A Classy Game of Chess

by Lunatone

Rating: everyone
Tags: Spike, Comedy, Twilight Sparkle, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Rainbow Dash
Length: 3362

Twlight Challenges Rainbow Dash to a game of chess. Things get intense and silly. Who will win?

When Rainbow Dash complains about being bored in the library, after finding out that Twilight doesn't have the new Daring Do novel, an annoyed Twilight challenges the Pegasus to a game of chess in hopes that it cures her boredom. Suffice to say it not only cures her boredom, but it also makes her laugh. A lot.

Editors: DemonBrightSpirit, Twidashforever, and The Wandering Bard

Published 2015-07-06 01:30:01 UTC
Last updated 2015-11-19 02:12:34 UTC

Chapter One

Rainbow Dash stood in front of the Golden Oak Library. Letting a murmur escape her lips, she glanced down at her saddlebag; several posters jutted out from it, and a couple of old Daring Do novels weighed it down. Hoping to snag the newly-released Daring Do novel, she went to the local bookstore, but they’d told her that every single copy had already been sold. In retaliation, she bought all the posters pertaining to the new novel in hopes that it would enrage other customers.

Now her only chance was Twilight. She definitely had to have it. It’d be a load of horse apples if she didn’t.

Taking a deep breath, Rainbow knocked on the door, though the rhythmic action was interrupted by a voice within.

“You don’t need to knock, you know. This is a public library,” came Twilight’s voice.

“Heh, right... silly me,” Rainbow said, pushing through to the Ponyville Library, after which she made her way to the bookshelf labelled “D”.

Twilight was writing something on her desk, but she averted her attention to her friend. “Hey, Rainbow Dash. How’s it going?”

“Not good. Say, do you have the new Daring Do novel that just came out today?” Rainbow subconsciously placed her saddlebag on the ground while she continued to search the shelf.

“I uh...” Twilight rubbed the back of her head and looked away. Darn. I knew she would ask that.

“Well, do you?” Rainbow tilted her head as she waited for a response.

“You see, the thing is...”

“Go on.”

“Somepony signed it out an hour ago. It won’t be back until next Wednesday. I’m sorry, Rainbow Dash.”

“What?” Rainbow pulled Twilight in, their noses touching. The look on Twilight’s face was horrified while the look on Rainbow’s face was absurdly ludicrous and shocked. “How is this possible? How could you let this happen?” The pegasus shook Twilight crazily while keeping her eyes on her. “Do you have any idea what you’ve done‽”

Twilight teleported away from Rainbow’s hold, reappearing in the relative safety near the staircase. Stars orbited her head, her eyes swirled all over the place, her hooves shook, and her mane was a mess. Within five seconds, she collapsed to the ground.

Eventually, Twilight picked herself up and asked, “What in Equestria are you talking about, Rainbow Dash?”

“I’m talking about how you let some bozo sign out the book. It just came out, and it’s already gone! Didn’t you read it?” The pegasus crept closer to her friend, though, this time, without the wild behaviour.

“Of course I did. It was the first thing that I did this morning...what’s gotten into you, Rainbow Dash? You seem...tense.”

Of course she was tense. Usually she would be the first one to lay hoof on a newly released Daring Do novel, but by the time she got to the bookstore, a line of ponies a mile long were already waiting. It was cider season all over again. Now she desperately wanted to read the latest tale of Daring Do. That’s all.

“Don’t you mean tender?” Rainbow asked. What are you a bozo? How can you be tender? Sometimes, I wonder...

“Huh? I don’t understand the question,” Twilight said, looking dazed. She put a hoof on her friend’s shoulder. “Look, Rainbow Dash, I know you’re anxious to read the new novel, but think about it: It’ll be returned next week, which means you can take it home to read. But until then, you have to wait.”

Rainbow pulled back from her friend’s touch. Then she sat near her saddlebag, looked at her friend. Sighed. “Yeah, yeah, you’re right. Sorry about overreacting like that. I just get so damn excited about something like this, you know?”

“I get it. No need to be sorry, Rainbow Dash.” Twilight's eye wandered off to the rolled up scrolls in Rainbow’s saddle bag. Raising a hoof towards the saddlebags, she asked, “What’s that?”

“Oh, these?” Rainbow slid the bag out of her reach and grabbed the posters with her teeth, then set them down. “Well, you know how I totally love anything to do with the Daring Do series?”

Twilight nodded.

“Well, I decided to buy all of the posters for the newest book since I wasn’t able to get an actual copy. Thought it would be better than not getting it. Wanna see some of them?”

“Alright, sure.” Twilight joined her friend, which put a smile on Rainbow’s face. Twilight unraveled the posters with her magic and spread them out on the floor. They were magnificent, to say the least.

“Talk about artsy,” they both said at the same time, after which there came a laugh from the two ponies.

