Breaking the Fourth Wall

by jasontaylorblogs

Rating: teen
Tags: Adventure, Human, Comedy
Length: 24133

Big Macintosh and Doctor Whooves team up to help a lost stallion find a way back to the human world.

When a writer is stripped from his home and the comforts of technology and human anatomy, he becomes desperate to return to his own world. Making friends with two of Ponyville's local stallions, he sets off on a quest to find his way back. With help from historical texts and ancient lore, he and his new found friends are determined to get him home.

This story centers on an original character’s (Brain) adventure to return to the human world. Not accustomed to life as a pony, he becomes ever more desperate to find his way as the story progresses. This story also stars Big Macintosh and Doctor Whooves.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2012-05-28 19:52:19 UTC

Chapter 1: This Is Not A-mule-ing!

Chapter 1: This Is Not A-mule-ing!

Brain’s eyes darted open as a sterile scent filled his nose.  His body sprang upward, as if getting ready to leap out of harm’s way.  He hopped from the soft cushion he was laying on, spinning around to examine this new room he found himself in.  His hind hooves supported him for a moment, but he was forced to all four.  He tried to take in everything around him, trying to figure out what was going on.

The room was simple enough.  A small bed propped up on a table-like object.  A few small chairs sat in the opposite corner of the room.  There was a cabinet full of drawers, and a sink underneath it.  A few fake plants dotted the cabinets and corners of the room.  The walls, ceiling, and floor were all solid white.  Above the bed, a few random medical instruments hung from the wall.  There was a stethoscope, a blood pressure pump, and a few other instruments Brain had never seen before.

Nonetheless, he knew where he was now…  “I can’t fucking stand hospitals…  And why am I a pony…?”  He sighed deeply and bowed his head.  He stared at the things he once called hands and feet, thinking about how normal he was the night before.

Interrupting his train of thought, the door swung open, and a stallion in a white coat stepped in, carrying a clipboard in his mouth.  He placed the board on the counter by the sink, took a seat on his little rolling stool, and smiled at Brain.  “How are you doing, mister?”

Brain sighed again, hesitant to ask, “I’m fine.  But could you please tell me where I am?”

The doctor looked at him, “Why, you’re in Ponyville!  In the hospital.  Your friends said you really started freaking out before you just collapsed.”  He placed a hoof on the table behind him, reaching for the clipboard.

Brain stared at the doctor.  He tried to hide his anger, “I don’t belong here, doctor.  I ain’t a pony, and I ain’t a cartoon character…”

The doctor couldn’t hold back a chuckle.  “Well, mister, if you aren’t a pony, just what exactly are you?  And what is a ‘cartoon’?”

Brain suddenly realized that this was really happening.  He was stuck in this strange world.  No TVs, no phones, no iPods…he whimpered…  “It’s…a show where pictures move across the stage!  And people in the back give them voices…  That’s a cartoon.”  No matter what he could’ve said to try and convince the doctor he wasn’t a pony, no one would believe him.

“Sounds like fun.  I’ve never seen one of those before.  Are they good?”  The doctor started writing notes down on the paper attached to the clipboard.

Brain looked at the paper, then back to the doctor.  “You think I’m crazy, don’t you?”

The doctor smiled, “Normally I’d be compelled to tell you no, but if it’s that obvious…”

Brain sighed, “Look, I just had a little too much fun last night, that’s all.  I’ll feel better once I get woke up…”  Brain hated lying to the doctor.  In fact, he hated lying about being a human.  He definitely hated the fact that nobody would believe his story.  Then another set of thoughts popped into his head…

I’m a pony…in my favorite cartoon world?  But if that’s the case…then does that mean this world is canon?  If so, maybe I can get some ‘spoilers’ and take some bets back home!  But first I have to get home…  And this world means no more Dan Bull or Facebook.  And what about my notebook?!  I think it’d be best if I kept a journal!  Maybe it landed here with me?

“Ahem!”  The doctor snapped Brain back to reality.  “I believe this belongs to you.”  He handed Brain a notebook, spiral bound, with a pen stuck in the spirals.

“My notebook!  Thanks!  Where’d you get it?”  Brain snatched the book from the doctor, bear-hugging it.

“Your friends said they found it next to you this morning.  It was covered in drool.”  The doctor laughed.  He opened the door and handed Brain a piece of paper.

Brain took the piece of paper from the doctor, walking out of the small room.  He followed the doctor through a long expanse of hallways, until finally reaching a larger room full of chairs and a reception desk.  In the corner of the room, six ponies sat around each other whispering.

As Brain took in the sight of the room, his mind immediately registered the six ponies.  Applejack, who had greeted him when he awoke.  Twilight Sparkle, the studious unicorn.  Rarity, the gem-loving dress maker.  Pinkie Pie, the party pony and fan-made sociopath.  Rainbow Dash, the brave and braggart pony.  And Fluttershy, the kind and gentle pony.

They saw him walk in behind the doctor, and greeted him with ‘hellos’ and a plethora of questions.  He tried to answer whatever they asked.  A few questions he avoided, but for the most part, they were satisfied.  The doctor finally stepped up and interrupted their interview.

“Excuse, mister, but I don’t believe I ever got your name.”  He extended his hoof, almost as if for a handshake.

Brain extended his hoof, performing some sort of hoof-bump, in general fashion to a human fist-bump.  “The name’s Brain.  I guess once I wake up a bit more I’ll be feeling better.”  He smiled, rubbing his head with his hoof.

Rainbow Dash asked bluntly, “What kind of name is Brain?”

Everypony in the room shot her a death stare, except for Brain himself.  “It’s okay, everybody.  I’m used to that kind of reaction.  I guess my parents just thought I’d be a genius…  Boy, were they wrong…”

Fluttershy noticed the mark on his flank.  “So you’re a writer?”

Brain’s jaw dropped in shock, “Well, sort of.  You could call it that.  How’d you know?”

Twilight Sparkle pointed at his flank.  “Your cutie mark is a pen and piece of paper.  What else would you be?”

Brain craned his neck to look at the cutie mark.  He knew that, in the My Little Pony universe, a cutie mark manifests itself on a pony’s flank when their special talent becomes apparent.  He laughed, “I guess I have talent somewhere in this noggin after all…”

Pinkie giggled, “Obviously!  It is your cutie mark!”

Brain plopped into one of the chairs beside the ponies.  He closed his eyes and muttered, “I wonder if I’ll ever see the boys again?”

The doctor looked at him in confusion, “Who are ‘the boys’, Brain?”

Brain chuckled, “Some old buddies back home.  They’d never believe me if I told them this was happening.”  He hopped off the chair back to his hooves.  He tapped one hoof lightly on the floor, trying to get used to the feeling of being a quadruped.  “Is there any place around here I can get a beer?”

The ponies looked at him, puzzled by what he had asked.  Twilight asked, “What’s a ‘beer’?”

Brain’s jaw dropped.  “I know this is a child-friendly world, but you don’t even have beer?!”  He hung his head low, feeling an emptiness grow in his gut.  “Beer is a beverage that adults drink to become intoxicated.  It distracts the mind from daily events.”

Applejack slapped him on the back with a hoof, “You’re talking ‘bout cider ain’t ya?”  A smile grew on her face.

“Cider?  Yeah, I guess that would work.”  He lifted his head to look at her.

“You want some cider, eh?  I know just the stallion to get you a fix!  Best cider in Ponyville!”  Applejack started walking towards the door.  The other ponies followed her.

Brain looked at the doctor, “So uh…I’m safe to drink cider, right?”

The doctor chuckled, “Of course you are!   You’re what, twenty-five?”  He started walking back into his office, leaving Brain to his business.

“Yeah… Okay, take me to him, if you don’t mind.”  He turned back to the ponies behind him, and followed them out the door.

Outside the hospital, Brain’s mind was flooded with so many beautiful colors and scents and voices, it was almost overwhelming.  He stopped periodically to just sit and take in the sights.  He couldn’t believe just how picture perfect this world was compared to the show he loved so much.  He couldn’t believe he was living the life of a pony.  He tried to imagine how jealous all of the other Bronies back home would be if he could prove this was happening.

He followed the ponies- who he continued referring to as the ‘Mane Six’ in his mind- to a small white fence that surrounded a large barnyard and orchard.  He was actually standing outside Sweet Apple Acres…  The scent of apples filled his nose, and his stomach grumbled hungrily.

“Heh…I guess I didn’t get any breakfast this morning…  Come to think of it, I never ate dinner last night…”  Brain shook his head, trying to run the hunger from his mind.  He followed the ponies through the white fence and into the large barn in front of them.

“Hey, Big Mac, you here?”  Applejack called into the barn, her voice echoing back and forth.  No voice called back, so she just shrugged her shoulders and stepped out of the barn.  “He don’t seem to be here.  He might be over at the café with Doctor Whooves.”  She turned to head back toward the main body of the town.

“Doctor…Whooves?”  Brain had heard the name so many times on the internet.  He knew Doctor Whooves simply as a background pony with an hourglass cutie mark.  He’d also read plenty of fan-fictions of Doctor Whooves being some space-time adventuring pony, in true fashion to Doctor Who.

“Yep, they get together every day for lunch.  Not sure why, but they seem to get along.”  Applejack started trotting along, following the path back into town.  The other ponies followed at an equal pace.  Brain sighed, and then followed them.  He wasn’t feeling too good about disturbing someone’s lunch rendezvous.

The group quickly approached the café Applejack had mentioned.  Sitting at one of the outdoor tables were a large red stallion and a slightly scrawnier brown one, both munching on what appeared to be flower sandwiches.  As Applejack trotted right up to the red one, Brain assumed that he was Big Macintosh.  After all, he was the only red stallion Brain could remember seeing on the show.  If the red one was Big Mac, then the brown one had to be Doctor Whooves…

Big Macintosh and Doctor Whooves sat at their usual table in the outdoor café, waiting for their food to arrive.  Every day at 11 am, the two would get together for lunch.  Though they both did two different jobs, and worked on different sides of town, they had a lot of interests in common.  For instance, they both enjoyed a game of Apple Jacks from time to time.  Other times, they enjoyed going for trots in the Everfree Forest.

“Ain’t been too much commotion ‘round here lately.  Hope it stays that way.”  Big Macintosh took a large bite from his sandwich.

Doctor Whooves took a sip from his cup, cleared his throat, and asked, “What about that monster that attacked Equestria last month?  I heard he almost took over the whole world!  Of course, that’s absurd.  The Princess would never let something like that happen.”

Big Mac scoffed, “I don’t wanna be rude, but you can’t trust Celestia with everything.  There’s some stuff she can’t handle.  Wanna know a secret?”  Big Mac was annoyed with how little news had spread about the events from the previous month.  He had witnessed everything go down.

Doctor took a bite from his sandwich, waving his hoof, “Go ahead, shoot.”

Big Mac smiled, “You wouldn’t believe me if I told ya it was Fluttershy that saved us, would ya?”

Doctor started choking on his sandwich, laughing as he tried to swallow.  “You’re right, I wouldn’t believe you!”  He finally got the food down.

“Eeyup, I didn’t think so.”  Big Mac took another bite from his sandwich.

Doctor watched as a group of mares passed by their table, eyeballing Big Mac.  “Is it just me, or has every mare that passed by today given you a…longing…look?”  He raised an eyebrow.

Big Mac blushed, and chuckled, “Well, you ever wonder why they call me Big Macintosh?”  He winked.

Doctor’s expression twisted into one of slight disgust, “Too much information, Big Mac!”  His face flushed red.

“Ha ha ha!  Well, ya asked, didn’t ya?”  He took another bite from the sandwich.

Doctor quickly looked around for anything that could change the subject.  He noticed Applejack and her friends trotting along the road, heading straight for their table.  “Uh…isn’t that your sister?”  He pointed a hoof in her direction.

Big Mac turned his head just in time to see Applejack trot right up beside him.  “How’s it goin’, sis?  Need somethin’?”  He smiled at his little sister.

Applejack laughed, “Sure do, Big Mac!  Got a stallion that’s new in town an’ he wants to try your cider!”  She turned as Brain trailed up behind the rest of the ponies.

Big Mac and Doctor looked at the stallion.  With a chuckle, Big Mac said, “Looks like you’ve got a twin, Doctor.”  Everypony looked back and forth from Brain to Doctor.  They did look kind of alike.

“Ha ha, that’s very funny, Big Mac.  What’s your name, stranger?”  Doctor extended a hoof like the doctor did before.

Brain hoof-bumped the stallion, “My name’s Brain, and I’m guessing you’re Doctor Whooves?”

“He sure is.  And I’m Big Macintosh.  Nice to meet ya, Brain.”  Big Mac chuckled.

Doctor squirmed uneasily in his seat, until he finally couldn’t hold it in any longer.  He laughed, “What kind of right-minded mare names their colt ‘Brain’?”  He almost fell out of his chair, until Applejack kicked him in the side.

Brain rubbed his head again, “I don’t know, maybe the same kind of mare that names their colt ‘Doctor’?”  Doctor immediately stopped laughing, whereas the whole group busted out at that.

Twilight looked at the sky.  “I hate to be rude everypony, but we’re late!”  She pulled out a map of Everfree Forest from the pouch at her side.

“Late for what, Twilight?”  Doctor asked.

Rainbow suddenly remembered, “We were supposed to meet Zecora an hour ago!”

Applejack said, “We’re gonna help her pick ingredients for some new potion she’s makin’.”

The six ponies, without waiting for another word, darted off toward the entrance to Everfree Forest, leaving Brain all alone with the other two stallions.

Big Mac kicked a chair out from under the table, “Have a seat, Brain.  No sense in just standing like a mule.  Relax a bit.”

Doctor called the server over to them, “Three orders of Sweet Apple Cider, please.”

The server nodded, and headed straight through the doors into the café.  The trio of stallions exchanged looks in silence for a few moments.  Brain found himself tempted to stare at Doctor Whooves, to which Doctor responded negatively.

“What?  Is there something on my face?”  He had an angry frown.

Brain thought carefully about what he said next.  “What?  No…nothing.  You just look like an actor I knew back home.”

“An actor, you say?  Mind giving me his name?”  Doctor smiled, thinking it was a complement.

Brain hesitated when he said, “I believe his name is David Tennant…  He played in a show called Doctor Who.”  The instant he said the show’s name, he slapped a hoof over his mouth.

Doctor was obviously not amused, “Ha!  That’s so funny!  You made a pun with my name!  You aren’t the first to do that.”  Big Mac chuckled at Doctor’s reaction.

Brain tried as hard as he could to make amends, adding, “I’m completely serious right now!  He was the star of a play called Doctor Who!  It was about a guy who could travel through time and fix things that went wrong!”  Brain smiled sheepishly, hoping it worked.

Big Macintosh helped him out by adding, “I’d watch it.”

Doctor settled down.  He laughed, “Sorry for overreacting!  It’s just…ponies are all the time taking my name and making puns.  It gets old.”  He took a sip of his drink.

Brain smiled, “Believe me, I know exactly how you feel.  My name isn’t exactly normal.”  He hesitated before asking his next question, “Do you guys believe in other worlds?  You know, besides this one?”

Doctor looked at him with an eyebrow raised, “I don’t see why not.  It’s possible, but I wouldn’t expect any aliens to come raid our farms or anything.”

Big Mac added, “Of course there’re other worlds.  That’s where the monster came from.  I remember goin’ there with everyone else.  It was weird.  Eeyup, it was real weird.”  He looked at Brain intently, reading into his body language.

“You’ve seen other worlds, Big Mac?  And why didn’t you invite me?”  Doctor laughed.

“You were too busy wrecking the place to come.”  Big Mac chuckled in reply, before returning his attention to Brain.  “You ain’t from Equestria, are ya?  Ya got the same feel as the monster’s Shadows:  Otherworldly.”

Brain raised his head high, looking into Big Mac’s eyes, trying to determine whether he was teasing or being serious.

