No Happy Returns.

by TheDawsonator1

Rating: teen
Tags: Romance, Princess Celestia, Human, Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark, Alternate Universe
Length: 2306

Anonymous, a exiled human has been cleared of his charges and Princess Celestia asks him back to Equestria. But will he follow?

Warning: Slight Dark and slight one-sided Celestia x Human. There will be no happy endings.

Anonymous has been charged with the death of Princess Luna. Twenty-five years later, on a stormy night his name is cleared and Princess Celestia tracks him down to convince him to come back with her.

But Anon has not been some innocent ponies, will he come back with blood on his hands or will he stay in the Tartarus-hole abomination he has been in for the last Twenty-Five years?

Published 2015-07-21 20:50:01 UTC
Last updated 2015-07-21 20:50:01 UTC

Twenty-five years do not bring happy endings.

There used to be a human, back in the town of Ponyville. A happy young teenage human that was just so friendly around town. That was twenty-five years ago but still, his presence was remembered but not in a good way.

Twenty-Five years ago, Anonymous was charged for the death of Princess Luna, many suggested death for him, but Celestia was merciful and gave him exile and if he should return then death shall take him.

There was one thing nobody knew, Anonymous didn’t kill Princess Luna, somepony else did and they got away with it.

Someplace else, there is Neutral ground, no kingdom owned it, but many exiled or plain criminals went. It was ground grown on blood of sins, revenge, avenge and down right for money and respect. This was Anon’s home, a home with no house but it was somewhere Anon stayed for the past 25 years.

Now at the age 43, Anon has gone past a few primes but has stayed at relative strength needed to survive. It was kill and enjoy the blood or die by somepony’s hoof who will most certainly enjoy it.

It was raining, some see those as omens, Anon was not such creature, in his new life he called that sound cover, perfect to murder a person without too much of a silent trip. There was no such murder today, Anon was resting for it was night time and even a hunter needs his rest.

Currently in a cave, Anon had made sure not to stick to any pattern or anything predictable, you never know who might be on your trail. Caution is a wise thing, get too bloodthirsty and you get everyone in this Tartarus infested place on you. Get too disappearing on anypony and they’ll look for you just to be sure you’re dead or just hiding.

Twenty-five years Anon has done this, quite frankly, he’s surprised nopony has slit his throat yet, especially not griffons or even minotaurs at the very least.

His appearance was not too kind, brusies and cuts had littered his body, a scar through his eye, his clothes still the same after twenty-five years in shame of his exile, not that there was much choice for clothes. His left part of the shirt was ripped from under his armpit and up to the left of his neckhole where he head went through, the pants were ripped in the knees and a whole chunk of his lower right leg with nothing connecting and the boots were worn and tired.

Nothing was kind about his appearance, the only thing on his person that wasn’t injuries or newer than his exile was his bloodied sword, this was his one weapon, besides the small magic he could do due to Equus' influence on him.

As the lightning came a shadow of a pony came through the light, alerting Anon to the pony’s being there. It was no ordinary pony, no pony was that tall and had wings and a horn attached to her, especially with that flowly mane.

It was Princess Celestia!!

Anon immediately drew his sword ready for a battle in the blink of an eye.

“YOU! What are you doing here?! Come to finish me off after all of these years?” Anon got in a readied stance

“Hello Anonymous, it’s been a long time” Celestia says calmly as though Anon had just thrown a welcome mat.

“What do you want? Why won’t you just leave me in peace already?” Anon asks savagely

Age may have came but Anon has never slowed down after all of these years, there was no time to slow down and Anon knew it. Anon also was thinking Celestia had come the finish him off no doubt, nopony cared about him anymore.

“I am here to offer you a chance back to Equestria” Celestia says

“Bullshit, you just want to kill me, well go ahead and do it, because I’ve killed Luna haven’t I? I’m sure I could do you as well!” Anon shouts at her

The rain was pouring behind her, lightning occasionally lighting up her body while Anon was in semi-shadows.

“I know you didn’t do it, I was wrong, the evidence was checked over until one pony by Closer Look found evidence to be rather faulty, further investigation proved you didn’t do it. A very skilled pony with lots of magic had to have killed my sister. You didn't fill the requirement.” Celestia says

“Then who was it? Who killed your damned Sister?!” Anon asks

Anon was curious to know who had caused this, who he could hunt down and kill when he was sleeping in jail or somewhere exiled for this life he got.

“A Sun Cultist, by the name of Sunlight glow” Celestia answered.

“Great, I guess he got exiled” Anon answers, still not lowering his guard.

“No, by the time we imprisoned him, a riot broke out causing ten cultist deaths and three of the royal guard's deaths as well. We were forced to execute him from a noose” Celestia replies, still no change in expression.
“So, whoop-de-doo! It took what? Twenty-five years to figure this out? You ruined my life Celestia! Don’t think you are getting forgiven for it!” Anon says, he didn't care about some Sun Cultist anymore.
“For anything of worth, I am sorry, I was clouded by my judgement” Celestia apologizes
“Liar! And even if I did want to come back how long would it be before I get killed for murdering somepony?” Anon asks Celestia seriously.

Celestia showed the slightest bit of shock, Anon was no longer a teenager, young and strapping, that shell was smashed to bits, burnt and put in an urn and then smashed again.

“What happened to you, Anon? You used to be such a nice person” Celestia asks, surprised at Anon's behaviour.

“Exile happened! Do you not understand that? You thought you’d find me in some happy life didn’t you? A life where I had a girl and new friends? Or even into some damned badass? WELL YOU’RE FUCKING WRONG!! For all these years I was hunted, hurt and even forced to have sex with WHORES to live. I lost my virginity to a WHORSE! A DEITY-DAMNED WHORSE! SHE DIDN'T EVEN HAVE ANY HUMILITY! I murdered more than your blood will ever be worth just to live! All the while you, Twilight and her friends have been having a comfy life! If I came back to Equestria, it would not be long before blood is on my hands, this red on the cave is not paint you know!” Anon ranted about his past Twenty-five years.

