Spike Does Not Approve

by TerrestrialDrake

Rating: everyone
Tags: Slice of Life, Main 6, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Spike, Comedy, Rarity, Other, Romance, Twilight Sparkle
Length: 4918

Spike does not take kindly to rude guests.

When the Yakyakistan's start wrecking stuff after finding out that the food isn't perfect, Spike has more than a few choice words for them.

Published 2015-06-29 05:40:02 UTC
Last updated 2015-07-27 06:50:31 UTC

No! None of that!

Spike was going about putting the final touches on his preparations for the Yak's visit, just as Twilight had instructed him to. Checking to see if all the food he had prepared was in place, his announcing trumpet was working at maximum efficiency, and making sure that all of the entrance hall and halls leading to it were extra clean.

'Not to shabby, if I do say so myself.', Spike thought to himself as he finished putting everything in place and grabbing his long horn trumpet. He took one more peak into the entrance hall to see how the others were doing, wincing a little when he saw that Twilight was kinda losing her cool, but otherwise impressed that all the others had properly done their part of the preparations.

He retreated back into the halls, after silently thanking the rest of the main six for calming Twi down, and quietly waited on the Yak's arrival. Then the entrance to the castle doors suddenly burst open revealing their guests, big burly creatures with massive horns, lots of fur, and wearing various forms of ornate gold jewelry and some light body amour.

'Wow, those guys look pretty tough... well except that their makes'em look kinda hippie-ish.', Spike thought upon seeing them. They were quick to make it down the halls to where the welcoming party was being held, so Spike quickly stepped through the doorway to the entrance hall and used his trumpet to announce the Yak's arrival.

Not even a second after blowing the horn the doors slam open and flatten Spike against the wall, consequently breaking his trumpet in the process.

'I wonder if I should be worried that I'm getting used to this?, Spike thought as he de-sandwiched himself from in between the door and the wall just in time to hear Twilight say, "You must be hungry after your long journey.", and quite hurriedly signal for him to bring in the food. I quickly push the table full of food in front of the trio of Yaks as Twilight says. "We've prepared a banquet of traditional Yak foods!"

The Prince gives the food a quick once over before abruptly stating, "If things not perfect Yaks get mad. Yaks always get mad when things not perfect.", making Twilight gulp nervously just before the Yak prince takes a bite. The Prince immediately spits it out, splattering some food on the princess's cheek, and shouts. "This no taste like Yak food!" His nostrils begin to flair making Spike and the others nervous. "Fake pony food make Yaks mad!" he declares before using his large horns to flip the table, giving a war cry, and then him and his friends start trampling it's underside.

Everypony was stunned into silence, including Spike, until they started trashing the castle. When the Yaks went after the interior of the castle, when that happened it looked like something had snapped in Spike, his eye's widened and he clenched his fists. Spike almost immediately sprints toward one of the yaks shouting. "Hey! HEY! Get your hooves off the castle!" before breathing a jet of green flame.

The Yak reared back, letting out a sort of deep-throated squeal when the fire shot in front of him, singeing his fur and making him retreat back little. But the young drake wasn't done yet, he quickly set out to herding together the Yaks with his dragon fire, and some fierce roars and growls, until all three were huddled into a corner of the castle.

The crystals of the castle were visibly heated up, almost to their melting point, wherever Spike's happened to hit them when he herded the foreigners, but he was careful not to actually set anything on fire during his little rage. The Yaks tried to put up a tough front, fixing the dragon with a smoldering glare, but it was obvious from their tentative movements that they weren't about to make any sudden movements, for fear of getting a face full of dragon fire.

"Listen!" Spike shouted. "I don't care how things work in your country but in Equestria you don't go around smashing people's property just because you decided you wanted to have a hissy fit!" he said, stepping closer to the foreigners. "You got that you bunch of overgrown gerbils!?" Smoke was streaming out the corners of his mouth at this point and his pupils had become even thinner, giving him a more predatory look.

The drake's ranting might have gone on for longer had he not been encased in an all to familiar lavender aura of magic and dragged behind Twilight and her friends. Where he was then promptly restrained by Applejack and Rainbow Dash, though he was to stunned from the jarring movement to put up any sort of resistance.

