Twistbuscus Adventures

   It was a particularly stormy day. Two ponies sheltered themselves from the storm in one of their houses. The two ponies were both pegasi, but while one was an emerald green with a bedhead blue mane, the other was dark grey, with crimson eyes and a long, flowing, also crimson mane. Despite ponies usually walking around nude, these two both wore shirts. The green one wore a shirt that was colored about three shades lighter than his fur and had "TWISTBUSCUS" on the front in small but visible, blocky grey letters, while the grey pony wore a purplish-blue shirt that read "SQUEEBUSCUS" in the same grey letters.

   "Twistbuscus" was leaning against the arm of the sofa the two were sitting on, while "Squeebuscus" was reading a book. Twistbuscus let out a loud groan, turning over to Squeebuscus. "I'm bored!" he complained, to which Squeebuscus shushed him. Ignoring it, Twistbuscus went on. "Let's do something, Squeebuscus! What are you doing-" he glanced at the book in Squeebuscus's hooves, "-reading?"

   Squeebuscus sighed, giving Twistbuscus an annoyed, exasperated look out of the corner of his eye. "Twister, my name is Squall. Do you have to call me Squeebuscus?"

   Twister gawked at Squall like he had three heads. "Of course! What's wrong with Squeebuscus?!"

   Squall clenched the book he was holding. "Squall."

   "Yeah! Squeebuscus!"

   Squall ground his teeth together. "Squall! Squall Lionfeather!"

   Twister facehoofed. "Dude, you can't force me to call you by your full name! My brain goes too fast for that! HEY what's this?" Twister snatched a random brochure that just so happened to be lying there. Rather than read it like a normal person, he slapped it over his muzzle and just stared at nothing while the pages covered his eyes. He let out a loud gasp, then ripped the pamphlet from his face and shoved it into Squall's. "DUDE! D Island coupons—two nights for thirty bits!"

   Squall cocked his eyebrow. "D Island?"

   "Dude, that's like barely fifteen bits a night!"

   "Actually, it's exactly fifteen bits a night," Squall corrected.

   "AKSHULY IZ EGSALY FIVEEN BIS A NITE," Twister mocked. "It sounds fun."

   Squall glared daggers at Twister. "I am not going on an island vacation with you."

   Ignoring him, Twister turned to a doorway sitting on the other side of the room. "MATTEO!" he barked, "WE'RE GOING TO D ISLAND!"

   Squall tried to stop him. "Wait! WaitwaitWAIT—"

   "ORDER US SOME TICKETS!"

   "Guhhh." Squall facehoofed.

*Two hours later*

   "Yeah! WE MADE IT!" Twister let out a cry of victory as he bounced up and down on top of the sandy shore, as if the carriage flying them hadn't crashed and burned, with him and Squall being the only survivors. "We are gonna have so much fun!"

   "Yeah," Squall groaned, voice dripping with sarcasm. "Great."

   Twister spun around to see a half-dead mare lying on the ground next to him, skin half-decayed and yellow bone showing through. Immediately, something stirred in his crotch, and he knew he wanted this lady. Putting on a suave persona, he leaned himself against a tree. "Wassup, girl?" he flirted. "What'chu doin'? Takin a nap? Smooth." Twister then pulled out a small slip of paper reading 1-800-CALL-ME-MAYBE on it. "Here's my numba." Twister then let out a victory laugh, even though the mare, who was clearly a zombie, made no move to take his phone number. She had, however, gotten up off the ground and was slowly shuffling towards him.

   "Do you just walk around with your phone number pre-written on pieces of paper?" Squall snarked.

   "Eeeeeeyep."

   Squall rolled his eyes. "'Course you do."

   Meanwhile, the zombie had gotten within two feet of Twister.

   "Oh, hello!" At first, Twister was intrigued, but when he caught a whiff of the zombie's breath, he sprang back about nine feet. "WOAH! Somepony doesn't use mouthwash!" He let out three hacking, gagging coughs. "No offense!" Twister then swooned. "You're hot."

   Squall rolled his eyes, then caught sight of a welcoming sign off to the right, and upon reading it, gave an alarmed start. "Wait, Twister. This poster says Dead Island."

   "Soooo?"

   "This is Dead Island!"

   Twister paused. "Like the game where there's... zombies?"

   "Yeah!"

   Twister's breath quickened. "And everyone... dies?"

   "Yes!"

   "No wonder it was thirty bits!"

   Squall facehoofed. "RUUUUUUUUUUUN!" he screamed.

   Twister pointed at the zombie he'd been flirting with. "But hothothothotHOThothot!" he protested. Through the magic of friendship, Squall knew just what he was saying.

   "No hothothothot! Run!"

   "Okay, okay. You don't gotta yell. Jeez!" Twister then turned to flee—right as the zombie took a chunk of flesh out of his shoulder. "OOOOWWWWW!" Twister fell to the ground with the zombie on top of him.

   Squall facehoofed once more. "Now look what you've done," he sighed.

   Twister desperately held the zombie's face away from him. "THAT IS A NO-NOOOO!" Panicked, he turned to look at Squall. "Neosporin!" He pleaded. "Neosporin!"

   "I said run. Here-" Squall pulled a small disinfectant cream out of a random shirt pocket. "-take your Neospori—"

   "NO!" Twister screeched, "GET THE ZOMBIE FIRST!"

   "Yeahyeahyeahyeahyeah." Squall hurriedly decapitated the creature... by punching it in the face.

   Twister gasped as the weight fell from his chest. "Oh, jeez!" He pushed himself into a sitting position. "Aw, man!" A spurt of blood shot from the zombie bite, and he covered the wound with a hoof. "Thank you," he breathed up at Squall, finding his feet once more. "Freakin' zombies," he chuckled, "am I right?"

   Squall nodded. "Yeah," he agreed. "You can't live with 'em, and they can't live—"-he smirked-"because they're dead."

   And for the first time in a long while, Squall burst out laughing, along with Twister. He didn't know why he thought such a horrible pun was so funny, but either way, he let out huge guffaws of laughter, sitting there with Twister and finally enjoying himself—until a zombified Twister pounced on top of him and bit open his neck. "Oh, no! Ah! AHH, no! No!" With his strength diminishing, Squall crumpled to the floor, pinned beneath Twister.

   Twister slapped him across the face. "Squeebuscus!" he roared through a mouthful of flesh and fur.

   Squall wouldn't go out like this. No, he wouldn't. He would find a way. With his strength dissipating and his life about to end, Squall gathered up all the power he could and let out one final cry.

   "My name is Squall!" he then screamed in agony as Twister buried his teeth into his neck.

~END