“I don’t know if you’ve ever heard of us, but I’m a human…”

Chapter 2: A Mule's Endeavor

Chapter 2: A Mule's Endeavor

The server brought out a tray to their table.  It had three moderate-sized bottles of a dark red liquid on it.  She placed one bottle each in front of the three silent stallions.  Without saying a word, Doctor nodded in thanks, and the server walked away.  In silence, the three stallions popped the tops from their bottles, and drank down the Sweet Apple Cider.  The drink nearly made Brain shudder.  He hadn’t expected such a strong taste of alcohol from a drink in Ponyville.

Big Macintosh downed his cider in mere moments.  He slammed the bottle onto the table, and looked at Brain with curiosity in his eyes.  “You said you’re a human, right?”

Brain set his bottle gently on the table, taking a deep breath.  “That’s right.  A human.  You ever heard of us?”

Doctor Whooves couldn’t hold back a laugh.  “Okay, sure you are!  And I’m the pony master of time and space!  Heck, I think Big Mac might be the apple fairy!”  For the second time, Doctor almost fell out of his chair in a fit of laughter, before a kick to the leg from Big Mac set him straight.

Big Mac scratched his head with his hoof, “Maybe Mythol ain’t completely crazy after all.”  Doctor and Brain looked at him quizzically.

“Uh…Who is Mythol?”  Doctor asked.

Big Mac blushed, “Uh…she’s a friend of mine.  I tend to hang out with her when we finish our lunch.”

“Hmm?  So that’s why our rendezvous always ends at two, right?”  Doctor let a grin stretch across his face.  “And what do you and Mythol do, if I may ask?”  Brain knew exactly where Doctor was going with this, and let out a small laugh.

Big Mac stuttered, “I-it ain’t what ya think!  We just talk, mostly.  She likes to go on an’ on about them ‘human’ things.”  Brain’s eyes lit up.

“What exactly do you mean ‘human things’?”  He slammed his hoof on the table.

Big Mac flinched at this sudden movement, “She’s always talking ‘bout some weird animals that stand on two legs an’ have fingers and toes comin’ from their hooves.”  Big Mac scratched his head again, turning away from the table.

Doctor asked bluntly, “Is she completely insane?  And how come I’ve never seen her around town?”

Big Mac laughed, “She lives a little ways outta town.  An’ I guess if Brain here believes in humans, she can’t be too crazy.”

Brain snatched his cider up off the table and took one large swig.  He opened the pouch at his side and pulled his notebook from it.  He ripped the cap from the top of the pen and turned to the first blank page.  He looked at Big Mac and Doctor, and then began writing furiously.  Doctor tried to speak, but when he did Brain shushed him.  Brain suddenly had the urge to write down everything that had happened to him the last few hours.  In an instant, his will to write had returned.  Albeit the things he was writing were copy-written…

After about three minutes of writing, he capped the pen and tossed the notebook in his pouch.  He looked at Big Mac and commanded, “Take me to her.”

Big Mac looked at him like he was crazy, “Nope.  Last thing I want is her thinkin’ I’m makin’ fun of her by telling someone else about her ideas.”  Big Mac wasn’t an idiot.  The last thing he wanted was to evoke the wrath of a mare.

Doctor looked at him curiously, “I would actually like to meet her, myself.”  He smiled.

Big Mac cast an angry glare in his direction.  “Ain’t gonna happen, Doctor.”

Brain downed the rest of his cider, then slammed the bottle on the table, “Look Big Mac, don’t fuck with me right now!  If there’s someone in this damn town that can help me get home, no one is standing in my way!”  The ponies around their table looked at Brain as if he were a psycho.

Big Mac raised his hoof to Brain.  “Okay, okay!  Just calm down Brain, you’re makin’ people stare…”

Doctor quickly stood up, addressing the ponies around them, “I’m terribly sorry for my friend’s behavior, please ignore him.”  He cleared his throat.

Brain looked around at the group of ponies that were staring in his direction.  He sighed, “S-sorry… I just sort of…lost my cool.”  He sat back in his chair, taking a deep breath.

Big Mac turned to face the ponies, “It’s alright fellas, he’s just a little outta place.  Gettin’ used to things around here.”  He turned back to Brain.  “Alright, if it means so much to ya, I’ll take you to see Mythol.  C’mon, let’s go ahead an’ go.”  Big Mac stood up from his chair, nodding at Brain to do so as well.

Doctor chuckled, “I hope you don’t expect me to just stay here.  I’m definitely coming with you.”  He got up from his chair, trotting to the other side of the table.

Brain smiled, “Thanks.  I appreciate it Big Mac.”  He got out of his chair, making sure he had his pen and notebook safely secured in his pouch, then followed as Big Mac and Doctor started to walk down the road.

The trio of stallions trotted along the road, Big Mac steadily growing more apprehensive and regretful of this decision.  Brain, on the other hand, was getting ever more excited as they travelled down the road.  If this Mythol mare actually knew something about humans, it could make his stay here a little shorter.  Doctor was pleasantly enjoying their trot, wondering just what Mythol looked like, and what she had done to win Big Mac’s ‘favor’- a feat that every mare in town apparently wanted to accomplish.

It didn’t take too long before they arrived at a small house built along the road.  It was one floor, and looked like it could easily house three or four ponies.  It was nicely decorated on the outside, done up as if some roadside attraction for travelers to stare at as they passed.  Big Mac hesitated and slowed his pace as they approached the house.  Doctor loved every minute of it.

“Something wrong, Big Mac?  You seem a bit hesitant.”  Doctor chuckled, stopping beside his friend.

Big Mac sighed, “Eeyup…Like I said, I don’t want her to think I’m makin’ fun of her by bringing y’all here.”

Brain placed a hoof on Big Mac’s shoulder, “Don’t worry, buddy!  I promise I won’t do anything to ruin whatever you two have going on.  Where I come from we have something called the ‘Bro Code’.  Cock-blocking is strictly against the rules.”  He let out a loud laugh, obviously thinking he was being funny.

And Doctor sure thought he was.  He laughed, “Don’t worry Big Mac; human-pony’s got your back!”

Big Mac gave them both an evil glare, “Let’s just get this over with…”  He bowed his head low as he stepped up the small staircase to Mythol’s door.  He tapped on it five times, in rhythm with the ‘Shave-and-a-hair-cut, two-bits’ jingle.

A tall, thin, blue-maned, red-coat mare answered the door.  At first glance, Doctor’s jaw dropped in awe.  Big Mac’s face flushed red when he saw Doctor’s expression.  The mare said excitedly, “Ooh, Big Mac, you’re early today!  I haven’t even had a chance to wash up yet!”  A cute, innocent smile covered her face.

Big Mac hurriedly stuttered, “Uh…actually Mythol…  I gotta friend that wants to talk to ya about humans…”  A disappointed expression replaced Mythol’s smile.

“Aww…okay then.  Come on in, make yourselves comfortable.”  She waved at the two stallions behind Big Mac.

Doctor and Brain followed Big Mac into the house and over to a set of couches.  Doctor sat in the smallest chair he could find, not wanting to impose.  Brain took a seat on the couch opposite Big Mac, just in case Mythol wanted to sit beside the stallion.  Big Mac glanced over at Doctor to see him laughing to himself.

“Somethin’ funny, Doctor?”  You could hear the irritation in Big Mac’s voice.

Doctor chuckled, “Oh no, nothing.  I mean, she did seem really disappointed you weren’t here for whatever it is she should’ve cleaned up for.”  He choked down another laugh.

Brain raised one eyebrow at Doctor, crossing his arms over his chest.  He said bluntly, “No need to make fun, Doctor.  Just because Big Mac’s getting more mare plot than you doesn’t mean you should jealously make fun of him.”  Big Mac’s face twisted into one of both embarrassment and enjoyment.  Doctor instantly stopped laughing, instead giving Brain an angry look.

“Very funny, Brain.” Doctor said through clenched teeth.  Turning back to Big Mac, “At any rate, where did Mythol go?”

Big Mac shrugged, “She prob’bly went to get her box of human stuff.”

Mythol suddenly burst through the door at the other end of the room.  Looking through the doorway, it appeared to lead into a bedroom.  She exclaimed, “Which one of you wanted to know about humans?”  In an instant, as she was speaking, her voice changed from one reminiscent of a ditz, to one of a serious school teacher.  The sudden change of tone caught Brain completely off guard.

So much so, he stuttered as he said, “Uh… Th-that’d be me, ma’am.”  He raised his hoof.

She smiled, “You can call me Mythol.  And you are?”

Doctor called from his chair, “Name’s Doctor Whooves.”

Brain simply replied, “Brain’s my name.”

“Well then, Brain, Doctor, Big Mac, listen up!  A lot of ponies call me crazy when I tell them about humans.  You promise you won’t laugh at me?”  She lowered her head, sitting beside Big Mac and opening the metal box she had been carrying.

Big Mac put an arm around her, “Eeyup, I promise.”

Brain nodded, “You bet I won’t!”

Doctor stated bluntly, “I honestly can’t promise anything.  I think that cider is getting to me.”

Mythol smiled, placing the box on the table in front of her.  She sang out, “Good, then let’s begin!”

Mythol pulled out an article cut out of some really old newspaper.  It clearly depicted a bipedal creature with what appeared to be a t-shirt on.  Of course, the picture could have been anything.  It could have been another pony stretching, for the entire picture’s detail.  She showed it to the three of them, explaining what she thought it was.

Next from the box came a storybook that looked as if it were centuries old.  She turned page after page, until she found one particular picture.  In the background of the picture it showed a small piece of paper with the classic ‘gingerbread-man cookie cutter’ shape drawn on it.  She thought that it might be a child’s version of what could be considered a human.

The next thing Mythol pulled from the box made Brain’s heart leap to his throat.  It was a full-color, full-body picture of a group of real-world humans, and it was missing the bottom right corner.  In fact, it was a picture of himself and his friends at the bar the night before.  He even remembered asking the bartender to take the picture.  They had stopped by the local Wal-Mart to have the photos developed.  It dawned on him that the picture Mythol was holding was the same picture he placed into the back cover of his notebook.

He pulled his notebook out of the pouch with haste, flipping to the back cover.  Sure enough, the bottom right corner of the picture was all that remained of the picture he had placed in the notebook.  He leaped from his chair, “Mythol, where did you get that photo?!”

Big Mac’s expression shifted to unease as Brain raised his voice.  “Somethin’ wrong, Brain?”

“Yes!  That’s a picture of me and my friends!”  He lifted his notebook to show the single remaining corner of the picture.  Mythol placed her photo to the notebook, lining it up with the corner.

Her eyes lit up, and a large smile grew on her face, “He’s right, Big Mac!  The picture fits!”  Doctor hopped from his chair, unsure of what to think.

Big Mac moved a little closer to the photo.  “Well, I’ll be…  It does fit!”  Big Mac scratched his head with his hoof.

“So…does this mean humans are real?”  Doctor lifted a hoof into the air, unsure of how to interpret what had just happened.

“You bet your ass they’re real, and I’m one of ‘em!”  Brain laughed in happiness and excitement.  Now that there was some proof humans were real, maybe he could make progress getting home.

“Well, if this is yours, you can have it back.”  Mythol offered him the photo.

“No, you can keep it.  I’ve got plenty more back home.  But now that you see humans are real, there’s still the matter of figuring out how to get me back home…

Mythol laughed, “Well, there’s always Daring Do and the Otherworldly Treasure.”

Brain looked at Mythol with confusion, “What in the world is that?”

“You’ve never heard of the Daring Do series of books?  You must be from another world!”  Doctor chimed in with a tone of disappointment.

“The book talks about Daring Do’s journey to some mysterious temple far on the other side of what geographers say would be the real-world Everfree Forest.  It gives pretty specific instructions how to get to it, assuming it’s real.”  Mythol smiled, holding up a notecard she filled out about the book.

Brain stared at the notes scribbled on the card.  “Where can I find the book?”  Big Mac and Doctor looked at him as if he were crazy.

“Twilight Sparkle owns all of Daring Do’s books.  You can probably get it from her.”  Mythol sat down on the couch next to Big Mac.  She felt satisfied that some other pony was really interested in her human research.

“I guess I’m heading to the library.”  Brain turned to leave the house.

Big Mac leaped from the couch, holding a hoof out to stop Brain.  He shook his head, “You ain’t really gonna trust some old filly stories, are ya?”

Brain looked at Big Mac with a fire in his eyes, “I don’t have a choice now, do I?  If Daring Do holds the secret to my way home, I’m going for it!”

Doctor got up from his chair, “This should be a fun misadventure; don’t you think Big Mac?”  He walked over to Brain’s side.

Big Mac looked at him in horror, “You can’t be serious, Doctor!”

Mythol smiled, “Just think, if you guys do find a way to the human world, you’ll become super famous!”

“It’s settled then!  Are you going to help us, Big Mac?”  Doctor smiled at him.

“Nope!  No way am I gonna go on a wild goose chase!”  Big Mac turned his head away from the two of them.

Mythol frowned, “You don’t think the human world is real?  But…”  She sniffled.

Big Mac immediately jumped to her side, putting a hoof on her shoulder.  “It’s not that, darlin’!  It’s just…uh… I ain’t gonna trust a book to find the way.  It might be right, but I doubt it.”  He looked angrily over to Doctor.  “We’re gonna have to do a bit more lookin’ than just readin’ some little filly stories.”

Brain smiled slyly, “So, you’re going to help?”

Big Mac sighed in irritation.  He was trapped now.  If he didn’t help them, Mythol would definitely be mad at him.  On the other hoof, if he did find a way to the human world, she would owe him big time.  He smiled as he thought of the many ways she would repay his hard work…

“Alright, we better start lookin’.  The longer we wait, the longer you gotta stay in Equestria.”  Big Mac smiled at the pair of stallions.  He bent down and whispered something in Mythol’s ear, then turned to join his friends.

Brain left the house with a fire in his eyes.  He knew it wouldn’t be too awful long before he made it home, one way or another.  Doctor had an expression on his face as if this were all just some game.  Big Mac shrugged his shoulders as the door closed behind them.  To each of them, this seemed like the perfect opportunity to do something.

For Big Macintosh, he wanted to impress Mythol.  For Doctor Whooves, he wanted to do something out of the norm.  For Brain, this was a chance to find a way home.

The trio trotted down the road with determination.  No matter what it took, they would find something about the human world somewhere in some text.  If Daring Do’s book didn’t give them what they needed, then surely some other old books about Everfree Forest would.

“Nothing is going to stand in my way!”

Chapter 3: An Old Mule's Tale

Chapter 3: An Old Mule's Tale

The trio found themselves in the Ponyville library, scanning over shelves upon shelves of books.  Until Twilight Sparkle returned from helping Zecora with her potions, the Daring Do book was a lost cause.  With the help of the baby dragon Spike, they had gathered quite a wide range of books about Everfree Forest.  Ranging from histories to plays to geographical documents, a nice pile of literature had gathered on the floor at the center of the library.

While Big Mac, Spike, and Doctor continued scouring the shelves for more related materials, Brain took it upon himself to begin his research.  He sat firmly on the floor against the wall, reading page after page of material and scanning every word for hidden meaning.  If there was any mention of some human world or some strange temple in Everfree Forest, it would probably be cryptic.

One book mentioned a golden glow emanating from behind some massive waterfall.  Another book told about strange disappearances occurring in some unknown grove of the forest.  A scroll Brain read spoke of a massive stone tree at the dead center of the forest that may or may not contain an endless pit.  Brain saw a map that showed a black hole in the very corner of it, supposedly where no cartographer ever returned from.

One book he found told about a war that happened between the three neighboring nations of Equestria, Everfree, and Zakelon.  The book was dated to be over ten-thousand years old.  It spoke of one particular battle.  The battle ended when a giant tree burst from the ground and a silver orb absorbed the souls of every dead soldier.  During the battle, Equestrian forces were overwhelmed by the seemingly endless waves of Everfree soldiers.  Some survivors claimed that some of the soldiers stood on two legs and had appendages coming from their hooves.

“Dammit! So fucking close!”  Brain slammed the book shut, placing it to his side.

