Scootaloo stood against the wall at the back of her room. Her rear end touched it and her tail was pressed flat against the hard surface. Tears glistening in her eyes, she looked into the face of the blue pegasus with the rainbow mane in front of her.
Everything was over. Rainbow Dash had just found out about something that Scootaloo never wanted her to know.
Something despicable. Something she could never let anypony know, not even her. And by looking in the face of her big sister, she could see why.
The expression of the older pegasus showed anger. More than that, it showed rage, mixed in with a portion of disappointment. It was an expression Scootaloo had never seen adorning Rainbow Dash's face before. She had never looked at her that way. Never. But now things were different. Everything was different. Now that Rainbow Dash knew about it, it wouldn't be the same anymore. Ever.
But at least she got to try. She had to say something, trying to save the situation and to make Rainbow Dash understand. She would understand it, right? She was her big sister, after all. Not really her big sister, Scootaloo knew that. But she could always feel that there was something between them. And since the night at Winsome Falls, during their very first camping trip together, they were connected with a bond so strong that the bond between blood-related sisters couldn't be stronger. She would surely forgive her. She just had to try.
Scootaloo gulped. She eased her body a little, then she began her attempt to explain.
“R-Rainbow Dash. I..... I.....” She already began to lose her composure. Scootaloo pressed her eyes shut and shook her head. “It's not how you think it is!”, she shouted at her with a tear-filled voice, gathering all her energy.
“Not how I think it is?!”, Rainbow Dash repeated what Scootaloo said before she could continue, her loud voice carrying the same amount of rage that her face showed.
Scootaloo gasped in fear and stumbled back a little, her tail getting even more pressed against the wall behind her.
“How could I not know how it is? It's a clear case! Everypony knows it, Scootaloo! Everypony! And they are talking about it! Just on my way here I was asked by three different ponies what I'm going to do with you now! Three ponies! And I didn't know what to answer!”
While Rainbow Dash was speaking, Scootaloo's face became more and more distorted from pain. The words hurt. They hurt her very much. And she didn't know what to do.
She couldn't explain it to Rainbow Dash. She just couldn't. Even if the pegasus mare would allow her to explain everything, Scootaloo could feel that she just hadn't the strength to perform this task. Every word Rainbow Dash just said was draining her of energy a little more. And now she just couldn't take it anymore.
Her face a ruin of it's former self now, grief deforming it and tears streaming over it in thick, salty rivers, she collapsed on the floor. Burying her head into her hooves, the distraught filly began to weep bitterly. Her crying filled the room around them, but Rainbow Dash didn't listen to it.
Where she would have felt wrapped into a hug in a situation like this usually, the only thing that greeted Scootaloo now was the suddenly so harsh-sounding voice of her sister and another rage-filled talk.
“Do you even understand in what kind of situation you have brought me, Scootaloo? Ponies ask me what to do! They expect a decision from me! And I don't know how to make this decision!”
The longer Rainbow Dash was talking, the more her yelling turned into screaming. She was screaming at Scootaloo now, another thing she never did under normal circumstances. But the circumstances weren't normal anymore and Rainbow Dash's screaming that cut into her ears made Scootaloo realize that even more. Her sobbing became louder, but Rainbow Dash still didn't care in her fury.
“I am the Element of Loyalty, but how should I decide between being loyal to you and being loyal to Ponyville? How?! Can you answer this?”
Of course she couldn't. The only answer she could give Rainbow Dash was more sobbing and crying muffled by her hooves. It was only now that Rainbow Dash calmed down a little. The anger in her face became gradually replaced with an exhausted expression, but the disappointment stayed.
Rainbow Dash sat down on her haunches and let out a sigh. She cast her eyes on the crying little pegasus in front of her. “What should I do, Scoots? What should I do?”, her voice rang out to her, weak and desperated in it's tone now.
Hearing Rainbow Dash calling her with the cool nickname she gave her, Scootaloo adjusted her hooves and dared to peek at her carefully. It was barely enough for one of her eyes to look over them, but she could clearly see the disappointed look in Rainbow Dash's eyes. She could feel it piercing through her heart and, letting out another sob, hid her face under her hooves completely again and resumed crying.
Rainbow Dash let out another sigh, then she got up on her hooves, did a step forward and carefully began to remove Scootaloo's hooves from her little face. She could see that Scootaloo's body was shivering, but still, it barely caused any feelings inside of her. What she felt was anger, disappointment and confusion. But after finding out what happened and with the pressure other ponies put on her now, she could not sense anything of the love she usually felt for her little surrogate sister. Where it once was, there was only coldness now.
As she had freed Scootaloo's face, she put a hoof under her chin and slowly lifted it up, forcing Scootaloo to look at her. Her face was still distorted by the grief she felt right now, to an amount where Rainbow Dash could almost not believe that she looked into the face of a little, ten year old filly.
“Why did you never tell me about it?”, she began to address Scootaloo again, her voice still sounding weak from the screaming earlier. Rainbow Dash moved her other hoof to Scootaloo's face and began to wipe away the tears that were still streaming down her cheeks, almost to no avail. “Why?”, she asked again, after having refused to stop the persistent rivers of tears.
Scootaloo couldn't answer this question either. Even though Rainbow Dash knew everything now, it was impossible for her to talk about it. Even just thinking about the secret she had hurt. The former secret. Because everypony in Ponyville knew it now. Instead, she was asking the question that was coursing through her mind now and for which she needed an answer desperately, even if it should be one she couldn't take.
“D-Do you still love me, Rainbow Dash?” Having the sentence barely finished, she reached out with her tiny hooves and approached her sister to wrap them around her, out of a sudden desire for comfort. But in the middle of her movement, Rainbow Dash stopped her. She put a hoof on her chest and pushed her back, slow, but with a persistence that scared Scootaloo. A new, strong shiver went through her body. She sniffed. “R-Rainbow Dash?”
“Not now”, the pegasus mare answered. “I want that you leave. I have to think about all of this. And I don't want to see you again until I have made a decision.”
These words cut through Scootaloo like a sharp knife. Feeling the coldness in Rainbow Dash's words filling her up inside, she was not able to answer.
Shakingly, she rose to her hooves and walked past Rainbow Dash, who did not grace her with one look anymore, her head hanging low, her ears dropped and her eyes still producing more tears. As she had left the room, without daring to turn around to Rainbow Dash one more time, yet asking her the same question again, she began to run. Sobbing again now, she darted down the stairs, more by instinct than by looking at them, as everything around her was a blur now, and rushed out of the door of her house.
Gallopping away from it, the glances of ponies who stood near the entrance followed her path. Their eyes were full of disgust and hate and expressed what terrible secret about the young pegasus filly had leaked out into the little town.
Scootaloo couldn't see it. Eyes shut tight, she just ran.
Her life would be much harder now. And this thought was unbearable for her.