“I am sorry to hear that” Celestia says with regret

“Why did you come here? Personally? You didn’t really think you’d come with me in tow did you?” Anon asked

“Because…I loved you” Celestia whispered a confession before turning red.

“What did you say?” Anon asked, not sure what he heard was right in his ears

Was this true? Was Anon hearing things? The Great and Powerful Princess Celestia, ruler of the sun…was in love with him…INCONCIEVEABLE! Just why would that happen? Why him? Why was this told now?

“I…LOVED YOU!” Celestia repeated a bit louder, going even redder as she turned her head away.

“WHAT?” Anon almost dropped the sword as his ears confirmed what was said.

“I-I may have loved you at the time of your exile” Celestia admits

“You what? I don’t believe it! Why me? What’s so special about me that's not to any other Stallion in Equestria? What?” Anon asks

“You must understand, many ponies come to me hoping to be my suitor. I see only greed to advance their positions and control me, they’ve been doing that forever and ever, Anonymous. Everypony wants my favor, approval and for me to grant every little thing for their petty desires like I was the legendary Saddle Arabia genie. Even my own faithful former student is guilty of this fact, although she is the few that tries not to. You on the other hand do not see me for a way for self-gain or to get a stamp of approval for your desires, you see me as Celestia without the Princess before it, you talk to me like we’re equals, none superior or inferior to one another. It's refreshing, I respect it.” Celestia explained her reasons

Anon had listened the entire time, never stopping to stare or listen to anything that wasn’t Celestia herself

“And you love me for that?” Anon asks

“I do, you may find it strange, but I really do. You are someone with backbone, power to do what must be done, the rips in your clothes, the blood on your hands, while slightly disapproving proves that point…and I suppose the good looks as well” Celestia answers truthfully.

“You haven’t changed after all these years, have you? But Twenty-five years is too long to wait for some love, if it were anyone or anypony else, they’d have married and had a kid by now, I’m pretty much gone out of that time, out of my prime. But what about now? How do you feel now?” Anon curiously asked

“Now? The same, although it breaks my heart that my quick and clouded judgement has caused such pain.” Celestia answers

“To be honest, I think it would be best if you just left me in peace. If you truly love me, you can do better than a murdering insane human who still resents you a bit for all of these years.” Anon says

Celestia’s stoic expression just couldn’t hold, she had a sadness imprinted on my face. Anon had the smallest of guilt deep down but he had his mind made.

“You don’t have to be like this anymore, Anonymous. Your name has been cleared, you can enter Equestria at your leisure. Twilight and the others will forgive you, your friends will forgive you and so will I” Celestia tried to persuade Anon

Anon just shook his head at Celestia’s words.

“No, I can’t do that. Even if I am innocent of Luna’s death, then what? I look like a serial killer…I am one! All of these years have been so much blood that a vampire would have an orgasm! How long would it take for one misunderstanding end in somepony’s death? This is not acceptable, Celestia!! I’ve murdered and done it with a smile on my damned face! I fucked some mares just to please some bigwigs so I could get close and kill them, I’ve ended CHILDREN FOR THE LOVE OF WHATEVER ENTITY MADE THIS WORD! Criminal’s Children despite them doing nothing wrong so I could survive. Is this really a being you want hanging around? I’m not going back, there is no going back Celestia!” Anon declined this offer and turned around, refusing to face Celestia.

"You can change, it's never too late to change, Anon. Discord did, now he's living a happy life with Fluttershy" Celestia does a last chance to convince Anon.

"NO! You may love me, you may want to excuse me from all the ten bazillion other crimes I committed under this Neutral sun, but I don't. I don't spill blood to eliminate those worse that me, I don't do this because I am bored or like watching people die and suffer! I do this because I am a monster, a monster that has to kill the moral ground to survive, it's their death or mine and I always choose their death. Face it, me being back there would cause nothing but disaster, your love is too blind to see it" Anon shoots down the offer even more

"Please-" Celestia tried once more

Anon puts a hand up to interrupt her "Stop! Just leave! I am no better than Nightmare Moon, no better than Chrysalis, Tirek, that Starlight Glimmer mare and everything foul that has come since, just go! Find somepony else, you're a good mare, you'll find somepony else much better than I, as for me, when I die eventually, I'll tell Luna you say hello if I find her"

There was silence, and then Celestia took a breath and finally said:

“I accept that I cannot make you return, Anonymous. But know this, I don’t care how much blood you spilled in this neutral place, I know you did it reasonably as possible. I refuse to believe you did this for your own amusement, but know this, Equestria will take you back if you let it, Anon. I am a patient mare, I will welcome your back with open hooves” Celestia says to Anon’s back

"No, go! Just go, I am a danger to Equestria, just leave me to my bloodshed. My life in Equestria is long gone." Anon says still not facing Celestia.

For a time, there was silence, neither party talked. Finally, Celestia left into the night and not a trace of where she went was seen but Anon knew, back to Equestria…back to raise the sun she’s done for centuries. Unbeknownst to Anonymous, there were a few tears in Celestia's eyes as she back to Equestria, never to see him again.

The effects of the conversation rang in Anon’s head as he sheathed the sword, the sword that had been tool of many lives ending. What the past twenty-five years has done, that can’t go back, not now, it will not be forgotten and it cannot be forgiven.

There was no going back, this was where he belonged now, this was his home…

Author's Note

So I tried a no happy ending one-shot, tell me what you think. This is sort of the first time I tried this sort of thing so forgive me if I messed up some things.