Starlight Glimmer's Awkward Dinner
Two Princess Spottings for the Price of One
When her ex-ally Double Diamond claimed spelunking through caves was anything but simple, Starlight Glimmer considered it hyperbole. Sure, his tautened face and erratic movements upon recalling his journey through one may have supported his claim, but Starlight scoffed as usual. She called it effortless. Tough or not, Starlight knew the second—or sixth most powerful magician had the stamina to traverse through such rugged terrain.
It didn't take an hour for Starlight to realize just how right Double Diamond was and then some. There was no doubt from the start her journey would be tough. It was how difficult it was which took her off guard. Now in Canterlot, Starlight's hind legs were bruised. An aching sensation still coursed throughout her body. Starlight even felt a tad lightheaded as she meandered along the road like a slithering snake; her eyes were drooping and bloodshot. Most ponies might see her in one of the worst situations with just those. But to her luck, another feeling overshadowed them.
Starlight's stomach roared like a ferocious lion, sharp twangs covering her belly. As she passed the shops selling all sorts of goodies or valuable antiques, she just wanted to dive in and chow down on every last scrap she could find. It didn't matter whether it was a hayburger or a pre-Nightmare Moon era sculpture.
It was amazing what three days with little food or no sunlight could do to a pony, at least according to Starlight.
Starlight peeked into the tattered up piece of brown leather she called a saddlebag, rummaging through its contents. The thirty bits she miraculously found residing in the cave were still with her; many of these were bent or lost their sheen. They went well with the ragged cloths, the makeshift cup she chiseled, and the chipped pyrite which she was certain was gold despite the claims of others. Starlight still raised her brow whenever she glanced at the cup, surprised she had such artistic talent. Its uneven shape and inability to stand upright were lost to her, however.
"You'd think Canterlot would have some sort of restaurant," Starlight grumbled to herself. Her stomach snarled once more in response. "But no, little Starlight Glimmer just happened to stumble on a place with almost no restaurants. If my ideals were adopted, then this wouldn't happen." Starlight spit on the ground; she then gnashed her teeth. "First I get driven out of town, then have to travel through a cave, and lastly end up at a place with no restaurants. Honestly, I think my cutie mark represents things getting worse more than above-average magic." She pressed her weight against the wall, red bricks prodding her coat. "Bah, maybe Our Town was right. I should've relinquished my magic with them."
Starlight's eyes widened. The dazzling array of lights above her felt as though somepony was spying on her. Sure, they only came from lampposts, but the tight, tingling sensation coursed through her muscles.
"Maybe I should get a move on." Starlight resumed trotting. "But come to think of it, how would I equalize ponies without my magic? It'd get me nowhere."
With a quick glance upward, Starlight noticed the shining lights still above her, their brightness rendering the night sky moot. It was fitting for Princess Celestia's home; the lampposts blotted out darkness and replaced it with just light. Luna's descent into Nightmare Moon long ago must have been due to those blasted lamps.
Another item to check off: Remove all lampposts.
Starlight then pondered whether she could get Luna to become equalized with her. Sure, having an alicorn princess on her side was just what she fantasized. Though getting Luna to join up would be impossible nowadays. She became so close to Celestia to where it was rare seeing the pair not together. Perhaps there was something else going on between the two; maybe how Celestia would reveal Luna's fondness of cheese if the latter became unruly again. Starlight childishly chuckled at the thought. Anything to make her laugh warmed her heart.
Though such warmth could last if she found a restaurant.
Then, a crisp aroma filled her nostrils. It was the familiar scent of baked goods coming out of the oven, the same smell Sugar Belle carried with her before Starlight whisked her cutie mark away. A terrible decision in hindsight; the bitter food never helped Our Town under her rule.
While the scent Starlight picked up couldn't hold a candle to what a talented Sugar Belle was known for, her mouth watered nonetheless. Starlight dashed toward the aroma's source. Twelve seconds later, the most beautiful and plain building—ugly enough to fit right in with Our Town—stood before her; Starlight grinned.
"Thank goodness!" Starlight shouted. She licked her lips, wasting no time barging through the front door.