"I am so so sooo sorry for my assistance's outburst, he's usually so well behaved!" The Princess says teleporting in front of the trio, but before they can say anything in response, she quickly starts pushing them towards the exit with a wall of magic as she nervously says. "But let's not dwell on the past, how about my best friends Applejack and Pinkie Pie show you to where you'll be sleeping!?"

At that, AJ takes the hint and rushes over as Rainbow Dash quickly wraps Spike in bear hug from behind as soon as the orange pony leaves to follow the Yaks out the door.

"I unfortunately will not be able to accompany you on your walk!" Twilight shouts after the Yaks, "I have some... things I need to discuss with my assistant.", she says as she telekinetically shuts the door with her magic before turning to give Spike a pointed glare.

"Oh boy..", Spike warily thinks as the angry alicorn stomps toward him while he is trapped in Rainbow Dash's hold.

Author's Note

Yeah, as you can tell, this my first story.

So criticism of any kind is welcome.

We can talk about this...

When the lavender alicorn stomped forward, her hooves banging loudly against the crystal floor, until she was right in front of her scaly assistant. When she was only a few inches away from Spike, Rainbow Dash finally let go of him, he stumbled a little from the sudden drop, but quickly recovered and meekly looked up to the glowering alicorn.

"Well Spike?" Twilight began. "Do you have anything to say for yourself?" She finished with an irritated huff. "I- uh- um, well you see...", Spike was a blubbering mess, not only could he not really place why he had reacted so violently, but Twilight's judgmental stare was also making him second guess his actions.

The young drake was seconds away from just giving up and opting for the classic, "I'm so sorry, I just don't know what came over me.", and accept the inevitable grounding. That is until a certain purple maned unicorn with a white coat and dazzling blue eyes decided to speak up.

"Well, if Spike doesn't have anything to say, I'd like to speak on his behalf.", Rarity said as she stepped over to the dragon's right side, with only the slightest hint of animosity in her voice. "I think that Spike did an excellent job at teaching those ruffians some manners.", the unicorn proclaimed whilst putting a fore leg around the little guy, "And I'm honestly a little disappointed in all us for not reacting as fast as he did.", she finished while raising her nose up a bit.

Twilight just stood there for a few seconds stunned by Rarity's outburst, but quickly found her composure, "O-oh come on, they're just, uhh... different.", she responded uncertainly.

Rarity simply shook her head in response, "Be that as it may that is no excuse for the way they acted.", she responds quickly, "And if they sought to live peacefully with us then they would have had to have eventually learned that this type of behavior is not acceptable.

The lavender equine opened mouth her to respond but was interrupted by a certain shy and yellow speaking up, "I, um, gotta go with Spike and Rarity on this.", Fluttershy says as she took to the drake's left. Twilight sputtered a little, at a loss for words, until just saying "Y-you too?"

"Umm, don't get me wrong, I not much for violence", Fluttershy says, letting some of her hair cover her right eye, "And I do think that Spike's hurtful words were a bit uncalled for."

Twilight's ears perk up a little at what Fluttershy was saying. "So your on my si-". But she was quickly cut off, "Ah ah ah, let me finish.", the yellow one said as she raised her foreleg and put it on Spike's shoulder.

"I do however think that the Yaks were being very mean, bully-ish, unappreciative and needed to be taught a lesson.", Fluttershy finished with a decisive "Humph!" Then another pony decided to speak up before Twilight could even think of a response, "Yeah, Twi, what those Yaks were doing was pretty un-cool.", Rainbow commented as she hovered behind Spike.

Twilight sputtered for a few seconds until just incredulously saying. "But, you and Applejack helped me stop him!" Rainbow simply rolled her eyes in response. "The only reason I held him back was because I thought he was going to flame broil those guys; not because I didn't like what he was doing.", at that Rainbow landed on her rump and folded her forelegs in front of her chest, "Sorry egghead, not budging on this one.".

Spike had remained un-characteristically quite during this whole exchange but decided that now would probably be the best time to try and reason with his sister/mother/best friend. "Come on Twilight, are you really that angry at me for what I did?" Spike said as he stepped forward and put a hand on her shoulder.

