The Clown Prince of Equestria

Well, hello there, friends! Welcome to the story of my new life! Well, at least I THINK it happened this way.  Then again, now that I'm the Clown Prince of Equestria, it could've been something out of the theatre. Although, I doubt my feelings for my beloved are fabricated, but, I think we're getting off topic here.

Once upon a time, I was named Jerome Fredricks. I was just an ordinary man, making a living working for a company you probably wouldn't recognize.  I had a modest, simple house where I lived all on my lonesome, save for a pet dog named Sparks. When I didn't have to go to work,  I was happy to stay home and write some fanfiction for my various interests.

Now, just what were these interests, you might ask? Well, I'm glad you asked.

I am a brony, which for those of you who don't know, means I am an adult male who watches My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. Not only that, but I was a big fan of Batman, or rather, one of his greatest foes: The Joker.

Say what you will about how the Joker is a twisted and evil madman. I'm right there with you, in fact. But, the true reason behind why I'm a fan of the Clown Prince of Crime is really quite simple: he's funny, and his origins really make me feel bad for him. Well, at least the ones involving his pregnant wife being gunned down do.

By now I'm sure you're wondering what this all has to do with the tale I'm about to tell you. Well, here's the answer to that question.

It was San Diego Comic-Con 2015. I was clad in what was supposed to be the Joker's outfit from Batman: Arkham Origins, complete with white make-up smeared all over my face, a lipstick smile, and a green mop of hair, when I was approached by a mysterious merchant in a cloak. He told me that he knew that I would truly enjoy the chance to own my very own set of Joker weaponry.

I told him that I would be indeed, so he brought me over to his little booth, and as we talked and laughed, I began to feel an odd desire to touch a strange little snow globe that looked kinda like it had Ponyville inside of it.

The merchant seemed to notice this, and asked me if I'd like to buy it, and that he'd lower the price of the Joker weapons if I did. Who could refuse such an offer? I accepted, and gave the man my money.

The moment I touched that snow globe, however, everything went black.

...

"Ugh... what happened last night? Did that guy in the cloak slip me a roofie or something?" asked Jerome Fredricks as he sat up and rubbed the back of his head. He frowned as he realized the voice that came out of his mouth wasn't HIS voice. "Why in the Hell do I sound like Troy Baker's Joker?" he muttered to himself.

Looking around, Jerome noticed that he was lying under a tree near what appeared to be a small town of some kind. He didn't know why, but the town looked very familiar to him somehow. As he began to get up, however, a surge of electricity ran through his leg when he touched it with his palm, making it go numb.

"Ow! What the-?!" yelled Jerome, looking at his dark purple leather gloved hand. There, on the palm of his hand, was unmistakably a Joy Buzzer. A quick search of his person indicated that he also had Joker's toy gun, fully loaded and complete with "Bang!" flag, three Chattering Teeth, actual X-Ray Goggles, several packets of Razor Joker Cards, and-

"The Titan dart gun?!" gasped Jerome in shock and horror as he looked at the weapon, complete with a full vial of Titan. With this, he could make his own army of monsters, and rule this place like a-

Before Jerome could finish his thought, it abruptly became night time.

"What... this is just like the Return of Harmony from Season 2 of Friendship is Magic!" said Jerome.

"That's because it IS the Return to Harmony from Friendship is Magic, Mr. J!"

Jerome knew that voice anywhere. All he had to do was turn his head, and there she stood, in her trademark red-and-black uniform no less.

"Harley? What are you doing here? Why did you call me 'Mr. J'? And more importantly, where IS here?" Jerome asked Harley Quinn, who laughed.

"Oh, Mr. J, haven't you taken a look in the mirror lately?" asked Harley, before waving her hand and inexplicably causing a full-length mirror to appear.

Jerome gasped in shock as he gazed into the mirror. He was suddenly wondering if this was a dream. Looking right back at him was the one and only Clown Prince of Crime, in his Arkham Origins incarnation. As Jerome, or rather, the Joker, drew closer to the mirror, he slowly began to realize that this wasn't just a dream. He had truly become Joker.

"Harley, how did this happen to me? And don't tell me I fell into a vat of chemicals," Joker told Dr. Quinzel.

"This is what happens when you buy fan merchandise from vendors in cloaks. You've become a Displaced," explained Harley.

"Displaced? What's a Displaced?" Joker asked Harley, a look of interest on his smiling face.

"Basically, a Displaced is someone, usually a geek at a convention like E3 or San Diego Comic-Con, who buys enchanted merchandise from a mysterious vender called the Void, gets transformed into the character they're dressed up like, and then gets dumped off in some form of Equestria to do as they wish, date or marry whoever they wish, you get the idea," explained Harley.

"I see... when am I in Equestria?"