Upon entering the establishment, Starlight heard a soft chime ring pollute the air. Shuddering in surprise, she then noticed a silver bell dangling from the ceiling. A wire connected it to the door's pivot. Such strange technology was beyond Starlight, magic and politics all she ever read about. But she had more vanilla concerns; like eating and reviving a cult.
"Welcome to Sunshine Cafe," a voice said.
Starlight leaped up as though lightning zapped her. When she landed on all fours, she swiveled her head toward the voice's owner. Standing there was a dark violet unicorn; a menu hovered before her face. Her wide grin drew Starlight's gaze toward it. Such a smile was akin to the ones Our Town's residents used to wear together.
Only much more real—uncanny the word Starlight was looking for. Nopony wore such grins with such sincerity. Either this mare was a changeling, or the three years she spent in the town felt longer than it did. Either way, Starlight wanted to request the mare cease smiling so—genuinely—though she knew better than to risk offending anypony.
"Sorry if I spooked you, ma'am," the mare continued.
Starlight rubbed the back of her neck; she blushed. "It's fine," she answered.
"Are you sure? Because it looks like your brow is ruffled up."
"No, things are completely fine. Nothing out of the ordinary." Starlight shook her head and feigned a smile. "Nothing. I couldn't be much happier."
The mare arched an eyebrow. "Are—are you sure you're okay?"
"Of course! May I take a seat?"
The mare's lips were sealed; a bemused expression adorned her face.
"Please?"
"Take the empty table off to the right, Miss—"
"Starlight Glimmer."
"Miss Starlight Glimmer." Rubbing her muzzle, the mare's brow then rose. "Why does that name sound so familiar?"
A chill coursed through Starlight's spine, lips pursed. "No reason."
The two locked gazes with each other, not blinking nor speaking. All Starlight's ears picked up were the murmurs of everypony else; their words were impossible to decipher. She waited for the mare to make the first move, almost as though it were some sort of staring contest. Ten seconds passed. Then twenty.
And yet, nothing still left their lips.
At the thirty second mark, the mare broke the silence, saying, "Well, go on over to one of the tables. You're welcome to take any open chair." She rubbed her eyes. "You mean you seriously didn't know that?"
Starlight rubbed the back of her neck. She blushed. "Well, I do now!"
Making her way to an empty table, Starlight scanned the perimeter of the room, throat tensed. There were a few ponies huddled around some of the tables, others eating by their lonesome. A few areas were vacant. Napkins and silverware were neatly arranged atop the cloth-covered tables. Strangest of all, however, was an empty pot atop each table. Not what she'd associate with decoration, though anypony who used the drapes she did shouldn't complain. But as she focused her gaze on one of the pots, Starlight couldn't help but feel a slight twang in her chest.
It looked like the pots she used to hoard back in Our Town. Perhaps this was what homesickness was like, if she could ever call Our Town home.
Or maybe it was the horror of spotting a cleaned pot. Pots were supposed to be dusty and grimy, not sparkling like gemstones.
Tossing the thought aside, Starlight sat at one of the empty chairs. She quickly noticed a menu bound in a thick, green cover upon glancing down. Either the cafe sold every dish known to ponykind, or the menu was hidden within a novel. Starlight forced a slight snicker; she then opened the menu. It was typical for a menu. Appetizers, entrees, and so on all were all categorized, but as she scanned its contents, the few mentions of Princess Cadance drew her attention. A blurb on the front page mentioned how she was a frequent customer back in the day and always stopped by while in Canterlot.
Seeing her—or any alicorn—was the last thing she wanted. Starlight then put the menu back down in a flash.
"That was anticlimactic," Starlight murmured. She placed a hoof on her muzzle; a yawn escaped from her mouth. "At least that bratty alicorn isn't—"
The bell chimed once more, Starlight peeking at the five ponies who trotted in. Three of them bounced around with bright grins adorning their faces, the fourth trotted in with a bemused expression, and the fifth trudged close behind with a deep scowl and drooping shoulders. Starlight yearned to slither up to the fifth pony and blather on about cutie marks and equality. Her brain, however, knew such a plan was akin to punching herself in the face.
