up with a fresh bucket of marshmallow pony semen! Tracy fapped HARD and then dove into the bucket suddenly celestia had them open fire upon It occurred to me, if all we post is ass, nigger, and rape, it's going to be the opposite of funny.

We need a few brave people to try and convey a scrap of a story, before everyone else shit's all over it. Or else it's just going to be shit. Fluttershy said, "I sure had fun at that Nickelback concert!" and then there was shit all over the shit so I shit my shit shit shit pony There were no survivors. then pinkie pie walked in and she was all like "sup" What the fuck is this shit... and I was all like "s'cool, s'coool" But Luna had other plans.... she stopped gravity! Back at Ponyville, Rarity was designing dresses for some new clients. So far they looked pretty good, so she started to sew them, but while sewing she... To conquer 4chan. with ableist ponies nibbled her hoof, just a little bit then devoured her entire leg and then sweetie belle was all like "WATS GUD NIGGUH?" then the niggers came and fucked a bucket of chicken but the bucket of chicken was actually scootaloo the niggers took scootaloo and all had a huge bukkake tsunami I was surfing that wave, when Applebloom saw what was happening and took out the knife she hides in her mane. She leapt up onto the back of the nigger and stabbed him in the neck. she then got off the body and... but that was just a distraction for proceeded to take the knife and stick it in the niggers pocket, spilling all the spaghetti from ponychans bulging belly did I mention my glue fetish? Mmmmmmm i took my glue and I started gluing my anus shut But something was trying to get out. Just then, Pinkie Pie busted from my anus, splattering shit and confetti everywhere then i was all like "ok" and proceeded to rape rarity who was licking the confetti off the floor. Just then, Daniel Tosh started to floss his shit hole with his shirt Rarity whimpered "nu..nyu..NOOO!" as rainbow dash slowly fingered her wet vagina with a grin in her face. and then pinkie shot tosh in the face because she felt like it. Rainbow Dash pulled her fingers out of raritys wet vagina, Rarity in heat and lust whimpered take all of me, Rainbow Dash with a big grin in her face fisted rarity with all her might. except she's a horse and she has no fingers or fists, so she spawned 20 arms out of her abdomen... but then suddenly rarity exploded into a bunch sweetie belles. the arms squirmed and shot hot sperm out of them, it tasted like skittles fermented in shit out of nowhere, ice tea and hoodies appeared from thin air as George Zimmerman burst in... everyone then had an epic orgy, which the got on the floor and presumed to walk the dinosaur "This thread made my fucking day, because fuck the fourth wall!" exclaimed un-important random pony. and then celestia raped a fluffy pony but then the moon was like "Skull Kid be ridin my ass like a horny cowboy" and crashed into Zecora's nigger hut Zecora was being a nigger like usually, eating watermelon and dating fat white bitches when she exclaimed "hey hey hey, it's time to get the fuck up outta here" Link Lyra then came to the rescue with her lyr--ocarina, played the song of time, and reset everything back to normal and don't fuck up the story this time Lyra was a lying asleep in the middle of a grove, when out of the darkness came An Ursa Major. but i have no idea who the fuck tracy is so haggrid burst in and told twilight "you're a wizard Luke" But all of a sudden Bon-Bon burst in and said... "You're movin' with your auntie and uncle in Bel-Air!" I begged and pleaded with her day after day, but she packed my suite case and sent me on my way ...Oh it's my turn? Then that guy from Altered Beast said RISE FROM YOUR GRAVE!!! and fuck all happened and OP remembered he was a faggot and he fucked his cousin for good measure

Chapter 4

Chapter 4
One day, a huge idiot posted a thread on /mlp/. And then there was >rape. And then everyone was gay and died of AIDS. Twilight Sparkle then Chipped in a massive slice of dick. "This is it girls, the jackpot," said Fluttershy, who had reclaimed the massive wong from a well-endowed parrot. Each one cut off a delicate slice of the somehow throbbing member, then placed it in their mouths. fucked a nigger While being pissed on by Rarity. Then Sethisto and Nathan licked each other's assholes and "Don't tell any one I'm a piss slut," Rarity Said. then Golden Showers pissed all over Raritys vagoojayjay "IT'S THE NIGHT OF PISS," /mlp/ said. Nathan was outraged. Yamino and Purple Tinker then pissed on /mlp/ with their 20 inch dicks. Then Spinach rated everyone's OCs terribly, but suddenly stopped because he was a nigger and forgot how to read. "Egad!" Blublood cried, "For I am a nigger and the art of literature is lost to me!" Then Derpy Hooves came in and said: "D-don't forget about me guises, lick my pussy~!" Oh shit, said Rainboom Dash as she proceeded to remove her blouse. Than Outta nowhere futashy appeared and stroked her cock furiously Rarity, still pissing, proceeded to suck said cock, suddenly Naruto appeared. Derpy hooves put her mouth on Futashy's penis and mumbles out "I want der cum!" "What the fuck is wrong with her eyes," said Naruto. then the dovahkiin walked in with his bitches and money. >suddenly Naruto appeared.

