The Author's autobiography: Project Almamac

by Cool writer

Rating: everyone
Tags: Human, Lyra, Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Bon-Bon, Other, Adventure, Crossover
Length: 1167

One time machine with a capable pilot is bad enough, 2 time machines is too many.

After a rather tiring adventure, Lyra and I return to Ponyville to be greeted with differences around town, and a newspaper with the headline: "4 teens win big on Canterlot-tery!" But immediately, I know something's off. The teens in the photo are covered in rift energy, wich is left behind from time travel.

My first piece of evidence that I can write my life better than the first story, THIS story!

Published 2015-07-11 05:40:01 UTC
Last updated 2015-07-11 05:40:01 UTC

1 Previously...

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It was midnight, and high above Equestria, and if you looked, you could see a light. Brighter than all the others. Because, it wasn't a star or a planet. It was a spaceship, which was I was on. And it was crashing.

"WHAT DO WE DO!?!" Lyra shouted over the commotion. Sparks shot from the controls of the massive ship.

"Well, you would be safe and sound in the TARDIS, if you had done as Ide asked!" I shouted back. "And I would fly this ship in an amazingly heroic way so that it didn't crash into anything. But as for us..." I tapped my chin a few times. "Hold that lever!" I pointed out a rather large lever. "I should give me enough time to finish reading the manual." Lyra slammed one hoof into her face and held the lever with another. "Atta' girl! Now, where was I? Ah! Yes! In the event of a crash landing, disengage the gyroscopic... thingy... and... oh! I love doing this!" I exclaimed when I realized what I get to do. The ship was entering orbit, so the room was getting warmer.

"Author, It's gettin kinda hot in here!" Lyra said, impossible to hide the concern in her voice.

"Alright alright! Keep your pants on!"

"Oh come on- that was one time!" Lyra protested my jab at her nightmare night costume. It was... a busyness pony? I don't know, I wasn't really paying attention, what with the few demons on the loose. I hit a few buttons and pulled back on what a human American may describe as, a miniature football goal.

"GERONIMO!!!!" I screamed as the ship's nose began to point up. Lyra just screamed.

Author's Note

this was supposed to be short, it's a sort of prologue!

Also not that much happened after that.

2 Safe and Sound

Bonbon sat in her living room. She had noticed how lonely it got when Lyra was gone with... him. She hated the Author. Shure, he's saved her life a few times, but her life had been... well... as normal as living with someone fascinated with fairy tales could be. But then she brought him home. And he brought his aliens with him. Then the box- don't get her started on the box! That bigger on the inside red box! Then off they went. Through time and space, battling the forces of evil... And she thought Nightmare Moon was bad. They're crazy, she thought. Both of them. But then, she heard it. The dreaded noise that box made.

Then a loud BOOM in the distance. Bonbon sighed and walked out to the garden. Sure enough, there it was. The TARDIS. Out of it's doors stepped a sooty Author and an unscathed Lyra. The Author coughed in between his laughs.

"So... that explosion was you two I'm guessing?" Bonbon asked. The Author frowned.

"I'm glad to see you too," The Author said sarcastically. "And I'll have you know that that explosion would be a whole lot closer if we hadn't been involved." Bonbon rolled her eyes. "Oh! That reminds me, I gotta go clean up before that ship changes the corse of history. You can chill for a while."

"Sure, that is exactally what I need right now." Lyra said, exhaustion in her voice. The Author waved, and stepped back into the tardis. The a loud noise filled the air, and the lamp on top of the box began to flash. With each flash, the box faded until the box was gone entirely. Then, the sound faded.

"I don't know about you," Lyra began. "But I'm starving."

Lya and Bonbon had gone out to a lovely diner for lunch.

"Man, I forgot how good this place is!" Lyra said. Bonbon tilted her head, confused.

"But, we ate here a few days ago," Bonbon said. She narrowed her eyes. "How long were you gone for this time?" She asked.

"... A week and a half." Lyra said, after doing some math in her head. Bonbon sighed.

"It seems that you're out longer and longer."

"But hey," Lyra said, reassuringly slugging Bonbon in the shoulder. "I always come back!"

"That's what I'm worried about," Bonbon said, sadly. "What if, one day, you and him... you know... and I just had to sit here, waiting for you, never knowing..."

"That'll never happen," Lyra said. She grimaced. "He'd probably trick me into staying in the TARDIS alone, and send it back here."

"I don't care you much you're paying, I'm not selling!!!" Mrs. Cake yelled from sugar cube corner across the street. Lyra turned to see what was going on.

"Oh come on!" A orange unicorn stallion said to her. "But it's 18 million bits!" Cue dinner plate eyes! Lyra's eyes became just that, dinner plates.

"Who has 18 million bits?!?" Lyra hissed to Bonbon.

"Day Break, the guy who won the lottery, remember? We read the paper together." Lyra remembered.

"Yeah, I remember that, but there was nothing in there about-"

"4 teens striking it rich in the Canter-lottery." the Author said, walking towards the outdoor table Lyra and Bonbon occupied. Bonbon face hoofed.

"Let me guess, aliens are involved?" Bonbon sighed.

"Well... the only aliens that mastered time travel are the time lords... so no! Aliens aren't involved."

"Time travel?" Bonbon and Lyra both asked. "Ok, how did you come to that conclusion?" Bonbon added.

"Watch, I'll show you." The Author said. He pointed to Lyra. "What was the headline of yesterday's paper?"

"Something about one of our adventures." Lyra said. Bonbon looked confused.

"That's not right, it was about the Canter-lottery." Bonbon protested.

"How is that possible?" Lyra asked.

"You're a time traveler now Lyra, the way you see the universe is changed, as a result, you remember the timeline as it originally happened, and Bonbon remembers it as it is now." The Author explained.

"So there are other time travelers out there?" Lyra confirmed. The Author nodded.

"And the good thing is, I know who it is without a shadow of a doubt: Daybreak!" the Author said excitedly. Lyra rolled her eyes.

"Just because he won the lottery and that didn't originally happen-" Lyra began.

"No, it's because he's covered in rift energy." The Author deadpanned. Bonbon opened her mouth to ask, but the Author interrupted with: "I'll explain later. For now, come on you two, we gotta catch him!" The Author said, racing off in the direction Daybreak went. Lyra looked at Bonbon with pleading eyes.

"No." Bonbon said. Lyra stared harder. Bonbon sighed. "Fine." She said. "But I swear, if I get into a futuristic shoot-out, I'm blaming you." The two stood up and galloped after the Author.