Friendship is Witchcraft meets The Mentally Advanced

by TheCrimsonDM

Rating: teen
Tags: Alternate Universe, Spike, Comedy, Crossover, Twilight Sparkle, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 1817

What happens when an angry, drunk Twilight Sparkle creates a portal to an alternate Equestria? Well bad things really, and a very awkward conversation ensues.

What happens when an angry, drunk Twilight Sparkle creates a portal to an alternate Equestria? Well bad things really, and a very awkward conversation ensues.

Published 2015-07-27 03:20:01 UTC
Last updated 2015-07-27 03:20:01 UTC

Hello, My Name is Twilight Sparkle

Friendship is Witchcraft meets The Mentally Advanced

Hello, My Name is Twilight Sparkle

Written by TheCrimsonDM

Deep within the recesses of The Golden Oaks Library stood a purple unicorn whom we all know as Twilight Sparkle. Seeking solace in the privacy of her underground lab she decided that it was time to practice a new spell that she’s been doing research on for quite some time now; a spell that should prove to be most useful.

“Alright, Spike, I’m going to start the countdown, get the net ready,” Twilight said as she stared at her own reflection in the mirror before her. She waited for the dragon’s reply and after a long minute she added, “Spike, did you hear me?” She asked louder than before. Still no reply. With angry eyes she looked over to her side and shouted, “SPIKE!” The dragon wasn’t there.

It took her a moment but she did finally remember where the dragon was. It pained her to imagine what was happening to him right now helping Pinkie Pie out with another one of her parties. How on earth Pinkie had convinced Twilight to let her take Spike for the day was still beyond her.

A bottle of whisky floated over to her lips and she took another swig of the burning liquid before setting herself back up for disappointment. Alright, Twilight. Let’s get this over with.

Her horn glowed a deep shade of pink, and the mirrors reflection began to change. At first the Twilight in the mirror became distorted and disfigured looking, but soon enough the entire surface of the mirror began rippling as though it was liquid. Finally a pink bolt of energy shot from her horn and struck the mirror’s surface and the entire thing stabilized. For a moment she stood there staring at her reflection.

Did it work?

Timidly, Twilight walked up to the mirror and stared at the surface. It looked perfectly normal, but it was supposed to. So her next move was to touch the surface of it, and as her hoof reached for the mirror it sunk through as though it was water. She quickly pulled her hoof back and took a few surprised steps away from the magical object. It actually worked? Suck it Starswirl, I can make portals too.

“I’m going to need to run some preliminary tests on this thing. Send out a drone or two and test the environment on the other side, and if everything looks good I will be able to travel there myself,” Twilight said to herself. After a moment of silence she added lamely, “And I should probably stop talking to myself as well.”

The mirror began rippling again, and much to Twilight’s surprise she watched as the mirror birthed a very familiar pony before her. One that she hadn’t ever wanted to come into contact with. A pony that she might need to destroy in order to protect her secrets. She saw Twilight Sparkle.

The new Twilight simply smiled at her and said, “You’re so beautiful.”

This is going to be worse than I thought.

***

Meet Twilight Sparkle, the most perfect, special, magical princess in the whole of Equestria. She might be Princess of the Night, but that wouldn’t stop her from being in the daylight as much as possible. So that’s exactly why she was inside on this beautiful sunny day, in her basement, organizing her wall of fanfiction.

“Hmm, should I put the ‘Evil cult orgy of Fluttershy’ in the clop section, or the horror section?” She asked herself. “Ugh, why don’t I have a section for horror-clop. There should be one, but there isn’t.” She let out a sigh and set the book down. “I guess I’ll have to spend the whole day re-organizing my wall. I feel so bad for all of my friends, they won’t get to see me today. I sure hope that they don’t have any problems that only a princess like me can solve.”

Suddenly a pink light lit up the basement she was currently occupying. Twilight Sparkle couldn’t help but to look over and see the light coming from her mirror. “So pretty.”

Twilight walked over to the mirror, she couldn’t help but wonder what was going on with it. The only time she’d seen a strange mirror like this before was that one time she went to another dimension and became a Japanese schoolgirl. Her heart began racing at the thought of being able to do this a second time. Quickly, and without regard for her own personal safety, Twilight jumped into her mirror. The second she touched it, her body sank through and she felt herself getting whisked away to another place.

***

Twilight stared at the copy of herself who had just come through the portal. The initial thought she had included; why doesn’t she smell like alcohol? Why is there a crown on her head? And last but not least, should I kill her now and cover up the evidence, or learn more about my new copy before I do her in.

The new Twilight smiled at her and said, “Hello, my name is Twilight Sparkle, I’m the Princess of the Night. Are we in Japan?”

The Princess of the Night? In what world am I related to Princess Celestia… you know what I don’t want the answer to that.

“Okay, well my name is also Twilight Sparkle, and welcome to our world,” Twilight introduced herself to the princess.

Princess Twilight stared at her with wide eyes before saying, “You mean that there’s a pony who’s just as smart and pretty as I am?”

“Great so you’re a narcissist. This is going to be just great,” Twilight replied. She looked over at her bottle of whisky longingly. Maybe another swig will make this okay?

Princess Twilight walked around a little bit examining the room. She stared at the empty shelves, the boxes all stacked up in the corner, and the empty bottles of booze. Finally she took a deep breath and her face turned green. ”What in Equestria is that smell?”

“It’s a basement it’s not supposed to smell good,” Twilight replied.

Princess Twilight sniffed again, covered her nose, and cringed. “It smells like alcohol and sweat.”

Twilight took one sniff of her fur and cringed. Okay, so it was actually me.

“Sure it smells bad, but seeing another version of myself. I can’t wait to write to Princess Celestia about this,” Princess Twilight said.

That’s odd, nopony speaks about our benevolent tyrant with such enthusiasm… well aside from the cultist.

“So,” Twilight asked, “What is your Princess Celestia like?” Wait, why did I ask that? Saying her name is a bad omen.

“Oh she’s wonderful. She gave me my wings, and my castle, and my friends, and she let me live in Ponyville so that I could go on a magical journey of friendship and adventure,” Princess Twilight explained. “I send her letters every week, sometimes more, and she reads each and every single one of them. She always tells me just how much she loved to hear about the lesson that I learned that day. Oh and she was the one who married me to my brother. She’s really nice.”

“Okay, so she’s kind, listens to you, and doesn’t get angry at the letters you send her. Interesting…” Twilight said as she pondered exactly what kind of world this Princess Twilight came from. Wait a minute, did she say she married her own brother?

“Oh what’s your Celestia like?” Princess Twilight asked.

Okay, so I’ll have to deal with an annoying husband who is probably terrible in bed; if his marefriends are any testament to that. But it does sound like a nice place to live…

“Do you even have a Princess Celestia?” Princess Twilight asked.

An evil grin grew across Twilight’s face as she looked at her counterpart and said, “Yes we do. And I think that she’d be very much interested in hearing about friendship lessons from you. Why don’t you go upstairs and talk to her?”

“YES!” Princess Twilight squealed. She than began trotting up the stairs and disappeared from sight while calling out, “Princess Celestia, your favorite student has arrived!”

She is going to get herself killed. Oh well, time for the escape.

Quickly Twilight over the floor and found an old potion. She hated it the last time she used it but this was necessary. The potion lifted up to her mouth and she took a swig of it. An intense pain grew in her bowls, moved up to her back, into her chest, and up her throat. Quickly she leaned over, and all the alcohol came back up. Just great, perfectly good booze wasted.

She looked at her back and saw two new wings there. These might not last forever, but she could replicate the potion at her leisure now. She wasn’t trying to become an alicorn for the sheer fun of it though, she was being objective. Twilight’s horn again began to glow as she summoned forth new found magical powers.

Lightning crackled and the air tore open in front of her. A small purple dragon fell to the floor, his eyes were opened wide in horror as he looked at Twilight Sparkle. He stood up weakly and asked, “Twilight, is that you?”

“Yes it is, and,” Twilight said as she lifted him up onto her back. “We’re leaving for good.”

Quickly Twilight galloped forward and leapt into the mirror portal. After she was gone the basement got quiet. A few minutes later Princess Twilight came back down the stairs while saying, “I couldn’t find Princess Celestia anywhere, but I did find a Fluttershy in desperate need of a good friendship lesson. Maybe we could team up and-“she looked around the room and after not seeing her doppelganger went back upstairs. “Okay, so we’ll need to sing the song that fixes all of your problems without her.”

A meek voice replied, “If you say so…”

As the door closed upstairs a dim pink light came from the mirror and Spike was flung through the mirror and onto the hard cold floor. The dragon looked up at the portal and watched in terror as the mirror shattered before him. For a minute he just lay there on the floor doing nothing. Finally he whined, “I don’t get it, why would Princess Twilight throw me into a mirror? And why does this place look like our old basement… only empty... and it smells like alcohol.”

The End

Author's Note

So yeah, I've had this idea for a while now. A story where the Friendship is Witchcraft meets the Mentally Advanced series. Basically this was just a concept, so if anyone out there feels inspired to go out and write another story about this go ahead. XD