...I Would Put "U" And "I" Together.

by overlord-flinx

Rating: mature
Tags: Alternate Universe, Other, Romance, Octavia, Comedy, Sex, DJ P0N-3, Human, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 3820

Two worlds coming into one. And in spite of differences that once divided the two, they now only go by the other's beat.

The day has finally come: Vinyl and Octavia's wedding. The tuxes are tucked, the dressed are fitted, the church is decorated, and the reception awaits. So many pieces working together in a flawless synchronization for the benefit of two true lovers. It's their day; everything has to be just perfect.

That's why the less Vinyl and Octavia know about the set-up to their perfect wedding, the better.

Humanized characters.

The entire story is both made up of POVs from different characters, and stories of their participation in the wedding.

Art done by Bakki.

Published 2015-07-10 17:10:01 UTC
Last updated 2023-12-27 21:35:30 UTC

Chapter One: If I Could Rearrange the Alphabet...

Vinyl.

I read once, a long time ago, that everyone's life begins not with a bang, but with a whimper... I think I may have read it wrong because my life was, has been, and always will be starting, ending, and rolling on with a big bang, bang, bang!

I was pretty young when I said all that. I had to do some growing up since then. Had to become a man... A man with girly parts and boobs. But -you know- a man. God... That was so long ago. What's it been? One, two...? Four months? Yeah. Let's see... It was snowing, Octavia already got her presents from Santa, and I remember I was drunk the week before... So, that was a little into January. Now the snow's all gone, flowers are blooming like a guy's woody in the morning, so it's been a few months.

Yeah, I don't know where I was going with that either. Sorry. I know our talks are usually all kinds of messy; but it's never this hectic, right? I just can't keep myself wrapped up right now. I'm about ready to burst. Seriously, you better step back because I am just gonna be jizzing everywhere any minute now. I don't know how I'm gonna pull of jizzing everywhere without a schlong, but I'll find a way...

What were we on about again? GAH! I'm just too excited to keep focused! I'm getting married! Me, married. To a hot, sexy, talented musical genius and lover; Octavia by name. It was a hell of a road getting here to the church... But we're here. All dressed up, tucked up, and made-up. I mean -sure- I'm getting a little choked up with what I'm wearing; I think Rare tailored it too tight thinking the stress was gonna make me lose a few pounds. Spoiler: I never get stressed... Never... Stop thinking of times I was stressed! You're stressing me out!

Anyway, the clothes are a bit tight. And this ain't really my first choice of places to get hitched. My first choice was a drive through. But, Gramps said getting hitched is all about "compromise". He used a lot of bigger, fancier words; but I forgot most of them. But I did remember "compromise". I heard a lot of that this past month. Compromise this, compromise that, compromise on the food, compromise on the guests. But, I'd be lying if I said it was torture finding a compromise. Tavi had to meet me on just as many comps as I had to do for her.

Planning the wedding was actually pretty damn fun... Well, for me. Probably for Octavia too. But, we have our reasons for that. Won't bore you on that one. After all, we're gathered here today to get two hot bodies together for keeps and shit. And I'm one of those hot bods. So, if you'll excuse me... I have an Octavia to get wed to.

Octavia.

Six years. Within a simple six years, so many things could very well occur.

You can fall in love in six simple years. You can get married in six simple years as well. Someone could change their whole entire reason for being in six years.

And yet, you can meet your one true love and know it in just one day and spend six years trying to realize it. Time is such a funny thing... Almost as funny as silly, fickle emotions. One moment you have it all, and you never wish to have it go. The next, you're in the empty streets wondering where and when your life crumbled from where you thought the precipice of perfection was; only to realize that what you thought was the peak was merely the first incline. In short, life changes very quickly and unexpectedly. No one can predict it (unless you're Lyra), and no one can plan for it. That was a hard lesson for me to learn.

It may come as a surprise, but I like things to be in a more systematic control. Everything has a place, and every place has something to it. No more, no less. I was raised on that. But, here I am... My plans were to get married to a wealthy man who could bring me into the inner circles of higher society, escalate myself through the ranks of musical talents that filled the classical and refined fields, and live soundly once I reached the pinnacle of all that. Those were the plans my family instilled in me.

Now... I'm going woefully unsure of what's to come into a marriage to an eccentric woman with no plans of her own; our only expectation being to live a modest life in an apartment while living paycheck-to-paycheck and noodles.

Ah... How happy I am to be living this life now. I mean that with all my heart and soul. It won't be a glorious life; definitely not. But it will be a life of our love for one another. A love none could take away from us... Not even ourselves. And to me, that is truly glorious. An unbreakable bond between two. I only wish that everyone can find such a love one day. Even now, looking at the masses of seats our wedding has filled, I see that kind of love linking between people.