There were a few seconds of silence as the alicorn turned her head away and refused to look her assistant in the eye, but eventually, with an exasperate sigh, she wrapped a wing around him in a hug.

"Okay... maybe I should've been a little bit more understanding.", she sheepishly said as she brought Spike in for a hug. "A little?" Rarity commented. "Maybe?" Fluttershy questioned but the drake simply turned his head and shushed them both. "I guess I just got too carried away trying to make this event perfect.", Twilight guiltily admitted, "It's okay Twi, I know.", Spike says as he returned the hug wholeheartedly.

"Uh, not breakup this extremely heart-wrenching moment, but shouldn't we be checking up on AppleJack and Pinkie?" Rainbow suddenly pointed out while hovering over the duo.

"Oh sweet Celestia no.", Twilight muttered as she, Spike, Fluttershy, Rarity, and Rainbow Dash looked at what was happening. Applebloom and the rest of the Cutie Mark Crusaders telling off the Yak prince himself, in front of Applejack's barn.

We be proud and strong warriors!, the Prince Yak bellowed, flaring his nostrils, whilst baring down on the three fillies. "I don't know, AppleJack said you weren't looking so proud and strong when Spike was about to break his foot in your-" Scootaloo was about to finish her sentence until a blue blur swept her up into the air.

"Hey girls how about we go up to the club house?!" Rainbow Dash hurriedly says before zooming off. "What a pleasant idea darling! HaHaHa!" Rarity says awkwardly as she trotted off after Rainbow, carrying the two other fillies with her magic.

The Yak trio then turned towards the yellow pegasus, alicorn, and teenage drake with a dissatisfied grunt and marched towards them, Spike then proceed to put a hand on the top of his head and say, "-sigh- This won't end well.", as he walked forward.

Author's Note

Sorry if you don't like that this chapter isn't as action packed as the first.

You can tell me anything.

After a few pointed glare towards Spike, courtesy of the Yaks, and some hurried talking and quick thinking on Twilight's and Fluttershy's part, the Yaks were on their way to Fluttershy's mini-animal parade.(With Pinkie watching from the side-lines.)

"Alright Spike.", Twilight said as she turned toward her number one assistant, "I think those two should be able to handle our guests and the rest off the girls should be back soon as well.", she says as she places Spike on her back.

"Let me guess, you want to talk about my little burst this morning?" Spike says as he secured his stubby legs along Twilight's sides. With that said, Twilight teleported them both into Spike's new bedroom, bouncing slightly as they landed on his bed. The room it's self was mostly clean, aside from a few gem shards on the floor and a... Rarity-Plushy on his pillow?

"Spike..", Twilight says as she levitates the doll up to eye level with her, to get a closer look. "What is this thing and why do you have it?" She says, more than a little weirded out that he has this thing in his room and on his bed.

The young drake looked up to his care taker with genuine confusion in eyes before saying, "Wait- Weren't you the one who gave it to me?", he finishes with an incredulously tone in his voice. "W-what?", Twilight states flabbergasted, "Why would I give it to yo-You know what? Forget it.", the lavender says definitively, obviously not wanting to explore the past of the honestly creepy object. "That isn't why I brought us here anyway.", the alicorn says as she flings the plushy to the opposite side of the room with her magic.

With that said she wrapped Spike in a hug, his back pressing into her chest, and rolled on to her back so that they were both looking up at the ceiling. Her fore legs were wrapped around his belly and his hands rested on her hooves, effectively snuggling Spike against her, making Twilight giggle from his spines digging in into her chest and tickling her.

This was an old little coping method the duo used when either one of them was feeling stressed, or when they needed to some peace and quite to talk things over, such as right now.

"So, why did you get so angry at them for trying to wreck the castle?" Twilight started off, "Because I'm gonna be honest; the way you snapped at them was very unlike you.", she finished while looking down at her adoptive drake brother.

"I- I'm not sure Twi...", Spike said, turning his head to the side, trying to avoid his sister's gaze. In truth, even after being given time to think it over, Spike still didn't know why he reacted so quickly and with such rage, even though he did hold himself back a bit.