“Did that seriously just happen?” Rainbow asked, a tittering built up in her throat.

“I guess it did,” Twilight said. “So, listen. As much as I like spending time with one of my best friends, I have to get back to writing a letter to Princess Celestia. Do you mind?”

Rainbow shook her head. “Not at all. Do what you gotta do. Mind if I stay here?”

“You can stay here as long as you want.” A smile crossed the Twilight’s face. “Just give me thirty or so minutes and I’ll be done.”

“Sure thing,” Rainbow said, turning her attention to the posters laid out flat.

Twilight took a deep breath and went back to her desk, after which she leaned forward in writing mode.

Fifteen or so minutes later, Rainbow could be found twiddling her hooves around, waiting patiently for Twilight to finish writing her letter. She wondered what Twilight was writing about, and, more specifically, why she was writing it so intensely. The question of what was going through the her mind intrigued the pegasus, to say the least. Then Twilight giggled.

I wonder what’s going through that savvy head of hers, Rainbow thought. Could she be laughing at my crazy reaction earlier? Nah, it can’t be that.

Twilight sensed that she was being watched, so she peeked at her friend. “Rainbow, you’re distracting me. Please don’t stare at me. You’re making me very tense.”

“Right, sorry. My bad,” Rainbow said. She looked away.

Twilight, dunking her quill in the inkwell, resumed her writing.

In a way, Rainbow kind of found Twilight to be adorkable when she wrote with such intensity. The way she had a quill in her magic, the way she inscribed her text on a parchment, and the way she had her tongue sticking out of her mouth as she tried to concentrate, all gave Rainbow the more reason to find her “adorkable”. Without even knowing, Rainbow let a loud sigh creep pass her mouth—because of the thoughts that were sailing around in her head—which unintentionally disrupted Twilight.

Twilight dropped the quill and shook her head at Rainbow’s impatience. “I’m almost done, Rainbow Dash. Just a few more minutes, okay?”

“Yeah, yeah, hurry up, please,” Rainbow blurted out. She didn’t mean it.

Twilight went back to her adamant task.

There was a clock in the room, and it was driving Rainbow bonkers to say the least; the obnoxious noise of the clock’s ticking only fuelled her impatience even more, making her more wildly susceptible to madness. Rainbow kept moving around, as if she had ants in her fur, unable to sit still. She really craved Twilight’s attention, but she couldn’t have it now, which made her even more impatient.

Stupid clock. If I could, I’d smash that thing to pieces!

Tick-tock, tick-tock... The clock still clicked, and Rainbow slowly lost her mind.

“Are you done yet?” Rainbow yelled, eager to break the tense silence. She lay flat on the floor, her hooves and body all twisted out of sheer boredom.

“Yeah, yeah, cool your feathers,” Twilight said, quickly jotting down a few more words before rolling the letter up.

“About time.”

“Hey, it was a very important letter and I had to concentrate.”

“Yeah, yeah, same as always. So what you wanna do?” Rainbow got up from the floor, a smile marking her face.

“How about we play a board game? Maybe it’ll help clear your head from Daring Do,” Twilight said.

“Okay, what do you have in mind?”

“How about chess? Unless you’re not up for the challenge. I mean, we can always play snakes and ladders if you’re up for something easier.” A grin crossed Twilight's face as she focused her attention to her friend.

“Now, wait just a second.” Rainbow forged the most friendly yet intimidating expression possible, and she aimed it at Twilight. “Do you really think I’d pass on a challenge? Besides, I’m one of the best chess players out there.”

Twilight’s facial nuances twitched because of the tittering that was building in her throat. Then she said, “You’re bluffing.”

“Wanna bet?”

“I bet you don’t even know how to formulate a strategy in a game of chess.” Twilight walked toward a shelf with several board games atop, and she then pulled a chess set off it.

Rainbow crossed her hooves, her arrogant smirk still on her face. “Of course I do. It’s all about speed and eliminating the nearest piece.”

“You sure about that?” Twilight placed the set on a nearby table, opened the box, and placed the board down. With her magic, she then placed the pieces on the correct squares.

Rainbow gulped down a mouthful of air, then said, “Couldn’t be more sure.”

“Well, then, shall we play?”

“You’re on, Twilight. Get ready to lose.”

Chapter Two

Despite Rainbow’s unchecked ambition to conquering Twilight in chess, the latter was doing better than expected. Rainbow had made smooth manoeuvres with her knights, and, as a result, Twilight lost a bishop, a rook, and a few pawns—but that didn’t discourage Twilight in the least.

And to make things a little more worthwhile and interesting, Twilight and Rainbow made a deal. It turned out that Twilight had purchased a limited, collector’s edition of the new Daring Do novel, and the deal was, if Rainbow beat Twilight in a game of chess, it would be Rainbow’s forever. If the pegasus lost, however, she’d not only lose the limited edition, but she’d also have to spend more time at the library in keeping Twilight company during the weekends. Rainbow wasn’t opposed to the latter, but she was opposed to the former.

