The Battle of Colissiaby equestriaobviouslyChaptersThe First SightingThe FillynappingThe SecretEquestrian Laws: A hilarious bonus chapter written by Pinkie to keep herself in checkThe First Sighting We set off for changelings territory at noon the next day. We took one of my specialized carriages, the one that has 13 bedrooms with connecting bathrooms. Each bedroom was personalized for a specific pony. It was my idea, which used my magic to evaluate each pony and design the room to their liking. We stayed in the carriage for three days before we hit the Dark Forest, and then we had to walk. We really should have put Pinkimena Pie on a leash, for she was being severely strange. We had stopped on a cliff for a lunch break, and Pinkimena had been pacing all the way to the edge and back. However, she soon stopped paying attention and walked off the edge of a cliff. The strangest thing was that gravity seemed to have no effect on her. She walked 10 miles off before skipping back. I questioned her on this, but she just said it's normal for her. I really must meet her parents. Maybe they can explain her. She also can survive deadly poison, as well as surviving a ten foot drop out of a tree, eating hallucinatory mushrooms, and getting a fatal wound. That is definitely not normal. Later that night, I saw somepony darting through a forest. Who, I did not know. I ran after them, and caught the end of their cloak. A young girl turned to face me. She had sparkles in her hair and just so happened to be an alicorn. She stared at me, and I saw tears forming in her eyes. She ran off into the deep caverns of the forest. "Daughter?" I was stunned. I ran back to our camp and went back to bed. If my daughter was here, so was her father, and that meant we were all doomed. When I woke up in the morning, I forced our group towards the exit of the forest. However, we were stopped in our tracks by a brown stallion with an hourglass necklace. Oh Faust, we were all doomed. Twilight shoved her way to the front of the group. " Who are you? What do you want with us. Give us one reason we shouldn't arrest you for blocking our path!" Twilight continued to harass him with questions, which he didn't answer. She started to pull at him with her magic. At that point, I intervened. " Twilight, leave the poor stallion alone. Hello, sweetie." Everypony's mouths dropped open. " Guys, this is my husband, Doctor Whooves," I said through gritted teeth. "Hello. Don't have time to talk. Got to go." He bumbled idiotically. He tried to run, but I grabbed his cloak. He looked at me, surprised that I dare stop him. I gave him an angry scowl, before yelling in his face. " How about you stay away from this time period. Forever!" I yelled at him. " And leave Starlight. She is mine." And with that, I let him go. The Fillynapping“Twilight, will ya’ please come out?” Applejack paced around the room, stopping to knock on Twilight’s bedroom door. She had been in there for at least 21 days, and she would most likely stay even more if she hadn't agreed to journey into changeling territory. She was probably a mess by now. All she had been doing was eating, drinking, sleeping, crying, and dry heaving. Poor mare. “No,” Twilight responded, in a fury of hysterical sobs. “I can’t believe it. I feel so bad for you three. How do you guys handle it? It’s so horrible!” The sound of Twilight retching echoed into the halls. It was a normal sound nowadays. However, everypony still cringed. That much heaving was bad for Twilight's health. Rainbow Dash, Rarity, and Applejack all hung their heads low, tears in their eyes. “We know, Twi, but it’s been 3 weeks. Life won’t get better by livin’ in misery. We really should go rescue them.”The rest of the girls nodded in agreement. It had been 3 weeks since the first incidents. The changelings had taken Sweetie Belle, Scootaloo, and Apple Bloom in the night. We knew it was changelings because Rarity was awaken by the sound of struggles in the middle of the night, and ran to Sweetie Belle’s room. However, she got there too late. All she saw was a black pair of legs, riddled with holes and covered by a dark purple cloak. Rarity had collapsed into hysterics, sobbing and dry heaving the whole night. Applejack took it a whole lot worse, though. As soon as she found a bluish-grey changeling hair on Apple Bloom’s bed, she started bucking everything she could find. They’re still rebuilding half the barn. Of course, when Scootaloo was taken, Rainbow Dash demanded action. She demanded we declare war. Of course, Twilight said no. Fluttershy, well…she felt bad, but she would never demand violence, at least usually. But she has been protecting her newly adopted sister, Dinky Doo. She really must be worried about her if she is demanding violence. We were to set out for changeling territory tomorrow afternoon. I said my goodbyes to the girls, promising to come back tomorrow. Then I set off for home, the night trailing behind me. The Secret I rummaged through my dresser drawers until I found it. The picture was of me, a brown stallion, and a beautiful young girl of about 4 years old, smiling at the camera. Why did she have to endure this? Why? It was bad enough anyways, with the father always being gone. But her mother was me, and I hadn’t seen her for over 10 decades. She was lucky that she was only 18 right now. I couldn’t have lived if she were dead after all these years. “Oh my dearest daughter, I shall find you. I promise,” I whispered to the pictures. It was then that I noticed Celestia in the doorway. “Luna, you had a daughter? Who with?” Celestia bombarded me with questions about my past. I felt rather uncomfortable, and kept leaving her questions unanswered. Sheesh, can't I ever have