Big Mac walked over to him, “What, did you find somethin’?”

Brain sighed, “Almost.  The book talked about a ten-thousand year old battle between Equestria and Everfree.  Survivors said some Everfree soldiers stood on two legs and had fingers and toes.”

Big Mac didn’t see the problem, “Doesn’t that give us an answer?”

Brain shook his head, “No.  They also said a tree magically burst from the ground and a silver orb started absorbing dead soldiers’ souls.”

Big Mac looked at Brain in disappointment.  “Y’know that monster I told ya about?  Well, let’s just say that tree story ain’t a lie.”  Doctor looked over at Big Mac, holding back a laugh.

“Again, I’m the pony master of time and space…”  Doctor chuckled.

Big Mac stamped his hoof, “You ain’t gotta believe me, but I watched it happen with my own eyes.  You can ask any of AJ’s friends.  They saw it too.”

Brain laughed, “You’re serious right now, aren’t you Big Mac?”

Big Mac felt insulted, “Of course I am!  I ain’t got a reason to lie, do I?  I wanna find this thing just as much as y-…  Well, just as much a Doctor Idiot over there.”

Brain picked the book back up and opened it to the page he had left it on.  He read the section aloud.

“A battle like no other, the Ever-Pony battle was the single deciding factor in the conflict between Everfree and Equestria.  Surviving witnesses have delivered to us personal accounts of just exactly what happened.  According to a few Equestrian military soldiers, the soldiers of Everfree were a never-ending force.  One pony even went as far as to say ‘The enemy forces never stopped.  They continued pouring from the edge of the woods for hours on end.  Many of the Everfree soldiers ran upon two legs, carrying axes and swords in their front hooves.  However, these hooves had strange appendages extending from them, almost like the toes of a cat or dog.’

Another soldier recounted the story of what ended the battle in favor of Equestria.  ‘Our general had been stabbed right through the heart by a bipedal Everfree soldier’s sword.  Our captain sliced the offending soldier in half before kneeling to his wife’s side.  They exchanged unheard words, before a massive golden tree shot from the ground and enveloped them.  Then, a shining silver ball flew from the tree, and like a vacuum sucked up the souls from all of the fallen soldiers, Equestrian or otherwise.  Every soldier dropped their weapons, and the Everfree forces fled back into the woods.  The bipedal soldiers’ captain screamed, ‘Return to the gate, comrades!  We are beaten!’

Nopony has yet been able to decipher these cryptic witness accounts for any deep meaning.”

Brain closed the book and set it aside again.

“That sounds about right, actually.  If what he showed us was real, which it was.”  Twilight stepped into the library, followed by her friends.

Fluttershy told Brain, “The parts about the tree and the orb are true.  I don’t know about the bipedal soldiers, though.  He never showed us them.”

Doctor walked over to join the group.  He laughed, “Who exactly is ‘he’?”

“Fei-” Rainbow Dash started to say, when Fluttershy interjected.

“I would prefer not to bring up the name.”  She glared at Rainbow Dash.

Brain sighed impatiently, “As much as I would love to keep hearing about some monster that I don’t even know anything about, I would really like it if you could just help me find some more stuff related to what’s inside Everfree Forest.  You know, some giant black hole or a temple or even a fucking glowing waterfall…”  He rolled his eyes, picking up the next text in the pile beside him.

“Someone’s in a pissy mood right now, isn’t he?”  Doctor chuckled, tossing a book straight into Brain’s lap.  “This is supposed to be a compilation of entries in a journal some princess kept a few thousand years ago.  According to the publisher, the journal was found in some vaults under the castle.”

“…’Supposed to be,’ you say?  Yes well, I’m sure that black hole on that map is supposed to be a real thing…”  Brain’s face distorted in annoyance.

For the last three hours he had sat in the corner of the library, reading book after book, hoping to find something that could tell him where his way home was.  All he found was lore and tomfoolery.  He let out another sigh and picked up the book Doctor gave him, deciding that if this book didn’t have the answers, none of them would.

His eyes grew wide as he read the very first page aloud,

“To most ponies, the nation of Everfree has been a source of wildlife and fresh plants for thousands of years.  But to the Triad, it holds an even darker secret.  The Princess of Love has delivered a message to the Princess of Luna and me concerning a strange phenomenon taking place deep within her kingdom.

According to Love, a temple has suddenly appeared from the ground, swallowing an entire city in its wake.  From this temple, strange creatures emerged.  These creatures are said to stand upon two legs, and have appendages extending from their front and hind hooves.  According to her scouts’ reports, the creatures refer to themselves as ‘Humans from Earth’.

I may have to send my own scouts to investigate this phenomenon.  Perhaps Zulema and Merlene will be up to the task?”

~The Memoires of Princess of Sol, Equestrian Royalty c.10, 000 years prior to publishing

Brain set the book aside, trying to decide whether or not he should rip the page out of the book.  He decided it best not to.  “From the mouth of the Princess of Sol, eh?  Surely these memoires are accurate.  No one would tolerate the misuse of their princess’s name, would they?”  Brain looked over to the group of mares that were listening to his reading.

Fluttershy looked at her friends, nodding.  She spoke softly, “I guess that explains how the war started.  And how Zulema and Merlene got killed.  I don’t think the publisher would lie about that.”

Doctor walked over to the group, carrying another book, “The publisher’s notes on this one say it’s the memoires of a Princess of Love.”  He handed the book to Brain.

Before opening this one, Brain suddenly remembered the reason they had waited for so long in the library.  “Twilight, do you have all of Daring Do’s books?”

Rainbow Dash’s ears perked up.  Twilight replied, “Yeah, all of them, as far as I know.  Why?”

“I need Daring Do and the Otherworldy Treasure.  Do you have it?”  Brain asked.

Rainbow Dash spoke up, “I just finished reading that one the other day.  I’ll have to go get it from my house.”

Brain looked over to Big Mac, a grin growing on his face.  “I guess we’ll see just how accurate your marefriend is.”

Big Mac blushed, hoping Applejack didn’t hear that.  She did.  “Hmm, what’s all this about a marefriend Big Mac?” she asked with a sly smile.

“Uh…it’s n-nothin’ AJ.  Don’t worry about it!”  Big Mac stuttered in embarrassment.

Just as Applejack was about to say something else, Brain cleared his throat loudly.  He started reading the first entry in the Princess of Love’s memoires.

“Sending that letter to the Princess of Sol was a horrible idea!  Everything has gone downhill ever since her scouts arrived at the temple…  My subjects are steadily growing more worried about an impending Equestrian invasion.  So many complaints and concerns have reached my ears in the last week; I truly have no idea how to handle this.  The humans keep spawning from the temple, and they refuse to leave.

As far as my subjects are concerned, we’re being invaded on two different fronts.  I only wish Sol would call her scouts back, but they seem determined to investigate the temple thoroughly.  If only she would listen to me, then maybe all of this could be put to rest.  I can find my own way to send the humans back, if she would only leave our business to us!

Oh no!  I think I hear commotion coming from the entrance hall.  Things can only get worse from here…  Damn it, Sol!”

~The Memoires of Princess of Love, Everfree Royalty c.9, 999 years prior to publishing

“That settles it.  There was a temple in Everfree that allowed humans to cross into this world.  Now I just have to find it.  Rainbow, can you go get that book for me, please?”  Brain slammed the book shut, a fire in his eyes.  Both Doctor and Big Mac smiled, knowing that, at least ten-thousand years ago, the portal was real.

Doctor laughed cheerfully, “Well everypony, I guess we’d best get ready for an adventure, eh?”  He rested an arm on Big Mac’s shoulder, an enthusiastic grin on his face.

Twilight looked at him in confusion, “Do you mean you’re actually going to try and find this temple?”  She facehooved.

Brain scoffed as he said, “Oh yeah.  It’s real, that’s a fact.  We just have to find it.”  He stood up, placing a hoof on Big Mac’s other shoulder.

Big Mac laughed, “Eeyup.  Even if we gotta walk through every inch of the forest, we’re gonna find that temple.”

Applejack looked at him like he was insane.  She screamed, “I knew you were a gullible pony, but I didn’t think ya were this bad!”

Big Mac laughed, “Sometimes it’s nice to have a little fun.  Even if the temple ain’t around no more, the journey’ll be fun.”

Doctor placed a hoof on Applejack’s head in a condescending manner.  He chuckled, “Come on, Applejack!  You ponies go on adventures all the time.  I think it’s about time we get to have some fun.”

Brain muttered, “Besides, I still want to go home.  I miss my comfy bed and air-conditioning…”

Fluttershy looked at him with a smile, “Did you say something, Brain?”

He jumped, “N-nothing!  Just thinking out loud…”

Rainbow Dash extended her wings, exclaiming, “I’ll be back in a minute with the book, Brain!”  She took off out of the window, headed for her home in the clouds.

The group of ponies sat around talking to each other for a few minutes.  Most of the time was spent with the mares questioning the stallions’ intentions.  They knew Brain wanted to go home, but Big Mac and Doctor were two completely different stories.  While Big Mac tried his hardest to keep quiet about Mythol, Doctor was happy to give away his motives.  After all, all he wanted was to have a little fun and adventure.

Before long, Rainbow Dash zoomed through the window, handing the book to Brain.  He looked at the book as if it were a million dollars.  His eyes lit up as he examined the cover.  Immediately he noticed a giant stone figure in the background, and a few specks of peach color in front of it.  His hopeful mind assumed that they were humans in front of his way home.

“Well, let’s see what we’ve got…”

Chapter 4: A Mule's Gold

Chapter 4: A Mule's Gold

An hour passed as Brain read the Daring Do book to the crowd of ponies that had gathered in the library.  Every word was read with care and analyzed carefully for hidden meaning or accuracy to the memoires they had just read.  Though the book just seemed to be an average adventure book, Brain held high hopes that at some point it would reach a clue about his way home.  As Brain read the book, Doctor took it upon himself to write down any important details in the notebook.

After reading nearly the entire book to the ponies, Brain had almost given up hope.  He took a deep breath and placed the book on the floor.  He shook his head in disappointment, “Twenty-two chapters and it hasn’t even mentioned a temple of any kind…  I think this book is a lost cause.”

Rainbow perked up from her sitting position.  She said with a tone of indignity, “You can’t just stop reading the book!  If you don’t keep reading, you’ll never know if she finds the treasure!”

Brain looked at her with an angry glare, “You said you just finished reading the book!  Why the hell am I sitting here reading it when you can just tell me what happens?!”

Doctor interjected before Rainbow could respond, “Because, I’ve taken quite a few notes on the path Daring has taken so far and checked them with the map of Everfree Forest you found earlier.  So far, everything described in the book checks out.  Distance, landmark, everything matches perfectly.”

Brain’s face flushed red, and he scratched his mane with his hoof.  He sheepishly said, “S-sorry for snapping like that Rainbow… I’m just a little on edge here…”

Rainbow shrugged her shoulders, “It’s okay.  I understand why you’d be upset.”

With a deep sigh, Brain picked the book back up.  He continued reading from where he left off, and all the ponies settled back to listen to the rest of the tale.

…

Chapter 23:  The Forgotten Temple

Daring stepped out of the makeshift tent she had built from the large leaves and twigs of the forest around her.  She greeted the sunlight with a smile, her eyes filled with a determination nopony could imagine.  She grabbed her bag of supplies and wrapped the strap around her.  She pulled her compass from the pouch, and regained her bearings.  She turned to face northward, and continued off in search of the mysterious temple she had seen from the mountains the previous day.

Through the thick vines and horrible stench of wild animals and insects, she pressed ever forward, determined to find the treasure hidden within this long-forgotten building.  The many legends she had read about Everfree Forest played back in her head as she continued her trot through the jungle.

The sun was high in the sky before Daring stopped to rest.  She pulled a flask from her pouch and took a small gulp of water as she sat on the ground.  She looked around the area she rested in, examining every tree and flower for any sign of something out of place.  As she packed her stuff up to continue her adventure, a shining object caught her eye.  It was wedged into the ground near a large wilted tree.

She took out a chisel and hammer from her pouch, carefully digging the object from the dirt.  Once she finally had it free from the ground’s hold, she dusted it off and examined it.  She could make out a word engraved on one side of it.  “Quetzalcoatl.” she read aloud.  It sounded familiar to her, but she knew she’d never seen the word before.  She placed the object in a special pocket on her pouch, and then continued on her way.  She pondered the meaning of the word.

For another hour, Daring proceeded through the jungle.  Just as she was about to stop and rest, she noticed the trees getting farther and farther apart as she moved along.  Excitement filling her mind and body, she picked up the pace as she hurriedly headed toward what she assumed was the edge of the tree line.

After what felt like an eternity of running, Daring Do emerged from the jungle into a massive, wide, open field.  The field was specked with tall two-legged figures moving around.  Some of them pushed stone blocks.  Others were chiseling the stone slabs into certain shapes.  Still others were just gathered in groups, doing what seemed like nothing.  But at the dead center of the field, Daring saw something that made her jaw drop and her knees shake.

All of these figures were gathered around a giant stone temple at the center of the field.  The temple reached at least two-thousand feet into the air.  A bright blue glow surrounded the top.  She watched as some figures walked into the glow and others came out.  Whatever touched the glow seemed to disappear for good.  Daring felt in her heart that some super-secret treasure had to be hidden inside the glow, so she set out in a mad dash toward it.

She spread her wings slightly, barely lifting up above ground-level.  The grayscale-rainbow trail that followed her letting the figures in the area know she was there…

“Finally we get a damn temple!”  Brain cheered in relief.  He felt as though the story was dragging it out until the last possible second.

Big Mac laughed, “So now we got two Princesses’ journals and a little filly’s story book telling us the temple exists.  Guess we gotta believe it now.”  He nudged Doctor in the side.

Doctor looked up from the notebook he had been scribbling notes down in.  “So, from the edge of the forest by the golden tree, we head eastward into the woods until we reach a massive waterfall with a green glow.  Then we head northwest until we reach a giant cavern.  We pass through there and we should head north until we come to a mountainous slope.  After crossing over the slope, we should come to a large stone tree.  From that tree, we head straight northward through the jungle until we reach a wide open plain with a temple at the center.”

The mares stared at Doctor in disbelief.  Rainbow Dash stated bluntly, “You sure do have a keen sense of direction, keeping your bearings like that.”

Twilight giggled, “That sounds almost perfect, Doctor.  How’d you do that?”

Doctor shrugged his shoulders, “Meh, it’s just one of my things.  I used to be a cartographer, so directions are kind of a hobby of mine.”

Big Mac slapped him on the back, “So uh…why’s your cutie mark an hourglass again?”

Doctor blushed as he laughed, “Well, I am the pony master of time and space.”  He looked over at Brain as he said this.

Apparently every other pony thought it was a funny joke.  Brain closed the book and placed it in his pouch.  He cleared his throat, and the laughter stopped in an instant.  “Well fellas, I think it’s time for us to start getting ready.  We have a long journey ahead of us.  We need supplies and preparations.”

Fluttershy asked, “You aren’t going to finish reading the book?”

Brain shrugged, “I don’t think I need to.  I have my directions to the temple.  The only thing that will come from the rest of this story will be entertainment.  If you don’t mind, however, I think I will borrow it, just in case.”  He winked at Twilight.

Doctor closed the notebook, placed it in Brain’s pouch, and stood up.  He stretched as he yawned, “I think we should head out first thing in the morning.  It’s starting to get a little late.”  He looked out the window to see the sun setting in the horizon.

Big Mac stood up, his expression changing to one of excitement, “Guess we oughta start gatherin’ our stuff.”  He started to head to the door, Doctor following close behind.  “Get yourself some sleep, Brain.  You’re gonna need it if we wanna do this thing.”

Doctor turned around and took a bow, “Goodnight, everypony.  Don’t let the bed bugs bite in your sleep.”  He walked out of the library.

Brain was left alone with the mares, his mind racing with thoughts of the jungle and the temple.  He couldn’t wait to get back home.  His stomach growled loudly as he realized he hadn’t eaten anything all day.

Fluttershy laughed, “Maybe you should get some food before you try to get some sleep.”

Brain picked up the map of Everfree Forest from the spot where Doctor had been sitting.  He rolled it up and placed it in the pouch.  “That might be a good idea.  I also need to find a place to crash tonight.”  He picked the pouch up and pulled the strap over his shoulder.

“Why don’t you just sleep over at my house tonight?  I mean, it is the closest building in town to the entrance of Everfree Forest.”  Fluttershy walked over to Brain’s side.

“I appreciate the offer, but I think I’ll sleep outside tonight.  I didn’t seem to have much problem doing it last night…”  He remembered waking up in the grass that morning, staring at Applejack.

Fluttershy exclaimed, “Nonsense!  You simply must get a good night’s rest if you’re going on a journey!”  She placed a hoof down in front of him.  He decided it was best not to argue with the pony.

“Okay, okay!  You win!  I’ll stay at your place.  But I still gotta get some food.  Is there any place in town that has…meat?  Or at least, something other than flowers?”  Brain blushed as his stomach growled again, this time louder than before.

“The café in the marketplace makes soy burgers.  Is that better?”  Twilight answered.

The first thought in Brain’s mind at the mention of soy burgers was the memory of how he would always eat them at school…  The thought made him sick, but not as much so as the thought of eating flowers.  “That’d be fine.  I’ll head over there and grab a bite, then head to your place and sleep.”  He looked at Fluttershy before he turned to walk away.

Walking through the door, he heard it slam shut behind him, and heard giggles coming from inside.  He raised an eyebrow in curiosity, until his stomach once more brought its emptiness to his attention.  “I hear you already!  Just stop growling!” he mumbled to the annoying organ.  He started off on his way to the café…

He sat in a booth inside the café, enjoying the music that was playing from the back.  Being the only customer in at the moment, his food was delivered almost immediately.  It smelled and looked delicious and- with a plethora of toppings and condiments to choose from- he loaded the burger down with all his favorite things.  Pickles, onions, tomatoes, lettuce, mayonnaise, ketchup…  He thought he was in heaven as he took the first bite.  Even though it was a soy burger, it was one of the best things he had eaten in forever.  Maybe that was due in part to his extreme hunger.

He sat in the booth for almost twenty minutes, savoring the burger.  Then the check came…  “That’ll be twenty bits for the whole meal.”  The owner of the café smiled at him.

“Twenty…bits…?  I’m afraid I don’t have any money!”  Brain’s face flushed red, his head beginning to sweat in nervousness.

The owner’s smile quickly faded.  “You…can’t pay?”  His left eyebrow twitched.

“Calm down, fella.  I’ll get his bill.”  A stallion walked into the café just as the owner was about to get mad.  The stallion had an orange mane and gray coat.  He had a smug look on his face as he poured the bits on the counter next to the cash register.  He walked over to Brain’s booth and took a seat on the other side of the table from him.

Brain raised a curious eyebrow.  He asked, “Thanks, but who exactly are you?”

The stallion shook his head, “You never were the brightest guy in the bar…”  Brain’s eyes jolted wide as these words left the stallion’s lips.  The stallion chuckled, “Why do you want to go home so bad, Brain?  Don’t you like it here?”

Brain’s hoof slammed on the table as he shouted, “Tell me who the hell you are!”

The stallion looked directly into Brain’s eyes, smiling as he whispered, “Why, it’s me, Chance.  Have you already forgotten your best friend’s face?”

Brain’s eyes brightened as the stallion spoke.  Now that he thought about it, the voice was very familiar.  And the face kind of resembled his friend’s.  “Uh-huh.  Chance isn’t that uncommon of a name.  And anyone who saw Mythol’s picture would know about a bar.  How can I be sure you’re 100-proof?”

The stallion sat back and laughed, “That was some night, wasn’t it?  You remember the fight Mitch got in to?  That dude fucked his eye up.”

Brain let out a deep breath, sat back in his seat, and relaxed.  He chuckled, “How the hell did you get here, Chance?”

The stallion sighed, “I’m not sure how I got here, but I don’t think I wanna leave.  I mean, think about it for a second.  Even when something bad happens around here, the problem’s almost always immediately resolved.  Besides, I love the show.  This world is pretty kickass.”  He looked at Brain with a serious glare.

Brain let his jaw drop.  “You can stay here all you want pal.  I’d like to get home and enjoy being a biped.  This pony anatomy stuff just ain’t my style.  ‘Everypony’, ‘hoof’, and ‘flank’ are not casual vocabulary words for me.”  He smiled as he watched his friend get up from the table.

Chance placed a hoof on his shoulder, “You know that even if you get back to our world, no one will ever believe you, right?”

“That’s why I won’t tell anyone.”

“And what about when everyone realizes we both went missing…and only you returned?  Don’t you think they may suspect you of killing me?”

“There won’t be any evidence.  They can’t convict me if there’s no proof…or crime.  Besides, I don’t go out very often anyway.  Me disappearing for a few days is perfectly normal.”

“True enough.  Well, if you ever find your temple thing, be sure to send a letter back with your friends.”  Chance took a few steps toward the door.

Brain smiled and cheered, “Thanks!  I’ll be sure to…  Wait a minute, how’d you know it was a temple?”  A look of confusion covered his face.

Chance turned back with a sly smile, “You didn’t think you were the only pony in town trying to find a way home, did you?  I don’t want to go back yet, but eventually I’ll get bored here.  Knowing there’s a way home is comforting.”  Without hesitating, Chance left the café.

Brain was left to ponder everything he had just heard.  Learning that he wasn’t the only human that ended up as a pony was a comforting thing.  At the same time, however, it continued to puzzle him how the both of them ended up in Ponyville.  Why wouldn’t Chance want to go home?  This place was good and all, but sometimes you need a little not-so-peaceful situation to liven things up.  Living in Equestria would be too boring for Brain.

He sighed, “I guess I’m just not that big on the whole ‘Love and Tolerance’ part of the Brony Code…”  He hopped out of his booth, thanked the owner for his service, and headed out of the door.  He let the cool evening air envelope him as he started the trot to Fluttershy’s house.  One thing he didn’t understand is why she insisted he stay at her place.  Of course, he didn’t dare question it.  Like Big Mac, he knew not to risk making a woman mad.

“Tomorrow’s gonna be a big day.  I’d best get some rest…”

Chapter 5: A Mule's Sleepless Night

Chapter 5: A Mule's Sleepless Night

Brain said he needed to get rest for the day ahead, but he really didn’t sleep at all.  Throughout the whole night, he tossed and turned on the small bed Fluttershy had laid out for him.  His mind continued to wander off into the distance, thinking about all the things they would have to do to reach the temple in the forest.  He was, of course, assuming the temple was real.

After reading the Daring Do book, he was mentally preparing himself for the hard physical labor of actually trekking through Everfree Forest.  Unable to sleep, he decided to get a preemptive strike on their early-morning preparations.  He lit the small lamp that sat beside his bed, and pulled out three maps from his pouch.

One map was of the current layout of Equestria.  The second map was the one he had found of Everfree Forest.  The final map was attached to the Daring Do book, and showed the character’s path through Everfree Forest, starting from the golden tree within Equestria’s borders.  Comparing the three maps side by side and on top of one another, he tried to pinpoint on the Everfree map exactly where the golden tree was.

Keeping in mind that Ponyville was the closest settlement to what would be the Everfree-Equestria border, he determined that the location of the golden tree in Daring Do’s book was none other than the center of the town itself.  That fact puzzled him to no extent, but he didn’t question the simplicity and convenience of its location.  Just as he was packing the maps back up, he heard Fluttershy step down the stairs.

She rubbed her eyes with her hooves, yawning, “Are you still awake?  You really should be asleep!”  She walked over to him.

Brain blushed upon seeing her.  Suddenly he thought of something that didn’t make sense to him.  Fluttershy was wearing some sort of night gown, but during the day nopony wore clothes, outside of special occasions.  Yet for some strange reason, in the back of his mind, Brain felt…dirty…seeing Fluttershy in a night gown.  He shook his head, trying to knock the thought out of his head.

“Hehe, I’m just a little excited for tomorrow, that’s all.  I couldn’t sleep…”  His voice trailed off as he tried to divert his gaze away from her.

She looked at him with a puzzled expression, “Is something wrong, Brain?  You seem nervous about something.”

Brain wanted to facehoof right there on the spot.  Was it really that obvious something was on his mind?  He tried to fight the thought that kept popping up in his head.  “N-no!  I’m fine!  I’m just wondering how this little adventure of mine will be ending…”  He blushed as he turned back toward her.

What the hell is wrong with me?!  Why the fuck are these thoughts popping up in my head?  I’m a human!  H-U-M-A-N!  Not a pony!  And she’s a cartoon character, anyway!  Calm down Brain.  You’re probably just a lot more tired than you think…  At any rate, you’ve gotta keep your mind clear.  Much more important things are waiting than a little- Dammit!  Stop thinking like that!

He chuckled, “I guess I really should be getting some sleep, eh?”  He scratched his head with his hoof, trying to look a little less bothered.

Fluttershy giggled, “So, you’ve spent one day as a pony.  How does it feel?”

He said bluntly, “Weird.  Like, really weird.  Imagine walking on four legs your whole life, then suddenly having to walk on two.  It’s really hard to get used to.”  He looked down at his hooves.

“So…You really think you’ll be able to find the temple?”  She sat on the bed beside him.

“I hope so…  I like it here, but I really want to go home.  See my real friends, eat real food, and sleep in my real bed…”  His face flushed red as he felt her warmth sit beside him.

She giggled, “What’s it like…in your world?”

He looked down at her.  He said softly, “Horrible.  Thieves, killers, and perverts run amok.  Our leaders are corrupt, and hardly give a shit about us.  The economy sucks, and jobs are pretty scarce…”  He saw her expression change.

She asked him, a somewhat pitying tone in her voice, “Why do you want to go back?  It sounds like a bad place…”

He shrugged his shoulders, “I’m not really sure.  I just do.  It’s my home.  It may be hell, but it’s my home.”

She smiled, “So…at the end of the day, everything’s worth it?”  She looked up into his eyes.

He thought long and hard about that question.  He sighed, “You know, sometimes it is, and other times it isn’t.  It just depends on how you handle what you’re given.”

“How would you compare Equestria with your world?”

“This place…is paradise.  I haven’t gotten into a single argument since I got here…  I haven’t seen a fight.  I haven’t so much as heard about a single crime.  Other than that monster from a month ago, that is.”  He looked down at her.  Her eyes looked sad.

She spoke softly, “He wasn’t a bad guy.  He was just…hurt.  In the end, his love for a pony saved his life…and Equestria’s.”  She giggled at the thought of the stallion.

“Hurt?  I knew a guy who was ‘hurt’.  He still killed a guy in cold blood.  You can’t excuse a crime.  If you kill a guy for killing your brother…or for stealing your food…it’s all the same.  A bad person is a bad person, no matter why they’re bad.”

Fluttershy jolted to her feet, “You can’t honestly mean that!  Anything can be forgiven; you just have to accept it!”

Brain laughed, “You wouldn’t understand.  It’s different in my world.  If you so much as look at a guy funny, he’s likely to blow your brains out with a bullet.  Living in Equestria is paradise compared to Earth.  You just wouldn’t understand my world.”

Fluttershy sat back down beside him, resting her head on the wall.  She sighed, “If your world is so horrible, why do you want to leave?  Why not start a new life here?  I mean, you talk about how bad it is.  Why not get away from it all?”

Brain shook his head, “I have friends back home.  I have family.  I have a job.  I’m just a writer on the side.  I actually work in an office, doing paperwork.  I have responsibilities.  I can’t just abandon my world and my life.”

“You could, if you wanted to.”  Fluttershy muttered.

Brain looked at her, unsure of just where she was going with all this interrogation.  He saw a glint in her eye, almost like a tear.

Dammit Brain, you’ve done it again!  You’re being too harsh.  There’s no reason to be so down and depressed about all this.  She’s just trying to be friendly.  Apologize for being so blunt!  Then ask her why she’s asking so many questions.  And then *GO THE FUCK TO SLEEP*!  It’s like two in the morning.  You’re going to be trekking through a forest in a few hours, and if you don’t sleep, you will regret the shit out of it!

“Fluttershy, I’m sorry for being so-!” Brain started to apologize, but it was just a little too late.  Fluttershy sat up in the bed and in one swift, smooth motion, planted a kiss right on Brain’s lips.  His face flushed a cherry-red color and nearly fell from the bed in shock.  Fluttershy’s face was just as red as his, if not redder.

She placed a hoof on his arm, and asked innocently, “You don’t really have to go home, do you?”

Brain’s first thought was to kiss her back.  Then he realized that he was a human at heart, not a pony.  It would just be weird.  In fact, this entire conversation and situation were weird.  He stuttered in response, “I-I’m sorry, F-Fluttershy…  B-but yes, I do…”  He sighed deeply, closing his eyes.

Fluttershy looked at him with a smile, “Well, at least I tried, right?”  She sat back in the bed, the way she had been before.  She sighed.

Brain, on the other hand, was still on the edge of the bed.  He stuttered, “T-tried what?  Wh-what are you talking about?”

She giggled, “I thought that maybe the only reason you wanted to go home is because you didn’t feel welcome.  I wanted to change your mind…”

He swallowed the lump in his throat, then stuttered, “B-but why would you do all this just to make me feel w-welcome?”

“Because I really like you, Brain.”  She batted her eyes at him.  The moonlight shining through the window made her blue eyes glow majestically.

Things just got twenty percent more awkward in ten seconds flat…  Jesus Christ, why the hell did I just think that?!  This world is really starting to get to me…  But Fluttershy is so pretty.  And she likes me!  I can’t even begin to imagine what she sees in me.  Maybe I should just ask her?  No, that would be dumb!  How the hell does someone handle a situation like this with a cartoon character?!

“I-I don’t know what to say to that…” he replied honestly.

She giggled, and this time it sent the butterflies in Brain’s stomach fluttering.  “Why don’t you just sit back and say ‘Okay’?”

Brain thought about this for a second, “You don’t usually reply ‘Okay’ when someone tells you they like you…”

She smiled seductively, “No, but that’s what you should say when I ask you if I can lie here with you for the rest of the night.”

Brain gazed at her for a moment, and then simply said, “O-okay…”

He sat back in the bed, stretched out in a comfortable fashion.  Fluttershy lay down beside him, her head resting on his shoulder.  She closed her eyes and breathed calmly.  He wrapped his arm around her, hugging her to him.

She whispered to him, “This is nice…”

He replied sheepishly, “Yeah, it really is…”

Brain my boy, what the hell have you gotten yourself into?

Chapter 6: In A Mule's Company

Chapter 6: In A Mule's Company

Brain awoke to a loud banging on the door of the house.  He tried to ignore it and nod back off to sleep, but the sound persisted for about a minute.  He stretched and yawned, rolling out of the bed onto his hooves.  He looked back at the bed to find Fluttershy was not there.  He assumed she had woken up earlier and left, explaining why she hadn’t answered the door.

He walked over to the door and opened it, and was immediately greeted with what one can only describe as an otaku-glomp from an overly-excited Pinkie Pie.  Her friends followed her into the house, carefully stepping around the stallion now sprawled out on the floor.  He rubbed his head in confusion, and then looked outside to see the sun rising in the sky.  It couldn’t have been later than six in the morning.

“Well, that’s definitely one way to wake up…” he muttered in irritation.

Pinkie bounced around the room.  “Well, you should be awake anyway!  Doctor Whooves and Big Mac are on their way!”

Brain’s eyes jolted open, suddenly remembering their agreement to set out on their quest this morning.  He walked over to his bed, picked up his pouch, and strapped it over his shoulder.  He yawned, “I can’t say I slept at all last night…  Doesn’t feel like it, anyway…”  Suddenly, the entire group of ponies shot him a funny smile and stifled laughter.

Applejack said, “Well no matter how much sleep you got, y’all are headin’ out this morning, right?  You oughta get you some food before it’s time to leave.”

Brain felt like the subject of a really bad joke.  He couldn’t place his finger on it, but for some reason he felt as if he was being left out of some really important loop.  He decided to cast the feeling off as paranoia, and decided it best to focus on the present in front of him.

He sighed, “I think food is the last thing on my mind right now.”

Twilight laughed, “Yeah, well you might eat those words in a few hours!”

Brain laughed at her pun, whereas the other ponies didn’t even seem to notice it.  “Uh…you guys didn’t catch that?  She said I ‘might eat those words’.  It’s a pun!”  He sighed, bowing his head in disappointment as none of the other ponies got the pun.

This place will be the death of me.  Where the hell are Big Mac and Doctor?  The sooner I get out of this place, the better.  I can’t let myself get dragged into any more random crap while I’m here.  I have to stay focused and keep my thoughts on getting to that damned temple…  I have to get home.

“So, at any rate, why are all you ponies awake so early?”  He raised an eyebrow, trying to cast aside the pun business.

Rarity said simply, “We just couldn’t let you three leave without saying goodbye first.  Besides, there’s a good chance we won’t see any of you again.”

Rainbow Dash gave Rarity a slight shove in irritation.  Those were definitely not words of encouragement.  “I think she meant to say that we may not see you again.  Big Mac and Doctor will definitely be back, right Rarity?”

Rarity blushed, turning her head away as if to avoid the question.  “Right, of course that’s what I meant.”

Brain couldn’t hold back a laugh, “Your faith in our endeavor is astounding, Rarity.  I feel much better knowing you believe in us!”

Suddenly there was a knocking at the door.  Twilight opened it with her magic, and in walked Big Mac and Doctor, suited up and ready to go.  Of course, by ‘suited up’, I meant they had pouches on just like Brain.  They both carried different essentials.  Doctor was carrying rope, among a plethora of other tools they may need on their journey.  Big Mac was loaded down with non-spoilable foods and drinks.

Brain opened his pouch and pulled the Everfree Forest map from it.  He handed it to Doctor.  “Since you used to be a cartographer, I’ll let you handle the map.  I took the liberty of marking exactly where the golden tree mentioned in the book is.”

Doctor studied the map carefully.  “So…the golden tree was here in Ponyville at some point in time?”  He turned the map every which way, but the mark didn’t move.

“Trust me, it’s accurate.  I don’t make maps for a living, but I know how to read them.  Based off of a modern map, and the map at the back of the book, that mark is pretty damn accurate.”  Brain had a smug smile on his face.  Doctor rolled the map up, and placed it in his pouch.

Big Mac laughed, “I guess you’re on the ball, this mornin’.  We oughta get going.  We need to at least reach the waterfall before it gets too late.”

“Still going through with this, Brain?”  A voice called from the other side of the doorway.  Everypony’s head snapped in its direction, a shiver running down their spines.

Brain turned to look at the familiar voice.  “You bet your ass I am!  I’m going home, with or without you.”  He smile as Chance walked into the doorway, showing himself to the other ponies.

Big Mac stamped his hoof, “Uh…Brain, who’s this fella?”

Chance chuckled, “The name’s Chance.  I’m a friend of Brain’s.  You know, a human friend.”  The crowd of ponies gasped in shock as he stressed the word ‘human’.

Brain sighed, “Yep.  My best friend.  And a complete and total asshole.”  He placed a hoof on Chance’s shoulder, smiling widely.

Chance shrugged, “I am who I am.  And I am a human.  I’m coming with you guys.”  Brain’s hoof dropped upon hearing this.

“What about last night?  You told me ‘I don’t think I wanna leave.’  What happened to that?”  Brain almost seemed upset.

Chance stamped his hoof, “As much as I love the peace and quiet, sometimes it just gets boring.  I mean, I honestly don’t think anything interesting happened yesterday…  I’d go crazy from boredom.”

Brain sighed, “You never can make up your mind, you mule!”

Chance glanced at the duo of stallions.  “You don’t mind another set of hooves tagging along, do you?”

Big Mac and Doctor exchanged uneasy looks.  Big Mac replied, “Nope.  A friend of Brain’s is always welcome.”

Doctor, on the other hand, seemed a bit apprehensive.  “Just don’t try anything funny.”

Brain laughed, “Oh, the worst this guy’ll do is push you off a cliff into a bottomless pit.”  He slapped Chance on the back.  “Don’t worry fellas; he’s not a bad guy.”

Chance chuckled, “Thank you, Brain.  Reassuring, I’m sure.”

Stepping out into the bright morning sun of Equestria, the quartet of stallions decided it best to set out on their journey as soon as possible.  The group said their goodbyes to everyone, and started their trek into Everfree Forest….

…………

With a glint in his eye, Chance stared into the water of Ponyville’s fountain.  He smiled to himself as he thought about the temple that supposedly housed his way home.  He had done his own research into the subject.  According to the texts he read, the temple’s glowing aura grew smaller and weaker every time another human exited through it back to their world.  To him, this meant that if it did exist, the aura would be weak.  There was no guarantee how much the aura diminished in the thousands of years it had been open.

He decided then and there that if it came down to it, and the aura was open, he would be the first to pass through.  Brain could stay stuck in Equestria forever, for all he cared.  With a pouch full of food, drinks, and tools at his side, he started his trot to Fluttershy’s house.  He was going to go with the trio of stallions on their adventure to the temple.  And when the time came, he would forsake his friend for freedom back home.  He was fully prepared to abandon Brain on this side.

“Chance, my dear, you are an asshole.  I like it…” he muttered to himself in a calm, loving voice.

“Let’s start this little adventure, shall we?”

Chapter 7: The Mule's Watering Hole

Chapter 7: The Mule's Watering Hole

The quartet of stallions set out into the forest, beginning the journey that would lead them through swamp, mountain, cavern, and plain.  If everything they had read held true to this day, they would soon find themselves thrust into an amazing adventure full of danger and mystery.  To each of the four, something inside them pulled them ever forward through the forest.

For the first stretch of the forest both Big Mac and Doctor knew their ways around.  This first small area was a common trotting ground for all the citizens of Ponyville.  Not many dangerous animals roamed the edge of the woods, aside from an occasional cockatrice or two.  This was the part of the forest where Zecora, the witch-doctor-esque zebra, made her home.  Travelling through this section of the forest was easy and comforting for the two veteran stallions.  Almost nothing caught them off guard or surprised them.

It was a completely different story for Brain and Chance.  Although trying to appear tough and impervious to the eerie sights and sounds of the oddly dark forest, neither of the human-ponies were actually steady.  Their breathing shifted faster and slower, depending on how long it took for another creature to make a sound.  They didn’t know what to expect from the dark embrace of the forest.  All they knew was that they could not risk getting left behind by the stallions that trotted ever so casually in front of them.

Big Mac and Doctor stopped suddenly, raising their hooves as if telling the human-ponies to stay back.  Trying to gaze around Big Mac, Brain craned his neck.  In front of the group, in the middle of the road, a huge snake was curled into a large pile of green and brown.  The snake was at least three feet around, and roughly fifteen feet long.  A massive, heavy snake.  Big Mac stepped back a little ways, Doctor following him slowly.

Big Mac spoke quietly, “I don’t think we oughta risk wakin’ the thing.”

Doctor nodded in agreement, “I’m not ready to be snake food just yet.  We should try and go around through the trees.”  He pulled a compass from his pouch, making sure they were headed in the right direction.  They were headed due east, straight to their destination.

Chance laughed at the stallions, “Oh come on, are you really scared of a snake?  Isn’t that what they made daggers for?”  He pulled a large knife from his pouch.  The blade was roughly three inches long, and the hilt was solid steel.

Brain looked at the knife in confusion.  “I thought you pawned that old thing?”

Chance scoffed, “Hell no!  I knew this thing would come in handy one day!”  He slid his hoof to the tip of the hilt, shifting its weight in his hoof.  He tossed it in the air, catching it by the tip of the blade as it came back down.  He flicked his wrist a few times, and on the third flick, sent the knife flying right at the snake.

Big Mac and Doctor both leaped to the side, certain that the knife would only make the snake mad.  To their surprise, they watched as the knife penetrated right into the snake’s head.  It convulsed wildly once, then sprawled itself straight out.  With a single wicked hiss, it stopped moving, plopping to the ground with a thud.  Chance walked right up to it and ripped his knife from its head.  He wiped the blade on the grass, and then stuck the knife back in its cover.

He turned to smile at the trio of stunned stallions.  “See, I told you that’s what knives were for!”  He turned back to face the road.  “Let’s go fellas.  We have a long ways to go before we get to the waterfall.”

Doctor and Big Mac exchanged concerned looks, but Brain just casually walked up beside Chance.  The two of them started walking down the road.  Both letting out sighs, the two stallions decided it best to keep up.

The trek from that point on was pretty bland and boring for the most part.  The group passed by tree after tree, all of which were either covered in buzzing insects or prickly leaves.  The farther the group travelled, the greener everything seemed to get.  The tree bark developed a green tint, the leaves became a fluorescent color, and the sunlight itself seemed to take on a green shade.

It wasn’t long before the group emerged from the tree line to find themselves staring at a massive waterfall, nearly a quarter mile wide, flowing quickly and roaring loudly.  The water had an emerald-like color to it.  The group decided it would be best to rest on this side of the waterfall.  They laid out some of their supplies, including packages of food and a few flasks of water.  They sat in the moist grass and proceeded to eat and relax.

The sun was high in the sky, and Brain figured it was noon already.  It took them five hours to reach the waterfall from town.  It was weird, however, that it felt like barely an hour had passed since they left Fluttershy’s house.  After he had finished a single pack of food, Brain kicked back in the grass and stared at the green-tinged sky.  He let his mind wander while Big Mac and Chance talked.

Big Mac took a bite from a sandwich he had packed.  He looked at Chance with an expression of suspicion.  “So…you got any idea how you ended up here?”

Chance shrugged his shoulders, “No clue.  I remember walking into Brain’s house the night before last, and some green light flashing.  Next thing I know, I’m waking up half submerged in the Ponyville fountain.”

Brain sat upright to listen to Chance talk.  “How the hell’d you get in my house?”

Chance pulled a key from his pouch, “You gave me a key, remember?  For when you went out of town to PAX East.”  He shook his head.

“Oh yeah…So why were you coming over, anyway?” Brain continued.

“Because I wanted to make sure you didn’t pass out in the middle of your living room again.  You were pretty drunk by the time we made it to Wal-Mart.”  Chance chuckled.

Brain muttered, “You always have my back, huh?”

Doctor interrupted their conversation with a scream.  “Um, I hate to interrupt such sweet memories, but we have a problem!”

The other three stallions jolted their heads in the direction of Doctor’s voice.  Towering right over his head was a massive spider, almost the size of Fluttershy’s house.  It was spewing a web from its mouth, covering Doctor and holding him in place.  Brain jumped at the sight of the spider.  He couldn’t stand spiders…

A smile covered Chance’s face as he ripped his knife from its cover.  He leaped from the spot he was sitting and darted over toward the spider and its web.  Doctor was now almost completely covered in web.  With a wild growl, Chance pushed himself off of the ground with all his strength, the knife held firmly in his teeth.  In the middle of the air, Chance took the knife’s hilt in his hoof and thrust toward the spider.

Like something from a kung-fu movie, the thrust propelled Chance forward, right into the spiders head.  The knife tore straight through its head, causing it to flail wildly before collapsing to the ground, dead.  Chance pulled the knife from the spider’s head, flinging the blood off of it.  He hopped down the leg of the spider, stopping right beside Doctor.  In one swift motion he sliced the web open like a leather sack, Doctor squeezing out of the web with minimal effort.

Brain looked on in amazement as he watched his best friend perform these amazing tricks.  He had never known Chance to take any form of martial arts or do any sort of weapons training, so this came as a total surprise to him.  He was caught completely off guard by the hoof suddenly appearing in his face.

“C’mon Brain, can’t I get a bro-hoof for that?”  Chance laughed wildly.

“S-sure thing, dude!”  Brain placed his hoof to Chance’s.  He sighed as his body finally relaxed, seeing the spider was dead.

Doctor coughed up a wad of white gunk.  “I’ll tell you right now, if another spider tries to have me for a midday snack, I’m out of here!”

Big Mac slapped a hoof to Doctor’s back.  He chuckled, “It’s alright buddy!  As long as we got this ninja stallion on our side, we oughta be alright.”

Chance put the knife back in its cover.  He took a bow as he said, “Thank you, thank you!  I’ll be here all week!”  He grinned excitedly.

“Where’d you learn all those cool moves, Chance?”  Brain asked, his thoughts finally settling down.

Chance shrugged, “It’s cartoon logic, Brain.  Not a single bit of experience with martial arts, and you can still do ninja flips.  I don’t make the laws, they just happen.”

Brain laughed at that.  “True enough, my friend!  I can’t argue with you there!”

Big Mac and Doctor shared confused looks.  Doctor pulled the map from his pouch and asked bluntly, “So, how are we going to cross this waterfall?”

Chance immediately responded, “We tie ourselves in a chain with some rope.  We get as far upstream as these cliffs will let us, and cross over in simple, short, rock-to-rock bursts.”  He waved at the rocks that sprung up from the river.  He thought they could be used as a means of keeping the current from pulling them downstream.

“Well then,” Big Mac started, “I oughta go first.  Then Chance, followed by Brain, and Doctor can bring up the rear.”

Doctor looked at Big Mac incredulously.  “Why exactly must I bring up the rear?  I’m plenty stronger than Brain!  …No offense to you…”  He looked at Brain with a sympathetic expression.

“You’ve obviously never seen him drunk.  Dude becomes an ox.”  Chance scoffed.

Brain laughed, “I actually agree with Doctor here.  I’m not too used to this body yet, and I don’t feel confident enough to support the pony behind me.”

Big Mac sighed, “Alright then.  Brain will bring up the rear, with Doctor in front of him.  Now, do we got a rope?”

Both Doctor and Chance smiled as they pulled long cuts of rope from their pouches.  Doctor’s rope was cut shorter and thicker, whereas Chance’s rope looked flimsy and long.

Brain said bluntly, “This situation calls for strength more so than distance.  We’ll use Doctor’s rope, but hold on to yours just in case, Chance.”  He stood up, taking Doctor’s rope from him.

He went to each stallion individually, tying the rope tightly around their stomachs.  After the other three were secure, Big Mac tied the rope around Brain.  The group of stallions started their trek through the raging waters.  The water wasn’t too awfully deep, and it was easy to keep balance near the rocks that covered the expanse.  Before long, the quartet was on the other side.

Brain sighed as he undid the other stallions’ ropes, “Well, we made it.  Now we just have to find the cave.”  Without wasting any time, the group set out for their next landmark…

Chapter 8: One Mule's Playpen

Chapter 8: One Mule's Playpen

Soaked from head to hoof, our group set off on its way to the next landmark on the map.  There were heading towards a massive cavern northwest of the waterfall, exactly as it was portrayed on their maps.  If they were lucky, they would make it to the other side of the cavern before nightfall and set their camp for the night.  Of course, when was Lady Luck ever on the poor man’s side?

They continued their trek across the huge cliff at the head of the waterfall, carefully avoiding the edges, wary of loose rocks and giant insects.  Doctor would never forget how he almost became a spider’s lunch.  He also didn’t expect Big Mac to let him live it down.  Nevertheless, the quartet marched onward, expecting the worst but hoping for the best.

After about half an hour of trekking on the other side of the waterfall, the group decided to stop and rest.  They were still soaked, and the weight of the water on their coats and pouches burdened them.  They stopped and pulled their belongings from the pouches, allowing them to dry.  Amazingly, the maps and books had all gone completely unaffected.

Chance was wringing his pouch dry when Doctor noticed something odd behind him.  “Chance, look out!”  Doctor leaped from his spot on the ground, starting a dash toward Chance.

But it was just a bit too late, and a massive bird latched its claws onto Chance’s body, lifting him into the air.  Chance squirmed and shouted, “Let go of me you damn bird!  Yo Brain, mind giving me a hand?!”  He pointed a hoof at the knife lying beside his pouch.

Brain took off in a dead run to the knife, snatching it up from the ground and pulling it from its cover.  Without a second thought, he launched the knife at the bird, catching the tip of one of its wings.  In pain, the bird dropped Chance and took off in a nosedive toward the attacker.  Brain leaped out of the way as the bird drew closer, and it crashed headfirst into the cliff face.  Rocks began to crumble over on top of the bird, and it screeched one loud, dying screech.

Doctor and Big Mac were the first on the scene, checking to ensure the bird was dead.  Once they diagnosed that it was, they headed over to Brain and Chance.

Chance laughed, “Ha ha!  Not very often you get caught by a giant bird!  Nice job dodging, buddy.”

Brain chuckled, rubbing his scraped arm, “Yeah.  I didn’t feel like being suicide bombed.”  He looked over at the bird.

Doctor sighed, “That’s twice today one of us nearly became lunch.  Did you see anything while you were up there?”

Chance shook his head, “No.  And that’s the problem.  The cliff ends in about one-hundred yards.  We’ve reached a dead end…”

Doctor and Brain both dropped their jaws in disbelief.  “You can’t be serious!” they both exclaimed.

“Eeyup, it’s a dead end alright.  O’ course, that’s if ya don’t count this here cave that bird made for us.”  Big Mac called from the collapsed rock pile.  In front of the pile was a deep, dark, eerie opening.  Big Mac’s voice echoed inside the cave for a moment before fading away.

“Who would’ve thunk it…?  That bird suicide bombed our way into the cavern!”  Doctor exclaimed in utter disbelief.  Between the giant spider, Chance’s ninja moves, and the giant bird helping them, he didn’t think things could get weirder.

Brain snapped Doctor back to reality.  “Let’s go everyone.  The sooner we get through this cave, the better we’ll be.”  Brain started walking into the cave’s entrance, when Chance stopped him.

He held out a hoof to stop Brain from continuing.  “Hey genius, we’re about to go into an extremely dark, dank, probably insect and bat infested cave.  Don’t you think we might need a torch?”

Brain hadn’t actually thought about a torch.  If one of them was a unicorn, he could simply use magic to light the way.  But, again, Lady Luck and poor men…  “Do we have anything we can make a torch from?” he asked irritably.

The stallions looked at one another before nodding in agreement.  “Nope.” they all said in unison.

Brain sighed, “Well then, what the hell do we do?”

Chance opened his pouch before strapping it on himself.  He pulled out a small round object.  “Well, I do have this bad boy, if it still works.”

Upon seeing the object, Doctor began rooting around in his own pouch, pulling out a similar object.  “As do I, Chance.”

The two looked at each other with pride.  “Guess we’re ready for the worst, eh?” they laughed in unison.

Brain recognized the objects in their hands.  “Flashlights?  You guys really are prepared for the worst…”

Big Mac laughed, “Then I guess we’re ready to head in, right?”  He strapped his pouch back around him, Brain doing the same.

“I’ll take point.  In case we get split up, let’s try and stay in groups.  Doctor and Big Mac, myself and Brain.”  Chance stepped up into the entrance to the cave, turning his flashlight on.  To his surprise, it still worked, even after being bathed in water.

“Sounds good to me.”  Brain stepped up behind Chance, Doctor and Big Mac following suit.

“Let’s go.”  Chance took a few steps forward, before something bad happened…

Not even a foot inside the entrance, the cave turned into an extremely steep slope.  Not prepared for this slope, Chance immediately lost his footing, and tossed his flashlight into the air.  Brain caught it as he watched Chance slide down the slope, screaming all the way down.  Brain jumped in after him.

“Hold on Chance, I’m coming!”  He shouted as he leaped into the cave.

Big Mac and Doctor shared a look of concern, and nodded in agreement.  They stepped carefully into the cave, gently sliding down the slope.  Doctor held the flashlight in front of them.  They heard Chance’s continuous screaming as he continued to fall.  They could hear the echo of the rocks still coming loose.  Whatever this cave led to, it hadn’t been used in ages.

Finally, after about five minutes, Chance’s screaming was replaced with a loud thud.  Brain’s voice called out, “Try and make an easy landing, fellas!  It’s kind of a long fall!”

Another few minutes passed before the duo found themselves falling straight down.  They landed on top of the collapsed stallion below them.  Brain greeted them with a laugh and a light.  “So much for being careful, eh?”

An angry grunt came from below the stallions.  “Excuse me, but I am not a pillow!”  Chance screamed.  Doctor and Big Mac immediately hopped off of him.

Doctor took it upon himself to scout out a little ways down the tunnel while the other three were laughing about what had just happened.  When he returned to the group, he had great news to report.

“Give it to me straight, Doctor…  Are we gonna make it?”  Brain quoted an overly-used movie cliché.  Chance facehooved.

Doctor smiled as he said, “Just a little ways down this tunnel is the exit!  I don’t know if we went the right way, but that steep slope carried us all the way through the cave!”

The other three stallions cheered, following Doctor through the tunnel to the exit he had found.  They emerged into the light of the setting sun.  Brain couldn’t believe they had actually spent that long in the cave.  It honestly didn’t feel like that long.  Off in the distance, Chance spotted something that he couldn’t ignore.

“Brain!  Look over there!”  He placed one hoof on Brain’s shoulder, and pointed the other into the distance.  It didn’t take long for Brain to spot the attraction.

Off in the distance, seemingly just a few miles away, a blue glow emanated from the top of a giant stone figure.  Not even a day’s worth of adventuring, and they could already see the temple from the texts.  Brain and Chance looked at each other with excited grins.  They leaped into the air, cheering wildly.  They hugged each other as if they hadn’t seen each other in years.  They rested a single arm upon each other, staring at the majestic blue glow of the temple.

Big Mac and Doctor left the two to their own devices.  They set up a makeshift camp, putting up two tents and gathering some sticks and twigs to build a fire with.  In the distance they could hear the faint roar of the waterfall.  They shared a look of smugness before lighting the fire and pulling out some food packages from their pouches.

After minutes of staring at the glow, Brain and Chance snapped back to reality.  They plopped down on the solid rock, gathered close to the fire, as they opened their own packages of food.  The group sat in silence, enjoying their food and watching the fire burn.  The faint roar of the waterfall, mixed with the glow of the temple, comforted Brain and Chance beyond all comparison.  But deep down in his heart, Brain started feeling emptiness.  He tried to cast it off, but it wouldn’t go away…

As the sun slowly set in the western sky, the group decided it best to get an early rest.  They climbed into their tents and quickly passed out.  They dreamed of the rest of the journey to the temple.  They dreamed of just what exactly waited for them at the strange blue glow.

Chance dreamed about how he would get Brain out of the picture should the time come.

Brain dreamed about the emptiness inside of him, and what could have been causing it.

Doctor dreamed about the stories he would be able to tell.

Big Mac dreamed about how Mythol would repay him for helping to find the temple.

A voice echoed in the air.  It spoke quietly, softly, and eerily.

To he who would seek the portal to the other world…Turn back now.  No good awaits you in the temple.  Only pain and suffering and jealousy.  Turn back now…

Chapter 9: Of Mules and Magic

Chapter 9: Of Mules and Magic

Two days prior to the events of the last few chapters, the day before Brain and Chance ended up in Equestria, the ponies Brain referred to as ‘The Mane Six’ were gathered at Zecora’s house, helping her to gather ingredients for a potion she was working on.  They sat around after a long day of foraging for ingredients and talked about random topics that came to them.

Zecora was curious about the whole story of the monster that had attacked a month prior to this meeting.  Although she had been affected by it, she still didn’t quite understand exactly what happened.  The ponies excitedly told the story of the monster, and how Fluttershy’s bravery helped restore their senses.

They told her about how the monster’s love for a friend he knew long ago helped bring him back to his senses and ended the madness he had caused.  Everypony took their turns explaining their feelings on the whole endeavor.  Some were happy, others were confused.  Fluttershy, on the other hand, had different feelings for the situation.

Eventually the topic drew away from the monster and on to Twilight Sparkle’s brother, Shining Armor, and his wedding that had taken place two months ago.  Everypony happily relayed the disaster that had happened in Canterlot on the day of the wedding, being sure to stress just exactly how much love Princess Cadence and Armor had for one another.  Twilight laughed as the topic brought up the memory of a letter her brother had sent her.

Twilight giggled, “You know, I received a letter from Shining Armor a few days ago.  He told me all about how loving Princess Cadence was, and how wonderful of a wife she was.”

Fluttershy smiled, “Well it’s good that they’re happy together.”

The other ponies in the hut nodded in agreement.  Twilight continued, “He was also telling me about how he feels smothered at times.  She hardly ever leaves him alone, unless he’s at the guards’ watchtower.  He stressed the fact that she’s nothing but loving, but he still feels a bit smothered by her always being around.”

The other ponies looked at each other.  Rainbow Dash shrugged her shoulders, “Yeah, I can understand that.  It’s nice to get away from certain people at times.”

Applejack chuckled, “Yep, I get what he means.  Sometimes you just gotta get away.”

The mares nodded in agreement, laughing to themselves.  Fluttershy sighed, “I don’t know.  I think it’d be nice to have a gentle, kind stallion that would care for me.  Maybe he could even like animals!”  She smiled.

Rainbow Dash scoffed, “Ha!  You can forget about finding a stallion like that here in Ponyville.”

Rarity added, “None of the would-be mules in this town are worth any self-respecting mare’s company.”

Fluttershy muttered, “It would still be nice…”

Zecora laughed, standing over by a pot of boiling water.  As she placed the day’s ingredients into the pot, she said, “A stallion like that you will find in Ponyville, maybe not.  But such a wonderful dream should not be forgot!”

The ponies looked at her with confused looks.  She simply smiled at them, dropping the last ingredient into the pot.  With a wave of her hoof, steam poured from the pot.  “Ah, the first day’s mixing has been finished.  Farewell to you all, and to see you tomorrow is wished.”  She waved at the door to the hut.

The ponies knew it was best to leave when Zecora said so.  The last time they didn’t, they ended up with some strange after-effects of the aroma that soon filled the hut with each potion she made.  After the ponies had gone on their way down the road back to town, Zecora closed the door and pulled the blinds over the windows.

She pushed the pot of unidentifiable potion to the side of the room, placing an empty pot in its place.  She filled the pot with water, adding a few random ingredients here and there.  She pulled a book of potion recipes from the shelf behind her, and flipped wildly through the pages.  She stopped on one particular recipe.  It was an old recipe, its last known use dating back over five-thousand years.

“For a gentle, kind stallion that will care… Such a wish should not be left in the air.”  As she said this, she added a small lock of pink hair into the water.  The water inside the pot turned a neon-pink color, and images began appearing in the pot.  Zecora watched as random images of strange creatures flashed briefly before fading.  After a few minutes, the images stopped flashing.

The picture displayed was of a strange male creature sleeping, hunched over in a chair, his head lying on some sort of notebook.  He had a small rectangular object beside him and weird things shoved in his ears.  Zecora waited for the picture to change, but raised an eyebrow when it didn’t.  She heard what she assumed was the creature’s voice speaking softly.

“C’mon shooting star, I just need a little muse!  Give me something to work with here!” the voice called.

Zecora let a smile cover her face.  “For a muse he has wished and his heart, it does click.  From his world I will now fish, as per Fluttershy’s pick.”  She poured a small satchel of seeds into the pot, and it flashed bright green one time.  When the light faded, the creature was no longer sitting in the chair asleep.  Instead, all that remained was the small rectangular object and the things that were once in its ears.

“As of tomorrow’s rising moon, that stallion shall make her heart swoon.”  Zecora chuckled slyly as she placed a single red apple into the mixture.  She took a cup from her cupboard and dipped it into the pot.  She gulped down a whole cup of the strange potion.  She cringed at the bitter taste.  “A bitter taste is what I need…This spell will surely succeed.”

With that, Zecora covered the pot with a large iron lid and sat on her bed.  She laid back, a smile on her face.  She thought about what she had just done.  Sure, there could be repercussions in the creature’s world, but at least her friend would be happy.  Perhaps it wouldn’t be too hard for the creature to adjust to his new life.  She decided she would make a potion, just in case he couldn’t adjust on his own.

She closed her eyes, deciding she would wake up extra early to get started on it.  She wanted to have it finished before her friends arrived to look for more ingredients to the other potion.

At the first signs of sunlight, Zecora jolted awake.  She lifted the lid from the pot of liquid, and then looked once more at her recipe book.  It didn’t take long for her to find the recipe for her next potion.  Building on from the potion she made the night before, all she needed was to add a few fruits and vegetables to the mix to bring about a balanced sweet-sour taste.  Once the taste was reached, the potion was ready.  All Zecora would need is for one of the two ponies to drink the potion.

At around noon, the potion was ready and cooled.  She filled six cups with the potion.  For five of her intended consumers, the potion would simply be a sweet treat to wake them up.  For Fluttershy, however, the potion would fill her heart with a yearning for a stallion.  It would be a stallion she knew, but she wouldn’t know who she liked…  Not until the night’s moon lifted into the sky.

The day played out just fine, on Zecora’s part.  Her friends arrived, and they happily drank the concoction.  Fluttershy immediately felt the effects, but she decided not to say anything.  She felt a strange feeling of love inside of her…but she didn’t know who it was for.  After a day of scavenging for ingredients and helping Zecora make her potion, the ponies decided to head back to town.

Zecora caught Fluttershy before she could leave.  “Dear Fluttershy, is it true what I’ve been told?  Is there a new stallion in town, one that is not too old?”

Fluttershy happily said, “Yeah, there sure is!  His name is Brain.  For a full-grown stallion, he sure does seem a bit…uncoordinated.”

Zecora smiled, “I’ve also heard that he is searching for his way home…  Maybe you should invite him into your own.”

Fluttershy blushed at the mention of it, “Why would I do that?”

“Because, silly pony, perhaps he is very lonely…”  Zecora turned her head to the side, avoiding Fluttershy’s gaze.

“I guess it would be polite.  Maybe if he feels welcome around here he won’t be so homesick?”  Fluttershy thought about it for a minute, and then nodded her head.  She turned to leave the hut and catch up to her friends.

Zecora’s eyes glistened in the sunlight.  She mumbled to herself, “Your hearts, minds, and souls simply clicked, so from his world he was picked…”  She headed back into the hut, proud of her handiwork.  As soon as the moon settled high in the sky, the potion would take a hold of both Brain and Fluttershy.

The only problem was, Brain’s ambition to get home might make him immune to the potion’s effects.  It wouldn’t be until he reached his destination that he would realize his feelings for Fluttershy.  Even so, he would definitely feel them.  The sooner he found his way home, the sooner he would return to her side.

……

It was nearly two in the morning when Fluttershy felt a strong tugging in her chest.  It was as if her heart was telling her to go somewhere.  She rolled out of her bed and headed downstairs to see if Brain was awake.  She had a horrible urge to talk to him.

As the two talked to one another, a strange feeling grew inside of her.  For some reason she couldn’t understand, she felt a longing to be with him.  Before long, the feeling was too much for her.  Cutting Brain off in the middle of a sentence, she leaped up and planted kiss right on his lips.

The two lay together the rest of the night in one another’s warm embrace.

……

Zecora smiled as she the pot of potion bubbled eagerly beside her.  She knew that it had taken its hold on both of the intended targets.  The moment Brain found his answer he would begin feeling the urge to be with Fluttershy.  And the farther the two separated, the stronger Fluttershy’s feelings would become.

“You are either a love-building queen, or a heart-breaking demon, so it would seem.”  Zecora sighed to herself as a smile stretched across her face.  The potion would either ensure neither of its targets could be happy alone, or that they would be happy together forever.

……

The moon in the sky complimented the blue glow emanating from the temple in the distance.  Brain sighed as he pondered the empty feeling in his gut.

Chapter 10: A Mule's Stone Comfort

Chapter 10: A Mule's Stone Comfort

Brain watched as the sun rose in the eastern sky.  The blue glow from the temple calmed his mind and eased the emptiness in him.  The sound of the waterfall in the distance filled his ears with a comforting sound.  It wasn’t long before he heard rustling coming from the tents behind him.  He greeted his friends with a smile as they climbed from their beds.

Stretching and yawning, the other three stallions returned his smile with hungry grunts.  It seemed that the fatigue from yesterday’s adventure had finally caught up to them while they were sleeping.  Brain felt tired, but the feeling in his gut refused to let him sleep.  He laughed as his stomach growled loudly.

The group began their breakfast immediately, waking up enough to make conversation.  Brain asked, “How long do you figure it’ll take us to get to the temple?”

Chance groaned, “We should be there by nightfall.  Assuming nothing bad happens.”

Doctor lazily chuckled, “You mean like giant spiders and birds eating us?”

Big Mac sighed, “We oughta get ready for our trip.  We gotta get to that forest down there, right?”

Brain and Chance walked over to the edge of the cliff, peering down below them.  They noticed a huge expanse of forest, the center of which was gray and lifeless.  They exchanged confused looks.  They had been so mesmerized by the glow in the distance that they hadn’t once taken notice of the forest below them.

An hour passed as the group woke up and ate their breakfast.  After they finished eating, each one of them was pumped and ready for the trek ahead of them.  Brain took point as they began the trek down the winding path that wound around the cliff they had made a camp on.  It wasn’t long before they noticed something odd about the path.

Even though they had slid a few dozen yards down in the cave they emerged from, they were still high enough to warrant the cliff being called a mountain.  The forest below them was at least five-hundred yards down, even though they had not once climbed up during their journey the previous day.  Could the kingdom that was once Everfree have sunk over the years?  Or was this simply the normal terrain of the kingdom?

Brain pondered this for a little while, before deciding that it didn’t matter.  He pressed ever onward, determined to at least reach the stone tree landmark on the map before nightfall.  Without any sort of problem, and in what seemed like just a few minutes, the stallions found their path flattening out into even ground.  The slope continuously became less steep, and the forest appeared in front of them as they circled around the mountain one last time.

To Brain and Chance, this meant that they would be home sooner than they imagined.  To Doctor and Big Mac, this meant that their journey was slowly winding down.  They almost hoped something interesting would happen.

Brain and Chance picked up their paces, heading carelessly into the forest, dead set on reaching the stone tree soon.  Doctor struggled to keep up pace as he took the map from his pouch and scanned it over.  They were headed in the right direction, straight toward the stone tree.  In fact, as he looked around the area, they were headed for a whole bunch of stone trees.  He watched as the scenery around them slowly changed from the brown and green of beautiful, living trees, into the cold, gray color of the statues that were ever more frequently appearing.

Big Mac followed his friends at a comfortable pace.  So long as he kept them in his sight, everything should be alright.  He noticed Doctor’s pace begin to slow as the stone trees became more common.  Catching up to his friend, Big Mac nudged him on the side so as to tell him to hurry.  Doctor put the map back in his pouch and picked up pace, keeping up with Big Mac and keeping the other two in his sights.

After roaming through the forest for about ten minutes, the two stallions leading the group had to stop and rest.  They had worn themselves out in their dead sprint into the forest.  Big Mac and Doctor showed up a few minutes behind them, nonchalantly sitting beside them.

Chance wheezed, “We should have…taken it…a little slower…”

Brain coughed, “Can’t…catch breath…”

Big Mac laughed, barely winded at all, “Y’all oughta learn to take it in short bursts.  You’ll run down your stamina too fast if ya don’t.”

Doctor walked over to the tree the duo had collapsed against.  “This tree seems different, doesn’t it?  Different from the other ones around it?”  He placed a hoof on the tree, and the group jumped as they heard a creaky moan come from the base of it.

“You who have come to find the temple…You have come far…”  The stone tree seemed to speak to the group.  Doctor’s knees gave out on him, and he collapsed to the ground.

Big Mac leaped from his spot, stamping a hoof into the ground.  He called, “Who are you?  Whatcha tryin’ to pull here?”

The tree groaned again, its lowermost branch moving slightly.  “I am the guardian of this forest.  You have come for the temple, have you not?”

Brain stood up and turned to face the tree.  “My friend and I are humans.  We’re going to the temple so that we can go home.”  Brain waved his hand from Chance to himself.

The tree groaned, “Humans?  It has been so long since I last spoke to humans.  The last batch disappeared after the golden tree came to life in Equestria.”

Chance spoke up, still sitting by the tree.  “A human hasn’t visited the temple since the Ever-Pony battle?”

The tree moved its branch again, “Correct.  Nor do I believe another human has entered this world since that day.  Your presence here raises questions.”

Doctor looked at the tree in confusion, “Who was the last person to visit you here?”

The tree groaned louder, “She was a pony, similar to you.  She was on her way to the temple.  She was a treasure hunter.  Her name started with a ‘D’…”

Big Mac took a wild guess, “Daring Do, right?”

The tree’s voice became lighter, “Correct!  Daring Do was her name.  She left for the temple, but she never returned.  I simply assumed she passed through.”

“But I have a book about her adventure to the temple right here!”  Brain pulled the book from his pouch.

Chance knew where Brain was going.  “We can’t have a book about an adventure if she never returned to hand in her notes.”

The tree groaned happily, “I remember watching a giant bird carry a small package over the forest.  Perhaps that package contained what notes she may have taken.”

Brain exclaimed, “So Daring Do was a real adventurer!  Which means the story about the humans is true!  So…all this time people thought they were legends, but now we know they’re real!”

The tree sighed, “The portal has weakened over the years.  I fear that it may not have the power to send either of you home, let alone both.”

Chance’s eyes jolted open.  His heart started racing as fear filled his thoughts.  “Th-there has to be enough for us to get home!  We can’t stay here forever!  We have to try, anyway!”

The tree moved its branch once more.  “If you must try, I shall not stop you.  From this point onwards, the forest has been petrified.  It is a straight shot to the plains that house the temple.  The aura awaits you at the top of the massive stone structure.”  The trees directly to the north of the tree submerged into the ground, revealing a wide pathway.

Brain nodded his head.  “Thank you.  Assuming the portal doesn’t work, we’ll be seeing you again.”  He didn’t waste any time as he darted past the tree, heading into the expansive pathway that led to the plains.  The other stallions followed close behind.

The tree sighed as the stallions ran away.  “Be careful, human.  More may be waiting for you at the temple.”

The group of stallions raced ever forward past the petrified trees and animals.  With each step, impatience filled Brain’s mind.  He wanted nothing more than to finally be finished with this misadventure.  The other stallions were beginning to feel the same as they continued running on and on.  After about fifteen minutes of running and jogging, they finally emerged into the wide open plains they had seen from the mountainside.

Brain stopped suddenly as he saw with full force the beauty of the blue aura.  Chance was caught off guard by it as well, stopping beside his friend.  The other two stallions trotted up behind them, searching around the plains for anything suspicious.  They sighed with relief upon seeing that no horrible monsters were headed their way…

Suddenly, and very painfully, Brain let out a loud sneeze that almost literally sent him flying into Doctor.  He tried to stand back up, but another sneeze knocked him back down.  He looked up at the trio standing around him, frightened expressions on their faces.  He blushed as he laughed, “I guess someone’s talking about me…”

Big Mac and Doctor shared confused looks, whereas a smile graced Chance’s lips.

“Get up, you idiot.  We’re finally almost there.”  He extended a hoof to help Brain up.  Just as Chance started to pull Brain to his feet, he sneezed again, sending them both flying backwards into Big Mac.

The trio of stallions collapsed on the ground, Doctor laughed, “I guess you have an allergy to home, eh?”

Brain’s head started to throb, and for the first time since reaching the forest, his heart began to ache.  The emptiness was back, this time more obvious.  He racked his mind to try and find where the emptiness came from, but it was to no avail.  He sighed once, held his breath, and stood up.  The throbbing stopped and the empty feeling died down a little.  He stared up at the blue glow ahead of them.

“Let’s get this over with fellas.  My head hurts…”

Chapter 11: The Decision of a Mule's Heart

Chapter 11: The Decision of a Mule's Heart

Brain’s heart pounded in his chest as he ran up the long expanse of the ever-rising stairs.  He was determined to finally be done with this adventure.  Getting ever closer to the blue glow of the top of the temple, his muscles burned as he hurriedly leaped from stair to stair.  His friends trailed behind him, keeping a moderate yet slower pace.  Brain stopped to check if they were following him every once in a while, before taking off in a dead run once more.

Chance’s mind raced with hundreds of thoughts about how the day would play out.  If it came down to it, he was ready to abandon his friend in this world.  If for some strange reason only one of them could go home, he decided it would be him.  A sly grin on his face, he raced up the stairs behind Brain, keeping pace with Big Mac and Doctor.  Chance had decided two days ago that he would go home, no matter what the cost.

Big Macintosh couldn’t help but let his mind wander off to Mythol.  He thought for a while about how exactly he’d be able to prove they found the portal.  Then he proceeded to think about how happy she would be that he helped the human get home.  As he raced up the steps behind Brain, a smile covered his face and his eyes filled with excitement.

Doctor Whooves was simply focused on reaching the top of the temple.  He didn’t have any other reason to be excited than for the adventure itself.  And now that they were here, the adventure was drawing to a close.  He thought about his trip home with Big Mac, and how exactly they would get back through the cave.  He also thought about how easy climbing up the stairs had been, and wondered why there hadn’t been any traps.  If a temple had been sitting here for thousands of years, wouldn’t there be animals or insects or plants gathered around it?

Brain’s mind swirled with so many different thoughts as he approached the final step.  Taking it with a leap, he stopped in his tracks on the flat stretch that led straight into the glow.  Sitting on the stone and catching his breath, he waited for his friends to catch up.  They stopped beside him and sat, catching their breaths and watching as the blue glow continued to pour from the very center of the square area they were sitting in.

Brain sighed, “This is it, my friends!  We’ve finally made it!  In a few minutes, I’ll be going home.”  He looked at Chance with a smile.

Chance coughed, “Yep.  Won’t be too long now…”

“It’s been fun, this whole adventure.  I admit I’ll miss this kind of thing.”  Doctor bowed his head, looking from Brain to the glow.

Big Mac cheered, “Eeyup!  We finally got you here, now you just gotta go through it!”

Brain stood up, stamping his hoof and glaring in the direction of the source of the glow.  “C’mon Chance.  It’s time for us to go.”

Doctor asked curiously, “What about your notebook, Brain?  What if you forget about all this when you get to the other side?  Shouldn’t you fill it out?”

Brain looked at Chance then Doctor.  “You have a point.  You don’t mind waiting a few more minutes, do you Chance?”

Chance chuckled, “Of course not.  It’s not like we’re in a hurry now that we’re here.”

Brain sat back down and pulled his notebook from the pouch.  He turned to the first blank page and began scribbling down everything that had happened.  He wrote in great detail about the giant snake, the spider, and the bird.  He wrote about their trek across the water and through the cave.  He was lengthy in describing the events that took place from the forest to the temple.  He even noted the empty feeling he had felt in his gut.  He wrote a little something about each of the four of them.

He made sure to write down everything that had happened to him the last two days.  The visit to the hospital, the meeting with Big Mac and Doctor, the talk with Mythol, the reading of the memoires, the first meeting with Chance, the awkward night with Fluttershy, the adventure, and the end.

As he wrote all this down, his head began to throb.  After he had placed the last period on the paper, the pain became too much for him.  He dropped his pen and cradled his head in his hooves, screaming wildly in pain.  The other three stallions had no clue what was wrong or how they could help.  When a figure burst from the ground behind them, Chance’s reflexes immediately attacked.

The figure was tall, bony, and stood on two legs.  It had leather armor covering its chest and head.  With a wave of its arm, the figure cast Chance to the ground with ease.  It spoke in a hollow voice.  “I haven’t seen a pony such as you in centuries.  Why have you come here, ponies?  The world of humans is not for you.”

As Brain screamed in agony, Doctor took it upon himself to explain the situation to the figure.  “These two stallions are humans!  We’ve come here to send them home!”  With a stamp of his hoof and an angry glare, he stepped toward the figure.

The skeleton sighed, “Has the aura truly weakened to the point that no human can maintain their shape?”

Chance’s eyes filled with fear, “We’re only ponies because the aura is so weak?”

The skeleton laughed, “Yes, I’m afraid so.  You may have come here in vain, ponies.  I would be surprised if the aura could send one of you home, let alone both.”

Chance leaped to his hooves, screaming in anger, “That can’t be true!  It has to let us go home!  We’ve come too far!”

Brain’s screaming suddenly stopped, and he groaned in a pain-filled voice, “We…have to be able…to pass through…”  Fighting through his pain, he put his notebook back in the pouch and walked toward the skeleton.

The skeleton shrugged its would-be shoulders, “I won’t keep you from trying.  Just know that there is a chance neither of you may pass through.  And there is a chance only one may pass through.”

Chance laughed, “We have to try…right?  Even if only one of us passes through, it’s better than neither!”  He started walking toward the glow, a look of horror in his eyes as he realized he may be stuck in this world.

The throbbing in Brain’s head stopped as the emptiness in his gut became more obvious.  He chuckled, “You’re right, Chance.  We have to try.”  He walked toward the glow, standing beside his friend.

The duo of human-ponies walked side by side into the glow, slowly approaching the object that was emitting it.  They exchanged worried looks, unsure of how things would play out.  The two nodded, and reached out toward the object with their hooves.  Slowly, they inched their hooves closer to the object so as not to accidentally set anything off.

Big Mac, Doctor, and the skeleton watched as the two drew ever closer to the object.  Still and yet, neither of them touched it.

At the last second, not even a centimeter away from the object, Brain jerked his hoof back.  Chance looked at him with a curious expression.  “What’s wrong, Brain?  Why’d you stop?”

Brain’s head started to throb again, and he rubbed his temple with a hoof.  He laughed, “This isn’t what I want.”

Chance looked at him, confused.  “What do you mean?  This is all you’ve wanted since you got here!”

Brain felt the emptiness in his gut fade away as he realized just what exactly he wanted.  He thought about the night with Fluttershy, and how comfortable he had been holding her next to him.  He thought about what she had said, and how he had reacted.  As he thought about that night, the emptiness faded.  He knew what he really wanted.  Zecora’s potion was finally starting to take hold on him.

“I can’t go home with you, Chance.  I think I’d rather stay here.”  He opened his pouch, pulling the notebook back out.

Big Mac and Doctor screamed in disbelief, “You can’t be serious!”

The skeleton laughed, “It seems there is a greater magic binding him to this world.  Another pony, if I had to guess.”

Big Mac and Doctor shot him suspicious glares.  Doctor asked, “What do you mean by ‘a greater magic’?  Did someone curse him?”

The skeleton sighed, “Nothing like that, silly stallion.  It is not a curse.  His heart was bound to a pony the moment he arrived here.  I witnessed an event such as this just a few thousand years ago.  Black magic was used to pull him from his world.”

Chance looked at Brain with shock.  He stuttered, “Wh-what are you g-gonna do here?  Where will y-you go?”

Brain smiled as he felt the emptiness fade.  He blushed as he said, “I think there’s a pony waiting for me in Ponyville.”  He rubbed his hoof through his mane.

Chance shook his head in disbelief, “You have a crush on a pony?  You’re staying because you have a crush?”

Brain shook his head.  He said with force, “It’s more than just a crush.  Besides, I think I could get used to this world.  I want you to take this notebook with you, though.  Try and get the contents posted on that website you always talk about.”

Chance grabbed the notebook.  He looked at it with a strange sense of sadness.  “You can’t be serious!  You’re really staying here?  If you don’t go now, you may not be able to go home ever!”

Brain placed a hoof on Chance’s shoulder.  “You’ve been a good friend.  But if it had come down to it, I’d have let you go anyway.  There’s a bit more waiting for you on the other side.”

Chance started to speak, but a stern push knocked him to the side, right into the object at the center of the aura.  In an instant flash of blue light, Chance disappeared.  Standing away from the aura, the other two stallions watched as the glow became faint and small.  The skeleton bowed his head.

“Ha…  I never thought I would see the day that the aura would die.” it sighed.

Big Mac and Doctor stared at the aura with dropped jaws.  Brain was heading in their direction, a smile on his face and a feeling of success in his heart.  The object at the center of the platform still let out a small glow.  Faint, small, and still just as majestic, the glow was a darker blue than before.

The skeleton shook its head, “Even after thousands of years, the aura still refuses to go away.  You three come from a town far away, correct?”

Doctor nodded his head in silence.  He still couldn’t believe Brain had stayed behind.  Big Mac was just as surprised.

Brain chuckled, “What, is there something on my face?”  He looked back toward the glowing object.  “I had every intention of letting Chance go first anyway.  If it only had power to send one of us home, it was gonna be him.  I decided that back at the stone tree.”

The skeleton laughed, “A good friend to have, in my opinion.  Any of my comrades would have fought for dear life to be first!”

Big Mac sighed, “So uh…now we gotta walk back, huh?”

Brain blushed as he said, “Yep!  I guess we’d best get started!”

Doctor walked up to him, anger in his eyes.  “Why the hell would you let a guy like that go first?!  What if we need his help getting back?!”

Big Mac laughed, “Yeah, if another spider tries to eat ya, ya might be screwed!”

The skeleton interrupted their conversation.  “If you need to go home, I think the aura can help.  It may not have much juice, but it should easily get you anywhere in this world.”

The three stallions looked at each other with confused looks.  The skeleton clarified, “The relic was almost never used for travel within this world.  When used to cross to and from the human world, it grew weaker each use.  After the Ever-Pony battle at the golden tree, every human fled, fearing the magic that had made the tree.  The aura was left nearly broken.  Since then, it has been used to travel from one edge of the world to the other, which doesn’t appear to weaken it.”

Doctor clapped his hooves, “So that means that as long as there’s a little juice left, we can use it to get back to Ponyville!”

Big Mac sighed in relief, “No more caves an’ forests for us, eh?”

Brain turned to the skeleton, bowing low.  “Thank you for telling us that.  Mind if I ask you your name?”

The skeleton laughed, “I was known by many names on Earth.  My subjects called me Alaric the Visigoth King.  When a flash of green light blinded me, I awoke here.”

Brain recognized the name from one of his history classes.  “But I thought you died in Cosentia after you ransacked Rome?”

The skeleton slapped a bony hand on Brain’s back.  “You know your history, human!” he cheered.

The other two stallions exchanged confused looks, shrugging their shoulders.  Big Mac interrupted the seemingly familiar pair of once-were humans.  “I hate to be a bother, but I think we oughta head home.  I betcha everypony’s worried about us.”

Doctor laughed, “Sure, that’s why you want to get back.  Are you sure it doesn’t have anything to do with Mythol?”

Big Mac gave him an annoyed glare.  Brain chuckled, “I think you’re right, Big Mac.  Besides, I’m pretty sure I’ve got a pony waiting on me, as well.”

Doctor raised an eyebrow in confusion.  “You have a pony waiting on you?  I wonder who it is…”

Saying their goodbyes to the skeleton, the trio headed toward the glowing object.  Keeping Ponyville in their thoughts, they reached out and touched the object simultaneously.  In a flash of blue light, the skeleton watched them disappear.  He sighed, and then hopped back down the hole he had popped up from.

……

The mares were gathered once more at Zecora’s house, discussing the potion they had been helping her make the last few days.  The pot off to the side of the room bubbled wildly as they spoke.  Zecora walked over to it, smiling widely at the concoction.

Twilight asked, “Isn’t that the potion you gave us the other day?  Why is it bubbling?”

Zecora smiled at her friend.  “Because it has finally taken a hold on the stallion that wished to go home.”  She looked right into Fluttershy’s eyes.  “For a gentle stallion that will love and care… Such a wish should never be left in the air.”  She laughed quietly as the ponies tried to decipher this cryptic rhyme.

Fluttershy gasped as she realized what Zecora meant.  “You did that to me?!”  She screamed in what could be considered both anger and happiness.

Zecora waved her hoof in the air, laughing, “It is a wish that you had made, I simply allowed it to be played.”  She proceeded to explain what she had done.  “The potion showed me that he was a perfect match, so I decided from his home I would snatch!”

The ponies looked at her with expressions of disappointment.  Rainbow Dash scoffed, “You took the dude from his world and turned him into a pony, just so he could get with Fluttershy?”

Pinkie Pie laughed, “I don’t know if that’s being a good friend, or a horrible abuse of your freaky magic!”

Fluttershy blushed as she shouted, “So what happens when he goes home?  Will I have this empty feeling forever?!”  She put her hoof on her chest.

Zecora waved her hoof, a smile on her face.  She repeated, “The potion has finally taken a hold on the stallion that wished to go home.  To you, he will return… As soon as his heart finds that for which it yearns.”

Suddenly, a blue light engulfed to hut, blinding the ponies.  They heard a loud crashing sound and felt rubble fall on top of them.  When the light faded, three stallions were collapsed on a solid plank of wood that covered the pot in the center of the room.  Brain’s eyes opened as the heat from the fire below him singed his coat.

With a yelp, the three stallions were on their feet, standing beside the pot and looking around their surroundings.  The mares greeted them with smiles and cheers.

Doctor groaned as he rubbed his burnt coat.  “So, is this what the skeleton meant when he said it would send us home?  Did he mean it would try and boil us into a potion?”  He stared at the pot in front of him.

Zecora smiled, “I told you he would return to us.  Perhaps you ought to give me your trust.”

Brain looked directly at Fluttershy, his face flushing red and his heart beating faster.  Fluttershy did the same.  The ponies in the room watched as the two embraced, and they listened to Zecora’s final laugh.

“Your hearts, minds, and souls simply clicked, so from his world I did pick.”

Brain gave an angry glare to Zecora, realizing just what she meant.  Then he looked back at Fluttershy.  He scanned the room with his eyes, seeing all of his new friends.  He sighed, “I guess this is my new home.  I think I’ll get used to it.”

Big Mac placed a hoof on his shoulder, “Now, about that camera…”

Brain’s eyes widened in confusion.  “What camera?” he asked bluntly.

Twilight giggled as she reached over and plucked a small round object from Brain’s forehead.  “This camera, silly!”  She held it up for the room to see.

“Where the hell did that thing come from?!”  Brain screamed as he pointed a hoof in its direction.

Doctor chuckled, “Are you telling me you really didn’t know it was there?  These ponies have been recording the whole adventure!”

Brain plopped to the ground, his jaw open wide.  “Why did no one even bother to tell me?” he sighed.

Fluttershy laughed, “Because it was a secret.  If you were going back to your world, we wanted proof that it existed.”

Big Mac slapped Brain on the back, “But what with the tree and the skeleton and the thing in the glow, it’s kinda obvious how real that place is.”

Brain sighed, “So that means you caught Doctor nearly getting eaten by the spider?”  Twilight nodded.  “And Chance being caught by the bird?”  Applejack laughed.  “And the tree talking to us?”  Pinkie Pie bounced in confirmation.  “How about the skeleton popping from the ground?”  Rarity nodded.  “What about-?”

Doctor laughed, “We have everything recorded, Brain.”

Looking around at the ponies in the room, Brain realized that he felt comfortable here among them.  The whole adventure had been recorded, and he would never forget his home.  With a sigh, he stood up.  He looked around the hut, and then looked up to notice the collapsed ceiling.  He blushed as he looked over to the other stallions.

“I guess we have a bit of cleaning up to do, huh?”

Epilogue: In A Mule's Best Interest

Epilogue: In A Mule's Best Interest

It was a bright, beautiful sunny morning in Ponyville.  While Fluttershy and her friends were off helping Zecora gather ingredients for the tenth and final day of potion making, Brain sat in the outdoor café with Big Macintosh and Doctor Whooves.  It had been a week since their adventure began, and they were still happily recalling the memories.

Brain sat back in his chair as they exchanged hindsight-oriented solutions to problems they encountered while adventuring.  For example, if they had looked around just a bit before resting, Doctor probably could’ve avoided being caught in the spider’s web.  Maybe if they had tried to pay attention, they would have seen the giant bird coming at them.

There were a few other details they were nitpicking with.  Then they changed their subject to Chance, and why Brain had let him be the one to cross through the portal.  Brain explained how Chance had a relationship and a high-paying job back home, and how he always took care of his friends when they needed help.  Chance may have seemed like an arrogant prick to people that didn’t hang around him, but Brain knew he was a good guy at heart.

Although Chance had plotted to abandon him there, Brain knew all along that he wouldn’t.  In the end, when it came to the very last instant, Chance hesitated to touch the object at the top of the temple.  He wasn’t really going to abandon his friend…

After an hour of reminiscing, Doctor sighed, “Sadly my friends, I have to cut this rendezvous short.  I have a dentist appointment in a few minutes, and I suppose I need to go freshen up beforehand.”  He hopped from his chair, shaking his head in annoyance.  Doctor couldn’t stand dentists.

Big Mac chuckled, “I s’pose that sucks.  Try not to give him too much trouble.”  Big Mac nodded goodbye to Doctor as he regretfully walked away.  Then he turned back to Brain, “And how’s being a pony treatin’ you?”

Brain sighed, “It’s different, that’s for sure.  And sometimes I wonder how everyone back home is doing.  Then I look at Fluttershy and realize that it’s worth it.  This place is paradise, after all.”

Big Mac stood up from his chair, “I guess I oughta be gettin’ outta here too.  Mythol asked me to be there early today.”

Brain looked at him, a sly smile growing.  He asked, “So, how did Mythol end up repaying your efforts, anyway?”

Big Mac blushed, “N-nothin’ special really…  J-just a little bit more…uh…”  His voice began to trail off.

Brain laughed, “That’s okay, Big Mac!  What happens behind closed doors should stay there, anyway.  You better get going.”  With a nod, Big Mac set off down the road to Mythol’s house.

Brain was left by himself in the café.  He looked up at the sky, letting his mind wander off into space.  Taking a swig of Sweet Apple Cider, he sighed.  He couldn’t help but wonder how Chance was doing, and whether anyone back home was missing him.  He decided to shake the thoughts out of his head.  He finished his cider, tossed a few bits on the table, and got up to leave.

He started to walk away, when a voice caught him off guard.  “Good to see you’ve finally adjusted to life here in Ponyville.”

He turned to see the owner of the café smiling at him.  Brain wasn’t sure why, but the smile was comforting.  “Yeah, and it only took a week…”  He turned and walked away.

He decided he would go to Zecora’s house and hang out with Fluttershy and her friends.  What’s the worst that could happen with all of them around?  Grinning ear to ear, he happily trotted into the Everfree Forest, en route to Zecora’s small hut.  After crashing through the roof a few days ago, Doctor, Big Mac, and he helped to repair it.

Brain sighed as he trotted through the peaceful forest, “I wonder just what shenanigans I’ll be pulled into.  This place does have a track record for crazy stuff…”

THE END

Prologue: All He Wanted Was a Muse, Instead He Got a Mule

Prologue: All He Wanted Was a Muse, Instead He Got a Mule

It was a cold, rainy night in the woods that surrounded Redfield.  Brain sat at his desk, staring at the blank notebook in front of him.  He lifted his pen to the paper as if to write something, but set it back down again.  He tried to think of something cool to write, but nothing came to mind.  Everything he could think of was either copy-written in some way, or just too cliché for his tastes.  As hard as he tried, he simply could not think of anything original that interested him to write about.

He slammed his notebook shut, tossed it to the side, and spun around in his ergonomic computer chair.  He snatched the TV remote off of his bed and with minimal effort on his part, the TV across the room turned on.  He heard a sound that made his mind settle a bit.

“My little pony, my little pony, Ahh ahh ahh ahhh.”  Brain smiled.

His favorite show was just coming on.  He never would have admitted it, but he really enjoyed the show.  As far as he cared, it was better than most cartoons on TV nowadays.  It had morals, comedy, character development, and story.  Those were the important things about it.  All of the fan service- such as the frequent appearance of Derpy Hooves- just made the show better.  Not to mention the musical numbers.

Brain leaned back in his chair, propping his feet up on the table in the middle of his room.  He sighed, “Lauren Faust, you’ve done it again.  Why can’t I come up with something as good as her shows?”  He checked the time on his watch…  It was nearly midnight!  He had forgotten he set his TiVo to record tonight’s new episode before leaving to go hang with his buddies at the bar.

Kicked back, he skipped through the commercials for Barbie dolls and Doggie Doo, pressing play as soon as he thought the show would come back on.  He watched the episode, enjoying every bit of it.  Then the “To Be Continued…” frame popped up, and Brain’s jaw dropped.  He couldn’t believe they would leave the episode off at such a cliffhanger.  He turned off the TV, letting the silence fill the room.

He let his mind wander, imagining how the second part would play out.  He was really getting interested in what happened to Princess Cadence and Twilight Sparkle…  He decided he would try and write once more.  He listened as the rain poured down on the roof of his small house.  It was a soothing sound.  He looked out of his window at just the right time to see what he assumed was a shooting star.

He immediately checked Facebook on his phone to see if anyone else was talking about the shooting star.  Sure enough, they were!  He quickly lifted his head, closed his eyes, and said aloud, “C’mon shooting star, I just need a little muse!  Give me something to work with here!”  He opened his eyes and turned around to face his notebook.  He picked it up from where it landed earlier, opened it up, and stuck his pen to the page.

To his disappointment, even after watching My Little Pony, nothing came to mind.  He sighed disappointedly.  He capped his pen, placing it in the spirals of the notebook’s binding.  He pulled his iPod from the drawer at his side, stuck his earphones in, played his favorite Dan Bull album, and rested his head on the notebook.  He didn’t feel like going to sleep just yet, so he decided it best to avoid the comfort of his bed.  He stared at the notebook, just wishing some sort of muse would come to him.  He really wanted to write.

Before the first song had finished playing, Brain was out like a light.  He snored loudly, drool falling onto the notebook, his iPod still blaring Dan Bull.  Through the window, another shooting star could be seen falling into the horizon.  His TV turned back on, replaying the same episode of My Little Pony as before.  ‘A Canterlot Wedding Part 1’ was the title.  Talk about behind the times…

Brain slept like a baby all through the night…

............................................................................

“Is he even alive?”  Brain thought he heard a girl’s voice.

“I-I don’t know!  I just found him lying there!”  Another voice, softer than the other.

“You didn’t check?”  Yet another different voice, this one sounding proper.

“Well dag nabbit, Fluttershy, ya shoulda checked!”  That voice had a southern accent.

Brain felt a source of heat get right up on him.  He shifted as he felt a circular object put pressure on his chest.  She yelled away from him, “He’s got a pulse, he’s alright.”

Brain opened his eyes to find himself staring face to face with an orange-coated, yellow-mane pony.  The pony’s round green eyes frightened him so much, he literally tossed her off of him and rolled away like a log.

The pony looked at him, “What in tarnation got into you?”

Brain’s eyes jumped from corner to corner, scouting his surroundings.  He honestly didn’t believe this was happening.  “Y-you’re Applejack!”  He pointed at her.

“Uh…’course I am.  Who else would I be?”  She looked back at her friends.

Brain tried to stand on his feet, but immediately lost balance.  He looked himself over carefully…  He found something unsettling as he did so.  His clothes were missing.  His hands and feet were replaced with hooves.  His auburn hair was longer and scruffier.  His body was covered in what can only be described as a brown coat.  He was a pony, or so it seemed.

He cradled his head in his hooves, screaming, “What the fuck is going ooooooooooon!?”  As his voice eventually faded, he stared at his hooves in disbelief.  After staring at himself for about a minute, his eyes rolled back in his head, and he collapsed to the ground.  The other ponies saw that as a chance to get him some help…