FUCK NO! Get outta here FAGGOT! futashy then proceeded to ejaculate strands of tangy candy flavoured rainbow pony semen then they cheered as they realized that the plane had seen them and they were getting off the island. Then a bunch of shitty OCs appeared amd proceeded to shit on everything. but then they realized that the island was actually a pennensula THEN SHEPARD BEAT THE ROOPERS Suddenly, Naruto cast a shadow jutsu and was revealed to be not Naruto, but his own original character Yamino Sparkle. Yamino Sparkle dawned her Leather Fetish Fedora of Felonious Faggotree (lol bloomberg) and shouted, As the Nazi hordes swept over Equestria, Twilight Sparkle realized one thing: She really, really needed to get off. Yamino really wondered why she shouted this, but it was too late, there was a purple cock to be sucked! than big mac used his erect horse penis as a bridge so the cmc could get across the river safely And thus, love fell by the river for the last time.

The End. Suddenly, out of the sky, Gene Wilder appeared, his brown hat perched atop his head and his purple jacked billowing in the wind. Rainbow Dash said, "He's even WILDER than me." Gene exclaimed, "You all must be new here!" and proceeded to insert lollipops into Sweetie Belle's marshmallow butthole. Then Sweetie Belle took the biggest shit in all of equestria. Is Trunks still a brony? If not, is his fedora for sale? Then Gene Wilder who was also known as Willy Wonka turned to see Trunks, who miraculously healed after being annihilated by Nazis. Trunks called upon Rainbow Dash once more, and Dashie raped all of them with his 15-foot long niggercock. Suddenly, Pinkie Pie got ahold of Willy Wonka's Fizzy Lifting Drinks, and gulped them down. But it turns out that they were actually Wonka's Fizzy Willy-Lifting Drinks, and Pinkie became incredibly horny. Professor Farnsworth's dimension-traveling machine appeared on the scene, and he said, "Good news everyone! I niggers tongued my anus And then Professor Farnsworth's anus was brutally tongued by niggers. Horse semen rained from the sky for no apparent reason. Then everyone looked up and it was Jesus, jizzing over all of Equestria with over nine thousand cocks. "LOL, HI GUISE" he said. And they all drowned in horse semen except for Trunks who will be instrumental in the story at some point in the future that I don't really care to expound upon at the current moment.

THE END. Mama Luigi closed the book, seeing that Yoshi was finally asleep. As he got up to leave, Yoshi opened his eyes and said, op is a faggot THen, Mario came in through the curtain and said I HOPE THEY MADE LOTSA SPAGHETTI Suddenly, Mario realized that wasn't his line, and actual spaghetti erupted out of his overalls, and the whole world was reborn in spaghetti.

THE ACTUAL END LOL BUT THEN OLD SPICE GUY BROKE THROUGH THE FOURTH WALL AND SAID, "OLD SPICE ODORBLOCKER BODYWASH IS TOO POWERFUL TO LET THIS STORY REALLY END!" AND HE KICKED /mlp/ UNTIL IT ADDED MORE WORDS TO THE STORY But /mlp/ was to busy watching Queen Chrysalis stroke herself tenderly while /mlp/ watched her stroke herself tenderly. SUCK MAH DICk inb4 this is why we can't have nice things. this is why we can't have nice things The End. BUT SURPRISE IT WASN'T THE END BECAUSE FLUTTERSHY SAW THE PONY ORGY AND WAS HORNY. bump SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG but then pinkie pie hopped on her laser-firing hover giraffe The end. Now hurry the fuck up and write this down. The giraffe stood up, but hit its head on Dash's throbbing mare dick Dash finally cut her dick off and became a lesbian. But was assaulted by Bananarama, who had been posessed by the demon lord Pazuzu. And then Pinkie shoved a cactus in her ass.
Hi kids! Do you like violence?
Wanna see me stick Nine Inch Nails through each one of my eyelids?
Wanna copy me and do exactly like I did?
Try 'cid and get fucked up worse that my life is? Pinkie then felt a lump in her throat as she began to gag on her tea The real Slim Shady choked on Rainbow Dash's severed dick. And then they found out that god, and reality, the matrix, infinity, the muliverse, time, space, and all logic was horse's dick