privacy? She kept asking, until I finally exploded. “I would rather not speak about it! It is my personal business! Get out!” I knew I had hurt Celestia, for she looked crestfallen, but she had no right to dig into the past. What happened was over. I was alone again, and it was my fault. Why did I let myself become corrupted? After Celestia left, I went over the group of ponies going with us. It had originally just been me, Twilight, Fluttershy, the pink one, the fashionista, the cowgirl, and Rainbow Dash. However, the group ended up with Sunset Shimmer, Adagio Dazzle, Trixie the Not-So-Great, Dischord, Shining Armor, and Flash Century joining us. How did we get into this mess? Ugg… I give up. With that, I raised the moon and started off Night Court. Equestrian Laws: A hilarious bonus chapter written by Pinkie to keep herself in check1.You may not wrestle bears anywhere in Equestria Just because you don't want to work does not mean you can maim yourself to get out of it No licking horns You may not flick your boogers into the wind No wearing masks in public You may not impersonate Celestia or Luna, only Twilight You may not sell foam peanuts to ponies who think they are real peanuts You may not lie that your peanuts are real You may not drive a carriage blindfolded You may not wear fake moustaches in church You may not skateboard in a public building You are not allowed to push a moose out of a moving airplane You cannot wake up a sleeping bear to take pictures with it You may not tie Gummy to the roof of a carriage You may not dress as a clown in a business office You may not parade around Canterlot with a bow and arrows You cannot hunt camels in the desert You cannot steal soap and eat it You are not allowed to ride Twilight up any set of stairs You are not allowed to buy spray paint until you are 180 You cannot sneak up on Celestia and Luna at random times in the castle Especially not at night You cannot throw Frisbee's at ponies heads without fair warning You cannot ride a bicycle in a swimming pool You may not mutilate rocks You may not throw missiles at carriages You may not fire catapults at buildings You may not let your llama eat Twilight and Fluttershy's gardens You may not challenge a police officer You may not let your pickles bounce You may not strap rockets to your bicycle You may not walk backwards down stairs You may not cross the street while walking on your hands You may not cover Celestia and Luna in Silly String It is illegal to sell your half-eaten cupcakes You may not tie an elephant to a parking meter You may not sing at church while in a swimsuit You may not live on a boat for more than 30 days You may not yell at dead bodies You may not play pinball after 2 A.M. You may not fish on a camel's back You may not fish from a giraffe's back You may not charge one armed piano players You may not eat fire hydrants You may not catch fish with your bare hooves Musical car horns are banned You may not drive your carriage through a parade You may not sing the alphabet song at night if you are not inside and in your bedroom and all alone with your window closed
The First Sighting We set off for changelings territory at noon the next day. We took one of my specialized carriages, the one that has 13 bedrooms with connecting bathrooms. Each bedroom was personalized for a specific pony. It was my idea, which used my magic to evaluate each pony and design the room to their liking. We stayed in the carriage for three days before we hit the Dark Forest, and then we had to walk. We really should have put Pinkimena Pie on a leash, for she was being severely strange. We had stopped on a cliff for a lunch break, and Pinkimena had been pacing all the way to the edge and back. However, she soon stopped paying attention and walked off the edge of a cliff. The strangest thing was that gravity seemed to have no effect on her. She walked 10 miles off before skipping back. I questioned her on this, but she just said it's normal for her. I really must meet her parents. Maybe they can explain her. She also can survive deadly poison, as well as surviving a ten foot drop out of a tree, eating hallucinatory mushrooms, and getting a fatal wound. That is definitely not normal. Later that night, I saw somepony darting through a forest. Who, I did not know. I ran after them, and caught the end of their cloak. A young girl turned to face me. She had sparkles in her hair and just so happened to be an alicorn. She stared at me, and I saw tears forming in her eyes. She ran off into the deep caverns of the forest. "Daughter?" I was stunned. I ran back to our camp and went back to bed. If my daughter was here, so was her father, and that meant we were all doomed. When I woke up in the morning, I forced our group towards the exit of the forest. However, we were stopped in our tracks by a brown stallion with an hourglass necklace. Oh Faust, we were all doomed. Twilight shoved her way to the front of the group. " Who are you? What do you want with us. Give us one reason we shouldn't arrest you for blocking our path!" Twilight continued to harass him with questions, which he didn't answer. She started to pull at him with her magic. At that point, I intervened. " Twilight, leave the poor stallion alone. Hello, sweetie." Everypony's mouths dropped open. " Guys, this is my husband, Doctor Whooves," I said through gritted teeth. "Hello. Don't have time to talk. Got to go." He bumbled idiotically. He tried to run, but I grabbed his cloak. He looked at me, surprised that I dare stop him. I gave him an angry scowl, before yelling in his face. " How about you stay away from this time period. Forever!" I yelled at him. " And leave Starlight. She is mine." And with that, I let him go.
