Princess Twilight Sparkle was something unique in the castle: available. Well, to be fair, Celestia and Luna were also single, but who’d want to get with cougars like them? Not Flash Sentry.
Still, the problem of being noticed by Twilight had kept Flash muddled for some time now. She ate the flowers he’d brought her. His attempts at flirting were usually thwarted by some sort of important friendship business. When he’d tried to buy her books, she’d already had them all.
Nearing his wit’s end, an idea had come to Flash that was perfect. He would invite Twilight out sailing. His small sailboat had cost a fortune, but it was clean and well maintained and Flash was a top sailor from his days at the Royal Guard academy. Once he had her alone, there would be nothing to distract her from him. This was foolproof.
At least it would be if he could actually find enough of her time to drop the invitation. When he'd first walked into her lab in the castle tower, there was a glimmering portal in the corner and Twilight was having tea with some strange creature wearing a pantsuit who bore a passing resemblance to Princess Celestia. The second time he’d tried, it was another such creature and they were having an argument about peanut butter crackers.
And if it wasn’t that, she was working on nuclear fusion, or flesh-eating bacteria cultivation, or necromancy, based on the titles of the book fort she’d assembled.
Yet Flash’s persistence was eventually rewarded. One day, he casually asked, “Would you like to go sailing with me this weekend?” and Twilight wasn’t too busy to respond.
She said no.
“Sorry, but I have to solve the problem of the scylla that’s been reported in the lake,” Twilight said, not looking up from her notes. “It’s been terrorizing a lot of ponies and the weekend is peak boating time.”
“I can help!” Flash immediately volunteered. “I have a boat at the lake.”
Twilight paused and looked up. “Really?”
“Sure.” Barely able to contain his excitement, Flash continued as smoothly as he was able. “Whatever I can do. Now, I’ll have to warn you that it’s a very, ah, cozy and personal boat, only big enough for about two ponies.”
Twilight, however, was already bounding around the laboratory collecting supplies. “That’s perfect! This is so great! I’ve been wanting to get out on the lake for so long now! Thanks a lot, Flash!” She grabbed a bag filled with equipment. “Can we go now?”
Flash didn’t get off guard duty for a few more hours, but…well, he was supposed to make sure the princesses were safe and if she was going to the lake…
The two of them made good time on the way to the marina. Twilight was a little clumsy in the air, but Flash wasn’t about to leave her side.
“I’ve been studying the scylla for a while now,” Twilight said as they flew. “I wonder what possible evolutionary advantage it could have had for its signature traits to develop: the six heads with sharp teeth and the tail that can create whirlpools. Some ponies think the whirlpool is caused by an entirely separate creature, or maybe a symbiote. I’m so happy to have the opportunity to study it up close. Thanks again for doing this.”
Flash smiled. “My pleasure.”
He showed her to his sailboat. It was fairly modest compared to others at the piers, but Twilight didn’t seem to care about the size. She beamed. “This is perfect.”
Beaming in happy anticipation, Flash untied the ropes and unfurled the sail. The boat moved smartly, the breezes carrying it away from shore and out into the lake.
He was even more happy to discover the chill-charm cooler still contained iced drinks. “Would you like some refreshments?”
“Maybe later,” said Twilight. She spread her wings and went to perch up on top the mast with a pair of binoculars. The rocking of the boat and her own innate awkwardness made it difficult to stay up there, but she persevered.
Flash wished he could join her, but somepony had to work the rudder. Twilight called out, “I see a whirlpool! We’re headed right for it!”
“What?!” Flash started to haul the rudder over, but Twilight called, “No, keep going that way!”
Confused, but not wanting to do anything to spoil the date, he complied. Twilight landed back on the deck beside him, showing a huge grin. “I’m so excited right now!”
As they got closer to the whirlpool, six pairs of eyes broke the surface of the water. Twilight pointed them out. “There they are! Their mouths are probably just below the surface. They’re reported to be big enough to eat a pony in one bite.”
“Uh, really?”
“I’ll need to get some measurements.” Twilight rummaged around in her bag and pulled out a tape measure.
Her timing was perfect as six snarling mouths burst from the lake, rising on long necks high above the boat.
Flash’s knees went rubbery and his eyes bugged out.
“Look at it!” Twilight said. “It’s so big!” She pulled out a camera and took a picture. “Sail a little closer to the whirlpool while I get the data.”
With a shaking hoof, Flash groped for the rudder, unwilling to take his eyes off the scylla. Twilight’s horn lit up and she snagged one of the heads with magic, pulling it down towards the boat. Flash dropped flat on his back, scrambling across the deck to get away as she dragged it in, the teeth close enough to drip saliva on the boat.
“Wow, I can imagine this thing would do a number on anypony unlucky enough to get caught,” mused Twilight as she measured the teeth and the head while the scylla struggled against her powerful grip.
Twilight let it go and glanced towards the front of the boat. “Now for the last test.” Flash felt the boat start to tilt and realized it must be going over the edge of the whirlpool. Panicked, he leaped off the deck and got airborne.
The sailboat didn’t stand a chance. Flash and Twilight hovered in the air as the boat spiraled downwards, smashing to pieces against the rushing water.
“Look at that!” Twilight observed, taking another picture. “This thing is just as dangerous as everypony reported, but now I’ve got the solid data to prove it! This has been an excellent scientific expedition and I can’t thank you enough for agreeing to provide the boat!”
“Uh…yeah,” said Flash, still staring forlornly at where his boat had vanished.
“I had no idea you were so involved with science,” said Twilight. She smiled at him. “This has been one of the best experiments ever. You’re so helpful. We could do so many more experiments together. I…I think I love you.”
Flash gulped. “Um, I think you’re a really good friend.”