The alicorn hummed in thought for a moment before saying, "I think I might know way to figure out why; I'm gonna need you to close your eyes and recall what you did", she said, turning Spikes head so that he was looking straight a head again.

Spike hesitated a few seconds but eventually started recalling the memory, "Good, now focus on what you were feeling during the whole experience, primarily during, just before, and after you were attacking them.", she explains.

It wasn't long before Spike could roughly remember how he was feeling during the whole incident, "Good, now tell me exactly what you were feeling.", Twilight finished.

"Well, I felt angry, felt kinda primal, like when I felt during my birthday incident", he said frowning. "But also... kinda sad.", Twilight tilted her head in thought at this. "Sad? Why would you b-, Wait second! Primal!?" The purple alicorn suddenly shouts.

Spike looks up to Twilight with a questioning hum. "Of course, the reason you got so heated was because you're still, uh,... sore about Tirek destroying the Library", Twilight concluded. "Yeah, maybe, but that doesn't explain why it felt primal or similar to when I feel greed.", Spike says, questioning Twi's logic. "Oh, that's easy, dragons are notorious for being very territorial; they don't sleep on their treasure just because it's comfy.", Twilight quickly explains.

"Wow, Twilight.", Spike says with genuine suprise in his tone. "Since when did you suddenly become a philospher?" The older sibiling chuckles in response to her brother's teasing, "Very funny Spike.", she says, "But ohnestly, I've been getting some lessons about how to read people from Cadnce."

Spike was about to inquire more, but was quickly cut off by Twilight saying, "But more importantly, what we just found out could help with appeasing our Yak friends, the alicorn excitedly says as she turns Spike around to face her.

The young assistant new the look on his caretaker's face all to well and his expression showed his apprehension perfectly. "Oh, don't give me that look Spike.", Twilight says as she jumps off the bed and puts the dragon on her back, using her levitation spell. "Besides, if all goes well, you'll get a special gift from your beloved Rarity", she says, turning back to Spike, giving him a wink.

"Uuuh, am I gonna need an adu-", Spike starts apprehensively, only for Twilight to cut him off by shouting, "I am an adult!" Before teleporting them both away.

'Oh boy...', was the last thing the little assistant thought as he was teleported away by his older companion.

Author's Note

Sorry if this seems a bit sillier than the others.

I was kind of in a silly mode when I typed it up.:twilightblush:

Pandering Is Magic

The wind picks up slightly as Spike rests on Twilight's back as she soars over Ponyville, a content and smug smile on her face, occasionally letting lose a disturbing giggle, an expression that Spike has learned to always dread and question.

"Okay Twilight, what's the deal?" Spike asks his friend as he gets a better grip on her, seeing that they were about to go in for a landing. "Be patient, Spike.", his guardian predictably says as she swoops down and lands in front of Rarity's Boutique, a smirk on her face all the while.
Spike hoops off Twilight's and goes up to knock on the dress maker's door, but stops just short when he hears sad piano music coming from inside.

He presses his ear against the door of the boutique to hear more and is greeted by the all too familiar, and far too disturbing, sound of Rarity inhaling ice cream.

"Oh, geez...", Spike sighs out before swinging the door open to see Rarity laying back on her lounge couch with her faced stuff inside an ice cream container. "Come on Rarity, we've been over this!" Spike shouts as he runs over to try and pry the tub of ice cream from the distraught mare.

The white equine immediately wrapped her magic around the container when she felt Spike try to pull it away. "Moo, leev mee uloan!" Rarity shouts with a mouth full of the white and creamy goodness.

This soon sparks a mini-tug-of-war between the two until a certain lavender alicorn interferes, an aura of purple magic surrounds the ice-cream container from in between the two, and flung it into Rarity's trash bin.

"Come on, Rarity!" Spike whined as the purple maned mare crossed her forelegs with a pout on her face, her mascara still slightly running.

"What's got you so down in the dumps anyways?", Twilight inquires while stepping forward to council her friend. But the unicorn simply gestures toward a door to Twilight's left, the door to Rarity's, "Inspiration Room".