"Like I said, it's during the Return to Harmony, Part 2 to be more precise. Look, Joker, I don't really have time to play 20 Questions, so how's about I just explain how some of your weapons work, okay?" asked Harley. Joker nodded. "Okay, great! Your Razor Cards are as easy as just throwing them, no duh, right? Your Chattering Teeth need to be wound up and placed on the ground, then they'll wander off until they run into someone. Your dart gun is just as simple as point and shoot, same with your toy gun. One squeeze of the trigger will cause the flag to pop out, and more squeezes will fire real bullets," explained Harley.

"Good to know, my dear. Say, how do I go about getting more ammo for my gun? Or more Titan for my dart gun?" Joker asked Harley.

"Good question. Both guns are enchanted by the Void himself to refill at midnight every night," said Harley. "Sorry, Mr. J, I gotta get going now. Good luck out here in Equestria!" said Harley, before she slowly faded away and vanished.

Smiling broadly, Joker stood up and began to make his way towards Ponyville.

"Better look out, Equestria! The Clown Prince of Crime is in town, and we're gonna have a Tartarus of a time! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha haaaaaaaa!" laughed Joker.

...

Meanwhile, a group of five anthro ponies, two unicorns, two Earth Ponies, and a pegasus were walking towards Ponyville themselves, although they had a decent ways to go yet. "Come on, girls, if we can get back to the library, I have a book that I just know will give us a clue!" said one of the unicorns, who, unlike her friends who were the same shade of gray as a rock, had a lavender coat, a dark blue mane and tail, both of which had a magenta stripe in them, and wore a purple jacket, a white shirt with a magenta starburst on it, black pants, and magenta and purple sneakers.

No sooner had the unicorn, who was named Twilight Sparkle, said this than she was trampled by a gang of bunnies with unusually long legs.

Recognizing one of the bunnies, the pegasus, Fluttershy, who was usually seen with a butter yellow coat and a light pink mane and tail wearing a leaf green sweater, blue jeans, and pink sandals, called out, "Good boy, Angel! Mama's so proud!"

Meanwhile, the other unicorn, who was usually white with a beautiful purple mane and tail wearing a black dress with a belt and black and blue heels named Rarity, and the two earth ponies, one of whom was normally orange with a blonde mane and tail wearing a brown stetson hat, a green long-sleeved work shirt, a brown belt, blue jeans, and brown cowboy boots named Applejack, the other normally had a pink coat and a bushy pink mane and tail wearing a yellow t-shirt, a blue skirt, and orange sandals named Pinkie Pie, were arguing and bickering over the large boulder Rarity was dragging along with her, which for some bizarre reason she seemed to think was a diamond.

"Ah'm tellin' ya, Rarity, Ah distinctly heard Pinkie Pie plannin' ta steal that there diamond right out from under yer muzzle," said Applejack, her left eye twitching as she spoke.

"Oh, sure! Like YOU weren't planning on doing the same thing when Rarity fell asleep!" snapped Pinkie Pie.

"Both of you, STAY AWAY FROM MY DIAMOND!" yelled Rarity.

The sounds of their bickering reached Twilight's ears, and she gave a huge sigh. The sooner they got to Ponyville, got the Elements, and stopped Discord, the farther away she could get from those four irritating mares.

...

Meanwhile, at Golden Oaks Library, we find a purple-and-green dragon who as about the height of a fifteen-year old human boy wearing what appeared to be makeshift armor, underneath which he wore a purple hoodie, a dark green t-shirt, blue jeans, and purple and green tennis shoes. This was Spike the Dragon, and he was the surrogate son/brother of Twilight Sparkle.

So far, Spike had been doing a pretty decent job holding down the fort from everything from book monsters to rogue quills and ink jars. At the moment however, he was taking a well-deserved breather. Well, that is until someone began knocking on the library door.

Who in the wide, wide, world of Equestria could that be? It had better not be a monster, or else it's gonna get a face full of flames, thought Spike as he got up to answer the door.

"Well, hello there! Spike the Dragon, isn't it?" asked a voice that Spike realized belonged to a clown wearing a dark purple leather trench coat, a white shirt, a green vest, black jeans with a black belt, black leather gloves, and black dress shoes. The clown also had chalk white skin, green hair and eyes, and ruby red smile that stretched from ear to ear.

Needless to say, Spike was more than a little scared.

"Oh, I see... Twilight's taught you not to talk to strangers. Well, I think I know a way to work around that, my dear drake. My name is Joker, and I've traveled through time and space to get here," said Joker, holding out a hand for Spike to shake.

Nervously, Spike reached up and shook Joker's hand... only to get shocked into unconsciousness by his Joy Buzzer.

"Sorry, Spike, but I think it might be best for you to sleep through this one. Especially since you're going to be regurgitating letters non-stop for awhile, if I recall correctly," said Joker, before giving a short laugh. "Now, then, time to set up a little homecoming present for the Mane 6!"