The Fillynapping“Twilight, will ya’ please come out?” Applejack paced around the room, stopping to knock on Twilight’s bedroom door. She had been in there for at least 21 days, and she would most likely stay even more if she hadn't agreed to journey into changeling territory. She was probably a mess by now. All she had been doing was eating, drinking, sleeping, crying, and dry heaving. Poor mare. “No,” Twilight responded, in a fury of hysterical sobs. “I can’t believe it. I feel so bad for you three. How do you guys handle it? It’s so horrible!” The sound of Twilight retching echoed into the halls. It was a normal sound nowadays. However, everypony still cringed. That much heaving was bad for Twilight's health. Rainbow Dash, Rarity, and Applejack all hung their heads low, tears in their eyes. “We know, Twi, but it’s been 3 weeks. Life won’t get better by livin’ in misery. We really should go rescue them.”The rest of the girls nodded in agreement. It had been 3 weeks since the first incidents. The changelings had taken Sweetie Belle, Scootaloo, and Apple Bloom in the night. We knew it was changelings because Rarity was awaken by the sound of struggles in the middle of the night, and ran to Sweetie Belle’s room. However, she got there too late. All she saw was a black pair of legs, riddled with holes and covered by a dark purple cloak. Rarity had collapsed into hysterics, sobbing and dry heaving the whole night. Applejack took it a whole lot worse, though. As soon as she found a bluish-grey changeling hair on Apple Bloom’s bed, she started bucking everything she could find. They’re still rebuilding half the barn. Of course, when Scootaloo was taken, Rainbow Dash demanded action. She demanded we declare war. Of course, Twilight said no. Fluttershy, well…she felt bad, but she would never demand violence, at least usually. But she has been protecting her newly adopted sister, Dinky Doo. She really must be worried about her if she is demanding violence. We were to set out for changeling territory tomorrow afternoon. I said my goodbyes to the girls, promising to come back tomorrow. Then I set off for home, the night trailing behind me.
The Secret I rummaged through my dresser drawers until I found it. The picture was of me, a brown stallion, and a beautiful young girl of about 4 years old, smiling at the camera. Why did she have to endure this? Why? It was bad enough anyways, with the father always being gone. But her mother was me, and I hadn’t seen her for over 10 decades. She was lucky that she was only 18 right now. I couldn’t have lived if she were dead after all these years. “Oh my dearest daughter, I shall find you. I promise,” I whispered to the pictures. It was then that I noticed Celestia in the doorway. “Luna, you had a daughter? Who with?” Celestia bombarded me with questions about my past. I felt rather uncomfortable, and kept leaving her questions unanswered. Sheesh, can't I ever have privacy? She kept asking, until I finally exploded. “I would rather not speak about it! It is my personal business! Get out!” I knew I had hurt Celestia, for she looked crestfallen, but she had no right to dig into the past. What happened was over. I was alone again, and it was my fault. Why did I let myself become corrupted? After Celestia left, I went over the group of ponies going with us. It had originally just been me, Twilight, Fluttershy, the pink one, the fashionista, the cowgirl, and Rainbow Dash. However, the group ended up with Sunset Shimmer, Adagio Dazzle, Trixie the Not-So-Great, Dischord, Shining Armor, and Flash Century joining us. How did we get into this mess? Ugg… I give up. With that, I raised the moon and started off Night Court.
Equestrian Laws: A hilarious bonus chapter written by Pinkie to keep herself in check1.You may not wrestle bears anywhere in Equestria Just because you don't want to work does not mean you can maim yourself to get out of it No licking horns You may not flick your boogers into the wind No wearing masks in public You may not impersonate Celestia or Luna, only Twilight You may not sell foam peanuts to ponies who think they are real peanuts You may not lie that your peanuts are real You may not drive a carriage blindfolded You may not wear fake moustaches in church You may not skateboard in a public building You are not allowed to push a moose out of a moving airplane You cannot wake up a sleeping bear to take pictures with it You may not tie Gummy to the roof of a carriage You may not dress as a clown in a business office You may not parade around Canterlot with a bow and arrows You cannot hunt camels in the desert You cannot steal soap and eat it You are not allowed to ride Twilight up any set of stairs You are not allowed to buy spray paint until you are 180 You cannot sneak up on Celestia and Luna at random times in the castle Especially not at night You cannot throw Frisbee's at ponies heads without fair warning You cannot ride a bicycle in a swimming pool You may not mutilate rocks You may not throw missiles at carriages You may not fire catapults at buildings You may not let your llama eat Twilight and Fluttershy's gardens You may not challenge a police officer You may not let your pickles bounce You may not strap rockets to your bicycle You may not walk backwards down stairs You may not cross the street while walking on your hands You may not cover Celestia and Luna in Silly String It is illegal to sell your half-eaten cupcakes You may not tie an elephant to a parking meter You may not sing at church while in a swimsuit You may not live on a boat for more than 30 days You may not yell at dead bodies You may not play pinball after 2 A.M. You may not fish on a camel's back You may not fish from a giraffe's back You may not charge one armed piano players You may not eat fire hydrants You may not catch fish with your bare hooves Musical car horns are banned You may not drive your carriage through a parade You may not sing the alphabet song at night if you are not inside and in your bedroom and all alone with your window closed