Twilight trots over to the door, leaving her assistant to try and counsel her distressed friend, and enters to see what it was that upset Rarity.

The room was cluttered, disorganized, and smelled faintly of Dior perfume, as per usual. Then she noticed what was out of place, pieces of manikins were shattered and scattered everywhere; the stands they were situated on were bent way beyond repair.

'Oh no..., Twilight thought as she put a hoof to her mouth. 'These were Rarity's favorite/only manikins! She even gave them little names, no wonder she's so sad.. The alicorn suddenly sets a determined look on her face.

'As a good friend, it's my responsibility to be there for her.. She turns around and walks back into the main room, ready to join her friends on the couch, only to be stopped by a rather unusual sight.

Rarity was sitting upright on the couch with Spike wrapped in her fore legs, his face was lined up with hers, and her eyes were bring with tears.

"Oh Spikey-Wikey!" Rarity squeals as she brings Spike in for a tight hug, pressing his face into her chest, and crying a few tears of relief, "I don't know what I'd do without you.", she confesses as she shakes from left to right.

"No problem, Rarity, it's what friends do.", came out Spikes muffled voice from the unicorn's chest; with a light chuckle, Twilight pulls Spike away from Rarity with her magic and sits beside her on the couch.

"Sorry to break up the moment Rarity, but I think that you were suffocating him a little.", Twilight remarks as she takes a seat on the other side of Rarity.

The unicorn blushed a little at the comment whilst she was wiping away her tears, "I suppose you're right, darling.", Rarity says as she fixes her hair with a little magic.

"What did you say to her anyways, Spike?", Twilight questioned while eyeing her little brother. "Well I-", Spike started, but was quickly interrupted by Rarity clamping his mouth shut with her magic.

"I would actually like to keep that a secret, Darling", the unicorn says as she cleans up her mascara.

Twilight gives Rarity a questioning look for moment before deciding to drop it, this wasn't the reason she came here anyway. "Okay, then let's get to why me and Spike came here in the first place.", the alicorn says as she lifted both Rarity and Spike in the air and put them beside each other.

"I want you to pretend to be Spike's girlfriend and I want Spike to pretend to be a great warrior.", Twilight says as her hair begins to split a little. "Okaaay, Darling, why?", Rarity questions an incredulous tone in her voice as she slowly rotates in the air.

"To appease the Yaks of course!", she stated as her pupils dilated significantly. "The Yaks will relate more to a warrior and they'd understand Spike's violent outburst if they knew his significant other was in the room when they were going on a rampage.", she finished explained her distorted logic with a little giggle.

"Oh wow, Twi, even your fanfics aren't thi-", the little dragon is quickly cut off by Twilight shouting, "You promised to never tell!", she hollers while pointing an accusing hoof towards him.

"Please don't tell she actually writes those.", Rarity says while giving Spike a sidelong glance, "I really wish I could.", Spike says in a tired tone before they're both suddenly being pulled through the store's front door and outside with Twilight in front of them.

"Ugh, I don't have time this!" Twilight comments in an exasperated tone as she takes off into the air with both Spike and Rarity in tow.

"Sooo, should we try and stop her?" Rarity inquires, looking directly at the little assistant as they went through the air. "Nah, to tired, and I haven't really got much else to do today.", Spike responds while shrugging.

"Besides, I'd say this is actually a marked improvement over the last time she freaked out", Spike says with some snark.

They both share a nervous little fit of laughter at that comment.

Author's Note

1)Sorry for the exceedingly long update time, some financial things came up that needed to be taken care of first.

2)Updates should be a lot more consistent from now on.

3)I promise this is as silly as the fic will get; I don't want to go too crazy with it.

Simple yet ingenious

Twilight was soaring through the skies of Ponyville, just above the height of most houses, dragging Spike and Rarity along with a simple levitation spell. She was on a bee-line to her castle until she heard a certain pink, bubbly, and slightly chubby pony heading in the opposite direction.

Pinkie was galloping along down the road toward the train station with two saddle bags on her sides, with an overly dramatic serious look on her face.

"Oh, hey, it's Pinkie!", Spike announces as he notices them turning around and going in for a landing.