“Knight to E5,” Twilight said, using her magic to move the white piece. Her mind stopped to think about the move she had made. “Looks about right. Your turn, Rainbow Dash.”

“Oh, this’ll be easy,” Rainbow said, a cheeky smirk crossing her face. She hastily took hold of her knight, only to be stopped by Twilight’s magic.

“Rainbow Dash, stop rushing your moves. The point of chess is to challenge the mind by taking your time, but not too much time, and anticipating your opponent’s next move, which is why you have to make the correct move that’ll leave your opponent in a jam, and—”

“Twilight,” Rainbow said, “you worry too much. Like I said, chess is all about speed and knocking out as many pieces as you can as fast as you can.”

“No it isn’t. It’s about precision and—”

“Can I make my move?”

“Oh, sorry,” Twilight said, freeing Rainbow’s piece. “I won’t interfere with your ‘plan’. Keep playing.”

“I will.” Rainbow moved her black knight to B5. “Hehe, that’ll show her.”

“Show me what?”

“Uh, nothing. Did I say that aloud? Pretend like you didn’t hear anything.”

Twilight exhaled, then rolled her eyes. “Pawn to C4.”

“Oh, yeah, this one's a keeper.” Rainbow advanced her bishop to C4, essentially eliminating Twilight’s pawn. To Rainbow, it was a moment of prideless victory since she had conquered another piece from Twilight; but then she realized that it would come bite her in the backend if Twilight were smart enough, which she undoubtedly was.

“Knight to C4,” Twilight said, moving her knight to remove Rainbow’s bishop. After that, Twilight had a saucy smirk on her face. “What’d I tell you? You can’t be rushing moves like that.” A giggle escaped from Twilight.

“Hey, no fair,” Rainbow said.

“What are you saying, Rainbow Dash? That was a legit move. And a mistake on your part. Sorry.”

“Oh, you’re so gonna lose, Sparkle Butt!”

Twilight gasped. “You didn’t just call me that!”

“You bet I did. Now stop talking, you’re distracting me.”

For the next while, Rainbow had made some irrational, brash moves. While some did surprise Twilight, the results were inevitable, at least if Rainbow didn’t pause to consider her next few moves more carefully. She had lost both her beloved knights, a rook, two pawns, and her last bishop while Twilight had lost a knight, and two more pawns.

Still, even though Rainbow knew, to some extent, she was going to lose, so she found silly ways to stall herself from the humiliation of defeat.

“Queen to E3. Check!” Twilight said, her voice full of confident.

“Uh, king to D8,” Rainbow said, moving her king. “That should do it.”

“Are you sure about that, Rainbow? Bishop to—”

“Twilight! Look behind you! There’s a small swarm of bees.”

Twilight whipped her head around while saying, “What in Equestria are you talking about, Rainbow Dash?”

For the very little time Rainbow had, she switched around some pieces, albeit in a way that Twilight wouldn’t notice. Or so she hoped.

When Twilight turned back around, she saw a huge smile on Rainbow’s face. “What are you doing, Rainbow? You better not be messing around with the pieces.”

“Me? What? No. Never. I’d never cheat, Twilight. I swear!”

Twilight’s eyes were scrunching down, as if she were a detective suspicious of one’s motives. “I got my eye on you, Rainbow. Now where were we? My turn right? Queen to B6.”

When the piece landed on the B6 square, Rainbow bursted out in peals of laughter. “Oh, my gosh, Twilight. And you tell me not to rush. Pawn to B6.” Rainbow grabbed Twilight’s white queen. “Looks like like the Sparkle Butt doesn’t have a queen anymore.”

“What the…how is that possible? There was never a pawn there. Rainbow Dash, you did move around the pieces, didn’t you?”

“No way!” Rainbow failed the urge to smile widely as possible, only making her guilt more obvious. “Okay, maybe I moved one piece, but, still, you gotta give me some credit. You didn’t even notice the small change, and you’re the one who’s suppose to notice every little change in detail. Am I right or wrong?”

Twilight gritted her teeth. Truthfully, she was frustrated and angry with Rainbow. If steam were inside her right now, she’d be ready to burst, like a pipe. “Oh, you’re impossible, sometimes, Rainbow Dash.”

“Me? What about you and all the time you took at the beginning of our game? You took three minutes to make the first move. And you’re the one that said you shouldn’t take too much time in chess.”

“You shouldn’t, it’s just that—”

“Excuses, excuses, excuses,” Rainbow said. “Enough bickering, you gonna make the next move?”

“Argh. Fine. But I’m not taking my eye off of you, Lightning Butt. You’re. Going. Down.”

“Bring it.”