Especially when she spotted the fourth pony, the only one of the group who wasn't a unicorn.
She was a light purple alicorn. The same alicorn Starlight butted heads with not too long ago.
"Sweet Celestia, did she know I was here?" Starlight whispered. She exhaled; her muscles loosened. "I just have to stay calm and not make a ruckus. Simple enough." Bringing the menu back to her face, Starlight studied the group's every move. There had to be something nefarious up their sleeves. The jubilant trio of the bunch was the sign; there was no doubt in her mind. At least until she realized friendship problems were likely on their agenda.
"I'm watching you, Twilight Sparkle. You wily little snake."
"Did someone say my name?" Twilight asked, her head swiveling around.
Starlight flinched. "Blast." She brought the menu closer to her, the page gently poking her muzzle. "Figures."
Before she could finish, a waitress donning a black tuxedo approached Starlight. Much to her horror, everything about this mare was lime green, Starlight wanting to ask if she needed a makeover. Though it was the long horn atop her head which drew Starlight's attention most of all. The mere sight of it caused the hairs of Starlight's coat to stand up. "Hello, Star—"
Starlight shushed the waiter, the tip of her hoof on her lips. "Just call me—um—Sunset Shimmer?"
"But that's not—"
"I know it's not. My real name is Flair de Mare."
The waitress shrugged. "Um, okay. So you're the—"
"Can I order, please?"
Nodding, the waitress flicked a pen out. Her eyes focused on the notepad. "You may—just be a little more polite, please."
"No promises." Starlight clasped her hooves together. A wide smirk formed on her visage. "I'll have two hayburgers and some water, please."
"Anything else?"
"That's all."
"Okay, Flair de Mare." The waitress rolled her eyes and, turning around in a huff, made her way back to the kitchen.
Starlight wiped her brow. Upon breathing a sigh of relief, she nudged her seat an inch toward where Twilight sat. Then another inch; not a screech echoed into her ears.
The five ponies were discussing a friendship problem with the glum one; her mane looked quite similar to Twilight's. Perhaps having a community adopt her manestyle wasn't as revolutionary as she thought; or perhaps it was all just a coincidence.
No, it couldn't be a coincidence. Starlight never believed in such hogwash to begin with.
Starlight focused on the mare—Moondancer seemed to be her name—like a cat eying something shiny. This Moondancer was just who Starlight needed to restart her goals, almost as if she trotted in just for her. Such an occurrence had to be a trap.
"Hey, do you four know who Starlight Glimmer is?" a white unicorn asked. "I heard somepony mention that name."
Twilight groaned. "I do. She's—interesting to say the least. Loud would be how I'd see her. She thinks making everypony equal is what's best for the world, but I don't buy her words."
"How come?" a yellow unicorn responded.
"For starters, she never relinquished her cutie mark like the others. Also, I always feel like I'm going up against these powerful beings that just want control of Equestria. Nightmare Moon, Sombra, and plenty of others. It's like a trend."
Starlight groaned softly. Of course Twilight would spout such claims. Despite not giving up her cutie mark like everypony else, she did plan on being the last one to do it. Perhaps explaining it to the village would have eased tensions.
Why didn't she mention that from the beginning? Starlight planted a face to her hoof. Maybe it was something to consider once she mastered a time travel spell. But such a spell wasn't possible for her yet.
"I'll get back at you one day," Starlight whispered to herself. "Maybe."
Starlight took a deep breath; muscles loosened as Twilight seemed occupied with her friends. Perhaps there wasn't anything to worry about after all. Then again, why should she worry? It wasn't as though anypony else knew of her past behavior. And she didn't have to worry about more princesses showing up as well with only four of them.
"Here you are—Flair de Mare," a new voice said. She sighed; the plate then clacked down on the table. "Look, I bet you're trying to run from somepony. Also, I know so much about you. Who you really are, that is."
"Whatever gave you that idea?" Starlight retaliated. Staring at mare in question, Starlight noticed the shining gold decorations; tall boots and a necklace. The horn which could double as a sword was the one common feature, though it was now her wings which Starlight couldn't avert her gaze from.
Of course there had to be another alicorn here.
"Do you know who I am?" the mare asked, her voice surprisingly soft. Starlight couldn't help but be taken aback. "I saw you emerge in Canterlot not too long ago, and when I heard you rambling on about food, I had a hunch it'd lead you here."
"How did you know?"
"Call it a mare's intuition, though this place was the closest from where you were."
A faint chuckle escaped Starlight's lips. At least the spying thing from before was grounded in reality. "I guess so. But you—Princess Cadance of all ponies—and Twilight Sparkle just had to be here, didn't you?" Starlight ground her teeth. "No luck for me. Again." She groaned.
"Well, today could be your lucky day." Cadance paused for a second. "But only if you agree to accept this offer."
Starlight perked up. She just knew her dreams of allying herself with an alicorn would come true; her face assumed a slight smirk. "Go on."
"It's not about me joining any cult of yours."
Less than a second later, Starlight's smirk vanished. She sulked. Of course somepony whose design was painfully cheerful wouldn't feel the need to give up her cutie mark and pursue a life of equality. "Okay then, what is it? Does it begin with a F?"
"Yes and no. You see, while many ponies would wish things could become equal in every way, such a state is difficult to obtain and even harder to maintain."
Starlight pouted. "You make it sound like it's impossible. But it's not true. Equality is easy as long as everypony strives for it."
"Tell me, in your little village, did everypony want to stay equal?"
"Yes," Starlight answered without hesitating.
"What about Night Glider and Party Favor?"
Starlight feigned a yawn. "What about Night Glider and Party Favor?"
"As you probably figured out, Party Favor wasn't fond of the less than stellar living conditions." Cadance placed a hoof on her chest. "And not too long ago, Night Glider wrote a letter."
Quivering as though electricity coursed through her veins, Starlight's jaw dropped. "She did? How did I miss—"
"That's not important right now. What's important is that she was concerned about the well-being of her sister."
"You lie." Starlight's brow furrowed. "Night Glider joined the town because she didn't get along with her sister."
As if she could predict the future, Cadance pulled out a furled up letter as proof, then tossed it toward Starlight. "Read this."
The letter fumbled in Starlight's hooves. After three seconds of juggling, she gripped onto it and placed it atop the table. "I'm not reading it."
Cadance raised an eyebrow. "Is it because you know I'm right? Or is it because you're afraid of the truth?"
Starlight clenched her teeth. She knew the second question was the answer, but Starlight couldn't admit to fearing something so meaningless as a stupid letter. "It's just because I don't want to."
"Shall I read it for you?"
"Of course not." Starlight grasped the letter; she brought it to her chest. Then, her irises shrank. "I can read it at my own leisure."
"When I stare into your eyes, I can read you like a book. You're afraid of the truth, but don't be scared."
Starlight shook her head. Even though Cadance was on the mark, she refused to accept it.
"I've been afraid of all sorts of things, some you might find hilarious," Cadance continued. "I've even been afraid of what the truth holds, as do many ponies. I don't think I need to remind you about the horrors of the Tirek incident."
Starlight cocked her head. "Who? Is he some sort of salespony who kept haggling you?"
Making eye contact with Starlight Glimmer, Cadance sighed. "Never mind. Anyway, we sometimes have to face our fears. Sometimes, we have to admit what we're doing or thinking is wrong and make changes for the better. We've all done that. I've been a little too—impolite at times. But I've made changes in how I act and see the world to become the pony now standing before you. I can still make quips if I need to, however."
"I don't believe that."
"Good for you." Clapping slowly, Cadance's brow sagged. "You've figured out not to take everything at face value. Honestly, it's a miracle you managed to form a whole cult."
"Really? I still don't believe you. And Our Town adored me before the beans were spilled. I was charismatic much like yourself, only better."
Cadance scrunched her muzzle. It was an odd mixture of cute and terrifying as far as Starlight was concerned. Cute in her being a pink princess; terrifying in her being a pink princess. "Even when the facts are reaching your ears? Or did you clog your ears with cotton before coming here? Honestly, you sound like another unicorn I know."
