Discord After Dark

Caelum cautiously walked down the dark, lonely hallway towards Luna's private quarters. Despite his best efforts, his hoofs echoed with each step, giving away his presence to anypony that may be even remotely close by. However, he somehow managed to make it almost all the way to his goal without running into any other pony, and surprisingly when he peeked around the last corner he saw a distinct lack of any guards outside Princess Luna's room.

Instead, a familiar draconequus was leaning against the wall next to the ornate door, twirling a familiar key around haphazardly.

"Right on time!" Discord said slightly too loudly for Caelum's tastes as he approached.

"Shh! Quiet! You'll get us caught!" the scared pony hissed.

Discord spread his arms dramatically. "Look around, nopony else is here! It's just you and me." he said.

The fact didn't cause Caelum to feel any better. "Can we go now? I'm here, aren't I?" he whined.

Discord shook his head before inserting the key into the lock. The soft 'click' of the key unlocking the door sounded like a deafening boom to Caelum, and before he could protest anymore Discord cracked open the bedroom door and slipped inside the room.

Caelum's heart froze when he saw Discord go inside. Protocol prohibited anypony from entering Princess Luna's private bedchambers unless approved by Princess Luna herself, and here he was, Private Caelum, letting the chaotic maniac Discord loose inside. 'And I haven't even been a guard for a month yet!'

"Psst! Discord. Hey, Discord." Caelum hissed through the ajar doorway. There was of course no response, so Caelum slowly poked his head inside to see if he could find Discord. "Psst! Hey, you in-"

With a sudden flash of light, Caelum found himself pulled inside the room with magic, teleported next to Discord in the blink of an eye. He brought a hoof to his mouth as nausea set in. Being a pegasus, he always felt a little sick going through teleportation training in basic training, and was something he tried to avoid at all costs. Thankfully, it only took a few moments for the sickly feeling to subside, but as he became aware of his surroundings a new feeling of illness began to set in.

'Oh Celestia's flank, I'm in Princess Luna's room.'

'OH LUNA'S FLANK, PRINCESS LUNA'S RIGHT THERE!'

Caelum staggered backwards as he finally realized that he and Discord were standing right next to the Princess of the Night herself. Caelum quickly cowered on the floor when he saw that Luna's horn was aglow with magic, and for a few split seconds he saw his short life flash before his eyes. Only when almost a full minute had passed did the pegasus guard open his eyes, wondering why he hadn't been obliterated yet.

Discord fell onto the ground. "Ahahaha! You should have seen the look on your face!" he laughed.

Taking a moment to look closer, Caelum saw that Princess Luna's eyes were indeed closed as she lay upon her bed, and though her horn was lit there didn't seem to be any spell being cast. "Is... is she asleep?" he wondered aloud.

It took a few moments for Discord to regain his composure. "Not quite. She's off influencing the dreams of ponies or something like that." he said, drawing dangerously close to the princess. "Oh, don't worry so much. She won't wake, even if you poke her. Watch."

Caelum flinched as Discord poked the tip of Princess Luna's muzzle, but true to Discord's words she didn't even stir.

"See?" Discord said proudly. "So long as you don't interrupt her magic or touch her too hard, she won't wake up or ever know we were here."

Caelum cautiously approached the 'sleeping' princess and waved a hoof in front of her face. He felt a wave of relief wash over him as he saw that the princess didn't seem to notice him at all, but the discomfort of being in Princess Luna's room was still as strong as ever.

"Can we go now? We're done in here, right?" he asked nervously.

"Oh, come now, surely this is a once in a lifetime opportunity you don't want to miss out on." Discord said as he slowly walked around Luna's bed. "Surely you must have been curious as to what she does all night in her room. Well, now you have free access to her room every night!"

Caelum backed away from where Luna lay. "B-but how do we know she won't wake up right now?" he worried. "If she... right now... we'd both be dead."

Discord sighed impatiently. "She's off monitoring the dreams of every pony in Equestria. EVERY. PONY. Do you know how many ponies there are out there? She's busy every second of the night."

Despite Discord being, well, Discord, Caelum knew there was truth in his words. Visiting everypony in Equestria, even in their dreams, was no small task and would surely occupy her entire night. "So... what are we supposed to be doing in here?" he asked.

"Whatever we want to, my little pony!" Discord said, spreading his arms wide open before walking over to a dresser. "Anything your heart desires. I think Luna here keeps her spare crowns in here. Yes, ta-dah!"

Caelum ignored Discord as he began trying on an assortment of Luna's items and instead took a look around the room. It was the first time he had ever seen the inside of Luna's bedroom, and he doubted many other guards had ever seen what lay inside. There was of course also little doubt that no other guards had ever witnessed the princess in her current state of unconsciousness due to how vulnerable she was at the moment. In her current state she appeared to be completely helpless and exposed. Even when Discord had touched her muzzle she didn't stir. 'I wonder what it would take to wake her up...'

The look of curiosity on Caelum's face was more than noticeable to Discord. "She doesn't react to any sounds, no matter how loud. The only time I've ever managed to wake her was when I... er, I mean I saw somepony throw her down some stairs."

"You what?!" Caelum gasped in shock. "Wait, you've snuck in here before?!"

"No no no." Discord said. "I said somepony else made her fall and all that. I just happened to be walking by when she woke up, is all. But that was when she would spend her nights in the astronomy tower. Ever since then she's been locking herself away in here, where it's no fun."

Curiosity was once more rearing its head inside Caelum's head. "So, um, what would her limit be, then?" he asked hesitantly.

Discord smiled as he finally broke through. "Oh, well, something like this." he said mischievously. Before Caelum could react and stop him, Discord 'poofed' over back next to Luna, raising her tail with his claw while his paw reached back. Time seemed to freeze for a moment before Discord followed through with his demonstration, firmly slapping Luna's flank. It definitely wasn't as hard as he could have, but it was with enough force that a normal sleeping pony would wake up in shock.

Caelum flinched and held his breath in fear, but to his relief Princess Luna remained in her strange trance. "What are you doing? You're going to wake her!" he snapped at Discord.

"Haven't you been paying attention? I told you, I know how much one can get away with." Discord replied. "Besides, you can't say you haven't wanted to try that yourself."

Despite his training telling him to say no, Caelum couldn't help but admit to himself that watching Discord temporarily reveal Princess Luna's flank had begun to fulfill the fantasy that he and many other guards secretly held. Still, the sense of duty outweighed the urge to act upon his more primal instincts.

And he hoped it would stay that way.

Discord pushed Caelum forward so he was closer than ever to the 'sleeping' princess. "Go ahead, see for yourself." he urged.

Caelum didn't know why he was following Discord's advice, but before he knew it he had extended a hoof and was touching the exact spot Discord had slapped just moments ago. His hoof made a small circular pattern, perhaps in an effort to rub away any pain that may have been lingering from Discord's strike.

Discord smiled in satisfaction. "See? You're perfectly safe. Nopony will ever know." he said slyly.

Discord's words only made it halfway through Caelum's head before they dissipated. The guard pony was completely mesmerized by Luna's body, and without even knowing it his outstretched hoof was slowly beginning to move underneath Princess Luna's tail. He wasn't quite touching it yet, but he could already feel the heat from... her...

"Anyway!" Discord suddenly announced, causing Caelum to quickly withdraw his hoof. "I forgot to grab something before coming here. Not sure where I left it... could have left it all the way... or maybe... no matter. I'll be back eventually, but don't let that stop you from having some fun until I return."

Snapping his talons, the doors to Luna's bedroom shut and locked before Discord disappeared off to Celestia-knows-where, leaving Caelum alone with the princess. He glanced at the clock, seeing that it had only been 20 minutes since he and Discord met outside her room. Changing his focus, he looked back at the unconscious princess in front of him, and more specifically, her available and unguarded flank.