For the next ten minutes, Rainbow and Twilight were battling it out as if it were for their very lives, though the battle didn’t last long when Rainbow got a pawn to Twilight’s end of the board, promoting the pawn to a knight, based off Rainbow’s choice. “Oh, yeah, this is gonna be an easy win now.”

“Don’t get ahead of yourself. My rook will take it out as soon as it comes into play.”

“You wouldn’t dare,” Rainbow said, scrunching her eyes.

“Try me.”

And so, Rainbow promoted her little pawn to a knight, only for it to be taken down by Twilight’s rook. The pegasus called out Twilight’s faux bluff. “Okay, so maybe you weren’t bluffing. Oh, man, this game just got ten times harder.”

“I told you, Rainbow Dash, I’m gonna win this one. Why don’t you give up?”

“Never!”

“Pawn to D2. Check!”

“Oh, no. King to B1.”

“Rook to B8.”

“King to A1.”

“Rook to A8.”

“King to B1.”

“Seriously?” Rainbow asked. “Is this how it’s gonna be now?”

“What else do you want me to do? You keep checking me. I have to do something.”

Rainbow sighed. “Queen to G6. Check. Again.”

“King to B2.”

“Rook to B8.”

“King to A1.”

“I got you now Sparkle Butt. Queen to B1. Checkmate.”

“Oh, Rainbow, when will you learn. Rook to B1.”

“What the. No way! I checkmated you!”

“No you didn’t. You forgot I had a rook on my side. Your fault.”

“Pawn to C2. I only have two pawns left, and I won’t have you take ’em,” Rainbow said.

“It’s not your pawns you should be worried about, it’s your king. Knight to C7. Check.”

“Uh, king to F8.”

“Knight to A8. I’ll just take that, thank you kindly.”

“What? You gotta be kidding me! Now I only have two pawns and a king? What am I supposed to do?”

“Plan your next move as carefully as possible, Rainbow Butt.”

“This game is far from over, Sparkle Butt, mark my words. Pawn to E2.”

Twilight started laughing. “Did you forget I have a pawn at your end? Pawn to C8. Time for queening.”

Rainbow cocked her head. “What now?”

“It’s when I promote my pawn to a queen.”

“Like ponyfeathers! That’s not a rule.”

“Yes, it is. If a pawn from the opposing side makes it to the other end, the player can promote it to be a queen, bishop, rook, or knight. Now, can I please have my queen back? You get to keep this pawn.,” Twilight said, her voice sounding alluring yet competitive.

“Fine.” Rainbow handed Twilight back here queen.

“Thanks. Your turn.”

“Pawn to—”

“Um, Rainbow, your king is in check.”

Rainbow’s face was almost the colour of a blood tomato. “Ugh, king to G7.”

“Knight to B6,” Twilight said.

“Pawn to G1. I call my queen!”

“Alright, Rainbow, here you go.”

“Thanks. Oh, and by the way, you’re king is in check.”

“Uh, right… King to E2.”

“Hehe, Queen to B1. I’ll take that rook of yours.”

“Queen to C2. Looks likes Rainbow Butt is all out of pawns.”

“And it looks like Sparkle Butt is about to be out of another queen. “Queen to B2.”

“What? No way. How did I make a mistake like that? I-I. That’s impossible!”

Rainbow started laughing. “And you said you’re the one who doesn’t rush their next move. Right…By the way, Twi, your king is in check.”

“King to E1,” Twilight said, her voice losing all confidence at the hope of winning.

“Queen to B1. Check, Twilight.”

Twilight let out a vexed sigh. “King to F2.”

“I gotcha now, Sparkle Butt! Queen to B7. Got your knight, and you’re in check again. Now all you have is your king.”

Truth be told, Twilight didn’t expect to lose to Rainbow Dash, of all ponies, especially since she was the one that said chess was all about speed and eliminating the nearest pieces. Turns out she wasn’t wrong about that. Twilight caved in all hope of winning, and knocked her king down with a hoof, before saying, “I forfeit. You win, Rainbow Dash. Either way it would’ve been a stalemate in the end.”

Rainbow’s eyes widened, far past their sockets, and she launched herself in the air, after which she hoof pumped. “Aw, yeah, I beat Twilight Sparkle in chess! That means—”

“Yep, the novel is all yours, Rainbow, once it’s returned,” Twilight said as she hopped off the stool she was sitting on.

Spike came in. “What’s with all the noise in here?”

“Oh, nothing, I just beat the smartest pony I know in a game of chess. I think I deserve a medal for such a feat,” Rainbow said, a cocky grin crossing her face.

“Eh, it’s nothing special, really. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to go help Rarity with something. Later.” Spike left.

“Uh, Twilight, what did he mean by ‘it’s nothing special really’?”

“Oh, nothing…just that I always lose to Spike.”