"Hello, Pinkie darling." Rarity says as they land in front of the pink earthpony, "What has got you in such a hurry?"

Pinkie begins bouncing up and down and begins ramble about her "brilliant" plan, "Well, first I was freaking out about entertaining the Yaks, then Gummy gave me the most super idea!" She exclaims while squishing her cheeks together. "Just go all the way to Yakyakistan and bring back something authentic!" The party-pony finished with a slightly smug pose.

Spike looked to his guardian, Twilight, wondering why she was staying so quiet during this whole exchange between the unicorn and earthpony. What he saw was a very stressed out looking alicorn, "Nononono!" Twilight hurriedly says as she rushes toward the earth pony and grabs her by the shoulders.

"You can't go all the way to Yakyakistan!" She exclaims as she starts shaking her friend. "It would take over three days to get there and the Yaks won't wait that long for your party!" The alicorn with her voice cracking slightly.

"Really? By my calculations it would've only taken most of the afternoon.", Pinkie cheerfully states, which sets the alicorn off on another mini-tangent.

Spike and Rarity then hear what sounds like a sonic boom only a couple blocks away, before seeing the blur of a cyan colored pegasus flying in their direction.

"What's with Pinkie and Twilight trying to out shriek each other?" Rainbow said as she covered her ears while hovering over the drake and unicorn. The pegasus then lands between the two and begins messaging her temples, "Seriously, I heard them all the way from Cloudsdale."

"They're arguing about how to appease the Yaks.", Spike replied as he was contemplating on how to break up the two ponies, "And doing so in a rather uncouth way, might I add.", Rarity disdainfully commented afterwards. Obviously noting Pinkie's habit of raising her voice to insane volumes and Twilight's tendency to be a little condescending.

"Whatever it is, it's giving me a headache and it needs to stop now.", she says as she trotted towards the arguing friends. "Girls!" Dashie shouts as she pushes the girls apart from each other before saying. "Could you please stop the public shouting match?"

They're initially stunned by the sudden intrusion, but then the both of them tried to explain their plans to Rainbow, hoping that she would be a sort of tie breaker, but only serve to confuse the girl.

"...I think I've got an idea.", Spike says absentmindedly.

"Hmm? What is it darling?" Rarity says, bending down so she was eye level with her small admirer.

"Don't really have time explain; it's only getting worse over with those three." He responds as he as he walks around the unicorn and towards the other three.

He stood with his head held high and cleared his throat, "Excuse me, if I may?"

The three girls turn toward the sudden inclusion of a fourth voice.

"Okay, here me out.", Spike says raising his arms in front of him, palms forward, "The Yaks came here to visit a foreign country, right?"

The girls nod in response, slightly confused at the obvious statement.

"If so, then why would they want to see us try and imitate their culture?", Spike questions, "Wouldn't they rather see our culture?", he elaborates with a raised eyebrow. "You know, the culture of the people they're trying to befriend?"

The equines simply stare for a while before Twilight let's loose a drawn out gasp, "Why didn't I think of that!?" She exclaims, smacking her hoof against her own forehead. The alicorn then suddenly grabs Pinkie and brings here mere centimeters away from her face, "Pinkie, we need to arrange a town-wide party, pronto!"

"Weeeelll, we could use my basement where I have info on everypony in Ponyvil-", she's suddenly cut off by Twilight gabbing her side and teleporting away in a bright flash of lavender light.

"... Can I go home and take a nap now?", Rainbow asked, obviously tired from the Yaks and trying to understand her friend's insanity, just wanting to sleep the day away.

"Uh, yeah sure, I guess I'll see you later Dash.", Spike said as he waved toward a haggard Rainbow Dash about to take off.

"Later, Spike.", Rainbow says before rocketing into the air and towards her cloud house.

The white mare and dragon shared a moment of much welcomed silence before Rarity broke it by saying. "Sooo, you want to go to my place for some brunch?" She ask while draping a leg around Spike's shoulders.

"*sigh* I'd love to.", Spike happily accepted as they walked back to the boutique.

Author's Note

And with that my first Fan-Fic is finished.

I am proud to say that it was slightly above average. :rainbowdetermined2: