One Crime at a Time

Chapters

Prologue
Chapter 1 - Traumatized
Chapter 2 - Growing Up
Chapter 3 - Single Parent
Chapter 4 - Eager Student
Chapter 5 - Eternal Night (Pt. 1)
Chapter 6 - Eternal Night (Pt. 2)
Chapter 7 - Eternal Night (Pt. 3)
Chapter 8 - Eternal Night (Pt. 4)
Chapter 9 - Eternal Night (Pt. 5)
Chapter 10 - Eternal Night (Epilogue)
Chapter 11 - Action
Chapter 12 - Honesty
Chapter 13 - Lying Beast
Interlude I - The Bitter Crown
Chapter 14 - Taking Stock
Chapter 15 - The Old Hunter
Chapter 16 - Stalliongrad
Chapter 17 - Thy Name, Temptation
Chapter 18 - Traitor
Chapter 19 - Infiltration
Chapter 20 - Hostile Takeover
Chapter 21 - Aftermath
Chapter 22 - Homecoming
Chapter 23 - Introductions
Chapter 24 - Changing Pace
Chapter 25 - Heartfelt
Chapter 26 - Awkward
Chapter 27 - Chilling Out
Chapter 28 - S'mores
Chapter 29 - Evil Enchantress
Chapter 30 - The Pink Condition
Chapter 31 - Drinks
Chapter 32 - Interrogation
Interlude 2 - A Day Among the Mortals
Chapter 33 - An Old 'Friend'
Chapter 34 - Return
Chapter 35 - Parasites
Chapter 36 - Hanging With Soldiers
Chapter 37 - Toying With Soldiers

Prologue

Prologue

written by Fire Soul

There were a lot of jumbled and confusing thoughts running through my mind in that moment. I could feel my entire body shaking with an emotion I didn't entirely understand...or rather, one that I wasn't very familiar with. It was as if all of my silent anger and all of my unrecognized fears had been stirred in a pot, and what came from that unholy union was a feeling I couldn't put a word to.

"Twilight. What are you doing?"

I could feel the pistol shaking in my magical grip, the turmoil in my mind making even basic telekinesis a grand feat of personal focus. It was a simple thing, a snub-nosed pistol, standard issue for most of the police, minotaur in design. We had more appropriate designs for ponies, but given how small and abundant they were, they were still the standard for unicorns.

I had swiped it from one of the guards in the interrogation room, who genuinely thought the basic suppressor on my horn was enough to restrain me. Then again, they probably didn't have access to anything military-grade or stronger.

Currently, I had it pointing at my mentor's head, inches from her snout.

I wanted to shoot her. The audacity she had, sitting there talking as if she could make everything I did seem reasonable! Like she could just sweep it away! It would be so easy, just a quick pull of the trigger, and the last big obstacle that suddenly decided to rear it's beautiful, majestic self in front of me, taking me completely by surprise....!

"Look at me, Twilight. Move away from your thoughts and listen to me."

As if slipping out of a self-induced trance, I met my mentor's eyes while something wet and warm trickled down my left cheek. My vision was rapidly becoming blurry as I took in the raw sympathy and regret I saw in that normally alabaster, fake gaze. Not many ponies in the world could say that they'd ever seen the Princess without her royal face on, but in that moment I felt...I don't know, ashamed? Sad? Broken, perhaps? I was in no condition to really understand myself, let alone my feelings.

"They hurt you, Twilight. They hurt you in a way that you couldn't possibly have understood back then-"

I felt that indescribable emotion rise up again, and I pressed the barrel of the gun firmly against the base of her horn. The room suddenly burst with activity and noise as the guards struggled against my barrier pinning them to the walls of the room, shouting over one another to try and warn Celestia to get away from me.

I was a certified killer and criminal, after all, and I had a gun pointed at her head.

She quickly raised both of her forehooves into the air and ordered them to calm down. I almost pulled the trigger when she did that...for all the good it'd do, anyways. She'd startled me, and I'd stumbled up from my seat and kicked the chair over behind myself in the process.

She turned her attention back to me, and I wilted away from her on reflex, as if she might lash out at me like a snake and put me down like the animal I was. I knew what I'd done.

"They made you use magic that no one has any business ever using when you were a little filly. There was nothing you could have done, and you know this. You're a logical mare. You know what that kind of magic does to a pony's mind."

I could hear the pleading tone in her voice, that desperation to get me to understand and accept it. Thing was, I'd accepted it a long time ago, but I never expected it to ever wind up being my saving grace. I didn't want a saving grace, I didn't deserve a saving grace!

"You haven't been truly yourself for many years, and we know what's wrong," she said, gently pushing the gun away from her forehead with her hoof. "You wouldn't have done any of these if it weren't for that magic's influence on you. If you would just let me help you-"

I screamed and pulled the trigger. The bullet impacted the wall and Celestia's ear lowered instantly while she visibly grimaced. Good chance I temporarily fucked up her hearing, but at the moment I really didn't care. She was saying things I didn't want to hear. Things I didn't want to admit made perfect sense. I didn't deserve to get off scot-free for what I'd done. There was nothing fair about that!

"Don't you DARE...try to make it sound like I wouldn't do what I did! Twilight Sparkle would've gladly gone down as a martyr if it meant dealing crime a fatal blow in Equestria!"

The sudden slam of Celestia's hooves on the table made it crack in front of me, and I jerked further away from her.

"Not if it meant sacrificing the lives of other ponies, be they good or bad! I refuse to believe that!"

"How would you know?! You never even knew I existed until I was thirteen!"

"I know that a little filly wouldn't do these things of her own volition, and once you were forced to you had no idea of what it was doing to you until it was too late!"

I could see her take a deep breath and let it out, slowly taking her seat once more. I hadn't even noticed that she'd taken the gun from me, snatched it out of my magical grasp with her own. It was quickly disassembled in mid-air, the pieces clattering to the floor.

"What about your brother, Twilight? Your friends, your parents..." she said, giving me a disappointed glare. "Gadget?"

I froze at the mention of her name. The image of that powerful, beautiful mare stuck in my head, and something in me crumbled away. My trembling legs caved beneath me, and I buried my head beneath my forehooves. I had nothing left in me.

"I don't know...!"

I didn't know when I'd started crying in earnest, or when Celestia had held me in her hooves, but I clung to her as if my life depended on it. Nothing made sense anymore. All I could do was bury my muzzle in my teacher's chest until I cried myself to sleep.

I dreamt of the early days. Simpler days. I remembered reading books in the park about magical theory, going to a nice school with other fillies and colts my age. I remember Moondancer, one of the few fillies that could keep up with me...so many things.

Then I remembered how it all started. No rest for the wicked.

Chapter 1 - Traumatized

Chapter 1 - Traumatized

written by Fire Soul

It started rather suddenly, when I thought back on it. Such a simple thing as a deal with a supposed family friend became the very thing that utterly destroyed my innocence. Well, that and my parents lacking proper moral fiber, though in all fairness if they didn't do what they did I have no idea how they would've repaid the debt. That would've been...far worse.

My talent with magic, even at the age of six, hadn't escaped the notice of my parents. Nor did my excessive mental acuity when it came to school in general. It was known to pretty much everyone that knew me that I was a very fast learner, more akin to a sponge soaking up the ink in books rather than a pony reading the words and numbers and symbols they formed. This, of course, included any magical tomes my parents could afford to get their hooves on.

So when some very shady ponies came knocking at our door demanding the money my parents owed them, I was entirely unaware of what was going on when my parents told me that a friend of theirs wanted my help with a magic spell he couldn't understand on his own. To say that I was joyous at the vindication that comes with someone else asking for my help, especially at that age, is an understatement. I quickly slipped into my clothes and we hopped in a carriage late in the evening with the two ponies that came for us, leaving Shining sleeping in his room.

Some might wonder where my brother was during all of this, but my parents made sure to keep him out of it. I think he always suspected, but he never seemed to think it had anything to do with me. He dropped it after they stopped coming around to get me, and he went to the youth training camp to prepare for a future career as a member of the Royal Guard. I was very much broken-in by then. I went of my own accord, for fear of my family suffering for my impudence.

Anyways, I arrived at a large mansion closer to the castle, with my parents accompanying me. I think I was too eager and excited to realize just how tense my parents were. Not to mention how condescending the two thugs accompanying us in the carriage were when I talked to them. Still, kind of funny to realize that I was smarter and more knowledgeable than both of them even at the age of six.

It's so easy to think back on your younger days and ask yourself 'Why did I not notice this?' or 'Why didn't I ever suspect something was wrong?' We tend to forget how inexperienced we are when we're children, how easy it is for us to do things that we can recognize as obvious mistakes once we're older. We know better when we're older. We can reflect on our mistakes and learn from them when we're older.

I had no idea what I was getting into. My lack of genuine social skills and understanding of body language and social cues certainly didn't help.

I didn't question the numerous ponies in suits with weapons strapped to their sides. I didn't question why they were all unicorns, and why they all seemed tense when we entered. I almost can't believe I didn't think something was wrong when my parents were led away and I was escorted to meet the stallion of the mansion. I should have been so scared, but all I could think of was how eager I was to help him figure this spell out, maybe even get a chance to see it in action!

Further proof that there is more than one form of superior intellect in the world. You know...because I was a fucking moron. Most children are, just in an adorable way. They don't know any better!

I should have known something was off the moment I met him. He was a tall, imposing figure with a razor-sharp gaze and a presence that immediately demanded respect. He sat with a cordial, firm posture, head held high and long sharp horn pointing towards the sky, recently polished and cleaned. He was not a pony to be trifled with.

I squee'd with glee when I realized that he was one of the Royal Magisters. As I said, moron. Hope you know what you're getting into, parents, or you're in for a very unwanted end to an era!

There was a certain joy in my eyes that he found amusing, even as he laid the spell out in front of me. He knew exactly what he was doing. He knew what the spell would do if he tried to use it. It was experimental in nature, I know that now. I didn't know that back then. I took it in within hours, and once he was sure I knew it inside and out, he escorted me to a room in his mansion in the basement, far away from prying eyes.

It was a laboratory, that much was clear, and it was all his. I dreamed of having a place like that for myself when I grew up, all the beakers and chemicals and magical components I'd ever need to become the next Starswirl the Bearded! Moondancer would've lost it if she'd been there with me!

My cheer faded significantly when I was led down a long hallway into a very secure room near the back of the basement. A thick steel door adorned with runes made me nervous, and as it slid open and I was ushered inside, I immediately knew something was wrong.

Inside, four more of the suit-wearing guards stood vigil around a single bound earth pony mare, bound and gagged and blindfolded in a chair. She had a few bandages wrapped around her hindlegs, and her forelegs were tied behind her back while her hindlegs were tied to the chair. The chair itself was made of metal and bolted to the floor.

I trembled at the sight of her. There was something undeniably wrong about what I was seeing, and the sudden closing and locking of the steel door behind me made my fur bristle. Something was off.

Honeyed words swayed me, however. Most likely because I didn't want to believe or couldn't imagine the horrible scenario this actually was. He quickly reassured me that she was simply a mentally sick mare that, hopefully, I would be able to help by using this spell.

Regardless of my nerves, I cast the spell, fully believing I was helping this listless, seemingly exhausted mare. I would never forget what happened after that.

It's a strange feeling, touching someone else's mind. I could hear echoes of her thoughts alongside surface memories of what she was currently thinking about. A young stallion in a town I didn't recognize, visits to what were probably friends, store owners she knew personally...I found myself wondering who she was. I proceeded further with the spell.

I jolted and my eyes shot open when I suddenly heard the chair rattle, and she began to cry out into her gag. I stood transfixed as more memories poured to the surface, more than I could comprehend merely as a viewer. Every time my magic poked or prodded her mind, she twitched and became more panicked.

He told me to continue calmly, and I did as I was told, albeit reluctantly. Even I knew something was very wrong, and though I didn't recognize the feeling deep in the pit of my stomach at the time, some part of me knew that I'd gotten involved in something very, very bad.

I moved on to the next part of the spell, and her entire body suddenly went taut, and she screamed loudly into her gag. Two of the guards moved to restrain her, but that superior earth pony strength gave them a hard time. The bindings strained and the chair began to bend a little as she thrashed and threw her body this way and that, screaming muffled incomprehensible words while I probed deeper.

The blindfold fell away, and she looked right at me. I froze and met her gaze, her terrified, pleading gaze that rooted me in place and made me feel something akin to being caught rummaging through the kitchen shelves for the cookie jar, but ten times worse. I felt nauseous when her thoughts suddenly turned to shock and disgust, and I began to appear in her mind. I could see myself, and I could feel her disbelief that it was me in her head.

I stopped the spell and she instantly settled down, that intense exhaustion washing over her again and making her slump in her seat. I turned to the Magister and told him that something was wrong with the spell, that no spell should do this, but he simply told me to continue. He seemed different now...cold. Calculating. Uncompromising. I didn't notice this until I said no and he pressed a gun to my head in response.

I felt true terror in that moment. Even a child knows what a gun is, and as a much smarter child than most, I knew that a single errant pull of the trigger would mean my instantaneous death. I wouldn't even have time to scream.

I stood there trembling like a leaf in the wind as he pulled the hammer back on the pistol, the click of that deadly device causing me to almost piss myself. I didn't want to die. I was a child, the idea of death terrified me more than anything else. I could feel his breath on my ear as he leaned down towards me, and suddenly his presence was infinitely more scary than it had been before.

He threatened my life, but even worse than that, he threatened the lives of my parents. My friends at school. My BBBFF (he even knew I called him that and what it stood for!). He swore that if I didn't do as I was told, he'd kill them all before he killed me. I cried and stayed stock-still, as if doing so would somehow save me from what was rapidly becoming the most abysmal of fates I could imagine at the time.

He pressed the barrel of the gun to the back of my head and told me to continue the spell. I looked to the mare, hoping that somehow, just maybe, she could get me out of here. She stared at me, silently pleading for her life, but I think even she knew that there was nothing I could do. I didn't have a choice.

I clenched my eyes shut and focused on the spell again, and I instantly heard her screams pick up once more. I just wanted it over with, so I tried to do it as quickly as I could. All four guards were holding her still as best they could while she tossed and turned and thrashed and screamed into the air like a wild, desperate animal. I couldn't help but open my eyes and watch her in morbid fascination as we both quickly became overwhelmed. The spell was reaching a tipping point, I could feel it in my horn, and I think she could feel it just as much as I could.

Her eyes rolled back while her entire body went rigid, and with a resigned cry, I put the final piece of the spell into action. I didn't know what was going to happen, but I certainly didn't expect her consciousness to shatter before me.

Her tension instantly went slack and her head hung limp at an odd angle, and all of her memories began to pour into me, like a dam had been broken and I was to be the next container for them all. I felt a lifetime of memories rapidly rush into my mind at an alarming rate, and my horn began to flare with an intense brightness and heat that made my head hurt more and more as time went on.

I felt someone catch me as my legs failed me, and the room began to spin as I tried to look at the mare. She wasn't moving. She wasn't even breathing. Her eyes were rolled back in her head, only half-closed. Before I could even begin to consider what had happened to her, I passed out in the Magister's hooves.

I saw memories that weren't my own as I slept, and when I woke, it was morning. A brief concern for being late to school entered my mind before a rush of memories from the night before made me curl up in my bedsheets and cry my eyes out. On some level, I knew what I'd done, what I'd been forced to do, but I didn't want to believe it. That mare was dead, and it was because of me!

The door to what was most definitely not my room opened, and I peeked out from under the covers enough to see the Magister walking towards me. He yanked the covers off of me right after I ducked my head back under them, and demanded that I follow him. I remembered the feel of the gun pressing to my skull, and I silently obeyed. What else would he force me to do, I wondered?

I was brought to a desk while a glass of water and an aspirin were placed in front of me. I quickly downed the pill without hesitation, my head still throbbing from using that horrible, terrifying spell. After that, a stack of papers were placed in front of me, along with several reservoirs of ink and multiple quills. He told me to sit there and write down every more recent memory I could bring to the forefront from the mare last night. When I asked him why, he told me to simply do as I was told.

It took several hours. Several hours of sifting through memories that weren't my own, writing as many of them down as I could before they faded away, like a bad dream. I felt almost numb after a while, falling into the rhythm of working to pull those fading memories to the surface, then writing them down in as explicit detail as I could manage.

I saw her first time tasting a fresh pastry when she was a little filly, I saw and felt her excitement when her parents praised her for getting an A on a test...and many things I didn't understand until my parents explained it to me. I now feel a certain retro-active delight in knowing that I probably made him extremely uncomfortable, forcing him to read multiple detailed descriptions of kinky sexual acts written down by a six-year-old that didn't have a clue what she was seeing, aside from knowing that it was sex.

What? I was a very well-educated young filly (see: self-educated), but even I didn't know what bondage or anal were! I wasn't exactly interested in sex, or what my genitalia did aside from being the way I go to the bathroom. There were other issues of course, but they didn't crop up until a few years down the line.

Looking back upon what I'd went through, I began to adjust to it alarmingly fast. Sure, I still broke down during the carriage ride home, and my parents tried to console me as best they could, but when all was said and done, I really seemed to recover quicker than I should've.

The thugs that accompanied us insisted that we speak of it to no one. One of them eyed me and smugly reminded us that we'd better come up with a believable lie to tell my brother, or else he might have to be persuaded to keep his mouth shut. Even I knew what they meant by that.

It was impossible to console me, by the time we got home. I think the only reason I wasn't bawling my eyes out was because I was still in shock, and the memories I'd taken from that mare's mind were beginning to fade.

Some lingered. Others faded away completely. It made my memory feel incomplete, and my Father was afraid for me. I fell asleep in the embrace of my parents, and I can only assume they put me to bed. After all, that's where I woke up later that night. I didn't go to school for three days, and when Shining came to spend time with me in my room, I simply told him I wasn't in the mood.

Credit where it's due, my parents were and still are hard workers. Mom usually spent her time at her personal office, a quiet place that's sort of like her own personal happy haven, where she's cut off from the world and she can really get into her writing. Dad sometimes spends multiple days and nights at the castle's observatory, charting the stars and documenting new findings when he isn't busy working on his alchemical theories.

Them not being home when Shining Armor woke up wasn't anything unusual. He usually woke up ready to make breakfast for both of us before we headed off to school. Mom even taught him how to cook! Her mentality was 'You'll do it whether I tell you to do it or not, so I'd better just teach you how to do it right!'

However, me not being home when he woke up was an immediate abnormality that caught his attention. My parents had thought of a valid excuse, though. One that they told me about before Shining got to me.

Apparently I suddenly had a very bad stomach virus, and my parents rushed me off to the doctor, where I had to stay overnight for observation! Now whatever I had had me feeling sick and listless and tired, so I was to stay in bed for a few days. It wasn't entirely a lie, I certainly didn't feel like doing much of anything, or talking to anyone or...or seeing anyone. I saw enough of a certain someone every time I closed my eyes.

I will never forget the look on her face in that final moment, or the mental, primal scream of terror I heard from her as I shattered her mind. Then the utter, absolute silence, the absence of anything resembling a consciousness...I quivered in my bed and burrowed deeper under my covers. In my childish naivete, I felt safe under them, as if the world would disappear if I just stayed underneath it for long enough.

The next day, after Shining Armor left for school, that childish hope evaporated with a single loud knock on our front door.

I rose up out of bed. I don't know why. Morbid curiosity, maybe? I don't think I was thinking at that moment. I'd been roused from a half-asleep state, a blissful moment in time where my thoughts and my dreams didn't meet halfway. Peace.

I looked down into the foyer, and my blood ran cold. There was no more exhaustion, only a base animal instinct to flee from the danger before me. My parents were talking with some very suspicious ponies, one a pegasus and another a unicorn. They were peeking through the doorway, and my Father was barring their entry. My Mother seemed...very upset, but she was holding her tongue even as things got more heated between my Father and the two ponies.

"...done enough to her, what more could you want?!"

I trembled and ducked down, hugging myself against the carpet. This wasn't happening. I didn't want to believe this was happening again!

"The boss wants her help again. What, you tryin' ta go back on the deal, pretty-colt?"

"The deal was that she helped him, and she did!"

I could almost hear the smugness wafting off of that pegasus as that vile grin spread across his face. They both shoved their way into our home, and both my Mother and Father were immediately flaring up their horns. The unicorn was faster, drawing two pistols from their holsters and aiming both at them.

I whimpered and covered my muzzle with my hooves, trying to stay as silent as possible while I watched my worst nightmares begin to unfold in front of my eyes.

"Close, but I believe the deal was that you agreed to let her help him. Nothin' specific about how long. The boss is reasonable enough though, if you'd like ta discuss certain terms to the deal...for now though," the pegasus said, stepping closer to him, that smug smile disappearing as his snout pressed firmly against my Father's. "Where's the kid?"

"She's at school." my Dad said, trying his best to put up a brave front, but he was no fighter.

Neither was my Mother apparently, though that wasn't much of a surprise to anyone that knew her. She had that classic Mom-rage if someone messed with her foals (we would always be her 'little foals', obviously), but a gun to your head tended to trump Mom-rage.

"Hah! That's uh, that's...that's a good try, pretty-colt," he said, before his hoof suddenly impacted the side of my Dad's head, sending him sprawling to the ground with a guttural cry. "But you're lyin'. We know she's still here, but it's just such a big house! Figured askin' you'd make it easier on us."

My Dad held a hoof to his head while forcing himself back to his hooves. "You've been watching us?!"

The pegasus shrugged and flitted his wings against his sides. "Gotta make sure you two ain't blabbin', or even worse, your daughter. Pretty sure she got the message though, seein' how she's been doin' nothin' but cowerin' in this here house the past few days."

My Mother simply glared, and the unicorn that accompanied him was just...still as a statue. I couldn't look away from what was happening, the unicorn keeping his distance while the two guns floating in the air pressed against my parents more insistently.

"Now, let's try this again. Where, exactly, is your daughter?"

The unicorn and pegasus waited, and neither of my parents said a single thing. The pegasus sighed and shook his head, suddenly bucking my Dad square in his muzzle. His head snapped back with a bad-sounding crack, and blood gushed from his nose.

There was a resounding bang of a gun throughout the house, that thankfully covered up my very brief and muffled squeal of terror.

I heard my Mother cry out and I snapped my eyes to her just in time to see her collapse to the floor, reaching for her right hindleg. Directly in the center of her cutie mark was a large bullet hole, blood pouring out of it and staining her lighter-colored fur a dark tinge of red. I backed away just a little, eyes wide with a rapidly thought-consuming fear, every inch of my body shaking as if an earthquake were directing itself solely through me and me alone.

The pegasus let out an exaggerated sigh and rubbed a hoof over his muzzle. "Really, Pin? I mean she's got a nice ass for an older mare, didja hafta ruin it?"

The unicorn just rolled his eyes and re-adjusted his aim to keep my Mom in his sights once more. "She moved."

"Right, you're a regular mister No-Bullshit, got it," he said, looking over to my Dad again, who was coughing and trying to deal with his shattered snout. "Think you can be a No-Bullshit kinda stallion now and tell me where your daughter is now?"

"Fuck you! You shot my wife-"

"Yeah, okay. Pin?"

I clenched my eyes shut as two more gunshots went off, and my Dad screamed and fell to the floor, two bullets finding purchase in the knees of both his forelegs. I couldn't help but scream at the sight of my Father crumpled on the floor, crying in agony.

"STOP IT!!"

I knew what had just happened, but I couldn't bring myself to stop. The tears came unbidden, and my sobbing was loud enough to make everyone else fall silent in the foyer. I knew at that moment, they knew exactly where I was...and that I'd seen it all.

I could hear the pegasus flying up to the upper floor at the top of the stairs, landing just next to me. I didn't even try to look at him, cowering on the floor as I was.

"Well! If you didn't want us to do that, you probably shoulda come downstairs and come with us. Kinda your fault, kid."

"H-he made me kill that mare! Her name was Ivy! She had a coltfriend in Las Pegasus she was going t-to move in with, and I-I-"

The pegasus growled and pressed a hoof over my withers. "Hey, calm the fuck down little filly-"

"Get away from me!!" I screamed, and my magic lashed out at him on instinct.

Terror can do a lot to make you fight back like a cornered animal. The burst of raw magic coursing through his foreleg and into the rest of his body was probably more than he was expecting from a small six-year-old like myself.

He juttered and his wings flared in surprise, and when it was over, the shock on his face was evident. His fur was a bit burnt in places, and several feathers had vaporized right off of his wings. It was in that moment that the fear returned, because it hadn't made him back off. No, all I did was really piss him off.

"Oh, you little SHIT!"

That was the last thing I heard before a hard hoof smacked me across the side of my head, right in my temple. I swayed and staggered and spun around in a daze before falling flat on my face, barely able to form a coherent word, let alone take a single stable step away from my assailant.

He didn't stop. With my back to him, I was completely vulnerable, and I felt something hard come down on the top of my head, then on my back, again and again and again. It stopped for only a moment to let the aches in my back begin to well up before a sharp crack and an intolerable, burning agony welled up in my right hindleg.

I screamed and curled in on myself, only to feel that heavy impact of his hoof slam down on my hindleg again, the pain becoming blinding as I screamed a blood-curdling scream that had my parents calling out to me in return. I could barely hear them as he stomped on my hindleg again. He was saying something...he sounded angry. I didn't really make it out amidst what was clearly intense panic and pain.

All I could feel in my hindquarters was the pain throbbing through my right hindleg, all the way up my flanks. The world was tuned out for me, and whatever he was shouting at me I didn't take in. By the time I'd managed to focus enough to hear them downstairs, the thugs had vacated the premises.

The only pony that could move was my Mother, and she immediately called the cops. I felt magic tenderly wrap around me and float me downstairs, but every little movement I made caused the pain in my hindleg to flare up. Soon, all that was left of me was a sobbing mess cradled in my Mother's embrace when the police showed up.

The cover story was simple enough. Home invasion, but we never saw the faces of the attackers, and aside from the bullets they used and the unicorn's telekinesis, there was nothing left in the house for the police to identify them with. We knew who they were, but my Mom instructed me, very clearly, to not say a word, or else they'd do way worse to us.

They had to do surgery to fix my leg, once they got me to the hospital. My hindleg had been shattered, broken in six places, and metal braces and implants were necessary just to get the bones to heal right. Well, as right as was possible. Even to this day, with all the magic I have, I still walk with a distinct limp because of the bones not healing right, and my muscles in my right hindleg not quite working correctly because of it. The odd twist to every step I take as I put my hoof down is fairly obvious.

My Dad never could get full use out of his forelegs like he used to. He complained about spontaneous aches in his knee joints, and he couldn't quite coordinate manipulating more sensitive instruments with his forehooves the way he used to. He was put on painkillers for the rest of his life, unless the random aches and pains decide to stop being a thing out of nowhere.

My Mother got off easy by comparison, the bullet only hit muscle and caused a minor fracture in her hip, which was easily fixed. She was taking care of me while I recovered, restricted to the hospital for over a week and a half before I was allowed to go home. Even then, I was heavily encouraged to stay in bed.

A shame they showed up to take me to their boss again the moment I got home.

My parents put up no resistance. They had none left, though they wanted to fight and thrash and rebel against my fate with reckless abandon, if only to spare me from it for a moment longer. If I had been smarter, I would've realized at the time that there was little they could do. I was just a naive kid though. I felt betrayed as they told me to go with that terrifying pegasus and the stoic, but violent unicorn.

As I was ushered into the carriage, the helplessness I felt began to boil over with a kind of anger reserved for those that have faced true injustice in their lives. I think that was when I began to plan...or when my plans began to consume me, when I wasn't busy with my studies.

Chapter 2 - Growing Up

Chapter 2 - Growing Up

written by Fire Soul

There was no way out of what was required of me. I knew my place after that second time. It was a pegasus that time, and she struggled even more than Ivy did. I think her name was...Cloud-something? Cloud Caller? That sounds right, but when I try to think back, some memories are more vague than others. I never forgot my first kill though. I never forgot the look on her face in that final moment.

When my brother heard about the 'home invasion', I think he firmly set himself on his path right there and then. Already gifted in defensive magicks and being so pre-disposed to good health and a strong, sturdy build, becoming a member of the Royal Guard was pretty much the best option for him. That or some kind of Mafia enforcer or whatever, but my brother's got too much of a righteous heart for that life.

Myself, however...I was trapped in a place I didn't want to be, and the longer I was stuck there, the more I plotted and planned. Every cold-blooded murder I conducted on a captive pony gave me more insight on how to tweak and adjust the spell, and I purposely limited the information I gave to him in some vague hope that I actually gave him just enough that he didn't catch another pony.

That was my life until I was twelve. The Magister decided that he no longer needed my help. I didn't have any complaints, of course, why would I? Maybe I got a taste for it, sure, I was raised on it. I was conditioned for it. But did I ever want to do it, to ponies that I had no quarrel with? No.

But as time went on...maybe I did. I remember a lot of them. They did their own share of disgusting, despicable things. I remember a stallion who extorted a fledgling family business to the point of bankruptcy. When they could no longer pay protection, the Mafia took ownership of the place and got rid of them.

Then there were victims like that maid. They hadn't even taken her out of her uniform! Try as I might to justify her death, she hadn't done a single thing wrong outside of swiping an expensive piece of jewelry from some noble's collection. That definitely wasn't what she was sitting in the chair for though. I can only assume they thought she knew something they wanted. They never told me.

I can't even remember her name. Just another death to scar my soul and my psyche.

I always played the timid, thoroughly cowed young filly. I only did what I was told, never asked questions, but when I went home I planned. Numerous writings, hidden away through concealing spells and dark hiding places in my room and down in the basement. I spent all of my free time reading, studying magic, experimenting with it and further perfecting my mind magic on animals and bad ponies alike. No one ever saw me, no one ever suspected me.

It's difficult to point a hoof at someone if you don't even realize someone's fucked with your head.

I never talked to my parents about what they made me do. They simply accepted that there was nothing they could do about it, and that I didn't want to talk to them about it. Even if I had a taste for it now, that didn't mean I wanted them to know that I knew dark magic. Dangerous dark magic, in hindsight. Nor did I want them to know that I was still practicing it after the Magister decided that my services weren't required.

I think the only reason I didn't suffer an 'unfortunate accident' was because of my big brother, and the fact that my Father worked at the castle. My brother was getting a lot of attention for being such a devoted guard, and ever since we'd all gotten attacked like that, there was something missing between my parents. Mom was hardly around as much as she used to be, same with Dad, both of them throwing themselves into their work.

Fortunately, in their absence, I still had Shiny there to keep me company, as well as a nice fancy laboratory all my own down in the basement, where I could conduct all of my magical and alchemical experiments in peace. With their debt repaid to the Mafia (a rare thing mind you), my parents could afford a lot more, and since my grades almost instantly improved in school, my parents were happy to fund any personal studies I wished to pursue.

Now mind you, this mind magic insanity wasn't the only thing that was required of me. I had several other tasks, like going to 'visit family in insert city name here' while actually carrying a package of who-knows-what in my saddlebags. Personally I think it's a miracle no one ever caught me that one time the package opened up in my saddlebags and I got a whiff of the cocaine when I went to pull it out. Tell you what, I was hyper for the rest of the day! Thought my heart was going to explode.

The buyer kinda kicked my ass for trying out his product, albeit on accident. Then he laughed at how high-strung I looked, all disheveled, mane sticking out all over the place, horn sparking with random zaps of magic and whatnot. I slept like a log when I got home.

This was the main reason my grades suffered so much: having to leave the city as often as I did. That must've been quite the sight, a young filly carrying drugs and who knows what else on the train, while also desperately studying and working on a week's backlog of homework and schoolwork in hopes of catching up and getting at least a passing grade.

My teachers were certainly concerned when I suddenly went from model student to the 'bad filly' that almost never got her work done (on time at least) and never associated with anyone. I didn't want my friends asking questions. Especially ponies like Moondancer. She was a smart filly that deserved every chance she could get to become a Magus like she wanted. At least she had a better idea for her future than I did.

Of course, once I had all that time to myself to become a model student and straighten my life out - hah! - I could finally get to work on my real projects in earnest.

Now, all of this might sound really mature for a twelve-year-old. That's because it is, but then, I'm a smart filly. At the time I never thought much on it, but it really was, even for a filly as intelligent as me. I'm fairly sure it had to do with the dark magic I'd been using, and the dark magic I continued to use despite not needing to anymore. I had to perfect it. I had to make it better than just being some kind of doom-hammer I brought down on the vulnerable minds of my lesser victims.

I constructed a very special, very hidden room for such purposes. Masquerading as a summoning chamber, I used it to store and experiment on random members of the Mafia I managed to get my hooves on, either through seduction or, as I got more experienced, less shameful means.

Yes, seduction. If you had half the sexually explicit memories I'd taken in, you'd be pretty well-versed in nabbing a pussy-hungry young stallion or three too! Or, you know, cock-starved mares, whatever. Just fiddle with their heads a bit, appear a bit older than I actually was, and the rest was body language and biology.

Of course I indulged here and there. Memories can't substitute for personal experience very well, so of course after hitting puberty and making it through my first estrus, I got plenty curious and horny. You know what they say: young, dumb, and full of cum.

It could've had something to do with me being born a hermaphrodite; not exactly a common thing, but certainly not rare either. Uncommon, let's go with that. In most societies, hermaphrodites are extremely rare, due to genetic quirks and whatnot. Pony society though? We're saturated in magic, and if there's anything you can say about magic, it's one Tartarus of a thing.

Not to say that hermaphrodites make up a drastically larger population in Equestria, of course not. Just slightly so, and usually hermaphroditic traits only happen in ponies that have particularly large reservoirs of magic in them, but that's the tendency and not a strict rule. Bright side? Both sets of genitalia are fully functional!

Downside? We're horny sons of bitches. Like, really horny. I actually take suppressants to keep my libido in check. Not saying I'd be some kind of sex-crazed maniac without them, but uh...hm. Imagine getting a boner twenty times a day because no matter how much you try, sex always worms into your thoughts. It's really distracting and particularly embarrassing in public!

That was why my parents always made me wear clothes, they didn't want anypony knowing. I didn't understand why until I was older and I began to get involved with the nobility and their stupid power games. I don't exactly fit into their strict criteria of being either a mare or a stallion, and the knowledge of how sexual we can be offends their hoity-toity and reserved sensibilities. You know, among a slew of other things, but it basically boils down to 'eew, freaks of nature, we can't be seen associating with that THING!'

So as far as anyone outside of my family knows, I am Lady Twilight Sparkle, heiress of House Sparkle and blah blah, numerous other titles. Stupid noble bullshit, you get the idea.

Still kinda fucked up I lost my virginity, all three ways, by the time I was thirteen. I'm aware of that. I was very eager to experiment.

Anyways, things changed drastically when I was thirteen. New magic incidents began to crop up on the streets, houses going up in flames, bursts of lightning...the unicorns working for the Mafia were becoming much more active. This had me concerned, and it clearly had the Royal Guard and the police concerned as well, but compared to the kind of presence the Mafia had, there was little the police could do. The Royal Guard were content to leave it alone as long as it stayed away from the castle, and I think the Mafia knew that.

I didn't like what was happening in the least. Magic I didn't have access to? Magic I couldn't prepare for? That was unacceptable, but there was little I could do about it. I had an idea, but all I could do was fill out an application and wait. In the meantime, things got very busy for me.

Contacts, associates and ponies who knew I was pretty smart came to me for advice and ideas sometimes when they were having problems, and I built myself quite the unofficial crew, especially for my age. I kept my distance, of course. My plans could not start in Canterlot, but my options were rapidly becoming limited the more apparent this abuse of increasingly more dangerous magic became.

Canterlot was rapidly becoming a very dangerous city.

I picked up a smoking habit this same year. Expensive taste, flavored cigars, usually a smoky cherry scent and flavor to them. I didn't smoke them very often, but I always kept them around if I just wanted to relax and kick back for an evening, let my mind and body rest for once. Better than the acrid, nostril-searing stench of cigarettes.

My plans were at a standstill until I could figure out the solution to my problem, but all I had was the application I sent in to Celestia's School for Gifted Unicorns. Fortunately, my brother brought home something beneficial to my long-term plans: Princess Cadance.

She was as sweet and saccharine as any mare could possibly be, and beyond beautiful, prim and proper and just as pure-hearted as my brother seemed to be. That dark and twisted part of me felt like choking on all that sugary goodness she seemed to glow with, but a larger part of me felt happy for my big brother. At least someone in the family was happy.

Did I mention she was an alicorn? Right, should've mentioned that. She was an alicorn! There we go.

I didn't dare try to use my magic on her. For one, I had no reason to, and beyond that, she was an alicorn. Who knew what she was capable of? She had some strange kind of love magic that I swear borderlined on being brainwashing or mind control, it was legitimately creepy. She better not have ever used it on me.

But, she did provide me with an opportunity. I just needed to get in good with her. That was surprisingly easy, all things considered. She was easy to get along with, and despite how regal she appeared to be, she was a child at heart. A few fun games, pretending to be the adolescent teenager I was, despite my immense maturity and loner behavior...it was easy. She even started to call me Ladybug because of a silly old tune that I found so absurd it was hilarious.

I even did the dance with her. At thirteen. Sweet Celestia, what was I thinking?

In any case, my brother mentioned my application to her, and once I had her interest, she asked to see my lab. I had made sure to go downstairs and secure my more questionable assets before this even came up with every visit, and given how often she found me busy with my studies, she began to feel that perhaps my application deserved a little priority. That had to have been the case, it only took a month before I got a letter notifying me of the acceptance of my application, and the time of my competency test three days later.

My plans began anew. Looking back, my initial plans weren't all that important outside of establishing a false personality for myself. I was the broken young mare that would distance herself from the Mafia as much as she could, because they scared her so much. I had to be terrified of them, I'd never dare to do anything to turn against them! I'm too crippled with my bad hindleg to ever be a threat.

They shouldn't have fucked with me.

Of course, away from the streets I was merely Twilight Sparkle, the confident smart young mare, friendly enough but a bit too into my books and studies to have time for friends and the like, though I did seem to have a bit of a bleeding heart for the downtrodden in the less fortunate areas of Canterlot.

The day of my competency test was a joke. Keep in mind that this school doesn't judge based on your age, if your application is accepted it's likely because you've proven to have the drive and ambition through your previous grades, tests and actions needed to make it through this school's rigorous requirements. Every test was well within my skills, each test I passed was done with a confident calm, to prove that not only was I good, I knew I was good. That is, until they brought forth the final test.

A dragon's egg. That was truly a surprise. Knowledge of dragons was limited at best, and what was known was thoroughly restricted. Tensions with the dragons were bad enough without ponies going hunting for dragon eggs in dragon territory because of how valuable they are, or dragon scales or who knows what else.

I was shocked when they told me to hatch it. Not try to hatch it, just you know, do it. We may not know a lot about dragons, but we definitely do know that a large amount of magic was necessary in order to make a dragon's egg hatch. So, lacking any idea as to spells I could use to speed along the process or manipulate the egg in a way that would make the process go faster, I began to feed my magic directly into it.

I sat there for several minutes, letting my magic freely flow into the egg, but after a solid ten minutes of trying to twist my magic around and alter the way it flowed into the egg, there was no sign of any sort of significant change. I was beginning to feel just a bit winded. The judges questioned what I was doing, and I explained it to them simply enough. They nodded, but also looked down their snouts at me while scribbling a few things down on their clipboards. Condescending pricks...

Soon I was panting while increasing the flow, and signs of concern from the judges were becoming ever more apparent to me the longer I kept at it, but I refused to quit. Nothing and no one defeats Twilight Sparkle! Soon my horn was billowing with the intensity of a triple-corona, and my magic began to flood the egg and then some, jolts of raw power sparking into the air while the judges themselves stood up from their seats. They seemed intimidated by the raw mana making the room itself tingle.

Then my magic ran out, and I collapsed in exhaustion. I cringed as my body ached, and I forced myself to my hooves and tried as hard as I could to spark my horn again. The judges warned me to stop, saying I will hurt myself if I go any further. I didn't listen.

There was something deep down, something I could feel, but I couldn't quite reach. I'd never noticed it before because I'd never pushed myself this far. I reached, clawed for it with my mind, and just as I was about to give up and surrender to the outcome of this test...it poured into me, and out of me.

What happened next was fuzzy to me. I remember getting overwhelmed, and my horn burning white-hot with pure, untamed magic. After that it was nothing but white, and the pony I was ceased to exist in my mind. There was only magic, only power overwhelming.

It all ended when a voice reached my fading consciousness, pulling me back to the surface and getting my rampant magic under control. I felt that massive reservoir settle deep inside of me, and once I had the time later, it would become apparent that there was far more magic in me than I'd ever previously expected. I did a cursory check to make sure my clothes had survived whatever had just happened, then looked forward when I heard that voice speak once more.

"Are you alright, young mare?"

My eyes widened in recognition of the tall pony standing before me, and I immediately bowed before the Princess of the Sun. I felt small in that moment, and ashamed of losing control of my magic in such a childish way. Magical mishaps were the sort of thing you left behind in your filly years!

"Please, rise! Take a moment to collect yourself," she said to me, and I did as I was told. I may not like taking orders from anyone, but you don't fuck with the Princess. "You have been through quite an ordeal."

I glanced around the room while steadying myself, the intense ache in my right hindleg throwing off my balance a little while I turned to examine the judges, who all seemed confused and dazed. Good thing my parents couldn't come. I did notice Cadance in the doorway leading in and out of the room, looking at me with some concern.

Then I saw the egg. The hatched egg that laid in pieces all around the cart it had been wheeled in on, with a baby dragon sitting there sucking on his tail. Even I couldn't hold back an 'aww' at the sight of it, and apparently Celestia couldn't resist picking him up in her magic. He seemed utterly fearless as he giggled and cooed and actually made grabby-claws for me, which I thought strange until later.

"I-I...I succeeded?" I asked, the words barely above a whisper as they left my mouth.

"Indeed you did. Something no pony has ever done before. You should be proud! However," she said to me, placing a gold-covered hoof on my wither. I stiffened at the contact. "I fear you lack proper control, a strange issue for your age. Tell me...what caused this flux of power that rushed out of you?"

I told her as much as I could about it. I felt like there was no way to not tell her! There was just something compelling about her smile and her presence, the dulcet tones of her voice...I could listen to her speak all day long, if I were ever given the option. By the time I was finished, she was looking down at me with a sympathetic smile.

"That, my dear, sounds like a mental block, and a particularly strong one at that, if it held your magic back. Such things are usually caused by trauma...something to do with that bad hindleg of yours, I'm guessing."

I didn't even question how she knew. I was wearing pants, none of the scars on my leg were visible, so it definitely wasn't that!

She stood tall and smiled down at me, gently placing the baby dragon on her back with her magic, her gaze turning to the judges with a silent question. The four of them gave her a simple nod, and she returned it without hesitation. I looked between them with just my eyes, that tension in my body encouraging me not to move my head.

"Anypony who has such courage and determination to face a mental block of such magnitude and overcome it is worthy of my school. However, I see a potential in you," she said to me, and my breath hitched. What was that supposed to mean? "From this day forth, you shall become my student, if you so wish it. Do you accept?"

My stomach did several flips, the silence in the room reaching a fever pitch of utter stillness that would've made the drop of a pin more audible than the short breaths I'd been letting out. Was she serious? Was this really happening?!

I felt something in myself that I hadn't felt in years, a genuine welling giddiness that made me start hopping in place, and soon, the young filly Twilight Sparkle that had been forgotten so long ago made a surprise appearance...much to my eternal embarrassment.

"YEEEESSSS!! Yes yes yes yes yes-" I shouted over and over with an overwhelming joy, hopping in a circle around the Princess in a blatant display of what most nobles would consider utter disrespect.

I didn't care. I was in! Even more than that, I was the Princess's student!

Even she was laughing at my behavior, I recall. So was the little baby dragon crawling and hopping after me, babbling in his nonsensical baby-speak. Celestia hadn't even noticed he'd hopped off of her back!

When I stopped, finally taking notice of my own ridiculous behavior, my face lit up bright red and for a brief moment I wished I could just melt into the floor and disappear. Then I felt tiny claws pricking at my skin as something climbed up on my butt, then crawled up onto my back. I snapped my head around and saw the baby dragon crawling onto me and, not sure what he had planned, I shrieked a little and slopped onto my rump, making him stumble and slide down my back. He was giggling all the way.

"It seems he's rather attached to you. Most likely mana-induced imprinting," Celestia said, grinning and gently stroking a hoof over the small dull spines on his head. "You are, in essence, his Mother. You did not lay his egg, but you did hatch him with your magic. That's what matters most to dragons."

Oh. Okay. So I was a Mother at thirteen. I made a mental note to have a field day with that news, when I broke it to my parents and brother. I'd just have to get Cadance in on the joke...well, sort-of-joke. It was technically true.

I could practically feel the hairs in my mane springing up from the welling panic inside of me.

Celestia beat my panic attack to the punch. "Don't worry yourself too much! Help will be made available, and I'm sure your parents are willing to assist you."

That calmed me down somewhat. The Princess of the entire freakin' country promising to help you raise your spontaneous dragon-baby by way of her numerous near-infinite resources at her disposal is enough to calm any single parent down. I took a few deep breaths and let them out slowly, even as those little claws pricked their way up my back and took hold around the base of my neck.

"For now though, I believe you should go home and rest! I would be shocked if you weren't at least somewhat exhausted from what you've been through."

I nodded my agreement as Cadance came in to congratulate me. Admittedly, I was feeling very light-headed and out of it, and despite the pleasantries from the Princess herself, a bed sounded like the most wonderful thing right now. With a simple bow and a proper goodbye, Cadance walked me out of the castle to my carriage, riding home with me and my new baby dragon.

A baby. Oh boy. This required a lot of thought on my part, not to mention my upcoming future as the Princess's protege. Cadance was utterly delighted, squee'ing at the baby dragon cuddled up to my side and making little googly faces at him. I couldn't help but smile...he really was adorable. No different from a pony foal in a lot of ways.

"Sooooo..." she said, in that conspiratorial tone that I recognized as the tone of child-like mischief from her. "How're you gonna break the news to your family?"

I knew her well enough to know that she had something devious in mind, and it seemed like we were on the same wavelength this time around.

"I'm planning to do it in a way that could potentially result in my brother, my Father, or both fainting like timid little fillies, of course!"

Chapter 3 - Single Parent

Chapter 3 - Single Parent

written by Fire Soul

Raising a baby dragon wasn't actually as difficult as I thought it would be. No doubt it would've been easier if I hadn't been up to morally reprehensible things, but my plan was what mattered above all else, in my mind. Still, there was no way to not re-assess my priorities in terms of keeping him fed, keeping him occupied in a safe area of my laboratory, and preferably not exposing him to my cigar habits.

I really should've been more rattled by this, especially since when I got undressed that first night and went to brush my teeth, I saw plain as day in the mirror that I'd gotten my cutie mark. It was always a point of embarrassment for me, growing up. I should've had that thing a lot sooner, but then, before now I didn't have the time I would've liked to really show my magical prowess off. Nor did I have much time to practice what I loved so very much, even more than I loved the idea of getting the revenge I so craved.

You wanna get Twilight Sparkle wet? Bring her a secret rare book full of spells the world hasn't seen in ages. She'll soak the floor.

Anyways, it was actually not that difficult. He seemed perfectly capable of entertaining himself most of the time, though I did have to scold him for gnawing on some of my more valuable spell books. I quickly learned not to leave anything valuable lying around, because his teeth were and still are extremely sturdy and sharp. They have to be, one of his main dietary supplements is raw minerals, like limestone. Dragons need them in order to build bones more solid than some lesser metals.

Had to learn how to change diapers though, and oh wow, I was not ready to be a Mom! That had to have been the most disgusting stench that I've ever gotten a whiff of, and mind you, I used to wait in back alleys for packages next to piles of garbage over three weeks old! That is saying something.

Then again maybe dragon shit is just more rotten than pony shit. I wouldn't really know.

I actually got pretty good at manipulating my own senses with what I'd learned of mind magic because of it, because otherwise I probably would've thrown up a whole lot more. It was still disgusting, don't get me wrong, but being able to shut your sense of smell off temporarily is really useful when you're on diaper duty.

Cadance made a point of stopping in to help me out a lot, which surprised me since, you know, Princess. Turned out that a babysitter for Spike (that's the name I went with for him) was entirely necessary due to my new studies with Princess Celestia, because with how inquisitive and attracted to shiny valuable things he was, I feared the idea of him committing the grave sin of teething Princess Celestia's golden shoes, or even worse, her crown.

The lessons themselves were very unconventional. Some of them I didn't truly understand, with how different they were. Some days I studied advanced magical theory, other days she put me through practical application of the spells I learned. Then, there were the strange days where we simply sat and talked over tea. Those days were shorter than most, but I did at least develop an appreciation for darjeeling.

It certainly didn't help that I didn't have a whole lot to talk about. If it wasn't about magic, I didn't know much about it, though I did have quite a propensity for learning that she gladly indulged. She seemed to enjoy the input of an outsider, someone not involved in the proceedings of her legal dealings, or the politics each of her days were filled with. Of course, I had other things to talk about, but if I talked about them, I'm fairly sure she would've had me thrown in jail, so I continued to play the role of the fairly innocent, sheltered young mare.

Those calm moments of conversation between us actually satisfied me more than the studies, after a while. Eventually instead of discussing work, she began to tell me stories of ages long past. No national secrets of course, but she had plenty of amusing tales of old friends and ponies that once planned to overthrow her or just discredit her...various things. Sitting pretty at the top tended to earn the often impotent ire of those below her station.

Of course, that closeness brought a different kind of problem for me. Namely, Celestia's inquiries as to why I always wear clothes. Pants, specifically. It's normal for ponies to wear clothes around their barrel, maybe some accessories or perhaps a dress if they must cover their whole body, but it was unusual to see a mare wearing full-body clothes every day. At first she was content with me saying that I've always worn clothes like this, it's just what I do. Then I made the mistake I used to make when I was a little child: I got way too into my studies.

It was a heavy, long-term project that, as always, I felt the need to do my very best on. I've always been that way, and even Spike, at only a year and a half old, seemed to know me well enough to realize that I needed to focus. He was trying to walk upright by now, but he often defaulted to flopping down onto his hands and feet and waddling around quick as a whip. I swear, he almost looked like a dog, it was adorable!

I kept him entertained during my more in-depth studies by pointing to things I needed that he could reach, and he would go pick them up and bring them to me. I could've used my magic, but he found such delight in helping me that I didn't have the heart to stop. It became a regular thing between us, after a while. Celestia told me this had something to do with the imprinting, most dragon hatchlings showed a severe devotion to their Mother figure, always seeking ways to please her. It was only natural.

I was just barely fifteen when it happened. I had been so heavily buried in my studies that I didn't realize how low I was running on my suppressants. I had three days left and I figured I could just work through it, but you have to understand...I see Princess Celestia every day, and need I remind you that us hermaphrodites are horny sons of bitches?

Of course I had dirty thoughts about the Princess, despite all those superstitions about how you'll never reach the Elysium Fields if you have dirty fantasies about the Princess of the Sun. Or was it something about your dick falling off? It was bullshit to me, so I ignored it for the most part. Now I'm walking alongside her, looking up at her, talking with her like a close acquaintance, all alone in her private chambers...

Have you seen the flank on that mare?! Sweet HER, I don't know what wizardry she employs to keep such a perfectly sculpted figure, but damn! I mean she eats a lot of cake, how does it all go to her ass until it's just the most perfect, round, plush shape to hypnotize mares and stallions alike?! That had to have been how she really brought the three tribes together, she just waggled her perfect butt at them until they were in her thrall.

Anyways my point is, I was off my suppressants the next day, mentally fatigued from a lack of decent sleep and constant studying, and Celestia was facing away from me standing on her balcony basking in her sun because of course that perfect flank had to be pointing in my direction at just the right angle! Sometimes if the sunlight shines on her just right she looks like a porcelain statue in motion.

I've noticed her before. How could I not? But other times, I had a bottle of my suppressants in my pocket. I could slip away and take one on a rough day. That day, I had zero on me. Nada. So when I felt a certain tension in my loins, there was little I could do about it other than sit down and try not to look suspicious as I shuffled my forelegs around to cover up my crotch and hopefully hide it from a pony much taller than me.

Obviously, when we settled in for tea as we usually do, I did not succeed in seeming completely casual.

"You are behaving strangely, Twilight. Is everything okay?"

I genuinely had no idea how to respond to that. Feeling my sheath swelling in my pants was doing nothing to fix that. I realized the position I was sitting in at the table was rather awkward, back straight, forelegs together and standing taut, the tension in my body clearly uncomfortable yet I refused to change my position in any way...and it had been around ten minutes of idle conversation by now.

"A-ah, am I?" I asked with the most innocent tone I could muster, inwardly cursing my nervous stutter. "I hadn't noticed."

"You stumbled over your words. That's not exactly something you do," she said, her golden aura going to work on the tea set in front of us, the familiar clatter of fine Chineigh filling the room as she shifted our teacups around. "You tend to be much more eloquent."

I wobbled in my very proper posture, the soreness of the position making it tempting to let my body relax just a bit, but the position also offered me protection from eternal shame and likely the infinite awkwardness of popping a boner in front of this magnificent mare with her sparkling eyes and beautiful ethereal mane, and it's really hard to stop when you're used to being on suppressants, okay?!

Apparently I'd been a bit too quiet for a bit too long, and the slight sway in my posture caught her attention. That calm and friendly demeanor of hers suddenly shifted to concern while I sat there, staring at her like I were staring up at a hydra. Oh I tried to hide my rising panic, I tried so hard, but I'm pretty sure she spotted the tremor in my lips and the lack of motion in my ears. I was the very visage of an alarmed pony.

"Twilight?" I heard her say, just as I began to swallow the lump in my throat. "What's wrong? You look like you're terrified."

"I'm fine! Really, I'm...I'm fine," I struggled to say, taking a deep breath and letting it out nice and slow. "Just tense, lately. Lots of studying to get done, heh, you know how I can be!"

She visibly relaxed when I spoke up, her magic grasping the tea pot and heating the water inside, a single tea ball being filled with fresh tea leaves before being placed inside of the kettle. My eyes followed that beautiful magical glow as she set the top on the kettle again with a satisfying and light clink. She had such lovely and radiant magic...I wondered what it would be like to run my tongue over her horn while she channeled it-

I felt my stallionhood begin to slip up and out of my pants, and it took every ounce of my willpower to restrain the pleasurable shiver as the head of my shaft slid over form-fitting fabric. Perhaps wearing a belt from now on would be a better idea than simply getting my clothes custom-fit.

"Of course! I would imagine taking care of Spike is very time-consuming as well," she said in that warm and pleasant tone that you could only count yourself lucky to have in your life every day. "He's two, going on three years old now, I believe? You should bring him along sometime, I haven't seen him in months."

"Oh! Uh yeah, sure-I-I mean yes, Princess," I said, while silently berating my lack of self-control. "I'll bring him along next time. He should really see you more often!"

I could not be screwing this up worse, short of jumping on the table, tearing my clothes off and doing a stripper dance while smacking her in the face with my stallionhood. Admittedly the more masculine side of me delighted in such a show of supreme disrespect, sort of like the ultimate taboo that would probably result in me getting locked in the dungeons forever, but oh, what a way to go!

I had gotten so lost in that mental cinema snippet that I hadn't realized Celestia's smile had faded once more. I only noticed her making any sort of movement when I heard the distinct and familiar clink of her teacup being set down on its saucer once more. She was looking at me with that heartwarming expression of concern that had me fidgeting on the inside.

The sudden realization of why I was being like this came to me like a lightning bolt straight through my horn: withdrawal. I've been taking suppressants since I was twelve. My parents disapproved of me going on suppressants at such a young age, but I just hated how distracting my suddenly fluctuating hormones were! Estrus was bad enough without having the strange, undeniable desire to somehow do the impossible and fuck myself. Now I suddenly have these strange urges distracting me when I'm just walking down the street, pony-watching?! Screw that!

I had been taking those things every single day, multiple times a day. Now suddenly, I had none, and these things aren't designed for slow release. You take them, they dissipate into your bloodstream, and they keep your libido under control through your hormones. Specifically, they suppress the release of hormones into your body and...well, that's all you really need to know.

My body was used to them, and now I didn't have any. It was making up for it with a vengeance. I vaguely noticed how much I began to sweat, almost as if I was in heat, but I did at least know the side-effects of withdrawal from suppressants enough to know that an artificial heat can happen to mares. Or hermaphrodites.

"Twilight, something is wrong with you," she said to me suddenly, snapping me to attention in more ways than one. "Please, talk to me. Are you okay?"

"I-I'm...fine! Totally fine," I said, feeling the warmth in my body rise as my pulse became audible in my ears. "I'm just hot."

"Well, why don't you remove your clothes then? The suit is nice, but dark clothes tend to absorb heat."

"Ah-ha, no no, it's fine, I just...I just need a moment! Maybe it was the tea."

"Those are flimsy lies, and very unbecoming of you," she said with some mirth to her tone. "You have never had any reason to be dishonest with me before."

Okay, that one dug deep. It had never been brought up, but I was certainly keeping a lot from her, a lot more than just my gender. Then again, she never really asked, to her I was clearly a mare, I certainly look like it on the outside.

The only upside to this was that an artificial heat doesn't put out pheromones that notify other ponies 'hey my body would SO like all the foals put in it right now', so she wasn't picking up on that particular scent. Nor was I ovulating. But that was probably because she was sitting across from me and not next to me...which she was quickly changing oh sweet Celestia I'm so getting banished.

She had stood up from her seat, and the world seemed to be moving in slow-motion as Celestia walked around the table. I could almost feel my pupils dilate in raw terror as she moved to sit down next to me. She hadn't seen it yet, but it was only a matter of time, and I reflexively slouched to try, in vain, to hide it better. By now it was really sticking out, and obvious.

Unfortunately, Celestia was a self-trained bleeding heart extraordinaire and, upon perceiving that I was afraid and hiding something from her, she did what she did best and rested a hoof on my wither, lowering herself down so we could be more eye-to-eye.

"Twilight, please, you are a friend. You can open up to me about anything," she said, looking me over to try to figure out why I seemed so out-of-sorts. "You're practically shaking like a leaf, and you look like you're burning up. Is it-"

The world went still, and the room went silent as her eyes went wide. I could see it out of the corner of my eye. She had seen it, she had noticed, aaand there was the freak-out. Mind you it was a small freak-out, she was very much in control of herself, buuut it would be a shock to anyone that thought me purely a mare.

"That's...Twilight!" she said, quickly averting her eyes, though some part of me took a small delight in the faint blush on her cheeks. Downside of a pure white coat of fur, methinks! "You hid this from me?!"

"I-I'm off my suppressants!" I blurted out suddenly.

Oh yeah. So smooth.

Everything went quiet again. Even with the carpeting, plush as it was, I'm sure you could've heard a pin drop onto it. I had a feeling Celestia knew what I was getting at, and she immediately backed off, moving a short distance away from me. I was thankful for that...I don't think she realized how intoxicating her scent was to a herm going through an artificial heat.

Then again, maybe I was wrong. She knew what suppressants were, and judging by the look on her face, she disapproved in some way.

"I see. Why are you off your suppressants?"

I ran my hoof over my mane, taking a deep breath to calm myself. "I got caught up in my studies, didn't realize I'd run out, then figured I could make it a day or two without them. I hadn't thought about the withdrawal effects, however."

The quiet laugh Celestia let slip made me blush more. "And, well, you know...very attractive mare in the room, uncontrolled hormones, kinda can't help myself..."

"How very you, Twilight! I'll take that as a compliment," she said, moving to sit on the opposite side of the table again, if only for our mutual comfort. "Leave it to my student to get so wrapped up in her assignments that she forgets to keep one of her personal necessities stocked! Honestly, I'm surprised you have any pudge on you, with how often you must forget to buy food."

"Hey!"

Her horn lit up for a brief moment, the sensation of magic jolting through the room before a small bell dinged inside of the chamber doors. I was familiar with it, it was how she summoned somepony to her chambers, be it a maid or her personal assistant. Of course, that realization came with a realization just as horrifying: she called somepony else to her chambers. While I was still there. With a raging boner that was throbbing against my barrel!

"Wait, I can't...don't tell anyone! If the nobles found out-" I started to say, but she quickly held up a hoof to silence me. I clapped my jaw shut.

"Ah, that must be why you hid it from me. Don't worry, Twilight. Swirling Breeze is my most trusted assistant here at the castle. If I ask her not to speak a word about what she sees in here, she will honor that request," she said, taking a sip of her tea using her magic. "She will maintain silence on this matter. Trust me!"

I knew of Swirling Breeze, of course. A much older unicorn mare, soft-built with a light teal mane and an equally light blue coat of fur. She had the most curious eyes I'd ever seen outside of more innocent fillies and colts closer to my age. Given she was twenty-five, over ten years older than me, it was surprising to see such eagerness in her. Nice eye-candy, though I tried not to ogle her when the Princess was around.

Strange name for a unicorn though. More of a pegasus name. Could have something to do with the fact that both her parents were pegasi.

The mare entered a few minutes later, vaguely out of breath from rushing over from whatever she was doing previously. She looked between us for a moment before fixing her posture and walking forward with that proud Canterlotian gait that made it look as if the very ground offended her sense of smell. Of course, that was a total farce when it came to her, she was a middle-class mare from New Yoke that, thanks to a chance encounter after moving here, wound up with one of the more coveted jobs in the castle. Celestia had a habit of choosing ponies from outside the nobility for such roles closely related to her.

"Yes, your majesty?"

Celestia smiled at her, nodding once. "Twilight needs you to go into the city to obtain some hormone suppressants. Make sure to get the top-quality ones available."

Swirling Breeze (I called her Swirly, which made her giggle) looked over to me curiously. "Suppressants? Why-" she began to say, only to notice something thick and dark purple pressed flush against my barrel. Even in my hot and heady state, I laughed at the sudden beet-red blush on her face. "Oh. Oh my. When did this happen?"

I chuckled and shrugged. "Been this way my whole life."

"Huh. Well. Huh," she said, her blush failing to subside as she yanked her gaze back up to meet my own. "I'll be back shortly then."

I'm sure she thought I didn't notice, but she eyed me up in a whole new way as she left the room, and perhaps I was naive to certain social situations, but I knew when I had a mare's attention. I filed that tidbit of knowledge away for later use. It'd been a while for me, and I'd love to have a chance to blow off some steam.

Silence permeated the room once more, and Celestia was sitting there calmly, as she always was, enjoying her tea and pouring herself a second cup. I cleared my throat and took a sip of my own, but my body felt too hot to really be able to enjoy imbibing a hot or warm drink.

"I feel like I should apologize, Princess," I started, nervously licking my lips. "I should've told you sooner. Then maybe I wouldn't be sitting here with...you know."

She waved it off and pulled her cup away from her lips, floating in her magic. "Oh, don't worry about it Twilight! I assure you, it doesn't bother me. If anything, it's flattering!"

"U-uh, what? I don't think I understand."

"Twilight, I assure you that I'm used to this sort of thing," she said, smiling lightly and bringing her cup to her lips once more, taking a sip. "Nothing unusual for my daily life."

I was genuinely confused, and lacking anything else to do, I simply picked up my teacup and took a bigger swig of my tea.

"I live in a castle surrounded by trained soldiers that act as my Royal Guard," she said to me. "I'm used to ponies standing at attention in my presence."

She almost got a spit-take out of me. Almost. Instead I just choked on my drink as it slid halfway down my throat. I coughed and gagged and covered my muzzle with my foreleg, fetlock getting soaked with tea while Celestia laughed across the table.

"Hah-hah, gotcha!" she said while pointing a hoof at me, devolving into laughter once again.

I began to laugh as well, in-between my coughing. It had even come out of my nose, I probably looked like a mess! Soon we were both laughing at my situation, and we took to conversation once more as if nothing had been wrong in the first place. I was thankful for that.

Yes, it was odd to have such a close friend in the Princess of Equestria herself. Still, I was glad she was more than just a mentor to me, able to relax and laugh off even the most awkward of situations. Shame she was royalty, I could see myself taking her out for a drink or two as buddies in around a year. Legal at sixteen in Equestria!

Not that that mattered to Swirly, as I soon discovered. She returned with my suppressants within a half-hour, and I took two of them on the spot, washing them down with a fresh cup of tea. It only took a couple minutes for me to feel the intense heat in my body recede, and with my thoughts more under my control and my hormones not raging like a surging undercurrent in my body, I rapidly got my arousal under control. I'd really need to go and crank one out when I got home, but otherwise I was feeling a whole lot better.

"Thank you, Swirling Breeze. If I may request something else from you," Celestia said, glancing over at me for a moment. "I believe I will be cancelling today's lessons with my student, as she seems under the weather and under a lot of pressure to finish her assignment. You have an extra week to finish it by the way, Twilight."

I blinked a few times in confusion and bowed my head to her. "Thank you, Princess."

"It's no problem." she said with that warm smile, before turning her attention back to Swirly. "Anyways, I would like you to escort her back to her home. Take as much time as is required."

Swirly and I exchanged glances, confused by this sudden turn of events, and the request was strange enough, but...wait, was Swirly blushing? Huh. Well then. Apparently she knew something I didn't know.

"Of course, Princess," I said, standing and shuffling in place a little to get things a bit more comfy between my legs now that my arousal had tapered off. "We'll be heading out now then, if that's alright?"

Celestia simply nodded and continued to enjoy her tea while we left. Swirly was oddly quiet, though she did make vague attempts at conversation, and I tried to keep it going as we rode back to my place in a carriage.

"So, you don't really have anywhere to be today, right?" I asked her, recalling the look on her face earlier when she made that unexpected discovery about me.

She shook her head. "No, when the Princess says that, she pretty much means I can take a break for as long as I want. The rest of the day, potentially."

"Oh. Well," I said, brushing my mane around my horn with my hoof. "If you want, you can stick around for a while. I don't often get to entertain guests."

She accepted, long story short. She accepted, and despite having my lessons canceled for the day, I learned some things and got to put them to practical use for the next few hours.

What can I say? I'm a very eager student.

Chapter 4 - Eager Student

written by Fire Soul

In all of my eagerness to bring Swirly inside and, well, work my magic, I'd completely forgotten about the fact that Cadance was there taking care of Spike in my absence.

It was kinda awkward, to be honest. Fortunately, I'd become really good at lying.

Cadance's guards greeted us at the front door, and there was one other on the inside: my BBBFF. That didn't really surprise me after seeing the guards outside, but I think Swirly felt a little out-of-place, being my guest and all.

We found both Shining and Cadance up in Spike's room, something I was more than happy to furnish with all of his favorite things. The newest Superpony action figures, a little squid plushie he loved to stack in a pile with several other plushies of various animals like his own little cotton-stuffed hoard...I'm sure he would've had a hoard of comics too, if he were old enough to know how to read. I mean he was getting there, he could talk semi-coherently and he used some big words for his age, but still.

Currently, he was being held up in the air by a giggling Princess, both forehooves playfully pumping him up and down in the air while he laughed and stayed laying face-down atop them. Shining was standing between them and the door, off to the side so he could keep an eye on them as well as the room's entrance. I simply enjoyed Spike's laughter from the doorway, before remembering that I had a guest behind me. I quickly stepped inside and let her in.

Shining looked good in his armor, I had to admit. I didn't see him in it very often, and I totally expected him to look like a dork, but he really made it work! He was still a total dork, but I guess Cadance was into that sort of thing.

I'd caught them making googly-eyes at each other on several occasions when they thought I wasn't watching. I teased him about it incessantly whenever he was around. I wonder if I still have that wig from the last Nightmare Night I used to really mess with him? 'Oh Shining, my DARLING Knight! I cannot deny it any longer! Kiss me, you courageous brute!'

Then I threw my forelegs around his neck and he smacked me upside the head and knocked the wig off. Didn't stop him from blushing though~! Pretty sure Cadance was upset too, but she was blushing even harder than he was.

"Hey, Twily!" Shining said to me, that infectious smile of his sparking one on my face as well. "You're back early. What happened?"

It was at that moment he noticed Swirling Breeze. He knew who she was, he was the Captain of the Guard after all, it'd be a bit odd if he didn't know each of the Princess's attendants. Still, I could see the clear confusion on his face with her being there in the first place.

"Ah-heh...something embarrassing," I tried to say with as straight of a face as I could. "I kiiinda ran out of my suppressants, and then went to my scheduled time with the Princess without factoring in the withdrawal effects."

"She saluted the Princess." Swirly chimed in, much to my mortification.

It only took a few seconds for what Swirly was actually talking about to sink in for him, and shortly after, I could hear Cadance laughing with Spike on her belly. Spike took notice of me almost immediately once he no longer had Cadance's absolute attention, and he hopped off of her and started running over to me.

"Mama Twileh!" he called out to me, his little claws held out towards me, eager to be lifted up on my back.

I didn't deny him. Despite my embarrassment, my son's happiness came first at the moment, and instead of using my magic, I sat down, motioned him closer, and wrapped my forehooves around him when he got close enough. He squealed and flailed a little in my grip as I lifted him up high into the air.

Both Shining and Cadance were laughing at me now. Even Swirly was laughing a little, though I'm fairly sure that was because of my pouty-face rather than my predicament. She probably got her chuckles out when she went to pick up my suppressants.

I put Spike on my back, the little drake nuzzling into my mane and wrapping his short limbs around the sides of my neck. He was such an affectionate little guy, totally willing to give anyone a hug as long as they were nice to me. If they weren't, he tried putting those razor-sharp teeth of his to use.

It was a strange and recent development, one I'd had to take thorough steps to curb as best I could, and that included spankings. There were the more standard punishments, but sometimes he really got a bit of a temper in him, and I needed to make it clear that Mommy disapproved if taking his gems away for a time or removing his 'hoard' from his room didn't get the message across.

Apparently this was sort of a dragon thing, if the books Celestia gave me access to were telling the truth. Dragons could be brutish in how they kept their children in line, even to the point that if a child proved too unruly, they might just eat the poor thing. Obviously I'd never eat Spike, but I guess they have a habit of testing their place in the family hierarchy against each other. Lacking any brothers or sisters to test himself against, Spike's instincts had encouraged him to test himself against me.

I can guarantee that he's learning his place. I suppose the part that bothered me was that this sort of thing started at such an early age. Not to mention, it was kind of unnerving as a natural prey species to have a small dragon that's bitten a chunk or two out of me in the past just waddling up to me, bringing me books a few minutes later after I've practically shouted him down and used my magic to teach him a lesson. If I'm being honest, it felt absolutely awful the first few times, I felt like I was abusing a little puppy that didn't know not to bite at my fetlocks.

He actually roared at me a few times, and it legitimately unnerved me, even though it sounded more like a squeak than a roar. I think it was the shiny sharp teeth being bared at me. I just want him to get past this stage of his life so I don't have to worry about him biting a hole in my neck. He had at least learned that his teeth could really hurt me and other ponies, and he was a nice enough little dragon to stop trying to use them. I think his desire to not hurt anyone overrode his desire to fulfill his instincts. At least, that's what I'd like to believe as his Mother.

I'm sure I had a few scars under my fur from the bite marks he'd left in me those few times, but it was no big deal.

Ah, but I had more important things to be concerned about in that moment. For example, Cadance was still laughing at my misfortune.

"Ah-hah, oh my gosh, did you really Twilight?!" she asked, wiping a tear from one of her eyes with a hoof. "You gave my auntie a fifth-leg salute?!"

Oh sweet Celestia, she actually said that. I couldn't facehoof hard enough.

"Fith leg sahwoot!" I heard from my back.

Of all the things he could learn to say!

"Cadance!" I sharply barked, mostly in surprise and some small amount of amusement...you know, with a healthy dose of indignance. "Look what you did!"

I could hear Swirly snickering off to the side, remaining mostly quiet through all of this. My brother wasn't even trying to hide how much Spike's recent lesson in crude language amused him, and Spike was laughing right along with him, repeating it over and over.

"I'm going to enact my vengeance upon all of you, I swear." I muttered to myself, slowly shaking my head.

Cadance at least was apologetic, while Shining was on the floor laughing. Swirly quickly scolded him for his behavior, considering he was a Royal Guard. Not exactly proper for a guard to be rolling around on the floor in his armor. Actually, they're supposed to be stoic as fuck. He was failing miserably in that regard.

Once that was all over, they questioned why Swirly was there. The answer was simple of course, she'd just escorted me home after that understandably unnerving experience at the castle, and I invited her inside since she was given time off after she did what she was told.

Cadance gave us both a funny look, but she didn't say anything, she just went with it. I didn't bother to push the matter. I kinda had other possibilities on my mind, even with those suppressants in my system. Besides, it's not like I was lying! I fully planned to treat Swirly to some lunch, if she so desired.

Both Cadance and Shining left shortly after that. Really, Cadance did babysitting as a favor to myself as well as my brother, though I'm sure it's because she wanted the D he was hiding away. You know, if she didn't already get some of it already. She wasn't exactly what you'd expect from a Princess. She could be regal and kind and exactly what most would expect, but in reality, outside of that role she plays, she's eager to drink, have fun, party and get to know new ponies. Very easy to get close to if you know how to approach her.

Plus, Cadance was unique compared to Celestia. There were no historical documents about Celestia ascending, and she confirmed, whenever asked, that she was born as an alicorn. She was hesitant to talk about much else (like her parents, much to the consternation of every historian ever), so ponies just learned to kind of live in the now.

Cadance, however, was born a pegasus. No if's, and's or but's about that. Ponies had actually witnessed her mysteriously disappearing for what had seemed like no reason. There was only a mark in the ground in the shape of her cutie mark and nothing else. Then when she returned, descending from the sky, she was a reborn mare, and an alicorn to boot! Of course ponies wanted to know her secret, but she was just as confused and lost as they were. Then Celestia showed up and whisked her away to Canterlot. I think she was...I believe ten at the time? Somewhere around there.

Now it was just me, Swirly, and the adorable Spike nestled in atop my back, yawning and curling himself up to get more comfy. He sure did sleep a lot. Then again, most toddlers did. I had made sure to ask Cadance if Spike had eaten yet, and she said yes, so I supposed he just needed to settle in and doze off before I put him in his crib.

While he got comfy, I invited Swirly to the kitchen for something to drink. Nothing alcoholic of course, it wasn't even noon yet, and I was underage. Besides, I'm pretty sure my Father would geld me if I gave his whiskey to anyone, even an acquaintance from the castle.

Strange that my thoughts immediately jumped to tea before all of that. The Princess was influencing me more than I thought, it really seemed like it was all she drank when I was around.

"So! He's a cute little guy." I heard her say.

I glanced back at Spike and smiled, the sleepy dragon perking up a little when he realized he had someone's attention. As I'd taught him, he calmly lifted an arm and waved at Swirly, before closing his eyes and nestling her head more into the back of my mane.

"Yeah. He's had a rough patch recently, but he's calming down. Dragon instincts and such."

"Seems like he'd be a bit dangerous, what with those sharp teeth."

I bristled a little at that, but didn't let it get to me too much. "I've taught him what's acceptable and what isn't! He knows better than to bite ponies."

"Huh. Guessing you have some experience with those teeth?" she asked, looking around the kitchen for a moment.

Our kitchen was a really simple thing. Nothing about it particularly stood out, at least, not in comparison to the rest of the neighborhood's ridiculously-sized homes. Polished mahogany cabinets and cupboards lined the walls above marblestone countertops, with a single large refrigerator in the corner. Seriously, we had a ridiculous amount of counter space, what the fuck, was this designed to be a party house or something? Enough room to make food for forty or something? We even have one of those islands in there!

I moved over towards the island while my magic floated two cups out of one of the cupboards, while she sat on one of the stools. Couldn't really sit down myself because Spike was on my back, and his claws were being very clingy with my mane.

"Yeah, he's been a little terror here and there, but what can you do? Don't have any scars, he never bit me too hard, so I didn't let it get to me. I just had to be a bit more careful."

I avoided mentioning the rather heated shouting/roaring matches he and I got into...and the few times I swatted him around. Not really a buck or a kick mind you, more like a firm push with my hooves to make it clear how much stronger I was compared to him, but that didn't stop me from feeling absolutely awful about it. I just don't have that dragon mentality. I'm not a fan of abusing kids...even though some nobles think it's the only way to teach their spoiled brats discipline.

"Well that's good," she said, turning a little on her stool to face me better. "Bet he's gotten you a lot of attention with the nobility!"

"Kinda!" I exclaimed, motioning to the cups. "Anything you want to drink?"

"Juice?"

"Sure."

I reached over to the fridge with my magic and pulled out a half-empty bottle of apple juice, and poured both of us a glass. Personally I preferred the cider the Apple Family made, or perhaps the brandy one of their more entrepreneural family members manufactured exclusively with some fresh-picked apples from Apple Family orchards. Still, I suppose some juice was a decent substitute, given the situation.

"I mean, dragons are inherently vicious creatures, even at his age," I said, downing some of my juice. "He's given me quite a few problems. Dragons think and function very differently than us ponies do. For one, they usually hatch in a clutch, if they're well taken care of."

She shifted a little on her seat, taking a sip of her juice as well. "Oh? I recall reading a few things once he'd been hatched, mandatory reading from Celestia and all that, but only the essentials. What to do in emergencies, stuff like that."

"Mmmhmm. Problem is, since he has no siblings to quarrel with, he goes for me instead."

"Yeesh...yeah, sounds rough."

The light sound of snoring from my back made me smile, and I glanced back at the curled-up baby.

"Yeah, but he's mine, and I've learned to love him. Better outcome for him than it is for a lot of newborns," I muttered, setting my cup down. "In any case, I need to put this little guy to bed. It's about time for a nap."

"Alright! I'll just be right here," she told me, swirling her cup idly in her magic. "Take your time. I don't have a kid of my own, but I had to take care of my little sister a lot growing up. I know how it is."

I gave her a quick nod and headed upstairs, taking each step semi-slowly so I didn't jostle Spike around too much. It had become almost reflexive for me to cup his body with my magic when going up the stairs to make sure he didn't fall off. Sure, dragons were hardy creatures, but I still didn't want to drop him for any reason.

Another fun fact about dragons is that their scales are extremely magic-resistant. The first few times I tried to pick him up with my magic, my telekinetic grip just slid off of him like he was coated in oil, or something of equal or greater slippery consistency. A lot of unicorns didn't even have the arcane strength needed to get a good grip on him, my own Mother included. It made him the perfect option for exercising my horn, arguably better than any of the enchanted exercise equipment they have available for the Royal Guard.

He tends to enjoy being bobbed around in the air, though I have to make sure I don't make him sick. Advantage of young dragons: they don't get nauseous very easily, unlike newborn and young foals. Disadvantage: enough jostling can make them spontaneously throw up regardless. First time that happened, I had to go to the hospital to make sure I didn't get any crunched-up gem bits in my eyes. Yes, it's as disgusting as it sounds. I never saw it coming until he was suddenly gurgling, then spewing from over my head. He thought it was hilarious.

I turned on his night-light since his room lacked any proper windows and headed back to the kitchen downstairs. My hindleg protested going up and down the stairs, but it was something I'd just learned to deal with. I had my own painkiller prescription that I chose not to fill as often as I should. Proper daily exercise of the limb and some aspirin usually makes it tolerable. The pain sucks, but pain provides important context.

I took a brief moment to stop in the downstairs bathroom to get a couple aspirin before the ache got too bad, then headed back to the kitchen. She was sitting exactly where she'd been when I'd stepped out, but she'd undone her tie and laid it on the countertop along with unbuttoning her shirt. She dressed like a consummate professional much like myself, minus the pants, but she went for a more dark blue color to contrast with her natural, lighter fur and mane colors.

Personally I liked her better with the top on, but maybe that could be dealt with later.

"Everything alright?" she asked me, glancing at the aspirin floating in my magic.

I shrugged. "Yeah, it's fine. Hindleg's just bothering me. Some days it's fine, other days it's like I don't exercise it at all."

"Right, you usually take a few days a week to spar with the guards, don't you? Celestia's mentioned it before," she said to me, putting her cup down. "Real interesting hobby for a scholar."

"Mmmhmm. Well, not everything I do can just be reading books and doing experiments, unfortunately. Besides, I like to fight."

"Something you picked up when you were younger?"

"Yeah," I muttered, looking over at my cup of juice before pulling it over with my hoof and drinking some more of it down. "I liked wandering around when I was younger, still do. Guess my parents lucked out with the fact that I made an effort to keep my grades decent while I did so, huh?"

It was such an old lie, one that worked pretty much all the time. The teachers may not have approved, but I did my homework and studied in my free time. What exactly did they have to complain about outside of my attendance records? I suppose I was getting really good at telling that lie at any given moment without a hint of falsification, given how many ponies ate it up like cupcakes.

In any case, I popped the aspirin into my mouth and knocked back the rest of my juice, setting my empty glass down on the table while clearing my throat.

"Yeah, I guess so. Rumor has it you really know how to fight though," she said, smirking at me. "I'm guessing you did a little more than just travel?"

I just grinned. "Hey, had to get my love of fighting from somewhere!"

"Taught and raised at the Hard Knock Academy!" she said, reaching over to pat me on my wither. "I am so sorry."

"Eh, it wasn't anything I didn't go out looking for. Besides, plenty of ponies had it worse than me! There was one time..."

I poured myself another glass of juice while trying to think of something to do about my current situation. I wasn't joking when I said that I don't really have guests over. I had a few friends in school, but they distanced themselves from me once I stopped being around often enough to keep up with what was going on with them. Because of that, I had absolutely no idea what to talk about or what to do to properly entertain my very attractive guest.

Still, she seemed very interested in what I had to say. That was a plus, at least. For all of my street-savvy and book-smarts, I really lacked more advanced social skills, especially when it came to flirting. I got as much action as I wanted, mind control is like a social life-hack in that regard, but the idea of using something like that on Swirly just seemed wrong. Well, that and dangerous, but mostly wrong, like I'd be weak if I relied upon it right now.

Yes, I'm aware of how amoral using mind control to get sex is, but it sounds worse than it is. See, before I became the Princess's student, I could afford to be a bit of a slut here and there if I wanted, no one batted an eye. After Celestia took me in though, I had to take precautions when I got in that sort of mood. A little ambient perception alteration (far more reliable than illusion magic), shifting the memories of my playmate in the morning so they remember taking a fine non-descript stallion or mare to bed instead of me...you get the idea.

It's not exactly hard to land a mare or stallion in the seedier parts of Canterlot. I mean really, it isn't. Ponies that haven't experienced that life before either don't know or can't seem to fathom it, but there are a lot of loose mares and stallions hanging out in less reputable clubs and bars. They'll put out in seconds as long as you can blend in with them, and I'm not talking about prostitutes or anything.

Some ponies think it's sad that anyone could just give themselves up to others like that willy-nilly. I say that those 'whores' are more honest with themselves than most. Modern society just frowns on slutty behavior, especially when it comes to the higher classes.

But Swirly? She was in an entirely different league. Classy, well-off, smart, experienced...I hadn't a single clue how to even start approaching this mare! What was I going to do, try to seduce her with a lecture about arcane application of advanced physics or something?

How fortunate that she wasn't always so high up on the social ladder over the course of her life. Well, for me, anyways.

"...And I'm just standing there like 'Hey what? No, you attacked me! Why would I apologize?!' You know why he demanded an apology, making a big scene out of it?"

I couldn't help but grin as she giggled and tapped her hoof against the counter. She really was adorable.

"Oh, I need to hear this. What was his reason? I just know it was something stupid." she said, her empty cup long forgotten.

"Oh it's great, just-okay," I said, waving my forehooves in front of myself a little. "He thought that I bumped into him...four or five blocks back, and he followed me all that way before getting in my face about it!"

"Seriously?!"

"Seriously! Needless to say, he was shouting, making a big scene, but he was all talk. You know the type," I said, puffing out my chest and sitting up straighter and deepening my voice. "I'm a big tough ghetto colt, who you think you talkin' to like that, little filly?! I oughta lay yo' ass out!"

A sudden burst of laughter from her caused me to join her, both of us enjoying a moment of joy together, my forehooves curling around my middle while tears gathered in the corners of my eyes. I blinked them away while wiping the corners with my fetlocks, a wide smile on my lips as well as hers.

"Wow, just-wow, have you really run into ponies like that?" she asked me, leaning her weight against the counter, bracing with a foreleg.

"Yup! Plenty of 'em. Anyways, he only got that one good hit in on me before I knocked him on his ass," I muttered casually, waving it off as if dismissing the memory itself. "I think he was a bit drunk anyways, and I'm pretty sure he underestimated me because I walk with a limp."

"Bet he left a shiner on your face though."

"Eeehh..." I said, rolling one of my hooves back and forth. "Kinda-sorta."

She heh'ed and went quiet for a moment. "...You're definitely different from what I expected. Kinda surprises me that you're the same mare that ponies talk about in the castle," she said, grinning a little. "You know, quiet and studious and all that stuff."

I just shrugged at that and rolled my eyes. "Yeah, I'm one in a million."

"Oh, so humble too!" she said, giggling for a brief moment before something occurred to her. "You know, with how outgoing you were, it seems strange that you don't have more friends."

My smile faded almost immediately. I had friends once. It was awesome. Real friends like Moondancer and Minuette, Lemon Hearts and Twinkleshine...not the kinds of 'friends' you find wandering the streets, gangbanging (not in the sexual way, get your minds out of the gutter) and urging you to do the same. Nor the ones that'll gladly stab you in the back if the pay's good enough. Movies and books really romanticize it too much: loyalty's at a premium between criminals.

I slumped a little in my seat. "Yeah, well, I told you I never get the chance to entertain guests. This is sort of a first! Really, I'm out of my element here."

I could feel her hoof come to rest on my shoulder, and I smiled as she patted me.

"C'mon now, no need for that! I mean, I don't know you all that well either," she said to me, then blushed a bit. "I certainly didn't know you were hiding such a big secret all this time!"

"Uh," I stuttered, grinning a little while quirking a brow. "Phrasing?"

She just gave me a sly smile and pulled her hoof away, relaxing a little in her seat. "Oh, I know what I said! I believe they refer to it as a double entendre."

I just blushed and looked at the empty glasses, trying to gather my thoughts. What should I say? What should I do? I wasn't incompetent enough to believe that just diving in with zero subtlety or caution would've been a good idea, but then without that what exactly was I supposed to do? Was this easy for other ponies or did they have some kind of secret teaching that I was woefully lacking in?! Gah, I should've read up on this stuff!

I settled for clearing my throat and moving the empty glasses to the sink. I'd deal with them later.

"Soooo, you're saying my dick's big?"

Well, balls-to-the-wall it is then! Good job, Sparkle. Sometimes, for all the vast intellect I seem to have, my brain utterly fails me at the worst possible moments.

"...I'm fairly sure that's what I just said, among other things." she stated quietly, a shy smile making it clear just how nervous she was.

Whoa wait what. There's no way....

I stared at her for a moment, then coughed into my hoof and felt my cheeks begin to burn as well. "You...know that I'm underage, right? Not by much, I know, but...yeah."

"Yes, I know. You're just, well, very mature for your age," she said, nervously pawing at the countertop with her hoof. "Does that matter to you? Your age, I mean. It's not like you're twelve or ten or anything like that...."

No fucking way! Really? It was-no, no way. It couldn't be this easy. Well I mean, not that I'm calling her easy or anything, but certainly easier than I was expecting. I was almost expecting her to ask for flowers, maybe going out to dinner or something like that before we even broached a topic like this.

I couldn't help myself. I had to push it further. At this point, I was more curious how far this could wind up going before it went too far rather than purely desiring to get under her tail.

"You know, you must've been looking pretty hard at it in that short span of time to decide whether it was big or not," I muttered, nervously shifting in my seat. "Or something like that."

The change in the room's atmosphere was almost jarring. She was looking at me in surprise, but with how her tail was swishing with such excitement, I get the feeling she wasn't just shocked. I'm guessing she expected me to turn her down, or worse.

"Well, not as close as I would've liked..." she said, the uncertainty in her voice clear as day.

I let my hindlegs drift apart more as things began to wander into a realm of familiarity for me. Regardless of how you reached that point in a relationship, sex is sex, and some things about it are fairly universal. Already, there was a clear bulge in my pants that her eyes seemed drawn to, and I capitalized on the opportunity.

"A lot of this is outside of my comfort zone, as I said before. But if you really want to, you can have a closer look," I said to her, trying to get more comfortable in my seat, but at the moment I felt rather energetic. I think I just wanted to pounce on her like an animal. "I'm always eager to learn more."

Now, there were many things that I was expecting in that moment. Nervousness getting the better of her and making her reconsider, fear of getting caught stopping me from really getting into it, those sorts of things. After all, this was illegal for us to be doing together. What I did not expect was to find her slipping out of her seat, and stepping close to me until she was very much in my personal space.

Maybe it was stupid to not expect that, but still, she was quick!

However, she didn't just dive in. Instead, her hoof hesitated a scant few inches away from my crippled hindleg, and I braced against the side of the countertop while resting my foreleg on it, opening myself up to her more.

"You're, uh...you're sure about this, right?"

I just grinned. "Heh, yeah! Why wouldn't I be?"

The relieved sigh she let out made me smile, and I relaxed as her hoof rubbed over the inside of my hindleg, teasing towards my crotch.

"Good! It's been a while for me," she muttered, her horn glowing and popping the button on my pants. "Is your hindleg okay?"

I glanced down at it and noticed that it was twitching a little. I shrugged it off.

"It's fine, don't worry about it," I said, reaching down to idly massage the strained muscles with a hoof. "It happens sometimes."

We stared at each other for a brief moment, a pause in time that was only made slightly more awkward by the fact that she was undoing my fly with her magic. Fortunately, that lone moment didn't last long.

It doesn't take me long to get hard. Really, it doesn't, especially when it's obvious what's about to happen to me down there. My cock was already popping up from under the band of my underwear, and if the way she was looking at it was any indication, she didn't plan to just jump right to the main event.

I felt a shiver rocket through me as her hoof touched it, gently rubbing over what was already revealed to her, while her horn lit up and began to loosen my tie and slip it off of my neck. Given that she couldn't see the countertop, I was kind of surprised to see how neatly she laid my tie down and smoothed it out. My top was next, the buttons easily coming undone within her magical grasp. I spread my forelegs out and let her ease me out of it, watching as she once again folded my garment up and set it down on the counter.

"You're really good with your magic." I noted idly, squirming a bit as she planted a kiss on my belly.

What? I'm ticklish there. Of course she noticed, so she immediately gave me another one, which almost made me wiggle right out of my chair! I could feel my cheeks burning with embarrassment and indignation while she simply laughed at me. The sudden sensation of the flat of her tongue licking over the equally flat head of my shaft settled me down though.

"Ticklish, huh~?"

I could practically feel that cheshire grin that spread across her muzzle, the wicked intent that she held for my midsection making me quickly lower my forelegs to guard my belly. She gave me a small pout and stepped back, and I sighed in relief. I looked down at myself and realized that I was standing fully at attention, my pants seeming almost entirely useless in containing my girth.

Without saying a word, I slipped out of my chair and began to light up my horn to remove my pants. Before I could even lower down onto four legs though, she beat me to the punch and caught me, turning us so my back was to the counter. I could feel the soft fur of her belly rubbing against my own, the gentle sensation of our bodies grinding together mingling with the tingling touch of my shaft being ground between us. I'm fairly sure she was doing it on purpose.

She used her magic to tug my pants and my underwear down until they crumpled at my hooves. I stepped out of them while she pressed a heated kiss to my lips. The gentle caress of soft flesh quickly drew me in, and for a moment I lost myself in the feel of her body against my own, hooves brushing over fur and through her mane. She was downright ferocious! I wouldn't have blamed someone for walking in and assuming she was trying to eat my face. Not that I was complaining.

I could feel her weight press against me more, her forelegs circling around my withers and locking us together. I gripped her tight in return and ran my hooves down her sides, feeling over the curve of her hips. She tensed when I reached lower, and I gave a quick smack to her cutie mark with a hoof, which made her jolt and squeak in the most adorable way.

Funny thing about cutie marks is, not all ponies have sensitive cutie marks. For example, my brother doesn't. I do, and sometimes when I'm walking around, the fabric of my pants gets to me. You get used to it though, kind of like how stallions that wear clothes growing up just sort of naturally adjust to having some kind of fabric rubbing against their junk all day.

"Ooh! Sensitive cutie marks, huh?" I teased, grinning wickedly and giving it another smack.

She jolted and gave me a mock-angry glare, the upward curve on the corner of her lips giving her away.

"You're being very naughty for such a well-behaved mare!"

"I'm a teenager. Being naughty kind of comes with the title," I muttered, rubbing my hoof more firmly over her cutie mark. "Got a problem with that?"

The slow sashay of her hips and the sensitive trembling of the muscles in her flanks made me quiver with primal delight. I slipped my hooves back up to her hips and pulled her closer, grinding my own arousal against her belly more.

"No problem at all, hun...speaking of which," she muttered, pulling away to look down at the precum that I'd stained her fur with. "Looks like you've got a problem that needs taking care of."

I certainly did. I was almost painfully hard right now, and my youthful eagerness was on full display. She slipped out of my grasp as she kissed a trail down my chest and stomach, causing me to fidget more and stifle some small laughter as she drifted closer to my stallionhood.

"You alright standing on your hindleg like that?" she asked, her muzzle inches from the base of my cock.

I nodded quickly. "Yeah, it's fine, just...don't worry about it."

I tried to keep the aggravation out of my voice, but when everyone asks if you're okay just because you've got a jacked-up leg, it tends to start grating on your nerves. Would I be standing up on two legs if it did bother me? No? Then don't bring it up! Besides, if you really think a little leg pain is going to stop a horny teen from getting a blowjob right then and there, you clearly don't remember or realize what priorities most teenagers have.

She had this cowed look on her face, like I'd hurt her feelings. I sighed and shook my head, quickly giving her a brief apology. Of course, she apologized as well, but really, it's something I've come to expect. I think it just got to me in that moment because I was getting impatient. I mean c'mon, I'm throbbing here!

The first lick put my mind at ease, and the second made my dick twitch as soft lips met my sack and suckled one of my nuts into her muzzle. I could feel her tongue sloshing around it, lapping at the tender flesh and teasing what was already a pretty full testicle just to get it to produce more. Then she switched to the other, and I glanced down at her.

The look on her face was priceless, so focused, so dedicated to taking in the taste of my sweaty skin and pleasing me...I reached down to run a hoof over her mane, my dick twitching against the top of her snout and the side of her horn. I felt her warm breath wash over the base of my shaft as she licked my nuts clean, not that they were all that sweaty to begin with, I make a habit of showering when I wake up and before I go to bed. I wasn't exactly at the castle long. Then again I was totally freaking out and really horny...

My train of thought, as often as it can derail even if I have something to focus on, quickly found the tracks again when her muzzle opened wide and she ran her tongue up the belly of my shaft from base to tip, every nerve ending lighting up with gentle pleasure that made me coo in delight. I felt her hoof grasp the base of it, and a single stroke made me twitch and soak the end of her snout with more of my pre.

I could feel her starting to put her tongue to better use, and my eyes slid shut so I could relish the sensation of her firmly lapping over the head of my cock, cleaning up what little mess I'd made of it thus far. I cracked an eye open to peek at what she was up to, only to catch her pursing her lips around my unflared head. I stuttered out a moan as she suckled firmly at it and roughly rubbed her tongue this way and that against the end of my tool, making it throb and twitch rapidly in her grasp while I writhed and arched where I stood, helpless under the wondrous assault on my senses.

Then she went deeper. Oh sweet FUCK-!

You have to understand that I've been deepthroated before. Quite a few times, actually. It's nothing new to me. But the way Swirly moved with such purpose, the way she made her tongue flick and lap at the underside of my cock while inch after inch disappeared between her lips...there was something so much more intense about it.

I felt myself bump into the back of her mouth, and I figured that was it, not even to the medial ring, but then she took a deep breath and lunged smoothly forward on me! My eyes clenched shut again and my hoof smacked at the countertop as I tried to brace myself, my hindlegs trembling beneath me as I slid into the infinitely tighter confines of her throat. Every muscle in my body tensed as she swallowed around me and pushed down until her lips kissed against my sheath.

My breath hitched and my free forehoof moved to rest over the top of her head, caressing through her mane while she looked up at me with a smoldering gaze that made my entire body tremble with desire. She twisted her head left and right, and I could feel every little motions her muzzle and her throat made around me. It felt like I was trapped, and I never wanted to escape!

It actually usually took a lack of caution, or a certain level of trust to slip a pony's cock down your throat. When that flare thickens? Yeah, that thing's there to make sure all of that cum stays inside of your partner, and we ponies tend to be fairly voluminous compared to most others. Only zebras really out-produce us in that regard. Combine something designed to plug a hole with someone's throat and, well, yeah. Problems could arise. Very embarrassing and life-threatening problems.

I can just see the obituaries now. 'Swirling Breeze, 25, death by asphyxiation via underage penis.' Mind you that sort of thing's not guaranteed, it's not a perfect seal, but it can really make someone's gag reflex kick in, and if it's a particularly large flare then yeah. You get the idea.

In any case, she didn't give me much of a chance to catch myself. It was mere seconds before she began to move, pulling back until I was just barely out of her throat once more and plunging back down on me. The slight gagging noise was like music to my ears, and I reflexively pushed my hips forward when I felt her lips on my sheath again, that primal desire to get as deep as possible taking control of me in that brief instant.

She gagged again, and I quickly apologized, but she just gave a small shake of her head and pushed towards me more, her eyes clenching shut as she forced herself down just a bit further for my satisfaction. I grunted and my cock pulsed in her throat, and she just smiled up at me.

For obvious reasons, I didn't last long. I'd lost track of how long she'd begun to bob up and down on my shaft, the lewd slurps and dirty gagging noises joining a symphony of moans from myself that I did my best to keep fairly quiet for fear of Spike hearing us from upstairs, but I really couldn't help it.

By the time I was close, she was in her own little world, all cozy between my legs, hunched up a little and rapidly bobbing her head back and forth on me, forehooves resting on my hips and holding me there while she quite literally tried to milk me for everything my balls had to offer. I had to warn her before I flared up too much, I knew that, but I was having a really hard time finding my voice...!

"I-I'm-ahh...!"

Yes, quite eloquent of me. Fortunately, she got the message, and with no hesitation she kept on going, much to my surprise. Was she not worried? I found myself lacking the mental capacity to care or think about it, as a welling pleasure quickly began to overwhelm me. I could feel the juices of my slit trickling down over my balls and soaking the fur around the back of my thighs from my arousal, slit winking out of sight while my tail swished erratically back and forth.

I felt her pull back at the very last moment, my back arching and a hot, loud groan escaping me as I flared up in her mouth and shot the first of several thick ropes of rich, sticky seed. I had expected her to pull off the moment it hit her palate, cum generally didn't have a pleasant texture or flavor, but she just cupped my balls with her hooves and gently rolled them around while swallowing every last drop of what I had to offer her. Her tongue flicked at my cockhead and her muzzle twisted this way and that, prolonging my release and making me have to shuffle my hindlegs just to keep myself upright. I braced some of my weight against my forehoof on the countertop while the other held on to the back of her head, trembling with each kittenish flick of her tongue.

My entire body felt like crumpling to the floor when my release was finally over, but Swirly, ever playful, decided to tease and lick at my sensitive shaft a few more times before letting it go. I legitimately thought my hindlegs were going to fail me before her lips pulled off of me with a noisy wet pop.

She cleared her throat and winked at me. "Wow, you were pent-up! I almost couldn't swallow it all."

Fffuck, she swallowed my load. That fact didn't register immediately, but once it did...let's just say, I was starting to go soft. Not anymore. Her eyes widened a little as she felt my dick throb to life once more, her hoof idly stroking over it.

"Huh. Still hard, too. Usually stallions are spent, at least for a little while." she mused, looking at my cock as if it were some kind of science specimen to be studied.

I couldn't help a small laugh. "Spurt of youth, maybe?"

"Hermaphrodite, more like," she said, letting me go and getting to her hooves once more. "I've heard about the kind of stamina your kind have."

"Yeah, but I'm on suppressants. They tend to help make my hormones a bit more regular," I replied, my horn lighting up and surrounding her with my magic. "Buuuut, enough about that..."

She yelped in surprise as I spun her around, moving down to all fours and stepping in behind her, my hoof brushing up the back of her hindleg, up her haunch and under her tail. I pressed my hoof under the base of it and pushed upward, forcing it into the air.

"You have something I want. Judging by your scent, you want what I've got too," I spoke casually, leaning my head down under her tail. "I think we can come to a mutually beneficial agreement...!"

"Little warning next ti-hi-hi-hoooo, yeah...!"

My tongue had found its way to her slit, licking from her clit up towards her tailhole firmly and slowly, parting those lips gently apart around that dextrous muscle. I don't know how it got there, I swear! Pretty sure she didn't have any complaints regardless.

I pulled my tongue back and grinned. I didn't even have to hold her tail up anymore now, she had that sucker up and she was already starting to wink at me down there. Guess she just needed a little stimulation.

"Hey, you got a sample of me! My palate was sorely lacking a taste of the mare so sweetly satisfying my stiffy," I said, hearing her sudden bark of laughter at my alliteration. "I didn't feel like being patient."

"H-how very much like a young pony! Patience is a virtue, you know!" she said, looking back at me out of the corner of her eye and wiggling her flanks at me. "Well? What're you waiting for?"

"So does this mean you're not virtuous? Also, last I checked, you were still plenty young-"

My head jerked back a little when she pushed her flank back against my face, letting out the cutest little whine! She shut me up pretty damn quick, doing that. I gave the back of her thigh a playful nip with my front teeth, kissing a trail up her flank and under her tail, my muzzle inches from a very hot, very wet hole that I couldn't wait to do several lewd and crude things to.

Seriously, fuck the nobility. Pussy is one of the sweet delights of life! How can you be all stuck-up and snob-nosed about stuff like this?!

I decided that my muzzle had better uses than speech at the moment, so without any warning I buried my muzzle against her slit. My lips parted against hers and I gave a long, deep lick from bottom to top and down again, the sudden taste of horny, needy mare attacking my tastebuds.

I've always found that I have a thing for being in control. Whether I'm giving pleasure or receiving it, on bottom or on top, it doesn't matter. I need to have a sense of control over what's happening in that intense and very intimate moment, or I just...I don't know, it doesn't feel right for me. I'm not a control freak, don't get me wrong, I just don't trust ponies with my body unless I'm giving it to them on my terms, be it my muzzle or anything else.

A choked-off squeal from her only drove me to push my tongue further into her, my nostrils flaring and taking in the heady scent of a very horny, very needy mare. Ponies always shied away from things like this because it's such a dirty thing to do, but that really depends on the pony. Still, that powerful feminine musk was filling me with those animal urges that I'd become so used to repressing, and she tasted...clean. Well, compared to previous instances of carpet-munching I mean.

I'm not shy, nor am I a prude, and I quite like making ponies squirm. I just don't do it as often as I'd like to. Not enough room in my schedule for hunting down some tail anytime I want. As such, I've picked up plenty of curious scents from my partners, many of them nowhere near as clean as Swirly here. She tasted lovely, that unique tangy flavor of pussy that was without a doubt an acquired taste, but there was a vast lack of bitterness. Oh it was still there, it usually is, but it didn't overpower my senses the way it did with certain...other partners.

Then there were those ponies that bought those pills that can make your sexual fluids taste like a wide range of things. Me, I prefer things au naturale. I don't want to lick a mare down there and taste raspberries, I want to taste her. I mean...oh, how to explain it? I've tampered with my senses so much over the years, my sense of smell was just the beginning, it's just natural for me.

Imagine, every time you inhaled, with enough focus, you could smell everything in your immediate vicinity. The brass on your quill, the ink on the paper in front of you...now imagine stuffing your snout against a mare's slit and getting a good whiff of her. To most ponies, she simply smells like an aroused mare, appealing and exciting. To me? She smells like Swirling Breeze, and no other mare can possibly smell exactly the same as she does like this.

I could smell her arousal from across the room right now, let alone having my tongue shoved up her cunt. Considering our sense of smell is closely related to our sense of taste as well...yeah. You get a general idea.

Mm, and at this moment in time, I was having my senses filled with everything Swirling Breeze, and I had no intention of stopping! I sat down behind her and grasped her flanks with my forehooves, every little sound from the lovely mare pushing me to lick her faster, press against her walls and grind my tongue along them in firm, smooth laps that tantalized me as much as it made her moan.

Oh she tried to keep her voice down, really she did, but when I get enthusiastic about something, I tend to give it my all. To say I get enthusiastic about eating a mare out, well...that's an understatement.

I brought a hoof up to tease the edge of it over her clit, teasing at it every time her slit winked at me, my muzzle getting soaked with her juices the longer I worked her over. Soon she stepped forward, panting softly and raising up to rest her forehooves on the counter in front of her, opposite the one I'd been leaning on earlier, one hoof moving up to brace her weight against the overhead cabinet.

She was dripping on the floor now. I took pride in that. I tucked in closer to her and pressed my forehooves against those tender cutie marks of hers, rubbing and toying with them and making every muscle in her backside quiver in delight in the process, getting a front-row view of the sensual display.

"C'monnnn...!" she whined out at me, the almost desperate tone of her voice making me giddy for what was to come.

I mushed my snout against her winking slit and plunged my tongue deep, tasting her juices and letting them trickle down my tongue and stain my palate even further. I licked and lapped noisily and sloppily at her, soaking my muzzle even further in her nectar, lower lip grinding and rubbing at her clit constantly while my hooves kept themselves occupied with her cutie marks.

I could feel her walls clenching, tightening around me while her voice hitched and her body began to tense in my grasp. I lapped at her faster, my tongue starting to feel the burn of fatigue as I fought against her squeezing inner muscles to get as deep into her as I possibly could.

With a sudden loud cry, she pushed her ass back against me, almost knocking me over onto my back in the process, and a series of whimpering, squeaking moans filled the kitchen while wet, oily marecum soaked my face. I didn't dare stop, my lips pursing around her clit and suckling firmly, pulling back on it and grinding my tongue over it while one of my hooves moved to rub between her slitlips in smooth, constant motions.

I wanted her ecstasy to last, and I was rewarded with a second, smaller release from her just as she began to come down from the first, her entire body undulating as I suckled at that decently-sized pleasure button of hers without mercy. I felt her push back against me, and I pushed forward in kind, giving her something to grind against while she rode out a rather explosive duo of orgasms.

By the time she was done my tongue felt sore and exhausted, but seeing her backside slump down, seeing her mane slightly damp from sweat and hanging down over her face while she braced her upper body against the countertop...oh yeah. Twilight Sparkle knows how to make the mares melt! My pride's riding high, literally and figuratively!

She eventually joined me on the floor, slumping down and sitting in a small puddle of her own juices, my cock jutting out from under me, eager for action. Still, I think we both needed just a little time, and after that I felt like some water was a good idea for me. I used my magic to grab one of our empty glasses and put it in the sink, turning the cold water on while scooting in against Swirly's back, embracing her from behind.

"You made a mess of me as well as the floor," I teased, kissing along the side of her neck. "I should make you clean that up."

She was still panting a little, but the look she gave me was nothing less than smoldering hot. I could tell she was hungry for more, but even she seemed to need a small breather. I filled my cup with water and shut the tap off, bringing it down and taking in a mouthful of the refreshing liquid.

"Yeah, heh, you could, but then you'd be a terrible host!" she said, twisting where she sat so she could give me a kiss on the cheek. "Bleh. You're soaked. I really did that?"

"Yup! What, not a fan of your own juices?" I teased, licking my lips to take in just a bit more of her. "I think you taste fantastic."

"Yeah well I don't, so maybe you should wash your face?" she suggested, motioning to the sink.

I didn't argue against it. Some ponies were skittish about that sort of thing, who was I to tell them otherwise? Fortunately, I had just the spell to deal with this, honed over long hours of washing 'accidents' from my fur while taking care of Spike.

I set my cup of water on the counter and stood up, my horn glowing with arcane power and spreading over my face, working into my fur and under the fluids clinging to me. I lifted the slick fluids up and off of my body, enveloped in a small bubble of magic that I floated over to the sink. I released the bubble and flicked the faucet on, quickly washing the unwanted liquids down the drain.

"Better?" I asked, a slow inhale letting me know that her scent was still heavily lingering in my fur.

She had turned around and moved away from the wet spot on the tiled floor, discreetly using a paper towel to clean herself up just a bit down there. Well, dry off at least, I don't know about cleaning up. Curiously, she had a cup of water in her magic that I quickly realized definitely wasn't hers...and she was chugging its contents down.

"Hey," I said, my magic reaching out to caress over her own, both of us holding the cup now. "That's mine."

"Mmmmmmhmm," she hummed, her lips around the rim of it. "Your point?"

"Gimme."

"Nuh-uh."

"Yuh-huh," I said, stepping over in front of her. "I'm thirsty."

She pulled the cup away from herself and grinned a little as she gave it over to me, her magic fading as I took hold of it. "Still? Well, I guess you were lapping at me like I was an oasis in a desert...."

I just rolled my eyes at her and finished off what was left in my cup, carelessly tossing it into the sink while grabbing some paper towels and putting them to work scrubbing at the floor. It wasn't a full clean-up job, but if anyone came home unexpectedly, they at least wouldn't have to live with the embarrassment of breaking their legs slipping on some mare's release. I also wouldn't have to deal with the fallout of my family finding out I was sticking it to Celestia's aide.

"Well I don't exactly know any techniques, all I've ever been able to do is experiment, and outside of a few constants, every mare's different...er, not that I've been with tons of mares or anything!" I said quickly, clearing my throat. "Just...maybe six or seven?"

"Well! 'Just' six or seven, huh?" she said, giving me a playful shove with her hoof. "Stud."

"Pff, not really."

"I dunno, that's a pretty decent number for your age," she said, humming a little. "And you think you don't know anything?"

I shrugged at that. "I'm sure I know a few things, but it's not like anyone's ever sat down to teach me. I have a copy of the Kamare Sutra, but I've never really met anyone who's willing to really experiment with that stuff, let alone teach me."

She hummed in thought for a moment, giving me a more evaluating glance. "Are you suggesting something, Lady Sparkle?"

"Depends. What do you think I'm suggesting?" I asked, unable to help the sly smirk at the corner of my lips.

"Well it sounds to me like you're suggesting that you need a teacher in the sexual arts," she said matter-of-factly, a wicked grin spreading across her muzzle. "I thought you already had a teacher though? I would think she teaches you everything."

My brain froze as the mental image of Celestia rubbing my pussy off while instructing me on how to work my muscles to achieve maximum orgasmic release hit me. I shook the offending image away quickly and grimaced a little.

"Yeah, let's not mix sex and Princess Celestia...I just can't picture her ever doing that sort of stuff."

That was a lie. Thankfully I was already hard or my fifth leg would've given me away.

Swirly just shrugged at me and filled her cup with more water from the sink. "Well, if not her, then perhaps you're suggesting that I teach you?" she said, the lilt in her voice followed by a small giggle. "Aw, it's sweet that you hold me in such high regard already! I suppose I could teach you a thing or two..."

I gulped as she stalked up to me, both of us only inches apart as she took another drink of water, then offered her cup to me. Not thinking, I simply downed some of it, my thirst only just now starting to be sated for the time being. I was sure that by the time she was done with me, I'd be feeling parched once more.

"But first, you need to show me what you can do," she teased, lightly booping the end of my snout with her hoof. "You've got a muzzle on you, but I wanna see what this thing can do to me!"

The sudden feeling of her rubbing her hoof over the head of my cock made my magic grip on the cup waver, the water in it sloshing a little because of it. I quickly set the cup on the counter and moved forward, locking her in a hungry kiss while wrapping my forelegs around her withers. She didn't resist in the least.

Our tongues mashed together between our lips while her hooves curled around my back, the two of us pulling at each other as the minutes ticked by. When we finally broke apart, we were panting and out of breath, but we both knew exactly what we wanted.

I nudged under her chin with my snout. "Upstairs. Now. My room."

She murred at that and stood up, turning her side to me. "Woo, getting pushy now, huh? Not very lady-"

"Now!"

I genuinely didn't know what came over me in that moment. I was impatient and eager and she was being a playful tease and I wasn't having any of it! I darted in next to her and gave her cutie mark a firm nip, the sudden squeal of surprise from her only bolstering my behavior. Judging by how she flicked her tail excitedly around in the air afterwards, I don't think she had a problem with it.

I was thankful for the aspirin working for the time being, though the stairs in the foyer did still make my bad leg hurt. As with any other time, I paid little attention to it aside from confirming that it did indeed hurt. My mind was likely going to be occupied with far more situationally important things in a few moments.

Every little squeak she let out as I nipped at her flanks on the way upstairs was just the most adorable thing. She seemed flustered by my sudden aggressiveness, and the way she nickered and jolted forward whenever my teeth gave her cutie marks a little nip made me satisfied in a way that I can't fully describe. It was a primitive thing, nipping at a mare's flanks like ponies from ancient times once did, but that didn't stop me.

Her tail flicked up into the air more than once as I playfully chased her down the hall, past Spike's bedroom and into mine. The moment the door was shut, she spun around on me and gave me a rather sloppy, tongue-filled kiss that pressed my rump back against the door.

"You-" she uttered between the flurry of kisses she showered upon my muzzle. "-are an evil bitch-" More kisses. "-and I swear if we didn't get in here as quick as we did I'd be presenting out in the hallway right now."

This was more within my scope of experience, dealing with a horny, excited mare that wants nothing more than to get right down to business. I broke the kiss and tilted my head to the side, my chest bumping against her and pushing her back, forcing her onto her haunches while I wrapped one foreleg around her barrel. She squeaked and haphazardly grabbed at my withers as I began to force her to sit back, my teeth suddenly finding a nice soft spot on the side of her neck to firmly bite down.

She went rigid and her tail flitted back and forth excitedly behind her, and the quiet whimper that escaped her throat only made me attack another spot on her neck, closer to her collarbone. It was instinctual, especially for a prey species like us. We feel teeth on such a soft vulnerable part of us, we instantly have warning sirens going off in our heads...but she also knows she's not in danger right now. For some ponies, that's enough to make them cum! For her, it just made a damp spot in my carpet.

"Fuck! What-mm!-what got into you all the sudden?" she huffed out, her entire body trembling as I trailed kisses along the side of her neck to her jawline.

I just grinned and nibbled at her jawline, toying with that spot just between her jaw and her neck. A dim glow of a spark from the tip of her horn made my cock twitch just a little at the thought of just how excited she must be to start losing control of her magic already.

"Oh you know, just the thought of fucking you senseless," I whispered, raising my head to nip the tip of one of her ears. "Get on my bed and show me how you want it."

Oh, how she did. She trotted over there while I lit my horn and cast a veil of silence over the entirety of the room. If we got loud I didn't want us waking Spike up. Good way to totally kill the mood.

She laid on her back on the bed while I moved to join her, crawling up onto it and shifting over her, pressing my snout down into the fur of her belly and taking a deep breath. There was excitement, the scent of wetness between her legs, but also sweat, nervousness and anticipation for what was coming.

I looked up to meet her gaze, the older mare squirming a little as I lightly lipped at her fur, teasing a trail up her barrel and chest to her throat. She tilted her head back as I kissed along her throat to her chin, able to feel her swallowing in that familiar mix of excitement and eagerness that I was becoming more adjusted to the more I felt her body beneath mine.

She gripped my withers with her forehooves as I laid down against her, our lips meeting in a far more restrained kiss than she probably expected. Didn't stop her from being enthusiastic about it, though. She pulled at my withers while I squeezed my forelegs against her sides, embracing her while we made out.

Under normal circumstances, a mare as horny as her would already be tail-up and getting pounded into my mattress...but I held myself back. I wanted to please her, impress her even. Bring my A-game, you know? I felt like anything less would've been doing her a disservice. She's not some gutter-tramp I picked up in a bar, she's Celestia's aide and a more high-class mare than anyone else I've ever been with!

Of course, that didn't change the fact that my throbbing, twitching member was resting between us, the belly of it pressing down against her slit and slowly rubbing back and forth between her netherlips. I slowly pumped my hips to tease her more, and soon little moans began to swap between our muzzles, her hindlegs squeezing around my hips and bucking up against me as well.

We fell into a pleasing rhythm, grinding together and getting my dick soaked in her juices. Seriously, she was one wet mare down there! I'm surprised she wasn't more of a squirter...but then, I didn't really give her much of a chance to squirt, I had my muzzle buried in there! Eh, I'd find out later, probably.

I slowly broke the kiss and nosed at her neck, nuzzling my snout along her throat. "Face-to-face? Most ponies go for missionary."

"According to dragons and minotaurs, this is missionary-AH!"

I gave a firm, long grind against her, my cock raking against her slitlips and her clit just as she finished speaking. We were both panting and each little motion of our bodies had both of us squirming against each other, fidgeting amidst our bit of foreplay, and a sudden firm grind against me accompanied a much louder moan from her. Her body seemed to tense and writhe against me, and the way her face scrunched up and her mouth lilted open in bliss was just...mmph, sexy? Adorable? Maybe both? I still don't know how to describe that particular look!

I could feel her slit winking against my cock, and I knew she was ready. Words weren't necessary in that moment. I simply moved and lifted my hips, my shaft sliding down until the flat head pressed against her slit, and I pushed slowly forward.

Her reaction was immediate. Her forelegs squeezed at my withers and she buried her muzzle against the side of my neck, muffled moans billowing her warm breath through my fur and against my skin while inch after inch smoothly sunk deeper into her. Every wink of her slit seemed to tug and pull at my cock, urging me deeper, welcoming me into her most sacred depths. I didn't resist in the least.

Restraint was the name of the game, and I was trembling with the mental effort of not giving in to my base desires and simply rutting her like an animal. I was better than that, I had to be for someone like her! Still, when I felt my balls press up against her ass and my cock fully enveloped by that smoldering, wet warmth, I couldn't help but grind forward with a soft growl, her body arching and her hindlegs suddenly squeezing tight around my waist.

She moaned loudly as I rolled my hips against her, grinding my dick deep into her and pressing down against her. Her head slumped back against the bed when I backed off, and she weakly giggled and rubbed her hooves up and down along the back of my neck.

"Ooh, yeah, it's been a while since I've felt that," she cooed, panting softly. "Feel so damn full right now...!"

"You make the cutest noises, you know that?" I muttered, grinning down at her.

She blushed brightly and hid her face against my neck. "Mmph, you hush!"

So. Fucking. Adorable!

It started so slowly, both of us moving together, just letting her get used to my size for now with small and slow motions in and out of her. Our fur ground together and I began to rock against her more, and her eyes drifted shut while her horn began to spark more against my headboard. I wasn't much better off, my own sparks joining hers and jolting together, many of them fizzling out together in a sudden arc of energy.

Soon, the lewd slap of my nuts against her nethers began to fill the room, accompanying our mutual cries of pleasure and satisfaction the more we got into it. I'd never have guessed that she was a screamer, but after that first time with her, I knew I'd have to become much more familiar with the veil of silence spell. It was practically a necessity.

She screamed for me to do her harder, to go faster, and I had no idea how long we'd been going at it by then. I could feel her pussy clenching around me, and with a sudden cry of utter bliss, she gripped me tight with all four of her limbs and came. I refused to stop even as her cum flooded around my dick, soaking my balls even more than they already were while her entire body flexed and trembled against me.

The sudden question she asked when she came down from her orgasmic high took me by surprise, and I had to slow down so she could speak.

"D-do you have-ah!-a dildo, or a vi-hmmnh~!-vibrator?!"

I didn't fully understand what she wanted it for, but I tried to settle myself down and focus enough to calm the sparking of my horn and use my magic. I grabbed a lockbox from my closet across the room and opened it, floating over a fairly large orange-colored dildo that was even bigger than I was. Swirly stared at it in awe for a moment, and I just huffed in-between my more intense panting.

"Wh-what? I like 'em big back there," I said, blushing more and lowering my ears in embarrassment. "Don't judge me."

"I'm not! Just...wow," she breathed, taking hold of it in her magic and looking it over for a brief moment. "Really thick, jeez...okay then."

I started moving again and quickly built up that hard, bucking pace we'd been at before, my own release already starting to tingle in my loins, a warning of what was coming. I closed my eyes and tried to focus on my breathing, if only to last longer for her, but she showed remarkable control over her magic in that moment, and with my eyes clenched shut I didn't see where she was moving that toy until I felt it.

With a gasp, I felt the flat head of the toy press against my own slit, teasing at it before firmly pushing into me, my back arching and my hips bucking forward on reflex, burying myself in her while she buried the toy in me. My eyes shot wide-open and my muzzle was hanging open in a silent cry, quickly followed by a choked moan and a violent full-body tremble. My cock twitched and throbbed as she drew the toy back, my slit clenching at it as it left me, only to plunge deep into me once more and make my hindlegs quiver, threatening to collapse out from under me.

I had done this while jerking off before, but this was something entirely different. I gripped her tight and hunched up against her, my hips moving quickly, slamming down against her while she clenched her eyes shut and seemed to pour all of her focus into maintaining her grip on my dildo.

I was not made aware of it until later, but apparently when I get overwhelmed like that, I make some really silly faces, and they only get sillier the closer I get to finishing.

It only took minutes, after that. The feeling of being pounded from behind while thrusting deep into Swirly, the heavy thud of the headboard rhythmically slamming against the wall, it all completely broke me down, and soon both of our horns were sparking rampantly. I didn't even ask when I began to press the side of my horn against hers, our magic arcing and sparking against one another along our horns and filling our minds with sensual tingles and jolts of energy that sent our entire bodies tingling.

I pressed into her one final time and ground down against her, my entire body tensing and arching against her while I cried out in utter satisfaction, my cockhead flaring deep inside of her just before a thick torrent of my cream fired into her. My slit clenched around that toy and she buried it all the way inside of me as my slit squeezed and completely soaked it in my juices, the dual sensation making me writhe and twist atop her, utterly overtaken with pleasure.

The sudden overpowering release made my magic billow out of my horn, our magic suddenly arcing in a powerful burst of raw energy that made her eyes roll back and her hips grind up against me in her own intense orgasm. It was a very private thing that I should've asked about before, since some unicorns still clung to the whole marriage thing when it came to arcing magic together, but I wasn't thinking clearly in that moment. I just...did it. It was a good way to orgasm together with your lover.

Her magic faltered in that instant and her grip on my dildo faded. By the time we were both spent, it slipped out of me and flopped onto the bed behind us, forgotten for the time being. We both panted heavily while we laid there together, basking in the afterglow and nuzzling each other affectionately.

We didn't bother speaking just yet, instead enjoying the comfort of one another's satisfaction, rubbing against each other and cuddling while we caught our breath.

When we finally did, she was first to speak up. "That...was so damn hot."

"Mmn, fully in agreement here..." I muttered, my eyes closed and my head resting against her wither, cheek nuzzling against the side of her neck idly. I was very much out of it.

I don't know how much time passed, but after what felt like mere minutes, she suddenly pushed against me and flipped us over, so that she was laying down on top of me instead. She teasingly ground down against me, then sat up and slowly slipped up and off of me, my partially-flared cockhead exiting her with a lewd wet slurp.

The sudden rush of my cum pouring from her soaked my lap, and I grimaced at the mess it made of me. "H-hey, what're you-?!"

She stood up over me and stuck her tongue out at me. "Better than making an even worse mess of the sheets, right? We both need a shower anyways."

I couldn't argue with that, and I simply watched as she hopped down from the bed, her hindlegs faltering a little when she landed, but she kept to her hooves. She looked back at me as she headed for the door, pausing to wiggle her ass at me, swaying to and fro slowly in a hypnotic gesture.

"You gonna join me, or what?"

Oh yes. Yes, I was.

Author's Note

So this took forever! Never realized how critical I could get about writing a sex scene. Still, I'm glad I did it, and I look forward to doing more!

Sorry you all had to wait so long. Hopefully next time it won't take nearly as much as it did this time around.

*glances at the word count* 14k... *headdesks*

Chapter 5 - Eternal Night (Pt. 1)

written by Fire Soul

That was how things started with Swirling Breeze. A single passionate encounter led into so many more over the next few months. I never let it get in the way of my schedule, but Swirly and I kept up with each other's schedules well enough to slip in a little 'us time' if I were home alone. Still, it didn't last.

Things between her and I weren't serious, I mean not in the 'totally gonna give a serious relationship a shot' kind of way. She taught me a lot, and I got to experience plenty of different things with her, but all good things come to an end. Even good things that have you making it about halfway through the Kamare Sutra before your lessons end.

Unbeknownst to her, she showed me the value of just being myself with someone I'm interested in, instead of twisting them around my hoof with my mind magic. There was something satisfying about not cheating my way into her non-existent pants, and I'm sure that if she knew what I was capable of, she'd appreciate the gesture. After running away screaming.

In any case, it was only around four months of screwing around before she met a really nice stallion in the accounting department of the castle. I didn't really know him very well, I only met him once while she and I were out getting lunch after my sparring time with the Royal Guard, but he seemed nice enough. She actually introduced me to him in hopes that I'd approve.

That was really sweet of her, when you think about it. We were just two ponies screwing around with each other, but she considered it intimate enough that she'd actually seek my counsel on him before moving forward. Once she and I got some private time again, we sat down and talked it out like two grown, mature ponies should, and I made it clear that if she felt like he might be worth it, she should go for it.

She gave me a tight hug and thanked me, and it didn't really need to be said for either of us to acknowledge that that was the end of our sexual escapades. Feisty little sexpot she may be, but she never seemed like the kind of mare to be disloyal, if monogamy's what she's aiming for. I was happy for her, in all honesty.

Doesn't mean that I wouldn't miss that sweet ass of hers, with her forelegs tied to my headboard and a gag in her mouth...ahem.

Without her there to give me a proper distraction, I threw myself into my studies more. I had more time to train my magical aptitude, dedicate myself to my combat training with the Royal Guard, and of course I had more time for Spike now. He'd grown past his little rebellious phase by the time I turned sixteen, and with all of these things keeping me occupied, I found myself dedicating less and less time to my...plans.

I had a few things in place, but they would take time to implement. I wasn't old enough for a lot of the things I wanted to do, and I didn't have the kinds of contacts I used to have. However, I'd made it this far, and I was a patient mare. I could wait...or so I thought.

As my life made a heel-turn, I progressively found it harder and harder to justify the things I wanted to do. I had a son to take care of, I was a high-profile pony that pretty much everyone in Canterlot knew about, and similar to my brother, I had the respect of the Royal Guard. Not to the extent he did, but those more in-the-know knew they shouldn't underestimate me just because I'm legally a cripple. Many of the Magus respected my magical talents as well, and I got several offers to be inducted as one of them. I always refused.

I tried not to think about it too much, and settled with the idea that planning any further now would be pointless without better context of what I'd be capable of once I reached the age of sixteen. I kept myself occupied instead with taking care of Spike and building upon the relationships I already had with my brother, Cadance and Celestia, along with the nobility that seemed to be rather fond of me.

Of course they were. I was Princess Celestia's protege. Fucking parasites.

Unfortunately, one of those parasites included Prince Blueblood, the most disgusting snake of a stallion I've ever met. My loathing of him was twofold however, because he seems to think he's so good at hiding it, and to be fair the mouth-breathers that call themselves the cream of the crop of Equestria don't seem to know unless he wants them to, but he's in the pocket of the Mafia. Add that little factoid to the fact that he was a pompous, lazy, mysoginistic two-faced backstabbing piece of shit limp-dicked son of a whore-!!

I apologize for that. I'm not prone to losing my cool, but when I do, I tend to explode. Probably all those repressed emotions.

He hit on me a lot. I mean almost every day, and I can't fully explain just how annoying it was. The days when I wasn't at the castle, few that they were, were the only days I actually got away from him, and even the coldest of withers didn't deter him when I was around him!

It wasn't like he didn't get it, he just doesn't understand the idea of a mare not wanting anything to do with him. Mares looking to climb the social ladder throw themselves at him all the time, and he never turned down the chance, not behind closed doors anyways. He was royalty, he did what he wanted. Honestly I'm amazed I haven't been drugged in the middle of the night, hauled off to his room and raped yet. He seems like the type when he doesn't get what he wants.

Of course it's also possible that he wanted to get with me for publicity's sake. Being Celestia's student tends to make you very popular, and royalty deserves only the best there is to offer! That includes deserving the delights other ponies can offer them. Ugh, the very thought makes me shiver with disgust....

In any case, it was shortly after I turned sixteen that things changed in my life, yet again. Spike was a year older, he was showing remarkable fluency for his age, and Shining was becoming a bit less secretive about the burgeoning relationship between himself and the Princess of Love. I could understand why they were being a bit more discreet, much like how certain members of the nobility were all over me because of my own status. Shining suddenly being outed as Cadance's coltfriend would put him in the middle of a very large, very bright metaphorical spotlight that he wouldn't be able to escape from unless he dumped her. I'm very sure neither of them wanted that to happen for any reason.

The biggest change, however, started rather innocently. I'd pulled a few books from the castle's library for some independent reading (which also happened to be studying for me), and one of them was an old history book that seemed like it hadn't gotten much attention in years. Seriously, this thing was dusty when I opened it up!

Once I gave it a casual read-through though, several things popped out at me. Old history about Discord seemed inconsistent with other books I'd read, but far more intriguing to me was the reference to the Mare in the Moon. There was almost nothing there about her, just legends and old tales, with a reference to an old mare's tale at the bottom of the last page that talked about her!

Discord was indeed a real person, any scholar in the castle knew that. The Mare in the Moon though...that was another matter. I knew the old mare's tale from back when I was a little filly, a thin book hidden away among my growing collection, something my brother picked up for me for my fifth birthday so he could read it to me. Why would that be mentioned in history books, but only be labeled as a legend?

It was a story of a sister spurned by her subjects, cast away in the shadow of the radiant Celestia, whom all the ponies adored. She fell to the doubts, insecurities and bitterness welling up inside of her, and became Nightmare Moon, the Bringer of Eternal Night! Epic stuff, when you really think about it. Can you imagine the kind of slow, painful, starving death we'd all be in for if Equestria and the entire world were bathed in nothing but moonlight for the rest of our days? The world would devolve into anarchy!

When I was a little filly, I never questioned this. But now, looking at this foal's book listed in one of the castle's history books...I began to grow suspicious. What would a legend that was regarded as merely an old mare's tale be doing in a history book dating all the way back to the Reign of Discord? No self-respecting scholar would put a history book together for the royal library and list a foal's book as a reference, either!

Some would call me paranoid. I say I grew up counting on paranoia to keep me alive when I was carrying fairly large packages of drugs for the Mafia, and knowing when I needed to back out of a really bad deal that was going ten different kinds of wrong. I needed to know when someone needed to die before they put a slug in me, and maybe I did kill some ponies that had no intention of killing me...but I was better off safe rather than sorry. Or dead. Or both.

I began to dig, but even more suspiciously, I could find nothing else about the Mare in the Moon. I pored over numerous old tomes, older than the book I'd found the legend in. Normally if something's in one history book, you can find references to the same subject in others, but I found absolutely zilch. Either this old legend wasn't deemed all that interesting by historians, or this was the cleanest historical whitewash I'd ever seen...not that I'd seen many.

I contemplated asking Celestia, but I'm sure I wasn't the first to ask her about it. The story makes a direct reference to her having a sister after all, that's not exactly a small thing! If I asked her...would she become suspicious of me? Would she brush it off?

Would she use mind magic to erase any memory of it?

I tend to have a standing order of thought when it comes to Celestia: assume she has mind magic, make room for the possibility that she uses it, do not let my guard down, and never test that theory. It's just safer that way. Mind magic had to come from somewhere, and while I doubt she's the source of such dark magic, back then laws were very different. Specifically, they didn't exist because other things were deemed more important. It wouldn't shock me if she learned it just as a defense against, well...ponies like me.

The very head of Equestria itself cannot afford to have her mind tampered with.

I needed more information before I ever even considered confronting her with this. I needed to do more research, ranging back over a thousand years. That meant really digging into the archives. Not that I had a problem with that, it's just that a pony spending lots of time in the archives tends to garner a lot of attention from ponies that might wonder where she's been...such as Celestia.

Still, I was apparently discreet enough to avoid drawing her attention to myself. Instead, the archivists just took a distinct interest in my subject matter, though they seemed amused by it. I guess I wasn't the first pony they'd seen researching a dead-end subject that'd been explored numerous times before, always to the same final conclusion.

Still, there was something there, I just needed to find it. Then I stumbled across information regarding the old abandoned castle in the Everfree Forest, once the lone bastion for all ponies seeking audience with the Sun Goddess. Ponies don't worship her now like they did back then, likely because she encouraged them not to over the years, but the fact remains that that's one of the few remaining structures that she once called home.

The Everfree Forest was a very dangerous place, however. Ponies went missing in or near it all the time, to the point that false rumors have become accepted as truth by many superstitious ponies out there.

'Ponies that go in, never come out!'

'The trees try to eat you!'

'The weather works all on its own there!'

Well okay, that last one is true. Still, that's the only one I put any stock in, and if that's all I really have to worry about as long as I'm well-prepared and careful, then this shouldn't be too difficult to manage. However, there was one large obstacle that got in the way of everything: I had no reason to go to Ponyville.

Sure, I liked to wander. I needed to in order to evaluate Mafia activities and keep myself up-to-date on everything, but ever since I became Celestia's protege, I've had no time to go visit Manehattan, or Trottingham, or the abysmal Stalliongrad. I've been doing nothing but schmultzing with the nobility and gaining a reputation in Canterlot as the most studious mare in Celestia's School for Gifted Unicorns, and I didn't even take classes there, Celestia was my teacher!

I needed a good reason to go there, and I had a good idea, but I had to have patience. This Summer Sun Celebration would mark the thousandth year since Nightmare Moon's banishment, so it all worked out...very conveniently. Suspiciously so. I brought up the subject of the Summer Sun Celebration with Celestia, and long story short, I worked it around so I'd be taking care of setting it up in Ponyville. Not like it was difficult, she trusts me implicitly, and she knows I'm capable. My organizational skills are unparalleled!

After that, it was just a matter of time. I prepared my things accordingly, made sure to pick up my standing prescription of painkillers, made sure to have everything I needed for Spike...hrm. Should I take him with? I wasn't sure. What I had in mind, it would've been bad to take him with, even though I'm very sure I could keep him safe, even in the Everfree.

I'm sure I could get a foalsitter if I really needed to. I was quite fond of having him around, especially when working on research projects.

When the day finally came, I was ready. The eve of the Summer Sun Celebration, and I was responsible with making sure everything was prepared and ready by the time Celestia arrived. Spike and I rode together on a pegasus-drawn chariot, the wind whipping through my mane while he laughed and spread his arms, as if he were soaring through the skies of his own volition! He almost seemed disappointed when we touched down in Ponyville, though the drastically different surroundings had his youthful curiosity piqued.

I looked around while the guards accompanying me waited for me to dismount from the chariot, their calm and relaxed posture betraying the coiled springs they both were on the inside. If anything came at us right now, they'd have us in the air in seconds and back to Canterlot within mere minutes. But, as I stepped down and evaluated my surroundings, I came to the very quick conclusion that we had little to nothing to worry about.

Ponyville. Idyllic, peaceful, and lacking the hoity-toity mentality of the big cities, it was the very definition of 'rural-as-fuck'. Cottage-like buildings interspersed with the occasional family business, like Quills & Sofas or that...bowling alley. Pins and Balls, maybe? That's what I'm getting from the sign over the door that has no actual words whatsoever. How the heck do they list themselves in the phone book?!

"Pink pony, over there!" Spike said, pointing at the fluff-maned pony coming our way without a care in the world.

She embodied the very essence of pink more than any pony had a right to, the mare looking like a cotton-candy-colored pony with a mane consisting of a much darker mass of the most fluffy and tangled candy floss you've ever seen. I could almost taste her sugary-sweetness from here.

Spike grabbed my attention by leaning down to rummage through one of the saddlebags on my sides, shifting the things I'd brought with to find the scroll I'd made with pictures of each of the five ponies I needed to check in with. Each of them had their own attractive features just based on physical appearance, but that wasn't my main focus at the moment. I'd check in with them, make sure everything was okay, and if nothing actually happened and everything went off without a hitch, I'd make a discreet excursion for a week to the old castle with Spike.

He unrolled the scroll and pointed to the picture labeled 'Pinkie Pie' on it, then pointed to the pronking young mare headed our way. "It's her!"

Indeed it was. I wasn't immediately sure because I hadn't memorized their pictures, but that was definitely Pinkie Pie. Oh, this should be fun, judging by the kind of energy she seemed to have. I approached her while she hopped my way, and even though her eyes were closed in a wide and genuine smile, she seemed aware of my presence in front of her, and she stopped, still hopping in place. Spike found it amusing, and laughed quietly while looking at her from over my wither.

"Hello, miss! My name is-" I tried to say, but her sudden interruption stifled my attempts at common courtesy.

A loud and excessively wide-mouthed gasp emitted from her, and I could swear in that single moment she actually sucked the oxygen from immediately around both of us. Plus, the way she was seeming to float in the air directly in front of me was a bit...disturbing, considering she's an earth pony. I blinked a few times and she suddenly darted away in the opposite direction where she'd come from, my mouth hanging open in utter bewilderment while Spike patted me on the side of my neck.

"She was strange." he muttered.

"Yes, Spike. Yes she was."

I shook it off and looked back to him with a smile. "So, that was Pinkie Pie, we'll check in with her later. Who's next on the list?"

He looked at the pictures and seemed to struggle with the name for a moment. A lot of ponies underestimated him because of his age, he was only four years old after all, no one would normally expect him to actually be a competent assistant by this point. I encouraged it, he really was enthusiastic about helping me, and since I home-schooled him in my free time, he and I spent a whole lot of time together every day. Really, he should be out and about finding himself a few friends of his own....

After a short few moments, he perked up with a smile. "Applejack! At, um...Sweet Apple Acres."

He was remarkably fluent for his age too! I had myself a little genius in the making right here!

It was easy to figure out where Sweet Apple Acres was, given it's the only apple orchard in the entire town. The distinct scent of freshly-tilled dirt and trees began to permeate the air as we stepped past the front gates, the distant sound of hooves clonking against wood able to be heard even all the way where Spike and I were. Then there was the scent of manure...eugh.

Many ponies consider us unicorns racist or unwilling to do hard work because we have a bit of an aversion to farms. That is incorrect. It's more accurate to say that we will do some of these things if we have to, we simply won't enjoy them the way earth ponies inherently do. We lack that connection to the ground that earth ponies have, we can't channel magic through our hooves and 'get a feel' for the grass and trees. Of course that's a generalization, I'm sure there are unicorns out there that don't have a problem working on farms. I just haven't met one.

Then there's some of the things that are necessary on farms. Like spreading manure over the crops. I mean, just...okay. I have spoken to cows before. They are intelligent, pseudo-sapient creatures, I have been on a farm or two before. Yet, they are completely gung-ho about us chugging down their milk that we tug out of their udders and spread their shit around our fields!

I would just really like to know where this relationship between earth ponies and bovines began. What earth pony approached some cows and said 'Hey there ladies, mind if I take the milk out of your udders and drink it while gathering your poop, processing it, and then muck-spraying it over my fields?' I mean I suppose we could just use our own crap, but...hm. Okay, I can't decide if that's more or less disturbing than using cow poop.

Even worse, what cows agreed to this?! There had to be experiments to determine if cow poop functioned as a good fertilizer, so what in Tartarus?! Don't even get me started on just how accepting all of us are about it either! Even I drink milk, it's just something I grew up with, and after visiting a farm for the first time I seriously considered swearing off of it. But then, chocolate milk. Plus Spike loves the stuff.

In any case, while I was lost in idle thoughts, someone approached us, waving all the way. Behind her, a fairly large homestead stood tall and weathered, but remarkably sturdy. I idly wondered how often they rebuilt parts of it, not to mention that huge barn in the distance, closer to the orchard. Somepony on this farm had to be a skilled carpenter to keep up with all this...either that or they outsourced, but knowing the Apple Family, I didn't consider that likely.

They were in that uncanny valley of fame, where everyone knew their name, but no one really knew anything about them because they're so huge and hard-working and perfect that they make for boring news coverage. Chances are you only really knew about them if you subscribed to certain magazines, and those magazines aren't largely popular in the big cities. I only knew about them because once upon a time, I traveled a ton.

I can guarantee that at some point in your life, if you've ever eaten an apple in Equestria, there's over a ninety-percent chance it was from an Apple Family orchard.

The blonde-maned mare that approached me could only be the one I was looking for. Spike made sure to point her out on the scroll, and I simply gave him a quick nod and turned my attention back to the pony trotting down the path to meet me halfway.

"Howdy there, ma'am! You that pony the Princess sent ta make sure everythin's good n' ready?"

Oh gawd, the accent. The accent was adorable! Somehow I don't think she'd appreciate anyone calling her that though, so I just shook it off while Spike gave her a quizzical look from over my wither. They stared at each other for the briefest of moments, and I looked between them before turning my body just a little to break her line of sight with him. I didn't like how she was just staring at him, okay?

She blinked and smiled at us. "Well whaddaya know? A lil' dragon!"

Spike kept hold of my mane while leaning off to one side, enthusiastically waving to her. "Hi!"

He'd grown quite accustomed to the fact that he was unique, and given no one really ostracized him for what he was, well...he had a bit of an ego, even at his age. He just soaked up the attention. I had to keep an eye on him in that regard, I couldn't let his greed get out of control at such an early age.

Applejack simply waved back at him. "Where'd ya get a cutie like him from?"

"Oh, I hatched him." I said, clearing my throat. "You're Applejack Apple, correct?"

"Eeyup! Head mare of Sweet Apples Acres, at yer service!"

I nodded and smiled faintly, holding a hoof out to her. "My name's Twilight Sparkle, and I-"

The sudden vigorous and rough jostling of my foreleg quickly changed my understandable speech into an unintelligible, rattling mess as my entire body began to shake under the sheer force of her hoof shaking my own.

"Nice ta meetcha, Twilight Sparkle! Yer just in time, the last of our family showed up earlier, and we've been busy cookin' up all the food for tomorrow," she said, turning and motioning for me to follow her. "Care ta come see?"

I nodded and we followed her to an open area between the house and the barn, several picnic tables laid out all over along with elderly mares sewing and numerous ponies working at cooking various delicious treats and foods. The smell in the air was overpowering, and my stomach growled in realization that, yes, I had not eaten breakfast despite preparing food for Spike, because he's a garbage-gut. Little chubster just wolfs it all down! Me, I just tend to not be hungry when I first wake up, or when my mind's pre-occupied with other things I've deemed more important.

It wasn't long before they noticed me, and then noticed my son. The Apple Family was massive! They began to crowd around Spike and I, fawning over him while he sat there on my back, wide-eyed and unsure of what to do under so many squee'ing adults. My guards opted to try to get them to back away, but it was still a huge crowd.

"A'right everyone, simmer down! Actin' like ya never seen a little kid before."

Applejack moved through the gathered crowd to give us some breathing room, much to my relief. Spike liked attention, but give him too much and he can really start getting nervous. Young, nervous dragons plus lots of soft, fleshy, flammable ponies isn't something anyone wants to be in the middle of.

I tried not to waste too much time there. I had a schedule to keep, but I'd learned very early in life that you must always be prepared for that schedule to be shattered where other ponies were involved. Given how eager the entire family was to have us stick around to try out their tasty treats, it was hard to say no to them.

Then little Apple Bloom happened.

Let's make something clear, I'm not some soft bitch. It takes a real tear-jerker of a sob story to make me truly give a shit, and even then I might just dismiss it entirely. Children are cute, but thanks to Spike I've built up quite a bit of disillusionment and tolerance for the raw adorableness they can convey, in their inexperienced naivete. But Apple Bloom?

Hnngh! Hnngh! Oh sweet Celestia my fucking heart! That's the kind of weapons-grade cute that makes veteran guards die from heart failure!

I had no choice but to agree, if only to save myself from the adorable onslaught that was Apple Bloom and her huge glossy eyes of adoracute doom and pouty lip of...pouty-ness. What? They can't all be zingers, sue me.

I couldn't keep track of all the plates that were presented to me, but let me just say that I think I've eaten enough apples to keep the doctors away for the rest of my life...wait. Wait, that sounded dirty without context. You know what I mean! Apple cobblers, apple pies, apple dishes that I think had no business having apples in them at all...so many apples!

Spike practically swallowed whatever was put in front of him. Lots of ponies think dragons just have some kind of magical furnace that burns up anything they eat, but that's obviously not true, they just have extremely powerful stomach acids that become chemically inert when they're exposed to open air. Watching him eat like he was though, I could see why most uneducated ponies would think that. I had to take him into the house to wash off his face and his scales before we left.

I sent the guards away after that, since they were still carrying my luggage, both of them heading back to the library. They resisted, it was their job to resist the idea of leaving their charge unattended, but ultimately they knew I could handle myself. I've sparred with them before. I could take them, let alone some hostile bumpkin in a small town!

Eating so many apple-filled foods had given me a stomachache, one I wish I'd had time to take a nap and sleep off, but I had a job to do and things to look into personally. Spike was just starting to catch a nap on my back when I suddenly found myself blindsided from behind by someone.

She was fast. I heard her coming even without any kind of warning, but even with my tweaked senses I couldn't get out of the way fast enough. Plus, I didn't want to send Spike tumbling off of my back by dodging away too quickly.

I barely managed to step back enough to mostly take the impact to the back of my head and neck. The sudden jostle made Spike cry out in alarm as his comfy, fuzzy napping spot fell out from under him, and I found myself front-first in a rather large puddle of mud and dirty water. I could feel a weight pressing down over my withers, pinning my face in the water, and my instincts made me buck and shuffle my hooves to push up.

She got off of me before I could really throw her off, and I pulled my face up out of the muddy water with an air-hungry gasp, sucking in a breath and panting heavily as my lungs rapidly caught up with my body's desire for oxygen.

She had the nerve to laugh. She actually had the ovaries needed to think it was okay to laugh at shoving Canterlot nobility into the mud! I may despise the nobility, but there are a few of them that actually do their fucking jobs like I do and serve the public instead of having it the other way around! The assholes get off scot-free and I get a faceful of mud. Sounds about right.

Guh, maybe this was a bit more exhausting than I thought. Then again, I was feeling drowsy from eating all that food and frustrated from having my entire schedule ruined. At least I managed to get myself under control before I exploded at her. That sort of thing's unpleasant for anybody. Plus, she was the next pony on the list I needed to meet with, and antagonizing her would've been a bad idea.

Then she flew up and grabbed a raincloud and doused both myself and Spike in cold water to rinse us off. Admittedly it worked, but now my suit and myself were both utterly soaked, and I didn't have a proper change of clothes on-hoof. Plus, I was still sitting in a puddle of slightly more watered-down mud now, which wasn't helping matters. Thank goodness I have spells that can-

"Oops! Guess I overdid it," I heard her say from up above, atop her cloud. "Um, lemme just...oh! Here we go!"

Oh, no. No no no no no no no-!

The sudden whirlwind gust around me began to whip the air around Spike and myself, and I quickly held him down with my magic so she didn't send him flying with her recklessness. I could feel the water getting sucked out of my suit and my fur, but not completely. All that pegasus magic at work, and it did a decent enough job. Not good enough, however.

My suit was still damp, my underwear was probably going to start chafing if I started walking around again, and above all else, being covered in moist clothes is just plain uncomfortable. I just gave her a dirty look while she snickered and covered her muzzle with a hoof.

...Aaand she was laughing again. What was so funny? Apparently Spike found it hilarious as well, since he fell off of my back laughing, though whether that was because of whatever was so funny at the time or if it was Rainbow's raucous laughter is up for debate. Also, he was covered in mud now. Grand.

I stepped calmly out of the mud puddle and took a few deep breaths before letting them out. Spike was still rolling in the mud, I'm guessing because the mud felt good on his scales. Dragons liked that sort of thing, it helped them keep cool.

I turned my ire towards the pegasus mare once again, before silencing my inner frustrations and pulling the scroll out of my saddlebag...which was also wet. Fantastic! Great! My horn lit up a bit brighter as a focused breeze began to swirl around me and through my fur and suit, making it billow just a little. Once I had myself positioned just right, I spread my stance out a little and made the breeze speed up, rushing through my clothes and fur like a blowdryer on steroids.

"So! Judging by your mane and tail," I said over the noise of the winds, unrolling the dampened scroll to quickly confirm who she was. "Youuuu...are Rainbow Dash."

The sudden bright and cocksure grin said it all, and some part of me immediately didn't like her. It's not very wise to judge anyone by first impressions, but I got the distinct impression that Rainbow Dash was the kind of pony you could take at face value. Time proved that I was both right and wrong in this assessment.

"THE one and only! Why?" she asked, fluttering into the air and getting in my face. The excitement in her eyes was palpable. "Ya heard of me?"

I pushed a hoof against her snout and urged her to back off, frowning. "Only once I was tasked with this job. I'm Twilight Sparkle, that is my son Spike," I said, motioning to the little dragon that was now playing in the mud. "And you have not done your job."

"Pff, what?! I'm the weather manager in this town for a reason, miss Twilight Sparkle," she exclaimed, fluttering up to grab her cloud and recline on it. "I'm just gettin' some stunt practice in before I get back to work. Nice perk of bein' in charge, know what I mean?"

"No, I don't, because I get my work done before I indulge myself in liesure activities, for the most part," I stated firmly, then shrugged. "But, whatever. It's gonna get done, right?"

She just gave me a dirty look. "Hey, I get my work done! Ponyville's got such a clean record of weather care since I became the manager, you could eat your dinner off of it."

I looked around at the sky, rapidly counting off over thirty-seven clouds lingering in just this aerial zone of Ponyville.

"Well, guess I'll take your word for it."

"Hey, what's that supposed to mean?!" she said, getting all flustered and in my face again.

I shrugged and pulled my cigar case out of the side pocket of my suit, examining it to see if any water got inside. "Nothing really. I just don't believe you, that's all. But, as long as it gets done, it's none of my business how you do things."

She didn't seem to hear that last part. Instead, she just snorted and got in my face again, which this time actually irked me.

"I could clear this sky in ten seconds flat, prissy-pants." she said to me, her words laced with venom. Clearly I'd struck a nerve.

"Prove it then."

She didn't even hesitate. One moment she was there, then she was gone, her contrail the only sign of where she went. Even Spike was paying attention as she bolted around the clouds, kicking and bucking and chopping them with her forelegs to make them dissipate and disperse. I was counting the entire time.

I was actually shocked when she finished at exactly ten seconds. Well, almost that is, but basically ten seconds. I restrained my awe and simply nodded to her, and she just gave me this smug smile, casually kicking the cloud she'd been reclining on earlier to scatter it into the air.

"See? What'd I tell ya?" she said, crossing her forelegs over her chest. "Ten. Seconds. Flat."

Years of experience in keeping my bucking mouth shut told me that telling her she was somewhere between five and ten milliseconds over would be a bad idea and just dampen the mood, so I simply smiled at her and nodded. Even I need to eat humble pie every now and then. Really keeps a pony regular, heh.

"Indeed, you're correct! You did manage it," I said, bowing my head to her. "I apologize for doubting you."

She rubbed the back of her head nervously, unwilling to meet my gaze. "Y-yeah, sure, it's fine. I know not everypony can be as awesome as I am, so it's not surprising you wouldn't believe me," she said, and I nodded in agreement. Then, to my surprise, she showed some humility as well, something I never expected from a pony like her. "Uh, I'm sorry for flyin' into you like that. Totally didn't mean to, I swear. We cool?"

I looked down at her outstretched hoof and clopped mine against it, nodding. "We cool."

Things went fairly well after that, though by the time my suit was dry, there were mud stains on it and Spike was...utterly covered in the stuff, wonderful. Rainbow had it under control though, got some permission to use a hose to wash Spike off from a nearby house, then pointed out where I could find the next pony on my list.

Conveniently, she was a seamstress. Someone I definitely needed if I was going to be wearing something even remotely similar to this around town. Then again, I had a spare outfit at the library that I could just change into, after a quick shower...yes, that would be a good idea. Spike could use a quick bath too, a proper one instead of a hosing.

With him sitting on my back and waving at ponies all the way, I headed for the rather unique library. Golden Oaks.

Author's Note

This took longer than I would've liked, but I'm moving into a new house, so...yeah.

For those that would like to know what song I was listening to when I came up with this story idea, just listen to this song:

Chapter 6 - Eternal Night (Pt. 2)

written by Fire Soul

The library itself was a lovely statement as to how bringing the three tribes together creates something magical. Well, sort of. Pegasi had nothing to do with this tree, but, you know what I'm getting at.

The history of Golden Oaks Library was a colorful one that went back about six-hundred years. Unicorns of the newly-formed Magus were still researching ways to increase the output of our growing agricultural efforts while the earth ponies toiled away in the fields, doing their best to make it all work. Food shortages were no longer a problem, but our exports weren't doing so great at the time.

Then some young unicorn named Flashy Fit got the genius idea of working with some earth pony farmers to figure out how to enhance their crops. He was no one of note really, a commoner who had a knack for magic good enough to get him accepted into the Magus. More an arcanist than a battlemage, though most Magus have to be capable of being either these days, and then some.

Up to that point, most unicorn scholars didn't really work with the other races on things magical in nature. They believed magic was their domain, no one else's, and no non-unicorn could ever understand how it worked. What they didn't realize was that it was the other way around: they needed to understand earth ponies.

Long story short, it took him a while, but he eventually cultivated a seed laced with a complicated array of magic that would grow with the seed itself. The end result was a mighty, massive oak tree that's only gotten bigger as the years have gone by. Golden Oaks Library. When he had presented his new spell, unicorns praised him and earth ponies embraced him. The spell was more of a miracle than he had ever expected it to be.

The trees and crops that grew with a more refined version of the spell placed upon them couldn't speak, but earth ponies could feel them easier. They could tell when individual plants were thirsty, they could cultivate the land to perfectly suit their needs, and they could more efficiently infuse their own natural earth pony magic into them. It was a revolution in agriculture that's still being thoroughly refined to this day.

Golden Oaks Library, however, was a prodigal accomplishment in and of itself. His original version gave it such vitality that, even with the inside hollowed out and carved into a huge home, the tree still lived. Enchantments to make it fireproof and more sturdy than normal held as if the tree were a living arcane sponge, crafted for the sake of embracing any sort of magic cast upon it.

I didn't know any of this at the time, mind you. So when I took Spike to the bathroom so we could both take a quick bath, I wasn't aware of the raw historical majesty I was residing in.

Unfortunately I didn't have time to be very thorough, so a quick wash for myself and a scrubdown for Spike would have to do. It wasn't until I got out of the bath that I realized just how messed up my mane was.

I looked down at Spike with a bemused smirk. "So that's what you were laughing at me about."

All I got were giggles in response.

I didn't have the time to really fix my mane, so I ran a brush and comb through it ramshackle until it at least looked somewhat alright. Not up to the true noble standard, but then I'm not in Canterlot. Fuck the noble standard!

And now...the suit. I kept spares of various colors, I even had a pinstripe one that was black and red with a matching fedora, though I didn't often diverge from my usual black with white undershirt. The blue suit I'd thrown in my suitcase wasn't bad or anything, I just prefer black. Blue just isn't 'me'. Insert goth joke here. It just doesn't capture the true darkness in my soul!

I had to be careful about Spike's curiosity regarding something I had buried down deeper in my clothes. Last thing I wanted him doing is picking up one of my .22s or, even worse, my revolver, and fiddling with it. Even though they're currently unloaded, I had two full boxes of ammunition along with them as a just-in-case, as well as a third box just for the kind of caliber ammunition my revolver took. He was smart enough...given enough time, he'd be able to figure out how to load them. Television didn't help in that matter, I'm sure he could figure it out just based on what he's seen actors do in movies.

The trip to Miss Rarity's personal business, once I had my suit back on, was fairly quick. Known as Carousel Boutique - though I'm not sure why since it didn't spin and it certainly didn't make jaunty little fair jingles - it was a shockingly gaudy and out-of-place building compared to the vast majority of the rest of the town. It would've fit in better in Canterlot, or the more dated neighborhoods of Manehattan.

However, since I'd fallen behind on my schedule, she was no longer there. Fortunately, I had a good idea of where she'd be. I had to pick up the pace, though. I was losing daylight and judging by the position of the sun in the sky, it was going to start getting dark in a couple hours.

Rarity had been given the job of decorating Town Hall, and judging by the colorful decor on the outside, she had quite an artistic mind! A bit dramatic as well, but that wasn't really a bad thing.

"Whatcha think, Spike? Think it looks good so far?"

"Uh-huh!" he said, jumping to his feet and holding up the now fairly dried-off scroll, unrolling it and pointing to the white-furred pony listed there. "She's rilly pretty."

I just smiled and nodded in agreement. "Yup, she is! Why don't we go meet her?" I said, pushing one of the double doors to the building open and stepping inside.

Even on the inside, Town Hall was looking rather snazzy! Judging by the tone of the mare standing in the center, cycling through various colors of ribbons, the job wasn't even close to done either. I glanced up at the numerous decorations and tools held in her magic and found myself a bit impressed, all things considered. Since she wasn't a Royal Guard or even a student at any mage's colleges, her overall magical power likely wasn't anything worth mentioning. But the amount of focus she had to have in order to hold so many things at once and manipulate them without even dedicating her full attention to the task...!

I suppose it could've just been attributed to the natural talent inherent in her cutie mark, but still, the average unicorn that could benefit from being able to do something like this isn't really capable of pulling off this kind of feat. She was exceptional, whether she knew it or not.

Oh, and she was absolutely gorgeous from polished and filed horn to brushed and shaved fetlocks, but that was obvious from the moment I laid eyes on her. Shame she put on so much make-up and eyeliner though, I could imagine her without all that and I think she'd look even better with a more au naturel presentation. Even that lovely styled purple mane was just magnificent, and really highlighted an already lovely visage!

Just as you might expect, her tail did the same for that plush ass of hers. Heh, like a pair of marshmallows, they looked so soft and perky...! I had the strangest urge to toss a bit at her backside just to see how far it'd bounce.

I'm a real ass-mare, in more than one way.

She seemed to be entirely absorbed in her work, so much so that even when Spike and I approached, and she turned with her side facing us, she still didn't take notice of us at all. I tried the age-old method of clearing my throat, and I didn't even get a flick of an ear to acknowledge that she heard me.

The moment I stepped up to her and tapped her on her wither though, she damn near jumped out of her skin and spun around to face me! Her eyes were wide with shock and she had to take a few deep breaths to steady her breathing, but other than that she seemed okay...aside from the vaguely dirty look she gave me.

"One should not sneak up on a lady like that!" she exclaimed, huffing and holding a hoof to her chest. "You nearly gave me a heart attack!"

I just smirked and shrugged a bit. "Bit of a health hazard when you get so absorbed in your work you cease taking notice of the outside world, huh? I tried to get your attention from a distance, but you weren't having it."

"Oh! Oh, I see. I apologize, Miss-hm?" she said, only to notice Spike peeking at her from over my wither. "Well, who might this be? Is that a dragon?!"

"Drake, actually. A drakeling, if you want to be perfectly accurate," I explained, standing still as she walked over to one side of me. "Spike, say hello to the nice lady!"

"Hullo," he said, giving that goofy kind of smile children tend to do when they have childhood infatuation welling up in them. "M' name's Spike."

The effect was immediate. Rarity d'aww'ed and Spike laughed as she sat down and squeezed his semi-pudgy face with her forehooves.

"Oh my goodness, he is adorable! Just look at his pudgy little belly and shiny, sparkly scales~!" she cooed, grinning happily while Spike fidgeted and laughed in her grasp.

I just nodded and looked back at him with a fond smile. "That's my son for you. I've had him since the day he hatched."

"Really? I've heard about something like that before, where-...oh my!" she said, suddenly coming out of her adorableness-induced fawning to give me her attention instead. "You're Twilight Sparkle? The Lady Twilight Sparkle, of House Sparkle?!"

"The one and only. Why?"

"You live in Canterlot!" she exclaimed suddenly, her eyes almost seeming to sparkle in the artificial indoor lights while she stared off into space. "The glamour, the fashion, oh the sheer sophistication of it all! I've always dreamed of living there!"

The words 'suck-up floozy' immediately entered my mind, only to be banished just as fast. She had the appearance and moved with the grace of a mare thoroughly trained with Canterlot noble standards, but the question was, did she teach herself or did her parents teach her? She did run her own independent business....

"I just can't wait to hear all about it! And you...you hatched a dragon egg! Something nopony's ever done before!" she said with a wide smile, trying to regain her composure in front of me. "Celestia's personal student, too. Goodness, you have quite the portfolio."

I was suddenly jerked back to reality when I felt her forehooves pressing against my withers, her muzzle inches from mine. I ducked back more out of alarm than anything else. I certainly wasn't embarrassed by her lips only being inches away from mine. Nothing of the sort.

"A-ah, well, while I would love to indulge your inquiries, and the praise is appreciated, I must stick to business for now," I said, clearing my throat. "I'm already behind schedule. Perhaps later, we can talk?"

"That would be wonderful," she said, her smile never fading. Seemed she had herself back under control. "I'd love to invite you over for tea sometime!"

"Sounds like a date!"

The rest of our conversation was all about what she'd gotten done so far, and what she had planned. It took around an hour. Unfortunately, that meant it was about five o' clock, and the sun was getting close to setting. Spike was overdue for a nap, but in Rarity's presence, he seemed all too eager to give her his full attention.

"Yer rilly pretty!" I heard him say, while he was sitting on her back.

"Aww, thank you darling! I do my best." she said, while floating him over onto my back once more.

I gave him a moment to steady himself and sit down before turning towards the door, giving her a simple nod. "We'll be going now. Thank you for your contribution to the Summer Sun Celebration."

We left without fanfare, and Rarity returned to her work before I'd even closed the door behind us. I took the time to tease 'widdle Spikey-wikey' about his crush while we made our way to the final destination of the day, not counting tracking down Pinkie Pie before it got too late. Hopefully she wouldn't be difficult to track down.

The path to Fluttershy's cottage and animal shelter went right past the orchard and a few other smaller farms that surrounded that side of Ponyville. I actually had to stop to converse with one Golden Harvest to figure out exactly where I was going. Soon we were pretty much on the outskirts of the town, walking right alongside the edge of the Everfree Forest itself.

I'm not one to really judge someone based on first impressions, but this Fluttershy must have a set of huge balls to go with her vagina just like I do, if she's willing to live so close to a place full of manticores and timberwolves.

When we finally reached our destination, the sun was already beginning to creep down over the horizon, and the lamps lining the pathways were beginning to start up to make up for the dimming light. The orange-red glow gave a kind of ideal tint to Fluttershy's entire shelter area, making it seem entirely like the most idyllic place one could live. Now if only it weren't for the overwhelming stench of various animals....

There was a loud chorus of birdsong whistling through the air, getting louder the closer we got to the cottage. It certainly wasn't the sort of thing that occurred naturally, given how harmonious the tune was...save for maybe a couple of birds. I'm pretty sure my acute hearing picked up at least three of them that were drastically off-key.

By the time we reached the source of all the music, only one bird was still having trouble, and the music had started once again. That was when I saw her.

I stared. I couldn't not stare. It was like seeing yellow and pink occurring naturally and realizing 'nature is magnificent and gorgeous'. I didn't even notice that I was walking closer to this source of sheer beauty until I felt Spike's claws pulling at the part of my mane running down the back of my neck.

What the fuck is a supermodel doing working with animals? Her picture on my scroll had to be outdated, it didn't do her justice!

"Er, excuse me, Miss-"

She damn near rocketed up into the treetops the moment my words reached her ears. Her wings flared in that reflexive fight-or-flight instinct we all had, followed by her spinning around to face me. All of her birds took off flying from being startled.

I would say that I'm noticing a theme, but so far it's just been her and Rarity that've jumped like frightened kittens. I wouldn't call that a theme so much as a coincidence, unless you count Pinkie Pie for some reason. She was certainly shocked by my presence, though the source of that shock is entirely unknown to me.

I watched her hide behind her long pink mane, luxuriously smooth locks hiding most of her face and one of her eyes from view as she turned away from me. I couldn't help but notice how adorable she was and how timid she was being and how can she make slouching look alluring?!

"...Alright then," I said, trying to regain my composure. "My name is Twilight Sparkle, and I'm here to check in with one Miss Fluttershy to determine the current state of the Summer Sun Celebration's musical arrangements. I assume you're the pony I'm looking for?"

I figured being more formal and business-like would help her open up to me, but I could barely hear her muttering behind her mane. She glanced over at me with her one exposed eye here and there, but for the most part she had trouble looking at me, let alone conversing with me. Then Spike leaned to one side and waved to her.

Her shy and reserved demeanor suddenly turned a full one-eighty on me, and she took to the skies with a wide gasp of delight. I stepped back a bit as she rapidly fluttered over to us, hovering over me and looking down at Spike with the most adoring eyes I've ever encountered.

"A baby dragon!" she squealed, landing next to me and staring at Spike with a wide grin.

It was Rarity all over again. She cooed and fawned over him for a time until I got her to give him some space. At least now she was willing to talk to me, instead of trying (and failing) to hide in plain sight.

"So...those birds sounded wonderful," I said, trying to get things back on track with her. "How'd you teach them to do that?"

She was still very timid and shy, but at least she didn't duck away from me like she did before.

"I-I told them how to do it..."

"You...told them? How does that work?"

She fidgeted a little, staring down at her hooves. "...I can understand them, and they can understand me."

I stared at her for a moment, my head slowly tilting to the side as I attempted to fathom such an absurd notion. Did she mean she was just really good at training animals, or was she being literal? I suppose, given how shy she is, she wouldn't have told me such a strange thing without totally being serious about it....

"Really? Huh," I said, clearing my throat and glancing around while Spike twiddled his claws on my back. "Forgive me if this sounds mean, but that sounds a bit unbelievable. I've never heard of a pony being able to actually converse with animals."

She looked my way for only a moment, and I feared she'd clammed up again. I looked around the area again and eyeballed several of the birds beginning to gather around us once more, and an idea sprung to mind almost instantly.

"Perhaps a demonstration is in order? Just to prove it to me?" I offered. "Honestly, I'm a bit curious now myself."

She just sat there for a moment, unresponsive. I tried to remain patient and give her time to gather her wits, but it seemed I needed to be insistent.

"I really would prefer a demonstration, Miss Fluttershy."

"Weren't the birds enough?" she asked suddenly.

I quickly shook my head. "Sorry, but I'd just like something more spontaneous. They could've been trained."

I'm sure she took offense to the idea that she might be lying, but I really did need to be sure. If she really could talk to animals and understand them, that's...well, I'm not sure exactly what that might mean, but I'd certainly wonder how many actually knew about this extraordinary ability and just said nothing to anyone.

She pawed at the ground with her hoof for a moment, then cleared her throat. "Aaaangel!" she called out. "Could you come here for a moment please?"

Mere moments later, a small white rabbit came bounding our way, summoned by the call of his caretaker. He stared at me for a moment, his little bunny nose wiggling as he sniffed the air to pick up my scent. He was kind of cute! Now if only he didn't have that scowl.

She spoke to him as if he were just another pony, and much to my shock he squeaked and chattered at her in return. She told him to do things in distinctly non-trainer-like ways, telling him to hop up onto my back and hop on Spike's head, then on mine, then back to her, and he did it all with...well okay, not zero complaints, just minimal complaints.

She repeated this demonstration with several other animals as we conversed, her interactions with her closest of friends seeming to help her loosen up with me. Not overly so, but enough that we could at least sit down and have a normal conversation.

Spike, during all of this, had made quite a few new friends once we'd made our way to her cottage. At first the little squirrels, rabbits, puppies and kittens were instinctively scared of Spike, but with a little reassurance from Fluttershy, they approached him. What happened after that was just...okay, why is my son so Celestia-damned adorable all the time? Seriously, they were swarming over him and running around playing tag with him all over the house! It was like watching him get assaulted by fuzzballs. Adorably cuddly fuzzballs.

"So, I guess you weren't lying! I apologize," I said as we both took a seat at her kitchen table. "I didn't mean to insult you."

"Oh, it's fine," she said, that soft voice barely audible over the clamor in the other room, but with my experiments with manipulating my own senses, I could make out what she was saying easily. "Most ponies don't believe me. They just dismiss the whole idea."

"Even the ponies in Ponyville? You must not talk to them much."

She just gave me a nod, and silence fell between us for a time. I needed to find something to talk about at the very least, just sitting here like this was already getting awkward. Then a devilish idea hit me, one I was already considering from the moment I got a feel for her personality, but now was a perfect chance to put it into motion.

I rarely do anything that may be of personal benefit to me on accident. I do not simply stumble upon fortune, I plant the seeds that will most likely bear fruit for me down the line, and I harvest them accordingly. Time for me to plant a seed and see what comes of it.

"So, what kind of work do you do to afford all this? Modeling?"

Her face lit up like a tomato, and she vigorously shook her head. "O-oh, no no, n-no I could never-I mean-!"

"Whoa, whoa!" I said, holding my forehooves up to try to calm her down. "Sorry, didn't mean to upset you! Just, you know, with the perfectly-groomed fur, the long silky mane and tail...I figured maybe you did photos or something."

Her blush didn't abate. If anything, I think it got worse, and while her lips were moving, no noise was coming out. Perhaps I'd gone too far?

I cleared my throat and shifted in my seat. "I feel I must apologize again. I'm sorry if I've made you uncomfortable."

"N-n-no, it's fine, I'm just...I'm not used to ponies just saying things like that about me," she muttered, sinking a little lower in her seat and hiding behind her mane once again. "Rarity says the same thing. She says I have a lot of natural beauty."

"Well, she's right! You're lovely." I said, a wide grin on my face.

Aaand seed...planted. She turned red as a quality tomato once more and cowered away from me, but she couldn't hide the small smile she was sporting! She liked the flirtatious compliment even if it made her twist around on the inside.

Unfortunately, I took notice of the time when Spike came in, rubbing his eyes and yawning. He was getting sleepy, and that meant that he needed a nap. I don't know what was going through my head at the time, probably frustration with having wasted the entire day just tracking these ponies down and being held up by some of them, but I'd let my guard down enough to get lost in just chit-chatting with Fluttershy, listening to her stories about her animal friends. Chiropractic work on a bear? I'd have to see it to believe it!

The sun was almost completely down outside, and high in the sky, the moon hung overhead. I stared at the mark adorning the surface, the Mare in the Moon, and something deep down inside of me became uneasy. It would've been easy to just dismiss it as nothing, but I trusted my gut, my paranoia. It hadn't failed me thus far. Still, I had nothing to go on...so I simply had to wait. Perhaps if I was lucky, nothing would happen at all.

Fluttershy opted to walk us back to the library, since I both didn't have the guards with me and I didn't know the exact way back from how far out we are. Plus it was getting dark out, and despite the big shiny moon in the sky, it was just safer to travel in a group, albeit only a group of three.

Along the way, I learned more about Fluttershy's history with animals. The story about Rainbow Dash and the Sonic Rainboom, how Fluttershy plummeted to the ground, unable to stop herself, only to get caught by a huge gathering of...butterflies. Okay, is the rest of the world outside of the big cities just one giant world of childhood whimsy, or is this a more recent thing? All the goodness got washed out of the big cities and the rest of the world is picking up the slack, maybe?

I vaguely remembered the Sonic Rainboom incident, myself. I recall being indoors when it happened. Made a deal go bad, I think it was...pony trafficking. I was there to make sure shit didn't go south, but everyone on both sides of the deal were really tense and nervous, probably from some of the recent cop activity in the area. They thought I was a rat because of how young I was! Then there was this big technicolor light flashing in from outside, and suddenly guns were drawn, I heard a few go off, and I began mashing ponies into the walls and ceiling with my magic!

I came back for a couple of them for later experimentation. Took some doing to get them back to my lab though. Five ponies tied up in a room, with me experimenting on their minds one after the other? Why don't you just give me a happy ending while you're at it, universe? I'm already having a fantastic time, may as well put a little cherry on top of that sundae! Even though I was like...eight, at the time.

Either way, we made it back to the library much quicker than when Spike and I had made our way to Fluttershy's cottage. Spike had already fallen asleep on my back, only jostled awake here and there from some faltering steps of mine. It wasn't exactly all that easy to see in some places. This town needed better nighttime lighting.

Fluttershy bid us good night, and I returned the gesture before stepping into the quiet of the library. It was dark, and the lights were out, so I had to light up my horn in order to see anything. That was when everything went bad. I swear I'm still getting palpitations from it to this day!

The lights suddenly flashed on throughout the library, and a loud scream of 'Surprise!' from numerous voices filled the tree. Old honed reflexes kicked in and, lacking anyone close enough to punch in the face and then bolt, I quickly surrounded Spike and myself in magic and teleported out of the library.

I know they weren't there now, but at the time all I could think of was that I'd walked into an ambush with Spike on my back, tommy guns and pistols glinting in the sudden and overwhelming lights. I was panting from the sudden surge of adrenaline, and as I surveyed my surroundings, I found a distinct lack of gunfire heading my way. Just a commotion inside the library and a shocked-awake dragon in the beginning stages of a full-on blubber-fest.

I quickly brought my drowsy charge around in front of myself and sat down, holding him in my forelegs and rocking him back and forth while cooing small reassurances to him. He was sniffling and letting out those little 'I'm going to cry and it's gonna be really loud and grating so you'd better not stop trying to make me not cry' hiccups, and I'd become so caught up in trying to calm him down that I didn't notice the library door opening.

"Ohmigosh, I'm so so so so so sorry!" someone called out to me.

A brief flash of anger shot through me, and I snapped my gaze up towards the door...only to see a few concerned ponies with party hats on their heads peeking out at Spike and I. Where did that-

"We didn't mean to scare you!"

I'm fairly sure I jumped five feet into the air when I heard that voice right next to me. I whipped my head around to give her the nastiest glare I could while Spike began to whimper anew in my forelegs. Much to my surprise however, she wasn't where I knew, for a fact, she should've been. She was supposed to be directly to my right.

Somehow, she'd gotten around to my left without even causing a gust of wind, for how fast she had to have been moving to get there. I would've been able to feel it on my fur at the very least, but there was just nothing!

"Oh geez, I'm still doing it! I'm sorry, I was just concerned because you just disappeared like BOOSH!" she said, hopping up on her hindlegs while thrusting her forelegs into the air. "Then you were out here and he was starting to cry and I totally didn't mean to do that, but-!"

I resisted the urge to punch her in the face to make her back off. Trust me, it's a very strong reflex when ponies surprise me and then keep on pushing it without giving me a proper chance to calm down, let alone scaring me once, catching up to me, and darting around me like a caffeinated five-year-old! Don't even get me started on how dark it is out! I couldn't even see her that well.

"STOP! Just...just give me a moment," I said, taking a few deep breaths and rocking Spike in my forelegs to help calm him down some more. "You scared both of us out of our skin, just about."

I quickly lit up my horn so I could get a better look at her. The moment her face came into view, I could see the genuine concern in her rather expressive face. I tried to restrain my volcanic magma that was my anger to a mere powder keg, and nodded once to her, taking a few more deep breaths for good measure to steady myself before speaking a single word.

"You're Pinkie Pie, I believe," I said slowly, gently floating Spike onto my back as I got to four hooves once more. "You're the one in charge of setting up the traditional party that's supposed to go all night long, if I'm remembering correctly."

She just nodded, glancing at Spike worriedly while Fluttershy rushed over to figure out what was going on. She'd probably heard the shouting and come running back. Personally, I found that surprising, she didn't seem like the type to go running towards commotions.

The pink pony simply nodded, seeming to be entirely different from how she was when I first met her. Gone was the pronking energy of a superequine party mare. Now she just seemed despondent from what her actions had wrought. Guess I couldn't leave her like that, and I'd barely even noticed Fluttershy consoling Spike right next to me.

"Yeah, it was supposed to be a big surprise to make you smile, because I'm everypony's friend but I didn't know you, so I figured it'd be a good idea to surprise you with this party instead of holding it at Sugarcube Corner like we usually do," she said, rambling on while the sound of a balloon deflating coincided with her mane and tail going flat and smooth. "I'm really, really sorry!"

Okay first of all, what the fuck just happened with her mane and tail? I'd be tempted to make a fart joke if it were just her tail, but her mane actually swished and wavered like it was blowing air out of itself! Just...what?! I don't...oh, fuck it. Really not important right now. I was fairly tired, Spike was definitely tired and needed some sleep, and I really didn't give a fuck about magical logic-defying manes and ponies at the moment.

"It's...fine, Miss Pie. I just don't react well to surprises like that," I tried to explain, glancing back at Spike. "Neither do young children who are half-asleep. I would, however, still like to participate...just as soon as I get this little guy to bed."

There were no complaints as I began walking toward the library with Fluttershy and Pinkie at my sides. Pinkie had cheered up at least a little, but she was still extremely apologetic. Fluttershy was just enthralled with her ability to soothe Spike's worries enough that he damn near fell asleep right in front of her. I certainly didn't mind, he needed to be put to bed anyways. It'd been a long day for both of us.

Various party-goers apologized as we entered, and I quickly put their concern to rest. Proclaiming I'd be back, I walked past everyone and headed upstairs with a curious Spike in tow. He grumbled and wobbled in my grasp as I floated him into a basket I'd bought a month prior to start getting him used to sleeping alone, and gently tucked him in with his favorite blanket.

Even now, with him all nestled in, he was very hesitant to sleep without me nearby. I laid down next to his basket and gave him a small nuzzle, laying my head down next to his while he grasped at the foreleg I extended over his torso. My horn lit up with a gentle glow while I hummed a soft lullaby for him, and I floated over the old Smartypants doll that used to be mine before things went...yeah. I had no further use for it, so why shouldn't I have passed it on?

As he dozed off, I cast a veil of silence over my bed and Spike's basket, rendering both of them deaf to the world. It would be bad form for me to sleep on the eve of the Summer Sun Celebration, but as I said before, it'd been a long day. Some sleep was in order. Plus, my hindleg was aching again, and another one of my painkillers would make me pretty drowsy.

Still...there was a party going on downstairs, and I didn't want to be a party-pooper. Maybe just a couple drinks and some good company would help me relax a bit.

I laid there, watching my son fall asleep in front of me, and when I felt his breathing become more rhythmic and peaceful, I carefully extracted my foreleg from his grip and sat up, replacing my foreleg with Smartypants as smoothly as in a Daring Do novel.

I heard the door to my temporary room crack open, the noisy creaking only heard out of one ear until I stood up, my head slipping out of the veil just in time to hear someone peeking their way into the room, the thrum of the party music downstairs seeping in through the doorway.

"Everything alright in here?" I heard Pinkie ask, her cautious smile barely visible around the edge of the door.

I calmly stepped away from Spike, leaving him to his slumber. "Yes, everything's fine. I cast a veil of silence over him to block out incoming sounds, so you don't have to worry about keeping your voice down."

"Huh. You can do that? That's pretty nifty."

Rainbow Dash came waltzing in, a cup of cider in her hoof as she pushed the door open all the way. She seemed at least slightly tipsy, but not so much that she was really off-kilter. Just more liberal with her tongue, as most that imbibe alcohol are wont to do.

"Dang it, Rainbow! Mind yer manners more, wouldja?"

Aaand there was AJ. Then Fluttershy, and Rarity. What were they all doing here? Rarity and Fluttershy seemed entranced by the cute sight of Spike calmly snoozing away in his basket, though I urged them not to get too close for fear of entering the veil of silence and waking him up. Rainbow just knocked her drink back while AJ stayed at her side, just in case the cider really got to her.

Pinkie just began to hop up and down in front of me, grinning and urging me to come downstairs to join the party. I didn't resist. Really, I was just confused as to why they were all rather insistent on coming up to see me. Then again I suppose I was the new mare in town...or well, they thought I was a mare, and that was perfectly fine with me.

The party entered full swing now that everything seemed to be okay, and I wasn't shy about taking various ponies as dancing partners. I tend to suck horribly at dancing when I'm left to my own devices, but I've danced enough to know how to keep in-rhythm with my partners. Not that these rural folk knew any intricate dance moves, the most complex it got that night was a few twirls, courtesy of myself, Rarity, Fluttershy and Pinkie, who seemed to just know all sorts of bizarre dances. To this day, I'm convinced she made up almost all of them.

About two hours later though, I took my leave and headed back upstairs, letting Rainbow Dash know I was going upstairs. Applejack was staying close to her, keeping her away from the alcohol as much as possible, since it wouldn't be appropriate to show up a bit sloshed when Celestia raises the sun in such a glorious display. I assumed that by telling her the others would eventually find out as well, and since I was really starting to feel the fatigue, I didn't feel bad about just kinda disappearing from the party like that.

I didn't go to bed immediately though. I was still wound up and feeling at least a little sweaty from all the dancing, so I hopped in the shower, gave myself a quick scrubbing, then threw my undershirt and my pants and underwear back on. What? I had spare clothes, but just enough for the week, I hadn't brought a bunch of extras! I needed to make it last, after the mud puddle incident earlier.

I retrieved my metal cigar case from the pocket of my suit top and grabbed one of them from inside of it, tucking the case away once more and heading out onto the library's upper floor patio. I shot a tiny bolt of fire from the tip of my horn to the end of my cigar and brought it to my lips, biting off my end of it and spitting it out over the guardrail. I took a long, deep drag and felt the smooth cherry-scented smoke filling my lungs.

I'm not any kind of connoisseur of cigars, mind you. I went with them because they're at least better smelling than cigarettes and cause significantly less ill disgust whenever I have to pick up their scent. Why did I take up smoking? Two words: stress relief. However, I made the mistake of trying out some particularly expensive cigars on a few occasions, and then finding a way to buy some of my own.

Now I buy cigars that cost approximately twelve bits each. I buy them in cases of twenty. I'm just thankful I don't smoke very often, or else this would be an atrociously expensive habit. Besides, if I really wanted a cheaper alternative, I'd just smoke weed all the time. Stuff can fuck with your long-term memory over years of steady use, but damn if it doesn't really help mellow me out!

I tend to get lost in thought when I'm enjoying one of my cigars. Usually I'm always keeping myself busy with something at least a bit important, thus I always had something to focus my thoughts on, and this time was no exception. I stared up at the moon, my physical motions with the cigar on auto-pilot as I just sat there with my upper half leaning against the guardrail...thinking about the Mare in the Moon.

How lonely must she be up there, in the silent vacuum of space? No sounds, no one to talk to, only the memories of those she once knew, now long gone...it sounded awful. At least a pony stabbing you is a death you can face. Being sealed away from pretty much every living thing in the world...that's like a death of the mind and soul.

That's assuming she's been awake all this time, staring down at us in what had most likely become a mad rage...well, if alicorns really succumbed to madness the same way us normal ponies do, anyway. Also assuming that she was real, though at this point I was suspicious enough to believe that there was a strong possibility of it.

I just kept delving deeper into random thoughts about the Mare in the Moon after that. Where did she go to the bathroom? Was she even capable of such a thing after a thousand years of no sustenance of any kind? Was she even still alive after all this time on the moon? Numerous thoughts.

Eventually I felt the siren's call of bed in my eyes, and I snuffed the fiery heat in the end of my cigar and carried it back inside, slipping it back into my case. Not smart to waste expensive cigars, even if it's three-fourths gone. I checked the door to my room and secured the lock before slipping out of my clothes and crawling under the covers of my bed. I think I was out the moment my head hit the pillow.

I awoke with a start, feeling someone shaking me in my sleep. Once again, my natural reflexes almost kicked in, but I snapped my eyes open and, against every instinct my life had hammered into me, took a moment to take in who was jostling me around. Of course, it was Pinkie, and I had to consciously force the tension out of my body before I did something bad.

Wait...wasn't my door locked? How did she-? Oh, fuck it. I was too tired to give a shit.

In any case, it was just her, and she was trying to wake Spike and I up because it was time for everyone to gather at the meeting hall. I rushed into the bathroom to give my mane a quick brushing, swished some mouthwash around in my muzzle, then headed out with a sleepy Spike on my back. Neither of us really got enough rest, but by the time we got there, I was awake enough.

Ponies were crowding into the meeting hall en-masse, even though the moon was still high in the sky. It was giving off an unusual amount of illumination, but I held my paranoia at bay for the time being. I made sure to give the Mare in the Moon up there a nasty glare, however. That was when I noticed it.

The Mare in the Moon was gone.

Oh no don't worry, it was totally fine. I was completely cool about it. I wasn't freaking the fuck out on the inside! Why would I do that?! I was only dealing with the sudden realizations that one, the story about an alicorn that plotted to doom the world to a permanent starving, freezing death and thus getting sealed in the moon was actually true, and two, she was no longer where she was supposed to be. No big deal at all!

I suddenly became very aware of just how naked I was in regards to weaponry. Still, at least when I showed up at the meeting hall, the two guards assigned to me had already showed up. We exchanged brief greetings, but they both expressed concerns regarding the fact that Celestia's escort was noticeably missing.

I quickly told them to do a once-around the meeting hall before heading inside with me, and I calmly waited with Spike on my back. He seemed unnerved by the missing image in the moon as well, once I pointed it out to him anyways, and he nestled in against the back of my head and neck while we stood there waiting.

That gave me an idea though...but it was only a guess. What if Nightmare Moon didn't know that her imprisonment caused a mark to cover the moon? If she wasn't aware, then acting suspiciously wouldn't be to my benefit. Tipping her off to the fact that I knew who she was could work, but...ugh, I was overthinking it again. The same rule applied: without anything to work off of, I could only wait to see what would come, and plan appropriately. I lacked any other way to get information, so it would have to do.

When they returned with nothing to report, we headed inside, and they fanned out behind the crowd while I waded into the crowd, moving closer to the front where the ponies I'd gotten more familiar with the previous day were all gathered close to each other at. Well, the majority of them anyways. Fluttershy was off to the side of the stage, with all of her bird friends roosting nearby, ready to sing for our glorious omnipotent ruler. Rarity was waiting up on the balcony, prepared to pull the curtains back to reveal her to everyone in dramatic flair.

"Isn't this exciting?! Are you excited? 'Cuz I'm excited-"

I rapidly tuned Pinkie's ramblings out after giving her a cursory glance out of the corner of my eye. I could easily see her becoming the most annoying pony I've ever known. I mean, aside from Blueblood. Annoying in a more 'please stop talking' way rather than 'oh sweet Celestia if you don't die right now I'm going to kill myself'.

The birds began to tweet and chirp in a harmonious tune to Fluttershy's hoof motions while Mayor Mare walked out on the stage. Being totally honest here, Mayor Mare looks fucking fantastic for an almost-forty-year-old. Seriously, I'd hit that ten different ways if given the opportunity. Just...mmm! Lemme just grab that body for a moment and show you you've still got it honey, c'mon over here...!

Guh. Ahem. She was talking, right, very impolite to tune out on everyone like that. I should pay attention, especially since she was currently in the process of revealing Princess Celestia behind the curtains. I waited tensely while Spike pressed just a little closer to me, both of us dreading what might be back there.

The curtains were pulled back with just a tug of a rope, and the spotlight overhead panned over the balcony to reveal...nothing. Just Rarity, standing there just as shocked as we were that the Princess wasn't where she was supposed to be. There seemed to be a bit of that going around this morning. I glanced to my two guards cautiously, and they both met my gaze, the two stallions visibly tensing and holding their spears closer to themselves. The absence of Celestia's Honor Guard only made the situation worse.

My guards began to move out of sight, trying to find an inconspicuous way to get up to the balcony while Rarity began to walk behind the curtains to have a look around for herself. I quickly took notice of the welling unrest in the crowd, which was already wound up enough despite most of them staying up through the night in celebration. I reflexively looked back at Spike to make sure he was right where he should be, fearing he might get lost in the crowd otherwise.

The mayor quickly urged us to calm down, since there just had to be a logical explanation for all of this. I'm sure there was, but whether it was acceptable to everyone was another matter entirely.

"Ooh, I love this game!" I heard Pinkie call out, looking around the hall with the eagerness of a child. "Is she hiding?!"

I don't...I'm not gonna question it. She's one weird, immature little mare.

Fortunately, Rarity stepped out onto the balcony again. She seemed confused and alarmed, and in her situation, I know I'd be confused too.

"She's gone!" she semi-shouted out for all to hear. The collective gasps of the crowd rapidly welled into a budding panic that Pinkie seemed completely immune to. Leave it to her to go against the grain...or, y'know, be completely oblivious.

"Ooh, she's good!" I heard her say. I'm pretty sure she legitimately thought the Princess was hiding somewhere.

Then the dark, starry mist showed up, making Rarity back away reflexively as it coiled around itself and swirled atop the balcony. I could feel the magic in the air coalescing into that sparkling mist, only to burst outward in a...well, surprisingly anti-climactic show of a more taxing transmogrification spell. At least, I think that was what it was. It certainly wasn't parlor tricks that brought Nightmare Moon to the balcony.

"Oh, my beloved subjects~!" I heard her say, her voice laced with the kind of false enthusiasm I found being vomited from the mouths of ill-intent nobles almost every day. "It's been so long since I've seen your precious little sun-loving faces."

"What did you do with our Princess?!" I heard Rainbow say, just before Applejack restrained her from charging head-first into what would likely have been a very brief and very painful encounter for her.

Rarity's statement that she was gone, and Rainbow's curiosity as to what Nightmare Moon had done with Princess Celestia must've meant that Celestia had shown up at some point, likely while I was asleep. That meant Celestia wasn't just on her way, she was here and she disappeared, coinciding with Nightmare Moon's appearance. Not good no matter which way you slice it.

"Mmm-hm-ha-ha-hah~!" she liltingly chuckled, gazing down directly at all of us, though I purposely stepped closer to the larger part of the crowd so I didn't stand out quite so much. "Why? Am I not royal enough for you?" she asked, her eyes narrowing just slightly. "Don't you know who I am?"

I was going to say something, but Pinkie quickly beat me to it.

"Ooh, ooh! More guessing games! Um-"

Oh sweet Celestia, Pinkie, don't.

"-Hokey Smokes! How 'bout...Queen Meanie!"

Someone's gonna die right here in front of Spike, and if I'm being totally honest about it, she was asking for it. She really was.

"No! Black Snooty! Black Snooty!"

Pff-okay, that one was actually kinda funny.

Applejack mercifully shoved an apple (or was it a cupcake?) in Pinkie's muzzle to silence her, and I restrained the desire to sigh with relief. At least she wasn't a big black scorch mark on the floor yet. I really didn't want Spike exposed to that sort of thing. Preferably never, but he was going to outlive, well...all of us, outside of Princess Celestia. Best to actually sit him down and talk to him about the inevitability of death rather than have it come up one day out of nowhere.

The irritation and malice in her eyes was unmistakable as she moved over towards Fluttershy, that false smile of hers fading ever-so-slightly. I tensed at the sight, those teeth of hers only on partial display, but I could see them well enough to make out the predator-like sharpness to them. Those weren't an herbivore's chompers.

"Does my crown no longer count now that I've been imprisoned for a thousand years?"

She turned her attention to Rarity next on her other side, that starry ethereal mane of hers curling like an extra limb under Rarity's chin, flowing in gentle undulations, not unlike a leaf fluttering in a light breeze.

"Did you not recall the legend?" she asked, flicking Rarity's chin up with her mane. "Did you not see the signs?!"

I wanted to confront her. I wanted to rush in and start getting ponies to panic so they'd get out of the meeting hall. I didn't have the resources or the time to coordinate them all, so a panic would be the only quick way to do it. But first, I needed to make sure Spike was safe.

He was cowering against me. Nightmare Moon terrified him, and understandably so. He was only four years old, and she was already menacing enough to me. I could only imagine how much she was freaking him out right now.

By now, AJ had gotten Rainbow to keep her hooves on the ground for now, though Rainbow looked just as ready to get up close and personal as I was. Perhaps I had been a killer, murderer, twisted torturer and many other things over the course of my life. Some of them, I can still claim the title of...but then, I am also Lady Sparkle of House Sparkle. I am still Celestia's protege. I had a duty to use my cunning, my knowledge and my magic to protect those around me. That started with getting everyone in this hall out of here before things got a bit too heated.

I shifted over side-to-side with AJ and looked back at Spike, quickly urging him over onto her back with my magic. He resisted at first, but the look on my face brooked no argument, or at least I think so. He could've just as easily been too scared out of his wits to protest. Applejack gave me a confused look, her eyebrow quirking up at me as I leaned over towards her.

"I need you and Rainbow to start ushering ponies out of here, and I need you to take Spike back to the library. Can you do that for me?" I asked as quietly as I could.

Unfortunately, like trying to lean over in your seat to whisper the answers to a friend during class, Nightmare Moon's attention snapped over to us the moment I was halfway done speaking.

"You dare to show such blatant disrespect before your new Queen?!" she called down at us, her wings spreading out menacingly at her sides.

I quickly gave Applejack a few firm pats on her chest with a hoof, and she took the hint. She backed off into the crowd around us, but Rainbow didn't seem to catch on. Not at first, anyways. I think she got it when AJ bit onto her tail again and gave it a rough tug, pulling her into the crowd as well, to the tune of a lot of protest from the rainbow-maned mare.

"No! Not at all, your majesty. At least, disrespect wasn't my intent," I quickly said, stepping forward with a small smile. "I was simply informing my companions that I'm well aware of who you are."

"Oh? The same companions that are retreating with the baby dragon you had on your back?" she asked, laughing at the brief instant of surprise in my expression. "A bit difficult not to stand out with something as rare as a dragon using you as a seat, and a fashionable suit on your body among a plethora of naked ponies. I saw you the moment you arrived."

She circled around me while the crowd behind me backed off, looking me over while I stood there as calmly as I could. Oh, what I wouldn't do to be able to finish my cigar off right now. Just something to calm my nerves. Sadly, no such luck.

"But, that matters little," she muttered, standing in front of me and leaning in a bit closer, those razor-sharp teeth showing through a small grin. "Who, pray tell, am I, little pony?"

I met her gaze stoically. "You're the Mare in the Moon, Nightmare Moon."

"Hah, such enthusiasm! I would dare to say that you're nonplussed," she said, looking me over a bit more closely, causing me to step back to put some distance between us. "I assume you know why I'm here then."

"Oh, you mean dooming us all to a slow, freezing, starving death by banishing the sun and ruling us through your eternal night? Yes, I'm very aware."

"Yet, even in my presence, you guard your fear well. But it's there..." she said, lifting a forehoof and tapping it against my chest. "Right there, deep in your heart."

"I'm a living creature that would prefer not to stop living for any reason," I said, smirking a little and staring up at her. "I think fear is natural."

She stared into my eyes for a moment longer, then laughed right in my face, her tail swatting the side of my head as she spun around to walk away from me. I almost didn't feel it, given how soft her 'fur' seemed to be. I could hear someone easing the meeting hall doors open behind the crowd, and I thanked my lucky stars that this was working. At least, I thought it was.

"As it should be!" she said, for all to hear, her voice seeming to reverberate through the hall. "I grow strong from your fear! It causes the sweetest nightmares for me to enjoy. So utterly delectable, you ponies are."

I risked a gaze up to where Rarity and Fluttershy were, but I didn't see them. Hopefully they already left out the back entrance, if one even existed. Maybe a window? Not the most dignified route of escape, but certainly acceptable given the circumstances. I glanced back at the crowd and noticed it was thinning closer to the door, not quite noticeable yet, but at least some progress was being made.

Wait...where were my guards?

"Seize her!" I heard Mayor Mare call out, pointing a hoof at Nightmare Moon. "Only she knows where the Princess is!"

My heart dropped out of my chest when I saw both of my guards lunge for her. It was the stupidest possible thing they could've done, but with Mayor Mare suddenly calling for action, well...they were trained to not let a civilian, even one in a high position, remain the focus of an enemy.

Nightmare Moon didn't seem to like that one bit. She turned to her left to face them both, her eyes glowing with a powerful light while her horn began to light up with raw mana. I could feel it from where I was standing, and for an instant, I feared she had prepared a seventh-tier spell just to make an example of them.

"Stand back, you foals!"

The lightning that arced from her horn was nigh-instantaneous, but I could tell it wasn't a more lethal spell like it could've been. She casted it far too fast for it to be particularly life-threatening, but when it hit them, their armor sparked and fizzled and the juttered in place before crumpling to the floor, letting out weak groans of pain as the electricity continued to cause small spasms throughout their bodies.

Panic erupted in that moment. First a few screamed, then moments after the entire meeting hall was screaming, ponies galloping around trying to get out the door. It was shoved wide open and they all began to filter out, that old herding instinct kicking in. They'd probably be running through the town for a while before they all realized the danger had passed, or had been left behind.

I lit my horn and grabbed the two guards while Nightmare Moon was briefly disoriented by the sudden surge of her attack. Alicorn or not, using a third-tier offensive spell like that without properly constructing an array can cause quite the backlash, and the fact that she was still standing steady and able to see straight was a testament to just how experienced she really was. Regardless, it still gave me an opportunity to get my guards to safety behind me.

She turned to face me, the malice in her eyes and the razor-sharp glint of her teeth becoming all the more apparent to me as she stalked towards me, her head held at a low forty-five degree angle, a standard for magical combat. Horn forward, eyes on your target, and all that.

"You would dare to defend those that stand against your new Queen?!" she growled, the screaming panic beginning to die down as less and less ponies lingered in the meeting hall.

I had already begun to weave an array in my mind when I heard hooves galloping in behind me. I risked a look back out of the corner of my eye and saw Applejack running in behind me, hefting the two guards onto her back. There was some visible strain on her from their combined weight, but she was definitely tougher and stronger than she looked.

"Mom?!"

I froze in utter terror at that voice. Forgetting my situation, I snapped my head around to lock my gaze on the little dragon standing fearfully at the meeting hall doors. He had a hand on one of the big doors for support, and he just stared at me with tearful, shimmering eyes. Looking back on it...I'm proud of him for having the guts to stand in the face of fear and spit on it just because he's worried about his Mother.

"So, ponies are taking to adopting baby dragons now? Hmph, and here I thought he was merely a familiar," Nightmare Moon said, seeming to care little about Applejack rushing out with the guards on her back. "Of course, that just makes you all the more interesting, little unicorn."

I quickly turned my attention back to Nightmare, crouching low and lighting up my horn as she drew closer to me.

"Applejack, get him away from here!!" I shouted, digging my hooves in and preparing for a scuffle I probably wouldn't be able to win.

Of course, that didn't mean the idea didn't excite me. I love a good scrap!

"What might your name be, little suit-wearing pony? One who would not flee at the very sight of nightmares given flesh?" Nightmare asked me, that unwavering, judging gaze of hers shining down on me.

I straightened up a little and let the magic die down in my horn. I honestly expected an attack from her right that moment, but she seemed...confident. A little too confident, if you ask me. I knew she was an alicorn, but c'mon, I had a chance! A slim chance!

"Twilight Sparkle," I said, clearing my throat. "Lady of House Sparkle, and Princess Celestia's personal student."

There was a sudden recognition in her eyes, followed by an almost snake-like delight, the way she smiled at me.

"Ah, so that is why you are vaguely familiar!" she gushed. "Many dreams have been filled with your visage, quite a few of them on the more risque side. Such power in you, other unicorns can't help but find you attractive."

"Oh, I'm aware," I said, waving it off. "Sometimes I even entertain their desires."

"How very noble of you." she muttered flatly.

I shrugged a little. "Mares have needs."

"How very non-noble of you," she said with a small laugh. "Not that I fault you for it."

"Speaking of dreams," I said, pulling my cigar case out of my pocket and looking it over briefly. "How did you view them from your prison? I would've assumed Celestia made sure you had no way of touching your subjects."

"Hah! She could seal me away, but the realm of sleep is my domain. She could not stop me no matter how hard she tried."

It made sense, all things considered. Even if someone were lucid enough to identify her in their dreams, they'd just chalk it up to old mare's tales and Nightmare Night shenanigans. It'd take a real stretch of the imagination to think that your dream version of Nightmare Moon was the Nightmare Moon.

"A small curiosity for myself," Nightmare suddenly said, sitting down and giving me a once-over. "Why were you not bothered by the thought of others dreaming about you in an erotic fashion? Most would be appalled."

I hah'ed and turned my side to her, striking a more sensual pose, my back arched slightly and a foreleg lifted off the ground, displaying my more feminine features to her.

"I'm in the spotlight a lot, your majesty. Why wouldn't somepony have fantasies about all this?" I asked, a cocky grin spreading across my muzzle.

She was enjoying herself, far as I could tell. Good. I needed to keep her talking. Keep her occupied, keep her distracted from everyone else. I had to get as much information out of her as I could. She asked about my cigars, my crippled leg, various other things. In doing so, I learned that she'd banished Celestia to the sun, and she knew little about modern society aside from the more modern methods of speech.

"You are most entertaining, Lady Sparkle! Enough that I won't kill you for your earlier transgression. On the contrary," she said, standing up once more and walking away from me. "If you swear fealty to me, I will make sure your life is a comfortable one."

"My life is comfortable enough," I responded, standing up and tucking my cigar case away once more. "Deepest apologies your majesty, but I cannot pledge myself to your rule. You intend to kill everyone with your eternal night, and you're inadvertently threatening my son's life by doing so. Ponies don't tend to get away with that, when I catch wind of it."

"Ah. A shame, verily," she muttered, turning to face me once more. "But I believe you will change your mind, given enough time. If not for yourself, then for your son's sake."

"And now you're threatening my son directly. I think I'm done talking to you, because now I really want to bounce your head off the floor."

"Resorting to violence now?" she asked, a small smirk adorning the corner of her mouth. "I would not expect it from a pony of your intellect and worldly experience."

"Violence is its own language, I've realized. So come on," I said, pushing myself up onto my hindlegs and shifting my stance, my forelegs raising up to protect myself. "Let's have a nice, bloody conversation."

"Ah-hah! As tempting as it may be to teach you your place, I would break you in seconds." she said, the bemusement in her tone only managing to irk me.

She wasn't wrong. If she was anything like her sister, she had the benefits of all three pony races in her. Unicorns aren't allowed to spar with earth ponies in the Royal Guard for a very good reason: earth ponies would snap us in half. Her? I think she'd liquefy my bones if she got a good hit in on me.

"However, if you are so intent on resorting to violence..."

Her fur and mane blackened rapidly before my eyes, before dissipating and dissolving into the air. She rapidly turned into a black smoke, her eyes the final thing visible on her body before they closed and she became a large starry black mass of ethereal gas. It churned and spread through the meeting hall, forming a large circle around me and obscuring the windows and the door from my sight.

Out of the wispy shadows it formed, I saw a pony step out into the artificial lighting overhead. The bright pure white of its eyes contrasted with the sheer black fur covering the pony's body, the batlike wings resting at its sides flaring as it stepped towards me. It could only be one thing, and three more were quick to join it.

Arcane constructs. Dangerous opponents in the right hooves...and sadly, Nightmare's hooves proved quite capable of pulling their strings like a master.

They are fairly stupid constructs that only get stupider the more you make, since you have to split your concentration between them to give them steady orders and even directly control their movements. However, you are only one pony, and one mind. We are not built to control more than one body at a time, though training yourself to multitask can really help to make them more effective. Instead, those you aren't directly controlling have to be given basic instructions that the artificial mind they're built with can follow to the best of its ability.

What's more deceptive about them is how alive they look. Make no mistake, there is no soul, no consciousness residing within them, and their bodies are nothing more than magic given physical form with a fairly complicated array. Though, looking more closely at their movements, the array Nightmare was using was likely primitive...perhaps she hadn't learned any more modern tricks?

"I will indulge your desire. Now, entertain me!"

I hopped in place a few times to test my bad hindleg while they rushed me, the four constructs spreading out away from each other to circle around me. Once I was sure my hindleg wouldn't immediately give out on me, I lunged at one of them as soon as it got close enough.

They weren't fighting on their hindlegs, like me. It wasn't uncommon for ponies to fight like I do, but my more unique mixing of styles is far from normal, melding the compact, focused skills of minotaur boxing with the Neighpon style of judo.

Ponies and zebras can manipulate things in the same way minotaurs and griffons do with their hands and claws, we just need to be able to touch that thing with our hooves. Known as tactile kinesis, we can manipulate anything we can touch with our hooves via magic that spreads over the object, invisible to the naked eye. It functions similar to how unicorns can reach out with their horns to grasp things from a distance, except, well...yeah, there's a reason it's called tactile kinesis.

The downside is that that ethereal grip is nowhere near as reliable as a flesh-and-blood hand, though it has the advantage of being able to shape itself however you desire. Muscle, sinew and bone have limits that can be built upon and can be reliably counted upon, and a pony's grip with their hooves pales in comparison to a minotaur grappling something. It's weak when compared to other races in other words. Still, we can hold guns like minotaurs do and use quills, pens and other things without absolutely relying on our mouths, so...net gain overall for ponykind, I guess.

However, most ponies dismiss it as unreliable and still use their mouths, something the educational system still hasn't addressed, much to my disappointment. I learned to train it to be stronger, and more useful to me, since I couldn't count on one of my hindlegs for the usual guard tactics of bucking and kicking. I needed something that would focus on the use of my forelegs for offense and my hindlegs for mobility and leverage. Boxing and judo both stood out to me.

Sure, I could've just carried a spear around with me everywhere, but that's not exactly acceptable, is it?

So when I suddenly wound up in front of the construct charging me, then weaved to the side and hooked my right hoof under its chin and pulled it backwards mid-charge, I think both Nightmare and the construct were taken by surprise. It was forced to rear up, and I pulled further back, stepping around behind it and getting both of my forelegs around its neck.

The other constructs halted and watched, their plan to flank me instantly shattered as I curved one foreleg under its neck and twisted hard to the left. A resounding crackling snap issued forth, a sound akin to hearing an electrical socket blow out several times over. I pushed the construct away and watched it collapse to the floor. The body juttered and began to burst into black flames, then dissipate into arcane smoke, wisping into the air and disappearing.

That was the downside to using arcane constructs as combat units: they're really easy to take out. Their bones make up the network of magic sustaining their form, and if you break just one, no matter where it is, it'll cause a cascade failure of the entire construct's body due to the flow of magic being disrupted irreversibly. Sometimes they even explode, if they're designed to. Kinda like a final fuck-you to whoever 'killed' them.

"A unicorn who opts to dive into melee combat rather than keeping her distance? How interesting you are, little protege of the sun!"

Oh, right. She was still watching me. It wasn't that I'd forgotten, I just...well, okay, maybe I did forget for a brief instant. I wasn't kidding when I said I was a killer, and the familiar motion of getting behind someone and just hurting them, well, I sometimes get lost in it unexpectedly. These arcane constructs weren't nearly as satisfying to take out as a living, breathing pony, but they'd do for a warm-up.

Two of them came at me from two different angles, and I quickly turned my focus to the one on my left. None of them seemed capable of fighting on their hindlegs like I was, so as it tried to run straight into me, I shifted to the left and threw a straight directly at its face. I heard the satisfying crunch-pop of its snout and its fake teeth getting knocked out of alignment, and it wobbled dazedly past me, legs still trying to run.

It fell flat on its face just as the other one sped up and tackled me from the side, knocking the wind out of me and taking me to the floor. I barely had time to twist myself onto my back and guard my face as the construct rose up and stomped its hooves down, one coming down on my chest and making me wheeze out the small breath I'd managed to take while the other was blocked from crushing my throat.

I quickly grabbed hold of the leg I'd blocked and twisted it to one side, forcing the construct off-balance and pulling that twisted foreleg down to my right. I kicked out with my left hindleg and rolled as the construct fell over to one side, shuffling to straddle it and pin it down. It fought back though, its forehooves sloppily flailing and pushing at me to try and get me off of it. I hammered a forehoof down directly over its face, smashing the back of its head against the floor in response.

The sudden weight on my back forced me forward, mashing my face into the wooden floor. That last construct had tackled me from behind, and was now mounted on my back, forelegs wrapped around my neck and choking me from behind. I pushed myself up onto all fours and tried to shake it off, but it wouldn't let go. The other one slowly got to its hooves as well, shaking off the punch to the face rather quickly. Fortunately, the one whose muzzle I'd broken seemed to dissipate into smoke, just like the first.

Getting on our back is one of our biggest weaknesses. It's one of the key disadvantages ponies have that led to us developing our military with a direct focus on always doing things in pairs at the very least. Once someone's back there, the only way to get them off is to buck them off or use magic, and bucking wasn't exactly the greatest option for me, with a weaker hindleg.

I lit up my horn, and the construct immediately tilted his head and bit down on it like it was some kind of lollipop. Pain lanced through my mind, but I fought through it, even as the other construct came over and bucked me in my chest, trying to bring me to the ground. My hooves faltered, but I quickly backed away from it and focused on my magic instead.

That's the upside to using constructs: they're disposable, and they lack any sense of self-preservation. The simplest and most effective strategy with them is to make them over and over and throw them at your opponent in hopes of overwhelming them with sheer numbers. Judging by how things were going for me right now, it was still tried-and-true.

The magic in my horn charged stronger and stronger, my magic arcing against the inside of the constructs mouth, singing its tongue and teeth before bursting outward in its muzzle and shattering its jaw and skull. Before it could dissipate, I reached up and grabbed hold of one of its forelegs with my hooves, hefting it off of myself and flipping it forward with a firm twist of my body, smacking the flank of the one remaining construct with its deteriorating body.

That didn't stop the construct from landing a kick right on the side of my face though. I reeled backwards from the unexpected impact and held a hoof to my face, the taste of copper coating my palate. By the time my vision straightened out, it was facing me again, charging at me in another kamikaze move. I did say these things were stupid.

It tried to tackle me again, but I was ready for it. I pushed forward when it tried to grab me, grappling with its forelegs and pushing it back, raising up onto my hindlegs again in the process. I lashed out with my forelegs, landing one hook, then another square on its jaw, the construct's head snapping to and fro as I unloaded on it. It fell to the ground, dazed and half-conscious. I sat down in front of it and grabbed its head, and smashed its face into the floor over and over until the crackling noises faded and it dissipated into smoke in my hooves.

Nightmare's laughter reverberated around me, and I got to my hooves, looking around for more danger. Fortunately, nothing else was coming my way. I deliberately opted not to use my magic for fear of giving something away to her, but if she sent even more after me I might not have any choice but to use my horn for more offensive applications.

"You are a vicious pony, Lady Sparkle! You could have broken its leg, but you opted to brutally bash its skull in," I heard her say, a light chuckling accompanying her almost wispy voice. "Not to mention fighting four of them off with minimal use of your horn. Where did you learn to fight like that?"

"A little mix of self-study, training, and a lifetime of learning in the Hard Knock Academy, as a friend of mine likes to put it." I said casually, spitting out some of the blood in my mouth.

"I see...well, in any case, it was very amusing to watch. Sadly, I no longer have the time to spend with you," she said, the smoke in the room coalescing near the door. "My offer still stands."

"My refusal still stands."

"As you wish. You will change your mind."

I watched the billowing starry smoke flow out of the doors and into the night sky, staying where I was for a moment to take in the fact that I'd just survived challenging an alicorn to a fight. Nightmare hadn't attacked me directly, but...still. I pulled my cigar case out of my pocket and held it in a shaky hoof, flicking it open and floating my almost-finished cigar to my lips, lighting it up with my magic and taking a deep drag of it, slowly exhaling the smoke through my nostrils.

I needed to calm my nerves after that.

Author's Note

Huzzah! You all can blame Xenoblade Chronicles 3D for how long this took. That and the overall length of the chapter itself. Seriously, that game's like crack. I can't stop! There's way too much to do. ._.;

Edit: It has come to my attention that I should perhaps post the music I listen to when I write these chapters here as well as on my blog. If you want to know why I post music, my blog post explains it!

Chapter 7 - Eternal Night (Pt. 3)

written by Fire Soul

Okay. Taking stock of the situation. Normally I'd prefer a chalkboard for this sort of thing, or even a whiteboard, but a quick summary would have to do while I waited for the flood of adrenaline to drain out of me.

Celestia's sister was back. That could mean several things, but given that the sun wasn't up and the moon was still high in the sky, I could only assume they were all bad things. Furthermore, if Nightmare Moon was to be believed, she had banished Celestia to the sun. I didn't even have a clue where to start with getting her back.

The ponies of Equestria likely hadn't a clue what was happening either. I could only imagine the pure anarchy breaking out as I sat there nursing my sore side. The tackle one of those constructs had taken me to the floor with had hurt me more than I thought, but at least my ribs didn't feel broken there. I lit my horn up and began to spread my magic over the sore area, gently massaging the muscles and the nerves to help dull it while I thought.

Without sunlight, the crops will die and the planet will get exponentially colder, not to mention the gravitational changes of the sun and moon cycles being disrupted for such a prolonged period of time. Our planet can handle it for a short term as far as our estimates have ever deduced, but we've never desired to test our theories for obvious reasons, so...there was no telling just how bad this could get possibly in just a few days. I can't be the only one who's realized this either, so that's probably adding to the panic....

Then there was the matter of her banishing Celestia. That meant she overpowered my mentor, but how? How strong is she, really? Actually...wait. How strong is she right now, after dealing with Celestia? If she's exhausted she hid it well. She had every opportunity to kill me if she so chose, or even subdue me and...persuade me to serve her. She had no reason not to.

Hmm...too many variables, not enough facts. Prioritize and simplify. I needed to get to the Everfree Castle and secure the Elements of Harmony, which I could only hope I would be able to use against her. I didn't have time to waste. I needed to get my affairs in order and get my guns.

Priority numero uno, however, was making sure Spike was safe and sound. She threatened him, directly and indirectly, and I was going to stomp a mudhole in her face for it even if it was the last thing I ever did, but first I needed to put him to sleep before he figured anything out or got too curious. Oh, who was I kidding, he already figured it out! He was a smart little guy like that.

I gave myself a massage over my side for another minute before moving on to my bad hindleg, the beginnings of trembling beginning to set in now that I was allowing my body to relax. The gentle, warming sensation of my magic working along the muscles and rubbing over my joints made me coo in delight, and I extended my hindleg further until my ankle joint popped. It hurt a little, but from experience I knew I was better off popping it now than later.

With my cigar finished off, stomped out and disposed of, I exited the meeting hall only to run straight into Rainbow Dash, with Applejack running towards us from a distance. I glanced over at Rainbow Dash and quirked a brow at her, but she just gave me a steady, stern glare.

"How'd you know who she was?" she asked me, stepping a bit closer. "Sure were talkin' it up reeeeal nice with her."

Oh, this mare was not even trying to start something with me. I know she wasn't, because ponies are generally smart enough to not start a fight with me based on my reputation alone, and I wanted to believe Rainbow Dash actually had a brain.

"Okay first off, I'm not in the mood right now. Secondly, in case you didn't notice, I didn't exactly get out of there unscathed. Arrogant bitch managed to make me cut the inside of my lip on my teeth. Third," I said, poking at her chest with my hoof. "I didn't see you coming in there to help me, so you don't have any room to judge me even if I were thinking about siding with her. It's called subterfuge. Sorry if you don't 'get it'."

"Don't even! I saw you shmoozin' with her, everypony did! 'Scuse me if I'm a little suspicious, even if you did get your butt kicked."

"Hah, excuse me?" I said, feeling a little indignant about that jab at my fighting prowess. "I've trained with the Royal Guard. I know how to fight. Actually, how would you know how the fight went in there unless you were watching and not doing diddly-squat, hm? Just fluttering outside a window cowering, maybe?"

"Who're you callin' a coward, hornhead?!" she shouted, coming snout-to-snout with me and bearing a rather vicious snarl.

The flaring of her wings garnered an automatic reaction from me, and I got right up in her face in response. I could've backed off, sure, but Twilight Sparkle's no bitch, and she doesn't back down from anyone. Not even an athletic weather manager!

"And now we're at the racial slurs, what else you got in ya, little mare?!" I shouted back at her.

She was really fortunate AJ showed up when she did. I was about two seconds away from burning the fur off her face with a magic missile for that blatant racism.

"Whoa nelly!" I heard Applejack shout as she rushed over towards us. "Y'all two need ta simmer on down there!"

As Applejack tried to get between us, I simply let out a huff and stepped back, shaking it off. Rainbow Dash wasn't worth the trouble at the moment, and as I found out a little while later, she's...not really as bad a pony as some might be able to make her out to be. She just tends to get really heated, and when she gets heated, her brain just sorta turns off. Then she says and does really stupid stuff.

"But she-!" Rainbow tried to say.

Applejack was having none of it. "Ah heard everythin'. Don't gotta repeat it. Just back off, Rainbow," she said, pressing a hoof gently at Rainbow's chest to make her back up. "This ain't no time fer pointin' hooves at anypony."

"Yeah, I don't have time for this either," I quickly interjected, shaking my head. "First things first. Applejack, where's Spike at?"

"What, ya mean that lil' dragon? I ran him on over to Golden Oaks. He said that was where you two were stayin'. Once he stopped cryin', anyways," she said, pulling the rim of her hat further down over her face. "Couldn't calm 'im down, sorry 'bout that. Ain't the best with kids, an' he was scared for his momma somethin' fierce!"

"You didn't leave him there alone, did you?"

"Nah! Mayor showed up shortly after I did. She was lookin' for ya, and I had 'er look after Spike while I headed out to hunt ya down," she said, shrugging a little. "Figured you'd still be here, if you were anywhere in town."

"Alright. Walk with me then, I'll explain what I can," I said, stepping past both of them and heading straight for the library. "You too, Rainbow Dash. I have questions for you too."

I didn't even bother paying Rainbow Dash's indignant snort any mind. I was too focused on Spike and Nightmare Moon.

Given what little I knew at the time, there wasn't much to tell them, aside from Nightmare Moon's amusement at my vague bit of suffering at the hooves of her constructs. That wasn't my reason behind getting them to come with me however.

Applejack was at the center of getting everypony out of the hall along with Rainbow Dash, and they both deserved my respect for that. I had questions about the injured guards we'd both saved, and with Rainbow seeming so flight-centric, I could only hope that she saw which direction Nightmare Moon's creepy smoke cloud had gone. Otherwise, I'd have to go around asking, and that'd take forever.

It was fortunate that Rainbow was feeling a bit more amicable now compared to just a few minutes prior. Guess she had time to cool her head and actually use it for something other than yelling at me and throwing around false accusations. I certainly wasn't complaining.

Fortunately, she'd seen Nightmare Moon slipping away into the Everfree Forest, but beyond that, she could only point in a general direction she saw the smoke floating in. Unfortunately, according to my estimations, she had been heading in the exact direction of the old castle.

Fucking. Fuck!

We arrived at Golden Oaks shortly after that small revelation, one that hadn't failed to impact me in a way that made me rather anxious. My first priority was my son, however. As soon as I was absolutely sure he was safe, I could dedicate my full mental capacity to the tasks ahead of me. Ponies really underestimate how much a single, glaring concern can hamper someone's ability to process information, or even think at their full potential. It's always there, eating away at you, distracting you and clouding your thoughts.

Mayor Mare tried to get my attention as soon as I entered, but I had a singular goal waiting upstairs in our room. I headed right up there, telling her to give me a moment, and slipped away from everyone for a time to get just a moment's peace. I walked over to Spike's little basket and looked him over. I figured he was asleep.

He sat up in his bedding and looked up at me for a moment, eyes glistening with unshed tears. "Y-you okay, Mom...?"

"Aww, honey...of course I'm okay."

"No yer not," he muttered, sniffling a little. "You're standin' funny, and not usin' your bad leg."

Have I ever mentioned just how smart he is? Perceptive too, though he spends all day around me, so perhaps he's had time to figure out my tells. I made a habit of not lying to him whenever possible, but some things I wish he wasn't smart enough to figure out. In all fairness my hindleg wasn't particularly hurting, but it's become a sort of subconscious habit of mine to not stand on it after really stressing it. Seriously, it really hurts when my ankle joint gives out on me, and I don't want to strain it any further than I already do.

"Okay, you're right. I'm not okay. But I will be," I said, moving to lay down next to his basket and nuzzle his cheek with my own. "Remember that time I broke my snout? I was sparring with the Royal Guard, like I usually do?"

He wrapped his small arms around my head and hugged me in response, giving a few weak nods. "Yeah! You sounded funny and hurt a lot."

"Pff-yeah, I did! But I got better, right?"

"Well, yeah..."

I smirked and nudged him with my cheek, making him flop onto his butt in his bedding. "Then I'm totally gonna be fine this time too! Your Mom's tough, remember?"

"Uh-huh! I know." he said, cracking the smallest of smiles as I pushed my snout against his chest and bowled him over onto his back.

Sadly I couldn't tickle him by blowing raspberries against his belly anymore, what with those scales of his, and they'd only get thicker and more solid as he got older. What I could do to him, however....

"GYAAA-hahaheheheheh!!"

The sudden nomming at his belly with my blunt teeth and me snuffling at him had him in hysterics, as it often did. Despite those scales, he could prove to be quite ticklish! My hooves got in on the action by going after his sides, and he flailed at me weakly to try and push me away. Alas, his efforts were in vain!

When I finally stopped, I laid my head over his belly and chest, smiling at him and just relaxing for that moment before sitting up and gently lifting his blankets up and covering him with them.

"Alright, Spike. I've got to take care of some things, but I'd like you to stay here. Take a nap if you want, or read some of the books in the library."

"But I'm not tired!"

I sighed. "I know hun, but I can't take you everywhere with me today," I said, glancing out of one of the windows. "Tonight."

"Aww...." he whined, pouting a little.

"I mean it Spike, you have to stay here in the library. You saw her," I said, frowning at the memory of the mocking alicorn. "You're safer indoors."

He certainly didn't like it, but he at least agreed with me enough to stay put. He wasn't sleepy though, so I brought him downstairs, where a lot more ponies had gathered, much to my surprise. Applejack and Rainbow Dash were still there, and now Pinkie, Rarity, and even Fluttershy had shown up. Numerous other townsfolk I didn't know were flooding the lobby as well, and Mayor Mare was starting to look overwhelmed as she tried to organize all of them.

Welp. That was definitely my sort of thing, so I quickly went downstairs with Spike in tow and began to calm everyone down, giving the large mob some orders while the five mares I'd actually gotten a bit more accustomed to stayed off to the side. I'm not sure why, but they were lingering.

I sent Applejack to check in with the town's farmers and merchants, while Rainbow Dash volunteered to check in with the town's weather pegasi to make sure they all knew what was going on. Fluttershy had apparently already checked on her animals and, aside from all of them being thrown off by it still being dark out, they were all behaving well enough. Pinkie Pie was there because 'everyone else was', and Rarity was checking in because she simply wanted to help with whatever she could.

Lacking any other significant ideas for what Pinkie and Rarity could be doing, I asked them both to go and help organize the other citizens going door-to-door, reassuring the populace as to what was happening and what was being done about the abnormal lack of sun overhead. Fluttershy offered to keep an eye on Spike, after I explained what I'd be up to.

If Mayor Mare had any issues with me taking charge like that, she certainly didn't say anything. I'm sure this wasn't something she was prepared to deal with, and I know how being at the center of that can be really overwhelming.

I quickly learned from her that my two guards were at the hospital, and I rushed over to check in on them. The hospital itself wasn't that far away, but with everyone running around asking questions in the dead of 'night', well...I got stopped a lot. Funny how during a crisis everyone suddenly knows who the Princess's protege is. Then again, most of them might just know me from taking charge in the library. Not like I answered a lot of their questions, I just kinda gave a general synopsis and sent them all out to spread the word.

I had two reasons to check in on them. For one, I needed a weapon I could fall back on if I ran out of bullets. They had hoofblades I could make good use of, and the weaponry and armor of the Royal Guard was infinitely superior to anything the police had in their repertoire...well, when it came to classic weaponry anyways. Secondly, I needed to gather more information before I could put together any kind of solid theory about Nightmare Moon's strength at this point in time.

With the way they were spasming before Applejack picked them up and got them out of there, I also had suspicions as to the nature of that lightning she cast on them.

They held no qualms with letting me in to see them. Despite being temporarily knocked out, they were both conscious and stable. However, that spasming I'd seen earlier hadn't abated, and seemed to be causing them no small amount of pain and discomfort.

A simple quick analysis of their bodies told me everything I needed to know. Hunter's Bolt, a fairly easy-to-cast alternative form of the far more powerful Lightning spell. Specifically designed as a way for unicorns to help hunt animals and criminals down with non-lethal force, it shocks the body with a low-power bolt of electricity, but the magic inherent in the spell lingers in the muscles of the victim. It can be overcome given enough time, but judging by how they were still having trouble controlling their limbs and how they were randomly convulsing, she had to have put plenty of power into it to make sure they stayed out of her way.

I took the time to remove the remnants of the spell from their aching bodies, since the doctors didn't seem to fully understand what they were dealing with. Not surprising, the spell's so old that most ponies don't even remember it exists, outside of the rare Equestrian big-game hunters.

They both visibly relaxed and let their muscles loosen now that they could finally afford to do so. They hadn't even been able to drink water or eat food while under the spell's effects, and I can confirm with one-hundred percent accuracy that they went right for their water cups at their bedsides once they were sure they weren't going to send water flying everywhere.

Once they'd both calmed down and had settled in, I turned to one of them and firmly crossed my right foreleg over my chest, my posture snapping to attention and my head held high. The Royal Guard was heavy on tradition, and what I had in mind was no exception.

A guard's weapon is sacred, made for him, crafted to be wielded by him. The same goes for their armor. To allow another to wield your weapon...some would call it one of the greatest insults, to oneself and to the Royal Guard as a whole. Without proper procedures being shown, a Royal Guard could risk being discharged on the spot for such blatant disrespect to his fellow guardsponies.

"Do you entrust your weapon to me, to be wielded with honor in the service of Equestria and Princess Celestia?" I asked him, never once breaking eye contact. I could not waver in my show of conviction.

He stared at me for a tense moment, judging me, examining me...then slowly eased himself out of his bed. The attending nurses tried to help him, but he wouldn't have any of it. It was impossible to recognize him, in or out of his armor, thanks to the enchantments placed upon them. Regardless, I'd been training with them, sparring with them and exercising with them every week of my life since I became Celestia's student. I was sure he at least recognized me, not because of my status, but because of my familiarity among the guards in the castle.

He looked me over for a moment, then glanced over to his partner, who was now sitting up more in his bed to get a better view of what was going on. The standing guard nodded to him, his wings fluttering and tucking in against his sides.

"Do you bear witness to this?" he asked.

"I do." the other pegasus said.

He turned back to me and, as ceremony would dictate, he stood at attention and composed himself before me.

"My name is Freewind, and I recognize this pony as being worthy of bearing our burden," he stated with intense conviction, glancing over to his hoofblade placed among the other parts of his armor. "My blade is yours until we meet again, Conscript."

I bowed before him and picked up his hoofblade with my magic, floating it over to myself and holding out the foreleg I'd crossed over my chest. I slid the hoofblade sheath over my foreleg, the armored front of it meant to act as a small shield as well as a sheath for the blade hidden inside of it. It wasn't a unicorn hoofblade, but it would do. I tightened and adjusted the straps until it was fit snugly on my leg before setting my hoof down, meeting his stern gaze once more.

He gave me a snappy salute. "Ambulare cum Solis fortitudo."

Walk with the Sun's might. An appropriate saying for the Royal Guard if ever there was one. I did not hesitate to salute him in turn. It was unnecessary if you asked me, but tradition was tradition, and it ran strong in the veins of every Royal Guard, as sure as their blood.

The nurses quickly urged him back into his bed once his legs began to shake from the sheer exhaustion his muscles were feeling, and I took the chance to leave and head out to prepare for dealing with Nightmare Moon. While my theories weren't fully proven, I had enough information to craft a decent hypothesis.

Nightmare Moon was weakened in the process of banishing Celestia.

If she had the kind of power that alicorns have, then what purpose would she have for me? More than that, why didn't she get rid of the guards to send a message? I was powerful, but I could never match the raw might I've read about in books regarding Celestia. Plus, if she was telling the truth, she overpowered Celestia. How powerful must she be?

With a hoofblade secured, I began my trek straight back to the library, stopping ponies as I went. I was going to be heading for the Everfree regardless, but I wanted to be absolutely sure Rainbow was on the money about what she'd seen. Turns out she was.

When I reached the library, Fluttershy was sitting with Spike, reading him a Daring Do book. For how shy she seemed to be, she didn't have any problem keeping him interested. I certainly had no complaints. I simply gave them both a brief greeting and headed straight up to my room, pulling our suitcase out and opening it up.

I took my two pistols out and examined them closely, rapidly going through the procedure of checking the chambers and the barrel for any obstructions or dust before taking the boxes of bullets out. A small cloth pouch I'd brought along for them was quickly filled as I emptied the boxes into it, and I tied it securely around my waist. Ponies sometimes questioned my choice in firearm since there were more advanced guns available, but those modern pistols had a tendency to jam. I stick with revolving chambers because they don't, and the ability to levitate and float things around makes it easy to rapidly reload them.

I had one other gun hidden away, deep under everything else in the suitcase, but it was only meant as a precaution. I didn't think I'd actually have to make use of it, but with Nightmare Moon's appearance...yeah. I should probably bring that along too.

I carefully reached in and cradled a much bigger, higher-caliber revolver from beneath my underwear, along with a single small box of bullets and an even smaller pouch than the one I already had at my side. I poured the revolver bullets into the pouch and tied it to the other one, keeping six of them out to load them into the revolver.

This thing was my game-changer, under normal circumstances. Pistols not doing the trick? Here, try to deal with this monstrosity! Somethin' downright sexy about holding this beast in my hooves...mmm. A photographer could've made money off the poses I struck when I first bought it.

That was when I heard a commotion downstairs. With my more keen sense of hearing, I could hear multiple voices, all of them familiar to me. Why were they all back here? They had jobs to do!

I quickly pulled out my three-holster pleather straps and slipped them around myself, the two holsters for my pistols resting just under my chest, semi-hidden right next to the insides of my forelegs. The holster for my revolver sat at my left side, right next to the pouches my bullets were in.

Heading downstairs, I was greeted with the sight of all of them conversing, with Pinkie absent from the gathered group. I looked them all over in confusion, before walking down the stairs and looking over to Spike.

"Why do you have your guns, Mom?"

Oh, I didn't want to answer that. I really didn't. Still, he was my son, and he deserved an explanation why mommy might not be coming back. I had no illusions about this. If I was wrong, or if Nightmare decided I was no longer entertaining, there was a very real chance I'd be dead by the end of the day. Night. You know what I mean.

"I'm being careful, Spike. You saw her."

"Yeah," he muttered, curling up a little closer to Fluttershy. "She was really scary."

"Mmmhmm. She could also hurt lots of ponies," I said, walking over to him and gently stroking my hoof over his small spines. "So I need to track her down before she gets the chance. Plus, I need to get Celestia back."

I'm sure he wanted to argue about it, no doubt out of his concern for me. Nightmare Moon wasn't the sort of pony you wanted to get angry, especially from a child's perspective. She was the mare of darkness that would gobble you up on Nightmare Night if you didn't appease her with sweet treats!

Heh. I just remembered the time I scared him witless by accident by casting an illusion over myself to resemble how she looked in his little book. I had intended to just confiscate some of his candy, but he screamed loud enough for our neighbors to hear him. Then I spent an hour consoling him, ending in us going out to get ice cream. I still believe he played me like a fiddle after he realized it wasn't actually Nightmare Moon coming to gobble his backside or something...and he was only three!

He relented when he realized just how serious I was. He had no understanding of exactly what I was capable of, but I was his Mother. He knew 'The Look' that all Mothers have. Even my own Mom has it, and despite her betrayal of me in my childhood, I still flinch on the rare occasion she actually has a reason to look at me like that. I swear, it's like feeling a laser burning a hole into you.

The other ponies in the room, however, did not seem affected by my motherly ways.

"Whoa whoa whoa! Alone? As in, you're gonna find and stop the great mighty alicorn that's been sealed in the moon for a thousand years by yourself kind of alone?"

Oh, Rainbow Dash. Ever the skeptic, that one. Not that I blamed her. I mean if I felt like I had the time to wait for assistance from Canterlot, I probably would've. How unfortunate that I was working off the assumption that she was weakened from her confrontation with Celestia. Who knew how quickly she could recover?

"Yes, that's exactly what I'm planning." I said slowly, eyeing all of them as they began to gather around me. "Where's Mayor Mare?"

"Oh, she went back to City Hall," Fluttershy chimed in, slowly standing up and hoofing over the book she had been reading to Spike, so he could keep reading on his own. "She said she had a lot of work to do after what happened."

"I'd imagine. Alright then," I said, looking around at them. "With that out of the way...why are you all here? I thought you were all taking care of things?"

"Oh, that stuff? Well, we were gonna get to work, but..." I heard AJ say.

A loud cannon blast from outside quickly interrupted us, and I reflexively reached for one of my pistols with a hoof and pointed it at the front door, then one of the windows next to it.

"What the F-!" I began to say, before the fact that Spike was nearby froze the word in my throat. "Fffffmmmph-What was that?!"

Rainbow's sudden peal of laughter made me falter for a moment. Rarity and Fluttershy didn't think it was all that funny, both of them backing away at the sight of the gun in my hoof. I didn't fault them for being afraid of it. Guns were dangerous, and with how pure and nice their lives have been out here, they probably never saw one before now.

Applejack came up next to me, pushing my hoof down towards the ground. "Hey now, cool yer horn unicorn! You're more jumpy than Winona in a thunderstorm. I was about ta say, we're here 'cuz Pinkie Pie's got it covered."

I slowly holstered my pistol and stared at all of them in confusion. "How could she possibly be doing everything you all had to do?"

"Sugarcube, when you live in Ponyville, you learn two very important things 'bout Pinkie Pie. First is, she makes a point of makin' sure she knows everypony, and I mean everypony, that ever comes inta town. Second thing is," she said, grinning a little. "Don't ever question the crazy stuff she gets up to. Yer head'll hurt a lot less if ya don't."

It wasn't more than a few moments after that that I heard someone shouting over a megaphone about a 'partysplosion', followed by another cannon blast. I was utterly confused about the cannon still, and I'm pretty sure Applejack noticed.

"Party cannon. Shoots confetti and streamers."

"Party...cannon?"

"Mmmhmm."

"As in, a weapon. That shoots bits of paper."

"And whole parties, if she gets her calculations right."

"You mean party supplies, or...wait. Calculations? That mare does calculations for this stuff? How could she calculate-?"

Applejack sighed in exasperation. "What'd I just tell ya? Don't question it."

"B-but-!" I tried to say, utterly flabbergasted by the very concept of it.

"Darling, perhaps I am more aware of your advanced education than the other ponies in this room," Rarity began to say from off to the side. "So I have to say that this is one problem you will not be able to solve. You really should just let it go."

"Beeeesides, who cares how Pinkie does what she does as long as it isn't hurting anypony?" I heard Rainbow Dash say from up above. She was flying upside-down, as if she were reclining on thin air. "Everypony in Ponyville knows a Pinkie Pie party's the place to be! As soon as everyone hears about it, that's where they'll be, and then the news'll spread to everyone, and that'll be that."

I think I needed another cigar. Shame Spike was around.

Whatever. As long as the work was getting done, I didn't really care how in this case. I didn't get a respite, unfortunately. They were all strangely concerned about me having those guns on my body, and the hoofblade I had on my right foreleg. More than that though, they seemed very worried about me going into that forest.

I heard the usual spiel about the place. The old superstitions, all of which I shrugged off. There were superstitions and there were facts, and I already knew all of the facts. My magic and my weapons would see me through. If either of those guards had been close to my size I probably would've borrowed their armor as well, but alas, all I had was my suit.

"Alright, well...if all that's taken care of, what are all of you doing here instead of going home, or...I dunno, going to Pinkie's party?" I asked.

"Well, I dunno about anyone else, but I came back because Pinkie told me to. Pretty insistent about it too." Rainbow Dash responded, dropping down to the floor once more and taking a seat at the library's reading table.

Rarity and Applejack both nodded in agreement, uttering confirmations that they had also gotten the same instructions from Pinkie Pie. I assumed that they all must've been friends with her in some way, but looking back, it was more likely that they were willing to listen because things were a little tense and confusing at the time.

"I wonder why she would do that?" Fluttershy uttered from off to the side.

"Because Twilypants is gonna do something silly and irresponsible!"

I looked up to the upstairs bedroom door, and there was Pinkie Pie. Just standing there like it's no big thang. I pointed up at her for a moment, then turned to Applejack, my mouth hanging open, lacking the ability to speak on the subject. Applejack just slowly shook her head.

"Don't bother."

If I had something close by to bang my head against, I would've done it.

Rainbow shrugged a little. "I'd say what she's planning is more stupid and idiotic than silly and irresponsible."

"Duh! She was gonna go into the Everfree Forest all on her own!" Pinkie half-shouted, darting down to join the small crowd that we made up. "No way we can let her go in there by herself!"

"Well! I do believe that is a sentiment I can agree with." I heard Rarity say.

"Eeyup!"

"Darn right!"

"I-it would be really bad...if we just let you go by yourself."

Oh, Tartarus no!

"Excuse me? You're all civilians. A farmer, a weather manager, an animal shelter employee, a baker and a fashionista," I said calmly, shaking my head. "Why would any of you be so willing to go into that forest with me?"

"Pff, we can't let our new friend go alone!" Pinkie said with the kind of enthusiasm I'd only come to expect from a child. "If we did, then we would be the irresponsible ones!"

Aaand they all agreed with her. Grand.

"I think it's a bit early to be calling me a friend. All of you barely know me." I said slowly, hoping against all hope that they would back down. They didn't.

"Pff, that doesn't matter! You were a pretty cool gal when I ran into you." Rainbow said, waving it off.

"Ya took time ta have a meal with me an' my family. Yer alright in my book!"

"We still have plans for tea! I would be remiss to let you throw your life away in a scary forest."

Fluttershy fidgeted a little and scuffed her hoof against the floor. "You were...nice. It was nice having you over to my cottage."

"And I still need to make it up to you for scaring you and your kid last night!"

"Alright. Time to take off the kid gloves," I said, stamping a hoof firmly against the floor. "None of you are coming with me."

I began to pace back and forth, shaking my head. "You are all untrained, inexperienced, and above all else, you. Are all. Civilians. It's my duty, among many other duties, to make sure ponies like you stay out of harm's way. You would all just be in the way."

I hated being so blunt with them, since they were just being nice, but their genuine concern was unfounded...or so I thought at the time. I suppose I was only lucky that my bluntness didn't deter them. Thanks to Spike.

"M-Mom, would you really die in there?" he asked from off to the side.

"No honey, of course not," I said, smirking. "You know what I can do."

"But what about when you find Nightmare Moon?"

I didn't know what to say to that. I've never been the type to boast and bluster about myself, especially if I'm going to try to say something that is either a complete lie, or it's something I can't be entirely sure about. This, more than anything else, was something I just couldn't contradict him about. What was I supposed to do? Promise him I'd come back? What then, if I didn't?

"I don't know, Spike. But when I do find her, I'll do everything I can to stop her."

"Yeah, but...but she was stronger n' Celestia," he mumbled, twiddling his clawtips together. "What if she hurts you really bad?"

"Spike..." I muttered, taking a deep breath to steady myself. "This is something I have to do-"

"But you don't gotta do it alone!" he said, pointing to the other mares in the room. "They can help!"

"Spike, I can't..."

"Why not?!"

"Because it's dangerous!"

"All the more reason why you should be letting us come along, wouldn't you agree?" Rarity suddenly chimed in, stepping between both of us. "Surely us escorting you through that dreadful forest would put your son's mind at ease, hmm~?"

Oh, you clever bitch. She managed to save me from explaining to Spike why I needed to do this even if I might die, and at the same time used my son's concern against me to persuade me to let them come along. I didn't know whether to punch her or just slap her. Not that there's much of a difference when it comes to us ponies. Hard hooves and whatnot.

"...Yes," I said, forcing a small smile. "You know what? You're right. An escort is a good idea. So good in fact, I think we're all ready to go right this moment!"

I looked to Spike again and picked him up in my magic, pulling him closer to me. "But first...I need a promise from my little drake that he'll behave himself and stay right here in this library. He can be a good drake, right?"

He knew that tone in my voice. That was the 'don't fuck this up or I'll tan your hide' tone. All Mothers knew it, in some way, shape or form. Little children know not to defy their Mothers when that tone came into play. It was kind of like when you use someone's middle name: they know they fucked up. They just didn't know how much. Yet.

Once I secured a fairly solid promise from him, I set him down and gave him a nuzzle before heading out of the library, with the five mares in tow. This didn't sit well with me, and I certainly didn't need to bring them along just because Spike insisted, but...at the same time, I didn't feel like arguing with them about it again. That was just a waste of time.

I said nothing to them until we reached the edge of the forest, aside from a brief confirmation that Rainbow would be taking us right to where Nightmare Moon entered the forest at. I'm fairly sure they could tell that I was fuming over the current situation, and really I was. They were being annoyingly persistent and suicidal and I hated not being able to dissuade them. Only so much you can do against such stubbornness...aside from maybe using some sleeping spells on them, but that would be abuse of my magic, aaand that's illegal.

Maybe it's strange that I'd be concerned with doing illegal things. Usually I'm not. However, most crimes I commit I endeavor not to leave witnesses or trails they can track me down with. This isn't exactly an extreme crime, but it's still a pretty major one. You don't abuse magic, especially in my position.

I stepped forward and turned to face them all, looking them over for a moment before sighing. "Nothing I can do to talk any of you out of it, huh?"

A chorus of confirmations greeted me, and I just gritted my teeth. Fucking stupid ponies...!

"Fine. If anyone asks, you all followed me into the forest because you were worried about me. Got it?"

"U-uhm...yes." I heard Fluttershy mumble.

"Why? What's the big deal?" Rainbow Dash said from up above, coming down to land alongside the others.

"Because I borrowed this hoofblade from a Royal Guard. If any of you die on my watch, it'd be a stain on his honor as much as it'd be a stain on mine," I explained as simply as I could, re-checking the straps on my hoofblade to make sure they were secure still. "Not to mention the fact that I myself would have failed to protect you! I'm sure you've all got families that care about you, so why are all of you so insistent on coming with me?!"

"'Cuz yer bein' a dang fool fer one," Applejack suddenly chimed in. "What right do you have ta tell us what we can and can't do?"

"I'm Celestia's protege for one."

"Aside from that!" She pointed back towards Ponyville with a hoof, staring straight into my gaze. "Yer leavin' yer kin behind 'cuz ya feel like if ya don't do this, he's gonna suffer a whole lot more, right? Well...family means a lot to us Apples too. Ah'm sure ya get what I mean by that."

I did, after a moment of consideration. I suppose she'd given it as much thought as I did, the moment I got the chance to really sit down and let my brain process what was happening. No sunlight, no crops, no food. No income for her or the entirety of her family worldwide. That'd motivate any farmer into action as long as they had the gumption to step outside what they're used to in hopes of making a difference.

"Plus!" I heard Pinkie shout from behind me, just before a pony-sized weight flopped onto my back, almost making my legs buckle under me. "You've got a really bad attitude. We'll be just fine! You're super-strong, right?"

"Please get off my back," I hissed through gritted teeth, every muscle in my body coiled like a spring. "I almost threw you head-first onto the ground like a sack of potatoes."

She did as I asked, hopping off of me in an instant. "The strongest! Rainbow Dash is the fastest flyer in Equestria too."

The blue pegasus puffed her wings a little, practically basking in the praise as if the sun itself were shining down upon her. I resisted the urge to roll my eyes.

"Fine," I said, shaking my head slowly. "I don't have time to argue with any of you-" moronic, mentally handicapped "-ponies. Come on."

The moment I turned to step into the forest, they all cheered (save for Fluttershy) and trotted ahead of me. I swear to Celestia, if the view back there wasn't so nice, I would've been way more pissed off than I actually was. As it stood, I was just vaguely heated...and nursing a minor ache in my hindleg from when Pinkie hopped on my back. Seriously, that mare has no sense of personal space!

Not that I was complaining or anything. She was cute...in her own way. Sorta chubby in all the right places, that attractive kind of pudge that makes you just wanna wrap your legs around her and give her a big hug, maybe snuggle into her a little. Seriously, chubby mares? So warm....

Soon the dense canopy of the forest enveloped us, and our eyes had to adjust to the overwhelming darkness the forest had been covered in. It wouldn't have been such a problem if the sun were out, but as it stood, the somewhat bright moonlight only illuminated certain parts of the forest, leaving us walking in absolute darkness in a lot of places along the established path, overgrown as it was. If it weren't for Rarity and I being able to light our horns up, the forest would've actually been difficult just to walk through.

The layout of the Everfree Forest is deceptive at first glance. The place itself is teeming with magic, and that makes some ponies believe that the forest restructures itself just to confuse ponies that slowly become more and more lost until the forest consumes them entirely, never to be heard from again. That's not how magic works obviously. The reality is, this place is confusing because it looks so flat when you look at it from overhead, but it really isn't.

Case in point: where we were shortly after entering the forest. It was only about twenty minutes in, but we were curving around a fairly tall hill leading down along the side of a cliff. Judging by how it looked over the edge, this cliffside had gone through a lot of erosion over the years from rainfall. Plus, with the lack of a canopy on one side of us, we had plenty of light to be able to see for the time being.

"...Nobody knows~!" I heard Rainbow Dash say, once I started paying attention to them again. "But they say that ponies that go into this forest...never. Come. Out!"

Seriously, why are they talking like this whole situation is no big deal at all? It was actually getting on my nerves. Then I heard the sound of solid stone and dirt cracking, and I felt the ground under us shift just a little bit.

"Oh, shi-!"

The last thing I saw was a wisp of star-filled darkness floating from the broken cliff face, before I landed side-first on the slanted ground beneath me. I tumbled and rolled faster and faster, and a dazed attempt to halt my momentum led to my bad hindleg giving out and causing me to go head-over-hooves a few times, clonking my head against the ground and screwing up what little sense I had of up from down.

I banged my head several times on the way down, stars and lights flashing before my eyes with every impact while my ears began to ring and completely blank out the sound from my surroundings. It wasn't until I landed flat on my front and began to slide further down the hill. I blindly pawed at the ground with my hooves in hopes of catching on something, but there was nothing but dirt crumbling under me.

Suddenly there was nothing beneath my backside, and I reflexively clung to the ground as my body weight lurched back and down, trying to pull me the rest of the way off. I could feel myself slipping, but with the world spinning before my eyes and my brain utterly muddled by how rattled around it'd gotten, I couldn't even use my magic to teleport back up onto the cliff. I didn't even know exactly where the cliff was!

Before I could fall all the way over, I saw a blurry image of an orange pony in front of me, and powerful hooves snapped down over my own, holding me up while her hindlegs dug into the dirt more.

"Twilight! C'mon, snap out of it, ya gotta...!" I heard someone say, dull and muffled to the point of almost being impossible to hear. "Okay, I just gotta find a way ta..."

The world was still spinning, but judging from how she was staring away from me and what happened next, I think she was looking up at the sky. Just trying to turn my head made me feel nauseous, and I could hear myself groan in cranial agony and confusion.

"Okay sugarcube, ya gotta listen to me here," she said, tightening her grip a little when I slipped just a little bit. "Ya gotta trust me, and let go."

"You fuggin'-" I slurred back at her, gurgling a little as the world began to spin even faster the moment I tried to lift my head. "-serious?"

"You'll be just fine. You just gotta let go," she said, cracking what I believe was a smile. "It's the honest truth. Ya trust me?"

"Nnnoh, not really...!" I hissed out, closing my eyes to alleviate how much my equilibrium was thrown off.

"Gee, thanks," she muttered, her tone flat and unamused. "But you gotta trust me now!"

"No, just lemme..." I mumbled, trying to pull myself up again.

"Whoa!" she suddenly cried out. "Knock it off! You keep that up and we're both goin' over!"

She was right. I could hear the dirt and rock beneath us both giving way just a little bit, the cliffside crumbling under my hindhooves more with every attempt I made to dig them in and push myself back up.

"Listen to me Twilight," I heard Applejack mutter, the seriousness of her tone drawing what little focus I had straight to her. "You fall right now, and you'll be safe. But if you don't let go, we're both goin' down together, an' we'll either be really badly hurt or dead. Trust me, an' you'll be safe."

I'll be the first to admit that I have some serious trust issues, especially when it comes to strangers. Is it really that surprising though? Trust is what gets you blindsided in the kind of unique illegal industry I wound up being a part of, among many others. Trust led to one of my partners taking a bullet to the back of the head while I fought my way out of a shady warehouse with nothing but a pistol and six spare bullets.

Yet, in this moment, just from the tone of her voice...I felt like I could trust her. I clenched my eyes shut and let go of her, and she let me go in turn.

I felt the brief weightlessness of freefall for only a few seconds before two sets of forelegs caught me mid-air, cradling my semi-limp body in their grip. I could barely make out the familiar luxuriously long pink mane of one of them, and the rainbow-colored mane of the other. Huh. Applejack wasn't kidding. She could've said they'd catch me though. Kinda dumb that she didn't.

I soon found myself sitting on solid ground once more, and I immediately began to sway to one side. The others were already down there, and while Rainbow went up to see if Applejack needed some assistance, Fluttershy braced me and began to touch over my forehead and look closely into my eyes. I vaguely heard her ask Rarity to come over and give her some more light, and some distant part of my sensible mind acknowledged that she sounded surprisingly authoritative in that moment.

She checked my eyes and examined my head. I think it was raw luck that I didn't have some solid stone embedded in my skull, or any fractures to speak of. I almost didn't hear her tell me to lay down and close my eyes for a while. It certainly helped. I didn't recall anything about her being a trained nurse....

"Twilight," I heard Applejack say from behind me, her hooves clopping lightly against the dirt as she stepped closer to me. "Us Apples, we pride ourselves on our family and our honesty. You'd best remember that next time you decide ta question whether or not I'm tellin' ya the honest truth."

I just held my head and nodded once. "Duly noted."

It wasn't all that clear how much time had actually passed, but we all stayed in one location for a time until we heard a loud roar from a manticore that was...alarmingly close to where we were at. It quickly shut Rainbow's bragging right up, and despite my woozy condition and Fluttershy checking in on me every few minutes to see how well I could see things, we picked ourselves up and continued moving forward.

She protested when I pulled out my bottle of painkillers and a water bottle I'd procured from the library's kitchen, since there's no telling yet whether or not I had a concussion and medicine like that could potentially do something bad to me, but since I wasn't hearing colors or seeing smells or becoming extremely photosensitive or anything like that, I was decently sure I'd be alright. Besides, my ankle joint was throbbing and so was my head. Some relief was more than welcome.

Then we ran into the manticore. Everything was still flip-floppy in my eyes and I was still having trouble standing up straight, and suddenly there was this huge hulking lion-like beast with a scorpion's tail standing in our way, irate and very unhappy to see any of us.

I tried to tell them all to back down, and Fluttershy at least stayed out of it, but even Rarity had thrown herself into the fray, boldly rushing up and bucking it right in the face. Did they not know what those jaws could do, what that poison in the manticore's stinger could do to them?! That stuff was a paralytic toxin that could shut your lungs and even your heart down in mere minutes!

My magic just wouldn't come to me. All I could do was charge my horn in a threatening display, even as Rainbow began to fly around it and AJ was thrown off of the beast's back. What was Pinkie doing during all of this? No fucking clue, I couldn't see straight!

I also couldn't stand up straight it seemed, because Fluttershy suddenly wasn't there next to me. She'd been trying to grab their attention the entire time things began to unfold with the manticore, but they weren't listening to her. To be fair, she wasn't calling out to them very loudly either, so it's not shocking that they didn't really hear her. At least I knew that my hearing was returning to normal, instead of the fuzzy almost-nothing that it was mere minutes prior.

I could scarcely make out the scene before me, with Rainbow whizzing around the manticore as if it were a mere plaything...but then, she was intercepted by that tail. My heart dropped into the pit of my stomach as the worst possible scenario played itself out in front of me, and the rush of adrenaline was doing wonders to help me focus. I took a tentative step forward and got no further before Fluttershy got between us and the manticore itself.

Then she turned and calmly walked towards it. I wanted to stop her, but I could barely keep myself stable on my hooves, much less charge forward to save the crazy mare. However, she didn't really need saving. In my jumbled head, the fact that she can talk to animals just sorta slipped my mind.

So when I watched her nuzzle the manticore's paw, and it willingly lifted it for her, I was rather surprised. So was everypony else. We watched her yank out what looked like a very large timberwolf tooth from the manticore's paw, and in response it embraced her and began...was that seriously purring? I think I heard purring!

We all walked past, with Rainbow helping me along, but I paused to wait for Fluttershy. Once she was done with the manticore, she walked up next to me and acted as my brace, though I wasn't so bad after what just happened.

I looked over at her and tilted my head a little. "How'd you know that would work?"

"Because I could tell she was in pain," she responded, flashing a bright smile. "Sometimes all it takes is a little kindness, Twilight."

It was a sweet thought, truth be told. The idea that being kind was all that ponies really needed to get along in life. It even made me crack a little smile. If only life had been that simple for me while I was growing up.

We trekked along in amicable silence from that point on, though for how long I wasn't entirely sure. Thus far, my status as their protector on this voyage was in question as far as I was concerned, and my pride had taken a significant hit. Not twenty minutes in and I get a head injury? I was starting to feel better now, the world wasn't spinning like a top anymore, and I could at least use my magic but still.

I hadn't seen Nightmare's presence with the manticore, but it wouldn't have surprised me. It almost seemed too perfect in terms of timing. We're sent over a cliff first, and I know I saw her wispy starry smoke-stuff there just before the ground gave way, and then like ten minutes later we run across a manticore while I'm incapacitated.

What we stumbled across next however? That didn't concern me so much compared to how it was resolved, and it was certainly by no action of my own, once again.

Chapter 8 - Eternal Night (Pt. 4)

written by Fire Soul

It began simply enough. Rarity was making a fuss about our rather drab surroundings until the moonlight began to fade around us entirely. I found that strange since the overhead canopy wasn't all that dense, but I didn't have time to question it before everything began to spiral out of control.

Fluttershy was the first to scream. Just as quickly as the darkness had come, it was rapidly faded out right in time for us to see that we were surrounded by spooky, scary trees. They all began to scream around me as the trees seemed to lean in towards us, their branches looking like wooden claws, reaching down to snatch all of us up.

I felt the tingle of very illegal magic worming its way into my head, and I felt an unnatural sensation of fear where there should be none. Under normal circumstances, something this childish would never scare me, but I felt horrified. Well, I did for a moment anyways. I quickly banished what I recognized as mind magic from my consciousness, and reinforced my mental defenses against it. The moment I did that, the changes to my perception disappeared; they were nothing but ordinary trees.

Clearly this didn't extend to my companions. They began to panic the more the mind magic ate away at them...except for Pinkie. She actually walked up to one of the trees and started making silly faces at it. Clearly she was seeing what they were seeing, but it wasn't having the appropriate effect on her. I wanted to question why, but things quickly got more alarmingly confusing for me, because what Pinkie did shouldn't have been physically possible.

The others told her to run, and I stood there, staring in disbelief as she began to sing.

"She can't seriously be...?" I muttered.

"She is." I heard Rarity comment while Pinkie darted around us.

I didn't feel it right away, as the song went on. There was a welling giddiness in me as Pinkie continued to talk about her Granny Pie and how her Grandma taught her to deal with her fear, but when I found myself actually laughing a little and noticing the scary faces on the trees again, I knew what I was dealing with.

She was using mind magic. Without a horn.

The implications of this clear fact didn't hit me until much later, but at the time it was simply jarring. It had been so insidious, how it had weaseled its way past my defenses without me even noticing until it actually began to have an effect on me. I didn't block it immediately. I had to be absolutely sure that was exactly what I was feeling. It felt a little off, different from the kind of mind magic I've felt before, but it was definitely exactly what I thought it was.

The moment I pushed it away, Pinkie seemed to twinge mid-song and look right at me. I met her gaze, surprised that she noticed. We stared at each other while she continued to sing, not missing a beat. I think she knew...and despite her song, I saw a kind of fleeting fear in her gaze.

The infectious joy welled up in all of them around me, and soon they were all 'giggling at the ghosties'. I watched the scary faces on the trees disappear as they laughed their worries away, and soon, the clearing was cleansed of that ambient influence we all felt in the first place. I didn't care much about that though. I was too busy coming to terms with the fact that Pinkie's influence on everyone's minds allowed her to essentially get rid of that influence with her good feelings.

It was so basic, so simple...but so remarkably effective.

Once they'd all gotten it out of their systems we continued on, but Pinkie seemed a bit unnerved. She kept looking back at me while we walked along, and it was clear to me that she needed some answers. I needed some too.

"Hey, girls? I want to ask Pinkie something, you mind giving us a little space?" I said to them, motioning behind us. "It's just about what happened back there."

Pinkie's head snapped around to look at me full-on. "Huh?"

I gave her a small nod and a smile. "It's no big deal, I just have some questions is all!"

The others gave us funny looks, but ultimately they didn't think much of it. Or at least, I think they didn't. Rainbow seemed suspicious, and Fluttershy still looked back at me like she was afraid I might keel over at any moment, but it wasn't my concern at the time. My attention was focused on Pinkie.

She presented an image of oblivious delight as she always did, but there was something to her smile, something strained. We walked side-by-side in relative silence for a few moments, before I finally broke the silence.

"So. What was that back there?"

"What was what, Twily?" she asked, her strange habit of hopping and pronking around making it hard to maintain eye contact with her.

"First of all, don't call me Twily," I said firmly, shaking my head. "Only my brother's allowed to call me that. Secondly," I said, leaning in towards her and lowering my voice. "You know what I'm talking about."

Her face ran a gamut of emotions, and I knew them all too well. I've dealt with ponies that couldn't manage a good poker-face if their lives depended on it before, and she was no different. There was that initial moment of defensiveness, that fake response to continue to play naive, then the anger...and then the fear. I think her mane actually deflated a little.

I peeked up at the others to see if they noticed the sudden change in Pinkie's demeanor. They did not. They were chatting about something that I wasn't paying any mind to.

"How...did you do that?" I asked her, clenching my teeth a little. "You're not a unicorn."

"I-I don't know! I really don't!" she whispered, leaning away from me. "Please, just let it go!"

"An earth pony uses magic and you expect me to just leave it alone?!" I hissed at her, shaking my head. "No way."

"Well...w-well how did you block it out?!" she asked, that fear suddenly giving way to a kind of confidence I didn't expect from her. Her smile was gone. "You know bad magic! I saw you do it!"

I stared at her for a moment, then looked forward at the others. "I have my reasons."

She stepped a little further away from me, shaking her head. "Granny Pie warned me about ponies like you. She told me I should stay away from bad ponies that use bad magic!"

"Oh?" I mused, glancing over at her. "And what would your Grandma know about bad magic?"

"Because some ponies tried to hurt her really bad with their bad magic once!" she said, shivering a little. "She stopped traveling into big cities after that. She wouldn't leave the farm for a whole year."

"I see...I'm very sorry to hear that."

I noticed she was trying to put more distance between us. I had to actively keep close to her until she was at one side of the already unmarked path we'd all found through the woods. My proximity to her seemed to make her far more tense than she had any business to be, though.

"Y-you're not gonna hurt me, right? Because I won't say anything, just don't...don't do anything to me out here!"

Oh. Forget Nightmare Moon, I had a very real situation on my hooves right here.

I quickly closed the distance between us and reached up, placing a forehoof on her wither. "Hey...look at me."

She froze and became still as a statue, a quiet whimper escaping her while we stood there, falling behind more than we already were. She slowly looked over at me, and I could see her entire body trembling despite the overall darkness enshrouding us. What happened to her Grandma to make her so afraid of ponies 'like me'? That kind of fear usually only comes from first-hoof experience...

"The only ponies I hurt are bad ponies, Pinkie," I said slowly, taking a deep breath to steady myself. "The kinds of ponies that hurt your Grandma."

I didn't like admitting that to her, but she already knew something about me I'd rather nobody knew if I could help it. Lying to her would only escalate things down the line, and if ever there was a pony that needed some kind of assurance that she was safe, it was Pinkie right there and then. It was almost disturbing to actually see her quaking on her hooves like she was. That wasn't the immature and rambunctious Pinkie Pie I'd gotten to know a bit better during last night's party.

"You promise?" she squeaked out to me, gazing into my eyes as if searching for the truth. "You're not gonna do anything to me? Because I know I know bad magic but I don't know how it works, but it usually happens because I always want to make ponies smile, so-"

"Pinkie."

She simply went quiet and gave me a small nod. I patted her on her wither and smiled a little at her.

"C'mon, it's not like you to not be smiling. I promise, I have no intention of hurting you or anyone else," I said, raising a hoof in the air as if to swear upon it. Then I faltered. "Well, except for Nightmare Moon. But she's got it coming."

She visibly relaxed in almost an instant, that poofy mane of hers suddenly popping up to full floofyness once again as she took in a deep breath and grinned.

"You Pinkie Promise?!" she asked, leaning in towards me until we were almost snout-to-snout. What was with these ponies and zero sense of personal space?!

"Uh...what's a Pinkie Promise? You mean like those promises the minotaurs make by hooking their pinkie fingers with the one they're making a promise to?" I asked, confused by the sudden heel-turn of her mood.

I swear, her eyes sparkled in that instant. She began to pronk around me as she giggled at the very prospect of having to explain what seemed like a not-so-universally accepted form of making a promise.

"It's the most super-serious of promises two friends can make, duh! Everypony in Ponyville knows what a Pinkie Promise is!" she said, stopping in front of me. "Breaking a Pinkie Promise is the fastest way to lose a friend forever, so you know that a Pinkie Promise is serious. Business!"

"Oookay. Well then," I said, clearing my throat. "How does one go about making a Pinkie Promise?"

Anything to help put her mind at ease, I told myself. She didn't even hesitate to go through the motions, and I took it all in and sat down in front of her.

"I promise to never tell anyone about your unique form of mind magic as long as you don't tell anyone about what I can do. Cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my-" I said, only to jab myself in the eye with the edge of my hoof. "Ow."

Pinkie just laughed at that and sat down in front of me, holding up a hoof. "And I, Pinkamena Diane Pie,-" Huh, so that's her full name? Neat. "-do promise that I will never tell anyone about your secret either!" she said, repeating the motions.

I smiled and nodded to her, and she suddenly lunged forward and gave me a full-on hug, her forelegs wrapping around my withers and squeezing some of the life out of me. I expected her to let me go pretty quickly, but she held me there for a pretty significant amount of time. You know, since we were supposed to be walking right now. I couldn't even see the others now.

I felt her begin to tremble against me, and the faint sound of her crying was easily made out among the other noises of the forest.

"Th-thanks, Twilight! Really! I was afraid I'd have to leave Ponyville..." she muttered, hugging me just a bit tighter. Was that a rib popping? "I can't let anypony know what I can do. I just wanna make everyone happy, but if they knew what I could do, they'd report me to the Royal Guard, and then they'd take me away and run experiments on me and dissect me to see how it works because I'm not a unicorn and that's weird!"

"Well, I won't deny you're weird," I squeaked out, gently pushing at her chest with a hoof until she backed off of me. "But I don't think anyone would dissect you like that."

"The bad ponies did. That was what they tried to do to my Granny-"

"Hey!" I heard from further up ahead. "What're you two doin' back there?! C'mon, we can hear a river up ahead!"

She and I both looked ahead for a moment before standing up and walking towards Applejack, who'd doubled back to see what was taking us so long. I looked over at Pinkie and gave her a small nod, and she just grinned at me.

"We'll talk about it more later, alright? Honestly...I'd like to do some tests to try to figure out how you're able to do that."

"Not mad scientist experiments, right?"

"I make no promises!"

"Pff-heeheehahah! You're silly, Twilight! Sure."

Even without her mind magic influencing me, Pinkie's unique brand of energetic cheer had me chuckling at her antics and feeling a bit more upbeat about everything. Logically I knew I didn't have much to be cheery about at the moment, but helping a pony relax around me? That's a good feeling. I don't get to enjoy those all that often.

That was far more scary than I let on though. Really, I was taking a huge gamble admitting to my own illegal magic to someone that was, in essence, just an acquaintance. She'd caught me red-hoofed just as I'd done the same to her however. I had no way to not tell her the truth, and I'm fairly certain that if I'd just tried to play it off, she would've called me out on it. No telling what her Granny Pie's told her about ponies like me.

Of course after that, what happened with Rarity was almost a non-event. We broke into a trot to catch up with the others, and soon enough I could hear the sounds of a river as well. Only, it sounded like the water was sloshing around and splashing a lot. On top of that, someone was crying. Well, whining at least, maybe not full-on weeping.

We were heading right for it, for good or ill, and when we found the source, I was shocked to find, of all things, a sea serpent. Why? Because rivers are generally fresh-water. They are called sea serpents for a reason. While I couldn't recall the name of this specific river off the top of my head at the time, I was entirely certain that water was drinkable. Therefore, what the fuck was a sea serpent doing in a fresh-water river?

Sure, sea serpents aren't exclusive to the ocean, but it's really rare to see one far from the Neighponese oceans surrounding their island...let alone finding one in the middle of the Everfree!

Even worse, whatever had him so flustered was causing him to roil the river waters into a frenzy. Ever wondered how sea serpents can move through the water so fast? They bend the water to their will reflexively. It's kinda like how our tactile kinesis works, they just sorta do it without thinking that much about it. Either way, we would be swept away by the current if we tried to cross right now, so I figured calming him down was a far more sure bet. Not to mention, he could offer us a much drier way across.

"Uh, excuse me sir!" I called out, trying to get his attention. "Mind if I ask what's got you so upset?"

"Well, I don't know!" he responded, lowering himself down enough so he didn't completely tower over us. "I was just sitting here washing off my scales and taking care of my mane, when this tacky little purple sparkly cloud whizzed past me and tore part of my mustache clean off!"

I resisted the urge to groan and roll my eyes at what was clearly a really tiny issue that would take maybe a couple of weeks for him to fix.

He rose back up to his full height and made several overly dramatic motions to properly signify just how traumatized he truly was. I would've smacked him if he were at eye-level.

"And now, I look awful!"

The waterworks began anew, for him and for our group, thanks to his renewed thrashing. His body flopped and sent a sizeable splash of water our way, and I threw up a barrier over myself on reflex. Had to admit, I was feeling back to a hundred percent after that nasty fall earlier! However, the nasty look Rarity was giving me for letting her get soaked, well...whoops? He was laying his head over the side of the river, why didn't she go give him a piece of her mind?

"Ugh, seriously?" I heard Rainbow say, the irritation clear on her face.

"That's what all the fuss is about?" Applejack added.

I didn't blame them for being thrown off by it. It really was a stupid thing to be crying over. Then again, as a purveyor of personal hygeine and taking almost obsessive care of my appearance and my clothes, I guess I could relate to an extent. I certainly wouldn't be whining like a bitch over some of my mane getting torn off though.

Rarity, however, seemed to be of the same mindset as our extremely metrosexual sea serpent acquaintance.

"Why of course it is!" she stated, giving both Rainbow and AJ a quick glare. "How can you be so insensitive?!"

She walked right up to him with a smile on her face, and I was curious to see where this was going. I'd seen things like this before...and he was certainly vain enough to totally get played like a fiddle.

"Look at him," she said with a little pouty tone, stroking a hoof over his chin. "Such lovely, luminescent scales!"

He sniffled a little and looked down at her. "I-I know...!"

"And your expertly coiffed mane!" she said, the raw flattery on her tongue almost palpable to me.

He lifted himself up and ran a hand over his hair. "Oh I know, I know!"

"Your fabulous manicure!"

I'd say she was laying it on a bit thick, but considering how thickly he was laying it on already, excess seemed to be the name of the game here. Had to hoof it to her, she knew how to play him. I got the distinct impression she was used to doing that sort of thing with her customers.

He gasped at the compliment, the pure joy from such a simple comment making him cup his cheeks in delight. "It's so true~!"

"All ruined without your beautiful moustache!" I heard Rarity say.

"Oh it's true, I'm hideous!"

Aaand down he went. Partially. More like a slump. Reminded me of the Hunchback of Notre Dame, except infinitely less ugly and not a griffon.

"I simply cannot allow this crime against fabulosity to go uncorrected!"

She actually surprised me with the resolve she seemed to have. I think I was mistaking it for flair and fronting earlier, because she just kinda went in and bit down on one of the sea serpent's scales and ripped it out. I cringed at the very idea of it. I remember one time Spike fell funny on his front and one of his scales got bent out of place. He was crying up a storm, lemme tell ya! Got even worse when I actually plucked it off of him.

"OW!! What'd you do that for?!" I heard him half-shout. I even saw a stray tear escape his eye. Guess scale-plucking is kinda like plucking pegasus feathers before they're ready to come off.

She didn't even hesitate, and she really should've. She cut off her tail...with no clothes to wear. If I really need to explain why that makes for certain issues with ponies that go naked, then your mind's not dirty enough. I mean it wasn't all gone, but it was short enough to not leave a single thing to your imagination!

Then the sea serpent mock-fainted from the act. I wasn't even going to ask. I think he was being flamboyant for the sake of being flamboyant.

The moment of awe came for me when Rarity took her cut-off tail and, in the blink of an eye, connected it to the torn-up stubble of what was left of the one-half of his moustache. You remember what I said about her being able to manipulate numerous things at one time with remarkable precision? Well, she one-upped that by tying every individual strand of her tail to the strands of his remaining moustache. Just, the focus you'd need...! I can't even fathom it.

Thoughts of Rarity secretly being some kind of Neighponese samurai or a griffon-trained monk aside, the sea serpent who we quickly learned was named Steven Magnet was very grateful...despite Rarity's tail garishly clashing with the normal color of his moustache. I couldn't help myself in the aftermath of that.

"Ah, Rarity...did you think about cutting off your tail, or was it a spur-of-the-moment thing?" I asked, motioning to the bit that was left on her rump.

I tried really hard not to look, but...okay, I'm lying. I ogled and stared before I said anything, and I couldn't help but take a peek once I got closer to her! Seriously, she had no tail to hide anything! Like a Celestia-damned eyeball buffet up in here.

I get the feeling she saw me looking, because no sooner did she look back at me than she quickly stepped away and turned to face all of us.

"O-oh! It's fine my dear," she said, trying to compose herself despite my social faux pas. "Short tails are in this season! Besides, it'll grow back just fine."

She was right. Go to Canterlot and you can see a lot of short tails on mares and stallions alike, as long as they're wearing clothes. Styles of the rich and famous, so to speak.

"Yyyeah, but you don't have any clothes, so..."

She blushed profusely at that and huffed, flicking her mane with her hoof. "Well I suppose I will simply have to depend on the rest of you being proper ladies, won't I?"

I grinned a bit and shrugged. "I can give it a shot, but I'm not making any promises!"

She looked at me aghast, then humph'ed and turned to walk away, attempting to snap her tail...which wasn't there. Immediately afterward, she realized what she'd done, and the way her face turned scarlet was priceless! I tried to hold back my laughter, but with the others giggling as well, I couldn't help but let out a few chuckles of my own.

"Hmph! You laugh at me, but I was only being generous!" she said, turning her nose up at us in disgust. "Ogling a fine lady like myself when she's so vulnerable...! You should all be ashamed of yourselves!"

"Ashamed? Me? Nah," I said, casually brushing it off and stepping up next to her. "But for what it's worth, I'm sorry that I looked and made you uncomfortable. It was very inappropriate of me."

She nodded as I approached her, smiling slightly. "Well, that is very mature of you to say, and I accept your-"

"Really nice view though~!"

You don't know cute until you've heard Rarity hold back a scream. Her cheeks bulged a little, her cheeks turned red as a tomato and she stamped her hooves in frustration before turning to bat at me with her forehooves, thwapping them against my side and my withers before turning and urging me forward.

"You be quiet you uncouth pervert, and take the lead! I clearly can't trust you to walk behind me for any reason!"

The girls were cracking up laughing and so was I, and soon after, Rarity joined in. Perhaps she knew I was joking, or maybe she thought I was anyways. It really was a nice view, no joke there.

Even Steven was chuckling a bit at our antics, but he settled us down pretty quick.

"Yes, maybe it was a tad brash of you to cut off your own tail dearie, but I appreciate it," he said, gently curling it around his finger. "So very generous of you!"

Rarity waved it off with a more genuine smile. "Oh, pff, think nothing of it! It's just hair! My beauty matters little when you were in such distress. Why shouldn't I have been generous?"

"Too true, my dear! I'll take that life lesson to heart." he said, looking between us for a moment.

I motioned towards the other side of the river, looking up at him. "If you don't mind, could you help us across?"

"Of course! After what you did for me, what kind of gentledrake would I be if I didn't help you out?" he said, raising his body in a serpentine pattern that brought his body out of the water in several places. "Go ahead, ladies!"

We hopped our way across to the other side and, with a quick wave goodbye to Steven, we continued on our way. It only occurred to me in that moment just how much of an adventure we'd found ourselves in, this deep into the Everfree. Like something out of a children's book, a story you'd read to your filly or colt before bed to fill their minds with thoughts of heroes and grand adventures where everything goes great for the heroes and the villains are so one-dimensional that they're doomed to failure from the outset. We were questing for the Elements of Harmony after all, even if the others didn't realize it...and Nightmare Moon was not going to win.

Rarity came up and nudged my side with hers. "Er, so...forgive me if this is forward, but...are you attracted to mares?"

I shrugged a little. "I prefer them, though stallions can be nice too. Why?"

"Oh, no reason! Just...just wondering," she said slowly, clearing her throat. "I just wanted to know if your taunting was flirtatious in nature or simple...well, taunting."

I smirked at that and gave her a small nudge. "A little of both, really."

"Ah."

The silence that pressed in around us was a bit awkward, especially since the others had heard all of that as well. I personally didn't care all that much. Why would I care if they knew? Homosexual tendencies weren't all that uncommon, though if you were a stallion you were viewed with a bit of contempt compared to being a gay mare. Oh, the ignorant dogma against anal...among other things.

Plus I'm sure that Rarity was a bit off-put by the fact that a noble admitted to being somewhat gay. That's not the sort of thing a noble really does, you see. We are set to a higher standard, as the ways of the old world would dictate! Back when gay activity was persecuted and ponies could be lynched for being 'faggots'. Disgusting. Then again, if I were born back then, I might think lynching the gays would be totally acceptable, reasonable even! Who knows?

In any case, we continued on, and it began to make me nervous just how close we were getting to the castle. It was hard to see the highest spires in the darkness and with the canopy getting in the way a lot, but we were definitely almost there. The moment we reached the next clearing, we could see it in all its ancient majesty.

Decrepit would be a more accurate description, actually. The place was run-down and falling apart, and even the perimeter of it was inexplicably collapsed all around the castle, barring entry save for getting over there by air or by bridge. Speaking of bridges....

"Weeeeellll, shit." I muttered, walking over to look at the busted rope bridge that had, at one point, been perfectly functional.

"Aww, now how're we gonna get across?!" Pinkie shouted as she approached.

I could've teleported all of us over, but this was one of those situations where I needed to consider the use of my magic a last resort. I was still firmly of the mindset that I'd need everything I had to deal with Nightmare Moon at that point, and I didn't want to waste it teleporting five civilians over a chasm.

Fortunately, the bridge seemed serviceable, the ropes had just come loose on one side over the years; re-securing it would be a breeze. Rainbow had that under control. She flew down and grabbed the hanging end of the rope bridge and took it back up, and began tying it onto the post on the other side while we waited.

"It's a really spooky castle...i-isn't it?" I heard Fluttershy say.

I glanced up at the mighty stone structure once more, taking the chance to take a few deep, calming breaths and settle myself down. Shame that didn't work out so well for me.

"Rainbow..."

I perked my ears up immediately. That wasn't one of us, because it wasn't something that was purely sound, or at least I thought it wasn't. The fact that Pinkie seemed to notice it too alarmed me, because no one else did. Something about that sound was partially mind magic, and I couldn't feel the source. It felt as if the magic itself had been on the wind, and had faded away just as quickly.

"Rainbow~...!"

Okay, that one I definitely heard, and judging by the look on Pinkie's face, she heard it plain as day too. I made a discreet motion to her with my hoof for her to stay quiet, then made a circular motion while looking around the area. She seemed to take the hint, but if she was actually attempting to be subtle, she was doing an absolutely horrible job at it. I don't think stealth is her forte.

"Twilight!"

I turned to look at Pinkie, and out of the corner of my eye as I turned, I saw what she must've been ready to point out to me. Across the chasm, three pegasi were conversing with Rainbow Dash. My blood ran cold at what Pinkie said next.

"They just appeared from the shadows!" she exclaimed.

I could feel them now. They were giving off an ambient aura of mental compulsion, further sharpened by their honeyed words. I didn't even hesitate when I attempted to teleport over to her. Key word being 'attempted'.

The backlash I felt threatened to make me black out for a minute, with how hard it hit me. It was only my training with the guard and my experience with magic that helped me brace myself against it. Didn't stop me from collapsing into a laying position. Pinkie was on me in an instant, and the others rushed over to help me as well, probably from the loud magical pop of me briefly winking out of existence, then suddenly snapping back in a dulled blast of mana. Rainbow didn't seem to notice, probably because they had her full attention.

I looked across the chasm, and on the other side, right under where the rope bridge was, was a pulsating warding rune. I had to really focus to see it, but it was there. Unicorns have a unique kind of vision, and it's the basis behind the arrays we construct to cast spells safely, and this one...no wonder I could barely see it. I was only seeing a part of it at once. It existed in separate pieces at several different tiers of complexity! A work of art if ever there was one. I really wished my head hadn't been throbbing like a little drummer colt was dancing around in my head so I could've fully appreciated it at the time.

Think of our ability to see magic and arrays as you would a camera, zooming in and out, but instead of bringing things in and out of focus, we see magic in different layers of intensity. As you focus on one layer, others blur or even fade out entirely. Mind you this has no effect on our normal vision, it's just sort of like...hm. Like seeing layers overlapping reality. Pegasi and earth ponies usually never see this, but that's just because they lack the training for it. It's also difficult to teach them because they can't use or feel magic the same way us unicorns do.

Of course, that ward meant that she anticipated this, because there was no way she cast that rune while we were standing there. That meant that Nightmare Moon had been watching us every step of the way, and she anticipated my ability to use magic to solve this little conundrum. Now, she had one of us isolated from the rest, like a lion waiting for that one stupid animal to break away from the rest of the herd.

That clever bitch. She knew this would happen and if it wasn't me, it would've been Fluttershy or Rainbow Dash!

I quickly forced myself to my hooves, using Pinkie as my support. I could feel magic gathering in the air, because it seemed like she had taken notice of the fact that I had taken notice, and already had measures in place; magic-borne fog was welling up from the chasm from both directions.

Magic rushed to my horn and I rapidly worked to emulate the form of mind magic she was using on Rainbow, before the fog blocked us out completely. I knew what kind of fog that was, I could see it without hardly looking at it with any level of scrutiny. She was trying to block us out! It'd make it easier for her to influence Rainbow Dash, you see.

I sparked my horn and prepared my own mind magic to combat hers, calling out over the chasm.

"Rainbow! Don't listen to them!"

It was all I had time to say before the fog obscured our view completely, and I ceased being able to feel anything from the other side. I could only hope that my own influence managed to worm its way into her well enough to ward Nightmare Moon's attempts until we could find a way across. I considered asking Fluttershy to fly over there, but what would she be able to do? Especially if Nightmare managed to turn Rainbow Dash against us. Then it would just be Fluttershy fighting against a mind-controlled pegasus that's faster and more physically fit than she is, on her own. Not good odds.

I had to calm them all down and try to think of something...or at least, I thought I did. The truth was, while they certainly weren't calm, all of our worries over Rainbow Dash's well-being were very...exaggerated. Not two minutes after I began to formulate a plan to get this fog dispersed enough for me to get over there, the fog faded back down into the chasm and Rainbow flew back over to us, the rope bridge once again secured.

The girls cheered when she landed in front of us, but I hung back, discreetly looking her over, cycling through every layer of magic available. Nothing. Not even a hint of Nightmare Moon's magic on her, just what I'd influenced her with. How...? There's no way she resisted that completely, she didn't even know what she was dealing with!

"So," I said, approaching her slowly. "What happened?"

"Eh, it was nothin' special," Rainbow said, fluttering her wings a little before tucking them in against her sides. "Some losers callin' themselves the Shadowbolts tried to get me to join their team and leave you guys stranded out here."

"Huh. Alright," I muttered. "Aaand...why didn't you go with them?"

"Pff, what?! Rainbow Dash doesn't leave her friends hangin'!"

I got the feeling that I just didn't know as much as I wished I did about mind magic, because that explained exactly nothing. Did it have something to do with her conviction? Heh, or maybe was she too hard-headed to allow herself to be brainwashed? It could go either way, if you ask me.

I was still suspicious of course, but whatever those Shadowbolts were...she created them. That meant she had to be close by, and that meant she was probably already in the castle. We needed to get in there as quickly as we possibly could, and track her down. Maybe we'd find the Elements of Harmony while we were at it? They were in there somewhere....

I'd specifically tried to avoid talking to anyone about them. The reference guide I'd found regarding them was fairly vague about their legend and what it had to do with Nightmare Moon as well. The only strange thing I'd noticed in the illustrations is that all of them had Celestia's mane and tail colored a solid pink until she banished her sister to the moon. After that it was all pastel rainbow, all the time. I tried to ask her about it once, but it was one of the only times she'd actually become evasive about giving me a straight answer.

Once we were across the bridge, Rainbow Dash stopped me while the others continued ahead. She didn't say anything until the others had put some distance between us.

"So hey, uh...I'm not so good at this whole apology thing," she said slowly, flying above me by a few inches. "But, what I said before? Back in town? My mouth just kinda runs away from me sometimes...that was totally my bad."

"What, calling me a hornhead? I'd almost forgotten about that," I muttered, shrugging my withers. "It's no big deal. I know all about that. Heat of the moment. Nothing to forgive."

"Phew! That's a load off my back then!" she said, landing in front of me. "So, we're still cool then?" she muttered, raising a hoof up and holding it out to me.

I quickly clopped one of my forehooves against hers. "Yeah, we're cool. Maybe cooler." I said, glancing over to the bridge. "...You really wouldn't have abandoned us, huh?"

"I don't leave my friends hangin'. That's not how Rainbow Dash flies." she said, her cocky smile replaced by a serious gaze.

I stared back at her for a moment, then gave her a small nod. "Alright then. Just so you know," I said, pointing at the castle. "We're going to get attacked in there. Some way, not sure how yet. We might even die. You still down for this?"

Her wings fluttered slightly, her stance wilting just a little before she stood up tall, grinning wide and taking to the air again.

"You can count on me!"

"Huh. Color me surprised," I said, grinning and heading over towards the entrance, where they were waiting for us. "C'mon then! Let's go kick an alicorn's ass, shall we?"

The sudden cheer from her was followed by the pegasus swooping through the air towards our other companions, and I followed suit with a small smile and a feeling of security that I didn't normally feel with others. I felt like I could depend on her if something bad happened...that wasn't a feeling I was familiar with at all. Everyone I'd ever worked with in the past, they were just sort of...I dunno, meat shields if something went down? That's the only way I can describe them, thinking back.

They weren't ponies I ever really concerned myself with back then. If they died, well, one less pony to worry about. These girls though, they weren't ponies I was willing to sacrifice under any circumstance I might run into out here.

I looked up at the castle looming over us, pondering on the situation. These five were different to me. Why was that?

Author's Note

Yeah, I had to cut it in half again! Seriously, didn't see this coming.

Chapter 9 - Eternal Night (Pt. 5)

written by Fire Soul

We stepped into the castle without a word, though the girls seemed strangely jovial about it all. Rarity was bothered by the 'drab decor', and Fluttershy was obviously unnerved, but she was holding up well considering where she was. I was surprised that she even entered the Everfree to begin with.

"Okay, first things first," I started, walking ahead of them. "We need to find the...uh."

What had rendered me speechless? Oh, I don't know, maybe it was the fact that the Elements of Harmony were sitting on a big fancy stand atop an old plinth, out where anyone could've found them if they ever bothered to come out here?!

I ran my hoof over my face in exasperation. "Oh for fuck's sake Celestia why?"

How had no one ever found these things before? Were adult ponies just that illiterate outside of Canterlot? Or well, that limited in their intellectual diversity? Every library has a reference guide about the Elements of Harmony, I will ask again, how did no one ever find these before now?!

I sighed and shook it off, shaking my head slowly. "Stay focused, don't have time for this..." I mumbled to myself.

I lit my horn and wrapped my magic around each of the Elements, gently carrying them down in front of myself, looking over them carefully. There was an unexpected dimming of power around them as I did so, but since I had no time to examine it properly, I ignored it. From what I'd seen of the reference guides, these had to be it, the odd sensation I got from them was almost exactly how the books described them. However...there were only five of them here. Considering I had no idea what those books meant by a spark, I needed to do some basic experimentation.

"Okay ladies. Elements of Harmony. Dunno what's going to happen, so I need you all to give me some distance," I said, laying down in front of the gathered Elements and scanning over them with my magic. "Don't go too far though. We don't know where Nightmare Moon might be hiding, so make sure you all stay together."

They all gave an affirmative, and soon I found myself alone in the hall. I glanced over the Elements and thought back to what I'd read in the book, the legend written down in it coming back to me.

When the five are present, a spark will cause the sixth to be revealed. No indication of whether it would be based on location or anything, or whether the sixth Element was somehow different from the others considering the other five were all sealed in stone...hm. A spark. Perhaps a spark of magic? I could only hope it would work. We needed these things right now, we couldn't afford a delay on using them with Nightmare Moon somewhere nearby!

Unfortunately...she was closer than I thought she was. I felt a gust kick up around me, and all it took was a second of looking away to evaluate my surroundings for her to swoop in with her stupid starry cloud to surround the Elements. I felt magic charging in the air around me, and one glance into the swirling blackness in front of me told me what she was doing.

"Girls!" I shouted out to get their attention, just before I dove into the darkness.

It wasn't like a normal teleportation. There was something almost elegant about it, how it made you linger in that feeling of magical tingle as you transitioned from one place to another. My guess was on it being a more primitive teleportation spell unique to Nightmare Moon's magic, because I'd never read anything about teleportation being utilized in such a strange and inefficient way. Then again, I suppose when you've got the power to move an entire celestial body around the world, efficiency isn't as big of a concern for you as it is for most ponies.

I fell out of the teleportation and flopped onto the ground, knocking the wind out of myself for a moment while that black vortex swished over towards an elevated platform on the other side of the room. Nightmare Moon formed from the blackness, and the Elements appeared around her, dropping to the ground with a noisy, stony clonk.

"Thank you so very much, Twilight Sparkle," she said calmly, running a hoof over one of the stone orbs. "I never would have found them without you."

I pushed myself to my hooves slowly and dusted myself off a bit. "They were sitting out in the open, even a foal could've found them."

"Yes, well, they looked very different back then. For one, they weren't orbs of solid rock. I suppose they disapproved of my sister using them against me," she said, smirking a little. "How unfortunate for her, and for you."

"So you used me to identify them for you first," I muttered, frowning a little. "Then you swiped them."

"Oh I assure you that if I'd had time to research them as you no doubt did, I would have done so myself. Then I could have broken all your legs and retrieved them on my own!" she said with a wide grin, those razor-sharp teeth glinting in the moonlight. "You would never have been able to enter the Everfree for such a fruitless endeavor, if that had been the case."

"You'll forgive me for not being thankful." I said flatly. "In any case, you've got my Elements. Hoof 'em over."

"The mortal dares to tell me what to do?"

"Well, considering you haven't simply obliterated me for my insolence," I said, stretching out the muscles in my neck by twisting my head this way and that. "I have to assume you aren't as powerful as you say you are. At least, not right now."

She huffed in amusement. "And what brought you to that conclusion, smart little pony?"

"You fought Celestia. Even now, I'm sure she's thrashing and fighting against her imprisonment. I'll bet it takes a lot of energy to maintain her banishment..." I said, unable to help a smug smile. "Not like when the seemingly limitless Elements banished you for a thousand years."

You have no idea how satisfying it was to see that cocky, holier-than-thou grin disappear from her muzzle.

"And considering how weakened you must be after banishing your sister," I said, lowering my stance and lighting my horn with magic once more. "I'm fairly sure I can take you. Even if I can't, I'm sure the Magus and the Royal Guard can."

"...Twilight Sparkle," she said quietly, stepping down from the elevated platform, those slitted cat-like eyes glaring at me with an intensity I was all too familiar with. "You are arrogant, and a fool...but I will not deny that you are smart. Do not throw your life away so readily."

"Oh, honey," I said with a widening smile. "You can't intimidate me. Even if you manage to kill me, I'm gonna make sure you burn yourself out in the process. For the glory of Equestria and all that."

"I am warning you, Twilight Sparkle," she half-shouted at me, lowering her stance just as I was, her horn pointing at me. "Kneel."

I eased up a little as a thought struck me. "You've been trying really hard to spare lives. Strange, given your plans."

"Well, a Queen needs her subjects, her servants." she said, rolling her eyes.

I quirked a brow at that. "Aaand what makes you think anyone will serve under you?"

"Oh, that's quite simple," she muttered. "If they do not, they will wish they were dead."

Ooh, such intimidating words! Then again, I was fairly sure she meant all of it.

"What about when we're all dead?" I asked, tilting my head a little. "You'll be all alone. No one to feed you grapes while you lounge on your throne like a beautiful Caligula."

"For a time, yes," she said. "But I have all the time in the universe. Also, I have...other ways to repopulate this world."

"What, you gonna hump the trees until you have a miracle foal or something?"

"Such a sharp and vulgar tongue for a noblemare!" she said, stalking towards me.

"Believe me, plenty of mares and stallions have found great appreciation for it," I teased back, grinning a little. "Judging by the way your tail's flagging, you're curious too."

She seemed confused at first. What, did she not notice the way she was raising her tail? Kind of a strange thing to not notice. Then again, if I'd known then what I do now, it would've made perfect sense to me. At the time, I expected better self-control from a Princess, but then again....

She turned her head to one side with a snap and looked back at her tail, a small frustrated growl easily heard in the echoing emptiness of what was a large hall all around us. She forced her tail back down and sneered at me, her horn lighting up with a dark almost pitch-black aura.

Guess I needed to push her buttons a bit more. "I mean, a thousand years on the moon is a long time to go without some companionship! Wouldn't surprise me if you were more soaked than the rocks you fucked yourself with-"

"SILENCE!!!"

I almost didn't see the blast of magic coming. It was unrefined, outdated in its design, but there was no denying the power behind it. Guess I threw her off more than I thought.

I rolled off to my right and fired a bright flash of magic at her in the shape of a ball. I clenched my eyes shut just before the ball of magic exploded in a burst of blinding light, and the howling scream she let off echoed through the chamber.

"No need to be so aggressive about your desires, Princess!" I taunted, dodging to the right once more as she blindly fired a magic missile in my direction. "I'm more than willing to satisfy you! You just have to bring Celestia back and surrender!"

"How are you doing that?!" she asked, her eyes clenched shut and blinking rapidly while her tail swished this way and that in base excitement.

"Doing what, your majesty~?" I asked, grinning a little. "I'm just talking about getting so deep into you that you scream my name for all of Equestria to hear. Nothing more. Nothing but words and the flapping of my dextrous, experienced tongue that's had many a mare writhing upon my bed...!"

I had to hold back my laughter as her hindlegs trembled and her haunches visibly tensed and quivered, a light wet sound barely audible as she groaned and lowered her head a little. It struck me as strange that she didn't get what I was doing. It was so blatantly obvious that she was pent up beyond what might be considered psychologically healthy, how could she not get it?

"You think you can toy with me, little pony?" she muttered, the frustration in her voice all too evident. "Blind me and taunt me with salacious, false words...."

I quirked a brow as she jumped back and her horn flared to life even more than it already was, that familiar billowing starry smoke swelling out from her mane and tail, slowly pouring over the room. I rapidly retreated towards the large doorway in the back, while the billowing cloud began to rise up, engulfing the entire room in darkness.

Behind me, I could hear hoofsteps over the sound of magic being cast in front of me. Fearing a blast of magic to come at me out of nowhere, I erected a barrier to cover the area in front of myself.

"This way!" I called out down the staircase behind me, focusing on the room in front of me as the billowing smoke began to clear.

All around me...constructs. Arcane constructs, of all three pony races. Pegasi fluttered in the air in a small swarm, several unicorns formed a line in front of Nightmare Moon, and between me and them, a large number of earth pony constructs.

While this only further proved my theory about her current weakness, that was a lot of constructs. Far more than I could deal with, even if I did use my magic to the fullest. This was an old decrepit castle; using an explosive blast could bring the roof caving in around me, as well as those that came with me. Anything above the fourth tier of offensive spells was right out not just because the risk of my surroundings crushing me to death afterwards, but also because they all took some prep time. A significant amount in some cases, not to mention some actually required special ingredients.

"Not so willing to run your mouth now, are you Twilight Sparkle?!" I heard Nightmare shout across the room at me.

"Nah, not really!" I shouted back at her. "I bought myself enough time!"

I could hear them calling out to me, and it seemed Nightmare Moon could as well, probably through her constructs. The earth pony ones lunged at my barrier, battering and beating at it to try and bring it down, but they were flimsy at best compared to the raw strength of a true earth pony. I bolstered my shield and turned to face all of them, layering a veil of silence over the inside of the shield to give us some privacy. If she could hear us through her constructs, I needed to cut them off.

They were all at the top of the steps mere seconds after I turned around to greet them. Rarity and Fluttershy were having trouble catching their breaths, but the other three seemed just fine. Good to know. They were beginning to bombard me with questions, but they went silent at the sight just behind me.

"Wow, that's...that's a lotta meanies," Pinkie said, her voice sounding oddly serious, for her anyways. "Good thing we got here when we did."

"Unfortunately," I said loudly to grab their attention. "We don't have too much time to talk, I'm wasting magic just holding them back. Who here is willing to fight?"

Needless to say, they hesitated. Well, except for Rainbow Dash, but she's a crazy bitch like that, and she said she had my back, so I guess I shouldn't have expected any less. If anything, I was surprised by Fluttershy's willingness to fight. Still, I wasn't going to turn her down!

"I need us to cut a line through this crowd so I can get a clear shot on Nightmare Moon. She's controlling all of these constructs, but they're far weaker than they look, and they certainly aren't alive," I explained, my horn glowing brighter while I looked between them. "Each of you, present your dominant forehoof. I'm going to give you something you can use to cut through the magic sustaining their physical forms."

I already had a good enough weapon, and sustaining these weapons for them would be vaguely taxing on me, but as long as we got through this crowd as quickly as possible, it was worth it. The spell was called Arcane Sword, and it was designed specifically to brute-force your way through physical manifestations of magic. Got a rune you want to ruin? Cut through it with the Arcane Sword. Got a construct whose leylines you want to shatter? Arcane Sword.

I lowered my horn to their presented hooves and weaved my magic around them, leaving each of them with a purple-colored glowing blade attached to their forelegs. I could feel the pull on my magic as I stepped back, motioning to the crowd behind me.

"This weapon will cut through them like butter. On top of that, you cannot hurt each other with it, so don't be afraid to swing if one of them is attacking your partner," I said, raising a hoof to smack it over the end of Applejack's blade. It passed right through. "At most, it'll cause a tingle."

They all gave me a quick nod. Good, at least they were paying attention, and they were quick-minded enough to keep up with what I was saying. It would've been annoying if I had to slow down for them.

"Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, I want you both to take to the air and bring those flying constructs down where I can pick them off with my magic. Keep them busy, and only fight them off if you have to. They have no sense of self-preservation, and they'll gladly tackle you out of the sky just to injure you," I explained, looking to Applejack, Pinkie and Rarity. "Rarity and Applejack, you're a team. Watch each other's back, that's standard guard practice. These things start to overwhelm your partner, you back off and help them out, no exceptions. Pinkie, you're with me. Same rules apply, that goes for you and Fluttershy too, Rainbow!"

"Sheesh, bossy..." I heard Rainbow mutter.

"I'm not fucking around here! We're outnumbered, and I don't care if those things are flimsy compared to us, they could still swarm us with sheer numbers if we're not careful! Stay close to each other, and don't stray from the plan," I stated firmly, patting one of my pistols with a hoof. "The moment I break her concentration, this whole crowd's gonna become a whole lot of nothing."

I raised up onto my hindlegs and reached for the lock on the hoofblade I'd borrowed. It wouldn't be as efficient as using an Arcane Sword myself, but a Royal Guard's weapon always had a certain uniqueness to it. I'd failed to check to see what kind of advanced smithing Freewind had gotten done for his hoofblade, but now that I looked at it...I was pleasantly surprised to find a silver sheen to the edge.

Silver was an excellent conduit for magic, and if treated just the right way and laced through steel during the smelting process, it became a great way to store a magical charge for hours at a time. Nowhere near as good or as versatile as gold, but for the purposes of the Royal Guard it was an excellent cheaper option. I'm guessing Freewind worked with a lot of unicorns to have had such a thing done to his hoofblade. No complaints here!

I poured my magic into the blade. The silver sheen reacted with a brief shimmer before a quickly weaved array turned the magic into exactly what I wanted it to be: fire. I gave it a few swings to be sure, then I looked to the others once more.

"These things are flimsy, but they outnumber us. When you swing, swing in hard, sweeping arcs. As long as you can cut the flow of magic in them, they will dissipate of their own accord," I explained quickly, turning to face the horde that was pushing and banging at my barrier with an annoying level of insistence. "Above all else, stay very close to me. Are you all ready?"

"Uh, sugarcube, ya sure we don't have time ta just sit down an' talk about this...?"

"I'm very sure. Now," I said, pouring more magic into my horn and raising up my right foreleg, the one my hoofblade was attached to. "I'm about to drop the barrier. Ten seconds."

I counted down slowly, listening for any kind of hesitation from them, but aside from some obvious nervousness, none of them faltered. I expected at least a whimper from Fluttershy, but she was staying very close to Rainbow Dash, so perhaps she was stronger than I gave her credit for.

The moment the countdown reached two, I poured magic into my barrier and pushed it outward, sending the bunched-up constructs flying back, giving us plenty of space to move. I lunged forward, my hoofblade crossed over my chest.

"NOW! On me!"

Some might question why I didn't use my guns. I'm sure they were questioning it too. The simple answer is, constructs are destroyed when their leylines are broken, and in constructs, the leylines act as a thin skeletal structure. Unless I have perfect aim, chances are, I'm going to miss a decent amount of shots, and I only have so many bullets.

The force of my shield had knocked a great number of them onto their backs and off of their hooves, and we all took the opportunity to start cutting a line forward. Her unicorn constructs fired a volley of magic into the air, arcing over the other constructs and flying right for us. I reached for them with my magic and yanked them out of the flimsy, unfocused grasp of our assailants and slammed them straight down, small bursts of magic lighting up the room and sending numerous constructs flying ahead of us.

The resounding electric pop of magical circuits being forcibly severed began to sound off all around me, and as my blade cut and burned through them, I could see the others haphazardly swinging their weapons through them as well. Applejack and Rainbow Dash swung with confidence, the fizzling crackle of the magic easily heard as their weapons cut through the air.

Rarity was perhaps the most surprising. She showed a level of competence with her blade that suggested some kind of experience. Instead of following my instructions, she fought as if she were wielding a rapier, jabbing and making quick twists of her hoof that she used to cut and slice into them. I think just how easily the blade cut through them actually surprised her. She actually started to swing with a bit more of an arc after the first few.

Pinkie Pie seemed to be taking my lessons to heart, though her method of fighting was...unique, to say the least. Cartwheels, darting around, jumping on the constructs that got close to us, just to name a few of her zany antics...even I had a hard time keeping up with her! There was a calculating comprehension of the situation though, and with how unpredictable her actions were, I suppose there was something ingenious about what she was doing. She didn't even hesitate to swing her weapon clean through me.

Fluttershy was, by far, the one I was worried about the most. That mare didn't seem to have a single violent bone in her body, with how hesitant she was to swing her sword at all. She had no combat experience, and no real mentality for combat to begin with. She was and still is the type that would be better off staying far away from conflict, but then again, she also chose to wade into this with us. I don't know if that makes her brave, stubborn, or foolish.

Either way, Rainbow was doing a good job keeping Fluttershy safe, so I kept my focus on cutting down whatever got in front of me. While the hoofblade I was using lacked the clean cutting power of the Arcane Sword, the addition of fire and a little muscle still let me cut through the constructs well enough that I wasn't wearing myself out. I would've been better off with a mace or some kind of weighted blunt instrument of equal effectiveness, but the fire burned through their 'skin' and helped to degrade the leylines inside their bodies well enough for my purposes.

Destroying all of them wasn't the goal, thankfully. Otherwise, I would've burned through my magic far too fast, especially since I could see her making more as we cut them down. We were making progress slowly but surely, and when we got close enough to the unicorns, they launched balls of magic directly at us. I suppose she figured the constructs behind us were now expendable, since we got that far.

I put up a barrier and launched an explosive fireball directly at the center of their line, sending the constructs flying and buying myself a clear shot. The other constructs were already moving to block our way while Nightmare Moon just sat there on the elevated platform, her eyes closed in concentration. Time to disrupt that.

I quickly used my magic to sheathe my hoofblade and reached for one of the pistols I'd brought with me, lining up my shot before I even pulled it out of the holster. I couldn't risk aiming for more vital organs, but she was seated at a slight angle facing towards my left.

The moment I had the pistol leveled at her right foreleg, I took my shot.

The sudden shriek of pain she let out was followed by a resounding collapse all around us. I could hear every single construct around us falling to the ground, disoriented and completely inert, with some of them fading away entirely. The pegasi constructs were falling out of the air and breaking themselves on the stone floor, and the remaining unicorn constructs were actually exploding their own heads due to losing control of themselves in the middle of casting magic.

Nightmare Moon's eyes shot wide open when the bullet hit and embedded itself in her knee. I guess my sessions spent picking apart Pin Point's mind and taking what I wanted from him paid off. I took a second shot just above her knee the moment she tried to get a look at the wound, and she shouted in alarm and pain once more as another bullet impacted her raised foreleg.

Judging by how surprised she was, she either expected me to use magic, or she didn't know what a gun was. Maybe both. Either way, she reacted fast enough to throw up a barrier in front of herself. That didn't really concern me though. What I was focused on was the two wounds in her foreleg. I needed to be at least reasonably sure of an alicorn's regenerative properties before I got any more lethal with my attacks on her.

I did take note of the nature of her barrier though. Her knowledge of magic was primitive compared to mine if her barrier was anything to go by. Modern barriers had various designs, ranging from bouncing physical objects off of them to having an oscillating property that caused projectiles to be redirected around it instead of deflecting off of it. Hers was the most standard of barriers, all-purpose and very inefficient at conserving one's mana. Not to mention...very brittle, in comparison to a modern mage's standards.

She stumbled and winced a little as she lifted her leg a bit further to examine the wounds, and just as I suspected, they were already beginning to close up. That matched what I'd seen with Celestia once. Nothing particularly extreme, but the reason I suspected regenerative qualities in the first place was because Celestia accidentally cut herself with a knife during one of our late-night cake raids. It was pretty deep and I was kinda worried, 'cuz it was the first time I'd ever even heard of her being able to be hurt, let alone seeing it, but aside from wincing a little, she just left it alone. Next thing I know, like ten seconds later, she's rinsing the blood out of her fur in one of the sinks and the cut's completely gone.

I questioned her about it of course, since I didn't see any magic coming from her horn that could've possibly patched it up, somehow. There are no spells that can induce such rapid regeneration without risking complications like cancer or harmful growths in the body of the one under said spell. Trust me, the medical field spent thousands of years trying to find that kind of miracle magic, but to no avail...aside from the zebras, and even their method comes with extreme complications, as far as I know. Doesn't make their miracle potion any less desirable, but their entire race is very against sharing their alchemy secrets.

What I didn't question her about however, was her sister. Not that that's surprising, since at the time I didn't know that she even had one. Obviously, I didn't bother to ask if her sister had the same regenerative properties as she did. What I did know, however, was that that regeneration was a conscious effort, and I could only imagine how that could drastically alter one's perception of the severity of injuries. Just imagine getting the bottom of your hoof sliced open and instead of screaming in panic, you just stare at it like 'oh, ow, that really hurts but it's no big deal', and then a little later you patch it up as if it never happened, like flexing a muscle.

I was sure there was more to it, but she was reluctant to talk about it. Not that I blame her, I doubt I'd want a lot of ponies to know that my body can perform miracles of biology that most can only dream of and put in their fantasy books either. Kinda like how I wanted no one to know the kind of magic I was capable of.

Standing up on my hindlegs, I pulled out my second pistol with my other hoof and emptied both of them on her. I flipped the chambers open and ejected the casings, then used my magic to rapidly snap six more bullets into each of them. Her shield held up against eight of those bullets, but the last two found purchase in her wither and the right side of her chest. I saw blood sputter from her muzzle as she cried out, then choked on a rush of blood surging out of her perforated lung.

Yet, just like the wounds on her foreleg, they both began to close up. It only took around nine seconds for the wounds to completely disappear, and her briefly troubled breathing became normal once again. Hiding behind her renewed barrier, she reached up to wipe the blood from her muzzle, though some of it still clung to the fur around her lips.

"That's a nifty trick you've got!" I called out to her.

"Those are some interesting toys you have," I heard her say through one of the constructs to my left. "Ultimately useless, but interesting."

I immediately turned to aim one of my pistols at the construct's head, pulling the trigger and making his cranium explode into a burst of smoky magic. I took the chance to briefly look back at the girls to be sure they were alright, and with all of the constructs either completely disoriented or completely inactive on the floor, they didn't even have to fight anymore. They were just mopping up the mess at this point.

My attention shifted back to Nightmare Moon immediately. I couldn't afford to let my guard down, and even now, after taking four shots, she didn't seem to be even remotely fazed by any of this. Well, until she stood up and tried to step down on her right foreleg. She attempted to hide it, but I saw her wince. My bet was that one of those two bullets wound up embedded somewhere that made it painful if not very difficult to walk on that leg. I was aiming for her knee, after all.

"Yeah you say that, but you're the one that's putting on a tough act, Princess."

"Says the cripple relying on weapons to fight a Goddess rather than her own power," she said dismissively. "You're a child playing at being a hero. Like a filly tying a wooden blade to their foreleg with a section of rope and pretending they're a guard worthy of protecting royalty!"

"Perhaps," I said, flipping the chamber on the gun in my left hoof open to remove the single spent shell casing, sliding a bullet in to replace it. "But then again, I was holding back. I needed to confirm a few things before I went all-out on you. For example, how likely would it be for you to survive a gunshot? Survey now says, very likely! Now all I need to do is get one of them between your eyes."

"Oh yes, the measured words and mind games. You truly are my sister's pupil. I will enjoy twisting you to my whims, little pony," she said, a soft sigh escaping her. "But for now, I tire of entertaining your delusions of superiority. Put down your weapons and surrender to me."

"Eeehh, no. I'm pretty sure I've got a Model 29 here that wants to get intimately familiar with the internal contents of your cranium."

I lowered down to all fours once more and used my magic to hold my pistols instead, my revolver still firmly secured in the holster at my hip. I didn't know if she was aware of it or not just yet, but it was going to be my final big surprise for her. Following the next one anyways.

It started out as a thrum of magic that made the air tingle around me. I dug deep, like the day I took the exam to join Celestia's School for Gifted Unicorns, and pulled that massive reserve of magical power to the surface. I felt it rush through me like fire in my veins, and for a brief moment I thought I would lose control. I focused on my breathing and contained it long enough to adjust to the sudden rush of mana, and ever-so-slowly, I felt things coming back into focus around me.

Pinkie and the others were at my sides, but I pushed them back with my magic, slowly shaking my head. "You all need to stay out of this," I said quietly, looking around at the five of them. "For now."

"Indeed."

Nightmare Moon seemed surprised by the sudden rush of mana that had practically charged the air with magic, but it definitely didn't intimidate her. Instead, her horn lit, and her eyes clenched along with her teeth. I watched as four holes were ripped into her skin as she pulled the fragmented bullets out of her body and tossed them aside, the wounds slowly closing up shortly after. She barely even cringed at the pain.

"It would be a shame to murder potential slaves to serve me in the coming years," I heard her mutter, her eyes wandering down to the stone orbs that laid at her hooves. "Now, before these decide to become a problem..."

I saw her raise up onto her hindlegs, her forelegs brought together in an obvious stomping form. I wasn't entirely sure what she was planning to do, but given those five orbs were very close to her, I could only assume she intended to destroy them, one at a time if need be. As far as I knew, if even one of them was missing or destroyed or whatever, none of them would work.

I immediately moved my revolver forward and fired until the bullets ran out, then alternated firing my pistols while reloading my revolver. It had the desired effect, and she faltered as high-velocity projectiles slammed into her barrier hard enough to make her head spin. I'd been on the receiving end of that sort of thing before, it was what led to me researching more effective methods of defending myself against bullets. You know, aside from ducking behind cover, something I significantly lacked near where I was standing.

There were many forms of combat that I found myself talented in. Hoof-to-hoof combat, ground-to-air combat...but many guards knew that along with my unnatural magical strength, I was a very creative mage. Aside from using my pistols and relying on my repertoire of offensive and defensive spells, I often found plenty of things in my environment to put to use.

At that moment, my thoughts returned to the potential frailty of the structure above our heads, and the embedded pillars in the walls. They looked loose enough....

I reached up to the ceiling and caressed the stones. The structure was sound enough, but I had been right; a single concussive impact in the room could've brought all of it crumbling down on top of us. That wasn't a guarantee, but it was a significant enough risk that I was glad I'd made the safer call.

Let it be known that I am not afraid to fight dirty, or primitively. That includes throwing stones, or in this case, thousand-year-old bricks.

I poured my magic over the ceiling and pulled down hard, and a resounding cracking sound from the ceiling heralded moonlight pouring into the spacious room. Cradling the falling debris in my magic, I felt my horn reaching the output of a double corona to bear the immense weight I was holding up in the air. I brought the bricks close together and formed several lines with them, sending them directly at Nightmare Moon, attacking her from the sides and directly at her front.

I think she was surprised by the sudden level of resistance I was putting up. Then again I'd kept exactly what I was capable of hidden from her all the way to this castle, so perhaps it just shocked her to see me treating her as a genuine threat. She certainly wasn't treating me like one at the time.

Her third barrier seemed far more sturdy than her previous two. I guess she was more afraid of big, thick chunks of processed rock than little metal projectiles. Either way, I needed to get her off that pedestal and away from those Elements long enough to grab them, but she looked like she was fully intent on staying right where she was. I holstered my guns and readied myself for what I had in mind.

I reached for one of the stone pillars next and pulled as hard as I could without risking all of the numerous bricks I had floating around me like a makeshift shield. The resounding crackle of stone slowly giving way filled the room, and I quickly threw all of the bricks at her at once. A massive cloud of stone rocketed towards her, and her barrier easily absorbed the impacts, many of them crumbling to dust from the sheer force I'd put behind them. The wall behind her caved thanks to the projectiles as well, kicking up even more dust as it fell away.

Perfect.

Without missing a beat, I pulled the pillar down and struggled to hold the massive weight in my magic as it toppled over, but once I had it horizontal to the ground, I heaved it back and swung it around, aiming directly for where Nightmare Moon was standing. There was a brief moment of bellowing impact against her barrier, followed by an almost glass-like shattering that gave way to a garbled, crushed scream.

I continued to swing the pillar around like a bat until I saw Nightmare Moon go flying off to my left, sailing through the air in a smashed mess out of the crumbled opening in the wall. Once I saw that, I tossed the pillar aside with a heavy, loud thud while reaching out for the Elements and pulling them over to us.

I glanced back at those five mares as they gathered around behind me, looking at the Elements with some alarm. A quick inspection showed that they were all fine, for the time being, and the constructs were completely gone. I looked up at the opening in the wall to see if she was back yet, then refocused myself on the Elements, trying to recall what I'd read.

A spark will cause the sixth Element to appear. That was what some of the books I'd read said about the Elements during my research. What did that mean? I didn't really have enough time to think about it at the moment, and all the time I'd spent thinking about it while doing my research hadn't gotten me any closer to a legitimate answer, so what chance did I have right now? Why would anyone write something so vague in a research book?!

Truth be told, I was panicking just a little bit. Her ability to regenerate, while anticipated, made this situation infinitely worse. Unless her getting whacked by that stone pillar somehow made it possible for Celestia to break free from her imprisonment, I didn't have any other way to really stop Nightmare Moon besides putting the Elements of Harmony to use against her.

Unable to think of any other ideas, I began to focus my eyes on the Elements in front of me more, slowly sifting through the layers of magic until I found a small, almost inconsequential hole in each of them, shining brighter than the rainbow-like array that surrounded each of them. Yet, despite how subdued that array looked...there was an undeniable glow of power inside of it. I just couldn't make it out clearly enough.

Suddenly, trying to use these things scared me. That kind of power coursing through me from all of these at once...that was a terrifying thought. Would it cause a cascade failure in my body? That's the stuff of nightmares for most unicorns.

"Get back! I don't know what's going to happen!" I shouted back at the others.

To their credit, the situation seemed to get serious enough that they'd continued to do as I told them. I at least expected Rainbow Dash to charge in like an idiot by now to help me out. Maybe it was the flurry of stones and a giant pillar smashing Nightmare Moon like a mallet to a watermelon that convinced her to stay away.

With some distance between myself and them, I reached out with my magic and began to carefully push energy into those openings in the arrays. It was actually difficult to mold to exactly how I needed my magic to be, though in hindsight that should've been setting off alarms in my head.

Moments later the array gave out under the touch of my magic, and before I had a chance to react to it, all five of the Elements merged a burst of magic together and shot it straight into my chest hard enough to send me flying back, skidding across the floor.

The impact and skidding didn't hurt nearly as much as I would've expected, and I managed to avoid hitting the back of my head, much to my very, very brief delight. What I was more concerned about was the strange sensation of writhing magic in my chest. A single moment of panic enveloped me as the mental image of my body mutating into a mass of putrid flesh and bone hit me, but as I quickly confirmed, the amount of magic that was wriggling about in my torso was nowhere near the levels needed for a true cascade failure. If anything, it felt strangely alive...very unnatural.

Rarity and Fluttershy were right there helping me back to my hooves, and I quickly moved towards the Elements once more. I had to have done something wrong, I just needed more time to look at them to decipher what was really going on with those arrays! I was so dead-set on it, I almost didn't notice a certain tacky cloud of starry smoke charging directly for me.

It was only my quick reflexes that saved me from probably getting my head knocked clean off. She seemed to rise up partially out of the smoke, a forehoof swinging directly for my chin in an upward mark. I leaned back while pushing myself back up onto my hindlegs, the powerful vacuum of air following her swing almost feeling like a stinging sensation in and of itself. It only took me a second afterwards, but I teleported back away from her a few feet and lowered back down onto all fours again, ready to make a move if she came for me.

She didn't. Instead, while I was teleporting, she re-materialized completely within the circle we had both previously set the Elements out in, the left side of her face looking grotesquely smashed in. Teeth were missing and still falling out of her muzzle, only to hit the floor and crumble to dust before our eyes. Guess that pillar did quite a number on her, but she recovered so fast from it...!

New teeth rapidly replaced the ones that were pushed out by them as they grew in, and her jaw and skull quickly fully reformed themselves until she was back to her normal self. Her helmet was missing of course, likely crushed to the point of uselessness by the aforementioned blunt object I'd used on her.

If I'm being totally honest here? Nightmare Moon was sexy, and if she weren't my enemy, I'd have probably been asking her out for a few drinks and a nice dinner before taking her back to my place.

She became decidedly less sexy and more terrifying when she rose up onto her hindlegs and slammed her body weight down onto her forehooves, causing a magical shockwave that rocked the room and focused into the Elements, causing them to shatter before my very eyes. I felt my blood run cold as our one form of defense against her fell to pieces under the raw might she held within her hooves.

"Tell me, Twilight Sparkle," she muttered, smiling ever-so-slightly at me. "You are the student of my dear sister. Her protege. So I have a very important question for you," she said, the sickly-sweet tone of her voice pulling at the growing dread I felt inside. "Based on what you've discovered about me here tonight, what can you deduce regarding your chances of victory against me?"

Have you ever had a moment, a truly terrifying moment, when you realize that you done fucked up really bad? I've not experienced it much in my life, I tend to be meticulous when I plan things out, but considering the circumstances...yeah. Yeah, this was a 'oh sweet Celestia I have so fucked up' situation.

"What is the problem, little mare? Can't deal with the conclusion you're reaching?" Nightmare stated mockingly, those sharp teeth of hers on full display as she cracked a wide grin at us. "Is it perhaps the fact that nothing you could possibly do now could ever stop me?"

"I-I thought you were just being cocky...putting on a front!" I muttered, stepping back while keeping my horn lit.

"Mm, you were half-right. It is more accurate to say that I was acting. All I needed to do was lure you to the resting place of the Elements," she said, taking a step towards us. "Just had to wait for you to pull them off of their ancient, magical stand...."

"We did the work for you just by removing them! You couldn't have moved them without us!"

"Yes, my sister seems to have enhanced her knowledge of wards in the thousand years I've been away," she muttered with a clear hint of irritation. "My magic slid right off, and they wouldn't budge when I attempted to remove them with my hooves."

"They were our only chance, because you-"

"Because I can outlast every single thing you could possibly throw at me, correct," she said, laughing quietly at me. "Hm-hmm, I came back desiring entertainment, and you presented it to me while giving me an easy solution to my one immense problem!" she said, slowly bowing her head to me, never turning her eyes away from my own. "Thank you so very much, foolish little pony."

I stumbled back just a bit and immediately reached for my guns again, pulling all three of them out and unloading on her. She recoiled and screamed until one of my revolver's bullets hit her in the head, popping out the back of her skull and sending brain matter spraying out. She didn't even try to defend herself. She didn't need to.

Her body crumpled to the floor the moment I ventilated her head, all three guns being popped open so I could rapidly reload them. I had plenty of ammo left for each, but...well, I knew it wouldn't last forever, unlike her.

Already, the wounds I'd inflicted on her were beginning to close. Even her broken horn, snapped apart from my rain of bullets, quickly mended and even regrew itself before our eyes! The bits of her that splattered on the floor, including her blood, decayed rapidly into nothing but dust.

"You all need to leave. Now," I stated as firmly as I could, but even I couldn't hide the quiver in my voice. "Before she pulls herself back together!"

I hadn't been paying much attention to them since I began fighting Nightmare Moon, but once I turned to actually talk to all of them...well. They seemed horrified. I couldn't blame them. Seeing someone's head practically explode from a bullet to the face isn't the kind of image many can say they've seen in their lifetime. At least, not the vast majority.

Of course it might have had something to do with Nightmare Moon being unkillable no matter what I do to her as well, but hey. No big deal, right?

"What?! B-b-but why?!" Fluttershy stuttered.

"Because," I growled out through gritted teeth. "There's nothing any of you can do here and I think you'd all rather be running for your lives than fighting for them!"

"And leave you here?!" I heard Rainbow shout as she took to the air. "Fat chance!"

I wanted to argue with them, but I was too busy keeping my focus on the body standing up in front of me. That horn was fully formed, and while she didn't seem to have full control over her body just yet, her head was still kinda...a little open in the front and back I think, her magic seemed to be plenty within her grasp.

I could see it before I felt it, and I think Rarity saw it too, untrained as she was. She wasn't exactly trying to hide it from us. She was reaching out to me, going straight for the guns held in my magic. If I hadn't seen it coming, she would've snatched them away without a struggle.

Oh, how I fought to keep them under my control.

You have to understand that clashing magic isn't all about pouring more power into the spell, be it your innate telekinesis or something more complex that's maintained by an array. While using telekinesis may lack the necessity of an array, it's about as natural to us unicorns as a griffon reaching out to pick a bit up off the ground, our ability to use it is still dependent on our ability to maintain a balance between focus and pouring our reserves of magic into the spell. Too much power, you lose control. Too little, and the spell will just fall apart.

It's the kind of thing you need to work at, which is exactly why I wasn't raining lightning bolts all over that sumbitch while we retreated. She had thousands of years of training and practice over me. The best I've got is...what, less than ten years having mock-magic duels with the Royal Guards? I had the power to match her, maybe even outstrip her own at the time. I did not have the kind of focus she had.

That being said, what she was doing was introducing her own magic to the hold over my guns. That caused an imbalance that instantly made it way harder for me to keep hold of them. I tried to pull them away from her grip, and she pulled back, pouring more magic into it. Our horns grew brighter and brighter during the ensuing struggle, until I reached a double-corona around my horn. She only seemed slightly bothered, and that was probably from my persistence, not because I was causing her any kind of magical strain.

I am a strong unicorn though, innately so. There is very little I can't manage with enough perseverence and practice, be it coming up with new spells and variants of old spells, or wrestling an ancient Goddess's magic with my own. I kept up with her just barely, and I perhaps would've been able to hold it together long enough to pull the triggers if it weren't for the fact that my guns weren't designed to survive that kind of magical pressure.

Funny thing about magic...pour too much of it into one location, and funky shit starts to happen in the effected area. Tomatoes turning into tomato-flavored grapefruits, frogs turning into oranges, you get the idea. This particular scenario was causing immense pressure to crush my guns from all sides, making the metal dent and then warp and twist until my guns began to resemble pretzels instead of tools of long-range destruction. The wood rapidly splintered in the grips before shattering completely, being crushed into the busted-up metal grooves.

I briefly wondered if that was her intent when she first reached for them.

When the pressure began to warp the chambers, the hammer of my revolver snapped forward and caused a bullet to fire off. My concentration was broken as the bent and gnarled barrel left nowhere for the bullet to go, causing the gun to backfire and burst open in a small blast of shrapnel that I felt whiz through the fur on the left side of my neck. Just an inch closer and I'd probably be dead from having hot metal embedded in my jugular.

My reaction was slow as she glanced at the mangled weapons before tossing them aside. Your head tends to be a little fuzzy and your thoughts a little slower once you're done with a big clash like that. I'd never wrestled magic with someone of that caliber before. It was intimidating, yet exciting!

She stepped towards me, and I quickly pulled together an array around my horn. I poured my magic through it, and a thick cone of flame consumed her completely. I couldn't see her through the fire until she moved, darting off to my left, the burnt fur on the front of her body already regrowing the moment she got away from the flames.

She had raised up, a foreleg pulled back, prepared to knock me clean off my hooves. I barely had time to undo the array I'd weaved around my horn in time to throw up a makeshift barrier. It was a basic defense at best, and I already knew what it felt like to have an earth pony bashing at my shields. Needless to say, I knew immediately that this was going to hurt.

I could have teleported. It crossed my mind for the briefest of instants. But if I'd teleported, I would've left them all there, next to her, defenseless. My family's bloodline tends to have a strong innate skill with shields, thus we tend to lean towards relying on them. That was probably a good thing in this situation, for their sakes.

The moment her hoof slammed down on my barrier, I screamed and my vision went white. It felt like that impact had reverberated through my entire body, rattling my bones and making me feel faint. I didn't know what was happening in that moment. The world was muffled, indecipherable and my thoughts were a jumbled mess. I'd experienced the pain of overwhelming backlash through training with the guard, and the only way to recover from it faster was to focus on your breathing and take deep, steadying breaths.

"..Dr-p...sh-ld...re."

You know it's one thing to be so rattled and fucked up that you can't hear what anyone's saying...but you know you got wrecked if you're only picking up bits and pieces. Straight-up punch-drunk, and I technically didn't actually get punched! Seriously, my head took the brunt of what that night had to offer, and not in a good way.

Against all odds, some part of me had managed to keep my barrier up, but there were cracks on it where her hoof was still pressing against it. Worse yet, even as I tried to push back, she didn't so much as budge. There was something off about the touch of her hoof. I know that earth ponies are strong, but that hit was...wow. Excessive would be a good word for it.

"I believe I gave you an order, Twilight Sparkle," I barely heard her say. "Drop. Your. Shield."

Each word was punctuated by what looked like a gentle pat over my shield with the flat of her hoof, but I could feel the difference. There was magical pressure behind her mere touch, and with her just tapping at my shield, I could feel the pressure pushing me back.

I quickly constructed a secondary array to layer over my shield, the surface of it distorting Nightmare Moon's image as it began to oscillate and attempt to push her hoof away in a fairly violent matter. To her credit, she was only marginally surprised by the change, and it didn't impede her hardly at all.

If you're not actually hurt in a way that would impede you, adrenaline's really good at getting your head back in the game. In this instance, she actually made me fear for my life. Not a whole lot of ponies can say they've managed to make me feel that way. I take great solace in my ability to out-think the average street punk or hired Mafia goon. It is only when I've had to rely on my reflexes and my quick thinking that I've ever been legitimately afraid.

Nightmare Moon had me numbered from step one. She outmaneuvered me. I had nothing else to fall back on but my magic and my wits. You're damn right I was scared enough to have adrenaline flooding my veins.

I felt my hooves begin to skid against the floor as she began to push more insistently against my barrier, the oscillations doing nothing to push her hoof away, the scrape of magic against her armor-clad hooves sending sparks this way and that. She pushed, and I skidded back further. The girls jolted to keep pace with me as Nightmare Moon continued to push us back, further and further towards the other side of the room.

I was doing my best to try and plant my hooves more firmly, but that's kinda difficult to do on solid stone. Plus, having a bum hindleg makes it hard to stand your ground, for obvious reasons. I felt that strange, foreign magic stir in my chest again, a warming sensation that gave me a whole 'nother thing to worry about. Just what was that?! It felt so weird.

I remember thinking at that moment that if those mares hadn't been there with me, I could've drawn this out much longer. I could've put up a proper fight, led Nightmare Moon on a merry chase straight towards the Royal Guards that I assumed were approaching the old castle right that moment. If they weren't there, they'd be safe.

"Aw, dangit...c'mon, Rainbow! We gotta help 'er!"

I felt weight press against my right side, then on my left. Two forelegs looped over my withers, and helped push me forward. I felt our pace slow just a little, but the pressure on my horn increased. I had to pour more magic into the barrier to keep it functional, but even then, she was twisting her hoof and pushing harder on it. Tiny hairline cracks were forming that I scrambled to close up before they became a problem.

I didn't clearly hear what Fluttershy and Rarity said to each other, but soon they were crowding around my flanks, bracing me with their hooves and slowing us down even more. Pinkie was the last one, coming up directly behind me and putting all her weight against my backside, pinning my tail between her and my butt and bringing us to a complete halt.

In a very different circumstance, I would've loved to have mares crowding on me like this. That foreign magic inside me wriggled around more, and I felt warm. So very warm.

Us Apples, we pride ourselves on our family and our honesty.

Sometimes all it takes is a little kindness, Twilight.

I didn't know where these memories were coming from. They made no logical sense. I had no time to think about these things, but they were coming back to me like pieces of a puzzle perfectly fitting together in my mind.

-it usually happens because I always want to make ponies smile-

Why shouldn't I have been generous?

Rainbow Dash doesn't leave her friends hangin'!

Looking back on it, I really have to wonder if the Elements of Harmony just mind-controlled me to smack me upside the head and go 'duh, dumbass'. That foreign magic inside me spread through my whole body like some kind of weird arcane parasite. It was a pleasant heat that made me feel as if I were wrapped in a blanket...which was slightly accurate. More of a blanket of body heat.

It couldn't have been a coincidence. I mean I don't believe in destiny or anything, but they were all here, together, representing each of the Elements of Harmony, save for the hidden one. At least, their personalities seemed to represent them almost perfectly.

They had come out here to help me. Protect me, even. If I were being honest with myself, I probably wouldn't have made it here on my own. In doing so, they'd bared themselves to me through trials and tribulations, and I guess...huh.

Can't say I've ever had such pure, genuine friends before. They actually gave a shit about me.

I pushed as hard as I could with my magic, and to my surprise, Nightmare Moon stumbled back. She looked alarmed by something. It wasn't until she lunged forward and swung with far more gusto than she had previously that I knew something had changed in that moment. She saw something I didn't.

When her hoof came down on my shield, I felt that strange something. Specifically, I felt like I could take a hundred of those without batting an eye! More than that, there was an odd, rainbow-like sheen to my shield...I wasn't sure what to make of it until I started becoming more aware of that warmth congregating in my horn.

Something was there, and it was waiting for me to use it.

The fact that I had no idea what to do with this foreign magic gathering in my horn was inconsequential. Something about it was primal, basic, and all too willing to go along with my intent. I poured it into a simple array and fired a beam of raw magic at Nightmare Moon, through my barrier.

The instant it hit, she was sent sprawling back, and her voice distorted with a kind of duality to it that made her sound like two ponies at once. The power behind it was mystifying to me. How could there be that much power sustaining itself in such a basic array?

It felt like my magic. It functioned just the same, but there was something inherently different about it. It was too familiar to me. I found myself wondering if it was always there...then I looked up at my horn.

From the tip of my horn, five differently-colored strands reached out to those five mares surrounding me, and it only took a split-second for me to understand.

"We're the Elements of Harmony."

I didn't realize I'd blurted it out until they all looked over at me, then down to their chests, where those strands of light were leading to. All at once, the broken stone shards of what we thought were the Elements previously pulled themselves together, and emitted different lights, the same colors of the strands connecting me to the others.

They weren't rocks anymore. They were jewels. Large, beautiful, pulsating gems of power that rocketed towards us and clean through my shield, as if I'd designed it just to let them past. They crashed into each of the mares from various angles, and those strands connecting us grew brighter and brighter, and I felt so warm all over that I almost wanted to giggle despite our situation.

I had no idea what was going on anymore. I saw them all get lifted into the air, the raw magical power pouring into the room feeling like the most comforting bliss I'd ever experienced...which was probably true. I felt myself leaving the ground as well, and yet, I also felt completely safe in that moment. Things seemed like they were out of my control, and I didn't care.

I could feel all of them, and they could all feel me. I don't know how else to describe it. For a brief instant, I understood them. I understood their naive desire to follow me and protect me, despite how much stronger I am than each of them combined.

That's what friends do. They care.

Words weren't necessary in that moment. We gazed down upon Nightmare Moon as one, and the raw fear I saw in her eyes in that instant...somehow, it felt heartbreaking. Then she fired upon us, her magic smashing into an unseen shield guarding all of us. I didn't know what it was coming from, but it wasn't coming from my horn. It was coming from inside of us.

"NO!!" I heard her scream at us, that strange dichotomy to her voice lingering. "Not again! Never again!!"

Blast after blast of magic came at us, but they all harmlessly dissipated against that invisible shield. I should have been alarmed by how hard she was trying to hit us, but I just felt...relaxed. Like I knew everything was going to be okay. Perhaps that was their influence? I couldn't tell you.

There was panic in her eyes as that strange magic encompassing us gathered around us. Nothing she was doing was stopping us. Her eyes went wide and she turned to run, but it was too late. She was a threat. Dangerous to everyone around her. We had no choice but to stop her.

The massive rainbow that swirled around us, then lashed out straight at her, struck like a snake. She had only made it a few steps before she was consumed, screaming in fear as a tornado of color wrapped around her.

Then I felt her. We all did.

She was desperate to never go back. I was drawn to my thoughts before her appearance. I couldn't imagine being isolated from everyone, everything, in the silent vacuum of space for over a thousand years. A normal pony would've gone mad. We're social creatures, just the same as the other sapient races of the world. We need others involved in our lives. Our mental health depends on it.

They reached out to help her. I hesitated. I can be merciful if I so choose, but I have my limits. She tried to kill us. I tried to understand them, and I felt their kindness, their generosity. They wanted to help her. Not help her take over Equestria of course, but they wanted to help her without sending her back. They reached out to me for guidance. I had no idea how to solve that kind of conundrum.

The Elements knew, however. They reached out to Nightmare Moon independent of us, and...well, I don't know how else to describe what happened next. It was like it...tore her in two. That was all I could make of it. Next thing I knew it was over, and the magic faded as quickly as it came. We all floated back down to the floor, and I collapsed.

Things were fuzzy for a few minutes, but when I got my head on straight, they were crowded around me, and a small mare, barely smaller than a teenage filly, laid on the floor, unconscious.

...And there was Celestia, standing between us and her.

Author's Note

Whew! Finally almost done with this arc!

I've actually been looking forward to finishing this arc because I've been chomping at the bit to get to writing the stuff that happens next. Specifically, Mafia stuff.

Music that I listened to this chapter? Two different ones, for the most part!

Aaand also...this one!

Chapter 10 - Eternal Night (Epilogue)

written by Fire Soul

I coughed a few times and tried to inhale, but I could smell nothing but copper. I reached up and dabbed at my snout, and found that there was a somewhat alarming amount of blood there. I shouldn't have been surprised, in all honesty. That was a lot of magical strain I'd put myself through. Getting a nosebleed from that was actually rather tame compared to some of the other symptoms I could be experiencing...

Like the heavy headache that was making my skull throb, now that I was calming down and the adrenaline was leaving my system. Oh sweet Celestia my head hurt!

I felt the others reaching to help me get to my hooves. What had happened while I was out on break? I slowly felt myself rising to my hooves, and that was when I felt a weight on my head that wasn't there before. I initially attributed it to the heavy, painful throbbing that was going on up there, but a single glance to my left made me spot the necklace Rarity was wearing.

I reached up and removed whatever it was on my head and found...a tiara. Oh, lovely. I calmly put it back on, feeling revolted the entire time. I don't have anything against more girly things, but I'm just...y'know? I look good in stallion's clothes! It clashed so hard I was feeling self-conscious with it on.

Then again the jewel in the middle was shaped and colored like my cutie mark, soooo...eh. Ya win some, ya lose some.

"Princess Luna."

I turned my attention to the Princesses in front of us, the others maintaining their silence despite only now rousing me from unconsciousness. Celestia stepped forward slowly with her wings spread as Princess...well, I didn't know her name at the time, but c'mon, if you don't know who Princess Luna is by now, you need to crawl out from under your rock, shit shower and shave, and go get a life.

Anyways, I saw Luna's eyes shoot open suddenly, the gasping breath she took indicative of her fear in that moment. To be fair I wasn't entirely sure what was going on with her at the time. I wasn't aware that Celestia's sister wasn't named Nightmare Moon, so mostly I was just really confused by the change in appearance. I didn't know jack-shit back then, on reflection.

"It has been a thousand years since I've seen you like this..." I heard Celestia say as she knelt down in front of the much smaller alicorn. "I have missed you so much, little sister."

For how warm and kind Celestia seemed to be, the fact that she was still wearing her benevolent ruler mask said a lot. She wanted to bare herself to her sister, but she was cautious. Unsure. How could she predict how Luna would react to her presence?

"W-we are sorry...!" I heard Luna meekly mutter.

Celestia stood up once again and gazed upon her younger sister, cowering before her, and she smiled a more genuine smile, as far as I could tell. There was an established amount of smirk to her normal, benevolent 'I wouldn't hurt a fly' expression she usually wore when dealing with the nobility. Those with more experience like myself know that that mask actually means 'fuck with me and I will end you without taking your life', but y'know. Those two interpretations are basically the same, one just has more sinister connotations.

"I know, sister. I know," I heard Celestia mutter in response. "Let us put our differences aside. We were meant to rule together, little sister!"

I watched my mentor hold a hoof out to her, taking a gentle step back to put some distance between them. Even after a thousand years, proper etiquette took precedence I suppose. Or Celestia was doing it on reflex, either-or. She did that with me too, the few times we've ever hugged.

"Will you accept my apology? I let you down, all those years ago..."

"Nay! T'was us who let thee down!" Luna whimpered, looking up to Celestia with tears brimming in her eyes. "We beg thy forgiveness, big sister...!"

I tried not to spoil the moment with my groans of pain, but my headache was getting really bad. I caught my voice in my throat and just cringed as my temples throbbed and the front of my skull right under my horn felt like something was trying to claw its way out. The others seemed concerned by how I was swaying on my hooves, and truth be told, I felt pretty woozy as well.

I swayed in place for a moment before gathering my wits and stabilizing myself enough to see straighter. Slowly I stepped forward, and promptly stopped because the world began to spin once I made a single move forward. Luna noticed in the midst of her sudden embrace with Celestia. She really was tiny in comparison to Celestia, and cute in a demure kind of way.

"She should not be awake!"

I jolted a little as she broke away and moved over towards me. There was confidence in her movements for only a brief moment before she became more meek, and more cautious as she approached me. I just kept my gaze locked on her as best I could, frowning a little.

"Why...are you smaller now? Aren't you Nightmare Moon?" I asked shakily, taking a few deep breaths to steady myself more. "Do I still need to kick your ass, or is Celestia gonna do it...?"

"Still aware and conscious...thou has a strong mind, Twilight Sparkle," I heard her mumble. "Thou must lay down and sleep. Take time to recover from thy strain."

"Celestia called you Luna, so...not Nightmare Moon?" I mumbled, the world around me sounding as if I were underwater.

She cracked a weak smile at me. "No and yes, young warrior."

"'Kay then."

I didn't even hesitate, didn't give a fuck that Celestia was right there watching. I reared back and punched her square in the snout. I almost fell over in the process, but I managed to catch myself just in time to maintain some level of dignity. If I'd been a bit more conscious, I would've enjoyed her shrieking and stumbling back as her nose cracked way more than I did at the time.

"That was for-" I tried to say, but I had to pause to swallow. Felt like I was going to drool. "That was for...for threatenin' my son...."

That was the last thing I heard before things got fuzzy. My memory of everything from that moment on is just kinda fragmented. I recall being on Celestia's back, and feeling the wind rushing through my mane, aaand then I woke up in a hospital bed. No IVs attached to me or anything, I was just laying there with-OH, right, there was a magic inhibitor attached to my horn. I reached up to touch it with my hoof and found that it didn't have the shape or density needed to be military-grade, so at least I knew I wasn't some kind of high-risk case. It was just a standard one used with low-key criminals and medicine.

What I noticed immediately after that, however, struck me with panic: my clothes were gone.

All the way down to my underwear, everything was bared to the world. Now let's make something absolutely clear, I am not a prude. I just have a particular aversion to being naked in public, and...well okay, often times in private too, unless it's my bedroom and I know for sure that no one can get a look at my goods without me knowing. I mean maybe there's some lingering phobias or whatever from that, but...guh, whatever! Doesn't matter! Point is I'm perfectly fine!

Anyways, like I was saying, not a prude. Perfectly fine. I was just panicking because who knew how many of the hospital's staff saw my cock and balls when they were expecting a mare, y'know? I can't have them spreading false rumors about me, however true they may actually be. That just couldn't be allowed.

"Oh! Doctor, she's awake!" I heard someone call out at the doorway to my room.

It was almost reflexive, how I pulled the bedsheets further up my body. I felt far too uncomfortable like that, and judging by how my fur smelled, I'd been washed by someone. I glanced over to the doorway and immediately set to memorizing the nurse's face, for future reference. I'd need to meet with the doctor as well. I could wipe their minds, but that would raise a lot of questions. Signed paperwork, medical records...damn. Bribes, in that case.

As soon as the nurse left, I looked around for my clothes. I spotted a black suit folded up one the table next to my bed. No flowers or anything, just a suit. Wait...black? But I was wearing a blue suit....

"Thank you, nurse," I heard an all-too-familiar voice say just around the corner outside the door. "But the doctor already gave her the all-clear. I've just been waiting for her to wake up."

"Oh! I, er, I wasn't aware, your majesty!"

A quiet giggle. "It's quite alright, nurse Redheart. Now, I must speak with my student."

"Of course, Princess!"

Calmly, Celestia walked into my room, almost making a point of not looking at me. It was only when she closed the door behind herself that she spoke up. Something was off. Her smile was gone now that we were alone.

"Before you ask, I've already secured your secrecy," she said to me, walking over to my bedside. "None but the doctor and nurse saw your true gender, and once I spoke with both of them, they were very willing to do as I said. As far as your medical records here show, you're still just a lady."

I sighed with relief. "Guess that means I can come here for my doctor's visits if I need to."

"Mmm," she hummed, sitting down and looking me over for a moment. I couldn't help but feel self-conscious. "That's not what I'm here about though."

"I figured..." I muttered, laying my head back on my pillow. "What're you here for then?"

"Why did you shoot to kill?"

"I fired at her leg first to confirm she had the same regenerative properties you did."

"You had no way of knowing an organ as complicated as her brain would survive the same kind of trauma."

"I had to take a risk with her life-"

A firm stomp of a hoof and the crackle of splintering wood sounded almost deafening in the otherwise very quiet room, though the quaking that Celestia caused wasn't so unnoticeable. Even then it was clearly a measured and restrained action on her part. If she'd been stomping with all her strength, she probably could've made the floor shatter into pieces beneath us.

"She is my sister!"

I'd never heard Celestia yell before. Not legitimately anyways. She's yelled at Blueblood, and other prissy, I-deserve-more-than-everyone-else nobles and business owners that refuse to see reason, but that's more of a yelling borne of wanting to teach them a lesson. This yelling was more genuine. There wasn't a purpose behind it. She was actually angry.

I trembled a little in my bed. Still...I know that I was justified in my actions. Anyone would be.

"Yes, she is. She also left me no choice in the matter," I muttered quietly. "It was her, or the world."

"I know," I heard Celestia say, clenching her teeth. "I am all too aware of the choice you had to make. Still...it's my sister...!"

"She tried to kill you," I reasoned, looking over to my mentor nervously. "She tried to kill everyone."

"...Twilight. I have been alive for such a long time. We both have," she said, hanging her head slowly. "Through all of these years, she has always been there. Either by my side, or far away, sealed in the moon. I waited a thousand years for her to come back, and the idea of losing her again....!"

I saw her wings flutter in agitation, her entire body trembling for a single instant of emotional weakness before she pulled herself back together. I was seeing a lot of things from her for the first time, I guess.

"Did you even hesitate?" she asked me, meeting my gaze.

"...No," I said, fidgeting a little. "She was threatening the world, my friends, Spike...you," I said, giggling to myself. "The messed up part of all this is, I knew you'd be upset if I killed your sister. But I also thought you'd understand if I had to to get you back."

"You misunderstand," she said, glancing over to the doorway where a few ponies were listening in. She yanked the door open to reveal two male nurses peeking in from the edge of the door's window. "It is rude to eavesdrop on your Princess!"

You can bet they were down the hallway and gone before she even had a chance to slam the door shut again.

Her attention returned to me. "It isn't that I disapprove of your actions, Twilight. You have saved Equestria, and probably the entire world. But...it was your intent."

"I'm, uh...wait, I'm lost now."

She looked away from me and shook her head. "You intended to kill her if no other option was available to you. You gambled with her life, and she agrees, you didn't hesitate."

She was looking at me, searching my eyes for something. I didn't like where this conversation was going at all. There was tension in the air, and my unwillingness to speak, and inability to, was only contributing to it. I didn't know what to say to her.

"I have seen many bloody battles and violent wars, and I have seen into the eyes of many a soldier," she said to me, staring into my eyes. I swear she was looking straight through me. "Every single one of them, to some extent, has hesitated to take a life."

I leaned away from her and broke eye contact. This was going to a bad place. A very, very bad place.

"How many?" I heard her mumble.

I didn't answer. I couldn't answer. I needed a way out, but I had nothing!

"How many-" she said, raising her voice at me. "-have you killed, Twilight?"

There are very few ponies that can make me clam up like this. I felt trapped, like I needed to run, but I knew if I did, she'd just hunt me down. Probably with the Royal Guard. I was shaking where I laid, and I couldn't bring myself to meet her accusing glare.

She just sat there, waiting for a response. Her presence alone was enough to unnerve me, but the way she just sat there and stared at me...I don't know. The words just came tumbling out, but they were calculated. I couldn't tell her everything.

"I got in some trouble with the wrong ponies during my travels. I had to do some things I'm not proud of," I said slowly. "But I got used to doing them."

"How many?"

"I don't know."

"Did you kill innocent ponies?"

"Not if I could help it. I went out of my way to avoid civilian casualties."

"Then who did you kill?!"

"I did work for the Mafia," I said, forcing myself to glare at her in turn. "Take a guess."

We stared at each other for what felt like a long time. A silent battle of wills, clashing between the two of us. I figured I'd be the first to relent. Turned out, it was her, much to my surprise. She didn't back down immediately, however.

"Are you a threat to my subjects?" she asked, her voice firm.

I snorted at that and shook my head. "I swear upon my bloodline that I'm not a threat to your innocent subjects."

She looked away from me finally, and I could see a definitive change in her posture. She seemed...disappointed. Crestfallen, if you will. But given how heated things had been mere seconds prior, I didn't really feel sorry for her.

"It would seem that despite these past few years with you, I don't truly know you at all."

Ah. There it was. A perfect chance!

"I would've preferred no one ever got to know me that well," I muttered, slipping out of bed and going over to grab my clothes. "I left all that behind me. I want it to stay in the past, and that's final."

"I see...I apologize," she said, making an effort to look away. She understood my issues with nudity. "But Twilight...you consider me a friend, yes?"

I sighed at that as I slipped into my undershirt while pulling my underwear up. "Of course, Celestia. Kinda hard to say I don't when I talk to you on a first-name basis."

She was conspicuously quiet as I finished getting dressed, my hooves gently adjusting my clothes until I felt secure once more. Only then did I hear her hooves clopping against the floor, and her hoof resting on my wither. I turned to look up at her, and she was smiling at me. Not her false, benevolent mask smile. Just a small, strained smile. I could tell she felt bad, but I also couldn't fault her for any of it either. Needless to say, things were a little awkward between us.

Not to mention, I had some things to say to her as well.

"Then please remember that you can always talk to me. If you ever wish to open up about it...I will be ready and willing to listen." she told me.

I would've smiled back at her, but I had some issues of my own to clear up. I turned around to face her better, while a hoof idly checked my pockets for my cigar case. Not like I could smoke inside a hospital anyways, but still, I prefer to keep a few of those things on me.

"Maybe one day. In any case...what about you?" I asked. "I refuse to believe that all six of the Elements of Harmony showing up in the same town on the night of your sister's return is merely a coincidence."

She at least had the courtesy to look nervous from my question, but in comparison to what she just hit me with, this wasn't exactly a bombshell of a revelation.

"How long did you know that I was one of the Elements of Harmony?" I asked calmly, silently wishing I still had at least one of my cigars.

She was silent for a moment, but eventually she spoke up. "From the day I found you in that testing room."

"Ah. So you've been grooming me to take on your sister since then," I deduced, shaking my head. "And you didn't feel the need to tell me anything?"

"You're a smart mare," she said, turning to walk towards the door. "You figured it out, as I knew you were capable of."

"I wonder what else you aren't telling me?"

"Excuse you?" she said slowly, looking back at me.

"All I'm saying is, what reasons do I have to trust you from this point on? You manipulated me, kept things from me...you didn't trust me, and you went behind my back because of it," I said, shrugging and turning to look out of the window on the opposite side of the room. "You put everything at risk."

I took her contemplative silence as permission to continue. She certainly wasn't going to say anything.

"Let me be very clear about something your majesty," I said, turning and marching right up to her. "I don't like being used. You warn me before I go balls-deep in a bear trap next time. Now why didn't you tell me?!"

Yeah, she was upset. Pretty obvious really, she wasn't trying to hide it at all. She was using the same breathing technique she'd taught Cadance, the same one Cadance had taught me, taking slow breaths in and out to steady her nerves. This conversation was becoming as upsetting for her as it already was for me.

"Friendship is key to the use of the Elements of Harmony. Friendship is also something you can't force. If I had told you what you were, and where the other five were located, you would have tried to force it. I know you well enough for that."

"A genuine, meaningful connection..." I muttered, nodding a little. "I'd call bullshit on that, but considering I was ground-zero for that whole event and I still have no clue how any of that worked, I guess I have to take your word for it."

The silence that reared its ugly head once more was grueling. Things had gone from tense to feeling extremely awkward now, and I wasn't really sure what to do next. We were just standing there!

Eventually, she bowed her head. "In my fear and anger I forced you to speak on something you wished to forget. Even worse, I accused you of being less than the pony you have proven to be since the day I met you. For that, I must apologize to you, my faithful student."

"Apology accepted. That's a whole lot better than most ponies would get from me," I teased, giggling to myself. "For what it's worth, I'm sorry too. I wish I were a better pony, but I'm not, and no, don't argue with me on that."

She chuckled bemusedly at me, but she didn't say anything otherwise. Instead, she rested a hoof on my wither, giving me a brief nod. We both left the hospital without incident, and it was only when we got outside that something occurred to me.

"So wait, two things. One, what happened to me to make me pass out?" I asked, tilting my head. "Two, where's that ugly tiara that probably looked really stupid on me?"

"Acute magical strain, for the first question," she explained as we walked along, the bowing of those that she passed going...well, mostly ignored. She was used to this sort of thing. I, however, wasn't used to the whoops and hollers and ponies cheering my name. "When my sister hit your shield that last time during your battle, you strained yourself to the point of rupturing your mana gland. Channeling the Elements likely exacerbated the symptoms."

"Ah. And the second question?"

"They are under guard at Town Hall. I will be escorting them to Canterlot personally, after today."

"Huh. Well, okay. Now then," I said, clearing my throat. "It's just occurred to me, buuuut I'm missing the weapon I borrowed from one of the guards that escorted me to Ponyville in the first place. Freewind, I believe his name was. Any idea where it went?"

If you think I'm being remarkably calm after what happened, that's because I'm pretty damn good at lying, both with my words and with my body. I was in knots on the inside, because I could already see her prying and looking into my background with a sharper eye. I got the feeling she was going to do that the moment she got back to Canterlot.

How convenient for me that I'd gone through the trouble to 'clean up' after myself. Took me a couple years, but I doctored a whoooole lot of records. Good luck finding that paperwork Celestia! I wasn't stupid enough to leave records and documents about my activities laying around anywhere. The only one that might have paperwork would be the Magister himself...and I doubt he'd be willing to part with them for any reason. So where did my fear come from? Well, you can never be a hundred percent sure you've silenced everyone and cleaned up everything, know what I mean?

As we proceeded further into town, the whoops and hollers of ponies enjoying festivities became more pronounced, and the revelers more boisterous in their noise-making. Seated upon the royal chariot was Luna, watching the crowd go wild, a necklace of flowers around her neck. Not a lei, this isn't the Western Isles, so it's a Celestia-damned necklace of flowers.

The chariot was almost acting like an impromptu stage, and it gave Luna a perfect view of the festivities. Ponies tried to get her to join in, but she seemed afraid. Unsure. I couldn't blame her. Thousand years out of touch, how could you just dive back in like nothing's changed?

She did have my hoofblade though, so I was forced to converse with her. To say the least, things were...awkward. It's really strange to talk to someone you just fought like your life depended on it...which it did, I'll have you know.

She returned the weapon to me, and Celestia and I walked back to Town Hall, the hoofblade secured around my foreleg. It was improper to even have the weapon taken from me, but...well, Freewind didn't need to know about that little detail. Besides, there were caveats for medical care and the Princess herself. Well, themselves now. Someone's gonna need to get into those ancient books and un-whitewash them.

Oh, and in case you're wondering if Celestia took issue with me punching her sister square in the snoot, don't worry. She laughed about it, with Luna at that. Luna actually appreciated it down the line. She said I had 'an impressively fiery soul to be willing to punch a Goddess in the face because she was being a jerk'. I mean, obviously after she got more used to modern dialect.

I took a moment to examine the hoofblade before I bothered to return it. It would be improper to return it if it was loose, cracked, dirty or tarnished in any way. Fortunately, lacking any significant use after I borrowed it, the most it had was a few flecks of mud and dirt on the shield cover that hid the sheath of the blade. One quick wipe-down and the dirt was gone, though I had to scrape at some of it with my hoof. I would've gone for a proper polish, but with all the partying going on around me, finding some would take forever.

Celestia chose to stay with Luna, since she seemed to be getting progressively more and more uncomfortable with the festivities the longer she was left alone. I guess returning to civilization after a thousand years tends to make having a party right off the bat a bit overwhelming, but hey, she wanted ponies to accept her, so...!

The moment I entered Town Hall and the guards took notice of me, they all stood at attention and saluted me. I was reminded in that instant that I was technically a Royal Guard. One of them, however loose that status may be.

I quickly saluted them in return, before turning to the nearest guard. "I'm looking for Corporal Freewind. He entrusted me with his weapon, and I intend to return it to him."

"I am Stalwart Shield," I heard one of the pegasi say, his armor freshly polished. I couldn't recognize him due to the enchantments on his armor. "And I bore witness to your Conscription."

I quickly snapped to attention and saluted him. To tell the truth I wasn't sure what happened after this. I had a vague memory of it all, but outside of the initial ceremony of becoming a Conscript under these specific circumstances, I hadn't memorized it all that well. It was fortunate that Freewind heard me from where he was in one of the back rooms.

He walked with purpose, a kind of confidence that the Royal Guard always had to display. They were held to a particularly high standard, though many of the palace guards tended to be a bit more lax. It was to be expected, really. Nothing particularly bad ever happened within the castle usually, and when it did, there were plenty of ponies around to deal with the problem.

I somehow got the feeling his confidence wasn't just from his training. I mean, he conscripted me, and then I saved Equestria and the entire world. That tends to get you noticed. Not on my own of course, but...eh, details.

He approached without a word until we were face-to-face, only a short distance between us. He saluted me, and I returned the gesture before thinking back to this specific part of the ceremony. I genuinely wasn't sure of what was supposed to happen next, but I suppose it was on Freewind this time around.

"You return a hero, Conscript. Your methods, however, must be called into question." he said, every single guard in the room focused on us now.

Welp...here we go.

"I tried to talk them down."

"You took civilians into a dangerous situation that they had no business being involved in."

It was like a rapier battle between unicorns, when you think about it. I move in close with a thrust, he knocks it easily to one side and swept straight over my breast, scoring a hit on me with ease. I of course recovered quickly.

"Would you prefer I used force on civilians? They were foolish enough to follow after me even if I had managed to talk them into staying behind," I said, absently patting the spot over my pocket where I usually kept my cigars. Fuck, where were those things? "I had no intention of bringing them with me, but they forced my hoof on the matter. They were safer in my care, given the circumstances."

We had a brief staring contest before Stalwart chimed in...surprisingly in my favor. Kinda. "Reports about what happened are all over the place. When we interviewed the other Bearers, they said they followed her in after she told them not to," he said, looking me over suspiciously. "And you say you took them with you instead?"

"That is correct." I said, slowly nodding my head.

"Then you instructed them to lie."

It wasn't a question. That was a simple statement of fact, and I knew I wasn't worming my way around it. He had me on the defensive...so I needed to do something unusual to throw him off. Both of them, actually.

"That is also correct."

"Why?" Freewind asked, the barest rumble of anger in his voice.

I had to make this look and sound good. I stayed silent as my gaze drifted down towards the floor. A tiny twitch of my gaze this way and that, searchingly rummaging through my memories of that moment. I of course knew why I'd done it. Why put yourself on display as a reasonable, perfect creature when you can be fallible, prone to mistakes and making errors in judgment? Deception is a key part of my life as a noble.

I looked back up at both of them, frowning ever-so-slightly. "I made an error in judgment, and I regretted it shortly after. I contradicted what I told them to say because I wished to come clean," I muttered, lowering my head. "I beg your forgiveness."

Not my best delivery, but then, I wasn't trying to play it off to Fleur or Upper Crust. Then again Upper Crust is a complete moron, so she's not that difficult either. She just knows not to take me by my word alone.

These guards didn't learn that lesson.

"We forgive your lies, Conscript. After what you've done, it would be unforgivable if we chose not to overlook such a minor slight," Freewind said to me, extending his right foreleg to me. "Now, return my weapon and complete your service."

I bowed my head once and went to work removing his hoofblade from my foreleg. It would've been easy to do if I had access to my magic, but that inhibitor ring was there for two reasons: to encourage me not to use my magic, and to slowly bleed off my magic so I didn't leak mana into my brain through that rupture. It'd heal quickly on its own, but before these inhibitor rings were invented, this sort of injury could actually be lethal after a few days of exposure. Just imagine your brain slowly breaking down from mana poisoning, and you've got an idea.

I calmly undid the final latch on the hoofblade and removed it, stepping closer to Freewind while holding it in my hoof. I flipped it around and carefully attached it to his foreleg, the eyes of every guard in the room on us still. They should've been paying attention to their surroundings more, but this was the sort of thing that took precedence. Even the fact that the Elements of Harmony were secured in a case in the middle of the room didn't deter them. Guess it was a good thing I was in the proper position to keep an eye on them.

After that, the ceremony was finished with a simple salute and, as I expected, an attempt to recruit me. Shame Shiny wasn't there, I would've had a prime opportunity to embarrass him! I found out a little later when I left Town Hall that he was with Cadance in Cloudsdale, keeping the peace while things were getting sorted out.

My immediate concern after that was tracking down Spike, which didn't take very long. There was a bizarre sense of trust all through this community, small as it was compared to places like Canterlot and New Yoke. Everypony knew everypony in places like this, and with how myself and those five mares had saved the world, well...we were the talk of the town. It wasn't hard for someone to point out the location of my son.

He was laughing and having a great time chasing around a certain small filly that had used her tactical cuteness on me before all of this bullshit started. She was older than him, of that I had no doubt. I took a seat a short distance away and just watched the simple, innocent delights of two children playing a game of tag together. It wasn't something I got to see in the city unless I went to the park. Even then, other parents were always wary of Spike's sharp claws and teeth. Made it hard for him to find friends to play with, something I've always felt bad about.

I could've sat there forever, really. Numerous other foals were joining in on the fun, and several of the townsponies were taking up a spot alongside me to converse, either with me or among themselves. I got a surprising amount of praise for my efforts and heroism, and once Applejack and the others showed up to help entertain the kids, I had little choice but to join in with all of them.

Despite what they'd been through, they seemed surprisingly stable. Everyone was, really. I suppose nothing too serious happened to them directly, so that's not all that surprising. Rainbow Dash was busy regaling some of the children with a very censored version of what happened to us as we made our way through the Everfree Forest and confronted the 'Dark Queen Nightmare Moon'. Her version included more explosions and daring feats of course, such as Fluttershy wrestling the manticore and her fighting an entire squadron of Shadowbolts all on her own.

My favorite part was when she completely fabricated how I fought Nightmare Moon. Apparently I had to go to the hospital because I threw fireballs and called down lightning from the sky with such ferocity and frequency that I'd burned myself out in a desperate bid to overpower a Goddess. Instead I merely matched her. So I guess I'm as strong as a Goddess? Well, okay then. Whatever gets Spike and all these children smiling, I suppose!

Suddenly I found myself straight drownin' in children. They wanted a magic show that, sadly, I couldn't give them. I promised to give them one later though...no fireballs or explosions though. That's a bit too dangerous, and I'm not in the habit of putting my power on display. Still, it was difficult to not have their attention for a time when as far as they knew, you were 'powerful enough to fight a divine being and survive', as Rainbow put it towards the end of her tale.

It was a long and fairly exhausting day that went by, entertaining kids, conversing with complete strangers and...well, being treated like a friend. A drinking buddy, a pal, a compatriot. These ponies were so trusting and giving of themselves...it was such a pure, untainted thing and it was only a very short distance from the poisonous capital of the country. How had the Mafia not defiled this place like they had everywhere else?

By the time the sun began to lower over the horizon, Spike was yawning and looking particularly worn out. He wasn't used to having other little fillies and colts to play with, and he certainly wasn't as active as he should've been at his age. It didn't surprise me at all that he was running on empty.

The crowd was beginning to thin now that it was getting late, and closer to dinnertime. I headed for the library after bidding many of my new friends goodbye, as well as a few old ones. I knew Vinyl Scratch and Octavia lived here, but I wasn't aware Lyra had moved out here at some point! Even found herself a nice mare to settle down with. They swear they're just best friends, but I know bullshit when I smell it.

About halfway there though, I noticed that a lot of ponies were heading in the same direction. A single curious inquiry later, and I licked my lips at the thought of heading down to Sweet Apple Acres with everypony else to join in on a big feast. Spike was dozing on my back all the way there.

When we arrived, I could tell that this was where things really started to kick off for everyone. Earlier was a more innocent warm-up. This? This was hard cider getting passed around and barbecued vegetables, dried fruits and Apple Family cooking being prepped en-masse to feed the entire town, just about. Surely not everyone was here?

I figured this wasn't a normal occurrence either, unless this town was really that saccharine-sweet, so I kept an eye out as I approached. Sure enough I spotted them, front-and-center, Celestia and Luna, waiting for the food to finish getting cooked up. The nobles can say whatever they want about 'commoner food', the Apple Family makes some good eats, and clearly Princess Celestia knew this.

What had me curious as I got closer was that Luna was wide-eyed and almost leaning out of her seat, watching food sizzle on the grills while plates were brought out from the farmhouse. Ponies were already well on their way to getting tipsy, and the food was going almost as fast as it was being made. The moment a plate of freshly-cooked veggies was put in front of Luna, her forelegs were shaking as she reached for her spoon and fork.

Then she took her first bite. The loud din of laughter and chatter masked it somewhat, but given I was close enough, I got to hear the nigh-orgasmic moan she let out. Her eyes fluttered closed as she chewed, and more than a few heads turned her way, but I could tell she both didn't notice and wouldn't have cared if she did. That face? That was the face of one who had found Nirvana.

She took bite after bite of food, finishing off her plate and quickly asking for another. There was no royal decorum about it, and all things considered, that was probably a good thing. This was a down-home get-together. No need to put on airs. She was one hungry mare and the food was for everyone, why not pile it on?

"What's wrong with her?" I asked Celestia, while holding a mug of hard cider.

Celestia glanced over at her sister. "This is her first meal in a thousand years. She had forgotten what food tastes like, forgotten the smell and the texture of food on her tongue."

"Oh. I suppose you'd forget simple things like that after a thousand years," I muttered, taking a swig of my cider. "I mean, sometimes I forget where I left my house keys after putting them down the night before."

She hummed idly while taking a bite of a cooked yam, the corner of her eye curling up in a genuine show of delight. "Not quite a five-star dish, but...definitely still good."

"That's debatable," I said, smirking a little as Apple Bloom led Spike over to one of the large picnic tables covered with fresh food. "I had some of their food yesterday. I think it tastes better."

She spooned a mouthful of sweet corn into her mouth and chewed a little before smiling at me. "I suppose we'll have to agree to disagree."

I mock-gasped. "The great Princess Celestia, talking with her mouth full? The scandal!"

"Oh, yes," she said, chewing a bit more before swallowing. "Clearly, I have been infected by the Apple Family's country ways! Next thing you know, I'll be belching as loud as possible and shouting about how 'that's good eatin', boy-howdy!'"

I almost spilled my drink, laughing at that. We shared in a companionable silence after that, my eyes being drawn to the buffet table Spike had gone to. He was holding a small plate in his hand while he listened and talked with some of the other young fillies and colts, ones he'd played with earlier.

"Spike seems to be enjoying himself," I heard Celestia say. "I haven't seen him smile like that since he was a little babbling baby."

"Mmmhmm," I hummed, smiling fondly at the sight of him talking and laughing with others closer to his age. "I never got to see him like this in Canterlot. It's nice."

"You know, the library is in need of a new librarian," she said in that suggestive way that only those more experienced in dealing with her can recognize. "If you so desired, you could stay here, in Ponyville."

I gave her a brief glance, then looked back to Spike, contemplating the offer. He was in the middle of talking about something to a few other kids, and they were asking him plenty of questions in return. Probably not often they get to talk with a kid from the city, and despite the age difference, they all seemed to be getting along. It was...I almost went through with it.

Outside of my future plans, and maybe my big brother, Spike was and is my everything. Even my continuing efforts in the studies of magic as Celestia's pupil have been spurred on by a need to care for him. I needed money, the availability of Cadance and other trustworthy caretakers, especially when I was younger and totally new to all of this. I certainly couldn't count on my parents for that.

My gaze wandered over the shuffling crowd of ponies that were talking and celebrating our victory over Nightmare Moon. There was no hesitation in their embraces, their words or their expressions. No desire to hide what they were really feeling. It was in stark contrast to my entire life, where keeping track of one's facial expressions, words and the tone behind them was paramount...like some kind of life-long game of Poker with pretty much everyone, at all times.

This town was far too innocent. I didn't belong here. If I moved here and went through with what I'd planned all these years...no. I'd poison this place with my mere existence within it.

"A tempting offer, Princess...but I'd have to decline," I said slowly, downing what was in my mug, finishing off my drink. "No matter how tempting the offer is."

A pair of ponies ran past us, both of them having imbibed of far too much alcohol than was acceptable in front of children, but then, perhaps things were a bit different when you were celebrating the fact that the world was no longer doomed to a slow, torturous death. Considering the fact that Applejack's brother was wheeling out even more barrels of the good stuff...yeah. Pretty sure destroying brain cells was entirely the point of the evening.

"I see," Celestia said, the disappointment on her face all too obvious to me. It was all in that single exposed eyebrow of hers, you see. "That's very unfortunate. I have no doubt Spike would be very happy here."

I nodded slowly in agreement. "Yeah...I know."

It was quiet between us for a time, until Celestia stood up and walked over towards where Big Macintosh was busy refilling mugs for a long line of ponies. She returned with a mug of her own, along with a new mug for me. I accepted it happily.

I noticed out of the corner of my eye that Luna had gotten a mug herself at some point as well. She still seemed very meek among the crowd, but she had a small following of stallions and mares from the town all cheering her on while she chugged the contents of her mug down.

It still surprised me just how accepting these townsponies were of Princess Luna. Nightmare Moon, reformed. I mean, being one of the ponies that purified her with the Elements, I could accept her just fine, but how were any of them to know she was totally on the level? Regardless, plenty of stallions were trying to chat it up with her, the ingestion of fairly large amounts of alcohol probably bolstering their courage to do so. Despite the lack of a proper shower, a brush in her mane, everything like that, she still looked fantastic. Kinda demure and tender, if you ask me.

I think those stallions didn't have enough alcohol in the universe to have a shot at her, but eh, a thousand years of isolation just might make you lower your standards to the bottom-most rung, so what do I know?

There was a small nudge on my wither, and I glanced over to see Celestia giving me a look while holding her mug closer to her muzzle. I did the same with my own, and her smile widened slowly.

"Are you challenging me, Princess?" I asked, my voice strangely muffled by the mug itself.

"That depends," she said, that light upward lilt in her voice always an indication of her more mischievous nature. "Do you accept the challenge?"

"If I did, you'd beat me with ease."

She giggled ever-so-slightly. "And since when has that ever stopped you, my faithful student?"

"True."

The ponies that were nearby were startled when Luna threw down one of her mugs, splintering the wooden container on the dirt ground and calling with her Royal Canterlot Voice for another. There was a momentary pause that gave me time to stabilize the drink I'd almost dropped from the sudden loud outburst, which was quickly followed by a sudden raucous cheer. It only got louder when Celestia went over to tell her that we were going to have a drink-off, and Luna came over to join us.

What happened after that was something I can guarantee the nobles cried 'Scandal!' over. Ponies cheered as myself and the Princesses knocked back drink after drink together. Here's the thing about Princess Celestia though: she's really good at holding her liquor. These days, alcohol's just a part of negotiations, be it with the nobility or with foreign Ambassadors, friends, family, you name it. She has a liver made of solid magisteel. My chances of winning against her in a drinking contest? Zero to none.

Because of that, I knew when to bow out. I did manage to outlast Princess Luna, though I'm guessing I only pulled that off due to over a thousand years of being sober and having already chugged several drinks prior to joining up with us. Needless to say, she was catching a nap on the royal chariot, in a most undignified position. I don't think anyone cared, save for a few stallions that were just drunk enough to believe they had a chance.

That just left Celestia and I, and I immediately conceded defeat as soon as my senses began to dull and my eyesight began to get really fuzzy. The world spun as the several mugs of cider I'd chugged went to work on my bloodstream, while Celestia just sat there, as serene as ever. The only hint of her being inebriated was a consistent rosy tint to her cheeks, easy to see with her pure white fur. I swear she could chug a forty and be just fine afterwards.

I found myself being braced by the other heroes of the day, though Applejack was looking a lot less wobbly than everyone else. My memories of the rest of the night are hazy at best to this day. I recall making out with a few stallions in various stages of drunkenness, getting slapped by someone's wife for making out with them, aaand I actually threw a bit at Rarity's ass. Fun fact: it bounced pretty damn far!

Then I woke up with a pulsing headache, and a warm body snuggled up against mine...in Fluttershy's bed.

Author's Note

Oh, and just so everyone knows, for those that don't quite get why I put Epilogue in the title...

This is not the epilogue of the story. Just this story arc.

With that out of the way, enjoy speculating on who might be in the bed with Twilight right now! :raritywink:

Chapter 11 - Action

written by Fire Soul

I slowly tried to lift my head, despite someone's muzzle being tucked in against the side of my throat. My skull was throbbing, and I reached up to check my horn to make sure the inhibitor ring was still there. Fortunately, it was still right where it was supposed to be, so I didn't have to worry about my mana leaking into my head-meat.

Normally I avoided getting so drunk. Aside from inhibiting my senses and making me more vulnerable to ponies with ill intent, ponies of which I was once constantly surrounded by, there was also the fact that after hatching Spike, it was just plain irresponsible to get drunk around him. Inebriated, maybe buzzed? Sure, that's fine. I've always been honest with him, he knows what alcohol is. He also knows I'll tan his hide until he can qualify as new, exotic sofa upholstery if he ever goes near the stuff before he's of legal age.

What? Just because I started drinking when I was ten doesn't mean a thing. I'll be a hypocrite if I want. Any decent parent would be a hypocrite if you ask me.

I slowly tried to sit myself up, restraining the groan that threatened to break free of the confines of my dry and raspy throat. I needed to go to the bathroom and get some hydration in my system to help deal with this headache. Also painkillers. I could only hope that...hm, who was I in bed with anyway? Logic would denote that it would be Fluttershy, but this wouldn't be the first time I've woken up in a stranger's bed with someone that wasn't the owner of said bed. Oh, that guy's roommate was so pissed at us because of the stains....!

Logic won this round, much to my relief. Fluttershy was laying there next to me, her forelegs curled around my barrel and hugging me with a strong grip that you wouldn't expect from someone as luxuriously soft as her. Her fur was so soft and smooth and vibrant up-close...but, I didn't really have the mentality to thoroughly appreciate it at the time. The bathroom beckoned, both because my bladder was feeling full and because it held promises of water and aspirin.

It was difficult to ever-so-slowly free myself from her embrace, but when I managed to replace myself with a pillow, I quietly made my way to her bathroom after a moment of searching for it. It wasn't attached to her bedroom, like mine was back at home. The fact that I was naked didn't even fully register until I looked down at myself while angling for the toilet. Should've been obvious from the moment I woke up, really. Eh, alcohol and hangovers.

As I relieved myself and took the time to track down a paper cup and some aspirin, my memories slowly but surely began to return to me. Memories of a night of revelry, ponies hoofing over fresh mugs of cider even though I was already pretty drunk, Rarity smacking me, I...believe the big red-furred stallion I made out with at one point was Big Macintosh, aaand then a pegasus named Thunderlane...huh. Wow, I got pretty wild. Hope Spike didn't see any of that. At least my clothes stayed on until it was just Fluttershy and myself.

I downed my third paper cup of lukewarm water while pondering on her. She was easily the most surprising event of the evening. She got smashed. From what I could tell, she wasn't really used to such large social gatherings, but there was no way for her to get away from any of it, so in lieu of a comfort zone, she substituted alcohol. Lots of alcohol. Not that I fault her for that, the Apple Family's hard cider is the stuff of legends.

As I finished a fifth cup of water, I filled up another one and brought it with me, not that it was a lot, and stepped back out into the hallway, heading for her bedroom. The curtains weren't drawn, and the morning light was almost searing my retinas, or so it felt, so I went to close them. Fluttershy didn't seem to appreciate it either, with how she was groaning in her sleep and kicking her legs about, trying to roll over.

A dull thump sounded off after I closed the blinds, and I looked over at the bed to see that Fluttershy had kicked...a big, black double-sided dildo off of the bedsheets. I stared in awe at the gigantic thing, the thickness of it beyond the size of most Equestrians, so I was guessing it was a Saddle Arabian design? That was when I noticed numerous other toys littering the floor.

I remembered her hitting on me. Drunkenly of course, but considering we were both drunk, it worked plenty well. Didn't hurt that I wanted everything her sexy body had to offer before we went off saving the world. Of course, I didn't know what all she had to offer exactly before last night. I leaned my head a little to the left and saw an open chest full of various toys that we hadn't gotten around to using. The ground was littered with the rest.

I wish I could remember more of the details. Which one of us had worn that butterfly ballgag?

It goes without saying that Fluttershy's a freak in the sack. It's always the quiet ones, know what I mean? Always too quiet and reserved to go out and get some action for themselves, so they get curious, horny, frustrated...and they start learning about things like bondage and numerous different sex toys, all that stuff. Why do I know what anal vibrators, bin-wa balls and bondage are? Well, I am a pervert that loves to experiment and learn about new things. Do you need a better explanation than that?

Unfortunately, this whole situation presented a problem. This was normally the moment where I put my mind magic to use to manipulate her memories of our fun night together so that, for all she knew, she'd just bedded a mare. Aside from the fact that my magic wasn't available for proper use at the moment, I don't think I could've brought myself to actually do that to her. As unsure as I was about the six of us, I could at least believe that they were my friends. It just felt...wrong, to think about doing that to any of them, let alone going through with it.

She let out a low, keening wail as she rolled over onto her back, and I pulled the covers off of her with a hoof. She gasped, startled at the action, and curled in on herself. The way she writhed reminded me of several incidents in which I'd spent the night with an inebriated acquaintance, only to find them suffering the next morning.

It was slow, the way she turned over to look at me. She was messy, covered in dried-up fluids far more than I was, as was evident by the more sticky-looking parts of her fur that looked all stuck together and nasty. Her mane was disheveled and splayed out underneath her head, giving me a full view of her wide eyes, shocked by my presence in her bedroom. My best guess was that she either didn't remember what happened last night at all, or her head was too full of fuck-you-for-doing-this-to-me that her memories were being withheld.

"Hey," I said as quietly as I could while she stared at me, like a lamb staring up at a lion. "Here. Water, not cold. It'll help."

She stared up at me for a moment, gave a quick glance to the paper cup, then blushed profusely and slowly eased herself up into a sitting position. If the sudden red color of her cheeks was any indication, she was utterly mortified by our current situation. I can't deny it was just a little bit awkward.

"Thank you...."

Her voice was barely audible, especially with the sounds of little critters waking up downstairs. I was silently thankful she didn't let those little squirrels and cats and such into her bedroom at night.

She downed the water in seconds once the first drop touched her parched and no doubt nasty-feeling tongue. Sexual deviancies aside, knocking back booze always made your mouth feel and taste terrible the morning after. If you don't know what I'm talking about, you're both missing out, and one fortunate pony.

Unfortunately for her, she drank far more than she ever should've. She didn't seem the type, and judging by how miserable she looked, I was correct. She was holding her head and clenching her eyes shut. Even the light clop of my hooves against her floor seemed to make her wince as I went to get her another cup of water. The whole time, she couldn't bring herself to say a single thing or even look at me.

That was the routine for an undetermined amount of time. I kept on drinking water myself, and I brought her some aspirin to help with the headache, making short trips to and from the bathroom until she seemed capable of getting onto her hooves and staying on them by herself. We both needed a shower, and I couldn't brace her in there.

While she offered no protest, I could tell she was extremely anxious, being so close to me after last night. You have to understand, sober Fluttershy is very different from drunk Fluttershy. Holy wow, did she hit on me! Could've mistaken her for a sex-starved hermaphrodite with zero shame, with how she was hanging on me and whispering dirty things in my ears, nipping at them and pulling me away from the party to head back to her cottage!

Of course, I also didn't resist, soooo...it's hard to say if I took advantage of her, if she took advantage of me, or if we took advantage of each other. Probably that last one.

The moment that hot water washed over us, it was an almost instant relief. I'm sure she'd intended to shower alone, but since she'd opted to remain mostly silent, I just kinda slipped in with her. She still couldn't bring herself to look me in the eyes, even when I took the time to wash her back. And her flank. And her hindlegs. And whatever else she'd let me touch, which was almost everything. Despite her bashful nature, I think she liked it.

I didn't realize why she liked that kind of treatment until much later, but needless to say, she's into pet play. Not just the kinky kind, but...sometimes she wishes she could be the one that gets taken care of instead of taking care of all the animals. I can understand that sort of desire. I've been coddled before. Not very often, but it's happened, and it's still enjoyable even when you're not a little filly anymore.

Before you ask why I was being all cozy with her, the simple answer is that I'm not an asshole. I'm a monster, sure, but I don't need to be an asshole about it. I didn't always lure Mafia goons back to my place. Sometimes I snagged a cute young thing that had nothing to do with them. It just wasn't always me, if you catch my drift. Those were the types I woke up with, washed up with and had a bit of breakfast with. Usually. Some were total jerks, but what can you do?

When we were done with our shower, and no, nothing sexual happened in there, c'mon we were hung-over and feeling pretty bleh...I had to ask her if I could borrow a spare toothbrush because for obvious reasons, I hadn't brought my own. Little too drunk to stumble back to the library and fetch my hygienic necessities. She was still a bit tense and afraid to speak above a whisper, but at least she didn't look like a cornered rabbit waiting for a chance to bolt anymore.

Speaking of rabbits....!

It was an awkward moment when we finally went downstairs and found numerous small animals running around between their homes...which I was sure wasn't legally allowed. Still, I had no intention of saying anything, it didn't matter to me. Instead, I was more intent on getting some food in my belly, preferably something that wouldn't get my stomach screaming in protest and sending the contents back up my esophagus.

Fluttershy had the same idea I guess, since our breakfast consisted of water and a whole lot of toast with jam on it. A better option than eggs, certainly. I probably would've vomited if I so much as smelled eggs cooking.

We sat in silence for a time, the light crunch of us both biting into toast the only noise aside from the animals running around the living room. They seemed to understand that they needed to stay out of the kitchen, if only for sanitary reasons. I mean, gross, squirrels running around the place where you prepare and possibly eat your food?

All but one of the animals, I should say. A familiar small white bunny came hopping into the room, hopping up onto my back and then hopping up onto the table. He only barely missed knocking over my glass of water, and I just watched as he hopped right up in front of Fluttershy.

I would've complained if it weren't for how her eyes, tired as they were, lit up at the sight of him. It was cute, and he seemed a bit more special to her than the others were.

He squeaked and flailed his arms at her a little while she rubbed her head and nodded to him. I scowled when he suddenly turned and glared at me.

"What? What'd I do?" I muttered, giving him a dirty look in return.

The rabbit hopped over and jumped...right on top of my last piece of toast. That fucker. He squeaked and shrieked with all his rabbity might at me, his little arms pointing at me accusingly while Fluttershy tried to talk him down, to no avail. I guess he thought I got his owner drunk on purpose or something? I dunno. All I knew was, he didn't chill out until Fluttershy got him a few carrots for him to nibble on. Plus she used a towel to wipe his feet clean of jam. Even then, he was giving me the stink-eye.

My toast was ruined, so I just settled for what I'd already ate. Truth be told, I was already feeling better, and Fluttershy looked like she was as well. I was thankful for that at least, but now...we were caught in the awkward zone again. With Angel munching on his own meal, it was just Fluttershy and I, with me sitting there and her sitting across the table, nervously pawing at the tabletop while I crossed my forelegs and leaned my weight on them a little atop the table.

"So..." I muttered, clearing my throat. "Last night-"

"I-I don't normally drink that much!" she suddenly blurted out, cutting me off.

We stared at each other for a moment before we continued. "Rainbow usually stops me. I get...nervous, in big crowds..." she muttered, almost inaudible. "Alcohol helps me relax in those situations, but usually Rainbow cuts me off."

"Plus, Apple Family cider's delicious." I pointed out, nodding sagely.

Her quiet tittering laughter was better than coffee. Already I could feel the gears connected to the hamster wheel in my head beginning to turn more smoothly as I shook off the hangover bit by bit.

"Hm-hm! Y-yes, that too," she said, shuffling a little in her seat. "I'm, um, very sorry about what happened, if it...i-if it upsets you, I mean...."

I waved it off and cracked a wide smile. "I can remember almost everything important about last night, and believe me, those are some really good memories!"

"O-oh!" she said, blushing a deep crimson. "I, um, I see. That is, it's..." she struggled to say to me, shrinking down lower in her seat. "You were nice too."

I smirked at that and leaned back in my seat. "Just nice? I must be losing my touch."

She just smiled at that and looked away, a wistful kind of smile creasing her lips behind that freshly-brushed mane of hers. It was the kind of smile you saw when someone was thinking of or remembering something that they're fond of. Maybe I'm arrogant, but I got the feeling that she was thinking about me.

Of course, that brought me to another issue I needed to talk to her about.

"Uh, about my equipment down there..." I muttered, looking out the kitchen windows. "Could you, maybe...stay quiet about that? Just, as a favor to me?"

The quiet munching died away, and I glanced over to see that same rabbit hopping over and up onto the table again. I calmly pushed my plate aside as he marched right up to me and, without missing a beat, hopped over my crossed forelegs on the table and looked straight down at my crotch. Is it strange that a rabbit was making me feel self-conscious? Probably strange. I wasn't used to anyone examining my package like that, even though he didn't do it for very long.

It only got worse when he stepped back and looked up at me. I didn't know rabbits could quirk an eyebrow. I was learning a lot of strange shit in Ponyville. Well, that or every single inhabitant of this town was batshit insane, but that's a conclusion I pondered on much later down the line.

"Yes, that's a real thing." I muttered down at him.

He just kept on staring at me, then looked back at Fluttershy and chittered something at her. She blushed and lowered her head, mumbling something that even I couldn't hear in the relative quiet of the cottage, and soon the rabbit hopped off the table and took off into the living room.

I watched him go for a moment, then turned back to face Fluttershy. "Can I count on him to stay quiet about it? Not that I think I have to be worried about the animal population knowing I've got a cock."

Fluttershy just blushed a brighter shade of red. I got the feeling she did that a lot when talking about stuff like this. Not surprising, she's a very soft-spoken young lady.

"You don't have to worry about me telling anypony. But..." she said, rubbing her forehooves together while looking up at me. "You should probably tell the others."

"Huh? Who?"

"The, um...the others that have Elements of their own?" she offered, sitting up a little straighter.

"...Why would I do that?"

"Well it's just, Rarity likes to gossip but I think she won't tell anyone if you talk to her about it directly, a-and you'll probably be around more," she said, her tone sounding oddly hopeful at that last part. "So, they um, they might find out by accident, and that could wind up being bad."

"Well, that's...that's strangely well thought-out for someone that's just recovering from a hangover," I said, shrugging a little. "You make a good point."

She tried to hide her smile behind that luxurious mane of hers, but she didn't quite pull it off. "I was thinking about it all morning."

"Really? Even during the shower?"

"Especially during the shower," she said, sliding out of her seat. "Are you done?"

I nodded and slid my plate over as she walked over towards me, getting out of my seat and stretching my neck while she put the dishes in the sink. She didn't wash them just yet, but that was probably because there was some noise kicking up in the living room that demanded her attention. I stepped in there first, and was confronted by a lot of small critters. This couldn't possibly be sanitary, but if no one had come here to shut her down yet, I certainly wasn't going to say anything.

I spotted Angel again, and he was standing at the front door, just glaring at me. He started hopping towards me, and I figured he was just heading into the kitchen again. What I didn't expect when he ran under my legs, was for him to leap up, and karate-kick me square in my jewels. Not even a kind of unrefined kick or anything, that shit was practiced.

Now, for all of you out there that don't know what it's like to get kicked in the balls or you just don't have balls, let me make something perfectly clear to you. A full-powered blow to the crotch? That hurts. You know what hurts more? Something smaller going specifically for your nuts and just thwacking them. It sounds like it doesn't make sense, but it hurts a million times worse.

My hindlegs immediately half-buckled and all the air in my lungs rushed out in a guttural moan of pain as that agonizing ache spread through my lower body. I clopped one of my forehooves at the wooden floor while slowly working myself into turning around, spotting the rabbit actually blowing a raspberry at me.

"Oh, you little fluffrat, come 'ere!"

The chase could hardly be called a chase. It was more like I was hobbling after him as he darted easily around me, and I just barely shifted my hips enough to avoid him nailing me in the nuts again. I reflexively reached out for him with my magic, but the ring on my horn made sure to remind me not to do that with a bit of an electrical sting to the base of my horn. Thus, all I could rely on was my hooves, which weren't all that adept at catching a scurrying, rampaging rabbit. Well, as much as rabbits can rampage, anyways.

"Angel!"

The sharp tone of Fluttershy's voice seemed to make every single creature in the cottage go still and give her their undivided attention. Even I felt an instinctual urge to listen to whatever she had to say. It disappeared as quickly as it came, but still...there was strength hiding within her.

"You stop that this instant!" she said, punctuating her angry words with a light stamp of her hoof. "Now you apologize, mister!"

It was surprising to actually see him cowed into submission like that. It was almost like flipping a switch. I looked over at her in confusion as he hopped over in front of me, though his movements were hesitant. He was a rebellious little thing.

With his carrot in his tiny paws, he set the carrot down in front of me and chittered something at me. I wasn't Fluttershy, so I don't have a clue exactly what he said. When I looked at Fluttershy she seemed pleased, so I just rolled with it. I picked up his carrot and looked it over. I suppose that a half-eaten carrot is a good peace offering between animals around here, but it meant nothing to me. Still....

"Thanks. You're forgiven. Dunno what I did to deserve it, but...okay," I said, hanging on to the carrot and looking over towards the stairs. "I'm gonna go upstairs and get my clothes."

Fluttershy gave me a small nod. "Okay. I'm gonna clean those dishes and get to work."

She headed back into the kitchen, and I discreetly watched Angel hop over towards what looked like an animal carrier, converted into a makeshift home for him. It had a folded-up blanket on the inside, along with what looked like a hoof-built home made of sticks, just for him. I ducked my head down, still feeling some of the ache in my groin, and tapped the edge of the carrier.

"Hey, Angel." I muttered quietly, setting the carrot down just inside of the entrance.

He peeked his head out of his tiny stick-home and looked up at me hesitantly. I motioned him to come out where I could see him better, and when he did, I set the carrot down in front of him. I didn't have to say much of anything for him to get the message, and he reached for the carrot. I gently placed my hoof over it.

"I don't mess with you, you don't mess with me. Got it?"

He gave a quick nod, and I moved my hoof away so he could take his treat back. It was better to not be on his bad side, if I was going to be coming around here more often. Less trouble and hassle that way. I'd just have to work on earning more of his trust down the line. Trying to push it now would just make him suspicious, I'm willing to bet.

With that taken care of, I headed straight upstairs and got my clothes back on. At least those didn't get soiled during last night's round in the sack. It was practically muscle memory, putting one of my suits back on, the smooth shuffle of carefully-crafted cloth so it didn't catch on your fur, the light adjustments to my tie (if I bothered to wear one) to make it rest just right...I'd done it for so long, it came to me without thinking.

When I came back downstairs, Fluttershy was actually laying food out for all the animals inside of the cottage. Food bowls, just pouring it out in piles...the city mare inside of me recoiled at the nastiness of it all as the squirrels, cats and other assorted animals like birds joined in on the morning feast.

"Mornings are busy around here, huh?" I offered, stepping around the hordes of animals that were eating.

"Mmmhmm," she hummed, finishing filling a bowl of food that some chipmunks went at with gusto. "Always. I have a lot of animals to take care of."

I looked around for a moment, then stepped around the animals, heading for the door. "Well, if you don't mind, I need to-oh. Uh-oh."

It came to me so suddenly that I found myself shocked I'd forgotten for even a moment. I knew I'd fucked up now, I just didn't know how much until I tracked him down.

"I need to go find Spike!"

"Oh! Your son, right?" Fluttershy asked, smiling ever-so-slightly. "He's probably at Sweet Apple Acres still."

I stopped in my brief trot towards the door, looking back at her. "Why do you say that?"

"No one told you?"

"Well...no."

Oh! Well, it's simple really," she said, sitting down to dust her hooves off after setting a bag of bird feed down on the floor. "They normally do this at the end of the year, but with what happened, and with everypony celebrating...they decided to do it last night, too. Usually I don't drink like that so they can count on me to help, but, well, you know how that went."

"Okay..." I said, making a circular motion with my hoof. "But what exactly did they do?"

"Oh! Right, they set up a campsite for the fillies and colts, and let them pick their own apples to eat as a late-night snack," she said, smiling a little more. "Nothing sweeter than a freshly-picked apple from Sweet Apple Acres!"

"But, wasn't everypony drinking and getting tipsy?" I asked, fearing the thought of some drunkard watching a huge group of fillies and colts for a night.

Fluttershy waved it off. "No, not everyone drinks. A lot of the Apple Family doesn't drink all that much, and if they do they drink the same cider they give to the kids. You know, non-alcoholic."

I quirked a brow at that. "But...even that cider's alcoholic. It's just such a low amount it's not legally recognized as an alcoholic beverage. Can't even taste it."

"W-well, the kids love it, so...what can I say?"

"Eh, guess you've got a point. Still, Spike's probably worried without me around," I said, moving for the door again. "Maybe I'll see you later?"

She seemed to struggle with something she wanted to say for a moment. "S-sure! Of course! Some other time."

I gave her a quick nod and reached for the door handle, only to freeze when her voice rang out once more.

"Wait! Um...!"

She weaved around her animals while I turned to face her. They only looked up from their food for a moment before realizing that she wasn't talking to them, and promptly went back to munching away. Some of her birds were fluttering down to where she'd left the bird seed and slipped into the opening of the bag, pecking away at the copious meal within.

There was a kind of nervous determination in the way she moved, like she was forcing herself to approach me. I just kept my gaze locked with hers, certain that she'd falter if I gave her anything less than my utmost attention.

"Alright. Something you needed from me?" I asked.

"Yes! Um, not right now, but...okay," she said, taking a deep breath and letting it out, her eyes sliding shut as she tried to calm down. "Come on Fluttershy, you can do this...!"

She looked at me once more, her posture straightening out and a small smile gracing her lips. It was a moment of certainty in her that I got the feeling was a rare thing to see from Fluttershy. I wasn't wrong. The few times I'd seen it from her after that, it usually involved her animals.

Our eyes met, and she inhaled slowly before speaking. "Would you like to do this again sometime?"

I blinked a few times and just kinda stared at her. Here's a fun fact about me: outside of Swirling Breeze, I've never had the same sexual partner. At least, not to my memory. It's usually been brief meetings at bars, like two ships, passing each other in the night. We go to their place, I give them one of the best nights they've ever had, and I leave. Things had already drifted outside of my norm just from me sticking around and not leaving the moment I woke up. Or, y'know, not killing her. She's not with the Mafia though, and there were way too many witnesses to us leaving together, so that wasn't an option. I also wasn't in disguise.

But to have someone like her just up and ask me something like that....

"U-uhm! I mean, if you want to! We don't have to, I just...figured..."

I had apparently been standing there staring for a bit too long for her tastes. Gone was her bravado, and in its place was the same meekness I'd come to expect from her. She was slowly backing away from me, and her voice was getting quieter and quieter as she rambled on.

"It's just, you were really nice, and I realize now that you never said how I was, so I was probably bad, and-"

"Whoa, whoa, hey. Hey!" I said, stepping forward to close the distance between us again. "None of that. You just surprised me is all."

"Oh. I, um, I mean," she struggled to say, her gaze turning down towards the floor, one of her forehooves lightly scuffing the floor. "Sorry."

I wasn't sure how to actually respond to her. Do I just say yes? No? There were a lot of social dynamics to consider here, especially regarding what our friends might think of us doing this. Heh...'our friends'. It was still weird to consider that I have some actual, genuine friends. Fluttershy included.

Then again, she'd taken me by surprise. Perhaps turning that around on her wasn't a bad idea?

I gently reached up with a hoof, slowly tracing a line up the side of her neck. The moment she looked back up at me, I went in for the kill. Hooking my foreleg around the back of her neck, I gave her a light pull while pressing my lips to hers. The squeak she let out was absolutely adorable!

I heard her forehooves clop against the floor in that moment of surprise, her eyes wide as dinner plates as she stared into my eyes. I've been told I can get downright saucy if I let myself get really into it, and this was no exception. My chest pressed against hers and my foreleg gripped her just a bit tighter, and I could feel the tension in her body just from being close to her.

She isn't the first pony I've surprised with that kind of kiss. It's fun, you should try it sometime! It's just tricky to find the right time and pony to do it to. There's this delectable moment right at the beginning when they tense up, like they aren't sure if they should be backing off of not because they're not quite sure what's going on just yet. Their brain hasn't caught up to what their lips are telling it.

That's not the part that gets me going though. The part I enjoy the most. It's the moment of acceptance, when they realize what's happening and they just give themselves to the allure of my muzzle. Sort of like what Fluttershy was doing at that very moment.

I felt her lean in towards me, and soon those wide eyes slid shut while the tension in her body just melted away. I felt her push against me, one of her forelegs reaching up to wrap around my neck in return, and soon there was nothing but the passion of the moment. Her head tilted to one side in a hungry desire to deepen what was already a fairly intimate kiss, and I turned mine the other way.

She pulled at the back of my neck, and I rubbed mine up and down the back of her own, my hoof gently brushing over that luxuriously cared-for mane of hers, feeling the silky strands weaving between my fur as I went. She responded by pushing her muzzle against me more, forcing my head back, but just when I expected her to try to take control, she just...embraced me.

There was a tenderness to her motions, even with her putting her other foreleg around the back of my neck and embracing me completely. Not like she was heavy, it was easy enough to hold up her weight on one foreleg. I was more interested in just how gentle she was being about this. It wasn't hesitation, just a kind of soft touch that I wasn't used to.

Making out with the kinds of ponies I'm used to, it's usually a more messy, heated affair. Their tongues go wild, they throw themselves into the act, and they practically try to smother you. The only thing you can do is respond in kind. It's like a battle of mouths that you must at least try to win.

With ponies like that, it's always like a wild wrestling match that neither of you care about winning or losing as long as it feels good. This right here with Fluttershy...it felt more like her snuggling up against my side and giving me warm nuzzles in comparison. There was no competition, no ferocity that she was letting burst out of her. It was a gentle hunger that she was more than willing to wait on me to satisfy.

I couldn't get enough of it. It was so different and refreshing for me, I didn't want to let go. I can't even tell you how long we kissed, but it at least lasted until we finally broke away from each other to catch our breaths. We'd just started with our tongues, and I could still taste her on my lips. I licked them slowly, savoring that faint taste.

"I'd like that," I whispered. "Doing this again, I mean. Not really looking for a relationship, but...yeah."

The look on her face was priceless. It was always the quiet, reserved ones that were starved for affection in my experience, and the moment you give them that affection, it's like ambrosia to them. They savor it. They give their all in an effort to enjoy what you're offering as much as possible. I couldn't blame her for looking blissed-out, her eyes half-lidded, staring at me with a kind of vacant adoration, a goofy smile adorning an almost angelic visage.

She didn't say anything at first. She just leaned against me for a minute, then those forelegs tightened just a little, and she nuzzled her cheek against my throat, tucking her muzzle under my chin.

"Yay!"

She hugged me tighter, and I responded in kind, and we stayed that way for a time. Some of her squirrels hopped up onto us to see what was going on, but seeing that their caretaker was just fine, they soon left us alone. When we finally let each other go, we said our brief goodbyes once more, with Fluttershy having a bit more pep in her step. Felt good to see that I had that kind of effect on her. Heartwarming, really.

The moment I stepped outside however, I found my heart freezing to stillness in my chest as I was grabbed by some big, powerful clawed paws, and lifted up into the air. All I could see a moment later was a big, gaping maw of teeth.

Author's Note

Ah, and finally, we're moving past the events of Nightmare Moon! You can all blame a commenter by the name of Cross Lament for the bit with Angel. Seriously, I took his idea. It was hilarious. I just had to twist it around a little.

The music I listened to? Well...I think it fits waking up to a peaceful, albeit hangover-tinged morning in Fluttershy's cottage.

Chapter 12 - Honesty

written by Fire Soul

Now, I have said this many times, but I'm no bitch. When I'm in the kind of situation where I could die without even seeing it coming, I don't puss out like some pansy-ass coward. I may retreat, and then come at the problem from a more advantageous position, but I don't run.

However, in those situations, I had my magic at my disposal. Also guns. Usually.

That mouth wasn't open as far as it could've been, apparently. There was a low growl emanating, and those lips were curling back a little to really show off those long rows of carnivorous incisors in all their off-yellow, nasty glory. I guess Fluttershy actually helped take care of his teeth. Those things should've been brown.

You have no idea how hard I was trying to teleport away, but that inhibitor ring was zapping me every time I put even a little magic into my horn, and it only zapped me harder the more magic I poured into it. Not to mention every time I tried, my headache began to come back in surging waves, further encouraging me to stop.

Without my magic at my disposal and no gun to fight back with, not that a pistol would do much in this situation if you think about it, all I could do is feel the terror wash over me and make me lock up, helpless in this much more powerful creature's grasp. I watched his maw open wider, and a moment later, all I could hear was his loud, echoing roar. All I could smell was fish, even as his spittle flecked all over my face.

Obviously, I responded calmly and assertively.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH-!!!"

Yes. Quite calm and assertive, given my situation. I was screaming my head off as calmly as I possibly could, and I was asserting the fact that I was about to shit my pants. I was all too sure that that was how Lady Twilight Sparkle of the Sparkle Family was going to go out. Not by gunfire, not under the knife of some street psychopath, but with her face mauled off and her underwear full of last night's thoroughly processed dinner.

"Harry Bearington!!"

The sudden end of his roar did not come with the end of my scream. I screamed until my lungs were empty, and only then did I go quiet, my entire body shaking with a mix of adrenaline and pure, unfiltered fear for my life.

Fluttershy marched right up next to us and stomped down hard with a hoof. "You put her down this instant, young ursine!"

He did as he was told. Bless that angelic mare, he did exactly what she told him to do, and is it strange that I found it arousing seeing her go all alpha female on him? It was kinda hot, I'm not gonna lie. You don't expect the gentlest mare in Equestria to talk a bear down and make him feel bad in the process.

I stood there while she reprimanded him for his 'bad behavior'. Yes Fluttershy, you could call being one chomp away from killing me a kind of bad behavior. Maybe. I guess. Personally I would go for ponyslaughter, but then maybe I'm just too jaded...or not jaded enough, if attempted murder passes as merely bad behavior around here.

My entire body shook like a leaf in the breeze, and my insides were still doing flips from what had just transpired. I found myself reaching for my pocket to grab my cigar case, but once again, it was missing. If ever there was time for a cigar....

"Angel bunny told you what?!"

My ear flicked at the name, and I scowled. Instantly, the pieces fell into place, and I had to resist the urge to run into that house and drag him off to Canterlot for some very fatal disciplinary measures. She'd never find the body. They never find the body when I'm done.

Even the cackling laughter of a cloud overhead wouldn't pull me away from my wicked thoughts of bunny murder.

I wasn't paying too much attention to their conversation. It wasn't until Fluttershy approached me and the bear began to stalk away, sulking and groaning a kind of whining noise, that I snapped out of it. At some point, she'd gotten a cloth, and she offered it. I accepted it and only then realized that there was some foreign flavor in my mouth. I resisted the urge to vomit and retreated into Fluttershy's house, going right for the mouthwash. Some of that bear spittle had gotten in my muzzle while I was screaming, eeeww!

With a good excuse to get an update on my immunization injections, I stepped back outside, pointedly ignoring the animal carrier Angel was hiding in. If I looked, he might be there looking back at me, and then I might have to make him disappear before leaving the cottage. That wouldn't be good for anypony. Well, except for me. It'd feel really good to feel him squirm and hear him scream in agony....

Fluttershy didn't even have a chance to say anything when she approached me, with Rainbow Dash at her side. I guess she was the one up on the cloud laughing her flank off at my misfortune. Bitch.

"I'm going to turn your rabbit into a comfy set of earmuffs if he ever tries something like that again."

"Hah!" Rainbow Dash barked, holding a forehoof up at me. "I like the sound of that!"

"H-hey! Angel only meant well!" Fluttershy said, scuffing the ground with her hoof. "He thought you were taking advantage of me, a-and hurting me..."

Rainbow Dash's cheery demeanor disappeared for a brief instant, her eyes looking me over for a moment while I processed what Fluttershy had said. Judging by how she turned beet-red and looked to Rainbow suddenly, she didn't entirely think about what she was saying either.

Rainbow shrugged it off and waved her hoof as if to swat a fly away. "Ehh, he's just a jerk sometimes. Plain and simple."

"He means well!" Fluttershy re-asserted, lowering her head. "He's just very protective of me."

"Yeah, I'll say," I muttered. "He sicced a bear on me."

"Harry's not usually like that. He just doesn't really...question things he's told," Fluttershy muttered. "So when Angel told him that you were being really mean to me, and treating me bad, he decided to do something about it. B-but he never would've actually hurt you! Just, um, scared you off."

"What, he doesn't have it in him?" I asked, looking off in the distance, where the bear was tucking into his shelter.

"He was raised with ponies in a circus. He doesn't have a violent bone in his body, at least not around me," Fluttershy said, that faint smile of hers widening. "Being able to actually communicate with animals has its perks."

"Why isn't he with the circus anymore?"

"Oh, the circus he was a part of got shut down. He was really grouchy and temperamental before I took him in here," Fluttershy said, looking over at the woods. "I used to have problems with timberwolves going after the chickens in my coop. Then Harry asserted that this was his territory, and those monsters know better now."

"Yeah, Harry's pretty cool," Rainbow said off to the side, flying upside-down, pretending to recline on nothing. If I didn't know what I did about pegasus magic, I'd say she was showing off. "Long as you don't mess with Fluttershy, anyways. Heh, one heck of a bodyguard you've got!"

Fluttershy smiled at that and shook her head. "You know that's not why I like having him here, Rainbow."

"Yeah, yeah...oh, right," Rainbow said, flipping over and landing back on the ground. "AJ asked me to come get you Twilight. Spike's up, and he's gettin' kinda antsy about you not bein' around."

"So that's why you were here," I muttered, looking over to Fluttershy. "Uh, could you maybe find time to meet up with us at the library later?"

"Around what time?"

"Hm. Not sure," I said, looking over to Rainbow Dash. "Would you mind going to get her? Maybe around noon?"

"Uhhh...wait, what?" she asked, the dumbfounded expression on her face only slightly amusing to me.

"I've got something I need to tell all of you, and someone's convinced me not to put it off," I explained, briefly smiling over at Fluttershy. "So I'm hoping that you all can come to the library for a brief period so I can tell you all at once."

"...Well okay," Rainbow said, shrugging a little and flitting her wings. "I guess I can come around to get Fluttershy later."

"The others, too?"

"Others?"

"You know, the other ponies that helped us save the world?"

"Oh! Right, sure," Rainbow said, a slow smile widening into a full-on grin. "Saving the world...still can't believe that I'm a world-renowned hero."

"Yeah, you and me both," I said, spotting Fluttershy speaking to a small mouse that'd approached her. "We're heading out now, Fluttershy!"

She perked her ears and turned to look over at me, nodding once. "Alright! I'll be here!"

With a brief goodbye from Rainbow Dash as well, she and I headed back towards town, making our way towards Sweet Apple Acres. The entire time, Rainbow was giving me strange looks. Just kinda looking me over out of the corner of her eye, as if she was trying to judge me. Eventually I looked over at her in return.

"Something I can help you with?"

"Eh, it's nothing!" she said far too quickly for her to be convincing.

"Right. In any case, I'm thinking maybe around noon, you could get everyone to come to Golden Oaks?"

"Yeah, sure, no problem."

"M'kay."

We kept on walking. I knew it was coming, I was just waiting for it. I didn't exactly know what she was going to ask, but I was certain it involved Fluttershy.

"So. You fucked Fluttershy?"

I blinked at that and looked over at her. "I don't see how it's any of your business whether I did or didn't."

"Uh, yeah, it is," she said, glancing around. "'Cuz I know how she is. Better than you."

"Uh...huh. That still doesn't make it seem like it's any of your business."

"Okay look, I don't want any details," she said, shrugging it off and looking away from me. "Just make sure you sit her down and talk things out with her. She's kinda fragile."

I shook my head at that. "She's a grown-ass mare, Rainbow. I'm quite sure she'll be fine."

"Okay, maybe I wasn't being clear."

Her hoof found my wither, and I found myself being halted in my tracks by a surprisingly firm grip. She pulled back and urged me to turn to face her, and she stopped to look me right in the eyes, her brow furrowed and her eyes glaring into my own. Apparently civility was out the window in this scenario.

"You need to sit her down and talk to her before you wind up hurting her."

I stared at her, glanced down at the hoof on my wither, then back up at her. "And how would I hurt her, exactly?"

"You saw how she was last night," she said, stepping back. "You're now in the same position several other stallions and mares have been in, and it hasn't always ended nicely. She gets attached. She doesn't get the message unless you sit her down, demand her attention, and talk it out with her."

"...You seem remarkably well-informed on her sexual escapades." I muttered.

She rubbed one foreleg against the other, looking away from me. "I got curious when we were younger, and she's very...well, she can be affectionate if you let her. That's when she gets attached. But I just wasn't into it," she said, shrugging. "She's really attractive and all, but I'm just not into mares."

I snorted at that and grinned. "Bet your mane makes everypony think otherwise."

"Hey, you bashin' my style, egghead?" she asked, smirking and giving me a nudge with a hoof. "Them's fightin' words."

"Eh, I'll kick your ass later," I said, looking back down the path, where we'd come from. "So. Desperate?"

"Not...mmgh, I don't wanna say she's desperate," she said, rubbing the back of her neck. "Just, I dunno, she's kinda...she's got a big heart, and when you let her in, she doesn't know how to stop giving you that big heart of hers unless you lay it out just so for her. She loves very easily."

"Hm. I'll keep that in mind."

"Hey, I'm not messin' around here. Fluttershy's been my friend since Flight School," she said, pointing a hoof at me. "You hurt her, I make sure you eat your teeth. You get me?"

I leaned back away from her hoof and nodded. "Yeah. I got it, it's fine. I'll talk with her before I go back to Canterlot."

She spread her wings and fluttered into the air. "Good. Anyways, noon right? I'll be around! You said you wanted me to get the others too?"

"Well I'd appreciate it. I just need some assistance because I plan on taking Spike out for some ice cream. You know," I said, waggling a hoof in the air with a small 'woo'. "Saving the world celebration, just the two of us."

"Sure, got it! You can probably tell Applejack too, while you're at it. Anyways," she said, pointing to the sky. "I need to get back to work. See ya!"

With that, Rainbow was off in a blur. Damn, and I'd forgotten to ask about how much rainbow she has to use in her mane and tail to get it to look like that! Ah well, I'd find out later anyways, so it was no big deal.

We'd gotten far enough along that I could make my way back to Sweet Apple Acres just fine on my own. When I arrived, ponies were milling about, several of them looking like warmed-over Tartarus, while others were helping them get back to their homes. Things must've gotten wild after Fluttershy and I left, and that's saying something!

I walked past several members of the Apple Family that were chatting it up, asking around for where Applejack was. I could hear hooves clonking loudly against tall, solid apple trees in the distance, far more than just one or two ponies, and I could tell that AJ had some assistance today. Considering her entire extended family was still sticking around after last night, that wasn't all that surprising.

After somepony pointed me in the direction Applejack would be working at, and after that someone told me she had a little dragon walking around listening to her talk about bucking apples, I made my way through the orchard, following the pathways she'd directed me towards until I found some other ponies working as well. They pointed me right to where Applejack was.

When I found her, Spike was sitting on her back, munching on an apple. He ate those things differently from ponies, in the sense that with those sharp teeth, he just munched it down core and all. It took me a long time to get him out of the messy way he used to eat. You know those documentary videos about lions hunting and killing their prey, then just burying their face in the stomach and omnomnom'ing away? Yeah, he used to be like that with apples and other foods when he was a little newborn. The apple guts that marred his face, his hands and his surroundings when he did that...ugh. Such a hassle to clean up!

She was walking around a tree, looking up into the branches of it before nudging some large wooden baskets into position, nudging them this way and that. By the time Spike had finished his apple, she was just finishing getting them into place.

"A'right Spike, now just hop on down an' I'll show ya how us Apples do a good old-fashioned applebuck!" she said, the muscles in her hindlegs visibly tensing as she prepared.

"Okay!"

I watched them while approaching, a small smile gracing my muzzle as I watched Spike give Applejack his undivided attention. I focused in on how she was turning and seeming to 'prep' her hindlegs for what she was about to do. She was quick about it. I almost didn't see the burst of magic in the instant she bucked the side of the tree. A resounding wooden clunk was heard, and suddenly the tree dropped all of the apples it had in its branches.

"That's cool!" Spike said suddenly, walking up to one of the bins and looking into it, before looking up into the tree. "Is that magic?"

"Eeyup!" she said, standing tall and proud as she stamped one of her hindlegs. "Been workin' these babies since I was a little little pony! These trees know mah touch like you know yer Mom!"

I wasn't even going to comment on how wrong that sounded. To a child's mind I'm sure it sounded innocent enough, but to a mind like mine, pedophilia was the very first word that popped up in my head. Then again, perhaps it didn't occur to her either. This town was certainly innocent enough.

"I dunno about that," I said, calling out to them while walking towards the pair. "I do still have to give him baths."

"Not surprisin'," Applejack retorted, motioning a hoof around the area. "Me an' my brother got work ta take care of every day. Every mornin', we go 'round, buckin' these trees even if they don't have any apples on 'em, nowhere near how we usually do, mind. Like I said, they know mah touch. They're like family."

I couldn't really argue with that, and as Spike clambered up onto my back as he usually did, I informed Applejack about meeting up with us at the library at noon. I knew it wouldn't take much time out of her day, and I made sure that she knew that, so she agreed to show up. I would prefer to tell them all at once, but there would be no guarantees, of that I could be sure. So instead of focusing on that, I left informing the others to Rainbow Dash and took Spike out for ice cream.

While he enjoyed a nice triple-scoop ice cream, sadly lacking the gem dust he usually liked on top of his treats, I ate a banana split. It'd been ages since I'd just sat down to have one, but I felt...I don't know, relaxed? More relaxed than I'd been in years, even in Spike's presence. World-ending apocalypse-prevention aside, just being around here was...soothing. I didn't feel eyes on my back, the paranoid phantasms of being watched, evaluated, sized up by some thug in an alleyway, just waiting for an opportunity.

I felt peace here. Trust. That terrified me, with how it lured me in with its dulcet tones of safety and tranquility. I still had a job to do, and I couldn't afford to leave that task unattended. I couldn't afford to bask in this kind of stagnating calm.

Of course, there was the concern about revealing my true gender to my new friends. That hadn't left me, I was just trying to ignore it and enjoy some time with Spike, without any nobility or studies getting in the way of it. I didn't even need to ask for him to start gushing about Apple Bloom and the other younger members of the Apple Family that he'd played with yesterday. Telling scary stories by the campfire about the pony in the black suit that spirits away children too curious for their own good, never to be seen again, the old mare looking for her rusty horseshoe, all things I never really got to experience growing up.

I was happy for him. Truly, I was. Could I be faulted for feeling just a little jealous of him, however? I'm only equine.

The rest of the morning was just he and I, wandering around Ponyville. I considered visiting with Lyra and her marefri-I MEAN best friend and roommate Bon-Bon, but...no. It wasn't the right time for that. I'd love to re-connect with old friends and such, but now wasn't the time. I had enough on my plate. I couldn't even imagine what Lyra might have to say to me after I pushed her and the rest of them away when we were little fillies.

By the time we got back to the library, it was pretty close to noon, and no one had shown up yet aside from Pinkie. She tried to stay sitting in one place, but I swear even her cushion was vibrating under her raw exuberance at being let in on what she perceived was a secret. She wasn't wrong, but still, she was shockingly hyper. For her, I mean.

The others, much to my relief, showed up before she actually wound up exploding on me. I was in the middle of reading a book to Spike that he'd pointed out off of the shelf when Rainbow Dash flew in (through the window mind you), and Rarity came in thankfully through the front door. Fluttershy and Applejack showed up at just about the same time.

I gathered them all around the table, and Spike, dutiful and adorable little gentledrake that he was, walked around pouring them all a cup of tea. You'd be surprised at how much of a crowd-pleaser it is, having him serve you. Even Celestia finds it adorable and charming, and tea's just kind of a part of her everyday life. Rarity was practically cooing at how cute he was, waddling along around the center table of the library's lobby area, a pot of tea in his claws while I set out their cups. He even made sure to ask before pouring a cup. Rainbow herself couldn't resist his charms. I'd taught him well.

I sat there and sipped a bit from my own cup while Spike got up on his tip-toes next to me to put the tea kettle back onto the tray he'd retrieved it from. I slid it a bit closer so he didn't have to reach so far. Less chance of him slipping up and spilling scalding-hot tea all over me. I'd be concerned about him getting burned, but uh...dragon. Duh. The kind of temperatures we ponies find relaxing are actually fairly tepid to him. Makes bath-time interesting, when I feel like indulging his desire to just boil. It actually helps to keep his scales shiny and clean. You know your life's taken a weird turn when you're boiling your new son in a big kitchen pot and he's actually enjoying it.

"Well! He is such a little gentlecolt!" Rarity said, her tea cup floating in her magic. "Er, gentledragon? I'm not sure what the proper terminology would be."

"Neither am I. Dragons don't exactly have nobility or what we would normally consider proper manners, they just have Elders, and they certainly don't attend pony tea parties," I said in a playful tone. "But I've taken to calling him a gentledrake."

"Gentledrake it is then!" Rarity said happily, sipping at her tea. "So Spike could be considered the first of his own kind?"

"Not quite. There are dragons that live in Manehattan, smaller species and ones that haven't caved to the greed that the ones near the Badlands have," I explained, waving it off. "The ones who lose themselves to greed are a problem, but let's not bring down the mood by talking about them, hm?"

"O-of course," I heard Fluttershy stutter, discreetly taking a sip of her own tea. She seemed particularly nervous. "Twilight said she had something to share with all of you."

Oh, shit. I really wish she hadn't said it that way. I lowered my head a little as I felt Spike's claws carefully help him climb his way up my back, until he could drape his arms over my withers and just lounge against the back of my neck and upper back. It was one of his favorite places to take a nap, or just relax when I was having a conversation with somepony.

"Heh! Make it sound like ya already know, Fluttershy." AJ said, quirking a brow.

That was the moment she realized what she actually said, I think, because she clammed up and started to turn beet-red. Now we had their attention, it seemed. Rainbow Dash was just grinning and tapping a forehoof against the top of the table.

"Oh, I'll bet she knows plenty about Twilight," Rainbow muttered gleefully, leaning forward a little, her tea completely untouched. "But I guess it's somethin' special...."

"You be quiet," I stated firmly, clacking my tea cup down onto its saucer noisily. "You're embarrassing Fluttershy even worse."

Rainbow looked over to Fluttershy, then snorted and waved off the whole thing with one of her wings. Rarity didn't seem to take to her friend being embarrassed like that either, judging by the dirty look she was giving the blue pegasus. I was thankful for the chance to think while Rarity gave Rainbow some chiding words, though I had a feeling Rarity knew what Rainbow was getting at and just wanted to shush her before she made it worse.

I glanced over to Fluttershy briefly, before taking a deep breath and nodding to myself. It was now ornever. "I got pretty drunk last night, and Fluttershy took me back to her cottage. She saw me naked."

They all stared at me for a moment. I don't think I've ever felt so self-conscious, considering what I intended to tell them. How fortunate for me that Pinkie was there to help loosen up the tension.

"Uh...sooooo...?"

I fidgeted a little and glanced over at Fluttershy once more, while Spike sat up a little on my back. I had no doubt that he was getting a bit concerned by how nervous I sounded. I couldn't hide it. I had committed to going through with this, and it scared me more than I thought it would, now that I was in the moment.

"So...she saw some things I didn't want her to see. Things I don't like anypony seeing." I muttered, clearing my throat and picking up my tea cup once more. The motions helped calm my nerves just the tiniest smidge.

"Ooh! Like a horrific scar or skin condition that makes clumps of your fur go missing, and it makes you look disfigured and awful?" Pinkie said, her rambling speeding up with every word, it seemed like. "And now you have a condition that makes you terribly afraid of ever being naked EVER?!"

"...No," I said slowly, blinking away my confusion. I had a feeling it was going to become a habit with her. "It's nothing disfiguring or anything. It's just...private."

"So she saw your pussy then?"

I glared over at Rainbow Dash, as did Rarity. I was quickly coming to terms with the fact that Rainbow Dash lacked any kind of filter for her muzzle. Even I'm better than that, and I swear like a fucking sailor. Fuck cunt shit. There's three for free. You're welcome.

"Mom, what's a pussy?"

I could feel my eye twitch. "You will regret the words you've spoken this day, Rainbow Dash."

"It's a vulgar term for a lady's private parts, Spikey-wikey," Rarity said very curtly, blushing just a little. "A gentledrake shouldn't ask such questions, nor should he say such things. Understand?"

"Oh. Sorry," he said, lowering his head against my wither. "Should I not talk about the other part, Mom?"

I immediately cringed, and Spike figured out he'd said something wrong just as quickly. My eyes darted to the others, and it seemed like a few of them didn't quite figure out what he meant, but I could see the recognition in Rarity's eyes. She stared at me wide-eyed, and immediately looked down at her tea.

"Oh. Oh my. No wonder you seem so skittish."

"Huh? Think ah'm missin' somethin' here," AJ said, looking over at Rarity while adjusting her hat. "He's referrin' to stallion parts, so what?"

Rarity shook her head slowly. "It isn't my place to say. I believe I know what Lady Sparkle wishes to tell us now."

"Uh-oh," I heard Spike whisper, looking at me worriedly as he clasped a hand over his mouth. "Sorry, Mom."

"What? What's up?" I heard Rainbow half-shout while leaning on the table more.

I could barely see Pinkie beginning to vibrate with excitement where she sat. I think she knew too, but she was waiting for me to say it.

"Ladies, please," I said, taking a deep breath. "It's...it's a big deal, and...guh!" I said, running a hoof over my muzzle. "I'm a hermaphrodite."

The room went silent for a moment, save for Pinkie humming like some kind of bomb winding up for the inevitable explosion of confetti and streamers that would annihilate all of us with glittery goodness. I would've preferred it, in that moment.

"Uhh...still not gittin'...ah mean, ya don't look like a stallion, but I heard some o' them Canterlot types like ta pretty 'emselves up real good-like n' all-"

"Not that kind of hermaphrodite, Applejack. That's from unusual complications with genetics during a fetus's development and-look, simple answer is," I said, clearing my throat. "My hermaphroditism is due to me having an excessive amount of magic in my body. At least, that's the only consistency doctors have ever found. Doesn't matter if you're a unicorn, pegasus or earth pony. If you're born with excessive magical potential, you have a higher chance of being born with my 'condition', as some would say."

"Oh. Alright," AJ said, shrugging a little. "Still dunno how that's some big deal to ya."

"It is a big deal because Lady Sparkle is a noble. A rather well-known noble at that," Rarity said in response, frowning a little. "A noble who, from what I've heard from every single tabloid I've read and every pony I've ever spoken to, is a mare. Lady Sparkle of House Sparkle."

"I KNEW IT!!"

Well, the Pinkie Pie bomb finally went off. I swore I saw streamers burst out of her when she popped up into the air. I'm actually shocked at how quickly I'd gotten used to her antics. Her unpredictability was, in and of itself, more predictable now that I'd gotten a few samples of her insanity. Not to mention whenever she showed such jubilance, I felt her mind brush against my own before being thoroughly blocked out. How strange that she would have streamers as a part of the perception alteration her mind magic causes....

She didn't even pause to let us get a word in. "When Nightmare Moon was pushing on your shield like 'grr I'm eeevil!' and you were like-" she said rapid-fire, a lock of her fuzzy, curly mane twisting around a flashlight that was, for some reason, being hidden in her mane. She held it with her mane against her forehead like a makeshift horn. "-'HAAA I WON'T LET YOU HURT THEM!' and then she started pushing you back, and I got behind you and tried to push you forward!"

She was out of her seat and jumping around, re-enacting the scene with startling accuracy for someone that seemed so spastic. I'm not even going to ask how she was acting out pushing against my ass without anything to push against with such skill that I'd swear she was a mime and there was an actual invisible box she was using in my place.

"Then I started pushing at her with my hooves, but one of 'em reached too low at first and I swore I felt dangly bits!" The flashlight disappeared back into her mane as suddenly as it had appeared, and she darted back into her seat. "But I figured that if you were gonna pretend you were a mare and stuff it must be a secret, so I didn't say anything to anypony!"

I sat there for a moment, just trying to process her words while the others stared at her, rubbing their heads in a mix of confusion and hesitation in how to deal with the news.

"Wait, how do you know what stallion bits feel like?" Rainbow asked suddenly, breaking the silence.

"Oh, Dashie!" Pinkie said, sitting up straight and running a hoof through her mane. "A lady never kisses and tells! Most uncouth!" she said, her tone and posture almost a perfect mimicry of Rarity.

I spoke up before Rarity could be insulted by Pinkie's vague mockery of her. It was all in good fun anyways, and I'm sure she knew that.

"Yes, it is a secret. An important one that I'd appreciate none of you telling anypony else about," I said, looking each of them in the eyes. "I'm serious about this. Fluttershy convinced me to tell all of you because there's a good chance one of you would've found out at some point anyways, so I'm..." I muttered, twirling the edge of my hoof against the top of the table. "I'm trusting all of you with this."

"What's the big deal though?" Rainbow said, taking to the air and lazily flying on her back. "So you've got a dick. Why hide it?"

"Is that a bad word for penis, Mom?" Spike asked quietly.

"Rainbow Dash, language! Child in the room, sheesh!" I chided, frowning a little.

"This secret is more important than any of you likely realize," Rarity suddenly stated, finishing off her tea. "The nobility can be very picky about such things."

"What? Somethin' wrong with bein' a hermaphrodite?" AJ asked, looking down to her tea, which was now a little bit cold. She shrugged and slid it aside.

"Times are changing, but nobles can be very old-fashioned. They prefer things to fit certain criteria, and Twilight is well outside of their criteria," Rarity explained, looking to me with a sad smile. "You've been hiding it since you were a little foal, haven't you?"

"My parents had me in suits since I was four, and foal clothes before that. I've always been Lady Sparkle."

"That don't explain much." AJ chimed in.

Rarity cleared her throat. "If she had been open with her gender, the majority of the nobility would have shunned her. A small minority have more open minds, but for the most part, being a hermaphrodite is viewed as being unnatural. Can you imagine being spoken of in such ways and treated as such your entire life, Applejack?"

"Ah guess I see your point, but then...it still don't sit well with me. Seems real dishonest. Like lyin' yer entire life."

"Yes, well, even I acknowledge that there are some aspects to the nobility that I simply cannot abide." Rarity looked over to me and smiled a little. "Who else knows about your secret, darling?"

"Princess Cadance knows, and Princess Celestia found out in a rather embarrassing way, along with her assistant Swirling Breeze," I muttered, glancing over towards the windows before looking back to all of them. "I need you all to promise me you won't speak a word of this to anypony. Please."

They all looked at each other for a moment. It didn't take more than a few seconds for Rainbow Dash to land back on her cushion and wave it off.

"Pssh! So what if you're packin' heat? Still," she said, rubbing the back of her head. "A mare with both parts. That's...huh. Never really thought about that before. Dunno how I feel about it yet."

"Same here," Applejack said, removing her hat to scratch the top of her head. "But, yer secret's safe with me, sugarcube. T'ain't proper, goin' 'round talkin' about someone's bits like that. That's your business, and yours alone."

"Oh, um," Fluttershy quietly whispered, smiling over at me. "You know I won't say anything to anyone either."

"Indeed! Some may accuse me of being a gossip," Rarity said, hmph'ing and sticking her snout in the air. "But this is one juicy secret I will have to take to the grave with me. I swear that I will not tell a soul."

"Duh! Now we need to all make it official!" Pinkie shouted, grinning and pointing to them all. "It's time for a Pinkie Promise from each of us!"

Just like that, without missing a beat, they all went through the motions as if they were practiced thousands of times before. Pinkie really got around with those Pinkie Promises, I guessed. Even Spike got in on the action, though his was a bit delayed from him trying to just copy the others after the fact.

I simply looked back and forth between each of them...and I laughed. I laughed so hard at the absurdity of just how simple and easy it all was. I laughed at how good it felt to actually feel like I had ponies I could trust with a secret that, if ever it got out, could actually ruin my entire life as a noble.

I laughed at how horrible it was that the rest of the world was not like Ponyville.

It felt like a weight had been lifted, at least somewhat. A weight I never knew was there to begin with. Now, having become all too aware of it, I felt it pushing down on me, crushing me, whereas before it had just been natural, like a reflex to hold it up on my own four hooves. Now I had five mares cradling that weight alongside me, and it felt good.

I bid each of them goodbye as they headed back to their respective jobs, and then went upstairs with Spike to finish getting our things packed. I needed to get back home. I had work to do...but first, I tracked down my cigar case, polished clean and left sitting on my bed, and took a moment to have a little smoke break on the library balcony before putting the partially-smoked cigar out and securing it in the case once more. I'd been yearning for one of those since yesterday, and the desire would not be denied.

On our way to the train station, I stopped and picked up one of those comic books Spike loved so much from a local book store. I didn't even have it in me to be mad at him for blurting out my secret earlier. I felt good! He certainly felt good too on the train ride back, when I let him read it. Some comic series called Meadmare the Tribal he'd taken a more recent interest in.

Either way, I was glad to be on my way back to Canterlot. I had work to do, and it started with Celestia.

Author's Note

Man, this week's been a heck of a rollercoaster, and I don't think I'm off the ride just yet.

In any case, here's the new chapter readers! Hope you enjoy.

Chapter 13 - Lying Beast

written by Fire Soul

It didn't take all that long to get back to Canterlot, really. Not from Ponyville. Maybe an hour's ride at the most, depending on the pace being set by the workers pulling the train. I understand the logic behind it, but I wonder who came up with the idea of putting living ponies in front of a huge, heavy machine of steel and fire? Sounds like one of those dangerous risks that automatically trumps all the benefits if you ask me. I mean all one of 'em would need to do is trip, and...yeah.

Anyway, it was around one in the afternoon when we arrived, but we barely had a chance to take ten steps off of the train platform before a royal messenger arrived to deliver a letter to me. I think he was waiting there for me to show up. The letter itself was a sealed scroll with the royal mark on it, so I could only assume it was from Celestia. Luna certainly hadn't been around long enough to get her own royal seal, and I doubt she'd use her sister's cutie mark if she had.

The message was simple enough: drop Spike off at home, and then go to see her. She and I needed to talk. That gave me chills. This was something she couldn't just wait to talk to me about, which probably meant that she'd either found something that was alarming to her...or she'd looked into me and found nothing anywhere, which was even worse. I cleaned up my worst offenses, but I left some things out there. Something that would seem less suspicious than nothing at all. Like I said before, I wasn't stupid about this.

That, however, did not stop others from tampering with my files somewhere out there in the world, or worse, having me convicted of something I've never done before. Something horrible, like pony trafficking and yes, you can be sure as shit that that still happens. You just need to shine a light in the darker corners of Equestria to spot it. The signs are there. The bigger question is whether the ones in power notice or care. There's good money in it, after all. Someone no one cares about being repurposed while they line their pockets with thousands of bits? I can think of a lot of nobles, guards and even crooked police that'd get in on that action. I even know a few!

The streets were teeming with ponies going to and from their own destinations, conversations taking place while nobles on trips climbed into their carriages or, if they were particularly rich, one of those newer gasoline-powered vehicles the minotaurs make. I personally didn't like those things. They stunk up the big cities with their emissions, and for the same reason I hated cigarettes, I didn't much like having one of them drive near me or past me.

Still, a symbol of status is a symbol of status I guess. For me, it was my cigars. Smoking wasn't exactly something a lot of ponies did, because the habit's pretty expensive. Just puffing on my cigars in public is the equivalent to saying 'I've got so much more money than like ninety percent of Equestria, I can afford to buy Celestia as a hooker for a week.' Well, something like that.

Cigarettes are a bit more popular with the less fortunate population of Equestria, and especially in The Tauron Republic and Griffonstone Empire. You should see the commercials about the 'health benefits of smoking'. Quite frankly they're hilarious in how blatantly they're lying. You'd think the law would step in and stop them from basically saying 'Here, have a burnable death-stick that you inhale into your lungs and poison yourself with! It's good for you and definitely not addictive!' on national television.

Yes, I'm aware that cigars have tobacco in them too. Shut up. I can be a hypocrite all I want. Do as I say, not as I do.

In any case, we made our way back home quickly. Members of the Royal Guard were already there waiting for me, including a few that had taken a liking to Spike and a pair standing in harnesses attached to a smaller carriage. I didn't always leave him at the house with a foalsitter when I went to the castle. Sometimes he got to sit with some of the guards or other spectators in the training grounds and watch me spar with them. It's only natural that at least a couple of them would warm up to him.

Celestia really did think of everything when it came to stuff like this. Whatever she wanted to talk to me about was an urgent matter in her mind, and without a foalsitter guaranteed to be on-call at the moment and Cadance being all the way in Cloudsdale still, she wanted to be sure that Spike wouldn't be left home alone.

I gave the two guards that had been sent simple instructions. You know, keep an eye on him, make sure he doesn't get into the ice cream or the gems or gem dust, if I'm not back in an hour there should be something quick you could throw in the microwave in the kitchen somewhere, that sort of stuff. I couldn't really dawdle around and give them instructions right down to the letter.

With that, I was out once more and in the carriage provided. I had it in my mind to walk to the castle, but she had decided to simply offer me a ride through her soldiers. I wasn't complaining. It had been a trying couple of days, and the less strain on my bad hindleg the better.

The minor interactions with the guards at the front gate weren't all that important. Damascus was his usual self though. I'll talk about him some other time. He's a lady's stallion and knows he can't get into my pants, but that doesn't stop him from playfully trying to every time we interact. He's the kind of guy I'd gladly have a drink with pretty much any day of the week.

Anyway, I knew where to go. While I've been in Celestia's chambers on a number of occasions, most of the time she and I met in her lounge, if only because her chambers were hers and no one else's. Pictures of long-dead lovers, belongings preserved from thousands of years prior...numerous things like that. Things that were important to her, beyond her duties to Equestria. They weren't things you left out where businessponies, foreign diplomats and the like might see and ask questions about.

Admittedly I didn't see the issue with it, but as I stepped into the lounge once more, and the doors closed behind me, all thoughts of such things left me. They no longer mattered compared to the dread I felt when I looked at numerous folders laid out on the table where she and I normally have our tea.

She was sitting at the opposite side of the room, looking out from the partially opened balcony into the courtyard below. The design of the castle allowed for a rather large garden to be built in the middle of it, and the lounge was one of the rooms located on the inside of the castle's walls, giving it a beautiful view of a vast majority of what was already a massive garden. It even had a hedge maze that spanned miles, along with being enchanted to be deliberately confusing even if you try to map it out in your head. You go in, you're supposed to get lost in it for several minutes, then find your way back out.

"I do so dislike dancing this dance."

I forced my nerves to steady themselves while I approached the table. "Why, because it's me?"

"No," she said, slowly shaking her head while turning around, approaching the table as well. "Because if this is the dance I have to partake in, it means that someone with the power to influence my country from within has made a terrible mistake, or worse."

"Then don't dance. No one's forcing you to." I muttered, shivering as I saw my name on several of the documents once I reached the table.

"Unfortunately, because of the position I'm in, I must insist," she said to me, cracking a weak, half-hearted smile before sitting down on her side of the table. "Take a seat."

I moved to slowly sit down, looking across the table at some of the papers. "I asked you not to do this."

"You admitted to committing murder," she said without missing a beat, staring at me forlornly. "As I said before, I must insist."

"I only killed ponies that deserved it. Intentionally, that is."

I never thought I'd actually feel bad about Celestia giving me a disappointed look. Sure enough, I found myself sulking a little when she glared at me. Maybe that was what Spike felt like when I scolded him for doing something he knew he wasn't supposed to be doing.

She sighed and looked down at the table, glancing over the papers. "No one deserves death, Twilight."

I just...I sat there and stared at her for a moment. I stared in disbelief at what I'd just heard. I actually couldn't believe what had just come out of her muzzle.

"...Wow," I muttered breathily, blinking a few times. "I never thought I'd hear something so naive from you."

The look she gave me was a mix of confusion and surprise, if I remember correctly. I wonder if anyone had ever called her naive before? She really was, and I couldn't honestly be sure of why she would think in such a way. After living such a long time, how could she?

She regained her composure quickly. "I am thousands of years your senior. You have no right to call me naive."

"So a child rapist destroys the innocence and purity of some five-year-old, and he's caught. He doesn't deserve to die?" I asked, tilting my head a little.

"No. He deserves a chance at redemption. Psychiatric help, and time in prison." she responded without batting an eye.

"Okay. So one day he's released and 'reformed' according to the doctors in charge of him," I said, leaning on the table a little, one foreleg resting against it. "Then mere hours after his release, he captures and rapes three little fillies. Then he kills them so they can't tell anyone what happened to them. He learned from the last time he was caught."

She narrowed her eyes and actually snorted at me. How undignified.

I sat up a little and took a deep breath. "What would you think then? What would you say to their families if you knew? If you had just executed him...three foals would be alive and well. Their innocence intact, their lives untainted."

"There's no way to truly know what's going on in a crazy pony's mind. The doctors failed in their job," she said slowly, shaking her head. "You cannot blame the law for failing to execute someone if help is available and those in charge of making sure that help takes root fail in their job."

I knew she was lying. I knew that she knew she was lying. There were ways. Invasive, potentially scarring ways to look into the minds of others. I chose to avoid the topic entirely, for fear of her questioning how I would know anything about the subject in the first place.

"So instead it's better to risk such a thing happening? After the wars you've fought in recorded history, I'd have thought you'd take this lesson to heart," I said, smirking just a little. "When you have your enemy cornered, give them no quarter. If you do, they will come back wiser, more cautious, and far more dangerous."

"Is that what the mentally ill are to you, Twilight? Enemies to be exterminated?"

"Only the ones that wantonly kill innocent ponies, the ones that extort family businesses and drive them into poverty," I growled, clenching my teeth. "Ones that ruin the lives of ponies and present a legitimate threat to everypony else in the world."

"Where do you draw that line then? No one is completely innocent, no one is perfect. Who decides where that line is drawn?" she asked me, and I frowned at that. "You? Me? One of the guards standing outside this room? Who, Twilight? Who?"

"The better question is, who drew the current lines in the first place? Maybe we should get a group like that together again so they can re-evaluate the wisdom of those that came up with those laws to begin with," I muttered. "Banning the death penalty was one of the worst decisions you've ever made."

"So I have been told, on numerous occasions," she sighed out, glancing down at my papers again. "But we are not here to discuss morality and ethics. We are here to discuss you."

"But you-!"

"Twilight," she said softly, frowning a little. "For what it's worth, and this does not leave this room...I don't entirely disagree with you. Neither of us is entirely right, or entirely wrong. Our society simply hasn't found that answer we need to fill the gaps in our legal system yet. I don't believe Equestria has grown enough to find it yet."

I exhaled slowly and tried to do my best to cool my head. This was a subject that I was actually pretty passionate about, to the surprise of several peers that I talked with. If the law were more strict, maybe the Mafia wouldn't be able to exploit it so easily and weave around it like rats in the shadows!

She shuffled several papers, before coming to a stop at one of them and setting it down in front of me. "The police report of the home invasion when you were six. No signs of forced entry through any potential entrances in the house, not even a broken lock. No broken windows, no nothing. Yet, they shot your Father in the knees, your Mother in her flank, and one of them stomped your hindleg into such a mess, it never healed properly. Nothing was stolen. Am I reading all of this correctly?"

"Yes. A home invasion gone wrong." I muttered, the muscles in my body tensing as she looked at me once more.

"I find it strange that they would simply leave after inflicting such injuries upon your family. Surely none of you could fight them off so well in the state you all were in?" she asked quietly.

I could tell that she didn't enjoy doing this to me. I knew that she hated doing this. Still...I couldn't help but be angry at her. I told her to wait until I was ready to talk about this. I gave her the benefit of the doubt yesterday, now she throws it in my face not even a full day later!

"My parents are unicorns. It's not hard to throw furniture."

"According to pictures taken of the foyer," she said, using her magic to slide several black-and-white photos out in front of me. "No furniture was overturned. No bullets had missed their mark, and there was no blood sprayed anywhere. Neither your Father or your Mother are trained in magical combat. At best, they could throw the intruders around, but there would be signs of such a thing. Furthermore, one of the intruders was a unicorn. The lingering magic signature the police found confirms this, though they could not identify who it belonged to."

I watched her stand up and step back from the table, her magic levitating multiple papers up for her to read over while I ground one of my forehooves into the edge of the table, my temper beginning to get the better of me. I felt like I was in a police station, and the interrogator had me dead-to-rights. What would come next? Waterboarding maybe? I've done that before. Fun to do, not so fun to experience. At this point, I wouldn't put it past this royal traitor I called my friend.

"The part that bothers me the most is just how half-hearted this entire investigation was. Your house was kept on a bare minimum of observation for only two days before it was called off, despite the egregious nature of the assault upon you, and your parents. It's almost as if someone didn't want this incident getting any attention," she muttered, her ears twitching a little towards the balcony doors, a sound from outside distracting her only for a moment before she returned her attention to me. "How strange that the Chief of Police suddenly got the bits needed for his vacation to Saddle Arabia right around that time as well."

"Yes. How strange indeed." I muttered, struggling to stop the trembling I was beginning to feel throughout my body. You can't understand how upset I was. You really can't.

She set the papers down, and didn't bother to pick any others up. I don't think the other papers interested her very much. She'd honed in on those from the moment we sat down. I glanced down at the photos for a moment, then back up to her, lightly brushing them aside with a hoof. I had no interest in what they were showing.

Truly, I hated thinking about back then. It made my mind wander to other thoughts automatically. Thoughts like 'What would my life have been like if I'd grown up without getting a taste for killing?' and 'I've been very lonely without my friends. I wonder what they're doing with their lives?' and 'I fucking hate my parents for doing this to me.' You know, the sort of thoughts that make your blood begin to boil. Then you see red and oh geez, where'd this corpse come from and how can I get rid of it without getting caught?!

"This is when it started, isn't it?" she asked me curtly.

"I told you that I would tell you about this one day." I whispered, my voice shaking just a little. It was getting very difficult to restrain myself.

"I'll take that as a 'yes'. How involved is your brother? The Captain of the Guard?" she asked, but even in my current state, I could hear her voice wavering.

"He was never involved. They held his lack of involvement over me as a threat. If I slipped up, they would've gone after him in a heartbeat," I responded in a dull tone, glaring up at her. "I also pushed all of my childhood friends as far away from me as possible, to make sure the risk of them getting involved was reduced."

"What could you have offered them that would stop them from going after your brother?"

"They took me and held a gun to my head," I muttered, my voice trembling a little more. "Told me they'd kill my family if I didn't do what I was told. They gave me a gun. Put some mare in front of me, told me to shoot her in the head. I was only six."

She just stared at me, and the words just came tumbling out of my mouth. I had to keep some semblance of control though. Above all else, I couldn't tell her the complete truth. I knew that even through all of my anger.

"So I pulled the trigger! I kept doing it, and they made me do it over and over and over, almost every day! When they didn't have me doing that, they had me carrying letters between businesses they owned," I continued, my forehooves pressing down on the top of the edge of the table. "But what they really wanted me for? They wanted me for my ability to comprehend magic so easily!"

I laughed and reached up to brush my mane back, staring up at the ceiling. "They wanted me to make magic even their dumbest of goons could understand, but when they realized that I'd taken a liking to all the killing they made me do, they had me do...other things."

I heard her take a steadying breath. "What...what were those other thi-"

"No!" I suddenly shouted, slamming my forehooves down on my side of the table. "You don't get to ask questions anymore! It's my turn now."

I clenched my eyes shut, and I felt a tear trickle out of the corner of my eye. When had that gotten there? I focused on my breathing to try to steady myself and calm down, but it wasn't working all that well. I was thoroughly triggered, and I already knew what I'd have to do to really get rid of this...this urge I had deep down.

"How aware are you of your own faults, Celestia? Because I'm very aware of mine," I said slowly, feeling my throat quiver as the urge to sob rose up within me. "I'm a murderer. I smoke cigars. I have trouble trusting others, and oh, I thought I was bad about that but you take the fucking cake!"

Apparently I'd hit her right where it mattered, because she stared at me with this hurt look in her eyes, and fuck me, but I relished it at the time. I wanted to hurt her, wound her in some way, and I didn't really care how at the time. All that mattered was that I was upsetting her, and I wasn't finished digging in to my metaphorical feast.

"You couldn't even trust me. Me, of all ponies! No, you just took me on as your student and groomed me like a-a fucking pet project!" I shouted at her. "You couldn't even trust me enough to tell me what was going on when the fate of Equestria was in the balance, and I gave you a pass on it! I let bygones be bygones! I rolled with it!"

I actually hopped up on the table. I don't know what compelled me to do it, but I just looked at those papers again and I had the strongest of urges to mess them up. I get a lot of strange urges when I get like this, and believe me, it's rare that I've ever actually wound up all twisted inside like I was in that moment.

I stomped my way across the table and kicked the numerous folders and papers off of it as I approached her, paying no mind to them all fluttering through the air and falling oh-so-slowly to the floor. I didn't care about the papers compared to the big white, pastel-maned alicorn staring at me in surprise, and even some slight measure of fear. Likely not fear of what I could do to her, but of the fact that she'd never seen this side of me before. I've been told the way my eyes get is terrifying.

I pointed my hoof in her face, clenching my teeth. "I gave you the benefit of the doubt, and it's like you couldn't wait to just throw it in my face!"

"T-Twilight, I-"

"I believe I said it was my turn now!" I roared at her, stomping the hoof I had been pointing at her face down onto the table. "You shut your mouth and you listen!"

You have no idea how satisfying it is to see her mouth hang open for only a second before suddenly clamping shut. I wonder how long it had been since anyone had ever, and I mean ever, talked to her this way? Someone needed to, and they needed to do it more often.

"I told you that I would tell you when I was ready. One would think that that would communicate that I'm asking you to drop the issue, but no, you couldn't do that," I muttered, my breathing heavy as I restrained the urge to punch her square in her face. "You couldn't even wait a single day! The moment I get back here, you've dug up who knows how much of my past, a past that I said I wanted to leave behind."

She scowled at me, but I could see her eyes glossing over with unshed tears. "You admitted to murder!"

"Yes! I did! I also recall you mentioning something along the lines of me proving I'm beyond the pony I used to be! But that was just you playing me like a fiddle again, wasn't it?" I said with a wide grin...that disappeared as quickly as it came.

"No, you know what? Fuck you. Fuck. You."

I turned sharply and hopped off the table, walking around it and making a beeline for the door. "I am formally requesting an indefinite break from my studies under you. I will come back when I feel like I can trust you to be square with me."

She didn't answer me. I could hear her voice hitching whenever she tried, and I knew she was on the verge of crying. I didn't even feel bad about it.

Finally, she found her voice. "R-request...granted, my s-s-student."

With that, I firmly banged my hoof against the door twice, and the guards outside pushed the thick, soundproofed door open so I could leave. I looked back, and the last thing I saw was Celestia collecting all of the papers she'd found on me in her magic, and setting them on fire in the air above her. I left without a word, the guards looking at me in confusion for a moment. No doubt because of the scowl I had on my face as I left.

Oh, I was mad. I was beyond mad, I was furious. How dare she? How fucking dare she?!

I barely noticed as I power-walked out of the castle and took the same carriage back home. All I could think about was how much I wanted to hurt her...because she so willingly chose to hurt me.

I did at least treat the guards with a certain level of respect once we got back to my house and I'd cooled my head a little. That fire in my chest had died down enough that I could feel all the underlying emotions hidden away by it, and I regained some semblance of control over myself. I was still shaking, but I did have the mind to thank them for watching Spike and calmly dismissing them so they could return to their duties.

I turned to Spike once they were gone, the little dragon busy tucking some playing cards back into their small box. I quirked a brow at that and walked over to him, noticing two shiny bits sitting on the table in front of him.

"Where'd you get those from?"

He looked up at me, then grinned. "They taught me how to play Poker!" he said with a toothy grin, picking the bits up and holding them up in the air to show them off. "I won two bits for playing good!"

See, this is the sort of thing that no one prepares you for. No parent sits you down and tells you how to deal with your foreign-species future son learning how to play a gambler's game, nor do they tell you how exactly you should handle it based on your child's personality. Not to mention I wasn't in the mindset to give that sort of thing much thought at the time.

"Well, good for you!" I said with a half-hearted smile, gently stroking a hoof over the spines on his head.

He just laughed at that and looked at his two bits, licking his lips. "Can I buy some candy with 'em Mom? Please?"

I slowly nodded to that. "Sure, hun. I'll take you out to get some candy tomorrow. I need to do some shopping anyways."

He jumped a little in his excitement, but as he stared up at me, his smile faded. "Are you okay, Mom?"

"Hm? Of course. Why do you think there's something wrong?"

"You just look rilly sad," he said, fidgeting a little. "Can I help?"

"Aw, honey..." I muttered, slowly laying down next to him and holding a foreleg out towards him. "C'mere."

He quickly put his bits back on the table and practically ran right into my embrace. It's one thing to hug another pony, but there's something special to me about getting a hug from Spike. His body is remarkably warm for a reptilian creature, and he really puts his all into it. He's a very loving little guy.

I felt his arms curl around my neck while I curled my extended foreleg around his back, pulling him close while his claws pulled against the back of my neck and hugged me tighter. I rested my chin on top of his head, and as we stayed there in silence, I slowly rocked back and forth with him in my grasp, humming the tune of a recent bit of music that had come out that we both liked listening to.

His hugs were always the best, but I'd learned a while back that even he couldn't help me with this. It wasn't just about Celestia, or the numerous feelings I had regarding what she'd done. She had every reason to, and I knew that she had to, but...I couldn't help feeling the way I did. I felt several things, now that the rage had died down. Remorse, guilt...but the anger was still there. It wasn't going away. It never went away. No amount of adorable hugs would ever change that.

Still...his hugs were very comforting and wonderful. Nothing would ever change that either.

He didn't want to let go of course. He liked hugging me, and I couldn't blame him for that. But, all good things must come to an end. All things decay, as I've learned over the course of my life. Civilizations, living creatures, friendships, and even the comfy adorable hugs of a child that just wants to make you feel better.

"Thanks, Spike," I whispered, slowly letting him go. "I'm going to my study for a while, alright? You remember the rules?"

He stepped back and nodded, smiling a little. "Always knock before I come in?"

"Mmmhmm! I just need a little time to myself. I'll tell you what's got me feeling bad later, before I go out tonight," I said, standing up and flexing my bad hindleg a couple times to work a kink out of my ankle joint. "For now, you can watch some TV. Sound good?"

He did, of course, agree. If there's one thing the youth of Equestria love, it's a chance to ignore reality in favor of a fantastical tale woven in the format of a black-and-white movie. I mean hey, even I love a good movie now and then. That one movie star from Appleloosa, Braeburn? Fuckin' stud. Shame he's actually gay. I'd love to take him for a ride, on either end!

Spike had gotten used to me having the occasional night when I just stayed out and didn't come home until the next day. I had a few foalsitters in mind already, even before I reached my little book I kept in my study. I picked up the phone and sat down in my lounge chair, dialing a few numbers and making a few calls before finally getting one of them to watch Spike for the night. It wasn't all that hard to get a few dedicated foalsitters for him, considering I paid well. Especially for the overnight foalsitting jobs.

Now, some might say I'm a bad Mother for doing that to my kid. I say it'd be even worse if I just kept bringing random ponies back to the house, and let him see me haul them off to my room where he would probably get curious about the banging and crashing and very, very loud cries and moans. Besides...I had other things on my mind besides getting some tail.

I knew I wasn't mentally in a good place. I'll admit that wholeheartedly. That didn't stop me from making arguably bad decisions. I'm a grown mare, I can fuck up all I want. All I care about is whether my fuck-ups will influence Spike in any way.

But, it would be a couple hours before I was ready to head out for the evening. So, I tried to occupy myself with a book, but that anger...I just couldn't sit still. Then again, even keeping active wouldn't help me, but it would at least prove to be a better distraction. I set the book aside and went into some normal push-ups, just a warm-up before I got into what I usually did to really keep my forelegs nice and strong.

My study isn't just a study in the true sense of the word. It isn't a chair, a fireplace, some eclectic antiques and a fireplace. Well, it's not just that. There's one corner I've dedicated to my physical fitness, including keeping my boxing skills fresh in my mind and my body. I had weights, civilian-grade magic dampeners I can fit on my horn to really work on my focus and test the strength of my horn, and of course, a punching bag. Not one of those newer ones, just a sand-filled one. Not good for minotaurs to train on, but it's fine for my harder hooves.

I went through the familiar motions, removing my clothes and folding them up, setting them down on the arm of my lounge chair before approaching the punching bag, raising up onto my hindlegs and getting myself into a proper stance. I knew why I was angry. I knew the source of the fire inside me. This wasn't going to make it go away by any means, but it would at least help me let off some steam.

I pictured Celestia's face, and my body did the rest.

Weave left, weave right, imagine the punches at my vital areas and guard them, pick my shots and throw my body into them. Ribs, liver, jaw, I'd always trained in private to fight as if my goal was to kill. Not simply to box and win through skill and perseverance, but to win by making sure they go down and stay down forever. Go for the throat, collapse their trachea, make their ribs shatter, whatever it takes. Boxing was just a way to give my will to kill a solid, efficient shape.

Sometimes though? Sometimes you're just so angry, you need to break something. You need to kill something. I was at that latter stage. Even as I began to lose my form and I simply began to wail on the bag, it did nothing to help sate my anger. It only urged me to swing harder, and harder, and harder!

I didn't even notice I was crying until I finally stopped to catch my breath and wipe the sweat off of my face. All I'd done was make the fire worse, and I almost couldn't wait until that foalsitter showed up. I grabbed one of the towels I kept next to the weights and wiped my face down, sniffling a little and slowly slumping down with my back against the wall, taking some deep breaths to try to calm myself down again. Just one more hour, and that foalsitter would be here, and I could get to work....

A series of knocks sounded off from the door, and I cracked a smile. "C'mon in, Spike!"

He pushed open the door with a twist of the knob, the little guy waddling in with a cup of water in his hand. At first I assumed it was just his, and he was coming up because his show was over, but when he offered it to me, I took it and I realized just how thirsty I'd gotten, over the last hour. I hadn't taken a moment to get something to drink, and I'm not talking about the fine wines I have locked up in a display case on the other side of the room. I mean something to actually hydrate myself.

I greedily drank down the contents of the glass, licking my lips once I was finished and setting it aside while Spike stood there, his arms behind his back while he twiddled one of his toe-claws against the carpeted floor.

I smiled over at him and patted his head. "Thanks, hun."

He grinned at that. "I came up earlier, but you sounded really really mad, so I thought I should come back later," he said, frowning a little. "Why are you mad?"

I sighed a little at that and tilted my head back, resting it against the wall. "Celestia and I had a pretty bad argument, and I said some bad things to her...and we aren't really talking to each other anymore. At least for a while."

He frowned at that. "Oh," he said quietly, tilting his head a little. "Why don't you apologize?"

"It's not quite that simple, honey," I muttered, sniffling a little. "We both said some bad things."

"But if you apologize, she'll apologize too, right?"

Oh, the innocence of youth. It pained me to think that just by me being a noble, he'll one day lose all of that foolish innocence. I wish the world could be as simple as he thought it was.

"Maybe," I said, cracking a weak smile. "She's always been nice at least."

"And she's your friend!" he said, looking for all the world as if he'd 'cracked the case' and he knew something I didn't. "Friends always forgive each other! Right? Even if they were really mean to each other!"

If you'd said something like that to me a long time ago...well, I would've agreed with you. But friends were few and far between for me, as in, I had none at all. I just had associates that knew not to cross me, despite my young age. They knew if they didn't manage to kill me fast, they'd be chopped up and scattered across the city. Probably components of hot dogs served in omnivore restaurants. Point is, a simple rule of friendship like that never would've mattered to me before.

"...Since when did my little dragon get all wise and smart?" I teased, setting the empty glass I had in my hooves down next to myself.

"But you always said I was smart!"

"Because it's true!" I said, holding my hooves out to him. "Now c'mere. Your Mom wants more hugs."

He blech'ed and waved his hands in front of himself. "No way! You're all sweaty and smelly!"

Ah, from the mouths of babes. Just for that, I leaned forward suddenly and ensnared him in my forelegs, pulling him face-first against myself and hugging him tight, smothering him in Mom-sweat and fur. He writhed and pushed against me, his head twisting this way and that before I let up a little, the little dragon eew'ing and pushing back off of me.

"Augh! I'm gonna die, you smell so bad!" he huffed, faking a few coughs.

"Aw, that's a shame. Oh well! I've heard dragon scales sell really well." I teased back, sticking my tongue out at him.

"Nuh-uh! Yer lyin'!"

"Nuh-uh!"

"Yuh-huh!"

"Nuh-uh!"

"Yeah-huh!"

I hmph'ed and snorted a little. "I see my son insists on questioning my honesty," I said, closing my eyes and adopting a more haughty tone. "It appears that I must punish him accordingly."

"Oh no...!" I heard him mutter, just before he began to struggle and climb his way out of my grasp, but I knew what he was up to. I had a good grip on him.

In an instant, I lifted him up and flipped him onto his back, and the nomming commenced. The little guy didn't even have a chance of surviving it. My teeth scraped at the softer scales of his belly, and his cries of squealing laughter echoed through my study, the final death knell of his little life. Poor Spike...we knew ye well.

With that, I hauled my stinky self and my now equally stinky son off to take a bath. I would've taken a shower, but after everything that had happened, I just wanted to spend some quality time with my son, more than I had already. Above all else, he was the perfect distraction from what I was feeling on the inside. He had plenty of toys to play with in the tub, and I was more than willing to play a game of sink-the-battleship with him.

By the time we got out of the nice hot bath, we had only ten minutes before the foalsitter showed up. He and I waited in the foyer for her to arrive, a saddlebag hanging from the left side of my body. All I needed were my own bits, a spare set of clothes, some latex covers for my legs, a facemask and some ingenuity tonight. I'd already had an idea of what I intended to do, aside from stopping in at Vinyl's nightclub.

The foalsitter I'd gotten for him tonight was one Shimmer Feather, a pegasus born with a unique genetic 'defect' that caused her feathers to be particularly shiny. It didn't impact her ability to fly at all, as long as she took extra good care of them. Personally I thought it was a nice perk, having extra-shiny, smooth-looking feathers in exchange for requiring more personal upkeep. Who in Canterlot didn't already have ridiculous levels of personal upkeep?

I had opted to wear something distinctly different, as usual. You didn't expect me to go clubbing in my suit, did you? Do you have any idea how expensive it is to get one of my suits properly cleaned every time they get dirty? I'm not on the Mafia's payroll anymore, that shit ain't a drop in the bucket! Someone spills their drink or pukes on me, that's a hefty sum to get that outfit cleaned!

I kept more casual clothes for occasions like this. Clothes I could throw into the laundry machine when I got home, clothes I didn't have to spend a horn and a foreleg to get washed...clothes I could afford to burn if need be, if you catch my drift. I had a spare set of clothes as a just-in-case.

As it stood, what I had on at the moment was so beneath my station that if a journalist saw me, they wouldn't be able to help themselves. Out would come the camera, snap-snap-snap goes the shutter, and onto the front page of a tabloid magazine I go, or at least the fifth or sixth page. Not that that doesn't happen occasionally as-is, I don't make a constant habit of going out. It's kinda old news that Twilight Sparkle likes to go out and party sometimes. I catch some flak from the other nobles for it, but overall, they don't have anything to complain about. I'm just a young mare supporting one of the newest shapes music's taking, that's all.

Oh, right, I'm wearing a pair of baggy brown sweatpants and a black T-shirt with the image of a newer rock band that had shown up at Vinyl's club a few months back. Their music was pretty rad, so I bought some merch. Even picked up a poster while I was at it. Don't think I ever put it up in my room though...maybe I should've gotten around to that. I think I still haven't gotten around to that! More important things on my mind.

She already knew the rules when it came to Spike, so the moment she had everything settled and in order with me, I was out the door and on my way. My first stop? The airship docks. I had decided on my method already, I just needed to get some rope that no one would truly miss if it disappeared.

The only sticking point to my plan was the issue with my magic at the moment. I had magic I could use, but the rupture in my mana gland made using more powerful magic dangerous, and the inhibitor on my horn encouraged me not to use said magic. It didn't stop me, but it definitely made it much harder to focus, and that meant that I couldn't use another dark magic I was fond of abusing, nor could I rely on my mind magic.

Body modification is exactly what it sounds like, but unlike mind magic, it carries excessive dangers for those it's used on, even if it's used properly. Imagine, if you will, a form of magic that allows you to temporarily alter your body. Change the color of your fur, your eyes, shorten or lengthen your horn, even make you spontaneously build muscle...all that magical miracle stuff. Well, do I have a story for you!

See, there was once a small, humble village of unicorns. They did their thing on a daily basis, but their village was so out-of-the-way, they rarely ever had any visitors. It was remarkably dull there, and a perfect place for a mischievous wizard to conduct a very questionable magic experiment.

One day, said wizard showed up, peddling a new miracle magic that could restore youth to the elderly, give you that perfect body you've always wanted, and all that good snake-oil-salespony bullshit. Someone volunteered to get the spell cast on them, and before they knew it, they were the most handsome stallion in the village, where before they had been stocky, plain and nothing special. Soon, the entire village was hooked on his spell.

Of course, the spell was temporary, but as he practiced it on more and more of the villagers, he refined it, and found ways to make it last longer. Soon, every single villager was stopping in at his established carriage, coming to pay him to 'top off' the spell cast on them, so they could retain their artificial perfection. He became rich off of the town in a matter of weeks.

Then, ponies began to age, and rapidly at that.

The elderly were the first to go. They all began to die off, and the middle-aged unicorns were next, their bodies rapidly aging under the extended influence of the spell. Pregnant mares had miscarriages, stallions went sterile, and soon, the village could no longer sustain itself because everyone was dead or far too old. When they began to panic and go to him for answers, they found he'd already fled the village. In just a few months, the village had been completely abandoned by the occupants that remained.

See, body modification feeds on the subject's magic. Not like, the magic in my mana gland, but the magic that saturates every inch of someone's body. It'll eat all of that up once the magic you used to cast the spell to begin with runs out, and it'll eat that magic up real fast. The effect is universal across species, tests have been done.

That's not to say that that magic doesn't have applications where it's allowed, under strict supervision. You can imagine that it can be useful in physical therapy and medicine. Me? I use it for far more reliable disguises than any illusion could manage. I just make sure that I give myself three to four hours when I use that magic, in case I need to retain the disguise for an extended period of time.

The idea of doing this without a disguise at all? Well, I guess I'd just need to be really careful.

I'd left the house at six o' clock, or at least around six, so I'd have plenty of time to prepare. Slinking my way into the airship docks unseen was the easy part. Not the first time I've done it. Getting the rope was also easy, though I had to slip around some evening dockworkers just getting off their shift.

I coiled the rope up tight and tied it onto the strap of my saddlebag, hiding the rope behind it. It was a bit moldy and old, but it would do. At least it wasn't soaking wet, like it would be if I'd gotten it from a dock at the seaside.

After sneaking back out, I went over what I knew of my target. I'd had him selected for a while now, whenever my urges welled up inside me again. He was a perfectly suitable target to scratch my very special kind of itch.

Charlatan Muse, an older earth pony stallion who did accounting work for the Mafia, alongside letting them use his place as a hideout if necessary. Accused of rape an astonishing twenty-six times by twenty-six different mares, and had foals with two of them. Managed to get custody of his two kids by way of the Mafia threatening the mares and smearing their public image until most of them denied the charges they initially accused him of. All of that just so he wouldn't get sent to prison and wouldn't have to pay child support. Combine all that with a few well-placed bribes and blackmails, and well...you've got a surefire victory in court.

He lived in a large three-bedroom house with his two kids in a decent neighborhood, so I needed to be discreet. I knew his routine well enough to know that he had a very, very early morning job that required him to go to bed at a pretty early time the night before, so either I'd encounter a very tired stallion...or a stallion already asleep in bed.

The only unknown was the kids. Where would they be, when I decided to deal with him? The sun was already setting, and in just a little while I'd have the darkness I needed to properly evaluate the situation before I made any decisive moves. In the meantime, I loitered around at a nearby cafe, enjoying a nice coffee while I waited for the sun to fully set.

I was used to staking out my targets. I couldn't afford to slip up, and caution is an assassin's best friend. I had to be absolutely sure this one died, without anyone ever seeing me in the area when his body's discovered. I didn't have the means to chop him up and scatter him around. I wanted this one to be found when I was done.

I found myself in the midst of a conversation with one of the cafe's patrons when I excused myself from the establishment, making up some excuse about needing to get going to get back home, the street lights beginning to flicker on as darkness descended over Canterlot. It was time for me to play my favorite game.

There are two ways to kill someone in my mind: the professional way, or the psychotic way. While I consider myself a consummate professional while I'm on the job, this was more an act of pleasure than anything else. Stress relief. If the rope wasn't obvious enough, I was leaning towards the method that represented slow, cruel death over the quick and, by comparison, painless method.

I left the cafe heading in the direction of the ghetto, but the moment I got the chance, I slipped into an alleyway between two taller buildings and went the long way around and walked back into the neighborhood his home was at. Already, my heart was beginning to beat faster in my chest, and I could feel the anticipation of what was coming growing inside of me. This was the moment. This was where I decided someone else's fate tonight.

I stayed out from under the streetlights as I snuck my way behind several houses, ducking in behind his neighbor's garage and checking the area to make sure there weren't any windows facing me before I opened my saddlebag and took the time to ease the latex socks onto my legs. There was going to be some semblance of struggle from him, and the last thing I needed was my fur getting scraped off for the police to find. Latex isn't the most comfortable thing against fur, but I can deal with it for the time being. I'll take the security of not losing a strand of fur at the cost of my comfort any day.

I peeked my head out to make sure no one was watching. It was close to eight at night, and ponies were starting to return home and head out for the night, but I knew he'd still be at his house. He'd be in bed, and if he's as good a Father as I think he is (see: fucking abysmal), his kids are probably in bed too. They're also probably huddled together reading a comic or playing a game. I'd have to check the windows to be sure.

I slinked around the outside of the house, my ears perked up, swiveling this way and that, listening for the sound of anyone else, any carriages passing by, any unexpected animals that might have a few loud barks to send my way, or just gnaw on my legs if they decide to go straight for violence. Nothing so far. I peeked into the living room first, making a quick job of it before slipping around one side of the building. He had a fence and hedges around his house. I assumed he wanted his privacy to be as secured as possible, no neighbors able to peek into his house through his windows. Shame he forgot to put that fence around the front of his house...and that gate in the back didn't even have a lock on it.

No one was in the living room. The house was dark. The windows had the most basic of magic security on them, and all of my prior investigations of him didn't find any of that fancy electronic security crap the griffons came up with. From what I knew, I'd be fine slipping through one of the windows, if necessary. I could disable the security with ease, if I removed the inhibitor ring on my horn. I'd probably have to do that a couple times to pull this off without too much risk of detection.

I made my way around the left side and peeked into a bathroom window, which had curtains drawn. Sensible. The next room I found was his, but I couldn't go in there just yet. I needed to find out where those kids were. I had absolutely zero intention of harming them, for any reason, and them stumbling in on us would be bad for all parties involved. If they weren't settled in and I couldn't be reasonably sure that they wouldn't catch me in the act, I'd just have to wait.

As I made my way around the back, I found the back door to the house locked, but that could be dealt with just fine. I could see that it led into the house's kitchen, and it had tiled floors. Good thing I had those latex socks on, they helped to muffle your hoofsteps, long as you walked a certain way and you're careful about how your hoof hits the floor.

Around the right side of the house, I found the bedroom where the kids were at. One of them was sound asleep, and he looked fairly young. Maybe around Spike's age. The sibling was a filly, but she wasn't in bed. I could barely make her out in the corner, curled in on herself. She had a nasty bruise on her cheek, and her eyes were shut, her body surrounded by numerous plush toys. I suppose they were her comfort, after getting hit by her Father.

Welp. Now I had another reason to thoroughly enjoy killing him.

Okay, so the kids were asleep. I could work with that. I just needed to make sure this upcoming altercation didn't get too loud and wild. Even if it did, I just needed to lock that door to keep them out. They could run to get help, but I'd be done and gone before anypony showed up, of that I was sure. With my cutie mark covered and a facemask to hide my visage, I was confident I could pull this off without a hitch.

I went for the back door and looked over the magic security placed on it. Simple enough, easy to get through. I'd just need to remove the inhibitor on my horn for a short time, and put it back on before the rupture in my mana gland began to leak magic into my brain again.

I took a few breaths to gather my focus, then yanked the ring off my horn, immediately going to work on the lock. I felt the magic shift around in the tumbler, toying with the enchanted metal on the inside, worming into it and undoing it so it wouldn't trigger when I unlocked the door. Once that was done, it was trivial to unlock the locks and slip into the house undetected.

The smell of trash reached my nose and I recoiled a little. There were three bags of trash in the corner of the kitchen, far out of the way. No one had taken them out yet. There were unwashed dishes in the sink, and stained silverware sitting on the kitchen counter. Blech. If you're so lazy you can't even clean up after yourself, at least have the decency to use plastic utensils or something!

I put the inhibitor ring back on my horn and reached back to pull my facemask out of my saddlebag, quickly tugging it onto my head and tucking as much of my mane into it as I could. Uncomfy, sure, but once again I can deal with that. I quietly made my way through the house, my senses on high alert. This was a very sensitive position to be in. If I woke those kids now, I'd have to run and I'd have to run fast. If I woke Charlatan up, I'd also have to run, but there would also be a risk of him seeing my fur color or my tail and identifying me based on that.

A part of me screamed for me to turn around and go back out the door, lock it and never go back, but I knew how this went. There was always a moral part of me that told me I didn't need to do this. I shouldn't give up hope of finding another way. But no...this was always how that story ended. Someone would be dead, and I would enjoy it and be completely unrepentant about it. Period. End of story. I might repeat it ad infinitum for the rest of my life, but it will always have the same introduction, body and conclusion.

I walked slowly, carefully down the hallway, thankful for the carpeted floors of the rest of the house. That made my concerns about creaky wooden floors null and void, though creaks were always a risk. Chances were that the kids would just think I'm him, and I highly doubt the filly would come to take a look-see.

When I stood outside of his room, I gently pressed my ear against the door to see if he'd woken up for any reason. Nothing. Just a quiet snoring from the other side. I felt my insides trembling with the fear of being caught in the act while I reached for the doorknob, alongside the burning urge pushing me forward. It was almost time...almost time to turn him into my prey.

You can't imagine how this feels. You're probably not a psychopath like I am. The closest I can come to explaining it is like an addiction of the flesh, one that can only be satisfied in a specific and violent way. The pony who sates my urge will be dead by the time I'm done, and I won't have any regrets. I'll have quelled the fire within.

It'd been far too long. I was in withdrawal, and I needed my fix!

I normally have better self-control than this, but Celestia really set me off. I didn't entirely understand until I spoke to Spike, but the answer was simple. I trusted her. She was my friend. She was easily the pony closest to me, and she stabbed me in the back on top of manipulating me. That hurt me more than I realized back then. Now someone else was going to pay for her betrayals.

The knob turned with a light click, and I winced at the sound. I inched the door open, and peeked inside, just listening in the silence of the night to see if I'd woken him up. He didn't so much as shift around. I eased the door open slowly and stepped into the room. Even the sound of the bottom of the door brushing over the carpet seemed loud to me in that moment, but that was why I did it very slowly.

He laid there sleeping so peacefully...I wondered what it would have looked like, to someone that knew my true nature in moments like this. Would they see a predator, wearing a pony's skin, standing over another pony, ready to pounce? Would they simply see a nutjob youth taking her anger out on someone else in the worst way possible? Probably a little bit of both. I'm pretty sure I'm both, if you ask me. Very much insane.

I gently, very gently closed the door, and took my time in turning the lock in the doorknob, the dull click barely audible as it slid into position. I turned to look over at the bed, then examined the rest of the room. There wasn't much to say about it unfortunately, nothing I could use to really spice this up. Just a thick wooden desk, a bookshelf, and a closet full of things I didn't much feel like risking sifting through. I already had enough to work with.

His bed was tucked in against one corner of the room, a double bed, with the headboard facing the door I'd just walked in through. I walked around to the other end of it and removed the rope from the strap on my saddlebag, measuring out exactly how much I'd need to do what I had planned. Once I'd measured it out, I removed the ring on my horn and cut the rope off at the desired length, and tied one end to the frame of the bed on the end of it, and tied a noose on the other end.

He was laying on his front with his head facing his headboard, a pillow tucked under his chin. He didn't deserve even that small comfort he wallowed in. He shouldn't have won that case, but as always, money spoke in place of justice. Life's not fair that way. It was time for me to rectify that, even if just a little bit.

I put the ring back around my horn and sat there for a moment, mentally preparing myself for the incoming struggle. Also, I needed to let the ring bleed off my magic a little before I did this. I couldn't take chances, not when I was so close to what I so dearly wanted.

I think I sat there for three minutes or so, considering what I was about to do. He would respond instinctively in his hazy, half-awake manner once the noose was around his neck. I'd seen it numerous times. Ponies startled into action will always dart forward on instinct, sometimes breaking into a full-on sprint if they're particularly prone to panicking. It's our natural response to get away from danger. He'll lunge forward, and I'll tighten the noose...and then, he'll be all mine.

I removed the ring on my horn once again, and picked the noose up in my magic, hovering it just over his head. Still, he slept without a care in the world. I couldn't help but grin behind my facemask at how drastically that was going to change in just a moment.

It happened rapid-fire. I picked his chin up and quickly tucked the noose under his chin, the stallion suddenly jolting awake as I yanked the noose as tight as I possibly could. As I predicted, he jumped forward, only to gag himself on the rope around his neck. His back arched in what was probably a very unhealthy way, and that was my moment to jump into action.

I tucked the ring onto my horn once more and swiftly crawled onto the bed, moving over him and firmly seating myself on the middle of his back, ducking under the length of rope and letting it strain over my wither. I pressed myself down against him and reached under his forelegs, hooking mine around the front of them and twisting them back, firmly pulling them behind his back before he had a chance to put that beefy earth pony strength to use to resist me.

His hindlegs kicked and thrashed, and he gurgled and struggled against the noose, but already I could feel his panic kicking in. He twisted and tried to throw me off, but he was in no position to make me go anywhere. I was free to do as I pleased with him...so I closed my eyes and focused on the feeling of him squirming in a desperate bid to save his own worthless life. I couldn't see his face clearly after all. Kind of took half the fun out of it.

Oh, but his forelegs were giving me trouble. He was strong, stronger than I anticipated, and the adrenaline flooding his system was doing wonders to give him that raw strength earth ponies were known for. I was having trouble keeping his forelegs pinned against his back, and his panic and desperation were making him buck his hindlegs and twist around far too hard for my liking. It was okay though. That strength wouldn't last too much longer, and it was beyond satisfying to see him flail like a rabbit caught in a hunter's trap.

This was the moment I'd been waiting for. As the seconds ticked by, I felt his body begin to soften up under me, his struggles weakening as his choking, gagging noises began to die down. I turned my head and bit down on the rope, pulling hard on it to make sure I really wringed all the fight out of him. He seemed to flare to life once more, but only for a second, a gurgling 'hrrllggrrnngh' escaping his collapsed throat before he began to go limp once again.

I let go of his forelegs and reached up, coiling my forehooves around the rope...and with a sigh of bliss, I pulled as hard as I could. His head was forced back at an unnatural angle, and I could see his eyes bulging in terror, like he knew that this was it. It was ending right here and now for him, and he had no choice in the matter. His neck bent back much too far for any pony to do on their own, and with one final, glorious pull that I threw all my upper body strength into, there was a sick, muffled wet pop, followed by a couple more, and his head twisted to one side.

His body twitched and spasmed as I snapped his neck, followed by everything just going...still. Completely limp. I looked into his eyes and saw those dilated pupils staring at me for just a fraction of a moment, before rolling back in his skull. There was a final, cut-off gurgle from him before the room went silent, and all that could be heard was my own adrenaline-fueled, exhilarated panting.

I felt so good. So satisfied, so fulfilled, you have no idea! Nothing could ever compare, it was like walking on sunshine! I wanted to get up, dance and scream into the night in utter joy! That would have to wait until I got out of the house and far, far away from the neighborhood though.

In the aftermath of his murder I sat there on top of him, looking down upon my prey with a kind of warm pride inside myself that I took the time to revel in. No one would come to check on him. No one would truly care about his passing except perhaps his family, and his kids if they were stupid enough to believe that daddy gave two shits about them.

When I'd finally drank it all in, I got off of him and left him as he was, head pulled back by the rope, his body sliding down the bed's length a little now that I wasn't keeping him in place anymore with my own weight. I stared at my work for just a moment longer before rolling up the cut-off length of rope and stuffing it into my saddlebag, out of sight.

Getting out of the house was far simpler than sneaking in. I unlocked his door, stepped out, pulled it shut behind myself, and eased my way down the hall, through the kitchen, and out the same door I used to get in. I even locked it behind myself and reset the security before I slinked away, my facemask removed and tucked into my saddlebag, purposely buried under my spare set of clothes.

I made sure to quietly slip away from the neighborhood with as little fuss as possible, though even I won't deny that my excitement ensured that I was walking particularly fast. When I was far enough away, I ducked into an alley and I let all that joy out, hopping around in place and cheering in quieted squeals while I relived the memory of what had just happened in my head.

I could feel his muscles straining, twitching and trying to find a way to get me to let go! It was so exciting, feeling him strain under me, to hear him choke and struggle for breath, to feel him kick and scrape his hooves against his bedsheets. All in vain, when you're dealing with a pro like me. If I want you dead...you're going to die, and you're going to die how I want you to die.

A quiet, happy groan escaped my muzzle as I began removing my latex socks, folding all four of them up and setting them on the ground in the alleyway along with the length of rope I still had and my facemask. I removed the ring on my horn and, with a burst of magic, I set them ablaze, grabbing trash from a nearby trash can to act as more fuel for the flames. I sat there watching my garments burn until there was nothing left identifiable about them, then ran out of the alleyway, pep in my step and a song in my heart.

It didn't even feel like I'd been walking very far when I found myself in a more grungy part of town. Neon signs lit up the night, advertising various services to the enterprising young gentlecolt and/or lady, or simply the curious, from sex toy shops to outright brothels. None of that was what I was here for, however.

Vinyl Scratch was, like many I associate myself with, an enigma of a mare. I'd become something of a distant friend a long time ago, if only because she trusted my advice, way back in the day. Her club wouldn't be up and running if it weren't for my intervention, after all.

However, I never told her to extend her reach over a five-block radius once she was situated either. As I passed by these establishments, I saw stallions in suits everywhere, discreetly staying out of the way while ponies went about their business in the Red District of Canterlot. Guess whose paycheck they were on?

Prostitution wasn't illegal as long as you registered your, ahem, 'profession' and stuck to a very steady, rigorous schedule of weekly health check-ups. We may have magic to deal with various types of normally incurable virus-based diseases, but we still didn't want stuff like that just spreading around willy-nilly.

Vinyl didn't seem to have a problem with this either. She's very much a free spirit, and she shows it in her art, but once she had all that money...she did more with it than I've ever seen most nobles do with their millions. She got in contact with the houses of ill repute around here, all the small businesses, and worked out her own deals with them.

Fast-forward a few years, and you don't have prostitutes wandering the streets of this area. Oddly enough, the Red District was tasteful, for the Red District I mean. Sure, you had neon signs that were a bit provocative, but if you decided to browse their wares, it was your choice. You didn't just walk through and see like four mares winking their pussies at you and asking if you want to have a good time.

At the very center was a particularly large building, the heavy bass of thrumming music from within thumping in the air around it while young ponies around my age loitered in the street and on the sidewalks, chatting it up and getting in line to be let into the club. Me, I could've gone around and been let in the side door where the bands and other DJs get let in, but I wasn't here tonight to visit with Vinyl and her squeeze. I was here to party.

Fortunately, the bouncers at the entrance knew me. I didn't have to wait in line regardless of whether I used the back entrance or not.

This club was one of those things that stuck out in Canterlot, partially because of the owner, but also because of what it embodies. You go anywhere else in Canterlot, you'll get a nice little mellowed-out place full of ponies chatting and enjoying some swing music, maybe some ska or classical tunes, or Celestia forbid some awful country music that's been played on the radio like a million times over...but Vinyl's club was drastically different. Ahead of its time.

Clubs like this existed in minotaur lands, and even the griffons had something like it, but she took it to a whole new level. She's the kind of pony that comes along once in a lifetime, a natural savant of her art, and she let nothing keep her down on her way to stardom. I partially blame Octavia for that, but that's just conjecture on my part.

She crafted her speakers, her turntable, everything she worked with to make her unique brand of music. The less open-minded call what she does just making noise, but to me, it's music in a purer format. No rhyme or reason, just sound trying to form a beat that grabs the crowd and makes them puppets to her tune. I for one was more than glad to bask in the way that music makes me feel. A lot of younger ponies were these days.

The moment I stepped further inside, I could almost feel the music in the air. As soon as I stepped into the big, open room of the club, I was hit with wave after wave of loud, ear-splitting music that made me recoil only a little. I'd come to expect this sort of thing. Sounded like tonight, the stage belonged to some rock group. Or was it metal? I didn't care either way. It was the kind of music that would really stir the crowd up, and that was exactly what I was looking for to top off the night.

I didn't waste time trying to get into the crowd on my own. It's kinda embarrassing for me actually. I know how to dance at a ball, I know the motions, where to hold a mare or stallion why we danced, buuuut this kind of dancing wasn't really 'dancing'. The kind of dancing those ponies were doing out there encouraged you to just cut loose and let it all out. There was no rigid form to it. Problem for me was, when I do that, I look like an epileptic having a seizure. Yes, someone actually described it to my face as such.

When I dance with someone else though, I can follow their lead. That tends to work out far better for me. So, I went straight for the bar. The club didn't, or at least wasn't supposed to, allow minors in except under very special circumstances, myself being one of them. Now that I was sixteen, I didn't have to worry about those restrictions. When I was younger though, I could only come in under Vinyl's supervision.

She's around five years older than me, in case you were wondering. Just, putting that out there, because it might've been confusing otherwise. No, we've never had sex, and I don't think I'd ever want to...no matter how scrumptious she might be to my senses. That mare is property of Octavia, trademarked and everything. Encroach at your own peril.

I ordered a few drinks and let myself settle in, letting the music drown out everything else and take me away from reality for a while. Ponies were walking around, trying to talk over the loud tunes and thrumming bass filling the air, but for the most part, they were all content to just relax and become one with the crowd. It's the atmosphere the club creates, you see. You aren't an individual for very long here. Unless this just isn't your thing, sooner or later, you'll become one with the crowd. Another body merrily dancing along.

There was a guy I knew here. Drug dealer, dealt in more quality party favors. Normally I wasn't one to indulge, but there was a pretty cute stallion hitting on me, and I was already in such a good mood...fuck it, y'know? Why not? Might as well live a little.

One dose of ecstasy later, and I felt like my own fur was caressing my skin with the most loving of touches, let alone how he was starting to feel me up. I got nice and cozy with this new guy and...mm, well, we went to dance first, but he couldn't keep his hooves off me. I made sure to keep his hooves away from more personal places, but oh, he tried. Sorry buddy, can't have you finding out about my secret~! Not until I'm ready to tamper with your mind, anyways.

I was going to ride the life out of his cock before the night was over, I knew that without a shadow of a doubt. Oh yes...sometimes it just felt good to be bad.

Author's Note

Well, I got this one out pretty damn fast, considering the size! I've been looking forward to getting to this chapter for a while now.

This chapter also marks the very first time Twilight has killed anyone in the story aside from the first time when she was six! Before this, it was mostly her talking about her murdering ponies. Now we get to see just how she gets when she really gets to settle in and enjoy taking someone's life.

As for the music I listened to for this chapter...well.

Interlude I - The Bitter Crown

written by Fire Soul

The doors closed with a thud of finality, and Celestia gazed up at the burning papers held in her magic. Their image blurred, and with a single blink, she felt her heart crumbling to pieces. Tears ran from the corners of her eyes and down her cheeks while she watched the papers burn. Even the folders she'd gotten them in didn't survive the pyre growing in the air above her.

It had hurt so much more than she expected it to. Even as she watched her student fight and struggle to contain herself, she pushed forward, fully expecting Twilight to snap. She just didn't expect it to be quite so explosive. So hateful. So furious.

When the papers were naught but ash she let them drop onto the center of the table unceremoniously, her self-control fading rapidly. She couldn't stop the tears, couldn't stop the trembling of every breath and the sobs she was struggling to suppress. Her head hung over her side of the table and her flowing mane partially fell over her face.

"Find your center. Deep breaths. Do not-"

She saw Twilight's face, inches from her own in her head, and her concentration slipped away from her without even a slim chance of returning. A pained howl of a despairing mare filled the room as the tears ran freely, her emotions running away and dragging her along for the ride, forehooves stamping at the edge of her table in pure frustration at how helpless she truly was in all of this.

Twilight understood. She knew that her student understood why she did what she did. That didn't change the fact that she did it. She couldn't bring herself to wait and sit on the matter. She feared that if she had, she never would've worked up the courage to confront Twilight in the first place.

She wanted to smash the table. She wanted to buck the chair out from under herself and send it flying through the balcony doors...but she restrained herself. Even if she lost control of her emotions, she did not lash out. It was not her way, it was never her way. The ruler of Equestria cannot be seen as unstable.

An errant knock on the door brought her back to reality. "Your majesty?"

She recognized the voice. Swirling Breeze. The mare Twilight had been having a very inappropriate sexual relationship with for several months. Even with that incident, she had manipulated her student. She wanted to see Twilight's maturity. Relationships like that rarely lasted, and if it did last, then good for the two of them. If it didn't...she would have been curious to see how Twilight dealt with it.

Twilight passed with flying colors. Even above and beyond her expectations. No hint of encouraging infidelity from Swirling, they seemed to end things amicably on their own...it was heartwarming for her to witness. More than she expected from the youths of the modern era. Twilight truly was special.

Too special, as it turned out.

She got up from her seat and tried to compose herself, summoning up all her willpower to dam up her eyes and stop the rampant flow. There was little she could do about her running nose, or the quiver in her voice, unfortunately. She had no doubt Swirling Breeze would notice.

It was a slow trek to the door, her magic gently cracking it open just enough to see one of her more dedicated assistants standing there, looking through the opening at her with a concerned half-smile. She did her best to smile back.

"Your majesty I...I came to get you," Swirling said, pausing to take in the Princess's appearance. "Did something happen?"

"Nothing that I cannot deal with," Celestia said quietly, quieter than she would normally speak. "Please, cancel my appointments for the day. I require some time to myself."

A moment passed between them. Celestia, with her half-hearted facade of unbreakable will, and her assistant, who knew her far better than almost any other pony in the world possibly could. Eventually, Swirling Breeze bowed briefly, and dismissed herself. Celestia closed the door as quietly as she could and turned to walk over towards the balcony once more.

She drew the curtains closed over the balcony doors, the light in the room dying down and giving her some semblance of privacy. She felt the weight of her sadness push her down until she was laying on the floor, and she reached up to remove her crown and hold it in front of herself, staring at it with a sense of despair.

"When did you become so heavy?" she whispered, staring into the jewel embedded in the center of it. "So heavy that I cannot even make the moves needed to help ponies when they need my help the most...."

She laid the crown down in front of herself, idly noting that it was more a tiara than a crown. They'd tried to make a crown for her once. They'd even tried to give her the title of Queen. She refused outright. She was no Queen, nor did she desire to be. Yet, despite that, she seemed to get all the responsibilities and downsides to being a monarch, minus most of the benefits.

She felt tired. So very drained. Slowly she laid her head down and stared into the jewel on her tiara, letting out a slow sigh through her nostrils. Once her eyes closed, it only took her a couple minutes to drift off, letting herself rest after such a trying encounter.

Celestia was startled awake by a light tapping on the glass of the balcony door. The gears in her mind quickly began to turn once more, and she stifled a yawn in favor of getting to her hooves faster. There was only one pony that would be brazen enough to try to enter her lounge through the balcony, aside from a member of the Royal Guard, of course. While improper, it wasn't beyond them if they were concerned about her.

She reached out with her magic to ease the curtain aside, and found her sister standing there, a hoof gently tapping on the glass once more.

Luna had cleaned up rather well after waking up with the most royal of hangovers. A keen eye could see that there were bags under her eyes, and given that Luna was quite antiquated in her knowledge, she probably didn't know what aspirin was. That was...unfortunate, to say the least. Not that alicorns needed aspirin to recover from the pains of a hangover, but it helped to give others the image of them being just as normal as anypony else.

Then again, she also hadn't had a chance to sit down and discuss 'being normal' with her sister, so Celestia couldn't help but wonder why Luna was maintaining her own suffering.

Luna felt like warmed-over Tartarus after that drinking contest. She'd gotten so lost in the flavor of the delicious cider given to her, and she'd been so overjoyed to be back, to feel air and being able to hear and taste...and now she was reaping what she'd sown, not that she minded.

Celestia stared at her sister for a moment before unlocking the balcony door, letting her in. Luna's motions were slow and awkward as she struggled to maintain a more dignified posture, but as soon as the door was closed and they were secure behind the privacy of the curtains. She slumped and groaned, sitting down and rubbing at her temples with her hooves.

"What we hath wrought upon ourselves is foul indeed, dear sister."

That made Celestia smile at least a little bit. "Of that, I have no doubt. You attempted to win a drinking contest against me."

"Yes, the Mead Mare of Scaramouch! What were we thinking?" Luna muttered, her ears flattened against her skull. "Not so loud, please."

Celestia stood up and motioned for her sister to join her as she walked over to the table to take a seat once more. "Why are you putting up with it instead of simply recovering from it?"

"Because we yearn for stimuli. The vacuum of space does not offer much in the way of entertainment for over a thousand years. Even pain is something to relish," Luna muttered, slumping into a seat next to Celestia and cracking an eye open, looking up at her. "Where is thy tiara?"

Celestia reached up to touch the top of her head, finding a distinct lack of tiara anywhere. "I don't-" she began to say, until she turned her head and looked back in the direction of the balcony. "Ah."

She grabbed it with her magic and brought it over to the table, but made no move to put it back on. She dropped it into her forehooves and just...stared at it, for a moment. Memories of the argument before her little nap resurfaced, and she grimaced at the image of Twilight yelling at her atop the table. She just couldn't get the look on her student's face out of her head. There was so much pain behind that fury!

"I hurt her, Luna. Deeper than anyone else ever has, I think."

Luna stared at her for a moment, then let out a small yawn. "We see that your advisor was somewhat correct to come to us. We have not seen thee so heartbroken since Starswirl passed away."

"Is it that obvious?" Celestia asked.

"Thou hast wept in our presence before. We know the stains on thy cheeks," Luna muttered quietly, rubbing her forehead. "Thy expression says a thousand words, and more, to us. Thou art our sister, after all. We know thee. Though t'was rare that thou would ever cry, in the past."

"Well, things have changed considerably," Celestia muttered, smiling half-heartedly at her sister. "One example would be your antiquated way of speaking. It sounds so strange to me, after going without hearing it for so long."

"Yes, and thy modern tongue vexes me," Luna said, looking around. "No tea? This truly must have been quite a trying meeting you had."

Celestia slowly bowed her head. "I was meeting with my student about her...history. Before I made her my student."

"Ah. We take it thy student did not react favorably?"

"Her past isn't something that you simply bring up, it would seem," Celestia said, glancing at the ashes on the table. "But I had no choice in the matter."

"Thou art the monarch of Equestria! 'Tis always your choice," Luna stated firmly, looking to the ashes as well. "We assume this refuse has something to do with it?"

Celestia gave a small nod. "The remains of her buried criminal records, those that my more trustworthy assistants could dig up, anyways."

"Criminal records?" Luna said in surprise. "Since when did thou take on criminals as students, dear sister?"

"I was unaware of what she used to be."

Luna slowly sat up and took a deep breath, smiling a bit. "T'would seem we may be here for some time. Perhaps refreshments are in order? We only woke up an hour ago."

That made Celestia giggle just a little bit. Her sister never was a daytime kind of pony, and though one could blame it on her hangover, she knew that Luna always looked at least a little tired if she was awake during the day.

She sent for her assistant, and gave her the message to have some tea brought up. Luna, however, requested that a vast variety of beverages be brought along as well. She was particularly curious about what modern drinks had to offer. Nothing alcoholic though, as Celestia was eager to clarify. The last thing her sister needed was the hair of the dog that bit her.

They arrived on a tray, several bottles of various drinks that were wheeled in by Swirling Breeze once she'd returned with them. She busied herself with preparing Celestia's tea while Luna looked over the various selections. While there were plenty of juices to choose from, what caught her eye were the oddly-colored drinks with bubbles in them.

She picked up one that was labeled 'Oata-Cola' and looked it over curiously. "Pray tell, what is this bubbly-looking drink? If we did not know better, we would assume it to be some kind of alchemical concoction."

"That would be soda, or as some still choose to call it, pop," Celestia explained, smiling as Swirling finished setting up a kettle of tea. She even took the time to clean up the pile of ash on the table, along with wiping it down with a cloth to properly clean it off. "I tend to stay away from that drink. Too sweet for my palate, among other things."

Luna hummed at that tidbit of information and looked back to the glass bottle, staring at it for a moment before walking over to the table and taking a seat next to Celestia. She eyed the cap on it for a few moments before fiddling with it with her magic.

"Do we simply pull it off?"

"Yes."

Luna did so, the metal cap bending, then suddenly popping free with a noisy clink, flipping into the air before Luna caught it again. She stared at the bent cap for a moment.

"The design seems wasteful. We certainly cannot re-use it." she muttered, shrugging and bringing the bottle up to her nose, sniffing the opening a few times.

Then she took a small sip. Then a swig. Then she chugged it with a delighted, happy hum. Celestia simply watched, the corner of her muzzle lifting in amusement. She knew what would come next. It was one of the main reasons she never drank soda, aside from it making her have to pee a whole lot.

Luna finished the drink off and set the bottle down on the table, licking her lips with a wide smile. "Goodness! Such a sweet, yet cloven treat! It tingles on the tongue, and-"

Luna's evaluation was cut off as she was suddenly caught off-guard by a titanic belch that actually made Celestia lean away from her. When it finally ended, Luna's face lit up with a beet-red blush, a hoof covering her muzzle while Celestia and Swirling Breeze just stared at her. Celestia's expression was one of bemusement, while Swirling Breeze made it clear that she was struggling to stop herself from laughing.

Luna didn't give her a chance. "Hold thy tongue, servant-mare! One peep, and we shall-!"

Swirling couldn't help it. She broke down into laughter, making Luna's embarrassment skyrocket even more. It only got worse as Luna tried to stifle another, less massive burp, but there was no keeping it down. Even Celestia couldn't contain her own laughter much longer as Luna gave them both a glare that could melt iron.

"Was this one of thine famous pranks, sister?!"

Celestia covered her muzzle with a hoof and shook her head firmly. "No! That is simply another reason I don't drink soda. Imagine trying to hold court after drinking one of those."

Luna tried to imagine that. She imagined her sister knocking back a bottle of that deliciously deceptive soda, sitting upon her throne addressing a group of ponies while her guards stood at attention...only to let loose an echoing belch that ponies would be able to hear outside the castle.

Soon, Luna was laughing as well. "'Tis most wise of thee!"

"Also, there is caffeine in it, and I get enough of that in my tea every day." Celestia explained, looking over to Swirling Breeze and giving her a brief nod. "Thank you, Swirling Breeze. That will be all."

Swirling struggled to stifle her laughter as she left the room, bowing to both of them before she left. When the doors shut, Celestia let out a bark of laughter while Luna glared at her, fuming in her own embarrassment.

"Hah! Ah...I needed that," Celestia said, slowly calming down while lighting her horn, using her magic to heat the kettle of tea. "Thank you, Luna."

The much smaller alicorn sighed and took a deep breath, stifling another burp and nodding to her. "Thou art welcome. Now, art thou ready to talk?"

"Hm?"

Luna sat up straighter, pushing the soda bottle aside. "The reason for thy state of discontent. Tell me," she said, scooting her seat a bit closer to her sister. "Do not bury thy pain, Tia. We hath done so, and it did not end well for us, or for thee."

The good mood Celestia had built up dissipated as quickly as it had come. Slowly she seemed to deflate before Luna's eyes, and she spared a glance at her tiara, still sitting on the table in front of her. She immediately considered how many rumors would spread around from her being seen by even a single pony without her tiara on, during working hours....

"Well?" Luna stated firmly, idly looking over the other drinks on the cart. "Hm, such a vast range of juices..."

Celestia sighed quietly and nodded, pouring herself a cup of tea with her magic while she pondered on what to say. How could she possibly start this off? It wasn't impossible to justify what she'd done on reflection, but she also couldn't deny that she'd hurt her student deeply with her inability to trust her.

"She used to work for the Mafia, Luna," Celestia started, her wings tightening against her sides. "Against her will. At least, that is what I want to believe."

Luna frowned at that, the glass full of juice halfway to her lips. "Would this be some new crime organization like the Corral of Thieves, back then?"

"No, the Mafia is far worse. They use the system against us. Bribe guards, store owners and police, and enter into shady deals behind closed doors while taking over areas of larger cities and conducting baser criminal operations in smaller towns," she explained, silently wishing she hadn't yet burned all those papers. "They blackmailed Twilight when she was only six years old."

Luna stared at Celestia for a moment, before pressing her lips to the rim of her glass and downing half of it in one go. She set the glass down a moment later and licked her lips with a pleasant sigh.

"We assume that them going after her so early was due to her intellect and magical potential?" she asked, floating the bottle full of the juice she'd just drank. "Mango? Quite a delicious and exotic fruit!"

"Yes. They held her family over her head, threatening her with them," Celestia muttered, sipping her tea to help herself relax. "If she ever stepped out of line, they would kill her family. Part of me wonders if they would go after Cadance as well."

"Who is Cadance?"

"The only remaining true heir to the Crystal Empire."

That got Luna's attention. She froze for a moment, her mouth hanging open in shock before a wide smile spread across her muzzle. There was an heir. An heir!

"D-does she know?!" she asked, her forehooves thudding against the edge of the table as she stood up in her excitement.

"No. Not yet, at least," Celestia said, smiling a little. "I must admit, you have changed significantly from the brooding, quiet little sister I once knew."

Luna grinned at that. "We are reborn, Tia! Didst thou see the villagers of Ponyville?!" she asked, sitting back down and staring off into the distance. "Such a feast laid before us upon our return, by mere commoners...never before have we felt so overwhelmed, yet so welcome."

"Well, Ponyville is a very special town," Celestia said, shaking her head. "Even I cannot grasp how they have gone so untouched, and how they have retained such a loving philosophy in these more recent years."

"No doubt because of thee?" Luna remarked with a smirk, sipping some more of her juice.

Celestia shrugged a little. "Only partially. I moreso lucked out, giving the Apple Family that land to settle on so long ago. They are an exceptionally virtuous family of farmers...and they attract ponies with those traits, or inspire it in others."

Luna nodded to that, running a hoof over her own mane, taking a deep breath. "Yes, but that only distracts from thy issues. Thou were saying?"

Celestia nodded to that and stared down into her teacup. "I betrayed her trust once, by not confiding in her what I saw inside her when we first met," she muttered. "In doing so, I sent her after you unprepared. I felt it was necessary at the time, but now...."

"Now, thy doubts consume thee?"

"Not completely. I know my student. If I'd told her about the Elements of Harmony, she would have tried to force it. Of that, I have no doubt," Celestia said, glancing at her tiara. "But I wonder if I was forced to betray her because of my position, rather than because of necessity. If I had merely been her friend instead of the ruler of Equestria, could I have guided her differently?"

"A difficult question to answer," Luna mused, pouring herself another cup of yet another more yellow-colored juice. "And likely, one that thou shalt never find a proper answer to."

"Perhaps. But, the trouble comes from after she brought you back. I confronted her in the hospital, when she woke up," Celestia continued, clearing her throat. It was suddenly becoming a little difficult to speak clearly. "From what you told me...I knew she'd killed before. I assumed the worst of her. Suspected the worst."

"Yes, she was quite...aggressive, shall we say?" Luna said with a wide smile. "We would dearly wish to fight her again. The fire of a true warrior hides within thy student!"

Celestia snorted at that. "Ah yes, my sister the warmare."

Luna huffed at that and waved it off. "Certainly better than the soldiers thou has! They woke us from our fitful slumber, and we watched them from the balcony out of curiosity. We were not impressed."

"The Royal Guard are not mere soldiers these days," Celestia stated firmly. "We haven't had a war in ages."

"Indeed. It shows," Luna teased, blowing a small raspberry. "Their performance was sloppy at best."

"I would appreciate you not insulting my guards, sister."

"We would also appreciate thou staying on-topic, Tia."

Celestia's wings unfurled and she nodded once. "Of course, Luna."

It was simple enough to explain. The problem was in the context of it all. She relayed her initial confrontation, her admission to manipulating her student...and then probably her most grievous betrayal: the confrontation between them earlier that morning. Luna stayed passive as Celestia spoke, seeming to take more enjoyment from taste-testing the various juices on the cart.

"T'would seem to us that both thee and thine student are at fault," Luna stated after a brief moment of silence, once Celestia was done speaking. "Thou, for fulfilling thy duties in such an efficient manner, and her for losing her temper."

"I believe she was entirely justified in losing her temper." Celestia muttered, her good mood all but gone after relaying what had happened.

"Oh, we are not saying she was not justified," Luna said with a smile. "That does not change that she was wrong to do so. Thou hast been teaching her self-control?"

"As I do with all of my students, yes. They have to know self-control to make full use of their abilities. That has always been my mentality."

"Then we believe her irrationality can be blamed on her upbringing," Luna said with finality, shaking her head. "A life of working for one's most hated of enemies against thy will...we can see how she would be disturbed. We are shocked she is not in worse condition."

"You're assuming she isn't in worse condition," Celestia muttered, leaning against the table a little and hanging her head. "I do not know my student as well as I would like, and I fear she will never open up to me now."

"Yes, thou art a fool, bound so tightly to thy duties that we may as well write up marriage documents for thee," Luna uttered with a tiny smile. "Why didst thou approach her so soon with evidence of her wicked endeavors?"

"Because I feared if I didn't do it now, I never would. Some things simply seem better left alone, the longer you stare at them."

"Hm. Fair reasoning, we suppose. We did not take thee for a coward though," Luna muttered, her smile instantly disappearing. "Not after what thou forced thyself to do to us."

If emotions could cause her physical pain beyond a headache, Celestia would have doubled over from the dagger her sister had just planted in her heart. Silence fell over both of them, and for a moment, Luna froze, slowly looking up at her sister with an expression that screamed of regret...yet, she could not find the words. Not right away.

Celestia, however, could say a lot simply with the slow, sad frown that overtook her muzzle. "I-I...I am-"

Luna quickly held up a hoof, leaning over a little to actually reach Celestia's lips and silence them. "Nay, dear sister. Thou did what thou had to do to protect thy subjects. We will not fault thee for that. We were out of line."

Celestia managed a weak smile. "If Twilight has every right to be upset, you do as well, Luna."

Luna stared down at the table in thought for a moment, then nodded. "Then yes. Yes, it does upset us, even though we know it was necessary," she said, hah'ing and rubbing her only vaguely sore head with a hoof. "How alike, the two of us are! Your student and us, plagued by our pasts."

Celestia actually laughed at that a little. "All too true."

"Still. Keeping on the subject at hoof," Luna said, sitting up straighter and pouring herself another cup of that tasty mango juice. "Thou made the grievous mistake of clinging too tightly to thy station, and it has bitten a hole in thy heart."

"Yes," Celestia muttered. "I have made the same mistake I did with you."

Luna took a swig of her drink and shook her head. "Not quite, but of a similar vein."

Celestia thought on that for a brief moment before bowing her head. "I am sorry, Luna."

"As are we, sister. Perhaps, much like Twilight, it will merely take time for the wound to heal," she said, sighing softly. "We have no trouble being around thee, but we cannot forget a thousand years of isolation. The icy vacuum, the air being pulled from our lungs, our body screaming for sustenance we could not give it, no sound, not even our own voice could come to us....!"

Luna trembled, and in an instant, she found vast white wings curling around her. She was startled by her sibling's speed, and before she could protest, she found forelegs curling around her barrel, hugging her in a tight embrace that would've been bone-crushing for a normal pony. As it was, Luna only had some mild trouble breathing.

Celestia's breathing was erratic, and for a time, the two sat there, just enjoying the closeness in a way that only sisters truly could. Celestia's tears came unbidden once more, but there was a small smile on her face.

"It's over now Luna...you're back! My sister has finally returned to me!"

"Indeed we have!" she breathed out, squirming in Celestia's tightening embrace. "Release us from thine death-grip, gentlest of giants!"

"Hah! You still remember that old nickname?" Celestia asked, slowly releasing Luna from her deceptively powerful grasp.

"Of course!" Luna said with a small laugh. "How could we ever forget?"

They sat there together for a time, thoughts racing while they basked in one another's company. To Celestia, it almost felt like her sister had never left her. Almost.

Luna, however, had other thoughts on her mind.

"Sister," she asked, her expression becoming more serious as she glanced around the room. "How bad is the Mafia?"

Celestia's smile faded. "They believe they are secretive enough to avoid my gaze, just because I haven't shined a light on them...but they are everywhere," she explained, glancing over towards the door. "If only it were as simple as exposing them one at a time...."

"Things in life are rarely so easy," Luna muttered, snorting a little. "We remember the days after Discord."

"Yes. But the Mafia is worse," Celestia muttered, moving to take her seat next to Luna once more. "They have become so pervasive, even members of the nobility answer to them almost exclusively."

"The nobles?!" Luna stated, her eyes wide with shock. "But...they were given their titles so as to be recognized for their dedication to serving the common good!"

Celestia nodded to that. "Yes, but Equestria has grown, Luna. I could never run this nation entirely on my own. Nor could we do it together. Because of that..." Celestia explained slowly, letting out a small breath in frustration. "It wasn't even a matter of me giving them power. They took it right out from under my snout."

"Ah. How so?"

"Their families invested their fortunes in businesses large and small, and conducted their own business without anypony else knowing," Celestia continued, glancing over towards the drawn curtains at the balcony doors. "As the economy developed, their investments and interwoven relationships grew, as did their corruption. From that, an entirely new breed of criminal was born. One that could stand in plain sight, and still be impossible for me to destroy by myself."

Luna frowned at that, pondering on the idea of such a beast in equine skin. "How could such a thing be possible? The very concept seems akin to a fairy tale."

"The most valuable piece of information that I have on the Mafia is that someone in the Mage's Council, the council responsible for policing all of the magic research we conduct in Equestria, works for them," Celestia stated as quietly as she could, as if afraid someone might hear her besides her sister. "It isn't as far-fetched as it may at first seem. As I said Luna...they are everywhere."

Luna went wide-eyed at that revelation, frowning deeply and leaning against the table for support. "Then by 'everywhere', thou doth mean...even among the guard?"

"I don't know all of the guards that are in their pocket, but there are quite a few, and they're all over Equestria."

"...How did it get this bad in my absence?" Luna breathed, shaking her head. "Thou wouldst have crushed such villainy, had thou known about it!"

"Yes. I would have, if I could've predicted it," Celestia responded, staring down at her tiara sitting on the table. "But by the time I realized, it was far too late."

"'Tis never too late to stomp out criminals, openly exploiting Equestria from the inside!"

Celestia clenched her teeth in frustration. "By the time I noticed, if I had said or attempted to do anything about it...it would've looked like the governing body of the country was trying to destroy itself," she muttered, slamming her hoof on the table. "Propaganda, lies, slandering my name...they would've done everything, all over Equestria, until they turned the majority of the population against me. That was not and still isn't something I can allow. As it stands, the only reason I still have my throne is because I've done nothing to stop them...but now, I see that my own student has suffered, and I find all these years of frustration coming to the surface once more!"

Celestia banged her hoof against the edge of her table again, gritting her teeth.

"How many more out there are like Twilight? Ponies I don't know about that they've dug their claws into? I don't have the resources to keep track of them all!"

"Timberwolves, keeping their prey in check until they are ready to bury them," Luna muttered, slowly shaking her head. "'Tis a true crisis."

"One that I can't even properly address because I cannot do it openly! They manipulate from the shadows," Celestia growled out. "If I attempted anything, there's no telling what they would do. They could try to assassinate me, and upon failing that, they would go after my closest advisors. My assistants, my hoof-picked guards...all of them warnings for me to know my place. If I did not cease at that point, I don't want to imagine how far they would go to see me ousted from my position so they can have it for themselves. They would put their own puppet on the throne, of that I have no doubt."

"Indeed," Luna said, waving it off. "This is certainly not what we expected upon our return. With how our ponies revered thee so, we expected to find thee sitting upon a throne in a temple being worshipped against thy will."

"I was never that bad, Luna. Neither were our subjects."

"That is debatable." Luna said with a cheshire grin.

Celestia just hmph'ed and smiled a little. "Whatever you say, sister mine."

"Oh, dost thou wish to make an attempt at being dismissive of facts?"

Celestia slowly shook her head. "No. I'm just having a difficult time losing myself in the playful mood you're attempting to lure me into."

Luna's smile faded just a little. "That obvious, were we?"

"Your intent is not lost on me," Celestia said, reaching with a wing to lay the end of it over Luna's withers. "Thank you."

"Thou art welcome!"

They sat there for a time together, with Celestia finishing off another cup of tea and Luna trying out a different brand of soda at a more sedate pace. The silent companionship between them spoke volumes to both mares, and just for a moment, they could enjoy the sensation that even after a thousand years, they still knew each other inside and out.

"Soooo...thy student..."

Celestia knew that tone. "Yes, what about her?"

"Can she be...discreet about her paramours?"

"I'm quite sure she can," Celestia said slowly. "But you're barking up the wrong tree."

"How so?" Luna huffed, crossing her forelegs over one another and leaning them on the top of the table. "She is strong, attractive, confident and capable...and she can put up a fight! It has been such a long time since we have felt the touch of a mare as intimidating as her...."

Celestia waved it off. "I would still not recommend it."

"Why would that be, sister? Perhaps thou wishes to keep thy student for thyself?" Luna teased, grinning and reaching to poke Celestia with a hoof. "Or perhaps she does not share my abnormal tastes? T'would truly be a shame to waste such loveliness on stallions."

"Oh, she enjoys mares. Prefers them, from what I've heard," Celestia said calmly, pouring herself another cup of tea. "But you're still barking up the wrong tree."

"Yet we see thou has opted not to tell us why this is so."

Celestia grinned ever-so-slightly. "'Tis a secret, and I've betrayed my student's trust enough for her lifetime. If you wish to find out, I suppose you'll have to find out on your own. Just be prepared to be disappointed."

"A mare as luscious as her? We will not be disappointed at all," Luna muttered, blushing a little. "It hath been a thousand years since the last. We desire the intimacy of companionship, and thy student would be wonderful."

"Of that, I have no doubt," Celestia said, smiling a little. "Up to you to make it happen though. Times are different. I can't simply send her to your chambers one night for you to enjoy."

Luna snorted at that. "She answers to thee, does she not? Yours to command?"

"Mine to teach, but not to command. Modern times are very..." Celestia tried to explain, searching for a proper word. "Reserved about such things, compared to back then."

"What would we have to do then?"

"Well, attempting to court her properly would be a start."

"Court her?! We have no intention of marrying her!" Luna said, looking aghast at the mention of it. "Thine subjects would never accept such a thing either!"

Celestia smiled smugly, giving Luna a wink. "As I said...times have changed."

"...Art thou implying what we think is being implied?"

"If you think that implication is that gay marriage is at least somewhat accepted, moreso between mares than stallions, then yes."

"...."

Luna slowly smiled wider and wider, before running her forehooves over her muzzle, laughing softly to herself.

"W-we do not have to hide, and skulk in shadows when we seek the touch of our paramours?"

Celestia grinned at that, her wing tightening around Luna a little. "Well, perhaps you will have to show moderation...but no. You no longer have to hide, dear sister."

Luna almost couldn't restrain her joy at such wonderful news! She jumped to her hooves and hugged her sister without warning, her forelegs wrapping around Celestia's neck and almost choking the larger Princess.

"Was this thy doing, sister?!" Luna asked, her wings spread wide in excitement.

Celestia laughed at her sister's jubilance and hooked a foreleg around her back. "Only partially! It would be more accurate to say that over time, our ponies came to their senses about the matter. Somewhat," she explained, her smile fading just a little bit. "Sadly stallions are still ostracised for homosexual practices, but at least they aren't hung from trees for the way they were born, or their learned preferences."

Luna was practically jumping for joy at this point. "Eee, Tia! We can take a lover! No, more than one! We must rekindle the ancient rights to own a harem!"

Celestia actually snickered at that and patted her sister on her back. "One step at a time, Luna. First, why don't we focus on getting you re-integrated with Equestria? Perhaps once that's over, we can look into those ancient laws and see if they're still legal."

"They had best be!" Luna stated loudly, pouting a little and releasing Celestia, flopping down in her seat again. "We hath never felt the joy of a harem before. T'was not allowed back then, no matter how much we desired such."

Celestia sipped from her teacup while giving a glance to the balcony. It seemed like a nice day out...and upon recalling the weather schedule, an idea formed in her mind. Something she hadn't taken the time to do in at least a month or so. Not for the simple joy of doing so, that is.

"Would you like to go for a walk into Canterlot with me, Luna? I could show you around, and introduce you to some of our subjects there." Celestia offered, smiling at the thought.

Luna considered that offer, tapping her chin in thought. It was a scary prospect, if she was being honest with herself. She still felt weak, and strangely vulnerable as she was, and the castle staff gave her very odd looks. That brought back bad memories. She wanted to believe the jubilance of Ponyville wasn't an isolated case, but....

She looked up to Celestia and gave a quick nod. "Yes, we will join thee for thy venture into the kingdom! 'Tis the least we can do."

"Only if you wish to, Luna."

"As we said! Let us go."

Both mares got up from their seats, their drinks forgotten for the time being. Celestia used her magic to pull the curtains open once more, letting light into the room in full force once more. Luna winced a bit at the sudden glare, but compared to earlier, she was feeling far less sensitive, no doubt thanks to the liquids she'd consumed.

Speaking of which...Luna was suddenly very aware of the fact that she needed to go to the bathroom. Very bad, for that matter. As soon as Celestia pointed to a door at the side of the lounge, Luna was off like a lightning bolt, the door slamming shut behind her as she relieved herself. Celestia took the time to walk over to the balcony, peering through the glass to gaze upon the ponies taking their time conversing and wandering through the gardens. Perhaps she'd join them, when the day was over....

When Luna finished her business, Celestia moved to leave the room, leading the way while Luna followed suit. Luna, however, stopped and looked back to the table.

"What about thine tiara, sister?"

Celestia looked back and stared at the tiara for a time, considering all the possible ramifications of her not having it on when she left the lounge. Her ponies weren't used to seeing her without it, almost to the point that if she left her room without her tiara on, ponies would be uncomfortable even looking at her for any lengthy period of time.

"I will come back for it later," Celestia said, opening the door with her magic. "Shall we?"

Author's Note

Well, this was a departure from the norm of this story! I hope you enjoyed this glimpse into the relationships between the two sisters, as well as this glimpse into Celestia's mental health.

Chapter 14 - Taking Stock

written by Fire Soul

I woke up extremely early after bucking that poor colt's brains out. It was easy enough to slip the ring off my horn for a moment before he and I got down to business, and I wasn't in the greatest of mental states at the time to be casting magic, buuut...given he didn't freak out about my cock flopping on his belly every time I sunk down to the root on top of him, I don't think I miscast the spell.

Well, that or he was way too high on E to care, but that's neither here nor there.

I removed the ring from my horn and checked his memories one last time to see if he perceived me the way I wanted him to throughout, and when I was sure I'd done a good enough job of it, I left. Not much ceremony to it, and I really wanted to get home, take a shower, and pass out in bed. Maybe even curl up with Spike, because Spike was and still is the best little teddy bear sleep aid.

When I got home, I dismissed the foalsitter and offered to let her stay the rest of the morning so she didn't have to go out walking while it was still dark out, but she insisted that she was fine. Eh well, I offered. Her choice if she wants to risk getting mugged.

I took a quick shower, took some time to massage my bad hindleg, then slinked into Spike's room and picked him up out of his basket. He slept like a log, so I only interrupted his sleep for a brief moment before he zonked out once more. I carried him to my bed and curled up around him, hugging him close and quickly falling asleep.

You don't realize how much time of yours is spent on something until you truly cut that something out of your life. It gets even worse when you can't safely use your magic. That didn't stop me from using my magic, but I'm sure me repeatedly removing the inhibitor from my horn in order to do so probably extended the duration of my recovery.

So of course, with nothing better to do, I went into my laboratory in the basement and secured my privacy so I could re-evaluate my old plans in peace. They needed drastic revisions anyways, considering how horrendously out-of-date the information written down was.

The first step was gathering some intel, and that required a crew...or perhaps, just some old contacts. I still had ponies I could talk to all over Equestria, but one in particular came to mind. He was by no means loyal to me, but I think I could convince him to help me out. Beyond that, I needed some muscle, and I needed to find a lot more help than just two other ponies. I needed ponies that would see me as their boss...as long as they didn't actually know it was me.

Unfortunately, with my use of magic restricted, I couldn't function at peak efficiency, and I hated functioning at anything less than my best. You wouldn't like me when I get sick, I get really, really grumpy. Basically what I'm saying is, I wasn't going to be getting any real work done without my magic at my beck and call. Seriously, my hoofwriting's awful in comparison, and don't even try to talk me into writing with my mouth!

So, with little else to do, I spent my time catching up on some reading, watching some television, and making a point to avoid my parents whenever they, very briefly, came home. I had questions I needed to ask them, questions I'd been putting off for a long time, but I still wasn't quite ready. Even after my argument with Celestia, I couldn't bring myself to face either of them.

Shit...I really needed to apologize to her.

She didn't deserve that. I know why she did what she did. Fuck, I damn near predicted it for crying out loud! Why'd I fly off the handle on her like that? She'd been nothing but nice to me, and...fuck.

In any case, it was a solid two weeks before it was deemed safe for me to remove my inhibitor ring. Within that time, Spike and I had actually caught up on the Daring Do series. To say he was a big fan at his age was an understatement. That series was partially the reason he tried so hard to learn how to read.

Speaking of Spike, the moment I had all my affairs in order and my magic was back to full capacity, I found a foalsitter to watch him for a couple weeks. I didn't want to make a habit of this sort of thing, but for now, it was necessary. I had places to go and businesses to buy out.

Did I have the funds? Why yes, I did. Not from being Lady Sparkle of House Sparkle, but because if there's one thing the Mafia does well, it's paying those that do right by the organization. No one in my family knows exactly how rich I am, but to put it simply, I could retire for a very long time if I so chose, without ever having to work a single job ever again, even if I didn't get a royal stipend for personal research as Celestia's pupil. That money goes in an entirely separate account from where I keep the money I made from the Mafia.

Of course, there was always something I did as a kind of back-up security for Spike. No, I'm not overprotective, why do you ask?

It started with a visit to Vinyl's club. Strange, I know. Then again, I haven't told you a whole lot about a certain Octavia Melody. For one, she hates it whenever anyone brings up that last name of hers, since she technically doesn't have one, but that's neither here nor there.

Remember what I said before, about daring to lay a hoof on Vinyl Scratch? Yeah there's a reason for that. Let me put it this way: even I wouldn't want to fuck with Octavia, especially when I'm within her reach. She's got a temper worse than a greed-fallen dragon's and the strength to match.

One stallion talked shit about Vinyl while Octavia was in earshot, once, while I was around to see it. She broke his jaw, one of his forelegs and three of his ribs for it, went to jail for a couple weeks before being let out and being scolded by Vinyl for being such a fire-headed idiot. Didn't stop her from doing it again and paying for the next guy's hospital bills. Though, I suppose saying 'Vinyl scolded her' is a bit misleading.

See, Vinyl's a mute. Not by any natural means. No, she took a nasty stab through the neck. Damn miracle she didn't die from it. I can only be thankful I was around to watch out for her until she got back on her hooves and got back to her work.

Yes, I know who did it to her. Maybe someday I'll have the courage to actually re-open that wound and tell her.

It's difficult for me to think of myself as their friend. Not because either of them are bad friends or anything, it's nothing of the sort. In fact, both Octavia and Vinyl have been nothing but good to me since I first met both of them. Not to mention, I was really young when I met those two.

Vinyl was the first I met. I was only eight at the time, and she was...different. She lacked a certain presence that I'd become accustomed to picking up on. That kind of presence that has your gut instinct telling you to be cautious, and be prepared for anything. Mind you by meeting her first I mean that I observed her from a distance, but that's basically the same thing when you're as thorough at looking into someone as I am.

She was boisterous and a party mare, sure. Bad? Farthest thing from it. She grew up in the Red District, and I don't think I need to tell you how growing up in a place like that could really fuck a kid's life over. Despite that, she came out of it fairly normal, all things considered. I'm not saying she's some pure spirit, but she's certainly leagues above me on the ladder of saints. I don't even think there's a spot on it for me.

She befriended a lot of the prostitutes in the Red District while growing up. She didn't judge them for their professions. Even at a young age, I think she knew what they got up to. But she'd always been an artist at her core, and instead of letting her environment get her down she just kinda...went with the flow. She drew inspiration from the strangest sources, taking the more carnal activities of the Red District and making a kind of rhythm out of them. Unfortunately, she didn't have an outlet for that rhythm until technology caught up with her genius when she was in her teens.

That was when she began to make her dreams come true. That was also when she became a target because she was stepping on one too many fetlocks, trying to set her club up right in the middle of the Red District. She'd put out a few albums of her own and gotten the fame and income to make it happen, and she'd refused to affiliate herself with the Mafia in any way. The Mafia doesn't like letting potential cash cows get away from them like that. Not only was she competition for up-and-coming ponies like Sapphire Shores, she was interfering in operations in the entirety of the Red District with her mere presence and her attempt to start up her own club. Clearly killing the mare was the only solution. She didn't exactly have anything in the form of a family they could go after.

How fortunate that the pony they sent to take care of her fucked it up.

They stabbed her through the neck before her security arrived. They didn't have time to finish the job. She survived the assault, but...well, she lost her voice. If she screams at a high enough pitch you can get a squeak out of her, but that's about it. No amount of magic stimulation ever managed to help her vocal cords heal, so she opted to leave it be.

She didn't let it get her down. No, she just kept on trucking, like it didn't change anything at all. Of course it did, but Vinyl Scratch is a consummate professional, and that's something I can respect above all else. I'm also entirely sure that as long as it didn't cripple her ability to make her unique brand of music, she didn't really let it bug her.

Still, that kind of attitude can be dangerous, especially when it causes you to turn a blind eye to potential danger. She didn't up her security around her fledgling club after the attack, and with how widespread the Mafia were, it was only a matter of time before she hired the wrong bodyguards and got herself stabbed in the back. That was when I got myself involved.

At the time I wasn't so deeply involved in Mafia affairs to know the ins and outs of how the whole organization worked, but I knew enough to know that she needed some assistance. Of course, directly approaching Vinyl would never work out for me. No, I needed a different angle. Why would she ever listen to an eight-year-old, y'know?

So I went looking for something specific. I started looking for security firms that had no affiliation with the Mafia. Unfortunately, those were few and far between, in and out of Canterlot. I was actually on the verge of giving up when another solution presented itself to me.

There had been a bit of a turf war in Trottingham, between multiple gangs. Normally that city was pretty quiet, but recent activities on the Mafia's part left a bit of a power vacuum there, and a lot of territory sat unclaimed. Multiple local gangs went after it with gusto...and a few of them were either completely wiped out, or pushed out of Trottingham entirely.

Enter, Octavia. Originally born into a prestigious noble family, she was disowned when she disobeyed and decided she wanted to make her own way in life instead of doing exactly as her family expected of her. Thus, her sensitivity to the name 'Philharmonica'. Frankly she hates her ex-family with a passion only matched by the fires of the sun itself.

But okay, that's not the point here. Octavia wound up on the streets and homeless after being disowned at the age of ten, with little to her name aside from the bowtie around her neck. Like so many others, I'm sure she did a lot of things she isn't proud of just to get up out of rock-bottom, but the point is, she got back on her hooves and started her own gang. Crime pays, regardless of what some may say, especially when you're the one in charge.

She formed a gang known as the Codas. Personally I'm surprised that, lacking a more formal, higher-class education, she knew what a coda was, but much like Vinyl, Octavia didn't let anything keep her down. She had that same fiery spirit. Hers just burned a whole lot brighter than Vinyl's ever did. That mare is loud, arrogant, cocky, and has a mouth worse than mine. That's saying something.

When they were in Trottingham, they numbered just over a hundred. Once they got involved with the territory disputes between gangs, that number got cut in half real fast, and that was when Octavia decided to make a run for it with what was left of her gang. Nothing solid, but the intel I had at the time estimated them to be around fifty strong, but only twenty or so stuck by Octavia after that debacle. The others just kinda dispersed and never came back, unless they got killed on the way out.

Octavia would be the one more likely to listen to a child, given her situation. Still, I had to approach her carefully. She was just the right amount of desperate that she would probably be on a hair trigger if I was even slightly suspicious or if I looked like I was trying to set her up. So I went with what I knew best: I approached her professionally.

It didn't go as well as some might expect.

After I used my magic to beat up a few of her colts, she decided to approach me directly. I'd proven I wasn't exactly a normal filly, so I'd piqued her interest on a more personal level. She didn't take kindly to me beating up her ponies, but eh. Shit happens. Who knew that brute force would get through her thick skull? Looking back, I was pretty stupid for thinking otherwise.

I actually had to fight her to get her to listen to me. I'm sure she was just putting on a show for her gang, and in all fairness, she was pretty tough. Unicorns have the advantage at-range, for obvious reasons, but some earth ponies...phew. Look, telekinetic grip isn't this foolproof thing that no one can break free of. Pegasi can break free by using the magic in their wings to overwhelm it, and earth ponies can do the same with their bodies simply by struggling. You know an earth pony's strong when they can break my grip, even if I was only a child at the time. She was only six years older than me, she was still a child too!

Still, I didn't need to hold on to her for very long to throw her against a few walls, so...yeah. Unicorn still wins if they aren't in bucking distance.

Now, this might all seem strange. Underage kids opening up nightclubs and buying property and such? Well, you have to understand, the labor laws in Equestria are really hit-or-miss. They were originally made with the idea of a stable, core family in mind. Sure, a child could buy a house, but it's expected that the parents would have some say in such things.

You know Rarity, one of my newest friends? She bought that boutique of hers when she was twelve. Need I say more? How about the fact that Pinkie Pie left her family behind when she was nine, went to Ponyville, and rented one of the rooms in Sugarcube Corner in exchange for working in the shop?

Of course, there are limitations. For example, Vinyl's 'nightclub' was originally a place that could only be open during the day, and only with clear adult supervision, during the day. Of course, by 'adult supervision', I mean some of the prostitutes that Vinyl had made friends with. Even set up a more discreet facet of their business in her club when it was just starting out. They kept an eye on her, she made her music, and things were fine. Her orphanage caretaker certainly didn't seem to have an issue with it. I'd question why she didn't have a problem with hookers wandering around the place, but then, I've also killed ponies, so that's tame by comparison.

Unfortunately, children cannot become a security team. That's just one of those obvious things, why would you ever assume they could? This was my main problem in presenting the idea to Octavia to begin with, but that was why I wanted her to talk to Vinyl in the first place. I laid it out clean as I could for her. Vinyl needed some protection she could count on, and while what she had at the moment was acceptable, she needed...witnesses, and potential friends that could step in if someone tried to threaten her life again.

So I introduced them. Well, it's more accurate to say that I pointed Octavia in Vinyl's direction, and Octavia introduced me to Vinyl, and aired suspicions that Vinyl might've sent me after her, but that's not important. What was important was, they were talking, and they were making some deals with each other under the table.

Admittedly, it was a gamble on my part. I had no way of knowing how well this would work out, nor did I know if they'd even get along. At the time Vinyl had to speak by writing things down, and kudos to her for investing in a portable whiteboard, really saves on resource costs. You can imagine how amusing it was to have the boisterous and rowdy Octavia trying to hold a conversation with Vinyl Scratch, a mute that had to use a whiteboard to converse. Nowadays she uses her magic to form words in the air if she really needs to talk.

So imagine my surprise when, upon meeting each other, they hit it off like they'd known each other their entire lives. Octavia was downright smitten, unrepentantly so, and her flirting method was particularly blunt-force trauma. How appropriate. She was like a dog chasing a car when it came to Vinyl and it was absolutely adorable. Only difference was, unlike a dog, she knew exactly what to do with that car once she caught it.

It's not like Vinyl was any better either. Say what you will about Octavia, she was at least considerate, regardless of how forward she might be. It was interesting to watch, almost basic in how easily they fit together. Octavia went full-throttle, then Vinyl stepped in and readjusted the pace to something that better suited her more passive personality, and Octavia acquiesced without a moment's hesitation.

It was like watching two teenagers find true love, and that's the most saccharine stuff you can possibly witness. Thus, it shouldn't surprise you to find out that some of the ponies in Octavia's gang didn't exactly approve of this new turn Octavia was taking their gang in. Long story short, only eleven of her original gang bothered to stick by her side.

I mean, I guess they both were very young teenagers at the time, but...whatever, you get my point. I'm getting scatterbrained about this.

Vinyl certainly had some questions regarding me, especially after Octavia said that I went and found her so she could talk to Vinyl herself. Heh, I just told her I was a nosy brat who happened to hear about what exactly happened to Vinyl that night. I was just lucky that Vinyl wasn't as inquisitive as I was. I'm sure Octavia was suspicious at the time, but she's the kind of pony that lets a lot slide as long as you prove you're worth the trouble.

When all was said and done, Vinyl had herself a new group of friends she hung out with like they were her groupies, and I got a thoroughly-needed reprieve from shadowing her at night. I'd killed more than a few that'd been sent after her, other hitponies like myself that didn't expect an eight-year-old to be so adept at wrapping garrote wire around their throats. Shows what you get for assuming, huh?

Fast-forward a few years, and they're both full-fledged adults, and Octavia's managed to pull off the monumental task of seducing that party mare to the point that Vinyl's fanbase is forced to concede that yes, they will never have a chance with that young starlet with the two-toned spiky mane. Didn't stop local ponies from trying of course, but they quickly learned that the head of security in the club didn't take too kindly to them trying to be homewreckers.

I think being protective has just always been in Octavia's nature. Take when I was a mere fourteen years of age, for example. Certain allowances were made for me back then, even late in the evening. Octavia and I had talked more over the years, when I'd made the place a more common hangout for Spike and I during the day. She understood my situation probably better than anypony else, being forced into a situation I didn't entirely know how to cope with. My situation was just far more tame than Octavia's, in several ways.

I never brought Spike there when the club actually became a nightclub in the evening, something that Vinyl had been looking forward to ever since she opened the place while she was underage. Things were a bit too wild for someone his age, and I wouldn't want to risk him being around all of that loud noise, and all those potentially drunk ponies.

I, of course, wasn't allowed to have any alcohol, and while I was in the club I was being supervised, and this particular incident was no exception. The bartender was keeping an eye on me this time around, and since he was the one serving me drinks, it was generally accepted that as long as I didn't wander around, I was fine. The only problem was that he was a new hire, only around a few months, and he seemed a bit squirrelly to me.

It was well into the night when I started feeling strange. I felt light-headed, and the world seemed to appear underwater to me the longer I sat there. Whatever someone had slipped me, it was taking effect alarmingly quick, and several ponies took quick notice of my drugged state. To this day I still don't know what that damn zebra put in my juice of all things, and the fact that I didn't taste anything in my juice...well, it was and still is impressive and scary in equal measure.

That striped bartender didn't delay in getting me away from the bar, and I didn't put two and two together until he carried me into one of the back rooms, away from prying eyes. That was when that fucker started trying to undress me, and I was so damn gone that I put up a token resistance at best. Using magic? Give me a break. I couldn't even clearly make out the small room I was in, let alone focusing on blasting his face inside-out.

He didn't get very far. He'd barely managed to unbutton my pants when there was a sudden hard bang against the door, followed by a second hit. The lock he'd flipped did nothing as Octavia's hindhooves slammed into it and broke it clean off the frame, judging by the sound of splintering wood and the loud bang of the door falling to the floor.

There was a moment of silence after that, and I tried to roll my head to see where Octavia was, but that just made the world spin more. I groaned weakly and pawed at the side of the sofa I'd been laid on, taking deep breaths to steady myself.

"You fuckin' what?!"

Did I forget to mention she's really, really cockney? Because she is, even years after leaving Trottingham behind.

She was on him in a second. She'd gotten faster compared to back when I'd fought with her. I couldn't clearly make out what was happening, but I could hear it and I could feel it. There was a brief moment of struggle, before someone slammed into the far wall of the room, and the dull, but reverberating bang of Octavia's hoof meeting his pinned muzzle was hard and loud enough that I actually felt the vibrations from the impact on top of hearing it.

Then she proceeded to repeat those motions all over his body, calling him everything from a gutter-trash wanker to a child-raping twat that needed to be strung up by his balls and beaten with various blunt instruments. I do believe she also insinuated he needed a cactus shoved up his ass. I dunno, I was drugged with something pretty hardcore, so a lot of that evening is extremely fuzzy to me.

By the time she was done with him, he was out cold and probably half the bones in his body were broken. She had her ponies haul his ass out back, where I believe he was arrested for attempting to force himself on one of the club's patrons. I didn't come forward as a first-hoof witness because of my age, but I think it got the message across. He definitely didn't have a job, and you can be sure that I tracked him down once I was better and made the bastard disappear. Easy target, he didn't even have family or a marefriend that would miss him. Well, maybe he did back in Zebrica, buuuut eh.

After that, things got fuzzy until I found myself waking up in an unfamiliar place. Vinyl was a surprisingly private mare back then, and even I hadn't ever seen the inside of her apartment. She lived in a newer high-rise apartment, at least that's what everyone thought. It was close to the edge of the Red District, but far enough from certain activities for her to, in her own words, 'broaden her creative mind'.

The details of the inside of the apartment weren't as important to me at the time as the fact that my stomach didn't agree with me sitting up so quickly. The world was still spinning, and my equilibrium was so thrown off, I had no choice but to vomit. For all I knew, I'd already done that several times.

I struggled to get out from a set of covers that someone had thrown over me, and I found myself tumbling off of a sofa. I hit the floor and groaned, gurgling and wobbling my head to and fro. There was a bucket sitting right in front of me. I latched onto it and, with one final burst of strength, pulled myself up into a partially sitting position, and dry-heaved into it over and over.

"Hey! Whoa whoa, easy there Sparky," I heard someone say just barely, over the loud sound of me retching. "Hold on, I'll be-ah, fuck me arse, c'mon....!"

I attempted to hurl against my will once more, and several times after that before I felt somepony's hoof on my back, gently rubbing over the muscles there. It was surprisingly more soothing than most would expect, especially since I have a bit of an aversion to being touched unexpectedly.

"S'right mate, let it out, yer alright...."

I coughed and sputtered a few times, spitting out what little amount of nastyness reached my mouth before I even dared to speak. "Wh-why...I know I ate-!"

"Ipecac!" I heard Octavia say suddenly, patting my back a few times. "Had ta get that garbage outta yer gut."

"...Oh. Makes sense."

"What, you don't remember? Oh well. Better than gettin' yer stomach pumped, that's for sure," she said, glancing past the couch for a moment. "Sorry about the smell by the way. Cookin' dinner for Vine."

"Yeah, the smell-urp!-sucks, but I'll deal," I muttered, catching a whiff of cooked vegetables. "Feel sick, but also hungry and really thirsty. That's weird."

"Yeah, yer a weird pony, so everything's right in the world," she said bemusedly, stepping away from me. "Lay back down and rest yer 'ead. I'll getcha some water."

"Just hope I can keep it down."

I slowly crawled my way back onto the couch, the world still spinning a whole lot more than I was comfortable with. I tried to use my magic to pull the cover over myself again, but all I did was grab some bottle off of the kitchen counter (apparently) and twirl it around in the air before dropping it to the floor. It broke with a resounding shattering noise.

"Oi! Fuckin' 'ell, Sparky!"

"Sorry, sorry! Tried to use my magic-"

"Well maybe ya shouldn't!"

"I probably shouldn't."

"Too right. Fuckin' tosser...."

I could hear her sweeping up the mess I'd made. Looking back, that whole evening spent at Vinyl's apartment was kinda awkward. I was almost a hundred percent sure I was intruding on very personal space. Not like, getting too close to either of them. No, it was rare that either of them let anyone come to this apartment. Either they considered me a very good friend and they trusted me enough to let me in here, or Octavia just felt she had no other choice.

Either way, it was only after Octavia brought me my water that it occurred to me that my pants were zipped up and buttoned once more...and I'm pretty sure it wasn't me that did that. Alarms went off in my head, and I drank about half of my cup of water before I spoke up about it.

"Hey, uh...were you the one that buttoned up my pants?"

"All that happened to ya an' yer pants are what you think about?" she mused, while the resounding chop-chop-chop of a knife against a cutting board sounded off. "You got strange priorities, Sparky."

"Did you, though?"

"...Yeah. Why? You thinkin' I'm some pervert?" she asked, the chopping stopping for a moment.

I groaned out a weak laugh and shook my head just a little bit. I regretted the motions immediately.

"Urp! N-no, just uh..." I tried to say, clearing my throat. "You didn't see anything, did you?"

"Well I didn't see nothin', but I certainly felt somethin' by accident," she said, setting her knife down and walking over to lean over the back of the couch, looking down at me. "Pretty sure you ain't no colt, so I'm just guessin' yer like me aunt. Don't worry, mum's the word on it."

"Uhhh...that means you won't tell anypony, right?"

Octavia actually giggled at that. "Right, Canterlotian. Yeah, means I won't tell anyone."

"'Kay then."

I didn't push for much else. I was way too wasted and out of it to really make sure that she wouldn't say anything, and it was really weird to hear her giggle. I wonder if she realized she'd even done it to begin with. There are certain comforts you indulge in at home, away from prying eyes, that you would never do in public. Considering she ran a gang, giggling is just one of those things that Octavia didn't do.

As it turned out, there was a lot I and a lot of other ponies didn't understand about the two of them at the time. Especially Vinyl's fans, oh wow, they could be vocal about their opinions. Comes with the territory, really. You can't be a star and avoid getting numerous fans that want to tell you how to live your life.

Both she and Octavia come under a ton of criticism, mostly Octavia, because of how much of a gold-digger Octavia is. What? It's not like Octavia doesn't know it. She's very aware of what she wants, and what she wants is everything Vinyl has to offer. Her body, her money, and however cheesy it may sound, her heart. Of course, ponies also criticized that Octavia was just leeching off of Vinyl's fame to become more popular in the music industry herself, but both Vinyl and Octavia told her fans to go fuck themselves whenever they brought that up.

It became all too apparent to me when I woke up next. My vision had stabilized, and apparently several hours had passed, because I needed to go to the bathroom, and those two were curled up in front of Vinyl's television, sides pressed together and Vinyl's head laid against the floor, calmly snoozing away while Octavia used the back of her neck as a headrest.

The TV's volume had been turned down to the point of almost being inaudible to me, and their bowl of popcorn was nearly empty. Now that I could see straight, I took the time to gather my thoughts, the only light source being the black-and-white screen of the television itself. I had to wonder why they didn't head to bed, but eh.

The apartment itself was a big open studio-like area when it came to the living room. The kitchen was attached to it, just behind the couch. Kinda weird when you think about it, but what do I know about modern home design? I'm a mage, not a happy home designer. Speaking of the kitchen, they had left their dinner plates on the kitchen table, uncleaned. My eye twitched when I noticed, sitting up on the couch. I hated it when ponies did that.

It seemed like a good thing to do for them, at least. They put me up in their place when they didn't have to, and this place was...well, I looked around, and the walls were littered with various art pieces, but here and there, there were photos of both of them together. Very few of them had either of the mares alone. Course, there wasn't much in the way of light at all, so I might've been wrong. In any case, I lit a dim light on my horn and slowly, quietly climbed off the couch and gave the sleeves of my top a testing tug with my magic to make sure I could control it before going to work on the dishes.

I tried to be as quiet as I possibly could, but how to you be quiet with a sponge, glass dishes and a draining rack? You have to stack the plates on top of each other, inevitably something's going to clink together far too loud to be missed in a household that's deathly silent. Even my magic couldn't secure that, not in my state at the time, anyways. I was still very light-headed and I was having trouble focusing.

Inevitably, I heard one of them rouse from their slumber. Strangely enough it wasn't Octavia, considering she was the one sleeping on top of Vinyl somewhat. Instead, the alabaster mare wandered sleepily into the kitchen to see what I was up to, minus her shades. There was a really popular rumor a long while back that she suffered from a very specific form of albinism and her irises were a rich red color, which led to other rumors that she was some kind of vampony...I swear ponies are dumb as bricks sometimes. They're more of a rose tinge, really. Still, even that's a pretty rare eye color, so it was still a hit when she finally started taking her glasses off more often in public.

She rubbed at one of her eyes while looking at what I was doing, not like it wasn't obvious enough. I increased the brightness of my horn just a bit, enough to show her how my magic was working to clean up the pots and pans Octavia had used to cook dinner, and she just smiled at me. Honestly I really didn't know what to say to her, considering I was standing there in her home under dubious levels of permission. It wasn't like Octavia owned this place.

"You've got a really nice apartment," I muttered as quietly as I could afford to, my magic staying the course on the dishes while I spoke to her. "Really feels like yours and Octavia's place."

She smiled wider and gave me a quick nod, before lighting her horn and reaching out for her whiteboard. She'd gotten a simple enchantment placed on it so it was easy for her to know exactly where it was, within reason of course. It wasn't like it had massive range. She didn't need massive range. All she had to do was use a specific wavelength of magic she'd been taught, and she could feel it as long as it was within her reach.

She quickly wrote 'Thank you.' on the whiteboard when she'd brought it over to us, holding it up for me to see. She leaned to the side and watched the dishes pulling a Fantasia behind me, enthralled by my magic, and quickly scribbled 'Feeling better?' under what she'd previously written. Yes, I'm aware Fantasia came out like...well, I dunno, a few years later? Maybe ten or something? I did the dancing cleaning supplies schtick before it was cool.

"Uh, yeah, a lot better. Still really light-headed, but at least the universe isn't revolving around me anymore."

She nodded to that and used the eraser attached to the whiteboard to wipe it clean. She bit her lip and her ears lowered against her skull, while she rubbed the back of her neck with a hoof. If there was one thing you could say about Vinyl, it was that talking with her made you focus a bit more on how much she emoted everything she was feeling. It was almost like she did it to make up for the fact that she didn't have a voice.

'I am SO sorry.'

The squeak of the marker against the whiteboard drew my attention to it, and I quickly waved her off. "It wasn't your fault. How were you supposed to know? Not like he was going to tell you he was a rapist during the interview."

Vinyl quickly shook her head and erased the board again, writing down 'Normal bartender hired him. Gonna have a talk with him.' in its place.

"Hey, seriously, it's fine," I said, waving it off with a hoof. "I doubt he knew either. No reason to make a big deal about it."

'You almost got raped!' she wrote, visibly cringing at the thought of such a thing happening to anyone.

"Your point?"

'You're way too calm about that.'

I shrugged. "I'm jaded, I guess. I've seen a lot of shit. Please don't ask."

Her motions of erasing the whiteboard were almost second nature, I could tell. Her body didn't so much as flinch whenever she did it, and that's usually the sign that a unicorn's doing something with their magic that isn't practiced or completely natural to them. They usually shift their posture as they re-focus their thoughts on the more exact motions they're making with their magic, or their eyes dart down to whatever they're manipulating so they can make sure they can do it right. The fact that Vinyl just kinda did it without taking even a moment's pause spoke to how often she used it.

She began to write on it several times, the squeaking marker stopping suddenly so she can wipe the partially-written word away once more. Eventually she just sighed and nodded, leaving the whiteboard blank. We stood there in silence for a time, and she fidgeted as the uncomfortableness of the moment settled in. Great, now I'd made things awkward.

She glanced past me again, then smirked. 'Good magic.'

I looked back at the shuffling dishes, and grinned. "I'm Celestia's prized pupil. How could my magic not be good?"

She snorted and rolled her eyes. 'So humble, too.'

Perhaps it was childish of me, but I stuck my tongue out at her instead of properly responding like a mature adult...which I wasn't at the time, so hey! Totally appropriate. I looked past her in the direction of the television, and she glanced back, smiling just a bit to herself when she spotted Octavia's silhouetted form laid out comfortably in front of the TV.

"I've never seen you two like that. All..." I muttered, sitting down and bringing my forehooves closer together. "Close."

Vinyl stared at me for a moment before a look of dawning comprehension overtook her, and she rolled her eyes while nodding her head in Octavia's direction.

'Old habits,' she wrote quickly. 'Doesn't want to look soft.'

"Ah. Makes sense, I guess," I said, looking back at the dishes for a moment. They were just about done. "That explains why she's so forceful with you out in public."

Vinyl at least had the decency to blush at that. Neither of them even tried to hide just how promiscuous they could be, and Vinyl's passive behavior bordered on outright submissive when it came to giving Octavia what she wanted. One time while Vinyl was in the DJing booth, Octavia just stood in the doorway staring at her ass for like an hour before Vinyl took a break, and Octavia hauled her off to one of the staff rooms in the back. Everyone in the back area heard what happened next...and I'll leave that to your imagination. Just keep in mind that Vinyl can't actually vocalize her pleasure, and you might have some idea of who was being the loud one.

'Not something I should be talking to a kid about.' she wrote slowly, rubbing the back of her head.

I just quirked a brow at her. "If you seriously think I haven't had sex yet, you really don't know me very well."

She stared at me for a moment before raising the whiteboard up again, writing quickly onto it. Everything about her posture told me she was very uncomfortable with where this conversation was going.

'Not gonna ask.'

"Probably a good thing. I warned you not to!"

She nodded and let out a soft sigh of relief that I wasn't pushing the matter. For a mare that grew up in the Red District, she was strangely timid about things of a sexual nature, despite her passive exhibitionism. Seriously, I'd overheard some things from Octavia before. The things they get up to when they think they can get away with it, especially inside Vinyl's club....

The dishes finished up with a final clink of a ceramic plate against one of the pots. Gotta hoof it to Octavia, for a street mare she really knew how to cook. I mean, I dunno what she made for dinner, but there were a lot of pots and pans I had to wash. Not that it took much effort, magic and all that. Kinda makes a lot of tasks pretty trivial.

"So I guess there's more to your relationship than what you show in public?" I asked, looking around for a towel.

Vinyl solved that problem for me, and even walked over to help me as I began to dry off each of the dishes. Do you have any idea how moldy draining racks can be? It's disgusting. I don't leave dishes in draining racks for very long because of it, if only to avoid letting water stagnate in the bottom of it. Just the thought makes me shudder.

She used her hooves to dry the dishes in quick, circular motions while her magic held the whiteboard up.

'Yes. Octavia is perfect.' she wrote while smiling wistfully down at the plate in her hooves.

"Nopony's perfect." I retorted, setting one dish down and picking up another.

Vinyl shook her head and smiled a little wider. 'Perfect in all her imperfections.'

"Ah," I hummed, pondering on that while my magic kept working at the dish floating in front of me. "I think I get what you mean."

'Octavia = muse. Only one for me,' she wrote quickly, the corners of her eyes curling upward, joining in on what looked like such a beaming smile. 'I will give her everything, if that's what it takes.'

I stared at her for a moment, taken aback by the sincerely happy look in her eyes. "I...can't imagine what it feels like."

Her eraser finished scrubbing away the words on the whiteboard so she could write more, and she nodded to me. 'Neither did I, until I met the real Octavia. Hiding behind the crass comments and tough exterior.'

"That sounds really nice...I'm happy for you."

'If you're lucky," she wrote, giving me a sly wink. 'You'll know what it feels like one day.'

I snorted at that and shrugged a little. "Maybe."

We continued drying off the dishes in silence, the idle clink of ceramic against metal the only sounds heard from the kitchen until we heard the light clip-clop of hooves behind us. We both looked back to see a drowsy Octavia walking over to us in the dim light from our horns.

"What're you two poppets doin' in 'ere?" she asked just before covering up a yawn with her hoof.

'Dishes.' Vinyl wrote, turning the board towards Octavia to let her see.

"In the middle of the night? Right daft, you two," she mumbled, walking up behind Vinyl and pressing her chest against Vinyl's back. I respectfully kept my eyes on the pot I was drying. "C'mon Vine, let's hop off to bed then. M'knackered an' I want cuddles."

It took her a moment to process what she'd just said in front of me. Vinyl suppressed a breathy laugh while waiting for the gears to turn in Octavia's sleepy head. Once things finally clicked into place, she gave me one of the most tired glares I've ever seen.

"You know what's good for ya, you'll keep yer flappin' gob shut and pretend you didn't hear nothin'." she muttered, before nudging Vinyl's neck with her muzzle.

I just gave her a simple nod, and she and Vinyl headed off to bed. That was one of the first times I'd really gotten a glimpse at the 'real Octavia' as Vinyl had put it, and I was glad to see that there was more to her than being wild and rough around the edges. That wasn't entirely my focus at the time though.

The way they walked together, the way Octavia pressed against Vinyl's side and nuzzled her with such tender motions while Vinyl's tail curled ever-so-slightly around Octavia's...it unsettled me. Not because the idea of them being so in love was disturbing to me, but I couldn't deny the ache I felt deep down. As I walked back into the living room, shut the television off and climbed back onto the sofa, I realized that I envied them. I didn't sleep well the rest of the night.

I was convinced that I could never feel what that was like. I couldn't afford it, not with what I had planned.

Either way, I eventually fell asleep after a time of rolling over again and again. It really shouldn't have effected me as much as it did, but as much as I say I couldn't allow myself something like that, that didn't mean I didn't want it. It's one thing to read about ponies waxing poetic about matters of the heart in trashy romance novels, but to hear it and see it first-hoof, to see the look in Vinyl's eyes and how they just lit up with life the moment Octavia drew near...I dunno. I'm still a mare despite my bits down there, how could I not want something that seems so wonderful?

I think I got...huh. I got really off-track with that. It's one of my fonder memories, despite what almost happened to me back then. It was my first time seeing true love in such a pure and undiluted form. No frills or excess, just two ponies that fit together like pieces in a jigsaw puzzle. Sometimes I get lost reminiscing about it.

Octavia earned my trust through Vinyl that night. I saw more to her, and when I woke up that morning I felt awful from the drug siphoning out of my system, and I didn't want Spike to see me like that, so I asked Octavia if she could check in with Spike's foalsitter and make sure things are alright. I just needed time to get some liquids in me and get some food in my stomach so I could recover a bit better. Some aspirin helped too.

I found out later that Spike found her accent and unusual form of speech very amusing. He didn't understand any of her slang at the time.

It became a thing that I asked her to do, whenever I left town without Spike in tow. It didn't happen very often while I was Celestia's student, but when it did, I could count on her to keep an eye on things, even though I made a point of hiring a dedicated foalsitter during those times. She was reliable, and I paid her well for doing that for me. She didn't need the money, but I happen to have principles, thank you very much.

With that being said, you can probably guess why I was standing outside of the club. I had already made sure to get my other affairs in order, so I just needed somepony to keep an eye on Spike and make sure the foalsitter I hired didn't flake out on me and shirk her duties while I was out. I am very serious when it comes to making sure my little drake is safe and secure.

The club was a very different place earlier in the day. Workers milled about, cleaning things up, wiping down the tables and replacing any broken chairs any particularly rowdy customers managed to break the night before. The place never really closed down, it just kinda shifted between mellow after-party clean-up and hardcore music haven. Actually, during the daytime the bar attracted a lot of more artsy types, ones that just wanted to chill and talk shop. Then there were ponies like me that just liked the atmosphere and having a place to get a good drink and possibly even better company.

When I entered, I could hear the familiar sound of an acoustic guitar being played, along with several other instruments. As I stepped into the main area of the club, I could see Octavia and a few others all set up together near the dance floor, all playing a song together while pretty much everypony except the workers went silent and stopped what they were doing to listen to them play.

Octavia's a bit remarkable in the sense that, with some practice, she excels with just about any stringed instrument. It doesn't take her long to pick them up. I've seen her play violin, guitar, I think she even played a harp once, though don't ask me where she even got a freakin' harp from. Those things are expensive and ridiculously difficult to play so well, so I don't know where or when she got the practice in.

I walked over to the bar and took a seat next to some mare wearing a beret and some black eyeliner, her eyes closed and her back pressed up against the edge of the bar counter while she listened to the song. I just ordered some brandy and let myself take in the atmosphere. I wasn't in any particular rush, so I didn't feel a need to try to draw Octavia out of her performance. I mean yeah, it was pretty early to be drinking, but eh.

When they wrapped things up, calm whoops and applause sounded off from the crowd, forehooves clopping together in a quiet praise of the band's efforts. Octavia bowed, and I joined in on the applause while she and her small group began to put their instruments away. You might think it's really odd that someone like her would be able to play such relaxing music, but she's a mare full of surprises.

I waited for a bit while another small band took their place, playing an odd polka tune, far more upbeat and energetic. They at least succeeded in getting quite a few of the ponies in the room whooping and clopping their hooves in rhythm with them. Well, at least these artsy types were young enough to not have their heads stuck so far up their asses they can't undo their ties and have a little fun. Personally, polka's not really my thing.

It at least made good background music while I enjoyed my brandy. Not the sort of thing I usually drink, but it sounded good at the time. Kinda like how taking that hit of E the previous night sounded like a good idea. Reality could've had it go either way, and luck favored the bold this time around. It's not something I make a habit out of.

Eventually though, just as I was finishing my drink, Octavia plunked herself down in the seat next to mine, on the other side of me.

"Oi, barky! Gimme some water, I'm parched!"

I looked over at her with a smirk. "You could ask nicely, you know."

"Yeah, I could," she said, rolling her eyes and looking in my direction. "'Sup, Sparky?"

"Not much, just enjoying a drink at an entirely inappropriate time of day," I muttered, turning in my seat to face her. "What about you? I expected you to be off somewhere making goo-goo eyes at Vinyl's sexy ass."

"Okay one, only reason I'm not doing exactly that is because Vine's back at home cookin' up a new song," she said, huffing a bit. "Two, that sounds a whole lot like you've been lookin' at my mare's ass. You been havin' fantasies about my mare, Sparky? That it?"

"Pff-whaaaat? No, no no no..." I said, barely holding back a grin. "Not while you're in swinging range, anyways."

I ducked my head as she reached to smack the back of it, only to find that she'd predicted the motion ahead of time. Soon, my eyeballs rattled in my head as she whacked the back of my head hard enough to make my head jerk forward, almost hitting my horn on the bar counter.

"That's for bein' a twat. Be glad you're me mate, or it'd be worse. Might be leavin' a piece of yer horn in the counter," she teased, gladly accepting her water when the bartender walked over to give it to her. "So then! What's got you down here this time o' day, tryin' to get pissed?"

I rubbed the back of my head with a small wince. That'd leave a bump. "Get pissed? I'm not-oh, right, pissed. Nah, just having a drink while I waited for you. Wanted to ask if you could check in with Spike for a couple weeks."

"Oh, same old? Easy money, sure, I can do it," she muttered, tipping her water back and chugging some of it down. "The usual? Show up randomly, three or four times a week?"

"Yup."

"Cool, alright. Got permission to kick the foalsitter's stupid arse if she cocks her job up?"

"Mmmhmm."

Octavia knew I was joking of course, just as much as I knew she was joking. She also knew that if the foalsitter didn't perform to expectations, such as leaving my son unattended for an hour, she'd have to take over and get in contact with me as quickly as possible, if she even could at all. It was a simple job, and she got paid the same either way, so it all worked out in my favor.

"Sounds aces as usual. So, where you buggerin' off to this time? Prance? Manehattan?" she asked, drinking her water at a more sedate pace while leaning her weight against the countertop more, a foreleg folded under her to brace herself.

I didn't miss a beat, downing the last dregs of my brandy. "Heading to Stalliongrad, actually."

"That shithole? The fuck ya goin' there for?" she asked, a glimmer of concern welling up in those normally confident eyes.

"Business. I don't want to rely on the family fortune anymore, so I'm going there to invest in small businesses. Nothing too spectacular."

I wasn't exactly lying, if you replace 'invest' with 'buy', and 'small businesses' with 'extremely illegal operations that the Stalliongrad Police aren't equipped to properly shut down'. Honestly, I was being entirely truthful if you look at it that way. Not my fault she didn't catch my meaning, sheesh!

I mean, there's also the fact that I fully intended to actually invest in some of the more legitimate businesses out there, but that's not important.

"Still, Stalliongrad? Goin' there's like dippin' yer stick in the filthiest quim you can find and expecting it ta turn out ace, let alone doing business there," she said, blech'ing to herself. "That was a nasty analogy."

"Your words, not mine." I muttered, setting my empty glass down, slipping one of the ice cubes into my mouth and crunching it down.

"Too right. I'm all buggered up for that one."

"Eh, I've heard worse. Anyway, Stalliongrad's a decent opportunity because even after over two-hundred years, that place is still trying to claw its way out of the situation it was in back then," I said, shrugging a little. "Plenty of money-making opportunities there, long as you don't plan on being a billionaire from said opportunities."

"True. Why start small though? You got more bits than brains, an' that's sayin' lots."

I made a rotating motion with my hoof. "Too much competition and rich ponies in the big cities for me to make any real cash. Plus I'm looking for something specific in Stalliongrad. Something I can really corner the market on, if there's anything left."

"Well, ponies don't like goin' there for any reason, so I guess you're on the right track. Good luck to ya, mate."

With that taken care of, I went through the simple motions of getting myself a new pair of pistols and cleaning up my spare revolver once I got home, down in my lab. I would need to keep them on me if I planned on staying safe in Stalliongrad. Magic works for a lot of things, but there's no telling which will be faster: your magic, or a bullet. Best to cover all bases in that regard.

As the day dragged on, I retrieved my toolbox from one of the shelves in my lab and removed the nails in an older section of the basement that I hadn't converted into a part of my lab. I pulled the wood boards away carefully and reached inside to open an old safebox I'd kept locked away there, and pulled out a decently-sized suitcase.

Contrary to what some may think, Equestria doesn't rely purely on sacks of bits to pay for things. We do have such things as credit and paper money. I mean, can you imagine carrying around giant bags of solid fucking gold just to make a business transaction? First of all, you'd break your spine, and second of all, your ass would get mugged. You may as well carry around a giant neon sign that says 'I can barely walk let alone run, and I'm probably exhausted from carrying all this money around, rob me please'.

However, that doesn't mean paper money's very widespread. It's moreso for ponies that have more bits than they could ever carry around, ponies that do big business and make large transactions. Considering I had a suitcase full of the stuff, that should tell you exactly how much I had stowed away for emergencies and future plans.

I didn't intend to do anything massive with this trip, aside from securing my own sources of income, both legitimate and illegal. However, I had my eyes peeled for some muscle, and perhaps if I was lucky, my intended contact would be willing to work with me as well. Time would tell, as it often does.

I hammered the boards back into place, making sure to put the nails exactly where they'd been before in the boards so as not to make it obvious something was hidden back there, and returned to my lab, setting the suitcase down in the corner under where I usually keep my labcoats hung up. I lit my horn and pulled several folders out of a hidden storage area in the bottom of one of the storage cabinets, setting them down on a workstation and flipping them open, pulling several of the papers out of them. They were the profiles I'd personally recorded of various targets I'd need to take out to do any real damage to the Mafia's operations.

There were three primary targets in my plans, priority targets that, if the opportunity presented itself, I needed to eliminate with extreme prejudice. Beyond that, I had numerous other Officers working for the Mafia that needed to be taken care of, though their level of importance had likely changed over the years.

First was Deep Scarlet, a Magister that worked for the one that came after me, and a mare with the most pornstar name ever. Or perhaps the leading female role in a Con Mane film. I still can't believe somepony got away with naming one of the characters in one of those movies Pussy Galore. I let Spike watch that movie before I heard about that!

Scarlet was a prodigy in her own right, with her sharp and calculating mind. Very few ponies could match her level of focus when it came to magic. She also had an extremely rare color of magic, thus the origin of her name. She was in charge of the Mafia's finances, with the vast majority of her time being put into streamlining Manehattan's businesses to ensure the Mafia made as much money as possible. She was ruthless, merciless, and saw even her own ponies as nothing more than numbers.

Then there was the Magister's son, Turning Spell. The strange name came from the exotic reverse fluting of his horn, though I still feel it's a bit of a stretch. Very few know who his Mother was, and it's a sore subject for his Father, so he rarely ever brought it up. He wasn't exactly a target like Deep Scarlet was, and that was because he once had a fiance he planned to elope with. He never wanted anything to do with his Father's Mafia dealings. Then one day both he and his fiance disappeared, and when he finally reappeared, he was quiet and curt, and very withdrawn. Now he does whatever daddy tells him to do. I think he senses foul play as much as I did back then.

Finally, my main target. The one that matters more than anypony else. I've been avoiding saying his name because his name still pisses me off something fierce, really gets my blood boiling.

Magister Weaving Thought.

...Sorry, just needed to take a deep breath and let it out. Anyways. He was the one responsible for the pony I became. He was the one responsible for destroying my foalhood before it ever had a chance to be a thing. I hated him, I despised everything about him, and I couldn't wait to kill him, preferably in the most slow and agonizing way possible, starting with the removal of his horn. Preferably with a dulled hacksaw, so it takes me forever to really cut through it.

It would take time to find a chance to get to any of them. As I said, I needed new intel, current information about the Mafia, so most of the profiles I'd written down didn't matter much anymore. For all I knew, half of them were dead. Until I was able to confirm that though, I'd be hanging on to them.

I stared at the papers for a moment, sliding them back into their folders and holding them up in my magic. I could still turn back and leave all of this alone. I could just live my life and leave the Mafia be. It wouldn't be hard...but that was rarely how I did things. Twilight Sparkle doesn't back down like a coward. I put the folders back where I'd gotten them from and went back upstairs with the suitcase in tow, packing my things in preparation for my trip.

Time to get to work.

Author's Note

For those of you who don't understand the reference with Octavia's gang name....

Coda ˈkoːda is a term used in music primarily to designate a passage that brings a piece (or a movement) to an end.

Y'all can thank Lithe for the pure genius that is that gang name. I already thanked him of course, so you all go do that too!

Music this time around?

It felt more appropriate for the more mellow daytime hours of Vinyl's club. Also, all you British readers that I may or may not have? I'm sorry.

Chapter 15 - The Old Hunter

written by Fire Soul

I left that same night without much fuss. It wasn't particularly hard to get a train ticket, and while first-class accommodations are preferred for long overnight trips like the one I was in for, I was perfectly fine with sleeping on my bench. Not like I had to worry about staying sat up, not many ponies took the train I was on.

Trains weren't too big a deal to me, though I made sure to keep my suitcase close. You never know when you're being targeted, and while I heavily doubted that anypony knew exactly what was in that second smaller suitcase of mine, it always paid to be cautious. The calm rumble of the train moving along the tracks was actually a good way to lull me to sleep, and the night passed me by rather quickly thanks to it.

Unfortunately, even first-class didn't have a whole lot of insulation to make the last dregs of this trip more comfy, despite the sun just starting to peek over the horizon. I woke up and shivered at the chill in the air, but for the most part my suit and my fur, thin as it was, helped to keep me warm enough. I grabbed the coat I'd brought along from my luggage and slipped it over myself, the black coat hanging low and partially covering my hindlegs when I stood up.

My first stop was Ice Shade Station, an old military outpost that got turned into a kind of crossroads location for trains to pass through. It was located close to the Frozen North, but not quite so far that way that my balls would be tucking back into my body just to stay warm. On the contrary, Ice Shade Station was located in the middle of a decently-sized forest, not particularly thin in trees, but not immensely overgrown either. The outpost was originally built to be a kind of scouting base for ponies to work out of, using the forest as good cover, but as Equestria's borders expanded, it became far less useful as an outpost, and got repurposed into what it is now.

I would have taken some other way to Stalliongrad if there were any other options, and if I didn't have business there. This old outpost was and still is far more popular than most others, because it's the only connecting point between the more hospitable center of Equestria and areas closer to the Frozen North. Because of that, you can bet your ass that the hotel they've got out here is...well, not first-rate overall, but the staff certainly are! They usually have to keep up with a large crowd going to and from the shithole that is Stalliongrad, among several other locations.

I mean I suppose I could've gotten a chariot ride, but that would be equal amounts arrogant and stupid of me. Do you have any idea how cold it gets, as high up as those things tend to fly? I don't care how insulated the chariot is and how contained it is, temperatures can get below celsius this far north and last I checked, I wasn't a cold-resistant pegasus. Plus, I'm heading into the poorest city of Equestria. How much of an asshole would I be, showing up in a big fancy chariot? It's not like I wanted to announce my presence to everyone anyways. I was traveling pretty low-key, all things considered.

I pulled my coat a little tighter around myself as I stepped off the train, and thankfully, the forest was doing a wonderful job to act as a windbreaker for the outpost. The wind was always what got me when it started getting colder outside, especially when I was younger. Even with as cold as it was, I could smell the tall pines growing all around the area, clouds of breath billowing out from my nostrils with every exhale.

The hotel was accommodating as it had always been, though if they recognized me from back when I was a little filly, they made no mention of it. They had a unique setup, allowing for temporary rentals of their rooms for traveling ponies that weren't planning on staying overnight. Way too cold to just let ponies stand around outside in the cold while waiting for their trains.

I got my room and took the time to brush my teeth, take a shower and get some breakfast in me. After that, well...I was mostly just hoping to find a way to kill some time. There was supposed to be a train heading for Stalliongrad later that evening, and that left me some time to track down my contact. There wasn't any particular rush to finding him just yet, I could always try to track him down more thoroughly on the way home, but I had little else to do at the time, so why shouldn't I try to find him?

Thing was, as I learned after working with him a few times, he was a hunter. Remember how I mentioned that ponies don't usually get into that sort of thing? Well, he was one of the few that still made a living off of it. Really, the wilds were his bread and butter.

I spent a couple hours of the morning in the hotel's lounge. Given it was the only hotel in this crossroads location, it shouldn't surprise you to find out that this place is amazingly big. While it wasn't common for them to have a lot of travelers staying there all at once, it did happen once in a while, usually around the time festivals and holidays came around. Once those times hit, well...this place became a lot more energetic.

As it stood, I found myself kicking back in the lounge, chatting up a rather attractive young mare while enjoying one of my cigars and having a few drinks, the gentle hum of jazz music making for a lovely backdrop to it all. Nothing too strong, I needed my mental faculties present later in the afternoon, but for now it was nice. The mare wasn't exactly stunning, but she had that cute kind of charm to her. I'd give her a seven out of ten. Above average, but nothing stellar. I suppose I could only be thankful she didn't recognize me, and I was in no hurry to let her know she was being hit on by a brand-new hero of Equestria.

I went out for lunch around noon, leaving the pleasantly light music and chatter of the hotel lounge behind in favor of finding a smaller establishment to grab something a little more low-class. Seriously, I love hayburgers. You don't even understand, alright? Hayburgers and I have a relationship going on, and it's very intimate in nature. I know hayburger is bad for me, but I loooove her!

Ahem. Anyways....

After lunch, I whiled away my time walking around the town. Yeah, it was cold out, but I'm not some prissy wimp that can't handle a little icy chill. The old outpost was charming in its own way. 'Charmingly rustic', as Fancy Pants often said about such places. The buildings were old, many of them still built out of old logs and only updated with fresh insulation to keep the wind out. I wonder if those buildings still burned wood for warmth? I couldn't exactly just wander into one of those houses and check.

There was a specific time and place I had in mind, and once three o' clock neared, I headed straight for a small-time bar near the outskirts of the town. There were maybe three in the entire town, but this one was special. It was discreet, and it was a favorite place to burn away what remained of the day after hunters get paid for their hard work. That was where I needed to be between three and three-thirty, just to be sure.

I didn't order a drink this time around. I'd already drank enough earlier that day, and I was already feeling slightly buzzed from it. You know, that slackening of muscle sensation you get, similar to soreness, but it fades as you adjust to it. At least I didn't feel light-headed. The crowd inside wasn't anything special, though there were a couple of drunk ponies milling around. Not quite the crowd I was waiting for.

That, of course, didn't stop one of the stallions from hitting on me. Blatantly, and clumsily. Plus, I think he was in his thirties. I'm all for older stallions as much as I'm for older mares, but when they're so drunk that they go beyond 'breaking down inhibitions' and they enter 'saying really stupid slurred shit they'd never normally consider acceptable if they were even remotely sober' territory, that's when my pussy dries up.

I had to rebuke his advances five times before the bartender stepped in because he was starting to make a scene about it. I guess a stallion like him didn't take rejection very well. One of his work buddies finally came over to try to make him stop, and he actually took a swing at the guy. That was the only swing he took before I nailed him square in the jaw from his blind spot. It's the ones you don't see coming that knock you to the floor and keep you there.

I gave the valiant gentlecolt a wink and blew a kiss his way, and the way his cheeks lit up brought a smile to my muzzle. Stallions, I swear.

Only a few minutes after he'd carted his unconscious friend out the front door, a certain group of hard-working wilderness enthusiasts came around, boisterous and loud about the game they'd caught out in the forest. One of them even had the essence of a Timberwolf's eyes stored in a glass vial.

See, hunting's a bit different in Equestria. Unlike other parts of the world, we tend to have recurring monster problems. Manticores, hydras, quarray eels, tatzlworms...the list goes on. Unlike places like the Griffonstone Empire, hunting here isn't just hunting wild game for food. Hunting's become more of a pest control service, if you consider a hydra a 'pest'. Usually that sort of thing is relegated to the Royal Guard and the military to help them keep their recruits sharp and capable, but in some places, the old job of a hunter is still alive and well. Ice Shade Station pays particularly well for hunters to keep the timberwolf population thinned out, lest they begin to encroach upon the town.

I mean, there's still normal hunting, but considering the majority population of Equestria consists of herbivores, it's far less common than monster hunting.

The group consisted of a hodgepodge cadre of pegasi, unicorns, earth ponies, two zebra and a minotaur. It wasn't very often you saw a minotaur outside of their Republic, but they were definitely quite an asset in that job. If there was any creature in the world that could match a trained earth pony in physical prowess, it'd be those hulking beasts. Plus they've got actual physical hands, and as has been stated previously, that's a remarkable advantage over ponies.

It only took a couple minutes for their rowdy nature to die down, and moments after that, someone sat down next to me. I mean, someone was already seated on the other side of me, and making conversation with one of the mares next to him, but the pegasus that sat down and ordered a whiskey on my left was the one that mattered.

A dark gray coat of fur, marred with signs of scars and covered in splinters from what was no doubt a recent skirmish with a rogue group of timberwolves, covered his entire body. Guess none of them got a chance to wash up before going out for drinks. Par for the course, in other words. His mane and tail were a rather lovely shade of royal blue, it mixed wonderfully with his fur color.

The feathers of his wings were what earned him his name. Closer to the base they appeared the same color as his fur, but just after the base, they began to blacken in color, reaching a total pitch-black at the tips. His parents named him Shady Wings because of it. Can't blame them, it sounded appropriate, and why wouldn't you emphasize such a unique part of your son's anatomy? It was something to be proud of, very fetching. If circumstances had been different between us, I'd have taken him for a ride years ago.

He had a form-hugging suit covering his barrel, a set of leather armor, but what kind I couldn't tell. It was of a darker purple color, bordering on black, and it looked particularly thick. At his hip, a single low-caliber pistol sat secured in a leather holster, and another larger holster rested on his back, with straps keeping it firmly in place, secured tightly around his torso. It wasn't the same rifle I remember him having, far too shiny and new, but it was clearly some new model of hunting rifle.

I looked over at him, then reached over to knock on the leather armor. "Good stuff, feels solid. What is that, drake leather?"

"Hydra, actually. Wearing drake hide would be horrible," he muttered, taking a deep swig of his booze. "The fuck you doing here, Twitchy?"

Ugh, that fucking nickname. What's with ponies giving me nicknames all the time?! Is my name just that easy to make a nickname for? At least 'Twitchy Sparkle' was his invention instead of someone else's.

"Right to the point then," I muttered, turning and slipping out of my seat. "C'mon, let's talk somewhere a bit more quiet."

I could feel his eyes on me all the way out the door...along with a few others. I waited outside of the bar while some of the hunters gathered around the area made a fairly contained ruckus outside. I watched an earth pony challenge another to a hoof wrestle and win, and then a pegasus and a unicorn started up a drinking contest. Shame Shady stepped out just after it began. I didn't get to see how it ended.

Without a word, he led me around the side of the bar, out of sight between it and another, taller building. I couldn't make out any particular sounds, but something felt...off. I glanced back towards the entrance of the alleyway, and no one was following us, so....

I heard wings flapping in front of me, and I snapped my gaze forward just in time to see the barrel of a gun pointing directly between my eyes. Shady was just a few inches off the ground, wings working to keep him airborne while he leveled his pistol at me.

"Shady, why is there a gun in my face and why shouldn't I blast you halfway to windigo country for it?" I asked calmly, glaring up at him.

He scowled and pulled the hammer back on his pistol. "You made it real clear, last time we saw each other. You ever come here, I need to be real careful, 'cuz they might've found me out. That what this is, Twitchy? You here to clean up the mess you made?"

"I don't work for them anymore. If you picked up a newspaper, you'd know that."

"Papers can say a whole lot of bullshit, depending on who's in charge. I trust the news about as much as I trust you, no offense," he said, his gaze softening only for a moment. "You stuck your neck out for me, and swear to Celestia, I don't know why you did what you did, but I owe you for that. So you be straight with me Twitchy, and you tell me exactly why you're here, talkin' to me."

I stared at him for a moment, the tension of the situation almost palpable while I considered what to say. It wouldn't do to tell him all of my plans, but...the basis of it all might just be intriguing enough for him to cool his jets. I let out a small sigh and shrugged.

"I want to pick the Mafia apart, piece by piece, until there's nothing left," I said, looking directly at the gun. "Now can you get that stupid gun out of my face, you old fart?"

He looked at me like I'd grown a second head. I couldn't blame him for that. It took him a minute to decide whether or not I was actually telling him the truth before he pointed his gun away and lowered the hammer on his pistol so it didn't go off by accident.

"Well. Sure does sound like your kind of crazy," he muttered, shaking his head and holstering his weapon, landing in front of me. "Talk. Also, I'm only forty-six, you bitch."

"Not much to say," I muttered, reaching into the inside pocket of my suit to pull out my cigar case. "I want to take them down, piece by itty-bitty rotten piece, until I have all the information I need to expose them to the world. Want one?" I asked, floating two cigars out of my case and offering one of them to him.

He took the cigar in his hoof and turned it over a few times while I clipped my cigar case closed and tucked it away again. A quick flick of my magic sheared off the ends of both our cigars, and another burst lit them. He took a few puffs and I did the same, and soon the pleasant flavor of cherries assaulted our senses in the most deliciously acrid way possible.

He blew the smoke out into the air and removed the cigar from his mouth for a moment, looking down to it and humming his approval. "Damn fine brand you got here. Must've been expensive."

"Twenty bits each."

"Shit, Twitchy!"

I chuckled at his disbelief and rolled my eyes at him, letting a long puff of smoke billow out of the corner of my mouth. "Oh, relax! I wouldn't have offered one if I couldn't afford to share the wealth."

He looked down at the cigar, then back to me, his eyes darting back and forth between the two of us for a few moments. Eventually he shrugged it off and slipped the cigar between his lips once more, making a dismissive motion with his hoof next to himself. I heard some shuffling from above, and looked up just in time to spot the barrel of a rifle in someone's hands disappear past the edge of the roof.

"Huh. So, they work for you?" I asked, not turning my eyes away from the roofs.

He shook his head and stepped up next to the bar, raising up onto his hindlegs and leaning his back against the brick the building was made out of, idly puffing on his cigar.

"They work with me. Big difference," he said, smiling a little and tilting his head back to blow a line of smoke straight up into the air. "Advantage of having friends, Twitchy. I tell them someone's come lookin' for me, they've got my back without a word."

"Bit more than just friends, if you ask me. You're all a team," I said, joining him in leaning against the wall. "That's the kind of team I need."

He hah'ed and grinned a little. "You're gonna need more than just a team to take down the Mafia. Fuckin' crazy for even thinking you can pull it off. They're just about everywhere."

"Therein lies my advantage," I retorted. "I can come at them from so many different angles, they'll have a difficult time figuring out how to stop me. They block one avenue off, I work on three other openings."

"Sounds pretty vague. Nothing like the Twitchy I used to know."

I shrugged. "I don't have any current information to work with. All I've got is money at my disposal. I need ponies I can count on before I can even start."

"And you came looking for me...well, I'm flattered," he muttered, looking over at me. "What've you been up to, anyways? Must be doing well for yourself if you can afford cigars like these."

"You mean you don't know? Shit, I didn't think you were serious about what you said about the news."

"Yeah yeah, just gimme the short version."

"Well, let's see," I said with a smug smile. "I got out of the game."

"Mmmhmm."

"I tried to join the School for Gifted Unicorns and had a magic surge so titanic that I hatched a dragon egg, and the resulting hatchling is now officially my son."

"Mmmhm-wait, what?"

"Then Celestia took me on as her personal student."

"........"

I grinned at the dumbfounded look on his face. Oh, it was satisfying to see him in such disbelief! The cigar hung low from his mouth, his teeth barely keeping it in place.

"Aaand then Celestia's sister returned, I'm sure you heard about that at least."

"Yeah, kinda...kinda hard to miss night lasting way longer than it's supposed to." he mumbled, his eyes never once leaving me.

I nodded. "So, I went into the Everfree Forest with five mares I barely knew, we made our way to the old castle where Celestia and her sister used to rule Equestria from, and then discovered that we were all the Elements of Harmony," I explained quickly, looking at him with a playful smile. "We blasted her with a rainbow, helped her come to her senses after a thousand years of isolation, and now we're all heroes of Equestria."

"Uh...huh."

I nodded sagely and took a long drag of my cigar, slowly letting the smoke billow out of my nostrils a second later. "So that's what I've been up to."

"...I think I should go buy a newspaper," he said, narrowing his gaze at me suspiciously. "I feel like it'd spout far less bullshit at me."

"Fuck you." I responded curtly, my smile fading only a little.

We stayed there for a time in silence, just enjoying our cigars together for a time while he processed what I'd told him. His facial expressions ranged from thoughtful to disapproving, and after my cigar was about halfway down, maybe a little past that, he finally spoke up again.

"Twitchy...if you're out of the game, why would you ever get involved in any of that again? If you're not bullshitting me."

I shrugged at the question. "Because I'm nuts?"

"I'm being serious."

I nodded and pulled my cigar case out, dousing the fire on the end of my cigar with my magic and tucking it away right where I'd gotten it from in the first place.

"I hate them all, Shady. I hate them with every fiber of my being and I want to burn them all at the stake for ruining my life," I stated firmly, looking up at the sky. "The fact that the world would be better off without them is just a happy bonus."

"Yeah, but you got a kid now. You got...shit, you're the Princess's student, and you saved the world!" he exclaimed, looking down at his almost-gone cigar. "Why would you even consider getting into that again?"

"I just told you why."

"Yeah, and you seem to think that's enough for me to just uproot myself and help you out."

I sighed slowly and thunked the back of my head against the side of the building. "Every time I look at Spike, I think of what they might try to do to him to get to me. Maybe they'll attempt to recruit him, or they might try to turn his mistakes into blackmail to keep him under their control. Just another political pawn for them to use until they've gotten all they want or need out of him. Then they'd kill him, if they could get away with it."

"Spike?"

"My son."

"...Ah. Now see, that line of thinking makes a little more sense," he muttered, crossing his forelegs over his chest. "Strange to see you being all maternal."

I closed my eyes and nodded. "I know. It's just...they got to ruin my life because someone didn't stop them last generation. If I gave up on the idea just because my life's going great now, I'd be welcoming the chance that they might do the same thing to Spike. On top of wanting to kill every last one of them, I can't just sit back and risk that happening."

"I get where you're coming from Twitchy, really I do. But you're askin' me to give up what I've got right now, and frankly, I'm happy with my life," he said, reaching up to run his hoof through his mane. "I know I owe you, but...damn."

I shook my head slowly. "I'm not demanding anything from you. You wanted out, I got you out, end of story. I'm not going to drag you back in kicking and screaming."

"Damn right you did. Turned a shitty situation into my benefit, faked a burnt body and everything!"

"That entire raid was a set-up, I just couldn't prove it. Gave me a chance to give you a chance though, so I'd say it was a net gain all around," I muttered, smirking at him. "Hey, remember how you came up with that annoying nickname?"

"Yeah! I got assigned to some smartass little filly who thought her shit didn't stink, who'd been placed in charge of a drug deal with Neighponese Yakuza!" he said, his face splitting into a grin.

"Yup! But you knew there was something dangerous about me. You always had keen instincts."

"Yeah, and when those drug dealers wouldn't take you seriously because you were just a little filly, and kept trying to badger you into giving them more of a cut than they deserved, your eye started twitching...."

I grinned at him and gave him a nudge with my knee. "And you were the only one that had the good sense to take a step away from me."

He lowered himself down onto all fours again and pointed at me. "Hey, can you blame me? What was it you and I did after that? I do believe it was something along the lines of you going in there with nothing but a pistol and putting a bullet in their heads while they were boarding their ship to run off back to their fancy island!"

"Come on, you shot a few of them too. You and that old rifle of yours."

"'Cept for that sea dragon that got the drop on you."

"Until I grabbed his head in my magic and bashed it against a wall until he stopped moving," I said, licking my lips as the memory came to the surface, as if I'd done it just yesterday. "Then I tied a chain around his ankles, attached it to the ship's anchor, and tossed it overboard."

Shady visibly shuddered. "I heard him screaming all the way, that thing just dragged him off the deck of the ship like it was nothing."

"You didn't even know they needed to breathe air too! You thought they had gills!" I said, barking out a laugh.

"How was I supposed to know?! I was born in the Republic, they don't give a shit about Neighpon."

"Formal education, Shady. Knowledge is power," I teased, tapping the side of my head with my hoof. "Well, that and the creative use of extremely heavy metals, but mostly knowledge."

"Yeah, yeah, you always had a plan, always thinking, always outsmarting the competition," he droned. "Tell you the truth, thinking back on it, I don't think your boss intended for that drug deal to end well."

"I don't think he did either. That was only my third time being involved in a big deal like that, and it was my first time being in charge of one. As usual, they used me to optimal effect," I muttered. "Really pisses me off."

I pushed away from the wall and lowered down to all fours once more, turning to walk towards the entrance of the alleyway again. Shady followed me just the same, pensive and quiet as ever. I had a feeling I knew what had him so deep in thought, so I decided to take a stab in the dark, see if I hit my mark.

"Look Shady, I'm not going to demand anything from you. You wanna stay out of this, that's your choice, and I wouldn't blame you," I said, stopping at the alleyway's entrance, turning to look at him. "But if you choose to help me...head into Canterlot, and duck into my old safehouse. You remember where it is, right?"

He stared at me while we left the alley behind, that minotaur buddy of his waiting just around the corner. He had loyal friends that had his back...I appreciated that. I wasn't the only one that learned the value of having friends you could count on, despite the cards life dealt me. That was at least a little uplifting to think of.

"Yeah, I know where it is," he answered slowly, nodding up at his friend. "We're good, Buff."

The minotaur gave him a thumbs-up, though he still cast a suspicious glance my way. I simply nodded to him while he headed back into the bar.

"I gotta think about it, Twitchy."

"I wouldn't expect anything less," I responded, waving to him while stepping away. "If I don't see you in Canterlot, I'll assume you decided not to help, and I'll make some other plans."

He nodded to me and waved me off. "Uh-huh. Just be safe, you hear me?"

"Gonna be nigh-impossible, but I'll give it a shot!" I called back to him before heading off down the street, out of his sight.

I went back to my hotel room for a time, just resting while waiting for the time to tick by on the clock, idly flipping through the channels on the television provided with my room. When the time neared six in the evening, and the sun had almost set, I gathered my things and headed out for the train station.

Soon, I was on-board and watching the snowy scenery pass me by, idly hoping against hope that Shady would make the immensely stupid decision to help me out. When it came to ponies I knew I could depend on...he was the only one I had. For the time being, anyways.

Author's Note

Hey there everyone! This took longer than I expected it to, given the overall length of this chapter....

Here, have some nice lounge music!

Chapter 16 - Stalliongrad

written by Fire Soul

Ah, Stalliongrad. There were so many things you could say about the place. Most of them would be horribly negative things, but it's not that bad...if you don't mind your city looking like a partially abandoned, de-militarized zone that just happens to have a lot of civilians trying to make the most of it.

I do believe a quick history lesson is in order.

Stalliongrad was originally a part of Equestria, but a particularly rebellious group of nobles decided that they didn't much like Celestia's rule. This was around four-hundred, fifty-three years ago, I think? That sounds about right. They wanted to do their own thing, free of Celestia's rule!

Equestria was right in the middle of a renaissance into a new golden age, and the last thing Celestia wanted was a civil war, and believe me, they were willing to go through with it. They'd garnered quite a following in - you guessed it! - Stalliongrad. You can probably take a minor guess as to where this is going.

Celestia turned the rogue city over to them, and under the fresh zeal of a new and ambitious ruler, they immediately put their resources to work building a giant wall around the city to cut it off from the rest of Equestria. Trade and travel was heavily restricted almost to the point of non-existence, but even those nobles realized that they needed trade in order to sustain their population. Unfortunately, they couldn't put the needs of their people above their pride.

It was fine at first, but as with all things, their rule decayed in quality as generations went on. The people of Stalliongrad tried, they struggled to make up for the poor government that had been forcibly established, but to no avail. To spare you a lot of the specific details, the oligarchy that had been established since the beginning wound up devolving into a shit-show of infighting, assassination attempts and very little actual governing of their tiny, one-city 'country'.

They barely lasted two-hundred and sixty-five years before the insurgents became too numerous for them to contain.

It took Equestria by surprise, back then. Took a while for news to spread, but eventually everyone heard about the massive, world-shaking explosions that decimated the outer rim of Stalliongrad along with the giant wall they'd built to contain and 'protect' their city. Homes were destroyed, businesses were decimated, and a whole lot of loyalists died in the process, but none of the Stalliongradi cared. They were free.

I asked Celestia about it once, back when I was reading up on Equestrian history. I asked her why she would allow such a thing to happen, and her answer was simple. Sometimes...her ponies need to be allowed to make mistakes, to learn the hard lessons. They caved to their own ambitions and desires without caution, wisdom or any care for those around them, and if she'd tried to force the people of Stalliongrad to continue to follow her rule, there was no doubt that civil war would've followed. They would've been galvanized into action against her.

A hundred and eighty-eight years later, and the city still hasn't fully recovered, though not through lack of trying. The isolation it had been put through devastated the place, and crime ran rampant pretty much everywhere. It was a cesspit of small-time criminal activity, with some big companies extending their reach into it in hopes of staking an early claim for the day when Stalliongrad finally rose above the desolation it was still covered in.

Oh, it has a nice chunk of itself rebuilt! Fancy stores, tourist traps, you name it. If you've ever visited some exotic locations before, you might know what I'm talking about. You'll have large areas dedicated to making that city look like far more than it actually is, and that's fine for tourists. Walk a few blocks outside of that tourist zone though, and suddenly you see what's really going on under the surface.

And this was the place I was choosing to do my business. If I didn't know better, I'd call myself stupid.

There's one other unique feature to Stalliongrad, one that seemed to have developed over centuries...and it's one of those things that becomes apparent to you the moment you step off the train. Ponies here are freaking huge. Not like, thick-muscled bodybuilder kind of huge, but they're just big. On average, a Stalliongradi is as big as Luna when she's back to full strength, and some can be even bigger than that! Not...y'know, Celestia-sized, but you get the idea.

I stepped off the train with my suitcase in my magic and my luggage being wheeled behind myself, also held in my magic. At least the luggage had wheels built into it. I had actually phoned ahead to get a reservation at one of the hotels far less likely to be robbed. You know, one of the hotels located in the 'tourist trap' part of the city.

Thankfully, the room they provided me with came with a safe, complete with a lock I could set the code to. I doubled up on the security with it and worked a temporary magic lock around the safe just to be sure. Nothing against the staff of the hotel or anything, but I just don't trust a lock I can open with the proper tools. I need a little magic wrapped around that sucker to be sure.

I stowed the cash I'd brought along in the safe, and went to work unpacking my things. The usual stuff you'd expect, a few spare suits, some more casual clothes, underwear, that sort of stuff. I'd even brought along my black and red pinstripe suit, with matching trilby! What? That's not fashionable, that's tacky? That's very interesting, yes...how about fuck you?

My stay was going to be for approximately two weeks, give or take. I had a phone in my room, and I certainly could afford the charges the hotel would levy against me if I used it, but I could go without calling home just yet. Spike wasn't that attached to me, at least not anymore. Besides, I had Octavia checking in now and then, and the two of them got along well enough. Now if only Octavia could keep that mouth of hers in check....

At least this time I had no plans to just sit around in my room. Instead, I had work to do, and that started with establishing a legitimate alibi as to what I was doing here. It wasn't like when I was younger and I could go wherever I pleased. I wasn't a celebrity back then. Not like a big movie star or model (though I'm sure if it weren't for my bum leg, I could pull off a modeling career for a niche crowd), but more like...that pony that answers to the ruler of the land directly.

Now I'm a hero of Equestria, and unlike Shady, I'm quite sure ponies in Stalliongrad have heard about me. I needed a whole lot of preparation before I dared to do anything illegal myself.

Now, perhaps you think I'm being lazy, skipping over the more legitimate business deals I strike up around the city. Truth is, I just don't want to bore you. It should get the point across well enough when I say that I had several businesses in mind, and a few smaller ones I stumbled across while walking back and forth between the locations. It's all a lot of complicated stuff that I doubt you want me to go into detail about. Do you really want to hear about the paperwork I'm filling out, and the shipping companies I'm making contact with to help ensure certain smaller businesses get the products they wish to sell? The hours I'm spending and days I'm burning through talking with executives and getting everything in order?

It's not hard to make stuff like that happen when you've got a little star power behind you. No one wants to be known as 'that pony/business that rejected Celestia's student'.

I spent four days straight doing this, and yes, it was quite tiring. This wasn't exactly a vacation for me, and I never intended it to be. Believe me, my work didn't stop there, but on the fifth day...that was when I started donning a disguise to tend to my more undesirable business deeper inside of the less welcoming parts of Stalliongrad.

The disguise, as it often was, was unremarkable. A simple coat of baby blue coupled with a royal blue mane and tail. There was nothing I could do about my messed-up leg, but I could at least somewhat hide it from view under a pair of sweatpants and a comfy, if a bit baggy, white shirt. Of course, I needed to bring a coat as well, something heavy and thick to keep warm in this icy climate, so a nice, light brown full-body trenchcoat worked well enough. Nothing too fancy to give away the fact that I had a whoooole lotta cash on me.

I had spent my evenings the past few days gathering information in the less welcoming areas, always disguised the exact same way. It was a risk, as with all things, but there were always ponies willing to talk to a nice sweet-talking mare with a cute face. Some try to overstep their bounds, but they don't get far when they do...not even Stalliongradi that tend to tower over me.

Truth be told, there's no absolute certainty as to how they became so big. The closest anyone has ever come to determining where their size came from is someone tracing lineages back to when Equestria was just starting out. Stalliongrad was a city established by particularly hardy ponies that didn't entirely like the idea of falling in line under Celestia's rule. That was how those nobles so easily swayed them. They're a very self-sufficient people, or at least they were.

Anyway, back then Saddle Arabia was quite amicable with us, and as our borders began to open up to them, Saddle Arabians took a particular interest in the Frozen North. It was so different from the hot climates, massive deserts and expansive canyons their kingdoms occupied, they couldn't help but be intrigued by something so different. You can imagine where a lot of their tourism led them to.

Some Saddle Arabians took to the icy, cold surroundings. They settled down there. Most did not. Some were outright disillusioned to the beauty of it due to the freezing cold alone. Can't say I blame them for running back home, to their hot deserts. They didn't have thicker coats of fur like the Stalliongradi did, even back then.

That was about the time when the crossbreeding started, and if you know anything about genetics, you can probably guess why I'm skeptical about this being the origin of Stalliongradi ponies' huge statures. There had to be some other reason for it. Then again, for all I know, there could be a magic-based reason all Saddle Arabians are so big, but surely the Stalliongradi aren't the first time there's been crossbreeding between the Three Tribes and the Saddle Arabians....

Gah! Now I've got something else to look into. My thirst for knowledge, nothing ever truly quenches it! I personally lean towards the theory that it's due to magic causing them to change over generations to be better adapted to the colder climate. Doesn't explain the size, but it does explain the thicker fur. Maybe it's a mix of both? It's hard to say with magic, it's not exactly a science.

In any case, through some careful talking and flirting with ponies probably twice my size on average, I caught wind of the location of just the kind of underground business I was looking for. With any luck, it would provide me more than just a source of illegitimate income. I just had to locate it first.

I walked down street after street, the bustle of the touring crowds fading out behind me along with the police presence, which appeared to be spread paper-thin near the outskirts of the area that those in charge of Stalliongrad wanted you to see. Two blocks beyond that, and instantly, the real Stalliongrad was on display. Old, decrepit buildings of brick and concrete, neglected and abandoned littered the streets I walked down, in-between small businesses struggling to turn over a decent enough profit for their owners. In the distance, I heard gunfire, and by the time I rounded a corner and reached the location of it, I saw an old stallion laying on the sidewalk in front of his store, the display window broken open and his shop ransacked.

Everywhere I went, ponies were giving me odd looks, some of curiosity, others of animosity or outright intent to harm me. A small, soft-looking mare like myself wasn't welcome in this more rugged part of Stalliongrad, surrounded by those far less fortunate than even the low-class of most other cities in Equestria. Despite my skills, and my magic at my disposal, there was something to be said for feeling like a tiny midget surrounded by giants. Every base, prey part of my mind told me to run back to safety. I ignored it. There was often a certain way this sort of thing went down.

It was only a matter of time before one of them began to follow me. Some big unicorn mare with a thick dark brown coat of fur, and a dual-colored mane of black and a very dark shade of green. Did I mention that Stalliongradi tend to have darker fur, mane and tail colors? Whole lot less colorful than normal ponies, but it's commonly believed they have darker colors to help them retain heat better.

She tried to pull a gun on me. She didn't get much of a chance. The moment she rounded the corner behind me, my magic was there, immediately overpowering hers and taking the gun from her. It was one of the old revolver models, like the one I carried around as a just-in-case. Considering their size, it wasn't surprising to see a Stalliongradi using a revolver instead of a more normal-sized gun.

Her next attempt was to both body me, and throw her magic at me. The magic was easy enough to deal with, for obvious reasons. She attempted to grab me, and I overpowered her magic entirely, which made her falter when she tried to charge at me. The strategy was sound, which meant that this probably wasn't her first time doing it to some wandering outsider like myself. Unfortunately for her, her size didn't mean much to my magic.

Next thing she knew, she was head-first into the side of the busted-up building next to us, and I slammed the side of her head into it a couple more times for good measure. She became a whole lot more amicable after she realized that my magic could trump anything she threw at me. Thanks to our rather noisy altercation, I'd gotten the chance to prove I wasn't a mare to be trifled with, and a whole lot of nosy ponies that thought I didn't notice them chose to keep their snouts out of my business now.

I held on to her gun while she gathered her wits. I had no intention of doing anything long-term to hurt her. To some extent I couldn't even blame her for trying. Her fur looked a bit mucky, and her mane seemed particularly disheveled. Who knew if she'd eaten yesterday, or today for that matter? I wasn't taking pity on her for anything, just...look, some ponies had a tough, shit life dealt to them. I didn't need to make it worse by metaphorically kicking dirt in their eyes.

I took the opportunity to question her about the location I was looking for, but she didn't know much of anything. She'd seen a few well-dressed ponies heading to the west of where we were, but that was about it. Quite fortuitous for me, since that was the direction I'd been heading in this entire time, but it still didn't narrow things down for me. I already knew this place was located to the west of where most tourists enter Stalliongrad at.

Still, I emptied the bullets from her revolver with a simple motion of magic, then sent them sailing through the air across the street, through the busted-out window of another abandoned building. I tossed her revolver back to her and kept my magic at the ready while she left, thoroughly put in her place. I watched her walk down the street and turn the corner before continuing on my way, feeling a bit more respected by those I passed by.

That was, until I found myself walking deeper and deeper into the abandoned parts of Stalliongrad. The places closer to the old borders of the city, just short of the walls that had come tumbling down on top of countless buildings when they'd been blown up, where only the most unfortunate of souls dared to try to live at. Sadly, Stalliongrad was full of a lot of those.

I walked past several piles of rubble, and multiple old metal barrels that had been filled with refuse and debris. Fires billowed from them, marking the way as the sun began to descend over the horizon, the crunch of snow beneath my hooves becoming far more pronounced as I began to venture to an area that very few ever had a reason to tread.

You might be wondering why I don't have my suitcase full of cash with me. Well, the reason is simple: I wanted to find this place first before I made any attempts to buy it. Plus, I needed to be absolutely sure of this place's location before I started carrying around oodles of cash into an area full of homeless or poor ponies more than willing to go trigger-happy in order to take it from me.

The burning barrels acted as vague sources of light at best, as the sun faded and the day faded into night. I was cold, the wind was picking up, and the lack of sunlight wasn't doing me any favors in regards to keeping warm. I had to stop at a few of those barrels to warm myself up a little, a few of the homeless around me every time. They were intrigued, but they said nothing to me. I had kept a small pouch of bits on me in case I needed it, and as things got darker, I decided to kill two birds with one stone.

I began to randomly offer homeless ponies I came across a few bits for information. I tended to aim for those that were isolated enough that others might not notice them getting enough bits to get a meal for the night. It wasn't like I wanted a lot of them knowing I had money either. Most of them couldn't tell me what I wanted to know, but I gave them the bits anyways. They needed it more than I did, and it's the small kindnesses that matter most to ponies in their situation.

Eventually, one of them told me what I wanted to know. He pointed me to the northwest and told me to keep an eye out for some guys standing outside a broken-down building, dressed in black suits, one an earth pony and the other a unicorn. I gave him another five bits for the info. I didn't care if it was correct or not. I had a general direction that helped me hone in on my destination better.

The only hitch in this plan was my lack of information, and a distinct lack of an escort, but the day I technically pimp myself out in order to get into a fucking underground fighting ring was the day I lost any and all respect for myself. I have no problem being an escort on occasion, but ponies that tend to frequent the kind of place I wanted to get into weren't likely to be paying for just some friendly companionship for the evening. That's the sort of encounter that they expect to end with my undies around my ankles and my front pinned to the wall.

Mm, just had a very pleasant memory come back to me...that's a story for another time though.

It took me a while to find what I'd been told about. Sure enough, that bum had been correct, and soon I found a spot that had a dim light illuminating the area outside of an old building that was partially caved in. Seemed like a strange place to set up shop, but I suppose it was remote and unsuspecting enough. They could just snuff the lights and duck inside if any serious problems arose. If it was really organized, it probably had some diamond dog workers ready to dig tunnels far away for ponies to escape through in an emergency.

I stayed out of sight, off in the darkness for the time being, just observing them. There were already carriages around the back of the building, hidden in the shadows, with a few ponies hanging out, conversing and keeping an eye on them. They were probably the ones in charge of pulling them. All of them Stalliongradi, which was fortunate for them. It was fucking cold out, and it was really starting to get to me. I wasn't shivering yet, but it'd been a couple hours out here, and my hooves were feeling just a bit numb.

Despite what I've said about Stalliongrad thus far, they did have their own unique brand of nobility. They just happened to be business tycoons, the type that most would call absolute slimeballs. Personally I had no issue with them. I've seen far worse, and them uniting a bunch of businesses to create a perfect face for Stalliongrad to fool the world with at the expense of the rest of the city? Yeah, that's filthy of them to do, but at least they aren't fucking toxic and spread across the entire country like the Mafia are.

In any case, I needed to be very careful with these guards. If method numero uno didn't work out, I'd probably have to go work my magic on one of those rich bastards tomorrow night. I'd also have to come up with a new disguise if I got caught. I ducked low and crept closer, staying in the shadows just out of their peripheral vision while lighting up my horn.

I weaved into their heads slowly but surely. Giving them any hint that magic was being used on them directly would probably instantly give me away, and if the worst-case scenario were to occur, they'd probably close the entire place down and abandon it. There was plenty of space, underground or above ground, for them to set up shop in.

Their jobs were simple, as I sat there, examining their memories for repetition. I needed to know the rules they'd been given, and even the smartest pony tends to repeat their tasks to themselves when they work. Well, unless they don't care about their job, then they probably couldn't give two shits, but considering these guys were in charge of watching the entrance to their employer's big, massively illegal operation, I don't think they could afford to not give a shit.

They had to keep a checklist of who was allowed in and who was turned away or, if they were particularly suspicious, taken inside for 'questioning'. The only caveat...was for fighters. Someone wanted to fight? Let 'em in, let 'em get examined, then have someone escort them into the back rooms where the fighters prepared themselves to throw down in the cage, the first time anyways. That was my way in.

Only catch was, I couldn't allow for an examination...so it was time to plant some fake recognition in their heads.

This was the part I tended to enjoy the most about doing things like this. Really lets you flex that creative muscle in your brain, you know? I've already proven I tend to get creative when I'm in the middle of a fight, you can only imagine some of the stuff I can come up with when I'm given reason to pick up a metaphorical pen and draw up a ton of fake memories!

Yes, I'm aware of what a pen is. We have them. Quills are just one of those things that Equestria hasn't let go of quite yet.

Unfortunately, this particular scenario didn't allow for anything flashy. I didn't want to stand out, so I had to make myself as unassuming as possible. I was a small mare, from out of town, named...hm, Dark Delight. An obviously fake name, as fake as the memories themselves, but making the guards believe it was fake was all part of the plan. No sane fighter would ever give their real name anyways.

As far as they knew, I performed poorly. Left the arena beaten to a pulp more often than not, and I only won two matches out of eleven. Piss-poor performance, really. Nothing special, nothing that stands out, and usually I only show up to watch fights, though occasionally I'll get fired up enough to take a shot at it once again. I had good income, not that I ever talked about my job with anyone, so they were fine with letting me in as long as I made sure to place a few good bets.

The earth pony had a bit of a soft spot for the underdogs that got their asses kicked nine times out of ten, too. I could use that to my advantage, if it became necessary. I continued weaving the memories together in my own head, carefully maintaining my connection with them the entire time, thoughts and falsifications twisting this way and that as my magic weaved through it and bound it all together into a cohesive format that their minds could accept.

The best part about this spell? I don't have to craft every single moment of every single memory I want them to have, though that's the far more safe way to do it. No one would ever be able to tell the difference between real and fake memories if I did that. That sort of thing would take hours, potentially days. No, this was more like...inserting an idea, and letting their brains run away with it. They would conjure the memories rapid-fire themselves in their subconscious, and I'd be watching the entire time to make sure I knew exactly what they 'remembered' of me.

A single pulse of magic from my horn was all it took. The unicorn flinched when I did it, but other than rubbing his head a little, he didn't seem to notice at all. I stayed where I was, carefully watching their brains go to work, like one's imagination running wild with possibilities, memories forming from nothing in mere seconds. It was like planting a seed and watching a tree with numerous lush, leafy branches sprout up in front of you in an instant.

When the memories finished forming, I double-checked everything they'd come up with before letting my connection to their minds go. It was time to play the part of the cocky brawler that just didn't know when to quit!

I approached calmly, stepping out of the darkness and into the dim light they had set up in front of the building. They both visibly tensed as I became more visible, but I could clearly see the moment they recognized me. They both relaxed, but the earth pony looked unsure, even worried. He was probably concerned about my reason for being there.

"Hey boys!" I called out to them, giving them an energetic wave of my hoof.

They both looked at each other, but the unicorn just shrugged and went back to looking around for anyone else approaching. Spark Point, I believe he was called. The earth pony kept his eyes on me, looking me up and down as I walked up to both of them.

"Hey, Delight," he said, smirking just a bit. "Come to get your flank served up on a silver platter again?"

"Why you asking, Rough? Is it a dish you'd just love to chow down on?" I teased, sticking my tongue out at him.

He had the decency to blush just a little, but for the most part he just rolled his eyes and shook his head at me.

"No way, Dark. You know I got a mare back home."

"Aww, how unfortunate," I teased. "I'm a sucker for a stallion that's loyal."

"Sounds like a problem," Point chimed in, not even looking in our direction. "Since you can't have him because of said loyalty."

I hmph'ed and flicked my tail dismissively. "I happen to enjoy ogling quality merchandise when I go shopping! Doesn't mean I'm gonna buy it."

If I'm being entirely honest, I'd totally take him for a ride. That big intimidating stature, that Stalliongradi accent...can you tell I like them exotic, sometimes? Shame I had work to do, and a shame he was such a kind stallion. Kinda wish I'd found the time to buy him a drink sometime, he deserved it. He was really in the wrong line of work.

"So hey, uh...you're just going in to bet, right?" Rough asked me without missing a beat.

I idly flicked a bit of my mane to the side, smiling up at him. "You're real sweet to always be concerned. I can practically hear it seeping out every time you ask me that," I said, shrugging. "Dunno, didn't plan to fight, but if someone in there gets me going, I can't make any promises."

He didn't seem happy about that, but that was the best he was going to get out of me. Without a word, I walked past them and let myself in. Neither of them stopped me. It'd prove useful for the next few weeks, and after that, Dark Delight would disappear entirely...well, unless I owned the place by then. If that wound up being the case, Dark Delight would have to be one of those disguises I wrote down in detail somewhere to make sure I never forgot about it.

I stepped through the door, and found myself standing in an empty room, save for a single trapdoor that...well, it actually wasn't that obvious at first glance, but when you work for the Mafia as long as I have, you tend to get an eye for it. It looked heavy though, and I could hear some guys watching a movie in a back room. My best guess was that fighters were expected to be able to lift a trap door made of solid concrete.

I picked up the heavy, rusty steel ring in my magic and hefted it up with ease, the concrete noisily grinding against the inside of the floor until it flipped up, revealing a staircase that led down at a particularly steep angle. I'd have to watch my step, I guess. With only a vague feeling of apprehension, I descended down into the trap door and pulled the cover back into place, small lightbulbs strung up along the walls illuminating the way down.

There was a low thrum of activity further down, and it only got louder and louder as time went by. Seriously, the descent was ridiculous! I still can't believe any pompous bastard of the world would ever walk this far, and then walk all the way back up those stairs. Wait...fuck. I was going to have to walk back up those stairs! My right hindleg was aching at the thought of it already. Or maybe that was just the hours of walking to find the place...eh, either-or.

I could hear an announcer shouting over a series of speakers as I ventured to the bottom of the stairs. A semi-narrow tunnel led the way forward, and soon the noise was almost deafening as crowds cheered and the familiar sound of rattling chainlink fence reached my ears. In a situation like this, I would've used my mind magic to sharpen my senses so I could get a better feel for what awaited me ahead, but I'd managed to get in here without anyone being the wiser, so I wasn't particularly concerned about something like that.

It was only when I stepped out into the main area of this little venture that I really got an idea of what I was dealing with here. A diamond dog waitress wandered past me, her posture surprisingly formal and straight compared to the usual slouched-down posture most diamond dogs had. I suppose that was a necessity if you were going to carry trays of drinks around. Considering the overall design of the place, with wooden reinforcements bracing the stone and dirt walls, the chainlink fence surrounding an arena made of concrete, zero padding...the patrons of the place and the staff were behaving with surprising class.

Well, as much class as can be expected with the patrons shouting and cheering on their chosen fighters. It wasn't just rich ponies in here. There were a lot of Stalliongradi down here that were clearly just ponies that knew ponies that knew ponies. They were crowded around the cheaply-designed cage in the center of the huge underground room, egging on a pair of pegasi that were going at it like they were trying to murder each other. Wouldn't have surprised me if they were.

The sudden cry of pain from the ring was met with uproaring applause while I tried to find an empty table to sit down at. There were a few tables with some nice cushioned seats close to the ring, on an elevated section so their view wasn't obscured by the crowds that were there just to see some good old-fashioned bloodsport. The ring itself was very tall, almost up to the ceiling of the room itself, with a magic-resistant ceiling covering the top of it. Can't have any unicorns slipping a weapon into the ring from up top, right?

I eventually found a decent spot a bit further back, away from most of the richer-blooded types that surrounded me. Either way, I kinda stood out. The vast majority in the room were Stalliongradi, and I was tiny by comparison. I just played it cool and ordered a drink when one of the waitresses walked by. There were just a few ponies more my size around the room, but they were few and far between.

That was where I stayed for quite some time, that night. Hours ticked by while I watched fighter after fighter throw down in the ring. The vast majority of them were earth ponies and pegasi, but once in a while, I got to see two unicorns fight it out. They were never paired up with earth ponies because, well...do I really need to explain why? A contained space where a unicorn can't effectively run or put something between them and their target? You're just asking for the unicorn to get his or her ass kicked and their horn snapped off like a twig. S'not even remotely fair.

Then again, life's far from fair even to the most spoiled of brats, but still. It'll always find a way to fuck you over if you give it the opportunity, and trust me, everyone gives life a lot of opportunities to be a total douchenozzle to the eye.

The fighters didn't have anything special going on, as the night went on. Must've seen over twenty or thirty of them before something caught my eye. Even the noisy announcer was getting hyped up about it. Something about some really skilled mare taking the ring, a unicorn of all things. On top of that, they were pitting her against an earth pony!

"Welp. She's either dead or hospitalized by the time this is over." I muttered to myself, sipping on the drink I'd been brought.

Near a doorway previously hidden away in the shadows, I heard the crowd crowd cheering uproariously as a large Stalliongradi mare stepped out into the light of the room. My eyes widened at the sight of...okay, do you know how rare it is to see a unicorn that's as stacked as an earth pony that works out every day? It's really uncommon! I train every week several times a week with the Royal Guard in Canterlot, and I jog and exercise to keep myself fit and ready for action, but I sure as Tartarus don't look like that!

I don't mean to make it sound like she was gigantic or anything. She wasn't any bigger than the average Stalliongradi. It was the muscle definition that immediately caught my eye. Even among the Royal Guard, you rarely saw such a pure example of dedication to sculpting one's body. She clearly knew what she was doing too, because she didn't have that whole 'zero body fat, hundred percent muscle' look about her. No, it was...carefully balanced. It was the kind of body that adhered to strict dieting and exercise regimens, with no room for slacking off.

If she'd been born an earth pony, I think even with my magic I'd have been thoroughly intimidated by her. The scars didn't help. I couldn't make them out immediately, but as she stepped closer to the cage, I noticed that her body, from head to fetlock, was covered in random, strangely-shaped scars. Some of them were easily identified as injuries sustained in the arena, but others looked a bit more suspect. Bullet wounds, knife wounds...possibly even some scars left from magical burns. Whatever she'd gotten up to in her life, she'd been put through some shit.

Even her face hadn't been spared some of those marks. Sure, they were usually difficult to spot under fur, but with how Stalliongradi fur tended to be a bit thicker, it really stuck out. That being said though, she really cleaned up well. Despite clearly having warmed up in the back, her coat looked brushed and finely groomed, and I found myself wondering what kind of fur wash she used to get that dirty yellow fur looking so shiny. Almost golden, if you looked at it in a certain way. Really matched up with her pitch-black mane and tail, both of which looked equally as shiny...but, her mane seemed remarkably spiky. I also wondered at the time if that was just natural, or if she actually went through the trouble of spiking up her mane like that.

Oh, and she was a hermaphrodite like me. What? I was looking her over real carefully from a distance, you think I wouldn't notice a big pair of balls and a sheath between her hindlegs? It wasn't like she was even trying to hide it, and judging by how some mares were squealing and calling out to her, she wasn't afraid of letting the ladies have a piece. I couldn't even blame them. They had good taste.

It was actually a bit surreal for me. Strange as it may sound, that was the very first time I'd ever seen another hermaphrodite. I wasn't there to find good tail however, so it was more of a curious observation for me than anything else. Given how hyped up everyone was, I found myself even more interested in how well she fought. Sometimes you find those hidden gems, and I couldn't wait to see if I was eyeing a buried lump of diamond dog shit, or an actual diamond.

"Alright everypony, give it up for the Beast of Stalliongrad, Gadget Steelmare!"

Someone pulled the gate into the cage open, and she walked in like she owned the place. It was like she was channeling Rainbow Dash, with how she was grinning and flexing her muscles, striking poses for the crowd and getting some of the noisiest applause I'd ever heard. With a moniker like 'Beast of Stalliongrad', I guessed that she'd earned all of that approval.

It was only a few minutes after that that her opponent arrived. A ruddy-green earth pony with a blonde mane. Really garish coloration for a Stalliongradi, but I tried not to judge him. He didn't look half-bad either, all things considered. Certainly a lot less scars, but personally, I liked the scars Gadget was rocking. Every single one was a story waiting to be told, if she remembered at all. If experience has taught me anything, it's that ponies with her attitude love talking about their old battle wounds.

He didn't get much of an introduction. Shit, I don't even remember his name. All I remember was that he was Gadget's opponent, and he wasn't actually half-bad. He was simply outclassed.

They stood there in the ring, and the stallion seemed a bit nervous, but plenty fired up. Being an earth pony, he had the clear physical advantage. Gadget however, she...well, she was entirely confident. Not scared at all. Excited? Oh, definitely. I could see it in the way she lowered her stance and stomped one of her forelegs impatiently against the floor, her tail swishing back and forth in quick, jerking twitches. She wanted to tear into him, and I couldn't help but lean forward a little in my seat.

The moment the bell went off, I expected magic from Gadget. I was waiting to see that horn light up and decimate that earth pony by slamming him around like a ragdoll until he screamed for his Mother to come save him. You can imagine my surprise when they both charged at each other like stampeding bulls.

I thought she had a death wish until she swerved to her right at the very last moment. She barely got out of the way as he threw himself forward in an attempt to tackle her and push her back, but she was remarkably quick for her size. She jerked her entire body towards him and tackled him from the side, the stallion loudly grunting as she held him down and slammed a hoof into his ribs a few times.

Her attacks were unrefined, but they had a certain intelligence behind them. She knew exactly what to aim for. Instead of hitting him with the flat of her hoof, she made sure to attack just one of his ribs, and judging by how her hoof was angled, she was hitting him with the edge of her hoof to really dig in. I watched him cringe and curl in on himself in a reflexive attempt to get away from her with every hit.

Just when she was getting started though, she darted away from him and kept her eyes on his every move. A vast majority of the crowd seemed disappointed, but I was impressed. She definitely knew exactly what she was doing! It was standard tactics when a unicorn was forced into hoof-to-hoof combat with an earth pony. Weaken the body, but don't linger. It only takes one decent shot from an earth pony to break a unicorn. To say that she was playing a dangerous game taking him on without her magic was an understatement.

As it stood, she was taking chances to just wear him down. He knew how to fight pretty good as well, but she clearly had vastly more experience than him. He lunged at her again, but this time she ducked low to the ground, almost laying down, and got underneath him. She stood up and got her forehooves under his midsection, raising up onto her hindlegs and lifting him high into the air. The look on his face was priceless.

She let out a guttural cry while the audience watched on, screaming for blood. I could only watch in awe as she shifted him in her grasp and slammed him full-force into the concrete. Like a vast majority of the crowd, I cringed at the brutal impact of his body and skull against the floor, the sensation of sympathy pain making me rub the back of my head and back.

It wasn't something you could hear with how loud things were, but with the way his chest was heaving, he was struggling to get air. She didn't let up on him either. She was on him immediately, and he tried to take a swing, but it was slow and clumsy, and all she had to do was duck her head closer to him in order to make him completely miss. She'd gotten him good, and she was taking the chance to work that rib some more, throwing her weight into it. His face contorted with agony every time she hit him, and it was entirely possible that that rib was already broken.

What was happening to him didn't interest me at that moment as much as the look on her face did. She was smiling. No, more than that, she was grinning! There was a wildness in her eyes, that kind of joy you only see in someone that really loves what they're doing. I couldn't look away as she laid into him more and more, the stallion eventually going limp after she stomped on his head a few times. His hooves were twitching and his body was convulsing a little while blood poured from his nose and his mouth, but I was at least somewhat certain he'd survive. Then again, she'd really given him a full-body trampling once he'd finally given up.

She rose up on her hindlegs again and roared up towards the ceiling, working the crowd into a frenzy more than they already were, after witnessing an almost-murder right in front of them. I got up from my seat and walked towards the door Gadget and that other fighter had entered from, wanting to get a closer look at her. She had piqued my interest. It's not exactly something you often get to witness, a unicorn taking down an earth pony in physical combat.

If there were any doubts about me returning to get my hooves on this place, they were thrown out the window after what I'd just witnessed. I needed money, but more than anything, I wanted to see Gadget fight again. I wanted to see more than the small showing she'd put on that night. A plan was already formulating in my head if she proved to be just the kind of pony I was looking for...but I needed to be absolutely sure she was worth my time.

Author's Note

This took longer than I wanted it to. I may or may not have had my soul consumed by XCOM: Enemy Within, a game I was lured into playing all over again after XCOM 2 came out. A game that I can't play because my laptop would boil itself to death if I dared to even try. It already has an overheating issue if I play Enemy Within, let alone that super-hype sequel.

What? I'm crying? No I'm not. You're all liars.

.... *sniffle*

In any case, leave me some comments! I enjoy feedback.

Chapter 17 - Thy Name, Temptation

written by Fire Soul

It was amusing to watch her exit the cage while a few...uh, I hesitate to call them medics, but at the very least they were ponies that could stabilize that stallion. It probably wasn't too obvious on the outside, but after getting slammed like that, it would amaze me if he could even walk, and the trampling Gadget gave him after that probably broke a few things and caused some internal bleeding.

I waded into the crowd that formed while a few ponies in suits forced them to give Gadget some room. I kept my distance, but I made sure to have a good enough view that I could get an idea for what was going on. For the most part, I was looking for an opportunity to get closer to her so I could converse with her. That wasn't likely to happen out here, especially not with her grandstanding and flexing for her adoring fans. I could even hear her groupies crying out her name and trying to get her attention.

As the crowd dispersed, I idly stood among them near the cage while some other fighters came out to throw down. You know, after they carried that stomped-out stallion out of the ring and cleaned up the blood. I was surprised they even bothered to clean, that's normally not much of a concern in places like this.

It wasn't more than ten minutes later that I caught sight of a couple of mares heading over to talk to one of those suited stallions at the shadowy doorway. I wandered over towards the duo and kept my distance just enough to not seem out of place, my eyes staying locked on the arena while I kept an ear swiveled in their direction. It was hard to hear them over the cheers of the crowd and the grunts of pain and exertion from the fighters in the ring.

"...Just wanna...biggest fans."

I furrowed my brow in frustration as the crowd drowned them out again. I glanced over out of the corner of my eye and watched one of the guards step through the door for a minute, only to come back out and motion the two mares inside, both of them Stalliongradi earth ponies. They didn't matter, however. My only concern was how they convinced the guards to let them into the back. I didn't really catch much of anything that they were saying, aside from them mentioning they were fans of hers. Time to risk it, I figured.

I took a moment to get myself into the mindset of one of Gadget's fans. Had to fit the role of Dark Delight. A little bubbly, maybe a bit saucy...but with a certain self-confidence that you don't generally see in your average airhead. Usually those types replace self-confidence with being utterly aloof. Okay...I could do this.

I tend to rely on my mind magic in situations like this. Little non-intrusive suggestions, maybe some recognition, just a little nudge of a sort so that they think I'm supposed to be here. However, who knew how long Gadget would be back there? She might just leave after she was done with her fans, and at that point, I'd either be suspicious as snow in Tartarus if I approached her, or I'd seem like some kind of stalker fan, and neither were good labels to have placed upon yourself.

Of course, all of my worrying and caution seemed to be for nothing. All I did was say that I was a big fan of Gadget's, and they let me through with little more than a snide comment about me being a slut. Sure, alright, whatever. I couldn't care less what they thought of me. It did strike me as odd though...and with the way my mind works, you can imagine it only took me a few seconds to put two and two together. Hermaphrodite, probably didn't have access to suppressants, mares cheering her on, being let into the back area...there was only maybe a six percent chance this wasn't exactly what I expected it to be.

I mean, I suppose the chances weren't that bad, but I remember what I was like when I went off my suppressants. Maybe never going on them to begin with helped her be more acclimated to her own rampant sex drive? It wasn't like she had to put on a front like I did.

I got my answer the moment one of the ponies in the back pointed me in the right direction. One of the diamond dogs in the back pointed out a door at the end of the hall, and I only gave a brief knock before someone told me to come on in. The moment I stepped inside, I was met with the sight of two Stalliongradi mares giving Gadget all the attention they possibly could.

Gadget herself was partially reclined on her back on the floor, one of the mares being the only thing between Gadget's upper body and the ground as she laid on her side underneath the well-built unicorn. She was letting Gadget use her as a pillow, and judging by how Gadget was just kicking back with her eyes closed, enjoying what the second one was doing between her hindlegs, this probably wasn't the first time these two had paid her a visit.

I don't think I need to explain what the second one was doing...just use your imagination and acknowledge that there was a distinct slurping sound coming from down there.

"So, who is that?" Gadget asked casually, lifting her head to look at me over the back of the mare nestled between her hindlegs.

Oh hey, another accent. A heavy one at that, and rare to boot. Stalliongradi had left their own language of Gradios behind a long time ago, but there were still a few people that practiced it. Usually that language was something more educated ponies knew...I wondered where she'd learned it from?

Her eyes widened in surprise at the sight of me. "Oh-ho-ho, the boss knows what I like~!"

"Don't think your boss sent her," the mare laying under Gadget muttered. "I don't recognize her."

"Da, but I still like them small and cute," Gadget said, sitting up and patting the second mare's head, prompting her to slide her muzzle up and off of the shockingly large shaft between her legs. "Come join us, cutie. Da? I promise you will have a good time."

I immediately shook my head. "Uh, no. Sorry, I can wait until you three are done."

Gadget stared at me for a moment, looking almost pensive with how her brow furrowed. I actually felt a little self-conscious from the way she was looking at me. She slowly motioned for the two mares to move aside while she stood up, her cock bobbing underneath her as she walked towards me.

I lowered my stance as she approached, every alarm bell in my head going off as she stepped way too close for my comfort. Plus, she was hard. That was distracting, and just a bit alarming given the situation. I didn't know her mentality, for all I knew she intended to try to force herself upon me! It was almost reflexive when I took a step back, her imposing figure walking up to me until all I could do was look up at her, her head lowered just a little so we were closer to eye-level, muzzles inches apart.

Then she kissed me.

It was a sudden thing, and entirely unexpected. Her body language was relaxed and casual, but the way she moved her head so quickly, I didn't see it coming. For the briefest of moments I felt disarmed, like some part of me was melting, but I quickly snapped out of it when I felt one of her forelegs curling around the back of my neck.

I shot up onto my hindlegs and reached up to grab and twist her leg, pulling it straight and getting a grunt of pain out of her. I shoved her back just a little, breaking the kiss, and took a hard swing with my right hoof, impacting her squarely in the jaw. Her head snapped to her right and she stumbled back a few steps, but she only seemed to feel it for a few seconds. She rubbed her cheek and I quickly turned my body sideways to her, my forward foreleg lowered to guard my body while the other raised up and crossed over to protect my head.

I stood there, ready for her to do just about anything, my horn lit up with magic at the ready. I've been in a lot of situations, but I've never gotten a surprise kiss from anyone before. Her laughter broke the tension like a hot knife through butter, her hoof idly rubbing at her jaw while she looked me up and down once more.

"Good form! You are a boxer, but not professionally," she said, chuckling still as she stepped back and relaxed. "You are still too pretty for that kind of work. Probably from some other city. Nice clean clothes, soft fur...soft lips."

I couldn't help my blush as she lowered her head, the smoldering gaze she gave me drifting lower, looking down over my belly and my legs. I could almost feel the heat of her eyes as she took in my body, the utter lack of shame on her part making me fidget a little. I quickly dropped down to all fours again, and she barked out a laugh at how shy I was being. You could say that that pissed me off. Just a little bit. Twilight Sparkle is not shy!

She hah'ed and turned to go lounge with the two mares again, grinning. "I am just fucking with you! It is fine. So what did you want, if you did not come in here to get mounted?"

"I came here to talk to you," I huffed, looking away from her as she so blatantly spread her hindlegs to expose herself to me. "Must you do that?"

"Hey, you came in here, and interrupted me getting my dick sucked," she said, the vague frustration in her tone not lost on me. "Then you say you do not want it, when you do! Сука...."

"What the fuck are you-you know what? Nevermind," I muttered, shaking my head. "I just want to talk. Can we do that?"

She stared at me for a moment, then grunted and sat up again, rolling her eyes. "Fine. Ladies, could you give us a few minutes?" she asked, looking to the two of them. "Just a few minutes."

"A few minutes is all I need." I chimed in quickly, stepping away from the door.

The two mares looked back and forth between the two of us for a moment, but Gadget's insistence saw them step outside, the lingering scent of aroused mare reaching my nose as they walked past me. I had no doubt that they were aggravated, but they weren't my concern. Besides, this wouldn't take long.

I waited until the door was closed before I walked over to sit down closer to Gadget, my eyes taking in the layout of the room for a moment. A desk against the far wall, complete with a mirror, a punching bag in the corner along with some weights, elastic straps, a treadmill...even a small bed. Did she live here? There were stacks of magazines at the end of the bed on the floor, not pornography, but the variety seemed extensive. A door to my left likely led to a bathroom. All the basic necessities, minus a kitchen.

"So? Make it quick," she said, grabbing my attention once more. "I have some mares to enjoy, and I do not intend to be blue-balled by some fancy out-of-town noble."

I quirked a brow at that. "What makes you think I'm a noble?"

She snorted at me and shrugged. "The way you walk and talk. Too prissy and formal to be Stalliongradi."

"...You picked up on that just from me walking a few steps?" I asked. "There was no way you were watching me outside, you were busy and you had no reason to keep an eye on me."

"Da. It is like..." she said, sitting up taller, her back straightening out while she angled her head upward. "You have this way of moving, like you are proud of yourself simply for existing. Nobleponies are always like that."

"Fair enough," I muttered, making a mental note to fix that in the near future. "You're smart, if you can pick up on things like that. Very observant."

"Hah! First time anyone has ever said that about me!" she said, her posture going slack, back to the usual kind of slumping you see from a pony just going about their day, not trying to uphold some pointless sense of superiority. "I did not go to school. No time for it."

"There are many different forms of intellectual strength," I said calmly, brushing off her brief moment of self-deprecation. "Perhaps your education isn't formal, but you have experiences that no school could ever truly give you. Many things in life are like that. Must be why you could read me so well."

She stared at me for a moment, as if evaluating me in that single moment. I felt like she was taking a second appraisal of me, and some part of me felt good about that. I don't know what she thought of me previously, but what I'd said seemed to make her reconsider her opinion of me.

"Well...uh, thanks," she muttered, lifting a foreleg and making a rolling motion with her hoof. "So what was it you wanted to talk about?"

"Ah, right," I muttered, shrugging a little. "I wanted to meet with you the day after tomorrow, at my hotel room."

"Oh? I usually charge for that sort of thing-"

"Not for that, you damn lecher!" I half-shouted, furrowing my brow at her.

"Da, sure, that is what they all say! But in the end," she said, standing up and raising a foreleg, posing herself with a slight arch to her back and her muscles oh-so-slightly tensed, as if someone were about to take a picture of her. "They cannot resist. I do not know why you would not just join us for an hour, if that is what you are interested in...."

I ugh'ed and turned to leave. "Look, just...do you have something to write on?"

"Here." she said, relaxing her posture once more and smirking.

Her horn lit up, and she reached out for a piece of paper on her table, tearing a piece of it off and floating it over to me. I pulled a pen from one of my pockets and used my hoof as a semi-flat surface, carefully writing out the location and room number, floating it over to her again, capping my pen off and tucking it away.

"Day after tomorrow, right?" she asked, looking down at the piece of paper before folding it in half and tucking it away in a drawer on her table. "What time?"

"Noon."

"Sure that works," she said, motioning to the door. "Now then, I believe I have some fine, respectable ladies I need to tend to? Send them in on your way out."

"Uh-huh."

I left without saying anything else to her. She could think what she wanted about my intentions, as long as she showed up. I sent the two mares back in and calmly left the arena behind, making the long trek up those damned stairs and through the cold of Stalliongrad all the way back to my hotel. The biting late-night winds didn't compare to the ache in my hindleg, and the moment I had discreetly ducked into my room, I removed my clothes and undid the alterations I'd made to the color of my fur, mane and tail.

A nice, hot bath was exactly what I needed, and the moment I was neck-deep in that liquid heat, I began to reach down and massage my aching leg. I felt tired, just a bit exhausted from walking around so much and from being up fairly late after such a long day, and if I was being completely honest with myself, Gadget was very tempting. My suppressants can only do so much, and I'm still just as red-blooded as any other pony.

Physically, she was an astounding example of what a unicorn could be. So strong and built, but with just that small hint of femininity to her that made her all the more appealing to the eyes...mmm. It wasn't just her appearance either. Despite her very lascivious behavior, it wasn't arrogance that made her that way, I could tell. I'd met many ponies like her before. Ponies with their heads so far up their asses that they think simply acting confident is good enough. For some, maybe it is, but Gadget was...different.

It was a self-confidence borne from experience and complete faith in what one is capable of. That wasn't something you saw very often. There's a distinct difference between believing that you are what you think you are, and knowing you are what you think you are. She knows exactly who she is and what she wants to be, and she's completely unashamed of it. Anypony with half a brain would be jealous of her for that...and drawn to it.

I didn't notice I was stroking myself while thinking about her until I opened my eyes back up again. My leg had been forgotten, and my arousal was jutting up plain as day in front of me. I stared down at myself for a moment, considering just leaving it be, but...ugh, fuck it, why not? I could do to let off some steam.

The head of my shaft barely stuck up past the surface of the water, and I casually reached down to rub over the base of it with my hoof, my grip curling around the base of it and gently massaging over it while I laid my head back against the edge of the tub. I let my imagination run wild while I smoothly began to stroke up and down along my shaft, teasing over my medial ring while the image of that tempting mare filled my thoughts.

I closed my eyes and pictured that large figure nestling in between my hindlegs, tongue dragging over my cock. I felt her hoof stroking over the base of my shaft while she kissed at the head of it, grinding her tongue over the semi-flat end, and I felt my dick throb within my grip. I squeezed a little tighter around the base of it and let out a shaky breath, the water sloshing as my bad hindleg twitched a little.

She rose up a little and slid her muzzle down over my cock smoothly, taking me all the way to the hilt in my mind, and I lit my horn up to surround my shaft in my magic, that familiar tingling warmth wrapping around that twitching organ. I kept my eyes shut and focused on the fantasy of her sliding up and down, tongue messily licking and swirling around it, practically worshipping it while my magic began to ripple up and down along my cock. I was doing my best to mimic the motions I saw in my head, and my forelegs reached up to rest over the edges of the tub, hooves gripping at them a little tighter while my hips humped upwards, making the water slosh more noisily.

It somewhat surprised me at how into this I was getting. Usually it was just the sort of thing where I just kinda...crank one out real quick. I was thoroughly enjoying every second of this...even when my fantasies shifted in an entirely different direction.

Next thing I thought of, was what she would be like on top. I pictured one of those mares under her, tail raised and pinned against her back while Gadget's powerful forelegs held her tight, hips ramming roughly against her...oh yes, that was it. I felt my balls tightening against my body, my dick throbbing in the grip of my magic while my body arched up towards the source of my pleasure, that instinctual desire to push deep before release taking hold while I clenched my teeth.

Then I saw myself under Gadget instead, my front bent low to the ground, face contorted in a mix of pleasure and pain while that cock, far bigger than a pony my size should so recklessly take, plunged deep into me. I heard her grunt and I felt her hooves tightening their grip on my smaller frame, and in my mind I could see that cock twitching inside me as she pushed as deep as she could, just before....

The fantasy shattered while I let out a short, sharp cry, my entire body bucking on reflex while the head of my cock flared and thick, white ropes of cum gushed from my shaft, arcing in the air before landing in the water and on my throat and muzzle, making a significant mess of my face and the bath water. I panted and huffed, my magic furiously stroking over my shaft and milking me for every last drop I could possibly give before I was finally done. Every muscle went limp and I felt as if I were floating as my afterglow washed over me.

Oh, where the fuck did that last fantasy come from?

I could've fallen asleep right then and there, wrapped up in warmth and satisfaction as I was. Semen tended to get a bit clingy and tended to get stuck in your fur if you let it float around in water though, so after a few minutes of just soaking and enjoying the aftermath of my release, I pulled the plug on the drain and drew the shower curtains, turning the shower on and getting to work washing myself off.

I had to scrub at my muzzle for a bit, but overall it didn't take too long. I dried myself off after I got out and went through the usual motions of brushing my mane and tail, tending to my teeth, all the works. I was hungry, but way too tired to go out and grab a bite, especially after just brushing my teeth, so screw it.

I unceremoniously flopped onto my bed and used my magic to pull the covers over myself, wriggling about to get comfy before laying my head on the pillow. All the while, that last image ate away at me, that final fantasy I'd had just before that pushed me clean over the edge.

I'm not the type to be...like that. So why did the thought of it turn me on so much?

I pressed my face a bit deeper into my pillow and exhaled slowly, letting sleep wash over me. Tomorrow was another busy day, and I needed all the rest I could get. I wouldn't gain anything from laying there and thinking about that mare. That stupid, sexy mare.

The next day was practically a non-event, compared to the day before. Hours spent sifting through papers, heading out for small meetings here and there, dropping off paperwork...it was all such a hassle. There's plenty to be said about having lots of money, but it's interesting how no one talks about how fucking boring making said money can be. I mean yeah, maybe the first few times you fill out a stack of a hundred papers covering a hundred different things is pretty neat because you know it's going to make you lots of money, but eventually oh sweet Celestia, somepony save me from the Doldrum of Processed Trees!

It didn't help that I was thoroughly distracted through most of the day. That singular fantasy right at the end of my session last night kept coming back to me, and it kept making me squirm. I had better self-control than that! I don't know why I couldn't get it out of my head! I had to stop and just take a break a few times, clear my head and re-center myself. Meditation certainly helped, but it was always there, just waiting for a chance to draw my attention away from my work.

You can imagine the previous night wasn't the only time I got a load off.

"Is this what we're into now, penis?" I mumbled, lounging in my bathtub again and staring up at the ceiling. "You don't even have a purpose in that fantasy!"

As if my dick had a mind of its own, I saw the fantasy shift to include Gadget's magic jerking me off at the same time. I scowled and lifted my hooves out of the water, running them over my face and groaning in frustration.

"Ugh, Celestia fucking damn it, fuck you."

I wasn't in love with her. I knew that for a fact. What I was feeling wasn't any different from what I felt towards some random stud or mare I lured into my bedroom for a night of satisfying debauchery. This wasn't some amazing fluttering in my heart, it was a boiling in my loins. It was just stronger than I'd ever felt before.

Maybe it was the imposing figure, or the pretty eyes, or the scars, or it was just that she was bigger than me, I don't know! How was I supposed to know?! Being on bottom was generally new territory for me, it wasn't exactly something that happened very much!

I can only think of one time when I was genuinely satisfied being on bottom, and even then it was only because I was taken by surprise...not like, rape-y surprise, just that we slipped away into a room, and then he was on me.

It was back when I was fifteen, near the end of the year. Middle of winter, an ambassador from the Griffonstone Empire came to visit, along with his son. Razorbeak and his son Rending Talon, if I recall correctly. Griffons and their super-aggressive names, I swear...anyway, they were sent to speak with Celestia, and Rending Talon had been brought along to learn more about his father's position. He was supposed to take over once his father became too old, and his father certainly appeared to be getting on in his years. I believe he was in his late sixties at the time.

His son, however, was only a few months younger than I was, and I could tell upon meeting him that he was intrigued by me. It's a bit harder to read griffon facial expressions, beaks and whatnot, but ponies generally had a reflexive fight-or-flight response to the way he was looking at me. Amber eyes all focused and evaluating me like a piece of meat, trying to decide if his prey was worth the trouble.

Apparently I was.

He was doing his best to hide his enthusiasm when he asked me to dance, once the little soiree started and the music began to play, the pleasant sound of violins filling the ballroom. It would've been rude to simply say no, and whether I liked it or not, I was Celestia's student. While I would not take part in her conversations and dealings with the ambassador, it would be seen as a personal slight against him and his son if I refused. So, I danced.

He was remarkably good, for being someone so seemingly abrasive and large, in comparison to me. Most griffons were bigger than your average pony. He talked, he smiled, but his words were often harsh and snippy. He didn't really have a taste for his father's line of work, but he did what was expected of him. I couldn't fault him for that. Once the music stopped though, and everyone went to get some refreshments, he asked if I wanted to 'slip away from this dreadfully boring thing they call a party'.

That got a giggle out of me. Not a full-on laugh, but just a giggle. I agreed, and we snuck away just as ponies began to make their way back to the dance floor.

We wandered the halls once we were sure no one had noticed our escape. He told me how he wanted to be a historian, and learn the various methods of fighting all over the world. The wars of the past interested him greatly, and eventually we found ourselves making our way to the armory, where a few guards were milling about. They were wary of him, but as long as he was with me, there wasn't much of an issue.

He was disappointed that he couldn't touch the weapons, but when he told me he wanted to spar with one of the guards, he was surprised when I volunteered instead. There was something charming about how forward he was. No wasting time, just getting right to the heart of what he wanted. He was understandably unsure, considering the size difference, but one tap of my hoof to my horn silenced his hesitation. I agreed to not use any magic other than my telekinesis on top of my hooves, and he agreed to not use his claws...which really should've gone without saying, thinking back on it. They're razor-sharp claws.

Needless to say, he won the sparring match. His size and his claws had the clear advantage in claw-to-hoof combat, especially against a unicorn that didn't have the flexibility and mobility of a pegasus or the raw strength and sturdiness of an earth pony. I actually took a few good hits, and I was more than sure I had some bruised ribs, but I think he was impressed by my unwillingness to back down. I mean, until I got knocked clean on my back and he pinned me down by my throat, his other claw against my stomach.

There was a wild look in his eyes, and I just grinned up at him and thanked him for a good match. He thanked me as well, and helped me to my hooves. Some guards had gathered to watch, but once they were sure it was over, they went about their business as was expected of them. I had at least put up enough of a fight that he was wincing and rubbing his belly from a good punch I'd landed square in his center, once I'd forced him up onto his hindlegs, and with the way he was smiling, I could tell he was impressed that a unicorn of all things could actually put up any kind of fight without their magic.

He invited me back to his room. I was so taken with him at the time, how could I say no? Fighting him was invigorating...I could only imagine all that power being put to use in the bedroom as well. I did of course take the precaution of lighting my horn under the excuse of needing to massage my bad hindleg, reaching out with my magic and subtlely altering his perceptions of me. It needed to be done before anything too wild happened, for obvious reasons. It was cute that he offered to massage my leg for me, but I politely declined...though maybe I'd take him up on that later.

With that taken care of, we both walked with a certain urgency back into the castle and through the halls until we reached the room he was staying in while he was in Canterlot. A nice, lovely suite...that I didn't have the time to take in, nor did I care. The moment I was inside and the door was closed, I was grabbed and pulled into the air, pinned against the door by strong, large claws.

I opened my mouth to shout, only to find his beak pressing to my lips, his tongue invading my muzzle while my hindlegs kicked in a mix of confusion and fear...and just a little bit of excitement. His chest pressed against my barrel, and I felt his claws raking down through my fur, scratching over my skin and cupping under my rump, holding me up while he kissed me. Kissing griffons was awkward, but with how that tongue could curl and move, I didn't really mind at all.

He didn't waste much time. My heart was racing as those claws tightened their grip on me, and the world spun as his wings spread and he quickly took a short flight to the air, landing on the bed and letting me down with a heavy whump on the sheets. I tried to roll onto my side and get up so I could get undressed, but one of his claws pinned me down by my chest and the other went to work frantically removing my pants.

I reached down with my hooves to try to wrestle his claw off of me, but all he did was growl and slide those claws up higher, one of them pushing the very tip of a talon against my throat. I trembled just a little and looked up at him, that wild look in his eyes fading only a little as he leaned down and nipped gently at the side of my neck.

"Relax, pony...let nature take its course."

I think he was trying to be intimidating by saying that, and at the time I was certainly intimidated, but looking back on it now, I realize how much what he said didn't make a whole lot of sense. I kinda understand what he was getting at, but predators generally don't fuck their prey. Still, that look in his eyes...I recognized that. Even the position was reminiscent of when he pinned me while we were sparring.

At least he was patient enough to not rend my clothes while he removed them.

The moment my clothes were off...he took me. While I was entirely consenting, it wasn't in any way mutual. For the first time, the situation was entirely out of my control, and I was enjoying it too much to care. He flipped me over to my front, grabbed me by my tail and forced me to present myself to him, and I'll admit it...I was blushing like a little schoolfilly at how he was handling me.

He stared and evaluated, tasted and nipped at my flanks, and I twitched in alarm. My heart was trying to beat its way out of my chest and those claws were digging in ever-so-slightly at my waist, holding me in place while he rose up over me. I felt his talons rake over my skin, and I heard the growl deep in his chest while his arousal swelled against my rear, pushing between my cheeks and rubbing up and down slowly.

It was instinctual, how I froze up, but not once did he ever touch my horn. He understood enough about unicorns to know to treat those with respect...and I think he avoided it so I didn't outright panic underneath him. The way his claws pressed down on my withers and firmly rubbed over the muscles there, trying to soothe me while his head lowered down and rubbed along the side of my neck and over my jawline...it was oddly sensual and in conflict with everything else he did.

One of those claws firmly went down under my barrel and gripped at my chest, his hips swiveling just a bit, and all it took was a single smooth thrust before he was in me, all the way to the base. He wasn't particularly big...not compared to a pony anyways, down there. Most if not all griffon males can't compare to the size of a stallion, so to me it wasn't anything special until he began to move. Even then, it wasn't the thrusting that got me.

I felt fear. Fear and adrenaline and excitement, and while he began slowly, he quickly built into a powerful pace that had me quaking beneath him. He wasn't afraid to be rough with me. He cared little for the weakness in my right hindleg. He just grabbed, he mounted, and he took.

I was lost in an Elysium of his own making. An Elysium where prey is rutted into submission rather than killed.

My muscles trembled under the firm pointed grip of his claws, and my legs shuddered in their tension every time he rocked forward into me once again. There was a ferocity to him that had me melting within his grasp, and it wasn't long before I came around him, the first time of several that night. He ground against me and let me ride out that first release, my fluids coating his shaft and his balls, one of my forehooves desperately scraping at the bedsheet while I cried out into the room.

I was dazed for a moment as he pulled out of me and pushed me over onto my side, my entire body slumping weakly while I struggled to gather my bearings. My head was fuzzy and I was trembling all over, but I felt good. A kind of exhausted feeling like after a good round of sex, but amped up to eleven. My limbs felt unreliable, and I slowly tried to get back to my hooves, but a firm claw on one of my forelegs saw me rolled onto my back, and a dulled bird screech was followed by the sight of his head darting down and over my throat, his beak clamping down just a bit around my neck, just under my muzzle.

Immediately, my focus returned and a spike of adrenaline rushed through me, my entire body locking up while his panting, warm breath washed over my fur and skin. I let out a pitiful squeak of a cry, feeling utterly trapped and unable to do anything, some primal part of my mind believing that this was it. This was the moment where I died.

His beak moved away slowly, and he gave a small kiss to the corner of my lips, the wide and hungry grin on his face making me quiver just a little. I cracked a weak smile, and he rose up over me, that imposing figure of his hovering over my own, one of his claws reaching down to slip under my backside and lift it up off of the bed a little, my hindlegs splayed apart around his waist.

He rutted me like I was a prize to be enjoyed. My forehooves pressed to his chest, and for the first time I really took notice of how large he was. In my state of exhilaration, I realized that there was no way for me to get away from him even if I wanted to, and I felt my own shaft throbbing between us while he jackhammered into me with the same ferocity as earlier. He had remarkable stamina!

I felt his claw around my neck again, one of them pushing under my muzzle and urging me to tilt my head up, my throat on full display to him while he stared down at me, just taking in the sight of the mare he was ravaging. My hooves grabbed weakly at his arm, and he pressed his talons into the skin of my neck just a bit harder. Moments later, I cried out again and my marehood squirted around his cock a second time.

Rending trilled in delight at my apparent pleasure, but he'd clearly had enough fun playing with me. I felt his weight press down over me, and those powerful thrusts became a rapid-fire slapping against my flanks, my entire body trembling violently while he had his way with me. My cries never stopped, every thrust renewing those echoes of pleasure rippling through my body. All I could hear was myself, the groans and grunts from him, and the loud smack of his body against my own.

Then he bit down on my throat again, hard enough to make it feel like he drew blood.

My eyes shot wide-open, and my body visibly shook from how hard I tensed up. I screamed and I felt something in me break, my forelegs clinging tightly around the base of his neck while my eyes rolled back, his steadily-pounding hips pushing me over the edge with such an intensity that my mind went blank. My bad hindleg violently shook as I came for a third and final time, my juices soaking the sheets and the base of my tail while his wings spread and he slowly let go of my throat, his tongue licking the tinge of blood from his beak.

I actually whinnied in the midst of it all. I clearly remember that, since he made a point of mentioning it the next morning to jog my memory. He seemed quite proud of getting me to such a state.

Just as I began to come down from that blissful high, I felt him thrust into me as deep as he could, the bulbous base of his shaft swelling just a little while his wings spread wide and a loud, piercing bird screech echoed through the room. I felt his cock pulsing in me, cum gushing from his tip, and I weakly twitched under him while he finished inside of me.

My entire body went limp after a while, and my eyes drifted shut in the midst of my exhaustion, the adrenaline draining out of my bloodstream and leaving me feeling weak and worn out, as if I'd run a marathon chased by timberwolves. We rested there together, his sharp claws suddenly becoming careful and cautious as they felt over my body, soothing my trembling form, my breaths coming to me in semi-shaky panting and huffing.

Then he pulled out of me, and I noticed that my magic had faltered.

He saw it the moment he moved a little, and his eyes widened at the sight of my shaft between our bodies. He rose up in shock, and I panicked. My magic lashed out, and I shot several sleep spells at him to knock him out. He collapsed at the end of the large bed, his snores sounding off not a minute later after his eyes slid shut. My head flopped back down on the bed and I just...laid there. Unable, and unwilling to move. I felt the goofy smile on my lips, and weakly wheezed out a small laugh, forehooves lazily rubbing at the sheets while I basked in the warmth of my afterglow.

I had to alter his memories of that little discovery before I passed out, but until I could get my head on straight and my body moving, I was stuck just sitting there and feeling the deliciously tingly sensation of being thoroughly ravaged by a male that knew exactly what he was doing with me.

It was easily the best sex I'd ever had back then. I still somewhat regret not going for another round with him, down the line.

There were some similarities between him and Gadget, I realized. His size and build were intimidating to me back then, but not in a bad way. It excited me, on some level. The way he looked at me, the way he read me like an open book, took what he wanted from me when the opportunity was given, being so forward...far too many similarities.

Maybe I had a thing for size? Perhaps it was the idea of being preyed upon? I couldn't tell you. I never bothered to see a shrink to get my head examined. At the very least, I wasn't fantasizing about just Gadget anymore. I couldn't decide if that was better or worse. Stupid temptress of a mare....

I finished my soak and tucked myself into my bed for the night, knowing I'd have to prepare myself tomorrow. I'd already used magic to examine myself and see if she'd cast some sort of charm on me, and that was a no-go. Whatever this strong attraction was, it was very real and very physical. It was just something else I had to deal with, like any other temptations in my life.

I just had to convince myself that I had work to do. That was it.

I told myself that as I faded off to sleep. I told myself that in the shower the next morning. I told myself that while I ate breakfast in the cafeteria area downstairs in the hotel. I told myself that while going back to my room and taking a double-dose of my suppressants for the morning.

The medication spread through my body quickly, and I rapidly felt a clarity of mind as all sexual desire was pushed down along with the hormones being nullified in my bloodstream. It wasn't a smart thing for me to do, since doing that can cause a hormonal imbalance, but I was getting too agitated by it to keep on putting up with it.

I don't like not being in control. Especially when I'm not in control of myself.

I watched the time tick by while I looked over some paperwork I still had left over, doing everything to keep my mind occupied as noon drew closer and closer. I waited for the sound of hooves outside, and the tell-tale knock that would herald the arrival of the source of my current sexual frustrations.

I got through three small stacks of papers before she arrived. I took a few deep breaths to steady myself as I got up out of my chair, setting my legal work aside for now. My magic lit up and washed over my body as I slowly donned my disguise once more, using the clarity my overdose of medicine provided to get it done in record time.

It was just work. That was all. She was just a mare, I could control myself.

I stepped up to the door and turned the knob.

Author's Note

Soooo yeah. Sex scenes. Tasty!

Comments are always appreciated!

Chapter 18 - Traitor

written by Fire Soul

My right eye twitched at the sight of her. Even as calm as I felt on a fresh dose of my suppressants, still she stood there, tempting me. Fortunately, however...I was a bit more stable this time around. She wouldn't get to me that easily.

I felt the claws of my fantasy poking at the back of my brain, just daring me to say it again.

She'd cleaned herself up once more, her perfectly-brushed fur and mane only hampered slightly by the larger scars that she did her best to make up for. Even the smile she wore was smug, halfway to a grin, those lively green eyes of hers adding to what was already a fetching appearance. Her teeth were damn near perfect, all shiny and white and everything. Fuck my life.

"You look bothered by something," she muttered, her smile fading just a bit. "Everything okay? Why are you wearing a suit?"

I was actually surprised she asked. It wasn't exactly something anypony in our lines of work bothered with, in my experience. I mean, the kind of ponies I tend to spend my time around, anyways. Most nobles aren't any better, because unless they're one of those minor nobles that actually don't have their noses turned up so high towards the sky they could loop around and sniff their own assholes, any concern shown was usually just a part of their learned etiquette, not something genuine.

"Uh...I'm fine, the suit's how I normally dress," I muttered, stepping aside and motioning for her to come in. "Please, join me."

I remember thinking that I should've set out some drinks, but I believe my reasoning at the time was that I probably would've given her the wrong impression, more than I already did. In any case, she stepped inside and I closed the door behind her, flipping the lock with my magic. I saw her ear swivel at the sound, and the corner of her muzzle just barely lifted up into a cocky smirk. I was going to enjoy making that disappear.

She whistled quietly, making a circular motion in the air with her hoof. "Pretty nice place to be staying in. I have been in the suites though, so it is not quite as fancy."

"I can deal with a hovel as long as I've got privacy to do my work. Now then," I said, walking over to the TV and shutting it off. "Let's get down to business."

"Sure. My rates for personal visits are-"

"I'm not entertaining your jokes right now," I said stiffly, turning to face her once more. "I asked you to come here so I could offer you a job. Working for me."

"Hm. Интересно..." she muttered, rubbing her chin. "You are different from the other day."

"You caught me off-guard," I said, scowling at her just a little bit. "One does not expect to be welcomed into a room, only to find someone getting their dick sucked."

"That is not what I mean. You seem calmer and more focused, but your eyes are glossed over, as if you were sick," she explained, tilting her head a bit. "Are you sure you are okay?"

"I'm fine," I stated a bit louder than I intended. "Let's just get this over with. Before anything else, I want to see how strong your magic is. I've already seen your hoof-to-hoof skills."

She muttered something to herself in Gradios, and I quirked a brow. I didn't understand Gradios at all, it was kind of bordering on being a dead language, so there was no reason for being particularly fluent in it, but it sounded like she knew it just as well as she knew Equestrian. She didn't sound happy either.

"There a problem?" I asked.

"You really did not ask me here for sex?" she responded, her voice low and her posture just a bit deflated.

"No, I didn't! Is that all you think about?" I somewhat shouted at her, clenching my jaw.

"Нет. In that case, I cannot do anything for you," she said with a shrug. "I cannot stop working for my boss."

I frowned at that and let out a slow breath. "And why's that, exactly?"

"She has me under contract, and she has ordered me to never leave Stalliongrad. If I tried, my contract would be void, and she would have me killed."

"And if I promised you I would deal with her accordingly if you worked for me?"

"Alone? I would call you a fool and a liar," she said dismissively. "You cannot help me. If you do not mind, I will be leaving now."

I watched her turn and head for the door once more, reaching up with a hoof to undo the lock. I lit my horn and kept it secured firmly in place.

"No, you won't be," I said, tilting my head a little. "Have you considered what will happen to you once your charms cease to bring in the betting money she expects from you? She'll find someone to replace you. Some new champion she can usurp you with."

Her ears flattened against her skull while she turned to face me. "You say that like it is so easy...."

"I've seen that sort of thing countless times," I said, clearing my throat. "I'm ex-Mafia."

"There is no such thing as ex-Mafia," she said with a small chuckle. "You are either Mafia for the rest of your life, or you are killed by them."

"Believe what you want. The point still stands that even if she can't find a fighter better than you, she'll rig the fight against you," I said, smirking a little. "I give you maybe a year or two before you wind up in a shallow grave, if you stick with her."

She turned to face me once more, giving me a once-over. "You do not know my boss."

"No, but I know how businesses like this one work. If you don't believe me, why don't you ask the champion of the ring before you?"

She frowned at that, glancing off to the side in thought. "He has not been seen since I beat him and took his place."

"Yeah...and I guarantee you never will see him again."

Her gaze returned to me, and it was like looking at a different mare. She seemed worried now...contemplative. Gone was the swagger and confidence she had when I saw her the other day. The way her brow furrowed and her tail twitched nervously this way and that behind her, I could tell she was thinking about it a bit more carefully now.

"You never considered it before, did you?" I asked. "What about the champion before him?"

Gadget shrugged. "Some mare. She disappeared too."

I hummed a little. "Think it's a coincidence?"

"...I knew my boss was a complete говно, but..." she muttered, shaking her head slowly. "This does not seem like something she would do."

"What, because she's nice enough to send mares to your room?" I said with no small amount of snark. "Considering how much you have sex on your brain, she probably realized that was the easiest way to keep her best money-maker satisfied. Why would you ever leave?"

"Say I believe you," she uttered slowly, sitting down and giving me a hard look. "Why would you bother to help me?"

I shrugged a little. "You're the one closest to your boss's operations that I can speak to. I could've found others, but that would take too long. Not to mention, I hate to see good potential go to waste."

"Because I can fight? That cannot be the only reason."

"It isn't," I said, smiling just a little more. "You weren't the only one doing some evaluating."

She just stared at me, waiting for a proper answer. I shrugged it off and reached out with my magic for my cigar case that I'd left sitting on the nightstand. I flipped it open and pulled two of them out, bringing them over and lighting one with my magic. I took a deep drag of it and held the other out to her, but she quickly scrunched her muzzle and waved it off.

"I do not touch the stuff." she said, shaking her head.

"Your loss."

"Yours, more like. Those will kill you."

"Maybe, but that's my choice," I said to her, floating the other cigar back to where I got it from. "Anyway, you wanted a proper answer...alright. I suppose I am expecting you to take a lot on faith and unproven theories."

She snorted at that. "No kidding."

"Fine. Your ability to fight was what drew me in, but the meeting with you in your room said a lot more," I said, tapping my chin. "Your hoof-to-hoof skills are significant, but unrefined. You have an innate skill for reading your opponent, no doubt a part of your ability to read others so well simply by interacting with them. I can only imagine how good you could be if you got proper training in some form of martial arts."

"Da, I have never had any training, that is true. What else?" she asked, seeming a bit more interested now.

"Your ability to read me so well particularly intrigued me, once I met you face-to-face," I continued, taking another puff of my cigar and blowing it up into the air. "You have an air of confidence about you that I've not seen in many other ponies. You read me like an open book, from my attraction to you right down to the way I walk. Even that kiss was a test on your part, right?"

She fidgeted a little. "How did you-er, wait," she said suddenly, perking up. "So you are attracted to me?"

"I have experience with this sort of thing, and my potential attraction to you isn't important," I stated firmly. "Leave it be."

"I am pretty sure this is important!"

"Leave. It. Be. All that matters is that you figured me out through simple body language," I said with a firm stamp of my forehoof. "You're not getting under this tail."

She actually grinned at me, a cheeky thing flashing those pearly whites. "We will see about that."

I huffed a little in frustration at how sure she was of herself. It was like she'd already decided...and I couldn't help but fidget a little. I wasn't used to being treated like that, but apparently just fidgeting a little said everything to her, because her grin only widened. I resisted the urge to yell at her. Believe me, I so very much wanted to.

"Anyway...." I grumbled, taking a deep drag of my cigar and focusing on the gentle flavor of it for a moment, steadying myself. "More than anything else though, what impressed me was your accent."

Gadget stared at me blankly for a moment, her ears twitching a little. "What?"

I actually grinned back at her. "While you read body language and reactions, I gather information and compare it to what I've learned and my own life experiences," I explained to her. "You don't get that accent by speaking Equestrian as your first language. You were raised on it."

"Da? So?" she asked, tilting her head a bit. "Why is that impressive?"

"Well it wasn't at first," I said, blowing another puff of smoke from my nostrils in a slow exhale. "Then you mentioned that you never went to school. No formal education. So tell me, where exactly did you learn to speak Equestrian? How long ago?"

She blinked a few times and looked off to her left. "I am not sure, actually. It was a very long time ago."

"Equestrian is notoriously difficult to learn unless you grew up with it," I continued. "It may seem simple to me, but I've studied other languages. There are so many caveats to Equestrian it borders on nonsensical. So based on what I know, I can only assume that you learned Equestrian through exposure and self-teaching after you were older."

"I still do not see how this is impressive."

I smiled a little. "You have a capacity to learn, one that you underestimate. You and many like you...and as I have said, I hate seeing good potential go to waste. The only thing I haven't seen is what you can do with your magic, which is why I asked to see it earlier."

"So...what, you want me to work for you so you can educate me?" she asked, pff'ing and waving a hoof at me. "No thank you."

I shook my head quickly. "That's entirely up to you. I'm giving you a chance to escape from what I know for certain will eventually happen to you if you stick with your boss."

I sat down and enjoyed my cigar for a time while she stared me down, our gazes meeting for a time before she looked away, towards the floor. She was quiet, and I could almost hear the gears turning inside her head while she processed exactly what I was trying to say.

"You want me to work for you..." she said slowly, tapping her chest with a hoof. "Because you want to see what I am really capable of?"

"You're close. I would like you to work for me, but you don't have to if you don't want to. Rather, I want to give you an opportunity to do more with your life," I said calmly. "Though I would like it if we met up in Canterlot regardless."

"Alright...I do not...ugh," she muttered, groaning in frustration. "There has to be a catch. There is always a catch!"

"When I worked for the Mafia, I ran into several ponies like you," I explained, unable to help a small smile. "Ponies with talent, and I always gave them a choice. Some of them chose to work for me, some didn't. I chose to lead those that worked for me by securing their loyalty as much as possible, preferably through what kindness I could afford to show them in my position."

"This is all kinds of suspicious..." she muttered, her ears flattening against her skull. "Why should I not go straight back to my boss with everything you are telling me?"

I grinned just a little, pulling my cigar from between my lips. "Because if you do, she'll know you've been talking to someone that plans on either taking her out, or taking over her business. That won't color you in a pretty light...of course, you could always act like we never had this conversation too, in which case I'd wind up being your boss either way."

"Fffuck, you are right...cукин сын..." she groaned out. "Alright, what the fuck do you need from me?"

"Well, first of all..." I said, my horn glowing just a bit brighter. "I'd like to test the strength of your magic."

She narrowed her gaze and frowned. "Why does my magic matter so much?"

I gave her a funny look, quirking my brow at her. "You're a unicorn. How does your magic not matter?"

She pawed at the floor with a hoof nervously, reaching up to rub over the back of her head and run that hoof down over her spiky mane. I only became more curious when that hair bounced right back into place, as if it hadn't been touched at all.

"Fine," she sighed out. "Let us get this over with."

I nodded and stood up slowly, leaving my cigar in the ashtray while snuffing out the fire in it. Instead of preparing myself, I waited for her to attack me, my magic at the ready to deal with whatever she sent my way. Lacking an education and any kind of arcane training, it would've surprised me more if she'd been capable of anything outside of her telekinesis.

As it stood, her performance with magic was underwhelming at best. When I instructed her to reach out for me and try to move me, no matter what, I fought back against her grip with ease. It wasn't even a strain. She kept on trying to push, and I kept holding her back without anything more than a token effort on my part. I wasn't disappointed, though.

Her horn fizzled out, and she rubbed the side of her head, frowning to herself and lowering her head a little. She almost looked ashamed.

"Not bad," I said, humming a little. "Not good either. Your magic is under-developed. You don't use it much, do you?"

"Nah. I have always preferred my hooves." she said quietly, her voice just a few decibels above a whisper.

"I see," I said, nodding. "Yes, you'll do just fine."

"For what?"

I smiled at her. "I'll tell you later, if you decide to work for me. For now, I just need some information from you...."

Gadget scoffed at me and turned her head away. "Whatever you say, Canterlot."

I stared at her for a moment, her words not quite registering immediately. "Uh, what?"

"You know. Canterlot," she said, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. "Capital of Equestria, seat of power, home of soft, uptight, snobby ponies? I figured it would be a perfect nickname for you."

"Oh, for fuck's sake!" I shouted suddenly, smacking my muzzle with a hoof.

I had to just...take a moment, you know? Another fucking nickname?! What, is that just a thing for ponies to do when it comes to me? I took the time to breathe deep and slowly exhale to settle myself down, even as Gadget leaned away from me in surprise and held a foreleg in front of herself.

"Geez, what?! What is the problem?" she asked quickly.

"Nothing! Er, nothing. Nothing at all," I said, clearing my throat. "Just...let's get this over with."

She stayed quiet for a moment, then shrugged and relaxed. "Sure, alright Canterlot."

I managed to restrain the urge to smack her with my magic, but I couldn't hold back the twitching of my eye. If this were back when I was ten, I'd have already been plotting a way to get back at her. As it stood I was just focused on what I needed to get out of her right that moment.

At least one of us was being professional about this.

Her boss's name was Ruby Red, a non-Stalliongradi pegasus that most likely hailed from Cloudsdale, given what Gadget knew of her history. Pretty apple-red fur and feathers accompanied a lighter, less lively shade of salmon red mane and tail. Auburn eyes and a wily disposition rounded out what actually mattered from Gadget's description of her. Her ability to give Gadget a wild ride in bed really didn't factor into anything outside of a vague measurement of her potential stamina and strength.

What mattered most however, was the fact that she was ex-Armada. The Armada is a specialized pegasus-only branch of the Royal Guard, mainly situated in Cloudsdale, that is trained in anti-magic aerial combat. They uphold the ancient militaristic traditions from way back when Cloudsdale was just an extension of Pegasopolis. Of course, they left the xenophobia behind. Pegasopolis used to be amazingly xenophobic towards earth ponies, and to a lesser extent us unicorns. They respected us for our powerful magic and ability to blast them out of the sky with nothing more than our horns.

Then they developed a way of countering our magic. An entirely self-reliant way that utilized their own natural magic. That was and still is a skill the Armada specializes in, and I could only hope at the time that this Ruby Red was ex-Armada because she failed to learn it. They're a lot like the Wonderbolts, except they have consistent military duties that have nothing to do with putting on shows for adoring fans.

These days, they're usually called into action to deal with rogue unicorns performing illegal magic practices. Other than that, they usually stay in Cloudsdale, or other cloud-based cities. You'll rarely see them anywhere else, unless they're delivering messages or visiting relatives.

Other than that, I got the usual stuff from Gadget. A general description of the firepower they had in Ruby's home, a quick sketch of the layout...not that it would be all that helpful. She hadn't been to Ruby's house as much as I'd hoped she'd been, given they apparently slept together fairly often. I suppose that wasn't surprising. Gadget was the kind of mare that'd fuck her boss without a second thought, if the opportunity presented itself. Probably wouldn't even think of getting a bonus out of it either, the good pussy is an acceptable payment in and of itself.

It didn't help that Gadget's memory of this stuff wasn't all that great, not to mention she hadn't spent much time at the house. What she was able to give me information on was sparse at best, to the point of being almost completely useless. The house was big, an old abandoned apartment building refurnished and rebuilt on the inside to be a single large house just for her. A real low-key mansion that didn't look like a mansion. I'd seen houses like that before, and while they weren't popular, they were deceptively smart. She can keep a lot of her guards housed there instead of them having to constantly come and go, changing shifts and leaving openings in security.

"Anything else? Any further details I could use to my benefit?" I asked while writing on a few pieces of paper.

"Well, she has a butler and some other servants to keep the place clean, but other than that...not too much," Gadget told me, shrugging a little. "There is not much competition for her out here."

"Loyalty of her servants?"

"Bought, of course. Why?"

I simply nodded and pondered on that. "Wish I had more time to really stake this place out...I'd hate to leave this until the night before I head home."

"Hey, Canterlot!" she said a bit louder, drawing my attention. "Why does this matter?"

"Oh! Well, I have no reason to kill them. I'll have to make an active effort to avoid putting a bullet in any of them," I said casually, looking back to my papers. "While they may not be innocent, Ruby has not earned their loyalty. She has merely bought it, something I can do just as easily, once I take her place. Sleep spells should do the tri - Actually, now that I think about it, does she have magic detection security in place?"

That shit was the bane of unicorns that made a living sneaking their way in and out of places. That specific form of security was designed to detect and alert those in charge of it to foreign magic being cast within a given area. It made being sneaky about my magic impossible, because the moment I wound up having to use one of my spells, it'd go off and I'd have security crawling up my ass. There's a reason I got good at being quiet, careful, and reliant on my firearms. Sure, this security wasn't cheap, but I'd dealt with quite a few richer targets. I had to adapt.

"No, she has nothing like that."

"Guh, thank Celestia...but at this rate, I might still have to stake the place out before I make any more, damn it," I muttered to myself, tapping my chin with my pen. "Very irritating."

"You are serious about doing this alone?" she asked me, walking up next to me to read what I was writing down.

"Well it's not like I came to Stalliongrad intending to do this," I mumbled, looking over to her curiously. "You seem very sure that she wouldn't sell. Why is that?"

She hummed and tilted her head this way and that. "For how wily Ruby can be, she is very proud. She built that arena with her own four hooves, and several have approached her trying to purchase it. She has never sold, and one of them offered her ten million bits once."

That...well, that pretty much settled it in my mind. I only had six million in my suitcase, and that arena sure wasn't worth ten million! I took my time writing out a plan of action while Gadget just kinda...watched me work. It was a little creepy, I'll admit. Thankfully, the silence didn't last forever.

"You are crazy, da? Undeniable."

"Why do you say that?" I asked.

"A single pony cannot take on so many guards at once," she said dismissively. "You will die without help."

I snorted in amusement and shook my head. "I've been doing this since I was a little filly."

"I doubt that," Gadget said, walking away from me and looking around the room. "I still do not know why I am helping you."

"Because I made a strong case for it being in your best interests?" I offered, tilting my head a little.

"Yeah, but I do not know you," she said, frowning just a bit at me. "Why should I trust you?"

I furrowed my brow in thought, taking a deep breath and setting my papers and pen down. How could I get her to trust me? I could've toyed with her head, I suppose. My magic outstripped hers with ease, it wouldn't be hard, but...well, it didn't seem right. Every action has a price, and I didn't like the idea of twisting the mind of a potential ally at the risk of being found out later on. No, I had a way to secure her trust...I just didn't like it.

"Well, I have a way to secure your trust...but if I show you this, when you get to Canterlot, you work for me, plain and simple," I said, walking over to her and holding out a hoof. "Deal?"

"...That depends on what you have to show me."

I retracted my hoof and nodded. "I am not who I appear to be. I am a noble of Canterlot. My fur, mane and tail colors are all false, a part of my disguise. I am ex-Mafia. If you agree to work for me, I will show you exactly who I am."

I sat there for a moment, both of us staring at each other while I awaited her answer. I could understand if she fully intended to leave right then and there, but...well, though I may be a bit of a loner, I'd learned a long time ago that no one pony could do everything on their own. I could have found help elsewhere, but she had potential I wanted to exploit. I would do whatever it took to have her work for me. I wasn't above letting my facade fall a little if it meant getting good help.

Her face went through a veritable menagerie of expressions, but when she finally reached a hoof out to me, I took it without hesitation. A rush of relief coursed through me, and I couldn't help but smile. It was a step in the direction I wanted things to go, though I was still hesitant about revealing who I actually was to her.

"Thank you," I sighed out, stepping back and clearing my throat. "I mean that. Really."

"Yes, well, I am not the sort to leave a fair maiden in such distress!" she said, swelling her chest out and straightening her posture a little.

I just gave her a flat look and shook my head. "Moment ruined. Whatever, anyways, may as well take care of this like ripping off a bandage."

There was only a brief moment of hesitation as I lit my horn with magic once more. I worked through the spell arrays I'd laid over my fur and my hairs, carefully taking them apart while my colors slowly changed back to their usual appearance. I had closed my eyes to focus, since the opportunity was presented to me, though I kept some of my focus on my hearing to make sure she didn't make any sudden moves.

The look on her face was priceless, once I opened my eyes again.

"There is...there is no way," she said, her wide-eyed stare and partially-slack jaw doing plenty to make me have to hold back a laugh. "You are not Twilight Sparkle."

I smiled and cleared my throat. "I am Twilight Sparkle of House Sparkle. If you've ever watched TV, you've seen me in several interviews."

"Without color, it is hard to say," she said, looking me over several times, her eyes wandering up and down, taking me in. "But you definitely sound like her. You even have the bad leg."

"When did you notice that?" I asked, blinking a few times. "I put a lot of focus into keeping that hidden."

She shrugged and looked away. "You probably walked a long way to get to the arena, and those stairs are no joke for soft flabby ponies. I bet your leg was very sore."

I sighed and nodded to her. "Yeah, it was...but why didn't you say anything before? Wait, did you just call me flabby?"

"Well, those rich Canterlotian sweets and meals have to go somewhere, Canterlot," she said with a grin. "Anyway, a lot of ponies get crippled. It is rude to point out their disability, or treat them like some special snowflake because of it. Very demeaning towards them."

"I see," I stated casually, cracking a faint smile. "Well, thank you."

"That being said...there is no way you can be Twilight Sparkle."

"Why's that?" I asked, floating my cigar back over from the ashtray and re-lighting it, taking a slow drag.

"Because the student of Princess Celestia would not be here, doing these things!" she exclaimed, pointing a hoof at me accusingly. "You are a fake and a liar."

I frowned at the accusation, but I did my best to let it slide. Instead, I reached out to the phone and began to dial my home number, smiling wider and glancing over at Gadget for a moment. She just gave me a confused look.

"What are you doing?" she asked slowly.

I just shrugged and flicked my tail happily. "Calling Spike. You know, my son? The dragon?"

She looked at the phone for a moment, then back to me. "Why are you doing that?"

"Because you're making this difficult!" I said with no small amount of irritation. "I have no way of proving my identity beyond what I've shown you. I have the injury, I have my voice, the colors, my fucking wardrobe....!"

"Hey, whoa, calm down!" she said suddenly, trying to cut me off. "I did not mean to piss you off!"

"Yeah, well...I know you didn't!" I shouted, huffing and slamming the phone down on the receiver with my magic. "I just don't have the resources or time I need to prove anything. You have no reason to trust me outside of my word...and my appearance, but considering how quickly I tried to recruit you, you have every reason to be suspicious."

"Twilight Sparkle, the student of Princess Celestia herself, showing up at an illegal underground fighting ring and trying to recruit me to work for her? No, why would I ever find that suspicious?" she asked, the sarcasm almost palpable in her voice.

"Funny. Everything I said about myself was true though," I said, settling down with a quick puff of my cigar. "I was recruited by the Mafia when I was six. Got out of the game when I was thirteen."

"Well, maybe I can help you with that whole not having enough time thing," she said to me, humming a little. "I am in."

I sat there, unable to speak for a moment. It was such a sudden turn-around that I had to take a moment to actually process it.

"...Uh. What?"

"I am in. Whatever this plan of yours is. You would die if you tried to take her out on your own," she said, looking around the room once more. "Do you even have a weapon?"

"Of course I do! Wait," I said, holding up a hoof. "What's with you suddenly going along with me? I thought you said I was a fake and a liar."

"Well, I did not think of it too much when you first mentioned it before, but there is no reason for me to say no," she said, walking over to my nightstand and pulling the drawer open. "Huh, no condoms...no gun either. That is where I would have put it."

"I didn't plan on having sex during this trip," I muttered quickly. "What did I say to change your mind?"

"The whole thing, about her killing me in a rigged match. It makes sense, and Ruby is all about making money," she said, moving to hop onto my bed and nestle into it, flopping onto her back. "Ooh, this is comfy! No silk sheets though."

"....You're really a laid-back sort, aren't you?" I asked, walking over towards the bed and sitting down next to it. "You're about to lose your livelihood."

"What, you think this is my first job or something?" she asked, her forelegs twitching as she wriggled to settle into the bed more, groaning happily. "Better bed than the one at the arena...but, da, not my first job. More honest than the ones I did before."

"Well, I'd ask, but I need to get ready, and you need to get to Canterlot," I said, walking over to my suitcase and flipping it open. "There's a cheap inn located in the Red District, I can give you some bits to stay there until...well, sometime around the beginning of next week."

"Next week as in, tomorrow?"

"No, next week as in the week after this upcoming week."

"Then you should have just said that. Less confusing."

I rummaged through my suitcase until I found my goal. A small automatic pistol, the good ol' 1911, complete with a silencer. I'd taken the time to pick one up back in Canterlot. I wasn't much of a fan towards automatic pistols since they made a habit of jamming if you didn't take consistent care of every little part, but having nine rounds before you need to reload can be useful. Plus, I can't put a silencer on a revolving pistol...well, not yet anyways. I'm sure technology will make that sort of thing possible one day.

I had picked up a cleaning kit for it as well, buuuut...I only had four magazines of ammo for it. Not exactly top-notch preparation, but I could make four magazines work. Nine rounds per magazine, that's thirty-six shots. That was doable, in my situation.

I slid one of the magazines into the pistol and pulled the chamber back, letting things click into place before casually holding the gun up in my magic and looking down the sights of it. "If I didn't make it confusing, it just wouldn't have that Twilight Sparkle touch to it."

"Hah! I like you! You can take a joke," she said, sitting up suddenly and yawning. "So yeah, I am not going to Canterlot. I am going to stay here and help you."

"Uh, no, you're not. You're getting on a train to Canterlot!"

"Uh, no, I am not!" she said, grinning a cheeky little grin at me. "Look cutie, you might be Twilight Sparkle, you might not. That does not matter. Point is, you need help, and I can help. So I will head out, then I will be back, and we can take care of this."

"Okay, maybe I wasn't clear enough," I said, sliding the magazine out of the gun once more before beginning to disassemble it with my magic. "You're getting on the train, I'm killing your ex-boss tonight, and I'm taking control of her business, and the reason is because I don't know you well enough to trust you to have my back. Simple enough for you?"

"Da, and you plan on doing it alone."

"I'm nothing if not efficient. Trust me, I've been doing this since I was a child."

"Does not matter!" she said happily, looking over at me. "Going to join me on the bed?"

"Absolutely not."

"That is a shame," she said, faking a pout. "Guess I will have to keep trying. For now, I will get ready to deal with my old boss."

"What did I just-!" I began to say, but she quickly cut me off.

"Look Canterlot," she said, louder than she needed to, but she was intent on getting her point across. "If you really are Twilight Sparkle, and you wind up dead, I am out of a job, and I believe that working for you would be a pretty sweet deal. So, I am going to keep your cute ass safe until we get back to the capital and you can prove it. You understand now?"

I considered arguing with her more. She was being insufferably stubborn about this, but there was no denying that she made a good point. It was a fairly large risk to take her along, especially since she could've been playing me for a fool the entire time, but my odds were far better with some assistance.

However....

"Did you just call me cute?" I asked tersely, clenching my jaw.

"No, I called your ass cute. Big difference," she said, grinning wide. "And what a nice ass it is....!"

"...You're going to be a chore to put up with. Fine," I said, entirely feeling a hundred and ten percent done with her at the moment. "Just...I don't know, go get yourself ready, then come back here! Be back by five this evening!"

She mock-saluted, striking a stiff pose, akin to a Royal Guard. Fitting, really.

"Yes ma'am, Canterlot ma'am!" she said, performing the motions fairly accurately.

I watched her begin to leave, only to stop next to me and lean in, getting all up in my personal space. I turned my head to glare at her, feeling confused by the odd action...only to get a kiss square on the lips yet again. She held it for longer than before, and credit where it's due: I managed to restrain the urge to punch her square in the jaw. No, I just jerked away as soon as I realized what was happening, giving her chest a firm push with a forehoof to make her back off.

"Gah! Seriously, what the fuck?!" I shouted, resisting the urge to grit my teeth. "Do you do that with every mare you take interest in?!"

"Pff, no! It is just adorable how hard you try to hide how much you like it," she said, reaching and giving one of my cheeks a poke with the tip of her hoof. "Look at you! You are blushing like you are smuggling tomatoes in your cheeks! And the way you pout, так мило!"

I hissed in a deep, deep breath through my clenched teeth, slowly letting the air out through my nostrils once more before I dared to speak. "I believe you had better things to do than risking me taking a restraining order out on you?"

She smirked and swished her tail at me, standing up and stepping past me. "Very few things are better than enticing cute mares-"

"Just get out of here!" I shouted, quickly covering my muzzle with a hoof in surprise. It was very rare that anyone could make me lose my cool to such an extent....

"Woo, fine! Touchy touchy," she said, rolling her eyes while a smug smile adorned her lips. "You really should loosen up, Canterlot."

The last thing I heard from her was the door being unlocked, and her stepping out into the hall. The moment I heard the door close, I exhaled loudly and walked over to my bed, hopping up onto it and reaching out with my magic for my cleaning kit. I set the disassembled pistol down on the sheet next to myself and got to work, starting with vigorously using the tiny brush to clean out the detached barrel.

Oh, I was feeling heated. Not because I was embarrassed, but because she had such an easy time pushing my buttons. Not to mention she did it intentionally! That irritating bitch had a lot of nerve, considering she was going to be working for me! Maybe I'd make her clean up after Spike next time he had an accident, and I'd make her use her Celestia-damned mouth, talented as it seems to be at getting under my skin!

...Wait, that didn't come out right. You know what I meant!

"Bet she's got a million restraining orders from every mare in Stalliongrad, arrogant little...."

I grumbled to myself, slowly letting my mind get lost in the act of cleaning all the little pieces of my pistol. Gadget returned at some point, long before five, and she went to work cleaning up her own pistol...and she was oddly silent. I expected her to blab on and tease me more, but as it stood, she just kept working, just as I was.

Huh. Maybe this wouldn't be as bad as I thought.

Author's Note

You have no idea how tempted I was to name this chapter TR-8R. That stormtrooper from Force Awakens is still a badass for what he did, don't care what anyone says.

As always, comments are welcome and appreciated! I love 'em and live for 'em.

This chapter is heavy, and I mean heavy, on dialogue. It may interest you all to know that dialogue is actually my weakest point in writing. I hate it. Hate it with such a passion that the sun is intimidated by it. Yet I write chapters like this...and wonder why I get writer's block.

:derpytongue2:

Also, I used Google Translate for the Russian words because I don't speak Russian and I know no one that can read or speak Russian. Fun!

Chapter 19 - Infiltration

written by Fire Soul

We sat there in silence for a time, the occasional sound of metal clinking together the only accompanying noise between us. She was oddly serious about the work she was doing, taking care of her own gun, but I didn't recognize the model. It was odd, actually. I knew my pistols pretty well, though anything outside of that was usually in need of a refresher course since I rarely used anything outside of easy-to-carry pistols, revolvers...aaand maybe the occasional sawed-off and tommygun.

To say it was surprising was entirely accurate at the time. She goes from flirtatious and forward to completely quiet and serious within the span of...what, just a couple hours? It was only three-thirteen in the afternoon, there was a good chance we'd have plenty of time to wait. I doubted she had anything else to do that day...unless she was honestly hoping for a booty call before taking out her ex-boss.

Normally I'd have some kind of music on, doing work like this. Something soothing, like smooth jazz, or some classical, but stuffing a gramophone into my suitcase wasn't exactly high on the priority list over other essentials, so all we had was our idle tinkering and the shuffling of our hooves. Without anything else aside from very distracting television programming, I decided to risk it and attempt to hold a conversation with her.

"So...what kind of pistol is that?" I asked, motioning to the disassembled parts she had laid out on the carpet, atop a towel she'd retrieved from the bathroom.

"Oh, this? Nothing special. Just a modded Makarov," she said, the light green glow of her horn flowing over the parts while she used a few borrowed bits from my cleaning kit to tend to her own bits and baubles. "Larger magazine capacity, higher muzzle velocity...no silencer though."

I frowned. "That'll be a problem. We can deal with that just fine though. Actually," I said, tapping my chin a little. "You seem to really know what you're doing."

"I like tinkering with things," she said, shrugging a little. "Got my mark for it."

"What, messing with guns?"

"Huh? Oh! No. I was just building a toy for a little filly when I was just a little filly myself," she said, grinning ever-so-slightly. "I really got into it. It had to be perfect, it was going to be a birthday present! So I poured everything I had into it. Next thing I know, I am coming out of my focus on it, and everyone is cheering around me because I just got my cutie mark."

"Huh. That's almost an anti-climax, compared to some of the cutie mark stories I've heard," I said, flicking an ear before reaching up to scratch it. "My entrance exam to Celestia's school was pretty monumental, though it wasn't the receiving of my cutie mark that was so amazing."

"I saw that in the papers. You were interviewed after it happened, da?" she asked, reaching out for the small brush I had in my magic. I gave it to her without fuss, I was just about done with it anyways. "You said you had a strange magic surge."

"Embarrassing to admit, but yes," I said slowly, flicking my tail in irritation. "They gave me a test to see how I would respond to failure. Instead, I wound up digging deeper than I'd ever dug into myself before, and broke through a mental block. What I got out of it was the prestige of becoming Celestia's protege, aaand then I became the single parent of a dragon hatchling."

"Sounds rough," she muttered, the edge of her hoof tapping on a small spring, the little piece of metal held up in front of her eyes so she could take a close look at it. "I have no desire for kids."

I smirked and kept my focus on my gun parts. "Should probably stop sticking your dick in cute mares then."

She barked out a laugh and glanced over at me. "You are funny, Canterlot! That will never happen. Mares are one of the greatest delights in the world! To think I would ever give them up, сумасшедшая пони...."

I snorted at that and rolled my eyes. "Oh yes, Celestia forbid you go on suppressants and find other things to do with your spare time."

She perked up at that suddenly and her eyes darted in my direction. "You know anything about that poison?"

"Poison? What, because of the side-effects?"

"Oh sure, just side-effects!" she said, the sarcasm in her tone not lost on me. "Just long-term use resulting in future hormonal imbalances that could result in physical and psychological problems! Weight gain, sterility, erectile dysfunction-"

"Yes, I'm aware of the side-effects!" I said quickly, cutting her off. "It's not like you couldn't just go off of them before you turn thirty."

"Da, because the side-effects are guaranteed to only happen in your thirties, right?" she said, giving me the flattest stare I'd ever seen. "I do not think so. I just adjusted to not being on them. Plus, when puberty hit, I could not afford them. The good ones are expensive."

"Uh...health insurance?" I offered, pausing my work and setting the parts down carefully, in a more organized fashion.

"I grew up in an orphanage way out on the edges of the poorer areas, outside of the fancy area this hotel is located in," she explained, motioning around the room with a hoof. "None of us could afford health insurance, let alone quality suppressants. By the time I could afford it, I was already adjusted to my hyperactive libido. At least I am not popping boners left and right like I was back when I was eleven!"

Oh, I knew all about that. Lewd mental images of Celestia in various compromising positions, along with me popping a boner in the middle of having tea with her all came rushing back to me, but thankfully, the fairly significant dose of suppressants I'd taken was still in effect. I dismissed such thoughts like I would thoughts about the Super Bowl: utterly uninteresting and just getting in my way.

"I imagine that was embarrassing, huh?" I said, slipping off the bed and stretching out my limbs, having been sitting still for far too long.

"I smacked one of the fillies at the orphanage with my erection on accident," she said flatly, setting her parts down as well. "You tell me."

I covered my muzzle with a hoof, struggling to hold back my laughter. "Oh geez! Wow, I bet she never talked to you again!"

"Eh, I rut her every once in a while," she said, shrugging it off and standing up. "No big deal. It was embarrassing at the time!"

"...Touche," I said quietly, blinking a few times. "I legitimately didn't see that coming."

She just chuckled and stood up, looking down at her parts for a moment before lighting up her horn, carefully picking up one piece, then another, using her magic to piece her pistol back together part by part. I wasn't quite done cleaning mine, so I left it all on the bed and went into the bathroom to do my business and take a quick shower. I needed some time alone, and the shower was the closest thing to that, short of telling her to leave for a while. That would've been rude, however.

I sat there for a time and let the hot water cascade over me, soaking my fur and helping me relax. Despite the loud pitter-patter of water raining down over me, the soothing sensation made it a remarkably good place to just sit down, meditate, and collect my thoughts. Not as good as a bath, but I didn't exactly trust those at the moment. Plus, there was a relative stranger in my hotel room. I wasn't gonna just kick back in a bathtub with her around.

This turned out to be a good thing since I failed to lock the bathroom door.

"Hey Canterlot, mind if I join you?"

I damn near shrieked when I saw her silhouette on the other side of the shower curtain. She was in the process of peeking her head in around the side of it, and I curled in on myself and covered my underside as best I could with my tail, my good hindleg raised to keep that specific part of myself hidden.

"Well?" she asked, tilting her head. "Can I-"

"What the fuck is wrong with you?!" I shouted at her, my horn lighting up. "Get out!"

Her head jerked back out of the shower, but I could still see her standing there, startled and stumbling back onto her flank from my outburst. I could feel my right eye twitching incessantly, and it took some serious self-control for me to not just blast her.

"Shit, sorry! I mean, what did I-"

I didn't bother to let her finish. I grabbed her with my magic, pushed the bathroom door wide open and tossed her out without hesitation. A quick snap of my magic slammed the door shut with a loud bang, and a small click of the lock secured my privacy yet again. I slumped in the shower and laid there in the tub for a moment, just letting the water fall over my back for a time.

She'd gone too far that time, and I think she knew it. She probably just didn't know what she'd done. I turned the water off a moment later and stomped out of the tub, rapidly scrubbing my fur dry and twisting the air around myself to dry the remaining dampness off, a flick of a switch turning the overhead vent on to let the steam air out. I wiped off the mirror and went to work brushing my mane and my tail down before slipping my clothes back on and yanking the bathroom door open.

She was standing there nervously, though she also looked a little miffed at what I'd done to her. She stood up the moment I stepped out of the bathroom, as if she expected me to just throw down with her immediately.

"What was that about, Canterlot?!" she asked, raising her voice at me.

"Okay," I said while stamping a hoof against the carpet. "Some ground rules. Probably should have established them before I hopped in the shower."

"Ground rules? What, you are too good to bathe with others?"

"No. I used to bathe with my brother when I was younger quite a bit, and now I take baths with Spike all the time," I said, taking a few deep breaths to calm myself down. "However, I don't know you, and I don't much like being seen naked!"

"Wait, what?" she asked, confusion plain as day on her face. "I do not understand."

I sighed and motioned to myself. "I don't wear these clothes just because I look fantastic in them," I said, reaching down to adjust my top a little around the base of my neck. "I'm very self-conscious about being naked."

She let that process for a moment before she spoke up. "Oh. Why are you self-conscious about it?"

"I don't want to talk about it, alright? Look, I know lots of ponies do that whole group bathing thing," I said, waving it off. "But that's not something I do. I tend to freak out when ponies see me naked."

"Alright...okay," she said, sitting down and clearing her throat. "I am sorry then, if that helps. I did not know."

"Yeah, I know you didn't know," I muttered, sitting down and rubbing the back of my head. "I'm sorry for flipping out on you like that. I just-I'm really sensitive about it, okay? So I bathe alone, and I'd prefer if you don't sneak up on me like that. I almost blasted you as hard as I could!"

She nodded a few times. "Alright, fine. I will try to keep that in mind. Still...showers must be lonely for you then, huh?"

I shrugged and walked over to re-assemble my pistol, sitting on the edge of my bed. "Not really. Group bathing isn't something I grew up doing on a larger scale, so it's hard to miss what you've never had."

"You say that, but you would think otherwise were you to have five or six ponies in a large wooden tub with you," she said, sitting down with her own disassembled parts. "I like the public baths. Good chance to talk with others, get to know new ponies, that sort of thing."

"Yeah, and I'm sure being able to get touchy-feely with new mares is just a convenient bonus, right?" I snarked, grinning even as my eyes remained focused on my work.

Truth be told, group bathing wasn't uncommon. Given that the vast majority of ponies are at the very least partial nudists their entire lives, it's not so strange to consider that a lot of us bathe together. Pretty much every city has public baths for all ponies to gather together and wash up with each other. It's a very social activity that I've never taken part in to this day. After all, I have a secret to keep. Just because the option's available doesn't mean that everypony does it.

"Hey, if they want to throw themselves at me and ask if they can help wash my back, who am I to say no?" she said with a smile, looking off to the side. "They usually wait until we are out of the baths before they try to make a pass at me."

I just rolled my eyes at that. "Suuuure...whatever you say."

After we were finished with our work, we had about an hour left before we needed to get down to business. We went and got something small and simple to eat after I re-donned my disguise and changed my clothes to something less Twilight Sparkle and more 'casual commoner walking down the street'. Sweatpants and a non-descript shirt, in case that wasn't clear.

In case you're confused, I did not trust her. Not as much as I was pretending to be, anyways. I was under no illusions about the facade she was putting on, though I questioned how much of it was a facade and how much of it was simply how she was. She was very ponyvillean like that, except instead of her heart it was her desires she wore on her sleeve. She would've fit in well in Ponyville, if it weren't for her constant attempts to get under ponies' tails. Then again, I'm sure there were plenty of ponies in Ponyville that followed her thought process, or at least were malleable towards it.

While we ate, I learned a little more about her foalhood. The pseudo-orphanage she grew up in was a decently-sized old apartment building that an old mare named Vanilla Cream took over. She converted the rooms, furnished them as best she could, and started taking in fillies and colts that needed a home. Only catch was that she didn't speak fluent Equestrian, only Gradios and a small amount of Equestrian. My best guess was that she was once a baker, but she'd given up her profession.

Gadget was apparently abandoned there as a foal, and the old mare took her in. I didn't get many details, but I didn't need much beyond that, and by the time we got to that point, we were running five minutes behind my schedule. She didn't know that, but I did, and that sort of thing tends to really bug me. I can usually let it go, but at the time, this sort of thing needed to go off without a hitch.

I rushed her into showing me where we needed to go. Fortunately, she knew a way into the back entrance, and without a magic detection system in place, that meant that thorough use of my telekinesis was more than viable. I had no intention of using offensive spells unless absolutely necessary, for fear of unnecessary casualties. I did, however, have a bit of mind magic I needed to put to use before we moved in.

We ducked around behind a building, and I had Gadget keep watch while I closed my eyes and lit my horn, going through the familiar motions of a very special form of mind magic I'd used on myself countless times. Ponykind had left a lot of their senses to fade away in favor of higher intelligence than your average animal, and while one's brain wasn't tuned to allow for it...they were still there, to some extent. Waiting to be honed and focused in on.

It had taken me years to get it to a point where it wouldn't potentially kill me when I used it. The after-effects can be draining, but they're nothing compared to the time when I did it wrong and went completely blind for a full five minutes. You have no idea how much I was panicking when I did that to myself, but to avoid anyone asking questions, I kept myself quiet and locked in my lab until it thankfully wore off.

It did have limits, of course. You can only fine-tune something so much before you reach a limit, and our senses are certainly limited. While I had the tweaks and adjustments established in my head well enough that it was like flipping a switch in my brain, there was only so far I could push it without actually altering, say, my olfactory glands...which, might I note, is impossible outside of body modification. I think I've already explained the dangers of that form of magic well enough.

Of course, there is enough of an advantage in working with what I've already got. Imagine, if you would, the ability to smell something five rooms away. The chrome metal on a vacuum cleaner, or what your neighbor three houses down is cooking for dinner. That's well within what a pony is capable of, and even without magic there have been documented cases of such things. I was just cheating, I guess you could say.

I did at one point consider acclimating to keeping my senses heightened at all times, but then I got Spike. I tried enhancing my senses around him when he was a baby, and never did it again because a single inhale of the stench coming from his diaper instantly made me vomit. Just, my entire being screamed in revulsion and tried to expel all the things from my stomach. It succeeded.

These adjustments gave me particularly keen hearing, and a sharp sense of smell. You can probably imagine just how useful that is when you're trying to remain undetected while sneaking into hostile territory. Being able to hear a security guard down the hall without having to peek your head out, being able to smell them down below...I had to practice a lot with my sense of smell to really get used to how it worked. It's really difficult to describe what it's like to learn to differentiate from a smell that's close, and a smell that's from further away, smells that a normal pony would never pick up on to begin with.

I mean I still smell really unpleasant things, I can't exactly avoid that, but no one ever said the kind of work I did was pretty.

With little fanfare, I flipped those switches in my head, carefully letting things build up while taking in a few shallow breaths through my nostrils. Immediately, my nose was assaulted by intense scents from the nearby trash bins, but I kept the bile in my throat down long enough to take a few more lungfuls of air. I couldn't comprehend how dogs put up with being able to smell things like this, or at least I assumed this was similar, but then they were born this way. I was sure it was just natural to them.

Alongside that, I partially lowered my ears to dull the echoes of noise filtering into my range of hearing. While our ears are far more limited than what our noses are capable of, I deemed it extremely useful in assisting my enhanced sense of smell to detect targets without actually being able to see them. It was sort of like a second point of reference to help me figure things out. However, when just turning it on...you really don't want to be somewhere loud, like anywhere near a busy main street during the day. I learned that lesson the hard way. Thought my ear drums were going to explode and take chunks of my head along with them....

There is a certain amount of time needed to acclimate to the changes in my head, time needed to help the more specific aspects of these changes to settle in, such as being able to talk to someone right next to me without them sounding like they were talking to me with a megaphone directly against my ears. I was only fortunate that Gadget kept her mouth shut long enough for me to put the finishing touches on it. With the way she'd been running her mouth and teasing me earlier, I wouldn't have been surprised if she'd tried to get my attention in some way.

"What was that about?" she asked, once I'd opened my eyes and slowly gotten to my hooves once more.

"Nothing important, just focusing myself," I semi-lied. "My mentor's lessons in meditation help me to calm my nerves and put distracting thoughts off to the wayside temporarily."

"Sounds useful. How is that going to help us?"

"If I'm focused, I can distinguish sounds better, smell things I normally wouldn't pay any mind to..." I listed off, shrugging and reaching down to pat the pistol I had tucked into the waistband of my sweatpants, the strings pulled tight and tied together to make sure they didn't loosen up on me. "More useful than you think."

"...Da, that sounds like it would be useful," she said, pulling her Makarov out and giving it a quick once-over. "So, how are we doing this?"

"We're sneaking in through the back entrance to the downstairs kitchen. Unless you think there's an entrance on the second floor we could use that'd be more discreet?" I asked, walking with her down the street, close enough to see the building from a block away.

She shook her head. "There is a balcony to one of the second-floor suites you can see from out back, but unless you have a way of getting up there-"

"I can teleport us. Not a problem since there isn't a magic detection system in place."

"Wait, really? You can teleport?" she asked in disbelief.

"Yes, as long as I have a good mental map of where I want to teleport to and it's within range of my magic, I can do it. I can take you with me too," I said, shrugging a little. "Though, a blind teleport comes with inherent risks...such as teleporting into a chunk of rubble that wasn't in that spot last time you checked."

"That sounds like it would be bad."

"Imagine your internal organs and a chunk of ceiling trying to occupy the same space at the same time."

"...I do not want to imagine that, no."

"Mmmhmm."

"That is all well and good, but...how are we going to sneak in when I do not have a quiet gun like yours?" she asked, holding up her pistol.

I shook my head. "I don't intend to go in there bullets flying. I'd like to avoid confrontation if I can, but if I can't, well...that's what you're here for."

Gadget just snorted in amusement. "What, as a meat shield?"

"No, as back-up!" I said in exasperation. "I wouldn't do that to you."

"Suuuure," she muttered, tucking her pistol away. "Whatever. So we are just using magic?"

"I'm going to be using magic to put them to sleep before they can make any noise, and you're going to be staying behind me," I explained, motioning for her to show me the way around behind the building. "If they get shots off, our cover's blown and we'll both need to go full-force on this."

"Just the two of us against an entire security team?"

"You forget that I'm an extremely skilled mage," I said, reaching up to tap the side of my horn. "I can deflect incoming gunfire to some extent, and I highly doubt that she can afford nullstone bullets."

"That would be correct...so what, I do nothing unless everything goes straight to Tartarus?"

"Pretty much. I'm used to doing this sort of thing on my own," I said, slowing down as we drew closer to our destination. "You can...you can be sneaky and precise, right?"

"This is not the first time I have done something like this," she said, motioning for me to follow as we turned into an alleyway. "I can be subtle."

"Good. If everything goes to plan, we won't even need to put up a proper fight."

Why did I even say that? How fucking stupid could I be? Though, in my defense, I didn't like the idea of being in a contained area, fighting an ex-Armada pegasus. I had no doubt that if I were forced to engage her in hoof-to-hoof combat, I'd lose, even worse if she still had her Royal Guard weaponry. Plus, she was a pegasus...and they're nothing if not slippery.

Plus, while I doubted she had nullstone weaponry of any sort, that stuff's military-grade and heavily restricted in use, there was always the possibility of the opposite being true when it came to the unknown. I knew very little about her operation, nor did I know anything about her actual finances or connections. I couldn't afford to be careless, even if I had to go full-force in this matter. An explosive magic show wouldn't do either, and I wanted to avoid us being discovered if I could. You can imagine a building blowing up in several places and catching fire attracts attention, the kind of attention I really don't want. Last thing I need is the business I'm trying to take over being discovered by the local police, let alone me being caught with my hoof in the proverbial cookie jar.

Our approach went unnoticed, and I couldn't hear any wings in the air. We hung back in an alleyway while we got a good look at what we were dealing with. The entire setup was amateur-hour as far as I was concerned. There was no line-of-sight to the back entrance from inside of the building, each of the guards forced to stand around the door with only the dim light of a nearby lamp post to illuminate them. No windows for anyone to observe them from properly, not even a security camera...you may as well raise your proverbial tail and invite a pony like me inside without even the smallest fuss!

I pulled my pistol out and gave it a once-over in the dark, my horn barely acting as good enough illumination. I didn't want to be spotted by them, obviously.

"They have security cameras on the inside, right?" I asked, pulling my silencer out of one of the pockets of my sweatpants, carefully screwing it onto the end of my pistol.

"Da," she whispered, clearing her throat as quietly as possible. "Security room is on the first floor."

"Then we'll be splitting up. I'll teleport you up to the second floor balcony you mentioned, then I'll infiltrate from downstairs," I said, quirking a brow. "You're not easily nauseated, are you?"

"Нет, I will be fine. Uh..." she whispered, pausing for a moment. "What does infiltrate mean?"

"It means that I'll sneak in through the back door. Meanwhile, you'll wait for me on the balcony, I'll make my way to you," I continued. "You wait in the room the balcony's connected to, if no one's inside. If you start to hear a ruckus or loud gunfire, wait thirty seconds for them all to come after me, then slip out of the room and flank them from behind."

"Очень хорошо! This is more planned out than most of the other times I have taken part in this kind of thing," she said, grinning a little. "Alright, Canterlot. Show me how good you are with that gun."

I rolled my eyes at that and simply focused on taking aim. The distance was significant, but not so much that it would mess with my aim. There were three of them, two at the door, both unicorns, and one earth pony off to the side, having a smoke. All three had dark blue suits on, and I was willing to bet that was the security's uniform. I suppose he was on break, I couldn't see any other reason for him to be out there with those two other guards. Considering the size of the place, security on the outside was very lax...probably because they'd never actually been attacked before.

I rose up onto my hindlegs and spread my stance a little, gripping the gun with both of my hooves to steady my aim. All three of them needed to go down quick, preferably without making too much noise. I aimed for their heads first, quickly switching between them to get a feel for exactly how far I'd have to shift my aim, then focused my aim on the earth pony.

A quiet 'pff!' sounded off from my pistol, followed by the earth pony letting out a surprised grunt before collapsing to the ground in an awkward fashion, drawing the attention of the two guards. I only had maybe two seconds before they called for help. The unicorn to the left of the door from my position went down next, my second shot striking straight through the base of his horn and into his brain. A quick adjustment to my aim, and the third guard was down for the count as well.

Gadget whistled at the show. "Whoo, very nice, Canterlot! You did not even hesitate."

I rolled my eyes and moved down to all fours again. "I fought an ancient Goddess and came out of it victorious. Honestly, this is more of a return to form in comparison."

"Must be quite a story behind it," she mused, walking ahead of me towards the building. "We will have to survive this so you can tell me."

"Heh! That won't be difficult."

Our approach was as casual as it could be, though I kept my eyes peeled and my ears perked up, taking in every sound in the area. While security looked lax, knowing my luck, she had ponies waiting nearby to report in instead of relying on security cameras.

This didn't turn out to be the case as we approached the back door, the noises from inside muted in comparison to the resounding dull roar of wind all around us. I wouldn't be able to get an accurate feel for what was on the other side of that door until I actually went in.

"Show me where the balcony is."

Gadget just pointed off to the left of the door, up to the second floor. It wasn't a particularly large balcony, but it was enough room for me to get her up there without a problem. Only catch was that there were windows up there, and her re-appearing might be spotted by anyone inside of the room.

"Whose room is that, exactly? Ruby's bedroom?" I asked, dubious on sending her up there without any precaution.

"Da, but she only sleeps in there, and it is not that late," she explained, pulling out her pistol and looking it over. "She should be in her office right now."

"No one else that should be in there?"

"нет, there should be no one."

"Alright...then fair warning, teleportation can be very nauseating for some ponies, especially if they've just eaten," I said, already doing the math to precisely teleport Gadget from here to that balcony. "Make sure to brace yourself, and when you're ready, tell me. It'll be over in a flash."

She gave me a quick nod and took a few deep breaths, her eyes drifting shut while she tried to brace herself for something she had zero experience with. The moment she said she was ready, I gave her to the count of three...and teleported her on one. I found that it was easier to teleport them before they were expecting it, because lots of ponies second-guess themselves near the end of the countdown. Best to do it when she's firmly situated her mind for it.

The flash of magic next to me was quickly punctuated by the semi-noisy burst of magic up on the balcony, and I saw Gadget re-appear up there just barely, the lights doing nothing to highlight her form. The way she was hanging her head and struggling not to retch, however, told me that...she'd handled it better than most. The vast majority of ponies going through their first teleportation usually wind up vomiting all over the ground.

That was part of my reasoning in having her wait for me on the second floor, outside of it being the best laid plan given she didn't have a properly silenced weapon. Nausea and an urge to puke doesn't do good things for your ability to keep a steady aim. I don't know about you, but when I puke, I have very shaky limbs for a time, not to mention how distracting that nauseating churning sensation in my gut is.

Of course, separating from her gave her ample time to set up an ambush with her boss, but I had the sensory advantage. If there was a significant shift in the security detail after her arrival on the scene, I'd know just who she was actually betraying here.

With Gadget in position, and hopefully undetected after that fairly bright light show my teleportation gave off, I pressed myself against the side of the building just next to the back door, and used my magic to move the bodies into a pile behind me. Under normal circumstances I would've given them the double-tap, as any trained assassin would do, but I was running on thirty-three bullets total after putting a few through their heads. I had to be conservative until shit hit the fan, if that ever came about.

I took a deep breath to prepare myself, and exhaled slowly while reaching for the doorknob, my gun being held in my other hoof. Magic detection system or not, a glowing horn and a gun held in a bright glowy aura doesn't do well for someone trying to be sneaky. Tends to really stick out, especially at night or in low-light conditions. I may have impressive magic, but there's reasons I learned how to be very precise with my hooves and not just with my telekinesis.

I turned the knob and pushed the door open slowly, just a smidge, leaning over to peek inside. No one there. Good, that helped me out a lot. I ducked my head in and checked my corners quickly, especially behind the door, then calmly slipped inside and reached back to turn the knob and close the door, slowly letting the knob rotate back into its natural position so it didn't make a loud clicking noise.

This wasn't like with Charlatan Muse. This wasn't the kind of killing I could sit back and enjoy. This was the kind of killing where my more practical skills came into use, the kind of killing where I needed to be quiet, quick, and precise above all else.

The short hallway in front of me had a few boxes stacked on both sides, the tops open enough to show what they had inside. There were more ammo drums than I could count! What did she plan on doing with these? The crowbars they used to crack those crates open were propped against the wall next to those boxes. Maybe this was a shipment they stole?

I didn't have time to really put a lot of thought into it, So I made a mental note of the very minor discovery. My only regret was that I had no way of carrying a few of them. All I had was my pockets, and the three spare magazines for my pistol tucked in my left pocket. I'd stuffed tissue between them so they didn't clack against each other, so at least I didn't have to worry about that.

This sort of thing wasn't like in the movies. You couldn't sneak up on someone quiet as the air with a heavy machine gun on your back and a bandolier of ammunition slung over your withers. I couldn't somehow carry around enough ammunition even for just my pistol to hold off an entire squad of hostiles without some serious trigger discipline. It was necessary to travel light to be stealthy in any way, shape or form. A little spell to cushion your hoofsteps helps too. Seriously, ponies are not built to be sneaky.

I moved to the end of the hallway and rose up onto my hindlegs, pressing my side against the wall and closing my eyes. I focused on my hearing, taking slow, deep breaths to draw in the scents permeating the area. I had to suppress the urge to snort when I picked up the smell of someone using the bathroom a few doors down. Just an unfortunate hazard. On the flip-side, that combined with my hearing let me pick up on at least two ponies in the room opposite the bathroom, though where they were in that room, I couldn't be sure. There were at least three patrolling the main hallway, and a lot of clinks and clatters from further down could be heard. The room those noises were coming from was too far away for me to pick up on how many were in there, but judging by the noises...I was betting it was a kitchen.

I peeked around the corner just a little and realized very quickly that this place must've been a renovated office building. All of these rooms on the first floor, small in size and with tall windows next to the doors, reminded me of the tiny offices you'd see bank managers or supervisors working in, or something to that effect. It only took me a second to look down the hall, and I could see a tall earth pony walking away from me, his back turned. Every single room had the same entrance.

On one hoof, that was great. General uniformity in the building's design made it easy for me to keep track of things and make a mental map as I moved through it. On the other hoof, those tall windows would make it very easy to spot me moving past, and given that the guard I saw was Stalliongradi, and the three outside were also Stalliongradi, and they all seemed to wear dark blue suits, my shorter stature and casual clothes were worthy of plenty suspicion. You know, aside from the obvious gun in my hoof. With a silencer on it.

It was a shame I wasn't still a little filly. There was a decently-sized air duct in the wall across from me, but there was no way I was going to fit in it.

I couldn't keep my head poked out for too long. It wasn't like they wouldn't be able to see me even if they were all the way down the hall. There were overhead lights, and they were all turned on at the moment. Shooting them out wasn't an option, the noise of the ricocheting bullet would make them wary, and plus, that would be a massive waste of my already limited ammunition.

There was a room on the other side of the wall I was leaning against. I could use that. I just needed to be careful. I risked one last peek around the corner, and identified the exact position of the doorknob and the distance from me, and ducked back behind my cover. I could cover that range with a silencing spell, easy.

"Hey, Breaker. We're heading out for a bit. Want us to bring anything back?"

My ears perked up higher and I closed my eyes once again, focusing on my hearing to get a better 'view' of the three ponies walking the hall. They had stopped in a cluster near each other at the other end of the hall.

"Yeah, sure. Just bring me back a sub, I'm hungry."

I cursed under my breath and froze in place, glancing back out of the corner of my eye at the door I'd entered at. I didn't know if they'd be heading out the back or not...but it was certainly closer than the front entrance, at least. If they came out through here...I had to retreat before they came this way.

I moved for the door and slowly turned the knob, slipping back out into the cold and shutting the door behind myself, just as quietly as when I'd entered. I ducked out of the dim light and hid myself behind the small pile of bodies I'd placed just barely out of sight, and waited. Sure enough, they both came out a few seconds later. They were immediately confused by the lack of guards outside, and I wasted no time in taking aim.

Two shots, two more dead ponies to add to the pile. Thirty one. Quite fortuitous for me, since that meant that there was only one guard walking around that hall in there. I moved them back onto the pile after rifling through their pockets. They weren't packing anything big, no tommyguns, not even leg-mounted weaponry. Just pistols. However, the kind of guns they were using didn't match up with mine, so that meant I didn't get to have any extra ammunition. Slightly disappointing.

No, I didn't take their money. Yes, they had money on them. What do you take me for, some common street thief?

I slipped back inside and took up my previous position, taking a moment to re-evaluate the situation ahead of me. You'd be surprised how quickly the situation can change if you turn your attention away for even a moment. Kinda like that old excuse babysitters use when the foal they're watching is suddenly screaming because he managed to drop a vase on his own head while she was going to the bathroom.

Fortunately, everything was right where it should've been, though he was still patrolling the hallway. I didn't have a good angle to see if anyone was watching him, but he seemed to be lingering near the only door that didn't have a tall window next to it, right next to another open hallway that likely led to the areas in the front of the building. Could've been a broom closet, could've been the security room I needed to track down. Either way, I needed to check it out...which meant, I needed to get rid of him.

You may be wondering why I didn't bother with my mind magic, considering I'd used it in previous instances to hide who I really was. The reason is, these ponies are far more attentive than a large group of ponies in a bar, or some dance club. While I could certainly do it, there had to be more than a few unicorns in the area that would pick up on it after a while. Out in public, among larger crowds, ambient magic tends to blend together and get ignored. Here, my magic would begin to stand out the longer I maintain it, and I prefer to not risk detection in any way, if I can help it.

It was irritating, but I had to be patient and find a way around him. This was where most amateurs fucked it up. Jump out, fire willy-nilly, make tons of noise as bullets miss their mark and hit the walls, maybe the glass nearby...stuff like that. Every scenario I had involved a risk, and I had to choose which was the lesser evil.

Killing him from where I was wasn't an option. I couldn't see any security cameras from where I was, but there could've been one around the corner in the hallway that I couldn't see from here. If I tried to get his attention, he might get those guys in that security room, or some other room, to check things out with him. In a worst-case scenario, if he became too suspicious, he might alert the entire building, and then I'm just kinda fucked.

I had no intention of fighting all of them, which was why I wanted that security room under my control. I couldn't just slip out the back and go upstairs and leave it be. I took a deep breath and knocked firmly on the wall, waiting to see what he would do. I didn't see a radio hanging on his hip, but he could've had it hidden in his suit somewhere....

Fortunately for me, he was more the curious sort than the cautious. It only took a few moments before he began moving towards the source of the noise, and I took the chance to step back and duck behind the crates. It wasn't much in the way of cover, but it'd do. I took aim directly at the corner, and waited for him to make the turn.

The moment he appeared, I pulled the trigger and reached out with my magic at the same time. A spray of red ejected through the other side of his head along with my bullet, and I cringed at the indentation it made in the wall. The angle was slightly upward thanks to him being taller, so it didn't hit anywhere too obvious, but anyone with a good enough eye would spot it.

I caught him in my magic before he could crumple like the sack of dying meat he already was, hefting the Stalliongradi just a few inches off the ground and whisking him away, closer to me. There was nothing I could do about the blood splatter, which was one reason I didn't always try to kill everyone I came across, but I knew almost nothing about Ruby Red other than the fact that she was a pegasus. In the off chance that I didn't put her down with a single well-placed shot in an ambush, I had to be sure I didn't get an entire security team bearing down on me. If that happened, I'd have no choice but to retreat, if I even could.

Speaking of pegasi...I just came to an odd realization: none of the ponies I'd seen thus far had been pegasi. All of them were either earth ponies or unicorns. As I laid him down behind the box I'd taken cover behind, I made a mental note to double-check that observation as I made my way through the rest of the floor.

I lowered my head and lit my magic as I twitched my ears this way and that, focusing in on the ponies in the rooms. There weren't many, and as I passed by, I swiftly pulled the doors open and fired sleeping spells at them. I made sure to catch each one before they fell so they didn't make any noise, and just as I thought, no pegasi. Not a single one of them. What was the purpose behind that? Maybe she had something against her own tribe?

Sleeping spells would be so much more efficient and safe if mind magic were legal. The difference is trivial in the casting of the spell, but the way a sleeping spell based in mind magic puts a target to sleep compared to the accepted standard is far faster. Directly forcing the mind into an REM state instead of causing the body to produce a heavy flood of endorphins that results in a pony passing out into blissful slumber, almost akin to an opiate-induced black-out? Let's just say the latter one can actually take a few seconds to kick in, whereas the former drops them as quickly as those ponies I shot in the head.

I took the time to check each room, just short of that first hallway. Every step deeper into the building I took was measured, quiet and careful as I ducked into each of those smaller side-rooms and made sure my spell did what was expected of it. Some of them seemed to be civilians, staff members, ponies that I couldn't verify had anything to do with her operation. They didn't deserve a bullet to the head. Well, save for that one security guard that was already napping in a chair in one of the rooms, of course. I shot him in the head and set him down on top of his dead co-worker by the ammo drum crate.

I mean, I guess none of them could've been involved in Ruby's activities and they were just responsible for watching the place, but....they were in the way. Besides, if it were that easy to make me bend to the will of my conscience, I probably would've been dead a long time ago.

When I reached the hallway, I stopped short and took a deep breath, focusing once more on my hearing. A security camera generally didn't make much noise, but the small motor they had to let the camera swivel back and forth to cover a larger area could be heard well enough with my enhanced senses. Sure enough, after just a few seconds, I heard that tell-tale whirr.

Now, this was where things got risky. I had no way of seeing around that corner without possibly being spotted by the camera in the process. If I was correct, the security room was just across the hall. If that camera caught sight of me, and security noticed...well, things might get really loud, really fast. That would be really bad no matter what way you look at it.

With a deep inhale and a moment taken to make sure I had good footing, I ducked low and waited for the camera to finish turning. The moment the motor fell silent, I peeked around the corner...and everything went to shit. Fuck me sideways with a barbed-wire bat.

I had the terrible misfortune of losing that unannounced coin toss. There was a fifty-fifty chance that, when the motor stopped, the camera would either be looking directly at me, or it would be turned towards what appeared to be a narrow stairwell leading downstairs into the basement. Almost immediately, I heard a commotion from the very room I was looking to take without being detected, and then the door burst open with two earth ponies rushing out with tommyguns pointed right at me.

I felt the world freeze in a moment of genuine terror, just before my magic flashed to life and I threw up a shield. I felt the impact of their bullets as they cut loose on me, but my barrier held strong long enough for me to shake it off and let the adrenaline take hold. I took aim at them and popped two rounds off into their heads, then threw their bodies back into the security room and slammed the door shut.

There was no way that those gunshots weren't heard by anyone else. Already, I could hear chatter and commotion all around me, upstairs and down the stairwell to my right. I had to act fast. I eyed their tommyguns and snatched both of them up, giving them a rapid once-over before reaching out back down the hall where I'd come from. I grabbed the entire crate of ammo drums and pulled it over to me just as hoofsteps began to sound off from every viable direction.

They were coming for me.

What, you thought I was gonna be a total badass and pull this off super-clean? Sadly, 'being a badass' isn't how things always go. From an outside perspective, what I was doing at that moment, standing my ground, was plenty badass as-is, but it sure didn't feel like it from where I was standing. I was scared, I was vulnerable, and outside of an almost-complete stranger, I was alone and surrounded. I could have teleported, but how many street ponies do you know that can teleport? Oh, none? Yeah, exactly. I may as well have raised a flag that said 'Hi, my name is Twilight Sparkle' while I was at it, if I'd done that.

I could hear the hoofsteps above me, and I felt the familiar rush of panic. There were at least five coming my way, and more waiting upstairs for confirmation of the situation. Two downstairs, with five more lingering behind them. The hallway the camera was in? I could see a pony peeking around the corner through the glass door that separated this section from theirs. They had a clear line of sight to me. I didn't hesitate to take aim with my pistol and fire a covering shot for myself, ducking to my right and hiding behind the wall again.

It only bought me a moment's time, and I was down to twenty-seven bullets for my pistol. Fortunately, that wasn't much of an issue anymore. The advantage of stealth had been lost, but on the flip-side, the disadvantage of having to hold myself back had also been cast aside. While I would make a distinct attempt to spare staff that didn't try to put a bullet in me, I now had carte blanche.

Welp. So much for doin' this the easy and less noisy way.

Author's Note

Well! That was interesting. Shame it all fell apart for her, huh?

As always, like comment and subscri-wait, this isn't YouTube. Nevermind that! Just comment, and like if you think the story deserves it. :raritywink:

Chapter 20 - Hostile Takeover

written by Fire Soul

I only had a few seconds before the bullets would begin to fly. I eyed the two tommyguns I had held in my magic, aiming one at the basement stairwell and one down the hall directly across from me. I saw the doors on the far end flip open, followed by a shriek from what appeared to be a cook.

"Get back in there!!" I shouted at her, waving my gun in her direction.

She took the hint, just as a burst of gunfire came at me from my right. I heard a bullet nick the tommygun I had aimed in that direction, and with a quick readjustment of my aim, I pulled the trigger. The sound of glass shattering and the shouts of several ponies down that hall announced the danger that was approaching me, but I could barely hear them over the ringing in my ears.

I looked down the hall across from me just in time to see a pony rushing down the stairs, a modded shotgun held in his hoof, an earth pony. He had an extra grip grafted onto the gun, and the trigger was moved forward so he could hold it easier with one hoof. Shame he didn't get to fire it.

I pulled the trigger on the tommygun I had aimed down that hall and watched as a hail of bullets tore up the wall next to him, then tore into him. His eyes were wide and his gun went flying out of his hoof as several stray bullets hit it, the metallic clatter only making the ringing in my ears even worse alongside the sound of gunfire. He collapsed and tumbled down the stairs, a pitiful and throaty groan the only thing heard from him before he fell still and silent.

My enhanced senses weren't perfect. I could hear better, but that's a double-edged sword where gunfire's involved. Gunfire is loud enough without your hearing being so sensitive that you can hear a pin drop on a carpet. I needed to find a chance to turn it off, but with my attention being divided between two different directions, that chance wasn't going to come easily. I needed a good distraction.

The strategy I used against Nightmare Moon seemed like a good idea.

I quickly backed up and pulled my tommyguns back towards myself, my magic grabbing hold of the ammo crate and pulling it into place in front of myself, acting as a makeshift barricade for any incoming gunfire. I was about as ready as I could be, so I lit my horn up and crafted two compact, but potent balls of pure white light. I sent one down both halls, then ducked down and covered my eyes with one of my forelegs while flattening my ears against my skull.

Just before they went off, I focused my magic and braced myself as I flipped the switch on my hearing once more. Instantly, a feeling of vertigo and being off-balance hit me like a train, and I had to take deep and calming breaths to fight off the urge to vomit. Everything sounded muted and dulled, and I knew it wasn't because of the flashbang spells I'd just cast. Did I mention my enhanced senses weren't perfect?

All of my tests made it clear that such extreme shifts in one's senses will have drawbacks, though those drawbacks are far more extreme when you're going from enhanced senses to a lesser, more natural level. Try as I might, I never could work out the drawbacks and find a way to negate them. All I could do was minimize them as much as possible.

Thankfully the loud and blinding flash hadn't gotten to my eyes, so when I felt stable enough, I quickly stood and pushed the crate aside with my magic, taking up my previous position right at the edge of the right hall. I heard a thud around the corner and took a peek, only to hear several more thuds and small cries of pain as a unicorn tumbled down the basement stairs. Guess he must've been in the middle of coming up after me when I set that flashbang off. I took the chance to aim one of my tommyguns down the stairs and pepper him with bullets.

I was still fairly dizzy, and I'm sure my aim was garbage, but when you have a nice big crate of spare ammunition at your side, you don't have to worry so much about being conservative. Instead, I held the trigger down and sprayed bullets down the hall, doing the same to the one across from me, until the cartridges ran out. Unlike the ammo drums in the crate, the guards only had the normal cartridges in them. Time to really make these guns scream.

I snatched up a few drums and dropped them next to myself while floating two into the air, pulling my tommyguns back behind cover as several bullets were fired in my direction. It sounded like they only had pistols, down the right hall. The ponies in the stairwell at the end of the hall across from me were being far more cautious.

I was in a very bad position. While I had clear line of sight to that stairwell at the end of the opposite hall, I had no line of sight at all to the one just around the corner, and I had targets approaching from both directions. If the guards in the stairwell opposite me managed to pin me down, or get any shots off, I wouldn't have time to check on the right hallway. That would leave me way too close to some of them for my own comfort. All I could do without taking the risk of giving up my ground was to hunker down and move the box to a more strategic position next to me, so I'd have something I could safely duck behind if things really went bad for me. As it stood, I was preoccupied randomly spraying bullets down each hall and slamming new ammo drums into the two tommyguns whenever they ran out.

You don't truly know how long thirty seconds are until you've gotten bullets flying past your head, and you know you just need to hold out long enough. You start counting those seconds as if your life depends on it, and believe me, it makes time feel like it's taking ten times as long to tick by. I was burning through ammunition, but considering I had an entire crate of the stuff, I wasn't afraid to use it. I kept my pistol close and limited the use of it. It went from my main method of execution to my last resort, should my position wind up getting compromised.

It felt like it took forever for Gadget to make her move. It was getting to the point that I thought maybe I'd miscounted or she'd actually gone and stabbed me in the back, but a sudden tussle and the slam of several bodies caught my attention, despite the gunfire. I heard two guards shouting in alarm before several gunshots rang out...and then one of the guards got thrown clean down the stairs head-first.

I heard him scream in panic, and I glanced over just in time to see Gadget run down the stairs while he landed on his side at the bottom. She jumped halfway down the stairs and slammed all three of her unoccupied hooves and the entirety of her body weight down on his side, and I was certain that she'd broken him in several different ways. He groaned this terrible, guttural kind of grunt while weakly trying to roll over onto his back, but a quick shot from her pistol splattered his brains all over the floor.

She was smiling again. Grinning, actually. Well, halfway between a smile and a grin. I knew right then and there that it wasn't just a show in the arena. She was like me. She enjoyed the killing. I could respect that, even if her methods needed a little...tact.

She rushed over just as a hail of bullets rained down in my direction, splintering the stone and wallpaper on the corner I was taking cover at. Guess they found some better firepower. She took up the same position on the opposite side, and I took the chance to toss her one of the tommyguns.

"That wasn't thirty seconds!" I shouted at her over a fresh blast of bullets.

"Really, Canterlot?!" she shouted at me while giving me this dirty look. "I just saved your ass!"

"Yeah, but that doesn't mean I can't give you shit for it!" I responded, grinning and peeking around the corner to see where they all were. "I have an idea. Buy me a minute."

"Yeah, sure, got it!" she said, holding the tommygun in her hooves while peeking around the corner. "Не возьметё, сучары!"

I had no idea what she just said, but I assumed it was some kind of taunt, or insult. The sudden rapid emptying of the drum I'd already put in the gun still made my ears ring, but it did at least give me the time I needed to step back and concentrate. That stairwell leading into the basement gave me the perfect opportunity to buy both Gadget and myself plenty of time, but I needed to get the force behind the spell just right. I couldn't just pop this one off and expect it to go well, especially in such close proximity.

Calculations and equations ran through my mind while I evaluated the brief glimpses I'd gotten of the hallway itself, specifically down the stairwell leading to the basement. Everything had to be just right for this. My horn began to glow brighter and brighter as three pulsing balls of raw force built up and floated off of my horn, each one at a differing level of power. Each one had a different purpose, and I needed this to go off without a hitch.

"Gadget, give me covering fire!"

"Got it!"

The hailstorm of bullets from her tommygun sounded off, the gun just barely peeking around the corner, spraying death all over every inch of the hallway. I rose up onto my hindlegs and pressed the butt of the gun against my wither, turned the corner and cut loose as well, but hitting them wasn't my focus. Instead, I glanced down the stairwell, then down the hallway, and got the final calculations of distance I needed. Without hesitation, I sent the three balls of force right where I needed them to go, and ducked back behind cover.

"Get back and cover your muzzle, Gadget!" I shouted out to her, hunkering down and resting a hoof over my snout and clenching my eyes shut.

I waited for her to mimic my actions before setting them off. I sent one directly into the middle of the T-section at the other end of the hallway, then sent the other two down the stairwell, one floating down under or at least close to the bottom of the staircase while the other flew further forward, out of my sight. As soon as I felt they were where they needed to be, I set them off.

My calculations were, thankfully, within the margin of error I'd established for them. All three went off all at once, and a heavy cloud of shattered concrete and debris filled the air as the stairwell collapsed along with a large section of the hallway that was supported by a pillar or two down there. I could hear more of the floor collapsing out from underneath the guards, if their shouts and screams were any indication.

I took the opportunity to grab the ammo crate along with my tommygun and dart across to where Gadget was, doing my best to keep my nose covered by the fur of my foreleg and my eyes squinted enough to keep the thick dust out. It wasn't an ideal solution in regards to minimizing collateral, but there was no way for them to get to us now without taking the long way around. You know, if this whole 'no pegasi' thing applied to all of the guards in the building.

A quick push of my magic got the air circulating around us, and I made the air flow back into the demolished hallway, taking the cloud of dust with it. Couldn't just sit around and wait for it to dissipate, y'know? We had a pony to kill.

"Holy shit, Canterlot...what the fuck was that?" I heard Gadget ask, now that all the noise had died down.

"A spell of my own design. Came up with it after seeing grenades in action," I muttered, giving my pistol a quick once-over before picking up four ammo drums from the crate and stacking them on each other. "Can't exactly create shrapnel from nothing, but raw kinetic force? That's something low-level magic can do, as long as you know what you're doing."

Of course, what I didn't tell her was that doing something like that leaves a really big magic signature behind, which isn't a good thing if you want to hide who you really are. Those explosions left a nice, big mark that said 'Property of Twilight Sparkle' to anyone that got to it before it dissipated enough, and knew what they were looking for. All they'd need after preserving the signature is someone that was exposed to my magic enough to identify who it belongs to.

"Keep them busy here," I told her, stepping back to put some distance between myself and the collapsed hallway. "Anyone grows balls big enough to warrant trying to make the jump, you neuter 'em."

"You going to fight Ruby by yourself?" she asked, glancing back at me.

"Against my better judgment, yeah."

"Well, good luck with that," she muttered, frowning at me. "I will be up to help you if I can."

"You say that like I'd need your help to deal with a single pegasus," I responded, holding up my tommygun. "Have a little faith in me."

I turned and took off running, the four ammo drums I'd stacked being held together by my magic as they floated through the air. It was dangerous to take her on one-on-one, but it was even more dangerous to leave my flank open to an unwanted surprise. I had two tasks: clear the entire upstairs area, and then deal with Ruby if she didn't already make a run for it. Honestly, she'd be pretty stupid or far too overly confident in her security if she didn't leave.

I wasn't counting on having cover, so I had a barrier up before I'd even reached the top of the staircase. Good thing too, since the moment I poked my head up a few inches past the floor, someone took a few shots at me. I'd taken the time to pick up that interesting modded shotgun that one guard had before I filled him full of holes, and I took aim with it and fired on one of the guards that hadn't gone running downstairs. I suppose the loud and rumbling collapse of a section of the building was enough to get them off their flanks.

Maintaining the barrier was taxing, while under fire. It takes a certain level of focus, and the repeated impact of high-velocity metal on it was akin to getting your ears flicked while you're trying to do a math equation entirely in your head. More of an irritant than you think, in other words. Dangerous too, particularly when they have rapid-fire weapons like, say, the tommygun I had that was currently pouring a storm of lead down the hallway, shredding three guards that were stupid enough not to duck into one of the side rooms. All of those bullets hitting your shield at such a rapid rate? You better hope you find cover fast, you'll burn through your reserves trying to maintain it lightning-quick.

I rushed down the hall, firing upon anyone that dared to peek their head out of the rooms. I didn't have time to be choosy, and I'm sure that by the time I made it to the opposite end, I'd probably at the very least tagged a few staff members, if not outright killed them. Unfortunate, but what can you do?

With them dealt with, I scanned the hallway more thoroughly, and identified one of the only doors that hadn't been opened to let one of the ill-fated guards out. It seemed just as non-descript as the others, but it lacked glass on the side and seemed much more private. I wasn't sure if it was what I was looking for, but everything was worthy of investigation. I pressed myself against the wall next to the door, and got another flashbang spell ready.

I had never fought a member of the Armada. All the things I knew about them, I'd only read in books and heard from other members of the Royal Guard. They weren't quite as exclusive as the Wonderbolts, but their specialized training definitely separated them from your average Royal Guard contingent. Unlike the Wonderbolts, they didn't exist mainly to make the Equestrian Air Force look good. They existed to deal with a very specific threat.

As a precaution, I stood stock-still for a moment and tampered with my own head again. This was going to be disorienting.

As soon as I flipped that switch, a high-pitched ringing kicked off in my ears, to the point that I couldn't hear anything else. I felt the same way you do when you're wearing headphones and the volume's at maximum without your knowledge when you hit play. You know, that swelling sensation that makes you panic and yank the headphones off immediately because it feels like your eyes are going to pop out of your sockets? Just imagine feeling that, plus a sharp stinging sound, but no way to get away from it.

That whole 'heightened senses' thing wasn't meant to be turned off and on like it's no big deal. I was really stressing my sense of hearing out right now, and I had to wait for the ringing to go away before I could get over the brief sensation of vertigo it caused. It only took a minute after that for me to acclimate once more.

I could hear her in there. She wasn't moving much, but she was breathing pretty fast. Her heart was racing...and given how those two things combined made her seem very panicked, I had to wonder why she hadn't left already the moment things started going crazy downstairs.

My magic encompassed the door, and with a firm rush of force through my telekinesis, I ripped it off of its hinges and tossed the door into the room before sending the flashbang spell in after it. I quickly ducked away from the doorway and flattened my ears against my skull, covering my eyes and my ears with my forelegs in hopes of mitigating the damage the spell would do to me.

I could only be thankful it worked. I was anticipating her ability to block my magic, but she hadn't gotten around to it just yet. Fortunate for me. I heard her scream and fall to the floor, and I took the chance to rush in, my barrier up and my tommygun at the ready. I didn't take the time to check to see how much ammo was left in the shotgun, so I didn't plan on relying on it. Instead, I just took aim with it and fired.

What I hadn't seen was that she'd flipped her desk and taken cover behind it. I pulled the trigger on my tommygun, and the rapid-fire noise almost made me miss the strange, low bass-like rumble that began to vibrate the air. I saw something get thrown over from behind the desk, and I knew that it wasn't just some standard grenade.

While it would certainly explode and litter the area with lethal shrapnel, the distinctly-shaped and carved stone covered in a dim red hue was unmistakable. It was one of the Armada's key tools in dealing with rogue mages. While it had similar traits to nullstone, it was far less expensive, rare, and time-consuming to produce, though it was certainly close to being as regulated.

An Armada Shroudstone.

I immediately moved to retreat out of the room. It was only a second after I'd dove out of the room that the stone burst with a high-pitched hum, the resulting explosion barely more than a firecracker, but everything I'd read about them told me that that was deceptive. Every piece of the shroudstone began to emanate that dim red hue in a kind of smoke-like haze, normally barely obscuring one's vision. I was not a normal pony, however. I was a mage. We see the world differently.

Mages like myself see the world the same way everyone else does, but with more additions. We see wisps of accumulated magic in the air, we see the true vibrancy of the magic coming from the horns of other unicorns. We see when they reach out with their telekinesis to grab hold of something. To an untrained pegasus or earth pony, it's invisible. Not to those of us that mire ourselves in that magic, and explore the secrets it holds. It's not something we can just stop seeing.

Unfortunately, against someone trained in the ways of the Armada, this was more a detriment than anything else. I couldn't see a single thing through that thick haze, and if I remember correctly, it wouldn't clear up for hours without some kind of outside influence. I could still hear her though, and she was on the move. The loud crash of glass signaled her escape, and I pushed myself to my hooves and ran through the shroud that was spreading through her office.

My magic faltered the moment I entered the shroud. It was safe to breathe, but my horn was almost throwing a full-on fit! I felt a dull ache build at the base of it, and my grip on the shotgun failed by the time I made it through and rushed over to the window. Just another effect of the shroud. Now do you see what I meant about them being trained to deal with mages like myself?

I didn't have the ability to grab my shotgun from out of the expanding shroud, nor did I have the time or intention of going back to get it with my hooves. I needed to give chase, if she didn't already take to the air and disappear. Then again, I don't think I would've if I were her. Being up in the air is a good way to get shot down with no second chances.

I weaved a quick spell despite the remaining ache in my horn, encompassing myself in it and peeking out the window. It was too dark, and I couldn't see much of anything with the way the office was illuminated. My eyes were too adjusted to the brighter conditions inside the building to make her out anywhere!

I barely heard it before my reflexes kicked in. A loud, explosive boom of a gunshot that made me jerk away from the window just in time to avoid a cluster of shotgun pellets that riddled the rim of the window and gouged chunks out of it. I took a moment to unscrew the silencer from my pistol and stow it in my pocket before taking a few blind shots with it out the window, in the general direction of where I heard those shots come from. Of course I didn't hit anything, but I didn't expect to.

I leapt out of the window and fell to the ground slowly, a good distance away from the building, the glow beneath my body carrying me safely down. Despite this, my hindleg still almost gave out on me, and I came to the realization that I'd pushed my bad leg further than I should've. I'd been doing a whole lot of walking around for long periods of time the last few days, and it was really starting to catch up with me.

I threw up my barrier as soon as another shotgun blast rang out. I heard multiple pellets ping and bounce off of my shield, and I took several more shots in the direction it came from. I unleashed the tommygun liberally, making a smooth sweeping motion in a ninety degree arc in hopes of hitting her, but I heard nothing.

That was when the shrouding began.

It started with a thick, heavy burst along with a hard flap of wings. I immediately adjusted my aim and fired, but she was already out of the way, and that shroud was beginning to encroach upon me at an alarming rate. I had to move. I kept my shield up and bolted to my left, clenching my eyes shut to speed up the transition between a well-lit interior and a darker, semi-moonlit outdoor area.

I heard the shells being loaded into the barrels of a shotgun nearby, and the heavy flap of wings. It didn't sound like her wingspan was anything to scoff at, and that would certainly help her spread that shroud around even better. You may have been under the misconception that the anti-magical properties of the shroud that stone caused were alchemical, but that stone is a product of pegasus ingenuity back when the three tribes were at each other's throats constantly. They found a way to counter our magic so effectively that we learned to fear the flap of wings in the sky. Well, my ancestors, anyway.

I didn't get far. Another blast rang out, and I had to stop to plant my hooves when the pellets hit my shield again. She was behind and above me just a little, if my hearing could be depended upon. I didn't bother turning around, I simply rotated my tommygun and fired. There was a bark of pain, and something dropped to the ground.

"Oh, you little fuckin'-!"

I quickly spun around and fired with my pistol and my tommygun, but my bullets found no purchase. Pegasi are slippery, they are fast, and they have very sharp senses. They need to in order to fly so fast through the air while keeping track of ground targets, the landscape, trees, stuff like that. It's just how their brains function. It was the main reason that I knew, if I wound up fighting her hoof-to-hoof, I would lose.

Another sudden hard flap of what sounded like a single wing sent another plume of that red shroud my way, and I tried to continue to run. However, all I saw when I turned to run was the barrel of what appeared to be a foreleg-mounted double-barreled shotgun pointed right at me. It was very similar in design to the average hoofblade you'd see a Royal Guard using, but it had clearly been modified to her specifications to be a firearm rather than a melee weapon...not that it wouldn't work great as a gauntlet. In true guard fashion, it also functioned as a metal shoe for her hoof. Lucky me.

Another blast of pellets riddled my shield, but I held firm despite my situation. I didn't want to imagine what that shroud would do to my shield, but I was in no rush to find out. I pushed forward and slammed my shield into her, forcing her back a little. She spread one of her wings and gave a hard flap to propel herself backwards, and before I could fire my gun, another plume of her shroud billowed out from her wing and covered my shield.

Immediately, I felt my shield giving way. It was blocking the shroud from reaching me, but I knew that wouldn't last. Even worse, the shroud behind me was covering the area, and rapidly cutting off any means of escape. The building was to my left, and the only way out was to my right. I was like a panicked rat in a maze. There was no time to think about my situation, I just needed to go.

I couldn't afford to lose my tommygun amidst all of this. I held it and the ammo drums close, settling them firmly on my back and darting to my right, determined to get away from her shroud. She was in front of me in seconds. I hadn't heard her reload, I doubt she had time to do so, but I still had to be careful about her pointing that thing at me. A melee weapon I could deal with, but a shotgun was a serious problem if my shield ever broke down on me. I didn't have any cover out here.

My eyes had adjusted well enough, but all I knew about where I was was that I was a short distance away from her office building. We were standing in the street, only a few street lamps illuminating the area around me. I couldn't hear her wings flapping, she was somewhere, probably back in her shroud, hiding from me. I quickly turned and took aim at that growing red mist and unloaded what remained of the current ammo drum in random patterns through it, sending a few ponies down the street running away screaming.

It was only a matter of time before all this racket attracted the attention of the police. I needed to make a serious decision as to whether or not I just ran now or-

She wasn't in the shroud. I knew that the moment I felt my shield fail and saw stars in my vision from the clean sucker-punch to my jaw, my pistol flying out of my hoof and clattering across the street. How the fuck did she sneak up on me?! Perhaps I was a bit more panicked from the shroud than I thought, if I wasn't paying attention that much. Either way, I did manage to stay on my hooves, and reflexively I rose up onto my hindlegs and caught her next swing, pulling her towards me and sending her face-down into the ground.

She twisted and slipped her foreleg out of my grasp before I could break it, and rolled onto her back. I got a good look at the fancy red dress she was wearing, clearly having planned for a night on the town before my arrival. Her lips were a lovely shade of cherry-red, and her mane, despite having been flashbanged, launched through a window and slammed to the ground, was expertly coiffed.

I threw myself on her in hopes of holding her down and pinning her wings, but she saw me coming. Even worse, the reason my shield collapsed became all too apparent mere seconds later as that shroud quickly encompassed us and obscured my vision. I managed to pin her foreleg, but I could no longer see her, and I was right on top of her! I was fighting her blind in that stuff, and no amount of trying to shake it away was making it dissipate.

The impact to my snout made my head snap back, and I cringed in pain. I could taste the blood in my mouth, a nasty mix of salt and copper, and the dull ache in my horn began to return full-force. The world up-ended on me as she flipped me off of her, my back hitting the ground in a roll, and I quickly tried to force myself back up onto my hooves, my tommygun and the ammo drums for it clattering across the pavement, my grip on them completely failing under the influence of Ruby's shroud.

I tried to make a run for it, but she landed on my back and wrapped her forelegs around my neck, forcing me up onto my hindlegs and pulling my head back at an awkward angle, cutting off my air supply. On reflex I tried to grab her with my magic, but all that resulted in was my horn sputtering magic violently and the dull ache at the base of it escalating drastically in intensity. If I could've breathed, I would've groaned in agony.

"Who the fuck are you, huh? Some street mage thinks she can take Ruby Red on?!" she growled in my ear, tightening her grip. "You fucked up, little filly!"

Yeah. Yeah, I did. I really did.

"Gonna hafta get a new dress 'cuz of you! Fuckin' up my evening," she huffed out at me, twisting my head back a little further. "Who ya work for, huh? C'mon, let's hear it!"

I gulped down desperate lungfuls of air as she loosened her grip just a little, my nostrils flaring with every inhale and exhale. I gritted my teeth and tried to blink away all the red in my vision, but there was no way for me to get away from her shroud. She had me for now.

"Gh...th' fuck does it matter?" I rasped out, trying to swallow. "Gonna kill you."

"Hah! That's rich, the unicorn thinks she can take me-"

I didn't bother letting her finish. In a single motion, I moved my bad leg back between her hindlegs and reached back with my forelegs, grabbing hold of her mane and throwing my entire body forward. I used my hip as leverage and tossed her over myself, hoping my grip wouldn't fail me right then and there. I heard her cry out before hitting the ground with a loud grunt, and I made a run for the office building. I had lost my weapons, and she held complete advantage over me. There was no choice but to retreat now.

I needed to get back to Gadget.

Gunfire sounded off behind me as I exited her shroud and ran for the same back door I'd entered from previously. Despite the pain in my horn, I threw a shield up and deflected several bullets before they could hit me. A quick glance back let me see her holding my tommygun in her hooves, a fresh ammo drum loaded into it. Considering those things were hundred-round magazines essentially, she didn't seem to feel any need to be frugal with her ammunition. She had it in one hoof, the butt of it braced against her wither so she could walk and aim more effectively.

It was only then that I noticed one of her wings was broken. Must've been the lucky shot I got off on her earlier.

Unfortunately for me, that was when my bad leg decided that I'd done enough for one day. As I stepped down on it, it caved under the strain, and I stumbled enough in my run for Ruby to close the distance. The rapid impact of that tommygun against my shield threatened to make it collapse, but she ran out of ammunition before I gave up. I managed to put a little distance between the two of us after she ran out, but without all four of my legs to keep me going, it was easy for her to catch up with me once again.

Just in front of the doorway, I heard a firm flap of her wings and felt that shroud crawl over my shield again. I was already worn down and exhausted from struggling to keep it up to begin with, and it fell apart in less than a second. The red haze blinded me once more just as she tackled me to the ground and slammed her armored hoof down on the back of my head, pounding my chin against the pavement.

I tried to force her off by rolling over, but she situated herself perfectly. I got onto my back, but she'd raised up just enough so that my rolling body didn't throw her. All it took was a little adjustment, and she was on top of me again, pinning me down. My forelegs raised up in defense of my face, and I felt that armored hoof come down hard on one of them, the impact almost making it feel like my foreleg had been broken in place of my face.

I had to keep my guard up. This was the worst-case scenario I could think of, short of her reloading her shotgun and blowing my head off in a big chunky spray of equine giblets. Hit after hit rained down on me, and eventually she broke my guard long enough to slam a hoof down on my face and bounce the back of my head off the concrete beneath me. The world spun and everything went black for a moment, my head lilting to the left against the ground while the world around me dulled in sound.

Another hit, and another. I was amazed I was still conscious. I put up at most a feeble attempt to block her strikes, but when you're punch-drunk, you don't really have full motor control. People tend to underestimate just how debilitating that is.

I heard the heavy clomp of hooves coming from...somewhere. A guttural roar, and suddenly the weight was off of me. I rolled to my side and coughed a few times, spitting blood from my muzzle and struggling to get to my hooves. I heard a scuffle behind me, and I turned to look, but there was nothing there that I could see. Just the red shroud. I must've looked like a blind drunk, the way I was stumbling through it to try to catch a glimpse of what was going on.

I caught Gadget's scent in the air, along with Ruby's. A loud cry sounded off from Ruby, followed by one of her wings flapping wildly in the air while the other twitched uselessly. I really must've gotten a good hit in on it earlier, if she couldn't even use it. I couldn't see this of course, but the distinct sounds her wings made were all the 'visual' I needed.

I heard Gadget almost roar out into the air before slamming Ruby down with a bone-crunching thud. The crack of Ruby's skull sounded off along with a sharp, loud cry of agony, followed by a low and keening groan. I heard the stomp of hooves accompanying loud cries from Ruby, and I could only assume that Gadget was trampling her. I drew closer and closer to the source of the sounds, and when things fell quiet, I twitched my ears this way and that trying to detect where they were.

"Canterlot, what is wrong with you? Is it this red mist?" I heard Gadget ask, suddenly next to me.

"You can see it too? Then how'd you see her?" I panted out, blood dribbling from the corner of my muzzle.

"What do you mean? It is just, the air has a strange color to it," she said, taking a step closer to me. "Are you okay?"

"M'fine," I said, though I could hear the nasal tone of my voice. Snout was definitely broken. "Just can't see anything."

"She blinded you?!"

"If I can get out of the shroud, I'll be fine," I clarified, taking a few deep breaths only to choke on some inhaled blood from inside my muzzle. "Where's-?"

I got the answer in the form of a choked gurgle a short distance away. I couldn't see her, but I could hear the stuttering of her breaths, and her slow roll onto her side. I walked slowly and carefully over, but even standing directly next to her, I couldn't see her at all. I could hear her trying to crawl away, albeit very slowly. Gadget must've done quite a number on her.

"You piece of shit traitor!" she rasped out, the metal of her gauntlet scraping at the pavement. "I gave you everything you wanted!"

My ears flattened as several shots of Gadget's pistol rang out. Four in total. I could still hear Ruby's heart beating, but it was slowing down and becoming more and more faint by the second. It occurred to me right then and there that I was pretty much at Gadget's mercy, if she decided to cut-and-run. It wouldn't be hard for her to do...but then, it also seemed like she didn't understand the nature of this shroud outside of how it messed with your magic.

"My horn hurts...sheesh Canterlot, you sure you are alright?" she asked, a hoof touching my wither. "Eyes seem fine, but your muzzle is busted up."

"I'm okay, I promise," I muttered, ducking away and glancing around in vain. "I still can't see. This shroud's going to keep lingering for a while. We need to get back into her office and gather up any papers and documents we can find."

"Why is the shroud a problem? I can see through it just fine."

"Because you're not a mage."

"...Okay?"

"I'll explain later. Cops have to be on their way," I said, pointing in what I thought was still the general direction of the office building. "Get me back in there so we can grab what we need. Then we're leaving."

"Sure, sure. Uh..." she said, tapping my wither. "You need help finding the door?"

"Please."

She guided me inside and away from the shroud in record time, and while my head hurt like a wendigo storm had been set off inside of it, I was mostly okay. Beaten up, battered and bruised thoroughly all in the facial region, but that was no big deal. Wouldn't be the first time. I almost tripped on the tommygun she'd dropped rushing out to help me. I picked it up in my magic and took it with me.

"How'd you know I needed your help?" I asked, rubbing the side of my head while we made our way back upstairs.

"I did not know," she said, shaking her head. "I went upstairs to see what was going on, all I found was an empty room and some red mist. Then I heard gunshots outside and I ran back downstairs so I could get outside, and there you were, getting your ass beaten on the ground."

"Well...thank you, regardless," I muttered, peeking into her office. "She would've caved my skull in eventually if you hadn't helped me out."

"Not a problem. You are my new boss after all," she said, stepping into her office. "So, just files and documents?"

"Any paperwork you can get your hooves on. I'll keep watch out here," I said, holding the tommygun in my hooves instead of my magic. "Just make it as quick as you can. We don't want to be here when back-up or the police arrive."

She did as I asked. Honestly I wasn't paying too much attention to the noises coming from inside the office. I just had my focus on the hallway, and anyone that might get gutsy enough to come our way. It was actually relaxing compared to what I'd just been through. It was only when I began to hear sirens off in the distance that I rushed both of us out of the area, with a nice heavy stack of folders and papers held securely on Gadget's back via her magic.

I had to avoid main streets given my current condition. I didn't want to attract any attention from any authorities. Gadget acted as a good brace for me whenever I got woozy or my hindleg decided to act up, and she didn't complain even once. Surprising manners, for someone like her.

"So...have a little faith in you, huh?" she said, the sarcasm in her voice all too evident.

"You can shut the fuck up." I grumbled in return, leaning my weight against her again to keep myself steady.

Author's Note

Well, R.I.P. in pieces, Ruby Red. We knew you...well, not at all, pretty much. Shame, really. She had potential. Ah well, more fuel for the fire! :pinkiecrazy:

I had a bit of assistance with the Russian/Gradios that appeared in this chapter. Special thanks to fatalerror328 and Stoned while writing!

Music I listened to for this one...well.

Chapter 21 - Aftermath

written by Fire Soul

"You look like shit."

I sighed in frustration, sitting in front of the bathroom mirror in my hotel room, out of the street clothes I'd been wearing in favor of putting myself back in a suit. If it were at all possible, her picture would be the only definition for the antithesis of 'tact' in the dictionary.

"Yes, I'm all too aware of that, thank you." I muttered, gently dabbing a cotton ball soaked with rubbing alcohol around a long cut on my cheek.

Despite her gauntlet, she didn't manage to do as much damage to my face as I expected. Of course, on the flip-side, my face still looked like it got pretty mashed up by someone. My snout was broken and the fur there was soaked with blood from my nostrils, my cheeks and my eyes were swollen, and I had multiple small and large cuts hiding away under my fur. Each one had to be carefully tended to, and the tenderness of my snout didn't make that any easier. I'd need to eventually go to a hospital to get it looked at, preferably sooner rather than later.

"Right, we have to talk, and we need to make it quick because I don't know when or if the police will arrive," I said, looking over at her through the reflection in the mirror. "We need to have our story straight."

"What? Why would the cops show up?" she asked, currently in the process of drying herself off after getting out of the shower.

"Because I didn't take the time, nor did I have the time, to clean up my magic signature from when I blew up that hallway."

"Magic signature?"

"Something that gets left behind for a certain period of time depending on the intensity and complexity of the spell cast," I explained, frowning a little. "On average, the spell I cast would take around a half-hour to an hour to dissipate, granted there aren't outside factors extending or shortening the lifespan of the signature. If there were unicorns near all of those blasts that released a lot of raw magic into the air upon death, it would shorten the time, but...no, we still need our stories straight."

"...You know, magic is not as useful as it seems to be when you read about it in books," she said, shaking her head slowly. "Glad I never learned to depend on it."

"Neither did I, outside of daily activities. In combat, magic is often a blunt instrument you bludgeon your opponent with, albeit from a distance. There's nothing subtle about calling lightning down from the skies and causing a lightning storm."

"Wait...you can do that?" she asked in a tone of disbelief.

"Getting back on track...I need to know everything you can tell me about Ruby and your working relationship towards her," I said, tilting my head a little. "Also, the guards in her home. Do they have any affiliation with the guards that keep an eye out at her arena?"

"No, she prefers to keep them separate," she told me, walking out of the bathroom. "The ones at her home were hired from some private security company a lot of the rich ponies in Stalliongrad consult with."

"Oh. That's unfortunate," I muttered, feeling a bit of guilt welling up in my chest. "If things had gone according to plan, I wouldn't have had to kill hardly any of them."

"Shit happens," she said so casually, the creaking of one of the beds telling me exactly where she was. "Nothing you can do about it now. You can answer for it when you wind up in Tartarus, right?"

"Somehow, that doesn't comfort me. Anyways," I said, clearing my throat and hissing in pain as I pressed the cotton ball against one of the cuts on my face. "Your working relationship with her. What was it like outside of the arena?"

"Well...."

It was weird, honestly. If I had been anyone else, it would've sounded like she and Ruby had been courting each other. Outside of work, Ruby occasionally went out with Gadget, sometimes as associates just picking up lunch, other times as two mares going out on a date. It didn't always end in sex, but it never surprised Gadget when it did. If there was one thing she was confident in, it was her ability to seduce a mare...even one like Ruby Red.

Still, I could work with that. I explained our story to her, one that we would have to follow to the letter, and I prayed with hope beyond hope that she could at the very least put on a convincing act. Well, if the cops actually showed up, that is. There was always the off chance that they wouldn't do a very thorough investigation, or miss my magic signature entirely.

Of course, to make this convincing, I couldn't afford for the police to not show up. I mean if they didn't get my signature, it would be fine, but I had no way to be sure of that. Best to err on the side of caution. As soon as Gadget and I had our stories straight with each other, I picked up the phone and gave the police a call.

I made sure to sound frantic. Not out of breath, but talking very fast, concern weaved into my words to really sell the performance. I had to sound innocent and young. Inexperienced with stuff like this. I'm just a young mare starting her journey through adult life, and all that nonsense. I needed to seem scared.

They had some officers on the way, and I took the time to collect myself and put some obvious bandages over my face to really work the whole pity angle on them. If I could make them feel sorry for a poor, innocent victim like myself, it'd be that much easier to convince them to just dismiss my magic signature, and thus my presence there, as nothing more than an unfortunate coincidence that has no real bearing on the investigation.

To think, all of this could've been avoided if it weren't for that fucking camera....

A lot of ponies make the mistake of thinking that when you're putting on an act like this, you just need to sound scared, innocent and vulnerable. That's not true very often. What you really need to do is understand yourself, and how others perceive you, and then you need to understand how you would react were you actually in this situation. What would your state of mind be? Are you determined, or brave? Are you a coward? Would you be curled up on your bed, trembling from what you'd just been through? Would you be sniveling like a bubble-blowing baby? Whatever you would be, don't lie to yourself and just conform to that image.

When the cops showed up, I had Gadget answer the door while I went into the bathroom. Gadget let the investigators in while I limped out of the bathroom, only slightly exaggerating the ache in my bad leg and the pain in my foreleg where Ruby had battered it when she had me pinned to the ground. The investigators were a pegasus and an earth pony.

"Hello ma'am. My name is Feather Duster," the pegasus said, motioning to his associate. "This is my partner Ramshackle. We got a call from dispatch, mentioned you rang about the attack on miss Ruby Red's home, yeah?"

"Yeah," I said, sitting down and rubbing the sore area on my foreleg. "I'm Twilight Sparkle, this is Gadget Steelmare. We were there."

"Mmmhmm. You weren't subtle about it," he said, pulling a notepad from a pocket on his uniform. "Left a magic signature the size of Manehattan in there! That hallway your doing?"

I nodded slowly. "The whole thing happened so fast, I didn't have a lot of time to think."

"Well, maybe you should start at the beginning. You got a license to cast?" he asked, sitting down and pulling out his pencil.

"Of course I have one!" I said, as if shocked they would even suggest otherwise. "I'm Celestia's personal student. A License to Cast is only natural."

"Mind showing it to me?" he asked, looking up from his notepad at me.

I nodded and reached into the pocket of my suit, pulling out a small wallet where I kept my ID, a few spare paper notes in case of emergencies, things like that. I pulled out my caster's license and my ID, hoofing them both over to him. I had to make a conscious effort to not use my magic to float it over. Non-unicorn cops tend to get a little twitchy when a potential suspect uses magic around them.

License to Cast. It was a standard thing for any trained mage to get, and the only thing that allowed me to learn spells beyond the second tier. Tiers one and two were civilian-grade, and they were all open to independent study, or being used in self-defense by your average unicorn, granted they put the time into learning said spells. There are still certain caveats and exceptions, but for the most part, you can find copies of most first and second-tier spells in your public library.

Getting your Caster's License is one of the first things you do if you're on the path to becoming a proper mage...after you've completed your basic studies of the first two tiers of magic, done sufficient study of the various schools...yeah. Spells of the third and fourth grade are very dangerous, and beyond that, you're getting into territory that could lead to a lot of issues...such as demonology studies, or creating golems. You can imagine how shit could hit the fan if an uncertified and unprepared individual attempted either of those particular magic studies. Accidents can still happen even with a certified individual of course, but at least they're less likely to fuck up summoning a succubus than some unlicensed street mage.

Mind you, studying magic isn't limited to just unicorns. If you're an earth pony or a pegasus and you want to study that stuff, you can to your heart's content. You just need to pass an entirely different series of tests. They may not be able to cast magic the way us unicorns can, but they can easily write those spells down, and the last thing we want is a fifth-tier spell becoming available to the public...or worse, criminals that actually have the gumption to learn them.

"Alright, everything seems fine here," Feather said after flipping both forms of identification over to examine them more thoroughly. "You know how it goes. The signature you left behind had the estimated intensity of a third-tier spell, so we're gonna need you to go down to the station when you've got some free time, fill out a form or two, give the details of the spell used, that sort of thing."

He hoofed my ID and my license back to me, and I tucked them away. Ramshackle just snorted and shook his head.

"Yeah, s'fine," Ramshackle chimed in, looking between Gadget and myself. "But what were you doing there?"

"Yeah, what's got a pony like you in Stalliongrad, lady Sparkle?" Feather chimed in. "Seems like a weird place for a Canterlot noble to be, let alone a hero, if the papers are to believed."

"Well, Stalliongrad has a lot of opportunities as long as you aren't aiming for millions. That's what I've been doing the past week or so," I explained, smiling a little. "Getting out from under Mom and Dad's bank accounts. Some spoiled nobles I won't name are content with living off of old money, but I'm not one of them."

Feather Duster had his notepad out again, and he was rapidly scribbling some things down as I spoke. When I paused, he looked up at me and motioned for me to continue with his hoof. I reached up and tapped my horn while looking between him and his partner.

"You mind if I use my magic real quick? I've got papers from some business deals I've been working on," I said, pointing over to my suitcase. "I'm investing in businesses here. That was actually the whole purpose of my trip, and that was why I was in miss Red's home."

I purposely ran a hoof through my mane and faked a shiver, slowly shaking my head and rapidly blinking my eyes while looking away from them. I needed to sell the fact that I was actually shaken by the supposed events that had happened, and just sitting there calmly wasn't going to do that for me.

"I-I'm still not entirely sure what happened. One moment I was looking for the bathroom, next thing I know, things are going crazy and I'm under attack."

"Uh, yeah, that's fine. Anything you can tell us about your attacker? That spell you cast dropped the security room into the basement," Feather told me, his faint smile fading just a little. "Security tapes didn't survive the fire that started."

How fortuitous for me! That saved me the trouble of having to go and get those tapes later that night. I was fully prepared to mess with some heads and have an officer retrieve them for me from evidence. Small blessings, right?

"Well, I know my attacker was a mare. Unicorn, I think. I can't imagine she could've survived my spell without a more significant amount of resistance to arcane forces," I said with a small shrug of my withers. "I remember dark green fur and blue eyes, but that's about it. Oh, aaand she definitely wasn't Stalliongradi."

"What makes you say that?" Feather asked, his pencil scribbling away at the notepad, held in one of his wings.

"Uh...she was my size, instead of my friend's size?" I said, pointing over at Gadget.

Gadget blinked a few times. "We are friends?"

I leaned over to give her a playful shove. "After what just happened? Pretty sure we are."

She hummed happily and nodded. "Hm! Friends then. Perhaps I will buy you dinner in an attempt to make it more than that?"

"Don't push it." I stated quickly, rolling my eyes.

"Alright, we're getting off-topic here," Ramshackle said, motioning between Gadget and I. "What were you doing at miss Red's home?"

"Well, I tend to wander, it's just something I do when I travel," I started, reaching out with my magic to float over several papers to let Feather have a look at. He seemed like the smarter of the two. "Invested in a few small businesses, conversed with a few of the locals...nothing special. Then I ran into Gadget here."

"Da, I met her when I worked for one of those tourist traps, around...I think three years ago?" Gadget offered, looking to me for confirmation. I just nodded. "Yes, three years ago. We talked a little, but it was nothing special. When we ran into each other on the street, I was surprised she recognized me."

"So was I! I just called out your name and you reacted."

"Probably one of the few nobles I have met that did not make me feel stupid." she said, smiling at the cops.

"Alright, so what?" Ramshackle asked, the irritation in his voice telling me that he was getting frustrated at not getting a straight answer.

"Oh! Well, Gadget knew miss Red, and when we got to talking and I mentioned why I was in Stalliongrad, she said she'd take me to meet miss Red. Really unofficial and spontaneous, but she didn't think that'd be a problem."

"How did you know miss Red?" Ramshackle asked Gadget, seeming to become a bit more invested now that he was getting some more important answers.

"I used to work for her. Small things, I think she took pity on me," she said, sniffing dismissively. "I was not always the beautiful image of pony perfection you see now. I grew up on the streets."

Feather chuckled at that. "Alright. So you worked for her. That's how you knew her then?"

"Da! This is obvious," she said, smiling just a little at him. "She and I had a few lunches here and there together, I would hesitate to call us friends, but knowing ponies in high places is a sure path to a more comfortable life."

"Uh, hey, sorry, I know this is an investigation, but...did you grow up speaking Gradios?" Feather asked Gadget curiously.

"Uh, yes? My смотритель spoke it very fluently, and she got me when I was just a little foal, so I grew up on it," Gadget explained to him, tilting her head. "You could not tell from my accent?"

"Well it's not that, it's just, it's so rare these days!" he said, grinning widely. "Could you say some more? I've actually never heard someone speak fluent Gradios before!"

"Не очень-то хочется с нуля в новом городе начинать. Я только в этом месяце с тремя кобылками переспала, и ты такой мягенький, что четвертой был-бы, если бы не был жеребцом," she said, letting out a small sigh. "Печально, что придется новую конюшню заводить."

I could see the excitement in Feather Duster's eyes. I didn't expect this, but it certainly wasn't unwelcome. The more they could endear themselves to them, the easier it would be to subtly convince them that we were innocent. I would have to get a good look at those police reports.

Feather was about to say something, but Ramshackle was there, seeming much more gruff about the whole thing, and gave his partner a small push with his hoof. His brow was furrowed and he seemed a bit more tense. I guess having the conversation derailed again had really bothered him. No bullshit, that one.

"If we could stay focused, Duster," he growled out, turning his attention back to us. "Please continue."

I nodded, then frowned a little. "There's not much to say. Gadget walked me in, went to speak with Ruby, I went to find the bathroom, and next thing I know there's gunfire and I'm in the thick of it. I didn't have any time to react properly."

"Soooo...you responded with a quickly-cast spell," Feather offered, returning to his notepad. "Quite a spell to default to...."

I shrugged at that. "It was meant to just be a kind of outward burst, to get an attacker off of myself with potentially lethal force, but it came out as a series of uncontrolled blasts. I felt them swirl randomly through the air, there were explosions, then bam. I'm waking up in a pile of rubble, there's more gunfire in the distance, and Gadget's helping me up and getting me out of there."

"Well, you look awfully clean for someone that dropped through the floor," Ramshackle noted, looking me up and down a few times. "Your clothes, especially."

"Oh, that's because I changed," I said, motioning to a small pile of dirty laundry I'd stacked in the corner. "I was actually wearing these."

I reached out and picked up the two garments I'd slipped on for that particular outing, floating them over to show them to the officers. They were dusty and scraped up from the explosion in the hallway and my tussle with Ruby, but if I threw them in the wash, they'd be fine. Both Ramshackle and Feather Duster looked the clothes over before glancing at me in confusion.

"Why would a noble wear street clothes?" Feather asked. "They're not even brand-name."

I frowned at that, flicking my tail a little. "You know who I am and how much the newspapers are calling me a hero and giving me all this attention. Aside from me being a noble of good standing, it's been getting me a lot of questions and on-lookers that I'd like to avoid when I'm not working. You'd be surprised how much a simple shift in one's clothing from formal and fancy to commoner on the street can help you blend in as if you're nopony special."

Ramshackle snorted and shook his head. "No, I wouldn't be surprised."

"So, wrong place at the wrong time, huh lady Sparkle?" Feather asked, chuckling good-naturedly and tucking his notepad away. "Can't say it's the worst thing I see. You should probably stop wandering the streets like that though."

I smiled at him and shrugged. "I've been doing that since I was little! If I can't handle myself by now, what in Tartarus is wrong with me?"

Feather just shrugged at that and looked over to Ramshackle. "Eh, think we need to bring 'em in for questioning?"

Ramshackle's attention diverted to us, and he rubbed his chin a little in contemplation. There were a lot of factors here, and either we were going to be called out because someone saw Gadget helping me, or this would go over a lot smoother than I expected. Of course, that carried little hope for me, because things rarely go as smooth as I want them to.

"Nah, I don't think so. No one mentioned 'em, and if miss Steelmare's around often enough, it wouldn't surprise me if they just got used to looking past her presence," he said, turning and heading for the door. "C'mon, let's get outta here, we got more work to do."

Well, never let it be said that things never went as smoothly as I wanted them to....

There was a sigh of relief from both of us once Feather and Ramshackle had left. I'd fully expected Ramshackle to insist that I come in for further questioning. As it stood, our story was passable only if other eye-witness accounts didn't contradict things, and I'm fairly sure no one alive actually saw Gadget or myself. Even if they did, their accounts could be called into question, considering how many unknowns there were. Body modification may be illegal, but illusions aren't, and if there was more than one intruder...well. You see where I'm going with this.

Regardless, I needed to be sure. But first and foremost, I needed to get Gadget out of the city for a while. That would buy me the time I needed to ensure that they didn't count her as a suspect. If they did, I would be called into question as well.

"Well, that was a hot load of bullshit we spewed from our mouths," Gadget cued in, wrestling me from my thoughts. "What now?"

"Well now, you're going to get some sleep, then you're leaving Stalliongrad."

"...Just like that?"

"Yes. I have a place you can go until I return from my business here. Red's fighting arena will have to go dark for a time, but I can restart it later. I just need to get the diamond dogs to dance to my tune," I said, a few addresses running through my mind. "The place I have in mind may or may not have a pegasus there waiting for me already. Goes by the name of Shady Wings."

"Alright...will he shoot me on sight or something? I have never met him."

"No, he'll be fine as long as you give him a message from me. He knows my penmareship."

I quickly reached out with my magic for several blank pieces of paper from my suitcase, picking up a pen and rapidly writing a message over them. It was nothing special or specific, I just needed to make sure it got the message across that she was trustworthy and could be let in to stay there until I got back home.

"Here. Knock on the door three times at the address on that paper when you get to Canterlot, and hoof it over to him if he's even there. If he's not, there's a small opening on the left side of the steps, you can pull it open with magic or a magnet," I explained, floating it over to her. "He'll set you up in one of the rooms, and there should be a small stash of bits still there from the last time I restocked. You can use that to, I dunno, go out to eat, buy a hooker, I don't really give a fuck. Just don't spend all of it."

Gadget hmph'ed and shook her head. "I would never lower myself to banging a hooker, хитрожопый."

"Hey. Prostitution is perfectly legal in Equestria as long as you're registered and your license is valid. Don't go looking down on them just because they get paid to fuck," I said, smirking a little. "I'm surprised that isn't your chosen profession."

"Hah~! Fuck you." she said, turning away from me.

"You wish." I shot back, giving her a nudge.

She snorted at me and stood up, looking to the paper for a moment before glancing back at me. "I have no way to carry this. I will have to go to the arena first to pick up my things."

"I'll go with you then. Will the guards be a problem?" I asked, reaching for my own saddlebags, and my bit pouch.

"Not if you go in disguise."

"Can't. The magic could agitate my injuries in really bad ways."

She shrugged at that. "Then I suppose you cannot come along."

"No, I'll just watch from a distance. There are still some unknowns, and if anyone really knew you helped me, well...you might be in trouble," I explained to her, frowning a bit. "I don't have any guns, but I can throw rubble without leaving a magic signature, and I can be pretty damn accurate with it. If the guards pull guns on you, just focus on getting out of the way."

"After what I saw, I will simply take your word for it. Shall we?"

I made a point of changing clothes once again before heading out. Another pair of casual commoner clothes, this time a thick hoodie and a pair of track pants I'd picked up while I was traveling around Stalliongrad. Nothing special, just something to blend in better.

Fortunately, when we arrived at the arena, things seemed pretty chaotic, but no one suspected Gadget. She was able to walk right in, grab her stuff and get back out. She had a bit pouch full of bits, a big pair of saddlebags that were packed full of her things, and no one gave her a second glance. I suppose with all the chaos Ruby's death kicked up, it was only to be expected.

We got back to the hotel with zero fuss. She got her things together, and the next morning, she was gone. Made sure to get up nice and early too. Me, I had two things to take care of myself, but one would have to wait until I healed. I would probably wind up going back to Stalliongrad in a month or so, so that wasn't a problem. Gadget would be able to get me in contact with who I needed to talk to in order to get that arena going again.

That left one very important task that I needed to absolutely deal with: the police. There were still far too many unknowns regarding the investigation, and I needed to make sure nothing really...sprang up on me by surprise, y'know? How fortunate that I would blend right in at the police station while filling out the paperwork they needed from me.

Compared to the infiltration of Ruby's house, this was far more of a cake-walk. Without Gadget around observing my actions, I could get away with a lot more. Specifically, when Feather Duster showed up to observe me and read over the paperwork I filled out, it was all too easy to plant some very specific thoughts in his head. A few little things I'd cooked up ahead of time, similar to what I'd used on the two guards, but nowhere near as complex.

Rather than fabricating a complicated series of memories by planting the seed in his head, this was more like...planting a thought. I needed to get him to come back to my hotel room, of his own volition, without saying a word to anyone. I went with curiosity as my basis for him coming back to me, and I cast it all under the guise of using my magic to hold my pen while I filled out my paperwork. Just a small crush, a tiny ember in his thoughts that maybe, just maybe, could become something more if he played his cards right. I could only count myself fortunate that he was naturally confident. It would've taken me forever to actually get him to have the balls to show up unannounced with the intention of getting closer to someone of my standing.

So many ponies romanticize it, try to play love and crushes and stuff like that up like it's some sort of magical thing. Perhaps to some extent it is, but that's not all it is. Love is a complicated blend of emotions in a sapient mind, influenced by the release of various chemicals in the brain and the body. I would even argue that it's an altered state of mind entirely. It was something I could work with. I could game the system, so to speak.

I went about the rest of my day as expected. I went to the hospital, got my face looked at by a trained medical professional, and the end result was a whole lot of bandages hiding a somewhat uncomfortable brace, since apparently my snout was broken a bit worse than I thought. It actually made it a little difficult to breathe. Of course on the flip-side, they gave me some vicodin, so...silver lining. That stuff's fun as long as you don't abuse it.

Feather Duster didn't show up at the hotel until later in the afternoon. Right around three-thirty, just a little after if I'm remembering correctly. I let him in without a fuss, and the moment the door was closed, I knocked him out with a spell. With him asleep, his mind was an open book for me, and I could take my time weaving very specific, and much more complex instructions into his head.

First, I erased his memories of his thoughts towards me. I searched his mind for memories of friends, perhaps a favorite hangout of his, and carefully fabricated a memory of going out drinking before going home for the evening and getting some rest. I kept those fake memories locked away for later. What came after that was...well, just a bit darker.

I took control of his consciousness, and established a series of commands for him to follow without question, without acknowledging that he was following orders at all. It was similar to hypnosis, but far more direct and far more reliable. I didn't need to be there to flick his ear as some sort of trigger. He would simply do as he was instructed, without error. He was to get me a copy of every single statement and any security videos the police may have secured, just in case he and Ramshackle had been lying to me about that.

The whole process took me a little over two hours. If anyone asked questions, he was simply taking his work home. If anyone tried to hold him up, he'd dismiss himself as soon as possible. I didn't need him lingering around when I was working mind magic on him. I waited anxiously in my hotel room, too worked up to watch the television in the meantime. All I had was the tick-tock of the clock on the wall, and my own slightly labored breathing that was bordering on being an annoying nasal whistling sound.

He returned just over a half-hour later, a thick folder tucked under his wing. He was still in his police uniform, and once he'd closed the door behind himself and he'd passed the folder off to me, his eyes became vacant and distant. I ordered him over to the bed and bade him to lay down. He moved with such robotic motions, it was a bit unnerving. I'd seen it a few times before, when I'd been experimenting with mind magic more, but it'd been a few years since then.

The room was silent save for the shuffle of papers and the light breathing of my vacant-minded companion. There was the clock as well, but that faded into the background as I took in the statements from several members of security in Ruby's house, and several of her staff. I combed over each statement slowly and deliberately, comparing each one and making sure those stories matched. I made several amendments to the statements from the security guards and kept the corrected ones aside from the ones that didn't need to be fixed. Just three security guards making mention of me in the hallway, followed by a powerful blast of magic. They never saw Gadget and I leave.

None of the staff had spotted Gadget, which I was thankful for. It would suck to have to alter every single statement. One member of the staff actually saw me however, but since I was in disguise, well...all I needed to change was the description of the clothes I'd been wearing. Considering neither Feather Duster or Ramshackle had bothered to take me in the moment they saw my dirty clothes, I could only assume they either didn't put two and two together, or they hadn't really looked over the statements as carefully as they should've. Their loss, my gain.

With his mind already prepped for what I needed from him, I created another series of commands, something a bit simpler this time. He was to return to the police station, and pick up the previous statements. Rewrite them, print them out, replace them, and take the original statements home to be burned. Nothing complicated, nothing excessive. Once that was done, he could go home, fall asleep, and wake up the next morning remembering nothing of the previous night. After that, it was just a waiting game for me.

This all worked out in my favor. By the time anyone discovered the changes made to the statements, if anyone ever found out, my influence on Feather's mind would have faded enough that no one would be able to figure out that it was me. All that would be left after that is suspicion, but no one to point hooves at...other than Feather Duster. What would he be able to say, if someone actually found out he'd altered the evidence? That he didn't do it? He didn't remember doing it? A lie detector test wouldn't even work because, well...without knowing that he actually did it, having zero recollection, how could he truly lie if he said he didn't do it?

The whole thing would lead them on a wild goose chase, no doubt about it. Still, I couldn't help but still be worried about the whole thing. Sometimes, investigators can be really crafty and cunning, beyond what you expect, and there's always that feeling that you forgot something important. Three days later, that feeling faded somewhat, which I was thankful for.

I went about the remainder of my week finishing up my business around Stalliongrad. Compared to the storm of events involving Ruby Red, striking business deals was dreadfully boring, but necessary. I had hit a snag in the sense that the arena would have to fall apart for a time until my next business trip there, because my injuries sure weren't going to heal up properly within a week, but I'd been patient my entire life about things like this. I could wait a little longer.

By the end of the week I was exhausted and more than ready to head home. I knew I had more work to do when I got there, but I was already starting to miss Spike. He really was the light of my life, when I wasn't doing disgusting shit like killing some mare I didn't even know...not to mention probably killing a lot of mares and stallions that were just hired to watch a house. Just ponies doing their jobs. That was another taint on my soul I'd willingly bear.

Celestia had drilled it into me, and I respected her wisdom a whole lot more than any of the ponies I'd learned from in the Mafia. Strength of will and a good moral compass matter more than anything. If you make a mistake, especially a mistake that hurts others, you face it. Don't turn away from it like a coward. None can show loyalty to a leader that lacks courage to accept their faults and do their best to overcome them. A leader does not turn and run in that regard.

Initially, I'd dismissed that lesson as foolish. What place does honor have with criminals? But as I got to know her better, got to learn more from her, well...I agreed with her, to an extent. Not everyone has the fortitude to think back on the innocent ponies they've killed and accept it. It eats away at them on the inside. I'm a sick monster though, so I can cope. More of a halfbreed, really. A mix of a dark and psychotic monster that loves killing her prey, and a sensible mask of a pony that can blend in with the rest of society.

I would remember what I did to them. I refuse to allow myself to forget.

It almost felt like a final push, when I started packing my things to head home. I still needed the brace around my snout when I boarded the train, and I was sure Spike would be very, very worried. I suppose that sort of thing just comes with the territory. How could I blame him for being concerned? Mom's coming home with her face all busted up like she decided to box with a minotaur. I mean, my only equivalent moment of genuine concern for my parents was when my Father took a pair of bullets to the knees and my Mother got shot in the ass, but still. Couldn't blame him.

As soon as I was settled into my seat on the train, I deflated and slumped in my seat. I'd seen enough of Stalliongrad for a while, and doing this sort of thing without a crew was a whole lot harder than I'd predicted. Not having contacts and influence with the police, not having reliable assistance...yeah. This was an uphill battle, definitely. I could do it though. I had to do it.

With a hiss and a loud whistle from the train, I cracked a smile and laid myself down in my seat. I was finally heading home. Maybe once I got back, I'd take Spike back to Ponyville for a couple days. I promised I'd visit after all, and he already had friends there. I had friends there...that was a weird thought. It made me feel warm inside, though. Friends....

Yeah. Maybe a few days. A week, or something. I couldn't claim to understand why they would call me their friend so easily, but I was curious enough to find out. After what I'd been through in Stalliongrad, I could've used the down-time. My ears were still bothering me from how I'd abused those alterations I'd made to how my brain works. I kept hearing...really weird, melodic sounds, like wind chimes or ice shattering. Probably just a symptom, nothing more. I'd have a look at myself once I got back home.

For now, I just laid my head down over my forelegs, closed my eyes and let the rumble of the train lull me to sleep. A nap sounded nice.

Author's Note

It must be fun to lie so fluently, eh? Let's hope Twilight and Gadget actually got away with it.

Credit goes to fatalerror328 and Stoned while writing for the Gradios/Russian seen in this chapter!

Chapter 22 - Homecoming

written by Fire Soul

You don't know what you have until you've spent a lot of time away from it. One of my associates from my Mafia days used to tell that to me, whenever he had to leave Manehattan for his own special brand of work. He was a very talented cleaner, had contacts everywhere, could make almost any mess disappear, granted enough time. He had two foals and a wife waiting for him at home back then, and he used to tell me about how there was nothing better than coming home to an embrace in his wife's warm hooves. He was real sappy like that. Oh, he also mentioned how it was a travesty that a young pony like myself was involved in Mafia work, but that was life for you.

I didn't understand what he meant back then. I never thought I would understand, really. Then I wound up getting Spike, and suddenly it made complete sense to me. There were few things more satisfying in my life than Spike running up, arms raised, waiting for a nice big hug from me. Every single time, I laid down and snatched him up the moment he was in hugging distance.

My return from Stalliongrad was no different. Of course, there was the unwanted concern with my appearance. The muzzle brace was cause for concern, and of course the whole run-in was in the papers. I'd been confronted by reporters the moment I'd gotten off the train. Flashing cameras from the left and the right, in front of me, I had nowhere to run. I gave them simple, quick responses and immediately headed for home. Much like that old associate of mine, after a long day of being away from home, tiny Spike-hugs were one of the most valuable commodities ever, and he was more than willing to give tons of them to me.

Then he saw the muzzle brace, and I had to assure him I was fine while he blubbered at the sight of me so injured. I managed to calm him down after like six minutes of him pouting and clinging at the fur on my barrel, and trust me, he didn't make it easy. He didn't like the brace at all. Every time I brought my muzzle close to him, he had to resist the urge to pull it off. I had to make him understand that it was helping me heal, something he didn't take to heart until he really got his hands on it, and he pulled hard enough to make me shout in pain. He let go real quick when that happened.

I sent him to bed that night without gems for that. I wouldn't tolerate bad behavior like that, and he knew it. He said he was sorry a lot, but if I let him off the hook, what then? He learns that saying 'I'm sorry' means he can get away with things as long as he feels bad about it? No, actions have consequences, end of story.

Of course, my peaceful relaxation didn't last. The morning after, I'm talking like immediately around seven in the morning, just as I was getting out of the shower, Spike waddled into the bathroom with a summons that'd been delivered by one of the guards. Celestia wanted to see me. Oh, joy.

I still didn't feel ready to confront her, but I suppose that if I kept putting it off, I'd never get around to it. Best to take care of it while she's feeling confrontational. At least, I think she was feeling confrontational. It was rather forward of her to send a guard to deliver a summons to me rather than just writing a letter saying she'd like me to stop by so we could talk.

Unfortunately, I couldn't put off a summons. I was supposed to go check in on Gadget, and hopefully Shady as well if he'd actually decided to help me, but they would have to wait. Hopefully I could keep this short and get right back home so I could get myself dressed up to head out under a different disguise. I was just thankful that my parents weren't home. Then again, that was nothing new.

The walk to the castle was a bit refreshing. Some complain about how the air up in Canterlot is thinner than it should be, but I turned out alright, so I didn't see the issue. I liked the comparatively warmer breeze, and after spending two weeks in Stalliongrad, it actually felt a bit warmer than I was comfortable with. Eh, I'd adjust in time.

As soon as I was in the castle, I began to head for the usual room she and I met in, but the guards quickly pointed me in a different direction. Her private chambers. I cringed internally at that and clenched my jaw while I prepared for what could very well be an incoming shouting match. There wasn't a more private place in all of Equestria than Celestia's private chambers. She'd constructed that room with her own magic, woven the runes, painstakingly crafted everything in as complete privacy as she possibly could so no one could ever get a clear look at the runes she'd inscribed into the thick walls that acted as the framework.

If she wished to kill you in there, not even the guards posted just outside would hear your screams. Nor would they be able to help you if they did, since only Celestia's magic can seal and unseal the locks on the chamber doors. It was simultaneously the safest and most terrifying place I could imagine, because I had no way to get out once I was sealed in there with her. Not to mention, it was the chamber of an ancient Equestrian Goddess! All of her most prized, most treasured possessions were kept in there. What right did I have to lay my eyes upon them?

This wasn't my first time in her chambers, however, and no, I did not sneak in there. I'm damn good, and the balcony's an excellent entry point if you can reach it and get through the wards on the internal sealed doors behind the balcony doors before the patrolling pegasi spot you, but that's a risk I never saw any reason to take. No, I'd been invited into her chambers before. Strange thing is, she rarely sleeps there. She usually stays in a secondary suite that's more open to the rest of the castle. I guess differentiating between your workplace and your home requires more unique efforts when your home is a part of your workplace.

The moment I arrived, the guards asked me a few standard questions before knocking on the chamber doors by pulling a large metal knocker that hung from one of the two doors. Just the questions that would confirm that I am indeed Twilight Sparkle, and not someone else. With a noisy sound of magic twinkling away into the sky, a thin line of magic between the two doors dissipated, the doors opening with a small groan as the two guards gave them a push.

Within, opulence awaited. Celestia was not known for being the vain sort, littering her life with gold and gaudy portraits of herself in beautiful dresses and the like. At least, these days she wasn't. Back then, when Equestria was just recovering from Discord's psychotic reign, ponies were eager to shower her in gold and silver, to cover their Goddesses in riches to thank their saviors. This room, so removed from modern society, was bathed in ancient architecture. A little haven, frozen in time, only permitting alterations when its owner wished.

This was only my third time in here. Celestia and I may have been close, but everything in that room was more dear to her than anyone she knew. The fact that I'd even been allowed in was a testament to how much she truly trusted me. It was that thought, at the time, that stung me the hardest. I didn't belong there. I wasn't worthy of her trust.

The walls were decorated with numerous paintings, few of them belonging to her. Many of them were portraits of old friends and lovers, ponies she secreted away to in the dead of night to relax with under complicated illusions, whether for simple companionship or for more carnal pursuits. At the end of the day, she was just as much of a pony as I was, and she had needs. For all I knew, she had a lover hidden away already, and she hadn't even told me. I wouldn't have faulted her.

The tall marble pillars in the corners were mostly for decoration, though they had etchings near their base, depicting various accomplishments our ancestors had achieved while under her rule. This entire nation really was her life's work, when you thought about it. The plain appearance of the marble in comparison to the gold and jewel-encrusted tables, polished mahogany wood finely hoof-crafted acting as stands for various other smaller pictures and objects...it was quite striking, how much the pillars stood out.

I could see why she rarely slept in here. Lots of happy memories, but also clear indicators of her past indulgences. I'm quite sure that after the loss of her sister, many of these things were obtained as coping mechanisms, a bit of material wealth to fill the empty hole in her heart, albeit in vain. I'm sure she knew it was all in vain as well, but when faced with such despair, even a very brief feeling of relief is welcome compared to nothing at all. Who could ever comfort someone that wouldn't see their only family member for a thousand years? We were only fortunate that she was strong enough to pull through it. Otherwise, we might've seen...I dunno, Nightmare Sun? Nightmare Dawn? Or maybe she just would've gone mad and become a second coming of Discord. Maybe some kind of perfect-order dystopia....

When I stepped into the room, crystal lights lining the walls lit up with a healthy, room-illuminating glow while the door shut behind me with a magic tinkling sound. Celestia was standing at her balcony doors, watching the pegasi patrol the skies, the sealed door open to let the light in. I opened my mouth to say something to her, but she beat me to the punch.

"Before anything else," she said, not even looking back at me. "Are you well? Any grievous injuries, ones of permanence?"

I shook my head slowly. "No, nothing like that. Just a broken snout."

The way she seemed to just heave out that sigh gave me reason for pause. Was she really that concerned? I don't know why. I could take care of myself just fine.

"Thank the stars above! I was so worried," she said, finally looking back at me with an oddly genuine and warm smile. "I feared you would return with a damaged horn. Your facial trauma was described as 'particularly vicious'."

I snorted, then winced in pain. "It's not that bad. That's just the newspapers sensationalizing it."

"Yes, well, one of the newly-branded heroes of Equestria gets injured, they see bit signs," she said, closing and sealing the doors to her balcony before walking over to her small gold-rimmed stone table, sitting down on one of the larger cushions. "With that out of the way, we have things to discuss. Such as all the cheek you have."

I blinked a few times at that while taking a seat across from her. "Cheek?"

"Yes. So much cheek that I need more than one hoof to smack some sense into you," she stated, the sudden intensity of her voice and the furrowing of her brow making me nervous. "I am disappointed."

Something about the way she said that made me recoil on the inside. I felt as if I'd been slapped, and that wasn't the dull ache already covering my muzzle. I felt bad, hearing that from her. It was like I was being scolded by the Mother I never really had.

"I don't...I don't follow."

"Twilight Sparkle, do not lie to me!" she snapped at me, clenching her teeth a little. "You dare to yell at me about invading your privacy and going behind your back, then you go and do this?!"

She held up the newspaper she'd left folded on the table, and I glanced at it with indifference. I cared little for what it had to say. I knew what had really happened. Whatever they said in that headline article meant very little to me, and being able to say I didn't read it gave the gossiping nobles something to talk to me about. Still...'Hero of Equestria Maimed in Home Invasion - Coincidence, or Setup?!' was really hamming it up, as the griffons would say.

"And how is that my doing?" I asked calmly.

"Do not treat me like some naive fool," she hissed at me, slamming the paper down. "What were you up to in Stalliongrad?"

"I was securing business deals to ensure my future income-"

"What were you really doing in Stalliongrad?" she corrected, her eyes narrowing.

I leaned back away from her just a little and frowned. "I just told you-"

"Stop lying to me!!"

The sheer force of her shout was enough to rattle my teeth and make me flatten my ears, utterly overwhelmed by the volume. I actually felt myself slide back a little along with the cushion under me, and I had to dig my forehooves in to avoid getting blown back too far. When it was over, silence reigned between us, and I could see the creases on her face. She was scowling at me in a way I'd never seen her do before. I didn't like it at all. It made me feel like I'd done something terrible to her.

"Don't lie to me, Twilight. I am begging you," she said, her voice much softer now, quiet in comparison to how she just yelled at me. "I'm sorry for going behind your back the way I did, but I trust that you understand deep down why I did what I did. Please trust me, in turn."

I did understand. Cooler heads always prevail, and I knew that she went behind my back because she was concerned. Concerned about me, concerned about how I could so easily pull the trigger on her sister...concerned about a lot of things. She was probably even concerned for me, at the time. What if all this hero of Equestria stuff caused someone to look into my criminal records and they found, I dunno...lots of charges they could have a field day with in the newspapers? My life would quite literally have been ruined, if that were in any way possible.

"...I'm sorry," I muttered, clearing my throat. "I didn't mean to explode on you the way I did. That was wrong of me."

The silence returned with a vengeance. I could feel her staring at me, but I couldn't will myself to look up and meet her gaze. I felt pretty bad about everything, really. She knew that the newspapers didn't have the right story, she wasn't a moron about stuff like this. I should've known I couldn't fool her, with her knowing what she knew about me.

It felt like forever before the silence was broken. I was just thankful she didn't have me in shackles or something.

"I am going to ask you some very simple questions Twilight, and I want complete honesty no matter what," she said, her tone brooking no argument. "Understand?"

"...Yes, Princess." I muttered, sitting up a little straighter.

"Good. Are you still working for the Mafia?"

I shook my head quickly. "Absolutely not, and I never would again if I could help it."

She nodded once and took a breath. "Will something like this happen again?"

"Not if I can help it." I said, looking up at her.

She and I stared into each other's eyes for quite some time. I was doing my best to maintain my demeanor, but she'd really gotten to me. Celestia was my friend, and probably the one person I trusted more than anyone else...which, given recent events, wasn't saying a lot. Her gaze was searching, watching my body language and gazing into my eyes, looking to root out any sign of deceit. With her life experiences, I wouldn't have been surprised if she spotted even the slightest hint of deception.

"I have asked you this once before, and I wasn't satisfied with your answer," she said slowly, leaning forward a little as if to drill the point home. "Are you a threat to my subjects?"

I had done a lot of soul-searching, and a whole lot of thinking, after she asked me this the first time. No matter which way I sliced it, no matter how I looked at it, there was only one honest answer to that question. My gaze faltered and I clenched my jaw once more, looking down at the table. Just because I knew it was the only right answer didn't mean I had to like it...or feel good about it.

"Yes." I whispered, my posture failing me slightly.

There was that damn silence again! Heavy, oppressive, and making me more nervous by the minute. All I heard from Celestia was a sharp inhale, followed by that droning, stretching silence that I was beginning to really hate. Not that it mattered. I firmly believed that she was about to take some serious action against me, and there was no way for me to really resist. I had all but admitted to doing some very bad things, and aside from not having any real evidence, I was quite sure she had a good idea of what really happened.

I heard her move, shuffling out of her seat, her hooves lightly stepping over the plush carpet before she sat down next to me. Any moment now, she'd have me in her magic, I'd have a suppressor on, and she'd drag me off to the dungeons until she found a way to deal with me properly. That was what I thought, anyway. You can imagine my surprise when I was suddenly and quite smoothly ushered into a hug by her.

Forelegs snaked around me and pulled me closer while wings enveloped me on all sides with their pure, white warmth. They felt so soft against me, and when I looked up, all I could see was her neck and her mane as she curled herself down and around me somewhat. I felt surrounded on all sides, safe and warm and, most alien to me, genuinely cared for. She conveyed so much with nothing more than a simple hug...it was overwhelming. Of course, that could've also been because outside of Spike, I wasn't really used to hugs from anyone, even my brother.

"I don't know what you were doing or why you did it, and perhaps it's best that I don't know, but I have only one request, my student," she said quietly, lifting her head to speak to me more clearly. "Don't get caught. Please."

I twitched and my eyes went wide at that. Was she really...?

"If they catch you...if anyone catches you..." she said slowly, deliberately, the sheen of her eyes saying so much more than she likely intended. "There's nothing I can do for you."

I let out a shuddering breath and stared at her in that moment. I wasn't used to this at all. No one had ever cared about me this much except Spike, and he was far too young to truly comprehend why I was doing what I was doing. I never wanted him to get involved with any of this, in any way. To see Celestia being so caring towards me like this...I was unnerved, and I felt a hitching in my chest.

"Yes," I mumbled slowly, blinking the water from my eyes. "I'll do my best, Princess."

"That's all I can ask of you," she said with a strained smile, slowly letting me go and patting me on my wither. "Thank you for being honest with me."

I shook myself out of my stupor and nodded. "Y-yeah. Thank you for...for understanding."

She simply bowed her head to me and exhaled slowly, deeply, seeming to deflate while tucking her wings in against her sides. I found myself doing the same, minus the wings. I felt so exhausted suddenly, but also relieved. I didn't understand the pressure I'd felt before or why it was gone, but maybe being at least partially candid about my activities with someone helped me.

I watched her for a moment as she glanced to a picture frame sitting on one of the dressers in her room, and cleared my throat. "I would like to resume my studies whenever you feel it would be appropriate, Princess."

"I would like that as well," she said, standing up and motioning to the door. "Perhaps in a few days? I will send you a letter."

"That works for me. I'm taking Spike to Ponyville tomorrow."

"That sounds like a wonderful idea, for you and for him."

"Before that however, I have an old acquaintance from Stalliongrad that I'd like to recommend for the Royal Guard," I told her, tilting my head just a little. "Can you help with that?"

Celestia gave me an appraising look, but she nodded. "I can help, I believe. Does she have a criminal record?"

"Most likely."

Celestia sighed and nodded again. "The guard often overlooks such things as long as you haven't done anything too serious. Will that be a problem?"

"I don't know, I'll have to ask her," I admitted, rubbing the back of my neck. "But it shouldn't be an issue. She's not smart enough to evade the police if she did do anything too extreme."

"Then we shall see, and when we are sure, I will speak to the recruiting office in the castle," she said, glancing to me curiously. "Is that all?"

I simply nodded and waited for her to unseal the door. When the magic was removed, the door was pulled open by her magic, and I stepped out into the hall. With a brief goodbye, I left her chambers behind and began to make my way through the halls to get out of the castle as quick as I could.

It wasn't until I was halfway there that I had to stop and wipe my eyes. I felt relieved, I felt upset, I felt ashamed...and it was making it hard to keep my composure. My breath kept hitching and I couldn't stop the tears from flowing...I couldn't let anyone see me like that. I stepped out of sight next to one of the large pillars in the hall and tried to keep my noise down while I, for the first time in a very long time, actually had a good old-fashioned cry.

It wasn't in my nature to let things like this get to me, so why did it hurt so much?

I couldn't tell you how long I sat there, trying to get myself under control. My broken muzzle only ached more as I sniffled and struggled to contain my sobs. For the most part I succeeded, but I definitely needed some more painkillers afterwards. My eyes were red and bloodshot, it was all too obvious that I'd just cried my eyes out. Spike would notice, Shady would notice if he was at the safehouse, and Gadget would definitely notice. Instead of going directly home or to the safehouse, I took some time to go for a walk and pick up a small packet of tissues to carefully blow my nose. If the sniffling hurt, blowing my nose was agony.

When I finally felt like I'd gotten it all out of my system, I headed straight home and lounged in the luxury that was dragon cuddles. It wasn't exactly the body-enveloping embrace I would've preferred, but the warmth was there. That warm, tingling delight in your chest that makes you feel like everything's going to be okay...kinda like the big all-inclusive hug Celestia gave me, actually.

Unfortunately, while I was doing that, I'd lost track of time. See, there were certain times of the day and week that I made a point of being out of the house and staying out until certain ponies either went back to work, went to bed, or just left the house in general. I didn't worry much about my brother, but my parents? They were another matter entirely.

I heard the clatter of keys and the shuffling of bags as the front door swung open, and I stepped out of Spike's room to greet my Mother, much as I was loathe to do so. There were still manners to uphold, a facade of respect for the one who birthed me. Spike was present, after all. No need to pass my disgust down to him as well. On the contrary, he loved my Mother. I think she saw him as a sort of second chance. I wouldn't begrudge her that. If I were her, I'd want a second chance as well after the massive fuck-up I'd been responsible for.

"Mom." I said, giving her a brief nod while grabbing hold of the grocery bags she had in her magic.

"Hey, Twilight." she said, her voice subdued and a forced smile quickly being brought to bear against me.

I returned the smile as best I could while Spike came running down the stairs. He almost fell and tripped in his rush to give my Mother a hug, and I quickly scolded him for not keeping a claw on the railing and running too fast.

"Twilight, what's-oof!" my Mother began to say, only to be interrupted by my son. "Hello Spike."

"Hi, grandma! Mom hurt her face." he said, as innocently as ever.

"It was in the newspapers," I stated calmly, carrying the groceries into the kitchen. "But I know you don't read those."

"I'll go to my grave saying that we need a more reliable source of news. I'll bet the headline was something stupid, wasn't it?" she asked, walking into the kitchen after me with Spike climbing up onto her back.

I snorted at that and rolled my eyes. "Of course it was. It insinuated the home invasion was a plot against my life. I'm shocked they didn't try to insinuate that Gadget perpetrated it."

"Oh," she muttered, starting to put the groceries away with her magic, ducking her head in the fridge to see what she could fit in there. "Who's Gadget?"

"Old acquaintance of mine, ran into her by chance while I was in Stalliongrad."

"I didn't know you were going to Stalliongrad," she muttered while shuffling various items about in the fridge. "Wait...old acquaintance?"

"Not one of them, Mom."

"Oh, thank goodness." she sighed out, stepping back to remove her head from the fridge.

I felt this dart of anger in my chest, irrational and uncontrolled, that told me it wasn't any of her business anyways. Not like she cared enough to not go into debt and offer my magic skills as payment. That wasn't fair though...I knew she cared. How much of that came from maternal love or a feeling of guilt however, I couldn't determine. I didn't really want to know.

I went to work helping her put the groceries away, with Spike on her back watching both of us work. I was just thankful he couldn't tell there was some tension between my Mother and I, and when I sent him upstairs to play with his toys, that tension became all-consuming. It was like a blanket of oppression that made my fur stand on end and my pulse throb in my ears. I don't like being alone with her, or my Father. I don't like being around either of them, but at least when I have a reason to fake it, I can focus on keeping up the mask.

"So...?"

I perked my ears up suddenly. "What?"

"What happened to you?" she asked, the sound of tin cans clanking together sounding off from behind me.

"I was in the wrong place at the wrong time. Got attacked," I said, motioning to my face. "Got a nasty souvenir from fighting back with magic."

"...Are you okay?" she asked hesitantly, her hooves clopping against the floor as she turned around.

I looked back to her and nodded. "Yeah, m'fine."

"Are you sure?"

"I'm fine, Mom." I said a bit louder, irritated.

It was unfair to get so frustrated with her just because she was concerned about me, but I couldn't help it. Every time she or my Father showed concern for me, I couldn't help but think back to when I was six. Where was the concern for my well-being when they offered me up as a way to clear their fucking debt, huh? Where was the love back then?

Some part of me knew I should forgive them now. Let the past be the past. I just couldn't bring myself to.

When the groceries were packed, I left the kitchen and grabbed a cigar from my study, lighting it up and enjoying the smooth flavor of it while my Mother laid down on the couch and exhaled deeply in a limp sigh. I'm sure she was exhausted. She worked hard enough for five ponies, if only so she wouldn't have to face me. I was at least merciful in that regard.

"I'm going to be getting my own place sometime soon. Gonna move out," I told her, glancing in her direction for any reaction. "Figured it was about time."

She gave me an appraising look, eyes darting over the features of my face before looking down at the floor. "If you feel that's what's best, Twilight. This is the Sparkle household though. You don't have to move out if you don't want to."

"Please. We're toxic to each other," I said, waving it off. "I would like to be able to consider staying home some nights without worrying about having to deal with you or Dad. Or both."

I saw her cringe at how harshly I was putting it, but it was just the truth. I hated dealing with them just as much as they didn't like having to put up with my disgust towards them. At least this way, neither of us would have to suffer the presence of the other.

"...What will we say to Shining?" she asked, shifting to a sitting position.

"I'm a free spirit, and I want my own house. Simple as that."

She seemed to be considering the whole thing, not that she really had any choice in the matter. Neither did I, if I was being honest. I needed better privacy for what I had planned, and I wouldn't be able to guarantee that kind of privacy sticking around that house. Spike would still be a concern, but I had plans to deal with that as well.

Long story short, she went along with my plans, and made a point of going to her room to relax. All the better for me, since I planned to go out. I took some painkillers and fished out some casual wear for a day on the town, but now that it was mid-day, I had to kill some time. Relax, enjoy some Canterlotian cuisine, speak with a few of the nobles I passed by on the streets...that sort of thing. Though I can guarantee you, they were judging me for my street wear, while at the same time fawning over my injury. Acting like I was some dainty, helpless filly...very annoying.

When the sun began to lower over the horizon, I headed straight through the Red District to a poorer location deeper within the bowels of the city. My destination was a decently-sized, ramshackle-looking abandoned building wedged between what used to be two factories. Inside of it, however, was a very different story.

I knocked three times in quick succession on the door, then a firm fourth time, and waited. The instructions for the special knock weren't given, but if Shady was there, he'd probably recognize it. If he wasn't there, well...it'd just be Gadget.

I could hear hooves clopping against the floor on the inside, walking right up to the door. A rapid series of six knocks responded to mine, and I knocked once at the top of the door, once close to the bottom, then quickly once to the left and the right in succession. There was a pause, and a few seconds later, the latches on the door were flipped and the old rickety thing creaked noisily as it was pulled open.

"Really, Shady? Is this just a thing with you now?"

I found myself looking down the barrel of a shotgun, and Shady was standing at the other end of it on his hindlegs, braced and ready to fire if he needed to.

"Can't be too careful. You know how it is," he said, turning the shotgun away from my face and stepping aside. "C'mon in."

"I swear, you remind me of a homesteader that doesn't want some zebra getting sweet on his daughter..." I muttered, walking inside and shutting the door behind myself. "Don't be reasonable, just stick a gun in their face and hope it all works out."

"Hey, if it works, it works," he said with a shrug, propping the shotgun against the wall next to the door. "Nice t' see ya, Twitchy."

I smiled at him and looked him over. "Nice to see you too! I wasn't sure if you'd show."

"Eh, I figured I owed you one. One Tartarus of a way to cash in on me though," he said, pointing to a door at the far end of the fairly decrepit-looking room. "Your new employee's in the back catchin' a nap."

"Please tell me you didn't stick a gun in her face too."

"Well, I won't tell ya then."

"Smartass."

I stepped into the safehouse proper once I passed through the doorway Shady pointed out. The inside of the safehouse had a very old and lived-in feel to it, despite a lot of the furniture looking new enough due to the lack of use it got after I got out of the game. Plain beige sheets on the beds lining the far wall, several lockers and side rooms to store things and give my people their privacy if they need it, a radio, a ton of old unused wires and electronics equipment piled in the corner from back when I had a minotaur that worked for me...lots of things. Even the paint job given to the walls looked chipped and worn.

I immediately tried to remember whether or not that paint was heavily lead-based or not. Then I opted to re-paint this place when no one was around. Fuck that noise, I wasn't going to take that kind of risk!

Gadget was laid out on one of the beds on her back, her semi-noisy snoring somehow cute despite the big, massive size that she was. The bed was actually kinda small for her. I wonder why she didn't take one of the side rooms? Eh well.

I felt a spark of mischief as I looked her over, hindlegs obscenely splayed out and forelegs twitching against her chest. Her ears twitched just the same on occasion, and I looked over to Shady before making a shushing motion to him. I snuck up alongside the bed and leaned in until I was mere inches from her ear, grinning to myself. I had to get myself into the mindset....

"Ahn! Oh, fuck baby, do me harder! Harder! Mmmnn-AAH~!" I moaned out loudly into her ear, deliberately playing up the role.

Her reaction was immediate. She snorted and jolted up in bed before flopping back down, her head hitting the pillow while her eyes darted this way and that, trying to find the source of the loud and rather erotic noise. The moment she turned her head to look at me, only inches away from her muzzle, she jerked back and almost fell clean out of the bed.

"Gah, what the fuck?! Canterlot?!" she blurted, rolling the rest of the way off of the bed and landing on her hooves. "What in Tartarus was that about?"

I stood up straight and shrugged, pulling my cigar case out. "Welcome back to the waking world. You actually used that nickname right when you woke up. I'm impressed it's so ingrained already."

"Yeah, well...what was that about?" she asked, walking out from around the bed with a yawn.

I pulled my cigar from earlier out of the case and re-lit it. "Simple. You're both working for me now, so it's time you both heard what your jobs are."

That got their attention real quick. Gadget seemed to rouse from her drowsiness in seconds while Shady's more casual smile faded in favor of a more neutral, hardened look. Game time, I suppose.

"Shady, your job is to travel around Equestria investigating local gangs in the larger cities and smaller towns. I want to know about every last one of them," I told him, taking a puff of my cigar and blowing it out slowly. "Don't engage them, but gather information on them. Who's in charge, who answers to who, who's fucking who. Every bit of info is something I can assuredly use to make them join up with us."

"Got it," he said, adjusting his jacket a little. "Why go after the gangs though?"

"Because a lot of gangs out there don't much like how the Mafia runs things. They also don't like the fact that the Mafia pretty much has a monopoly on criminal activities large and small. There have to be plenty of them that're prepared to throw down, if only because they're young and stupid."

"This could take me months. You know that, right?" he asked, walking over to the far wall to pick up his favored rifle.

"I'm predicting years, actually. Or maybe just a year," I mused, taking another puff of my cigar. "Take it at your own pace, but try not to linger in any one place too long. Call me whenever you enter and leave any city or town, and report any new findings to me as often as you can."

"Got it. You want me to start right away?"

"Sometime soon, but you don't have to leave immediately if you don't want. I do want to make some things clear, however," I said, looking between both of them. "This goes for both of you. No one can ever, ever, know that I'm the one behind this."

"Why is that?" Gadget asked, fanning her hoof at her face.

I frowned. "Because if anyone finds out, the Mafia will eventually find out. They find out, I'll wind up with concrete horseshoes at the bottom of a water reservoir. I'm good, but the Mafia...they've practically got the entire Magus in their pocket."

"Alright...what about me, then?" she asked, huffing softly. "It is very hot here."

"Really? Most say Canterlot's one of the colder cities in Equestria, being up on the side of a mountain and all."

"Yes, but I have never left Stalliongrad before. I just did not expect it to be this warm."

I gave her a quick nod. "Sucks for you. Don't worry though, there are ways to help with that, without forcing you to shave that thick fur down. It actually works great with what I'll be having you do while Shady's out traveling."

"Oh? What will I be doing then?"

"Simple," I said, grinning more. "You'll be joining the Royal Guard."

"...Что в Тартар?"

Chapter 23 - Introductions

written by Fire Soul

"Wait, why am I joining the Royal Guard?!" Gadget asked in an alarmed tone.

I stepped around from the bed and took another puff of my cigar. "Because it's a very poorly-kept secret among those of us that used to be of that kind of life that the Mafia has extended their influence into the Royal Guard. I need someone I can trust to keep an ear out and keep their nose clean."

"Okay...but what if they try to get to me, as well?"

"Loyalty will be rewarded, and betrayal will be met with a proper punishment. Besides, I have plans to keep you close by," I explained, smiling a little more. "Don't worry. I'm good at taking care of those that work for me."

Gadget snorted at me and frowned a little. "What am I, a pet?"

Rather than answering her immediately, I walked over and reached up, patting her on the top of her head. "Good doggy!"

Oh, the filth inherent in the look she gave me! I couldn't help but snicker while stepping back and motioning between them.

"I assume you two are acquainted by now?" I asked, pulling another cigar out and offering it to Shady.

He took it in his hoof and held it out so I could light it for him. "Yeah, we're all good. Could do without her bringing mares back to the fuckin' hideout, though."

"Oh, this again. I am staying here, I do not take suppressants, I am a hermaphrodite and you definitely are not my type, old stallion!" Gadget said, flicking her tail in irritation. "What do you expect me to do, go without for a whole week?"

"I dunno, get a damn hotel room? Jerk off in a corner or somethin'? Sweet Celestia, it's called a safehouse for a reason!"

"Not to mention, what kind of mare would come back to a dump like this with you?" I said, shaking my head. "In any case, yeah, you should've gotten a hotel room if you couldn't contain yourself. Bad doggy."

I could almost hear her gritting her teeth. Shady was occupying himself with enjoying his cigar, just the same as I was.

"Now if only I had a newspaper-" I began, only to get rather rudely interrupted.

"Yes, I get it, Canterlot!" Gadget snapped at me, crossing her hooves over her chest and sitting back, glaring at me.

"Ooh, touchy," I muttered, waving my cigar about in my hoof. "In any case Gadget, I need to know about your criminal history, so let's make this simple. Have you been convicted of any particularly heinous crimes?"

Her irritation faded in favor of a more thoughtful expression. "Not that I can think of. I have been convicted of robbery and petty theft, but that was a very long time ago, when I was maybe thirteen. There were some accusations of rape, but there were a lot of witnesses that knew what actually happened, so those accusations never stuck."

"Rape? What was the context for it? I'm assuming alcohol was involved."

"Ah, you know," she said, rolling her eyes. "Шлюхи get pretty drunk, get loose with their desires, and the next morning they wake up realizing they have fucked a hermaphrodite instead of a stallion, and they just cannot believe they would ever do such a thing, so clearly I slipped them something or worked some kind of magic on them. That sort of thing."

I nodded slowly. "Yeah, nowadays it's dangerous to pick someone up at a bar, though I'd argue you shouldn't be picking up mares that drunk in the first place."

"I formed a bit more self-respect for myself after the first few times," she said, walking over to an old sink on the far wall and checking to see if the water was running. It wasn't. "It was only three times that happened before I resolved to find better places to pick up mares. Never nailed a drunk mare since, unless I knew them from some previous hook-up."

"Well, at least you got wise," I said, motioning to the door. "Shall we, Miss Stud?"

"Eh, what?"

"There are certain requirements, though I can't recall all of them right now," I said, tapping my chin in thought. "I know you need some kind of residence in Canterlot, at least temporarily, in order to join the Canterlot branch."

"There is a branch of the Royal Guard in Stalliongrad. Why did you not have me join them there?" she asked, walking towards the door.

"The Stalliongrad branch isn't equipped for dealing with new recruits. That's part of the reason why you don't see a lot of Stalliongradi in the Royal Guard. Most of them can't handle the warmer climates the rest of Equestria has," I explained to her, looking over to Shady. "We might be back later, if we can't find her a place to live. If you're gone by then, be sure to leave a note addressed to LS."

"LS?" he questioned, quirking a brow.

"Lady Sparkle."

He grunted and gave me a quick nod before retrieving an old-looking hat from one of the beds. It looked worn down and dust-beaten, and I was immediately reminded of that old stetson Applejack wore.

Gadget and I left without any fuss after that. Out in the light of day, it was much more clear that she didn't take the Canterlotian climate all that well just yet. Her fur seemed a bit damp, and she was panting a little after just an hour of walking around. With her permission, we stopped and I took the time to weave a matrix around her barrel that made the air around us circulate faster around her body and through her fur. Believe me when I say, she was quite thankful for it.

I'd overestimated how easy it would be to find her a place to stay. In the end, she didn't have a legal residence, and I had no choice but to have her shack up with me. Unfortunately, that meant I'd need to delay the trip to Ponyville in order to get my own affairs in order and get myself moved out of my parent's place.

It took a few days, I'll admit. I had to take the time to sneak cement into the basement when no one was around and fill in that spare 'experimentation' room of mine, patch up any little hidey-holes I kept around the basement and my lab, move anything incriminating to the safehouse, that kind of stuff. Then it was a matter of finding the right kind of place to move into, and I had to take into consideration the fact that I needed to keep up appearances. That meant getting at the very least a very fancy two-story house, or more preferably a mansion.

Prices were steep, and I didn't really want anything particularly opulent...but at the same time, I wanted a place I could really shape into something uniquely me. Eventually, I settled for an old fixer-upper and had them start from the ground up. It was expensive, but when you're of the nobility, the banks are far more generous with their loans. It wouldn't take me too long to pay the loans off, after all my investments in Stalliongrad.

That still left the problem of Gadget's lodgings, but I figured having her use one of the spare bedrooms at my parent's home would be okay for now. The only real issue I had to worry about now was her lack of an education.

She was in utter awe as we walked towards the palace. The main thoroughfare leading up to the front gates of Canterlot Castle was packed with numerous shops, street vendors, and ponies dressed in rich tailored suits and dresses that probably cost more money than she could ever hope to spend, even on the income she made working at that arena. If nothing else, it shocked her to see just how clean and tidy the city was, outside of the poorer districts.

Funny thing is, what bugged her the most was not having snow under her hooves. She'd grown up with the sensation of icy-cold snow packing in behind her horseshoes and padding her hoofsteps to some extent, along with the squeaking crunch of a fresh blanket of the stuff, but here, it was just...noisy hooves clip-clopping against pavement and stone. She was the observant type of course, so it shouldn't have surprised me that it was the small things that got to her more than the heat.

The arrival at the castle was nothing special, outside of the guards seeming tense at the sheer size of Gadget, and the fact that outside of her groomed appearance, she was a scarred and imposing individual. Even if she totally hit on one of the mare guards on the way in. Gotta hoof it to that guard, she kept her composure until we were out of earshot. Whatever happened after that, I have no idea.

We were escorted to one of the closer meeting rooms before Gadget finally decided she had something to say.

"This place is unnerving," she muttered, tapping her hoof on the table we were seated at. "That mare did not even flinch. What is up with that?"

"They're Royal Guards, Gadget. While they have a wide range of tolerance for their candidates, only the best are chosen to guard the palace," I explained, glancing at the door as someone knocked. "Just try to behave yourself in the presence of the Princess, hm?"

"Yes, Mum," she snarked at me, crossing her hooves over her chest in irritation. Then what I had just said sunk in, and her eyes widened. "Wait. I am meeting the Princess?"

"Princess Celestia, yes." I said, opening the door and letting the servant walk in with a cart in front of her, a tea tray resting on top of it.

I could see the welling panic on Gadget's face, even as the servant began to set the tray on the table along with three empty teacups. "And you did not let me groom myself properly?! I did not even shower!"

"I assure you, she won't care," I said, leaning on the table while we waited for Celestia to arrive, waiting for the servant to leave before continuing. "It's not talked about much, but she spends a decent amount of her free time watching the guards at the training grounds. All musky and glistening with sweat...."

"...Oh," she said, glancing out the glass doors of the nearby balcony. "So she...?"

"Likes watching her ponies working out, flexing muscles and getting all sweaty? Yes. She'll never outright admit it to anyone but me, buuuut...yeah, she's a bit old-fashioned like that. Can't resist the beef," I said, flexing one of my forelegs with a smirk. "But, I didn't tell you anything. Got it?"

"Huh. Yeah, got it," she said, shuffling a little in her seat. "Do you think she would-"

"No, she would not react well to you hitting on her. Please don't."

"Hmph! Spoilsport."

I rolled my eyes and gave her a stern glare. "Try thinking like a pony instead of an animal? This is the Princess of Equestria we're talking about here."

"Your point? Everypony needs a good lay every once in a while," she said, tilting her head a little. "You do not think she went without sex for thousands of years, do you?"

"Of course not! I'd just rather not be the one vouching for you while you're trying to get under my mentor's tail," I hissed out at her, sucking in a breath between my clenched teeth. "I'm serious Gadget. Keep your loins under control. You're trying to get into the Royal Guard, now act like it."

She didn't have much to say after that, something I was thankful for. I'm sure she felt a bit insulted by being told to behave as if she were some kind of petulant hormonal teenager, but I didn't care at the time. I wasn't going to have a new acquaintance embarrassing me by offending my mentor.

Unfortunately, it took Celestia over a half-hour to find time to meet with us. That left Gadget plenty of time to wander the room, rifle through the drawers and examine random baubles and trinkets, do some...push-ups and sit-ups...hm. I felt rather warm suddenly. I had to dismiss myself and slip into the bathroom to calm myself down...and take a suppressant. I hadn't had my morning dose just yet, and I could feel the difference.

It was only a few minutes after I got out of the bathroom that Celestia finally arrived. By that time, Gadget was laid back on the floor, lower body on her seat cushion while she lazily flailed her hooves at the air. It was funny to watch all things considered, but inappropriate for meeting the Princess of the Sun herself. She did at least have the decency to quickly sit up once she realized who was entering the room.

Once she closed the door behind herself, she looked to both of us curiously. "I assume this is the one you spoke of? You seem to have gotten things in order fairly quickly with her."

"Well, I only asked her about it," I explained, motioning to Gadget. "Princess Celestia, Gadget Steelmare. Gadget, Celestia."

"Charmed," Celestia said, walking over and holding a hoof out to Gadget. "I must admit, Twilight hasn't mentioned you before today."

Gadget, to her credit, didn't completely freak out. She just sat there like a rabbit struck with fear at the sight of a timberwolf. Her eyes darted to me, then down to Celestia's hoof, then back to me again. I could almost hear her silent plea of 'What the fuck do I do?!' I suppose it would only be appropriate for me to come to her rescue.

"Apologies Princess, I didn't exactly prepare her for meeting you," I said quickly, cracking a smile. "With how suave she tries to behave, I figured she would've been able to deal with meeting royalty. As long as it wasn't Blueblood."

Celestia smirked at me and lowered her hoof a little. "He does have a habit of giving a poor first impression, doesn't he?"

"First impressions? Try all the impressions ever."

"Yes, everypony is aware of your dislike of him," Celestia said calmly. "Honestly I'm shocked that anyone among the nobility approves of you, with how vocal you are about it."

"Not everyone is eager to run their tongues over his perfectly-tended hooves. Not even among the nobility." I said, waving it off.

Celestia restrained her amusement, and instead directed her curiosity at my companion. Gadget, of course, was wide-eyed and seemingly awestruck at the presence of such a magnificent and otherworldly creature. That had to be why her eyes were consuming the sight of Celestia herself as if there were a belly within them just for deliciously beautiful images.

"I-it is an honor, Princess," she stuttered out, shifting nervously on her seat. "I am Gadget Steelmare."

"Yes, I believe Twilight said as much," Celestia said, smiling wider. "And I am Princess Celestia."

"Oh. Right." Gadget said, her face lighting up with embarrassment.

I couldn't help but laugh, and Celestia joined me. For how brief my association with Gadget was at the time, it was rather amusing to see her so...timid, I guess you could say? Celestia can have that effect on ponies, whether she wants to or not. I was just used to being around her, and I knew her on a more personal level.

"Oh, please do not be afraid!" Celestia said, walking around to take her own seat across from both of us. "Any friend of Twilight's is a friend of mine. Now, what was this about you wanting to join the Royal Guard?"

"Actually, that was my suggestion," I said quickly, holding up a hoof. "I mean all you need to do is give her a once-over and you can tell she'd make a good guard."

"Or a police officer. Very imposing size outside of Stalliongrad. Still, I see what you mean," Celestia said, turning her attention on Gadget. "What do you think of this idea?"

Gadget seemed apprehensive about answering, probably because we hadn't discussed this very much, but I had faith in her ability to play along. She did well enough in Stalliongrad dealing with the police, surely she could handle this?

"Well, it had me nervous at first," she said, shuffling her forehooves on the cushion under herself. "But, Twilight made a good case. Plus, it would be nice to get away from Stalliongrad for once."

"Bad memories?" Celestia asked, her magic going to work on the tea.

"Something like that," she said, looking to the tea kettle as it began to whistle. "What kind of tea is it?"

"I'm not sure!" Celestia said, smiling a little. "My servants tend to serve whatever kind of tea they wish. I enjoy the surprise, though they know my general preferences."

"Ah. I have only ever had tea from those little packets you buy in stores."

The look on Celestia's face was priceless, though it only lasted for a second. Her mouth hung open in silent shock, and her eyes went wide from such a horrifying revelation. To some extent I could understand why she reacted in such a way. I'd become spoiled by her vast collection of tea leaves and little quaint recipes from around the world, and when I tried to make myself a quick cup of tea late one night at home, I damn near choked on the stuff.

"You are a mare of greater constitution than I," Celestia eventually spoke, carefully pouring all three of them a cup. "I could never drink such disgusting swill."

"Ah, it is not that bad," Gadget responded, taking hold of the teacup in her hooves and having a sip. "доброкачественность....! The taste is...some kind of flower?"

Celestia took a slow sip as well, and hummed in appreciation. "Tai Guan Yin, I believe. Imported from Neighpon. A type of oolong, or Wu Long, as many Neighponese would call it."

"It is delicious!" Gadget said, taking another longer drink from her cup. "No wonder you could not drink tea you buy from a corner store."

Celestia visibly shuddered at the thought, while I picked up my cup and took a sip of it myself. This was good. They were getting along remarkably well, just because of their mutual enjoyment of tea. Perhaps if Gadget endeared herself enough, Celestia would try that much harder to get Gadget right where I needed her to be.

I took another sip of my tea and smiled faintly. "I'm actually surprised to learn that you like tea, Gadget."

"Well, I had to drink something with flavor, and I was not going to drink soda," she said, frowning a little. "Delicious as it may be."

"I can't stand soda myself," Celestia said with a small grimace, shaking her head. "I don't understand why so many ponies enjoy it."

I shrugged. "Some don't have the palate for it, I guess. Anyway, we were going to be discussing the Royal Guard, right?"

"Yes, of course. Let's clear everything up," Celestia said, setting her cup down and looking to Gadget with a small smile. "Your criminal record is acceptable if my student is to be believed, but what about your education?"

Gadget remained silent for a moment, which prompted me to speak up. "I...don't know the specifics, but she hasn't graduated high school."

"Ah. That will be a problem, but not one that can't be rectified," Celestia said, picking her cup up in her magic once more. "Miss Steelmare, are you willing to study for your GED?"

Gadget seemed to shift nervously in her seat. "I...never finished middle school, actually."

I choked on my tea for a moment. That...wasn't something I'd known, actually. I didn't think she'd flunked out of school that early!

Celestia's ears flattened when she heard that. "Oh, that is...very unfortunate, but it will simply require further study. Are you willing to study, miss Steelmare?"

"Er, of course..." she said, looking to me uncertainly. "Just how much studying are we talking about here?"

"Just enough to get your GED, and I think I can help you with that. I already home-school Spike."

"...Are you saying your son is smart enough to keep up with a high-schooler?"

I shook my head quickly. "No, but since I get to choose what he spends more time reading up on, I get to cut out all the useless crap that won't help him pay his taxes or make sound investments in his future. Did you know that modern public schooling doesn't even teach you how to make a budget for yourself? S'fuckin' disgraceful."

"Perhaps," Celestia said, waving it off. "But we have had that discussion several times. Best not to get into it again."

"Of course."

The three of us sat there for a time, Celestia and I enjoying our tea while Gadget seemed to sulk in her seat. Ears pinned back and everything while she appeared to be pondering on something. Celestia beat me to the punch, of course. She usually did.

"What troubles you, miss Steelmare?" she asked, pouring herself a fresh cup.

"Hm? Oh, nothing. Just feeling stupid." she said dismissively, picking up her teacup and finishing her drink.

Celestia gently set her cup down once more. "There is only shame in lacking an education if you do nothing to make up for it. Judging by your appearance, I would say you've done well enough for yourself."

"I suppose...." Gadget muttered, rubbing one foreleg with the other self-consciously.

"Of course the important question now is...do you want to do better than you've been doing?" Celestia asked, leaning against the side of the table.

Gadget sat there, glancing over at me a few times while thinking on the question. If you asked me, there wasn't really anything to think about, but then I had my own goals here. Not to mention, it wasn't like Gadget couldn't make a career for herself with the Royal Guard while she was working for me.

"You are a very intense mare to speak with, you know that?" she asked Celestia, downing the rest of her tea and setting her cup down.

"I've been told as much several times."

"You have a way of speaking, like...words within words."

Celestia couldn't help but grin. "And you are very perceptive for a mare out of her element! I suppose my student has an eye for talent. I'm willing to bet she came to the same conclusion I did almost immediately."

I perked up a bit at that. "What do you mean?"

"Her accent, and the fact that she's speaking Equestrian," she pointed out, taking a sip of her tea and looking to Gadget. "You're quite capable, even if you don't realize it or believe it."

The fact that Gadget was blushing from the praise said a lot. I guessed that she wasn't used to getting praise of that sort...or any praise at all for that matter. Then again, not many ponies knew what it was like to be praised by Princess Celestia, of all ponies. Even I'm not immune to it.

"You did not answer my question, my dear." Celestia said while holding her cup to her lips, a small smile hidden behind it.

"Oh! Uh, yes, yes of course," Gadget said quickly, her eyes darting to me for the briefest of moments. "Of course I would like to do better."

"Excellent! Then I expect you to have your GED in record time," she said, motioning to me. "With Twilight's assistance, of course."

I nodded in affirmation while finishing off my own cup of tea. I just couldn't down it the way she tended to, but then her constant habit of working didn't give her the ability to drink something whenever she wanted. Not exactly polite to be sipping tea during court, you know?

"I'm guessing she'll be able to enter into training with your approval, as long as she's working towards getting that GED?" I asked.

"Yes, of course. It wouldn't be the first time." Celestia said, her wings ever-so-subtly adjusting against her sides.

"Works for me," Gadget chimed in, shifting back in her seat. "Is that all, then?"

"No, unfortunately. This seems to be rather out of the blue, so I assume you don't have a place of residence?" Celestia asked her, her smile fading.

"Er-"

"Actually, she'll be staying with me until she can get her own place," I said, quickly interrupting them both. "We tried to look around earlier, but there wasn't really anything within her budget."

"You certainly seem to be dedicated to her, Twilight." she said, her eyes lighting up with mischief.

I decided not to play along. "She saved my life. Why shouldn't I show a little dedication?"

Unfortunately, Gadget was not of the same mindset as I. A few seconds later, I felt a thick foreleg snake around my back and suddenly pull me to my right. My forelegs flailed for a moment before I fell against Gadget's side, my eyes wide in surprise while she gave me a squeeze.

"Oh, you have caught us, your majesty! She tries to hide it, but she cannot resist me," she boasted, an overly dramatic sigh leaving her muzzle. "She will be the first of many in this town, I am sad to say. I cannot settle for just one!"

"Oh, goodness gracious!" Celestia gasped, a hoof moving to cover her muzzle as if in shock. "You are a prolific philanderer? And you have seduced my student? Oh, the scandal!"

"Ooh, yes, she cannot help herself," Gadget said even as I tried in vain to escape her grasp. "She is моя дорогая кобыла."

"She wishes I couldn't help myself," I countered, finally wriggling free of her grip, snorting and cracking a false smile. "She tried, but she wasn't getting anywhere under my tail."

Gadget hmph'ed and made another grab for me, but I ducked away. "She is very shy, your majesty. Do not mind her."

"Oh, I know. I've made my own moves on her, but she never takes the bait." Celestia said, faking a pout.

I couldn't help but feel my eye twitch. "But-you never-!"

Celestia's laughter cut in, as she seemed unable to keep her little game going any longer. Gadget joined in, and soon I was just a grumpy mare with her forehooves crossed over her chest, pouting the most epic of pouts. I don't know why I didn't immediately realize that Celestia was fucking with me, but I suppose back then even someone as used to her presence as myself tended to get caught up in the whole 'infallible Goddess-figure' thing she had going on. Despite being well aware of the fact that she was far from perfect.

"Oh, I like you!" Celestia said with a happy smile, her focus on Gadget. "You certainly have a sense of humor. Most that I deal with would be bordering on screaming blasphemy for you speaking of such things in my presence."

"Aww, I did not even get to make a 'hot for teacher' joke," Gadget said, faking a small pout. "You gave up too quick, Princess."

"You both can bite me," I said, snorting and struggling to hide my smirk. "Anyways. This'll all work out just fine?"

"Of course," Celestia said, her horn lighting with a quick snap of magic. A few minutes later, Swirling Breeze entered with just a few knocks on the door. "Swirling, can you retrieve the papers and documents necessary for miss Steelmare to fill out in order to join the Royal Guard?"

Swirling did as she was told without complaint, and we spent the rest of the time making small-talk until Swirling came back to escort Gadget out of the room, papers in tow. I was sure Gadget would get me back for it later, since she had no idea the stacks of paperwork she was getting herself into. I saw the stack once when Shining first joined, and that looked very unpleasant. Well, unpleasant for someone like Gadget anyway, someone that had never really done paperwork of any level of complexity before.

Celestia and I talked for a little while longer, but things felt...strained, somehow. While we still conversed, there was a certain awareness she had of what she should avoid talking about. It was bothersome to say the least. Still, it wasn't something I could confront her about. I knew why she was avoiding questioning me about anything. The less she knew, the better for both of us. Instead, we just talked about the more legal parts of my visit to Stalliongrad.

I left once Celestia decided she would check in on how Gadget was coming along. Plus, she needed to introduce Gadget to Shining Armor, aaand we may have failed to mention it sooner, but she wasn't aware that Gadget was a hermaphrodite that didn't take suppressants. While the guard didn't necessarily have an issue with that, it was unusual for a member of the guard to not be on suppressants if they were our brand of hermaphroditic. Throws their self-control into question and all that jazz.

Still, I was confident that Gadget could function just fine without the stuff. She'd proven as much thus far, and while she was very flirtatious and shameless, I'd hardly hold that against her as a sign of a lack of self-control. If anything, it'd just make things around here interesting...as long as she did her job, that is. So help me if she wound up getting kicked out because she couldn't keep her dick in her sheath....

In any case, I was just glad to finally have all that taken care of. There were other things I could've been doing, but after everything was said and done, I just wanted to go home and relax. Before heading to Ponyville, I mean. Spike had different plans, however.

Soon I found myself heading out on a merry jaunt to the comic book store, where I bought him a new comic in...some series he liked, I don't remember. Needless to say he got a new one every month for that series and despite his behavior the previous evening, I had no intention of depriving him of one of his recreations. Besides, if I wanted him to sit still on the train to Ponyville, I'd need something to keep his inquisitive mind occupied, right?

With his comic book bought and the day ticking by before our eyes, we ventured back home and began to pack for a short stay with our new friends, which I can assure you, he was all too excited about. I've already mentioned how most won't let him play with their children in Canterlot, so the idea of being able to go to Ponyville and actually run around with ponies his age? Yeah, he was more than eager. I was just looking forward to some down-time.

With both of us ready to go, we headed for the train station and bought a pair of tickets for a quick trip to Ponyville. I'd made the mistake of not getting certain phone numbers before heading back to Canterlot, so I couldn't call Applejack or any of the others to find somewhere to get myself set up for a time. Ah well, I was sure it'd be fine.

Author's Note

This chapter was kinda fun to write. Still, I'm more looking forward to the next few.

Chapter 24 - Changing Pace

written by Fire Soul

The arrival in Ponyville was nothing special. With Spike riding on my back and our modest amount of luggage in tow within my magic, we ventured into Ponyville in search of a hotel we'd be able to stay at. Little did I know that was easier said than done.

Ponyville was a strange place with strange standards, and one of those strange standards included the fact that the place didn't have a Celestia-damned hotel. It wasn't a place that was known for being a center of commerce, tourism or anything of the sort, so apparently no one saw fit to at least have a tiny hotel built here. I was willing to bet that Mayor Mare was in the process of getting one built lickety-split thanks to the whole Nightmare Moon incident, but for the time being, I was out of luck.

I had to make a decision quick, and I didn't intend for our first visit to Ponyville to end with Spike and I sleeping in the park. We'd arrived around mid-afternoon, and I'd rather have a place to stay before it got dark out. Considering I intended to get the phone numbers of my friends either way, I could knock two birds out with one stone. I didn't like the idea of just showing up out of the blue asking for a place to stay, but what else could I do?

Our first stop was Applejack's farm. She had the most space I reasoned, so she'd probably have room for us to stay with her. Considering Pinkie was living in a single rented room at Sugarcube Corner, she wasn't a great choice, and staying at Rarity's would really make it hard to avoid being in her way. Plus, I didn't think at the time she actually had a spare room.

You can probably guess why Rainbow wasn't an optimal choice.

The scent of manure was far more subdued, this time around. Then again, that was probably due to the sound of hooves bucking against trees in one specific direction of the orchard. The overall scent leaned more towards a distinct scent of red delicious apples, and despite getting something to eat earlier, I felt like I could stomach two or three of them with ease. Nobody grows 'em like the Apple Family does.

About halfway up the road, I noticed Big Macintosh outside, a distinct white wrapping covering his barrel and back. A very brief conversation with him, consisting mostly of eeyups and yups where applicable, indicated that he'd pulled a muscle while trying to pull the old rusty plow they hadn't replaced as of late. Yeah, I could see how that'd do it. Trying to till a field with a rusted and dulled plow blade? You're asking for a hernea. With that in mind, I think he got off easy just overstraining a few muscles.

He also told me that AJ was out in the western section of the orchard, being real stubborn about getting the work done herself. Sounded about right, though admittedly I didn't know her as well back then. Still, the 'stubborn farmer' shtick seemed very appropriate for someone like Applejack.

I followed the noises through the orchard until I ran across her, bucking at a tree that was half-picked as far as I could tell. Only a few of the buckets set underneath it were full, and the others just had a few stray apples sitting in them. Applejack's kicks were proving less and less effective as time went on, probably due to the fact that the longer I observed her working, the more her eyelids began to slide shut.

When I saw her standing still and her head hanging low, I figured it was time to make my presence known. Not to mention she was snoring in the cutest way! She was actually neighing every time she exhaled, like this wispy sort of neigh that made her sound like a little filly. Oh geez, what if she snored like that every time she slept?

"Applejack!" I called out from a short distance away, causing her to jolt awake. "You alright?"

"What?! Who's alright? Oh, uh, yeah, m'fine," she said, looking back at the tree she still needed to finish. "Just workin'. How 'bout yo-oh, wow sugarcube, what happened to yer face?!"

"Wrong place wrong time, no big deal," I said quickly, frowning a bit. "What about you? You've got bags under your eyes big enough to warrant a fee on the train."

"Wrong place wrong time can't be the whole story if'n your muzzle's so busted ya need a brace...."

"Have you read the newspapers?"

AJ shook her head slowly. "Nope. Ain't got time for it. Big Mac hurt 'imself at the worst possible time, so I gotta make up for it."

"Okay, first...you both do this entire orchard by yourselves?" I asked, quirking a brow.

"Eeyup! This is just Applebuck Season as we like to call it, so our workload's usually more heavy around this time, but when it's both of us we manage just fine."

"Alright. Second, with that in mind, you're willingly overworking yourself?" I asked, although I already knew the answer. "Seems like a lot for a single pony to do, I don't care how much strength and stamina you've got. Why not just hire some workers this season?"

"Excuuuuse me?!" she drawled out at me, rearing up and bucking the tree after taking a moment to align herself. "Ah told mah brother I could do this all by myself! You sayin' ah'm makin' promises mah legs can't keep?"

"Uh, phrasing, and secondly, no I'm not. I'm just saying that you need some help." I said slowly, in hopes of placating her.

Applejack hmph'ed and gave me a small glare, but it softened when she realized I had Spike on my back still. "Well, I don't need no help from nopony."

I sighed and shrugged a little, leaving it be. Drug addicts and stubborn ponies had one thing in common: you needed to let them hit rock-bottom before they even considered getting some help. Though, when it comes to addicts, sometimes they actually like rock-bottom, like pigs rolling in mud...eh, you know what I meant. Point is, I'd have to let Applejack wear herself down to the bone before she'd finally break under her own prideful hubris, and then I could convince her to get some help.

After a moment of silence, punctuated by hooves impacting trees, Applejack spoke up again. "So, was that it? You musta come here for somethin' aside from watchin' me work."

"Ah, well, yes," I said, rubbing the back of my head. "Actually, I came here thinking Ponyville had a small inn or hotel I could stay at. Turns out no such thing exists."

"So ya need a place to stay, right? Well, I could set ya up, long as yer fine with sleepin' outdoors." she said, pushing the buckets around and loading the full ones onto a nearby cart.

"Uh...whaddaya mean?" I asked, discreetly floating a few of the buckets into the air and out of AJ's sight, quietly setting them down into the cart so she didn't notice my helping her.

She took a moment to remove her hat and wipe the sweat from her brow. "Well y'see, the farmhouse is big n' all, but it wasn't built with overnight visitors in mind. Been meanin' ta build some additions to it, but this is the first year in the past three that we've had such a big quality crop. Might be able to afford an extension this time around, long as nothin' unexpected comes up."

"What about all your family members that were here during the reunion?"

"Pff, what, you think my family has problems sleepin' outdoors? Half of 'em do it without so much as a bedroll!" she said, hitching herself up to the cart.

"Makes sense, I suppose...still," I said, walking up alongside her as she began to move. "I'm going to ask Fluttershy if there's any way Spike and I can stay at her place during our visit. Not that your offer isn't generous given how unexpected our arrival was, but I'd prefer to stay indoors."

"Hey, no problem. It's not for everypony. If 'Shy can't put ya up, just c'mon back an' we'll get ya squared away in a good spot."

"That's all I can ask, really."

I walked with her back to the barn, conversing all the way about what happened in Stalliongrad. You know, without all of the details regarding my more illicit dealings. AJ really did look bedraggled, with how her tail was sagging and her head was hanging lower than it normally would for most ponies. Hopefully it wouldn't take her long to realize she'd bitten off more than she could chew.

"Sounds like quite a party ya had," she said, unhitching herself from her cart. "Good thing ya had that Gadget mare around."

"Mmmhmm. Might've been dead if she wasn't." I said, shrugging.

Applejack threw a bucket onto her back with a small grunt. "Where's she at now?"

"Joining the Royal Guard, actually. She's got the skills and the physique for it. It's just her magic that'll be a problem," I said, picking a bucket up in my magic. "Being a unicorn means that your physical prowess doesn't matter much in comparison to what you can do with your horn, and she's severely lacking in that department."

"Put that down." Applejack stated firmly, pointing to the bucket I had floating next to myself.

With a roll of my eyes, I gingerly set the bucket down...right next to the barn door. Applejack gave me the stink-eye for that, but she didn't say anything. Sheesh, irate farmer is irate when she's tired. Fortunately, her little sister showed up to defuse the situation before any harsh words could be spoken between us.

"Heya Twilight! Hey Spike!" she called out while running over towards us. "Whatcha doin' here?"

Spike was almost immediately waving and clambering off my back to greet his new friend. Considering how he had none in Canterlot outside of occasional acquaintances, his eagerness at getting to spend time with a pony his age shouldn't have been all that surprising. I guess by then, some part of me expected him to be entirely introverted since he spent a good chunk of his time with me or other adults.

"Just visiting," Spike said, flashing a sharp-toothed grin. "What're you doing?"

Apple Bloom pointed off past the barn. "Well, I was just gonna go n' cool off at the pond, but I saw y'all over here an' figured I'd say hello."

"Ooh! Mom, can I go?!" he asked suddenly, turning to look up at me.

I shrugged. "Dunno. Is that okay with you, Apple Bloom?"

"Sure! Uh," she said, reaching to tap on his shoulder. "You can swim, right?"

Spike spun around and nodded. "Yeah! Mom showed me how. She had to read up on how griffons swim to teach me. It was weird."

"Uh, why griffons?" she asked, turning to walk away.

"Claws." he responded, holding a hand up and flexing his fingers a few times where she could see them.

"Oh, right. So what's...."

Whatever she said after that faded into the distance. I was a bit miffed that they both forgot to ask if they could run off like that, but I had a reasonable amount of trust in Apple Bloom's ability to keep him out of trouble. I mean, she had Applejack for a big sister! Surely she was the responsible sort, right?

Still....

"...Spike'll be fine alone with her, right?" I asked as Applejack walked out of the barn again.

"Huh? Oh yeah, sure, he'll be fine." she said dismissively, loading another bucket onto her back.

"You sure? I mean I don't really-"

"Sugarcube, he'll be just fine! 'Sides, he's a lil' kid," she said, huffing as she carried another bucket towards the barn. "If'n he comes back with some scuffed scales, that's just him bein' a kid."

I took a deep breath and slowly let it out through my nostrils, nodding a few times. "Yeah, I guess you're right. I'm just not used to leaving him unattended like this."

Applejack walked back out of the barn with several empty buckets stacked together. "Don't tell me ya never hired a foalsitter for 'im?"

"No, I did! This is just...different, you know?" I said, motioning a hoof towards where the two had walked off. "Foalsitters are young adults. This feels more like letting him run off with nothing more than a peer watching over him."

"What, he don't got friends over in Canterlot or somethin'?" she asked, taking a moment to catch her breath.

"Not...really. Foals get a few scratches on their sides from a game of tag, and suddenly Spike's not allowed to play with them anymore," I responded, stamping a hoof against the dirt. "It's not fair to him. Just because he wasn't more careful with his claws growing up....!"

"Ah, I gitcha. Dragons ain't exactly common in Equestria. Plus they got those sharp meat-munchin' teeth and they can eat gems," she said, loading the empty buckets back into her cart. "S'pose I can see why they're afraid."

"So can I, and that's what's frustrating for me because I know he'd never willingly hurt anyone!" I said to her, clenching my jaw. "But they don't see it the way I do, and I can't change that."

"Eeyup. Anyway, I gotta get back to work. Nice talkin' with ya Twi," she said, heading back into the barn to get the rest of the empty buckets she'd carried in there. "C'mon back after ya talked with Fluttershy. You know where to find me."

I walked off back down the dirt path while Applejack wandered off into the orchard alone. I was admittedly worried about her current state, being as exhausted as she was, but she was a strong pony. She still had plenty in her before she'd give in. For now, I had my own affairs to get in order.

I still had our luggage in my magic this entire time. Honestly I'd forgotten I was lugging it around until I began wandering down the outer paths of Ponyville, trying to recall the way to Fluttershy's cottage. I had to stop at one house to ask for directions, but eventually I managed to find my way there.

She was already outside when I got there, a picnic basket laid out next to her in front of her cottage and...uh. Harry was dressed up in a moomoo. My brain needed a moment to process that, actually. Even now I need some time to really...comprehend. That's an image that sticks with you, and you'd best treasure it because it's unlikely many others have seen such an amazing thing.

Harry seemed to spot me in the distance however, and when Fluttershy turned after his gesture, I continued my approach. No reason to just stand by the path watching like some creep. As I got closer, I noticed that several other animals of hers were there. A few squirrels, a couple of small cats...aaand I think even an owl was there. They were all drinking tea. Did I take on the role of Alice without realizing it, and this is Wonderland?

Would that make Fluttershy the Mad Hatter? I mean, she already has her bunny companion, grumpy and prone to kicking ponies in the nuts as he may be....

"I didn't expect you today, Twilight! Um, do you want to join us? I'm sure there's plenty of tea..." she offered, motioning for a spot next to herself.

"Uh...sure, alright."

I walked up to the small table she'd set out and took a seat next to it. After a few of the animals made room for me, of course. It would be very unfortunate to wind up sitting on one of the squirrels, or heaven forbid, the mice. One of them looked like he was in a tiny-yup, that was an itty-bitty adorable wheelchair he was rolling around on top of the table.

"Did...did you make a wheelchair for mice?" I asked her, pointing to the mouse with a hoof.

She had a tea biscuit halfway in her mouth before she spoke up. "Hm? Oh! No no, there's a unicorn in town called Little Set that tinkers with tiny figurines as a hobby. I asked him if he could make a wheelchair for me, and he just, kinda...took off with it."

"How so?" I asked, tentatively picking up one of the tea biscuits while Harry poured a cup of tea for me. Surreal doesn't even fully describe that moment.

She took a bite of her biscuit and quickly chewed it up. "Well, I just needed a wheelchair, but then I started getting tiny stretchers and beds...I didn't have the heart to ask him to stop, but he did at least accept payment for it. He said there'd never been a market for that sort of stuff outside of very niche collectors. It was a nice change of pace for him."

"Huh. That was nice of him," I mused, turning when a claw tapped me on my wither. "Oh. Um...thank you."

Harry was holding the cup of tea out to me, carefully balanced on his upturned paw. I didn't think that bears could turn their paws upside-down like that, but it's not like I can remember everything I've ever read, so...okay. I carefully accepted the cup and saucer from him with my hooves and set them down in front of myself.

Once again, the thought of sanitation came to me. Mice were chattering together in their little squeaky language while sharing their own cup of tea, the squirrels were doing the same, not to mention Harry was right next to me. I think he was moreso there for the companionship than the tea. His big paws weren't exactly made for holding teacups, and I doubt a creature as big as he was would get much out of a cup of tea the way a pony would.

Mustering my courage against the plethora of bacterial sicknesses I might be ingesting, I took a sip from my cup. It was...not bad, actually. I was somewhat surprised that Fluttershy had some competence with tea. I'd expected to taste some of that disgusting instant tea Gadget had mentioned before. No, this was definitely brewed from tea leaves. I couldn't pick out the flavor though, nor did I want to at the time. I had other issues on my mind, such as the familiar white rabbit that hopped over in front of me again and gave me a once-over.

Flashbacks of the last time I was there flooded my mind, and I discreetly squeezed my hindlegs together on reflex.

Fortunately my tenders seemed to be safe from the little ball-buster, as he turned with a little wiggle of his nose and ran off to...I dunno, probably torture some other hapless victim. Not really my business anyways. I was far more interested in the fact that Fluttershy had scooted over at some point to lean against my side. I certainly wasn't going to turn away that kind of affection, even if a lot of her animals were looking directly at me now.

"So...why'd you show up out of the blue like this?" she asked, smiling a little wider than she was before.

I smirked and gave her a playful nudge. "I'm surprised you didn't ask about the brace on my muzzle."

"I read the newspapers," she said, looking to me with some concern. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine," I said dismissively. "Wrong place wrong time, nothing more."

"Oh, um, I know you're safe, but I mean...are you okay?" she asked, sitting up and moving her weight off of me.

I didn't really get what she was trying to ask me at first, as was evidenced by my owlish blinking. How are being safe and being okay two different things? That's not how it works on the streets, at least, not in my experience. We don't concern ourselves with psychological wellness. What, you can't take the pressure? Drink it off, you pussy.

Still, I could see why it would matter to her. She didn't know my life, she couldn't comprehend it the same way a pony raised on the streets could. She didn't know what it meant to plot and scheme and fight for your life. To someone like me, 'being safe' is the same as 'being okay'. To her, they couldn't be more different.

"Fluttershy, I'm fine, I promise," I said, taking another sip of my tea. "If I can face down Nightmare Moon, I can certainly deal with a surprise like that."

"But you could have died!" she said, tapping her hoof against the edge of the table nervously. "Doesn't that scare you?"

"Of course. But I didn't," I said, shrugging a little. "So I'm fine."

She looked down at her tea and turned the cup left and right between her hooves. "...It's that easy for you to dismiss something like that?"

"Mmmhmm," I hummed, setting my own cup down. "No reason to linger on it. That's how fear takes root in your mind, and then, well...next time I might not be able to get over my fear fast enough to stay alive."

Her eyes darted to me for a moment, then back to her teacup. "So either you're very brave, or you don't value your life as much as you should...."

"I'm going to let that last part slide because you don't know me," I muttered, scowling at the table. "But I'd appreciate in the future that you don't insinuate that I don't value my life just as much as the next pony. I have a son to raise, thank you very much."

I could tell from the look on her face that she wanted to say more on the matter, but after some careful consideration on her part in the silence that followed between us, I think she made the wiser choice. This wasn't exactly a 'tea party' topic after all.

After we both emptied our cups, she finally spoke up again. "So, uh, you never answered...."

"Huh?"

"What brings you here without any notice ahead of time?"

"Oh! Right. Well, it's kinda a perfect storm of misfortune and forgetfulness," I said, rubbing the back of my head. "I never got anyone's phone number before I went back to Canterlot, aaand I didn't know that Ponyville didn't have a hotel, so...."

"Oh, goodness," she said, barely hiding her amusement behind a foreleg. "So you came here and realized you had nowhere to stay?"

"Yeah, pretty much," I sighed, pointing off in the direction of Applejack's farm. "Spike's currently swimming with Apple Bloom, and Applejack's offered to put us up in a camping spot, but I'd prefer to stay in a house. My rich pony privilege is showing, I know."

"Sooo, you'd like to stay here?"

"That would be appreciated, but if you don't have the space, it's fine." I said, waving it off.

"No no! It's fine! I'm sure we could figure something out," she said hurriedly, shaking her head. "I mean, I don't have a guest room, b-but...."

There was a blush on her cheeks that I hadn't noticed before, and it only became apparent to me that Angel was paying particularly close attention to the two of us instead of...I dunno, talking to the other animals that were littering the table. The way he was letting out squeaking almost sounded like an attempt at words, too. Whatever he said, it certainly had an effect on Fluttershy. She lit up an even brighter shade of red and hid her face behind that luxuriously silky mane of hers while I just looked between them, confused.

"Uh...what'd he say?" I asked, turning to face her better.

She bit her lip and shook her head. "I-I'd rather not say...."

"Alright...what were you going to suggest then? Before he interrupted, I mean."

"Um...w-well, I was going to say that, since we already slept together, you could..." she muttered, shrinking in on herself more and more with every word. "...You could, maybe, sleep in my room? If you want to?"

I pondered on that for a moment. It wasn't exactly a bad deal, though admittedly I wasn't all that used to sleeping in a bed with someone else, at least, not in this sense. I certainly wouldn't be screwing around with her while Spike's in the same house. What if he walked in on us while I'm going at her and she's moaning her pretty head off like last time? That would require some explaining I'm just not ready to do for him.

"Sure, I can...I can work with that," I said, tilting my head to the side. "You were much more confident last time I was here."

"W-well, it was just, you were walking out the door and we-we hadn't talked about anything," she said, pressing her forehooves together and rubbing them against one another. "I didn't want to make things awkward or weird, and the last time you slept in my bed was, well...nice."

"Just nice?" I asked, smirking faintly.

Fluttershy cracked a bashful smile. "Really nice."

"Eh, I'll take it," I said, reaching into my pocket for my cigar case. "Actually, I've been meaning to ask...for such a shy mare, you seem really casual about what we did. You understand that we're not dating or anything...right?"

"Oh! Oh, of course I know that!" she said quickly, letting out a breath as she relaxed. "It would be kinda strange if we were. I barely even know you."

"Yet you were more than willing to take me to bed?"

"That's...that's different," she said, pouting a little. "A mare has needs, and she won't get them fulfilled by being timid. I should know, I'm timid all the time."

"Plus, we were drunk." I noted.

She giggled and nodded. "That too."

"So alright, I can just sleep with you in your bed," I said, taking note of how that seemed to make her smile more. "Spike can sleep in the living room?"

"Would he be okay, sleeping with so many small animals in the living room?" she asked.

"I don't know, but I guess we'll find out, huh?"

She simply nodded to me and stood up, quickly dismissing herself from the table before heading off towards the cottage. I did the same, though I doubted the animals could actually understand what I was saying. Then again, the way some of them looked at me when I spoke to them...eugh. It's still a bit creepy to me.

I figured that Spike was probably still having fun with Apple Bloom, so taking some time to relax and just spend some time with one of my friends sounded like a plan to me. The fact that my eyes were drawn to Fluttershy's flanks had nothing to do with it. Though I may have had ideas, if she didn't have anything else to do.

It would've been rude to just try to jump her or get under her tail right off the bat though. Admittedly I wasn't well-versed in this whole 'friends with benefits' thing, or having actual friends in general. I think maybe Fluttershy and I sped through step one and jumped straight into bed with step two by accident. That's alcohol for you, not that I have anything negative to say about the results.

"Thanks, by the way. For letting us stay I mean," I said as I walked up next to her. "Camping would've been fine, but...yeah."

"I'm sure Spike would've enjoyed it, but I understand. It's no trouble at all as long as you don't mind the animals." she said, pushing her front door open.

The lack of locks still astounded me in this day and age. How can anyone feel even remotely safe without locks on their doors? That was something I had to come to terms with whenever I visited Ponyville after that. At least the hotel had locks when it was finished. You don't realize how safe something so basic makes you feel until you just don't have it available anymore.

When we stepped inside, I had more of a mind to actually look around this time. There were small houses for various critters hanging from the ceiling, fairly out of the way in the corners with areas for the animals to climb down between them. A few mouse holes here and there, and I could only be fortunate that I wasn't a pony that really got creeped out by mice, a few small beds for cats and dogs...there was a lot to take in. Such as several pictures on the walls, clearly meant for decoration. One in particular sitting on the table next to her sofa caught my eye however.

The picture showed a group of three mares crowding around a single stallion, all smiles and hugs while a backdrop of Cloudsdale sat behind them. All four were pegasi of varying colors, and they all looked around the same age. I couldn't make out any of their cutie marks, but this photo was one of those far less common colored ones. Those things took time to make, and depending on how old this photo was, it could've taken quite some time to make.

The stallion himself, despite his rather enjoyable position, looked just a bit nervous. His mane looked as if it were coiled atop his head, the color being similar to Fluttershy's but more faded in intensity, that seafoam green color of his fur rather well-suited to the faded color of his mane and tail. He even had a mustache. The blue eyes really rounded the look out.

"Is this your family?" I asked, lifting the picture frame up in my magic.

She froze in place for a moment when she noticed the picture I was looking at, hesitation inherent in her features. She really wasn't good at hiding what she was feeling, at least when it came to fear or bashfulness. Something about that picture made her worry, which made me question why she'd have it on display in the first place.

"Oh, um, that, well..." she said, glancing off to the side. "Promise you won't be weirded out?"

I blinked a few times. "I promise. So, is this your family?"

"Um, yes. Before my brother and I were born," she said, pointing to the stallion. "That's my Father right there, and the mare just below him in the picture is my Mother. The other two are my stepmoms."

Her Mother seemed so young in the photo! Then again all four of the ponies did, now that I took a closer look at it. She had a very long and flowing rose-colored mane, something that I was guessing ran in the family if Fluttershy was any indication. She had a very pale beige coat of fur and lively purple-ish eyes, the dimples in her smile giving it a sense of genuine joy that made me want to smile as well.

I tried to figure out what Fluttershy meant. Two stepmoms? What, did her parents divorce, marry those other two, then reconcile? It was a stretch, but it wasn't impossible I figured. Wouldn't be the strangest thing I've ever heard.

Then it clicked.

"You're from a herd family?" I asked slowly, only mildly surprised.

"Uh-huh," she said quietly, taking the picture out of the air and looking it over. "This was taken when they were much younger. I didn't get to take a newer family picture before I moved to Ponyville, so they let me have this one."

"Oh. What was that like?"

"It was kinda strange, actually," she muttered, setting the picture down and smiling faintly. "But they were my family, and you know what they say. You can choose your friends, but family's for life."

"Ain't that the truth...." I mumbled, my thoughts drifting to my parents for the briefest of moments.

Fluttershy looked to me curiously. "What about you? What's your family like?"

"Mom and Dad are working all the time, and my brother's rapidly rising through the ranks of the Royal Guard, so he's not home all that often," I stated curtly. "Usually the only people home are Spike and I."

"Oh my. That sounds very lonely," she said, her smile fading. "I mean, you couldn't have had Spike when you were younger, right?"

"Yeah, but I traveled a lot when I was younger, and I was content to be left alone to study," I retorted, waving it off. "So it wasn't a big deal."

"You traveled around Equestria when you were a little filly? Alone?"

"Yeah. It wasn't so bad."

"O-oh, my. That's really dangerous," she said, scuffing the floor with her hoof. "I never could've done that."

I reached up and tapped the side of my horn. "It helps to be really good with magic. Never encountered a problem my magic couldn't fix."

She thought on it for a moment before nodding to me. "I...suppose that would be useful. You were good with magic even back then?"

"Mmmhmm. I still travel around here and there. Like my visit to Stalliongrad," I said, smirking a little. "You know I've been to Zebrica a few times? Wanted to learn their language, so Celestia suggested a few months of both immersion and study."

"How interesting!" she said. "Did it work?"

I cleared my throat and grinned. "<You tell me, lovely little pegasus.>"

"That's so impressive! I actually know how to speak Breezy, myself," she said, seeming to brighten at the very mention of them. "That was a struggle in and of itself! It was hard to find books for it."

I quirked a brow at her. "Speaking Breezy, huh? I guess I shouldn't be surprised by the fact that you of all ponies would be interested in being able to talk to tiny, fragile, adorable things."

"I can't help it if their pollen migration leaves them so vulnerable and I want to be able to help them if I can. It takes them right through Ponyville, you know." she said, faking a pout.

"Could that be because you are adorable and fragile yourself?" I teased, grinning at her.

She blushed at the insinuation, but there was a twinkle in her eyes. Something I hadn't expected to see from her, really. Not without vast amounts of alcohol in her system, anyways.

"I wasn't so fragile l-last time you were here...if you remember," she spoke so quietly, her face reddening with each word. "I-I-I was shocked you could even keep up with me. It was probably the cider helping you out."

I stared at her for a moment in surprise. "...Did you just insinuate that I wouldn't be able to handle you if I were sober?"

She shrunk back away from me for a moment, but there was a playfulness to it. The way she looked at me was almost catty, and the faint upward curl of the corners of her muzzle seemed far too mischievous to be unintentional. She made a point of turning to head into the kitchen, that long tail of hers flicking upward so the end of it batted me under my chin, sending a small gust of air over my muzzle. The faint scent of aroused mare lingered in it.

"Maybe."

I stood there, genuinely dumbfounded for a minute. She was far more casual about this than I initially expected! She was in the kitchen by the time I snapped out of it, a bulging sensation in my sheath forcing me to take some time to calm myself down and take a few breaths to keep myself under control. It certainly wasn't estrus, but that didn't change the fact that I just got a blast of horny mare scent straight up my nostrils. Any red-blooded stallion or herm would want to be all over that.

I'm sure if Gadget were there, Fluttershy would've already been bent over the kitchen table.

I stepped into the kitchen, watching her get herself a glass of water. "You know, for a mare that's so shy and timid, you can be very saucy."

"Yes, I know," she said, taking a moment to drink down half of the glass. "When you grow up in a herd, your perspective on things sort of...differs, from most other ponies."

"How so?" I asked, taking a seat at her kitchen table.

She sat down next to me and placed her glass down in front of herself. "W-well, for one, the idea of having multiple lovers never seemed very strange to me. It only seemed more normal to me when our neighbors got a divorce because they'd both cheated on each other."

"How so? I mean if they cheated on each other, they cheated on each other."

"Well yes, they were wrong to go having sex without each other's permission, but...if they both wanted more ponies in their love life, why didn't they just sit down and talk about it?" she asked, shrugging to herself. "Maybe if they'd had more ponies to turn to when they wanted attention, it never would've been a problem for either of them...."

I shrugged as well. "Maybe. Could just be that they were seeking companionship because they didn't care about each other anymore. Everything decays, and if you don't put the time into giving a relationship the proper upkeep, it just kinda falls apart."

"I guess," she said, staring down at her glass. "I just think it never would have happened if they'd had others as close to them as they once were to each other."

"So...that's why you're fine with having sex with your friends?" I asked, not quite seeing the relevance of the whole thing.

"Oh! Um, no, that's not just it, but it's how I started down my line of thinking," she said, sitting back. "The other reason is a friend of mine that I met around a year ago. She's a really free-spirited pony called Tree Hugger."

"Geez, what a name to give your foal." I said, trying and failing to hide my amusement.

Fluttershy giggled and nodded. "Hee, I know! But she's really nice, and very open with her heart."

"And her body?"

"Um, kiiind of. I spent some time with her last year during the summer, and she said a lot of things that made sense to me."

I shifted in my seat and rested a foreleg on the table. "Like what?"

"Well, she said that mares have lots of wants and needs to, and sometimes, a mare just has to go out and get those things she wants. Or the-the fact that, being slutty is just a viewpoint of society, and we shouldn't be afraid to share ourselves with the ponies we care about the most," she explained, then cringed. "Except with your family. She made that very clear."

"Well, I can't exactly disagree with her. She's lucky she can have that kind of freedom with herself," I said, snorting in irritation. "If I ran around doing that sort of thing openly, I'd be judged for it at every turn."

"Oh. Right, you're a noble," she said, frowning ever-so-slightly. "That must be hard for you, being a hermaphrodite."

I waved it off. "I'm on suppressants, it's fine. I can deal, and if it ever really becomes an issue, I've got magic and hooves to take care of the problem."

Fluttershy blushed once more. "And toys?"

"Not nearly as many as you, but yeah." I said, giving her a wicked little grin.

We sat there for a moment while she drank her water to cool herself off. I noticed her tail was swishing this way and that, her excitement finding an outlet through it. She was fanning her scent around without realizing it, and it didn't escape my notice. Suppressants or not, it was having an effect on me.

"So! Your friend, Tree Hugger," I said, perking up a little. "Does she smoke pot, too?"

Fluttershy coughed a little mid-drink, covering her muzzle with a hoof. It took her a moment to get herself under control, but when she did, she gave me a dirty look. I'm sure she didn't appreciate that, but it was too funny for me to care at the time.

"You did that on-*cough*-purpose!" she said, trying to clear her throat.

I just shook my head. "You can prove nothing."

She frowned and reached over to bat me on my foreleg. "And shame on you for believing in such stereotypes! Not everypony that believes in the things she does makes a habit of smoking pot!"

There was silence for a moment as we stared at each other.

"But yes, she smokes pot quite a bit. It helps her relax."

I snickered and tapped my hoof against the table. "Called it! Did you ever try any?"

"A few times, usually when she visits," she said, looking nervous. "That's not a problem, is it?"

"Nah. It's better than sticking needles full of heroin in your veins, and it's certainly better than smoking cigarettes."

"...Would you like to join us, next time she stops in for a visit?" she asked, sounding hopeful. "I'm sure she'd love to meet you."

I gave it a moment of thought before nodding. "Sure, why not? No reason not to."

She nodded to that and finished off her water, glancing at me just as the glass touched her lips to make sure I didn't try to get her to choke again before downing what was left. She seemed like she'd calmed down at least a little bit, and I wasn't sure if I should be thankful or not. How fortunate that I was wrong.

"So, um, I mean, sorry if this is too forward but..." she said, curling in on herself a little. "Do you have to pick up Spike anytime soon? Or did you have any plans for today?"

"No, not really...." I said, staring at her as she turned to face me.

"Then, maybe you'd like to...?" she said, pointing a hoof up towards the ceiling.

"Is that a proposition or a suggestion, miss Fluttershy?" I asked, slipping out of my seat and stepping aside.

She got down from her own seat and walked over to me, boldly nipping my ear and giving it a tug. "A bit of both."

I shuddered a little and felt the bulge in my pants getting bigger. "I would like to reiterate that we are not in a relationship."

"We don't need to be in a relationship to rut." she said casually, nudging under my jawline.

"I know, but you're being uncharacteristically aggressive about this." I said, stumbling a little as we both began to walk out of the kitchen and towards the stairs.

"Mares have needs," she said, nibbling at the side of my neck. "You don't have to fulfill those needs if you really don't want to, but I think you do."

She lifted her head and nipped my ear again, just the very tip of it, holding it in place while involuntary spasms made it try to twitch away from her teeth. I could hear her breath so clearly, and I could feel the warmth of her wing as it laid over my back, giving me the lightest of squeezes while her side pressed against mine. That bulge was becoming all the more insistent that I set it free.

"I'd really appreciate it." she whispered in my ear.

I stood there for a moment. Only a few moments actually. Then I stepped back, and she almost looked dejected. I think she thought that I was going to deny her. Then I turned my head sharply and nipped her right on her cutie mark, causing her to squeak and jump into the air in surprise.

"Up those stairs, filly." I demanded, smirking at her.

It only took her a moment to react, but she climbed those stairs far faster than I ever would've expected. It's always the quiet ones, I swear. I took a few seconds to get the time from a clock hanging on the wall before I headed up after her, a bit of swagger in my step. Nothing like a mare wanting what you've got to put some pep in your step.

In any case, I was hoping that Apple Bloom could keep Spike busy for a while. I needed time to make this pegasus sing. Mm, this vacation was off to a fantastic start...!

Author's Note

What a coincidence it is that I would cover the subject of Fluttershy's family right around the time an episode about her family is airing!

No really, I intended to bring this up since the start, this was all a huge coincidence. It weirded me out. :derpyderp2:

Chapter 25 - Heartfelt

written by Fire Soul

There's nothing quite like your dick being soaked in marecum after a deep, thorough rutting. The warm, relaxed sensation that had spread through every inch of my body made me smile as I rolled my head to the side to glance over at Fluttershy, the collar around her neck jingling while her chest heaved with each deep, exhausted breath she took. We'd both made good use of whatever we could get our hooves on from her little toy chest, and once again, several very exotic-looking tools of the carnal trade were scattered over the bed and the floor.

Mmm...lounging in the aftermath of sex was a good way to make you feel good about life. Well, with a pony you know you can trust, anyways. I didn't take the opportunity to really lounge that often. Different partners every time and all that.

"Hmmn..." I heard her groan, still panting as she rolled on her side towards me, snuggling up against me.

"That good, huh?" I mumbled, slowly beginning to catch my breath as well.

She responded by lipping at the fur under my jawline, her unpinned wing fluttering against her side and blowing a small gust over us. The cool air was more than welcome, and I used my magic to open up the window in her room. We'd closed it once we'd gotten upstairs so her little bird friends didn't come flying in intruding on us, but now we needed a breeze both to air out the stench of sex, and cool us off.

I mean we also closed it because she really has a set of lungs on her when she's getting fucked, but that's neither here nor there. Seriously, for how shy she may be anywhere else, in the privacy of her own bedroom, she doesn't know the meaning of shy.

"Definitely in the top five," she said with an airy sigh into my fur, giggling quietly. "Not better than Tree Hugger though."

"Ooh, I'm contending with a mare? I'd best step up my game and break out the sexy magic tricks next time then," I teased, reaching over to run a hoof along her primaries. "Or perhaps I should just make a point of studying pegasi anatomy to identify all the sensitive spots so I can turn you into a big pile of melted pegasus...."

She wriggled and sat up, stretching herself out like a cat that had just woken up from a long nap. "Maybe you'd like to preen me then? It's been forever since somepony else preened my wings."

"Kind of an intimate thing to suggest," I noted, sitting up as well and stretching out my neck. "Isn't that a bit much?"

"Having sex isn't intimate enough?" she teased, her breathing slowing down as she hopped out of bed.

"Point taken. Still, that sort of thing's usually meant more for...you know, lovers, and family?" I offered, my horn lighting up as I gathered all of the scattered toys into a pile.

"Are we not lovers?" she asked, smiling faintly and motioning to the bed. "Could you pull the sheets off too? We really made a mess, and I have some spare sheets in the closet."

I did as she asked, pulling the sheets off the bed and tossing them in a balled-up pile into the corner. "Well it's not that, it's just...it depends on what you mean by 'lovers', I guess. I'm not really used to repeat performances."

"Well...does that term bother you?" she asked, fidgeting a little where she stood.

"It...I mean, kinda?" I said, feeling rather sheepish. "I'm just not used to this."

She shifted a bit to get a better look at me, then stepped up and nuzzled my cheek with hers. "Okay...then what did you mean when you mentioned repeat performances?"

"I don't really have sex with the same pony twice," I said slowly, returning the nuzzle almost on reflex. "I'm clean, no worries there. I always get my check-ups."

She stepped back and stared at me for a moment. "You mean...not even once?"

"Well no, there was one mare a long time ago, buuuut...she got married, and we ended our little flings," I said, shrugging. "Never done that since."

"Well," Fluttershy started, smiling and pressing her head under my chin. "I don't plan on getting married anytime soon, so that shouldn't be a problem. Did you feel abandoned by her?"

"What are you, a psychologist?" I asked, tilting my head down and giving her a kiss on the top of her head. "Nah, never felt abandoned. She and I are still friends, in a certain fashion. I'm generally too busy to spend much time with her though."

"Aww, that's unfortunate."

"Eh. I've gotten along just fine without."

She looked at me for a moment before reaching up and cupping my cheek with her hoof. "You know, there's a difference between rutting and being intimate."

"Could've fooled me," I said, quirking a brow. "Sounded like we were being pretty intimate earlier."

"Maybe...." she whispered, leaning up until our muzzles were inches from each other.

I blinked a few times and leaned back on reflex. She caught that and threw her forelegs around my withers, holding me in place. The sudden shift in behavior was a bit unnerving, admittedly, but not...entirely unwelcome.

"Are you afraid of being intimate?" she asked so innocently, staring into my eyes.

"What? No, of course not. I just-" I tried to say, but she bumped her snout very gently against mine to shush me.

"Then kiss me. Kiss me like you mean it."

"Uh...what?"

"Kiss me. Kiss me as if I were more than just a friend," she said, smiling a little more. "Which is what we kind of are, already."

"What-" I tried to say, jerking my head back. "What are you trying to get out of this?! I already said we aren't a thing!"

"I know we're not. I'm fine with that. But I'm a very sensual mare when the opportunity presents itself," she said, squeezing her forelegs around my withers a little tighter. "So, kiss me. Or I'll kiss you. Which would you prefer?"

"This is getting kinda weird....!" I blurted out at her.

Instantly, her forelegs were gone, and she stepped back, giving me my space. Her ears were laid back and she looked...sad. Concerned, perhaps. I didn't know what to make of it.

"You are afraid...I'm sorry," she said, scuffing the floor with her hoof. "I didn't mean to scare you."

I took a moment to calm myself and shook my head. "You didn't scare me...I just don't want you to get your hopes up."

"Twilight. I don't want to be your mate or your marefriend or anything like that. I just want to be a friend that you can be...you know," she said, wiggling her backside. "Intimate with. Not just rutting, but intimate."

I ran my hoof over my mane, sighing. "I still fail to see the difference here."

"The difference is that one way, you take me to bed because you want my body," she said, smiling. "Which is a nice compliment, and I appreciate it."

"You're, uh...welcome?" I said slowly, tilting my head.

"But the other reason, that's what I really want from someone I get this close to. Not everypony understands that," she said, lowering her head in irritation. "They think I'm looking to be with them permanently. They're afraid of getting too close. It's such a problem with ponies these days...."

I tried to understand, but it wasn't coming to me all at once. I mean to be fair, it was a radically different mindset than what I was used to. Your average pony doesn't grow up thinking that getting fucked by your close friends is totally the normal and mentally stable thing to believe. It's all a matter of perspective I guess.

"I'm not sure I understand," I admitted, looking her over for a moment. "We need a shower."

"Yes, we do," she said, walking past me. "Come on."

I took a moment to remove the collar around her neck, then she led me into her bathroom and used her mussed-up wings to turn the water on, leaning in to test the water before stepping into the shower. I followed behind her and let the warm water rush over me, soothing vague aches I didn't even know I had after such a rigorous endeavor. In particular, the heavy pumping of blood had my muzzle throbbing a little, and I didn't notice it until after I'd spent a minute under the shower water.

Fluttershy and I took turns washing each other, hooves going wherever we wanted them to, brief teases here and there, but all good things must come to an end. We didn't say much while we were in the shower, aside from small talk about the goings-on in Ponyville, which I happily listened to. I was particularly curious about the bit involving the zebra, but I didn't want to press on it at the time. It felt too good to feel her hooves working soap over my back.

"This. This is what I want." she said suddenly, once we were out of the shower and toweling off.

"Hm? What?"

"This! This...closeness. Comfort in someone else's presence," she said, smiling widely. "This and more."

"I still don't understand." I said, running the towel between my hindlegs.

"Have you ever been on a date? An honest-to-goodness date?" she asked, setting her towel aside and spreading her wings, going to work on preening them.

"Can't say I have. It's never really been my thing."

"It wasn't for me either," she said, in-between running feathers between her lips. "So much caution and leading questions and posturing and trying to get past those walls you put up between yourself and others...I hated it."

"Not really surprising. You seem like an entirely different pony when you're not out in public." I said, setting my towel aside as well.

"Everypony does that. Even friends. Every time I look at ponies talking, all I see is the distance between them. Nopony's ever really open with one another anymore," she said, switching to her other wing. "But that's what I want to find."

"You want...closeness? Emotional closeness?" I guessed.

"I want friends that I can walk up to and kiss, and they won't shy away," she said, standing up after finishing her other wing, stepping closer to me. "I want friends that I can hug and they'll return it without hesitation."

I pulled back as she walked up to me, her chest pressing to mine while she planted a soft kiss against my lips. Nothing deep or drawn-out, just a quick peck on the lips that, admittedly, was quite pleasant. I looked down when I felt one of her forehooves curling around my own, pulling it off the ground and holding it in a tender embrace.

"I want friends that I can say 'I love you' to without them thinking I'm weird."

The way she was looking at me...there was so much warmth in those eyes. Beautiful, genuine, and unrestrained. Was this how her animals felt, whenever she took care of them? What had I gotten myself into?

Element of Kindness indeed.

"You really shouldn't love me. Save that for somepony that can give you what you want." I uttered, trying to pull my hoof away.

She tugged my hoof forward and scowled at me. "Don't you ever say that about yourself again! Everypony deserves to be loved, they deserve to be told they're loved!"

"But-!"

"No! I don't want to hear such...such self-deprecating trash!" she stated firmly, that warm gaze turning steely and determined. "Do you want to be loved, Twilight Sparkle?"

The question was so simple, but I had a hard time answering it immediately. It wasn't something anyone had ever asked me before, and it wasn't a question that I'd ever asked myself in all my years. A foalhood spent wandering, eating lonely meals, coming home to an empty house, no one to greet me...in that moment, it hurt. The betrayal of my parents hurt all the more. If it weren't for Spike, I don't know if I'd even know what love feels like. There's my brother as well, but he wasn't around hardly at all back then.

None of that answered whether or not I wanted such a thing.

"I don't know?" I offered, sounding entirely unsure about my answer.

"Well, either way," Fluttershy said, shifting towards me and throwing her forelegs around me again, hugging me tight. "I'm your friend, and I love you."

I didn't know what to say to that. I was beginning to understand what Fluttershy wanted, but I wasn't sure if I could really...do anything for her, in that regard. The way she was holding me was so foreign to me, despite the ways I often hugged Spike. There was intimacy here. Something warm and soft and welcoming laced with a hint of passion that made me feel happy and comfy.

I didn't have the heart to slip away from her. I just sat down and slipped my forelegs around her in return, hugging her close while she buried her muzzle against the fur of my neck. Her wings reached forward and rested over my withers as well, and that feeling of warmth only increased for me. I couldn't tell you how long we stayed there like that, really. Time didn't matter while she was holding me like that.

"You know...you kinda remind me of Cadance," I muttered into her mane, my face buried in that luxurious hair of hers. "Sweet as candy and wiser than most would expect for your age. Also lots of love-talk."

She just laughed and pressed against me more, humming pleasantly while we held each other. I could feel her every movement and every breath against my chest and my neck, and I had no intention of getting away from such a wonderful embrace. I felt light...at peace, for the briefest of moments.

"I want to feel loved, too."

She slowly let me go and stood up again, reaching for her brush and running it through her mane, looking over at me through the reflection in her mirror. I offered to do her mane for her, and she hoofed over the brush to me while I stepped around behind her, working the tangles out of her moist mane in long strokes.

"I want to feel warmth and intimacy from others, and receive the same in kind," she said quietly, smiling at me in the mirror. "But if this makes you uncomfortable, it's okay."

"...It does make me uncomfortable, I'll admit that," I said slowly, frowning a little. "But I'd like to understand."

"And why do you want to understand?" she asked, tilting her head a little.

"Because...I don't know," I said, shrugging a little and setting the brush aside once I was finished with her mane. "I want to make you happy."

She turned and gave me a long look, before grinning and planting a quick kiss on my lips. "That's all I can ask."

"I'd like to make you happy." I muttered, feeling strangely bashful.

What was I doing? This wasn't me. This warm fluttering sensation on the inside was about as foreign to me as eating meat. I wasn't sure if I liked it or not. I mean, I felt it sometimes with Spike, but not...quite the same way. I felt thoroughly outside of my own boundaries, and I was only hoping I wasn't making a mistake.

She grinned and walked past me. "Thank you, Twilight. I promise, it isn't as complicated as I make it sound."

"I sure hope so."

We left the bathroom and I made a point of taking the toys and the sheets where they could be cleaned. Turned out she cleaned both up in the basement. Probably the best place for the toys, all things considered. Or the bathroom. Can you imagine washing something you sometimes shove up your ass in your kitchen sink? Let alone multiple somethings?

When all was said and done, I got ready to leave. Two hours had passed without me realizing it, and like any good mother, I was concerned for the welfare of my son. Outside of foalsitters, I'd never left him alone with other children this long, and while Applejack could usually be taken at her word, that didn't change the fact that I felt worried. Fluttershy, however, did not miss the chance to grab me and pull me into a kiss before I left. A deep, sensual kiss that had my worries fading into the back of my mind until she released me.

I was not dizzy from the intensity of it. You can prove nothing. I was merely disoriented. There is a difference.

To say that mare can kiss isn't doing it justice. She has a way of moving and pressing into you and filling you with warmth that made pretty much everypony else I've ever kissed pale in comparison. It was a parting gift and a promise for later, I felt.

I walked down the path away from her house considerably more cheery than I'd ever been before. The moments after killing ponies like Charlatan Muse were different from this. I felt light and giddy inside, and in no time at all, I was back at Sweet Apple Acres just as the sun was beginning to set on the horizon.

I couldn't hear anyone bucking trees, so I went straight for the farmhouse. When I arrived, the door was open with only the screen door keeping the bugs out. I knocked on the doorframe, and Big Mac eventually came to let me in. He seemed to be avoiding making eye contact with me, not that I blamed him. He wasn't exactly the same brand of shy as Fluttershy was, but he really didn't much like to talk with ponies he didn't know very well. That and I'm still pretty sure I made out with him last time I was in Ponyville.

With a quick inquiry as to his injury and whether or not he was okay, he let me inside and led me into the dining room. I walked past the kitchen, where Granny Smith was cooking up something that smelled like pure deliciousness distilled into some paltry physical matter instead of the glorious abstract it once was. Apple family home cookin', nothing compares, I'd wager.

Spike was sitting at the dining room table with Apple Bloom, listening to her talk about life in Ponyville. A stallion in a distinct brown leather vest and a similar stetson to AJ's was sitting across from them, just staring out the window. I didn't recognize him, obviously. I figured he was just one of the farmhands, another member of the family.

"Hey Spike." I said when there was a pause in their conversation.

His face lit up as he turned to face me, hopping down from his chair and rushing over to hug my foreleg. "Hey Mom! Where'd you go for so long?"

"Just visiting with Fluttershy," I said, patting him on the top of his head. "Turns out we'll be staying there while we're in Ponyville."

"Aww...but Apple Bloom was gonna show me how to make s'mores!" he whined, hanging his head while letting me go and stepping back.

I looked between the two for a moment as an idea formed. "Well...it's not like we can't camp out at least once while we're staying here, hun."

"Okay...." he said with a small pout, tapping his claws together. "You promise?"

"I promise."

I didn't like disappointing him, but at least he was the understanding sort. We wouldn't be camping out that night, but maybe tomorrow. Maybe Fluttershy or AJ would want to join us? I wouldn't have minded Apple Bloom camping out with us. She was probably more suited for it than Spike and I combined.

"Well howdy there!"

I glanced over to the stallion again, who'd taken the time to remove his hat and set it on the table. The de-saturated color of his fur was almost a perfect match to Applejack's, though the two-tone mane and tail were distinct, an inter-mingling of his coat color and a softer orange-ish hue. Despite his scrawny appearance, he had clear muscle definition, more than your average earth pony. Not unexpected, since he probably worked on either this farm, or a farm somewhere else in Equestria.

"So you're this lil' guy's Mom? Ain't that somethin'!" he said, looking between Spike and I. "Ah was half-expectin' a dragon to show up!"

I turned to face him. "Uh, hello. I don't think we've met. I'm Twilight Sparkle."

The moment I raised my hoof more than an inch off the floor, it was grabbed between his forehooves and shaken a bit too vigorously for my liking. Before he could shake anything loose however, a spoon came sailing through the air, hitting him square in the side of the head. I jerked my head around to see where it came from, and it was Granny Smith, standing there holding an apple pie and a butter knife while Braeburn was cringing and holding a hoof against the side of his head.

She gave me an apologetic smile. "Sorry 'bout that, miss Sparkle. Some ponies just don't remember their manners."

She walked slowly over towards the table, and I could tell that her hip was bothering her. After spending many evenings walking home awkward on my bad leg, I'd come to recognize an off walk, and her steps were nothing if not shaky and labored. It didn't seem to slow her down too much though, as the moment she set down that pie, she turned on Braeburn like he'd just commited the gravest of sins.

"Yer mama raise ya like that, colt?!" she barked at him. "Ya don't go grabbin' ponies' hooves an' shakin' 'em up like they're a soda bottle! You best be apologizin' fer not treatin' her like a lady!"

He recoiled as if he were physically struck. Not just by the spoon, but by her words. His ears wilted and he seemed to shrink in on himself, a deep sense of shame etching itself into his features. I almost felt sorry for him, but at the same time, the way he'd been scolded and the way he looked now reminded me of a young colt that'd just been scolded by his parents for making an innocent filly cry.

"S-sorry, ma'am," he said after a moment. "Sometimes my excitement gets the better of me. Ma always said I had a problem with that."

I waved it off. "It's fine, Applejack did the same thing when she met me. My name's Twilight Sparkle."

He sighed with relief and nodded. "Name's Braeburn. Braeburn Apple, of course! Just visitin' from Appleloosa, checkin' in on mah cousin."

"Oh, so Applejack did that too, huh?" Granny said, scowling. "She's lucky she's off in the northern orchard right now, or ah'd tan her lil' bee-hind!"

Big Mac walked in with a plate of steaming broccoli, setting it down on the table. "Applejack's a grown mare now Granny. Can't be doin' that to 'er."

"The hay ah can't!" Granny stated with a stomp of a forehoof against the table. "Applejack might run this here farm, but this farm was started by my ma n' pa, an' what I say still goes until I'm six feet under. Ah'll tan her hide if'n I gotta! You best remember that, colt."

Big Mac looked like he sighed, but he hid it well enough. "Yes, Granny."

"Darn tootin'." she muttered with a 'hmph', sitting down at one end of the dinner table.

"Heh! Well, glad to see things never change around here," Braeburn muttered, looking to me curiously. "So, Twilight Sparkle? That mare that saved Equestria from eternal night and all that fancy horror?"

"Er, with a lot of help, yes," I said, just as I felt Spike climbing onto my back. "Ponies seem to keep forgetting that."

"Most papers don't mention it. They seem to like focusin' in on you," he said, taking his seat at the table once more. "A noblemare from a minor noble family, becomin' the student of Princess Celestia herself, then goin' and savin' the whole world when she's barely sixteen? That's headline news right there."

"They mention all of that? Talk about exaggerating how impressive I actually am," I said, shrugging it off. "So. Appleloosa? Isn't that one of the frontier towns down south? Like...two-hundred miles or so away from Las Pegasus?"

"One-hundred and eighty-three miles now! That town's growin' like a weed," he said, practically glowing with pride. "It's hard work, but it's comin' along."

"Yeah, it's starting to intrude upon buffalo lands," I muttered, frowning. "I'd imagine it's tough. They aren't known for their reasonable diplomacy."

"Don't I know it," he said, slapping his hat back on his head. "They keep tryin' to sabotage our apple orchards. That's why I'm here. Apple trees from Sweet Apple Acres are particularly hardy, an' we need hardy down on the frontier. I would've called, but...no phone lines out there yet."

"Makes sense. Not a lot of good soil to grow crops in the desert."

"Yup. Found a good spot in this new area we're expandin' into, but the buffalo are right ornery 'bout us growin' trees there," he said, leaning his weight on the tabletop. "They ain't been attackin' us directly, but I feel like it's only a matter of time. We don't know where they keep comin' from, and none of 'em will come an' talk to us."

"Yeah, that's buffalo diplomacy for you. Not that we have a good track record dealing with them," I said, grumbling a little. "Can't believe our predecessors treated them like savages...."

Braeburn snorted at that. "Well if they behaved the same way back then as they do now, it doesn't surprise me at all!"

"I suppose," I said with a sigh, running a hoof over my mane. "Best of luck with that."

"Thanks." he said, shuffling in his seat as Big Mac came back in the room with another plate, this time full of cut-up apples and other fruits.

Granny Smith looked up at us from where she sat, smiling. "You two wanna stay for dinner? Ain't no problem if ya do."

"While I would love to," I said, glancing back at Spike. "It would be rude for us to show up late at Fluttershy's when we could go get dinner with her instead. If she's not cooking something already, that is."

"A'right, sugarcube! Least ya got some manners about ya," Granny said, eyeing Braeburn. "Unlike some ponies."

"Ah said I was sorry, Granny!" Braeburn said, exasperated.

"Ya better be! Now, pick up that spoon an' help Big Macintosh out in the kitchen."

I took that as my time to leave. Spike said goodbye to Apple Bloom, and we headed out as the sun began to disappear over the horizon. It was actually starting to get darker out, and I could only hope we'd get to Fluttershy's before it got too dark. I'd left my luggage at her cottage, and all I had was my magic. Sure, that would probably be enough way out here in the countryside, or...well, the rural area of Equestria, but still. Once you get used to carrying a weapon, you feel a bit naked without it.

I knew that Ponyville wasn't like the big cities. Not even close. That didn't mean there weren't muggers out here somewhere, especially after this place got some publicity after the whole Nightmare Moon thing. Ponies that don't really lock their doors very often and walk around thinking they're completely safe? Any smart cutpurse or mugger would move out here within days to get some really easy scores. I could only hope Ponyville's police were ready for it...which they undoubtedly weren't.

When we got back to Fluttershy's cottage, it was getting dark and I could hear a television show playing from inside. Her windows were open to let the soft breeze in. I think I'd seen it before, but I couldn't put my hoof on the name of the show. She let us in when I knocked, but we didn't stay long. I offered to take her out to dinner with Spike and I, since it didn't look or smell like she'd begun to cook anything just yet, and she readily agreed.

So it was that two ponies and a dragon headed off down the darkened paths towards Ponyville, with the diminutive hatchling hoping they can get some ice cream on the way back. I didn't know any of the local restaurants, but Fluttershy pointed us towards a pretty nice place a lot of ponies in town went to late in the evening, but she was hesitant to go there. She didn't like the big crowds.

Instead, we settled for a smaller place nearby, just around the corner from it. The street layout of Ponyville was a bit confusing to me back then, with such wide streets lacking in sidewalks or any distinction of where a pony should be walking and where carriages can move. I suppose that's just rural towns for you.

When we settled into a booth and got our menus, Fluttershy began to talk more about her animal friends, at my insistence. I was genuinely curious, especially since she could converse with them in the same way I would converse with a pony or a griffon. Spike just wanted to know about all the different animals she had on her property.

It was pleasant. Peaceful, lacking in any sort of ulterior motive or hidden agenda. I could just sit down and talk with someone without worrying about my status as a noble, or whether they're planning on using me for their personal gain...I felt good. I felt happy.

I felt warm on the inside.

Chapter 26 - Awkward

written by Fire Soul

There's something to be said for falling asleep next to someone that you're at least remotely comfortable sharing a bed with. Considering I was more than willing to sleep with Fluttershy, it was that much better, especially since she was the cuddly sort in her sleep. Made getting up in the middle of the night to use the bathroom without waking her difficult, though.

Then Spike had a hard time falling asleep because a lot of the small animals were watching him through a portion of the night. Dragons can see better than ponies in the dark, not to any extreme degree like cats or dogs, but enough that he could probably see the squirrels and cats staring at him. So of course, as you could probably predict...it wasn't too long into the night before I heard him walking upstairs and knocking on the door to Fluttershy's room. The slow creak roused both of us from slumber, myself much faster than Fluttershy. I'm not the type to get caught off-guard in bed.

"Mom...can I sleep with you tonight?"

Spike stood in the doorway, looking between the two of us curiously. As I've mentioned, he's quite observant, and while we'd discussed how I'd have to share a bed with my friend, that didn't really explain why Fluttershy was all curled up with her head laying over my chest. She made a point of extricating herself from my person as quick as she could, but that probably just made us look all the more guilty.

"Why was she hugging you?" he asked, walking towards the bed.

"Oh! Well, um...." I began to say, still trying to get my brain going after being woken up.

"I, er, I actually have a habit of being very...um, cuddly, when I'm sleeping." Fluttershy said slowly.

I could almost hear the gears cranking overtime in her head. Her slow and deliberate manner of speech, combined with the obvious drowsiness, made it clear to me that almost every word just barely processed before she said it. I counted myself lucky that she didn't flat-out say 'Your Mom ate me out before bed, and that made me wanna snuggle up to her'.

Fortunately, Spike was more than accepting of that excuse, and since Fluttershy had quite the sizeable bed, there was no problem letting him sleep with us. You can bet that Fluttershy had some words with her animals the next morning though. They knew they were bothering him, and I really didn't blame him at all for being freaked out by it. Sleeping in a strange home, alone, surrounded by animals that are in reality just very curious about you, but they won't stop staring at you? Yeah. That's some freaky shit.

Waking up to see Spike captured in Fluttershy's forelegs with no way of escape was rather amusing, though. Especially when he started begging me for help because he really really needed to pee.

Fluttershy was a fairly heavy sleeper, as long as she wasn't jostled around too much. I found that out rather quickly, and that struck me as odd because I know I could never sleep easy in a house full of animals, kind or otherwise. It was pretty difficult to wake her up while Spike was in the bathroom, and she only roused when I poked her a few times and nipped at her ear.

The three of us took the time to make ourselves presentable. Spike checked his scales and brushed his teeth with us, then offered to help Fluttershy make breakfast. At least this time I could stomach some eggs, something a bit more substantial than toast and jam. No little rabbits hovering around stomping all over it either.

That didn't stop him from harassing Spike a little before I stepped between them. He wisely backed down after that. Perhaps he'd remembered the last time I'd visited, and he had no desire to get on my bad side? He was a spoiled brat, but at least he was smart enough to know he shouldn't be biting the hoof that fed him. Then again, I could've just let Fluttershy see him messing with my son, and it would've been back to the cage without his carrot once more.

With breakfast taken care of, I opted to help Fluttershy with her morning routine. She was putting Spike and I up in her home without charging, at the very least I could compensate her by making her daily chores go by faster. Spike decided to pitch in as well, right up until he found himself getting chased around by chickens and Fluttershy had to get them to leave him alone. Then she took time to teach him how to get the eggs from them and set their food out without them coming after him, but I also made a point to remind him that he had thick, strong scales all over his body and they couldn't possibly hurt him. Obviously, my reassurances did not ease his fears.

Fortunately, with the three of us working together, things got done fairly quick, and Fluttershy had time to catch up on her reading with the animals. I was going to take Spike into town for a visit with Rarity since she wanted to have tea, but he was more interested in listening to the story Fluttershy wanted to tell. There was something almost fairy tale-esque about seeing my son sitting there with a bunch of small animals listening to someone read Snow White and the Seven Breezies.

Since I had nowhere in particular to be, I took the time to find a nice spot away from where Fluttershy and her animals were, and I conjured up a construct to train with. I hadn't had much of a chance to really exercise lately, and controlling a construct as my sparring partner was the perfect chance to flex my brain alongside my body. I mean, outside of fucking Fluttershy into the mattress. I guess that technically counts as exercise if you look at it from a certain perspective.

I rose up onto my hindlegs and my construct did the same. I weaved thoughts, orders into it, and poured more magic into it to make it more sturdy, all standard for something that was meant to last beyond just a few hard hits. I gave it simple orders: fight me, and try to land hits on me. Nothing lethal, nothing long-lasting. I could have done more, but I was here to sweat and feel my body burn, not form a rudimentary consciousness.

Have you ever tried patting your belly and rubbing the top of your head at the same time? Try doing it while jogging, and you'll have an idea of what it's like to spar your own construct. While I had no control over the moves it made, I had to maintain my magic while ducking, dodging and weaving every jab and hook it threw at me.

We darted around each other, my magic fueling the construct as it stepped swiftly to my left and right, trying to get around my guard. It attempted to grab me several times, and each time I slipped away from it at the last moment, just before it could really clinch down on me, not that it would win in a test of strength.

By the time I stopped to take a break and catch my breath, I'd attracted a small crowd myself. Several squirrels from a nearby tree were standing up to get a clearer view of what was going on, and Angel was standing off to the side, staring at me in confusion. Most of them seemed a bit frightened even as I dismissed the construct and let it fall apart into nothing, but he just seemed...intrigued.

I sat down in the grass and quirked a brow at him. "What? Never seen a unicorn spar with herself?"

He tilted his head and squeaked a few things at me, then ran off to do whatever it is testicle-attacking rabbits do in their free time. No, I'm never letting that go! He kicked me in my nuts! There are things you don't do to male genitalia, and that's like...right there at the top!

I left my little sparring area with a light sheen of sweat on my fur and a warm burn in my muscles, though that last one was more than welcome. The sweat was just an unfortunate side-effect of my exercise. The ache in my hindleg wasn't very welcome either, and it seemed like today was going to be one of those days. The kind of day where walking was going to be a literal pain.

Well, I could go for another quick shower, and my hindleg could use a quick massage, so I headed back into the cottage to clean up and take care of that. By the time I was done, Fluttershy had put her story on hold so she could head into town and get some groceries, and she was apparently just waiting on me. Thankfully by the time I was done massaging my hindleg, it was feeling a whole lot better.

The trek into town was mostly accompanied by Fluttershy talking about her animals, once I inquired about them. Apparently Mister Nutty was having problems with his mate eating the nuts of other squirrels, and Fluttershy wasn't sure what to do to help them. Who knew that animals had domestic issues? I mean, I did know that, but the idea that Fluttershy could have to give advice to animals the same way you'd give advice to a pony, well...it's odd as well as interesting.

Once we reached town, Fluttershy and I parted ways. While I would have loved to spend the day with her, that wouldn't have been fair to Spike. I had several things I wanted to do, and the very first thing I needed to take care of was stopping in at Sweet Apple Acres to talk with Applejack about camping out. After that, well, I could either stop in at Rarity's boutique to have that tea with her that I promised, or I could take Spike to the park. Well, if I could get directions from someone.

See, I have a bit of a hobby, when I travel and even when I get bored and want to move around in Canterlot. I tend to wander and explore. Usually, I go to places that I at the very least haven't been to in a while, though I usually prefer places that I haven't been to or I just don't remember ever visiting. Small side streets, grungy ghettos...places where the real face of civilization shows up at. The nobles and the middle-class can portray an image of pristine beauty and better breeding all they like, but those dark places that the tourism boards don't want you to know about, they...they give you a dose of reality.

I suppose I shouldn't be so harsh. Allow me to correct myself: they give you a dose of their reality. The kind of reality where disease-ridden unlicensed hookers are common and going down an alleyway is either a death sentence or a guarantee of trouble. One or the other. Not to mention the drugs, a rampant thing that you can't possibly grow up on the streets without running into. It's sick, it breaks ponies down, it trains them into a certain way of thinking that guarantees that almost all of them will never rise above all the muck they're surrounded by. I should know how much it clings to you, I wade into it willingly.

With all that being said, Ponyville wasn't likely to have the kinds of places I could go to in order to 'practice my right to self-defense' against a group of muggers that don't know who they're fucking with. Unfortunately. I mean I suppose sight-seeing could be interesting enough just one time. Perhaps I'd find some things to do here instead of ponywatching and wandering around?

My visit to Sweet Apple Acres was met with a fairly lax response. Apparently Applejack was in town taking care of...I dunno, something involving Rainbow Dash and some kind of new stunt she wanted to attempt, and I guess she was helping Pinkie bake up some cupcakes for some kind of charity or advertising. Still, Granny Smith was willing to let us camp out on their property, and much to Spike's delight, Apple Bloom was more than willing to camp out with us. Shame she had chores, I would've been more than willing to let Spike spend time with her while I went to visit with Rarity.

The boutique wasn't particularly hard to track down. I only needed directions from Big Macintosh to get there, and it wasn't far from the central square of the town. I suppose being located on a main street makes sense for a place of fashion and business.

Rarity was busy working on a line of dresses when I showed up. Whoever it was, it looked like they'd ordered a fairly high-quality dress, judging by the fabric she was using. I'm no expert, but it was definitely silk, satin and jewels. Probably gold trim too, I think that kind of thing was in style at the time. What I didn't expect was to see an almost carbon-copy filly version of her sitting at a table on the far side of the room, working on her homework.

"Who is it-oh! Twilight!" Rarity said, turning away from the ponnequin she was placing a wide-rimmed hat upon. "How lovely to see you! And the little gentledrake as well, I see."

"Hi!" Spike called out while standing up and leaning against the back of my head and neck, waving in her direction.

"Hey. We stopped in for some time away from Canterlot," I said, kneeling to let Spike hop off my back. "So, who might that be?"

Rarity followed my gaze to the little unicorn. "Oh, did I not introduce you two? Yes, this is-" she began to say, turning to motion to the young filly and faltering mid-step. "-erm, my little sister. Sweetie Belle! Come say hello to Lady Sparkle, would you?"

The young filly perked up and looked back at us before hopping up from her seat. She seemed more than jubilant at the idea of getting even a small reprieve from her homework, and I couldn't blame her. Sure, I enjoyed that stuff when I was a little filly, but then I was one of the weirdos that thought learning was more fun than playing tag during recess.

"Hi! I'm Sweetie Belle," she said, holding out her hoof to me. "It's nice to meet you, ma'am!"

"Heh! You can just call me Twilight," I said, touching my hoof to hers and shaking briefly. "And this is my son Spike."

The little filly grinned and lowered her hoof, glancing in Spike's direction. "Oh, we met back during that big feast the Apple family threw!"

"Oh really? Spike didn't mention that."

"Uh-huh! We played hide and seek in the orchard," she said, grinning widely. "Spike kept getting the jump on us."

I gave him a knowing look. "Probably because it was dark and someone sees better than ponies in the dark. But you didn't tell them that now, did you Spike?"

He at least had the good sense to look a little ashamed. "W-well, no one said being able to see good in the dark was against the rules!"

"Uh-huh....?"

He stared up at me for a few seconds, before fidgeting and looking away from me. "I uh...I thought that if I told 'em, they wouldn't let me play." he said more quietly, taking a sudden interest in the floor.

Sweetie Belle shook her head quickly. "We wouldn't do that. It was fun! Remember how you snuck up on Pipsqueak and scared the life out of him?"

I watched his face light up in a wide grin, showing off those gem-crushing teeth of his. "Hee, yeah! He screamed like a filly before I caught him."

I looked over to Rarity with a playful smile. "My son the apex predator. Stalker of apple trees and hunter of fillies and colts."

"Truly, the most vicious of titles," Rarity said, looking to her sister with a warm smile. "Well, if you'd like to have some time to play, I suppose you can take a break from your homework. However, I expect you to come back and not move from that table until it's finished when Spike leaves, understand?"

Sweetie sighed and rolled her eyes. "Yes, sis."

Rarity gave a firm nod. "Very good."

"C'mon Spike! I got a new board game a couple days ago..." I heard Sweetie Belle say as she led Spike upstairs, out of my range of hearing.

"So!" Rarity chimed, taking a couple steps towards me. "What brings you here unannounced?"

"Well, I decided to take a break after that debacle in Stalliongrad, don't know if you know any of the details about that...." I said, reaching up to touch the brace on my snout.

"Yes, I read about it. I wasn't going to say anything, but that looks quite painful."

"Mmmhmm. So, since I was in town, I figured I'd pay you a visit and see if you were up for that offer of tea you made."

I watched the smile on Rarity's lips widen slowly. "Oh! Well, this is rather spontaneous, but I'm sure we could have tea. Please, er-"

She once again made to turn away from me, but for whatever reason, she thought better of it and just turned enough to motion to the kitchen. I stared at her for a moment, and she stared back at me, her smile fading just a little as a growing awkwardness welled up between us. I didn't want to make things worse, but I had no idea where this was coming from.

"Uh...okay?" I said slowly, walking up next to her. "Lead the way, I guess....?"

She fell into step alongside me, right up until we reached the kitchen doorway. Her movements seemed very deliberate, and the way she waited for me to head into the kitchen before her...it was all really bizarre. She wasn't like this when I first met her. Before, she was flamboyant and charismatic. Everything she was doing was just making the entire situation awkward.

Even as I took a seat at the kitchen table directly across from the door, she seemed to try to keep her side turned to me as much as she could. She used her magic to gather her kettle and tea leaves while taking a seat next to me, setting the kettle to boil after filling it up with water. At the very least, that was normal, but the way she was behaving didn't sit well with me.

My mind immediately went to changelings, but I'd need more evidence of that. For the time being, all I could really do was talk with her. She certainly had plenty to talk about, despite living in such a small town. Fluttershy wasn't kidding when she said Rarity was a gossip. I now knew far more than I ever wanted to know about the promiscuous rumors surrounding Mr. and Mrs. Cake, and that was even before the tea was ready.

The conversation itself was very reminiscent of how I had to deal with the nobility back in Canterlot, both in and out of the garden parties and soirees they often threw. In other words, the conversation was very boring. Gossip about Bon-Bon digging through someone's trash, Golden Harvest having a crush on Thunderlane, things like that. Meanwhile I'm used to merely putting up with hearing about stuff like this and pretending to be amused.

The entire time, Rarity seemed very much on edge. Even I could tell, with how her posture remained absolutely stiff and straight. She even avoided moving her tail as much as possible, which simply wasn't natural. Even the most well-groomed and disciplined among the nobility tended to begin to slouch and lose their perfect posture after just a few minutes, or take moments to relax their muscles before the soreness and tension sets in. She was making the classic mistake of trying too hard to act 'normal'.

After a while of observing her, I just couldn't take it anymore.

"Rarity, sorry, I hate to interrupt," I started, holding up a hoof to get her attention. "Why are you so tense today?"

"What?!" she said sharply, her ear twitching several times as she adjusted her posture once more. "I'm not tense at all. This has been quite enjoyable."

"Rarity, you were fine when I first arrived," I started, sitting back in my seat. "But once we started talking, you became very guarded."

"No I didn't," she said, sipping from her cup a bit more noisily than I'd have expected from her. "I'm just trying to present myself appropriately in the presence of a noble."

"Yyyeah, I'm not buying that."

She glanced over at me for a moment, then set her cup down. "Very well. I was trying to be courteous, is all."

I quirked a brow. "Courteous? About what?"

"Why, your condition, darling!" she said, as if it should be obvious what she was referring to.

"Um...my broken snout, you mean....?" I guessed, trying to figure out her meaning.

"What? No, no dear," she said, blushing a little and motioning down towards the lower part of my body. "I mean that. You know...."

I followed where her hoof was pointing, checking twice to be sure of what she was indicating. It only took me a few seconds to put two and two together.

"What, you mean the fact that I'm a hermaphrodite?" I said, clenching my jaw slightly. "You think that's a condition?"

"Isn't it?"

"What? No, it...wait, what does that have to do with you being so tense?" I asked, already having an idea of where this was going.

Rarity scoffed and flicked her mane. "Well, isn't it obvious? I was trying not to tempt you!"

"...You were trying not to tempt me." I said with a deadpan stare, my ears laying flat.

"Why, yes. I've read about how hard it is for ponies with your disability to control themselves when they get aroused-"

"Disability?!" I almost shouted, just barely keeping my voice in check when I remembered that Spike and Sweetie Belle were upstairs.

"Twilight, please! There's no need for raising your voice," she said, as if she were chiding a child. "As I was saying, I didn't want to make things difficult for you, else you might be inspired to do something undesirable."

"Whoa, wait. What's that supposed to mean?" I asked, a cold edge in my voice.

"Hermaphrodites have a very excessive and active libido, and it can lead them to lose control of themselves," she said, as if reciting from a book. "It is best to avoid putting them in a situation where they can be excessively stimulated in such a way, or else you may risk them trying to force intercourse to sate themselves."

I stared at her in mute silence. I was awestruck, truly and surely. To think that someone could be this stupid and presumptuous in this day and age shocked me to my core and made me lose just a little bit more of my dwindling faith in equinity. Surely if ponies like her were to one day be the idols of Equestria, our race was doomed from the start.

I'd read several books that talked about the things she was thinking of. Most of them were outdated and written way before psychology became a more well-researched scientific field. We're talking around a hundred years back. They were inaccurate, not properly based upon the scientific method, and were often written more out of personal observation and bias-borne lies rather than being based on solid experimentation and data gathering. Where had she gotten books that outdated from?

Then again, a lot of books studying the 'hermaphrodite condition' were just doctored re-prints of old books, so I shouldn't be surprised. Rarity had probably never even met a hermaphrodite before me. Despite this, she was talking like she knew exactly what she was talking about! Didn't help that Ponyville's sex-ed was probably atrocious when it came to a subject like hermaphrodites. Our educational system has a hard enough time teaching ponies about males and females, let alone the abnormalities that happen with ponies like myself.

"Darling? Are you okay?" she asked, concern tinging her voice.

"I'm...fine, it's just...wow," I tried to say, shaking my head. "Wow."

"Do you need something cooler to drink, to help you calm down?" she asked, reaching with her magic for a spare cup.

"Hah, no! Just, um...question," I said, clearing my throat and sitting up a bit straighter. "Rarity, do you honestly think you could seduce me to a point where I'd force myself upon you?"

"Oh there's no need to be ashamed, darling," she said, reaching over to pat me on my foreleg. "It's not your fault you can't be entirely in control of yourself sometimes. You were just born that way."

"Why don't you just tell a zebra he's a watermelon-gobbling, mare-abducting striper with more wrinkles in his brain than a basket full of dirty laundry?!" I blurted out, torn between the urge to punch her and laugh, pressing a forehoof to my head. "It'd probably go over about as well as this conversation is right now!"

"What?! How could you say something so tribalist?!" Rarity exclaimed, pulling away from me. "Sweetie Belle and Spike are right upstairs, what if they heard you say something like that?"

"I think you're missing my point here, Rarity," I said, taking some deep breaths to keep myself steady. "I know it's wrong, but I would love to break your face right now even though I'm fairly sure you're not at fault."

That got her attention. She immediately leaned further away from me, scooting her seat just a bit in the process. The light shuffle of the cushion alerted me to the fact that I was probably scaring her now, especially given her misinformed beliefs about ponies like me. Words needed to be spoken, rather than swinging hooves. Ignorance is the greatest enemy of intelligent minds, after all.

"Okay, let's settle down, and we can discuss this," I said, rubbing the part of my forehead just beneath the base of my horn. "First of all, everything you just spouted at me was blatantly and factually wrong. It was extremely offensive and I cannot believe you'd think I was some sort of rapist."

"Wh-pff-darling, I borrowed a very educational book on the subject, I think I know what I'm talking about!" she said, waving off my accusation. "I read the hermaphrodite section twice just to be sure."

"Okay, your intentions were pure and good, but you really should've asked me about what books to read," I said, shifting in my seat and taking a quick sip of my tea. "What was the name of the book?"

"I believe it was called 'Abnormals and You'. I thought the title was rather crude, but it was very informative."

I resisted the urge to slam my head into the table. "Rarity, that book is a re-print of a very old and very outdated book that was originally written over two-hundred years ago. It's so heavily based on assumptions about how the equine mind works as well as the body that it could be passed off as pure fiction in this day and age."

"That seems like a bit of an exaggeration if you ask me," she said, suddenly looking a bit more nervous. "That book was written by an esteemed professor!"

"Did you see the table of contents?" I asked, frowning. "You know that book also includes a section on homosexuals, and how they are 'deceptive disease-spreading sodomists that must be purged'? Are you seeing a pattern there?"

"I find myself questioning how you could possibly remember a random book's table of contents off the top of your head...." she muttered, her features slumped and a bit more downcast.

"I'm very well-read when it comes to my own body and mind," I stated quickly. "Psychology is a far more expanded field of study these days, and that professor was clearly bigoted and close-minded. There's so much more to the psychological state of a rapist, and it can vary from individual to individual, but generally there has to be something not working right in their heads to begin with for them to turn out like that."

"...So what you're saying is, that book is unreliable?"

"I still can't believe it got re-printed," I grumbled, shaking my head. "There are numerous books based on actual professional studies that are infinitely more informative if you're truly that interested. The only reason you managed to digest that book is probably because it wasn't held to such a high standard."

"I see...b-but surely you must admit, it's we-mmph," she began to say, stifling herself for only a moment. "It's...strange, darling."

"Excuse me?"

"Being born that way. It's...I don't know, something about it weirds me out," she said, wriggling a little in her seat. "I've never met a hermaphrodite before you, and something about the idea of it just clashes in my head. It unsettles me."

"...Ah." I said, trying to hide my irritation.

"And the way you were attracted to me in the Everfree, it...I don't know," she said, slumping in her seat. "I'm sorry."

"Well, I'm sure you'll be happy to know that you've rapidly become far less attractive to me throughout this entire conversation," I said quickly, snorting. "I think we're done here."

"Wait, darling, please, this went all wrong-" she tried to say, quickly getting to her hooves.

"No, it's fine, I'm weird to you, I freak you out, whatever," I said, heading out of the kitchen. "We'll talk again sometime. This has been really enlightening."

She rushed after me, jumping around in front of me. "Darling, please just wait! I didn't mean to-I mean-!"

"You didn't mean to offend me. I know. I can't even blame you for being weirded out. You said it yourself, you've never met a hermaphrodite before me," I said slowly, trying to keep myself calm. "But that still hurts, Rarity. I've grown up surrounded by ponies that think ponies like me are weird and unnatural. I didn't expect to encounter that here, with one of my friends."

It still felt weird to refer to her and the others as such. Even by that point, it hadn't fully sunk in that they were supposed to be ponies I could just chill with and let down my guard. At that moment, my friendship with Rarity was very questionable, no matter how dejected she may have looked at the time.

"I am so sorry, darling," she said, rubbing one foreleg with the other. "I can't explain why it's strange to me. It just is. The book though, it was the only one the library had stocked, I didn't know where else to look."

I stared at her for a moment, then sighed and ran my hoof over my mane. "I suppose you can't help what you feel. Just do me a favor and try to open your mind to the concept, alright? I'm not asking you to find me attractive, just...don't act like I'm somepony you have to walk on eggshells around, alright?"

She perked up a little at that and let out a faint, brief laugh. "Yes, I suppose I can try to do that."

"Good. With that taken care of..." I said, my eye beginning to twitch anew. "What do you mean that's the only book they have on the subject?!"

Chapter 27 - Chilling Out

written by Fire Soul

Now, I am a rational mare. A reasonable one. If you approach me sensibly and with an amicable enough demeanor, I am more than willing to sit down and have a level-headed discussion with you. If mistakes are made, I would rather spend my time correcting them than lamenting over them. That's just a sensible and stable state of mind to be in.

I was not feeling very rational or reasonable after I left Rarity's boutique. I used up all of that just dealing with Rarity herself. The library and indeed whoever was in charge of it didn't deserve Rational Twilight.

How does any librarian let this sort of thing happen? I mean I know Golden Oaks isn't the largest library in the world, but it's of a decent enough size that it should have sexual education covered if anyone actually wants to check books like that out! The only places I've ever seen Abnormals and You stocked at in regards to libraries is the Canterlot Royal Library and the International Library in New Yoke, and that's only because even the smelliest of book-shaped turds are still books that existed at one point. The fact that Golden Oaks didn't keep other, more informative choices around boggled my mind and pissed me off.

At least Rarity was willing to let Spike stay at the boutique while I went and paid this fucking shit-ass library a visit. Why that book, out of all the other more informative ones? I was happier than ever that no one outside of those five mares knew about my actual gender when that realization swept over me. How many ponies had gone in there looking for a book on the subject of hermaphrodites or homosexuals or transvestites, only to be led straight to that cowpie of a book? This peaceful town might be full of ponies that actually think I'm some disgusting degenerate, just because of what I'm slinging between my hindlegs!

Unfortunately, my wrath was sidetracked by what seemed to be some kind of incident happening at Sugarcube Corner. A lot of ponies in nurse's outfits were rushing towards it, with some orderlies carrying stretchers that were being used to cart ponies away from the establishment. It wasn't until I drew closer that I saw a lot of very sick ponies being offered buckets for them to vomit up their lunches with, and several others that hadn't been tended to in time had already done so all over the ground. Ew.

I tried to ignore the smell of bile as I drew closer to one of the nurses that was at least passively familiar to me. She was one of the ones that had taken care of me in the hospital, the only one I saw after waking up. She was as good a pony as any to start off with.

"Excuse me, what happened here?" I asked her, speaking up over the sound of retching and groaning.

The nurse turned suddenly, a medical mask over her face. "Oh! Here, we still don't know exactly what happened-how did you even-?"

I didn't have time to react as she yanked a medical mask from one of the sleeves in her apron and slipped it over my face. I had to resist the urge to scrunch my muzzle, and the barely-noticeable pressure of the mask pulling against the end of my snout caused a slight, annoying pain in my face. I still wasn't doing good with that whole broken snout situation, unfortunately.

I shook my head as one of the elastic straps snapped into place behind my ears, and gave the nurse a confused look. "What, is there some kind of airborne pathogen?"

"We don't know yet! How did you get past the quarantine area we've set up?"

I looked around at the fairly empty streets, devoid of any passersby. There was nothing but sick ponies laying on the ground and hospital staff rushing around the area, trying to figure out what was going on. You know, alongside checking on each individual pony and doing everything in their power to stop them from making the vomit even worse.

I pointed over to a nearby gap between two buildings. "I saw things happening, and came to investigate."

She followed where my hoof was pointing, then sighed heavily. "Somepony close that off! Look ma'am, we don't know what this is, and until then, we can't have civilians wandering around the area. I have to ask you to leave."

"Erm, I could help, if you needed help," I offered, motioning to myself. "I'm Twilight Sparkle."

"Yes, I'm aware, and that doesn't change anything. Please leave the same way you got in here, and watch where you step," she said, motioning to the puddles of vomit. "This place is practically a biohazard right now."

"Alright...any idea at all what caused this?" I asked, looking to Sugarcube Corner and taking note of the banner over the entrance. "Could it be food poisoning?"

"We're looking into that right now. Please leave, for your own safety, until we're sure."

I didn't opt to argue with her about it. I had other places to be anyway, and they had this under control. You know, looking back on it, I have to question why I always have this subconscious compulsion to stick my nose into business it doesn't belong in. Pretty sure I still have that problem. I removed the mask the nurse had given me once I was out of the area and tucked it into my pocket. I didn't have a trash can to throw it away in.

At least my anger had abated a little bit. I was less a burning powder keg just waiting to explode at someone, and more like...a grenade without the pin pulled just yet. This was fine, that was still a righteous enough level of fury for me to direct at the local librarian. I cannot abide a lack of knowledge when knowledge is so freely available. All that would have to be done is to take stock of the library's books, and then put in an order for newer inventory. Seriously, it's not hard! Half the time, you get new stock even if you didn't ask for it, so what the hay?

The moment I arrived, I took stock of the situation. The library itself seemed in good enough condition, even if the shelves appeared to be very dusty and unused. Even the spine covers of the books themselves looked dusty and untouched, the caked layers of dust having been left alone for who knew how long. It disgusted me on such a basic level that I had to resist the urge to open the windows and send a stiff swirling breeze through the place to try and get all that dust off.

"Oh! Two ponies in one month? That hasn't happened in a while," I heard an old, decrepit-sounding stallion say. "Welcome to Golden Oaks Library. How can I help you?"

I gave this old unicorn an evaluating look. He looked very old, the wrinkles on his body particularly reminiscent of Granny Smith, but even moreso, he seemed to have a lot of trouble walking. Maybe he was even older than Granny Smith? Then again maybe she was just ornery and didn't understand the concept of 'being old'. She certainly talked like she was in her thirties.

"Yes, hello. I am Twilight Sparkle, and I've come here because my friend informed me of something very disturbing to me on a personal level," I said as calmly as I could. "My friend Rarity borrowed a book a while back called Abnormals and You. She said it was the only book this library had on the subject of hermaphrodites?"

"Oh! Yes, that lovely young unicorn that stopped in last week," he said, smiling fondly. "It was nice to have some company at work. Yes, that's the only book we have on file about that subject. Maybe."

"Maybe? What do you mean?" I asked, swishing my tail impatiently.

"Well, we have a lot of shipments of books from Canterlot and Manehattan downstairs in the basement, but I'm nowhere near as spry as I used to be," he said, pointing to a nearby door. "Used to have an assistant, but since this library gets almost no use, they cut the funding down. He had to get a different job. I think the only reason this place is still open is because it's a historical landmark."

I could already feel my eye twitching. "You mean to tell me...you have the books, but they aren't stocked on the shelves?"

"Yup! Magic's not what it used to be though, and I'm certainly not strong enough to be cartin' boxes of books up and down the basement stairs," he said, sighing to himself. "What I wouldn't do to be young again...."

"Why haven't you asked for some help? I dunno, ask the mayor or something?"

He gave me an odd look, then slowly shook his head. "Well, this might sound selfish, but...I don't have a very good pension, and I need some kind of work to give my wife the kind of lifestyle she deserves. She's been good to me for forty years, and I wanna give her the best I can."

"What's that got to do with asking for help?"

"Because if I went to the mayor and asked if somepony could help me by just doing half my job for me, why would they let me keep it instead of hiring somepony more capable?" he said, cracking a smile. "Like I said, I know it's selfish, but this is the best kind of job I can do at my age. Used to be that my assistant would do all the stocking, and I'd handle the meet-and-greet with ponies that came in looking for books. Usually young fillies and colts, they get the most use out of the books here."

I felt my anger melt away as I looked around the room. Most of the library looked well-kept, but it was just the books that looked like they hadn't been touched in ages. He didn't deserve Rational Twilight, but I'd had time to cool off before I showed up there, and he'd drawn her out. I couldn't maintain my anger with him, even if he was being a bit selfish. I lit up my horn and pulled the door he'd pointed at open.

"Well, I can help you out right now, I don't really have anything better to do," I said, walking over and heading down into the darkness. "Just open all the windows for me, huh?"

"What? Miss, are you sure about that? There's a lot of books down there!" he called out to me from the doorway.

"It's fine, honest!" I called back up to him, looking over the numerous boxes that had been piled up in the basement.

"I-I'm thankful, but I can't pay you! You know that, right?"

"Yes, I'm aware, thank you!"

I marched back upstairs with every single box following in a line behind me. He watched me with no small amount of confusion, and I couldn't really blame him. I was some out-of-towner, a complete stranger, offering to help him for nothing. Well, seemingly nothing, anyways. I was getting something out of it.

It definitely took me a while to really sort everything out. I had to look over the books he kept among a slew of other things in order to straighten everything out. I could tell he wasn't used to having to keep track of this stuff. At least I knew how the Dewey Decimal System worked, or who knew if I would've gotten anything done in any reasonable amount of time.

By the time I was completely done, it was past noon and I really needed to check in on Spike, though I was sure he was just fine. Sweetie Belle seemed nice enough, and I had to get used to the idea of not constantly hovering around him. I didn't have to fear anything as long as he was around ponies I could trust. Well, reasonably trust. Rarity was a bigot, but she wasn't the type to be untrustworthy. The fact that she still kept my secret safe was proof enough of that.

With everything done, I was feeling much happier with the state of things. At least there were more books covering a certain subject that set me off to begin with. Far more informative books. I may or may not have made that copy of Abnormals and You disappear in one of the boxes I shoved back into the basement. Maybe. Possibly. I even took the time to re-organize all the other books on the shelves and give them a good dusting off. I had to use magic to whisk all the clouds of dust out of the library itself.

To say the old stallion was thankful for my assistance was an understatement. I had the feeling that he knew it was only a matter of time before someone went to the mayor or someone else in charge and complained, and then he'd be out of a job that someone his age could appreciate. He didn't have to strain himself, or rush, or anything of the sort there. He could just relax most of the day while still being on the clock. I couldn't even really blame him for wanting to keep such a cushy position.

With my anger completely faded away, I was free to pick up some lunch. Of course, I wasn't particularly hungry at the moment, but surely Spike was. I wasn't the type to get my lunch right at noon or shortly after. I can usually hold off until around one or two in the afternoon. I usually avoid big breakfasts as well. I have a bit of a garbage gut myself, you see, which is probably where Spike gets it from. Following my example.

I have never been under any illusions about my eating habits. While I maintain a certain level of decorum when I eat, I tend to get second servings. Then thirds. Sometimes even fourths if I'm hungry enough. There's a reason I've got a small belly on me, and hayburgers are entirely to blame.

I took a different route back to the boutique, and on the way there, I stumbled across Rainbow Dash pacing back and forth in front of what looked like a big, and very crudely-built, catapult. I couldn't help but question when she found the time to build it, let alone how she got it where it was, unless she built it in that very spot or something like that. I can't remember ever asking.

She seemed quite agitated at the moment, and she took to the air a few times to do a quick scan over the streets leading to and from Sweet Apple Acres. She hadn't seemed to notice me yet, so she must've been really intent on finding just one pony in particular. Worked for me, I was enjoying watching her get more and more aggravated by the second. Still, just standing there staring at her probably made me look like a creep to passersby, so I took the chance to approach her when she touched down again.

"So. This is a thing," I said, cracking a smile. "How's it going, Rainbow?"

She stopped in place and looked over at me, her grumpy mood disappearing instantly. "Oh, hey Twilight! Didn't know you were in town."

"Yeah, I brought Spike so we could come here and relax for a while, after my trip to Stalliongrad," I said, motioning to my muzzle. "Got a nasty souvenir."

"I heard about that from Fluttershy," she said, taking to the air and darting over in front of me, hovering just above me. "You good?"

"Long as I don't take a hard hit to the face, yeah."

"Cool. So," she said, flipping over onto her back on the air. "'Sup?"

I glanced over at the catapult. "I could ask you the same thing. What's up with that?"

"Oh, that? It's something Applejack's helping me with. Or she would be if she showed up on time," she growled out, clenching her teeth slightly. "She's kept me waiting for a half-hour now."

"Shit, that sucks. I was actually heading back to Rarity's to pick up Spike, but if you want me to make a run to her farm, I can do that. I need the exercise."

"Nah, you don't have to do that. Actually, you wanna hang out for a while while I wait for AJ to show up?" she asked, landing and walking over to a nearby guardrail, leaning against it. "I wanna hear about what went down in Stalliongrad!"

I thought about it for a moment. It wasn't like anything was really pressing me to rush around, and there were still plenty of hours in the day. I could do to just slow down and hang out. Besides, I rarely ever got to brag about my exploits, even though the version of the story I could tell Rainbow Dash was entirely fabricated. How terrible!

Indeed, instead of being able to tell her about my epic failure to sneak into Ruby's home, I was limited to telling her about how I stumbled across my 'old acquaintance' by accident, and went to Ruby's home with Gadget as an escort! I could not tell her about how Ruby thoroughly beat my sorry ass after disabling my magic and broke my snout! Instead, I had to settle for lying about how I was ambushed by some crazy pony out to get Ruby, and wound up blowing up a section of the building. Then Gadget picked me up and got me out of there before something worse happened.

Yes. Truly, I was the hero Equestria deserved.

"Wow. Sounds like you went through some shit," she said, rubbing the back of her head. "Thought it would've been cooler than that."

"Yeah, well, not everything in life can be an awesome action scene in a movie where I'm diving out of cover with pistols in each hoof and a flock of doves taking flight behind me," I said chuckling at the thought. "Shame, really. That'd make me look like the biggest badass ever."

"Where'd you get that idea from?"

"A film made in Neighpon called A Better Tomorrow. Really revolutionary for the film industry, it's fantastic." I said, pulling out my cigar case and flipping it open.

Rainbow shrugged and flicked her tail. "I don't really watch television. Don't even own a TV. Too many other things to do with my time."

"Oh, you'd love this one, trust me," I said, lighting up one of my cigars and taking a few puffs from it. "I mean, long as you don't mind reading Equestrian subtitles. Doesn't have an Equestrian-speaking cast."

"Eeehh, maybe you can show it to me sometime," she said, looking down at my cigar curiously. "So how are those things, anyway? I've seen ponies smokin' cigs, but the smoke just gags me. That doesn't smell bad though."

A wicked idea hit me, and I pulled the cigar from between my lips, holding it out to her. "Try it out for yourself and see. It's pretty good."

She stared at the cigar, seeming unsure about this decision, but eventually she took it for herself. I waited and watched as she pressed it to her lips, my expectations rising as she began to inhale. The end of the cigar lit up with a nice glowing orange-red, and I was already struggling to hold in my laughter. I knew this would happen from the moment she said she'd seen lots of ponies smoking cigarettes before.

Most people make the common mistake of assuming that you smoke a cigar the same way you smoke a cigarette. Even I made that mistake initially. It's long, it looks like a death stick, burns like a death stick, surely you inhale it just like a death stick, right? Wrong! You're only supposed to suck the smoke into your mouth to enjoy the flavor, and then blow the smoke back out. Rainbow Dash clearly did not know this.

I mean, you can inhale cigar smoke if you want, but you don't have to. In fact, I wouldn't recommend it at all. You'll still get that good, solid nicotine kick regardless. It is, at the very least, less of a death stick if only because you don't have to turn your lungs into a chemical toxin repository. That doesn't solve the whole cancer problem with your mouth or throat, but I digress.

The coughing and hacking fit began the moment she took that first inhale, and she made the mistake of putting those strong lungs to work and taking a deep one. Several ponies turned to watch as Rainbow doubled over and made the most desperate hacking and retching sounds, the cigar forgotten and dropped to the ground. I picked it up quickly in my magic while laughing my ass off, even as my friend looked and sounded as if she were dying right in front of me.

"Ghk! Hrrk! Y-you dick!" she rasped out, coughing a few more times. "Why do you smoke that stuff?!"

"What's the-hah!-matter, Rainbow? Can't handle it?" I teased, grinning. "Damn, I thought you were tough!"

"Screw you," she wheezed, slowly struggling to stand up once more, her wings flapping in front of her face to swipe away whatever she was smelling. "Ugh, it's in my throat!"

"Mmm, that's the smell of impending disease. Nothing better, huh?" I said, taking a slow drag and just as slowly letting it back out into the air above me.

She covered her mouth with a hoof and muffled a nasty retching noise. "Oh, sweet Celestia, I'm gonna barf....!"

I reached over and patted her back, turning my head to blow a fresh mouthful of smoke away. "Just take slow, deep breaths to clear your lungs out, and try not to lose your lunch. That'll probably just make it worse."

She was still wheezing as she tried to catch her breath. Must've been a mix of her lack of exposure and all that clean country air she'd grown accustomed to. She most likely didn't get exposed to much pollution in Cloudsdale either while growing up. They take air pollution very seriously up there, to the point that they've openly called cigarette and tobacco companies out, along with being very mistrusting of more modern technologies. I can respect it. Pollution is rapidly ruining Equestria's pristine and beautiful environment even now. I just hope Celestia does something about it soon.

"Guh...phew. Those things are disgusting," she said, clearing her throat. "I think I need to go to the hospital."

I gave her a smack on her withers. "Eh, don't be a pussy. Want some more?"

"What?! Sweet Celestia, no!"

"Then I did a good job," I said, taking a final puff from my cigar before snuffing the fire out and putting it back in my cigar case. "Last thing an athlete needs is to be eased into something that'll completely ruin her lungs."

"Guh, pthbleh! Whatever, that stuff's sick," she said, shaking it off slowly and coughing just once more. "Damn. Ugh, you suck...."

"Yeah yeah, I suck, I'm lame, whatever. Now, wanna explain what that catapult's for?"

"Whuh? Oh, right," she said, adjusting her wings against her sides. "I got that thing slapped together so AJ could send me flying."

I stared at her, then the catapult, blinking a few times. "Uh...huh. How exactly would Applejack send you flying?"

"I dunno!" she said, shrugging and cracking a confident grin. "I talked to her about the idea and she said she could totally make it happen! That way I can take off faster than I ever could on my own, and I can finally pull off my Rainbow Blaze stunt!"

"Yeah, you mentioned something about stunts before. What's that about?" I asked, crossing my forelegs and hindlegs over each other and leaning my side against the fence again.

"I never told you? I'm gonna be a Wonderbolt one day!" she said, grinning and spreading her wings wide. "I'll wow them with my flying skills and be a shoe-in! I practice every day."

"That makes sense," I said, tilting my head. "What about fighting?"

"Huh? What about it?"

"Uh, it's something you have to learn in order to be a Wonderbolt? They may be a showy branch of the military, but they still get the same amount of training as any normal branch of Equestria's Air Force."

Rainbow shrugged at that and took to the air again, checking the area down the road. "Yeah, but I figure they're gonna teach us that stuff when we join the Wonderbolts anyway, so...."

"Well yeah, that's true, but you seem like the type that wants to impress," I said, gazing up at the sky in thought. "I mean, you'd be hard-pressed to find a Krav Pega trainer in a small town like this one, but still."

"Wait, I thought they were taught CQC?" she asked, flying back down with a scowl. "AJ still isn't on her way."

"That sucks. Uh, yeah, they get taught CQC, they're specialists after all, but Krav Pega's the standard for pegasi in the military, and a staple of pegasus culture. You know that, right?"

"Pff-yeah, of course I knew that!" she said, casually waving it off and doing a flip in the air. "I know all about that stuff!"

I don't think I could've given her a more 'you fucking serious?' stare if I tried. My bullshit meter was flying off the charts, and I think she could hear the sirens from it going off just as much as I could in my own head.

She sagged in the air and hmph'ed. "Fine, I didn't know that."

"Mmmhmm."

She bounced back immediately, flipping over onto her back in the air and smoothly gliding in a circle above me. "But like you said, it'd be hard or impossible to find a trainer around here, so that's a no-go."

I grunted my agreement, and let the silence build between us, the idle chatter of passersby filling the air while we just kinda...hung out. Rainbow Dash kept darting between looking at the catapult and taking to the air to look around from a better position. I could tell she was beginning to get upset again because of Applejack's absence, but I was somewhat thankful for the excuse to just chill and hang with a friend.

"Hey, now that I think about it...."

I looked over at Rainbow just as she landed next to me. "Yeah? What's up?"

She grinned and motioned at me with a wing. "You know how to fight! Why can't you teach me?"

"Huh...hadn't considered that," I said, glancing off to the side. "Never really trained anyone before."

"Well I saw what you could do, and that was pretty cool!" she said, rearing up partially onto her hindlegs and jabbing forward with her forehooves. "C'mon! Show me some stuff!"

I gave it some consideration. There was nothing really stopping me from doing it. I hadn't sworn any oaths, and it wasn't like I was a stranger to being a teacher. I'd just never done any teaching of the more physical variety. Keep your minds out of the gutter for that one, damn it, I didn't mean it that way. Then again, my mind jumped to that immediately...geez.

Okay, my point is, I had never done that sort of thing, and I couldn't really tell you if I was qualified. I'd actually studied books about Krav Pega and several other forms of martial arts, but I'd never learned or practiced techniques from any of them. Not intentionally, at least. As I learned how to box, I tended to teach myself different things for different scenarios. Pushing and pulling targets to throw them off-balance, tackling them to the ground and slamming their head against the pavement...you know, dirty street tactics. Form and efficiency were fine, but sometimes you had to fall down to their level to make them learn.

I gave her stance a once-over, then shrugged. "Eh, why not? You'll have to work on that stance though."

"What? What's wrong with my stance?" she asked as she dropped to all fours again.

I mentally prepped myself to enter lecture mode, cracking a smile. "Well, us ponies aren't exactly naturally built for most martial arts, especially since outside of the pegasi, we aren't particularly inclined towards war. However, we've co-opted a lot of martial forms created by minotaurs and griffons, and even the pegasi have developed their own styles, such as Krav Pega. However, all of these require a pony to adjust to a very unnatural way of standing."

She tilted her head. "Yeah?"

"Mmmhmm," I said, rising up onto my hindlegs quickly. "Standing only on two legs. You need to get used to moving like a biped instead of a quadruped."

"Well okay, but why's that?" she asked, jumping into the air and spreading her wings wide, fluttering them to stay in place in the air. "Why wouldn't I just fight like this?"

"Simple," I said, reaching out with my magic and grabbing hold of one of her wings, forcing her to the ground again. "How easy do you think it'd be for me to make those go snicker-snap?"

I immediately let her go as she cringed and tucked her wings tight against her sides. "Oookay, point taken. It can't be that hard, right?"

Ooh, those are not the words you want to speak when you're trying to learn something new. Or ever, for that matter! You can think them all you want, but for the love of Celestia, don't say them out loud. You're just welcoming disaster upon yourself.

I watched her rise up onto her hindlegs, managing it for only a brief time before the natural order of things attempted to re-assert itself with particularly aggressive fervor. Namely, she began to lean too far back after only ten seconds, and when she tried to stabilize herself, she overcompensated and just barely caught herself with her forehooves in time to avoid getting a bloody nose. She rose up and attempted it again, and this time she completely fell on her back, her forelegs flailing in the air and her wings shooting out on reflex to try and catch her, but it was far too late to do anything about it. She hit the ground with a whump and a guttural grunt as the air was rapidly forced out of her lungs.

I walked up next to her and offered her a foreleg to help her up. "Look, while you shouldn't rely on your wings, you might need them to help you out. Slight advantage in the learning department over us unicorns and earth ponies."

She took hold of my hoof and pulled herself up quicker than I expected, rubbing the back of her head. "Ugh, yeah, okay. So, how's this work....?"

I stepped back and let her rise up onto her hindlegs again, but instead of using her wings, she tried to do the same exact thing again. She would've fallen over too, if it weren't for my magic catching her before she hit the back of her head again. I held her up while I walked over to stand up next to her, our unusual behavior attracting a bit of attention from passersby. Not exactly normal to see ponies trying to figure out how to walk like a minotaur.

"Well, it helps to widen your stance at first. Spreading your wings and using them to catch yourself helps too, since you've got them," I explained, giving her an example by adopting a wider stance, my right hindleg just a little bit back from my left. "You need to get used to standing like this first. Then you can learn how to fight."

She tried to mimic my stance, and I could feel her balance swing wildly forward and back as she shifted her hindlegs around under herself. "Aaalright, this is definitely weird...and kind of a strain on my back, and my flanks."

"Yeah, like I said, it takes some getting used to," I said, holding up my forelegs. "Once you're more used to that though, I can show you a few things. Like how to throw a good jab and hook."

"C'mon, you can't show me anything now? That stuff you did was pretty cool when you were in city hall!" she said, her wings twitching forward and back to help keep her stable. "I got this, no problem! Show me how you do that."

I gave her a once-over while slowly pulling my telekinesis away from her. To her credit, she only stumbled a little bit as her support was taken away. She did at least manage to stay on her hindhooves this time. That was more than I expected from what equated to a crash course right then and there.

"...Alright, sure," I muttered, walking around in front of her and widening my stance just a little more, hunkering down and turning my forelegs. "First, you have to turn your forelegs like this. I know it feels natural to keep them the same way you walk on them, but this way offers a better method of defending yourself, and it gives you a good, strong base to attack from."

"This feels really weird..." she said, doing her best to mimic my stance first. "Huh. Y'know, it actually feels easier to stand on my hindlegs when I'm like this!"

"Yeah, but it's more strenuous to do so. You're using the muscles in your legs and back in ways you aren't used to, so don't be surprised if you're pretty sore later."

"Eh, can't be that bad. I work out every day!" she said, grinning at me confidently. "Okay, so now the forelegs?"

"Mmmhmm. Okay, so you see how you have them now? With your forehooves tilted down towards the ground?" I said, reaching forward to take hold of her hooves. "You need to rotate them, so your hooves are pointing up towards your head."

"Wait, really? That seems-"

"Trust me, you can do it. Once you've done that...."

That was how it went, for the next...well, I wasn't really keeping track of the time. Couldn't have been more than an hour, really. She was eager to see new stuff, not out of a desire to genuinely learn at the time, but more out of curiosity. That was fine with me. I was at a loss for things to do outside of going to a theater or something to that effect, so it was a fun diversion. As much as it was a small learning experience for Rainbow Dash, it was a pretty good review for me. Always good to go back to the basics.

I didn't expect much of what I taught her to stick. If that had honestly been my intent, I would've stopped at the peekaboo stance and left it at that until she really got used to it. I'm not ashamed to admit that I was doing it to show off my moves to a friend that thought I was 'cool' and 'awesome'. Can't say I'd ever had someone praise my skills in such a manner before.

The impromptu training didn't last, however. It had gone on for an hour before the sound of hooves against dirt caught our attention. I hadn't really worked up a sweat, but by the time Rainbow had lowered down to all fours, she was trying pretty hard to hide how much standing like that had worn her out. Couldn't blame her, I remember when I just started out doing that sort of thing. My hindlegs and my flanks actively ached for weeks on end, along with my croup.

"Heeeey!"

We both turned our attention towards the voice, the small crowd that had gathered around to watch me work Rainbow over following our example. Applejack was running our way, and she looked even worse than yesterday. I cringed at the heavy and listless gaze she had, her half-lidded eyes and half-hearted smile saying far more than she likely wanted them to. Even though she was running, the way she moved made her appear particularly worn-down. Her legs seemed to move more loosely, but well enough that she could keep a decent pace going. She was getting to that breaking point, but she wasn't quite there just yet.

I moved next to Rainbow and leaned my head towards her. "Are those bags under her eyes, or suitcases? Sweet Celestia."

Rainbow couldn't hold back her snickering, and I was tempted to join her. Alas, Applejack the Weary was upon us, and if I'd known then what I did a short while after, I probably would've enacted my contingency plan much sooner. Everything about her current condition was a disaster waiting to happen. She wasn't even wearing her hat straight, and of all the things she made sure to do exactly right, it was making sure her hat looked good on her head. Considering how much she doesn't care about or for high fashion and perfect grooming, that says a lot about how much her hat matters to her.

"Heh, 'bout time you got here, AJ!" Rainbow said, thumping my chest with a quick swat from her forehoof. "Twilight was keeping me busy while you were doing...well, whatever it is that made you late. What time is it?"

"Ah'm mighty sorry 'bout that! Seems like I'm gettin' pulled in all directions today. First it was that award thing with Mayor, then I had to go help Pinkie with her new batch of cupcakes-"

I don't think I need to explain how that immediately got the gears in my head turning. Sure, her being so tired that she could get an order so wrong that she disastrously poisons a good chunk of Sugarcube Corner's patrons by accident may be a bit of a stretch, but I hadn't factored in the variable I now like to call 'Ponyville Madness'. Crazy shit tends to happen there on a near-constant basis with little to no provocation. Since I didn't live there, I didn't know that just yet.

"-an' after this, I gotta stop by Fluttershy's place so I can help her herd a bunch of newborn bunnies! One Tartarus of a day," she said, removing her hat to rub her brow with her hoof...and discreetly try to wipe the sleepiness from her eyes. "So, whatcha need me for again?"

"Better late than never I guess," Rainbow mumbled, turning to point at the catapult. "I need you to climb up to that platform, and jump down onto that side of the catapult, and it should send me flying faster than I can take off on my own!"

"That seems dangerous. Can you recover from that?" I asked, frowning. "Not to mention that's not how physics work, in this scenario...."

It was impressive how easily Rainbow ignored my logic. It bordered on selective hearing. It was the first example of a long-term lesson I had to learn about her. Specifically, she didn't let things like logic and facts stop her from at least trying to do something.

Then I remembered that the catapult was made from wood. Things suddenly made sense from there.

"Pff, we got this! AJ said this could work, and she's not the type to lie," she said, waving me off and taking to the air. "C'mon, Applejack! Let's do this."

I could explain the significance of wood, but it would probably be better to just let things proceed as they were. You'll understand quickly enough. The crowd that had begun to disperse started to come back as Rainbow took up her position on one end of the see-saw-like catapult she'd thrown together, and I recall being worried at least a little bit in regards to the quality of construction for the whole thing. She did only slap that thing together in a single day, I think....

Still, whatever the case, I offered no further protest as Applejack made her way up to her designated platform. I became only slightly concerned when she missed and full-on faceplanted into the ground not once, but several times. She seemed damn near delirious from the start, and she was only getting worse with every impact. At one point, she didn't even bother with the platform. She just pulled her side of the see-saw down and climbed up onto it.

Rainbow Dash was not impressed.

Rainbow Dash was even less impressed and more along the lines of groaning in pain when Applejack hopped off of the see-saw. The way her legs buckled under the sudden shift beneath her hooves and her chin slammed down onto the wood had me cringing, and she was clearly dazed. I didn't notice Applejack climbing back up onto the platform until it was too late.

Even as I reached to try to snatch Rainbow off of the see-saw, I could see her earth pony magic gathering in her hooves. She'd done it every single try before this, but this time it looked almost luminescent in its intensity. I don't think anyone else around us saw it the way I did, but when her hooves impacted the catapult, I only caught what the magic did because I was expecting it.

As soon as she slammed down on it, the magic rushed into the wood and coursed through it, flowing directly across and underneath Rainbow's collapsed form. It was a little too late to tell Applejack to wait, at that point. The magic rushed up under Rainbow while the catapult shifted under her, all of the magic surging up under Rainbow's form and cradling her just as her side of the see-saw reached its apex. The end result was Rainbow being sent rocketing into the air in a near-perfect arc, her tail leaving a lovely rainbow trail behind her.

"AAAPLEJAAAACK....!"

I tried to follow where she went, but judging by how she'd left a trail behind herself, she'd at least managed some amount of control once she took off. No doubt a part of her constant training. Pegasi need good reflexes, and it comes fairly naturally to them. In any case, without knowing where exactly she landed, it would be useless to teleport. Not to mention, I didn't know the landscape outside of Ponyville all that well, and that was clearly where she was headed. Hopefully her wings could overcome the overwhelming force thrust upon her by AJ's earth pony magic.

Applejack actually had the nerve to say 'you're welcome' before trying to leave. I knew I had to stop her there. The idea of something like this going down with Fluttershy didn't sit well with me, mostly because I didn't want to imagine how Applejack could screw up herding bunnies.

"Hey, Applejack! Wait up!" I called out to her.

"Huh? Whuzzat?" she said, her drooping ears perking up suddenly. "Somepony call fer me?"

I stepped around in front of her and nodded. "Yes, I did. Look, you said you were going to help Fluttershy herd some bunnies, or something like that?"

"Uh, yeah. Was just gonna head over there," she said, blinking a few times. "Honestly, ah don't have time for this kinda stuff, but ah ain't the type o' pony that goes back on 'er word."

"I figured. That being the case, let me take care of the bunny herding. You can just get back to your farm and finish your work, no problem," I said, smiling a little. "If you're up later, maybe you can join Spike and I? I talked with Granny Smith and she said we could camp out on your farm tonight."

"Oh, really? I thought-" she said, before a mighty yawn interrupted her, a hoof coming up to cover her muzzle until it passed. "-thought y'all were stayin' at Fluttershy's to avoid that?"

I giggled faintly and shrugged. "Your little sister mentioned s'mores. Plus, you know how curious kids can be."

"Don't ah know it. Apple Bloom's so curious ah swear she'd jump off a bridge just to see how much it'd hurt when she hits the bottom." she grumbled, her head slowly lowering as she spoke.

"Well that's morbid. Hey," I said, making a loud snapping sound with my horn. "You alright?"

Her head shot up like someone had just zapped her in her flank, and her wide eyes darted this way and that in a brief panic. "Huh?! I-uh...oh! Yeah, ah'm fine."

"You don't look it."

"Sugarcube, I'm perfectly fine, alright?" she said, giving me a stern glare.

"Fine, sure, alright," I said dismissively. "So I'll help with the rabbits, and you can go back to the farm."

"Sure, sounds fine," she said, yawning again and walking past me. "See ya later, Twi."

"Mmmhmm. Oh! Forgot to ask," I said, turning around to look at her. "You want to go out for some drinks tomorrow night? My treat."

She looked back at me curiously, then hummed in thought. "Dunno if ah'll have time...but I think I can squeeze a little free time in."

"Sounds good!" I said, waving goodbye to her.

"Eeyup! Hope you got a big wallet on ya, sugarcube," she called out as she walked away. "I can really put 'em away!"

"I'll hold you to that! I've come in second place in drinking contests with Princess Celestia before!" I called back, just before realizing that I just shouted that for pretty much everyone to hear.

"Hah! That's a good joke there, Twi!" she said, waving me off. "Like the Princess would ever do stuff like that!"

I made a point of ignoring the fact that that was basically exactly what happened after the whole Nightmare Moon thing went down. Then again, I'm willing to bet a lot of ponies didn't remember much about that night. That was one major cause for celebration, after all.

Still, at least I'd managed to kick my contingency plan into action. If I was right and Applejack was actually responsible for what happened at Sugarcube Corner, then she needed to be stopped before her exhaustion and delirium caused any further problems. Hopefully that could wait until tomorrow evening. For the time being, I tasked myself with tracking Rainbow Dash down. Regardless of how good a flier she was, if she actually crash-landed...well, she could be somewhere injured and unable to get herself back to a safe location. The thought of that didn't sit well with me.

Of course, I wasn't a pegasus, so I wasn't the best equipped for a search-and-possibly-rescue mission. So I opted to get some help from the local weather team. After flagging down several of them and explaining the situation, they headed off in search of their manager. With that taken care of, I headed back to the boutique. I'd left Spike there long enough as it was.

Author's Note

Well! This chapter was fun.

Music I listened to:

Chapter 28 - S'mores

written by Fire Soul

Have you ever had that almost out-of-body moment where, in the middle of a task, the question 'What the fuck am I doing?' pops up in your head? That was what happened with me when I went to help Fluttershy with the newborn bunnies she needed to round up. They were scattering themselves all over the place, and I practically had to walk on eggshells just to make sure I didn't spook them before I could gather them up. I never thought I'd be walking up to rabbits and trying to convince them to follow me with a soft and gentle tone of voice.

Compared to what I usually spent my time doing, this wasn't something I ever envisioned myself spending time on.

That was all after I went to retrieve Spike, of course. He was having a great time playing board games with Sweetie Belle when I left, or at least, that was what I was led to believe, based on the last thing she said before the two of them left earshot. When I stepped into the boutique again, they were downstairs at the same table I'd spotted Sweetie Belle at before, doing some doodling together with her crayons.

My eyes immediately darted to the walls, but to my surprise, there weren't any signs of him practicing his artistic inclinations upon them. He had a bad habit of doing that sometimes. It was the main reason I never let him have crayons at home.

Rarity and I didn't exchange many words, nothing of any particular significance. I didn't feel comfortable around her at the moment, the conversation from earlier still fresh in my mind. She didn't look very comfortable either. Whether that was from guilt or her feelings towards ponies of my particular gender, I couldn't really say. I simply remained amicable with her until Spike was ready to go...after he offered me a new drawing of the two of us in our new home. It looked like he'd remembered more of the details of it than I thought he would.

He was beaming when I said that it would be a perfect decoration for our new fridge.

Thus, we found ourselves heading to Fluttershy's after stopping to get something to eat. Something far, far away from Sugarcube Corner, at least. I felt sorry for Applejack if she really was the cause of whatever happened there. My money was still on food poisoning. The idea of the law not coming down on her wasn't even a possibility in my mind.

In any case, Spike actually proved to be a detriment to the bunny round-up. The vast majority of them were only recently born, and they were particularly skittish around big predators. While I wouldn't consider Spike to be a 'big predator', he definitely was to them, and that just made them run for the hills. Much to his disappointment, I had to have him stay at the cottage while we took care of that.

"So, not that I'm ungrateful or anything, but...why are you doing this instead of Applejack?"

I glanced over at Fluttershy, taking in her slightly exasperated visage. Even for her, the rabbits weren't cooperating, and they were starting to raid the outskirts of the town. She was talking to animals as we went along to keep track of where all the rabbits had wandered off to, but it was still fairly tedious work rounding them all up. She was thankful for the assistance of my magic. They couldn't scatter and flee from me very easily.

To a casual observer, Fluttershy's disheveled appearance was difficult to spot. She was always so neatly-groomed, her mane styled just so, not a single sign of stress or exhaustion on her. I could see a few frayed hairs and the slight sag in her wings, however. She was just a pony after all, and even she could become out-of-sorts.

"Well, Applejack's got a lot on her plate, so I offered to do this while she headed back to the farm," I explained, picking up another three bunnies in my magic. "She looked exhausted. Tomorrow I'm taking her out for drinks. I think she could use the break."

"Oh, that's right, it's Applebuck Season," Fluttershy said, glancing over at a chittering squirrel that pointed out two more that were nibbling on someone's flowers in front of their house. "She's always like that this time of year. Is it really bad?"

I shrugged. "She seems a bit delirious and extremely sleep-deprived. Moreso than most farmers are, anyway."

Fluttershy shook her head, frowning. "That's no good for anyone. I don't know why she's always been so stubborn about hiring some help during the season."

"That she is. It's hard to talk sense into ponies like her," I said, picking up the two bunnies in my magic as well. "Uh, I'm reaching the limits of my focus, and this is starting to become a strain. Mind if I take these ones back?"

She glanced at the forty or so small rabbits floating around me and nodded. "I didn't realize you'd grabbed so many. Of course, go ahead! I'll try to round up some more of them. Oh, I hope they'll stay in their pens this time, I really do need to count them all...."

That was how it went for the rest of the day. Unfortunately I had forgotten to pick up any sort of camping supplies, and the job with the rabbits had taken all day, but at least I managed to find enough time to stop in at the grocery store in town to buy some graham crackers, marshmallows and plenty of chocolate bars. I was already going to have to ask the Apple Family if we could borrow some camping supplies, I didn't want to ask them for treats on top of that. Seriously, I was moderately rich, it would just be really tacky.

When I returned to get Spike from Fluttershy's cottage, she was in the kitchen getting a few things together in preparation for making herself some dinner. Spike and I weren't sticking around to eat, so it made sense she was only cooking for herself. I'd informed her that we weren't sticking around that night, so she knew. Still...an idea snuck up on me.

"Hey Fluttershy. You want to come with us?"

She peeked her head out of the kitchen while humming in thought. "I suppose I could. I haven't really started cooking anything just yet, I could put everything back."

"Would you like to?" I asked, smiling. "More the merrier."

Spike crawled up onto my back and grinned. "C'mon! S'mores!"

"Well...okay!" she said, ducking back into the kitchen. "I have a sleeping bag somewhere around here. Just give me a little time."

It didn't take much time, all things considered. With Spike and I helping her look for her camping stuff, we tracked it down in record time, along with her tent. Judging by the weather however, it wasn't likely she'd need that. The skies were clear and there was no hint of rain at all. If anything, I was more curious about how I'd handle sleeping outside, even with a sleeping bag.

Don't get me wrong, I'm no stranger to being outdoors. Lots of my time was spent outside, walking the streets when I wasn't busy studying at the castle or at home. That's not counting when I was younger and I was constantly being forced to leave Canterlot and travel around. However, I always had a roof over my head back then. There was actually a small thrill to the idea of sleeping outside just to...y'know, do it.

I suppose having a secure place to do so had something to do with it, but that was just a small aspect.

Once Fluttershy had her sleeping bag on her back and a few drinks in a saddlebag for us, just some fruit juice, I don't recall what kind, we were ready to leave...until Angel hopped up onto her back and squeaked something at her. I suppose he had something to say about his caretaker going AWOL for a single night.

She looked back at him, then over to me. "Would it be okay if Angel came with?"

I stared at the little white brat of a bunny for a moment, pondering the question. I hadn't had much time to deal with him, so who knew if he was a jerk because he wanted to be, or if it was just because of some misguided sense of needing to defend his owner. Perhaps having him along would go the distance in getting on his good side more.

"I don't see why not," I said, looking back at Spike. "What do you think?"

Spike looked at the rabbit and grinned. "I don't mind!"

Angel stared at him for a while, just long enough for it to get awkward. His eyes were wide, and while I wasn't in the perfect position to accurately estimate, it looked like he was focused on Spike's mouth. He only looked away when Spike leaned over to my left to see what was up ahead.

I smirked and glanced over at Fluttershy. "Huh. Maybe your pet rabbit would be able to survive relatively well in the wild. He still has his survival instincts."

"Huh? What do you mean?" she asked, glancing back at Angel curiously.

"Well, unless I was reading it wrong, he looked a little freaked out when Spike flashed those chompers of his."

"Really?" she asked, smiling at Angel. "But you don't need to be afraid of Spike. He wouldn't hurt a fly!"

I wasn't going to mention that she was wrong about that. Meat may not be as openly available in Equestria as it is in griffon lands, but he has had it before. I'm not saying he'll run around hunting little animals and feasting on them, but if push came to shove, yeah, he'd probably be willing to do it. If you think I'm joking, well...you weren't there the first time he tore into a freshly-cooked steak. He completely forgot his table manners. As it stood though, he was well-fed enough with gems that his only dietary concerns were how much sugary sweetness he could pack in his belly later tonight.

I'd hoped that keeping his diet meat-free would make him less scary to others in Canterlot, but he's a happy little dragon. That means he flashes those razor-sharp teeth of his whenever he's in a good mood. All anyone has to do is see those teeth and suddenly their foals aren't safe around him and his scratchy claws. Fuck 'em.

I glanced over at Angel and nodded. "She's right you know."

"Yeah!" Spike called out. "I wouldn't hurt anyone! That wouldn't be nice."

Angel didn't seem to understand what he said, not completely anyways, but I had to assume he'd picked up on enough, because he calmed down significantly with just a little reassurance from his caretaker and us. I was a bit startled when I felt his small weight land on my back, right between Spike and the back of my neck, and I looked back to see what was going on.

Spike seemed to be startled by it too, since he almost fell onto his back from his sitting position. He was used to just holding on to my mane if he lost his balance, and I'd gotten used to bracing his weight in such a way that I could catch him as long as he kept a good grip. Failing that, I still had my magic.

The two of them stared at each other while Angel sized Spike up. He didn't seem so afraid now, reminiscent of the first time he met Spike and started messing with him. Perhaps it was just instinctual? I mean, under what seemed like above-average intelligence, he was still just a rabbit. Even an animal at the zoo knows to run when there's danger nearby.

Eventually, after he seemed to approve of Spike's presence enough to tolerate it, he decided that he'd make the biggest spine on Spike's head his new perch. I thought of saying something, but Spike didn't seem to have any problem with it, and even stood up on my back so Angel could get a better view. I could only imagine what his tiny mind was going through, being so high up. Then again, his caretaker was a pegasus, so for all I knew he'd been a whole lot higher up than that.

"So, what did you go to Stalliongrad for in the first place?"

I glanced over at her and tilted my head. "I didn't tell you? I could've sworn I did...."

She didn't remember, and neither did I, so I gave her the short synopsis while we headed for Sweet Apple Acres. The sun was going down and it was starting to get dark, but with a little illumination from my horn, we managed just fine. After walking these paths on the outskirts a few times, they really weren't as complicated to me as they'd initially been when I first arrived in Ponyville. It was a real bitch to find Fluttershy's cottage before. Now it was almost second nature.

By the time we reached Sweet Apple Acres, it was getting a lot darker much faster. That was usually how it went, during the period right between sunset and night. Granny Smith was waiting for us to show up, and Big Mac was finishing up his dinner inside with Apple Bloom, who hadn't noticed us just yet. I felt ashamed having to ask them for sleeping bags, but Granny seemed okay with it, so I suppose it was okay.

I glanced around for a moment, curiously. "Where's Applejack?"

"AJ? She's upstairs sleepin'. Turned in for an early night, got lots of work ta do t'morrow," Granny said, frowning a little. "Poor dear's gonna work 'erself into an early grave at this rate. Least I knew when ta step back n' breathe."

"Why not make her hire some help then?"

Granny Smith grunted. "Don'cha think I tried? She'll make a good matron o' this farm when I'm gone, with how dang stubborn she can be. Kept on refusin' even though she knows she's more overwhelmed than a newborn in a spellin' bee!"

I blinked a few times while Spike climbed down off of my back. "Wait, she's aware?"

"Oh, she won't say it out loud, but she knows! I didn't raise no dimwit filly, an' she'd hafta be plumb stupid not to," she said to me, just before she cleared her throat and sat up straighter. "Apple Bloom! Yer lil' dragon friend is here!"

There was a four-hooved thump from further in the house, and the sound of galloping punctuated a small filly barging her way into the room. She skidded to a halt in front of my startled son, and I couldn't help but chuckle as he stumbled back a few steps to avoid colliding with her. Her hooves clattered against the wood floor before she caught herself, her excitement almost causing her to faceplant in front of everyone. I don't know if I would've been able to hold back my laughter if that happened, and that would've been rude of me.

"Whoa! Uh, h-hey Spi-" she began to say.

"Apple Bloom!"

The snap in Granny Smith's voice almost made me jump to attention, with how authoritative it sounded. Even Spike jolted in place, lowering his head and clenching his teeth. He knew that tone. It was the kind I used whenever he did something particularly bad, like raiding our stash of gems because he thought he could get away with sneaking a few while I wasn't looking. Unfortunately for him, I'm rather obsessive about keeping track of that sort of thing.

Granny Smith glared at Apple Bloom for a moment, just long enough to make the poor filly fidget in place. It was the very image of a scolded filly that knew she'd done wrong, and she was just waiting for the hammer to fall. Even Spike seemed to be frozen in fear of a punishment that wasn't even his. Fluttershy and I shared a knowing look with each other as Granny Smith wiggled in her seat to get a bit more comfortable.

"What've I told you about runnin' in the house, sugarcube?" Granny asked, tapping a forehoof on the armrest of her rocking chair.

The little filly couldn't meet her grandmother's gaze, her eyes turned towards the floor. "I shouldn't be doin' it?"

"That's right. So why'd ya do it?" Granny asked patiently.

"I got too excited," she said, lowering her head. "I'm sorry."

Granny nodded once and cracked a smile. "That's alright honey, just don't do it again."

Fluttershy and I both breathed a small sigh of relief. It would've gotten awkward if she'd actually punished Apple Bloom after we'd just arrived. It's one thing to punish your children for their misdeeds, that's only proper disciplinary action. It's entirely different to do so while you have company over.

"Yes, granny." Apple Bloom replied with just a bit more life to her voice, perking up once more.

"That's a good filly. Now!" she said, motioning to the kitchen. "Go on an' get yer hooves washed up! Dinner'll be ready in a bit, then y'all can head on out to the campsite."

Apple Bloom quickly nodded, and I patted Spike's back. "You go wash your claws off too."

"Okay." he said, hurrying to catch up to Apple Bloom, who was already past the dining room.

Fluttershy looked back at Angel, who'd taken up his usual perch on her back, then looked to me. "I'd better take Angel to clean up as well."

The little rabbit protested, but Fluttershy was having none of it. Soon it was just Granny Smith and I, alone in the living room. She looked to me with a smile and there was a moment of companionable silence...until things began to get awkward. Thankfully, she had her own special way of dealing with that awkwardness.

"You wanna step outside with me for a while? I need some fresh air." she said, slowly getting out of her seat and cracking her back once she was on her four hooves.

I shrugged and nodded. "Don't see why not. Need any help?"

She quickly waved me off, a 'grmph' being muffled in her mouth as she shifted her weight on her rickety legs. "Don't you go frettin' over me, young'un. I can handle this."

"Heh. I see where AJ gets it from." I teased, walking over towards the front door while pushing it open with my magic.

'Darn tootin'," she said while hobbling out past me. "Ya'd be hard-pressed ta find an Apple mare that ain't ornery an' wild as our ancestors! Back when herdin' was the only way and we survived by bandin' together."

I followed her out and closed the door behind us. "Not much of that these days."

"Mmmhmm," she hummed, hobbling over to the rocking chair she kept out on the patio and taking a seat on it. "Lots of morals gittin' left behind. Sometimes for the better, sometimes not. Take that whole mare-on-mare marriage hooey...."

Inwardly, I cringed as I rose up onto my hindlegs and leaned my back against the side of the house, next to her chair. "You don't have a problem with that, do you?"

"Whazzat? Oh, psh, o' course not! T'ain't none o' my business who ponies go gallivantin' around with in the bedroom. Us Apples might be steeped in tradition, but we keep an open mind!" she said, hmph'ing and smacking the armrest of her chair with her hoof. "No, I just wish they'd passed that law a lot sooner! I woulda married Peach Seed if'n that'd been the case!"

"You...wait, you're into mares?" I asked, reaching for my cigar case only for a moment before thinking better of it.

"Eeehh..." she said, wiggling a hoof half-heartedly in the air. "Mares can look fine n' dandy, but I prefers me a big strong stallion. Still, Peachy had her some nice legs....!"

I did everything in my power to limit the reflexive shuddering only to my innards. The very thought of a mare like her having erotic fantasies of any sort set my young pony mind into a revolted tizzy. I couldn't fault her for it obviously, but it's one of those knee-jerk reaction things. You can't help but have your whole body cry 'Eeeww....!' all at once.

"Whole lot better than my late hubby, ah'll tell ya what!" she said, leaning back in her seat and beginning a slow forward-and-back rocking. "That stallion could talk a sweet game and paint a pretty picture, but he couldn't run a farm ta save his life! Least Peach would-a had the legs for it."

"Hm...well, what was your husband like?"

She closed her eyes while a wide smile slowly spread itself across her muzzle. I could tell she was walking through memory lane, an impressive feat for someone her age, and whatever she was seeing, she was enjoying it. Her chair began to rock just a bit faster the longer she lingered, and I gave her all the time she needed to collect her thoughts.

"Weeeeell, he was a layabout," she eventually said, groaning as she turned a little in her seat until something in her back popped. "Aah, there we go. Anyway, he was more of a city-slicker. Never did a hard day o' work in his life. One Tartarus of an artist though."

"Sounds like a match meant for Elysium," I said sarcastically, looking past her towards a section of the orchard. "What was his name?"

"Stencil Case," she said, grumbling a little. "Ain't never seen a lazier pony, but somethin' about 'im just captivated me. My daddy hired him from some agency up in Canterlot, said we needed ta drum up business outside of Ponyville if the farm was gonna survive. We needed good advertisin', and my husband came highly recommended."

She sighed wistfully and turned her gaze up towards the clear night sky. "He was such a charmer! Voice so rugged, he sounded like he was right out of a fairytale, and oh, the pictures he could paint...! I was smitten the first time I caught him up at the crack of dawn, waiting for the sun to rise just right so he could paint Sweet Apple Acres."

"He sounds like a nice stallion...." I said, unsure of what else to say.

"Mm, that he was. One thing led to another eventually and, well..." she said, motioning behind herself at the house. "Them ponies in there came from somewhere."

"Wow, conceiving out of wedlock?" I asked, quirking a brow. "Wasn't that really frowned upon back then?"

"Hoo-wee, yer darn right it was! Happened right around estrus season too, obviously! We shoulda known better, but you know how it is when you're young," she said, smacking her knee with a hoof. "My daddy was like right out of a cartoon, steam spewin' out his ears an' everything when he found out I was pregnant! Hunted that colt down real fast."

I couldn't help but giggle at the mental image of some big burly farmer stallion dragging some city pony off to his farm to get hitched, whether he liked it or not. That sort of thing happened more often than most would like to admit back then. The concept of separated parents wasn't really widely accepted or recognized in those days.

"I was real concerned, truth be told," she said, her rocking slowing down as she relaxed back in her seat. "Sure, it wasn't somethin' anyone liked, but there was nothing stoppin' him from just keepin' in contact here and there while livin' his own life somewhere else."

"But...that's not how it went, right?"

She smiled fondly and closed her eyes. "Nope. Moment my daddy showed up at his doorstep tellin' him he was gonna be a daddy himself soon, he proved that behind all that layabout city-slicker carelessness, there was a stallion instead of a colt. He marched right out to our farm himself and proposed to me on the spot!"

"You were right," I said, cracking a smile. "Sounds like a fairytale."

"Shoot, it felt like a fairytale at the time!" she said, before a brief fit of coughs took her. "Euh, s'cuse me. Anyway, long story short, we were married a week later, an' he moved onto the farm with me and my family. Farm life never suited him, not even a bit, but...eh, we made it work. He proved himself a real stallion by bein' willing to be there for our daughter and make the sacrifices he needed to make to ensure his little filly grew up happy n' healthy. Can't ask for more than that from a stallion in his position."

"Sounds like you had quite a happy family for yourself," I said, a thought hitting me just as she finished speaking. "What about Applejack's parents? Where are they?"

Like flipping a switch, her smile disappeared. Gone was her wistful joy and the aura of fond happiness that even a non-changeling could pick up on. Now she appeared somewhat upset, and uncomfortable with my rather poor choice of topic. I was curious, sure, but I really shouldn't have brought it up so suddenly.

Eventually, she settled into a better position in her chair. "They ain't with us no more, an' that's all I'm sayin' on the matter. Not my place to tell that story to ya. You're Applejack's friend, that's Applejack's burden."

"Oh. I'm...sorry, I didn't mean..." I tried to say, but I was unable to come up with anything that felt adequate.

"It's fine sugarcube, really it is. Can't fault ya for bein' curious, their absence around here was bound to catch the eye of a sharp one like you," she said, her eyes opening a bit wider as she looked over at me. "You got them observin' eyes. Takin' in every little detail around ya. Slick as a greased-up weasel, ten times as crafty too, I'll bet. You got brains and knowledge, more than yer average pony. Wouldn't expect anything less from the student of Princess Celestia herself."

"Ah. Well, er...I'm not sure how to take that." I said slowly, lowering down to all fours again and moving over to sit down next to her chair.

"Depends on how ya use that kind of gift. If ya use it to benefit those around you, then it's a compliment. But if yer usin' it the wrong way, well...yer a snake," she said, clapping her hoof against her armrest to punctuate her point. "But, you're the student of Princess Celestia. If that ain't a stamp of approval, I don't know what is!"

"Heh. I'm sure Applejack would have something to say about that," I muttered. "She's been in a bit of a bad mood ever since this harvesting season started, seems like."

"Eh, don't you fret none. She gets ornery as a mongoose in a snake den when she can't get her beauty sleep," she said, before clearing her throat. "Speaking of Applejack...."

She turned in her seat to look back and perk an ear up, listening to the goings-on inside of the house. I followed suit, even as I heard a few of the joints in her spine pop. Nothing sounded out of the ordinary, and I wasn't sure what she was listening for, but when she settled into her seat once more, I guessed that everything was fine.

"I wanna thank ya sugarcube, from the bottom of my old gizzard, for bringin' my fool granddaughter home safe n' sound," she said, deflating a little in her seat. "Sometimes she gets stupid notions in her head, like followin' a mare she barely knows into the Everfree Forest while her grandma sits at home and frets about whether or not she's okay...."

I blinked a few times at that. "What? You don't have to thank me for that. I'd be dead if it weren't for her. Not in any impressive way either."

"Yeah, she told me about what happened. I wouldn't let her sleep 'til she explained herself," she said, eyeing me with a glimmer of amusement. "Almost went right over a cliff, huh?"

I sighed and shook my head. "What a way for the student of Princess Celestia to go. Not in combat, not through some kind of magic mishap, but conking my head and tumbling over a cliffside."

She cackled out a laugh and reached over to smack me on my withers. "Wouldn't that've been a story! But no, she told me about what went down in the old castle. How you stood up to a Goddess and even tried to hold 'er off so the rest of 'em could escape."

"Well, I was just...I dunno, doing what I was supposed to do," I said, self-consciously reaching up to rub at an itch behind my ear. "I was the only one that could really put up a fight against her. I needed to get them out of there before they turned into a massive liability."

"Hmph! Every last one of 'em was stupider than a dog trottin' into a lion den, followin' you in there like that! Don't care what their reasons were," she said, scowling at nothing. "Like I said, Applejack told me everything. Like how she forced yer hoof on the matter."

"I didn't put my hoof down," I countered, shaking my head. "I should have, but I didn't. Didn't have time, I figured."

"Doesn't matter. Chances are, those idiots woulda chased after you anyway," she said, glancing over at me. "They was in yer way from the start. Cold as it might sound, ya could've just used yer fancy magic ta run an' leave 'em to the fate they was askin' for, doin' what they did. But ya didn't. You were willin' to sacrifice yerself to buy 'em some time."

I shrugged at that waved it off. "If they didn't follow me, the Elements of Harmony wouldn't have worked. Then who knows what would be happening right now."

"Mmh, maybe...but that just brings up a whole 'nother slew o' problems." she grumbled, tapping the arm of her chair in frustration.

"What do you mean?"

She stopped her tapping and looked to me once again. "Don't get me wrong, I know that it's a good thing what happened happened. Just makes an old mare like me worry, is all...."

I knew she had more to say, so I just glanced away to my left, looking over another darkened section of the orchard. With the sun down and the moon coming out, a new kind of light was being cast upon the farm, and with how clear the sky was that night, I could make out quite a few details. Some part of me wanted to get a closer look at the apples still hanging in the trees just to see how much the moonlight made them shine.

"I worry about what Applejack might have to deal with next. Bein' one of them Element Bearers now," she said, looking down at the ground. "Takin' care of some big dangerous beast that the Royal Guard can't deal with. What if y'all come back with her in a bodybag? What if none of ya come back at all next time? She ain't no soldier, not a single one of ya are!"

I couldn't help but frown as that thought hit me. Honestly, it had been something I'd thought about off and on ever since I returned to Canterlot after the whole Nightmare Moon thing. Considering we were now the Bearers for the Elements of Harmony, that technically made us assets of the crown. Specifically, a very special kind of military asset. Whether we liked it or not, if some diabolical nemesis showed up that the military couldn't effectively deal with, we'd probably get called in.

Granny Smith was right to be concerned about them. None of them were soldiers, though a certain pegasus might qualify down the line. She was not correct about me, however. I'm a soldier of my own design.

I turned my attention back to her when I felt her hoof on my wither. "Just promise me somethin', sugarcube. Promise me that if something like that ever happens again, you'll do everything you can to bring 'em back safe. You ain't no soldier, but you're better equipped up in that noggin o' yours than they are. If anypony could save their fool butts, it'd be you."

"Of...of course," I said, looking down at the hoof on my wither, then back to her. "I'll do everything I possibly can."

"That's all I can ask of ya," she said, patting my wither. "Thank you."

"No problem," I said, reaching onto my suit to pull out my cigar case. "Do you mind if I...?"

She glanced at the cigar case for a moment, eyes narrowing to try to bring it into focus before she realized what it was when I flipped it open. "Oh! No, go right ahead, sugarcube. Just don't blow it in my face."

I nodded and uttered a quick 'thank you' before pulling out the cigar I'd started on earlier in the day. With a quick burst of magic, I lit the end of it, leaned back, and let the gentle flavor invade my muzzle while the breeze began to kick up around us. It wasn't particularly hot out at the moment, not with the sun down, and the moon almost seemed to suck the heat from the air, leaving only the mild humidity to harass my sense of comfort. Granny Smith didn't seem to be bothered at all by it, which would make sense. Living out on a farm, in a house that didn't even have an air conditioner installed in a single window as far as I could tell, you'd have no choice but to be used to the more unforgiving outside temperatures.

Thankfully, the wind was blowing from Granny's side of me, so I could puff out my smoke without her getting a faceful of it. Long as that breeze kept up, I was fine. It was quite pleasant, and cooling on the skin as it brushed through my fur. For a time, that was how it went between us while we waited for them to call us in for dinner. Seemed like it was taking a lot longer than I would've expected.

I took in the steady sound of the curved feet of her chair rolling back and forth against the worn patio beneath our hooves, and the rustling of the rich and well-tended apple trees out in the fields. The moonlight painted quite a lovely picture, illuminating almost the entire orchard, with just a few stray clouds blotting it out here and there. I could understand perhaps a fraction of why Applejack worked this farm, in that moment. There was something peaceful and calming about seeing that place from where I was standing.

For a moment, I pretended in my head that it was all my own. I tried to see it from Applejack's perspective. I worked those fields, harvested those crops, and the farm grew through the sweat of my brow and the sturdiness of my own four hooves. I knew the trees as if they were family. I took pride in my work, and I got to look upon the fruits of my labor every day and night.

Yeah. That's an honest life. I could respect that.

It would've been easier to appreciate if it weren't for Granny Smith. She kept looking at me, usually when I wasn't looking in her direction. I could feel her eyes on me. After a solid five minutes of her doing that, I finally decided to speak up.

"Uh, is something wrong?"

She twitched and quickly shook her head. "Nah, nothin' wrong! You just do somethin', reminded me of when I was a little filly."

"What?" I asked, putting the tiny bit of what was left of my cigar out with my magic. "What am I doing?"

"The way your ears twitch and yer eyes dart around," she said, slowing her rocking down again. "S'just like when my parents would do that, workin' the fields."

I tilted my head in confusion. "I'm...not sure what you mean. I don't twitch my ears."

"More like ya don't realize yer doin' it! My mama didn't realize it either. Neither did my dad," she said, hmm'ing quietly in thought. "You really don't notice it?"

"I don't even know what you're talking about." I said, shaking my head slowly.

She nodded and took a breath. "When I was younger, older ponies lived in fear of the Everfree Forest nearby. Only took a few ponies disappearin' before they realized they were contendin' with wild animals for this land. Started makin' ponies real nervous...."

I watched as she reached up to mimic her ears with her forehooves, swiveling them left and right. "Ponies started movin' their ears like this, 'cuz they was always afraid a timberwolf or manticore would sneak up on 'em and gobble 'em up, 'specially if they were alone or they had to go out at night. You do the same thing. You were even doin' it when you stopped in while Braeburn was visiting."

I looked up, as if I'd be able to see my ears somehow. "I do? No one's ever mentioned it."

"Mmmhmm. You do this thing with yer eyes, too," she said, lowering her forelegs and motioning to the front door. "Like when Braeburn was here. Your ears were a-twitchin' left and right, and your eyes kept occasionally dartin' to the windows and the doorways. Like you was watchin' for something. Like you was afraid."

I suddenly felt a lot more self-conscious about my ears. Never thought that'd be a thing, really. I mean yeah, I groomed myself well enough, but outside of my unique gender, I never gave a lot of thought to how I carried myself. No one ever took issue with it, so I never paid it any mind.

"Now I don't know much about how ponies work up here," she said, tapping a hoof against her temple. "But that twitchy behavior was common back then. I didn't really understand it at first, 'til my daddy sat me down and explained that it was 'cuz ponies grew up afraid. Always lookin' over their withers for trouble that might be sneakin' up behind 'em."

I shifted uncomfortably where I sat, the worn grain of the wood beneath my rump making what sounded like a very noisy sound as my clothes rubbed over it. Yet another pony that had me pegged in a way that I didn't expect. I didn't much like how common this was becoming. First Gadget, now an old mare I barely even knew....

I heard one of the joints in her spine pop as she turned her head to look at me better. "But you're a Canterlot noblemare. What could you grow up bein' so afraid of that you'd be like that? My parents lived in constant fear...don't tell me it was the same for you?"

My thoughts immediately drifted to my childhood, and I looked away from her. "It's not something I want to talk about."

"Now you hold on a moment," she said, the sharpness of her tone a sudden contrast from how she'd been since we stepped outside. "You turn this way and look at me, sugarcube."

I hesitated, obviously. This old mare was far more observant than I gave her credit for, and I didn't like how vulnerable that made me feel. I was used to hiding myself from everyone around me, physical or otherwise. It made it difficult for others to figure out what I might be thinking or planning on doing, including my own crew. The fact that I didn't even know I did that thing with my ears bugged me something fierce.

The sudden grasping of my head gave me a moment of vertigo as she forced me to turn my head and face her. The furrowed expression on her face was very different from what I'd seen of her, and her eyes were staring into mine like she was trying to find my soul somewhere inside of them. It made me very uncomfortable, but up against even an old mare's earth pony strength, I wasn't going to get out of her grip without either hurting her, or hurting myself. Not in any extreme way, but enough to be unacceptable. I just had to put up with this.

She grumbled something unintelligible to herself, her expression souring. "Did someone hurt you, child? On the inside?"

I couldn't stop the sudden sharp inhale. I pulled my head back until she let me go of her own volition, reaching up to brush my mane back into place with my hooves. My lack of an answer was admission enough, and I certainly knew it, but I didn't much feel like trying to lie to her either. I got the distinct impression that she'd see right through it.

"Was it your parents? Someone else ya know?" she asked, her razor-sharp, no-nonsense tone giving her an air of authority. "You tell me who an' ah'll break mah good forehoof off in their ass!"

I snorted in amusement at that, the brashness of it making me snicker. It took me a moment to settle myself down, but judging by the fact that she wasn't laughing, it seemed that she was one-hundred percent serious about it. I wasn't sure how to take that. She didn't know me from a stranger passing through town.

I cleared my throat and shook my head. "My parents betrayed me when I was a little filly, and much like you with your daughter, I won't say anything more on the matter. I don't want to talk about it."

That clearly frustrated by her, judging by how she was glaring at me, but after a while, she relented. "Alright, sugarcube. Sorry. Didn't mean to upset ya."

"It's fine. I just want to leave it behind," I said, waving it off with a hoof. "Just move forward."

"Mmn...if'n you say so, child," she said, giving me an unsure look. "Just remember that if you need to talk, I'm always available. An old mare like me ain't usually got much goin' on every day. I'd welcome the company."

I gave her a quick nod. "I'll keep that in mind."

We fell into silence again before Big Mac's voice from inside called us in. Granny Smith and I walked back in with me holding the door open for her. It turned out that Apple Bloom and Spike had both stayed inside to help Big Mac finish up dinner alongside Fluttershy, and Spike's nigh-immunity to heat and fire made him perfect for helping out with the oven. He'd scared the dickens out of Big Mac when he initially reached in to pull the tray of biscuits out with his bare hands though.

Aside from Big Mac and Granny Smith, we ate a bit lighter than normal. Needed to leave some space for those s'mores, right? When I revealed the s'mores supplies I'd bought, Apple Bloom insisted that we were guests and she already had everything they needed. Of course, in her eagerness to show off the bags of marshmallows, chocolate bars and graham crackers she'd stowed in the kitchen cabinets, she also showed me where she'd gotten them from. It wasn't difficult to float them into the cabinet while Apple Bloom wasn't looking.

Granny Smith saw me do it. She chuckled and gave me a wink.

With our supplies in hoof, we headed out to the campsite with Apple Bloom leading the way, a lantern hanging from her muzzle. It was a bit of a hike near the orchard, all things considered. Now that I was aware of it, I realized that my ears were indeed on a constant swivel, twitching this way and that, trying to pick up on everything around me. I tried to keep them still, and it immediately felt wrong to me.

We reached the campsite soon after that, and Apple Bloom quickly went to work trying to start the fire with two sticks and a piece of string. I could've started it up with my magic, but I'd never actually seen anyone do this in real life. I'd seen that classic method in cartoons, which always seemed horribly inefficient to me, but this method she was using intrigued me.

Soon, we had a fire going, with a small pile of wood nearby having been gathered earlier, courtesy of Big Macintosh himself. We immediately went to work grabbing some good sticks and spearing some marshmallows on them. Apple Bloom took to showing Spike what to do with gusto while Fluttershy and I just watched in passive interest while our marshmallows roasted over the fire. Angel turned out not to be a very big fan of the marshmallows, but he was very content to munch on graham crackers and just a little bit of chocolate.

Once we were all settled in, we had to think of something to do while we waited. It didn't take long for Apple Bloom to suggest telling scary stories, something that she quickly took the helm on. I could tell Fluttershy wanted nothing to do with it, but where could she go to get away from it? Spike was of course enthralled by the idea. Really, he was enthralled by the entire experience. He was a curious one, after all.

As Apple Bloom told her scary stories, I began removing the roasted marshmallows and getting the graham crackers and chocolate bars out. I made the s'mores for everyone, and I showed Spike how to make one. I'd never made one before, but it's not like s'mores are complicated. You see it once and you probably know how to do it for the rest of your life.

While he certainly enjoyed the s'mores, they didn't save him from the effects of the story about the shadow mare that hid in the closets of naughty fillies and colts, just waiting for the chance to strike and punish them for their bad behavior. I could see him trembling just a little bit while he was snacking on his second s'more, and oddly enough, so was Fluttershy. By the time the story was over, Fluttershy was cowering on the ground next to me while Spike was just hugging his knees with his arms. Eh, a safe amount of fear is good to feel when you're at his age. Helps you grow up a little more well-rounded.

Of course, Fluttershy and I were grown-up enough to know that it was just a story. I'd seen and experienced true terrors personally, so the story did nothing for me, but it was one I'd have to keep in mind in case I did something like this again. By the time we got ready to go to sleep, Fluttershy was looking okay, though she did move her sleeping bag just a little closer to me. Angel was, of course, a constant protector. I was getting an idea as to the dynamic of their relationship.

I couldn't say the same for Spike, however. Let's just say, he slept with me in my sleeping bag that night.

It was a strange and eventful day for me, and that talk with Granny Smith had been something else, but...out there, in the orchard? I felt peaceful. Or maybe that was the initial sugar high of melted marshmallows and chocolate in my gut. Hard to tell. Either way, that brief night of camping was pleasant, and I looked forward to more. With that thought in my mind, I hugged Spike closer to my chest and slowly fell asleep to the sound of creaking trees, whistling winds and rumbling dirt beneath us.

Author's Note

Well, this one was a bit of a trial for me to write. Still, I had fun with Granny Smith!

Gran-Gran is best Nan.

Chapter 29 - Evil Enchantress

written by Fire Soul

Morning broke early, to the sound of a crowing rooster and a dry, scratchy-feeling throat. I really wasn't used to camping out, though I had a feeling that if I'd had a tent, I would've been fine. That scratchy feeling in your throat is usually from the wind blowing on your face while you're sleeping, in case you didn't know. I needed some water, and I didn't have any on me. Spike was still there in my hooves, and when I lifted my head and sat up just a bit, he stirred and sat up slowly as well.

Sometimes I just liked watching him move. One of my favorite things when I first got him was being there when he woke up. The effect had worn off somewhat over the years, especially since he started getting used to having his own room to sleep in, but every once in a while when he had a nightmare or he got spooked by his young imagination going wild and making him see monsters under his bed, I got to enjoy the sight of him just beginning to rouse himself from slumber.

He always started with this dazed, half-asleep look-around. He'd sit up real casual-like and yawn, then start looking around the room, taking it in without really processing any of it. Sometimes he didn't even realize I was there. Then he'd get to the eye-rubbing to get all of those crusty bits out of the edges, if he had any. After that, it's all about standing up, stretching, and getting the gears in his brain turning while he scratches any idle itches that built up under his scales overnight.

All of that ended when a dog came out of nowhere and pounced on both of us.

The ambush took me somewhat by surprise. I heard it coming, but by the time I noticed it, it was too late to wriggle free of the sleeping bag and defend myself. Soon, Spike and I both were bowled over by a fairly light, fuzzy body, and we were mercilessly covered in slobber while Spike shrieked in alarm. His cry soon devolved into giggles as the dog went after his face with gusto, that slobbery tongue coating his smooth scales in a layer of germs and grossness that I would take particular care in cleaning up. Spike probably thought nothing of it.

Soon, once I'd gotten my forelegs free of the sleeping bag, the dog turned its attention on me the moment I tried to sit up. I shouldn't have made any sudden movements. Now it was my turn to experience the full, true horror of dog-breath and dog-tongue. I raised my forelegs to cover my face, but that didn't stop her. In fact, it only encouraged her, that cold nose burrowing under my forelegs until she was past my defenses, and with nothing between me and the dog, my muzzle was doomed.

Lick after lick assaulted my muzzle with sloppy wet sounds just after I scrunched my eyes shut. I thought of charging magic into my horn, but the wet sensation of her licking at the base of my horn erratically in her gusto to coat my entire face made me think otherwise. Last thing I needed to do was live with the fact that a dog accidentally gave me a hornjob while I was partially stuck in a sleeping bag with my son.

"Winona! Down, girl!"

My ear twitched as Apple Bloom called out, the dog's licking ceasing almost immediately upon hearing her. With the dog not blitzing my face and standing up at attention with her semi-floppy ears perked up, I could make out her features more easily. A red collar around her neck, a golden nametag, and all the colorings and features of an energetic border collie...that was about right for a farm dog. I had no doubt that she was Applejack's trusted partner when it came to dealing with the animals around the farm, such as the sheep or the cows.

Winona was off of us with a whistle from Apple Bloom, and that gave me the chance I needed to get up and wipe my face as clean as I possibly could while Fluttershy hid her laughter off to my left. Maybe I should've wiped my face off on her fur, see how long she'd be laughing then! Eh, who am I trying to kid here? She could've been busting a gut laughing and I still wouldn't have had a problem with it.

"Well, that dog doesn't have manners, does she?" I muttered sleepily, standing up after climbing out of my sleeping bag and stretching out my body. "Friendly though, I guess."

"Sorry 'bout that," Apple Bloom said while Winona ran circles around her, barking a few times to try and get her attention. "She's usually more well-behaved, but yer a new face 'round here. She just wanted to say g'mornin'!"

"Well, good morning to you too, Winona," I said, wincing as my ankle in my bad hindleg made a rather distinct popping sound. "Oh daaa-dang it, I know what that means...."

"Are you okay?" Fluttershy asked, her voice tinged with concern. "That didn't sound good."

I quickly shook my head. "No, it's just aching already. I probably slept on it weird. Means I'll have to take it easy."

"Anything I can do to help?" Fluttershy asked, examining my hindleg. "I know how to give massages."

"Really? Why would you know how to do that?"

She shrugged. "My animals sometimes get too tense or they pull a muscle, so I have to help them."

I stared at her for a few seconds. "You'd...you would have to know the anatomy of every single kind of animal in your shelter to do that to them safely."

"Well, yes, I would," she responded, looking just a smidge smug about it. "Animal books are easy enough to get your hooves on in my line of work."

"Why aren't you a veterinarian then?" I asked, tilting my head in confusion. "I'm sure that pays more."

Winona barked at us a few times, and Apple Bloom patted her on her head. "Fluttershy is a vet! She takes care of lots of animals!"

"You are?" I asked.

"I'm not!" Fluttershy responded, shaking her head.

"Ah thought ya were?" Apple Bloom chimed in, while Winona panted noisily next to her.

"No, I'm not a licensed one," Fluttershy said, scuffing her hoof on the ground nervously. "I just know some basic things. I like taking care of animals, but the things vets have to do....I-I-I don't think I'd have the stomach for it."

"So you're not a veterinarian, but you could be?" I offered, taking a look around the campsite while rubbing at the corner of one of my eyes with my fetlock.

"That's correct." Fluttershy said, muffling a yawn with her hoof.

"Huh. I always thought ya were one...." Apple Bloom muttered, petting the top of Winona's head.

Spike had been silent through all of this, likely because he had nothing to really offer as input on this particular juncture. Of course, that was only a temporary issue, as his young and innocent mind began to churn with ideas and thoughts from a perspective that only an innocent young child could have...or perhaps a mentally handicapped individual, either-or.

Spike smiled and raised a hand. "Um. I'm a dragon."

I quickly muffled my laughter and Fluttershy did the same. Even Apple Bloom found it funny, and I don't think she was all that much older than him! Spike looked at us in confusion, and just a hint of embarrassment, though I doubt he really understood what we found funny about what he just said.

I reached down and patted him on the top of his head. "That you are, that you are."

With all of that out of the way, we got to work stomping on the charred remains of the campfire and covering it with dirt. If we'd had water, we probably would've thrown that on there as well. 'Only you can prevent forest fires' and all that Sizzle the Salamander bullshit. I mean yeah, good advice and all, but you have to be really stupid in order to just leave a burning campfire unattended in the middle of the forest. Then again, Sizzle the Salamander's more targeted towards children watching television, so....

A clunk of hooves on tree trunk sounded off from somewhere nearby, and I spotted Applejack already up and about, her sluggish movements very telling as to the state she was in. Even with her stetson on, it was easy to see how her ears were laid back and how her features were sagging with exhaustion. Her eyes looked heavy, and as I watched, she missed the tree on her next few kicks.

This was getting ridiculous. Nevermind letting her wear herself down. At this rate, she was going to ruin her health, just as Granny Smith insinuated she would. The sooner that evening came around, the better. Still, I needed to be sure that she was going to follow through on that offer I made to her.

Hygeine first, though.

We all headed for the farmhouse, the promise of water for my throat and the chance to brush my teeth drawing me forward. This was a lot earlier than I was used to getting up. Nine in the morning at the most, on your average day. Celestia forbid Spike actually went to a normal school, I'd have to be up before seven just to make sure he was ready on time! Someone fucking shoot me in the face and put an end to it all, in that scenario.

Once that was all taken care of, and mind you it took some time because that house only had one bathroom, we began to head out with a quick goodbye to Granny Smith and Big Macintosh. That was, until a thought occurred to me. I eyed Big Macintosh for a moment, then looked back at Spike. He was situated quite comfortably on my back, and I'd grown so used to his weight, it felt like nothing.

"Spike, can you go with Fluttershy back to the cottage?" I asked, lowering down to let him hop off. "I need to speak with Big Macintosh."

"Huh? What for?" he asked, frowning as he climbed down.

"Just adult stuff, hun," I said, looking over to Fluttershy. "Er, sorry, that's okay, isn't it?"

"Of course!" she said, kneeling down like I did so Spike could climb on. "I'll make sure he gets some breakfast in him."

"Thank you," I said, watching as Spike hesitated for a moment, then climbed up onto Fluttershy's back, with Angel taking perch atop his head once more. "I'll be there soon, alright?"

Spike looked back to me and waved. "Okay. See ya, mom!"

I waved goodbye to him and, when they were gone, turned my attention to the only two other ponies in the room. Granny Smith was reclined on her rocking chair in the living room, while Big Mac was...well, I think he felt awkward, sitting on the couch next to her. Curious, too. He and I hadn't interacted much, and if he was the big pony I made out with during that party, I could understand him feeling a bit awkward around me. Considering I hadn't seen any other big, red, studly stallions in Ponyville yet, the chances of that were climbing ever higher in my mind.

"So, uh..." he began to say, giving me a once-over. "What did you need to talk to me about?"

"Is Apple Bloom around, first of all?" I asked, glancing over towards the doorway into the kitchen."

"Nope. She's gettin' her mornin' chores done."

"Alright. I think I can trust Granny Smith with this too," I said, taking a look at one of the windows just to be sure before I continued. "I need you to meet me at the barn, fully rested, tonight. Around midnight, I think."

He stared at me for a long moment. The silence dragged on, only the creak of the rocking chair interrupting the heavy quiet between us. His eyes grew as wide as dinner plates. Granny Smith stared at me, and I could tell she was fighting against the most wily grin I'd ever seen in my life.

"Uh...what?" I asked, even as Big Mac's face somehow turned an even deeper shade of red.

Granny Smith couldn't hold it in anymore. She guffawed loud enough for the three of us combined while Big Mac did his best impression of Fluttershy, trying to cover his face with a single foreleg. To be fair, his forelegs were pretty beefy and massive compared to your average stallion's, so it was pretty effective. I was just confused, but Granny's laughter was so infectious, I had this odd mix of unfounded embarrassment and amusement going on inside of me. I couldn't help a few confused chuckles.

I looked to Big Mac, a forehoof tapping the floor impatiently. "What? What did I say that was so funny?"

"H-how can ya not know?!" he asked, exasperation and embarrassment tinging his voice with a sense of desperation. "Sweet Celestia, mah granny's right there!"

"But I don't know! What did I say?!"

Granny's laughter elevated from a guffaw to outright cackling, her forehoof slamming down on the armrest of her chair a few times. "Hah, she doesn't even know! Oh mah stars that's amazin'!"

I was getting irritated now, and I fought back a growl. "What don't I know?!"

"Hee hee! Hah! Ah, sugarcube," Granny said, wiping a few tears from her eyes. "I needed that....!"

I snorted and clenched my jaw. "Well, would you mind explaining it to me?"

"Yeah, ah'll explain it alright," she said, her voice suddenly lowering and, somehow, becoming a more sultry kind of deep. "There's a reason the term 'a roll in the hay' became so common. You catchin' mah drift?"

I thought about it for a moment as the gears in my head began to turn. Things started to click into place as a dawning dread filled me from my head to my hooves. I could feel my face lighting up with my embarrassment, a mix of shame at not knowing the origins of such a common term and mortification at basically propositioning her son right in front of her.

"Oh, damn it! I am-I am so sorry, that's-" I tried to say to Big Mac, shaking my head. "I didn't mean it that way at all, I swear."

"Yeah, I kinda figgered that out," Granny said, her wide grin still plastered to her face. "Otherwise, I'd be puttin' some buckshot in ya for bein' such a hussy about it! Least take mah grandson out fer dinner or somethin' first!"

"Granny!" Big Mac sharply stated, semi-muffled behind his foreleg. "C'mon now!"

"What?! Yer old enough, an' this old mare could do with spoilin' some great grandfoals!" she countered, her grin fading quickly.

He fidgeted and glanced at me out of the corner of his eye. "This ain't the time for that, we got a guest here!"

"Bah, fine!" she said, snorting and slumping a little in her seat. "Ah'll just be here, no more grandchildren ta spoil."

I watched Big Mac run a hoof over his muzzle, shaking his head. "Aw, Granny...ah'm workin' on it, a'right?"

"Yeah, ya better be. Ain't never seen Applejack so much as look at a stallion," Granny grumbled, her brow furrowing. "Filly's probably gay as a rainbow. Ain't gettin' no great grandfoals outta her anytime soon."

Big Mac just sighed at that and looked to me again. "If ya weren't askin' for that from me, then what'd ya need me for?"

I took a breath to calm myself down. "Okay...well, it's really simple. If everything goes according to plan, I'm probably going to be hauling your drunk-as-a-skunk sister back here, then I'm going to finish up the work she's got left to do for this season."

"...Uh," he began to say, glancing over to Granny for a moment before looking back to me. "That's a lot of work. How're ya gonna manage that?"

I smirked and pointed to my horn. "In case you haven't caught word yet, I'm a rather capable mage. I can't buck trees, but nothing's stopping me from plucking them."

"Yeah, but...well, that's a lotta trees," he said, looking to the orchard through the window. "You sure you can manage that in one night?"

"Without a doubt," I said without hesitation. "I'll probably be a bit drunk myself, but a small meal and plenty of water'll do enough to get me in working order."

"Well...I mean, I suppose I could help..." he said, rubbing the back of his head and looking to his grandmother. "Granny, what do you think?"

Granny Smith hummed and eyed me curiously. "I don't see no problem with it, long as you can hold up your end o' this."

"But, you don't have a problem with her doin' that to AJ?"

"You said it yerself, she's too old ta spank, an' I'm too old to give her a good old-fashioned flank-kickin'," Granny said, frowning. "So if she's bein' a fool, I say, let 'er be played for a fool."

"I'm glad you see it my way then," I said, smiling at the old mare. "I'll try to make sure she doesn't drink too much."

"Oh trust me sugarcube, if she's drinkin', you'll have a hard time stoppin' her," she said, clearing her throat. "But I wanna be real clear about this...this here? This is a business transaction right here, even if it's really one-sided. You wanna git paid for that work? 'Cuz that's a whole lotta work left out there."

I quickly shook my head. "I've got plenty of money. Besides, it's not like I'm an official employee. This is just me saving a friend from herself, nothing more."

"Hmm..." she grumbled, sinking down in her chair.

Granny stared at me for what felt like a long time, while Big Mac sat off to the side, very much unsure of what to do or say. He seemed like a fish out of water, and I was willing to bet that was a mix of my presence, and him not knowing how to deal with the current situation. The fact that he made out with me in what was likely a bit of drunken fervor might've had something to do with it too. Maybe he thought he had a chance with me or something?

I mean, honestly, he would've had a chance if I wasn't one of Applejack's friends. Have you seen her hunk of a brother?! I'm not too big on stallions, but unf! Celestia would've eaten him up if she were given the chance, because beefcake~!

"Whole lotta trouble to go through just ta help a friend ya barely know, but if ya insist," she finally said, nodding. "Guess we'll just owe ya a favor then. Either way, we need help this season. AJ's just too pig-headed to accept it."

"But I don't-"

"We owe ya...a favor. Simple as that, sugarcube," Granny stated firmly, furrowing her brow. "Now I don't wanna hear no bellyachin' from you about it. You'll accept our gratitude an' like it!"

I sighed and nodded, even as Big Mac cleared his throat. "Well, this is fine an' all, but that don't explain why ya need my help tonight."

"Easy. I don't know the orchard, and I don't know what trees need to be left alone and which ones need to be harvested," I said, shrugging my withers. "With that injury, I don't expect you to carry anything or pull any carts, but I do need your supervision."

"Well...alright then," he said, rubbing the back of his neck with a forehoof. "See ya tonight when ya bring AJ back then, miss Sparkle."

"Please just call me Twilight," I said, grumbling. "I get enough bowing and kowtowing when I attend the royal court or any number of those droll parties and socials the nobles throw for themselves."

"Oh. Uh...sorry. I didn't mean to...." he tried to say, his voice getting quieter the more he spoke.

"No no, it's fine, I'm just saying..." I said, waving it off. "You know, just...just call me Twilight."

"A'right."

"Alright."

To make a long and slightly awkward story short, that was when I left. It was a quick affair, and Granny Smith was still having a small chortle over how I'd asked Big Macintosh for some assistance. There may or may not have been some snide remarks about how Big Mac 'better put a ring on her horn before she has that foal' just as I was closing the front door behind myself. I would have been offended by the insinuation, but I knew she was just poking fun at her grandson. What good parent doesn't do that sort of thing? I mean...not that I'd know anything about that, but still.

My return to the cottage wasn't met with much fanfare. Angel waved hello as I stepped inside, but other than that, I could only assume that Fluttershy and Spike were tending to the animals. I didn't hear anything upstairs, so I marched right up and got to taking that shower I wanted. Just walking from Sweet Apple Acres to there made my bad hindleg throb, and I needed some relief before I could decide whether or not I'd need my painkillers.

Considering what I planned on doing later that night, chances were leaning towards 'very much so, yes'.

Once I'd gotten in the shower, I set the water a little hotter than I normally would for myself and just let it wash over me for a time. I was seated sideways in the tub so the showerhead would spray more directly over my hindleg, and as the muscles began to relax, I got to work with the tedious task of trying to work the cramps out.

Anyone know what torticollis is? Well, to put it simply, it's like an involuntary spasming of muscles that causes them to stay constantly tense, and it hurts a lot, and you really don't want to deal with that sort of thing. Lots of hard-working ponies get it in their backs, and whenever it's affecting them they tend to try not to use the affected muscles as much as possible. Standard medication for that sort of thing is muscle relaxers, for obvious reasons.

What I deal with is a bit similar to that when it comes to my hindleg, but it's not quite as unruly and I don't really need to wait for days for it to go away. The muscles aren't spasming, but with how awkward my hindleg was shaped from how badly it healed, my muscles sometimes get very tense, especially in the mornings after a long day of walking or running around. Sometimes I'll start to feel it the night before, but this was the former scenario this time around.

Fortunately, it usually responded well to a decent enough massage. I should've gotten Spike to come take a shower with me, his little claws work magic, and him being able to pull on my leg to stretch it out while I can focus on keeping it relaxed does wonders as well. As it stood, I had to settle for magic and my hooves. I am a multitasker however, and while I was massaging myself, I could at least set my magic to work lathering up my mane with shampoo and conditioner.

I let my mind wander as I pondered on what Gadget might be up to back in Canterlot. If everything went according to plan, she was probably already enrolled in boot camp, and was likely getting her magic pushed to her limits and beyond. I was sure if she could say anything to me right now, it would be something on the lines of 'oh, fuck you for this'.

Then I recalled what she said about public bathing. It brought to mind memories of the couple times I took a shower with Fluttershy. It would've been nice to have her in there with me, and not just for sexy times. There was something soothing about washing her after that drunken fling, and getting the favor returned the next time around was...well, it was a strange experience, but certainly not unwelcome. I'm sure I would've felt differently if she were just some total stranger I just met in a bathhouse, but as a friend and fuckbuddy, I found it far more acceptable and enjoyable.

The shower passed me by like a daydream. Outside of idle musings, I wasn't really thinking about anyone or anything, and both my magic and my body seemed to be running on autopilot. This routine was fairly standard to me, I went through it often enough that it was like how walking is natural for everyone. My hindleg was feeling better as I stepped out of the shower, a lot less cramped and a whole lot more loose and nimble, but the ache was still there, albeit to a very lessened degree.

I planned on taking a nap before taking Applejack out for drinks, of course. I was going to get tipsy, maybe even totally drunk, but I didn't need to be drunk and sleepy. At least, not as sleepy as I could be working all night long. Unfortunately, taking a nap when you're not sleepy is a bit of a problem.

The only things that felt like they would be issues for me were asking Fluttershy to watch Spike while I did this, and how Spike would react to it. I was already staying in her house without doing much of anything for her in return, and no, I wasn't going to count 'sticking it to her real good' as doing something for her. Asking her to watch and feed Spike while I was off downing drinks and chumming it up with a friend at the local bar seemed a bit much.

As it turned out, all I really had to worry about was Spike having a problem with it. He was a mama's drake through and through, and I was sure he'd have issues with sleeping without me, but Fluttershy was perfectly okay with watching him. He seemed to be more than comfortable enough around her, and Angel actually appeared to be...well, not comfortable with him, but tolerant of his presence. I felt like I could trust Fluttershy to keep an eye on him, and I could at least trust the bunny not to kick him in the balls. Not that that would be even remotely possible for a tiny rabbit, considering his were on the inside.

I had to extract a thorough agreement that he wouldn't give Fluttershy a hard time over it. That was easier than I thought it would be as well. He hadn't had time to get to know Fluttershy long, but even I was well aware of the general aura of gentleness she had. Probably had something to do with her constantly being surrounded by all manner of animals that practically ate right out of her hoof.

With all that taken care of, and it being far too early for me to tuck in for a good, long nap...well, I had a whole lot of time on my hooves. I mean, I was still a bit tired from being up so early, but that just meant that I'd be able to come back sooner to take a longer nap later. At least, that was my plan. Who knew what this town would throw at me next?

Memories of yesterday's incident with what happened at Sugarcube Corner came to mind, and lacking any other ideas, I decided to head there first...after a quick breakfast with Fluttershy and Spike. She made eggs and pancakes this time around. I scarfed them down like the pig I am beneath all of my cultured and elite status. Judging by the way Fluttershy was looking at me, sitting on my left, she wanted to lick away a dollop of syrup that had gotten into the fur at the corner of my mouth, buuut with Spike there, I suppose she thought better of it.

I really didn't know what to make of Fluttershy, back then. She was so open and free with her emotions, it was a stark contrast to the life I'd lived up to that point. I was and still am a very guarded mare. I have trust issues, even towards myself, let alone other ponies. I was even worse back then, when the ponies of Ponyville were more like curious examples of purity to me than anything else. While Fluttershy was certainly a sexpot of a mare outside of the public eye, she still took first place when it came to innocence. Well, that or being full of fear, but that's another matter entirely.

In any case, with Fluttershy and Spike staying at the cottage, I took a trek into town, after taking one of my pain pills. I didn't like relying on them, but I liked to believe that I knew when I needed them and when I didn't. This was one of those times. I'd probably need more as the night wore on later, but for the time being, I just needed to be able to walk into town without cramping up.

The town itself wasn't particularly active this early in the morning. Fillies and colts were already in class, a lot of ponies were already at their jobs, and those that weren't were probably elsewhere, passing the time with who-knew-what. I already had a goal in mind, but if that fell through...well, I'd always wanted to see a small-town market. You don't see those in big cities like Canterlot or Manehattan, and I was curious about how that old-school bartering system worked.

Sure, I've read about it before, but if I have the chance to experience it first-hoof, why wouldn't I just do that? Back before technology started to take off and Equestria's economy began to evolve to keep up with the country's growth, free markets like the one in Ponyville were fairly standard just about everywhere. These days they're much more rare, and usually limited to flea markets and knock-off stores in somewhat ratty-looking areas of larger towns and cities, but in small rural towns like Ponyville...well, they were damn near tradition.

You still had your big business out here, if the presence of the Rich family was anything to go by. The store his family owned and his investments in various businesses around town were textbook examples of modern commerce. Ponies in Ponyville had the freedom to choose between potentially fair, consistent pricing on the items they desired, or they could go to the town market and take a chance at haggling with the merchants that peddled their wares there. You never really knew what you would find in markets like that, though I doubted they'd have anything of particular intrigue in an unassuming town like this one...though perhaps the news about the 'saviors of Equestria' living here might have changed that.

The painkillers were starting to kick in as I got closer to Sugarcube Corner. Unfortunate side-effect to not keeping myself on them regularly. I had no desire to become dependant on them or addicted to them, so I'd have to get used to having days where I'd feel a bit listless, relaxed and fuzzy in the head. Not particularly unpleasant in all honesty, I actually quite like it. A little exercise and I get past those effects, so it's no big deal to me.

Because of the medicine though, I almost didn't notice just how quiet things were. I expected at least a little noise by the time I'd gotten anywhere near Sugarcube Corner, but the air was quiet as could be. Aside from a light, cooling breeze, there was just...nothing. Like a ghost town. I could hear noise in the distance, but anywhere nearby, I couldn't even hear or feel the clopping of hooves on the ground, save for one single location, and it was between Sugarcube Corner and myself.

You can probably guess I was surprised to find a zebra standing in the middle of the street, alone, a cloak hiding her identity. Not that it helped her much in a small town like Ponyville. I hadn't seen a single zebra in town during the small amount of time I'd spent wandering about, and as far as I could tell, she was the first and only one around.

Judging by the way her hoof was firmly clopping at the ground, it looked like she was digging. At first I thought she might've been homeless, and the townspeople just gave the mare her space, but she was far too clean for that. No, she had a home somewhere. The cloak looked like it had been recently washed, and what I could see of the fur around her fetlocks and just slightly above that looked decently groomed, as if she cared enough about her appearance to require a decent presentation of herself to the public.

I approached slowly, cautiously so. I knew nothing about her, and judging by how empty the area was, I thought that perhaps she was some kind of local troublemaker I hadn't caught wind of just yet. If that was the case, I intended to take her down right then and there, turn her in to the local police. I only got a few short steps closer before she noticed me however, and I could tell her ears had perked up under the hood she was wearing.

We stared at each other time, her face partially hidden under her hood, but I could make out her eyes. They were sharp and vibrant, as if she were studying me like some kind of specimen. I could smell the distinct scent of a mix of numerous chemicals on her, and it made her smell like something akin to an apothecary. She tilted her head while she looked me over, while I just stood there and stared back at her.

Eventually, she cracked a smile. "A pony comes to speak to me? After so long, my spirit is set free! Such delight, meeting one so bold. Most ponies in this town have been quite cold."

I blinked at her strange way of speaking. It irked me somehow, but not in a bad way. Moreso, I felt like I was forgetting something very important about that. It only took a moment of pondering for that knowledge to come flooding back to me, and my mouth hung open in shock.

"" I mumbled in her native tongue, too dumbstruck to ponder on the consequences of mentioning it.

In an instant, her joy was replaced with shock. We were practically mirroring each other's expressions, with how her eyes widened and she froze in place. She recovered from the surprise a lot faster than I did however, and immediately she jumped back away from me, uttering some curses under her breath as she turned and bolted for the nearest set of buildings.

She was remarkably fast, and definitely faster than I was on my hooves. Even with her cloak flapping in the air as she ran, she moved faster than I could between two buildings, then around behind them. I rushed in to catch up, my horn alight and a shield spell at the ready just before I ran behind the house. She wasn't there anymore. I perked my ears and listened closely to the silence around me, and up above, I heard hooves scrambling against wood and stone.

I have no idea how she'd managed it, but she'd somehow climbed up onto the roof of the building she'd run behind, and I almost lost her because of it. I tried to keep track of her as she jumped between the roofs of two houses, running around in front of them while trying to keep her in my sight.

"Wait! Please!" I called out to her, just barely avoiding running head-first into a slightly bent mailbox. "I just want to talk to you!"

"" she shouted back at me, just as she jumped from the roof of the last house on the block and fell to the ground.

I winced at the heavy impact, but she'd clearly done this before. She tucked and rolled with the impact, her pained grunt barely audible over the scuffle of her cloak and fur against the dirt and stone beneath her. She was back on her hooves in seconds with little more than a few scuffs to show for it, and I almost threw my bad hindleg out from under myself rushing around the corner to catch up with her.

It was a straight road ahead, and at this rate, she was going to find a good chance to slip away from me just by getting out of my sight. I needed to close the distance, and I knew exactly how. I began to rapidly weave the spell in my mind while measuring the distance between myself and a section ahead of her, and quickly put my plan into action. With a burst of my horn, the world disappeared around me for an instant, and I found myself ahead of her, my hooves violently scraping at the dirt beneath me as I fought to stop myself.

Whenever you teleport, there are two ways of casting the spell. One way causes you to simply displace from one location to another, carrying over your momentum and posture. That's the simpler version of the spell. The more difficult version allows you to control every aspect of your displacement, from what you're doing to whether or not you're moving once the spell has been completed. The difficult version is a much larger drain on one's reserves, so I tend to always go with the simpler version when I deign to actually use it.

I grunted in pain as my hindleg screamed in protest, my ankle joint issuing a sharp, piercing pain that I had to fight against to avoid my hindleg completely buckling on me. I quickly turned once I came to a stop, and stood up straight while facing the shaman down. She skidded to a halt in front of me, surprised by my magical prowess this time no doubt, and I used that moment to my advantage.

"" I stated clearly and concisely, meeting her gaze all the while.

She stopped, and quickly turned all of her attention to me. The air went still and silent again, save for both of us panting softly and working to catch our breaths. The tension between us was almost palpable as she stared into my eyes, searching for something, though what she was looking for I have no idea. Eventually her gaze flicked upward to my horn, then back to my eyes once more.

"" she responded, frowning. ""

I quickly shook my head and looked around the area for anyone that might be listening in. ""

She stayed silent for a time, eyeing me up and down, evaluating me. I could feel it with every pass of her gaze, from my forehooves to the tip of my horn. I'd never met a Zebrican Shaman before, but this was a golden opportunity I couldn't allow to slip by. I'd already made the mistake of letting her know that I know what she is, I had to do my best to make sure she didn't run off and disappear on me.

"" she asked quietly, reaching up to tug her hood further over her muzzle.

"Twilight Sparkle, " I asked calmly, doing my best to maintain a more respectful tone with her.

She seemed to recognize my name, her eyes alight with curiosity. ""

I cringed at that, feeling nervous in the pit of my stomach. ""

"" she demanded, her voice rising ever-so-slightly.

I suppressed my indignance at her being so demanding of me, taking a deep, slow breath. ""

"" she asked, seeming more curious now rather than guarded.

I smirked. ""

"" she muttered, almost inaudible as she looked me over. ""

I tried to steady my nerves as she approached me, the two of us standing tall in front of each other while she sized me up, her stare boring into my own. It was like a battle of wills, and you might think it's easy to just stare at someone in return when they're right up in your face, but it's not. It's just one of those things that sounds easy, but it's far from it.

"" she asked, her expression unreadable.

""

She stared for a moment longer, then closed her eyes and nodded. ""

I slowly let out a breath I didn't realize I'd been holding, relief coursing through me. ""

I didn't want to think about the condition I'd be in, that early in the morning. While I could've asked for another time under normal circumstances, I was in no position to make any demands of her. I was already walking on thin ice just by being what I was.

Without another word, she turned and left, though at a much more moderate pace compared to the short chase we'd both found ourselves in. I'd already caught my breath by the time she was out of my sight, and I quickly retraced my steps to find my way back to the main road. Ponies had begun to come out of their houses as well, and I couldn't help but be a bit bothered by their behavior.

Even worse, now they were being wary in my presence. I could feel a lot of them staring at me, and when I approached one of them, they actively tried to shy away from my gaze. I didn't want to jump to any conclusions, but I genuinely didn't know what to make of it. Had the Shaman done something to upset them, or alienate them? It'd be a real problem if whatever she did somehow carried over to me. I'd hate to be viewed in a negative light because of a misunderstanding. I refused to really believe she'd done anything particularly wrong, because Shamans are generally pacifistic and very accommodating...as long as you don't try to take advantage of them.

With the ponies avoiding me, I headed straight for Sugarcube Corner instead of trying to ask them what was wrong. Perhaps Pinkie could explain what all of this was about. That and maybe give me something to drink so I could take another painkiller, though I was sure I'd regret doing that already. Running after her like that did my bad hindleg no favors.

You can imagine my surprise when a pair of pink hooves reached through Sugarcube Corner's front entrance immediately after I opened the door, and yanked me inside. I was greeted by Pinkie's panicked face, the mare jolting around me and pulling the door shut while checking me for...something. I don't know what, but she sure was thorough about it. She looked at my eyes, in my ears, even under my tail for some reason, and upon finding nothing, she went for my mouth.

I drew the line right there. I pushed her away just as she began to pry my muzzle open, snorting and waving her off as my ass bumped back into the door. I stared at her in surprise while she looked at me nervously, trotting in place on her hooves.

"Oh gosh! She didn't get you, did she?!" she asked, the alarm in her voice all too evident. "That evil enchantress is bad news!"

....Oh. So that's what this was about.

Author's Note

The last couple chapters have taken me longer than they normally would. You all can blame the recent influx of entertaining games I've been able to pick up. Especially Stronghold HD.

Mission 15 in that game can suck all the dicks, by the way.

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Chapter 30 - The Pink Condition

Chapter 30 - The Pink Condition

written by Fire Soul

Now, I would like to take this opportunity to remind you that I can speak Zebrikaans, which is the language that all of Zebrica speaks. When I decided I wanted to learn the language due to the growing relations between our two countries, I didn't just get books and tutors. No, Celestia took it a step further and sent me to Zebrica to learn through full immersion, with nothing more than books as a reference and actual Zebrican teachers talking to me like I was a stupid little foal just learning how to speak.

Instead of being sent to an institution for it, I'd actually been able to take it a step further and wound up going to class in a distant tribe that lived in the middle of the savannah. The conditions were primitive at best, but I hadn't become the pony I was at the time by bitching about the circumstances forced upon me. I had other studies I wished to do while I was there, and while Celestia found my request odd, she didn't turn me down. It was hot, the sun was unbearable most days, and water wasn't often as available as you'd expect it to be...but the mares there were lovely, so no real complaints from me.

While I was there, I got to learn about the tribe's culture, their unique customs, and many other things alongside learning their language. The children in particular loved having me around, if only because they found my magic endlessly awe-inspiring. How often do you think a Zebrican tribe living out in the savannah gets to see a unicorn? Not very often, I'll guarantee you that. I never saw another one outside of the two guards assigned to keeping an eye on me. I was Celestia's student after all, and I was on foreign soil. Zebrican warlords weren't known for going along with things like diplomatic immunity, or fearing the reprisal of foreign countries.

I can't actually remember their names off the top of my head. I think one of them was named Whisper Wind, but I'm not a hundred percent on that. I was far too busy trying to converse with the villagers using my limited knowledge of Zebrikaans at the time. That and trying to secure my privacy whenever I tried to wash up. Zebras were very much into that whole public bathing thing, mostly because unlike Equestria, the tribes don't really have a whole lot of things to shame each other about. I was the odd one out, always going through the trouble of bathing in private...well, what you can consider bathing. I had to boil the water and get used to washing up without the modern convenience of soaps readily available, though the occasional trader that wandered through usually had some I could trade for.

Fortunately, with non-profit organizations like the Red Cross making regular visits to the tribe, I could still get my hooves on my medicine, so that was a plus. Celestia actually set that up for me, bless her soul. It wasn't exactly the standard kind of medication the Red Cross would carry, but having a contact that's willing to carry a small case full of a month's supply wasn't hard to set up. Unfortunately, the Red Cross was also not going to just hand out opiate painkillers unless they absolutely had to, so once I ran out of those after a few months, I just had to tough it out and take it easy on the bad days.

The Red Cross is actually a good-will organization dating back more than nine-hundred years. For how peaceful we ponies are, the minotaurs were the ones that started it, once disease began sweeping through the Zebrican continent wholesale. It was the same continent they shared with the zebras, so why wouldn't they be concerned?

While they themselves weren't heavily effected, the zebras were dying out due to their lack of unity between their tribes back then, and the lack of things like penicillin. Them helping to fight off the diseases plaguing Zebrica kick-started the Red Cross's establishment as a worldwide influence, though they didn't explode into what they are now until they went overseas and both Equestria and Griffonstone began backing them.

So to make a long story short, life was fairly comfortable for me there, during my half-year stay. The tribe was more like a tiny town, and I met a few mares among them that were...well, let's just say that they didn't look down upon my unique gender. Actually, surprising as it may be to some of you that live in cushy homes in Equestria or other places full of all these demanding societal standards, the tribe I stayed at had absolutely zero qualms towards homosexuality of any sort, nor did they have problems with ponies like me. I know, it shocked me too.

Then again, I also landed a couple of those mares right at the start of estrus season...hmm. Okay, in my defense, zebras got da booty I like, and there's just something exotic about them, in my eyes. Not to mention, while my medicine helps me control my desires better, it's not going to somehow make me immune to the allure of mares in heat, and in a tribal village like that, with death waiting pretty much anywhere outside the village's boundaries, I didn't exactly have many places to run to in order to get away. I'm not saying that ponies are prone to rutting like animals during mating season, but the longer you're stuck around that intoxicating scent, the harder it becomes to say no.

I should really go back there and see if I have any illegitimate foals running around sometime. Or am I perhaps better off not knowing? I would also like to note that they have a very different way of thinking and a very different way of doing things, so for all intents and purposes, the legal age over there is generally whatever ritual the tribe puts their people through to prove they are colts or fillies no longer. Usually that age is anywhere from ten to fifteen.

Yyyeah....

Anyways, I'm getting off-track here. Point is, after I started to get a better grasp of their language, I began to really be able to understand the stories they told during those parties and get-togethers near the center of the village. Just a bunch of ponies gathered around a large fire-er, sorry, not just ponies, zebras too. That's really racist of me. Anyways, a bunch of zebras as well as a few ponies gathered around a big fire, retelling old legends and stories that may or may not be based in fact. The story of the Shamans, however, stuck with me.

The Shamans were an ancient tribe, crafty and cunning as could be, that held a large territory perfectly situated on the edge of the savannah, very close to water sources, and close to nearby jungle areas. We're talking...you know, a really long time ago. These days Zebrica's more forest and grassland than dense jungle. That territory was extremely useful for them, since it gave them access to a lot of rare ingredients that most other tribes could never get their hooves on, save through trade. It made them one of the largest tribes in Zebrica.

They were also one of the few tribes that preached a message of pacifism over conquest. Not just between neighboring tribes, but between all tribes, including those that would choose to attack instead of trying to talk first and establish more friendly relations. Unfortunately, that was their downfall.

The neighboring tribes were jealous and envious of them. Their preaching sounded more condescending than genuine to those tribes, and over time, it galvanized them into action. That's not to say that the Shaman tribe couldn't defend themselves. Their knowledge of potion-making was such that they could disable attacking hordes simply by throwing numerous sleeping potions and various other things at them that would force them to halt in their tracks. They weren't the greatest warriors, but their primitive alchemy was leagues beyond anything any other tribe had come up with...including the most coveted holy grail of potions ever concocted.

They managed to make a potion that most Equestrian mages could only dream of...an actual healing potion.

I'm not talking about a potion where you drink it and ooh, my headache and the pain in my joints feel better! I'm talking about a legitimate miracle potion that can heal almost any wound and, theoretically, any disease as well. That's only a theory because no one outside of the Shamans themselves has any idea how to make the damn thing. Outside of knowing that it's damn near impossible to pull off and it takes an absurd amount of work, care and general upkeep, we know nothing about it. Like many of their more valuable recipes, they absolutely refused to ever write the recipe down.

You can probably guess their alchemy knowledge was another reason the other tribes wanted to take their lands from them. Fortunately, the Shamans caught wind of the coming hordes, and rather than try to hold their territory against a force that even they couldn't fight off, they chose to burn all their recipes, pack up what they could carry, and...they scattered. They disappeared in the night in groups in all directions. When the hordes showed up, there was nothing for them to pillage. They took the land for themselves, and the Shamans escaped.

I'm sure the stories I heard were missing a lot of details, details I would've preferred to know, but what can you do when there are no reliable records written down anywhere? The stories are all you can really rely on at that point. Still, after I heard all those stories, I was intrigued. I wanted to know if there was any truth to this supposed miracle potion.

There is. Oh, there is.

Shamans were and still are unbelievably secretive. They raise their children often in secrecy, teaching them every single potion recipe they can while they're growing up. They want the knowledge burned into their memory so they never have to write those recipes down anywhere. At least, that's what little we've been able to glean off of the few Shamans less honorable ponies have managed to get their hooves on in the past.

There was actually a more famous incident around four-hundred and thirty-two...thirty-six maybe? Okay no, four-hundred and thirty-six years ago. There was a noble lord living outside of Canterlot that had managed to identify and capture a traveling Shaman that seemed to be alone. Nomadic, I guess you could say. Based on the testimonies of several ponies working at his mansion, he eagerly tortured the young Shaman to try and get him to spill his secrets.

Next thing they knew, a small group of four, bottles clattering under their cloaks, rushed through the front door and began shattering bottles full of a roiling blue-pink liquid that fizzled on the floor and turned into some kind of cloudy gas that put everyone to sleep. It was thick and cloying and filled the air in seconds. They managed to get the lord while he was settling down for his dinner. He faceplanted into his soup and drowned in it because there was no one that could help him. They were all completely asleep.

The Shamans took no prisoners, and did not intentionally harm anyone in their raid. They only came for their fellow Shaman. No bits were stolen, no jewelry was pilfered, not even their food stores were ransacked. They came, they collected their friend, and they left. It sent a clear message: don't mess with the Shamans.

Believe me, they could've done far worse with the time they had, after knocking every single pony in the mansion out. Can you imagine the havoc they could've caused if they'd done something as simple as mixing poison joke with the wine in the cellar? You don't want to know what that stuff can do to you if you ingest it. That's not even mentioning the numerous other kinds of concoctions they could've used. Equestria is barely scratching the surface of what's possible with potions in comparison to the Shamans no doubt, and even then we know they could've mixed some things up that could've left every single pony in that mansion in a far worse state. Ever heard of Scopolamine? You don't want to know. Yes, it's a powder rather than a potion, but it's not like potions were the only thing they knew how to do. It was just what they did best.

It's worth noting that that's the only documented case of a Shaman being responsible for anyone's death. They are very non-violent, and tend to run away instead of standing and fighting, unless they absolutely have to. Even then, they'd rather rely on crafty tricks and martial form to disable and flee instead of willingly causing grievous injuries.

It's also the only documented time when a Shaman had actually managed to get captured, and was also the only documented case of a Shaman causing someone's death, albeit indirectly and most likely unintentionally. I did say they were crafty.

This incident wasn't the only one of its kind, just the most well-known. This sort of thing happened off and on in multiple countries, as those in power eagerly went on a hunt to find the scattered Shamans, wherever they may be. They wound up torturing a lot of zebras that had absolutely nothing to do with the Shamans, or were related, but not entrusted with a Shaman's knowledge and wisdom. Fortunately, that sort of thing has died off in more modern times, if only because stuff like that is really illegal to do to anyone.

The most we ever managed to learn about the legendary healing potion was how you used it. You had to drink what was basically a full liter bottle of a semi-viscous liquid, and don't ask me how it tastes. You have to down the entire thing within a minute, or else the effects of the potion will be vastly diminished. The pay-off, however, is that any recent injuries, life-threatening or otherwise, will be rapidly healed as the potion gets into your system. That's leaps and bounds beyond anything medical science has been able to manage, if my broken snout at this point was any indication.

The Shaman that dared to part with that information called the potion 'The Fool's Errand'.

To put it simply, I have a great amount of respect for the Shamans. In a time when things were often kill or be killed, they sought unity among their people. They preached peace, they strove for it even when their own people refused to see them as anything more than another conquest. Even then they maintained their policy of non-violence as much as they possibly could. That takes balls. It's easy to let go of your morals and ethics in the face of overwhelming pressure or odds, but they never bent under all of it, even hundreds of years later. I applaud them for that.

Which was why hearing Pinkie call Zecora an evil enchantress really made my blood boil.

"Pinkie."

She continued to hop around me, looking me over. "Hmmmmmmm....!"

"Pinkie," I stated firmly, stamping a hoof for emphasis. "She's not an evil enchantress, and I won't tolerate you calling her that."

"Well that's just what an enchanted pony would say!" she said, pointing an accusing hoof at me. "How do I know you're not a mind-controlled thrall of hers now?!"

I sighed heavily and ran a hoof down my muzzle. "Pinkie...really? Do you not recall-what are you doing?"

I could feel her unique brand of mind magic at work. It felt almost childish as it brushed against my safeguards, and I blinked at the sight of Pinkie skulking low to the ground and waddling like a fucking crab around my left side. As soon as she was out of what I estimated would normally be my line of sight if I were still looking at where she'd been previously, she leaned over uncomfortably close to me, hovering her head and forelegs over my back.

"For all I know, you could be here to mind-slave me as well!" she shouted, drawing the attention of the few other patrons that had holed up in Sugarcube Corner as well.

I glared at her and leaned in, narrowing my gaze. "Do you not remember the discoveries we both made in the Everfree Forest? I mean, is this just because she's a zebra?"

She hmph'ed and removed herself from my personal space, marching back towards the front counter. "Pff-well yeah, she's a zebra, I know that. But she lives in the Everfree Forest! You can't tell me that's not weird."

"Pinkie, has she done anything to hurt anyone?"

"Well...no," she said, taking her position behind the counter once more. "But she might!"

"Has anyone ever tried, I dunno...just talking with her?" I asked, feeling the vein in my forehead pulsing as my frustration increased.

"What?!" she barked out at me in a half-shout, her ears flattening against her head. "And risk getting turned into some kind of voodoo zombie?! No way!"

I could feel my right eye starting to twitch already. Given what I had planned, this was not the day for that kind of bullshit. I did my best to calm down, taking deep breaths even as the delicious aroma of sweet baked goods began to thoroughly permeate my nostrils.

"Soooo...no one's talked to her, or anything remotely close to that," I deduced, approaching the counter. "What caused ponies to think of her in such a way?"

"Roseluck and Lily!" she stated, as if I was supposed to know who those two ponies were. "They said that she was talking to them in a weird way, and she was muttering some kinda weird chant in a different language while she was walking away from them. The next day, they both got sick!"

"Aaand you immediately jumped to the idea that she was...what, cursing them?" I asked, my voice flat as could be.

"No, Roseluck did!" she said, leaning over the counter towards me. "She said she could feel something weird happening to her while the zebra was walking away."

"Pinkie," I said, exasperated. "Pinkie. I can't think of a way to be gentle about this, so I'm just gonna come out and say it."

"Say what?" she asked, her natural innocence shining through once more.

I reached for her with both of my forehooves and cupped her cheeks, staring into her eyes. "You're an idiot, and every single pony that listened to this Roseluck is as well."

"Hey! That's not very nice," Pinkie said, batting my hooves away and frowning. "You apologize."

I shrugged at her. "I'll apologize when you talk to, uh...well shit, I didn't get her name either. Anyways, you have to apologize to her as well. Then I'll apologize to you."

"Fine. I'll agree to that," she said, pointing past me to my left. "But you do need to apologize to my customers."

I turned my head to spot two ponies that were eating in a nearby table, both of them giving me a dirty look. I met their gazes head-on, and after a tense moment, they backed down. I looked back to Pinkie, utterly confused by it, but she just gave me an even sterner glare while firmly pointing at them once again.

"What do I need to apologize to them for?"

"I don't know, but something you said upset them, I could see it from here," she stated, reaching over the counter to push me towards them. "Now go be a good pony and apologize!"

I sighed and did as I was told, though I had to wonder what made her think she could just tell me what to do. I approached the two at the table and put on a good ol' act of actually being sorry for what I said, while also instructing them in the clear difference between a Zebrican-Equestrian and a Zebrican. The zebra in question was obviously the latter, though I couldn't give a clear explanation as to why she spoke in rhyme. I had to just let that slide as a 'quirk'.

Even after that, they made it clear that that didn't prove she wasn't some kind of witch. Even though her strange way of speaking and her odd accent were clear indicators that she wasn't from Equestria, and she could've been saying anything when she walked away from this Roseluck mare. I think I lost a millimeter or two from my teeth, I was grating them so hard from their stupidity. I watched them leave while suppressing the urge to pick up the nearest baked good and throw it at the back of their heads.

Pinkie approached just as I slumped down in a seat, resisting the urge to bang my head against it. "There. That wasn't so bad, right?"

"No, it was only like pulling teeth instead of shattering them," I said, brushing a hoof over my mane while sitting up. "Sorry for insulting your customers like that."

"Uh-huh," she uttered, placing a plate with three cupcakes down in front of me. "It's fine, you apologized."

"Didn't get their names either. Ah well," I said, looking down at the plate. "What's this for?"

"For being a nice pony! Also because I'm sorry," she said, plopping herself down in a chair opposite from me. "I made you upset."

"No more than Rarity did yesterday. It's no big deal."

"Huh? What'd Rarity do?"

I shook my head. "Let's just say there's something about me that really bugs her and leave it at that. Something different from most ponies."

"Oh...well, that sucks," she said, frowning slightly. "Anyways, those cupcakes are chocolate with strawberry frosting, so dig in!"

I picked one up and bit into it. "Just what my belly needs. I'll have to burn this off later."

"Just do it the way I do it! Hop everywhere you go!" she said, her cheery grin almost face-splitting in its scope.

"...Huh. Actually, that would burn off a lot of calories, wouldn't it?" I idly mused while the delicious flavors of artificial strawberry and chocolate assaulted my taste buds. "I don't think I could handle it though. To say nothing of my bad hindleg."

"Yeah, probably not," she said, leaning the elbow of her foreleg on the table, resting her cheek on the flat of her hoof. "I've been doing wacky stuff since I was a little filly. It just comes naturally to me. Plus it lets me eat tons of sweets every day!"

"Mm. Yeah," I said, taking a moment to swallow. "You're definitely a very energetic mare, from what I've seen."

"Yeeeah! Not so much today though. My tummy hurts." she said, curling her other foreleg over her stomach.

"I'm guessing you fell victim to whatever happened yesterday in this area?" I asked, taking another bite of the cupcake and, upon realizing there was only a small piece left, stuffed the rest of it into my mouth.

She visibly wilted upon the mention of it. "Uh-huh...ponies got food poisoning from the free samples Applejack and I made."

"Called it," I said, swallowing what I had in my mouth in chunks, so as not to choke on it. "I had a feeling she was involved. She mentioned helping you out with something yesterday."

"Yeah, something must've gone wrong."

"Yeah, Applejack was what went wrong," I said, glancing down at my plate, eyeing the other two cupcakes. "You want one?"

I watched her face turn green for a moment, and she turned her gaze away from the sweets. "No, that's alright. Actually, the smell in here is making me queasy, but it's my shift to work the front counter today, so...just gotta deal with it."

"Try brewing some lemongrass into tea. It really helps soothe an upset stomach caused by food poisoning. I'd also recommend eating some raw ginger, aaand maybe drinking some peppermint tea as well, freshly-brewed from natural ingredients. Not store-bought tea bags."

"Lemon grass?" she said, blinking in confusion. "What's that? Ooh, is it grass that tastes like lemons?!"

"It's a kind of tall-growing, citrus-flavored, wide-bladed grass," I explained, taking another, smaller bite of a second cupcake. "Helps flush out microbes and other things that might cause...er, unfortunate, persistent visits to the bathroom. You can probably just eat it raw as well, but everything I've read suggests tea. Easier for your stomach to digest."

"That's neato! You really know your stuff!" she said, seeming just a bit more perky despite her sickness.

"Heh, thanks. I do read a lot," I said, clearing my throat as a bit of cupcake got stuck in it. "Uh, can I get some water?"

"Okie-dokie! Be right back!"

I watched her hop to her hooves in an instant, that energetic behavior coming back full-force as she headed for the kitchen. I watched her bounce up and down on her hooves, though not quite with the same vigor as she did when I first met her, and I couldn't help but think that that couldn't possibly be doing her stomach any favors. I was proven right immediately after she rushed back in with a glass of water for me.

The shift between jubilance and alarm was almost instantaneous. We both heard her stomach gurgle, her tail reflexively curled under her, and she ran off upstairs as fast as her legs could possibly carry her. I didn't want to imagine what was happening in the bathroom up there, but suffice it to say, I really hoped she made it on time.

Deciding to do something nice for my fairly new friend, I quickly finished my cupcakes while she was preoccupied upstairs and headed out to try to track down a store that sold what I needed to help Pinkie out. That proved to be harder than I expected, especially for a rural town. You'd think ponies out here would be all about the herbal remedies.

It actually took me a few hours to track a place down. Gave me time to ponder on the encounter with Pinkie Pie, at least. Specifically, it gave me a chance to think about when she'd done her little scuttle-walk around me while her mind magic brushed against my own. Based on past experience, limited as that experience may be, her unique brand of mind magic had the potential to tap into an unguarded mind's sense of perception, altering it and promoting certain feelings to fit Pinkie's agenda. Whatever that agenda might be, I don't think even Pinkie knows whenever it happens, since she has no real control over it.

The lack of control was particularly alarming to me. From what I could tell, she'd been doing this throughout her life without having any real control over what it did to her unintended targets, but thus far, she hadn't hurt anyone. At least, not from what I could see. I would have to peer into a few minds later to check. Mister and missus Cake seemed like good targets. They were around her the most. It would be a rather invasive look into their private lives, but, well...what they didn't know wouldn't hurt them. It's a secret to everybody.

My training with just about all kinds of magic has taught me that having control over what that magic is doing is the only safe way to use it. To not have control is to welcome absolute chaos to descend upon you. Just look at what happened to my revolver and my pistols when I clashed my magic against Nightmare Moon's. Telekinesis is the most innate thing that every unicorn has, and even something that basic and normal for a unicorn to use can go completely batshit once control is taken away. My guns getting crushed into a ball was a tame outcome compared to what could've potentially happened.

Now try to consider what uncontrolled mind magic could do to the psyche of a victim.

However, upon further pondering on the matter, it's statistically impossible that there isn't some form of natural control over what her mind magic does to the victim. From what I knew at the time, it had a basic pattern: pleasant positive influence on the victim's emotions, possibly to make them more receptive or compliant to her advances, and an alteration of the victim's perceptions.

I would need to do some studies in order to pick apart what exactly is happening to those influenced by Pinkie's antics, so once I found what I needed to help her with her food poisoning symptoms, I resolved to do something very risky and let my guard down. All defenses down, I would just let her in, whenever it happened. I'm more aware of the 'sensation' of mind magic influencing you, and while my defenses would be down, I would be all too careful about it.

I formulated a hypothesis as I returned to Sugarcube Corner. Ponies didn't seem to consider Pinkie's antics to be anything out of the ordinary, and if they noticed any unusual things due to her antics, I hadn't heard about it. I made a point of questioning several ponies I passed by on the way back just to be sure. Out of the twenty ponies I questioned, two of them noted that 'time seems to fly when Pinkie's doing her thing'.

That only made me put further faith into my hypothesis. While Pinkie can influence the minds of those around her without any control over when it happens or to whom it happens, there's no way she can influence the passage of time. While some would pass off 'time flying by' as just enjoying themselves in Pinkie's presence, I had a different idea, and it was because of the way she scuttled around to my side when I first arrived at Sugarcube Corner earlier.

I hadn't detected it when I first met Pinkie. The way she moved impossibly fast and in odd ways while in the air, and how she seemed to teleport around at the party they threw in the library when Spike and I arrived later that evening. She'd been influencing my mind without me realizing it at the time. That was the only explanation that made sense. That was just how insidious it was. For all I knew, I'd already fallen victim to it even after becoming aware of it without even realizing it at the time.

If she could influence someone's mind in a way that makes it seem like she appeared out of nowhere, that would mean that time would have to pass by in an instant from their perspective while it still passes normally to Pinkie. Maybe a few seconds here and there, not something that most ponies would notice unless they were habitual about checking the time. Even then, without knowledge of mind magic, how could they come to the same conclusion I had?

My hypothesis, of course, required experimentation, and in this particular scenario I could only depend on first-hoof experience of the influence. I can't fully describe how hard it was for me to let my guard down once I returned. As I've said previously, I have trust issues, and I was knowingly allowing someone direct access to my mind. I mean damn, I couldn't have started with some trust falls first or something like that?

As it turned out, I didn't have to wait long. Even as I got permission to go into the kitchen to brew some fresh tea for Pinkie, who was still upstairs, I remained aware and open. While I was doing that, Mrs. Cake went upstairs to let Pinkie know I'd returned with a few things that would help her out. She and her husband were really lucky they weren't around to feel the carnage those poisonous baked goods would've wreaked upon their digestive systems.

I kept my senses sharp as I heard hoofsteps upstairs. I looked at the clock and took note of the time, silently wishing I had some kind of stopwatch to help me in my endeavor. It was only a few seconds after I looked away from the clock that I felt strange. There was a dull sense of euphoria, a feeling of childish happiness that welled up within me out of nowhere. I could tell that it was due to my awareness of the influence that it had such a strong effect on me. Otherwise, it would've been more subdued. As it was, I couldn't resist the smile that began to spread across my muzzle.

This was exactly why I had to sit down and have a very long conversation with Cadance to make it clear to her that I never, ever, wanted to be the victim of her 'love magic'. That exact wording as well, which really offended her, but I had to make sure she understood how I felt about it. Really flowery way to dress mind magic up, if you ask me. I suppose we should all be thankful that her special talent isn't mind magic as a whole, or we would be fuuuucked~! Still, when I'm around her, I have no choice but to let my guard down just in case. Can you imagine the veritable shitstorm that could've descended upon me if I had to explain how I knew how to defend against her love magic?

"You actually went out and got me that stuff?! That's so nice!"

I nearly jumped out of my Celestia-damned skin. This was the first time I'd actually fallen victim to what would eventually become a standard for her...as in, popping up seemingly out of nowhere, and scaring the living shit out of me. Still, I retained my focus, and once I noticed her, I quickly turned my gaze to the clock. Six seconds had passed without me noticing.

I turned my head to look back at her, but she was no longer there. My eyes darted this way and that for what seemed like a few seconds, until my eyes passed over the spot next to me. Pinkie was there, with nary a sound or any evidence that she hadn't been anywhere nearby a second earlier. I looked to the clock again...seven more seconds. The presence in my mind was gone, and she seemed to have settled down. It really freaked me out, but I opted to leave my guard down, in case anything else managed to set her off.

"Whatcha lookin' at the clock for?" she asked, looking down at the tea I'd prepared for her.

"Experimentation to prove a hypothesis," I said calmly, gently tapping the side of my head. "So far, it's proving me correct. Regarding that thing you can do...."

"Thing I can do? What-...oooooohhh....!"

I watched her nervously pick up her cup and blow on it a few times before downing it all at once. I could only imagine the pain in her throat, but she seemed to take it just fine. It says a lot about how dirty my mind is that it instantly jumped to how much punishment her throat must be able to take. Burning your throat and having a cock thrust down your throat doesn't even mesh....!

"Soooo, uh..." she said, her eyes darting this way and that before focusing back in on me. "What was the experiment?"

"You didn't feel it?"

"Feel what?"

"Nevermind. Anyways, I reasoned that that thing you do has to cause time to pass faster for ponies, but only because their perception of what you're actually doing is altered," I explained, taking a sip from my own cup. "Thus far, my hypothesis is being proven correct."

"Oh. Well, okie-dokie then!" she said, grinning. "Anything else you could do?"

I tilted my head this way and that. "Well, I could do something. It's nothing too intense or invasive. I'd rather not do much more than that until you're a hundred percent again."

She wiggled around in her seat. "Ooh, sounds exciting! Okay, do it!"

"Uh...perhaps not here?" I offered, glancing around. "I don't think either of us wants anyone...you know."

"Oh! Sure, c'mon upstairs with me!" she said, hopping out of her seat and bounding towards the stairs.

I followed suit, the kettle of tea and our two cups in tow thanks to my magic. I was fuzzy on how much she'd have to drink before it began to make a difference, or how long it would take in general, but I hoped it worked soon. There was a childlike feel to Pinkie's presence that made the maternal side of me want to smother her with care. I was used to suppressing it a lot, but still, there it was. I suppressed it even further because, well, let's be real about this...regardless of her behavior or personality, it'd be awkward if I, her peer, began to treat her like a child.

She led me up to her room, pink bottom and poofy cotton candy tail bouncing up and down all the way. She couldn't have felt that bad if she was still that energetic, especially considering what happened just before I left. I watched her squee with glee, an actual squee, just as she hopped into the air and flopped down onto her bed. What caught my attention was the little alligator that got bounced into the air in the process. I hadn't seen him before that...at least, I thought it was a he.

The alligator landed on her chest, and she gave him a firm hug. "Hey, Gummy! Have you met Twilight?!"

Nothing but a blank, thoughtless stare was his response, but she seemed to glean something I didn't from it. Actually, the little gator was kinda creepin' me out. I didn't know how long she'd had that thing as a pet, but it couldn't possibly have been safe for her to be jostling him around and holding him that close to her body, let alone her face.

"Well, go say hello then!"

Aaand then she threw him at me.

Well, throwing is a strong term. She didn't exactly go Fastball Special on him or anything. This was more like a lob that just happened to send the gator straight for my face. I swore I saw death coming at me, open maw ready to chomp down on my throat. I didn't even have time or the presence of mind to light up my horn, it took me by complete surprise! I clenched my eyes shut and waited for the pain to come, my entire body tense with alarm and fear. I had no time to scream.

I felt the snap of a maw around my horn, and I shrieked in shock. It was squishy and moist and gross and oh sweet Celestia he's BITING MY HORN!! But strangely, there was no sharpness to it, not tinge of pain that comes with razor-sharp teeth snapping my horn clean off. No, instead I felt a weight shift and the grip loosen, before another snapping noise punctuated Gummy nomming on the back of my mane.

"Hee-hee! He likes you!" Pinkie said, breaking up the sound of my heart racing in my ears. "See? That's how he says hello!"

"Buh...whuh?" I muttered, glancing back at him, watching his blank eyes stare into the void while he held several locks of my mane in his slimy maw. "Wait, what? It felt like he didn't...I mean, I thought he bit me?"

"Gummy doesn't have any teeth! So that's why I named him Gummy," she said, rolling over onto her side, then laying flat on her stomach. "Get it?"

"Uh, yeah! Yeah, yeah I get it," I said, reaching back to try to grab him with a hoof. "How'd he lose his-"

A sudden jerk of movement from Gummy gave me a clear sight of his toothless mouth, the little gator snapping his jaws shut over my forehoof. I could feel him drooling over it, and the way his mouth was molding around the shape of my hoof to a certain extent made me remember the feeling of an old mare's mouth without her dentures in.

Don't you dare ask me how I know what that feels like.

I brought him down carefully to the floor and gently shook him off, staring at the small gator for a moment. He rarely blinked, even when I wiped my hoof clean on the blanket on Pinkie's bed and made a point of poking him on the end of his snout. It only added to the general creepiness of how still and generally idle he seemed to be. Usually you'd at least see a gator maybe...I dunno, inch a leg this way or that, or twitch their tail eventually. If I had just seen him in the store window, I would've mistaken him for some kind of poorly-chosen decoration.

"Gummy thinks you're super-spiffy, Twi-Twi!" Pinkie said suddenly, getting up and sitting on the side of her bed.

I looked up at her, then back down at the gator. "Ah. Well...nice to meet you too then, Gummy."

He responded the only way I think he knew how. He turned towards me and snapped his mouth shut on my foreleg, and made a couple of firm biting motions along it. I could feel his squishy gums through my sleeves and fur, and I had no doubt his slimy saliva was making a mess of that section of my clothes as well. Ew.

I used my magic to float him back over to Pinkie's bed, setting him down next to her. "Right! Now, a quick experiment, then I need to head out. All I need you to do is open your mind, Pinkie."

She stared at me in confusion. "Aaand how would I do that?"

"It's...huh. Right, okay," I said, lighting my horn up. "I'm going to reach out to try and touch your mind. You should feel it when I do it."

"Okay?" she said more as a question than an affirmation.

"When I do that, I want you to close your eyes and take a few deep, relaxing breaths. Try not to think about anything," I said, looking to her bed for a moment while I weaved an all-too-familiar array around the magic building in and around my horn. "You can lay down, if that'll help you relax better."

"Umm...sure, okay!"

I watched her lay down on the bed, forelegs curling around Gummy and pulling him close so she could snuggle him. The utterly placid gator took her attentions in stride, and I closed my eyes to focus on the spell. I didn't want to make any mistakes with this. This is very dangerous magic we're dealing with, and last thing I wanted to do was give her some kind of psychological trauma by accident.

At first, everything went perfectly fine. I touched her mind,and I could feel the natural barriers stopping me from entering. A mind is always guarded, especially against such an alien thing as another person's mind intruding upon them. I could hear her reaction, the rustling of the bedsheets and uncomfortable fidgeting all too telling of how this felt on Pinkie's end. I eased off for a moment until she settled down, ears perked and listening for a chance.

"I know it feels odd Pinkie, but don't worry. I'm not gonna hurt you," I said, clearing my throat. "Now, I'm going to do that some more, and I want you to take some deep breaths and focus on relaxing. Let the tension out of every single muscle in your body. If you need to visualize something soft and squishy, go right ahead. That helps for some people."

I continued to wait until I heard her take a deep breath, and as she exhaled, I brushed against her mind once more. I applied the smallest amount of pressure I could, and instantly, her defenses gave way. That wasn't exactly normal, in my experience. Usually a mind will put up significant resistance, even if you're willing to allow someone to connect with you, to say nothing of those that are entirely unwilling. Using mind magic on those ponies is often fatal if you force the issue, unless you disable their consciousness by putting them in a deep sleep or a hypnotic trance.

The way Pinkie seemed to just...open the door, that had me worried. Then again, this mind magic stuff came naturally to her despite not having a horn, so perhaps I was walking into somewhat unfamiliar territory here. I pushed on and delved just a little deeper, caution filling every 'step' I took.

I was right to be cautious.

Whatever thought or memory I brushed across, it was like stumbling through a tripwire. Everything about the way her mind worked was alien to me, and I couldn't make sense of any of it. Familiar paths and techniques to traverse her mind only made me slog and slow down, and I had an odd loss of individuality that became more prevalent the longer I stayed connected with her. Whatever I did to trigger her, it instantly flooded me with a rush of emotion that blocked out everything else.

Laugh. Laugh at everything. The world's better when you laugh and laugh and laugh and laugh and laugh and...smile. I should make others laugh! Wouldn't the world be a better place if everyone laughed at all the bad things and never let those bad things get them down?! It's the best feeling in the world when I see others give me a big, genuine smile! The rock farm was really a drag, but I love my sisters so-

Somewhere in the back of my mind, I could hear myself cackling uproarously with an unstoppable urge to laugh. It had completely overwhelmed me, and I was having a lot of trouble keeping a grip on myself. I felt the fleeting presence of memories that weren't my own invading my mind, and like a steel trap, my defenses went up. I snuffed those memories out immediately and rapidly took the array apart, trying to be as careful as I possibly could about it, but when you're laughing that hard...yeah. You get the idea.

When the spell finally came apart, I gasped for air and tried to take stock of my situation. I was collapsed on my side on the floor, chest heaving and my ears ringing. Side-effect of the overload no doubt. I could feel my heartbeat in my temples, and I was slowly becoming aware of a building, raging headache. Fortunately, headaches from this sort of thing tend to fade fairly quick in comparison to the usual methods, so I had nothing to really worry about on that front...though I would need to check myself out later to make sure there was no lasting damage.

I jolted up into a sitting position when I fully remembered my priorities. Nevermind what happened to me, I needed to be sure she was okay! I forced myself to my hooves and glanced at the bed to see her...well, laying there just the same as she was before her mind rejected me with the most bizarre defense I'd ever experienced. Save for her mane and tail. The normally poofy curly hair had gone completely flat.

"Pinkie! Hey-" I said in a hurry, stumbling on my hooves as a bout of vertigo threatened to topple me over. "You okay?"

"Y-yeah...yeah, I'm okay," she said, fidgeting in place. "I feel strange, and I'm not talking about the rumbling in my tummy."

"What's the strange feeling?" I asked, a knot tying itself in my stomach. "Do you feel something like a surge of emotions?"

"Kinda," she said, her voice subdued as she laid her head over Gummy's back. "I think it's from you."

"Alright. Listen, you have to-"

"Do you always feel like this?" she asked, fidgeting a little and tensing the muscles in her forelegs. "I don't know how to describe what I'm feeling...but I know it's sad. And angry. And violent. And lots of things that I'm not. It makes me want to do really bad things and I really don't like it! Make it stop!"

She was starting to panic, and if I didn't stop her, this could wind up becoming a worst-case scenario. I ignored the odd behavior of her mane and tail, and the implications of what she might've picked up from me, and instead quickly grabbed her with my magic and lifted her off the bed, setting her down firmly in front of me, forcing her to sit down. I sat down and grabbed both sides of her muzzle, forcing her to lift her head and look directly at me. I needed her full attention.

"Pinkie, I need you to breathe. Deep breaths, stay calm, I'm right here," I said slowly, patting her cheek with a hoof. "What you're experiencing is an emotional overload, though it's delayed on your end. Stop panicking, and...okay, think about things that make you happy."

She whimpered and I could feel her whole body shaking through her head alone. "Like triple fudge ice cream that I can share with fillies and colts?"

"Yes! Exactly that. Think about how happy they are when you do that," I quickly said, trying to play on what I could glean of her bliss-craving personality. "Oookay, how about, um, taking foals for rides on your back?"

That got a more genuine laugh out of her, though it was garbled by a few sobs, tears beginning to trickle from the corners of her eyes. "I-I've never done that, but I'd like to! Parents don't really trust me with their foals. They think I'm too crazy and random."

"Alright, alright, er...hoooow about..." I said, my eyes darting around the room before settling on Gummy. "Playing a game with Gummy? You two seem really close."

Despite the tears, I saw the corners of her muzzle lift into a wide smile. "Yeah! I like to throw a rubber ball into his mouth for him to catch whenever I'm taking a day off!"

"Okay, good. Just keep breathing. Now, what about...."

This went on for a few minutes longer. It didn't take too long for foreign emotions to filter out of a pony, but it still took longer if you didn't know how to reject them yourself. I got over what happened to me fairly quickly because, y'know, lifetime of practicing mind magic. Pinkie had no such training. All of her abilities seemed innate, and out of her control. I don't even think that retaliation against my intrusion was meant to be hostile or dangerous, it just sort of happened when I slipped up because her mind is...well, different.

"Okay, you okay now?" I asked her carefully, looking her over. "I am so, so sorry about that. That was entirely unexpected."

I blinked as I was suddenly embraced in a bone-crushing hug. I could almost hear my sternum creaking under the pressure of her innate earth pony might, but I knew her intent wasn't to hurt me. Didn't change the fact that I was having some trouble re-inflating my fucking lungs after that. I tried to return the gesture as best I could given the circumstances, but the best I could do was pat one of her forelegs with my hoof. Thankfully, the intensity of her hug let up, and I gasped for air as soon as I was able.

"It's okay, Twilight! Heh," she said, letting me go and wiping a stray tear from the corner of her eye. "Thanks for helping me out. What happened?"

"Well, your mind is...how do I describe it..." I muttered, tapping my chin idly while I got lost in thought. "It would take me ages to explain the intricacies, so I'll put it like this: a pony's mind is something I know. While yours shares certain similarities, there's something distinctly different about it, and that wound up being a serious problem. This sort of thing is why mind magic is illegal."

"What? There are other ponies with brains as weird as mine?"

"No no, that's not what I mean. Mind magic is really dangerous, and there's no real way to avoid that danger during experimentation," I explained, frowning. "And as you've just experienced, when mind magic goes wrong, it goes really, really wrong."

"O-oh. How bad are we talking here?" she asked, still trembling a little as she stood up.

"We got off lucky," I stated grimly, taking a few deep breaths to calm myself down as well. "I was at less risk because I was in control of the spell and I have experience dealing with this sort of thing. You, however, have zero experience in actively controlling it, if you're even physically capable of doing such a thing."

"What could've happened to me?"

"I'd rather not say. Nothing good, let's leave it at that," I said, standing up and clearing my throat. "We won't be doing this kind of experiment again. This was entirely unexpected and far too dangerous. I'll need to come up with a different way of studying your...well, your unique ability. I actually need to write down what little I experienced before everything went wrong."

Pinkie was silent for a moment as I worked to collect myself, before her forehooves tapped against the floor nervously. "Well, what could've happened to you?"

I really didn't want her to ask that question. It wasn't something I wanted to think about myself. That was the sort of thing you went off on your own and freaked out about after the fact, where the less knowledgeable wouldn't be able to see you and thus begin to freak out themselves. It was slowly beginning to occur to me that further investigation of Pinkie's abilities could cause her to fear herself, despite previous evidence showing that she would never intend to harm anyone.

I did of course know what could've actually happened, which was why I was going to make sure to check myself out as soon as possible. Probably before the nap I'd planned to take. There could be stray memories that, if not taken care of right now, could root themselves in my mind and potentially cause some serious complications later on. More extreme outcomes could've had my personality overwritten, for lack of a better term, by her own, partially or entirely. I can't even fully explain what kind of problems that could've caused for the pony I would've become at that point, because I have memories of being someone else entirely. Disassociative Identity Disorder doesn't even begin to describe it.

There's also the possibility that I could've gotten a second personality alongside my own that was also constantly aware and awake when I was. I think those are called tulpas or something. I shudder to imagine a Pinkie-style tulpa being omnipresent in my life.

"Nothing, Pinkie. Don't worry about it," I said, forcing a smile. "I'll be perfectly fine. Remember, I'm the one with the magic here."

"Your smile isn't very genuine...."

I sighed and shook my head. "It's really not something I want to talk about."

"Alright...."

I jolted when she lunged for me, those powerful forelegs curling around my neck and squeezing me tight. It was actually hard to breathe for another reason entirely now.

"One day, I'm gonna take that mask off," she said suddenly, breaking away from the choking hug and resting her forehooves on my withers. "Then I'm gonna make you smile for real."

I took a deep breath and stared at her, narrowing my eyes. "Pinkie...why did you say that?"

"No reason!" she said, grinning wide and leaning away from me. "I need to get back to work, and you need to get going to the market! That was where you wanted to go, right?"

"Pinkie, whatever memories you got from me, you need to forget them. For your sake and because I told you to," I said, walking towards her bedroom door. "You don't want to take those sorts of risks."

"Remember what?" she asked, her mane and tail still flat. "That you've killed ponies?"

I felt my blood freeze in my veins. The cheerful delivery of it, the vague lowering of her voice and tone...she knew things. Things I didn't want her to know, in any way, shape or form.

I spun around almost instantly, it felt like, staring her in the eyes. "Tell me exactly what you saw. I mean it, Pinkie."

She shrunk away from my gaze. "Y-you were a little filly, you wrapped a wire around a pony's neck and-!"

"What else?! Tell me right now!" I demanded, stamping a hoof against the floor.

She whimpered and shrunk down closer to the floor as I loomed over her. "Then another time, you used that magic to mess with someone's head and made her kill her friends!"

"Anything else? Anything at all?"

"No, that's all I saw, I swear!"

We stared each other down for what seemed like forever, the silence in the room becoming an almost palpable source of tension between us. I could hear Gummy's tiny claws clicking against the wooden floor as he waddled towards us, having climbed off the bed at some point. He let out a small, gurgly sound as he opened his maw, and it felt like the tension faded just a little when Pinkie grabbed him and held him close.

"You're not gonna do anything to me now...right?" she asked, her voice quiet and timid. "I didn't want to hide that I knew about those things...it sounded like that'd be a bad idea."

I stared for a moment longer before letting out a breath I didn't realize I'd been holding in. "No, I'm not going to do anything to you. I can't exactly blame you for this."

"Oh," she said, shifting uncomfortably in front of me. "So...we're okay then?"

"Maybe. Look, I have things to do, and this was a massive fuck-up on my part," I said, sighing softly. "I'm sure you'll want to know what those memories are about, and I promise that I'll tell you. Just don't talk to anyone about it."

"If I did, I'd hafta tell them how I know, and then I'd have to explain things I really don't want to talk about either, so..." she said, lifting a hoof and going through some familiar motions. "Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye."

"Thaaaat means it's a promise you can't break, right?"

"Yup!" she said, her mane and tail suddenly exploding into its usual poofyness. "Because a broken promise is the quickest way to lose a friend!"

"Heh! Well, alright," I said, glancing down at Gummy for a moment before looking back up at her. "Look, I'm really sorry. This wasn't supposed to happen, and I really hate to leave after that, but there's no way for me to safely check you out to make sure everything's okay up there. Not until I can figure your head out, and I don't know if I'll be able to ever do that without causing another incident."

"Oh...so, no more experiments?" she asked, her ears flattening against her skull.

"I never said that," I responded, glancing towards the door. "I have to explore all possible options before I can say that I'm completely incapable of figuring this out, and despite this setback, I'm even more intrigued than before."

"Okay! That was really scary though," she said, picking Gummy up and setting him on her head. "I hope that doesn't happen again."

"Same here," I said, walking over to her bedroom door. "I've got things to do, so I'll see you later, Pinkie."

"It's no problem, Twilight" she said, following me out. "I'll be fine."

"Alright. Make sure to drink more of that tea, too!" I said as we walked down the stairs leading back into the bakery. "It'll help you deal with the worst of it."

Pinkie had managed to recover some of that over-the-top exuberance I'd come to appreciate, since I first met her. It still got on my nerves in too large a dose, I figured that out from the start, but as it stood, I preferred exuberant Pinkie to sad and scared Pinkie. I wasn't even going to bother questioning what was going on with her mane. I was sure that wasn't a perception influence, since I hadn't felt anything at the time. That meant that whatever that was, it wasn't because of her mind magic.

I had really jumped the gun, as the minotaurs would say, going through with this impromptu experiment. Truth be told, at the time, I had no solid plan as to how I'd proceed to figure her unique traits out. How could I have ever predicted her mind functioned completely different from a normal pony's? All I'd done was probe her, the most basic kind of mind magic there is, it's practically a key component of just about every more advanced form of mind magic I know! How could I possibly proceed with my research if it only took a basic probing to set her off?

Not to mention the inherent risk of her learning things I really didn't need her to know. I was hiding my fear as best I could, but once I was away, I could feel myself trembling. My fears were compounded upon the fact that she could, and if I did it again possibly would, find out about what I'm doing. Unless she was a Celestia-tier liar, I believed she really didn't know anything aside from what she told me. But if she ever did learn anything...how could I keep her silent? I couldn't mess with her head, obviously. My only other method of keeping a pony silent was to, well...kill them.

You can probably see why that option was right out the fucking window.

I had to take my mind off of the whole matter. The open market served as a wonderful distraction, but it mostly only dealt in fresh produce, flowers and newly-processed goods. There were a few out-of-town vendors peddling trinkets, charms and tools, but none of that particularly interested me. There was a minotaur in the market selling a variety of more authentic things from the Republic, which also included some zebrican trinkets that drew my attention, but ultimately I bought nothing.

Instead, with my mind still buzzing about what happened with Pinkie, I resolved to get some parchment, any kind, and a set of pens...or quills, as the opportunity presented itself. I ran across that Quills & Sofas store, and I figured that that was surely just a clever form of marketing. There was no way a store could survive only selling two things in a small town like this, right?

I was wrong.

I left that store with a pamphlet on the uses of couches (who the fuck makes these?) and a bundle of quills, along with a few inkwells. The store owner tried to talk my ear off about the usefulness of a quality sofa, but I thankfully managed to slip away before he really got off onto a tangent. Still, I could respect his enthusiasm. Enough to possibly buy a couch from him for my new house back in Canterlot if I couldn't find a sofa that fit my tastes there.

The moment I got back to the cottage, I went to work at the kitchen table, trying to brainstorm for some solutions to the Pinkie predicament. Unfortunately, I got so caught up in it, as I am wont to do sometimes, that the next time I looked at the clock, it was about time for me to lay down and get a quick nap in. It was a good thing Fluttershy came in to ask me what I was up to, or I probably never would've looked away from my work. I organized it all into a stack and took it upstairs, putting it away in my suitcase before I laid down.

I had a long night of work ahead of me, and while I wasn't looking forward to it, it had to be done. After all, I'd already struck a deal with Granny Smith. I could only hope that everything went according to plan.

Author's Note

So! Who's tired of all this slice-of-life goodness? If you are, don't worry. It all serves future purposes, and soon we'll be getting back into the muck. Just a few more chapters.

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Chapter 31 - Drinks

Chapter 31 - Drinks

written by Fire Soul

I awoke to the sound of wind blowing and the distinct creaking of wood. It was distant and muffled, but I could still hear it just fine. The rustling of leaves outside accompanied the sound of crickets making their chirping racket, and unlike the city, it was almost impossible to let the noise fade into the background. It was everywhere, and given the fact that Fluttershy didn't put screens on her windows, I was willing to bet that several of those crickets were currently inside the house.

I felt a little sore, having laid around for a few hours instead of doing my usual wandering rounds. Even when I was being a layabout for a day, I usually spent my free time with Spike, or on my studies. Naps weren't a thing I really indulged in very often. I stood up after crawling out of the bed and went to brush my mane back into place, getting into my clothes before my brain really began to shift its gears into action. That was when I went through the painstaking process of switching into something a bit more casual out of my suitcase, which then required me to check my mane and tail again to make sure they weren't all mussed up and messy. I was going to work on a farm tonight, but I was also going out with a friend for drinks. No reason to look like trash before the hard work.

Fluttershy and Spike were downstairs in the living room, relaxing after what I was guessing was a long day. I wasn't really around. Spike was occupied with acting as a mobile acrobatics gym for a lot of the smaller animals that Fluttershy kept in the house, and I worried that he might step on one of them, but they were making a point of avoiding his feet. Angel was perched up on top of his tallest spine, watching the goings-on like a stalwart sentry guarding his kingdom. He spotted me and his nose wiggled for just a second, then he turned away, looking towards one of the windows.

Without much else to do besides giving Spike a parting kiss on the head (and a more discreet lip-lock with Fluttershy as I left), I headed off to Sweet Apple Acres to meet up with Applejack. Hopefully she was already waiting for me, or maybe if I got really lucky, we could skip the whole alcohol thing and she'd be passed out by the time I showed up. I wasn't going to hold my breath on that, but still, fools will cling to their hopes!

I walked past a patrolling officer on my way, while I was still on the less traveled backroads. The familiar blue uniform was standard, along with the sidearm and crystal taser he had, but the other thing...that wasn't standard equipment for a police officer to carry around. It looked like a strange headband with runes woven into it all around in a strange, intricate pattern that I didn't recognize. When I asked him what it was, he said it was a timberwolf repellant that you had to activate before leaving the station on patrol when you were travelling the perimeter of the Everfree, or anywhere near it. The runes went active whenever a timberwolf drew near, and if they got too close, it would let out a pulse of magic that the timberwolves hated. Interesting concept...I could see the use, though it was very specific.

Runes were such a complicated thing to use, even in this day and age. They're a unique form of magic that's a mix of artistry and intent upon their creation, and that's the best way I can describe it, honestly. A person that has the ability to craft runes may or may not craft the same runes as other people, and often times their rune designs will be entirely unique to them. One person's single-swirl circular spiral rune can give a blade a sparkling sheen, while another person's same rune could do something else entirely. I tried my hoof at it once, and considering I don't surround myself with runes, that should tell you how good I am at it. It takes years, often a significant portion of a person's lifetime, to get good enough at runecrafting to match up to the Royal Guard's standards. I may be good at magic, but runes are a different beast entirely. The mayor must've paid a pretty bit to get them those headbands.

I didn't think much on it after that, instead focusing my attention on my surroundings as I continued forward. Timberwolves must've been a genuine enough problem for them to invest in something that expensive, especially for a small town like this one. I guess waiting until the evening wasn't the greatest idea, being so close to the Everfree Forest. It was something I'd have to keep in mind for later.

Of course, there was the day before the previous day, when Fluttershy let me take her out to get something to eat with Spike and myself. Did she really feel that safe, having me around? Or was it far more likely that she wasn't intimidated by the possibility of timberwolves because she could communicate with them? I mean there was also the fact that she could fly if she really needed to, so...eh. It wasn't important. Just idle ponderings until I reached the farm.

They really needed to invest in some proper lighting on the pathway leading up to the farmhouse. It was only because I was being so aware that I noticed Applejack leaning against the fence near the entrance to the property. If I'd been paying any less attention, she could've easily gotten the jump on me, if she really wanted to.

"Howdy, Twi!" she said, trying to cover up a yawn and failing miserably. "Hoo-wee, sorry. You ready to get goin'?"

"Yeah, I'm good. Question is, are you?" I asked, giving her a once-over once we were closer to the lamp post a short ways away from the front gate. "You look exhausted."

"Ah, hush about that! Big Mac gave me an earful earlier," she said, batting at me with her hat in her hoof before plonking it firmly back atop her head. "I'm perfectly fine, and that's that!"

"Alright, alright..."

"Really, ev'rypony's makin' such a big deal about nothin'...." she muttered, hanging her head a bit lower than one normally would.

"Says the pony dragging her hooves like a drunk," I teased, smirking. "You sure you didn't dip into the hard cider stash before I showed up?"

She responded by snorting at me and giving me a playful shove with a hoof while we walked. "Aw, you hush yer hayhole! We'll see who's the tipsy one when we get to the bar."

Oh, we would see indeed. I am by no means a heavy imbiber of alcohol, not to the point of being alcoholic at least, but I do tend to enjoy a glass or two of wine every day, when available. I had no intention of matching her, but depending on how the night went for us, a drinking competition might've not been far off in my future. I was going to do my best to steer things away from that outcome, however, and I already had something in mind.

The bar Applejack took me to wasn't anything special, though it was located closer to the center of town. Right next to that weird bowling alley that didn't have a name, actually! That place still drove me up a wall. I made a mental note to get a Ponyville Yellow Pages JUST to see if that place had a fucking name, or even a listing.

The Grape Vine. An interesting name for a bar, but I wasn't one to judge. I'd been to bars with far worse names than that, and as I stepped inside, I realized I'd been to bars far seedier than this place. The decor was shockingly high-brow, with several expensive-looking paintings hung up on what looked like decorative hardwood walls, polished to a sheen. There was a noticeable lack of damage to the tables and counters as well. There were very few stains, and the ponies already there weren't making too much of a ruckus...and a lot of them were drinking wine as well as beer and liquor. Not all at once, but there was a variety from pony to pony. This was a place of mixed sophistication, and I made a point to remember to go there again.

AJ and I took a seat at the front counter, making small-talk that I don't entirely recall, but I know it wasn't anything of particular importance. The idle chatter of numerous ponies was punctuated by a round of boisterous laughter a ways down, and a call for another round of drinks. Ponies just seemed to know each other there, not too uncommon for a small town like this, but the feel of this place was different than what I was used to. Ponies showed no hesitation in approaching each other, chatting each other up and generally relaxing. Usually in a place like this, you relaxed, you got a drink, maybe some cigars or cigarettes, and you mellowed out. It had the appearance of a high-class bar, but the atmosphere of...I don't know, maybe an adults-only community center?

"Hey, Berry! Gimme a hard cider!" I heard Applejack call out, leaning her weight on the side of the counter, forelegs folded atop it. "One for my friend here too."

I turned my head just as a purple-ish mare approached. Her mane and tail seemed immaculately tended to, but there was a roughness to it. It seemed brushed, but several spots seemed a bit more pronounced than the rest, and the pattern wasn't random. It had to be some kind of stylistic choice. Perhaps she wasn't from Equestria? There were plenty of ponies that lived in the Griffonstone Empire, as well as the Minoan Republic.

"Hey, AJ. Who's the new mare you've brought to my fine watering hole?" she asked, grabbing two glass mugs from under the counter.

Applejack quirked a brow. "Ya don't recognize her?"

Berry leaned against the counter and looked me over a few times before looking back to Applejack. "Can't say I do. She looks kinda blurry to me right now. You know how it is."

"What, yer drunk already? Dang," AJ said, taking her hat off and setting it down on the seat next to herself. "Shouldn't you be cuttin' back? Yer filly's...what, eight now?"

Berry groaned and shook her head. "Oh, don't be that pony tonight, AJ. I know you're exhausted, but don't take it out on me."

I quickly interrupted them. "You're drunk and you're not even remotely slurring your words? That's actually impressive."

Berry smiled and nodded to me. "Glad someone can appreciate my skills. I tend to import the beers and liquors, and of course the Apple Family's ciders. The wine, however? I make that myself."

"Wait, how do you manage that?"

"Well I own and operate a small grape farm for one," she said, picking up a cloth and gently cleaning off each of our glasses. "I crush and ferment my grapes there too. As for why I'm drunk...well, I've been doing lots of taste-testing since I turned eighteen."

"Pff. By taste-testin', she means she's been drinkin' whole bottles of the stuff since Apple Bloom was born."

Berry huffed and snapped the cloth at Applejack, batting her across the snout. "Oh, hush! Point is, I'm a connoisseur. I know my wines better than anything else. I've been drinking wine since I was old enough to be legally allowed to do it. That's why I can handle my alcohol better than most."

"Huh. Isn't it illegal to be drunk when you're working?" I asked, taking a moment to look around the room.

"I own the place, I can do whatever the fuck I want," she said, rolling her eyes. "Unless someone decides to rat me out, it's not an issue."

"Alright," I said, turning my attention back to her. "Well, we haven't really met, so. I'm Twilight Sparkle."

"Ooh, the big new Equestrian savior, in my bar? It's an honor," she said, quickly pointing back and forth between Applejack and myself. "You said hard cider, right? I'll get some of the good stuff from the back. First round's on the house!"

I quickly shook my head. "Oh, no no, you don't have to do that!"

Berry didn't miss a beat as she walked away. "Of course I do! I got a bonafide hero in my parlor, why wouldn't I treat her to a drink?"

Considering how mellow it was in there at the time, Berry's rhetorical question garnered a lot of attention. I could only guess that Applejack's presence in the bar was more generally accepted by the patrons that made regular visits, since they didn't make a big deal out of her entering the bar in the first place. The news, however, seemed to focus on my deeds more than the others because of who I was and what I managed to do when faced with the overwhelming might of an alicorn. Naturally, news of another hero showing up at the bar drew a lot of eyes my way.

Berry came back shortly after with a big bottle of top-quality hard cider, manufactured at Sweet Apple Acres, and poured us both a mug. "There ya go ladies, just let me know when you want more. By the way Applejack, you look like shit."

Applejack gave her a death glare and downed half her mug in one go, much to my surprise. "Gee, thanks, Berry. Salt o' Equus, you are."

"Well, if you'd let Rarity do something with your mane like I've told you to, I wouldn't have any reason to say things like that!" she said, her faint smile fading as she set the bottle down in front of us. "Seriously though hun, you look really bad. You okay?"

"Ah'm fine. Promise." Applejack growled out, the venom in her tone brooking no argument on the matter.

Berry held a hoof up in mock-defense. "Okay, okay! No need to snarl, hun. Just making sure the supplier of my finest cider isn't falling apart on me."

Applejack grumbled and nodded, waving her off. She left without complaint, while ponies began to casually sidle up to the seats next to mine and AJ's. Next thing I knew, we were getting bombarded with questions left and right about the events surrounding what was quickly being referred to as the Eternal Night. The name wasn't very fitting if you asked me, since it didn't really last all that long, maybe an hour or two longer than it should've, but hey, what can you do?

Soon I was recounting the events step by step as we made our way through the Everfree, the bottle of hard cider quickly being drained as Applejack and I both chimed in on the story back and forth. Most found the moment when I was hanging off the side of the cliff the funniest, while everyone seemed to be teetering on the edges of their seats when we recounted the battle with Nightmare Moon. I'd already explained it all to the news reporters that got their pound of metaphorical flesh out of me, but there was something to be said for hearing the story straight out of the pony's mouth.

It was kind of an awkward situation for me, honestly. I'm not one for having a lot of attention on me, and I'm not the best storyteller in the world. I particularly don't like sensationalizing my actions, however noble they may have been, though attending court and mingling with the nobility has made me somewhat graceful at it. Lies were a staple of their silly social and political games, after all. I suppose I'm just not the 'traveling bard' type.

Applejack, through all of this, was drinking rather liberal amounts of hard cider, and some of whatever some of the other ponies in the bar bought for her. I would've warned her about mixing drinks like that, especially since she was downing them so quickly, but getting her utterly smashed was the whole point, so...yeah. I kept on telling the story, she kept on drinking.

Despite her state, she was handling her booze very well. Far better than I could, though I was sure it was just that some of it hadn't really gotten into her system yet. Not to mention, she hadn't drank nearly enough to get passed-out drunk, and I needed her so drunk that she wouldn't wake up if I wound up making too much noise in the orchard by mistake. I was afraid I'd have to bust out my trump card.

I was hoping that the unexpected demands for a story would hold us long enough for Applejack to get drunk enough that she'd pass out without me having to do this. As it turned out though, we finished the story far too soon for my liking, and the sight of Lyra and a small band up on the stage in the corner meant that we couldn't be hogging the spotlight anymore. So we both settled in and Applejack began to slow down on her alcohol-chugging. I couldn't believe that she was still awake, with how tired she looked.

I'm still really sorry I brought this up.

"So, Applejack...what happened to your parents?" I asked slowly, taking a quick swig of my drink, the gentle warmth of alcohol spreading through me.

The gentle tunes of a guitar being strummed began to fill the bar, while the background noise of other conversations began to die down around us. I found it a bit strange that she didn't have her lyre with her up there, but it quickly became apparent to me that she'd changed since I'd known her. Apparently having a set of pipes had at some point been added to her repertoire, and I couldn't help but listen for a moment. The song was hauntingly simple in its composition, but the simplicity was what sold it for me. Easy and relaxing to listen to...even if it had a bittersweet history.

When those walls came crashing down, ponies on both sides, rebels on the outside and inside of Stalliongrad were utterly jubilant and filled with relief. The old regime, as hated as it had become, was easy for them to mock, in their joyful fervor. Songs were written, plays were made, some in good taste and some not. I liked the book about how one of their leader's father beat him, so he decided to take out his hate-boner on the rest of his country instead. Not exactly an unbiased book, but it's pretty cathartic. The particular song that Lyra was singing though...that was a bitter, but respectful one. It wouldn't be something I'd normally listen to, but in a bar, just relaxing after a long day, it was both pleasant and soothing.

When I returned my attention to Applejack, her relaxed and cheery demeanor had faded entirely. Despite the drunken glossed-over look in her eyes, she appeared pensive and thoughtful, and she quickly poured herself yet another mug of cider. The ponies that had crowded us began to give me a nervous look, the few pegasi among the crowd flitting their wings and backing off. They all seemed intent on giving us our space now.

"Why you askin' about stuff like that, Twi?" she asked quietly, not wanting to talk over the music too much. "We was havin' a good time."

"Oh! Heh, dunno..." I said, holding up my mug. "Must be the drink loosening my tongue. Your grandmother and I talked, she got to talking about her parents and her husband, and when I asked her about your parents, she just said they weren't with us anymore. Said it was on your withers to tell me about it."

"It ain't a story I like tellin'..." she muttered, downing an entire mug's worth of hard cider in one go. "Why do ponies always ask me about 'em?"

"Hey, I'm sorry! If you really don't want to talk about them, that's fine," I said, turning around in my seat so I could lean my back against the side of the countertop. "But I'll admit, I'm curious."

Truth be told, I didn't need her to tell me. I just needed to get her thinking about it. It was cruel of me, but depressed or sad ponies tended to find their way to the bottom of a bottle a whole lot faster than ponies just looking to relax and have a good time with their friends. They find comfort in making a pleasurable attempt to forget once more. The inebriated joy that comes with feeling good and not being able to think straight is a siren's song to them.

She was no different. She was downing those drinks a lot faster now, and things had become uncomfortably quiet between us. Drink after drink disappeared down her gullet while I took my time, the minutes ticking by while song after song was sung on the stage. Lyra was just as eager as the crowd seemed for an encore, because she took to the stage again and sang the exact same song, mellowing the room out all over again.

"My mama died durin' childbirth."

I almost didn't hear her speak, she'd been quiet for so long. She sounded just a bit slurred, and her head wobbled this way and that while she tried to glance over at me. I quickly turned in my seat to face her, resting my forehooves on my cushion, giving her my full attention. Last thing I wanted to do was be in swinging distance of a very strong earth pony while she's upset and utterly smashed. I didn't need my snout broken a second time.

"She gave birth while I was still pretty young, an' she wanted to have Apple Bloom on the farm," she said, staring down at the countertop. "Things were goin' fine 'til Apple Bloom was out. That was when the bleedin' started."

I could see her shivering, and even in her drunken state, I could see the fear in her eyes. It was the kind of fear I used to know, until I'd found a certain joy in my work. I couldn't really empathize with her in that regard anymore, but I remember what it feels like. When you see that much red flowing out of a pony's body, the natural response is to panic. That kind of fear leaves a mark on you.

She raised a hoof in the air and looked over at me, making a sweeping motion with it. "There was just so much of it, and I didn't know what ta do! Mah daddy ran out the house to get some help, but by the time he got back, it was too late. My mama was dead in a matter o' minutes."

"Oh, sweet Celestia..." I mumbled, shaking my head slowly. "I know that complications can arise during childbirth, but...damn."

"When the doctors showed up, they tried everythin' they could to revive 'er, but there was just...there was nothin' they coulda done," she hissed out after partially choking on a big mouthful of cider. "If she'd given birth in the hospital maybe, but there was no guarantee. She lost a whole lotta blood way too fast."

I couldn't imagine that situation. Well I mean I could, but I had parents I could actively hate. The idea of my mother just being stolen away from me by death without any rhyme or reason to it, on a day when I'm supposed to be celebrating...that's fucked up. That gave me a whole new level of respect for Applejack.

She took another deep swig from her mug, grimacing. "Then my daddy, he...heh, fuck! He just gave up. Acted like nothin' mattered no more, started stayin' out late in bars, comin' home real drunk. Didn't get physical or nothin', even when Granny chewed 'im out for it. He just hung his head and silently went into his room. Barely did any work on the farm. Got to the point that Big Mac and I started havin' to stay home from school ta keep things runnin'."

I watched her sad features contort into a scowl, the mare glaring holes into the countertop. I made a point to brace and prepare myself to bolt out of my seat. There was no telling what might set her off.

"I didn't hate 'im for it, not at first. Ah understood. I was angry, and buckin' trees just wasn't lettin' me get it all out, so I started takin' it out on those around me," she said, laying her forehead on the bar. "Granny an' I got in so many arguments, me n' Big Mac got in hoof fights all the time over it. I wanted ta blame someone, but weren't no one I could blame for what was happenin'."

"Except your father," I guessed, picking up my mug and taking another drink myself. "Emotions are illogical like that."

"Yer right about that," she said, slowly swaying backwards and almost falling over before her forehooves clonked down on the countertop to help her steady herself. "I started blamin' him once the farm started fallin' apart more. Big Mac wasn't goin' ta school at all anymore, an' he couldn't keep up with it all on his own. My daddy wasn't pullin' his weight either, not like he shoulda been. Was like he was in a trance I couldn't get 'im out of."

I simply waited for her to continue as she downed another mug's worth of her hard cider. She was beginning to sound more and more 'country' with every slurred word, and her eyes looked glossy and unfocused. Tell-tale signs of a drunk pony taking in way too much booze for their own good.

She waggled her mug towards me, the liquid still inside sloshing about noisily. "An' then! Then one night, he just doesn' come home, an' we figgered maybe he finally up n' left us, or killed 'imself. Don't know which woulda been worse, but turned out, it was neither. Next day, police showed up with my mama's hat , and I knew somethin' bad happened."

"Your mother's hat? Why'd he have it?"

"He started wearin' it all the time after she died," she said, slumping against the counter. "They found it in the grass, 'long one o' those roads closer to the Everfree Forest. Lots of blood in places, lots of claw marks, the fence on one side was all busted up...he gave 'em a fight, but they won."

She swayed in her seat and grimaced, hiccuping a few times. I could tell she was beginning to reach that point, and I mentally prepared to catch her if it wound up being necessary. Perhaps if I was lucky, she'd just faceplant on the bar and I wouldn't have to hassle myself. Not like it'd be hard to catch her, just, y'know. I was fairly tipsy by that point, pleasantly buzzed, no guarantee my magic's going to work like it should.

"Tha's the only reason I have any respect left for 'im. Fer all his faults an' how bad he failed us when momma died, he kept goin' even though he had nothin' left in 'im. He put up a fight when death came a-knockin'."

Her eyes closed for only a moment before she leaned her weight towards the bar again and leaned on it, as if it were the only ground in the sea she was currently sloshing about in. I took some time to down the rest of my mug before setting it aside. I watched her reach up to rest a hoof on the rim of her hat, adjusting it until it was sitting just right on her head again.

"I was so mad...wanted ta burn that whole dang forest down," she grumbled, almost inaudible to me. "I felt somethin' real dark in me that day. Didn't care 'bout the consequences. Just burn it all, watch those fuckin' magic wolves die...fuck all of 'em."

I watched Lyra step down from the stage, the rest of the band taking over from that point on. "Is that why you wear it now?"

"Eeyup!" she said a bit louder than I would've preferred. "Ah was already failin' school, so when daddy was gone too, I just...decided ta throw all mah focus inta keepin' that farm runnin' an' runnin' real good! Couldn' leave it all ta Big Mac, he was...he was...."

I only tried to catch her when she leaned back and flopped clean out of her seat. Short of cracking her head, I caught her in my magic and floated her there. Her eyes were rolling in her head and I could tell from how she was going limp in my grasp, she wasn't going to be very aware of her surroundings for much longer. That or she might start throwing up a lot. She was really starting to knock those drinks back once she got started. I suppose Granny Smith called it.

Unfortunate, since I wanted to know the names of her parents. Other things as well, like whether or not she or Big Macintosh ever finished school. They're clearly competent if they can efficiently maintain a farm between just the two of them. Questions to be asked later I figured, and while Applejack's collapse had drawn some attention, most ponies paid us no mind. Berry had come over, fairly concerned, but once she was sure everything was okay, she let us be.

We lingered in the bar for a time, with me laying Applejack's upper body against the counter. I had to keep hold of her to stop her from falling off, and she began to let off some light snoring, but it was fine. I waited for a solid fifteen minutes to see if she'd wind up vomiting all over herself, but no dice. Thank goodness for that. At least thanks to the booze, I wasn't feeling an ache in my hindleg, though I dreaded the possibility that carrying her back to the farm might change that. I couldn't take my medicine after drinking all that alcohol. Good way to wind up six feet under.

As soon as I began to set Applejack's significant weight down on my back however, I was quickly interrupted by several other patrons that seemed far too eager to help me out, if I needed it. The kind of life I'm used to, anyone offering you help without any prompting or expectation of monetary or carnal reward was very suspicious simply on principle. It was rare for ponies to just do something like that if they didn't have a driving force behind the action, be it selfish or calculated.

Ponyville was a very different place, however. Similar in a few ways, such as the bigotry I'd encountered earlier, but everything else was entirely different, almost otherworldly to me. The altruism the other Bearers had shown to me, someone they barely knew, at the risk of their own lives, not to mention the distinct lack of noticeable crime in the town...most everyone I'd met was way too nice for their own good. A pony like myself could swindle them with ease, and business isn't even my specialty!

I decided to give these ponies a chance, if only because I wanted to give the town another chance to prove itself to me. To make a long story full of starstruck ponies asking me questions upon questions during the entire walk to the farm much shorter, it paid off. No hint of them expecting more out of the act, no lingering, they just headed home after I picked Applejack up off one of their backs. I carried Applejack the rest of the way to the farmhouse and found Granny Smith waiting for us to show up in the living room.

Applejack was out like a light. No amount of jostling or noisy talking seemed capable of waking her up. I was certain that the mother of all hangovers was going to be waiting for her in the morning, but for now, she was getting the sleep she desperately needed. I was actually surprised she managed to remain as coherent as she did all throughout the evening, given how exhausted she already was.

Big Mac carried her upstairs to her room, and came down a few minutes later, ready to help. He didn't have his yoke on, which seemed significant to me after always seeing him wearing it previously. Actually, I hadn't seen him wearing it since I'd come back to Ponyville. Probably had something to do with his injury, I figured. Maybe it was too heavy for him to just wear around after pulling those muscles, or whatever it was he did to himself?

We left after he retrieved a small scroll container from one of the drawers in the end table next to the couch in the living room, as well as picking up the lantern Granny Smith offered us. He tied it to the same strap he'd secured the container onto around his barrel, and we both left without a word. That was fine with me. He really didn't seem like a stallion of many words.

Still, we had to converse in order to get any work done. Thankfully, that scroll container with the map saw a lot of use as he explained the grid system they used to separate chores and work between the two of them, as well as leaving some of the chores to Apple Bloom. The areas marked off with a marker were the sections that Applejack had managed to clear out on her own, and as a testament to her fortitude and stamina, I will say that she got a whooole lot done, like way more than I expected with the state she was in. Talk about applebuckin' legs.

Regardless, there was a lot left to do, and I had the task of getting it done in a single night. While most would consider such a task daunting, I was already putting together a layered array that could sustain the kinds of spells I'd need to cast. First things first, however...I needed to get the baskets. That meant spending a significant amount of time going back and forth from the barn with a cart full of baskets, but I needed them all in specific locations that I could reach in short order to keep the spells charged and going. With any luck, this wouldn't be too exhausting for me.

First, I wove arrays over the baskets as I set them down, filling them with a simple light spell that could act as a beacon for what I intended to do with them next. The spell wasn't nearly strong enough to make them emit light, but it was perfect for the next part of my plan. Big Mac found it strange that we were walking all over the farm just setting baskets down, but once I explained that it would 'make this easier for me', he just went with it. The draw on my magic was minimal for them, but they weren't the only part of what I had in mind.

After that, I took the time to go around identifying each tree, the hanging apples in them glowing with earth pony magic. The trees were filled with it as well, making them easy for me to see despite the darkness. I constructed multiple arrays in each area and wove a number of spells into them, identifying the apples as the targets and the baskets as the intended location those targets needed to be dropped off at. You can imagine that this took a couple hours all on its own, and they were a far larger draw on my reserves.

The end result was something almost akin to a conveyor belt in every grid section of the farm, at least, the sections that still needed to be harvested. The baskets were filled quickly in several places, but I'd made a point of figuring out a path to follow on their grid to ensure I'd show up shortly after the baskets were filled, so I could show up and replace them. I wasn't concerned with getting the harvested apples into storage immediately. I just needed to get them out of the trees. Carting them back to storage would just be more like cleaning up after a job well done.

"Stars above, that's some fancy magic you've got there, Lady Sparkle."

I chuckled and tried to hide the strain sustaining so many arrays was putting on me. "Heh, well, I'm a mage, so...yeah. Fancy magic's my thing. Please just call me Twilight."

"Well yeah, but ah ain't never seen nothin' like this," he said slowly, deliberately. "This is somethin' else entirely. Sorry."

It was actually hard to maintain a conversation with him when I was preoccupied sustaining the arrays as we came upon them. They were designed to hold themselves together, but there's no such thing as a 'permanent array', save for some of those spoken of in legends, and those weren't so much arrays as they were ponies that knew nothing about magic writing like they did know. The difference with these arrays is that, while they're designed to hold themselves together, they still rely on the caster's concentration and mana reserves, and even then they won't last forever. In comparison to, say, an array designed to form a fireball and then carry it to the target, these arrays were demanding my constant attention lest they fall apart on the spot, and the further away from them I got, the harder it became to keep them stable.

"It's a shame Applejack's so stubborn," I said quietly, glancing around the orchard. "If she'd just hired some help a while earlier, we wouldn't be here."

"Eeyup. That's just how my little sis is," he said, rubbing the back of his neck as we walked. "We could've used more hooves around last year too."

"More earth ponies, I'm guessing?"

"Now that's a common misconception about farming," he said, pointing at my horn. "Even if the help wasn't some fancy mage and just a normal unicorn, there's a lot of jobs around here a unicorn would be real useful for."

"Oh really?" I asked, quirking a brow. "Like what?"

He flashed a brief, but wide grin as a thought came to him. "Well, cleanin' up all the cow manure, for one."

"Why would that...oh. Oh. Oh damn," I said, unable to hold back a small laugh. "Now I feel sorry for you. Please tell me you don't manipulate the shovel with your mouth?"

He glanced off to the side, away from me. "Well...if'n it makes ya feel any better, I usually brush mah teeth a second time whenever I gotta do that. Sometimes you need more leverage."

I cringed and fought back a shudder. "Oh, eww....!"

He just laughed and let me be for a time, my entire focus returning to the task at hoof. We tried to make small talk here and there, but opportunities for me to be able to speak were few and far between. His slow manner of speech seemed purposeful, and I could only assume there was a reason for it. Applejack certainly didn't talk like that, and neither did Apple Bloom or Granny Smith. It was an anomaly among a family of natural-born farmers, and I was always a curious sort.

"Big Mac, I'm just curious," I said slowly, struggling to form words and work through the arcane mathematics needed to re-assemble one of the layered arrays that had fallen apart. "Why do you talk like that?"

"Like what?" he asked, staring at the ball of light I was examining.

"You speak very deliberately, like you're thinking about every word you say," I muttered, carefully weaving two layers back together so the array could work again. "I'm just curious. No one else in your family talks like that."

"Oh, I see. Well," he said, pointing towards Canterlot. "When Applejack and I started workin' the farm, I was the pony with more presence on the farm. That and ah'm good with words, an' ah'm better at dealin' with them businessponies. AJ can't stand a liar."

"That doesn't fully explain it..." I said, tilting my head as I finished pulling the array back together, the ball of light floating off to pluck more apples. "How does speaking slowly and deliberately help you?"

He shrugged and watched my spell fly off. "When I talked quicker like that, my accent came out more. Ponies with big money and big opportunities didn't want to deal with some country bumpkin most of the time. So I started talkin' slower, speakin' more eloquently. Couldn't get rid of mah manner o' speech entirely, but I guess it became more charmin' that way or somethin'. There were a few ponies that said I sounded 'charmingly rustic'. Whatever that means."

I smirked and stood up, motioning for him to follow. "Well, they just mean that you have a pleasant tone to your voice. Very calm and old-timey."

"I suppose I'll take that as a compliment. Anyway," he said, tilting his muzzle up as a light ball surrounded by apples floated past. "What were you doin' with that thing?"

"Oh, my spell? I was performing upkeep on the array," I said, frowning. "Maintaining my concentration on all of the ones we have spread over the farm is very taxing. That's why I'm starting to talk much slower than I normally would."

"Yeah, ya sound kinda distant. Like you're daydreamin'," he said, looking around at all the floating lights leaving trails behind them as they moved. "How's all this work, then? What's it like?"

"Hm, how can I...ah," I said, stopping as I pulled another array down to repair the degradation on it. "Imagine that you have numerous papers to fill out, and the ink you have to use slowly disappears over time. You write it all out as quickly as you can, but you have to keep re-writing the things you've already written, because the ink continues to disappear. That's what this is like."

"That sounds mighty frustratin'."

"Oh, also, the papers are made from magic, and if your concentration wavers from them too much, some of them will disappear," I added, quickly doing a few calculations in my head. "Forcing you to start over entirely. Also, you become more and more exhausted the longer you keep the papers in existence."

"You know, that just makes me glad I was born an earth pony," he said, sitting down while he waited for me to finish my work. "Bein' strong ain't so complicated."

"Yes, well, if I'd been born an earth pony, I'm sure my life would've gone in a very different direction too," I responded idly, sending the ball off into the air again once I finished. "There we go, maintenance done for this section. Let's keep moving."

"As ya say, Lady Sparkle."

"Twilight."

"Sorry."

The job, suffice it to say, got progressively harder as the night went on. I started to get tired, I started to get bored, and a pony can only remain focused for so long while moving around. Even Celestia herself had limits in that regard, to say nothing of myself. Boredom was one of the worst distractions, as thoughts of doing anything other than sitting there and retaining constant calculations and concentration began to cause me to lose several arrays around the farm. It slowed me down, and I had to repeatedly take the time to put together new ones, even as I got more and more tired.

The drain on my magic was only making things worse. Instead of physical exhaustion, I felt sluggish and light-headed as my reserves began to run out. The hot meal Big Mac brought to me halfway through the night helped, but food only helps your mind function so much in such a state. If anything, the hot meal just made me feel more tired, as many do after a good meal. Just roll over and fall asleep, y'know?

By the time everything was finished, I was thoroughly worn down. I barely had any magic left, and finally being able to let all of the arrays fall apart and stop drawing on my dwindling reserves was like having pressure crushing in on your head from all sides, only to suddenly and blissfully release you all at once. At least I didn't need Big Mac's help to make it back to the farm. It was...huh, that's surprising. I remember the exact time it was when I finished. It was 5:36am by the time I was done.

Unfortunately, that didn't leave me a lot of time to rest up, and I couldn't risk taking a nap. If I conked out, I might not be able to rouse myself in time to meet with the Shaman, and it wouldn't be particularly satisfying sleep anyways. Eh, I'd stayed up for longer times than this. The exhausted feeling I was fighting through brought back memories of a stake-out in Baltimare, and that was two days of me staying awake waiting for some help so I could get some Celestia-damned sleep. Compared to that, this was nothing.

Of course, that didn't mean I could just up and leave. Big Mac told me they were normally up at around six sharp, sometimes later depending on the chores that needed to get done, but Applejack was pretty much a guarantee. I was in the middle of nibbling on some toast that Big Mac had thrown in the toaster for me as a snack when the rest of the family came downstairs.

Applejack...still looked like shit, though that was likely more due to her hangover than her being tired. Outside of Apple Bloom's youthful energy, the atmosphere of the dining room was pretty subdued. I didn't look forward to what would be coming up next.

"Oh, hey Twi," she said, her voice sounding gritty and pained. "Strange ta see you here still. You stayed the night?"

"In a sense," I said, stifling a yawn. "I didn't get any sleep last night."

"Oh. Well, that's unfortunate," she said, rubbing her face vigorously with her hooves. "Guh, gotta get ta work. Big Mac, what's mah schedule today?"

Big Mac and I exchanged a look, before he cleared his throat. "Nothin' left, AJ. Work's done."

It took her a moment to process that, but once she did, her eyes lit up with surprise. "What?! Wait, how-hold on! There's no way the work's done, ah still had a whole side o' the orchard left!"

"Yeah, well, it's done," I chimed in, biting into a crunchier section of my toast and chewing a piece off. "I finished it up for you. Told you I didn't get any sleep last night."

The room became deathly silent, save for Granny Smith walking over with a glass of semi-cool water for Applejack to drink down. She dropped a fizzy tablet in the water, much to Applejack's chagrin. She probably didn't realize she was so thirsty, but the moment she saw that water, I knew she'd want it. I was always the same way after a night of binge drinking (not that I did it hardly ever), and I'd never met anyone in that state that didn't want plenty of fluids in the morning after.

Of course, the fact that Applejack was giving me the dirtiest of death glares made my sympathy for her fade somewhat.

The moment the tablet had completely fizzed away, Applejack began to down the water without a word. The silence itself was deafening, and aside from the occasional sound of ponies eating their breakfast, no one said a word. I was sure that if Applejack could glare at me through her glass, she would've. There were a lot of looks being exchanged around the table however, and even I, the one most inexperienced with families and gatherings, could tell that they knew that a storm was coming in the form of a very irate Apple mare.

Applejack set the glass down with a loud clunk, and despite her only holding it by touching it with her hoof, I could see the glass tremble in her tactile grip. "Y'all wanna repeat that?"

"Your work's finished," I said without hesitation, taking another bite of my toast. "Took a lot of time, but I managed it."

I could hear her take in a deep breath to calm herself down, but it wasn't helping. "And how...did ya manage that, sugarcube?"

"Magic," I said, reaching up to tap the tip of my horn. "I'm a mage after all. I couldn't buck trees like you do to save my life."

To say that Applejack looked livid would be an understatement. Her bloodshot eyes looked even worse than when she'd first come downstairs, and that glass was shaking a whole lot more than it should've been. I actually saw some fractures beginning to form here and there in it, and I couldn't help but wince at what that implied. Just how strong of an earth pony was she?

She turned her gaze on Big Mac, clenching her teeth. "An' you musta helped her!"

"E-eeyup." he said, leaning away from Applejack.

It wasn't like a pony to growl. That was definitely what I was hearing from AJ's clenched muzzle, the glass she was holding making crackly screeching noises as her grip tightened. I watched Apple Bloom duck away as the glass shattered, the sharp shards crashing over her part of the table and making a general mess. I was too tired to really give a damn. You know, that kind of tired where a chariot could fall from the sky right next to you, and outside of being startled, you wouldn't give a shit? That kind of tired.

"Ah'm out!" Apple Bloom suddenly stated, stepping away from the table with her plate in one hoof. "AJ's gettin' all seasonal again."

"Hey!" Granny Smith barked, banging her hoof against the table. "You watch yer mouth there, little filly!"

"Sorry, Granny!"

I watched her head into the living room, out of sight. Granny Smith seemed upset, while Big Mac looked rather intimidated by the way Applejack was reacting to my defiance. I was sure that if I were a changeling, I'd be poisoned by the fury in her eyes now. Her posture was hunched down as if she were ready to pounce on me, and her forehooves were rested on top of the table, one of them grinding one of the glass shards underhoof.

"Applejack Apple, you settle down and clean up that mess!" Granny Smith quickly demanded of her, giving her a stern look. "We'll talk about this real civilized-like when yer done."

"Ah'll get that when ah'm done with her," she snarled, glaring daggers at me. "I made myself real clear last time we talked about this, an' you went behind mah back! Even muh own brother helped ya do it!"

There was something...familiar, about what she was saying. At the time, I simply couldn't point out what it was for myself. Now, I can fully acknowledge the hypocrisy of my actions, after so thoroughly condemning Celestia for what she'd done to me. Perhaps history would repeat itself completely, and I'd get an apology later for her abysmal behavior right at that moment.

"I just...dang it!" she muttered, snorting and jolting up from her seat without a word.

She left the room and came back with a dustpan and a broom, making a point of cleaning up her mess while eyeing both myself and Big Macintosh. I really wasn't sure how to defuse the situation, but chances were, there wasn't really any way outside of riding out the storm that was Hurricane Applejack. Perhaps she had actually seen reason in the matter?

She marched up to me after getting rid of the glass, coming snout-to-snout with me. "Git off mah farm."

Or not.

"You know, if you'd let me explain-"

"You got five seconds to get outta my sight a'fore I start swingin'," she said, raising a foreleg and raising it up threateningly. "An' when that starts, whatever happens happens."

I knew when to take a hint. I set my toast down and got up from my seat, quickly walking away from her and into the living room, past Apple Bloom. Even I wasn't stupid enough to stay within swinging distance of an earth pony of her physical prowess when they were pissed off at me. That was kind of one of those golden rules you followed if you didn't want to have a really bad day, if you woke up at all after they laid you out. I could hear her following behind me, and I was fairly sure that Granny Smith was following the both of us as well, along with Big Macintosh.

Once we were outside, I dared to speak up. "You know, I did this because you were working yourself to the bone. If this is the kind of thanks I'm going to get for doing you a solid, next time I'll just let you keep making the same mistakes."

"Ah don't need no backstabbin', sneaky ponies doin' my job for me!" she shouted at me, stepping closer to me from behind. "Yer lucky I don't kick yer flank outta Ponyville for that!"

"Oh, you can sure as shit try," I shouted back, turning to face her, only halfway to the front gate. "And when you wind up in the red because you keep making those same mistakes, I'll buy the farm out from under you!"

I had my magic at the ready the moment she charged, but Big Macintosh was already there, grappling with his sister and holding her back. She snarled and called me every cursed name under Celestia's sun that she could think of, flailing at me and snorting like one of our feral ancestors, ready to throw down. I shied away as she screamed bloody murder at me, but Granny Smith's presence in front of her seemed to make her calm down considerably.

"Sugarcube, settle yerself down an' go cool off," she ordered, frowning. "Right now, before ya do somethin' you'll regret."

"But she-! I-!" Applejack tried to say, pointing a hoof at me. "She just-!"

"Did I stutter?!" Granny shouted at her, stamping a hoof. "Git outta here!"

Big Mac let her go, and with a final dirty look thrown my way, she walked off, grumbling to herself. I was already regretting my words, and with my anger fizzling out, I could only wish that I could take them back. Granny Smith looked fairly bothered by it as well, judging by how she was giving me a once-over as she approached me.

"Think it's about time you got outta here too," she said, resting a hoof on my wither. "Ya didn't mean whatcha said, right?"

"No. No I didn't, I just...sorry," I said, rubbing the side of my head while a sensation of shame washed over me. "I didn't mean to say that."

She smiled at me and nodded. "That's alright, sugarcube. You get on back to where yer stayin' an' get some rest. You look like ya need it."

"What about Applejack?" I asked, glancing in the direction she walked off in. "She's probably really pissed off at me."

"Eh, she'll be alright," Granny said, stepping back and waving a hoof in the air. "She's tired n' hung over. Once she calms down, she'll start thinkin' about it. She's right stubborn, but she ain't stupid."

"I hope you're right about that."

"She's got a whole lot o' free time now, thanks to you," she said, turning to head back to the farmhouse. "She'll piece it all together and get her head on straight. Be safe out there, sugarcube!"

"Thank you!"

I left the farm with no fuss after that, aside from giving Big Mac an apologetic look. Poor stallion would be the one to take the brunt of Applejack's ire, without me being around for her to pummel. Ah well, he was one of the co-conspirators, he deserved to take a little of the heat at the very least. Seemed that history was indeed repeating itself here, but this time, I wasn't the one in the wrong.

Instead of heading straight back to Fluttershy's cottage, obviously, I had somewhere else to be. I went past her place and headed to the west along the Everfree, just as the Shaman told me to do. Sleep beckoned and some small part of me desperately wanted me to just go to the cottage and pass out on the couch, but I couldn't let this opportunity pass me by. There was no way I was going to defy the Shaman's instructions.

I walked far off the beaten path and began to pace back and forth along the forest's edge, making sure to keep myself aware of my surroundings despite my exhaustion. With the state I was in, I was light-headed and only partially awake, and the lack of sleep combined with the almost complete drain of my mana reserves was starting to cause a headache, and the slight drunkenness I'd worked through the previous night probably didn't help matters.

Eventually, when I was thoroughly off the beaten path, I sat down and let myself rest. My hindleg was beginning to throb from walking all night and getting no sleep, and it was screaming for me to flop over and catch some shut-eye, but I knew I couldn't. Knowing my luck, I'd fall asleep and timberwolves would show up.

Still, sitting there and doing nothing was making the exhaustion catch up with me real fast, so I tried to busy myself with meditation...until that began to put me to sleep as well. Fortunately I got a wake-up call in the form of a sharp, stinging pain in the side of my neck. The pain was so startling that I jolted up and turned to quickly look around, trying to find the source of it. Seeing nothing, I reached up to the spot on my neck and winced again as my hoof bumped into something sticking out from the spot.

I quickly removed it and held it in front of myself as a warm sensation began to radiate through my body, from my head down through my legs and the rest of my body, my tail swishing rapidly in irritation as a faint itching sensation welled up here and there on me. The wooden dart I was holding had some expertly-plucked feathers attached to it, and the needle was small, like a tranquilizer dart but clearly hoof-made. Someone had whittled it down instead of getting it manufactured. This was definitely a blow dart. That meant....

I heard some rustling in some bushes just on the edge of the forest, and the Shaman stepped out of her hiding spot, her blowpipe being tucked into a saddlebag she had slung over her back. In the same motion, she pulled out a thin wooden stick with thinner pins attached to the end of it in a row of three. She approached me calmly while I threw the dart on the ground.

"You gotta be fucking kidding me!"

Author's Note

So, this chapter took much longer than I expected, but I have no one to blame but myself. I really need to stop finding fun, cheap games to buy on Steam. I can be easily distracted for days on end. Still, here it is, and hurray for that, eh?

If you're wondering what Lyra was singing in the bar....

This actually punctuates one of the bigger, but less significant changes I've made to my plans for the story's overall outline. See, originally Lyra was going to be singing in a bar that Twilight went to near the end of the Stalliongrad arc, and she was going to be singing this song due to the history it has with Stalliongrad.

I cut that scene out because there was already enough going on in the Stalliongrad arc with Gadget, and Lyra isn't some main character. I really didn't need to add more to it. It wouldn't have had any significant impact. On top of that, I was going to go with the familiar stereotype of Lyra being just a bit bubbly and oblivious of her situation, and have Twilight wind up having to escort her back to her hotel since she didn't seem to realize how dangerous Stalliongrad could actually be. That didn't really fit with the other aspects of Lyra's character. She likes to travel, and hear new songs, and meet other low-key musicians and come up with songs with them. The idea that she could somehow be utterly oblivious towards her surroundings and the potential danger they represent is preposterous, when you consider the fact that she's been all over Equestria as well as out of country on several occasions.

Still, I loved the song and I still wanted to give her some character, so...I inserted her in here, in the background. What do you all think? Was it a good choice?

There's also the fact that this song is very fitting for Applejack. She's got some trauma to work through, and she's put a lot of walls up around herself. It's where her stubbornness and her toughness comes from. Those walls need to be torn down. Maybe not now, but someday.

As a note, the number of likes has hit 666....

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Chapter 32 - Interrogation

Chapter 32 - Interrogation

written by Fire Soul

The tingling warmth that spread through my body wasn't particularly unpleasant, at first. It was making me itch in strange places, but it was tolerable, as long as I took a moment to scratch myself. Hooves didn't make for good scratchers however, and no matter how much I did it, the itch came back. I was going to start getting sore skin at this rate.

I turned to face the Shaman as she approached, her calm gait oddly intimidating as she held that strange wooden tool up in front of herself. It definitely wasn't a weapon, it was no spiked baseball bat, but the row of three needle-like wood spikes certainly promised pain if she whacked you with it. It probably would've mattered more to me if I wasn't constantly being interrupted by an itch in a strange place. It especially seemed to focus around my cutie marks.

"" she said, stopping in front of me and looking down at me. ""

I winced and vigorously scratched at an itch on my flank. ""

""

"What?!" I barked in shock, struggling not to go after an itch that just happened to pop up on the side of my neck. ""

"" she explained calmly, her eyes never moving away from me. ""

That didn't exactly put my mind at ease. If anything it only made me more afraid of my current situation. Not to mention I didn't exactly agree with the idea that she couldn't be held accountable for me clawing my neck into raw meat if I refused to give her honest answers. Non-lethal my nerdy flank!

"" she said, holding the needled stick toward me. ""

"" I said slowly, cringing as the itching sensation on my neck got worse, prompting me to scratch it before I could think of stopping myself. ""

"" she said, walking around to my side. ""

"" I answered quickly, bracing just in case I started to itch for no reason.

She waited for a time, watching me to see my body's reaction before nodding in approval. ""

""

Once again, a pause before she continued. ""

I blinked at the question, then shook my head. ""

"" she said, moving to stand in front of me. ""

""

I froze as the tingling warmth in my body began to come to the surface. My eyes widened in dread as that warmth began to make my already sensitive skin itch, more and more, over every inch of my body. Just the light shifting of the air around me was enough to make me yelp in alarm as my entire body began to scream for me to scratch everywhere. I couldn't keep my composure, and I began to reach everywhere to scratch myself.

It's difficult to fully explain how bad it actually was. When you scratch an itch, it usually goes away after a few seconds. With this, it was like I was scratching the itch, but just the touch of my hoof was setting my nerves off all over again. It was a looping cycle of torment that even my clothes were only making worse. If I'd been naked, it would've been just a little bit more bearable, but not by any significant amount, I guessed.

"" she said, seemingly unsurprised by the sudden itching attack I was going through. ""

I hissed in a breath and forced my forehooves down to the ground. ""

The effect was immediate, and beyond satisfying. The full-body itching sensation quickly faded away, as if it had never happened to begin with. Only the residual tingling left any sign that it actually happened. I sighed happily and quickly scratched at a few remaining itchy feelings on one of my forelegs, panting lightly from the sudden rush the experience had given me. The entire time, the Shaman was patiently waiting for me to recover.

"" she said, sitting down in front of me. ""

"" I said, swallowing nervously. ""

""

"" I said, clearing my throat. ""

"" she said simply, lightly shrugging. ""

"" I responded, grunting and scratching my cheek. ""

"" she said, bowing her head ever so briefly. ""

"" I stated calmly, trying to sit up straighter despite my exhaustion. ""

""

I took a deep breath and prepared myself for what might come next. ""

"" she muttered, shaking her head. ""

"" I answered slowly, swallowing the lump in my throat.

"" she asked, firmly tapping one of her hindhooves against the grass.

I clenched my teeth and shook my head. ""

It started out slow at first, and this time I was ready. I could feel the itching sensation build throughout every part of my body, like bugs crawling under my skin. I shivered and shook my head quickly a few times, just trying to ride it out. Soon it was all over my face, under my mane, behind and inside my ears...I couldn't stand it. I almost lit my horn in an attempt to scratch every part of my body all at once, but I had to keep this on her terms. At the same time, I really didn't want to tell her my plans.

""

"" I struggled to say, scraping at the back of one of my ears with a hoof. ""

"" she said, stepping closer and holding up that barbed stick of hers threateningly. ""

I seethed and hissed out a breath from between my clenched teeth, my eyes clenching shut even as the pain in my muzzle flared up, only to be replaced by a fiery itching sensation. My legs felt weak and it was hard to form thoughts as the desire to just scratch and never stop scratching enveloped my senses entirely. I just wanted to collapse and scrape at my body all over until it stopped.

I closed my eyes and shook my head, taking in deep breaths and letting them out in slow, rhythmic patterns. I needed to center myself and put everything else out. The feeling on my skin like bugs marching their way through my fur, the burning reflexive desire to satisfy the itching sensation, all of it had to be separated from my consciousness. It would take some doing, but even with how I felt at the time, it was possible.

""

The sudden slap of something sharp against my side caused me to cry out in alarm and panic as the itching sensation suddenly flared to life with all the intensity of a screaming, gaping wound. Instantly, I fell onto my side and convulsed at the burning, itching sensation that engulfed my side, then my entire body as the catalyst spread through me. There wasn't a single inch of my body that wasn't calling for my undivided attention, and it only took a few seconds for my resolve to break as I rolled and panted breathlessly on the ground, reaching for various parts of my body to scrape and scratch at with my hooves.

It didn't help. Nothing helped. I couldn't think straight, and the thought of tearing my own skin open never even entered my mind as I reached for my neck and face and began to rub and scrape it it incessantly. Harder and harder I ground my hooves into myself, trying in vain to satisfy the itch that refused to disappear. Even blinking made the itching on my eyelids worse, and I clenched them shut in a desperate attempt to at least lessen their intensity.

It's worth noting that I've never been put into a situation where I've suffered anything worse than a waterboarding. I've never had my limbs broken to force me into compliance, I've never had anyone hold a hacksaw to my horn and threaten to remove it if I didn't tell them what they wanted to know. I've never suffered for days on end from torture after excruciating torture, unlike the torture I've put numerous Mafia thugs through in my basement.

It was only when I felt someone grabbing me and firmly pinning my legs down that my focus was ever-so-briefly turned away from my own body. That didn't stop me from screaming and trying to scratch at myself with my horn instead, something the Shaman quickly put to a stop as she bent one foreleg and pinned mine with her body. She firmly grabbed hold of my horn and wrenched it in an odd direction, giving it occasional twists and tugs whenever I tried to pour magic through it.

"" she demanded, giving a pull on my horn to force my head to bend back further. ""

"Grraahhh!!" I screamed while trying to fight against her grip, on the verge of hyperventilation as the itching continued to intensify everywhere. "I want to kill them all!!!"

The moment I let the floodgates open, they refused to close, and I think the Shaman knew that. It could've also been her knowledge of the nature of the serum she used on me, because the moment I said it, the itching lessened. Spurred on by the blissful sensation, I quickly sat up as she hopped off of me, standing aside and listening intently while I began to spill the beans. I just didn't care at that point. All that mattered was making the itch go away.

"They ruined my life and I want them to suffer like I suffered! No no, I want them to have it worse!" I spouted, grinning with manic glee as the itching continued to fade. "I want to gut the entirety of the Mafia and watch them bleed and beg for me to stop! I want to have every last one of those stupid pricks broken and bleeding to death on the streets until the dirt and the stones are stained red! I want to rip their balls off and feed them to their families!!"

If she was in any way offended by what I was saying, she didn't show it. She seemed rather calm, considering. She certainly made no move to stop me. She just stood there and let me keep going.

"Do you-do you have any idea what they did to me when I was six?!" I asked, giggling far faster and far more giddily than I could ever remember myself doing. "They made me kill a mare! Then they kept making me do it to other ponies until I got really good at it!"

She simply shifted her stance, and motioned for me to continue. I shouldn't have wanted to, but there's something relieving about revealing your secrets to someone. You aren't the only one that has to hold on to those secrets anymore, and in my case, the secrets were heavy indeed.

"Heh-hnngh!" I began to laugh, before my senses began to slowly come back to me. "That's...oh sweet Celestia...that's why I want the Fool's Errand. I saw an opportunity, and I couldn't pass it up. I have plans. I have so many plans, but the Fool's Errand would be an excellent safety net! That, and your knowledge of potions and concoctions that even the Magus are unaware of could be extremely useful in emergencies."

"" she said, nodding and reaching into her saddlebag, producing a vial with a strange, glowing blue liquid. ""

"" I answered quickly, panting in satisfaction as the itch finally died down enough that I could control myself. ""

She seemed to ponder on my answer for a time, while I quickly began to reach the very end of my patience. That vial signified the end of this torture, and I cannot accurately express just how much I wanted it in that singular instant. The morning light glinted off of the glass, and the dim glow of the blue fluid called to me like an orgasm demands the full and unbroken attention of a stallion when it's time for that special moment to happen.

I think she saw me reaching for it with my hoof, because she came right over and gave it to me without any further hesitation. I looked between the potion and her a few times, before she nodded and motioned for me to drink it. I quickly uncorked the top of the vial and held it up to my lips, quickly tipping my head back and draining it into my mouth. The taste was...something else.

As soon as I had it down, I blinked in surprise. ""

"" she said, turning without a word and beckoning for me to follow. ""

I stood slowly, the sudden breeze setting my skin off, but not like it had previously. There was still an errant scratch here and there, but they could be driven off with a quick rub or grind of a forehoof. Nothing like the absolute agony that was the last ten minutes. She was already at the treeline by the time the antidote really began to take effect, and I trotted to catch up with her. I wasn't exactly feeling up to a full run.

"" I asked, frowning at the thought.

"" she said, glancing back at me with a faint smile. ""

"Oh. "

She quickly shook her head. ""

"" I muttered slowly, glancing off to the side. ""

""

"" I said, trying to catch up with her as we disappeared into the Everfree together. ""

"" she said, glancing back at me with a faint smirk. ""

I cracked a smile and shook my head. ""

""

I stumbled for just a moment as a thick branch got caught under my hooves. ""

She didn't even bother to look back at me, marching through the underbrush like she owned the forest itself. ""

Needless to say, we fell into a sort of companionable silence after that. I was still rather miffed about the way she'd treated me. I could still feel the itching, and who just up and does that to a pony?! I mean it's fucked up, alright? I know, pot calling the kettle black over here.

The bushes and tree branches we passed by weren't helping my case either. Due to the thickness of the forest, I wasn't feeling much in the way of wind, but that didn't stop me from getting smacked in the head with leaves here and there, forcing me to keep my head low and out of the way for fear of a particularly thick branch catching me unaware and damaging my muzzle more than it already was. On top of that, I was still sore and exhausted from work, and you know that feeling you get all over when you've pulled an all-nighter? The one where you feel cold but sweaty and humid in your own clothes? Yeah, I had that going on, and the moisture in the early morning air wasn't helping matters. I hadn't even had a chance to take a shower!

I would've showered at the farm if I'd known this was going to happen. I figured that maybe we'd talk things out, she'd size me up, and then maybe she'd hopefully decide to talk more at a later date at her home or something. I did not expect to get darted and quizzed on threat of death by throat-rending and torturous itching, only to then be led through the Everfree by the same pony that tortured me.

It'd be worth it though. I could put all that aside if it meant even a chance of her helping me out. It didn't sit well with me that she had a vague understanding of my plans now, but I'd have to play it by ear on that front. If this whole thing really went south on me, I'd just have to make sure she didn't blab. Whether that meant breaking her mind and altering her memories or outright killing her, I couldn't be sure at the time.

The trek to her home wasn't actually as long as I'd initially expected. Shamans were the reclusive sort, so I expected this to take like...I dunno, hours or something. In actuality, it only took half an hour of constant walking to get there, during which she pointedly avoided being much of a conversational companion. Unfortunate for me, since talking with her would've at least helped me stay awake. I was getting really drowsy after that trying incident, and a bed sounded like the best thing in the world at the time.

Her house, however, managed to pique my interest, if only because it wasn't the most well-hidden thing in the forest. The clearing that the hut was located in wasn't particularly big, but given the fact that someone lived in it, it had to be all kinds of conspicuous to the creatures that lived in the forest. On top of that, it looked like a giant tree stump that was cut down, hollowed out, and turned into a makeshift home. You know, like a luxury apartment for a hobo or wildpony. Most huts I knew of were in Zebrica, and those were built from carved and processed wood or thatch.

The walls inside of the hut were just about as non-descript as the outside. No fancy paint of any sort, and unlike the average home that has multiple layers making up a single wall, she hadn't really insulated it against more grievous temperature changes. I figured perhaps she just hadn't gotten around to it yet, and her accent did hint at her being native to Zebrica, so maybe she just wasn't used to the concept of snow and freezing cold temperatures? At least, not the way the vast majority of us Equestrians were.

That doesn't even factor in the absurdity that is the Everfree Forest's self-contained and consistently changing climate. Ah well, that was less important than the decorations she'd adorned the walls with. If there was any doubt about whether she was a zebrican native or not, it was banished from my mind the moment I saw the masks she had hanging on the walls directly next to the entrance. If I was remembering my zebrican history correctly, the two signs stacked one above the other, from top to bottom, indicated this was a place of health and happiness. It was a common custom among the many tribes to carve masks and display them in their houses, depending on the seasons and the goings-on in the lives of the members of the household. Unfortunately, certain factions made masks of different designs from other tribes, so I couldn't be a hundred percent sure that was what those two masks stood for. Similarities tended to carry over, but the changes could mean the difference between health and happiness, and strife and irritation. I was leaning more towards the former because both masks were smiling.

That wasn't the only thing in the room that caught my attention however. There were herbs and noise-making gourds hanging from the ceiling, some likely for decoration and warding away evil spirits, and others were probably alchemical ingredients currently undergoing a drying process. On top of that, there were several shelves lined with ingredients both rare and common, I even saw the venom gland from a manticore's tail sitting in a corner! Several tables took up space along the outer edges of the main room, and each one had scorch marks and stains all over it, each one of different colors. The only table that escaped this description was a table on the far side of the room, right under one of the two windows. It had two chairs set up on either side of it, and it had clearly been carved out of the inside of the tree itself, very similar to the way certain aspects of the Golden Oaks Library had been carved out.

The only other room I saw was past a bead curtain that separated the main room from what I was guessing was either a kitchen or her bedroom. Perhaps even a bathroom. Zebras were known for being particularly hardy, and it wasn't like sleeping on a hard floor was too uncomfortable. Surely if that were the case, she likely had some cushions tucked away somewhere, but that hut was way too well-built for her to overlook the comfort of an actual bed.

I heard the door close behind me, and I looked back to see her shutting it and flipping a thick metal lock into place on it. I suppose when it comes to home security living out in the middle of one of the most volatile natural places in Equestria, short of the Living Meadows, you'd rather rely on something like solid steel over more natural solutions. Couldn't blame her for that, even if it messed with the whole 'natural-built home inside of a hollowed-out tree trunk' aesthetic. Then again, there was that giant iron cauldron she had set up right in the middle of the room, so maybe it wasn't that out of place.

"You have shown respect, and requested my counsel, so I shall speak plainly in your language," she said, walking past me and her cauldron, taking a seat at the table by the window and slipping her saddlebags off of her back. "Join me, and we shall talk as equals."

I walked over and took a seat without question, glancing out of the window briefly before looking back at her. "Isn't that unorthodox? I thought Shamans always spoke in rhyme when not speaking Zebrikaans."

"It is a matter of respect, Twilight Sparkle," she said, visibly relaxing while cracking a faint smile. "You have shown respect to me despite my rude transgressions, and you made a formal request. There are no traditions behind it, but it is only proper to show the same respect in turn."

"Then...why speak in rhyme all the time?" I asked, shifting to my left and right to get just a little more comfortable in my seat. "That's something Shamans are known for."

She actually chuckled and shook her head. "Speaking in rhyme is not necessary, but we Shamans do it in order to keep our minds sharp. It also encourages us to always think about what we are going to say before we say it. Besides, if we always spoke in rhyme to everyone we met, how would we ever keep our presence hidden? We only do it with those we trust, or feel we can trust."

"Wait, then..." I began to say, something not adding up. "Where did that belief come from? That Shamans always talk in rhyme?"

She smiled smugly and tilted her head to her left. "Misdirection is always useful, even if it is not intended. What they do not know only benefits us."

"Makes sense...alright," I said, glancing around the room curiously. "So, I'm guessing you wanted to talk about something?"

"A few things. You could compare this to a business deal of sorts. But first, I believe a better introduction between us is in order," she said, holding a gold-adorned foreleg out to me over the table. "You may call me Zecora."

I quickly extended my own and touched hooves with her. "Well, aside from the dart to the neck and the pseudo-torture, well-met. I apologize if I don't sound particularly enthusiastic right now, I'm very tired."

She gave me a curt nod and lowered her leg. "Then I apologize for having to keep you up longer, but I feel that what you are doing is of particular importance. Please, explain your plan. I trust you understand that what is spoken of in this home is never repeated outside of it unless you wish it to be?"

"Of course! Of course...uh," I began, reaching up to rub the back of my neck sheepishly. "Unfortunately, the plan isn't particularly specific at the moment. If I'd started when I was younger I would've been able to really get to work immediately, but...."

"When you were younger?" she asked, her eyes glancing up and down my body. "But you are already so young. How much younger could you have possibly been?"

I sighed slowly and glanced off to the side. "They got me when I was six. Heh, I didn't choose the Mafia life, the Mafia life chose me!"

She stared at me for a time, her eyes drilling into my own before she stood up from her seat. "I will prepare something to give you more energy. Perhaps it would be best if you started from the beginning."

So I did. While she prepared some kind of concoction in her cauldron, I began to recount the events leading up to my present day activities. I knew with a high level of certainty that I could trust her to never speak a word of my actions to anyone, and the entire time, she listened without a hint of judgment. I saw pity in her eyes, but she didn't judge me for my behavior. I confessed to my experiments on live subjects, the murder of numerous Mafia goons...it was very relieving, to just tell all of that to someone.

By the time she finished the potion and began to fill several empty jars with the excess of the concoction, I was done talking. I had to explain how little of a plan I actually had at the moment. Right now it was a matter of securing funds and influence wherever I could. That was going to take a lot of time and I knew it. More than I would've preferred, but as I've said before, I can be very patient.

When she finished with her task, she sat down across from me, with a single smaller glass in her hoof. She set it down in front of me and motioned for me to drink it. I looked down at the dirty yellow liquid I was being offered before shrugging and bracing myself, pressing the glass to my lips and knocking back as much of it as I could stomach without taking a breath. The drink was a little thick and tasted of honey and lemons, though I didn't recall seeing her mixing any lemons into the cauldron. Then again, I was also really tired at the time, so it's possible I missed some things while I was rambling on about my life.

The moment it began to settle in my stomach, I could feel a warm sensation spreading through my body. Nothing like the intense itching from before, this was more like a feeling of an internal massage going off while my veins flooded with adrenaline. I felt more awake, more alert and more energetic than I could ever remember, even before the farm work I did, and after I put the glass down, I had to shake my head to try and deal with the buzzing ringing in my ears.

She gave me time to acclimate to the potion's effects before speaking. "You walk a dark and dangerous path, Twilight Sparkle. It is not one I can agree with."

"I know," I said, running a hoof over the top of my head. "But please try to understand my situation."

"Explain it to me then, so I may hopefully comprehend," she said, resting a hoof against the top of the table and leaning some of her weight on it. "You have a son, a family that cares for you, the attention of both Princesses, and you are fairly wealthy. Why would you make such a self-destructive choice?"

"Because I hate them!" I said, struggling to restrain the guttural growl that threatened to rise up with it. "It's not...look, I know it's not a smart choice. But I look back on my life and how completely fucked up it all is, and all I see is what they turned me into! I hate them with every fiber of my being, and the idea of them not having to suffer for what they did to me makes me feel hollow inside!"

"Hollow?"

"Empty! Dead, useless, whatever you want to call it!" I said, pressing a hoof to my chest and inhaling deeply, then letting it out slowly while extending my foreleg to calm myself down. "Sorry. Just...very touchy subject."

"It is fine. Please, continue."

I sighed and nodded to her. "I used to have so many nightmares. I kept seeing ponies dying when I slept, ponies I killed, and it ate away at me, made sure I got very little sleep. I thought I was doing okay when I finally stopped having the nightmares, but then I realized that I just stopped feeling bad about what I was doing. That was when I knew they'd ruined me. They're...they're infections that poison everything they touch, including ponies! If I don't make them pay for what they did to me, then how can I live with myself?"

"Then what of your son?" she asked, motioning in the general direction of Ponyville. "Your friends, your family? I feel I must discourage you from this task you have set before yourself, and I must remind you that your actions could put them all at risk."

"That's something I've thought about a lot, but the conclusion is still the same. I need to do this," I responded, tapping the edge of my hoof against the top of the table. "My son is going to get a lot of attention when he's older. He's smart, he's well-read, and even at his age, he's capable. I have connections to the Mafia. I can't leave them be when I know damn well they'll come after him once they can find a use for him."

"And what of your friends? Do they not concern you as well?" she asked, maintaining her stoic demeanor.

"Well aside from the whole eternal night thing happening if I didn't meet them, they would've been better off having never met me in the first place," I said, gently rubbing over the braced bridge of my muzzle. "Now they're fairly famous and I can't be around to keep them safe forever."

"You say that as if you are a one-mare army," she said, getting up from her seat and stepping away from the table. "You cannot be everywhere at once."

"Perhaps not, but my words and my influence can," I said, turning to face her better, leaning one side against the side of the table. "I know how they work. They can't make any overt moves without me noticing. Not to mention, they don't realize they've got a snake in the hen house...huh. I think I talked with Big Macintosh too much last night. I'm using farming phrases."

"It could also be that you are still tired," she said, approaching one of her workbenches and pulling some ingredients out from different crates beneath it. "That made no sense at all."

"What I mean is, while I'm not working with them anymore, they don't realize I'm starting to make moves against them," I said, unable to hold back a sly grin. "I'll pick 'em apart while they sleep and leave nothing come morning."

"Hm. While I do not agree with your choice, I do understand it," she said, reaching for a mortar and pestle she had sitting on a shelf above the workbench. "It reminds me of the tale of King Zulu. I worry that history may repeat itself with you."

"King Zulu...I recall the name, but not the story."

"The tale is long, but I will simplify it," she said, never taking her eyes away from her work as she put several ingredients into the bowl and began to mash them up. "Zulu was a king unlike any us zebras had ever seen, but when the minotaurs began to impede upon his domain, he was outclassed, in intellect as well as military might."

"Okay, that reminds me of a few things..." I said, tapping my chin. "If I recall, he went and declared war with them regardless."

"Correct! A most foolish decision, and his people did not fully back him, though he intimidated many of them into obedience. It would not work forever," she said, shaking her head slowly. "He had visions of the future for his people. He refused to let the minotaurs impede his goals, even if that meant forcibly keeping them far, far away. He was very xenophobic."

"Yeah, he was. Kinda failing to see how my activities remind you of him though."

"Let me finish," she said, holding up a hoof. "His war with them did not end well, and did not last for very long in comparison to many other wars. However, while the war was waged, he became progressively more and more unstable after several failed assassination attempts. He began to jump at shadows and make absurd laws and declarations for his people. When his armies were routed, none would follow him again. When the minotaurs gave him a final chance at peace, he attempted to strike down their envoy in sheer rage, and was struck down instead by an archer in the distance. A zebra archer."

"Alright. Still not seeing it though."

She sighed and grabbed a larger bowl, pouring the contents from her mortar into it. "He was a very proud and very angry king, Twilight Sparkle. He was arrogant enough to believe that no matter what, he must succeed in his endeavors. It led him down a dangerous and destructive path that only ended in his own demise, and the demise of many of his own people. People that believed he was right. In the end, one of his own people put him down because he had lost himself to his hatred, and was actively damaging his own people's reputation."

She turned away from the bench and walked closer to her cauldron, raising up onto her hindlegs to grab some of what looked like holly off of a string suspending it from the ceiling. I couldn't even fathom what she was going to do with that, I wasn't the greatest alchemist and Shaman alchemy was even more of an alien concept to me. For the life of me, I couldn't even begin to come up with an idea of what she was mixing up in that bowl.

"You hate them with all your heart, so much that you would put the well-being of your son, your family and even your friends at risk," she said, giving me a stern glare. "But you feel driven to do so. You have a black fire burning deep in your soul that cannot be snuffed out with anything less than the blood of your chosen enemy."

"That's a poetic way of putting it, and it's not like I want them to be at risk, but...." I said, shuffling self-consciously in my seat.

"Of course not. You do not strike me as the heartless type," she said, using a strangely-shaped scoop to crunch and mash the dried plant into the rest of the mush she'd poured into the bowl. "A heartless pony who has lost her empathy, as those with your experiences in life often do, would not choose to help her friend by working through the night and working herself to exhaustion. I would even say that your self-awareness is what stopped you from falling so far. However...."

She picked the bowl up and calmly walked over to her cauldron, carefully scooping the mushy contents into it. I could hear the water begin to sizzle, and strange oily bubbles rose up from the surface, floating into the air and popping noisily. Out of curiosity, I got up from my seat and walked over to it, looking to her for permission to come closer. She seemed to know what I was asking, and motioned me over to watch while she picked up a thick oaken stick that had been leaning against the inside of the cauldron, slowly stirring it in a lazy circle.

She reached over after a few moments and pressed a hoof to my chest. "I understand why you feel you must do this, and I will not tell you to not stand so close to that fire. Just be careful that you do not fall into it. Do you understand what I am telling you? Do not be another King Zulu."

"I think I get it...maybe," I said, looking down at the bubbling concoction. "You don't want me to go crazy and get so obsessed with taking them down that I start losing my equinity in exchange for every step I take closer to my goal."

She smiled more genuinely at me, the corners of her eyelids crinkling up along with the corners of her muzzle. "Yes, that is what matters most. As Celestia would say, trust in Harmony. You more than most others, considering you bear one of the Elements of Harmony!"

"Hah! I still can't believe one of those Elements chose me. The thought of it boggles the mind."

"At first glance, perhaps," she said, her smile fading slowly. "Do you believe that after you succeed, if you succeed, you will be able to live in peace once again?"

"...I don't know," I said slowly, shrugging. "I hope I can. That's a long ways off though."

"What will you do if you can't?" she asked, resuming stirring her mixture. "What if the fire never fades, and the urge to kill rises up within you again, and you no longer have an acceptable outlet for it? To be blunt, you are a serial killer. Maybe because you are psychopathic, maybe because you simply hate the Mafia so very much. No matter how well you may think of yourself, you are a very real danger to the ponies around you."

"As long as I had the freedom to choose, I have always done everything I possibly can to avoid killing anyone that didn't deserve it," I said quickly, scowling at nothing as several memories flooded my mind. "I've never felt good about killing those that had nothing to do with it. They didn't deserve it, but sometimes I'd get orders, and if I didn't follow through...."

"Yes, of course," she said, staring into the bubbling cauldron. "That at least shows some promise. Maybe the pony you once were before they dug their claws into you can be brought to the surface once more. Only time will tell."

I nodded once, and silence fell upon us for a time. She seemed very focused on her cauldron, and I guessed that whatever she was making required close attention. It wasn't like a pot of soup, you couldn't just walk away and leave the stuff to simmer until it was ready. Potion-making was often very involved, there were actually very few potions you could just pour things into a pot and simmer in order to make them. Most of them are bordering on useless. Without much else to do, I went to sit down again, taking the time to get comfortable.

The potion I drank had a strange effect on me. Almost like caffeine, but it didn't make my heart race. I felt more energetic and more eager to move around and do something, but the underlying exhaustion that comes from a lack of sleep was still there, no matter how aware I really felt. As I watched her work, I could feel my eyes drooping, but it took very little effort for me to shake it off and sit up straight. Guess I couldn't afford to get cozy.

"Uh, so," I said, clearing my throat. "Are you willing to help me?"

"I cannot say for sure. What you plan to do goes against the very pacifism I try to live my life by. However," she said, never taking her eyes away from the cauldron, looking between the top of it and the fire underneath. "Let us go with a hypothetical, that I do help you. You must understand that all I can do is try. There is no guarantee when it comes to the Fool's Errand."

"I've heard it's extremely hard to make. I'm guessing there's some truth to that?"

"The conditions must be exact and remain absolutely the same the entire time it is being made. If the temperature changes even a single full degree, the Fool's Errand is little more than slop in a container," she said, glancing over at me for only a moment. "Among many other potential factors. Many of the ingredients are also particularly rare and expensive to get your hooves on."

"I'm sure I could afford them," I said, then blinked. "But you'd never tell me what those ingredients are to begin with, would you?"

She smirked at me and looked down at the cauldron again, then just as quickly stopped stirring and bent down to snuff out the flame under the cauldron. "You would be correct! I would accept payment for my services, however. Enough to cover the cost of those ingredients. I have my own way of getting them, but as I said, this is all hypothetical."

"Right, of course."

"Perhaps next time you come to Ponyville, I will have made my decision on the matter, but for now, I must consider my options," she said, motioning to the door. "Can you make it back to Ponyville on your own?"

"Er...I'm not so sure," I said, rubbing my forehead. "I'm exhausted and I don't have a whole lot of my magic left in me."

"Then give me just a little while longer, and I will escort you out of the forest."

I nodded and waited patiently for her to finish up, though after a while I inquired as to the nature of the potion she was making. She hadn't emptied the cauldron, and whatever she mixed in, that was still the potion I'd drank earlier. Apparently whatever I'd chugged down, it wasn't so good for plants, and she wanted to alter it so she could nourish a nearby group of mushrooms in hopes of being able to cultivate some truffles from them down the line.

Once she was done, she walked me through the underbrush of the Everfree until we were out of the forest once again, this time near a road that passed by the edge of it. With a quick farewell, we both went out separate ways, and I worked to find out exactly where I was. By the time I arrived at Fluttershy's cottage, it was eight in the morning just about, I didn't pay too much attention to the clock when I walked in. Fluttershy was already up, but Spike was asleep on the couch.

We greeted each other, but she could tell I wasn't really up for conversation at the time. Instead, she let me head upstairs, wash up, and pass out in her bed. I can easily say, without a shred of doubt, that flopping down in that bed after a shower was the best thing ever to me at the time. While it was faint, Fluttershy's scent was in the pillow along with the brand of shampoo she preferred, and the covers smelled like her as well. I found being surrounded by her scent very relaxing.

Am I weird for being so focused on her scent? Eh, maybe I am. She really does smell quite wonderful. In any case, it wasn't long before I was asleep and gone for the majority of the day after that. A rest well-earned, if you ask me.

Author's Note

Well, this chapter was fun! Sorry about the arrow brackets with talking in Zebrikaans and such, but those are whole sentences and I definitely don't know anyone that can give me whole sentences in that language, let alone sit down and put out that much dialogue for me. Better than me trying to do Google Translate, right? Plus, I think the beginning of this chapter would be frustrating and nigh-unreadable if I went and did that.

As for King Zulu, that's a reference to Shaka Zulu, but don't expect any accuracy. I did not research Shaka Zulu, and don't know any specifics about him, so you can take this more as vague inspiration than anything else. If you want to know about Shaka Zulu, look him up.

Next chapter's an Interlude chapter.
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Interlude 2 - A Day Among the Mortals

Interlude 2 - A Day Among the Mortals

written by Fire Soul

The trip through the Everfree was never a difficult matter for her. Truth be told, she felt far more at home in the Everfree than she did out in the rest of Equestria. Zebrica was a place of constant climate change, with nothing so gaudy as having an entire race dedicated to controlling it. Before zebras met ponies, control of the weather was something thought only possible by great gods beyond the comprehension of mere mortals.

When she arrived back at her home, she considered emptying out the cauldron and cleaning it, but she had more pressing matters to attend to. Specifically, she needed to dig up a particularly special box out from a plot of dirt behind her hut. She had information that needed to be relayed, and it couldn't wait.

It was a simple task to head into her hut and retrieve the shovel from underneath her bed. She'd been meaning to build a place to store some of her tools outside of her new home, but considering how short-notice her sudden jump from Zebrica to Equestria was, she had to make do. She didn't have any genuine complaints, it was just unfortunate that she hadn't had the time thus far.

It only took her a few minutes to dig up an old metal briefcase from the garden along the back of her home. She gave the case a few shakes with her head while setting her shovel against the side of her home. Small scuffs and marks littered the surface of the briefcase, likely having been buried and dug up numerous times over the years, if the thin shape of those marks was any indication. She glanced around the clearing surrounding her home just in case, then disappeared into her hut once more.

The heavy clunk of the briefcase sounded off as she set it down on one of her workbenches, the deceptive weight almost impossible to determine from a distance. On the outside, it looked like any aluminum case. Most would expect it to be light and easy to carry. In truth, the entire case was made of steel, with a lining of lead keeping the equipment inside of it safe. She gave a quick glance to the safety locks on it just to be sure it was okay. You could never be too careful with stuff like this.

A short moment to enter the codes for the two locks later, and she was pulling plastic off of a series of electronics, very fancy stuff. Griffon-made, Zecora figured, but she'd never cared much about being sure in that regard. It was one of those things where it didn't matter as long as it worked. She slid the battery into place and flipped the power on, hoping that it still had some juice in it.

When she was younger, she figured it was a really complicated radio last time she saw her father using it. She hadn't questioned the strange appearance of the metal phone-like device, or the odd briefcase that seemed to be lit up and constantly flashing strange colors. Now she knew better. She quickly extended a long metal antenna on the top of the phone and dialed a very specific number into it, waiting for someone to pick up. The rule was simple: if no one picked up in four rings, hang up and don't try again until the next day.

Fortunately, the shadow had informed her that her call was expected. With that in mind, she just let the phone ring. One, two, three rings...then a static-y click. She turned to one side and rested against the edge of the workbench, smiling to herself. It was always a satisfying feeling, hearing that voice.

""

Celestia hadn't felt a moment like this in a long time. Over the thousand years since her sister's banishment, she had gotten used to being alone in her room in the mornings. Calm days of raising the sun, preparing to work, lather rinse repeat. Speak with the castle's servants on her way from place to place, maintain the facade of calm and kind delight, which was often more genuine than it seemed, it was all just part of the routine to her.

Now, as she heard the toilet flush for the umpteenth time, she felt a warmth in her chest at the realization that her sister was well and truly back. Not just in the physical sense, but spiritually as well. She'd had a lot of time to reflect on the past since her student's success in retrieving the Elements of Harmony, and it began to dawn on her that things had been going wrong for a very long time. The way her sister had become so withdrawn and reserved, quiet and timid in most if not all matters...how had she not seen it back then? Luna was a patron of the arts, a boisterous and fun-loving individual! She brought cheer to the room and indulged in celebration and vice with the best of them! Had she really been so stupid and unattentive?

"'Tis a marvelous invention Tia, but," Luna said from the bathroom, pausing for only a moment. "Why doth the water swirl clockwise every time?"

Celestia had to restrain her laughter. "I'm not sure, Lulu! I've never asked. Staring into the toilet as it washes my waste away has never really been a thing I prefer to do, so the thought never entered my mind."

"Truly?" she questioned, stepping out of the bathroom with a towel vigorously rubbing at her back. "T'would seem a curiosity that our inquisitive sister would wish to know about. Then again thou hast always been the prudish sort."

"Ponies change, including myself," Celestia responded, taking a moment to enjoy her morning tea. "I learned that sometimes, asking questions is unnecessary."

"Be still our beating heart," Luna mocked, tossing the towel aside on the floor as she approached the table her sister was sitting at, slumping down in front of it with a sigh. "Ooh, we fear we shall be spoiled by these showers! Like hot rain pouring down upon us without pause...."

"You should've seen my reaction when I first took one," Celestia said, thinking back to that pivotal moment in hygeinic practice. "Baths felt unclean after that."

Luna laid her head on the table, eyes drooping in elated relaxation. "We can understand. Plus, we smell like blueberries now! Or, something close to them."

"Scented soaps, Lulu."

"Will the wonders of this new age never cease?"

Celestia jolted when she suddenly felt her yoke vibrate against her breast. Not enough for anyone else to notice fortunately, but her reaction to it got Luna's attention. Without a word, she lit her horn and locked the door to the room, ensuring they wouldn't get any unexpected visitors, then pulled the curtains on the windows and the balcony entrance. She'd been expecting this all day since Zecora had contacted her the previous day about her meeting with Twilight, and she was very eager to hear what she had to say.

Luna sat up from the table and looked around curiously. "What is going on, Tia?"

"I'm about to receive a very important call," she said with a wide smile. "From a friend I met a long time ago, when she was just a little filly."

She removed her crown as well as her yoke and set them both on the table, moving her tea aside to make sure she didn't spill it everywhere. She carefully opened a small slot in the back and removed a small set of earpieces on a flexible cord, along with what looked like a very thin microphone attached to the same metal box inside the opening. She held the microphone in her hoof while the other tucked the earpiece into her ear.

""

"Thou has a wireless phone in thy yoke?" Luna blurted out, coming around the table to get a closer look. "We feel as if we should be surprised, but after thou first showed us a telephone, we took to believing that anything was possible, even without magic."

"Wait until you see a power plant Lulu," Celestia said, already imagining the scenario in her head. "I think you'll lose your mind."

"We shall hold thee to that. If we do not become twitterpated, thou shalt buy us more of that delectable confection known as iced cream!"

"Ice cream. You're aware that as a princess, you can just have the staff bring you some whenever you want?"

"'Tis a matter of principle, sister!" Luna stated firmly, cracking a faint smile. "Who calls for thee, pray tell?"

"" Zecora said over the phone. ""

"" Celestia said, glancing over to Luna. "Would you like to speak to her?"

"What? We do not speak the language thou spoke. Dost thine caller speak Equish?"

"It's called Equestrian now Lulu, and yes, she does," Celestia said, looking down at the microphone. "What about you, Zecora?"

"That sounds fine, your majesty."

Celestia removed the earpiece and hoofed it over to her sister, who just stared at it in confusion. While Luna was by no means incompetent, the nuances of the strange object eluded her. She'd seen Celestia put it on, but this wasn't like when she'd watched someone make use of a toaster a few days back. Luna tentatively took it in her hoof, looking up to her sister then back down at the strange object as if expecting it to jump to life in her hoof and tell her its secrets.

Making an attempt at mimicry, she reached up with it to try and attach it to her ear as Celestia had, but all she managed to do was twist her ear in an odd way and cause herself some pain. She attempted to do so again, only to find her ear twisting in another painful direction. Her irritation with the offending object only grew when Celestia began to hide her amusement behind a hoof. It was often the case with her sister, being as mischievous as she could be. It was a game between them that, even after a thousand years, Luna recognized. Her sister was just looking to get a rise out of her.

She did not take the bait. "How do we....?"

If Celestia was bothered by Luna not playing along, she certainly didn't show it. Instead of appearing disappointed, she kept that same calm, friendly appearance she always had. The 'Princess Face', as Luna once referred to it. It tended to put ponies at ease. Celestia only maintained her calm appearance because she knew, without a shadow of a doubt, that there would be other opportunities to make her sister bristle.

Celestia reached over with her magic and easily hooked the earpiece onto her sister's right ear. "Just like that, Luna."

"Ah, all is well now!" Luna said, clopping her forehooves together in approval before glancing to the microphone in her sister's hoof. "Do we require that as well?"

"Oh, yes, you do," Celestia said, hoofing it over to her. "Think of it as the end of the telephone that you speak into, and it should make sense."

"Of course, of course," Luna said, holding the small microphone in her hoof and turning it this way and that. "Hello?"

"Hallo, your majesty!" Zecora said, smiling to herself. "It is an honor to speak to the Princess of the Night personally! Previously, I have only had the pleasure of speaking with Celestia...and Blueblood, once."

"We recognize that accent...thou art a zebra?" Luna questioned, resting her free hoof on the table. "We did not know zebras had become a part of Equestria."

"Times have changed for the better in many ways sister. However, Zebrica is still its own nation." Celestia said, taking a sip from her tea cup.

"I met Princess Celestia when I was very young," Zecora chimed in. "She has been a family friend for even longer than I have been alive, though my family would appreciate no one knowing of such a connection. We do not desire the kind of attention associating openly with royalty would bring to us."

"Truly? T'would bring great prestige to thy family."

"We do not seek such things," Zecora said calmly. "Simply being able to keep personal contact with royalty is more than enough for us."

"Well...as thou sayest," Luna said, glancing over to her sister. "We admit we are at a loss as to what we should discuss. We have little of significance to speak of outside of discovering technology once thought impossible."

"That's fine Luna," Celestia said smoothly. "I had a few things to discuss with her anyways."

"Ah. Of course," Luna said slowly, glancing down at the microphone in her hoof for a moment. "Perhaps we shall speak again under better circumstances? We give thee permission to refer to us as Luna."

"As you wish, Luna!" Zecora answered, smiling to herself. "My name is Zecora."

"Well-met, Zecora! Er, somewhat, we...have not met face-to-face, but..." Luna began to say, clearing her throat. "Yes, well-met."

"Heh, as you say, your majesty."

Things fell silent between them, and Luna sat there for a time before awkwardly hoofing over the mic and the earpiece. While it wasn't the most tactful way to end a conversation, she didn't entirely blame herself. Being unable to socialize with anyone or anything other than Nightmare Moon would've at least helped, but all she could hear during her time up there was the deafening silence and Nightmare Moon's voice taunting her inside her own head.

Celestia quickly slipped the earpiece back on and took the mic back, glancing over at Luna. "I hate to do this, but what I wish to discuss with Zecora is very private. We'll still go out today, but could you give me, say...ten minutes?"

"Of course, sister," Luna said, standing up from the table and adjusting her wings against her sides. "If our presence is required once more, thou mayest locate us within our chambers."

"Thank you Luna."

The moment Luna was gone, Celestia's mood turned away from the casual happiness it often seemed to be. The news that Zecora had for her could determine whether or not she put a stop to her student's activities, or if she'd continue to allow this...whatever it was. She couldn't have been less sure if she tried. There were certain possibilities, ones she'd already considered, but she didn't remain on her throne by operating on faith and maybe's alone.

She did, however, believe that her student meant well. She put all her hopes on that and took a deep breath.

"" she started, sitting up straighter. ""

"" she stated firmly. ""

Celestia sighed. ""

"<...As you say, your majesty.>"

Celestia cracked a weak smile to herself. ""

"" Zecora replied curtly, glancing out of her window across the room.

""

Zecora ran her free hoof over her mohawk and sighed quietly. ""

""

"" Zecora said, pushing the briefcase to one side while sliding a bottle of red liquid in front of herself. ""

Celestia cringed. ""

""

"" Celestia said graciously, her posture slumping just slightly in relief. ""

Zecora uncorked the bottle and took a small swig from it, just two quick gulps before putting the cork back into the opening. ""

"" Celestia asked.

"" she said, feeling a sudden jolt as the potion settled in her stomach. ""

Celestia took a deep breath and rested her free hoof on the table, leaning her weight on it. "<...I need all the details you can give me before I make any sort of decision.>"

"" she explained, turning to lean her back against the workbench. ""

"" Celestia said, calmly pouring herself a fresh cup of tea. ""

Zecora vaguely shook her head, her ear twitching at the sound of a bird fluttering into a landing on her window sill. ""

""

"" Zecora said, watching the bird casually preen itself. ""

"" Celestia mused, snorting in disgust. ""

"" she said, staring at the bird as it tilted its head this way and that, staring right back at her. ""

"" Celestia almost shouted. ""

"" Zecora responded, holding her free foreleg up towards the bird. ""

""

"" she said, smiling as the bird landed on the end of her hoof and chirped at her. ""

""

"" she said, wiggling her hoof to urge the bird to climb further up her foreleg. ""

""

""

"" Celestia muttered as she lifted her cup to her lips, taking a long drink from it. ""

"" Zecora said, raising her foreleg up to her head, the bird hopping off of her foreleg and onto her mohawk. ""

"" Celestia said, rolling her eyes. ""

"" she answered, gently rubbing over the bird's wing with a hoof. ""

""

"<Don't let her do this.>"

Celestia was silent for a moment. ""

""

Celestia remained silent, lost in thought while her friend spoke. ""

"" Zecora assured her. ""

""

"" Zecora mused, gently petting down the back of the bird's head while it shuffled along her mohawk. ""

"" Celestia said, her smile fading. ""
""

"" Celestia said, standing up and lifting her yoke in her magic. ""

"" Zecora said, giggling briefly. ""

""

""

Celestia nodded and cut the connection with a single pulse of magic over a button on the device inside her yoke. She pondered the situation while she coiled the cord for the earpiece up, along with the microphone. She had a lot to think about, after all.

Twilight was definitely a wild card, she wasn't going to try to deny that. She wouldn't go so far as to say her student was a madmare, but her mental stability could definitely be called into question. Then again, given what happened to her at such a young age, perhaps she was completely justified in her hatred and psychopathy. Celestia herself certainly didn't hold any love in her heart for the Mafia as an organization.

It would have been very short-sighted for her to consider stopping her student simply because ponies were going to die. While she always preached peace and harmony, she knew that reality rarely conformed to that message. Ponies had differing opinions on things, and sometimes that was all it took to get them at each other's throats, let alone at the throats of races outside of their own. Her ponies had a reputation for being a peace-loving people, but they could be just as nasty and vicious as anyone else, and she knew it.

Ultimately, she had to make a choice between having faith in her student, and shutting down her operations immediately. Regardless of whether Twilight was stopped, ponies were going to die. If she were allowed to tear into them, their retaliation would result in death. If Twilight was stopped, the Mafia's long-term operations would kill more and more. Perhaps a wild card was exactly what she needed to find a vulnerability and exploit it. Put a crack in their metaphorical armor. Then she could hopefully find a way to deliver the fatal blow.

With her yoke and crown back on her person where they were supposed to be, she went through the mental checklist she always did before appearing in public. Shoes, yoke and crown in place? Check. Was her mane as elegant as it was expected to be? Yes. Comforting, motherly smile? Check. Was her fur looking okay? No strange stains or unexpected bunching? Nope, she looked smooth and majestic, just as the world expected from her.

She made sure to give a courteous nod to the guards posted outside of the room as she left, quickly making her way to Luna's room. She could do with some time out of the castle.

For Luna, entering the modern world was like stepping into what she imagined Elysium to be. She hadn't even been out of Canterlot since her return, and she was utterly enchanted by the magnificence laid before her! When she was banished, Canterlot wasn't even a village, to say nothing of being the capital of Equestria. Now everywhere she looked, she saw big, sturdy buildings, ponies going about their daily activities with nary a worry in their minds! It almost brought a tear to her eye when she first saw it all.

The experience was only tarnished by her much smaller appearance in comparison to her sister. She had always been much shorter than Celestia, though certainly bigger than most mortal mares, but she looked like she was in her teens! Even her mane and tail lacked the royal elegance that was expected from someone in her position of power. She knew her body would grow in response to her power as it returned, but as it stood, she had to put up with her sister patting her on the head like a foal.

"Tia, we are aware of the fact that thou hast a thousand years of sibling rivalry to make up for," Luna started, snorting as a gold-clad hoof came down on the top of her head again. "But wouldst thou cease thine actions?!"

"Aww, but you're so tiny now! You won't be this way forever, how could I pass up the opportunity?" Celestia asked, pointedly patting Luna's head just a little more firmly. "My widdle sister~!"

Luna could feel the heat on her cheeks rising as she noticed more ponies staring at the two of them. Celestia had always been like this, but nowhere near as bad back then as she was now. While it was annoying, she'd usually put up with it, but she already stood out enough without Celestia treating her like a little filly.

It wasn't like Luna didn't appreciate the sentiment. Even for beings as long-lived as her and her sister, a show of affection was always welcome. It came in the form of a very embarrassing display, but she didn't mind, not deep down. Let them stare and judge all they wished, there was something nostalgic about her sister behaving the way she was in that moment.

What Luna could've done without however, was all the ponies attempting to strike up a conversation with them. She was suffering from a thousand years of separation from her people, but some things simply never changed...such as the ass-licking of the upper class, trying to get far more than they could ever need. She'd never had the patience for them, save for a select few genuinely servile and honest ponies that hadn't been tainted by the wealth and power they held.

It was possible that she blanket-judged in the past. She would not deny that.

What was even worse about all of them trying to talk with her was the difference in dialect. They spoke the same language, but Equish had changed drastically, to the point that she sometimes had to pause and think about what her own sister was saying to her. It sounded so...low-brow now. A common tongue for common ponies, one that even her sister spoke. There was no sign of the old dialect save for her, and it made her feel self-conscious. It was obvious to her that others had to take time to decipher what she was saying as well.

Then there was the simple fact that she had nothing to talk about. The new technologies of the modern day made something as marvelous as the doughnut seem like a paltry accomplishment, to say nothing of the opulence of Canterlot's roads. In her day, flattened roads and cobblestone were considered more than adequate, but now the roads were paved with a remarkable substance called asphalt, and many of the buildings were made in layers instead of simply being made with wood or solid blocks of carved stone. Even if they were, they were made from bricks. Bricks! There was so much to discover that she felt she would never catch up!

Thus it was that she found herself falling silent in most conversations. Most of them ceased to try to keep her attention once it was clear that she wasn't the talkative sort, not yet at least. While all of these things had her curious, and the concept of them demanded her attention, what she was interested in was the artistry of the modern era.

Once upon a time, her night stood for more than just the dark and sleep and dangerous, unknowable horrors. It reflected her love for artistry, creativity in all forms...and passion. She had no love for stallions in the bedroom, but passion? Passion had no true gender. Even a straight mare could find the passion of another mare intoxicating, if she had an open enough mind...and perhaps if she wasn't quite as straight as she thought she was. The same could be said for anyone, really.

It was sad to hear from her sister that ponies were still so closeted about their deepest passions. Even worse that less carnal passions were often snuffed out by their peers, or circumstance, or any number of other variables. Where were the great artists? The painters of grand murals, the sculptors, the musicians, the playwrights with their grand theatrical displays?

"...wouldn't you say, your majesty?"

Oh. Was someone talking to her?

She blinked when she noticed eyes on her, glancing rapidly between them before standing up with a more regal posture. "A-apologies! We were lost in thought, we did not hear thee."

The posh stallion that stood before her didn't entirely offend her senses, but he definitely had a presence about him, far beyond most nobles. The mare that stood alongside of him was the same way, but in an entirely different way...not to mention she was beyond attractive in Luna's eyes. To Luna, this long-legged, pale pink mare looked so elegant and graceful, she wished to pounce upon her in the street!

"Quite alright, your majesty!" he said, using his magic to remove his monocle and clean it with a silk cloth he retrieved from his pocket. "I imagine a great many things are still overwhelming, least of all foreign trade policy."

"I spoke to them about you a few days ago Luna," Celestia quickly explained. "Luna, meet Fancy Pants and Fleur de Lis, Lord and Lady."

"Yes, how rude of me to address you without a formal introduction!" Fancy stated in a jovial tone, holding out a hoof to Luna. "A pleasure to make your acquaintance."

Luna quickly took his hoof with her own. "The pleasure is all ours, Sir Pants."

"Sir Pants!" he barked, letting go of Luna's hoof and setting his monocle back in place. "Now there's something no one's ever called me before. Something comedic about it, wouldn't you say, Fleur my dear?"

"Oh, w-we did not intend to...." Luna tried to say, but she found herself floundering for words.

"Now, Fancy," Fleur chimed in, gently smacking his foreleg with her hoof. "We discussed this! No teasing her, mon amour."

Luna watched them for the moment the silence lasted, trying to place yet another strange accent. She'd found herself becoming accustomed to them more and more as she explored this strange new world. The amazing glowing boxes called televisions and the radio, letting ponies communicate through sound and visuals from across the country, and how multi-cultural Equestria had gotten, it was often overwhelming. Fleur's accent was something familiar from back in her own time though, from an at-the-time foreign country. Judging by a map Celestia had shown her, that country had been taken over by Equestria as time went on. She could only guess the takeover had been a peaceful one.

Luna looked up at the tall mare as she approached. "Your sister has said a great many things about you, Princess Luna."

"Yes, t'would seem many ponies have had many things to say about us since our return," Luna said, recalling a particular news broadcast she'd seen on television. "Yet much the same as when our sister does as such, we have been informed that we cannot go out to smite them."

"In some cases, that is quite a shame," Fleur said, approaching Luna and holding out her hoof. "It is very nice to meet you, princesse. Charmé."

Suddenly, it clicked. "Prench!"

Fleur blinked twice and pulled her hoof back in surprise. "Quelle?"

"Thine accent!" Luna said, reaching out to accept Fleur's hoof, albeit a little more forcefully than Fleur would have liked. "It is hard for us to believe that the Prench language hath retained itself all these years later."

"Oh! Oui, I grew up in Prance," Fleur said, gently shaking Luna's hoof before stepping back. "I met Fancy there as well. What fundraiser was it, dear?"

Fancy cracked a smile and lowered his head in thought. "I think it was the fundraiser to get a working planetarium built in one of the museums there. It was more than ten years ago, and we've both been so busy, I don't remember all the details."

"A planetarium? We find ourselves curious what this planetarium is."

"To put it simply your majesty, it is a place that can display our entire solar system to teach people that come to watch it," Fleur explained, leaning her side against Fancy's. "We have both always found the stars intriguing."

"Oh! Truly?" Luna asked, suddenly a whole lot more invested in the conversation. "What about it intrigues thee?"

Fleur flashed a delighted smile. "It is si majestueux! The night is dark and mysterious, but under a full moon, oh, it is so pretty! The stars, they shine so far beyond us, I can't help but wonder if we'll ever be able to reach them ourselves."

"I've heard news from the griffons that they've begun working on technology capable of performing such a feat," Celestia said, glancing between the three of them. "I've heard rumors that some of our ponies have expressed interest in such a thing as well."

Fancy Pants quickly nodded, smiling. "Yes, it's become something of an interesting topic of discussion among the nobility, but many of them regard it as a kind of...niche interest. Something to throw your money at without any expectation of a return on the investment."

"'Tis a shame, truly," Luna mused, gazing up at the sky. "We would love to see such a view. What does this world look like from outside of it, we wonder?"

"Oh, you didn't see it from up there?" Fancy asked, before his eyes widened in alarm. "Er, terribly sorry, that must've sounded very insensitive."

"No offense hath been taken, Sir Pants," Luna said, waving it off. "No, we were lost in a state of thoughtless sleep. When we didst awaken, we found ourselves a puppet of the Nightmare, sharing its memories. It did not see anything more than we did, except through dreams, of which we both remembered very little. T'would seem it picked up modern dialect through them however."

"Oh? Then why don't you speak in a more modern tongue?" Celestia asked, glancing down at her sister curiously.

Luna shook her head. "It does not come naturally to us."

"Habits can be hard to break," Fleur chimed in, smiling. "In any case, have you told her about the giant telescope on the other side of the mountain, princesse?"

"Giant telescope?" Luna inquired, glancing up at Celestia curiously.

"Well, after you were...banished," Celestia said slowly, clearing her throat. "The stars began to move in time with the motions of the sun and moon, with no input from myself or anyone else. They moved in predictable patterns, and people began to get curious. The Canterlot Observatory was built less than a hundred years ago to chart their movements."

While the news alarmed Luna to some extent, she found herself far more intrigued by the development. She had been far too weak since her return to move the moon and the stars as she once did, and as such, she hadn't paid too much attention to it. She'd intended to get to work on her grand tapestry once she'd recovered, but perhaps there was a lot more to it now than she realized?

"It's a tragedy, honestly," Fancy said, frowning. "Took our scholars this long to take a legitimate interest in the stars when the Neighponese, minotaurs, pretty much everyone else has been using their movements to help navigate the seas for hundreds of years already."

"What? Oh dear...this could be a problem for us," Luna said, looking off to the side in thought. "A very serious problem indeed."

"Oh? Why is that?" Fleur quickly inquired.

"Because we do not know what will happen to the stars once we recover our true power," Luna explained, gently tapping the ground with her hoof. "We did not think upon it earlier, but now it is concerning."

"I must agree, but we shouldn't focus on things we can't possibly predict until they either happen or do not happen," Celestia said, looking to Fleur and Fancy with a warm smile. "I would instead prefer to locate the local ice cream parlor."

"Hm! As would your guards, I imagine." Fancy noted, adjusting his monocle as he eyed the ponies in armor behind the princesses.

Ah yes, Luna had almost forgotten about them. The small group of four Royal Guardsponies that had joined them on their outing without a word. It was a testament to their discipline that they hadn't said a word, even fading into the background until she'd completely forgotten about them. It must've been something her sister had deemed mandatory, if they were going to be tailing her everywhere she went. Luna could appreciate their discretion, if nothing else, but she had to wonder what had become of the Night Guard. No doubt they'd been disbanded or absorbed into what the Sun Guard had become since her disappearance.

"Perhaps. I'm sure we can afford ice cream for them as well," Celestia said with a knowing smile, glancing back at them. "What do you all say?"

One of them dared to crack the smallest of smiles on one corner of his muzzle. "Sounds good, your majesty."

"And there you have it!" Fancy said, reaching over to gently hook his foreleg around Fleur's. "We would love to join you your majesties, but we have a spa date to get to. Scheduled a week ahead of time and all that."

"Oui! My dear Fancy cannot function if his moustache is not groomed by a professional," she said, reaching up to flick the end of one side of his moustache. "It is too much to handle, even for him!"

Quick goodbyes were exchanged, leaving Luna to her thoughts once more. The idea of a giant telescope thoroughly intrigued her, though she'd only recently seen a telescope in action, and even that had let her see over great distances. She could see the potential for mis-use in those more reasonably-sized ones, but the thought of a telescope that would require its own facility to house it? How far could she see with one of those?

It wasn't until they'd reached the ice cream shop that Luna had snapped out of her daydreaming. The parlor was surprised to see a visit from royalty, but they weren't going to let that stop them from doing their very best. Of course, the ice cream parlor was a popular locale for the younger ponies of Canterlot to spend their time, so it was inevitable that Celestia's presence was going to draw their undivided attention. Soon, Luna could only watch over a small bowl of triple chocolate fudge as her sister was accosted by her many tiny fans that basked in her motherly presence.

All except for a select few.

It came as a surprise to her when she heard a young voice call out to her from directly behind her, even going to far as to bite down on the end of her tail and tug on it. She turned just in time to see three very meek little fillies crowded around behind her, returning their curious stares for a moment before they averted their eyes. She was just as nervous as they were, though she loathed to admit it. She never was all that great with kids of any species, but it seemed they were demanding her attention in some way.

"Er...hello, children," she said, focusing her attention on the one in the middle of the three. "How may we help thee?"

"What?" one of them responded, tilting her head.

Luna blinked once in confusion. "We asked how we could help thee. Is there something thou desires?"

"Um...you talk funny," the one on the left said. "Are you really Princess Celestia's sister?"

Luna pointedly ignored the insulting remark about her manner of speech. They were only children, how could she ever blame them for the inane things that come out of their mouths from time to time? You may as well fault a blacksmith for making noise when he hammers iron into shape.

"Yes, we are!" Luna quickly replied, glancing between their curious gazes.

One of them gave her a dubious glare. "Then how come I never heard of you before?"

"We were sealed away in the moon a long time ago!" Luna explained, sitting up straighter in her seat. "Did thine parents not tell you the legend of Nightmare Moon?"

"Yeah, but my mom said that was just a story..." the one on the right mused, then pointed up at her. "You don't look like you have razor-sharp teeth that can gobble up foals...."

"Of course we do not have such dangerous teeth!" she said, cracking a grin to flash her pearly whites at the kids. "See?"

The three fillies smiled more at the sight, and giggled among themselves. Luna settled back in her seat and pondered on the situation for a moment, before glancing to the available space around the table. She wasn't good with children, but there was no reason to be rude...and they were certainly friendly enough.

"Would you care to join us?" Luna asked, using her magic to grab a few chairs from the empty tables nearby.

To say that they were eager was an understatement. They scampered up onto those seats despite not even having purchased any ice cream yet, perfectly content to spend time with the princess they didn't know nearly enough about. As it stood, all they knew for sure was that Luna wasn't Nightmare Moon...something Luna could appreciate. Instead of judging her for her past mistakes, they were curious, and their incessant questions just kept coming the longer they sat there.

Luna caught Celestia's gaze out of the corner of her eye, but chose to say nothing to her, instead giving her new acquaintances her full attention. They had problems understanding exactly what she was saying sometimes, but for the most part, they could follow her. She found herself enjoying the conversation, if only because it felt good to have some positive attention for once, instead of suspicion and caution like with a lot of the castle's staff.

It hadn't become a huge issue just yet, but from the few times she'd gone out in public and accidentally eavesdropped on conversations around the castle, her arrival had caused some unrest. It was almost unfair how little backlash her sister had gotten for altering historical documents, but as she understood it, the most she suffered were allegations of falsification. She'd technically never altered history...she'd just buried the books in the deepest, darkest proverbial pits of Equestria's libraries she possibly could. Apparently they all could've still been found, you just needed to know exactly what books you were looking for.

She could understand everyone's apprehension towards her. That didn't mean it didn't cut deep. Or rather, it re-opened old wounds, but at least now she had a clear enough head to realize they were viewing her in such a way because of her own actions. Even with a stomach loaded with ice cream and the lingering good feeling of those children being so curious about her, she couldn't quite shake the self-loathing it filled her with.

"So...did you enjoy your time with those children?"

Luna turned her gaze up from the ground and looked over at her sister knowingly. "Yes, we did. No doubt something our sister planned ahead of time."

"I don't know what you're talking about. I'm just looking out for my little sister," Celestia said, never once looking down at Luna. "I've been hearing such awful rumors about her lately. I thought she might appreciate a chance to meet less judgmental ponies."

"And thus, the manipulator rears her head once more. Not that we did not see her coming," Luna mused, looking away and watching a pair of ponies walk past them. "How far back did thy plotting and scheming commence?"

Celestia's perfect smile faded, replaced by a sly smirk. "The moment you made it clear just how much you loved ice cream. It's a favorite among little fillies and colts as well."

"We are tempted to believe that a dig at our perceived physical age. We are a benevolent ruler, however! We shall forgive thee." she teased, focusing in on a stallion that was staring at her.

Celestia, while sometimes seeming aloof to people, often noticed things no one else did. She just never reacted to it. Her life was one of practiced and masterful self-control and a constant, earnest effort to understand her subjects as best she could so she could make the most informed decisions on matters of state as well as more personal matters. However, she knew for a fact that many of her ponies didn't perform the same courtesy, even for their own benefit. She didn't need to hear the rumors circulating and see the rude stares to know that, it was a simple fact of life.

It was the main reason she said nothing while her sister stared that stallion into submission. A shame there were three other people staring just to her right, just barely where they thought her line of sight ended. She'd spotted them out of the corner of her eye, and above all else, she could hear them. It would've only caused her sister more pain if she chose to confront them though, so she let it be. She only hoped that Luna hadn't heard it.

When the stallion finally broke eye contact with her, Luna looked away. "So. Out of curiosity, is there some kind of art museum or establishment nearby? We have seen nothing of modern art outside of television and music since our return. Perhaps the occasional statue here and there, but...."

"Well, I had heard something about a play tonight, from one of the staff," she mused, thinking back on the conversation. "I believe she said it was a play called Moulin Rouge. I've never seen it."

"Perhaps we shall look into that," Luna mused, looking back at the guards for a moment before looking up to Celestia once again. "Dost thou think Lady Sparkle would enjoy going to see a play?"

Celestia gave Luna a sidelong glance. "...I suppose she might. You can only know if you ask her."

"Problem, sister?" Luna asked. "Dost thou fear we may poach her from thee?"

"No, nothing like that, Luna," Celestia responded, motioning for her to follow. "I just feel that you've already forgotten what I told you. You're barking up the wrong tree."

Luna hmph'ed and waved her off. "Thou knowest nothing of our love life! We-!"

Celestia quickly interrupted by placing a golden-clad hoof over her muzzle. "Yes, Luna, you're correct, but perhaps yelling about it wouldn't be in anyone's best interest?"

Luna's eyes quickly glanced this way and that. Around them, a few ponies had stopped to see what the fuss was about, but among them, Luna could see the elite. The well-dressed, the nobles of Canterlot. She'd just given them a lot of juicy information to gossip about if they heard what she'd said about Twilight as well, and that alone chilled her to the core.

In her time, gossiping about the royal family could be punishable in very vicious ways, especially if the gossip or rumor-mongering was hostile in nature. These days, as far as she knew, misinformation was one of the most difficult things to punish anyone for, let alone a news outlet. There were numerous other factors to consider as well, such as the fact that Twilight might not appreciate such attention, from her or from the journalists she'd already had hounding her for days before they were temporarily banned from the castle. She was lucky she got to use the bathroom without one of them trying to pester her.

She had no doubt in her mind that if given the chance, they'd spin something like what she'd just said completely out of context, and would be utterly unapologetic about it if it turned out to be untrue. But then, if she spent even a bit too much time around Twilight, they would start coming up with their own stories as to why they were together so much. There was no real way to win, as far as she could see, aside from being more discreet.

"We...suppose," Luna muttered, glancing up at her sister. "We may just ask her then. We still need to apologize for the injury she sustained at our hooves."

Celestia barely suppressed a relieved sigh, her smile finding its way back onto her face. "I'm sure she doesn't blame you for what happened."

"Perhaps. Surely she would appreciate the gesture regardless."

They walked for a time in silence, only stopping once they'd arrived at the hall where the play would be at. The guards were a few lengths behind them at all times, keeping an eye out while doing their best to not get in anyone's way, just as they were trained to do. Once Luna had her ticket, Celestia decided to take her to have a taste of some of the finest donuts in town, leading her away from the richer area of Canterlot and into a section of town that was just a bit less obsessed with sticking its proverbial nose up into the sky.

Luna smirked as the crowd began to thin, glancing up at her sister. "We believe thou art simply jealous and unwilling to admit it. We shall have thy student chasing our tail instead of thy rotund posterior."

Celestia just rolled her eyes at that and patted her sister on the head again, continuing along.

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Chapter 33 - An Old 'Friend'

Chapter 33 - An Old 'Friend'

written by Fire Soul

You know what really, really sucks? Fucking up your sleep schedule. As a very order-oriented pony, there is inevitably a lot of routine in my life. Get up, brush my teeth, use the toilet, shower, check to see if my fur's presentable, all that stuff. I don't question it, I just do it because it's my morning routine. Rather, it's my routine when I wake up. I mean, I'd done it a lot in the past, it was kind of a thing for me when I was trying my hardest to keep up with my studies while doing work for the Mafia, to say nothing of stake-outs and hunting my targets, but it still sucks.

It's very strange to wake up at seven in the evening, sun's down, and you feel like you're getting ready for your day. There's just something that feels off about it, like you're breaking out of the norm and stepping into alien territory. For me, the problem laid in the fact that I didn't have access to my personal library out here, and I doubted that there were any late-night activities available in a small town like Ponyville. I certainly couldn't practice my magic all night, not that my horn felt very up to it after the strain I put it through, so I wasn't sure how this was going to work out for me.

My stomach noisily gurgled while I was in the shower, and I realized that I was very hungry. Maybe I could start there, to kick off my night. When I went downstairs, I found Spike and Fluttershy seated on the living room sofa, watching a television show while several animals sat around them on the floor, watching the TV as well. Well, Angel was perched comfortably on top of Spike's spined head, but other than that, the animals were staying off the couch.

"...and that's all there is to it Martha!"

"How dare you, you...you animal!" a female voice chimed in from the TV. "I can't raise five children on my own! They need a bull in their lives!"

"Well it's not gonna be me, honey!" the gruff male responded. "I've got places to be, and they're far away from here."

Ah. Some minotaur soap opera. That would explain the occasional sniffle from Fluttershy as the show progressed. Personally I could never get into shows like that. They're way too bland and predictable for me. I was willing to bet money that if someone wasn't already in the hospital with some kind of grievous, possibly fatal injury, they would be soon. I wonder how many of that cow's kids are actually the bull's best friend's offspring?

"He's a jerk!" Spike stated with a pout, shoveling a handful of popcorn into his mouth from the oversized bowl in his lap. "He should stay. She wants him to stay 'cuz she loves him."

"O-oh, yes, she does Spike, but he's so unhappy!" Fluttershy said, sounding as if she were on the verge of tears. "Grace is his true love, all the way in Griffonstone!"

Spike crossed his arms over his chest stubbornly. "Then he should've been with Grace instead."

Fluttershy smiled through her weepy sniffle. "Everyone makes mistakes, Spike. Some worse than others."

"So are you saying that the kids were a mistake, or he was making a mistake staying with her?" I asked, walking over towards the sofa and sitting down next to it.

Fluttershy violently jolted where she sat, and I could see that she was struggling to resist the reflex to grab the nearest huggable thing and hold it close. Lucky for Spike, considering I knew for a fact that she was stronger than she looked. His head would've popped off like a doll's if she'd gotten the right kind of grip on him.

"Wh-oh! Twilight!" she almost shouted, her surprise quickly giving way to a cheery smile. "How're you doing now?"

I shrugged. "Eh, better. My magic still feels weird. You know those cramps you get from doing too much physical labor at once? That's kinda what my horn feels like, or the closest thing I can compare it to."

"I could massage it!" Spike said, holding his claws up in the air.

I quickly waved him off with a hoof. "No, you can't really massage this away Spike, but thank you. It'll just take time to recover from it."

"Aw...okay."

"Don't worry Spike, I'm sure you'll have plenty of other chances to show off what your claws can do," I said, using my weakened magic to levitate a few popcorn kernels into my mouth. "So! What're we watching?"

"The Unhappy Eight," Fluttershy said, pointing to the screen. "It's a show about a cow and a bull that've been together for a few years, but the bull wants to be with a mare living in Griffonstone, but he and the cow already has five kids, and they're both really unhappy with each other...."

"And the kids aren't happy living with unhappy parents, the mare's unhappy...Unhappy Eight. Got it," I said, chewing the popcorn in my mouth for a moment. "Sounds about right for a soap opera."

"It's such a tragic love story," Fluttershy said, her voice trembling. "I feel so sorry for all of them!"

"The only soaps I can really get into are the kind you find in bathrooms and kitchens," I muttered, rubbing the remaining drowsiness out of my eyes with a hoof. "I prefer action movies. The more over-the-top and ridiculous, the better."

"I like cartoons," Spike added, holding a handful of popcorn in front of himself. "Like Roadrunner and Mickey!"

"Oh, I love Mickey!" Fluttershy chimed in, drawing her attention away from the show on the TV for a moment. "He's so whimsical."

I flashed a devilish grin. "I prefer more slapstick comedy myself. I usually watch whatever cartoons Spike's watching at the time though, when I'm not busy."

"Yeah, mom does lots of stuff, but she always comes home," he said, pausing to munch a mouthful of popcorn. "An' thpend time wih me."

"Spike! Don't talk with your mouth full!" I scolded him, frowning. "Where're your manners?"

"Thorry!" he said, flecks of crunched-up popcorn spewing from his mouth.

I would've smacked my muzzle with my hoof if it weren't for the brace. "Swallow before you talk again."

"Well I think that's great," Fluttershy said to me, scooting over and patting the spot next to herself, between her and Spike. "Being a single parent usually means you hardly ever have the time or energy for your child."

I moved over and hopped onto the couch, sitting back and getting comfy between the two of them. "How would you know?"

"Oh, it's just what I've heard," she said, leaning back until her weight let her sink into the backrest. "Ditzy Doo's the mailmare that delivers to this part of town, and she works twelve-hour shifts almost every day just to make ends meet. She's got a foal too."

"Oh...well, that's unfortunate for her."

"Hey mom?"

"Yeah hun?"

He pointed at my middle. "Why're you naked?"

"Huh. So I am," I mused, looking down at myself. "Guess waking up at night threw me off more than I realized."

"Sure it isn't because you're comfortable here?" Fluttershy asked.

"I don't even walk around naked in my own home most of the time," I explained, shrugging. "Still pretty sure it's because I woke up in unusual circumstances. Didn't even think of it."

"Isn' that bad?" Spike asked, the telltale crunch of popcorn emanating from his maw.

I looked down at myself, then shrugged. "No, I think it's fine. I'm alright here."

"Something wrong with being naked at home?" Fluttershy asked me, never looking away from the TV.

"Canterlot's a city full of paparazzi just looking for some scandal or quick cash catching a noble in a compromising position in their own home," I explained, reaching over to pick up a few kernels in my hoof. "Can you imagine how many paparazzi I probably have following me around after the whole Nightmare Moon thing? They were enough of a problem back when I was just known as Celestia's student."

"That sounds like a big problem," Fluttershy said, reaching around in front of me to get some popcorn from the bowl. "I hope that doesn't become an issue."

"Eh, I can deal with it if it does," I mused, shoving the popcorn into my mouth and, unlike Spike, took the time to chew and swallow it down. "So, who's doing who and what's happening right this moment to shake up all their lives?"

As Fluttershy began to all-too-happily talk me through a lot of the recent events, I began to veg out. It didn't particularly interest me, but she seemed excited to get to talk with me about it, so I lended her enough of an ear that she couldn't say I wasn't listening to her. It was one of those moments when you're sitting on a couch with friends, and they've got a show on that you just can't enjoy, but you take the opportunity to just chill out and give your mind some rest and maybe exchange some banter with them in the process. I mean, the only times I'd experienced that was with people I worked with back in the day, but the idea was the same. I'd hesitate to call any of those people my friends, however...aside from Shady maybe.

As the clock hit eight and the show ended, I heard a familiar yawn from a certain baby dragon next to me. Fluttershy had gotten cozy leaning herself against my side as the news kicked on, and Spike finished off the bowl of popcorn. That wasn't the 'I'm really bored' yawn, that was the 'it's nearing my bedtime and I'm really starting to feel it' yawn. I only sat there for around ten more minutes before I ushered him off to the bathroom so he could get his teeth taken care of and get ready for bed. Angel migrated from Spike's head to his animal cage in the meantime.

It was only ten minutes later that Spike was curled up on the couch next to me, wrapped up in a blanket. I gave it a little more time, and when I was sure he was out for the count, I slipped carefully off of the couch and motioned for Fluttershy to follow me. I slowly opened the front door with my magic, and stepped outside, closing the door behind both of us with a soft click.

"What did we come out here for?" she asked, walking a few steps away from the front door.

"I'm thinking of heading into town, seeing what's going on, that sort of thing," I answered, motioning towards the cottage with a hoof. "I know I've been doing it a lot, but...would you mind keeping an eye on Spike again? I'd just sleep, but I don't think I'd get very good sleep after sleeping all day."

"Oh, that's fine, Twilight," she said, fluttering her wings as she stepped closer to me. "He's asleep already, and I was going to head to sleep soon as well."

"Well...if it's okay with you, then I guess I should get dressed and take off," I said, shrugging. "I'll try not to come back drunk and noisy, if only so your animals don't maul me once I step through the door."

"I'm not sure how late anything's open in town myself," she explained, taking one more step towards me. "I try not to go out when it's dark."

"Yeah, you don't seem the type," I said, giving her a quick once-over. "There a reason you're trying to edge closer to me?"

She gave me a sly smile and smoothly unfurled her wings. "Oh, you know...this."

The way she moved was akin to a cat as she closed the distance between us, weaving her head to one side and nuzzling her cheek against the side of my neck while her chest pressed against my own. The soft touch of her wings encompassed my withers almost completely, and her cheek nuzzled up along my neck to my own cheek, while her forehoof curled behind my own, lifting it less than an inch and holding it between us. I curled my hoof around hers in turn and lit my horn, my magic spreading over her middle and urging her closer, eliciting a surprised squeak from her. She looked back at the aura of magic brushing through the luxuriously soft fur of hers, then looked to me, her half-lidded gaze boring into mine as she gently touched her lips against my own.

I eased my head back and giggled. "You know, I said it once and I'll say it again, you are a really saucy mare for someone named Fluttershy."

Her smile widened and she gave me a quick smooch on the lips. "I'm not hearing a complaint in that sentence."

I gave her cheek a brief nuzzle with my own. "No, definitely not."

What happened next was nothing short of a thing of beauty, if you were to ask me. I could feel her press into me while her hoof pulled at my own, urging me to respond as her lips met mine once again. There was nothing quick about that sultry touch, or the gentle caress of her tongue against my lips. There was a kind of gentle urgency to the way she was pressing against me, and it was only a second later that I opened my mouth to kiss her back, that tongue of hers sliding into my mouth and running over my own.

She only held the advantage against me for a very brief moment. While she certainly had the disarming allure and curves that would make any red-blooded stallion or pony of dual gender feel ten degrees hotter just at the sight of her, I wasn't some idiot stumbling over her hooves trying to figure out how to deal with an attractive mare. On top of that, I had my magic. The small amount of magic I had around her midsection spread over her body, right under the base of her wings and up to her withers, firmly pushing her back while I stepped forward at the same time.

She responded exactly as I expected her to. She fell back onto her rump while her wings released me from their downy grip, fluttering in surprise from my sudden boldness. I sat down as close as I could to her, our breasts still pressing firmly together, fur intermingling and our racing hearts thumping against one another. Now I could put my forelegs to better use...like running them down her sides, caressing the softer fur that's usually hidden under her folded wings and gripping her in a way that was a lot more physical than my magic could be. Non-unicorns tended to appreciate that more, though there were some that enjoyed the out-there feeling of being handled by something that could encompass their entire body.

Her forehooves trembled as she pressed them against my breast, sliding them slowly up toward my withers while she tilted her head to the left, a muffled moan humming between our muzzles that made my heart skip a beat and my loins surge with excitement. What else could I do but respond in kind? I tilted my head in the opposite direction and our lips parted only lightly, but the gentle wet smack of two ponies kissing only became that much more pronounced now that we were both diving completely into the act.

Soon, my forelegs wrapped around her and insistently pulled her closer, the startled moan that she let off only bringing a smile to my face as she slid a few inches forward and was forced to sit up straighter thanks to our bodies being so close together. I had to do the same, but I didn't mind in the least. I could feel those trembling forehooves sliding up and encircling my withers, holding me tight and pulling at me just as eagerly. She wanted more of this just as much as I did, as my swelling stallionhood could attest.

I couldn't tell you how long it lasted. Could've been twenty minutes or an hour, but I didn't really care at the time. My hooves wandered over her body wherever they could, brushing over that smooth and soft fur of hers, teasing around the base of her wings, even going down to rub over her flanks and cutie marks, which made her do the cutest little discreet wiggle against me. I found a fondness for toying with her wings during it all. She fluttered and flapped them every single time I so much as brought my hooves near them! I think she was nervous about me touching them...or maybe she was excited by the prospect. Really hard to tell at the time.

I swear, it was enough to make a pony go full Shakespeare.

How could I describe such elegance? Such beauty within my grasp, as every sensual sway and gentle trill of heavenly bliss set my heart and soul ablaze? Should I describe her coat, so soft and so pure? Perhaps the gentle flutter of her wings, or the sweet taste of her love-parched lips against mine own would do. No, no justice can be done. For a mare so pure yet full of carnal want, nay, hunger, there can be no words. Only feeling.

Or I dunno, some stupid, flowery bullshit like that.

When we finally parted, it was a slow, and languid thing. Her muzzle dipped below mine and she nosed at my throat, cooing quietly while she burrowed her snout into the fur of my neck. I just sat there and held her close, since she seemed so intent on nuzzling me. I felt strangely exposed, not just because of the erection I was sporting in that moment, but probably also because I was outside, in the open, without any clothes on. Not to mention, I was feeling pretty moist behind my balls.

"Mmm-hm...you really got into that." she mumbled against my neck.

"So did you," I mused quietly, gently stroking a hoof down her back between her wings. "Once again, I must reiterate, we aren't in a relationship."

"Hmm, yeah we are."

Alarms went off in my head. "Uh, no, we're not."

She pulled her head away and smiled at me. "Are we friends?"

"Yeah, course we are."

She leaned in and gave me a small, almost chaste kiss on the lips. "Then we're in a relationship. Just a very unusual one."

I gave her a strange look. "By that logic, I'm 'in a relationship' with all of my friends."

"No, you've just got a normal relationship with them. Just good friends," she said, leaning back and looking down between us. "Ours, however...."

I felt my cock twitch when her hoof pressed down on the head and gave it a flick, making my length sway slightly. I could barely see the precum leaking from the tip, and I was willing to bet she'd gotten some of it on her hoof. She didn't hesitate to raise her hoof and lick the edge of it clean.

"Ours is very strange."

I snorted and shook my head. "Are you trying to push my buttons, filly?"

"Only because you didn't push mine last night." she retorted, giving me an exaggerated pout.

"Yeesh, I can't help but wonder what you're like when someone isn't around to keep you satisfied."

"I'm pretty calm actually," she said, pressing her hoof against my chest. "But right now you're here...and I'm tempted."

"More like you're a temptress," I teased, slowly releasing her from that embrace and getting to my hooves. "As much as I'd love to take you to your bedroom and elevate your voice a few octaves, Spike's in the house and I'd rather not he hear us or wander in and ask what I'm doing putting my plug into your slot."

She stared up at me pensively for a moment, then let out a frustrated sigh. "Fine. I understand."

She stood up as well, her wings folding against her sides while I tried to calm myself down. My heart was still beating pretty fast, and if my erection was any indication, I was very much feeling the stimulation still. It didn't help that her eyes were drawn to it like a moth to a flame. I could see her glancing down at it a few times while we stood there, or at least, she was looking down towards my barrel.

"Are you heading back to Canterlot, soon?"

I gave a small nod. "Yeah, heading back tomorrow I think. I'm expecting some phone calls and I really need to get my new place in order."

"Next time you stop in..." she said slowly, biting her lip. "I mean, Spike's a dear and I like watching him, but...m-maybe you could find a foalsitter for him next time you visit?"

"Well I can't make any promises, but I'll see what I can do," I said, looking up at the stars in the sky. "I'd hate to keep him from the few new friends he's got now."

She hummed pleasantly and turned her side to me. "Well then, next time I'll make sure to have some whip cream and maraschino cherries ready! I want a Twilight sundae."

"Ooh! Throw in that collar you like to wear and you've got a deal," I said, stepping up next to her and pressing my side against her own. "Kitty-cat."

Her only response was a playful meow and a cat-like nuzzling of her body against my own, her entire side running along my body while she ducked her head under my chin. She could do a very convincing purr, I had to admit. I couldn't replicate the sound no matter how hard I tried. Then again I can't even roll my R's, so what chance do I have of faking a purr?

With the seductive pegasus dealt with, though not in the way I would've preferred, we both headed back inside. I would've waited for my swelling to go down if you know what I mean, if only to spare Spike the sight, but let's have a real talk about that sort of thing here: it's not a very unusual sight. Stimulation happens every day, whether it be in a pony's mind or from outside influence, and for the most part, ponies are nudists by nature. Seeing floppy stallion dick at an early age isn't strange unless you're unbelievably sheltered. It's still kinda embarrassing to fall out of your sheath in public because it shows how bad you can control yourself, but hey, it happens.

Obviously, I don't know a lot about what that feels like. I don't usually go outside without clothes on.

It didn't take too long for me to get myself under control, thankfully. Fluttershy didn't make it easy on me. I swear she was trying to tempt me even as I was walking out the door. That tail-flick of hers wasn't accidental.

Sure seemed to take a lot less time to reach town compared to the previous walks. Maybe that was just because I was more used to the paths by then. Regardless, when I got into town, Ponyville was...very different. I'd gotten only a glimpse of it when I'd gone with Spike and Fluttershy to grab some dinner, but at the time I was busy chatting with Fluttershy. Too busy to do what I usually do in the city.

Walk, observe, and listen.

Growing up relying on my senses to get me out of danger when other options weren't openly available to me gave me an appreciation for my environment, no matter how disgusting it may have been. In Canterlot, if you took a walk around the richer neighborhoods, you got to hear pompous ponies conversing about business deals, gossiping about one another, and in some cases, badmouthing the lower class. If you wandered into the seedier parts of the city, you got to hear a very different tune. Gunshots on occasion, ponies in alleyways conducting illicit deals, a miserable stallion trying to make ends meet being yelled at by his wife for not doing exactly that...the sky's the limit.

Ponyville was alien to me in that respect. I walked between the houses, deliberately stalking the alleyways, and...nothing. Nothing of note, that is. There were the occasional arguments, but they were tempered, controlled and quiet in comparison to the screaming matches I was used to. It didn't matter where I went in town, and I certainly took my time looking around, exploring the place in ways I couldn't in broad daylight. Skulking among the shadows, hiding from the naked eyes of the judgmental innocents of the world.

I almost wished for trouble to find me. The silence was unnerving all on its own. I felt like something would jump out of thin air and suck me into the darkness I took solace in, when I was stalking around like that. It made Ponyville feel too innocent. Usually even in small towns, you can spot a drug dealer, or someone selling off-market firearms, something! Even in Ponyville, how could there be none of that?

It was getting pretty late by the time I decided to put an end to my wandering and settle in at the local bar. Same place Applejack took me to, obviously. If I'm staying in Ponyville, I'm sure not going anywhere else. I remember thinking at the time it was a shame that I didn't have anyone to drink with.

Strange how the fleeting wishes are the ones that usually wind up getting granted instead of the ones that really matter.

The night had started so well for me, too. I went in, walked up to the bar, got myself comfy and ordered a few drinks. I let the warmth of the alcohol spread through my system and the tipsy sensation dull my my senses just a little...but then, I started hearing buzzing. Distinct, unmistakable buzzing that could only come from one source. Not like bees, not like flies, not like mosquitoes.

Changelings.

It's not something most normal ponies would notice. On the contrary, for someone like me, it wasn't all that uncommon. Once you start to dabble in mind magic and you become more aware of such outside influences, there's not really any going back outside of maybe getting your memories wiped. Some knowledge, once gained, cannot be forgotten. It's like muscle memory.

That buzzing was from the presence of a changeling hivemind. Close proximity, it felt like. I'd been exposed to it before, albeit only for a few seconds. Obviously I managed to resist it, or else I wouldn't be here right now, remembering all of this. It's how their Queen does her hypnosis.

Speaking of which...the buzzing was far too loud in the back of my mind for it to be coming from a mere infiltrator. Usually I identify them and leave them be. Changelings gotta eat too, and while I may despise their Queen, I won't get in their way when they're just doing what needs to be done. I'll fuck them up if they try to lay a hoof on me or my own, but other than that, well...I've always had bigger problems.

It didn't take me long to pinpoint the source. If there's one thing I knew about my associate, it was that she didn't make for a very good infiltrator herself. The tall supermodel figure, trim and slick, smooth and glistening auburn fur that appeared to be washed and oiled several times over, with long brown mane and tail that had been combed and brushed to perfection. She was never one for not standing out, even when blending in was the whole point.

She was looking right at me when I finally locked my gaze on her. I took another drink from my mug, and the corner of her muzzle rose into a long, knowing smile. Without a word, she turned to face me and slipped out of her seat, motioning with her head towards a booth further in the back, less lit than a lot of the other booths in the bar. It was of a circular shape, meant for larger groups of people, but there wasn't a lot of life in the bar that night either, so it was no big deal.

The moment we were both seated, I watched her horn light up with a sickly green glow, and I quickly lit my own. "Oh, no no no. I'll be the one casting the spells here."

She stared at me for a brief moment, then shrugged. "Suit yourself."

I quickly weaved the spell I knew she'd had in mind. I'd made a few deals with her in the past, though the first deal was made without my consent, and almost cost me my life. I didn't much trust her not to try to slip something extra into her spell, and I was already a little tipsy as it was. I wasn't going to let her work the magic around us.

As soon as the spell was in place and we had the privacy needed to talk among ourselves, I sat back in my seat. "So. To what do I owe the pleasure, Queen Chrysalis?"

"Mm, nothing in particular," she cooed, leaning closer towards me. "I wasn't expecting you, but since you were here, I thought you probably wanted to talk."

"Huh, so you weren't here spying on me then?"

She pouted at me and purposely slouched. "You always think so little of me, Twilight. What did I ever do to you?"

I gave her a dirty look. "Bitch, you tried to stab me in the back and turn me into a pod-snack."

"You and your ponies were promised to me and you broke the deal," she said dismissively. "If anything, you betrayed me."

"Like I told you, I wasn't informed. If I was, I would've shot you a lot sooner, and probably in the correct part of your chest," I retorted, crossing my forehooves. "Guess it was your lucky night as well as your worst."

"If you didn't know illegal magic, the kind that gets ponies sealed away in stone statues if they misuse it, you'd be sleeping dreams of perfection so you release all of that bottled-up love you've got sealed away in that black heart of yours."

"Says the Queen of Mindfucks," I quickly said, heaving a sigh. "Alright, so what's the real reason you're here? Don't you dare say you're just passing through, a five-year-old could come up with a better lie than that."

She scoffed and waggled a hoof at me. "Ugh, you're no fun. Fine, I'm here checking in on recent events. Maybe it's surprising to you, but an event like you and your friends getting the power to defeat a living Goddess in battle tends to raise a lot of questions. I just have the luxury of being able to get past borders without a problem."

I could feel myself tense up on reflex. "You've been spying on my friends?"

She looked at me with a hint of surprise. "My my. You really have changed. Don't think I didn't feel that. That was a lot of white-hot anger."

"You didn't answer my question," I growled out, leaning closer to her. "Have you been spying on my friends?"

"Ooh, if I could feed off of your fury, I'd be set for weeks," she teased, grinning wide. "When you get angry, you burn like a silent inferno. Celestia forbid anyone ever give that fire a reason to get noisy."

I slammed my hoof down on the table in front of both of us, never moving my gaze away from her. "Answer. My. Question."

"Ugh, fine! You're no fun," she said, leaning a foreleg on the table. "Yes, I have been. Nothing malicious, I promise! Just observing, and taking the time to collect information."

"...Let me be absolutely clear, Chrysalis," I said slowly, reaching into my pocket to pull a cigar from my case. "I might just be tempted to kill you if you dare to lay a hoof on them, directly or indirectly. I'm not in the habit of indirect genocide, but you'll have brought it on yourself and your people."

"Clear as crystal. Mm..." she said, visibly shuddering after taking a look at me. "I can feel that. That's what I like about you, Twilight. You don't hesitate when it matters."

"Yeah, well, that still doesn't explain why you're here."

"Excuse me?"

I used my magic to light my cigar, taking a long drag from it and slowly puffing it out in small balls of sweet smoke. "You didn't need to come here to get a report on my friends. There's another reason you're here. What's going on?"

She stared at me for a time, shifting in her seat while my eyes bore holes in her. I wasn't lying when I said that she wasn't a very good infiltrator. She couldn't even stay calm with someone like me staring at her in such an accusing way.

Eventually, she cracked a smile. "Still as sharp as ever, aren't you Twilight? Age hasn't slowed you down one bit."

"Would you stop trying to evade my questions already?" I asked, sitting back to rest against the seat. "I would think by now you'd understand that that really doesn't work."

She rolled her eyes and slumped in an exaggerated motion. "You really are no fun, even now. Fine, if you must know, I got word of a defective that stole love from the hive fleeing to pony lands, and the last place my changelings had seen him was in Canterlot. They couldn't find him, so I decided to kill two birds with one stone by coming here to look for him myself while investigating you and your friends."

"I'm guessing he's not here then?"

She bared her teeth in frustration, then shook her head. "Unless he's crafty enough to stay hidden from his fellow changelings, no, he's not."

I could've taken a shot at her, but I held my tongue. Changelings rely far too heavily on their ability to read emotions. People like me, who could guard themselves enough to be completely unreadable to her kind, tended to have a big advantage over those connected to her hivemind. The one she was talking about though, he was a free-thinker. All the benefits of a changeling's emotion-reading senses without the deprivation of individuality that most changelings in the hivemind suffered from. Well, I say 'suffer', but Chrysalis prefers to think of them as 'perfectly unified'. Guess when you're sitting pretty at the top of the pile, everything looks just fine, huh?

"Can't say I've noticed any either lately, but then I haven't spent a lot of time in Canterlot the past few weeks," I said, scooting away from her. "Now if you don't mind, I'm going to order a few more drinks, then I'm going to head back to where I'm staying. Sleep schedule's already screwed up enough without me staying out 'til morning, not that there's much of anything to do in this town."

"Oh, where do you think you're going?" she asked, her tone far too sweet to be genuine. "I believe you owe me something."

I was just starting to slip out of the booth when I turned to give her an incredulous look. "The fuck do I owe you?"

The big grin Chrysalis flashed me wasn't very comforting. "Love, my dear. Unless you forgot our agreement? I gave you some information...so where's my love?"

Memories of previous agreements came rushing back to me, forgotten due to how little she and I actually interacted after that first time we worked together. She always had a lot of good information to give thanks to her network of changeling infiltrators, and that had always made her a useful asset for me to keep in contact with...even if she demanded love in return. I'd never given any myself, instead offering my crew, which I could tell always bothered her for some reason. I didn't want to entertain the possibility that she was attracted to me, but I had a hard time coming up with any other reasonable explanation.

"Your information was completely innocuous to my purposes, and you gave it freely," I responded quickly, glaring at her in disapproval. "I owe you nothing."

"On the contrary, I gave you information about my recent operations and gave you the assurance that I mean no harm," she said, purposely licking her lips. "I'd say that information was very useful to you, if only to put your own mind at ease."

It was in that moment that I was given a very clear reminder that Chrysalis had her moments. She was the very center of the changeling hivemind, and she could be far more devious than I usually gave her credit for. She may not have been much of an infiltrator, but I had forgotten to question how much of that was actually an act.

"This was a trap, wasn't it?"

"Yes, and like a fly into a spider's web, you didn't see it until it was too late," she said, leaning in a short inch closer to me. "So...do we still have our agreement? Or will you be making an enemy of me?"

I genuinely debated the possibility at the time. Having Chrysalis as my enemy wouldn't be all that different from having her as an ally, and I use that term very loosely. She had a habit of siding with whomever could benefit her the most at the time, and that wasn't always me. She'd never openly stabbed me in the back, but there was almost always some other motive to anything she did, especially if it involved me and my crew.

Still, making her a full-on enemy wasn't to my benefit, so I hissed in a breath through my teeth and nodded. "Fine. I'll give you love, long as you don't wind up killing me or something."

"No pawns for you to hide your heart behind this time," she said, her hooves suddenly grabbing me by my withers and firmly shoving me against the backrest of the seat, holding me down. "Now pucker up, pony."

It wasn't a kiss that had any kind of seduction or passion to it. It felt more like I was prey, and she had pounced. Her lips felt slightly off, like a pony's but more firm, and a strange jaggedness that made the rough way she was kissing me that much more uncomfortable to me. My hooves flailed briefly, but I didn't want to make a scene, so I tried to settle my tense body down and endure.

This is a good time to note that I've never been fed on by a changeling. Directly, that is. Love could be absorbed through ambience, apparently ponies just exude love like a cloud of energy into the air, but the far quicker method was to force it out. I was unfortunate enough to not have someone else to throw in Chrysalis's path. One changeling I used to know described feeding on ambient love not directed at them with the scenario of a thirsty pony begging for water, and another holding up a water bottle, using a dropper to extract the water, and then dripping the water into the thirsty pony's mouth. The direct method was just the thirsty pony wrestling the water bottle from the other pony's hooves and chugging it.

I could feel it as soon as her tongue forced its way into my mouth, my muffled sounds of alarm dying down as all my attention was commanded by the sensation of warmth boiling through my body. I felt like something was escaping me, being pulled out from my very core, enough to make me feel nauseous and weak. I tried to put up some kind of token resistance by pushing at her with my hooves, but I think she just took that as foreplay. That or maybe she was relishing the chance to finally get some love out of me.

Nothing about the kiss was enjoyable. Her tongue was far too long and dipping down my throat, and her grip was iron-clad, holding me down as my strength began to flag. Her lips mashed aggressively against my own, and she barely gave either of us any time to breathe. Every so often I could see her eyes shift back to their slitted shape and natural coloration, and the more she fed on me, the more listless I began to feel. Emotions rushed through me unchecked, and at one point I think I sobbed, the overwhelming sensation of sadness echoing through me like a lance through my heart. I felt helpless...nor did I feel like doing anything about it.

I fought back a whimper as I tried to reach for anything to bring me out of the sudden rush of despair. I could feel my heart racing, but I just felt so cold. It was only when Chrysalis stopped, when she pulled away from me and licked her lips with a satisfied groan that I gasped for air and slumped forward against the table, trying to catch myself. Just as suddenly as it had begun to crush me, the weight of sadness lifted, and I began to feel at least a little more normal again, not that that was saying much.

"Mm, like wine stowed away for centuries," she trilled, her natural voice coming through in all of its dual-toned glory. "It's always the ones that guard their hearts that taste the best."

I would've loved to give her a witty retort, but I felt like I'd just run ten miles non-stop. I was struggling to catch my breath, and my heart was still racing, my stomach was acting up and the world spun all around me. If she'd gone any longer, I probably would've passed out then and there. A brief glance was given to the crowd, who hadn't seemed to notice anything unusual going on in our corner, thankfully. I turned my head and kept an eye on Chrysalis instead, though I made a point to keep myself on guard. That would've been the perfect time for her to try to mind-control me.

"Don't worry too much, I'm sure you'll be fine," she said, patting me on my wither and scooting away from me and back around to the other side of the circular booth. "Eventually. I do so hope we get to work together again in the future. You're delectable!"

It was only when she finally left me alone and I couldn't detect the idle buzz of her hivemind that I finally allowed myself to relax. Among my many other experiences in my life, that had to be one of the least pleasant of them all. Well...maybe not as bad as having to work as 'insurance' during a pony slave trade deal, but that one hurt my soul far more than it hurt my body. This was certainly a very close contender though.

My breathing felt shallow as I laid myself partially over the table, and I couldn't tell how much time was passing. It was like being lost in a daydream, with only the occasional stimulation from boisterous bar-goers rousing me from my thoughtless daze. When I finally managed to rouse myself enough to get a few more drinks in me, I spent a few hours drinking by myself, trying to keep my distance from anyone else other than the bartender. While I'd never experienced it personally, I'd seen the state of some of my crew whenever she fed on one of them, and they were of far lesser mental fortitude than myself. Very unpleasant to try and deal with.

I think it was...I don't know, I recall three in the morning in my head, but considering the state I was in, it actually could've been sooner or later than that when I finally headed back to Fluttershy's place. I was feeling a bit more in control of myself, at least enough to make the walk back. Since most bars usually close around two in the morning, I figured maybe I left sooner than three. I was drunk, I was exhausted, and all I wanted to do was go and pass out.

Fortunately, I managed to get back to the cottage without any real issues, aside from feeling sluggish all the way. I didn't even want to walk up the stairs to Fluttershy's room, I was so out of it. Instead, I eyed Spike on the couch, curled up under a blanket and laid partially over a pillow. Without a word, I stripped out of my clothes and kicked them off onto the floor, climbing onto the sofa while using my magic to shift him to one side.

"Mmgh...whuh?" he mumbled sleepily, lifting his head to look at me. "Mom?"

"Hey hun. Mom's really tired," I mumbled, flopping down between him and the backrest, laying a foreleg over his back. "Love you."

He wiggled under my grasp and leaned his weight in towards me, yawning. "Love you too mom...."

He was out in seconds once more, both of my forelegs acting as a cover and a new pillow for him while I took the pillow he'd been using to rest my head. It wasn't long after that I was asleep myself, feeling just a bit warmer with Spike huddled so close to me. She'd drained me quite thoroughly, but I don't think she could ever make me feel nothing for my own son.

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Chapter 34 - Return

Chapter 34 - Return

written by Fire Soul

I felt like absolute garbage the next morning. Not just because of the mild hangover, I could've dealt with that no problem, but there were side-effects from being fed on like that that I didn't think I'd been fed on enough to actually encounter, but there it was. I awoke to shallow breathing, a sense of exhaustion despite a significant amount of sleep, and a feeling of not wanting to do much of anything at all. My bladder was screaming at me, and it took me a minute to decide whether I wanted to actually get up and take care of it.

So very slowly, I extricated myself from the way I'd been holding Spike. He was still sound asleep in my forelegs, and while he was a pretty heavy sleeper, I didn't want to jostle him about and make him wake up just yet. From what I could tell with a quick glance through one of the windows, it was definitely still very early. It was possible that played into some of my physical exhaustion, but I'd gotten a whole lot more sleep than he did. He didn't need to be waking up just yet.

Worse than that, apparently I'd been overheating, curled up on the couch. I wasn't sure if that was also a side-effect, but considering how out of sorts I felt, I wasn't going to dismiss the possibility. I still had my clothes on, I felt gross, my fur stunk of alcohol thanks to all my sweating...yeah, a visit to the bathroom was definitely in order. My mouth tasted off and I was sure my breath was atrocious.

Turns out that when you're in that state, getting shit done is a lot harder than it would normally be! Who knew? I could barely focus on brushing my teeth, let alone taking a shower. Eventually I just sat there for a significant amount of time, I don't know how long, I was dazed and just hanging my head, letting the hot water soothe my worn-out body. Eventually I just laid down and let the water soothe me into a state of mild bliss. I could've fallen asleep right then and there.

It was only when I heard the sound of hoofsteps and the door opening that I perked my head up and forced myself to stand. Just as I'd predicted, Fluttershy's head peeked in at me, and I stood there, staring back at her. We both stood there like deer in headlights, though I was sure that I looked a whole lot more out of it than she expected.

"Um...a-are you okay, Twilight?" she asked, looking me over. "You've been in here for a while."

"Whuh? What time is it?" I asked quietly.

"It's almost eight. I heard you start the shower around six-thirty," she said, sounding particularly concerned. "I was getting worried since you've been in here so long...."

"Oh, you don't need to worry about me," I said, forcing myself to stand up straighter. "Just drank too much last night, ran into an old acquaintance I could've gone without seeing again, put me in the wrong mindset this morning...y'know, that kind of stuff. I'm fine."

"You don't look fine," she said, looking back towards the door before slipping away from the curtain, the click of the door shutting barely heard over the noise of the water. "Mind if I join you?"

"Uh...I mean, you can if you want," I quickly answered, moving to give her some room. "Buuut, if you think anything is going to happen...."

"I wouldn't think of it," she said as she slipped into the shower behind me, smiling. "I can tell you're not in the mood. Did you wash already?"

"Nah, just kinda been lazing around in here."

"For almost two hours? Who was this old acquaintance?"

"Just, uh...just someone I really didn't want to meet again," I said, rubbing the side of my head. "It's really hard to think right now."

"Then don't. Just relax," she said, making some noise behind me as she reached for some of the bottles on the alcoves in the wall. "I'll take care of you."

"Oh no, you really don't-"

Her hoof came down on my back, and when I looked back at her, she smiled. "Just relax, Twilight."

I was quickly beginning to learn that Fluttershy was a brand of kindness in the world that people like me felt awkward around. Maybe because she and I were polar opposites, maybe because I just wasn't used to it, but she tended to shower her love and affection on you, and sometimes it just felt off to me. At the same time...it was something I could get used to. I had to believe that, because I was pretty sure Fluttershy wasn't going to change. That was just how she was.

I closed my eyes and let her do her thing, the sensation of her hooves working over my mane and tail hardly noticeable as I began to drift off. Her touch was soothing, and even though I felt sore, I knew the soreness wasn't real. It was just a symptom of what Chrysalis had done to me. Soon her hooves were working over my back and sides, scrubbing the soap through my fur with a brush while I drifted off into blissful relaxation.

One of the first things Celestia had taught me before our lessons really got a chance to start was how to clear my mind. It took some work to do, since I'm not exactly the type to relax when I could be thinking about stuff, or learning, or anything of that sort. I'm a pretty active pony, I'd like to think. Just shutting down and making an effort to think of nothing at all, before Celestia's lessons, seemed pointless and a waste of time. More than that, she told me to take the time to just rest instead of studying as much as possible.

Without getting into a bunch of metaphors about streams and clearing out the garbage you've dumped into it or some shit like that so it flows pure and at full strength, it does help. Much like a pony that works out, your brain needs time to recover from working itself out just as much as your body does after a long day of exercise. Meditation only helped me even more after I got that down.

Thus it was that I fell into that kind of trance-like state while she worked me over in a far less carnal way than I would've liked any other time. She didn't hesitate to wash every part of me, something that was equal parts shameful and relaxing, and by the time it was over, I was on my back, the shower water running down over my lower half, soapy water running past my head and through my mane on its trip to the drain. I laid there and idly watched her wash herself, content to let time pass by without a care in the world.

I was still laying there by the time she was done, already out of the shower and drying herself off. She'd turned the water off on the way out, likely her subtle way of telling me to get up and get moving. All was silent when I finally sat myself up and got to drying off, the bathroom door hanging open. I didn't even bother to throw my clothes on when I finally felt presentable enough to go back to the living room.

Spike was still asleep on the couch, probably because I wasn't up and about enough to wake him up properly. Much like myself, he wasn't a fan of mornings. I would even go so far as to say that if I hadn't drunk plenty of alcohol and hadn't been fed on by a changeling the night before, I probably still would've been really out of it, waking up at the time I did. Fluttershy had what smelled like hay bacon cooking in the kitchen, but at the moment she was walking lightly around the living room, setting feed out for her animals. One of them even made a point of using Spike's back as a perch, a little squirrel munching on a food pellet with five more piled in front of itself.

With nothing else to do, and not really having the mindset to go out and get some exercise in, I sat down on one side of the couch and picked up the remote, turning the TV on. I had to turn the volume up in order to hear it over the munching and chittering and general noise-making of small animals, and I flipped through several channels before settling on the morning news. There aren't usually a lot of good shows or movies on around that time of the morning.

"-and the New Yoke Titans win a heated game this weekend, thirty-six to twenty," the newscaster said, the immaculately-groomed stallion tapping his papers to organize them before continuing. "And now we're moving on to today's news, a gruesome and disturbing discovery made in a steel mill in the southern district, our reporter Katie is live on scene. Katie?"

That got my attention. In the past year, there had been three infamous incidents that've gone down in New Yoke, an alarming trend that always seemed to take place within gang territory. My ears were perked and I tried to pull the world around me into better focus, if only so I could get more of the details. Hopefully they didn't skimp on it.

"Thanks Page," a griffon chimed in when the camera switched over to her. "Directly behind me is the location of a grisly conflict. A steel mill belonging to the Minoan Smelting Company was the site of a violent encounter at approximately 10PM last night. Witnesses report a lot of screaming and gunfire, but no one directly witnessed what happened. All anyone knows is that it ended in just a few minutes, and no one was seen fleeing the crime scene."

The camera feed switched over to what I guessed was a pegasus doing a sweeping overhead view of the mill. I couldn't make out any details from that distance, but from what I could put together, police were still on the scene, investigating. I sat back and relaxed while Fluttershy moved to stand just to my left in front of the couch, watching the TV with me.

The camera feed switched back to the reporter suddenly, and I could see the police scrambling around the area in front of the mill's entrance. "Currently no one is allowed inside, but the police have divulged some information. There were approximately twelve victims, but the bodies are missing with no signs of the bodies ever being moved, suggesting some high-level magic was at work. Furthermore, there are full sets of clothes left behind that seem to match the coloration of a local gang that goes by the name of the Vultures. Almost all of the uniforms had strange, large puncture holes piercing them in various places. Further information is pending a more thorough investigation."

"Oh, goodness," Fluttershy said, looking down briefly as a squirrel rushed up her foreleg to sit in her mane. "That sounds horrible."

"That's the fourth incident in New Yoke this year," I explained quickly, frowning. "Exact same MO too. That's a nasty pattern."

Fluttershy's wings flitted nervously against her sides. "I'm glad I don't live in any of the big cities. I'm content to stay here with my animal friends."

"Maybe you're a rare variant of the crazy cat lady," I teased, lightly nudging her wither with my hoof. "The delightfully attractive animal lady."

Even as Fluttershy gave me a nudge with her wing and walked past to check on breakfast, I was thinking about what could've actually happened there. The overall lack of evidence, the bodies and and discernible sign of how the bodies could've up and disappeared seemingly into thin air told me that both the Mafia and possibly some high-level magic was involved. If that was the case though, the cops would've picked up on it by now. Magic's hard to miss unless they somehow had the time and the means to throw expensive mana crystals around to scramble the magic signature. Those are hard to get your hooves on though, unless you're a Magus.

My head wasn't in the right place for that sort of thing though, so after struggling with my thoughts for a few minutes, I resolved to lay down on my side of the couch and veg out until Fluttershy put breakfast out about ten minutes later and called me in. The smell of cooking food had managed to rouse my son from his slumber thankfully, so I didn't have to shake him awake. I could only be thankful that Fluttershy didn't make a point of prodding me about exactly what had happened the previous night when I went out.

I could see the concern in her eyes whenever I looked in her direction. I can't measure up to Gadget's ability to read body language, but I'm at least good enough to survive being right in the middle of a country-spanning criminal organization. I'm pretty sure I can read ponies well enough to know when a cute pegasus is worried about me, even if I'm not used to someone being concerned with my well-being. Well I mean, aside from Celestia-you know what? You know what I mean!

When breakfast was over, I retired to the couch yet again while Fluttershy went to her usual tasks for the day. I offered to help, but she rather firmly insisted that I needed to lay down and recover from being so out of it. Thus, for the rest of the morning, I laid myself out on the couch and let Spike use me as a big fuzzy cushion for him to laze on while he watched cartoons. The last thing I saw on the TV was Wile E. Coyote getting a healthy dose of slapstick karma before I passed out again, Spike laughing up a storm on top of my barrel. He always loved those cartoons.

Don't know why he just doesn't go get himself a meal at a restaurant, with all those billions of bits he must have stashed away somewhere.

I recall dozing off several times. At some point, I woke up to Spike playing with some of the mice, poking them on their noses and giving them tiny, careful scritches. They responded by swarming him and covering him in mousey fuzz. He never stood a chance.

It was mere chance that I woke up just after noon, and I decided that it was time to get going, regardless of how I felt. I could sleep some more when I got home, I figured. I could tell from the looks Fluttershy was giving me that she didn't really want me to go, but what I couldn't tell her was that I had business to attend to. Sadly, I couldn't hang around trying to break my record of six times in a row with her. Shame, I know.

The last thing I got from her was a hug in her bedroom as I was packing my things back into mine and Spike's suitcases. It made me feel at least a little better despite my predicament at the time. Unfortunately she still had things to take care of around her cottage with her animals since I didn't help her out, so Spike and I had to walk back to town on our own. It did at least give me time to reflect on my stay.

Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy were both the easiest to get along with. Rainbow Dash herself was a more pure-hearted mare after my own heart, posturing and utterly confident in her capabilities and then some. She was easy for me to get along with, and if she lived in Canterlot, she'd probably be the kind of pony I could get along with in my free time. I'm just making a guess at that since I never really had friends like that back in the day, but the point remains.

Fluttershy, meanwhile...well, what do I really need to explain? She's just plain adorable, and intoxicating to be around. The sex is nice, but there's something relaxing about her presence, too. I'm not gonna say that I loved her like that or anything, but...well I mean, c'mon. You start having sex with someone, your feelings towards them are going to change, especially with someone as eager as her. Whether that change is romantic in nature or just a more intense kind of friendship, who's to say?

When it came to Rarity, however...ugh. I really wasn't sure what to make of her. I suppose she did at least try to understand, but I think her attempt didn't get past the reading stage. She knew me already, how could she ever believe what that book told her about ponies of my particular disposition? I couldn't comprehend it, and I didn't think I ever would for that matter. I decided not to think about it, and deal with it next time I visited.

Pinkie was an enigma. I had absolutely no idea what to do about her. The mystery of the way her mind worked was dangerous for me to investigate, not just for my own safety but for hers as well, to say nothing of the secrets I needed to keep from her and everyone she knows. I'd need to be careful down the line, if I ever dared to venture into the anomaly that was her mind. Other than that though, she was...well, she was nice, I guess? Honestly she and I didn't get a whole lot of time together, on account of that whole food poisoning thing.

Speaking of food poisoning, there was Applejack...the most stubborn pony I'd ever met. I mean okay, maybe I'm exaggerating, but most ponies I've ever met at least know when to stop and, y'know, find another way to get their tasks done. There's a limit to pride that one should be self-aware enough to understand, but Applejack had gone well beyond that limit, and I don't think she fully understood just how many her stubbornness had caused trouble for. Maybe my actions gave her a nice wake-up call.

That being said, I really did still feel bad about what I'd said when she was kicking me off her farm. Not just for her, but for Big Macintosh and Granny Smith as well. I was quite sure that despite them seeming to understand my outrage, that threat cut deep. I was threatening their livelihood, threatening something that had been a part of their branch of their family for generations. Even if my threat was empty...that was malicious of me. I need to have better self-control than that.

Wouldn't you know it, too? There was Applejack, waiting for me at the train platform, hat tipped forward over her face. She looked nervous and ashamed, with the way her ears twitched and her head hung lower than normal.

I turned my head to look back at Spike. "Honey, could you go and sit on one of the benches? I need to have a talk with Applejack. Adult stuff."

"Okay," he mumbled, climbing down off my back, using the saddlebags as a foothold. "Can I have my comics?"

I nodded and used my magic to pull open the saddlebag on my left, pulling three of his comics out and floating them over to him. "Here ya go! Just wait for me over there."

I watched him walk off, and turned my attention back to Applejack, standing out as she usually did with her stetson. She must've heard me talking to Spike, because I could see her looking in my direction, her forehoof tapping at the wood underhoof. I could already tell she really didn't want to talk to me, but if I were a betting mare, I would've guessed her grandmother sent her to track me down. How she knew I would be at the station was beyond me.

"Hey," she said slowly, pushing her hat up to sit properly on her head. "Been lookin' for ya."

"All day? You should've just checked at Fluttershy's house," I said, quirking a brow at her. "You knew I was staying there."

"Yeah, well..." she mumbled, looking away. "Maybe wasn't...lookin' as hard as I should've."

"Uh-huh. So why were you looking for me?" I asked, motioning to one of my eyes with a hoof. "Come to give me a parting gift? How did you even know I was leaving today?"

"Wh-no! Ah wouldn't...look," she said, holding a hoof up. "I took mah sweet time gettin' over to Fluttershy's, but when I got there, she said ya already left for the train station, so I had ta book it over here to say I'm sorry! A'right?"

I stared at her in silence for a moment. "You're apologizing?"

She gave me a funny look. "Well yeah, why wouldn't I? What, you think ah ain't the apologizin' type?"

"No, nothing like that!" I said, quickly shaking my head. "Just didn't really expect it. I mean, after what I said...."

"Yeah...about that," she said, her body visibly tensing. "Granny was pretty sure you didn't mean it. Was she right?"

"Of course she was," I said, my ears flattening against my head. "Doesn't change the fact that I said it."

She stared at me for a time, our silence contrasted only by the scant conversations going on around us. There weren't a lot of people at the station. I looked up at her and she was still staring at me, all accusing and shit. I felt real self-conscious the longer the silence between us lasted.

"Sorry," I said quickly, clearing my throat. "I'm...I'm really sorry I said what I said. I didn't mean it."

"S'alright, ah guess..." she muttered, looking around the platform for a moment before looking back at me. "How 'bout we try this again?"

I blinked. "What?"

"Ah-hem! Howdy! Name's Applejack," she said, holding a forehoof out to me. "I run Sweet Apple Acres, and recently I really messed up bein' way too stubborn for muh own good and wound up hurtin' lots of ponies in the process. Ah might've also been forced ta do community service, so I can't even use all that free time a good friend of mine managed to get for me, despite me bein' all pig-headed about it."

I stared at her hoof for a moment, then took it into my own. "Name's Twilight Sparkle. I'm arrogant, occasionally short-tempered and the scheming type. I threatened a friend's livelihood in a moment of anger and felt like garbage after I'd cooled my head. Hopefully, she can forgive me for that."

"Ah'm sure she can," she said, shaking my hoof a lot less vigorously than she'd done when we first met. "She's pretty easy-goin' like that."

"Pff! Could've fooled me," I responded, returning the hoofshake. "That was a lot easier than I expected."

"Ain't worth draggin' it out and holdin' grudges."

Next thing I knew, Applejack was pulling me in for a hug, and I had no chance of resisting with how it took me by surprise. Even if I'd expected it, all a strong pony like Applejack needed was a good grip on me. What was with these ponies and invading my personal space? I thought Pinkie was the only one I had to worry about on that front!

The embrace was only mostly one-sided. My hug in comparison to hers wasn't anything special, but that might've been because I was marveling at just how inadequate it made me feel. Not because I was a horrible pony, but because I could feel every muscle in her foreleg flexing with enough power to snap me like a twig. They were corded and bulging and wow she would've broken me if Big Mac hadn't stopped her.

It was kinda hot too. Not gonna lie.

While she had her foreleg around my neck, I just kinda...I dunno, had mine resting kinda on her wither, gently patting just behind the base of her neck. I mean, I got the gesture for what it was, but it was a bit awkward. I wasn't really used to just up and getting them, least of all from a pony like Applejack. Fluttershy did not and still doesn't count, we were doing far more intimate things together than just hugging!

Of course, it wasn't meant to last, despite Applejack holding me for much longer than I would've normally felt comfortable with. Damn Ponyville mares makin' me soft. She let me go a few seconds past socially acceptable and took off, saying something about needing to be somewhere. I think it was another farm she had to do work for or something.

The moment the train arrived, Spike and I were aboard as soon as we possibly could be. Credit where credit's due, Ponyville can be a relaxing place. I just didn't allow it to be, mostly because I was just so intent on being my kind, helpful self. I hope you can taste that sarcasm. S'like bile in my mouth, you think it tastes bad to you, you don't even know....

As the train began to move, I resolved to sit on my ass and do absolutely nothing next time. Like many other resolutions, I likely wouldn't stay true to it, but what can you do? At least Spike was content to stay quiet and read his comics. My muzzle was bothering me as well, which prompted me using one of my painkillers. The relaxing, light-headed sensation it afforded me made the train ride go by very quickly, probably because at some point I just closed my eyes, leaned against the wall, and let the tension in my muscles fade away as much as I could. It was just a shame that that relaxation didn't last long. Towards the end of the trip, I couldn't get that incident in New Yoke out of my head.

New Yoke was quite a city, on par with Manehattan, but known more for being a center of commerce than anything else. Big businesses paid out the ass to advertise on massive billboards, in the new subways and train stations, that sort of stuff. It was also one of the few cities the Mafia didn't have in their iron grip. Not completely anyways.

The gangs of New Yoke were a wily and diverse bunch, scattered and small in size, but numerous in number. Racism and blood-feuds spurred all of them into action, though some were formed just to protect their neighborhoods, and not always with any degree of success. These days though, even those gangs have evolved into something that no normal person could ever respect. Or would that be devolved? They went to shit, there we go.

While I would've preferred to leave it to Shady, I had no solid idea of where he was at the moment, or what he was up to. I needed to keep my hooves out of any possible messes we could wind up in, but investigation was my realm of expertise. It kind of had to be, considering my history. I can hold my own just fine, but I'll always prefer not having to fight fair in the first place by outmaneuvering my targets.

Stalliongrad doesn't count. Ruby Red had an unfair advantage on me.

Aside from all of that, I needed the practice. If Stalliongrad was any indication, I was rusty just from being out of the game for a few years. I needed to get back in there and get myself straightened out...and maybe investigating a curiosity on top of getting in with some of the local gangs could help. It certainly wouldn't hurt, and it'd put my mind at ease.

Those murders were abnormal, not only in their scope, but their MO as well. The method of killing was a mystery to me, though that was due to a lack of knowledge of the crime scene. The moving of the bodies would've taken some extremely careful telekinesis or teleportation, but if it was the former someone would've seen them removing the bodies even if they did it all at once, and wounds that size would've left a huge blood trail for the police to follow. The latter possibility would've at least left a magic signature behind they could've traced...but of course, if it had something to do with the Mafia, they could've paid off some of the cops on their bankroll to cover it up.

Then again...there was always the possibility that figuring this out could get me the kind of credibility I'd need with the local gangs to get things moving. It was a better start than my more general idea of intimidating them into cooperating. That would've involved firebombs, shutting down businesses and doing whatever I could to get their attention...you know, if I couldn't get an audience with their leaders first. Not the cleanest idea, but without the veritable network of connections I once had, I had to do things the hard way.

For how disgusting the Mafia was and still is to me, there were perks to being one of them. If I tried making use of those old contacts now, I might tip someone off. Someone might talk, and then that other person will talk, and then other will continue to talk until someone important catches wind of me getting up to something. Next thing I know, I've got ponies at my doorstep kindly asking to come inside so they can ask me a few questions that I wouldn't want to answer.

None of that mattered until my muzzle was back in shape, so I put it out of my mind. As our train pulled into the station, my focus was more heavily centered on the unusually rowdy crowd that had gathered outside, already in the process of bum-rushing the side of the train. I could see cameras, microphones, and a whole lot of curious ponies of the reporter variety gearing up to say hello. Given the fact that there were only three other ponies in the train car aside from Spike and myself, I had the sneaking suspicion that they were there to talk to me.

I say 'talk' in the loosest sense of the word. It's more equivalent to a pack of howler monkeys shouting at you until you say something they can make even more noise about when they get back to the people they work for. You know, things like 'get that stupid fucking camera out of my face' or 'how do you fuckwits not have anything else to do with your lives on a Saturday besides follow me around?' The kinds of things they can edit back at their workplace and deliberately take it out of context and then present it to the public like it's fact.

Did I mention I hate mainstream news sources?

While I had dealt with this kind of thing previously, when Celestia had first accepted me as her student, Spike was another matter entirely. His experiences with the media only ranges from television to a single encounter with a journalist that wanted to know about home life for a young dragon in Equestria among the nobility. You didn't exactly see any dragons among the Canterlot elite, let alone one raised by ponies. I stuck around so he didn't ask any really shady questions, but that aside, that's about all the experience Spike had at the time. What we were about to walk into was a bunch of those journalists, except with zero concern for the wellbeing of the child that would be riding on my back.

I quickly gathered our things and let Spike climb up onto my back. I would've let him walk if this was going to be a more leisurely stroll, but with that big crowd outside, I didn't want to take any chances of getting separated from him. I could see the concern on his face when he took notice of the crowd past the windows, but I couldn't teleport out of there without the possibility of having to fill out a damn form about it, so through the crowd we would wade.

The moment we stepped off the train, the resounding snap and flash of numerous cameras began to go off, which caused Spike to hide behind my neck, if only to spare his eyes the agony of dealing with them. I, however, had no such luxury aside from raising my foreleg. Then there was the shouting and clamoring to get my attention, which was obviously grating on its own, but with the way Spike was gripping at my mane, it was upsetting me in an entirely different way.

I pushed through the crowd while cameras flashed and reporters shouted over each other to try and get my attention. Multiple microphones were shoved in my face, and I recall for a brief moment wondering why it took them that long to start making a fuss. They all wanted to know what I'd gotten up to in Stalliongrad, several accused me of being at fault for what happened in Stalliongrad, and a few of them just wanted to know what I was up to in Ponyville. That second one didn't realize how right he was, and I wasn't going to tip him off.

Then one of them shoved a camera in Spike's face.

I will never apologize for turning and shoving that guy. I don't care if he didn't mean to do it, or if it wasn't meant to be malicious, that's my son he was harassing. A child. He got exactly what he deserved, and he can harp about 'assaulting the press' all he wants. Fuck that guy.

Speaking of shoving ponies, I kinda had to do more of that just to get through them, cameras snapping off around us as we went. I kept a firm hold of our luggage with my magic as we went, my teeth clenched in irritation from the fact that they were actively following me. Spike didn't seem very happy about it either, though maybe he was just clinging to me because he'd never really seen me get aggressive with anyone before. Pushing him around when he was testing his boundaries and giving him a smack when he was very young was one thing, if only because I think he remembers leaving deep bite marks under my fetlocks and he knows it was exactly what he was asking for, but witnessing me shoving another pony to the ground and everyone getting into an uproar about it is a genuinely scary thing for a child to witness, let alone be in the middle of it.

It sure didn't get the guttersnipes off my ass, that was for damn sure.

Unfortunately, reckless teleportation was pretty dangerous as well as a hassle if anyone caught me doing it, so I couldn't do that. Thus, I had to walk at a brisk pace and hope beyond all hope that they'd take the hint. I could hear the cameras still going off behind me, but I think they got the message to keep their distance after I shoved that guy and pushed my way past them. They want to hassle me and try to get an impromptu interview with me? Do it when my son isn't riding on my back, you fucks.

They lost interest as we made our way out of the train station and I paid for a cab. Guess they had better things to do...that or someone dropped them a tip, for some reason or another. I'd been too busy to deal with the nobility or go to any big soirees or parties, so I couldn't even fathom who might want to sic the paparazzi on me. All it takes is a 'reliable tip' from the right person, and suddenly you're the center of attention for a day, for reasons you may or may not understand.

All of that was assuming they were sicced on me. It was entirely possible that they were just slow on the uptake and decided to get an interview with me long after the incident with Nightmare Moon, or even the stuff that went down in Stalliongrad. Real quick on the uptake there, know what I mean?

When we arrived at our new house, I felt the sigh of relief building within myself. Then I remembered that we never actually got around to furnishing it beyond the bare essentials. I'd put in orders for a few beds, some tables and chairs for the living area and the kitchen, you know, the important stuff. Beyond that though, the place was looking pretty sparse. At least it was finished though! Guess that's what happens when a hero hires a full crew to get a place fixed up ASAP.

That being said, I really wasn't feeling up to going out and hunting for a bunch of furniture. I was still kinda out of it from what Chrysalis did to me, and the idea of having to run around haggling with shop owners and getting all that stuff done actually made me want to faceplant on the floor and not move until someone came to collect my body. Anything would've been preferable to running around and taking care of all that bullshit.

Still, I resolved to power through it. If nothing else, I wasn't going to let that uppity bitch win by keeping me down. I don't know what kind of victory I thought I was going for, but looking back on it, I'm pretty sure it was a pyrrhic one. Maybe. Am I remembering the definition of that correctly? All I know is I felt like shit by the end of the day, but that parasite didn't win either.

Maybe I should go grab a dictionary....

Okay, whatever. Anyway, after dropping our stuff off, I spent the vast majority of that day walking around with Spike, looking for decent furniture without having to buy anything opulent. Problem with that is, opulent is kind of the style of Canterlot. Good luck finding anything that doesn't at least have some kind of faux-gold trim or filigree, or silver if you're some kind of cheapo. Of course, that's only an issue if you stay in the kinds of areas I stuck to with Spike on my back. While I would've preferred more 'basic' furniture, unfortunately as a noble I had to keep up certain appearances. Thus, I needed to get the fancy shit in case of visitors.

Dinner tables, cushy and opulently-designed chairs, cabinets, dressers, ugh! So much crap to buy, and it wasn't cheap! Well I mean, not cheap when it comes to furniture in general. A normal pony would buy some chairs of decent quality for their dinner table, maybe a set of four, for maybe two-hundred bits total, or somewhere in that ballpark. I was paying two-hundred per chair. That should put into perspective the quality of furniture I was forking out the cash to buy.

To say that I hate shopping is an understatement. You have all these mares walking around like 'oh gosh, look at this dress, I gotta have it, and I need to pick up some toothpaste and maybe look at some other stuff' and they'll make a whole day out of it. Me, I make a list of what I want, I go out, I get what I wanted and/or needed, and then I go home. Going out shopping without a plan absolutely drove me up a wall. Guess that's what I get for forgetting to plan to furnish the damn house or hiring someone to do it for me.

It was only about halfway through the day that I remembered that Gadget was supposed to be renting a room from me. That presented a problem, but nothing that couldn't be solved by a quick visit to the castle. As it stood, she was probably still in basic training, or boot camp, or whatever you want to call it. That meant she was still shacked up in the barracks for the time being. I made a point of picking up a catalog from the store I was in at that moment, already planning to go and pay her a visit, if I was allowed.

Unfortunately, if I wanted to pay a visit to Gadget, or at least attempt to, that would mean I'd have to spend some time in Day Court. It was impossible to get into the castle without being seen, and someone of my stature among the nobility would be expected to make an appearance if we wound up at the castle. Since I didn't have a foalsitter on-hoof either, that would mean I'd have to bring Spike along. I wasn't looking forward to such a prospect.

It was late when we arrived, having spent the majority of the day out and about. The sun was beginning to set, and it would only be a matter of time until Luna would have to put the moon up into the sky. It felt weird, not immediately thinking of Celestia when it came to that, but apparently that was one thing I was quick to adapt to.

With Spike laying comfortably on my back, I marched confidently into what remained of the Day Court. Some days, Day Court was a series of scheduled meetings between members of the public and Princess Celestia. Other days, like today apparently, were days where the nobility could gather with the civil servants of Equestria and have more casual conversations to air less pressing issues and grievances. Because this is the nobility we're talking about however, these days usually devolved into lots of brown-nosing, making deals on the side, and political and social maneuvering around each other to try and get a leg up on any and all competition.

I knew how to play their game, really I did. I just often chose not to. I'd wade in in order to get some information or check in on what's going on with the different families just to keep myself present in the minds of the nobility that were higher up on the ladder, but for the most part, my presence was usually only because Celestia was there. What kind of 'faithful student' would I be if I never showed up for her Day Court?

Making my way through the crowd proved to take longer than I would've liked. Numerous ponies stopped me so they could converse with me, always trying to get closer to the Princess's prized pupil in hopes that it would give them some kind of edge. It was practically a game to them. Unfortunately, I saw the one pony I didn't want to see, and hoped wouldn't be there since it was so late.

There was Blueblood, coming right at me, with a mare at each side. Fuck my life.

Author's Note

OH MAN THIS IS LATE

Oh well shit happens. Also For Honor. And getting an Xbox One on the cheap and picking up a LOT of old games I never got to play that I can finally play now.

(oh god breath of the wild comes out on the third)

Seriously though, sorry about that guys. I'll try to get myself back on schedule, but I can't make any promises. I've kinda grown up predisposed to gaming over just about anything else. By the way, my birthday was on the 26th, and I'd planned to have this out that day, buuuut things didn't quite line up!

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Chapter 35 - Parasites

Chapter 35 - Parasites

written by Fire Soul

There were many ways I could describe Blueblood. A stain on the coat of Equestria. The bile you taste in your throat after a night of alcoholic over-indulgence. Herpes on my balls. Many, many ways to describe him, yes indeed.

But hey, maybe that's just my personal bias.

In truth, if I had to describe Blueblood in a more reasonable choice of words, I'd go with 'selfishly altruistic', as much of a contradiction as that sounds like. The constant flirtation and landing of high-class mares in his bed aside, he often went to numerous get-togethers, schmoozing with the nobility, gathering information, and things of that sort. He donated his money to charities and invested it in good-will organizations, and from the surface, that seems like it makes him a really good pony, even if his personality is haughty and extremely annoying.

When you're someone like me though, you tend to look past the surface, to an almost obsessive degree. I'm an inquisitive sort, what can I say? What the average pony doesn't see is the loopholes that Blueblood exploits when he donates to these charities, and the under-the-table deals he makes to ensure that he makes a whole lot more money than he gives away to them. He's a very pretty face with a fairly clean reputation with the masses. It's easy for him to fool them all.

On top of that, I know for a fact that he's not the type to just give money without taking into consideration how much it can benefit him. That concern you hear on the radio, when he's being interviewed about things like world hunger? That tear-jerking waver in his voice as he struggles so very hard to get the words out? Yeah, you can practice that kind of thing. In a mirror. Take acting classes, that kind of stuff. Kinda necessary for someone like him. Gotta make sure they look good for the public!

Of course, a pansy-ass bitch like him can fake tears really well, so it's no surprise he has so many people thinking he's an exemplary individual.

"Ah, Twilight Sparkle! So good to see you again. You look as ravishing as ever," he said to me in that familiar, grating and exaggerated vocal flourish of his that I hated oh-so-much. "Despite Stalliongrad's attempts to make you otherwise."

I caught the motion of his hoof just on the edge of my sight, and I raised my right foreleg in response, offering it to him. It made my skin crawl to do it, but certain expectations had to be met among the nobility. Even as Celestia's student, I wasn't above having to bow my head and properly respond to his social cues. Thus, I had to suffer the sensation of him taking my hoof in his and lifting it up to place a kiss upon it. An empty, expected gesture of respect that I knew was as calculated as it was false.

Many eyes were watching, and the general consensus was that the nobles liked seeing those close to and among the royal family getting along. It sent the message 'everything is fine, nothing is wrong'. Nobles liked it when they could believe that nothing was wrong. That meant they could stay rich and could continue being disconnected from the realities of the common ponies for another day.

I had to fight against my own sneer to maintain a calm, dignified smile as he set my hoof down. "Blueblood! So wonderful to see you again. I see you're keeping fine company, as usual. Only two this time?"

He followed my gaze as I glanced to his two companions, and his chest swelled with pride. "Yes, well, my mares were disloyal, so I decided I needed quality over quantity."

Ugh, he looked like a peacock, standing all tall and proud of himself, chest swelled up and everything. All he needed to do was flag his tail and caw at me and the image would've been complete. Maybe throw in crossed eyes, that really sells it.

"Really? Why, who would ever be disloyal to you?" I asked in a far sweeter tone than I intended. "You're such a charmer. It boggles the mind!"

I could see his smile fade an almost imperceptible amount, and I felt a small delight in it. He knew I didn't like him, but that never stopped him from engaging me. It was expected of both of us, as I said before.

He rallied his smile once more, though his chest had deflated. "I do my absolute best, but sometimes ponies don't know what they have. No respect for royalty."

"Speaking of respect for royalty," I said quickly, stepping to his right. "I came here to speak with Princess Celestia."

"You know, you should join us, Twilight," he said slowly, turning to face me once again. "Both our houses would benefit greatly from our union. It can't possibly be any worse than the company you've been rumored to keep at that noisy club in the red district."

I sighed and faked a smile, eyes drifting shut while I shook my head. "Oh, Blueblood, you keep trying! We both know it would never work. Well, that's not true. It seems like I'm the only one that understands that."

"Yet you've never explained why," he shot back, the faintest hint of a smug smile deforming the mask of a smile he worked so hard to put on every day. "Unless commoners are your type, I don't see how I couldn't measure up."

"Do remember that those are merely rumors, Blueblood." I said quickly, glancing back at Spike, who looked curious, but confused, by our conversation.

Blueblood didn't seem to take the hint. "If you married me, those rumors would disappear. Despite what many may think, commoners can be conniving snakes just as much as they say we nobles are."

"Oh-ho, Blueblood~!" I gushed, sprinkling just the right amount of laughter into my voice. "You say that, but the main reason I spend my time among the so-called commoners is because they don't feel the need to hide their scales! Probably because they can't afford all of those fancy soaps like you use."

Before he could even sneer at me, Spike spoke up. "What's wrong with scales?"

I smiled and glanced back at him. "Nothing at all, dear! Just grown-ups being silly. Right, Blueblood?"

He at least had the decency to notice the look I was giving him. That stern glare of a mother that was just daring someone to say some shit that would devastate her child's innocence. It probably also helped that he was starting to notice the crowd developing around us, on top of the fact that many, many eyes were on us, including Celestia's. I could see her approaching in the distance, most likely to see what the trouble was, or to at least see if there was any trouble at all.

He cleared his throat and put that smile back on, nodding to Spike. "Yes, of course! Nothing wrong at all, we're just being...silly."

I faked a shudder and shook my head. "I'm no fan of snakes, but it's mostly the poisonous ones I can't stand to be around. Makes sense, right Blueblood?"

It was a little difficult to make out, but I could see the muscles in his jaw clenching, yet the smile never faded. "Yes. Quite."

It was a really good impression of Celestia's mask, all things considered. He wasn't anywhere near as good at it as she was though. She stopped her involuntary emoting at the brain stem, so to speak.

I could only be thankful that he wasn't quick enough to say something before Celestia showed up behind him and to his left, in all her regal glory. The less I had to talk with him, the better off things were for everyone, really. I can only keep that facade up for so long before things start to get heated between us, and not in the good way. I can say plenty of bad things about him, but if he ever got smart enough to actually utilize his ability to get under my skin, I'd probably be in prison for beating him to a pulp within the week.

"It would seem you're both getting along for once," Celestia said to us, demanding our attention in the process. "A novel concept compared to previous interactions."

I smoothly maneuvered around Blueblood and bowed in front of Celestia, which caused Spike to slide forward and straddle my withers. "A pleasure to see you again, princess."

Spike took the opportunity to climb off of my back while Blueblood and his mares (see: floozies in their unnatural habitat) turned to bow as well. I took the opportunity to glance over at Spike, and he seemed lost with how he was looking at us, then up at Celestia, then back at us. I didn't bring him to court very often, and it was rare that he was around when this sort of formality was necessary, and I'd never really given him any instruction on what he was supposed to do in this sort of situation.

He had it covered though. He just waved to Celestia instead.

"Hi princess!" he said without a care in the world, despite the many ponies around that I could see staring at him in disbelief.

Celestia, of course, found it amusing. I could hear the faint laughter she was hiding behind a hoof, and a quick look around the room made it clear that the vast majority of people at court that day were a bunch of hoof-lickers, with how they began to chuckle and go along with what their precious princess was feeling. At the very least, I could take comfort in the fact that a select few of them were genuine, but it was just another sign of how important it is to fit into their world view. Not everyone has the standing and social presence to sway an entire crowd's thinking like Princess Celestia does.

Celestia lowered her head and approached us, gently resting her hoof atop Spike's head. "Good to see you too, Spike. What brings you here today?"

I stood up quickly and looked down at Spike. "We just spent most of the day shopping, and I figured we should stop in and say hello."

"Personally, I would recommend rest," Blueblood suddenly chimed in next to me, standing up as well. "How else will your muzzle get better?"

"I assure you Blueblood, I'm more than capable of taking care of myself." I quickly shot back, staring at him without turning my head.

He hmph'ed and stuck his nose in the air. "If that were true, you wouldn't have come to harm to begin with! If you were my wife, you'd want for nothing and you wouldn't have to associate with the ruffians that hurt you!"

"You say something like that, when your dates are right next to you?" I asked, pointing between the two mares on either side of him. "Isn't that just a little tacky? I apologize for his behavior ladies, he's always like this."

He scoffed and waved off my mockery. "I am a prince, Twilight Sparkle! It is an honor to be courted by me. Your constant rebuttals are tolerated only because I-!"

"That is enough!" Celestia stated firmly, looking between us. "Honestly, it's always the same with you two...."

I bowed my head faintly. "My apologies, princess."

"I as well, auntie," Blueblood said, doing his best to actually sound remorseful. "I am ashamed of my behavior."

Celestia nodded to us both while Spike slipped out from under her hoof and moved to stand next to me. "It's fine. Perhaps your flirtations should be taken elsewhere? A crowd is no place to court a mare, nephew."

"Perhaps," he said, turning to me and bowing his head. "I will show greater discretion in the future. Maybe tomorrow, over lunch?"

I sucked in air through my teeth while glaring him down. "You never give up."

"Of course not! What kind of stallion would I be if I gave up?" he asked, though I was fully aware how rhetorical the question was. "Now, I have some fine, respectable young ladies to entertain. It was a pleasure as always, Lady Sparkle!"

I watched him leave with no small amount of disgust. It was always like this with him, a confrontation of him being a flirtatious bastard that couldn't take a hint, and me having to look bad by being a brick wall made entirely of the word 'no'. The fact that he made a habit of doing it in public only made it worse for me.

As a prince, there are certain allowances made for him due to his status. Anyone that wants to climb the ladder quick sees him and realizes there's a nice, convenient elevator right next to the ladder. All they have to do is press the right buttons to get where they want to go. Unfortunately, that has fostered a mentality in Blueblood that has led to him being insufferably insistent.

Very few ponies are willing to say no to royalty. Very few people can afford to say no to royalty, to be more specific. The only reason I can get away with it is because of my position as Celestia's student, and now, also because I've gone on record as saving the world. All of that will never change the established mentality of the nobility however.

See, Blueblood tends to get what he wants. As long as he's consistent and doesn't give up, he tends to succeed without fail. I don't need mental magic to know that in the minds of many of the nobility, my resistance towards his 'affections' are cute and quaint. As far as they're concerned, my eventual marriage to Blueblood is a foregone conclusion, even if he has to pay my parents to set things up. It was very likely that his courtship of me was little more than a game to him.

Whether or not that marriage would last has absolutely nothing to do with it. It's not exactly a secret that he has a new mare or two hanging on him every week, some of them repeats, some of them not. The idea of him actually getting married and not being caught banging several mares on the side was and still is inconceivable. Probably a few married mares while he's at it.

All of that, and I haven't even mentioned his Mafia connections!

Celestia's sigh couldn't have communicated more disappointment if it tried. "With that, court is adjourned for the day, my little ponies! I look forward to seeing you all again soon!"

With numerous goodbyes going on around me, I waited for ponies to begin to leave, standing steadfast at Celestia's side while letting Spike climb up onto my back once again. With so many hooves clomping around us, I would rather Spike not be on the floor anyway. Too many opportunities for his tail to get stepped on, or trampled outright.

When the throne room was empty, and it was just us and the usual number of guards, I turned to Celestia with a frown. "Have I ever mentioned how much I despise your nephew?"

A stifled snort sounded off from the far corner of the room, definitely one of the guards. Probably one that I knew and sparred with on occasion. I didn't exactly make my dislike of Blueblood confidential knowledge, and many of them could share that sentiment, even the ones that were on the take. Even if he was above all of them, they knew an asshole when they saw one.

Celestia smiled good-naturedly and shook her head. "No, never."

"I despise him," I said quickly, hmph'ing and sticking my nose into the air. "He's like a bad smell in your fridge. You clear out the questionable things and scrub it down, but two days later, there it is again. Offending your very senses."

Celestia merely rolled her eyes at me. "You come up with such colorful ways to over-exaggerate, Twilight."

I quirked a brow at her. "Am I really overexaggerating?"

"No!" she said sharply, her mask-smile fading for only a brief instant, little more than a small twitch in the corner of her muzzle. "But he is my nephew Twilight. It's rude to speak of him in such a way in front of me."

"Then permit us to state thusly: thine nephew is rotten tripe on finely-clothed legs."

I blinked only once before old instincts kicked in. I ducked low and lit my horn, a spell already in mind when I looked up towards the ceiling. The fact the voice came from above could only mean it was a pegasus, and a pegasus descending from the ceiling in the throne room could only have ill intent. It was rude to fly around for any reason. Judging by the way the guards were reacting around me, I wasn't wrong about that.

Celestia's non-reaction, however, gave me reason to doubt that this was actually a threat. Aside from a disapproving scowl, she didn't seem all that surprised. When a familiar figure landed next to her, all of the guards just as quickly resumed their positions and uttered an apology before returning to the stalwart living statues they often were in the castle.

"He's your nephew as well, Luna," Celestia stated calmly. "You should stand by his side, and be a good example for him."

Luna looked up at her sister incredulously, then laughed. "How old is he, dear sister? We should not have to set an example for a grown stallion! His attitude remindeth us of our own time, when stallions would steal away the objects of their affections and force marriages in secret. Thou knowest our disgust for such things."

"That sort of thing doesn't happen anymore, sister," Celestia said soothingly, motioning to me. "As you can see, my student is still happily single and lacking a wedding dress."

"Fie to thee!" Luna barked, swatting her hoof through the air as if she were batting away a fly. "Were this our court, thy nephew would have been gelded-"

"Luna!"

The sudden shout from Celestia caused Spike to duck his head behind mine. He'd crawled forward to lean against the back of my head and neck to get a better view of what was going on, but now I guess I was his shield. Celestia didn't lack for intimidation once she got upset.

Luna, however, didn't miss a beat. She fell silent and looked in my direction, and at least had the decency to appear ashamed. She stepped forward and slowly bowed in front of me.

"We fear we hath behaved in a manner unbecoming of our station," she said, closing her eyes. "Pray, forgive us for putting on such a display in front of thee and thine child."

I shrugged it off, only one thought on my mind. "As long as he doesn't-"

"What does gelded mean?" Spike chimed behind me.

I could only rub my hoof over my forehead so hard, you know. The animalistic growl was entirely unintentional. My temptation to snap Luna's pretty little neck because she could survive it was entirely justified in that moment.

At least Luna was quick to try to fix her mistake. "'Tis a subject young children should not concern themselves with, little one. It is a bad thing, and we would hope thy exploration of such a thing would remain purely academic in the future."

He stared at her for far longer than was necessary before finally looking to me again. "What?"

"You'll find out when you're older, hun."

"Oh. Okay!"

I knew Spike wanted to ask more questions. He always did. It was that inquisitiveness that made him such a good student all on his own. A personal desire to learn more about anything that piqued his interest was more than most parents could ask for in a child...and usually it was something stomped out of the ones that went to public schools. I could only be thankful he'd learned to keep it under control.

With Spike no longer asking questions, I could answer Luna properly. "So what kind of punishment would be appropriate for a princess talking about inappropriate things in front of children?"

To Luna's credit, she actually didn't seem like her mind ventured into dirty territory...despite being forced into celibacy for a thousand years. "Once, self-flagellation was an acceptable form of repentance, though we have been informed that such things are seen as barbaric in this day and age."

"Yyyeah, no," I responded quickly, shaking my head. "Rather not be responsible for a princess looking all torn-wait, wounds don't last on you."

"Drat," Luna grumbled, lowering her head. "Thou wouldst be surprised how often such things worked in our day. Once, the implication of self-harm was enough to convince all of our dedication."

I hissed in a breath through my clenched teeth. "These days, self-harm is only associated with suicide. Ponies see it as a cry for help...which isn't necessarily wrong."

Things got quiet from there. Also awkward. Veeery awkward. Thankfully, we had a resident tension-resolver in our midst, so I could only be happy when I felt feathers suddenly curling down over one side of me.

"Well! I believe we can put such talks behind us, wouldn't you both agree?" Celestia asked, glancing between us. "Not the most pleasant topic of conversation."

"Yes! Of course," I said quickly, eager to sidestep the massive obstacle that was that conversational dead end. "How about tea? I could tell you about my time in Ponyville, if you like."

"That sounds wonderful! I'm sure my sister would like to join us as well," she said, looking in Luna's direction. "Am I right, Luna?"

To Luna's credit, she did a good enough job of hiding her apprehension. While she'd held the conversation well enough before, something about the way the silence was lingering between them struck me as odd. I was missing something, and the way Luna kept looking back and forth between Celestia and myself only served to make me suspicious.

The silent conversation between them ended almost as suddenly as it began, Luna's smile appearing just a little too quick to be believable. The corners of her muzzle seemed just beyond the kind of smile you'd immediately think of as 'acceptable and real'. Kind of like someone that forces a smile, and the corners of their eyes don't curl up. They're pretending, but it'd cause a problem if you said anything.

"Verily, we would enjoy joining in thy merriment!" Luna stated suddenly. "We have little else to do during the day."

"Wonderful!" Celestia said with a merry smile, leading the way out of the throne room and into one of the adjacent halls. "I believe it's long past time I introduced the two of you under less troublesome circumstances."

Our trip through the castle wasn't punctuated by much, outside of Spike regaling Celestia with his own recollection of what happened during our visit to Ponyville. I was content to let him chatter, considering I didn't have much to say at the moment myself. I was more focused on Luna.

See, the miniature princess wasn't being very talkative either, which I guess wasn't all that surprising. Being so out of touch with modern Equestria, I wouldn't expect her to have anything interesting to talk about. It was the way I kept feeling her eyes on me that repeatedly drew my attention. I wanted to say something about it, but I didn't want to make things weird while we were walking down the halls.

I breathed a sigh of relief when we reached the room that Celestia had in mind. If nothing else, I could at least say she was consistent in her choice of rooms. The usual fine decor, the same kind of semi-large round table complete with comfy, expensive cushions. Maybe one day I'd wind up in one of those rooms, but there'd be a painting of Celestia's ass on the wall or something, just to break up the tedium.

Oh sweet her, that'd be a fun prank to pull.

It didn't take long for the usual rigamarole of ordering tea and getting situated to take place. The cushions were plenty comfy and Celestia took the time to pour tea for all four of us, but there was a tension in the air I wasn't sure how to handle. On top of that, Luna chose to take the seat furthest from me, on the complete opposite side of the table, with Celestia seated next to her. It left me constantly facing her, yet still she did her best to avert her gaze whenever I tried to make eye contact with her.

I really couldn't get a read on her no matter how much I tried. Even as Celestia, Spike and I conversed about our stay in Ponyville, Luna was oddly silent and withdrawn...just like in the halls. It didn't make a lot of sense to me why she even bothered to join us if she didn't actually want to talk. Then again, how could I understand the inner workings of someone that only recently got back from a thousand-year isolation?

"Spike, I'm going to check in with my advisors, and you seem bored," Celestia suddenly said, finishing off her cup of tea. "Would you care to join me?"

"Okay!"

I took note of how Luna's eyes widened, the small alicorn watching her sister get up and leave with Spike on her back. I could tell almost immediately that she wanted to say something, likely in protest since it would leave us alone together, but the moment she opened her mouth to speak, we locked eyes. Instantly, her protests ceased, and I swear she managed to almost duck behind her side of the table with how she shrunk in on herself.

It was only once Celestia and Spike were out of the room that I bothered to show any sign of disapproval. "I know it's been a thousand years and you're probably ecstatic to be free, but in my experience, most ponies wouldn't react favorably if you were so blatant with how much you don't want to be alone with them."

To her credit, she didn't respond with an immediate rebuttal. There was something more along the lines of visible, base, animal panic in her eyes that made me lean back out of reflex. I had only ever seen those eyes in victims that knew what was comin' to 'em when I showed up in their house unannounced, right after putting a hole in the forehead of the ponies they hired to protect them. That was the kind of look you brace for, because a cornered animal is very likely to pounce out of desperation.

Fortunately, it didn't come to that. Her panic receded just as quickly as it came, and she was left trying to come up with something to say. It gave me an opportunity to take in how strange it was to be looking at an alicorn the same size as me. I was used to having a slight stiffness in my neck from looking up at Celestia so much. It was almost surreal.

She managed to catch herself long enough to formulate a proper response. "We did not say that we are afraid to be in thy presence! Alone!"

"I didn't say that either," I responded calmly. "I said you don't want to be alone with me."

Her face scrunched up as if she'd bitten into a lemon. "We...suppose that thou art correct...."

I looked down to my almost-empty teacup and pushed it aside. "So, why exactly are you afraid of me, princess?"

The look she gave me was nothing short of steely determination. "We are not afraid of thee."

"Yeah, and manticores don't shit in the Everfree," I muttered, looking down to her half-empty teacup. "I'm guessing you're not a fan? Er, of the tea I mean, not me."

She gazed down at her teacup, her frustration from my verbal prodding more than obvious. "Yes. We prefer the bitterness of this drink our ponies refer to as coffee."

"A little early in your return after a thousand years to be calling us 'your ponies', don't you think?" I offered, daring to grin at her.

Now I was getting under her skin. Despite her smaller stature, I got this feeling in the back of my mind that I was an ant nipping at the tender pawpads of a tiger, and it had finally taken proper notice of me. Time would tell if she dealt with me the same way a tiger actually would.

"Perhaps...though we would argue that thine barbed tongue should be cut out for such an insult," she said, pushing her tea aside firmly enough to make it splash over the rim of the cup and spill into the saucer it was sitting on. "Regardless of thine status as our sister's favored student, we are a Princess of Equestria. Thou shall show us respect!"

"Respect is earned, princess," I responded as calmly as ever. "This isn't a thousand years ago, and I'm intimately familiar with the reason why you haven't been around. These days, a pony with the guts to say it would call you a domestic terrorist, and they would reason that you're not currently chained up in a dungeon because of nepotism."

The tension in the room was palpable to me, and it was all coming from her. From the way she was glaring at me, I genuinely thought she was going to explode at any moment.

Her anger left as quickly as it came. "Thy tone and sharp words must be directed at us for a reason. Would thou tell us that reason?"

It was something that had been in the back of my mind ever since the girls and I dealt with Nightmare Moon. Princess Luna, the newly-reformed Mistress of the Night, returned to a position of power with very little fanfare, an entire town celebrating her return...but I'd heard nothing about her since then. No rumors, no newspaper articles, not even any news stations on television so much as mentioning her name. With such a huge event taking place, how could Luna not be on the minds and lips of every pony in Equestria?

It told me other equally concerning things as well.

"Then I'll get right down to it. I haven't heard a single thing about you since your return," I started, folding my forelegs on the edge of the table and leaning my weight against it. "So either you don't know what you're doing, or you're being a lazy coward, and unlike Celestia, I'm not going to sit here and act like I'm okay with either possibility."

"What dost thou mean by that?"

"What, you don't get it? Let me lay it out for you," I said, idly making a sweeping motion in front of myself with a foreleg. "Celestia is a beloved ruler. You returned and were given back your title of princess simply because Celestia said you were redeemed. No one questioned it at all, at least, not openly. It's only a matter of time before her detractors, foreign and domestic, start using you to tarnish her reputation, for all the good it'll do them."

She took a breath and nodded to me. "Make no mistake, Lady Sparkle. We hath considered a great many things and discussed far more with our sister."

"Then what do you plan to do about it?"

Her ears folded back and she looked over towards the balcony doors. "We...do not know. T'would be expected of us to get involved with Equestria's politics, but the landscape hath become so foreign and convoluted, we hath not a single thought of where to begin."

"Then don't start with politics," I offered, pointing out towards the balcony. "Politics may not be the same beast you dealt with back in your time, but Equestria has grown in ways you might not even be able to fathom until you see it for yourself."

She shook her head slowly, her perfect posture failing by less than an inch, her withers slumping. "We do not believe we are prepared for such an endeavor. We are still coming to terms with the concept of indoor plumbing, let alone modern interaction with our subjects."

"Pff! Okay, I guess ya got me there," I said, cracking a smile. "But you better think of something soon, princess. I don't like the idea of Celestia having to protect you, and believe me, she would do everything she could. That little encounter I had with her back in Ponyville's hospital made that clear as day to me."

"Nor do we enjoy such a thought," she muttered quietly, tapping the edge of her hoof against the surface of the table. "Our sister hath changed much in our absence."

"Good! Glad we're on the same page," I said, my smile quickly disappearing. "Now apologize."

Her ears perked up again, that semi-slouched posture of hers straightening in an instant. "Apologize for what?"

"For threatening my son," I stated, glaring at her. "Also the whole 'Eternal Night' thing you planned to do, which would've killed everyone, but that's not something you just apologize for."

For the first time, she seemed less upset and more taken aback. "Th-that was Nightmare Moon! Thou cannot possibly-!"

"Nightmare Moon only existed because of you," I said, sitting up straight instead of leaning on the table. "Though I suppose you could also say it was partially Celestia's fault, but I feel like that would also be shifting the blame."

There was silence once more between us. The table creaked as she clenched her hoof against the edge of it, and I could've sworn that if she wanted to, she could've cracked the table in half despite her size. That's sharply-trained earth pony magic for you.

"Very well," she said, inhaling deeply and closing her eyes. "We apologize for our grievous transgressions against thee. Art thou satisfied now?"

I tilted my head this way and that, pretending to think on it. "Mmmyeah, I guess so. I already got to shoot you in the face, multiple times at that. Pretty sure that makes us even."

"Good! We would move past such things for the time being."

I shrugged and used my magic to heat up the tea again, pouring myself a fresh cup. "Works for me. Spike is my everything, and I can't explain it, but I get this strong urge to break anyone that talks bad about him in any way...let alone issuing threats, indirect or otherwise."

"Do not apologize for feeling defensive of thy child," she said, shaking her head quickly. "'Tis worthy of respect, despite our feelings on the matter. We would sooner question when ponies began to raise dragon hatchlings!"

"Fine. Instead of that," I offered, cracking a smile. "Let's focus on the fact that we're probably going to be seeing a lot of each other, and I'd rather not let things boil between us."

"Very well," she said, perking up with a faint smile. "What dost thou have in mind?"

I couldn't help but grin as an idea came to me.

"Have you heard any really modern music yet?"

Author's Note

So I did a thing. After a really long time. Like, a ridiculously long time that shouldn't have taken nearly this long.

I made the mistake of getting into FF14.

Heeeeeelp meeeeee.

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Chapter 36 - Hanging With Soldiers

Chapter 36 - Hanging With Soldiers

written by Fire Soul

Now, much to my disappointment I did NOT immediately drag Luna off to the nearest gothic clothes store so I could take her to a late-night party at Vinyl's club. No, quite to the contrary, I wasn't that cruel. If I'm being perfectly honest, I wasn't even all that upset with her to begin with, but someone had to say what I said, and none of the castle staff were going to do it! I doubt Celestia would've done it either.

Plus I mean, let's be honest with ourselves. Luna could pull off the punk goth look really well. Am I wrong? Yeah, I didn't think so. I don't need to be Fashion Police Rarity to know that.

I did tell her about my favorite nightclub, however. Not just because it'd be pretty fitting for her to mingle with her fellow denizens of the night, but because I wanted to help her. Vinyl would probably appreciate the publicity, not to mention it'd give her a very different dynamic from Celestia.

See, miss Unconquered Sun stands up like a perfect and unbreakable statue, and her general benevolence and political savvy gives her an image of being a friend to everyone and someone that only has the best interests of everyone in mind. In that way, she's respectable and the kind of pony everyone should aspire to emulate at the very least.

Luna, however, didn't give me that impression. Just based on what I knew of her history after the conversation we had, I could tell that she was a very fickle and emotional pony. While she certainly carried herself with a stoic confidence that seemed more akin to the practiced airs of the nobility, her affinity for art in all forms and the way she spoke with exuberance about the musicians, artists and warriors of her time told me that the front she put on really didn't mesh with who she was. Her rather destructive civil war with her sister a thousand years prior could attest to that.

If I had to compare the two, Celestia would actually come off as bland. I mean, Celestia's interesting and all, but she converses with just about everyone with that motherly cadence to her voice and practically radiates the soothing confidence that puts so many ponies at ease around her. That's not to say I haven't at least had a glimpse into a side of her that very few get to see, but if I had hands, I could count the glimpses on just one of them.

In any case, I hadn't really come to the castle just to get to know Luna or spend time with Celestia. It was an interesting diversion certainly, but I had a more mundane task to attend to. I knew that whatever Celestia was doing with Spike, I could trust her with him, but that sort of thing went without saying. I'm pretty sure a dragoness would trust Celestia with her eggs! Oh, wait....

Uh, that's a story for another time. I promise.

It was after a short while of her telling me about some mare named Dainty Dove and me telling her about a few of the more recent incidents in history, such as the rise and fall of Stalliongrad, that I left her to her own devices. She apparently had things to take care of herself. I wasn't going to push her on that, I'd done enough of that already. I may be an asshole on occasion, but I would like to believe that I have a good measure of when enough's enough...usually.

With the halls all to myself outside of the occasional guard and wandering staff member, I made my way to the barracks. I say that like it's nothing at all, but in reality, the castle's layout is pretty confusing. The only reason I knew where I was going was because I'd walked these halls plenty of times on the way to the training grounds.

The Royal Guard is a very serious group, don't ever forget that. Their creeds are so firmly embedded and specific that it can take years to learn, and the results speak for themselves. The Royal Guard may technically be a branch of the Equestrian military, and they can be deployed if necessary, but their primary role in everyday life is to do the crown's bidding. It's part of why Celestia's always so busy.

With them taking orders directly from Celestia or whoever she delegates certain tasks to, that means that even when the nation's not shoving problems down her throat, she's reviewing reports and activities from her guards posted all over Equestria. She's turned it into an art form by this point, but that's still a ton of work to do almost every day. Even I wouldn't want to have that much paperwork. I guess that delegating responsibilities helps, as long as you have people you can trust.

The origins of the Royal Guard are pretty interesting too. Without going into details, the best way to describe them is that they're the modern, militarized version of the old Solus religion Equestrians once followed en-masse. Nowadays, you remove the daily sun worship, but keep the structured discipline and military traditions. I'm sure some still pray to the sun, because tradition, but for the most part Royal Guards don't feel the need. Their goddess talks to them directly, after all.

All that being said, it's easy to forget just how serious they are when you're in the barracks watching them take turns doing keg stands. Not recently mind you, though I'm sure they had one Tartarus of a party after the whole Eternal Night thing. I briefly recall several of the guards mentioning something about it being a rite of passage...either that or hazing. If it's the latter, that's a pretty toxic practice.

Either way, the training grounds were as noisy as they'd ever been. The clash of steel on steel and hooves against training dummies sounded off with resounding clarity, even from where I was standing in the hallway. It echoed from the open windows leading to the massive yard area, an area directly next to the mountainside Canterlot as a whole is attached to. I could even hear the distinct noise of drill sergeants putting their new recruits to task.

It wasn't a lifestyle I could ever handle, personally. You know, living that life of strict rigidity and such. Despite my physical fitness, I don't think I'd last a week in boot camp, let alone what the Royal Guard is put through. They regularly have to do boot camp over, specifically to keep them active and ready to go at a moment's notice. The ones in charge tend to come up with their own forms of boot camp to really screw with their soldiers.

First time through? It's a combined version of three different forms of military standard boot camp. Each of the three pony races are separated from each other to be put through a training regimen that suits their race's skills. Makes sense, since a unicorn couldn't possibly keep up with the kind of physical fitness an earth pony soldier would have, nor could they match a trained earth pony in hoof-to-hoof combat. Just the same, it'd be unfair and pointless to put an earth pony through the kind of aerial agility training the pegasi have to go through, because no wings.

The second stage of boot camp winds up intermingling the separated trainees and pairing them up in sets of two and three in order to practice team-building exercises. After a week, they are then grouped up into teams of six in order to execute group strategies, two of each race. The Royal Guard emphasizes being able to rely on your fellow guards just as much as you can rely on yourself. The philosophy is that if you can't learn to work with those around you, then you're already doomed to fail. Stand with your herd or die alone.

Maybe that's harsh, but it works for them, so who am I to criticize?

Mind you, that's being somewhat overly dramatic about it, but it gets the point across. The Royal Guard teams often tend to break up for certain duties, like hallway patrols and the like, or standing guard at the more important rooms of the castle. Not very efficient to have groups of six patrolling a single section of the halls, right?

I was never a fan of them guarding my room whenever I stayed at the castle. Sometimes a filly doesn't want to go home after a long day of studying, but at the same time, how am I supposed to relax when I know they can potentially hear me just outside my door? It's hard to chill when you know there's someone just outside your door.

The two guards standing watch at the entrance to the yard saluted as I walked through, their deepened voices booming out an announcement to everyone there.

"Lady Twilight Sparkle on the yard!"

The guards knew me when they saw me at this point. Ignoring the fact that I was their Captain's younger sister, I regularly stopped in to train with them when I wasn't out and about. At first, they'd been hesitant because I was technically a civilian, regardless of my status as Celestia's student. Fortunately, Celestia had smoothed things over, so it wasn't a problem once I proved I could at least keep up with them during basic training, despite my bad leg.

They were also hesitant because I was their Captain's younger sister and what if I got hurt because of them, but Shining put their minds at ease eventually.

"Alright! At ease, recruits!" I heard an all too familiar voice shout out with all the intensity of a grenade exploding in the distance. "Seems we got ourselves some prissy civilian coming to have a look around and grant you limp-dicked sons of bitches some mercy! Give me a hundred, then take five! I expect you all back out here bright-eyed and bushy-tailed and ready to go for three more hours!"

I heard just three ponies groan in disapproval, and immediately, I cringed. This wasn't going to end well for any of them. I knew how any form of bitching about your exhaustion went down when you're in boot camp.

"What was that?! Who the fuck had the balls?!" I heard him shout again. "Just for that, give me two-hundred more, and you all better pray to Celestia you're done by the time I'm done with our fancy guest! Get to work!!"

They could only be fortunate that no one made a peep aside from the unanimous grunts of exertion. I watched them all bend their forelegs and jut their hindlegs out far behind them, straightening them out and resting their weight on the edges of their hooves. I can't even do those properly, considering the state of my hindleg. Doesn't stop me from trying though.

I began to walk into the yard as their drill instructor approached me, a tall and muscled stallion that looked just as uniform as the others wearing their official armor. You could still tell the recruits apart, but that was only because they hadn't earned their armor yet. They were just wearing the basic, unenchanted stuff meant for sparring and training.

The only reason I recognized the drill instructor was because I spent plenty of time on the yard. His presence was fairly constant, and despite his disapproval of me showing up whenever I damn well please to get in on their training, he respected my ability to keep up, even for a little while, regardless of my status as a legal cripple. For a soft, spongy civvie, I had a lot of drive in his eyes.

"Miss Twilight Sparkle!" he practically shouted, approaching me in a brisk trot. "To what do I owe this unexpected, as always, visit?"

"Sorry to interrupt your big, bad shouting, sergeant," I stated calmly with a smile. "Just looking to speak with a certain big and buff mare recruit of yours. Gadget Steelmare?"

He rubbed his chin, snorting and growling in his throat. "Oh yeah. That one."

I quirked a brow. "Problems? Already?"

"Nothin' too serious, but I can already tell she's gonna be a problem," he said, motioning for me to follow. "She got caught last night flirting with one of the other recruits, and when questioned, she admitted to flirting with one of the guards before that."

I walked with him towards the barracks, the sounds of the recruits working to get through their exercises fading away as we walked. "Well...I mean, that's not surprising, considering."

"Yeah, one of those herms. Still," he said, glancing over at me out of the corner of his eye. "I expect better from ponies that come recommended by you."

I sighed and shrugged. "I'll have a talk with her, but she's a grown mare, and I swear half her brain is in her crotch. I can't make any promises, Barbut."

"Yeah, you do that. Right now, I've got her skipping breakfast so she can clean up the entirety of the barracks, and she doesn't get so much as a slice of bread until it's absolutely spotless," he explained, an almost sadistic grin lighting up his expression. "S'what she gets for not keeping her loins in check. I suggested she get herself a suppressant prescription, but she swore she'd do better and it wouldn't happen again. I'm holding her to that."

"Think she'll make it through?"

He shrugged. "She's strong and she's certainly capable. The physical aspect of boot camp won't be a problem for her, and she's more than capable of following instructions with no complaints. Her magic, however...."

I nodded, frowning. "Yeah, I'm aware. Her magic's about as strong as an early adolescent."

"Stunted, but nothing we can't fix. It'll just be harder on her," he said, stopping in front of the barracks. "She wouldn't be the first we've whipped into shape! Go on in, just don't help her with anything. You can come join the recruits in the yard when she's done if you want. We'll be doing some mock-sparring today!"

"Let me guess: you want to make use of my presence?" I offered with a knowing look. "My magic, specifically?"

He elicited a sound akin to a 'grumph' in response. "You saying you don't want to smack around some new recruits that don't fully understand what they might have to deal with one day?"

I turned to push the door to the barracks open, smiling to myself. "Well, I never said that. There's just a problem regarding my broken muzzle."

"Pff! You're a fancy mage, I'm sure you can come up with something."

He left to go deal with the recruits right after that. Given the short time he spent dealing with me, it was statistically very improbable that all of his recruits got their exercises done. He'd set them up for failure, and I knew for certain that he was relishing the chance to put them through their paces even more than that. He enjoyed his work a little too much.

I stepped into the barracks to the sound of a creaking door, and the vague muttering of what was clearly Gradios. It cut off immediately when I pushed the door shut behind myself, the clunk of the metal latch on it grabbing Gadget's attention. I could see the brief panic in her wide-eyed expression just before she realized it was me and not her drill instructor.

"Oh, damn! You scared me half to death, Canterlot," she sighed, her tall stance slouching visibly. "Do not do that to me."

"Didn't have much choice," I offered, looking her over. "You don't look so great."

Just at a glance, I could tell that she was starting to soak in her own seat. The light coming in through the small windows in the barracks illuminated her fur well enough to show the faint sheen of sweat on her fur, and the way her breathing was exaggerated made the problem all too clear to me. To anyone that didn't know what was up, it would appear that she got some serious exercise in recently, but I knew it was because she was Stalliongradi.

"Da, not so great. I would open the windows more, but I am afraid I will get in trouble," she said, pushing her mop bucket towards where I was. "It is very easy to get in trouble here."

I watched her shakily move the wet mop from the bucket to the floor, doing her best to put some effort into it despite the weakness of her magic. "Well yeah, that's kinda the whole point. Among other things, boot camp tends to drill it into every recruit's head that life's not fair, so they need to be tough enough to deal with any problem."

"Well, I am certainly tough enough! It is the heat I have a problem with." she huffed, panting faintly while doing her best to focus on moving the mop around.

"It's a little stuffy in here," I noticed, my horn lighting up as I reached out to each window in the barracks and shoved them open. "There we go."

"What are you doing?!" she hissed, her eyes darting between the windows. "Close them!"

"Eh, relax," I said, waving her off. "I thought it was stuffy in here! You benefitting from my indulgences is just a side-effect. You're welcome, by the way."

"If you say so..." she muttered, setting her mop down to look in my direction. "So, why are you here, boss?"

"Shopping for furniture for the house, need some input on what you'd like for your room," I said, reaching into my saddlebag to pull out a catalogue. "Pick out what you want, I'll pick it up. Go for stuff that's expensive-looking."

"Why expensive-looking?"

"Appearances," I stated simply, sitting down on one of the beds. "It's my house and you're renting a room from me. The idea that your room wouldn't come furnished is just absurd, and reflects poorly on me."

"It really matters that much?"

"You would be surprised, and probably a little disturbed."

"Well, I cannot stop to look at it right now," she said, motioning to her mop. "I have to get this done."

"That's fine! I'll come around again tomorrow. Just pick out whatever you want and I'll get it ordered," I said, setting the catalogue down on the bed next to myself. "So...heard you couldn't keep your dick in your sheath."

"Oh come on, not you too, boss!" she groaned, rising up to her hindlegs curling her hooves around the mop, instead of using her magic. "She hit on me first! What was I supposed to do?"

"Funny. Barbut didn't mention that part," I said, taking the time to stretch my bad hindleg out in front of myself. "So she hit on you, and you reciprocated?"

"Da, but the instructor did not care," she said, scowling at the floor as she pushed the mop around. "I am here with no breakfast cleaning the barracks, and that cyka is getting away with it!"

"Yeah. Not very fair, is it?" I asked, though I already knew the answer. "That's just how it is. Either way, I suggest you keep yourself in check, at least until you're out of boot camp. You're under far more intense scrutiny because you come recommended by both Celestia and myself. You can bet that mare wanted to get you in trouble, but I'd only assume that if she knew you got in here because of someone like me."

She snorted and stopped mopping for just a second to stare at the wall. "I am surrounded by small, attractive mares, and you are telling me not to flirt with them?"

It was difficult to really get a read on her, but judging by the way she was tensing up and twitching her ear, she seemed agitated. Not agitated as in, I'm going to break something, but more in the sense that she was mulling something over in her head and she really didn't like where it was going.

She turned to give me a dirty look, her expression seeming more like she'd just bitten into a rotten lemon. "You are pure evil, Canterlot."

"Yyyup! You should know that by now," I said, cracking a smile. "You're just gonna have to suck it up and control yourself. Feel those impulses to flirt, and recognize them as something to be crushed under your hoof."

"You may as well tell me to go on suppressants," she said, turning back to her work. "That better not be what you are telling me to do."

"Nah, not at all! Just saying that you need to keep yourself in check," I said, slipping off of the bed. "At least until you're out of boot camp."

"Yeah, yeah, sure thing..." she grumbled, glancing back at me. "Is that all?"

"Yup, pretty much! I'll probably see you out in the yard," I said, a grin slowly spreading across my face as I turned to leave. "I'm going to be assisting with training today."

"...I feel like I should be afraid."

"Considering he's probably going to make an example of you because you're on his shit-list?" I said, pushing the door open. "Yeah, you should be."

I left Gadget to stew in that small bout of anxiety, stepping out of the barracks just as another instructor and another small batch of recruits trotted past me. Her voice bellowed out as she stomped past me, the recruits trotting in step and repeating after her. There were three of them lagging behind, but that wasn't very surprising to me. According to Shining Armor, there's always at least one pony that winds up overestimating what they're capable of. They might be able to fight through it, they might not, but there's always at least one.

I wandered the yard, observing the current members of the Royal Guard going through their own motions while the recruits were being put through their paces by their instructors. You could tell the difference between the recruits and the Royal Guard very easily: the recruits had armor that was less polished and less intricate, while the Royal Guards had thoroughly polished and shined armor that carried a special sheen to it that someone trained the way I was could see plain as day.

By the time I made my way to Barbut's group, they were deep into a new set of exercises, likely to further punish them for that one idiot that dared to voice a complaint. I could see the sweat in their fur, and it was more than obvious that they needed a break, but the whole point of this kind of thing is to make you realize that you're capable of far more than you think you are. That or you can leave, no one's stopping you. You just don't get to come back.

While Barbut barked his orders at them to work them through their exercises, also known as a good, long ordeal, I took the time to follow the exercises off to the side. It was unlikely I'd be able to keep up, but I also didn't need to. It was just something to do until he was ready to use me. I could feel it getting my blood flowing as I worked through the push-ups, my heart began to race the longer and faster I trotted in place, and being able to use their training dummies for the unicorn guards was a pretty good way of flexing my arcane muscles. They're designed to function the same way dragonscale works. You know, making magic slide right off and do very little to them, things like that.

Having to lift one of those a hundred times is a slight strain for me. For the average guard, it was an arduous task just to do that twenty times. That's just the power of a trained mage.

By the time ten minutes had passed, I felt the familiar heave of panting breaths in my chest and the exhaustion in my legs. My horn had a pleasant tingle in it, a clear sign of exertion, and the occasional errant spark told me I was getting the equivalent to a good burn going. I had nothing else planned for my vast stores of magic, so putting some good work in seemed like a good idea to me, on top of whatever Barbut had planned for me.

"Alright! At ease, recruits," I heard him shout, which almost prompted me to relax as well. "Since you're all so disinclined to bother with physical exertion, I think it's about time we introduced you to a special training partner that likes to pay us a visit!"

I took that as my cue to walk over and stand next to him. I could feel the eyes of the recruits focusing on me, but some of them were too unnerved and winded by what they'd just gone through to look anywhere but straight ahead until they were prompted to do otherwise. Those were the smart ones.

"This-" he half-shouted, motioning a hoof in my direction. "-is Lady Sparkle of House Sparkle. Accomplished scholar, younger sister of the Captain of the Guard, and Princess Celestia's personal protege. She was also responsible for the redemption of Princess Luna, Celestia's sister. As those of you with more than a single brain cell can probably also guess, she is a very accomplished mage."

Several of the recruits focused their gazes on me in an entirely different way, particularly the unicorns. There were many stereotypes and racist beliefs that still endured to this day, but there's a grain of truth in every lie. In this case, it's an absolute truth: unicorns have a natural, instinctual draw towards other unicorns with immense magical power.

Our race has a history of idolizing unicorns with great magical power, regardless of whether or not they had good intentions. It led to several dark periods of history, along with several far greater ones, but it was an immutable part of our instincts. It played into unicorn elitism, and the fact that the number of unicorns hooking up with other races in a more established relationship was far lower than with any other race doing the same thing.

I can only imagine how many unicorns absolutely hated some of our past leaders, but wound up hate-fucking them anyway.

Mind you, I'm not saying that all unicorns are driven by instinct like that, but some of us are far more in-tune with it than others. We're all tempered by the society we live in though, so even if it's instinct, there are plenty of things about a pegasus or earth pony that excite us as well. Don't try to tell that to the nobility though. The very insinuation that we might still be driven by our base instincts doesn't sit well with them...mostly because it reflects very, very poorly on them as a whole.

"You all will be training with her today. We're going to see how well you lot can deal with a mage gone rogue!"

I grinned and eyed Barbut, who gave me a quick nod. "This training is very simple! I'm going to restrict myself to the third tier of spells in my repertoire, non-lethal, and you're going to come at me in groups of twelve for ten minutes. If even one of you can lay a single hoof on me, so much as touch me, I'll consider it a success on your part. Sound good, Barbut?"

"Sounds perfectly fine, Lady Sparkle," he said, giving me a brief smile before returning his neutral gaze to his recruits. "Obviously, don't aim for her face. I assume all of you know better than that. So help me if you don't. Now clear the yard so I can break you all down into group of twelve!"

It didn't take me long to find myself in the center of the area of the yard we had to ourselves. Word was already getting spread around the rest of the yard about what was going on, and the other guards were already starting to come around to watch. I didn't exactly plan on making much of a show about it, but if they wanted to watch, it wasn't my place to stop them.

I went through a few stretches before the recruits were ready. I could see Gadget had finished with her work and had been assigned with a group already, despite just getting there. I wasn't going to take it easy on her just because she was hungry however, and believe me, she was hungry. You don't do the kind of strenuous physical activity the Royal Guard requires in boot camp without needing the appropriate sustenance.

At least she didn't look scared.

"Alright, first group, take one minute to strategize, then get into position!"

I glanced in their direction and turned to face them. Four earth ponies, four pegasi, and four unicorns. They were already talking, trying to come up with a strategy to reach me, and to their credit, they at least didn't look afraid. Whether that was due to them being ignorant or just genuinely being excited by the prospect of getting to take a shot at me, I couldn't say.

Once Barbut said they were out of time, the four pegasi took to the sky above me, circling around me in a sloppy circular pattern. It was easy to tell that they weren't trained, despite my lack of military training. The same could be said for the earth ponies and the unicorns. The earth ponies hadn't bothered to grab a shield of any sort to protect them from my spells, and the unicorns weren't hunkered down behind their stockier frames.

Regardless of a pony's resilience when it comes to magic, it's never a good idea to take any spell head-on. You always want something significant between you and a blast from a unicorn, let alone some kind of magical relic. This was going to be fun.

"Alright, recruits," Barbut shouted, stomping a hoof against the dirt. "Subdue the rogue mage!"

Author's Note

Hooray, a thing!

I feel bad about how long it took.

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Chapter 37 - Toying With Soldiers

Chapter 37 - Toying With Soldiers

written by Fire Soul

I could see through their strategy the moment I really stopped to take in their positioning. It was flawed right out of the gate, but I couldn't blame them for that. I'd seen this kind of thing before, during the other times Barbut had used me as a very hostile training dummy for his recruits. This was meant to be both a lesson and a break from their training.

The Royal Guard stands as the top tier of ponies in the military. Everyone, no matter their origin, is put through boot camp as if they were new to the military, despite many of the recruits being plucked from other branches. They're meant to be the best of the best, given the privilege of serving the crown directly, and that meant they needed to be prepared for any situation...including dealing with a foe that could easily take them apart, if not for their armor.

Unfortunately for the recruits, they didn't have that special armor, not that it would've helped them against me.

The pegasi were easy to deal with. They were flying above me at approximately thirty hooflengths above me, likely preparing for diving maneuvers to end this quickly, with the earth ponies and unicorns in front of me forming an oppressive barricade. Police tactics when dealing with street mages. That meant whoever was deemed in charge of this group was probably selected from the Canterlot police force, or they had a history of serving in the police.

Of course that likely meant they were on the Mafia's payroll, but that didn't matter in that moment.

The reason they were flying at that height was because for the average street mage, that height meant their telekinesis couldn't grip them with enough power to pull them from the air, and the distance gave them ample opportunity to put their superior aerial agility to use in avoiding any spells they cast. Their error in judgment was that I wasn't some untrained street mage.

I reached out and took hold of them by their hooves, freezing them in their circling pattern and catching them by surprise. In the brief moment where their wings began to flail to right their flight, I yanked downward and snatched all four of them out of the air. Their wings couldn't save them from me dragging them to ground level and tossing them towards their earth pony and unicorn compatriots with a quick flick of my head.

"I am not a street mage! I am a rogue mage," I shouted quickly, eyeing the pegasi with a stern gaze. "If this were a real encounter with a rogue mage, I would've grabbed you by your wings and snapped them like twigs! Try. Harder."

"Did I mention this was timed, recruits?" Barbut chimed in from the sidelines. "You've got five minutes to lay a hoof on that mage! Get your lazy flanks off the ground and get back in the air, pegasi!! You think a rogue mage would give you the chance to lounge around and whine?! You'd be fried to a crisp if this were real!"

That got them moving, if only because I'm sure Barbut had made it clear that slackers got the entire group punished. Immediately, the pegasi scrambled to get back in the air, flying much higher than they had previously, almost to the point of uselessness now. If they decided to dive at me, I'd see them coming long before they ever reached me, and I had several ways of evading them...including not evading and just blasting them out of the air.

Just to test them, I sent out a wave of kinetic energy in the direction of the earth ponies and unicorns. I watched it crash over them like a tide, pushing against them from every side except behind them. To their credit, the earth ponies didn't stagger too much, though it did catch them by surprise. Only their raw strength kept them on their hooves. The unicorns, however, saw it coming and all but one managed to defend themselves from it before it could topple them. The one that was too slow on the draw didn't fall over, but it made him slide back and crumple down to the ground in order to not topple backwards.

The pegasi took that opportunity to dive at me. It was a shame I wasn't going to be where they were headed for long. I let the pegasi draw closer while preparing two different spells, weaving the array above my horn while weaving another in the direction of the earth ponies and unicorns. Because I wasn't going for something lethal, it was far easier to craft a stunning bolt for the pegasi, and a good distraction for the bigger targets in that scenario.

I clung to the array and wove another around it, securing a teleportation for myself while the pegasi closed in. I pretended to pay them no mind, putting the final touches on the second array before executing them. The earth ponies had recovered just in time to catch a stunning bolt to their chests. I didn't take the time to observe how the unicorns would react to the attack, though they did try to stop my bolts from reaching their companions, albeit in vain.

Just as the pegasi were about to reach me, I disappeared. In a brief instant, I was behind the unicorns and the earth ponies, watching them for a time. It was amusing to see them looking around the yard for me, though the pegasi were the first to spot me. They had already landed and taken off again, and it's pretty easy to spot someone in an open field when you're up in the air.

That didn't help them, however. On top of having greater focus and knowledge of the arcane arts, I had the gift of overwhelming force on my side. Just as the unicorns turned to face me, I grabbed them by their forehooves and yanked them out from under all four of them. They all stumbled and clonked their heads on the ground, but I was glad to see the earth ponies quickly pulling them back on their hooves. They didn't need the help, but it was teamwork.

Unfortunately for them, they didn't last. The combined knowledge that they were outmatched as well as under-equipped began to wear down their morale, despite a few of them still trying their best and encouraging the others to get back on their hooves. Again and again I allowed them to come close, only to push them back or teleport out of their reach, purposely baiting them to come after me.

When their time was up, I could tell they were frustrated and even fairly exhausted. I'd led them all on a merry chase, but the end result was an inevitability. None of them had managed to lay so much as the tip of their hoof on me. I stood in the center of the area, taking the time to catch my breath while Barbut approached from the sidelines.

He wasn't coming to give them a 'Good job!' however.

"That was the most piss-poor display I've ever seen! You think relying on the same tactics the police use is going to get you anywhere against a mage that knows what they're doing?!" he shouted for everyone to hear. "I don't think I've ever dealt with stupidity of this caliber! Your target, once again, is not a street mage! She is not some sloppy-seconds waste of her father's load idiot who thinks she's unstoppable just because she can make something go boom with her horn! She is a trained, professional mage gone rogue! Use your heads, recruits!"

I could see the anger in his eyes as he watched the first group walk off of the yard, a few of them shooting dirty looks my way, though they did so as discreetly as they possibly could. Wasn't the first time I'd experienced that sort of thing, definitely wouldn't be the last. There were a lot of egos big and small in the Royal Guard, the former usually far more than the latter, and some rich noblemare putting them through their paces like their years of prior training never mattered at all is a real good way to bruise those egos.

I opted for a much more aggressive approach once the second group came at me. As soon as Barbut gave them the order, two unicorns and a lone earth pony charged me, and these three seemed like they had their heads in the game better than the entirety of the first group did. Both unicorns were working together to form a forward-facing barrier in front of the earth pony, keeping in pace with him while he charged headlong towards me. A perfectly viable and much more thought-out strategy compared to previous attempts.

Along with their bold move, I was almost caught off-guard by a volley of magic missiles from behind them. The other three unicorns had decided to try and divide my focus with a quick barrage, not to mention the pegasi had slipped out of my direct view, though I could hear the powerful beats of their wings. Two were coming around on my left, and the other two were approaching from my right. I silently applauded their coordination and their creativity. The three remaining earth ponies had taken up position in front of and behind the three unicorns, two behind them and one in front, likely because of my ability to teleport.

All in all, I gave them a seven out of ten, maybe a B minus if we're going for a school grade. Their plan was clearly designed to counteract what I'd done to trounce the first group, and mixing their strategies up to be more active in their pursuit of me was a step in the right direction. It was definitely better than the bare minimum the first group had put forth because they underestimated me.

Sadly, they were still missing the most crucial detail...among other things.

The pegasi were the first to feel my restrained wrath. They were easy enough to deal with, but I felt like being flashy when the opportunity presented itself. Instead of shooting all of them myself, I grabbed hold of them and yanked three of them in the way of the magic missiles the unicorns had fired at me. I saw three of the four pegasi's faces twist up in pain when they hit, but not in any way that would incapacitate them. I guess those unicorns really didn't want to hurt me.

Without missing a beat, I spun them around each other and forcibly mashed them together a few times, the clang of their metal armor sounding off whenever they hit one another. After four times, I heard the weak groans of the four dazed pegasi, and with a simple flick of my head I threw them into a pile far behind myself.

My attention shifted to the charging earth pony next. If we were in a narrow hallway, the whole forward-facing barrier idea would've worked out perfectly fine, especially against a street mage. I saw all the flaws and ways to exploit them from step one. I reached out with my telekinesis to the left and right of him, and smashed inward from around the sides of the barrier, mashing against both sides of his body and making his legs cross and seize up under him. The end result was him taking a pretty nasty tumble head-over-hooves. I winced when I saw his snout mash into the ground as he flipped over. He was going to feel that one.

I could hear the shuffling of the pegasi behind me, trying to untangle themselves from each other. Guess they weren't as ready to give up as I figured they'd be. Not that it would help much, because in a real encounter, they would've already been dead. They took those bolts directly to their faces, and if I'd been trying to kill them, all four of those shots would've zapped their eyes out of their skulls.

Just as the pegasi began to stand again, I tilted my head back until my horn was pointing straight up at the sky and sent a wave of kinetic force back that knocked all four of them out of the area, and out of the encounter for the time being. The earth pony had managed to get back to his hooves, but his nose was bloodied and his muzzle had a few scuff marks. He hadn't taken that fall very well for a trained soldier.

I gave them the time to reorganize themselves, easily swatting aside another volley of magic from the unicorns and stepping back while they all got back to their hooves and prepared to make another attempt on me. I could see they'd been shaken by the removal of their pegasi, and the utter devastation of their entire plan, but that was only to be expected. The unicorns looked like they were far more aware of what they were up against than the earth ponies. I could see it in their eyes.

We were nearing the five minute mark however, and I just didn't find it fair that most of them were standing over there relatively unscathed compared to their pegasi companions.

It wouldn't do to make them go boom. That would've torn up the ground, and I would've caught a fresh slice of Tartarus for that. I had a better idea in mind, one that would put something of a strain on me. I wanted more of a workout.

I chose to go for overkill. I began to form two different arrays, one to erect a more intricate shield, and one for a surprise later. I still had another group to chew through after all, and if they thought I wasn't playing around with the second group, well...they were sorely mistaken.

Forming a shield came so naturally to me that it only took a few moments to piece the array together. It's hard to describe how it feels, but it's something inherently different from most other spells. That's not to say that I can't form other spells just as fast, I am a trained mage, but I never had to study and practice to be good at pulling them off. Well...not as much as I should've. If you're someone who had something come naturally to you after just a few attempts, you know what I'm talking about.

Once the shield appeared around me, the entire match was a foregone conclusion. I looked over the shield's makeup while I walked towards the remaining recruits, mostly because I wanted to be sure I wouldn't shear off their faces outright. See, I'd crafted the shield to be an oscillating shield, same as the one I used to deal with Nightmare Moon, and because she was a freak-beast that could touch it and not get her hoof knocked away, I feel the need to explain what this shield would do to a normal pony.

This shield was designed specifically to disperse the inertia of incoming projectiles, physical or magical, by altering their trajectory on impact due to the shield constantly rotating in one direction. The more power you give it, the faster it rotates, and the more sturdy it is. There's an upper limit of just how much it can take based on the array used to form it, at least for most ponies that learn how to do it, but my knowledge and skill gives me a certain amount of freedom to tweak the array and alter it to suit my needs.

With all that being said, try to think about this: what would happen if I ran into a pony and pinned them to a wall with this barrier, and then poured a massive surge of power into it? The answer is chunky salsa if I bother to try hard enough. Mind you, that's an absurd waste of arcane energy, but it's certainly possible.

They were lucky there weren't any walls behind them. As it stood, I'd just have to settle for an easy ring-out. All I had to do...was walk.

I began to meander towards them, head held high with pride as I went. I smiled at the remaining recruits and made a point of giving my shield another round of glances. My horn was glowing with raw power as I funneled more energy into my barrier, the dust and dirt at the base of it kicking up and whipping around me.

"I wouldn't recommend touching this!" I shouted over the minor noise the shield was starting to make. "Might rip your fur out! Now I'm gonna keep walking, and whatever happens happens!"

It was a shame they hadn't displayed a pattern that involved them having flexible minds. Upon losing their established plan, their teamwork suffered a critical failure. The earth ponies charged, likely an attempt to keep me far away from their unicorns, and the unicorns continued to fire volleys of spells at me. The spells didn't just bounce off my shield, they were knocked away with enough force to send them flying toward the walls of the training grounds, faster than the unicorns had fired them at me. The earth ponies, however, weren't quite as fortunate.

The first one to reach me reared up and brought his forehooves down as hard as he could on my shield. I knew exactly how that was going to turn out, and I quickly responded by dialing back the torque in my shield. The moment his hooves hit, they held him up for only an instant before my barrier yanked them right out from under him, causing his body to twist and get thrown off-balance. I watched him collapse forward, and the painful impact of his face, neck and armored side against my shield was accompanied by a crackling scraping sound against his armor, and a sound I really don't know how to describe when his face and neck touched it. How do you describe the tearing of fur?

As his weight settled against the shield, his body was spun around and his hindlegs tried to keep up, all in vain. No matter how much he attempted to correct his balance, there was no way he was going to stabilize himself unless he removed himself from my barrier. The end result was him being thrown off to one side in a haphazard tumble hard enough to toss him right out of the ring. I continued to walk while I watched him clutch at one of his forelegs in pain, the side of his armor having some nasty scratches on one side.

Well...I mean, I warned all of them.

One other earth pony made that exact same mistake before the other two saw it and backed off. The unicorns were still firing spells at me, but they were barely registering for me. They were all running out of ground, and the outcome was an inevitability. It only took one more minute before my shield forcibly ejected each of them from the ring.

"I believe that means I win, and you're all dead," I said while looking over to Barbut. "You've got your work cut out for you. They still haven't figured it out."

He walked over to me with a scowl. "I noticed. At least we know they were trained as well as they seemed when we picked 'em."

"True. Let's get the next group, this won't take long."

As much fun as it was for me to get a few shots in on the new recruits and thoroughly bruise their egos for a few minutes, I wanted to get to the point that mattered. While I found it strange that Barbut was holding Gadget back from joining the final group, I figured he probably had something special in mind for her, so I shrugged it off.

I gave them one minute to figure out the correct course of action. They did not succeed.

One by one, I grabbed each of them and roughly tossed them out of the ring as if they were dolls to be discarded. Toys to be tossed aside by a petulant and ungrateful child, one that never learned to cherish what they'd been given to play with. The kind you want to slap clean across the face with the side of your hoof when you hear them crying so loud they may as well be screaming bloody murder in the middle of the store.

Look, I really hate it when I have to put up with that shit, okay?

"I can't believe what I'm seeing," Barbut growled out as he walked out onto the field once more. "Not a single one of you could lay a single hoof on some soft, squishy noblemare!"

"I take offense to that, Barbut," I chimed in. "I like to think of myself as festively plump in all the right places, thank you very much."

He rolled his eyes and didn't find it necessary to give me a direct response. Instead, he walked up to Gadget, who had been dutifully standing at the sidelines, conspicuously separated from the rest of the group. With the way he was looking her up and down, I had a feeling that whatever he had planned for her, it was going to happen right that moment.

"Miss Steelmare," he started, practically hissing her name out. "Since you found yourself in such good shape that you thought you could get away with getting under someone's tail on my watch, I can only assume you think you're very clever. Maybe you can put some of that energy to use here instead!"

So that was his game. I wasn't going to say anything against it, since that would just undermine Gadget's position even further. Plus I could see what Barbut was doing. He wasn't taking any sides, but he was giving Gadget an opportunity that could also be a punishment if she fucked it up.

Once Gadget stepped into the ring, I dug my hooves in. Despite knowing I could take her no problem, some part of me found her size and presence intimidating. She was staring at me like she was trying to decipher a puzzle, a kind of stare I knew all too well from many, many nights spent with my fifth cup of coffee and a thick tome I needed to finish studying. Well...need is a strong word.

"I will repeat myself one last time, since all of you appear to lack the attention span necessary to take your instructor's words to heart," Barbut shouted from the sidelines. "Use your head! You have five minutes, starting now!"

I expected her to make a move immediately. Considering her lack of arcane aptitude, a bumrush would've made sense. It was her only option in this situation. Well, her only option if she planned on fighting me and completing her task.

Instead, she began to carefully step off to one side, moving towards my left. I only intended to give her one minute, since I couldn't risk showing favoritism, nor could I take it easy on her within that short amount of time. The moment she tried to step closer to me, I fired a bolt of magic directly at her neck. She managed to dodge it enough that it only grazed her fur. She took another step, and I immediately fired up another barrier, brighter and stronger than the last one. I wanted it to be as intimidating as possible.

My actions froze her in her tracks. Her eyes were wide and darting around, trying to find some kind of vulnerability, but I already knew she wouldn't find anything. The end result, once she realized there was no simple way of dealing with me, was a silent stand-off. Then she did something I didn't expect.

She bolted further to my left, running right out of the ring.

My focus immediately darted over to Barbut, who was already moving across the field. The other recruits were looking between us in confusion, but I could see the glimmer in Barbut's eye. He looked angry, beyond upset, but there was a glimmer of hope there. I already knew exactly where this was going.

"What is your major malfunction, coward?!"

Oof! Even Gadget flinched at the booming tone of his voice. I watched her step back, a hesitant backstep that only prompted him to step in closer to her. The rage in his eyes made him look like a rampaging minotaur, and I could tell Gadget was fighting the urge to either run away, or take a swing at him and then run away. Well, that was my guess, at least. Maybe I was projecting.

"I don't know which was worse. Watching you waffle around in the middle of a combat situation like a pony that's just begging someone to put her out of her misery," he said, turning to point at the white line in the dirt that marked the boundaries. "Or the fact that you, in some bizarre leap of logic that someone of sound mind like myself could never comprehend, decided that defying a direct order was a good idea!"

That was when Gadget made a mistake. At least, what I would consider a mistake in that situation. She opened her mouth.

"It was pointless to fight!" she stated, her voice tinged with desperation. "I stood no chance!"

"I did not give you permission to speak, recruit!"

"But she-!"

Barbut stomped his hoof hard enough to cause a tremor in the ground, nothing serious, but you could feel it in your hooves. It was that special kind of earth pony-quality tremor that rumbled through your hooves and into the bones of your legs. Felt kinda good on my bad leg actually, I could've gone for another one. Did I mention he's an earth pony?

"Drop and give me fifty, recruit! RIGHT NOW!!"

I could see the frustration on Gadget's face even from where I was. When you hang out with the Royal Guard as often as I do, you learn to tell the difference between a stoic face, and a stoic face that's trying real hard to hold something back. A life on the streets didn't tend to make someone very good at being yelled at, and Gadget was no exception. I considered it a testament to her character that it only took her a couple seconds to drop down and get straight to work.

Barbut glanced back at me out of the corner of his eye. I wasn't sure exactly what he wanted from me, or if it meant anything at all, but I could see his smile. He was having fun.

He returned his attention to Gadget when she hit her twentieth push-up. "You're going to explain something to me, recruit. You're gonna explain it real clear, and real concise."

"Yes sir!"

"What was your reason for fleeing the exercise and disobeying a direct order?"

Gadget huffed and continued to quickly push her way through her punishment. "I had no chance of winning, sir!"

Barbut lowered his head to get closer to her. "You think that justifies you not doing what you're told?!"

"No sir!"

"Then you'd be wrong!!"

Gadget paused a second after he spoke, staring at the ground. "...What?"

"DID I TELL YOU TO STOP?!" Barbut roared, looming over Gadget's near-prone form.

Gadget immediately went right back to her exercise, her armor seeming to do nothing to impede her pace. That didn't really surprise me, considering the shape she was in. When you take that good care of yourself, doing push-ups with some extra weight is usually the standard.

Barbut lowered down until he was almost right in Gadget's ear. "You sure you didn't run because you were afraid, recruit? You didn't even try!"

"No sir!"

"I think you're lying!" he barked, straightening up and marching around her. "I think you saw that tiny mare with her big shiny horn ready to blow you to bits and you froze like the coward you are!"

"I'm not that small, Barbut!" I rebuked quickly.

"Can it, civvie!" he shouted back at me, his focus entirely on Gadget despite my interruption.

He was like a predator, with how he stalked around her, watching her finish up her punishment. His eyes hadn't moved away from Gadget the entire time, no doubt just so he could count just in case she had the gall to try and skip a few. It wouldn't have been the first time a recruit had tried to put one over on their instructor.

"You care to repeat that, street-mare?! Care to explain to us again why you decided to tuck your tail and run away?!"

Gadget, having finished her final push-up, stood up at attention once more. "I-"

"I did not tell you to stand, recruit!!" he roared at her, getting close enough that he had to look nearly straight up at her to get in her face. "Continue!"

"I saw no reason to make an attempt, sir!" she said, only sounding faintly out of breath. Not surprising, considering how physically fit she was. "I was alone with no way to incapacitate or kill her! If this was a real situation, it would have been suicide!"

Barbut stepped back and glared into her eyes. "Sounds to me like you thought you'd be scared to die if this was a live encounter. Am I right, recruit?"

Gadget's gaze stayed straight forward, pointedly trying to avoid looking down at him. "No, sir!"

"Are you saying that because you think it's the right answer, recruit?! You lying to me?!"

Her eyes darted in my direction for an instant, then quickly returned to staring straight ahead. "...Yes, sir."

"Then you give it to me straight, recruit," he growled, straightening his posture. "Were you, or were you not afraid?"

"Yes, sir! I was afraid sir!" she stated loud and clear, adjusting her posture to stand straighter as well.

Barbut remained silent for a time, stock-still where he stood, his eyes searching her for any sign of weakness. It was a solid half-minute before he finally broke his silence. A loud, piercing laugh that echoed over the yard, with several of the other Royal Guards watching the exchange joining in. I couldn't help my amused smile, but I refrained from joining in. Gadget certainly surprised me, let alone Barbut.

"She's the only one that figured it out! Fuck me!" he shouted amidst his laughter.

I took the time to watch the other recruits on the other side of the field. They all seemed confused, it was plain as day on their faces, but at the very least they stayed at attention. There were a few occasions where I'd seen them start to get relaxed and cozy watching this kind of thing play out, and I swear Barbut has eyes in the back of his head for that shit.

Barbut calmed himself quickly enough, though his smile remained as he pointed at Gadget's chest. "Sometimes fear is the correct response, recruit. But only if you're in control of it, and not the other way around."

I grinned wide. "I know how to pick 'em, don't I?"

"Yeah, yeah, get any more smug and your head will be enough to let you float around the world," he responded, turning away from Gadget to walk out into the middle of the field once more. "Listen up, you ignorant, dim-witted morons!"

I chose that moment to go ahead and step off the field. My generously-offered services were no longer needed, so that meant I could get something to drink and watch all of this unfold. It wasn't anything I hadn't seen before, though I got the added bonus of being able to see how this went with a group of recruits where someone actually figured out the lesson plan, even to such a small extent.

One of the guards had a bottle of water to offer me, and he walked around the recruits and observers to bring it to me. Some tall, stocky stallion, looked like he worked out. Kind of my type, but I didn't make a habit of taking the guards to bed. Reputation notwithstanding, it'd be really awkward to put my brother through that.

"Out of all the ponies in this batch of pond-scum that we dare to consider recruits, the one we scraped out of a gutter was the only one out of all of you who actually did what she was told to do," Barbut explained in his usual elevated, overwhelming tone. "She used her head! You were all told more than once to do so, but instead you all fell back on your training. You all failed."

Some of them looked indignant. No doubt most of them wanted to say something to defend themselves, but there were a few among them that I could see from where I was standing. Just a few, but enough. They were the ones whose facial features had changed just enough that I could tell they were taking the lesson to heart better than most of their peers. That was a good sign.

"The Royal Guard are not like the police, nor are we like any other branch of the Equestrian military. We are given the greatest honor. The honor of standing as representatives of Princess Celestia, and following her will! That means that we function differently, we think differently," he continued, beginning to pace back and forth in front of the line of recruits. "And if you cannot learn this, you have no place among our ranks!"

The other guards that had come to watch had begun to mutter amongst themselves. This was fairly standard practice whenever Barbut got to mess with new recruits, and the others always gave him shit for it. He was one of those passionate believers, the ones that believed in the purity and good will of Princess Celestia above all else. Not everyone shared his beliefs, so of course they took jabs at him over it. He tended to take it in stride.

"You all executed progressively more intricate tactics against your target, but your tunnel-vision, your reliance on your training, blinded you all to what mattered more than anything else," he said, pointing to me. "You never had a chance against her to begin with. You had no ranged weaponry, you did not have the advantage of a surprise attack, and you had no nullstone, not to mention your armor was of no benefit against her. You would've been better off naked, because at least then you could have run away faster."

"Sir!" one of the recruits shouted, stepping forward. "Permission to speak!"

Barbut regarded him with a frown, but motioned to him with a hoof. "Go ahead, recruit. You have something you want to say?"

"Were we set up for failure from the start?"

"Yes, you were," Barbut said, his scowl slowly turning into a toothy grin. "But only if you decided to follow my orders."

The stallion seemed even more confused. "...We were supposed to defy orders from a superior, sir?"

Barbut shook his head. "Don't take it the wrong way, recruit. You were supposed to follow my orders, but only if those orders didn't conflict with the scenario you found yourself in. You were in a no-win situation, under orders to throw yourself against a wall and die in the process. Do you value your life, recruit?"

"Of course, sir!"

Barbut stepped in towards him. "Then why wasn't your first thought to retreat?"

"Because we were-...."

I could see the gears turning now. I mean, many of them probably figured it out already, but the point remains.

"Because you were what, recruit? Because you were following orders?" Barbut asked. "Maybe you weren't taking it seriously and putting yourself in the situation presented because it was just a training exercise?"

None of them had much of anything to say to that. The answer was plain as day to everyone there. The Royal Guard was strange like that, encouraging the open-minded individual thinking needed to make decisions on whether or not to follow your orders.

"Having fun, Barbut?"

All the Royal Guards stiffened and stood at attention, and one of them near one of the other entrances to the yard called out with a booming voice.

"Captain Shining Armor on the yard!"

Author's Note

I guess they're just gonna come out when they come out.

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