Those people... All of them out there in the front few rows... They gave so much for the two of us. Vinyl and I had made our plans for a wedding some weeks ago. And, when we told our friends, we were ordered to put our pens and papers down, and to stop planning our wedding.

"You two need to relax for once. For everything you've done for us, let us do something for you".

And with that, most of the wedding was out of our hands. They all took over. We merely sat back and advised on what sort of wedding we wanted; as well as the small details. But, our coordinator took control of everything, and our friends pulled everything together. Vinyl loved every minute of it... I admit I tried to sneak in my own hand to making the wedding. I'm certain they would have handled everything perfectly... But... I just can't sit idle when their's planning.

It's my nature.

Still, they insisted we sit it out and allow them handle any and every aspect of the wedding. I was very reluctant at first. It simply isn't done that way after all. But, looking at it all now, I must admit my fears were proved unfounded. Everything is perfect down to the flowers and lighting. She did just a wonderful job of putting it all together. And these flowers? Only Lyra could have picked my favorites... I mean, outside of the bride-to-be that is. Such goes without saying.

And now, here we are at last. Standing before the woman I love; the woman I would follow come flood or famine. This day I have dreamt of for so long... Down to absolute perfection.

Hands locked together.

Dozens of eyes were set upon the only point of true interest in the building. True enough that the church hall was decorated beautifully; lilies that seemed to change colors from blue to pink to purple as light caught against them at different angles lining the pews, glittering balls of light drifting almost hypnotically overhead. Even the guests of the ceremony were something to lay you eyes on with how beautifully they all dressed. And yet, not an eye wander too far from center stage; from the two women standing hand in hand at the alter.

Vinyl embodied both apprehension and awe where she stood. Her features -normally bombastic or relaxed given her mood at the time- were rigid, yet shaken as if she could crumble into a pile of Scratch at any moment. To the onlookers, she looked almost alien in her tailored tuxedo as well as the way she held up her perfect posture. She looked as though a simple word from the woman standing before her would send her toppling down like a sack of bricks. But, she stood there; permissibly sweaty palm in Octavia's and her other arm tucked behind her awkwardly.

The poor girl did not look comfortable.

Octavia on the other hand was the picture of serenity. That alone may have been why Vinyl was so visibly stunned. The woman she adored more than anything was before her without a doubt in her body; and it showed. Her entire form shined like an iridescent angel in her pure white gown and veil. Not a hair of hers was out of place, and neither was what she focused on. Vinyl. The love of her life. She looked at her with bright eyes and held her Vinyl's hand warmly. Perhaps with hopes that some of her confidence and comfort would flow into Vinyl.

Still, Vinyl looked too adorable for words in that moment to her.

The silence shared in the vast church was broken as an older woman stood from the front row. She made a small gesture to the two as she went to stand off to the side of the alter. With a clear of her voice and a quick fix of her spectacles, she addressed every soul in the church. "Ladies, gentlemen, children... Today, we gather here today for many reasons. For love, for friendship. For kindness, for remembrance. For hope, for fulfillment. But above all, we gathered here on this specific day for these two very special young women. Vinyl Scratch and Octavia--" a sharp inhale echoed through the church, "--Soon-to-be-Scratch."

"Oh, come on!" A young voice cried out above everyone else exhaling their hopeful breaths.

"These two wonderfully amazing women have touched the lives of everyone here. From Vinyl's cheerful and at times wild-abandon to aid whomever she may. Though, that has not stopped her from aiding those that did not want her assistance. That reason alone could fill anywhere with compassion. But, there is also Octavia. Someone I know personally through my daughter. That is why I can say with the utmost certainty she is one of the finest people I have ever known. I cannot speak of a greater union... At least not until the reception.

"But, enough flattery and banter. We're all gathered here for one greater purpose. The purpose of seeing these two women bound together in holy matrimony." A small surge went through everyone present, but no one moved to cheer or clap; there would be a time for that later.

"Now... Vinyl..." Octavia had to lightly squeeze her lover's hand to shock her to her senses so she would at least nod, "Do you take Octavia to be your lawfully wedded wife? To have and to hold? In sickness and health? Until death parts you both in this world?"

Vinyl wished now more then ever in her whole life that she had the shades to hide behind. Looking into Octavia's eyes now -those perfect orbs filled with such endless love for her- made her already strained legs feel like splintering under her. But, when she nearly buckled under herself, that reassuring squeeze graced around her palm again. "Back from the brink... You've got me again."

Every eye remained on the two of them and the ceremony centered around them. For most, it was a day long overdue. A day they all waited for just as long as Vinyl had to. And for some in the church, this was the reward for all their hard work. Slaving over invites, decorating a church, finding a church, finding decorations, organizing every minute detail, all so the brides wouldn't have to stress over a detail. So their perfect day would be flawless in execution. However, as relaxing as it was for Vinyl and Octavia, the ones behind the organization and coordination were far from relaxed.

In their hearts they wanted to listen to the ceremony and enjoy the fruits of their labor; as well as the joyful moment of the two people they worked so hard for. But, their heads were throbbing with stress. Looking back at it all, maybe they should have let Vinyl and Octavia pitch in a tiny bit... But hindsight's twenty-twenty.

In hindsight they should have only let Vinyl hire one coordinator.

In hindsight they should have sent out the invites earlier or at least through the mail.

In hindsight they should have pulled all of the bridal-party together sooner.

In hindsight... They probably should have started a month ago instead of three days ago.

But, in hindsight, it all started because of three little words...

"Are you sure you don't want us to be involved at all? This is our wedding after all..."

"Hey! We'll bring you in to look things over when we put something together, get your 'go-ahead' on whatever it is, and everything'll be perfect!"

"Well... I'm not so sure, Lyra... This isn't something normally done..."

"Octi, Octi, Octi... WE GOT THIS! Everything will be PERFECT! You just watch. We'll really knock your pants off. Which'll make the honeymoon easier, y'know?!"

"...You have this?"

"We got this."

"Vinyl and I will have nothing to worry about...?"

"All you'll have to worry about is focusing all your brain on just how amazing we're gonna blow this wedding up!"

"...Fine. If you'll be so insistent on it."

"We got this, Octavia. Don't you worry!"

Present day, Octavia and Vinyl truly had little to nothing stressing them out on the day of their wedding. The few days leading up to it had their worries, but were otherwise calm and relaxing for the two of them. All the work was left to trusted friends and loved ones. Friends that never would divulge what transpired those past three days. As long as both Vinyl and Octavia said "I do" and they all made it through the reception at the end, it would be the perfect wedding.

As far as Vinyl and Octavia were concerned anyway.

Chapter Two: We Gather Here Together...

Three weeks prier...

There's an old saying that goes "don't write checks you can't cash". There are different variations of it, but the sentiment remains the same through each version: you shouldn't make promises that you are unable to complete or make good on. It is a very simple concept, but still one people struggle with.

Lyra Heartstrings had no intention of letting her check in this matter bounce. She was a woman of her word, even if her word sometimes strayed towards the confusing and longwinded.

When she promised a panda for Fluttershy's preserve, she got one. She was subsequently tossed in jail for a few months, but that panda did make it to Fluttershy!

When she vowed to fill the local library with enough books to fill their every shelf, those shelves were stacked in a month. Granted they were stacked with unsold copies of self-published books she was able to get for pennies on the dollar, but they were still books.

So when she swore to Octavia that she would have this whole wedding on lockdown—that Octavia would have not a single thing to worry about—she intended to make good on it. Make great on it even! It was for Octavia after all; she deserved the absolute best. Vinyl too, if to a smaller extent.

"WE GOT THIS! Everything will be PERFECT! You just watch. We'll really knock your pants off." She had said with just gusto.

"We got this." She assured thrice over with not a drop of concern.

"All you'll have to worry about is focusing all your brain on just how amazing we're gonna blow this wedding up!" Was what she sold the whole idea off on to win Octavia over.

We. We. We. The collective we had it. Now Lyra just needed to let "we" know that she just wrote the check for them all without their consent. It would be just fine...

"Why couldn't you just hire a professional?" Having this meeting at a populated coffee shop was one of Lyra's better ideas. Redheart clearly wanted to belt out her frustration, but kept her tone a hissing hush so as not to disturb the other patrons.

"We are professionals!" Not professional party planners, or professional MCs, nor professional caterers, but still professionals in their own fields, "Who's gonna know them better than us? Some hired stuff-shirt'll probably suggests—like—cheese plates or... spam!"

"Pretty sure no caterer suggest spam..." Spitfire withdrew the mug of coffee she had been nursing from her lips to offer what little she could, "But, not the point, Lyra. Big events like this months to organize even for the best of them. Three weeks? Sure, a professional—"

"We are professionals!"

"—event organizer—save the semantics," The mug was with menace at Lyra, be it porcelain or hot bean-water, something was going to be thrown at her if she piped up again, "An event organizer could maybe throw it all together in that short a timespan, but just three shlubs?"

"Four shlubs actually. But, uh... The fourth doesn't know she's helping yet."

The two more sensible members at the table shared a look. Frustration and shaded indifference both sighed before looking back at the jolly, carefree woman who called them all together so early in the morning. "Lyra... Why?"

It was a simple question Spitfire asked, but it cut the conversation deep. Lyra moved to rest her arms on the table, letting them splay out and display herself entirely to her two companions. Amidst all the chatter, order bells panging in the shop, Lyra offered a sincere smirk. At an instant, both Redheart and Spitfire could feel that whatever she was thinking—whatever she was cooking up to tell them—was just going to make them feel like the heels for debating her over.

"Octi and Vi are two of the sweetest, honest, and most self-sacrificing people we know," Redheart felt a dull pang at her hip that she pressed a palm to, "Sure, it's gonna be hard, and it's gonna break our backs to see through... But they deserve a wedding that nobody but the people who love them the most can possibly put together."

Sure enough, they both felt crumby after hearing that. The nurse sunk into her seat as she just submitted to the fate she was dealt; having to juggle work at the hospital while trying to plan a whole wedding. Spitfire scratched the back of her neck anxiously before huffing a reluctant sigh. Her shades were plucked from her face so she could pinch the bridge of her nose, trying to center her thoughts. "A'right... Guilt trip us then," she bemoaned the outcome, but part of her was into the idea of showing some dear friends a good time, "I expect you at least have an idea of what we're going to be doing next? Please?"

Like the cat pleased to get her cream, Lyra's lips flipped from soft and sincere to smug and self-satisfied. "Worry not, worry not!" The harpist withdrew a few crumpled slips of paper from her jacket lapel before distributing two to the others, keeping two for herself, "I took the liberty—expecting all this boo-hoo talk of not wanting to help—"

"I feel it was pretty warranted..."

"—to write up jobs for each of us. If we each tackle one pillar of this job, we'll have this whole thing set in three weeks exactly," Lyra beamed with pride at her sheer cleverness.

"...The wedding is in exactly three weeks..." Redheart pointed out the obvious, not entirely sure why she bothered knowing exactly the laissez-faire attitude she'd get in response.

"Exactly! We'll have everything done the precise second they walk through the doors of the church!" It was exactly the response she expected from Lyra, yet she was still disappointed.

At the very least the venue for the ceremony was decided by the couple themselves along with the date, the venue for the reception, and the guest list. That much Lyra was unable to get her grubby little mitts on, even if that guest list was due for a little tweaking. But that wasn't for them to manage... That was to be left to the fourth of their party. Lyra did not need to look over her slip of paper as it was already committed to memory when she wrote it. The other two studied their part of the scheme, at least hoping it wasn't something completely inane.

Oddly enough, both Redheart and Spitfire's expressions turned more curious as they looked at their tasks. "Huh..." They both mumbled as one, only fueling Lyra's self-satisfaction.

"See? I wasn't blowing smoke, ladies! I know we've got this completely under control! I have every—" Lyra had to stop patting herself on the back when she saw both partners raise an objecting finger; it was nice when they praised her at once, but when they had issues at once it sent a chill down her poor spine.

Lyra had hoped that she could finish her speech before they both reached the bottoms of their work lists. While the first few jobs were tailored perfectly for their individual skill sets and crafted to keep their work-lives in balance with it, the last order on the sheets—even the two Lyra kept for herself—were not so agreeable.

"...I am not picking her up..." Spitfire outright refused.

"Can someone else do it?" Redheart was looking for a way out.

The team was crumbling once more, but Lyra was assured that things would come together. They had to. This was to be the greatest wedding ever. She steeled herself and pumped a fist to her chest to summon that sincerity that once won them both over. When she spoke, they would listen: "Yes you are, and no. Byeeeeee!"

Neither could retort as Lyra vaulted over the entirety of their table, kicking over a few—thankfully—empty mugs in the process before bolting out the door. Patrons across the whole shop looked on in baffled confusion as this mint-haired woman made a complete break for it. Once again, Lyra's plot to use the coffee shop as a smokescreen worked flawlessly. The two abandoned partners would look like utter clowns or worse if they tried to run her down in front of everyone here; so, they remained there, stewing away.

"Well... Guess we'd better get started..." Spitfire could think of nothing else to add to their situation as she plopped a few dollars on the table.

The rest of their work would be easy enough... But they were already cringing at the idea of dealing with their final jobs.

"Pick up Trixie from Manehattan (this will likely take a few days, so hop to it.)."

"Get the cake. (Be 100% sure it's the EXACT flavor they'll BOTH love.)."