With her forelegs stretched out, Starlight nudged away from Cadance. Her eyes looked akin to dinner plates. "Okay. Geez, calm down."
"So would you say I'm telling the truth then?"
"Of course not. I know how to be rude." Starlight cleared her throat. "You're boring and your appearance makes me want to hurl into a river."
Cadance arched an eyebrow. "Couldn't force that enough. Nice try."
In a huff, Starlight pushed herself upright. "So that's how it is. Well, I'll never believe anything promoting friendship." Starlight pretended to hack up something. "I guess there's only one way this is ending.
"So you're leaving?"
"Soon. But not yet." Starlight swiped a hayburger, stuffing it in her mouth. At least the warm and soft flavors she tasted were pleasing. However, something as trivial as taste was beneath her. All Starlight cared about was getting something in her stomach, even if some slobber dripped on the floor. And the hayburger was completely devoured less than a minute later. "Okay, now I'm leaving. But first, how did you show up with my meal? How do you know all of this about me?"
"I have my connections. A few arrangements was all it took for me to surprise you." She paused, then ruffled her wings. "Also, Twilight Sparkle told me all about what happened in that town. While we can't charge you since nothing illegal was reported, Equestria's Royal Guard does have their eye on you."
Starlight bit her lip. "You see, I—I haven't done anything of that nature." There was the one time she attempted to zap Twilight, among other things, though how these managed to slip past everypony eluded her. Either way, she wasn't complaining. There were just the beads of sweat dripping down her brow she wished would vanish. "Now then, I'm leaving this rotten place. I don't want to press this any further."
"So you want to remain ignorant in the face of the truth? You want to ignore the warnings of a princess, only to cause a ton of trouble and inevitably face the consequences?"
"I'm going to win, you know. And no, I don't plan on doing anything nefarious."
"Fair enough. But remember, if you do cause a ruckus, Twilight Sparkle will probably be the one to stop you. I think your little experiment failed the moment you crossed paths with her." Cadance took a deep breath. "Embrace friendship and harmony, please. Know that we can all get along despite our differences. Know that everypony has a place in this world. You'll be happier as a result."
Groaning was all Starlight could muster. Of course she'd resort to those buzzwords. She swished her tail around a second later, regaining her composure. "You and your fellow princesses are too preachy when it comes to this stuff. You all sound like you're coming from a self-help booklet, so be quiet for once." She swiveled around and trotted away. Starlight's piercing gaze never averted where Cadance was. It was as though she wanted to make sure she'd stay put.
Cadance looked on with a bemused expression. Not a word left her mouth. Starlight assumed she was either giving up at last or disturbed by the mess she made earlier, the crumbs spoiling the gleaming floor. It was more likely the former. Nevertheless, it brought a smile to her face to flee such a pest.
Upon reaching the outside world, Starlight sniffed the air. It was surprisingly clean. Cleaner than the perfection Our Town was under her rule.
But one couldn't top perfection. Yet here was Canterlot's air doing so. Starlight couldn't help but wonder whether Cadance had a point in her blathering, how she should try to embrace friendship and harmony. Theoretically, it did make sense on how it'd make her happier, but at the same time she refused to believe it. Starlight Glimmer couldn't be wrong, right?
"Maybe Cadance has a point after all," she muttered.
Then, soft murmurs reached her ears. Starlight shuffled toward the commotion's source, spotting Twilight Sparkle and Moondancer. The pair both wore glum expressions, Starlight certain she heard them discussing about how to repair their friendship, though it likely wasn't going well based on their sulking postures.
"Friendship?" Starlight rolled her eyes. She stuck her tongue out for a second. "Please, all friendship does is cause turmoil. Cadance doesn't know what she's talking about. Even if they make amends, the fact they even split apart once is reason enough that I'm right. What was I thinking when I thought of agreeing with Cadance?" Starlight squinted at Twilight; a deep scowl was painted on the former's visage. "And you, Princess Twilight Sparkle." She groaned. "I'm not forgetting you."
And with a flick of her tail, Starlight trotted away from Sunshine Cafe. All her mind could think of were plans for the future.
Though her curiosity about friendship still remained; latched onto her like a parasite.
